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subwaysurf45 · 2 years

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Daunting Doctor’s Visit

Summary: going to the doctor’s had never really been a fun idea to you, it wasn’t a good time. luckily Bucky’s happy to be your plus one when you have your yearly physical packed with everything you’ve been putting off for a while.

Words: 3,112

Warnings: takes place a doctor’s office, mentions of blood work, pap smear, medications, birth control, other medical issue, inaccurate descriptions of medical procedures, inaccurate medical advice.

Your foot wouldn’t stop tapping, the rest of your body was still but your foot was moving fast. You had your bag over your arm and your jacket on, ready at the door and anxiously waiting. With the way your arms were crossed you could see your watch, counting the seconds until the following minute, doing the math to know how fast you needed to get there.

“Sorry,” Bucky ran down the stairs, the entire old house creaked, “sorry, the fucking call went longer than expected, I really-” “Tell me in the car please,” you pointed at the shoes you had laid out for him to literally slip into, “we really have to go.”

“I got you,” Bucky had his shoes on in no time, opening the door for you and linking his arm with yours, “we’re not going to be late, it’s alright.”

The doctor's office wasn’t exactly paradise on Earth, there had never been a moment at the office where you were scarred to the extent that you swore never to come back; it just made you extremely uncomfortable. You were going for a yearly physical and also a pap smear, blood work, and a talk about your medications. Normally you’d wait until everything pilled up so you could make one trip and forget about it for the rest of the year.

Bucky drove with one hand on the wheel and the other holding your hand on the center console, you had told Bucky early in your relationship about being on birth control and other meds to help with your mental health, and the moment you realized he was the one was when he started to pay and pick up your birth control for you. Never complained about it once and even made sure you took it, the same with the other meds.

“We’re not going to be late,” he said at the red light, “nothing to worry about.” he looked over to see your head down, trying to focus on your breathing, “good deep breathes, babe, really good,” the hand that was holding yours was brought to his lips.

“Can you hold my hand during the pap smear?” you whispered.

“I can hold your hand the entire time if you want,” he squeezed your hand, “I don’t care if I’m sitting on the examination table with you or awkwardly reaching across the room, alright?” you nodded and the light turned green, Bucky kissed your hand again and drove forward.

There had been times when you’d talk to your mom about being tired too often and she’d randomly spring it on the doctor, they’d ask to take blood and you couldn’t exactly say no even though you were not prepared for it in the slightest. When you were first put on birth control was not for sex at all, your dad was still livid at the idea of a high schooler taking a pill like that.

You could feel the judgement of the other people in the room, everyone was looking at one another as they tried to figure out what was wrong with someone. There would be times when old people or children would openly stare at you, with no shame at all when you sat there on your own. Nothing was wrong with you, you either wanted to switch medication or needed to get a vaccine but it felt like people had other ideas about you.

“What if they think we’re pregnant?” you asked as you sat in the parking lot, not ready to get out of the car yet.

“So what?” Bucky faced you, having already unbuckled you and himself.

“They’ll think I’m a slut for having a kid so early,” your hands rubbed together, “they’ll think we’re trying to get rid of it.”

“Babe,” Bucky leaned forward and made you look at him, “you’ll never see these people again, I promise you that. And if you do?” a smile graced his lips, “they won’t recognize you, they’re not going to point you out at the grocery store at the girl who went to the doctors that one day in the summer, alright?” his hand cupped your cheek, “I know it’s scary, but I believe no one will pay any mind to you, I won’t let go of your hand,” his lips pressed against your temple, “I promise.”

“Okay,” you whispered, “let’s go.”

You sat in the waiting room after checking in, you had Bucky’s hand in your lap to trace and fiddle with. You’d clean out the small bits of dirt from under his nails, or gently run the pad of your thumb over his nail bed. Your eyes were heavily focused on his hand, the veins and his knuckles, there were so many things to trace and count you simply didn’t have the time.

“Babe,” Bucky whispered, “they called you.”

You stood and so did Bucky, following you to the back and into one of many rooms. The doctor quickly joined you, shaking Bucky’s hand. “I’m Dr. Reaya, a pleasure to meet you.”

“You too,” Bucky smiled and sat with you on the table.

“Okay, so,” she flipped through the pages, “how about we get the pap over and done with, how does that sound?”

“Good,” you nodded and immediately picked up Bucky’s hand.

“Are you nervous?”

You didn’t respond, shutting your eyes tightly to prevent any tears from slipping through. Bucky never talked over you or for you, he was good about letting you have your voice. But he knew when to pipe in, “she’s nervous about everything.”

“It’ll hurt more if you’re nervous,” she pulled the straps down for your feet, “if you could take your bottoms off and lay back on the table, placing your feet in the stirrups that would be appreciated.” she left after that, giving you both a moment.

“Here,” he held out his hand after you took your bottoms off, he placed them on the chair he had brought up to the table before sitting on them. “You’re alright,” he whispered and helped you to get under the sheet.

“May I come back in?” the Doctor asked, and Bucky answered for you.

“Can I hold your hand?” you whispered as the Doctor and another nurse walked in, they were preparing for the examination and didn’t hear you.

Bucky didn’t verbally answer, all he did was take your hand into his and brought it close to his chest. He was watching you tentatively, but he hid it well.

“Alright,” the nurse began, talking you through everything, “you’re going to feel a slight cramp…” her voice trailed off, “please try not to stiffen,” her voice sounded as though her brows were pulled together and her tongue poked out of her lips.

“Hey, look at me,” Bucky hushed, “remember how we first met?” he smiled, “at the party?”

“Yeah,” you grunted out.

“Can you tell me?”

Natasha had left you to hook up with a guy, you were proud of her. After that horrendous dumping by her Ex, you knew Steve would treat her right, maybe for more than a night. The only issue was that you were left alone at a party you weren’t invited to, these were Natasha’s friends and it was obvious. It was like you were invisible in the backyard where smoke and laughter filled the air.

You stood off to the side with a classic red cup in your hand, slowly sipping it and looking around for someone to talk to, anyone really. These people were frat boys who didn’t make the cut, people who brought the high school to university to make sure they kept living their glory days for as long as possible. The girls acted like in every movie out there, the cheerleader who ran the squad, all yelling over one another to get someone’s attention. It was weird to see them all be so passive, preaching about feminism while pulling up old ugly photos of people they barely knew. Natasha wasn’t like that but somehow accepted it.

“Are you dissecting them with your eyes?” two guys approached you, “I don’t think it’s any fun to stand and watch the party, there are guys trying to convince everyone to jump in their pool.”

“I’m guessing you two want to hide from the awkward no?” you laughed as you took a sip of whatever was in your drink.

“Precisely,” the other one spoke, he was handsome and quiet. Long brown hair sat perfectly in his face, enough to cover his features but not enough to have him shake his mane out so he could see better.

“I’m Sam, this is James.”

“Nice to meet you,” you reached out and shook their hands, “I’m waiting for my friend.”

“Who?” Sam asked, shifting his weight and getting more comfortable in the conversation, it seemed he actually wanted to stay and talk.

“Natasha,” the moment you said her name the two boy’s faces lit up, they looked at each other with the widest smiles; only to be described as boy smiles.

Sam reached out and grabbed your shoulder, but only James noticed your slight flinch. “Is she with Steve?”

“Yeah-”

“Yes!” Sam yelled, also causing you to flinch back. “He’s been going after your friend forever, changing how he walks to classes, stalking her Instagram, this entire party he’s been hyping himself up to talk to her.”

You felt comfortable, “it was probably Natasha who made the first move.”

“I also agree,” James laughed, “she seemed headstrong and my boy was-and still is-shit whipped for her,” they both started laughing.

“I’m y/n by the way,” you smiled.

James’ lips slightly parted, “sorry, completely forgot to ask, we’re so caught up in our friend's sex life recently it’s been getting in the way,” James quickly shot one eyebrow up, his hand was going to your shoulder to either playfully punching it or squeeze it to apologize but he caught himself, awkwardly moving the hair out of his eyes.

“Nice to meet you,” Sam said after looking over his shoulder, “I’ll see you around, y/n.”

“Likewise,” you smiled and waved, James didn’t leave. You just stared at him before sipping your drink, breaking and fixing your eye contact rapidly. “Sorry,” you whispered.

“What are you sorry about?” James smiled, he wasn’t holding a drink so his hands found the pockets of his jeans.

You were known for apologizing for no reason, “I-sorry-I do that sometimes, nothing is worth apologizing over but it fills the awkward silence.”

“I see,” James smiled and looked around, “look, I wanted to come over because you looked very scared, I’ve been sober all night, do you want me to drive you home?” he pained through a smile, “and I know it’s not ideal to have a man who you don’t know, have no proof that he’s sober, and has only talked to you about your friend’s sex lives-” you both laughed a little more, “-I know it’s not your first choice, I can even pay for an Uber if you want.”

“I don’t know,” you looked down into your cup.

“I don’t want to like…kick you out, that’s the last thing I want,” he stepped closer, “but I also know exactly how you feel in the sense that you don’t really know anyone and you’re standing off in the corner, it’s boring and lonesome and maybe you don’t like me and just want to go home, who knows,” he shrugged, “you seem like a girl with too much on her mind, I want to help ease that.”

“Why are you so good at that?” You whispered into your cup, fighting back the stupid childish tears that were forming. Why was crying so easy when alcohol was in your system?

“Did I-” James cut himself off, “I live here, do you want to go to my room for some quiet?” he noticed your tears, “shit, I am so sorry, y/n,” he hovered his hand over your shoulders, after a gentle nod he placed them down, “come to my room, I’ll let you have some peace and quiet.”

You kept your head down as you walked, no one paid any mind. It was too late that night for people to be alert or even care about a stranger, no one knew you were crying. James walked behind you with his hand on your shoulder, it just so happened you walked inside first. After climbing the stairs you looked over your shoulder and James walked ahead of you, taking you to his small room.

“Here, I’ll run downstairs and grab some water for you,” he smiled and quickly left.

Even in your jeans, your party top, your makeup, in everything…the moment you laid back in bed you fell asleep right away.

“There we go, all done,” the nurse said.

“That’s it?” you gasped, “it’s done?”

“The hard part is done, I’ll step outside and you can put your bottoms back on and then we can talk about the other stuff,” the nurse smiled as she followed the doctor outside of the room.

“Way to go,” Bucky leaned over and kissed you, it was like he was breathing a deep breath into your lungs, “god, I’m fucking proud of you,” he kissed your forehead next, “we’re definitely stopping for a coffee on the way home, especially if they take your blood but also for a little reward, alright?”

“Thank you,” you breathed out as you slipped on your shorts, “I love you,” the words were so casual between the two of you but in moments like these the weight of them changed.

“Love you too, baby,” Bucky kissed you again, you loved it when he didn’t ask and would just go for it, making it seem like he couldn’t hold back long enough.

The rest of the doctor's appointment was somewhat smooth sailing, they took blood and you saw the way Bucky’s brows were continuously pinched together, his eyes scanned your face probably because it lost a little bit of colour. You got one vaccine which was in and out, the last thing on your agenda was your medications.

“I feel really foggy when I take them if that makes sense,” you fiddled with your fingers as you spoke, “like some film over the way I see the world and I miss the way it was, all of my memories are happier once I compare them to the mental state I’m in,” your eyes flicked to Bucky who looked slightly upset, “and I don’t mean that I’m unhappy now, well-...” you sighed and rubbed your forehead, “I have everything I’ve ever wanted right now, a wonderful boyfriend, a well-paying job, friendships, no stress about money - I’m in the sweet spot right now, which makes me wonder why I’m not feeling ten out of ten right now if that makes sense…” you trialed off with a shrug.

“There are two ways we could approach this,” your Doctor looked at your chart, “you can either switch companies, every pharmaceutical company has a medication for you, you just might not have the right one.” you looked at Bucky and nodded, “or you can take a break with meds right now for about six months and then you can come back and we can re-access.”

“I think I’ll take a break,” you nodded.

“Wonderful,” your Doctor smiled and wrote something down.

With nothing else left to talk about you left, feeling lighter and more confident in yourself. Bucky kept his word and bought you a coffee on the way home, even getting a cookie for you two to split. He was his normal self the entire way home, Bucky wasn’t the type of guy to need to talk all the time, he was quite alright with silence between two people.

Once you were home you sprawled out on the bed, “my fucking arm,” you sighed, “that vaccine takes so much out of you.”

“I have a question,” Bucky disregarded what you said and laid down beside you, also laying on his stomach and looking right at you, “when you were talking about your happiness I-”

“Bucky, don’t,” you reached out and touched his lips, “I’m happy with you and I love you and it’s my own brain that puts a black-and-white filter over things sometimes, it’s not you, I’m fully happy with you.”

“Okay,” he said quietly, “just tell me if there’s anything I can do.”

“Anything you can do?” you repeated as you rolled over on top of him, straddling his abs, “you drove me to an appointment I could have driven to myself, you held my hand during my pap smear, you bought me a coffee, and you make me so happy everyday-I don’t think there’s anything else you can do, you’re the perfect guy!” you laughed and leaned forward, hugging him tightly.

“Alright,” he blushed and tried to hide his face, “you make me happy too,” he muttered, “really fucking happy, like, my heart beats a little faster every time I see you.”

“Shut up,” you giggled, trying to roll off of him.

Bucky grabbed you tightly and rolled with you, finding space between your legs so he could be as close as possible. Out of nowhere, he began to tickle you, he admitted once he did it to get your real laugh out. You had a fake one because you thought your real laugh was loud and ugly, not wanting to startle people. But when he found that spot on your waist you threw your head back with a cackle, trying to get him to stop.

“I’m gonna pee!” you screamed, he was switching between your neck, waist, and armpits. You attempted to fight back by tickling him but that let him sneak under your arms.

“Let me hear that laugh!” he yelled over your pleads for him to stop, once you let it out and began to really laugh he somewhat slowly down but didn’t entirely stop. His hands were fast as he moved from every place on your body, half of the spots weren’t ticklish but you were in the laughing mood-

“Ow, my fucking sore arm!”

“...sorry…”

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fineprintedsunsets · 4 months

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Кролик; Bunny

ೃ⁀➷ It's the dreaded time of month and all you want to do is curl up in bed. Your soldat has other plans. ೃ⁀➷ p in v sex. dirty talk. soldat!bucky. mentions of blood. period sex. (soldat not giving a fuck). breeding kink. mentions of pads/pain. fingering. possible typos. ೃ⁀➷ 1.2k

i hate my period so much, writing about this brute helps me cope🧸

seb masterlist

Oh no. No. No. Not today. Not now.

Fuck, You hate mother nature.

The sheets of your bed are stained a red hue. Little spots and specks paint the white fabric and your thighs are sticky with blood.

Your fucking period. If you had enough energy you could just slam a fist into the wall, broken bones be damned.

You whimpered and whined all the way to the shower, stomach aching, legs weak. You made sure to tear off the sheets and add them to the heaping pile of laundry in your room.

As soon as you stripped yourself of your clothes and felt the steaming water hit your skin, all was forgiven. The sound of water hitting the cheap chipped tile was so relaxing you would give everything you had to be in this state forever.

Unfortunately, a girl has a water bill.

ღ

You changed your clothes, put on low-cut shorts, and bought a shit ton of pads. It was only the first day and your flow was already heavy.

The cramps were bearable, but you could tell they were going to get a whole lot worse. Which led to your current state, in bed, lights turned off, head against a cold pillow, and blinds drawn.

An unbreakable fortress of cold pillows and snakes you managed to hoard in anticipation for this day's arrival.

You couldn’t turn on the tv, the light was harsh and irritating. So you just sat in darkness, eating Resses and groaning in pain.

Your only thought was “when would he arrive"?

ღ

“Кролик” (Bunny) a heavy voice woke you from your sleep. A familiar musk of gunpowder and him filled your head.

“You're bleeding.” He says from the shadows. You find your fingers gripping your blankets in both anticipation and fear. Your breath hitches.

He smells it, smells you.

“You need to be bred.”

Fuck.

The Winter Soldier, soldat, in his six-foot-tall frame, rounds the side of your bed. The harsh fabric of his suit, made to withstand all kinds of obstacles was now in front of your vision.

The soldat didn’t bother to take his combat boots off before sliding into bed with you. He kneeled on the mattress, denting it.

You waited in anticipation, legs slightly parted, breath coming in slow gasps as heat filled your entire body.

“Remove your shorts. Or is it too painful?” In a way, he’s mocking you, a way of saying you will always need his help. If you weren’t drunk off him right now, you’d recoil. Sober you would not have heat pooling in her core right now.

“Hurts- Soldat. Please take them off.” You wiggled your hips to emphasize. The soldats mask covers his face, muffling the groan he made when sliding the fabric off your legs.

Your body jolted when cold metal fingers met your clothed core. You tried your best to hold in the moan you held in your throat.

“Shh…quiet, кролик” You know there’s blood on your panties, you know the soldat does too.

Except, he doesn't seem to give a shit. His fingers prod at your entrance before removing your panties entirely, along with the pad stuck to them.

The soldat looks at your cunt, the mask hiding any real facial expression. You shiver from the cold air hitting your exposed folds.

He takes two metal fingers and slides them through your folds, gathering both blood and slick. The soldat purrs as you whine. “Relax -Going to hurt, stay still.”

You do as you are told, unable to stop the soldat as he places a flesh hand against your stomach, while two metal digits slide into your cunt.

"Beautiful, sweetheart.” The Soldat hums, pushing down just a little on your tummy as the digits slowly slide in and out of you. The pain eases at whatever he’s doing to you, and pleasure becomes more prominent.

You can hear the sound of your slick as he fingers you, your back arching off the bed as he picks up the pace, adding more pressure to your stomach. “Good, кролик. Right there.”

“Doing so well for your soldat. -think you can cum for him? Hmm?”

Fuck. The edge is so fucking close and your itching to barrel over it. The soldier can feel your cunt squeezing his fingers and can see the look in your eyes as you're about to come.

His metal digits speed up, going at a pace that is sure to push you over the edge. He releases his flesh hand from your stomach to pinch your aching clit.

It’s over from there. “Soldat! Soldat- fuck ” you cry out, heart pumping and legs shaking as he works you through it, pumping his fingers in and out of you.

“So good for your soldat. Look so pretty when you come for him, so beautiful.” The soldat slides his fingers out of you, wiping your juices on his pant leg.

The soldier undoes his belt buckle, sliding off the weapon-studded pants and throwing them into the darkness of the bedroom. His cock is throbbing, angry, and red.

“Ready to be bred, Кролик? Take all you're given?” His boxers are next, his metal hand wraps around the waistband. The fabric is torn from his body in one snap.

Your legs shake and your hips squirm as he lines his cock up with your entrance, his body crowding over you, balancing himself with a hand on the headboard. “You're so wet. I bet I’d just…”

His cock nudges your fold, “-Slide right in.” The pain hits you immediately as the soldat bottoms out. You can hear him curse in Russian under the mask, as he rests his head on your shoulder.

Skin meets skin as he gives time for you to adjust to his size. You’ve taken him many times before, but it’s different on your cycle.

It’s like your womb opens up a little more for him.

“So good, sweetheart.” He moans, sliding out to just half of his length before snapping his hips to you. You can feel everything. Every throbbing vein on his cock, every breath he groans through his mask.

The Soldat always has a primal urge when you're bleeding, he needs to come inside you, needs to breed your cunt.

He wants to mark you as his.

“Soldat-" you moan, feeling his cock slide out another couple of inches, until he’s balls deep again, kissing your cervix with the tip of his cock.

The entire bed shakes with the force of the soldat fucking you, and he fucks you hard. He’s so needy, desperate to fill you up with his seed. His moans and groans do not go unheard as his flesh hand presses on your stomach.

“Watch me fuck you, Кролик. See me sliding in and out?” All you can do is nod your head, words do not come easily.

Winter Soldier presses that hand on your tummy, pushing down as he stills, balls pressed to your skin as his cock twitches inside of you. “Feel me in your guts."

A few more thrusts has you clamping down on his cock, and when the soldier feels it, he goes fucking feral.

“Milk your Soldat's cock while he fills up your pretty pussy.” The soldier does exactly as he promises, shooting rope after rope of cum inside you.

Later, he flips you on your back so your pressed to his muscled chest, cock stuffing you full, keeping his load inside you. The Soldat mutters something like, “helps with the pain.”

And damn him, he’s right.

#fanfic #masterlist #oneshot #marvel #smut #buckbarnes #bucky barns fanfiction #bucky x reader #buckybarnessmut #winter solider smut #fluff #the winter soldier #wintersoldier #winter soldier smut #period fic #buckybarnesperiodfic

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lanabuckybarnes · 1 month

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Always.

This is a sequel to Empty Words. I had someone ask for it and I was also thinking of writing one so here it is. I don’t know if it’ll be as good as the first part but I hope it’s up to your standards.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: none?? If you see any plz lemme know and I’ll add them.

Words: 1.1k

EMPTY WORDS

"How long has it been?"

"70 years."

The words replayed in her head constantly. It had been a year since that day, since she’d woken from her Cryo-sleep. Steve sat by her side telling her it was no longer 1945 but much later, she shouldn’t even be alive.

Tony, Howard Stark's son, had been generous enough to offer her a place to stay at the compound. She had been fed by the girl, Wanda, every day and they gave her peace since she so desperately needed it.

She never got to grieve for Bucky, not long after Steve told her of his passing, she was captured. For some Hydra experiments, according to the guy who turned green.

She still had Bucky’s jacket. She’d woken up with it wrapped around her frame, and she refused to take it off. It was the only part of him she had left.

A knock sounded throughout the room. "It's me, I've got dinner," Steve spoke from the other end of the door, his voice slightly muffled by the thick wood.

"Come in." She spoke, her words monotone and quiet.

He set the tray of food down on the bed, pasta and sauce. Wanda’s favourite. He picked up on her gloom quite easily, it must have been a perk of the super soldier serum.

"Are you alright?" Steve questioned softly, a reassuring hand rubbing her shoulder clad in the dark military jacket. He watched as she picked at the food but never put any of it near her mouth.

He knew better than to push people to talk about their feelings, he hated it when people did it to him.

They had both bonded over Bucky. In the 40s, they never really got the chance— he was too busy being Captain America, and she was too busy saving people's lives away from the frontline. He had never really spoken to her, he knew a bit about her from his old friend’s stories but besides telling her about Buck he’d never really seen her himself. In the past year though, the two had become good friends.

"It's... our anniversary, today." Her voice was small, like the squeak of a mouse, almost as if speaking any louder would scare him away. Steve didn't know how to answer. He was an excellent soldier and had always been great with words, but even he became tongue-tied at the mention of Bucky.

He blamed himself, he could have done so much better than what he did. Countless nights he stayed awake wondering how he could have changed the past, how he could convince Tony to invent some contraption and put himself in Bucky's place. Maybe he would have survived the fall.

"I'm sorry," Steve's voice mimicked her own. His arms wrapped around her smaller frame in a warm embrace, the only form of comfort he could truly give her at that moment.

She cried into his arms that night. When he eventually left she’d flopped her weak body onto the large bed that was far too comfy. She tossed and turned with Bucky's coat, hoping, wishing that dreaming hard enough would bring him back.

The compound was under attack, she had strict orders to stay in her room. Steve had warned her, promised that he’d keep them away from her but passed her a pistol as a last resort.

She could hear the sounds of bullets flying around, hitting walls and people. She felt helpless just sitting on the wide windowsill watching the world go by, what could she truly do though?

Just as a dark feathered bird flew by her window the hairs on her neck stood on end— there were eyes on her, someone stood at her door. She mentally cursed herself for setting the gun on the bedside table.

The presence stalked forward, till his thigh bumped her shoulder. Her head tried to turn to him but the feeling of coolness; a metal hand, spread over the top of her head and turned her back to face the window slowly.

The cool fingers dropped to the side of her face, tucking a few loose stands behind her ear. Was he trying to torture her? or was she finally receiving a final act of kindness before the sweet release of death? Her eyes squeezed tight in preparation, no matter the outcome she would not watch.

Death never came, no, instead the soldier flopped his large body down beside her. He was still as rigid as before, she could feel as much from the way his arm brushed against hers.

When she finally turned to look at the face of the last man she’d ever see, her killer— the muscles around her eyes pulled them wide and her breath caught in her throat.

His eyes, although obstructed by dark locks of her, emulated hers, shock evident in those deep blues along with the reflection of something she knew danced in hers— Recognition.

“B-Bucky?” She hadn’t realised tears were falling from her eyes until she spoke, her voice breaking. His head nodded softly, almost unnoticeable and his eyes glazed over as well. After all these years they were both alive, and the past 70 years' worth of bottled-up emotions bubbled over. She pulled him forward into her arms.

The way his tired body slumped forward into her frame told her he’d faced a similar story, he’d been holding onto a lot too. She could see Steve’s frame standing in her doorway in shock from her peripherals but she couldn’t find the will to glance at him. Not when he was here, not when Bucky was home.

“You came back” she whispered into his hair.

“Always”.

“Bahhhh!” God those goats were impatient. It must’ve been around 6 am, and the Wakandan heat blared through the mud-coloured walls.

“BAHHHH” the goat wailed again, more desperate and demanding than before. A groan sounded from the man behind her, his arm pulling her close and his lips ghosting over her bare shoulder.

“You gotta get up and feed them” she whispered silently hoping they’d disappear and leave them in each other’s arms, at least for a little bit longer. The heat made their embrace almost impossible to withstand but she’d missed years' worth of closeness to him, some sun wasn’t going to stop her now.

His grumbling vibrated against her neck before he pushed himself up to sit. He was quite the sight shirtless, much more muscular than before. The soft blue fabric wrapping around his left side and over his shoulder complimented his skin perfectly.

“Fucking goats” he complained as he threw the deep red fabric over his body, doing as much as he could with one arm before shifting to her for help.

Her fingers moved expertly over the fabric as they did every day, fastening it to his body before pulling half of his long hair into a bun.

“Love you” Her breath blew between his shoulder blades, her lips pressing into the nape of his neck as she wrapped the thin belt around his waist from behind— she’d become so familiar with the routine she could secure it with her eyes shut. He couldn’t help the way his worries fell apart at her soft touch.

His body twisted to face her naked one, his right hand finding her left, squeezing tight before dropping his fingers to roll the thin gold band around her ring finger; a symbol of his promise fulfilled. The matching one secured around his neck.

Steel blues ran up from their joined hand to her face, searching for her own eyes, asking in silence for permission that she was glad to give him as she leaned forward locking their lips together in a sultry dance that mimicked one of the many they shared all those years ago.

“Bahhhhh” he growled into the kiss and she couldn’t help the bubble of laughter rising from her throat. He’d never get a moment's peace with his girl with those beasts around.

Tags: @matchat3a

#bucky barnes #bucky x female reader #bucky x reader #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky fanfic #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #marvel #mcu bucky barnes #james bucky barnes #the winter soldier #winter soldier #winter solider x reader

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hotreadingwitch · 9 months

Text

Bucky x Reader - Drunk in Love

Content Warnings/Kinks: alcohol, grinding, spitting, hair pulling, choking, dominance, daddy kink, praise kink, cum swallowing, fingering, oral sex, unprotected sex

Drunk in Love

Y/n sat in an armchair in the common room of the Avengers compound. She'd spent the evening sharing multiple bottles with her best friend, Bucky Barnes. Little did he know she had a huge crush on him.

A song then came on that made Y/n want to dance. Usually, she wouldn't have been so bold, but due to the alcohol's strong influence, she got up and began to shake her hips anyway. Not the type to dance, Bucky sat his legs spread, hungrily watching Y/n's every move.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Y/n questioned coyly, a drunken smile spreading across her lips.

"You know why Y/n" Bucky retorted in a husky tone.

Y/n quirked an eyebrow before slowly sauntering over to Bucky and straddling him. Continuing to the beat of the music Y/n began to grind herself on him. He watched her as if hypnotized. Bucky gripped her hips with his strong hands, pulling her further down onto him. She threw her head back in pleasure as she kept grinding. Bucky then leaned forward and began sucking on her neck causing her to whimper.

"Don't tease me like that Y/n" he growled, turned on by her sounds.

Y/n ignored him, her breathing hard.

Suddenly, Bucky gripped Y/n's hair in one hand and circled the other around her throat.

"I said don't tease me," he said darkly before spitting into her open mouth, "Got it?"

"You're sure you don't like to be teased, Buck?" Y/n returned, getting up off his lap causing him to groan, as if disgruntled by the loss of contact.

She then began to strip until she was standing bare in front of him, "Because I think you do"

Bucky bit his lip, a low rumble escaping his throat as he surveyed her naked body. His eyes flitted up and down like he couldn't decide what to focus his hungry gaze on.

"You wanna play doll?" He said gruffly, "Then come here and put that pretty little mouth to good use".

"Yes Bucky" Y/n responded to his command instantly.

"That's 'yes Daddy' to you" he growled again.

Y/n nodded slowly, taking in his seductive words as she sunk to her knees in front of him. She caressed the hard spot in his jeans before unzipping his jeans and removing his cock from the fabric that it was straining against. He smirked, looking down at her and enjoying her shocked reaction to his size. She began first by licking up and down his shaft, wetting it all with the tip of her tongue. Then, Y/n took the top half of his long length into her mouth and started to suck. She continued, each stroke taking in more and more of him, earning groans of pleasure from him.

"You're doing such a good job," he praised, stroking her cheek with his cool metal hand.

She then added her hands, using them to glide up and down the bottom half of his shaft, gripping it. Soon, his chest was heaving and she could feel him throbbing in her mouth. Y/n moaned, savouring that familiar salty taste.

Y/n yelped as Bucky's strong hands gripped her, pulling her up off of her knees and onto the couch's comfortable cushions.

"Can I eat you out now doll? He questioned, still out of breath.

"Yes please, Daddy" she practically writhed under his heated stare.

Bucky slunk down her frame without breaking eye contact and positioned himself in front of her already wet pussy.

"What are you doing?" Y/n whined as she waited for Bucky to start, sliding her hands into his cropped hair, desperate for him to please her.

"I want to hear you beg for it," he said plainly, his lust clear in his blue eyes.

His hot breath on her pussy made her squirm in anticipation

"Please, please Daddy" she begged, blush tinging her cheeks before whispering "You know I want you so bad"

"Hmm, I guess I have to give it to you then huh?"

"Please" she continued, throwing her head back in frustration.

He then began sucking on her clit, making her spread her legs open instinctively to give him easier access.

"Ahh" Y/n whimpered, the initial sensitivity making her shiver.

He circled his tongue around her, making that part of her grow tenser and tenser with each lick. He then switched methods, flicking his tongue up and down between gentle kisses on her clit. Her sensitivity was through the roof as he pleased her causing her pussy to clench.

"Oh uh-huh" she moaned as the feeling started to build.

Bucky continued tickling her with his tongue before sliding two vibranium fingers into her. They curled up towards her belly as he continued, now sucking roughly on her clit. The combination made her begin to tense up even more in anticipation, her stomach becoming taut and hard to the touch.

"Fuck you feel so good" Y/n gasped as Bucky kept pumping in and out of her, looking down at him in admiration.

Soon, Bucky sensed that she was about to burst.

"That's right doll" he encouraged between licks, "Cum for me"

As if he was commanding her, Y/n's body began to shake, overwhelmed by waves of pleasure. She jerked up and down, grinding on his mouth as she came, chasing the feeling until it was over.

"Ohh oh"

She looked down, both out of breath and thoroughly satisfied, to see his chin coated with her sticky substance which he licked up gratefully. Y/n turned around and motioned for Bucky to enter her from behind. Even though she'd just cum she was ready to beg for more if necessary.

"So desperate for me doll" he whispered in her ear before sliding in.

He thrust inside, pumping slowly at first before speeding up to an incredibly satisfying tempo. The force of him pounding into her was enough to make her legs shake slightly. Y/n shoved her face into a pillow to stop herself from being too loud.

"C'mon baby, let me hear you" Bucky grunted, tangling his fingers in her hair, making her back arch.

"Yes D-Daddy" she moaned aloud, her words stuttering due to the incredible pleasure she was feeling.

Bucky continued to pound into her, thrusting on beat with the music that was still playing in the compound. Y/n reached down and began to rub her clit. The combination of Bucky fucking her and her playing with the sensitive area was exactly what she needed. As they continued Y/n's pussy started to tense up around Bucky's thrusting cock, pleasing both of them.

"Just like that doll", he grunted, his hand gripping her from underneath, keeping her supported, "Keep being good for me".

It was clear both of them were close to their climaxes, Bucky was thrusting harder than ever and Y/n's insides were beginning to get warmer and warmer in anticipation of her orgasm.

"Fuck" Y/n screamed, then whimpering "I'm gonna cum".

"Beg for it doll" Bucky commanded, gripping her by the throat.

"Please let me cum Daddy, please"

"Good girl," he said, satisfied.

He thrust and thrust and thrust until Y/n was practically shuddering. Bucky then began slowing down his pace to allow for her maximal pleasure while she continued to rub her clit.

"Ohhh" Y/n moaned as waves of heat began to overwhelm her body.

Bucky grunted, cursing too as he came inside her, pushed over the edge by the feeling of her throbbing warm, "Fuck, fuck"

Y/n trembled, feeling warm and completely content. Bucky got up and grabbed her a towel, helping her to clean between her legs where their substances coated the area between her thighs.

"Thank you" she mumbled, blissed out.

"You're welcome" Bucky chuckled, looking down at her with a fond smile.

#smut #oneshot #fanfiction #fanfic #marvel smut #bucky x reader #bucky smut #james buchanan barnes #bucky #marvel fanfic #marvel #the avengers #winter soldier #winter solider x reader #winter solider smut

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themorningsunshine · 1 year

Text

Pretense

(Requested)

Masterlist

Pairing - Bucky Barnes x f!reader , platonic Avengers x reader

Summary - You have been with orverprotective parents your whole life, and it never bothered you as much. You know they mean well. Until they spew lies in front of your friends and ruin everything for you, including your chance at love.

Warnings - shitty parents, angst, fluff, misunderstandings, a lot of crying, slight language. not proofread

Word count - 7k (I need to be stopped)

a/n - This was requested by the lovely @caritobbg. I thought it would be a short one shot but it instead turned out to be the longest fic I have ever written. I tried to do the idea justice, hope you lile it, girl.

"Yeah, dad. I am at the tower."

"What do you mean why? I live AND work here."

"Yeah, I am taking care of myself, mom." "No, they don't fight each other all the time."

"No, Tony hasn't filled the tower with deadly robots." "No, Steve doesn't conduct history lessons here."

You sighed as your parents asked you for the 10th time this week if you were being kept hostage at the Avengers compound.

Your dad spoke from the other side of the phone. "You know we worry about you, princess. We just don't trust those superheroes."

You smiled a little at the nickname your dad had always called you since you were a little girl. "Yeah, dad, I understand that you worry about me but they are my friends and I trust them. I really wish you could trust them too."

Your parents had always been a little too protective of you. Being an only child, you were the object of their affection more often than not. It had never bothered you as much. You know they meant well.

But it had gotten much worse now. About a year ago, Tony Stark himself offered you a job to work with the avengers considering your skills and obviously, you said yes. It was an opportunity of a lifetime and you had found a family in the team too.

You hadn't told your parents about your new job for 6 months because you were afraid of their reaction. As you had anticipated, they didn't take their little girl working for superheroes very well.

Okay, that was an understatement. Your parents didn't trust the Avengers and they surely didn't trust them enough to be able to protect you. They took any chance they got to convince you to leave the job. All you wanted was for both of your families to get along. Maybe it was too much to ask for.

"Dad, we are friends. We look out for each other. We have each others' backs. Give them a chance, please. Why can't you try to trust them?"

"Hmm. Let me see. Your 'friends' consist of ex-assassins, a witch who used to work for Hydra, a "genius" and his scientist friend who created a robot that wanted to kill the whole of humanity. Oh, and the scientist also has huge anger issues. Like he literally turns into a monster when he is angry. Your best friend has killed more people than she can count. And this group of yours almost broke up once when the best friend of one killed the parents of another. Oh, and that soldier of yours has also reportedly killed a president. You are right. What's there to not trust?"

"Dad, he was brainwashed!!"

"Doesn't make him any less unstable."

You sighed. These arguments with your parents were a dead end. You knew you weren't going to get anywhere.

"Alright, mom, dad. I gotta go."

"Okay, sweetheart. Just take care of yourself. At least until we come to meet you next month."

You smiled at that. "Can't wait. I want to introduce you to everybody. Love you, guys. See you soon, Bye"

"We love you too, princess."

Your smile dropped as you hung up the phone and realization struck you. Your parents were going to visit and as much as you wanted them to meet everybody, you were scared. You could never be sure about how your parents would react. They were too unpredictable.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn't hear footsteps approaching.

"You okay, doll?"

The voice startled you as you turned back to be met by the beautiful blue of Bucky's eyes. You kept a hand on your chest to calm your breathing. "God, you scared me, Buck."

Bucky just chuckled as he looked at you, eyes filled with concern. "Well, maybe you should be careful who sneaks up on you, doll. This is not really the safest place on Earth."

"The only person who sneaks up on me is you, Bucky." You replied with a smile of your own, as you felt your concerns slipping away.

"Exactly my point. I am not really the most trustworthy person either."

"Then why do I trust you with my life?" The words slipped before you could think about how they would sound. Your cheeks turn little red as you look down at your feet. "You are too good for your own good," Bucky replied with a slight blush of his own and he meant it with everything he had. You were too pure and too trusting for this world. He would never know how he got to even call you his friend.

His eyes squinted as he noticed something. "Doll, there's something in your hair."

Before you could react, he took a step towards you and with gentle hands removed a piece of confetti out of your hair.

You ran your hands through your hair before looking up to thank him when you realized how close the both of you were standing. You were pretty sure he could hear how fast your heart was beating.

The both of you stood there staring into each other's eyes until Bucky took a step back, red color creeping up to his cheeks. He rubbed his neck, flustered, before finally speaking, "Um, I should - I should go."

You nodded your head, trying desperately to get your heart to beat normally. "Yeah, yeah. I'll see you around."

As Bucky walked away, you couldn't wipe off the smile from your face when suddenly your conversation with your parents hit you again.

God, it was going to be a long month.

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"And if you need anything, you can also ask Jarvis." You explained to your parents with the widest grin on your face.

"God, I can't believe you guys are finally here."

Your parents smiled at you before your mom engulfed you in a hug, 7th in the past 1 hour.

"Okay, guys. You know I love you both so much, but we are going to go in now and meet everybody. Can you please, please be nice?"

Your mom put her hand on her chest with a dramatic expression, "You don't trust us?"

You chuckled at how dramatic your mother could sometimes be. "I do, You know I do. But I also know as a matter of fact that both of you aren't very fond of my friends. And all I am asking is that you give them a chance. They are great people, mom. They are really really great and I care a lot about all of them. So, I just need you to be a little open-minded about them. That's all I am asking. Can you do that for me?" "Of course, we will, princess. We hate these inept superheroes but not as much as we love you."

Your parents then looked at each other a too long, which you didn't think much of, too excited at the prospect of your parents and friends getting along.

You took them inside the compound as they looked around in what you hoped was awe.

"Good morning, J.A.R.V.I.S" You greeted the AI just like you did every day.

"Good morning, Ms l/n"

Your parents looked around in shock trying to figure out where that voice came from when you chuckled. "Mom, dad, I told you, you need anything, just ask J.A.R.V.I.S"

Your dad narrowed his eyes at you. "Where is this JARVIS of yours?"

You giggled before replying, "Everywhere and nowhere." Troubling your parents never got old.

"Stop putting forward riddles, we are not in a fantasy adventure movie." Your mom complained.

"Sorry. Sorry Mom, dad, meet J.A.R.V.I.S. He is an AI that operates the whole tower, literally. If you want to know anything, just ask him. Tony created him. That man is such a genius."

Your dad almost rolled his eyes. "Why couldn't he just hire a human to work for him, just like normal people do?"

You sighed, just hoping that the day goes smoothly.

You couldn't be more wrong.

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"And this room is the briefing room." You opened the door to let your parents in but they just looked around from the doorway.

You had just started showing your parents around the compound, readying yourself for the inevitable. The whole team was pretty excited about meeting your parents and you knew sooner than later that someone will run into you.

The inevitable happened as soon as you stepped into the dining room.

Tony was standing there, getting his morning cup of coffee and his face told you he hadn't slept very well last night. Ever since he picked up the mission to update the compound's security system last month, he had hardly been sleeping. You were worried about him.

"Tony?" You said in a soft voice so as to not startle him.

"Oh, hey, kiddo. Awake a little too early today?" He said with a tired smile on his face, taking a jab at the fact that you were definitely not a morning person.

"Are you okay, Tony?"

"Hmm, yeah. Totally." He then looked at your parents who were standing beside you with a scowl on their faces. "Won't you introduce us?"

"Oh, right." A wide grin spread on your face as you turned towards your parents. "Mom, dad. This is Tony. Kind of the co-leader of the group. Tony, these are my parents."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr and Mrs l/n. You have a great daughter."

Your cheeks turned red until your parents began speaking.

"So, he is the guy who has his head so up his arse that he doesn't care about anyone besides himself?" Your dad with a scowl on his face.

You gasped as Tony's eyes widened. "Dad, what are you talking about?"

"He is Stark, right? That's what you said about him after the first day you worked here."

Your eyes widened as your mouth fell open. What was happening? You hadn't even told your parents about your job for the first 6 months. Why were they -

Your eyes frantically searched for Tony's and you felt a slight pain in your chest when you saw how hard he was trying to feign the hurt in his eyes. You needed to set this right. "Tony - "

"Oh, and could you please stop annoying our daughter with all the science and tech talk? That stuff bores the shit out of her." Your mother interrupted you before you could even say anything.

You looked at Tony, desperately trying to explain to him that it wasn't true. You had told your parents how much you loved listening to Tony rambling about his latest creation. You loved how passionate he was about his work. You couldn't imagine your parents using that against you like this.

Before you could say something, Tony spoke, "Oh, I am sorry, I didn't know me talking about what essentially pays your salary irritated you so much." He said with a snarl in his voice that he had never used with you before. Even though the both of you weren't that apart in age, he was like a dad to you and you would never hurt him.

"Tony, it's not what you think." You said, desperately asking him to give you a chance to explain yourself when some more people walked through the door.

You watched as Nat and Wanda entered the kitchen, engrossed in their talk, smiling when they see you.

"Heya, girl"

You internally panic. You didn't know what your parents were up to but this couldn't be nice. You just wanted to take them away from here.

Tony speaks up before you can do anything, "Her parents are here. And they have something very interesting to say. Turns out our goody two shoes has some very different thoughts about us."

"Tony, no. It's not like that. I don't know why - "

"Hey, let me guess who are these two." Your mother exclaimed, conveniently shutting you up.

Wanda looked between you and Tony in confusion before smiling at your parents. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. Y/n talks a lot about you."

Your mom looked her up and down before saying with disdain in her voice, "Redhead. A pretty face. You must be the witch."

Wanda's smile wavered but she didn't let her discomfort show.

"You're the one who is so desperate for love that she is dating a toaster."

Wanda gasped as her smile fell. She looked at you, confused and hurt.

"Mom, what are you - "

"That's what you told us, princess. That she is dating a toaster. What's its name again? Vi - Vis.." "Vision. His name is Vision and he is NOT a toaster." Wanda then looked dead into your eyes. "But it's good to know that that's what you think, y/n."

You shook your head frantically. "No, no, Wan. It's not like that. You know that's not true. I would never say that."

Wanda's eyes didn't waver and dread filled you. Your friends were not trusting you.

"What does she say about me?" Nat spoke up. She asked as if she couldn't care less but being her best friend for almost a year now, you could read it in her eyes that she was almost as afraid of the answer as you were.

"You're the black widow, right?" Your father questioned.

Your mother spoke up without waiting for a reply, "You are the useless one. No, like, really, the three of us always wonder, why are you even a part of the group? There are supersoldiers in here, witches and literal gods, what do you do? Throw some punches? Kicks?"

"Gods. That reminds me, where are the self-proclaimed gods/aliens of yours?" Your dad snickered, amused.

"Which one?" Your mom questioned in reply. "The doofus or the monster which can never be trusted?"

You had had enough. You exclaimed, "Okay, guys. Enough. Stop talking."

Your dad smirked. The audacity. "Come on, princess. Aren't you tired of pretending? Don't you want your friends to know what you actually think about them?"

You opened your mouth to tell them that whatever they were saying was as far from the truth as it could get when everybody in the kitchen heard footsteps approaching.

You heard Steve before you saw him, "Who thinks about what?" He asked, genuinely curious.

Your heart started beating frantically when you realized he wasn't alone. Sam and Bucky had entered the kitchen with him. But unlike the other times, your heart was beating with fear. This couldn't be happening. No, no.

"Y/n's parents are here. They were telling us all the great stuff she says about us to them." Wanda said with pure disgust in her voice. You had never seen her this mad.

"Guys, trust me. It's not - " "Come on, y/n. Let them speak." Sam said before turning towards your parents. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Mr and Mrs l/n."

Your father rolled his eyes before saying, "You're the one who got kicked out of the Air Force and then kissed Captain America's arse for a job."

Sam's jaw dropped but before he could say anything your mom replied, "No, honey. Y/n told us it was that Ant-man."

Your dad shook his head. "No, no. Antman is the one who went to jail. He is Falcon."

You were seeing red now. You knew that your parents were a little too overprotective of you and hence didn't like you taking this job. But you thought meeting your friends and realizing how caring and nice everybody was would change their minds. You never thought that they would ever do this to you.

You desperately wanted to explain yourself. To tell your friends that this was all a lie but you couldn't. You could see it in their eyes that they already hated you. And with your parents standing right there, you knew it would be impossible to give them. Maybe you could talk to them after your parents left. You just hoped they would give you a chance to explain yourself.

When your dad's eyes landed on Bucky, panic swelled inside you. Nononono.

"Oh, and you must be the winter soldier. That metal arm makes it pretty obvious though." Your dad said as he pointed towards Bucky's left side with pure disgust in his eyes as if it was the most horrifying thing he had ever seen.

Tears welled in your eyes as you saw how Bucky pulled his sleeves to cover more of his arm and blocked it from view.

"Do you have any idea how difficult you make it for people to work in this compound? Y/n complains to us how she has to walk on eggshells around you, scared that anytime you would get back to being the assassin that you have always been." Your mother uttered the words with a permanent frown on her face.

"But can you blame her though? You can not just kill hundreds of people and live freely, pretending to be a hero."

"Enough." You shouted. You couldn't take it anymore and your parents had gone too far.

You looked at Bucky, about to explain to him that none of it was true. That you were never scared of him. Not even for a second. Because you loved him. Since the day you had met him, your heart had held nothing but love for him.

But the look that you saw in his eyes made you stop in your tracks. He wasn't looking at you with hate or anger. No, it was much worse. He looked hurt. As if someone had pulled his heart out of his chest and stomped on it. You couldn't help but notice that his eyes held a little bit of understanding too as if he didn't blame you for thinking that way.

Your chest hurt and you wanted nothing more than to reach out to him.

"Wow. That - that was." Steve broke the silence, but it was the first time you had seen him out of words. "Is that really what you think about us, y/n?"

"No, no, Steve, None of it is true."

"Come on, princess. You don't have to put up a facade anymore. No more pretense."

"Stop it." You shouted at your parents. This was the first time you had ever raised your voice at them, but you couldn't care less. They were ruining everything.

"Guys, you need to trust me. Please." You looked at everybody, begging them with your eyes and words to just trust you.

"I don't understand. Why did you pretend to be our friend for so long? Why pretend to care when that's what you really think?" Wanda spoke, bewildered.

"No, no. That's not - " You spoke, tears at the brim of your eyes. This couldn't be happening.

"For the money, of course. Come on, why would someone live in the most dangerous place on earth if not for a buttload of money?" Your dad said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"No, no, no, please. You guys have to trust me, please." You looked around at everybody, frantically searching for even a hint that everything was not ever. That they could trust you. But all you got was hurt faces and built-up walls.

"Why are you doing this to me?" You shout at your parents. You were extremely close to sliding on the floor and crying your heart out.

"We are trying to help you, princess. We are freeing you." Your mom said with a smug expression.

"You don't have to do that anymore," Tony spoke and all the eyes in the room looked at him. Hope swelled in your chest.

"You don't have to stay here and pretend to like us. I really really want to fire you but you know too much and your statistical skills are too good to be wasted. So, you will be transferred. Somewhere far from us where we don't ever have to see your face." Tony spoke with a sense of finality in his voice and your heart broke into a hundred pieces.

You looked at your feet and swallowed the lump in your throat before looking at him and whispering, "You don't have to do that." You then turned and looked into the blues of Bucky's eyes which you were so familiar with and all you could do was whisper, "I am sorry."

You didn't wait for anybody's response before walking out and towards your room.

There was nothing that you could do anymore.

You were not going to take that transfer.

This job was never about money to you. You had found a family here, and you loved them with everything you had. But it still wasn't enough for them to trust you.

You cried and cried and cried till you had no more tears to let go before getting up and packing your bag.

You had to leave. You couldn't face them again.

There was only one thing left to do.

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The compound was silent.

It was as if nobody even lived here anymore.

Everybody sat at the dining table staring at the food in front of them, nobody taking a bite.

It was as if a part of them was missing. As if the one thread that had bound them together was somehow suddenly torn apart.

There was an unspoken agreement between them. Nobody would talk about what had happened earlier that day. The wound was too fresh to be confronted.

Nobody knew where you were right now. But everybody just assumed that you were in your room.

Steve was very close to barging into your room and bringing you to the dining table. He couldn't count the number of times he had told you that you shouldn't talk while eating and even after choking on your food twice, you hadn't listened to him and Steve was glad. There was nothing he wouldn't give right now to bring back the lively chatter that had always surrounded the dining table. But he had to remind himself that everything he had thought was a lie, a pretense.

Tony was angry. He was seething. He had cared for you like you were his own daughter and you had thrown all of that into a drain.

Wanda just wanted to know how you were so good at acting. How you could pretend to be her best friend when you hated her all along?

But Bucky just wanted to know one thing - why. He didn't blame you for thinking that way about him. You weren't the only one who did. But he wanted to know why you would pretend to be his friend, to care about him when you thought him to be a monster. Why did you comfort him after all those panic attacks and nightmares telling him it wasn't his fault when you blamed him for every single thing? Why had you let him fall in love with you if you couldn't even stand him? You had to know that it would leave him devastated. He didn't blame you for hating him, but how was he supposed to live without your light now? Especially when he knew it was never for him?

Nat couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't just let everyone swallow themselves in silence for a person who never even cared about them in the first place. She harshly got up before walking towards the living room for a bottle of wine.

She shook her head when the memories of all of you hanging out at the same place plagued her mind.

As she walked past the bookshelf, she noticed something which had never been there before.

She frowned as she walked towards it to realize that it was a pen drive. She slowly picked it up to find a note attached to it which just read, "Sorry".

She was so engrossed that she didn't hear footsteps approaching until a hand took the pen drive from her. She looked up to realize Tony was looking at the drive intently as if scanning it with his eyes.

"What's this?" He asked, confused.

"No idea. Found it on the bookshelf."

Tony read the note and recognized the handwriting almost instantly. "It's y/n's."

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*

Everybody sat in the living room staring intently at the screen before them.

Tony had assembled everybody and they had all agreed to watch the pen drive once. Maybe it would answer their questions. Maybe it was just an old pen drive and had to do nothing with what had happened today but they had to know.

The system finally finished scanning the drive after what felt like a lifetime and your face flashed on the screen.

Your tears-stained cheeks and red, swollen eyes, told them that the video was indeed today's.

"Hey, guys." You sounded broken and defeated.

"I am not even sure that you are going to watch this." You let out a sad chuckle.

"But I just needed to say this 'cause it feels like if I don't, it will swallow me whole. And you guys deserve to know the truth, too."

"I just - I want you all to know that all that you heard today, none of it was true. Not even a single word of it. And I need you guys to know this." You looked directly into the camera as if begging them to trust you and nobody dared to move.

"I - I don't know why my parents did what they did. I have no idea. I can tell myself that they were trying to protect me, but who am I trying to convince? 'Cause, you don't protect someone by taking away the best thing that ever happened to them." You sniffled, rubbing your palms on your face to wipe off the tears.

"And that is what this team was for me. This job, this team, was the best thing that ever happened to me. And it was never because of the money or the luxuries of living in the tower, it was you guys. You were a family I found in a city I knew nothing about. And that was what mattered to me."

Tony wanted to shut the video off, to tell everybody that maybe you were lying here too, pretending, but he knew it wasn't true. Your eyes shone with guilt and desperation and eyes never lie.

The video continued. "And maybe you are not even watching this video. Maybe you will never know how I actually felt and will hate me forever, but if there is even a slight chance that you are watching this, and there is a small part of you that can trust me, I want you to know what I actually think about you.

Tony, you were like a dad to me. You always looked out for me and were so damn concerned about me the whole time and I can't thank you enough. Thank you for always looking out for me and I never for a second got annoyed by you talking about tech, you might not know this but your eyes shine brighter when you are talking about your creations and I would never get tired of that. The only complaint I had for you is that you need to take care of yourself more. Stop sleeping in your lab and eating shawarma all the time in the name of food, it's not healthy. Take care of yourself, Tony, 'cause there are some people who will always need you."

Tony looked away, blinking hard so as to not let the tears roll down his cheeks. All the times when you brought him food in his lab because he hadn't left his spot for hours and then you forced him to finish it all, you didn't do it as a pretense, you did it because you genuinely cared about him.

"Nat, you're the bravest and the most badass person I know. Don't tell anyone, but you are my favorite fighter. I admire you so damn much. Who cares that you can't lift things with your mind or fly? You can kick people's asses without blinking an eye. You inspire me so much."

"Wanda, you and Nat are my best friends and I am so proud of you. After everything you've lost, gathering the courage to love again is the most courageous thing I've ever seen. You and Vis make me believe in love. Hell, I even had a speech ready for your wedding as your bridesmaid." You had a small smile on your face as if remembering something, "Now that I am not going to be there anymore, Nat, I am going to ask you to give a great speech from my side too. I know you are not a very emotion-oriented person, but please try. 'Cause Wanda deserves nothing but the best."

Wanda sniffed audibly and Nat kept a hand on her shoulder.

"Thor, prince of Asgard, Son of Odin." You said in the voice that Thor had taught you to intimate a long time ago and chuckled. "I know you are the one who stole all my pop tarts." As Thor's eyes widened, the video continued, "Don't act surprised. Why do you think I never changed the place of keeping my pop tarts even after they went missing every single week? I am not upset, nope. I don't even like those that much. I just need you to know that I won't be there to keep those tarts there. Ask J.A.R.V.I.S., he knows where I brought them from. He will tell you."

"Sam." Sam looked up from his spot as he heard his name. "I am a little upset with you. You never let me use red wig." You pouted and Sam chuckled. "But you do know that you are the funniest, smartest, and one of the most deserving people to be on the team, right? Hell, bringing you to the team was the best decision Steve ever made."

You stopped for a moment looking down at your feet, when you breathed, "Bucky." Your voice was much softer now as if his name was a prayer.

Bucky looked up into the camera, his heart beating a mile per minute. If this was all a lie too, he didn't want to know what you had to say. Even if it was actually how you felt, he wasn't sure he was ready for what you were going to say.

"I - " You stopped and took a deep breath. You looked vulnerable as if you were apart to lay your soul bare in front of you. "Bucky, I just - Whatever you heard today, it is not true. None of it. Since the day I met you, I have never been scared of you. Not for a single second. You know I don't blame you for anything that Hydra did, you have to know. I don't think you were a monster. I think you are the sweetest, kindest and bravest person I know. I wasn't lying when I told you that I trusted you with my life. I trust you, I care about you, and I - "

Bucky's breath hitched in his throat as you suddenly stopped.

"Well, there is a major chance that you're not even watching this, so .. why not? It's not like I am ever going to get a chance to say it to you. So, here it is -

I love you, Bucky. I am in love with you. I have been for a very long time now. I could tell myself that it was just a small crush and it would go away sooner or later, but who am I kidding? I want to spend every single moment of my day with you. You're the first thought that comes to my mind when I wake up and my last memory before I fall asleep. When you are around, I can't stop looking at you and when you are not, all I want to do is look at you. I know that you might never feel this way about me, especially after today, but I just had to say it once."

You took a deep breath before speaking with finality in your voice, "I just hope that one day you guys will know that it wasn't a pretense. That this team was everything to me. I found a family, a place to call home, I found love. I hope that one day you will be able to forgive me."

The video stopped and everybody bowed their heads down while Bucky just stared at the screen desperately, as if you would walk out of it.

You loved him.

You wanted to be with him and god if that thought alone wasn't the best thing that had ever happened to him. He didn't think you could love him. He had accepted the fact that he was destined to love you from afar, a love that you would never know about.

But you felt the same. He didn't have to watch you fall in love with someone else and get your happily ever after, because you wanted that to be him.

You could be his happily ever after.

Before he could let himself be hopeful, realization struck him and left him breathless.

You had said that you would never get the chance to say it to him personally. The things that you had said, the finality in your voice, it had all sounded like a ... goodbye.

He stood up abruptly, only to realize that all the eyes were on him.

Some were filled with tears, others were trying really hard to keep their emotions in check. No, no, this couldn't be. How was he supposed to live without you now that he knew that you loved him too?

Without muttering a word to anybody, he rushed out of the room, through the corridor, and towards your room. You couldn't have gone yet. No, no, he would beg you to stay, get on his knees and ask you to forgive him.

He stood outside your door for a moment, taking a deep breath, mentally preparing himself.

He brought his hand to knock on your door, only to realize that it wasn't locked.

With bated breath, he pushed the door open.

It was vacant. Everything that you had put in to make it a home, was gone.

You were gone.

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*

The whole team stood in the living room, waiting.

Bucky walked in, his head shaking and arms trembling.

Nobody uttered a word as they waited for him to give words to the inevitable. He looked up, tears brimming his eyes as he whispered, "She is gone."

Everybody gasped as guilt filled them.

Only if they had trusted you.

"No, no. We cannot give up. We need to find her. I am going to find her. We cannot give up this easily." Bucky said, praying that he was right, that not everything was lost. There was still hope. There had to be.

"He is right. We can't just let her go." Wanda said, tears straining her cheeks. "There has to be a way." Sam agreed.

Tony suddenly lightened up as he took out his tablet. "We can track her. If she hasn't switched off her phone, we can find her exact location." He had enabled a tracking sensor in everyone's phone some time ago. He remembered the way you had pouted and teased him that it was an invasion of privacy, but had finally let him install it nonetheless.

He let out a sigh of relief when he realized he could still check the location of his phone. "She is heading towards the airport."

Dread filled everybody as Tony's words sank in. You were leaving. Forever.

"She is in a cab right now. I can figure out its number, but it might be too late."

"I have to go," Bucky exclaimed. "I am not going to let her go. No. I need to find her." He looked around, ready to fight anyone who came in his way.

But everybody just gave him a reassuring look as Steve whispered, "Go, get the girl, Buck."

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧✧༝┉˚*

You looked through the window as the city lights bristled by.

Your cheeks were still stained with tears as you left behind the place you had called home.

But there was no other option. Your parents had left you with no other choice.

It hurt that they had actually been successful in their mind games, but there was nothing you could do. Your parents had taken from you, the best part of your life.

You were going to miss the city, the team, and your friends, but there was one person you were going to miss the most.

Leaving him was like leaving a part of your behind and you knew that Bucky Barnes was always going to have a piece of your heart, even if he didn't know about it.

You swallowed the lump in your throat as the cab came to an abrupt, sudden stop.

The cab driver looked back at you before asking, "Ma'am, are you okay."

You nodded your head before asking, "Are you?" After he nodded, you continued, "What happened?" "A man just rushed his bike past us, way beyond the speeding limit, and then stopped it right before us, in the middle of the bridge."

You frowned as you looked in front of the cab.

Your breath hitched in your throat as you recognized the bike and the man getting down from it.

"Bucky." You breathed before opening the cab door, against the driver's protests, your legs on autopilot.

When your eyes met Bucky's, you could see him visibly relaxing with relief.

"Bucky, what are you - " You exclaimed against the sound of the wind.

He got down from his bike and started walking towards you quickly. "Doll, how could you?"

Your heart skipped a beat at the nickname before you lowered your head. Of course, he hated you after what had happened. He didn't trust you.

You looked up to realize that he was a couple of feet distance from you now. You opened your mouth, apologies about to come tumbling from your lips when you were cut off by him.

You gasped in shock as Bucky closed the little distance between the both of you, pressing his lips to yours, in a gentle, yet desperate kiss, as if he was drowning and only the feeling of your lips could bring him back to the shore.

When the surprise finally washed off, you brought your hands to his chest as his led down to your waist, and you kissed him back. You didn't understand what was happening. But if it was goodbye, you wanted it to last forever.

When the necessity to breathe arose, Bucky pulled back but stood close.

He leaned in and touched your forehead with his before closing his eyes.

You breathed him in. He smelled of fresh coffee and pine. He smelled like home.

"How could you leave me, doll? Without even saying anything. Not even a goodbye?" He tried to be upset with you. But who was he kidding? You could stab him through his chest and he would still thank you.

Tears brimmed your eyes as you took in a deep breath, you wanted to savor this moment. "Buck, I - I am sorry. Whatever my parents said today, it was a lie. A huge lie. I wanted to tell you, but - "

"It's okay, doll. I trust you. But, I - I need to ask you something." He took a deep breath, already dreading your answer to the question he was about to ask. "Did you mean it?"

"Of course, I didn't. None of it. I don't blame you for anything, Bucky. I am not scared of you. I have never been."

"That's not." Bucky closed his eyes shut, praying that he could word his feelings correctly. "We - we saw the video."

Your eyes widened as realization struck you. He knew.

You had stupidly confessed all your feelings on a video. What were you thinking? He would be so embarrassed right now but you couldn't back out now.

"Buck, I - I do love you. That is the truth. But you don't have to say anything. I understand if you don't - "

Before you could finish your sentence, Bucky brought his fingers under your chin to make you look up at him before leaning in to press his lips against yours once again.

Hope swelled in your chest as you brought your arms to encircle his neck and kissed him back.

He pulled away a little too quickly to look up at you with a small smile on his face. The look in his eyes made butterflies erupt in your tummy with a ferocity you had never felt before.

"I love you too, doll. I do. With everything that I have. I love you and I am so so sorry that I didn't give you a chance to explain. I am so sorry that I didn't trust you.

I never told you this because I - I am not good enough for you, doll. I don't deserve you."

You shook your head, about to correct him, when he continued, "And I think I still don't. Being with you puts you in so much danger too, maybe I shouldn't even be with you. But I am tired of pretending that I don't want to. I am tired of pretending like I don't want to spend every single moment for the rest of my life with you. So, if you'll allow me, doll, I'll spend the rest of my life, trying to be the man you can proudly call yours 'cause I love you so damn much."

Tears were now flowing down your cheeks for a completely different reason. You leaned in to kiss him again when the both of you were interrupted by the cab driver shouting from the cab, growing impatient, "Madam, do you want to go or not?"

Bucky looked at you with hopeful eyes and you turned back to yell to the driver, "Never"

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samodivaa · 11 months

Text

Hello! I am new to writing, but I am a Soldat specialist since 2014. Main interest - Asset!Reader x Soldat / Bucky ┊Fav authors - Dostoevsky, Kafka┊23┊

smut - ⁂ ︳angst - ☢ ︳fluff - ☀

Winter Soldier Masterlist

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Impure Thoughts ⁂

Bucky is getting more comfortable with going out without the prosthetic. You are getting a little too comfortable with the idea of using it...as a pleasure tool.

You Are Art ⁂ . ☀

Request: College!Bucky x Artist!Reader where Bucky is a nude model partner for life drawing.

Lust looks pretty on you ⁂ . ☀

One Bed Trope. But he is your crush and his body is too close. He can't tell that you are masturbating, right...?

He has an oral fixation due to his anxiety so you let him suck your big tits ⁂ . ☀ He loves your big thighs so much that he fucks them ⁂ He holds you in a metal chokehold while fucking you from behind ⁂

drool on dog tags ⁂ . ☀

✭Others Inside The Winter Storm ☢ . ☀ (request) Using Bucky's cum as a lip blam Bucky x Reader ⁂ (drabble)

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urdepressedslut · 11 months

Text

Void

♡ Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Hydra!Fem!Reader/The Winter Soldier x Hydra!Fem!Reader

♡ Summary: Working as a nurse at HYDRA, you find yourself intervening when you catch Alexander Pierce striking The Asset. You don’t even know this man, but you can’t just stand and watch him be beat down.

♡ Warnings: violence, angst, mentions of guns, unwanted touching, mentions buckys trauma, poor sweet bucky

You took your place as the caboose in the group of people, lingering behind as you ducked your head, avoiding the judgmental stares from the guards.

Sometimes you wondered if anyone even knew your name. You were practically invisible. You stayed out of everyone’s way, never attempting to make conversation. You learned your place here, you were not to speak out, your thoughts and opinions meaning nothing.

You were only ever useful or needed when The Asset needed to be fixed up. You were efficient in your work, cleaning and stitching wounds with expertise. Despite your shaky hands that came with the pressure and anxiety sometimes, you were good at what you did. But it was rare that anyone ever praised you for your hard work, not that you were ever expecting a thanks, but it would be appreciated.

You were not blind to HYDRA’s motives, but you were also in a dangerous position to speak out. HYDRA had control of your life, you were shackled to them.

You had no family left, only your uncle, who happened to be one of the leaders of HYDRA.

Alexander Pierce.

Although he was your blood, he never felt like family. Treating you like someone under him, ordering you around, forcing you to follow him. It felt fair to not even consider him family, as far as you knew, your family were dead.

“Move it, girl.” One of the guards snapped, noticing your pace slowing while you were stuck in your thoughts.

Speed walking to catch up, you swallowed nervously as you approached closer to your destination.

The sound of commotion could be heard ahead, just outside the room. Your hands were clammy, making it difficult to hold your supplies tightly.

The group separated to the sides, leaving you a cleared path to enter. The sudden attention on you had your heart pounding, your chest rising and falling erratically.

You shuffled from foot to foot, hesitating, frozen in your spot. Your chest started to ache, and you cursed yourself that this wasn’t the time for a panic attack.

“Go now!” The guard closest to your right yelled, making you flinch back.

Bowing your head apologetically, you forced your feet to move into the room. The atmosphere immediately tense, the air thick with machinery fumes. It was when you entered the room completely, you allowed yourself to look up. Taking in the scrawny handlers scattered around the room, their expressions blown in fear. Armed guards fenced the room, their weapons pointed at the defensive man in the middle. The Asset.

You felt like you had entered at the wrong time, things seeming to be a tiny bit chaotic.

Your gaze fell upon the tense man, his muscles flexing with what seemed like panic. You didn’t know this man very well, only having fixed him once or twice before, but the far away look he always wore, saddened you.

From what you could tell from your time here, was that he was loyal. Never speaking unless asked to, really quick to follow orders. He rarely acted human, and you were beginning to wonder if he even was. He was emotionless, despite his occasional sadness and rage. But it was the slightest ghost of emotion, that you’d miss if you blinked.

You couldn’t help yourself from feeling bad, the restraints and many guards proving he was to be tamed. Meaning he was probably being kept here against his will. That thought made your stomach twist.

It didn’t surprise you, coming from HYDRA, you knew they were known to take things to drastic measures. Willing to do whatever it takes. You felt sick to even lift a hand in helping them, but again, you didn’t really have a choice. Either help stitch a few wounds or die a painful death. Or worse, become a robot like The Asset, being controlled by HYDRA’s hands.

Scanning his body, you didn’t seem to find any open wounds. A crease formed in between your brows, wondering why you were here if there wasn’t any wound for you to fix.

Turning to the closest guard, you anxiously met their hardened gaze.

“Excuse me… What am I supposed to—”

“Calm him down.” The guard snapped, focusing his glare back on The Asset.

You furrowed your brows even more, you were a nurse, not a counselor.

“I don’t know what you—”

“Calm. Him. Down.” The guard spat, readjusting his aim of the gun of you, “Or I’ll shoot you.”

The end of the gun being pointed at you was intimidating, the threat looming in the air, and you were confident that the guard was not bluffing. Swallowing thickly, you moved your numb feet, placing your stuff down on the table.

Side eyeing The Asset, you walked in front of him, watching his empty gaze look right through you. You didn’t know how you should approach him, cursing the guards for throwing you into this so suddenly.

He was being treated like a threat, and you found it funny that you felt threatened by everyone else in the room, besides him.

“Um… Hi there,” You started, not receiving any hint that he’d heard you, “I know you’re nervous, but everything will be alright. Just take a deep breath.”

You heard guards chuckling, giggling at your weak attempts at consoling the man. You felt self conscious, embarrassed by the way they stared down at you.

You couldn’t help but feel terrible for lying to this man. How was it right for you to assure him everything’s fine, when it was far from it?

“I need you to take a deep breath, please?” You said softly, your words coming out slightly desperate.

It was a split second, but the man’s eyes had snapped to yours, confusion painted in his orbs. His muscles relaxed only slightly, and before you could say anymore, Alexander Pierce himself was striding into the room.

“Step away.” Pierce demanded, motioning to a guard when you weren’t fast enough. You were grabbed harshly, feeling yourself get yanked back to the guards chest.

You immediately felt uncomfortable in the guards tight hold, wiggling to create some distance.

“Don’t you fucking move.” The guard spat into your ear, making you halt your movements and shiver in fear.

You watched Pierce examine The Asset, repeating his question when he hadn’t responded. Pierce suddenly cranked his hand back, backhanding The Asset, his head jolting harshly to the side.

You winced hearing the loud smack, you felt angered for this man. Hating the way they treated him like a caged animal, abusing him for their needs. You couldn’t just stand aside and watch this happen.

Ripping yourself out of the guards hold, you walked up to Pierce, chest puffed out in attempt to look confident.

“Stop this! He didn’t do anything wrong!” You told him, your voice the loudest it had ever been.

Pierce glanced over to you, entertained by your attempt to protect The Asset.

“I wasn’t aware that you were in charge?” He asked you, not giving you a chance to speak, “That’s right, you’re not. Who do you think you are, to think you have a place to speak to me?”

You scrunched your face in frustration and disgust, hearing the last family member you had say such things, cutting you deep.

“I’m your niece.” You whispered weakly.

“You’re nothing to me. Just a pathetic nurse we keep around. Do not forget that you are expendable.” He stated so calmly, making your eyes water from the humiliation.

Staying silent, you felt defeated, staring at the ground. Pierce scoffed, turning towards the scrawny man behind The Asset.

“Wipe him.” Pierce commanded.

Your eyes shot up at those words, no stranger to what would come from that torturous machine. The horrific screams that plagued your nightmares, echoing down the halls from this very room.

“No!” You shouted, causing everyone to stop what they were doing and stare at you, “I haven’t stitched his wound yet.”

Pierce squinted his eyes, studying your gaze. He walked closer, invading your personal space, grabbing you by the collar of your uniform.

“I don’t care what you do, just do it quick and leave.” He whispered venomously, his eyes glaring into yours. You could almost see his orbs turn red with fury.

With a shove, he pushed you away, causing you to catch yourself on stumbling feet.

Thankful that he was too busy to care about your lie, he walked out of the room. All the guards but one following him, leaving you with the one guard. The scrawny handlers stepped into another room, waiting for you to finish so they could wipe The Asset.

You watched the man carefully, acknowledging his beaten down expression. His eyes empty and haunting.

The guard walked up to you, shoving you forward with a little too much force, causing you to fall on your hands and knees.

“Hurry it up!” The guard yelled, raising his gun, training it on you.

You huffed, ignoring the throbbing in your hands and knees for now. Standing up, you turned and faced the guard.

“I need to be alone with him.” You said softly, earning a laugh from the guard.

“Yeah right, now shut the fuck up and start.” He spat.

“I need him calm, and he can’t calm down with you in here.” You told him, yours hand motioning to the gun in his hands.

“Why would I listen to you?”

“Because if you were smart, you’d leave and let me do my work. For your sake, if Pierce comes back and finds The Asset not taken care of… He won’t be happy.” You threatened, the guard surprisingly shutting up.

Sending you another deathly glare, the guard walked out of the room, slamming the door on the way out.

With him gone, it was just you and The Asset, and for some reason you felt like you could breathe fully. You felt like you weren’t being watched, your shoulders relaxing from being so tense.

“I’m not hurt.” A soft voice sounded, your eyes glancing up to the man.

His voice had startled you, you weren’t expecting this muscled, intimidating looking man to have such a gentle voice.

You looked at him, giving him a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes.

“I know, I just… I just wanted you to have some time alone for a little bit. I’m sorry.” You explained, keeping your voice quiet.

Meanwhile, Bucky was confused on why you would do such a thing. Kindness was foreign to him, and he wasn’t expecting it to come from anyone from HYDRA. Looking closely at you, he wondered why you were in a place like this to begin with. You didn’t seem to fit in.

“I wish I could run away from here.” You whispered out loud, feeling comfortable with him, not worried about him judging you.

All you received was a grunt in response. The two of you sat in silence, neither bothering to create conversation. In a way the two just enjoyed each other’s company.

After a while, you were surprised to hear the man’s gentle voice again.

“I wish I could too.” He whispered.

“Wish you could what?” You had forgotten what you were talking about before, losing yourself in the comfortable silence you had both found.

The man held your eyes in a desperate gaze, almost as if he were pleading for help.

“Run away.”

A/N: i just realized most of my work is angsty and depressing and well 🥴 that pretty much explains me lol. this idea came to me while i was eating lunch today, let me know what you think🤍

#reader insert #light angst #fluff #marvel cinematic universe #marvel imagines #buckybarnes #oneshot #the winter soldier #imagine #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x y/n #the winter solider x reader #hydra marvel #bucky barnes x hydra!reader

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somethingeden · 5 months

Text

The Hurtful Truth

Summary: Y/n is fed up with trying to make her lover, Bucky, remember her. So, after a failed mission he goes to check on her and confronts her on her behaviour.

Warnings: Swearing, un-detailed violence??

Word count: 380 words (sorry I will do more words in the future).

★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★

The mission was going horrible. It was supposed to be simple, get in and get out with the captives. But no, you just had to fuck it up. You just had to trip over a wire that was where you were hiding. You just had to get bloody caught. Because of that, all the captives were killed on the spot as it turns out, they were just bait.

“Y/n! on your left!” Your brother, Steve yells as you kick a HYDRA Agent away. You turn sharply around to face the so-called agent that your brother called to you but then you get flung across the grass field towards a tree. Your back erupts in pain as your back hits the tree, so you find yourself crumbled on the ground. You can only hear ringing in your ears as you groan.

Tears stream down your cheeks as you slowly heave yourself off the ground. Stumbling forward you soon collapse back onto the ground. The last thing you witness is Wanda sprinting towards you while her lips move but all you hear is still the ringing of a bell, before your eyes flutter close into darkness.

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔

Your eyes slowly but gradually open but you find your lips curl up into a scowl as the lights blind you. Wincing as you turn your eyes to the right you find your brother impatiently seated on a chair. “Y/n. You are awake”, Steve grins.

Your head tilts to the side as you find a man standing at the doorway. “Jamie?” Your throat croaks out as it demands for rest.

“Hello doll” Bucky answers and pushes off the wall to her side. He glances at her blonde brother and nods slightly. Steve then plants his lips on my forehead before walking out of the room. “Doll, what happened?”

“What do you mean? Do you mean the mission?” You flinch as you recount the memories of it. “So many people…. So many people lost their lives… because I fucked up”

“What happened, happened. You didn’t fuck it up okay. I was not asking about the mission.. but your behaviour since we have met. It’s like you know something and are avoiding me!” He softly furrows his brows in frustration and his eyes bore into yours.

#mcu #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #bucky barnes #james barnes #james buchanan barnes #james bucky barnes #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky x reader #bucky x you #winter solider x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky one shot #bucky barnes oneshot #mcu oneshot #somethingeden

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binkszamsstuff · 1 year

Text

Couldn’t help but stare at her photograph

Summary: James let his faults and insecurities take over his life. Saying things he doesn’t mean because he doesn’t deserve them. This costed him the love of his life and his children.

Warnings: like none really? Crying, angst, kissing, Bucky and reader have children, No happy ending!!!

🎞️

For a while I sat there staring at her photograph, For a while I cried and tried not to make a scene.

James watched the old tape of their wedding. The way she looked ingrained into his mind evermore. How he sore to any and everything that he would spend the rest of his life loving her. That’s the only promise he kept out of all of them.

There in the small coffee shop he watched crying as his y/n and their children sit at a table smiling and talking. He tried not to make a scene.

There was a time when we were young I used to make her laugh. But life is long, my love has gone away from me, gone away from me, gone away from me

“Ew James stop! No..no don’t you dare put that on meeee!” James chased her around the island in their home with raw cookie dough, trying to smear it on her. He was shirtless just in some sweatpants, she was in his shirt.

“Come on baby come give me a kiss” he said playfully.

“If I walk over there and give you a kiss promise you won’t get that on me?” She asked hesitantly

“Yes, yes I promise!” He laughed. She slowly made her way to him like a bunny trying to approach a wolf. He had his arms out waiting for her smiling like a fool. Drunk on love. Once she was in his arms, he held her tight and kissed her. It was warm and comfortable. No lust just pure admiration and love.

Once they broke out of the kiss he rubbed the spatula on her nose.

He broke the promise

“James!” They laughed together

life is long, my love has gone away from me gone away from me, gone away from me. Life is long, my love has gone away from me.

“Why!? James have I done something wrong? Just let me in” she begged

“I can’t do this anymore, the routine and boring life. I have a second chance to live my life! To be free from hydra! And…”

“And you don’t want to spend it with me? Or our children?” Hopelessly. Was how she said it. And when she put it that way James felt guilty.

“I-i yes! Alright!” He took his regret out on her, in anger.

“I can’t fucking stand to be in this house! The mess! The noise! The nothingness! There’s nothing here!” He yelled

“Our kids are here! I’m here! Our family and love and home is here! We built this! I thought you loved us” she cried, sobbed, feeling like her whole life had been ripped apart.

Because…it had.

Lately I can’t seem find myself no sleep at all. Lately I just lie awake and hear and dream of a time when she was mine,felt like I had it all. But life is long, my love has gone away from me.

In different beds, in different houses that are not quite home. The broken couple that is no longer one lies awake. Thinking, missing, and dying for the other. The presence of one another still lingers on the other side of the bed. James sits in a half empty house. His kids rooms all cleared out, nothing but some left toys they didn’t want anymore. The other side of the closet, bathroom,and bedroom are still ‘moms side’ James in his heart is still married.

Y/n even though in a new house still has an empty space in the bathroom, closet, and bedroom, and her heart. Her stuff on right his on the left, but now she just has a half empty everything. She still makes room for him even though he is not there.

Gone away from me, gone away from me, gone away from me. Life is long, my love has gone away from me.

He didn’t want the endless hookups or a new woman every night like he once told her. He wanted what he used to have, what has left him. He pushed her away because of his insecurities. His arm, his age, his past, his ability to be a good father which he used to be. The kids were still young. Cecily and grant only 6 and 8, could he make it up them? Make it up to her?

Gone away from me. Life is long, my love has gone away from me. Yesterday is gone. Yesterday is dead. Get it through your head and walk away. Yesterday is gone ain’t no use of hanging on to her memory that only causes you pain.

“I’m sorry and I love you”

“Please don’t give me false hope. I love you James you’re the love of my life! But you made this decision and I- I don’t know if I could survive another thing like this happening. I’ll miss for the rest of my life.”

“I’ll miss you until the end of time.” He kissed her goodbye one last time before the kids could notice them, the two kids sitting in the car waiting for them to stop talking so they could go get ice cream with their dad.

At least he tried to get his life back after he broke it.

For awhile I sat there staring at her photograph. For awhile I cried and tried not to make a scene. There was a time when we were young I used to make her laugh. But life is long, my love has gone away from me.

🎞️

He sat and watched her marry a new man. One who could hold and keep his promises. And not let insecurities get in the way of his love and family. For this was James’ life now. Staring at her photograph.

The end

🥲

#bucky barnes #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes oneshots #marvel #spotify #bucky angst #the winter soldier x reader #winter soldier x reader #james barnes x reader #winter solider fanfiction #sad bucky #sergeant bucky barnes #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes x reader angst #bucky barnes x curvy!reader #marvel fanfiction #marvel angst

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testingthewatersss · 4 months

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18+ MDNI Reader is Tony’s sister, a non-enhanced shield agent who recently resurfaced. One day she says something on the way home from a rogue mission that makes Steve Rodgers realise he's not the only person looking for Sargent Barnes. Chapters 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12

Masterlist

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olive-main · 6 months

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Two Heads of Hydra

Pairing: Bucky Barns x Fem!Reader

Summary: A secret promise they made to each other, vowing to escape HYDRA and leave their lives as weapons behind. Even when they’d wipe Bucky’s mind, Y/N stuck by him, making that promise again and again. Their shared dream of freedom and a life beyond HYDRA had become their driving force.

Wc: 530

My first fanfic….? More of a background for a potential series…? Its simply experimental to get my writing brain working. I have many ideas, but while I’m working on this my requests are open! Don’t be shy and ask away ;)

When Y/N turned 20, Hydra put her on a mission with the infamous Winter Soldier, Bucky Barnes. The two spent their days training together, fighting side by side, and rarely leaving each other's sight. The efficiency with which they operated together swayed Hydra’s decision to keep them as a team.

As their missions continued, Y/N couldn't help but notice the torment that Hydra put Bucky through. Usually it wouldn’t phase her, but with Bucky it was different. It caused an anger to build within her, a protectiveness she couldn't explain but couldn't deny. Bucky had felt the same way about Y/N. Whenever she was hit or “disciplined” by Hydra's members, he would rush to her protection, holding back from killing anyone who laid a hand on Y/N, and she’d reciprocate without hesitation. The punishments for either of their acts or defiance were brutal – brainwiping and torture – so they both decided that it was better to suffer in silence for each other's sake.

In Y/N’s determination to save Bucky from his tormented existence, she found ways to prevent Hydra from wiping his memory. Y/N claimed that he held information for future missions, and surprisingly, it worked, at least for a while. Bucky would always question why she was helping him, he couldn’t believe someone would show him any kindness. Y/N’s response had always been the same, "We only have each other in this hell hole, and I need you conscious for when we escape."

Feelings had begun to grow on both sides. How could they not, but they both knew that acknowledging them was a luxury neither of them could afford. It was the unspoken kindness and care that was shared that kept them going in their prisons, providing a glimmer of hope amidst the despair.

However, when the time came for their escape, Hydra had already grown suspicious of their relationship. They searched Bucky's room and found his journal, a precious collection of his thoughts and memories. Despite the desperation Y/N felt trying to make sure they both got out, it had been too late. Bucky told her to leave, to get out of Hydra and save herself. It was a gut-wrenching decision, and she had no choice but to follow his orders. Y/N knew if she didn’t get out, they’d both be stuck.

Against her heart screaming at her to stay with Bucky, she made her esparce. Determined to keep the promise she had made to Bucky before they parted – to get him out. Before leaving Y/N managed to steal his journal, the only link to his past and his true self. She knew it would be essential for him when the time came to set him free.

Y/N had stepped foot in the outside world, finally free. But her mind was consumed with thoughts of Bucky and the day they’d reunite. She was dedicated to finding a way to rescue him from Hydra’s grasp, and the stolen journal became a symbol of Y/N’s unwavering commitment to the man who had become her partner, her protector, and her silent source of strength in the darkest of times.

Thank you beauties ~Olive ♡

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subwaysurf45 · 1 year

Note

This is based off reality lol but my partner has adhd so sometimes they forget to text me/contact me and it sends me into a shame spiral because my mom used to ignore me for days when I was a kid whenever she felt upset about anything (I mean she still cries it but I am an adult now so I’ve learned to live with it) but anyway it really traumatized me because now when people g hours without responding I immediately assume it was my fault and I dive into fix it mode (even if I did nothing wrong). So idk maybe you could do something where Bucky forgets to text reader about something and reader immediately panics and freaks out because ✨trauma✨

babe, I got you. thank you for the ask, I totally know what you mean. I have many friends who forget to answer my texts and you can't help but think they are mad at you, I fully understand. I hope this does what you are feeling justice.

A/N: there are a few time jumps, I hope it's not too confusing!

So many years ago…

“Mom!” you screamed from outside her door, sitting on your knees while tears streaked down your face.

She had hit the new record for how many days gone without speaking to you; three was the new record. You had forgotten what you had done but your mother definitely did not, she was an elephant with her memory.

You were invisible to her, she walked right past you with nothing to say. There was seemingly nothing you could do except wait it out, but you needed your mother, you wanted her comfort. As hard as you banged against her door, as loud as you screamed, as hard as you cried; she did nothing.

It was always the worst when you accepted defeat and headed off to your room, contemplating how you would punish yourself because obviously you had done something very wrong. There were times when you’d punch your own thigh, maybe scratch along your collar where the skin was thin, anything to continue the punishment.

There had been times when she’d catch the bruises on your legs, immediately giving up the act to get you the bag of frozen peas. Everytime you thought it was over, you really thought she’d continuously love you. But then you’d forget to unpack the dishwasher or say something under your breath after an argument; and the cycle would repeat.

Present Day...

“Bye, love,” you whispered and leaned up to kiss Bucky, wrapping your arms around his neck as he placed his gentle hands on your hips. His roommates were in the next room so you needed to be quick and quiet, no one needed to know about your kissing.

“Text me when you get back to your place, yes?” Bucky muttered before leaning down and pressing a kiss to your collarbone, softly pulling the collar of your shirt with it, pressing a loving kiss to the mark that was blooming.

You grew coy, “of course,” you whispered as you fiddled with the hem of his shirt, “bye,” you said at the last moment with your head still poking in the door. Bucky stood there and waved, when the door closed you headed down to your car and headed home.

There was something about Bucky that was unlike any of the other guys you got close with, there was something so pure about him; even though he wasn’t all the time. On your first date he got you flowers and the next date you got him a bouquet. All the boys in the house laughed but after putting them in a vase and getting into his car you saw a tear roll down his cheek, just one before he swiped it away.

He has one of the flowers pressed and in a frame sitting on his bedside table.

There was an immediate uplift in your life after meeting Bucky, something to look forward to every morning with his texts and always feeling secure. You knew he was your guy, you no longer needed to suss out your mother before calling her to rant. Sometimes she was in a bad mood and would hang up on you, or even worse, sigh loudly until you got the hint. But if Bucky didn’t have time for a phone call he’d stop by on his way home from work or class, just checking in and then either picking you up or stealing a quick kiss before heading home.

You looked after one another because both of you wanted to see each other happy, there was never a moment of malice between you two, just uplifting spirits.

That wasn’t to say you were always perfect, there had been big fights and big emotions. But with Bucky, he sat down and talked about them, maybe after taking a walk so he wouldn’t scream in anger, but there would always be a drive to fix things and not let them linger.

It took many relationships and friendships to realize your mother did a number on you, what you thought was normal raised a few brows; especially Bucky.

“Babe,” Bucky said in his bed, sitting up against the headboard, “that’s fine,” he patted your butt. You were laying on your stomach and trying not to look at him.

“But you…” you sighed, “we were-...” you sighed again.

Bucky leaned over so you had to look at him, “I was in the mood last night- both of us were -and we had fun, even though I’m fine with something doesn’t mean you have to be as well.” it didn’t look like you believed him, Bucky chuckled and laid right behind you, “I don’t know what it’s like to be a woman and have period sex, babe, I don’t,” you cracked a smile, “just because I offer to lay down a towel doesn’t mean you have to agree, alright?”

“But I feel bad,” you whispered, “but I also don’t like how messy it gets and I was tired because my iron level drops so bad and-”

“And there’s our answer,” Bucky giggled, “remember: we both have to agree, don’t just follow along, alright?”

“Sure,” you whispered. Bucky obviously didn’t think that was good enough, so he tickled you until you were screaming in agreement, the most enthusiastic alright.

When you got home you trudged up the stairs and laid on your bed, sending Bucky a text that you got home.

You: got home perfectly fine, I did in fact almost hit a bunny but it ran out of the way

Bucky: seriously, you gotta be more alert

You: I know I was paying attention but it just came out of nowhere

Fixing your pillow, you sat up and stared at your phone. The typing bubble hadn’t even popped up yet, you needed him to know you were driving safe. With the extra time now you re-read his text, you immediately read it like he was chastising you. Giving you pointers because he felt you were a bad driver.

You wanted him to answer, so he knew you knew you needed to be safe. As you sat there the gears in your brain began to spin, you shouldn’t be this tied to your phone, it’s unhealthy. Don’t be a clingy girlfriend, he’s not actually mad at you.

You began to type again: babe? But you quickly deleted it.

You sat for a moment: did I do something? That was too pathetic.

Maybe a different angle: I bet that bunny is off with its family right now, having the time of its life. But even that was a little much, you could easily come across as rude.

Instead you placed your phone to the side and tried to think back, was there something you did that pissed him off? Maybe he was just annoyed with something else and took it out on you. You could barely sit with yourself, this needed to get fixed. You couldn’t leave him mad at you for too long, he’d leave you.

The thing about your mother was, she would never abandon her kid. But with Bucky, you’re just some girlfriend, easily disposable.

*****

Bucky smiled down at his phone, looking at the text you sent him. “Gotta love her,” he whispered to himself as he sat on the couch, before he could begin to type Sam poked his head in the backyard.

“Hey, need you to help with the barbeque,” Sam waved him outside.

Bucky threw his phone beside him on the couch, “who’s grilling tonight?”

“You,” Sam smirked, “you always do them so well."

Steve was already out there, there was something wrong with the propane tank. All three of them used google and youtube to figure out why the tank wasn’t fitting in the BBQ, they had the same tank as last time but something wasn’t connecting.

“There isn’t even a hiss when you start it up,” Bucky said as he fiddled with the switch, “that’s so weird, man,” Bucky scratched the side of his head.

“I’m so fucking hungry,” Sam muttered to himself, “if we don’t get this figured out soon, I’m fucking ordering in again and I don’t care how much it costs.”

“We’ll figure it out,” Steve nodded as he crouched down to try and come up with a solution.

Though it took a while, they managed to hook up the new tank all by themselves. Bucky now stood by the grill, one hand on the bar on the lid, and watched the timer hit zero. The smell was amazing when he opened the top, feeling the hot steam escape after building up. Steve and Sam were inside, cutting up tomatoes and other toppings to put on their burgers.

“Hey, bud,” Sam called from the screen door, “your girl is blowing up your phone.”

Bucky turned around, “pass it over,” he flipped the last patty and walked over. Immediately, his heart sank as he saw the spammed texts and calls that were coming from you. The most recent text covered the others on his lock screen: I don’t know what I did but I’m sorry I made you upset.

“What?” he whispered to himself, clicking on the notification to see the others in their text chain.

You: Babe?

You: the bunny is okay and so am I

You: are you mad?

You: I know you think this is so pathetic but the text you sent sounded like you were mad and I want things to be okay if your mad but also I’m freaking out over nothing because you probably aren’t

You: right?

You: please pick up the phone

You: Bucky I’m losing my fucking mind, please don’t shut me out if you’re upset, please

You: please

You: okay

You: I don’t know what I did but I’m sorry I made you upset.

Before Bucky could do anything, he was frozen as he stared at the typing bubble that popped up. When the text came through his heart cracked to pieces, it felt like he was dying.

You: I’ve been bad and I deserve it

“Boys!” Bucky called from outside, Sam and Steve both ran out. “Something wrong with y/n, I need to go to her house, I’m sorry, someone’s gotta watch this right now.”

“What’s wrong?” Steve had never seen Bucky more stressed out in his life, watching as he basically tugged his hair out.

“She’s-” Bucky held out his phone, “look at this.”

Sam was the one to take the phone, “dude,” he looked up at Bucky, “you sounded mad at the last text you sent, the ‘seriously’ doesn’t help and then-”

“Holy shit,” Bucky snatched the phone from Sam’s hands and ran to the door to get into the backyard from the side of the house, fishing for keys as he got to his truck.

You sat on the edge of your bed, Bucky beside you. “you-I don’t want you to meet my mom.”

“Why?” Bucky rubbed your back, you looked so sad as you sat beside him, rubbing your wrist raw with anxiety. “I’m sure she’s not as bad as you think.”

“No,” you shook your head, “she just messed me up,” you looked up at Bucky who was shaking his head, silently saying you aren’t messed up. “She would ignore me for days on end, I wouldn’t know if I was getting fed or dropped off at school somedays, and I was like seven. I-” you choked on your words, leaning into Bucky’s side as he kissed the top of your head, “I just always assume people are always mad at me- especially if I get ignored because I’m so used to it.”

“That’s why you don’t want me to meet her?” Bucky whispered.

“She doesn’t deserve to meet you,” you mumbled while you looked at the floor, “she’s in the past and I don’t want my present and past to mix.”

Bucky nodded and planted a few more kisses on the top of your head, “I’ll always be here, I’ll always be in the present.”

No speed limit mattered in this moment, the university kids crossing the street were perfectly timed. It was like the universe knew Bucky needed to get somewhere, all the lights were green and no one got in his way. When he parked in the driveway to your off campus apartment complex he almost forgot to turn off the car, he was sprinting out of there.

He had a key to your place, you had a key to his.

“y/n?” he bursted through the door, not hearing a single sound. He found you in your room, sobbing under the covers, you didn’t even hear him come in. “baby,” he whispered and quickly hugged you from outside the covers, making you jolt away from him. “It’s just me, I’m not mad, I promise, come here.”

“You’re not?” you coughed out, looking over your shoulder at him.

“I was about to text you back and then Sam needed my help with the barbeque and I forgot about it so quickly, you know how I get with that.”

“I do,” you nodded.

“And I was in charge of the burgers so I was outside, away from my phone- jesus, I’m so sorry,” Bucky whispered and got under the covers, “it just slipped my mind, I didn’t mean to give you the silent treatment, I really didn’t.”

“Deep down I knew you were busy but then I just…” you sighed and looked away, “I fed into my thoughts, what I knew since I was a kid: getting ignored is-”

“I know,” Bucky kissed your temple, “don’t feel bad you went back to what you knew, anyone would do that, I’m just so sorry,” he held you tightly, kissing all around your head, “that text meant to be funny but it so wasn’t and I’m so sorry, but I’m not mad- all you need to know is that I’m not mad at all,” he felt you nod, “all one misunderstanding that really hurt you.”

“I forgive you,” you flipped around to face him, “I’m just so mad I let her win again, I thought I was over this.”

“I forgot to text you back for a long time,” Bucky brushed the hair out of your face, “you can only go so long and that’s normal, babe, totally normal.” You used his shirt to wipe the tears off of your face, “you don’t need to feel any shame or any embarrassment, alright?”

“But I do,” the tears came back again but Bucky was quick to soothe them. He held you close and continuously whispered in your ear sweet nothing, making you feel loved. After a while you believed him, he wasn’t mad at you, and you leaned into his touch.

“The only thing you deserve,” Bucky cupped your face to make you look at him, “is to be loved and listened to, alright?”

You nodded, a smile gracing your lips for the first time in what felt like days, “alright.”

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fineprintedsunsets · 9 months

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ᴍɪᴅɴɪɢʜᴛ ᴘʀᴏᴍɪsᴇs

(Part 1 Of "Bucky & Bunny" Mini-Series) | Master-List Link

Synopsis: You met Bucky while delivering something for a friend, and from that night on, he’s regretted it.

Word Count: 3.7k

!Trigger Warnings! -mild non-consensual touching (beginning only). angst. oral (fem receiving). Female reader “you”, with overuse of pet name “bunny”. praise kink. abusive male (not bucko). mentions of alcohol consumption. au. fingering.

ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ :

Manaic- Conan Gray

1:35 ───ㅇ─────3:47

“Hey, doll.” A gruff voice made your heart leap from your chest, a sudden shock rushing through you as you rounded the corner.

You fixed your gaze on the voice, stuttering. “Hey -Uh- You?” The case you were carrying landed on Steve’s dining room table, he had asked you to deliver something to his apartment since he was away on some mission. Steve, however, never mentioned a man, with brown hair, blue eyes, and a metal arm.

He also happened to be shirtless, exposing his bare muscled chest. You adverted your eyes immodestly at seeing his half-naked frame, your eyes falling upon his arm.

“What’s in the case?” The man tipped his chin toward the black box, you only shrugged.

“Steve send ya’?” You nod, suddenly unable to speak words. Who was this man? Should you alert Steve?

“Speak.” He pushed away from the counter his fingers were previously wrapped around, crossing from one room to the next. You had to look up to meet his eyes as he towered over you.

“Yes, who are you again?” You bit, fixed on him. You can smell his scent, his aftershave, his body wash. You rid the thoughts away as you stand your ground.

“Bucky Barnes, Although most know me by The Winter Soldier.” Bucky tossed a smile as he looked down, focusing on your soft features, your doe eyes.

His words had you backing up a few steps, finding it incredibly hard to breath. You had heard Steve talk about him before, and his reputation was anything but clean.

It was bloody.

Bucky’s eyes never left you, he couldn’t help but feel the sliver inside of him, the bit of heart he had- sink into his chest. He hated people's reacations when he had said who he was, most of all yours. For some reason, it had felt more disappointing to see your face fall flat and your breath quicken.

It was more heartbreaking than the others, but the catch? He didn’t know why. He only met you all but 3 minutes ago.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” Bucky’s tone had dropped a few notches as he steps toward you again, Your eyes are kept on him, not allowing them to land anywhere else.

“I should go, Steve just needed me to drop the case off.” You cast your eyes doward, trying to walk past him but Bucky wouldn’t let you. His cold metal fingers met the flesh of your wrist, making you spin around, your eyes wide.

You had dealt with people like him before, monsters. But never has this amount of fear coursed through you. Bucky looked at you, his false fingers clamped hard against your flushed skin. He only wanted to talk, he didn’t mean for you to be scared.

“I just want to talk. I don’t get a lot of company up here.”

You felt his fingers move themselves from your arm, taking the coolness of his touch with him. You were on the fence, this couldn’t be the ruthless winter soldier. He seemed to.. vulnerable. “Who are you?”

“A secret,” Bucky mutters, barely audible.

“What?” You question, craning your neck to hear him better. You feel his breath against the shell of your ear, unaware he had gotten so close. Bucky’s behind you now, back to chest. You wrapped in his scent again as his breath caresses your ear, his lips close enough to bite down if he wanted.

Your whole body was still, maybe out of fear, out of some other emotion you had yet to identify.

“Come on, I can be gentle-” His breath fans to your neck, “Or Rough.” Bucky places a kiss at the side of your throat, smooth and gentle. It’s enough to make you swallow as heat rushes through you. You can feel his muscled chest pushing into your back. Panic starts to rise above all of it though, his metal arm comes around his side, splaying its fingers across your stomach, pulling you into him.

You lose it, you elbow him in the side, making a grunt admit from his mouth, and you spin until your back is against the door. Your breath comes out in heaves, and Bucky’s touch still lingers on you, his scent still filling the air.

“You're a monster. Monsters don’t wield gentle hands.”

“I’m a human being.” Bucky counters, his eyes wide with surprise. He hadn’t meant to touch you like that- especially without your permission. He just wanted to know what you felt like against him, what you tasted like on his lips.

You turned toward the door, your eyes over your shoulder, looking at him, leaving him with six parting words. “Not with that arm your not.”

✪

4 Months Later, New York City

Your life had consisted of partying, avoiding the Avengers, and more partying. It had gone to complete utter shit, not because of anyone in particular. You let it get to its current state.

Tonight though, you were as sober as ever, you went out with Jack and his friends. Which happened to be your first mistake. Jack was known to be quite handy when it came to you. Although you denied liking him romantically multiple times, it had been a while since anyone had touched you the way he touched you.

Even if it was a bit terrifying.

The music drowned out the rest of your thoughts. People throw back shots, clinging glass landing on the hard surface of the bar top. Sober people mixed with drunken ones, and the flashing lights made your head ache.

“Baby, Come dance with me!” Jack, who was well on his way to his fifth drink and quite hammered, shouted toward you. You sighed, knowing full well his words were slurred and if you turned around you’d bet he couldn’t stand on his own two feet.

Turning around in your bar stool, swiveling towards Jack, who was now hovering over you, his breath reeking of alcohol.

He slung a hand around your shoulders, his body weight resting on your bones. “Jack.” You warn, looking into his dim brown eyes.

“Get up, dance, have a drink.” Jack's words were slurred, as he tapped the bar, signaling for the bar tender to pass him another drink, the tall dark man only shook his head.

“Bud, I said another drink for me and the lady.” You shook my head at the bartender, You couldn’t drink, You were your ride home, and Jack has had quite enough.

The shaking of the bartender’s head was not enough, Jack growled, slamming his hand against the bar again. “Jack let's not make a show-”

“Shut up, bitch. Give me another drink, man.”

The words hurt you a little bit, but deep down you know this was the outcome. Jack got angry when he drunk, with in turn caused him to act out. And when he acted out.

It was never good.

People were starting the notice, many were coming to gather around you guys, looking at the commotion. The bartender didn’t seem upset in the slightest, he’s probably due twitched hundreds like Jack before.

“What did you just say?” You turn around at the voice that is right beside you, knowing who it is before you turn around.

Bucky.

You swivel toward him, looking up into his eyes with a pleading face. You haven’t seen him in months, and you intended to keep it that way.

“Don’t.” You manage to growl, fingers gripping the bar top, another trying to get Jack to calm down.

“Let’s go, bunny.” Bucky places three metal fingers on your elbows, tugging gently. You spun around, your eyes shooting him a nasty glare.

“I don’t know you, please leave me alone.” Bucky’s eyes turned for a moment, delving deep into emotion you could not feel.

“You only want one thing from him, and you're not getting it tonight.” His voice is loud above you, people can hear, Jack can hear, except he’s too worried about the bartender denying him drinks. Your suck into Bucky’s pool of heat again, as he keeps his fingers locked onto your elbow.

“You don’t know what I want.” You growl in response, grinding your teeth together. Everything begs you to leave, you don’t want to be here, the music is too loud, and you hate the smell of booze and loud people chattering.

But you couldn’t let Bucky be a lifeline.

“You don’t want to fuck him, bunny.” His voice is low now, only the two of you can hear it. Jack is screaming now, slurring his words, throwing bottles around.

“I can fuck whoever the hell I want.”

“The hell you can.” Bucky protests, gripping you harder, and pulling you from your seat. You want him to take you away, but not with Jack right here-

It's too late though, Jack has already noticed the tall man, with one metal arm holding onto you. “Get off my bitch, what the hell is your problem-”

You cringe at the words, but Bucky is livid, you can feel it, hear it, smell it.

“Bucky-” The words don’t register to him as he lets go of your elbow, grabs Jack by his throat, and throws him into a neighboring wall. People start to film, phones, cameras, oo’s and ahh’s. Some people are running, others are too mortified to move. And Jack barely had his head hanging down, his back slumped against the little bit of wall left.

“Come home with me, bunny.”

“Please” Bucky begs, coming to you again, towering over your small frame. Your You'ree of how tight your dress hugs your body, and how heat pools in your stomach.

“Go away, Bucky.” You manage to get out, even as every string in your heart begged you to go with him, tugging at your soul.

“Please, Let me make that day up to you. At least let me explain.” Bucky captured a loose strand of hair in his fingers, twirling it around his bones before tucking it behind your ear. A simple move like that had your heart fluttering. You could barely make out his features in the darkness of the club, but the flashing lights helped just a bit.

You finally sighed, getting up from your stool, “Okay.”

✪

Bucky lead you to his car, made sure you got in and started to drive. Ten minutes later you were both at his apartment in Central New York, which happened to be a condo. Bucky was doing some avoiding of his own.

You both sit in his dining room chairs, while Bucky gets you a glass of water. Accepting the refreshment was the easiest thing you’ve done today. It was gone in 5 gulps.

Bucky starts, looking at you. “I love him-” “-Steve.” He clarifies, his thumb slides under your palm, his four flesh fingers resting over top your own. A rush of heat shoots through you, a familiar feeling when you're around Bucky. You nodded, signaling for him to continue.

Bucky did, but not before taking a deep breath.

“He kept me locked away in that apartment, I was a secret. He did it for good reason, I could have hurt people, and by that point-”

“Enough damage had already been done.” You finish for him, feeling your heart shatter.

“I hadn’t interacted with anyone in so long, and when I saw you, this beautiful woman who was in Steve’s apartment, I couldn’t control myself.” Beautiful. Bucky called you beautiful. You smiled weakly at him, wishing to control yourself. But everything, leading up to this moment is calling out to you.

You on a path of destruction, Not as long as you destroy it first.

“I’m sorry, bunny. I never met for you to feel the way you did.” You lean in closer, and Buck does it too, almost on impulse. You can see the worry in his eyes, the feelings he wants to hold back.

For you. He doesn’t want to hurt you.

“Bunny, you don’t have to-” Bucky starts, seeing exactly where this is leading. You don’t care though, you’ve left it to boil for four long, excruciating months.

“Just kiss me, Bucky.”

He did, he moved closer to you, capturing your cheek in his warm palm. Heat rushes through you at the intensity of his gaze. Bucky captures your lips with his own, pulling your plump bottom lip between his teeth, sucking on the flesh.

A whine escaped you but was barely audible as he began moving onto you, getting closer and closer as your tongues intertwined, as his metal hand cupped the back of your skull with gentle fingers.

Bucky pulls away, a string of saliva still connecting the two of you, your lips are already sore, but your body is still begging for more of his affection.

“Do you want to do this, Bunny?”

Sex. He means sex. Do you?

“Yes, Bucky. I want nothing more than to have you inside me.” Bucky's eyes flickered, a groan emitting off his lips. You found your smile returning, just the sight of it had you both turned on.

He cups your cheek, half sitting- half standing. His rough flesh grazes your flushed skin, “I don’t want to hurt you.” You can tell Bucky is fighting himself, he wants this more than anything, but the only thing he desires more is your guaranteed safety.

“How about a safe word?” You counter, standing up with him, leaning your head into his open palm.

“Of course, doll.” Bucky’s voice is soft, his eyes even softer as he looks down at you.

You think for a moment, searching your mind for the first word you can come across. “How about, Winter?”

“Sounds perfect.” Bucky’s hovering over you as he nods, connecting your lips again in a hungry kiss. Your body is filled with anticipation, and your core is already buzzing.

“Jump.” He orders, and you do without question. Your lips are still intertwined as Bucky catches you, his hands cupping your ass, supporting you. His warmth embraces you as does his lips.

Everything feels unreal.

Bucky starts walking you both to his bedroom, kissing your neck, your throat, and your shoulders. Anywhere he can reach he’s touching. His stubble scratches at your throat, adding to the pleasure of the experience.

Once you get there, Bucky places you gently on the carpet, still standing. You quirk your eyebrows at him, wondering what he’s planning. Before you have time to ask, he’s on his knees in front of you, kissing up your thighs, pulling himself up to eye level.

“Let me taste you first, bunny. I need it.” He begs, his fingers never shaking as he reaches for the back of your dress. You allow it, watching as it falls to the floor, pooling at your bare feet.

Bucky wastes no time sliding the shiny fabric across the floor, losing it in the darkness now swallowing his room. He steps away from your body, his eyes roaming your thighs, your legs, your curves.

“Perfect, bunny. You heard that, your fucking perfect.” A flutter is sent straight to your heart at his words, his metal hand reaches behind your back to unclip your lace bra, watching it be swallowed by the midnight darkness.

Bucky again admires your breast, practically drooling. He’s hard, his erection growing painfully tight in his pants. He’s made a promise to himself though, he will show you pleasure, unlike your first time meeting.

Bucky Barnes Is Going To Ravish You.

He grabs the sides of your hips, guiding you back towards the bed. You land with a soft thud, emitting a laugh, paring along with Bucky’s wide smile. The sheets and soft blankets feel heavily underneath your bare back, you expect Bucky to come on top of you, but he doesn’t.

You look around before propping yourself up on your elbows. Bucky waits at the edge of the bed, his eyes focused on you, his knees pressed into the floor.

“Can I eat you out?” He asks, already crawling towards you. Bucky places both hands on either side of your inner thighs, the cool metal hitting your skin.

“Bucky is that really-” You’ve never had your pussy ‘eaten’ before. You’ve never felt comfortable enough with past partners to let them go down on you.

“I want to bury my face in your pussy, bunny.” Bucky’s voice is pleading, begging. It sounds like he wants it more than you yourself do. You nod, and in seconds he has your thighs pulled open, your underwear off and your cunt bare before him.

Bucky could practically smell your arousal as he locked eyes with your dripping cunt, your perfect folds.

“Is this alright?” He asks, looking up at you with expectant eyes. You were damn near speechless at just the sight, but you nodded anyway.

“I won't do it unless you say it, doll.” You groan, fisting the sheets in agitation.

“Yes, Bucky.” It came out more like a moan than you intended it to. Bucky’s hands kept your legs spread as he licked a stripe up the bottom of your slit to your aching clit.

The pleasure was unlike any you’ve ever experienced. You fist the sheets tighter as the tip of his tongue swirls at your clit, before it licks broad stripes up your pussy.

Your elebows were growing weak as you tried to keep your eyes on him, his own looked at you each time he tasted you, each time his tongue swirled around your clit, making you burst with pleasure.

“You're doing well, bunny. Has anyone ever done this before?” Bucky asks, breaking the near-silence, the only sound filling the room was the rain pelting against the windows and your shared moans.

“No, James.” You moan out as your legs shake, his tongue delving inside of you, teasing your entrance.

You buck your hips, wanting to feel more, needing to feel more. Bucky lets you as he moves in tune with your hip thrust.

“It’s your first time then? Doing oral.” Bucky’s voice is deep and throaty, hot, wet, and dry. It’s everything and nothing all at once. You don’t want to answer the question, you advert your eyes from his, your cheeks going bright red.

Bucky rises from your cunt to take your chin in his fingers, forcing you to look at him, “Hey, Don’t be embarrassed, bunny. I’m glad it’s me, that way your cunt will never forget the shape of my tongue.”

He lowers himself back down to your pussy as he continuously laps at you, pleasure builds deep inside of your stomach as you fight to keep your balance. It only fails when Bucky pushes you back down, his flesh hand pushing down on your stomach.

You're now face to face with the ceiling, no longer can you see Bucky’s eyes. You can hear his lapping, your moans, the wet noises coming from his tongue and your juices combined.

“Relax, doll. Your so tight, Do you think you could take my fingers?”

You clench around his tongue, feeling it drive in and out of your hole. The anticipation rises, and you nod.

“Yes, Bucky.” He groaned in satisfaction, as he pauses his licking for just a few moments.

He brings his metal hand to your lips, placing two fingers in front of your face. “Suck on them.” Bucky orders and You do, taking two of his digits into your mouth. The metal taste like blood, but somehow it’s not unsettling.

“Do you want them inside you, bunny?” You shift as his flesh hand, previously on your stomach snakes upwards to capture a nipple in his hand, fondling its hardened peak.

“Yes! Please, yes.” You're a mess, your orgasm has been taken away from you twice when Bucky asked if you were alright. Your thighs are sticky with salvia along with your arousal.

Bucky’s metal fingers circle your entrance,

“Your so wet, doll. Breath for me, alright?” You don’t question it, you breathe in and then out, before feeling Bucky’s fingers plunge inside of you. The stretch is mildly painful but the metal is cold against your walls, similar to glass toys when you put them in the freezer. You always liked the sensation of a cold glass dildo sliding into your wet cunt, but by then you were already warm and sweaty, the feeling never lasting long.

But with Bucky’s fingers, the coolness stayed as he curled his digits, making your hips buck. This was otherworldly, unlike any sex you’ve ever experienced. His tongue meets your clit again as his fingers pump in and out of you.

“You're doing so well, bunny. Your my good girl, you know that? Taking me so well, riding my fingers.”

“Bucky!” His words were driving you closer and closer, your orgasm cresting with each growing second.

“Are you close, bunny?”

“Yes. God yes!” You first the sheets, your back arching as his fingers play with your nipples, his tongue swirls your clit, his fingers pumping in and out of you. And his mouth.

His filthy mouth.

“Make a mess on my mouth, ride my fingers until you can’t anymore, Come for me, bunny.” The words are enough to push you over the edge. Your orgasm racks through your entire body, sweet oblivion making you moan with great volume, making your thighs shake as Bucky keeps thrusting his fingers inside you, allowing you to take full advantage of your climax.

Bucky pulls his fingers out of you, smiling as he sees your limp body. He completed the promise he whispered to himself since he saw you tonight.

“I love you, bunny.”

You smile in agreement, pulling your lips to yours. You can taste your sweet arousal, the air thick with the smell of sex.

“I love you too, Bucky.” He slides into bed next to you, pulling his gray blankets over your body, you're too tired to object, knowing full well you in need of a shower, as he pulls your body to you. You snuggle against him, feeling his stiff cock rub against your bare thighs.

“Bucky, you didn’t come-”

“Shh…” Bucky silences you with a reassuring smile, tucking your head underneath his chin, and placing a gentle kiss on the side of your temple.

You make a promise that night as well.

You’ll make it up to him in the morning.

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