#why did we all take it for granted now it's just like money!!! societal expectations!!!! im falling behind in life!!!!

[missfay49]

Who is Orange?

Disclaimer: Please enjoy?  Accept?  Beware?  This… Thing that started out as character analysis and turned into a deranged fanfic, because I experienced a literal revelation mid-way through free writing.  I did not clean this up much because I’m still reeling from the theory implications myself.  I cursed a lot.

~

What does Orange Side represent?

What do we know?

Orange is a “Dark Side”, defined as being one of the Sides hidden from C!Thomas.

The other Hidden Sides were Janus, Remus, and Virgil.

All the Hidden Sides were hidden due to a key aspect of their character that C!Thomas had to first acknowledge and then accept.  Virgil required C!Thomas to acknowledge that he had heightened anxiety and accept that anxiety isn’t inherently wrong, just a different form of information that can be processed.  Remus required C!Thomas to acknowledge that he had intrusive thoughts and accept that those thoughts don’t make him evil; they’re just thoughts.  Janus required C!Thomas to acknowledge that he was capable of lying and accept that acting “selfishly” sometimes isn’t just okay, but actually critically important to managing stress.

 What are the common themes here?  

Confronting the reality about ourselves instead of pretending some traits don’t exist.

Understanding ourselves to be more complex than ‘good’ and ‘evil’.

Addressing mental health.  

Orange Side is still hidden, but we can expect him to be something C!Thomas doesn’t want to (or isn’t ready to) acknowledge.  Something that would be difficult to accept about oneself.  All Hidden Sides fall under the jurisdiction of Janus, so let’s take another look at him.

In “Can Lying Be Good?” we get a lot of information about what Janus’ purpose is:

Roman: It you really don’t want to know something, he… can keep our mouths shut.

Logan: You don’t want to believe it.  That’s where his power comes from.  Things that you want to believe.  Things that you wish were true.  And things that you wish weren’t.

Deceit: What you don’t know can’t hurt you.

This all means that Orange Side is something that would cause C!Thomas distress to learn and something he subconsciously wishes weren’t true.  This is not new information to most of you: the spin-off interpretations of Apathy and Pride are widely popular fandom theories, traits that are typically viewed as negative in large doses.

But the Hidden Sides being seen as something negative isn’t their only defining characteristic.  They typically involve an aspect a mental health, involve societal expectations, and... what is it...

Janus is the umbrella over all the other Hidden Sides, sheltering and obscuring them from view. He is the gatekeeper in a very literal sense.  What is he gatekeeping?  

What is it?  What is it what is it, why?  What does he do?  What seems bad but isn’t?  What can he do?  What issue is actually useful?  What’s useful what’s useful WHATS USEFUL WHATS USEFUL?!  WHY DOES IT HAVE TO USEFUL?

shitshitSHITSHISTHISTSTs

I KEPT ASKING MYSELF, WHAT’S USEFUL?  WHAT TRAIT COULD IT BE THAT APPEARS BAD, BUT ISN’T BAD, IS ACTUALLY USEFUL.  ANIEXTY WAS OKAY BECAUSE HE WAS JUST LOOKING OUT FOR US.  LYING WAS OKAY BECAUSE HE JUST WANTED TO PUT C!THOMAS FIRST.  INTRUSIVE CREATIVITY WAS OKAY BECAUSE DARK IDEAS OPEN UP NEW PATHS.

But the whole GODDAMN POINT is ACCEPTANCE!  

You don’t HAVE to be useful to be accepted.  You – yuo just BE.  YOU BE!

PEOPLE don’t have to prove their Usefulness to you before you can treat them with respect.  Our WORTH does not depend on what we PRODUCE. YE GODS, THE COGNITIVE DISSONANCE I JUST BROKE-

~~~

C!Thomas comes back from his self-care stay-cation.  He’s ready to start production, he is rested and refreshed.  BUT JUST LIKE EVERY PREVIOUS DILEMMA, it isn’t Good enough, Original enough, Fast enough.  He’s done everything right, why is it still wrong?  He’s accepted his anxiety, he’s accepted that things aren’t just black and white, he’s Accepted That It’s OKAY to have Dark Thoughts, he Has ACCEPTED SELF_CARE.  Why Isn’t IT ENOUGH?!

“Fuck it.”  

C!Thomas spins in his chair, looking at a man that looks just like him, but not quite.

“What?”

“Fuck it.  Fuck them.”

“You sound like Remus,” Thomas jokes.  He’s lying, of course.  He’s nervous. The Side looks like a normal guy, but something about him is unsettling.  The unidentified Side just presses his lips together, unimpressed.

“Um, ef w-who, exactly?” Thomas asks, but part of him already knows.

“All of them.  Every person who isn’t you.  Every person who expects something from you.”

“Now, you sound like Janus.” Thomas looks back at the computer screen, but the Side’s retort has him spinning around again.  

“Janus is a short-sighted pseudo-rebellious minion of a capitalistic society, just like the rest of them.”

“Uh, excuse me?!”

“Isn’t it obvious? They’re all obsessed with Success. Whether they want to play by the rules, or manipulate them, or break them, whether it’s making money or pumping out good deeds, they’re still just trying to make you be successful within the framework of a system that prioritizes production over a human life.”

Thomas just stares for a moment before he can find his voice.

“Who are you?”

“Dude, seriously?”  He waves his hands, palms up and presenting himself.  “I’m Achilleus.  I’m your motivation.”

~~~

Take a deep breath and follow me down the research black hole, where every topic I looked up was more and more terrifyingly appropriate: 

Freedom

noun

the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint.

Self-Determination

noun

the process by which a person controls their own life.

Autonomy

noun

(in Kantian moral philosophy) the capacity of an agent to act in accordance with objective morality rather than under the influence of desires.

Autonomic Nervous System (because i believe each Hidden Side is closer to the subconscious)

noun

the part of the nervous system responsible for control of the bodily functions not consciously directed, such as breathing, the heartbeat, and digestive processes.

Inherent Value

“inherent value in the case of animal ethics can be described as the value an animal possesses in its own right, as an end-in-itself” – Animal Rights – Inherent Value, by Saahil Papar

Intrinsic Value

“Intrinsic value has traditionally been thought to lie at the heart of ethics. Philosophers use a number of terms to refer to such value. The intrinsic value of something is said to be the value that that thing has “in itself,” or “for its own sake,” or “as such,” or “in its own right.”” – Intrinsic vs. Extrinsic Value, by Michael J. Zimmerman and Ben Bradley

“Finally, his sense of respect for the intrinsic value of entities, including the non-sentient, is the Kantian notion of the inherent value of all Being.  This is based on the notion that a universe without moral evaluators (e.g. humans) would still be morally valuable, and there is no reason not to regard Being as inherently morally good.” – Technology and the Trajectory of Myth, by David Grant, Lyria Bennett Moses

Motivation

“Another way to conceptualize motivation is through Self-Determination Theory … which is concerned with intrinsic and extrinsic motivation.  Intrinsic motivation happens when someone does something for its inherent satisfaction.” – Second Language Acquisition Myths: Applying Second Language Research to Classroom Teaching, by Steven Brown, Jenifer Larson-Hall

Capitalism

“The flowery language of the United States Declaration of Independence would have you believe that human life has an inherent value, one that includes inalienable rights such as “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” But in America, a major indicator of value is actually placed on being a productive member of society, which typically means working a job that creates monetary revenue (especially if the end result is accumulated wealth and suffering was inherently involved in the process).” – The Diminished Value of Human Life in a Capitalistic Society, by Seren Sensei

Religion

“At the heart of the debate between Calvinism and Arminianism lay the insurmountable chasm between God’s sovereign election versus human self-determination.” – Sovereignty vs. Self-determination: Two Versions of Ephesians 1:3-14, by Reformed Theology

Mythology

“In Classical Greece, Achilles was widely admired as a paragon of male excellence and virtue. Later, during the height of the Roman Empire, his name became synonymous with uncontrollable rage and barbarism… He chooses kleos (glory) over life itself, and he owes his heroic identity to this kleos. He achieves the major goal of the hero: to have his identity put permanently on record through kleos…

“But is this really an accurate characterization of Achilles' pivotal decision? Is he really driven to sacrifice his life by an obsessive quest for honor and glory? One scene in the Iliad suggests the answer to both questions is no.

“When Achilles leaves the battlefield after his dispute with Agamemnon, the Trojans gain the upper hand on the Greeks. Desperate to convince their best warrior to return, Agamemnon sends an envoy of Achilles' closest friends to his tent to persuade him to reconsider his decision. During this scene, Achilles calmly informs his friends that he is no longer interested in giving up his life for the sake of heroic ideals. His exact words are below:

“The same honor waits for the coward and the brave. They both go down to Death, the fighter who shirks, the one who works to exhaustion (IX 386-388)…

“Not only does Achilles reject the envoy's offers of material reward, but he rejects the entire premise that glory is worth a man's life.” – making sense of a hero’s motivation, by Patrick Garvey

Achilles (/əˈkɪliːz/ ə-KIL-eez) or Achilleus (Ancient Greek: Ἀχιλλεύς, [a.kʰilˈleu̯s])

Achilles realizes his own inherent self-worth, thereby freeing himself from the expectations of others; societal or otherwise.  Only once we are free can we find the balance between our own needs and the needs of others in a way that breeds neither anger nor resentment in either.

~~~

But that’s... that’s just... a theory.   Huh.

#sanders sides theory #orange side #orange side theory #sanders sides #character thomas #cursing tw #swearing tw #dark sides #the others #janus sanders #virgil sanders #remus sanders #orange sanders #caps tw #name theory #long post #missfay #my writing

[m-is-for-meme]

"Fun" fact: Native Americans/Indigenous People still do not have the right to vote**

Confused? Cool, history lesson time!

Native Americans were not granted the right to citizenship until the 1920s (most significantly with the Indian Citizenship Act of 1924)

They were not granted the right to vote until about the 1960s (the 15th and 19th amendments did not apply to them as again, they were not considered citizens until the late 1920s)

And their basic civil rights were not recognized federally until the Indian Civil Rights Act of 1968

To put this into perspective, Native Americans have not been considered citizens, did not have the right to vote, and were not granted your basic civil, constitutional rights ALL WITHIN THE LIFETIME OF YOUR GRANDPARENTS/PARENTS

And the REASON Native Americans were granted ANY of this was because the federal government saw it as a faster and more efficient way to assimilate them into White/European/Colonialist society - as it helped erase sovereign identity, it made it easier to break up Native American Nations, and it forced many to cast aside their Nation's culture in order to register and pass prerequisites like literacy tests/poll tax/etc.

Alright, so that's that, now let's get back to the now - 2020

Maybe some of you are going, "well you just said Nation's were granted the right to vote in the 60s, what do you mean that's not ACTUALLY a thing?"

WELL....it's complicated, but bear with me! :

Voting rights and voting inequality go hand in hand, and are not strictly limited to just one group of people (many of the same tactics and limitations that Native Americans face are used against other "people of color/minorities" too - it's important to keep this in mind as your basic civil right to vote is VERY dependent on the privilege/disparities you experience as a white or non-white person in the US)

But here's the thing, voting rights are not a nationally regulated thing - meaning, most of the time, each state will govern how and WHO gets to vote REGARDLESS of federal regulation

"But the 15th says EVERYONE should be granted the right to vote regardless of race, etc.!"

YES! In an ideal world that might be true, but keep in mind that the people and systems in power are structurally put forth as the ones who get to make that final decision

So now we get to my point, most Native American/Indigenous Nations, in the great wide genocidal history of the US, were forcibly re-located to barren lands that are what we now recognize as "reservations"

Each reservation is fundamentally different with its own unique set of problems BUT one of the most common disparities that most Native families face is that they are not granted a federally recognized address

And most states require an address to register to vote, see where I'm going?

"But how do Native Americans get their mail? How do they get IDs? How do congressmen/women know who's in their jurisdictions and what kind of aid is needed? How do they get basic utilities and access to the internet?"

ALL GREAT QUESTIONS! The answer might actually be more surprising and not as long-winded as you would expect: they don't

The most simple answer, they don't

Every Nation fights every day to access their basic needs

"But they could get a PO box!"

Yes, but a PO box is not a federally recognized address and can not be used to apply for anything and does not grant people the right to vote in any way

Furthermore, a lot of Native families do not have the money or access to transportation to GET to these PO boxes (IF they even HAVE a post office accessible and within driving distance in the first place)

But what is my point? My point is that first, these things are not a coincidence - they are direct, conscious actions and regulations that are put into place as a way to prevent Native Americans from accessing and applying their basic civil and constitutional rights, while also preventing any sort of aid/help in the process

Without the right to vote, many Native American Nations don't even get the CHANCE or the VOICE to speak up and are often left out of the conversation when looking for solutions and reparations to economic, societal, and institutional problems

At their most sinister, they're also fully intended to wipe out my people and my cousins (by limiting not only our basic necessities but also limiting how we are treated and helped as "citizens")

But they're also not JUST Native/Indigenous problems, most of these tactics present themselves in similar fashions for almost every single "minority" in the US

And they stem from a legacy of systemic racism and oppression that has only just STARTED being taken apart within YOUR PARENTS' and YOUR lifetime

So if you're sitting there frustrated with everything that is happening in the country right now, ESPECIALLY if you are a white person, I'd ask you to take the time and look at WHY these things are and will continue to happen and what your frustration/inconvenience means in the face of somebody's right to live

My final point is that these systems were inherently designed to withstand attempts at deconstructing, eliminating, and abolishing them from the people they serve to suppress

So maybe next time when you find yourself complaining, ignoring, or giving the "why can't everyone get along" spiel, take a moment to think about how you benefit or are UNAFFECTED by these systems of inequality, and whether your actions or dialogue work to support and keep them in place

#native american #indigenous #bipoc #voting #another rant from your frustrated and tired native american void of a human

[cruelangelstheses]

in the salt and swell

fandom: dragon age rating: T characters: merrill/isabela words: 1.9k additional tags: historical au, mythology au, fluff, first meetings, flirting, mermaid au description: after she and her crew end up shipwrecked, isabela encounters a mermaid. a/n: hi!! this was written for day 2 of @merribelaweek (which was yesterday but it’s fine lmao) using the prompts “ocean” and “mythology”! title from “the ocean” by against me!

read it on ao3

—

Sailing into the storm was a gamble, she’d say about it later.

And what a gamble it was.

But they’d had little choice, being chased by three French ships hellbent on getting their goods back. They’re pirates, not Vikings, and rather than get their asses thoroughly handed to them in a naval battle, Captain Isabela had decided to sail directly into an oncoming storm, figuring that it would either scare the French away or do them in, too.

She was right about that part, and they got away with several famous paintings, all worth her weight in gold, that she’d promised a former acquaintance in exchange for freeing his slaves. The storm wasn’t finished with them, though, and while Isabela has sailed through her fair share of typhoons, none made their mark quite like this one did.

The tumultuous ocean, the uncontrollable winds, the horrifying crack of lightning that split her eardrums and sent the mast crashing down onto the deck—all of it is a blur of adrenaline in Isabela’s memory. She remembers clinging desperately to the wheel, at first to try to steer the ship, but eventually just to have something to hold on to. She remembers the way it popped off its hinges and took her with it.

She and her crew all survived, luckily, albeit quite a bit worse for wear and having lost a few barrels of cargo. The paintings survived, miraculously, having been stored in a large, watertight crate. Her ship, however, was not as fortunate.

The Siren’s Call. Her baby. She had smashed against an outcrop of large, jagged rocks, launching them all onto the rough, unforgiving shore. When Isabela first looked up and saw the damage, the splintered mast, the torn sails hanging limply, it felt as if she’d been gutted, like she’d lost a part of her. I don’t know if she can be fixed, Varric had said. Isabela almost slapped him.

As it turns out, she can be fixed—for a price. There’s a shipbuilder in the town closest to where they wrecked, a quaint port city just off the coast of Wales, who offered to repair it as long as they could pay the fee. With all the damage sustained, it cost almost as much as it would to just have a new ship built. After a heated debate with her crew in which more than one suggested just stealing a new ship, they decided to just pay up. It wasn’t like they were short on money, anyway, even after losing some of their cargo.

So now Captain Isabela and her pirate crew have to search for things to do to pass the time while they wait for the Siren’s Call to be repaired. They spend their first few nights gambling and cheating at cards, easily winning back some of the money they had to spend on the ship. During the day, though, they all go off on their own, taking strolls through town or day-drinking to ward off the pain from their injuries. Isabela, for her part, always finds herself drawn back to the sea.

It’s been less than a week since the shipwreck, but she already misses sailing more than she misses her own mother (which is not much at all, but the point still stands). She misses the sea spray on her face, the view of endless ocean on the horizon, the gentle rocking of the boat on open water. For now, though, she contents herself with walking along the shoreline, letting the waves lap at her toes and watching crabs skitter across the sand.

It’s during one of these excursions, while she’s standing up to her knees alone in the water and breathing in the salty air, that Isabela notices something out in the distance.

The first thing that catches her attention is a splash, and when she squints, she can see droplets of saltwater flying up into the sky and then falling back down again. It’s probably a fish, she thinks, but if so, it’s quite a large one. Then she sees it: a green, fan-like tail at least the size of a dolphin’s. Every few seconds, it pops back up above the water with a splash, each time closer to Isabela than the last. By now she can see a dark silhouette beneath the surface, and it’s headed straight for her.

Isabela takes a few steps backward and reaches into her coin purse, where she’s stored a small but effective dagger. If this were a shark, she’d probably just run, but she has no idea what this creature is. She’s never seen anything like it.

Before she can make a decision, a head pops up out of the water, and Isabela almost chokes in surprise.

It’s a girl.

Granted, she has strange markings, almost like tattoos, all over her face, and her ears are shaped like fins, but nonetheless, Isabela is undoubtedly staring at a person.

A person with a fish tail.

“Hello!” the girl says in a lilting Welsh accent. “Are you and your friends alright? I saw the shipwreck a few days ago. Nasty one, that was.”

For a few seconds, Isabela just stares, dumbfounded. Then, snapping back into reality, she shakes her head and replies, “I, uh—yes, we’re all fine. What is—who—what are you?” If she didn’t know any better, she’d think she was hallucinating, but she didn’t drink that much last night (the more sober she is, the better she is at cards), and she hasn’t drank at all today. Two equally distressing thoughts cross her mind: One, she shouldn’t be hallucinating; and two, she’s fairly certain that she isn’t.

“Oh! Sorry,” the girl says. “I take it you’ve never met a mermaid before? I suppose you wouldn’t have; we mostly keep to ourselves.”

Isabela blinks a few times, but the girl—the mermaid—doesn’t disappear. “No,” she says indignantly. “I’ve never even heard of you except for in stories. Fictional stories. You know, mythology and such.”

“All stories contain some element of truth in them,” the girl replies, matter-of-fact.

Isabela frowns and thinks back to when she and her crew first ended up on the beach. Captain, I know you’ll never believe me, Varric had said to her, but I think I saw a...a siren or a mermaid or something. When she called bullshit, he’d added, I was underwater, and then I felt these soft, small hands grabbing my wrists and pulling me to shore. When I opened my eyes, I swear I saw some half-human, half-fish thing diving back into the sea.

She hadn’t taken him seriously, of course, but why would she? Even if she’d believed in mermaids, Varric is always making up fanciful tales; in fact, that’s about all he does. How was she to know that he might have actually been telling the truth for once in his life?

“You...you saved one of my crewmates,” she says out loud.

The girl nods. “Right, the stout one with all that chest hair.”

Isabela lets out a short bark of a laugh. “You noticed that?”

The girl shrugs. “How could I not? He seemed to practically have it out on display. But I thought maybe the storm had just messed his clothes up.”

Isabela shakes her head. “No, he wears all his shirts like that.”

The girl puts her hands up to her mouth and giggles. Isabela can’t help the astonished smile that creeps onto her face. She’s having a conversation with a mermaid, and quite a beautiful one at that.

“Oh!” the girl says suddenly. “I didn’t even introduce myself. I’m Merrill.”

It’s a lovely name, even lovelier when she says it with that pretty voice of hers. “You can call me Isabela,” Isabela says. “Well. Technically it’s Captain Isabela, but I don’t exactly have a ship to captain right now.”

Merrill grimaces. “Yeah, it was in pretty bad shape last I saw it. Is it getting fixed up? I noticed the shipbuilder investigating it the other day.”

“It is,” Isabela says, and then she laughs again as realization strikes her. “Do you know what I named it? I named it the Siren’s Call.”

Merrill snorts. “See, you were bound to meet one of us sooner or later.”

Isabela takes another few steps backward and sits down in the shallow tides, not even caring that she’s getting ocean water and wet sand on her clothes. Merrill swims up to her and lies down on her side a few paces ahead of her, letting the waves crash over her.

Up close, Isabela can see the way her torso gradually shifts from human to fish. The lower half of her body is one long, large fish tail that shimmers with bright green scales. Her top half is the same as a human’s, save for the ears. Isabela can’t help but notice that Merrill isn’t wearing any kind of covering, not that she really expected her to.

“Must be nice,” she says, eyeing her companion’s chest, “being able to just bare your whole self like that. We humans have societal norms that make it socially unacceptable for me to run around nude. Or even just in my smallclothes.”

Merrill giggles and makes no move to cover her breasts. “So I’ve heard.”

For a moment, they both just stare, each taking the other in. Then Isabela asks about the thing that’s been on her mind the moment Merrill stuck her head out of the water.

“So mermaids are real, huh?”

Merrill smiles. “Still in disbelief? That makes sense. Like I said, we’re quite reserved. We’ve been hiding for thousands of years, right under you humans’ noses. We’ve seen what your kind can do when you discover something strange or different. Besides, for a long time there was never really much reason for our paths to cross, us living in the ocean and you all living on land.”

Isabela narrows her eyes. “Then why did you save Varric? Why are you even talking to me?”

“We save sailors every once in a while,” Merrill explains. “They’re usually unconscious by that time anyway, or they think whatever they saw or felt was a trick of the mind, especially when they’re alone. As for why I’m talking to you…” She drums her fingers thoughtfully against the wet sand. “You seemed...different. I saw the way you’d sit out here for hours, just staring at the sea. I could tell you longed for it. You reminded me of...well, of a mermaid. You belong to the ocean, just like we do.”

Isabela’s mouth curls into a soft smile. “I suppose you’re right, Merrill,” she says, staring dreamily into the distance. “I suppose you’re right.”

After a short pause, Merrill adds, “Your looks didn’t hurt, either.”

That snaps her back immediately, and when she glances back over at the seemingly innocent sea maiden, Isabela notices a playful glint in her wide green eyes.

The smile on her face shifts into a delighted smirk. Two can play at that game. “Tell me, kitten,” she says, the nickname springing to her lips and sounding perfect as soon as it leaves her mouth, “how would one go about pleasuring a mermaid?”

#dragon age 2 #merrill #isabela #merribela #merribelaweek #da2 #my fics

[arkus-rhapsode]

My Hero Academia Chapter 223 Review

Well, I’m back! Yeah, if you wanna know why I took a break it was because whenever there is a villain centrist chapter it is usually pretty good. But it seems I underestimated Horikoshi and this isn’t a mere chapter. No, this is basically like the pro hero arc and that it will focus on the villains as protagonists for a little while.

So without furthur ado, let us begin.

We open on the current time with Shigaraki fighting against Gigantomechia. And as expected, they aren’t doing so good. We get some narration from Spinner on it.

We also see that just a flex from Gigantomechia’s arm causes a burst of power.

Though that seems to just be a portion of his abilities. As it seems this guy can fight for more than 48 hours before needing rest and recharge. And even in his sleep he’ll be able to attack you. He also grows larger in battle, though no word if it has like reset after awhile. With what the doctor said about Gigantomechia, I’m wondering how much of this is a quirk or just strange physiology.

We see that Shigaraki is the main target and the others can tag in and out.

I kinda love this moment as we learn that the doctor gave them some money and Toga went and bought a new coat with it. I don’t love it because the joke, I love it more in the context of Horikoshi being like “I need an excuse to draw Toga in something cute.” Even though her primary clothing was sweater.

Its not a nitpick, so much as it, just one of those moments that makes you laugh when you think about it. Though, Spinner brings up this important point that Toga had joined for Stain and there is almost nothing about Stain left. Accentuating that point is Spinner not wearing his stain costume (Yet). And remembering the highway chapter, Spinner is the most introspective and one holding Stain to the highest belief.

And here is where we really see the point of this mini arc and that’s basically the parallel of Izuku’s journey. When Shigaraki takes a break from fighting and we see him all battered and bruised,he’s equated to a young boy chasing his dreams. And considering the reckless self destruction Izuku subjected himself to, we see Shigaraki doing the same. While his wounds aren’t self inflicted, he is still throwing himself at something that, in pure power, he is outclassed and will get hurt.

And yet he’s not stopping. Shigaraki’s dream matters more to him than by his physical health.

We get a funny as hell scene with Twice and Compress when Twice gets called by Giran. However, on the other line is the CEO that was torturing Giran. He tells them to check the news.

We see that severed fingers have been placed around Japan in places where the League of Villains have operated. I also would like to take this moment and acknowledge the All Might Statue in Kamino. That’s a really nice touch.

We see the CEO and I’m skipping ahead and we find out his real name is Rikiya Yotsubashi (I’m wondering if he goes by that name or if he uses an alias as Destro’s last name was Yotsubashi and it would be telling if you shared a name with a guy who was the leader of a people’s army.). His villain name is Redestro. Which is kinda lame. Maybe its suppose to be like “Reborn Destro,” but the extra ‘Re-’ just makes it sound a bit goofy. Maybe if it was like Destro the second or something. Wait where was I?

Oh yeah, we see Redestro with the hostage Giran and he explains his view point. Tearing down society and rebuilding it in a way that allows people to utilize the full power of their abilities. This really sounds like he wants to be Armstrong from Metal Gear and make this sense of “true freedom.”

Shigaraki tries to brush them off, seeing it as just another Overhaul. But unlike Overhaul they don’t really have anything like the quirk bullets that will make it worth teaming up with.

But they find out that Giran was tortured, those fingers at the sites of their crimes are Giran’s, and he tried to erase his client data and wouldn’t give up the villains after everything. However, the liberation army was able to restore the data thanks to the help of a member of the liberation army is an IT guy. Speaking of we get our intro to all the heads of the liberation army.

Yeah this is bad. I’ll talk about this later, but these guys are far different from Overhaul. Not just in power and motive, but scale. Also lets look at each member individually (Mainly cause I want to get a bit of snark in).

Tomoyasu is the head of an IT company called Feel Good Inc. Which I really hope is a Gorillaz reference.

Hanabata is a politician, though that would make sense. If they’re trying to regain control of society, best have someone in a position who can affect laws. Also his party is called Heart Seeker, and I really hope that doesn’t allude to the idea that because he’s hot, people voted for him.

Kizuki is the head of the publishing company printing the Destro books. Also, I knew about Shueshia being the company that published Jump beforehand so this parody got me when I first read it. Also, with the fact she’s selling the books and that an arc ago we had Hawks saying he wasn’t happy with the idea of someone profiting from it. So did Hawks ever interview Kizuki? Hori get on the canon version of that and fanfic writers get on the smutty version of that.

And while Redestro is obvious, I will at least take this moment to say, I like his design. While Overhaul had that cool aesthetic with the plague doctor mask, Redestro looks like a middle-aged business man. He’s not drawn as some super hot, Light Yagami looking guy. He look normal and a bit unattractive. Its unique I feel. Usually that kind of character design is the one assisting their Bishounen bosses.

We see that Redestro has satellite cameras on them and that he could sick the heroes on them. But we get a bit more insight into him. The one who must lead the way is Destro and it seems the League after they forced All Might into retirement are the face of evil to the world. As such, Redestro must destroy Shigaraki himself.

While this seems lik one of those cliche “I’ll do it myself moments.” I actually think from the way he speaks, Redestro really does have his dad’s philosophy ingrained in him and he wants to show of the extent to which it grants. Also he probably has like a trap set.

Our chapter ends pretty well actually and I’m hyped.

Post Chapter Follow Up: There is really no negatives in this chapter aside from not much action and maybe one of two pages that feels like filler. But as a whole, its good.

The biggest strength of the chapter is Shigaraki’s journey. Again, as spelled out last week, the whole point of this is that Shigaraki must surpass all for one. Just as Izuku must surpass All Might. As Izuku grows stronger, so to must Shigaraki grow as a villain. He betrayed and outplayed the Yakuza, but he did it with the help of the heroes targeting Chisaki. But now, now he has a beast that won’t recognize him and another beast declaring war on him.

It doees sem like this arc will end with Shigaraki earning Gigantomechia’s respect by beating Redestro. But I’m very curious to see how that goes. As we see, Redestro is a far different villain from Overhaul. Overhaul was calculating and strategic, but he was just as underground as Shigaraki. He had men and disposable equipment, but he was still pretty small. Just a piece in a growing underworld.

But Redestro is actually far larger. Not only does he have more money, but more influence on the public as saw with his choice to go into support tools. He however waits in the shadows a lot more. Which you would have to do as a public figure.

Also we see how much more different than Redestro is in his goal. Like Shigaraki and Overhaul, he wants to change society, but he’s actually far closer to Shigaraki than Overhaul a Overhaul wanted to control societ. He was trying to refit the concept of the Yakuza into the modern age and make a way where he controls both crime and society. Basically making him the “Overlord” or “Godfather.” But Shigaraki and Redestro want to destroy current society. They likely wanna lead it, but they are going to literally change the fundamental structure and replace it with a new one. Shigaraki is just being more open about it.

So yeah, this’ll be Shgaraki’s moment. If I had to predict, if he beats Redestro, it’s likely that he’ll take all of his Liberation army and his support tool manufacturing centers. So this is Shigaraki looking to profit big time off of this.

Also, I love all the small touches in this chapter. From background detail to dialogue, there are the little bits of visual storytelling that I love.

Final Verdict: 9/10

Good buildup

Great characterization

Really makes you think about the complexities of the villains in this world

#my hero academia #shigaraki tomura #twice #jin bubaigawara #mr compress #my hero academia 223 #mha 223 #bnha 223 #toga himiko #dabi #league of villains #spinner #hero killer stain #destro #redestro #rikiya yotsubashi #boku no hero academia #boku no hero academia 223 #giran #tomoyasu chikazoku #koukuu hanabata #chitose kizuki #superpower liberation army #all for one #all might #izuku midoriya #gigantomechia

[ghinanotlinetti]

Things My Parents Did and Didn’t Teach Me

Hi! For this post I thought I'd do an exercise from one of my favourite podacats, On Purpose with Jay Shetty, from the episode titled: 6 Reasons Why We Need to Develop the Emotional Skills Our Parents Never Had. For this episode, Jay recommended listeners to create two lists: things we learnt from our parents, and things we taught ourselves. This exercise is helpful in our self-reflection and character development; it makes us realise that we shouldn’t take the valuable lessons that we passed on to us from our parents for granted, and it’s not the duty of our parents to provide us with the utmost perfect childhood and equip us with ever life hack, life lesson, emotional skills, because this is difficult to learn on our own, let alone teach a child. I’ve been living on my own for over four years now, it’s been a crazy wild journey, so I’ve been taking as much time as I need to process and figure out myself for myself and the people that I love. Here is my list and my take on the exercise:

Things my parents taught me

So just to be straight forward, I grew up with relatively strict, conservative Muslim, Asian parents. I’ve been through the typical stereotype aspects of this upbringing, I can’t say my experiences came under the extreme cases nor are they the polar opposite, but with that being said, there’s a lot more to it than the stereotype you see online, it’s never black and white. For those who may be unfamiliar with this childhood, let me briefly explain. Strict Asian parents are not the most gentle and affectionate parents, they have a weird way of showing that they love you and care for you. So their children would tend to chase success in greatest form success can come because they feel like only then will they be able to receive affection. Asian parents also have a tendency to have an obsession with controlling their children’s lives. In conservative Muslim households, some parents might use religious duty to manipulate their children. It isn’t uncommon for people with this upbringing to recall their parents pushing them that they had to do a certain thing because if they didn’t not only would they go to hell but their parents will also go to hell in the afterlife. There’s definitely a great level of pressure to fulfill great expectations, which is unfortunate because not everyone is blessed with opportunities and privileges in this life to exceed societal expectations. Sometimes I feel like it’s not the fault of the parents or the kids; there’s some parents who tell their kids “no, I don’t want you doing x” and the kid doesn’t even think of arguing back because the thought can’t even cross their mind, and in retrospect you never really know maybe the parent is willing to change their viewpoint had they made a sound argument in support of doing x because let’s be completely honest, parents don’t fully know what’s best for their kids and aren’t always right. 

My parents taught me the basics of how to be responsible, hard-working, and have respect for others and one’s self. Growing up I always knew being kind, genuine, authentic, spiritual, and patient was the key to living a peaceful life. As a child I was disciplined to the point where I felt shame and humiliation a bit too much, I would say it got unhealthy at a point so I could never discipline my own children, should I have them in the future, in the same way that my parents did to me. I couldn’t learn how to trust them as a kid. As said in the podcast a great many of children don’t learn trust from their parents, which is a shame but it also doesn’t mean that we’re doomed because it’s never to late to start again. If I have children, I wouldn’t use fear and manipulation as the first and ultimate tool for getting my children to listen, I want them to respect me but I also want them to trust me to the point where they know in their hearts they can come to me at any given situation and time and I will be there for them. 

I thank my parents every day for teaching me how to have a night routine; this has always kept me focused and I never actually appreciated it at the time. I have struggled with sleep as an adult but I would think back to what my parents taught me and get my ass back on the line by working on routine. I also have to thank my parents so much for giving me a love of reading and observation, because this has always kept my mind sharp and steady. I loved quiet time as kid and continue to now, it goes hand-in-hand with self-care so although self-care wasn’t explicitly taught it was indirectly taught to me by my parents. I dread to think of where I would be if my parents didn’t teach me how to love God. Teaching me to be a dedicated worshipper of God was one of the greatest gifts my parents gave to me because it’s always given me hope and lightness in my life. I learnt about my Indonesian-Acehnese culture and tradition from my parents. They taught me about my family lineage, how to be proud of where and what we came from because life is a journey about finding your way back, back to home, back to beginnings, back to God. My ethnic features as a kid used to be an insecurity of mine. This lesson was one that I took for granted and had to relearn from looking back at how my parents raised me. It since has become my source of strength. I used to hate my big ethnic nose, now I love my ethnic features for what they are because they represent my Arab lineage and what I came from. I’m even thankful for the important lesson of how to cook rice the proper way taught by my parents so I don’t have to learn the BuzzFeed way, which is horrendous. Now that I’m pondering, I think I got my sense of humour from my parents. My parents just know how to tell funny stories, always had a knack for storytelling. My mum does the best imitations of people that are just spot on. I always love talking to my parents when I’m not home. So that’s some of the valuable lessons my parents taught me. Moving on to what I taught myself...

Things I taught myself

I knew the basics of good work ethic, responsibility, and independence from my parents but I would say that I mastered those things for myself in my young adult years. This was done by trial and error, and also observing my close peers who I admire and look up to. How to live alone is also taught through trial and error experiences, it can't truly be taught from mere theory. I expanded my love of reading and read in all areas I could, although I still need to work on my reading habits. I love reading but sometimes I’d rather waste my time watching YouTube videos, I know, I really shouldn’t but I can’t help it sometimes! I knew the importance of loving God but my parents taught me strictly by the book from the Islamic teachings. Nothing wrong with that but I decided I could do more so I dived in much deeper in faith and spirituality and grew to love meditation because it kept me calm and helped me check in with my intentions. Self-love is a difficult concept to grasp because of all the unlearning which needs to be done, and personally I think the best way to approach self-love is in the self-discovery journey, so I don’t think my parents would be able to teach me this. As I’ve mentioned before trust is difficult to learn, it needs the relationship to be balanced and balance comes from seeing the other as an equal. I’m still learning to be good with money but so are my parents, and I’m glad we get to learn together. Stress and anger management is another thing I struggle with, but so do my parents and other people around me. Perhaps I could’ve benefited if I was introduced to meditation and breathing technique at an earlier age because this would be helpful for me as a child to manage stress and social anxiety. They say that social anxiety is inherited and I can see that in my parents and me. We’re all getting better at it, Alhamdullilah, but I shouldn’t have overthought my friendships and have as much social anxiety as I did back then. I was too anxious to let myself enjoy life's moments at times, and today I still feel like I'm doing this. I was never taught Indonesian history as a kid from my parents. I barely knew anything about my country being an expat. Nothing wrong with this but it was something I had to learn later on, glad it happened that way if I’m being honest because it meant that I was able to critically analyse whilst also taking in information. I knew I was fairly familiar with indifferent cultures and traditions because I grew up in a multicultural/multinational community, but I was tested to the limit in my learning of acceptance when I travelled in my uni days. This doesn’t just apply to people’s cultures but also people’s mindset. I've met so many different types of people through travelling and boy did I mert some crazy people over the years, but thank god for the crazy good people I've met along the way!

I’m not in any way resentful of my parents for not teaching me these things. Maybe with some of these things I as frustrated at the beginning and I may have lashed out at my parents out of stress because I didn’t know what to do with what I felt. But I’ve learn to let my emotions pass because they are afterall temporary. By doing this exercise, I know that I need to love my parents not for what they are, but for who they are. I hope to make my parents proud of me, not for my accolades but for who I’m capable of becoming. If you’re interest in doing this exercise, I hope you get to do so and share with as many people who might benefit from this too! Also before you do so I recommend to heck out On Purpose with Jay Shetty on podcast streaming platforms, go to the episode titled 6 Reasons Why We Need to Develop the Emotional Skills Our Parents Never Had and have a listen. Whilst you’re at check all other episodes too because they’re really good for self-reflection!

#on purpose with jay shetty #jay shetty #podcast #wellness #self-development #parents #emotional skills #mental health #upbringing #childhood #reflection #self-reflection #asian parents #ghinawrites

[her-culture]

BDSM as a Logical Reaction to Monopoly Capitalistic Society

KATHERINE MEADOWS

Popular culture depicts BDSM (Bondage, Discipline/Domination, Submission/Sadism, Masochism), which utilizes sexual power dynamics as a means of furthering excitement and eroticism, in a way that generally distorts mainstream perception of practitioners. Ironically, by enforcing just one extreme of BDSM play, thereby painting the culture in a biased light, the media is demonstrating exactly what BDSM is confronting. Power is everywhere: present in institution-to-individual interactions as well as individual-to-individual interactions—including sexual relationships. In understanding how inextricably combined power and sex are, we can understand why power dynamics are the linchpin of BDSM play and get a more holistic view of this heavily misunderstood subculture.

Power is Everywhere

On bold-type phrases, interpret “power.”

To understand this concept, we have to examine what gives an entity power or what characterizes something with power. Power lends agency, running everything from machinery to the White House. As an abstract, power allows us to hold some capacity of control. Necessarily, this concept involves an exchange between an empowered entity and an entity lacking empowerment.

Forces in our atmosphere as well as the ground beneath our feet have a capacity to control where populations decide to live due to natural disasters and the motion of tectonic plates can kill.

Police officers also have the license to end a life—if they deem it necessary—and to deprive individuals of their freedom. Elected officials and representatives have abundant influence on the laws that govern our society and can even sway the governing forces of other nations. Power decides the rules and, if those rules are not followed, the repercussions. Those who have power can wage wars; the masses are the pawns of those with power.

Even micro interactions involve power exchange. The professor has the qualifications to grant a grade, and therefore, influence the likelihood that a student’s invested time, money, and hard work will result in a degree. It is within a parent’s hands to decide everything for their child until that child becomes an adult.

The Problem with Power

All of these positions that we identify with power also come with the potential for corruption. The parent, meant to act in the best interest of the child, may abuse that child or use the child in a myriad of inappropriate and dangerous ways. The professor may blackmail the student for something that they want.Those that govern our nation may cater to their own interests rather than those of the citizens they are in place to serve.

The police officer may use an unmonitored prejudice when they rationalize whether or not to use deadly force. The officer is prone to biases like anyone else, but because their position in society holds considerably more power, these biases carry more weight. If you’ve been paying any level of attention to the news or social media trends, you are probably aware that all of these problematic dynamics are both present and in a number of instances, allowed by the Monopoly Capitalist system to persist.

In a Monopoly Capitalist society, citizens serve a few functions. Not only are they the worker bees slaving away their libidos for the benefit of the 1 percent, they are simultaneously the consumers latching that dulled desire & stimulation to empty entertainment and luxury after unnecessary luxury; Lending their meager paychecks to those who make the profits. The Protestant values our society was built on (hard work is necessary for rewards and status) helped construct the path that most Americans are pressured to take. The school system teaches us that we must get a job to earn money so that we can buy the food and shelter that we need to survive, along with the most recent iPhone, clothing fad and other necessities.This system pressures us to go to places of higher education that shackle us to our debt in the name of a more prestigious existence (a specialized job with a higher income—and a more costly certification process). Yet, this upward mobility—a cornerstone of the “American Dream”—has never been easy in America. According to the The Equality of Opportunity Project, a child’s chances of “earning more than their parents have fallen from 90 percent to 50 percent over the past half century,” while the wage gap between the top and bottom percentiles grows broader. The America that is okay with these blatant disparities is the same nation that drives home the values, legislation, and economy that keep it this way.

The Role of Power in Identity

The world that we live in carries many forms of power that consistently determine our environment by limiting options, directing individuals toward one route instead of another, and largely shaping who we are. Foucault argued that power can now be understood as the “boundaries that enable and constrain [an individual’s] possibilities for action, and on people’s relative capacities to know and shape these boundaries.” Power sculpts who we are by being present in the influences on our “possibilities” from birth.

If you are born an American citizen, you were probably born in a hospital current on specific regulatory codes enforced by the dictation of the Department of Health. You were born in a healthy, clean environment, away from toxins and unsafe conditions. If you were born in a developing country, you may have come into the world undernourished, in a war zone, or into a poverty-stricken family. Already, two very separate tracks have been paved. If you went to public school growing up, you were taught logic and the scientific method for determining truth—as well as accepted organizations that presumably follow these methods and present the facts that the masses can invest in. If you went on to higher education, you learned the acceptable and unacceptable ways in which information is integrated into cultural understanding. The process by which we determine what information to let into the canon of accepted ideas is monitored by those with the responsibility to dictate which educational facilities will elevate or condemn. As a contrasting example, religious facilities may use other measures for truth, such as what is outlined in a sacred text. Socially, some use anecdotal (subjective, empirical) evidence, which is generally unaccepted in the scientific community. As Foucault detailed, “scientific discourse and institutions...are reinforced (and redefined) constantly through the education system, the media, and the flux of political and economic ideologies."

In the American school systems, you were taught the rules of this society by parents and peers alike: red means stop, killing people is wrong, the most important goal of life is to make money, etc. We gleaned all of our symbolic recognition, moral understandings, and ideological brainwashing from the culture and society we were socialized in. We were taught everything within the confines of what the overarching systems of control allowed us to learn.

Maybe we learned about these systems: ideology, corruption, etc.—and decided that we want less restriction and more freedom of action. Sometimes, we tested the limits of these systems of control; went over the speed limit one too many times and faced the repercussions. Sometimes, we learned and sometimes, we became more curious. Sometimes, we go farther and find ourselves in the almighty face of power—facing something more than just a $100 fine—facing a life sentence, facing mortality, facing crippling debt and repossession, facing ostracization and isolation—all methods of intense control.

Even if we didn’t encounter this backlash, we certainly grew up hearing about those who did. Part of our societal education is to learn about those who did not play by the rules and how they were made examples of. Now, fear becomes a mechanism of control, wielding power. Institutions, especially “prisons, schools, and mental hospitals” set a clear standard and promoting conformity in society. “Their systems of surveillance and assessment no longer required force or violence, as people learned to discipline themselves and behave in expected ways,”John Gaventa of adds.

Where BDSM Enters the Picture

Power permeates life in the ability to provoke something. Because of this fact, we are constantly surrounded by very subtle, inbred modes of control— constantly subjected to unquantifiable power dynamics, that we largely avoid consciously recognizing, because it would hinder functioning smoothly in this social system.

BDSM brings these power dynamics to the table and forces participants to recognize them and move within them. To understand these dynamics is a kind of power in itself because it is the first step in expanding the capacity for changing the instruments that alter and dictate who we are. Practitioners experience what it feels like to be entirely in control of the situation or to experience complete impotence (and not just if the scene gets weird). By allowing them to fully invest in roles they do and do not play within society, BDSM allows people to confront their staggering lack of power as an individual. Play can be very cathartic, with a potential for both great healing and great shattering.

Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby

Power permeates the sexual field similarly to the way it permeates institution-to-individual interactions. For example, sex may be used as an exchange for money or advantageous situations. Some individuals may find it empowering to entice others through sexual attraction, just as it is a show of empowerment to deny sexual interactions. Maybe you find the physical show of power (domination) as a turn on.

Generally in sex, a duo can be classified into one of two categories that do not necessarily align themselves with the opposing: Dominant and Submissive. One gives, one receives. One controls the situation, the other allows themself to be operated. This juxtaposition can go as vanilla as one person initiating or guiding the other or as intense as a BDSM scene that is orchestrated to follow an agreed upon script. There may be pairings of two Dominants and two Submissives, but the power play remains the same. How pronounced the power dynamics are determines where on the scale from “Conforming” to “Deviant” the sexual act falls.

Think about the nonverbal conversation that goes on during sex (inside and outside BDSM play), from the point of initiation. Perhaps it starts with a dialogue between the eyes—lingering just too long on the lips or body. When a hand crosses the threshold and is placed on a knee, an arm, or directly onto the other’s genitals, a question has been asked—namely, “is this okay?” If the person being touched is uninterested or has been read wrong, they will [ideally] verbally or nonverbally respond conveying that information. Or they may respond with another question: moving in to kiss the initiator or touching them back. The one acting is the one showing power, as power is the ability to do something specific. A couple may show power equally and at the same time. Or perhaps, one member of the group will take a stronger leading role, directing which positions are utilized. This isn’t to say that the passive member is void of power, as they always have the power to refuse advances (except in cases of harassment, coercion, sexual assault, and rape). Even during a sex act, if the Dominant directs the Submissive in a way that the sub dislikes, they can respond either verbally (“stop”) or physically by assuming a role of power and redirecting the action to something that does please them. Power often operates to benefit the entity with power; and in sex, the goal is generally that all parties involved get off in some way. To directly facilitate one’s own orgasm or excitement is to assume a role of power. To negate another’s eroticism is also a utilization of personal power. In this light, BDSM becomes a “set of tools for sandboxing...mainstream power dynamics,” according to freaksexual.com, “by providing a safe space to experience and confront, in a corporeal way, all levels of power and control.”

Conclusion

In a world where power permeates every interaction, social construct, and institution, human beings are constantly sculpted and directed by subtle forces that surround everything we know. By bringing these power dynamics into a space where they can be physically confronted, negotiated, and controlled in a way that is ultimately pleasurable, BDSM provides a cathartic release for the tensions that a Monopoly Capitalist society presents.

This article was published on the HerCulture blog. If you would like to submit an article, head on over to HerCulture to learn more about our writers and our magzine. Additionally, check out our social media (twitter, instagram, facebook, and tumblr!), our handles are herculture. Give this post a like and make sure you follow us on any of our accounts. By the end of December, we would like to reach our goal of 400 people on this tumblr account!

Start a culture revolution!

x Likhita

#understanding #herculture #culturerevolution #magazine

[professortora]

bad ending verse update

so to recap "bad ending" is basically "canon ending" verse -- naprem is revived after the canon ending of ds9 and basically has to reckon with the HELL dukat left her to deal with. her daughter is dead, dukat is dead, her aunts are dead and so is the rest of her family. her collaborator status is no longer contestable and her people refuse to grant her citizenship, so shes stuck in limbo, wishing she were fucking dead

i don't usually do much with this universe because it's so unbelievably fucking sad. after spending some time on ds9, she eventually goes to cardassia prime because she literally has no idea what else to do and she's heard there are members of dukats family who are still alive and she wants to meet them and i guess...apologize? she doesn't really know what she's doing. it's not a good idea but it's the only idea she has.

so she goes to cardassia to meet with mekor dukat, dukats oldest son and, if you somehow weren't aware, a profound and colossal shit. he is, as one might expect, not happy to see her. he assumes she's there looking to be paid off, and the dukat family isn't exactly swimming in money at the moment. he's also, oh yeah! a psychosexual sadist with a violent streak, so she gets the fuck out of there, but then she doesn't really have anywhere else to go.

which is how she ends up with garak of all people.

now, i have yet to figure out exactly how this happens. its possible -- probable -- that garak is aware she's on cardassia and has had agents on her since she landed. its possible julian helps them connect, or kira, out of pity for naprem's circumstances. maybe they just run into each other by chance and garak takes pity on her instead. one way or another, garak ends up agreeing to host dukat's suicidal undead bajoran mistress because, listen... that is exactly the kind of life elim garak is cursed to lead, don't tell me that's not EXACTLY his luck. first ziyal, now her mother -- he is just fuckin cursed to constantly have to be the person cleaning up after dukat's messes.

so up until this morning that was all i had: naprem, undead and ready to die a second time, no family, no future, damaged beyond trust or repair, living in elim garak's house with all the other ghosts.

and then i realized... naprem is a mother without a child. she's always had a soft spot for cardassian children, a gift with them... cardassia prime is SWARMING with orphans, and it has no services to offer them, no structure to support them. they've always disregarded orphans as a societal burden, leeches of resources that are better off given to someone with a house and a family. and even with all her heartbreak and her anger for these people, even though the cardassians have literally taken EVERYTHING from her... she would never be able to turn away from that.

it probably starts out with one young child -- one in desperate, immediate need. but then it's more and more and quickly she's realizing -- this. she could do this. she might be the only person in the universe who could do this, who understands how, who wants to. she knows, intimately, what it's like to have nothing and no one, no family, no home. shes houseless, too. and she can't not help them, she can't turn away from them, they need a champion, they need a mother, and she could be it.

and garak is SO far out of his element lmao you KNOW how uncomfortable he gets around children and he's so thoroughly cardassian like, yeah, it's a tough break, and the slavers and criminals who take advantage of orphans, who are so vulnerable to exploitation -- he hates it, of course he does. but this isn't how things are DONE, they're incredibly strapped for resources as it is, and WHY ARE THERE FORTY CHILDREN LIVING IN HIS HOUSE, HIS HOUSE IS NOT BIG, TORA THE BREADTH OF YOUR COMPASSION IS A REAL AND PRESENT DANGER TO US ALL

and on another level he can't understand how she can be so forgiving -- everything dukat took from her, hell, everything damar took from her (damar, who is a damn hero to the people of cardassia -- "corat" and "damar" are extremely popular names now and every time tora hears either garak sees her fists clench, if she had damar here in front of her, would she be so forgiving, he wonders -- and to that end, surely she holds him responsible too, for what happened -- she must, after all he holds himself responsible, in a way, he holds all of them responsible -- if he had agreed to leave the station, if he had simply tricked her into believing he would, if he had simply found a way, surely he could've found a way -- ziyal didn't have to die. it was a pointless death. surely tora naprem must hold him somewhat responsible. but then, shouldn't she hold them all responsible? even if ziyals death had been useful, had been necessary, would it ever be possible to convince her mother of that? wouldn't it still seem, to her, that the only light in the universe had been extinguished for the sake of another? bajorans hold different views on the importance of the individual -- but surely any mother would be resentful.)

(and she is that, he's seen it -- but not enough for her to ignore the needs of a houseless child.)

soon it's clear that garaks tiny house can't possibly hold every orphan on cardassia (it can't even hold most of them that live on his side of town, which, if you'll recall professor tora, i did TELL YOU) and like... a lot of these kids have special needs either physically, mentally, or circumstantially like some were already orphans before the war, some are barely a year or two old, most have severe ptsd, most are starving or severely dehydrated, many have severe developmental disorders because they've been living on the streets so long. they need organized support planet-wide

so naprem gets crackin

first, she contacts the federation. she knows she can get their support to do this. and she can apply for federation citizenship now that she's basically homeless herself. the federation have been fairly stingy about supporting cardassia after the war, but this is the kind of mission of mercy they eat the fuck up

then, she starts getting involved in cardassian politics. and at first she pisses a lot of people off -- this really isn't done, there's a huge anti-orphan stigma on cardassia. but we all know what a gifted politician naprem is, and she knows the system really well. she knows how to argue, compellingly, that this is a good idea -- that these children are some of the only ones cardassia has left, and are, in many ways, a much bigger social burden if they aren't cared for than if they are. she starts seeking out teachers, social workers, people who lost everything in the war and are looking for a sense of purpose. and most of them aren't too interested at first, but she seeks out people who are like her -- parents who lost children, parents who aren't technically parents anymore, who spend every day wishing their children had lived instead of them. slowly but surely she builds the first network of social services for the houseless. she becomes known as the mother of orphans. if you don't have a house, or a family... tora naprem will give you one.

and it doesn't heal her heartbreak. it doesn't fix her. honestly she's broken beyond repair at this point. but it gives her a purpose. and every day, she goes home to a gaggle of cardassian children who love her, and need her, who cry to be held and vye for her attention. who bunch in around her when she's reading them a story, squirming close to her because she's so warm. working up the courage to call her "mother," which always makes her tear up no matter which of them does it or when. theres so many of them but they really are all...hers. she loves all of them, she would fight and die for all of them, and as long as they're there, she has a reason to keep waking up in the morning.

idk i just really love that idea lmao

[staches-and-sabres]

Now, it's only fair that I ask you to take on the same challenge! Prime-numbered asks! Although you can skip the sex-related ones, if you want.

*cracks knuckles* All right, here we go .  .  .

Birthplace:  Franklin, Tennessee

Ancestry:  Predominantly Scots-Irish, but in general I’m just your garden-variety Western European mutt. :P

Biggest fear(s):  Being alone, being invisible, and never discovering who I am.

Worst habit(s):  Dermatillomania and selling myself short.

What do you do as soon as you walk in the house?  Go to my room and change clothes (if I worked that day) and get my laptop set up.

When did you fall in love for the first time?  I don’t know if I’ve ever been in love, honestly.  If I have, then it would’ve been during my sophomore year of college – when ~Scott Muller~ happened.  [cringes]

When was the last time you laughed hard?  Two nights ago when I watched recent segments of The Daily Show online. XD  Trevor Noah is a gem.

What was the first thing you thought when you woke up yesterday morning?  The same thing I think every morning – “Uggghhhh, already?!”

Who was your favourite teacher?  Ooooh, I’ve had a few teachers over the years who were pretty incredible!  But I think I’ll go with the teacher I had for sophomore Honors English and then two years of Latin – Mr Ron Heady.  He was a BOSS. (^ 0 ^)

What is your favourite ice cream flavour?  Vanilla, honestly – followed by mint chocolate chip and Otter Paws (vanilla ice cream with chocolate-covered pecans and a caramel swirl – it’s on the long list of things that are better than sex, tbh)

Fantasy dinner guest(s)?  Oooh, wow.  Ummmm .  .  . I’m gonna say our OCs!  Because honestly, I love them the most.

When was the first time you smoked?  Never.  I tried one of my mother’s cigarettes back when I was in my early twenties or so, and immediately I was just like N O P E .

Name the three most important people in your life:  My dad, my brother, and .  .  . I guess technically my mother, because she physically gave birth to me.

Favourite movie:  Moana.  That movie rocked my face off, and I cannot WAIT to get my very own copy of it on Blu-ray next month! :’)

What was your biggest worry five years ago, and do you still feel the same about it at this minute?  Hmm .  .  . five years ago was 2012, and I think my biggest worry that year was that my mother was going to snap because of the divorce and kill either herself or one/all of us (meaning my dad, my brother, and me).  I still have that fear, but to a far lesser degree.

Do you practice self love or self loathing?  I don’t need any practice hating myself – I’m a pro. *finger guns*

If you could erase an event from your mind, which one would you choose?  Probably the entire summer of 2015.  Y’know that saying “Hindsight is 20/20″?  Yeah .  .  . I f**ked up pretty tremendously.

Do you stand for what you believe in, or are you pleasing others?  Both, to an extent, but I’ve been trying to get away from the latter.

Who’s the oldest person you’ve had sex with?  lmao

How much do you weigh?  Not enough. :^/

What size jeans do you wear?  1-3 in juniors’, 26 in men’s.

How do you feel about age differences in relationships?  I’m going to plead the Fifth on this one, sorry.

Do you like to burn candles or incense?  Candles!!! :D

Have you ever kissed or had sex with someone of the same sex?  No.  I wouldn’t mind it, though – the first one, at least .  .  .

How often do you brush your teeth?  Usually twice a day, but at least once.

How often do you shave your legs?  Not nearly as often as I’d like, but it’s such a pain in the ass to shave, and I almost always nick myself somewhere.

Should prostitution be legalized?  No.

If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?  Because money and societal expectations.

If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?  Either Canada or the UK – excellent friends, excellent weather, excellent scenery, and no American Conservatism™.

Plans for tomorrow?  Work, and then class assignments.

This time last year, can you remember who you liked?  One of my very straight friends, lol.

What is the last thing you bought?  Technically, a five-grain baguette. XD

Have you ever been caught sneaking out?  Nope, because I’ve never snuck out!

Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they?  Yes, but not for myself!  I mean yeah, I have considered possible names for any future child(ren) I might acquire, but it’s more like “Oooh, I think that’d be a nice name for a girl/boy…”  I’ve only put Serious Thought into what I should name my OC’s daughter – and with the help of my dear friend Kit, I finally decided on Adelaide.  (^ u ^)

How did you get your name?  My mother liked it, and my dad thought it was nice, so voila.  I’m ambivalent.

What do you think of President Obama?

I have .  .  . mixed feelings, honestly.

When did you first have sex?  lmao

Favourite fictional character(s):  *takes deep breath* Dr Ian Malcolm, Dr Alan Grant, Dr Leonard McCoy, Dr John Watson, Dr Gregory House (after Alan Grant, I decided to just keep the trend going, lol) … Princess Leia, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Plo Koon, Jango Fett, Padme Amidala, Finn, Chirrut Imwe, R2-D2, and let’s just say all the clonetroopers for simplicity’s sake … Eowyn, Faramir, Eomer, Aragorn, Spock, Four, Finnick Odair, Tony Stark, and Steve Rogers.  That’s all I can think of at the moment, you’re welcome. :P

How did you meet the last person you kissed?  On match.com, lol

How many siblings do you have?  One

#at long last!!! #thank you dear! <3 #answered #about me #katakulio

[erraticfairy]

Neuromyth: Intrinsic Motivation is Driven by External Reward

One of the best motivators to learn is personal satisfaction.[1] But where does this internal drive come from? Many believe that students are motivated to learn because of what the people around them do, called extrinsic motivation.

Starting in the 1970s, it was popular to believe the key to success lay within the now famous self- esteem movement.[2] This has proved, to a certain extent, to be validated by more recent research: A person’s own belief in his or her ability to learn actually influences learning outcomes.[3] What has not panned out in the research is the belief that the development of positive self-esteem in children depends upon praise and positive reinforcements from adults and peers. So, what does makes a child believe in herself?

In a very mistaken interpretation of the research, teachers began giving children stickers and rewards for everything they did to “boost their self-esteem.” This misguided practice not only led to disingenuous acts of rewarding kids for simply fulfilling basic expectations (“You followed the instructions? Congratulations! Here’s your sticker.” “You didn’t get into a fight today? Congratulations! Here’s your sticker.”), but also delegitimized sincere feedback and praise for effortful improvement. This operant conditioning thinking led to a revival of external rewards to get kids to do things in schools, which in turn led to the eventual understanding that intrinsic motivation is not always driven by external reward. (The more than 7,500 teacher resources for sticker rewards options on Amazon.com alone indicate how many teachers have been persuaded that giving out stickers will keep kids on track.)

External rewards can take many forms, including positive praise and feedback, tangible rewards (such as a sticker, candy, money, or praise from parents or peers) or pressures (being tape-recorded or watched to be sure you comply or fined for bad behavior).[4] People can be extrinsically motivated in introjected fashions, such as going to school because of societal or cultural expectations, but the best way to instill motivation is through positive intrinsic forces (resolving a real-life problem of personal interest, learning to play music for the pleasure it gives, or being allowed to choose how and why to approach an assignment)[5] as this is the only way to assure potential transfer or future use of the learned competency.

Where the Myth Comes From

Many teachers believe their sole job is to keep kids motivated and on task, as reflected in numerous teacher guides (Motivating Students Who Don’t Care: Successful Techniques for Educators;[6] Practical & Easy Ways to Motivate Your Students (A+ Teacher Idea Book); [7] 50 Quick Ways to Motivate and Engage Your Students[8]). While it is true that students perceive a teacher’s own level of motivation through social contagion,[9] it is not true that rewards— or punishments— need to be connected to the student-teacher relationship. It would be simpler to believe that teachers held all the bargaining chips for motivation in their own actions, but this is not true.

Every student comes to class with a lot of personal baggage; his own motivation for schoolwork is influenced not only by what the teacher does, but also by what his past experience has been with the subject, what he ate (or didn’t eat) for breakfast, his relationships with his parents and peers, and how much he slept (or didn’t) the night before, among a host of other factors. Motivation is not as simple as offering a reward. Teachers need to better understand the complex mechanisms of motivation to better leverage their role in student learning. While the teacher is the determining factor in establishing the right learning environment by demonstrating his or her enthusiasm for the subject matter and genuine concern for the students,[10] external rewards are not necessarily part of the magic formula to guarantee student motivation.

What We Know Now

We now know that autonomous motivation, or intrinsic structures for motivation, are much more powerfully associated with positive self-concept and academic achievement than external rewards.[11] In a sense, being an autonomous learner is its own reward. Self-determination theory tries to unite the best ways of using external motivators for intrinsic motivation, and suggests that teachers leverage the balance between what they can do for the students and what the students must do for themselves.[12]

In school-age populations, it is clear that punitive, externally driven motivators are associated with lower levels of intrinsic motivation for things like prosocial behavior, meaning that they are less desirable than intrinsic motivators.[13] Bear and colleagues’ research showed that helping students find their own intrinsic motivators— taking them on a walk and having them identify problems in their neighborhood they want to resolve and celebrating their success with them, for example— is more powerful than just supplying external praise.

According to Augustyniak and colleagues’ article, “Intrinsic Motivation: An Overlooked Component for Student Success,” Students with greater levels of intrinsic motivation demonstrate strong conceptual learning, improved memory, and high overall achievement in school.[14] These students are more likely to experience a state of deep task immersion and peak performance.[15] Studies have also shown that students with higher intrinsic motivation are also more persistent.[16] In fact, intrinsic motivation is a powerful factor in performance, persistence to learn, and productivity.[17]

Clearly, intrinsic motivation is effective in spurring student achievement. But perhaps most important of all, the research clarifies that the teacher’s role is confined to creating the circumstances under which the best learning occurs, rather than providing rewards themselves. Students need to learn to identify their own motivators, rather than relying on teachers for motivation.

[1] Cerasoli, Nicklin & Ford, 2014

[2] Briggs, 1975

[3] Hattie, 2012; 2015

[4] Deci, Koestner & Ryan, 1999; Lepper, Henderlong & Gingras, 1999

[5] Cerasoli, Nicklin & Ford, 2014

[6] Mendler, 2009

[7] Gruber & Gruber, 2002

[8] Gershon, 2015

[9] Radel, Sarrazin, Legrain & Wild, 2010

[10] Hattie, 2012

[11] Emmanuel, Adam, Josephine & Solomon, 2014

[12] Ryan & Deci, 2016

[13] Bear, Slaughter, Mantz & Farley-Ripple, 2017

[14] Gotfried, 1990

[15] Shernoff, Abdi, Anderson & Csikszentmihalyi, 2014; Shernoff, Csikszentmihalyi, Schneider & Shernoff, 2003

[16] Hardre & Reeve, 2003; Vallerand, Pelletier, Blais, Briere, Senecal & Vallieres, 1992

[17] Grant, 2008; Augustyniak, Ables, Guilford, Lujan, Cortright & DiCarlo, 2016, p. 465

from World of Psychology https://ift.tt/2W8ugKt via theshiningmind.com

#World of Psychology #child psychology

[positivepsychologyinterventions]

Neuromyth: Intrinsic Motivation is Driven by External Reward

One of the best motivators to learn is personal satisfaction.[1] But where does this internal drive come from? Many believe that students are motivated to learn because of what the people around them do, called extrinsic motivation.

Starting in the 1970s, it was popular to believe the key to success lay within the now famous self- esteem movement.[2] This has proved, to a certain extent, to be validated by more recent research: A person’s own belief in his or her ability to learn actually influences learning outcomes.[3] What has not panned out in the research is the belief that the development of positive self-esteem in children depends upon praise and positive reinforcements from adults and peers. So, what does makes a child believe in herself?

In a very mistaken interpretation of the research, teachers began giving children stickers and rewards for everything they did to “boost their self-esteem.” This misguided practice not only led to disingenuous acts of rewarding kids for simply fulfilling basic expectations (“You followed the instructions? Congratulations! Here’s your sticker.” “You didn’t get into a fight today? Congratulations! Here’s your sticker.”), but also delegitimized sincere feedback and praise for effortful improvement. This operant conditioning thinking led to a revival of external rewards to get kids to do things in schools, which in turn led to the eventual understanding that intrinsic motivation is not always driven by external reward. (The more than 7,500 teacher resources for sticker rewards options on Amazon.com alone indicate how many teachers have been persuaded that giving out stickers will keep kids on track.)

External rewards can take many forms, including positive praise and feedback, tangible rewards (such as a sticker, candy, money, or praise from parents or peers) or pressures (being tape-recorded or watched to be sure you comply or fined for bad behavior).[4] People can be extrinsically motivated in introjected fashions, such as going to school because of societal or cultural expectations, but the best way to instill motivation is through positive intrinsic forces (resolving a real-life problem of personal interest, learning to play music for the pleasure it gives, or being allowed to choose how and why to approach an assignment)[5] as this is the only way to assure potential transfer or future use of the learned competency.

Where the Myth Comes From

Many teachers believe their sole job is to keep kids motivated and on task, as reflected in numerous teacher guides (Motivating Students Who Don’t Care: Successful Techniques for Educators;[6] Practical & Easy Ways to Motivate Your Students (A+ Teacher Idea Book); [7] 50 Quick Ways to Motivate and Engage Your Students[8]). While it is true that students perceive a teacher’s own level of motivation through social contagion,[9] it is not true that rewards— or punishments— need to be connected to the student-teacher relationship. It would be simpler to believe that teachers held all the bargaining chips for motivation in their own actions, but this is not true.

Every student comes to class with a lot of personal baggage; his own motivation for schoolwork is influenced not only by what the teacher does, but also by what his past experience has been with the subject, what he ate (or didn’t eat) for breakfast, his relationships with his parents and peers, and how much he slept (or didn’t) the night before, among a host of other factors. Motivation is not as simple as offering a reward. Teachers need to better understand the complex mechanisms of motivation to better leverage their role in student learning. While the teacher is the determining factor in establishing the right learning environment by demonstrating his or her enthusiasm for the subject matter and genuine concern for the students,[10] external rewards are not necessarily part of the magic formula to guarantee student motivation.

What We Know Now

We now know that autonomous motivation, or intrinsic structures for motivation, are much more powerfully associated with positive self-concept and academic achievement than external rewards.[11] In a sense, being an autonomous learner is its own reward. Self-determination theory tries to unite the best ways of using external motivators for intrinsic motivation, and suggests that teachers leverage the balance between what they can do for the students and what the students must do for themselves.[12]

In school-age populations, it is clear that punitive, externally driven motivators are associated with lower levels of intrinsic motivation for things like prosocial behavior, meaning that they are less desirable than intrinsic motivators.[13] Bear and colleagues’ research showed that helping students find their own intrinsic motivators— taking them on a walk and having them identify problems in their neighborhood they want to resolve and celebrating their success with them, for example— is more powerful than just supplying external praise.

According to Augustyniak and colleagues’ article, “Intrinsic Motivation: An Overlooked Component for Student Success,” Students with greater levels of intrinsic motivation demonstrate strong conceptual learning, improved memory, and high overall achievement in school.[14] These students are more likely to experience a state of deep task immersion and peak performance.[15] Studies have also shown that students with higher intrinsic motivation are also more persistent.[16] In fact, intrinsic motivation is a powerful factor in performance, persistence to learn, and productivity.[17]

Clearly, intrinsic motivation is effective in spurring student achievement. But perhaps most important of all, the research clarifies that the teacher’s role is confined to creating the circumstances under which the best learning occurs, rather than providing rewards themselves. Students need to learn to identify their own motivators, rather than relying on teachers for motivation.

[1] Cerasoli, Nicklin & Ford, 2014

[2] Briggs, 1975

[3] Hattie, 2012; 2015

[4] Deci, Koestner & Ryan, 1999; Lepper, Henderlong & Gingras, 1999

[5] Cerasoli, Nicklin & Ford, 2014

[6] Mendler, 2009

[7] Gruber & Gruber, 2002

[8] Gershon, 2015

[9] Radel, Sarrazin, Legrain & Wild, 2010

[10] Hattie, 2012

[11] Emmanuel, Adam, Josephine & Solomon, 2014

[12] Ryan & Deci, 2016

[13] Bear, Slaughter, Mantz & Farley-Ripple, 2017

[14] Gotfried, 1990

[15] Shernoff, Abdi, Anderson & Csikszentmihalyi, 2014; Shernoff, Csikszentmihalyi, Schneider & Shernoff, 2003

[16] Hardre & Reeve, 2003; Vallerand, Pelletier, Blais, Briere, Senecal & Vallieres, 1992

[17] Grant, 2008; Augustyniak, Ables, Guilford, Lujan, Cortright & DiCarlo, 2016, p. 465

from World of Psychology https://ift.tt/2W8ugKt via IFTTT

#IFTTT #World of Psychology

[psychotherapyconsultants]

Neuromyth: Intrinsic Motivation is Driven by External Reward

One of the best motivators to learn is personal satisfaction.[1] But where does this internal drive come from? Many believe that students are motivated to learn because of what the people around them do, called extrinsic motivation.

Starting in the 1970s, it was popular to believe the key to success lay within the now famous self- esteem movement.[2] This has proved, to a certain extent, to be validated by more recent research: A person’s own belief in his or her ability to learn actually influences learning outcomes.[3] What has not panned out in the research is the belief that the development of positive self-esteem in children depends upon praise and positive reinforcements from adults and peers. So, what does makes a child believe in herself?

In a very mistaken interpretation of the research, teachers began giving children stickers and rewards for everything they did to “boost their self-esteem.” This misguided practice not only led to disingenuous acts of rewarding kids for simply fulfilling basic expectations (“You followed the instructions? Congratulations! Here’s your sticker.” “You didn’t get into a fight today? Congratulations! Here’s your sticker.”), but also delegitimized sincere feedback and praise for effortful improvement. This operant conditioning thinking led to a revival of external rewards to get kids to do things in schools, which in turn led to the eventual understanding that intrinsic motivation is not always driven by external reward. (The more than 7,500 teacher resources for sticker rewards options on Amazon.com alone indicate how many teachers have been persuaded that giving out stickers will keep kids on track.)

External rewards can take many forms, including positive praise and feedback, tangible rewards (such as a sticker, candy, money, or praise from parents or peers) or pressures (being tape-recorded or watched to be sure you comply or fined for bad behavior).[4] People can be extrinsically motivated in introjected fashions, such as going to school because of societal or cultural expectations, but the best way to instill motivation is through positive intrinsic forces (resolving a real-life problem of personal interest, learning to play music for the pleasure it gives, or being allowed to choose how and why to approach an assignment)[5] as this is the only way to assure potential transfer or future use of the learned competency.

Where the Myth Comes From

Many teachers believe their sole job is to keep kids motivated and on task, as reflected in numerous teacher guides (Motivating Students Who Don’t Care: Successful Techniques for Educators;[6] Practical & Easy Ways to Motivate Your Students (A+ Teacher Idea Book); [7] 50 Quick Ways to Motivate and Engage Your Students[8]). While it is true that students perceive a teacher’s own level of motivation through social contagion,[9] it is not true that rewards— or punishments— need to be connected to the student-teacher relationship. It would be simpler to believe that teachers held all the bargaining chips for motivation in their own actions, but this is not true.

Every student comes to class with a lot of personal baggage; his own motivation for schoolwork is influenced not only by what the teacher does, but also by what his past experience has been with the subject, what he ate (or didn’t eat) for breakfast, his relationships with his parents and peers, and how much he slept (or didn’t) the night before, among a host of other factors. Motivation is not as simple as offering a reward. Teachers need to better understand the complex mechanisms of motivation to better leverage their role in student learning. While the teacher is the determining factor in establishing the right learning environment by demonstrating his or her enthusiasm for the subject matter and genuine concern for the students,[10] external rewards are not necessarily part of the magic formula to guarantee student motivation.

What We Know Now

We now know that autonomous motivation, or intrinsic structures for motivation, are much more powerfully associated with positive self-concept and academic achievement than external rewards.[11] In a sense, being an autonomous learner is its own reward. Self-determination theory tries to unite the best ways of using external motivators for intrinsic motivation, and suggests that teachers leverage the balance between what they can do for the students and what the students must do for themselves.[12]

In school-age populations, it is clear that punitive, externally driven motivators are associated with lower levels of intrinsic motivation for things like prosocial behavior, meaning that they are less desirable than intrinsic motivators.[13] Bear and colleagues’ research showed that helping students find their own intrinsic motivators— taking them on a walk and having them identify problems in their neighborhood they want to resolve and celebrating their success with them, for example— is more powerful than just supplying external praise.

According to Augustyniak and colleagues’ article, “Intrinsic Motivation: An Overlooked Component for Student Success,” Students with greater levels of intrinsic motivation demonstrate strong conceptual learning, improved memory, and high overall achievement in school.[14] These students are more likely to experience a state of deep task immersion and peak performance.[15] Studies have also shown that students with higher intrinsic motivation are also more persistent.[16] In fact, intrinsic motivation is a powerful factor in performance, persistence to learn, and productivity.[17]

Clearly, intrinsic motivation is effective in spurring student achievement. But perhaps most important of all, the research clarifies that the teacher’s role is confined to creating the circumstances under which the best learning occurs, rather than providing rewards themselves. Students need to learn to identify their own motivators, rather than relying on teachers for motivation.

[1] Cerasoli, Nicklin & Ford, 2014

[2] Briggs, 1975

[3] Hattie, 2012; 2015

[4] Deci, Koestner & Ryan, 1999; Lepper, Henderlong & Gingras, 1999

[5] Cerasoli, Nicklin & Ford, 2014

[6] Mendler, 2009

[7] Gruber & Gruber, 2002

[8] Gershon, 2015

[9] Radel, Sarrazin, Legrain & Wild, 2010

[10] Hattie, 2012

[11] Emmanuel, Adam, Josephine & Solomon, 2014

[12] Ryan & Deci, 2016

[13] Bear, Slaughter, Mantz & Farley-Ripple, 2017

[14] Gotfried, 1990

[15] Shernoff, Abdi, Anderson & Csikszentmihalyi, 2014; Shernoff, Csikszentmihalyi, Schneider & Shernoff, 2003

[16] Hardre & Reeve, 2003; Vallerand, Pelletier, Blais, Briere, Senecal & Vallieres, 1992

[17] Grant, 2008; Augustyniak, Ables, Guilford, Lujan, Cortright & DiCarlo, 2016, p. 465

from World of Psychology https://psychcentral.com/blog/neuromyth-intrinsic-motivation-is-driven-by-external-reward/

#World of Psychology

[womens-anonymous]

what's your net-net-net worth?

I think I need to start all of my dates in honor of Drake’s “In my feelings” track- What’s your net worth? From there I can determine if I should continue relations not solely based on the value provided, but more importantly, if that value matches up with his market value. What I’ve come to learn about men is that they severely lack the internal reflection of what they can and are willing to contribute to a partnership. This lack of internal reflection causes them to over-estimate their market value. Over-estimating mens are likes of 50 Cent, Future, Ryan Lotche, and Bow Wow whereas the contrary are the likes of Lance Gross, Denzel Washington, and Ryan Gosling.  Over-estimation of one’s market value can cause them to think they “God’s ONLY gift to the world”, more than worthy to have access to any woman they desire, also find women and their contributions to be easily disposable or taken for granted. Typically women under-estimate their market value because they don’t want to intimate or “scare a man away”. Women would rather play small, into the comfort of a man’s ego because it’s safe and non confrontational. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with women that play small or men that think they are God’s gift, but if these mannerism are done at the expense of yourself, or to degrade your significant other or at the approval of your significant other, that is not okayyy.

I attribute this observation to familial and societal conditioning of women being givers and men as being takers. Women will cook, clean, go to work, wrangle children, and lay it down in the bedroom all for the man that gets the big piece of chicken for dinner. While men lay in the position of expectancy- for the big piece of chicken, adoration from his lover, praise of for his professional accomplishments and wealth attainment, your forgiveness without resentment, for you to never leave or forsake him, and for you to make yourself cum! Women typically position themselves to give and prove that they are worthy of what I call the immaculate transaction. Now the immaculate transaction is not a wedding ring, no.  Its the day a man decides to give of themselves. And when I say give, nothing of material like flowers, dinner or stuff. The act of giving is to relinquish the power of knowing why something is needed, yet drowns, sacrifices, or fulfills that need knowing it meets the expectation of someone. The gift of love is to drown to something bigger than yourself. To give without the expectancy for something in return. Giving requires one to choose, want and desire to be something better than. This act of giving should feel like an out of body experience. This doesn’t have to be something big like commitment or love, it can simply be unrequited support or consistent genuine care, hell, even an orgasm! Doing such a thing requires a man to be vulnerable, willing, and fearless. I don’t see this in the men I’ve been dating as of lately.  I’ve encountered an array of men at different phases of their life, and what they all have in common is this arrogant pursuit to uncover my net worth and assets for their gain only. And It’s actually a violating experience. I’ve been on dates that could have been mistaken for job interviews. The interview question assess my skillset, student loan debt, and my contributions to his prestige. When I turn around and ask, “what do you bring to the table?”, I get a lot of uh’s, aggressive retorts, “what you means” or if I’m lucky “you got me fucked up’s”.  This one guy’s investigative journalism skills was so tough, I wasn’t sure if he was inquiring the essence of me or the presence of me. I think there is nothing more beautiful than for a man to allow me to reveal myself to him, as he should do to me. It’s truly frustrating and disheartening because I don't think men are aware of vitriol they inflict when they run through you- your emotional headspace, your intellectual bedroom, your beautiful heart to then depart your home with nasty parting words- “ I ain’t like the way yo shit was set up in here anyway.”

Men take and take, and women break and break. I was that woman that gave so much and neglected myself and sanity. But I gave up this form of self destruction after the last one came through and ran a muck. Like a fool in love, I would let him back in countless times. And he shitted on my shit countless times. But that last time, I had enough. I didn't let him back in because I recognized that we weren’t building a partnered space.  All of that shit in that “partnered” house was my shit- and I had enough of him shitting on MY SHIT. Its so crucial for women to claim ownership of the home they built within themselves and recognize the possessions they lended to the partnered home. Ownership allows us to defend, by any means necessary, or share because we know where it comes from and has the ability for rebirth. Women are constantly dying to themselves, to be rebirth again. Thats the essence of a woman; fiercely protective yet willing and able to give light/life. That man who acted a fool in MY house was simultaneously building his own house, however, it wasn’t ready for my presence, hence why I never got an invitation nor could he contribute to our “partnered” space. He wasn’t ready to give of himself; He wasn’t ready to share his space, bedroom, heart with me at full access. His ego guarded his front door until I stopped knocking (I was actually banging on that door). Not until I walked away, accepted that the immaculate transaction was not to come, He began to give, but by that time it was too late for me.

An article titled “Black Men aren’t providers because allow them to be contributors” was circling my newsfeed this past week and caused me to reflect  on my contribution to the enabling of men’s subpar, unequivocally matched engagement with me. The article caused me to reflect on a recent discussion I had with a guy, who decided to stop dating me this past January.... We agreed to meet for dinner and discuss a business challenge I’m encountering and could use his help on. As we are walking to the restaurant, small talk quickly leads to a “proposal” he’d like to give me over dinner. Over dinner, he proposes that we have a child, “send it off to the soccer academy in London, and recoup our invest by the age 16 when he joins the league. Tax shelter you know” The tone and facial expression this man had during the proposal was serious and calculated in every way. Because I’m ignorant, I laughed in his face and said “you have got to be kidding me, yo, you cant be serious.” And he wasn’t playing- he proceeded to sell the idea to me “I can take care of us, you are young enough to get your body back, we’d have a tax credit for the kid, you have good hair, your family would like me...” Not once did this man ever inquire my aspirations of a family, partnership, willingness, fears, and vulnerabilities- even when we did date.  All he knew and care to know was my “financial portfolio” because he already performed a risk analysis on it. Results came back that I was a low risk case because I got goals and shit to lose, just like him. Therefore the balanced risk would be shared. Once I got the shocking giggles out of me, I told him, “We would and could never work because we don’t share the same views and goals for our life projections.”

Don’t get me wrong, he’s a sweetheart. His gentle, light hearted demeanor reminds me of Sterling K Brown’s character on This is Us Television Show. On paper, he checks out- Master’s Degree, good work ethic, generous, and socially aware. But emotionally bankrupt, spiritually deprived, and hopelessly securing any love with the least effort. These traits are the archetype of takers. All they bring to the table is the “ability to provide.” “Provide” in his case, is money, but some of these other dudes say that word and mean bullshit, drama, confusion. Check it, there is nothing wrong with bringing home the bacon fellas, and ladies if that works for you, please do you boo! But for me, that’s not all I require and deserve. As a high earning, academically excelling Black woman in America, I recognize that I am apart of a demographic that is now surpassing the economic and educational threshold black men have yet to surpass. I don't say this braggadociously- I say it with great pride as I know that I am a descent of slave women, that transitioned  into housemaids, then eventually entered industry’s that never wanted us like Science, Technology, Mathematics and Engineering, all while taking care of some muhfuggin kids! It is my duty to widen the door of opportunity for my Black brothers that have been stripped and undergirded of their contribution to society because of the manifestation of slavery, voters rights, mass incarceration, and systems of oppression. I get it, the shits hard and fucked up. Instead of having a chip on your shoulder because you “pulled yourself up by the bootstraps”, “aren’t a statistic”, “ have a master’s Degree and earring six figures”, “ not ready to give it all up for the wrong chick”, try sharing, giving, and being more than what you and world expects of you. It doesn’t hurt to give life/love, die by your own sword, knowing that you will be reborn again to see another day, give another day. Simply saying you want to be a financial provider in a family household may not cut it with a millennial Black women. Leaving the laborious emotional development for the mother to accomplish with y'all offspring aint enough no more. Picking up the kids when Mom can’t, aint cool no more. Your preference to go dutch on a date isn’t going to save you from rejection. You earning more than me doesn’t substitute for your lack of emotional responsibility in the building of a relationship or family. Me earning more than you doesn't subject you to domestic duties either. 

I’ve come to understand that equality in genders and their roles may never be, but the dynamic equitable balance is something I’m willing to negotiate. Therefore ladies, know your true market value and demand an equitable contract with these mens. Don’t get caught up with the car sales pitch; ask the hard questions, seek the absolute truth. Hopefully this will force men to reconcile their shitty marketing scheme, humble thy self, and commits to a transaction that is cashless yet doesn’t bounce.

Be safe out here

-Issa Molly xo

[loycereiber]

Utah Divorce Jurisdiction

When you need to get divorced, usually, you call a divorce lawyer to talk about your situation and move forward. In determining how to get you divorced, the lawyer must determine where jurisdiction lies. Jurisdiction is a complicated issue.  Actually, it’s a whole bunch of issues all jumbled together.  There is personal jurisdiction, subject matter jurisdiction, and then there is in rem jurisdiction.  If that weren’t complicated enough, there’s also a similar issued called venue.   Before you determine Venue, you have to figure out the proper jurisdiction.

There are many things that are relevant to where you should file your divorce, such as:

Whether one or both spouses live in Utah, and how long they have lived there?

Which Utah County each spouse lives in, and how long have they lived there?

If one or both spouses are absent from Utah but still have contacts with Utah, what is the nature and extent of your contacts?

Whether either husband or wife is in the military

Whether you have children

Whether you want the court to make orders regarding support, real property or personal property, or just to grant a divorce?

Do you want a divorce, dissolution, annulment or legal separation?

IN REM JURISDICTION FOR UTAH DIVORCE

In Rem is a latin term.  When used in the divorce context, it refers to the court’s jurisdiction over the marital status.  So a court may have in rem jurisdiction to grant a divorce, but no personal jurisdiction over one of the parties, their money and their property, and/or no subject matter jurisdiction over the parties’ children.  In that case, the court could ONLY make orders that the parties are divorced.  Everything else (child support, spousal support, custody, property division, etc.) would remain in as it is, with no orders until somebody files something to get those orders in the proper jurisdiction.

Why would you want to file a divorce in a court that can only end the marriage and not make any orders regarding child support, custody and property?  Actually, there are lots of reasons.

The first and most obvious would be thata person wants a divorce and does not know where their spouse is.  If you have LOOKED for your spouse (yes, which means contacting the inlaws if you have their phone number or e-mail), tried several methods to find them and been unsuccessful, you can serve your spouse with divorce papers by publication in the newspaper.  You will have to file an affidavit with the court telling them all the methods you used to try to locate your spouse, and what the results were.  Once publication is completed, this is “good service” but ONLY for ending the marriage.

Another reason would be that you and your spouse don’t have any money, property or children to divide, so ending the marriage is the only thing you care about.

A third reason would be that even though you DO have money, property or children with your spouse, you have tried your best to serve your spouse through other methods (mail, sheriff, process server), and you have not been able to do so.  If you are not sure that you have your spouse’s correct address, you MAY be able to serve your spouse by publication and go forward with the divorce.

Free Consultation with Divorce Lawyer in Utah

If you have a question about divorce law or if you need to start or defend against a divorce case in Utah call Ascent Law at [phone]. We will help you.

Ascent Law LLC8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite CWest Jordan, Utah 84088 United StatesTelephone: [phone]

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Source: http://www.ascentlawfirm.com/utah-divorce-jurisdiction/

[ronaldmrashid]

The One Ingredient Necessary For Achieving Financial Independence

A couple FIRE (Financial Independence Retire Early) friends and I were having some beers the other night when we got to discussing what were the things that most helped us achieve financial independence at a relatively early age. Here were some of the responses:

Saving aggressively

Investing in stocks and real estate

Earning side income

Taking risks in our careers

Working ungodly long hours

Relocating to areas with huge job growth despite the higher cost of living

Leveraging the internet

Starting a business

All of these things helped me leave the rat race early as well. But the #1 thing that drove me, which nobody mentioned, was FEAR. More specifically, the fear of failure. Let me share some examples to explain what I mean. Then perhaps you can share your own in the comments section below. 

Fear As The Greatest Motivator

Childhood Expectations

My parents told me at an early age that academics was the main way to a better life because I wasn’t going to become a professional tennis player. They instilled in me a fear that if I was a C-student, I’d only be able to live a C-or-worse lifestyle.

Not only did I fear living a mediocre lifestyle as an adult, I also feared disappointing my parents. I was always getting into trouble as a kid, and each time I did, I saw the shame in their eyes. I finally stopped being a degenerate once I went to college.

Throughout my childhood, my parents worked long hours. I especially felt bad for my mother who didn’t particularly enjoy the foreign service work she did. Foreign service work was my father’s dream, not my mother’s.

I remember visiting her at one day in at the US Embassy in Kuala Lumpur as a surprise. I didn’t quite understand what she did, only that she worked in the cultural attaché department. She was always so chipper at work, and her colleagues always sang her praises. It felt like a wonderland to roam around the halls of what seemed like a fortress at the time.

When I arrived, she was tidying up the magazines on the coffee table. Instead of working in her own office, my mom worked in the reception area outside of her bosses big office. Oh, I got it now. Maybe foreign service work isn’t so great after all. I was 12 years old.

She told me how she had sacrificed her dream of becoming a biologist by foregoing a graduate scholarship from Duke University to marry my father. She still had what most would call a great adventure. But I knew deep down she will always wonder what could have been. If my mother was going to give up her professional dreams for her children, I damn well wasn’t going to disappoint her!

Work

Working in the financial services industry since 1999 always made me paranoid about losing my job. The industry is highly cyclical, which means during down cycles, there are always multiple rounds of layoffs. Without a job, I would feel like a failure. And without a steady paycheck, I wouldn’t be able to pay my mortgages on time.

The fear of being one of the thousands of people let go during the dotcom bust and the housing crisis led me to work extra long hours in order to add as much value as possible to my firm. Whenever I felt miserable working at 11pm to catch my Asia-based colleagues after getting in before 6am, I always reminded myself of friends who were blown out. Then I’d just gut it through one day at at time.

It wasn’t until I started listening to the lifestyles of other people working in other industries did I realize how abnormal was it to always be in fear of losing your job. But it was this perpetual fear that made me save 50% – 80% of my paycheck every year, figure out the best way to invest my money, and create outlets to one day have the option to escape from the corporate world. If I was comfortable at work, I’d ironically still be working.

Related: Overcoming “The One More Year Syndrome” To Do Something New

Blogging

I enjoy blogging. I really do. Every morning feels like Christmas because it’s always so fun to read what other people have to say.

However, there’s really no good reason to continue publishing 3X a week anymore. Today’s posts reach 100X as many people as they once did eight long years ago. But because I publicly made a commitment to write 3X a week for 10 years in a row, however, I fear being labeled as weak or a failure if I don’t follow through.

You guys don’t know how many times I’ve wanted to just pass out at midnight, but forced myself to write a new article until 2:30am just so I could meet my publishing objective. I have this fear of letting you down, especially those of you may be going through a difficult time financially. I remember how soothing it was to read and interact with other folks during the financial crisis.

For the longest time, I’ve sent the message to never fail due to a lack of effort because hard work requires no skill. Therefore, if I stop working hard, then I’m just another hypocrite who doesn’t follow his own advice. July 1, 2019 can’t come soon enough so I can relax a little more!

Related: Why Blogging Is The Best Business In The World

Society

Believe it or not, as a minority, it’s a little harder to get ahead when there is hardly anybody who looks like you in leadership positions.

When I lived in various Asian countries growing up, I was the majority. Everything felt normal. But when I arrived in Virginia as a high school freshman, the contrasting reality of being a minority  instead of a majority became clearly apparent. Overnight it seemed I had to address stereotypes, listen to racial slurs, and endure various forms of discrimination that I had never encountered while living in Taiwan, Malaysia, or Japan. You learn to just suck it up after a while and move forward.

I feared being pigeon holed as a Asian guy who was only good at math and science. Therefore, I worked extra hard on my athletics and went to a liberal arts school to become a more well-rounded person. I wasn’t going to let my minority status keep me from achieving the lifestyle I wanted. But growing up, I feared society would never let me be who I really wanted to become.

Related: Income By Race: Why Do Asians Have The Highest Earnings?

Money

Ever since I lived in Malaysia as a 11-13 year old, I’ve been hyper aware of the haves and the have-nots. To see some of my friends live so poorly really wigged me out as a kid. I often questioned why life was so unfair for so many people. As a result, I made a promise never to take any job or financial opportunity for granted. I wanted my kids to grow up being able to study and play rather than being forced to work to help support the family.

After you’ve achieved your retirement number, will you continue to work as hard? For most folks, I think they may decide to take things down a notch. For me, however, I’ve made it a priority to press on, as if I am always starting from scratch.

Growing up seeing poverty on a daily basis makes one afraid of one day losing everything. You’re always wondering when your luck will run out. And the longer you go without any unfortunate events, the more you brace yourself for cataclysmic disaster.

Related: The Average Net Worth For The Above Average Person

Physical Fitness

At age 40, despite already having sufficient money and a family, the reason why I haven’t let myself go is not due to pride or vanity, but because I fear health problems and and an early death. I know way too many people who have come down with high blood pressure, high cholesterol, strokes, heart disease, fatty liver disease, and diabetes due to poor diet and obesity.

My obese friend told me that because he doesn’t fear an early death and has no family depending on him, he’s happy to eat whatever he wants. He enjoys food more than he enjoys the chance at a healthier life. “If I die early, so be it! I’m not going to deny myself my greatest pleasure just for the unknown chance of living until 90.”

I know people who are vegans or who aggressively count calories. Wow how they restrict their lifestyles for health. Ironically, those in the worst shape seem to have the most courage to live the good life without caring what anybody else thinks.

As a parent, the #1 fear I have is not being able to live long enough to see my son grow up to be a happy, independent man. Therefore, I am on a mission to fit into my 32″ 33″ inch jeans for the next 25 years.

Related: Track Everything! We Are Eating And Spending Way Too Much

Harness Your Fears For A Better Life

As time passes, I’ve been able to be less afraid. Academics, work, and societal fears are behind me now. The fear of not being a good blogger is also fading since I’m 8 years into a 10 year commitment. I probably won’t fall into poverty due to the financial buffers I’ve created for my financial buffers. However, this doesn’t stop me from trying to earn more since my fear of poverty is so deep-rooted.

My greatest fear now is not being a good enough father. I pray I will have the patience to teach him how to always think of others first. I hope I have the kindness to be encouraging, and never critical. One day, maybe my son will tell me he couldn’t have asked for a better dad. But before that day comes, I must earn his love.

Don’t let fear paralyze you. Instead, use fear as motivation to do better. The fear in our heads is often greater than reality. I’ve found this to be true time and time again.

Related: What Does Financial Independence Feel Like?

Readers, what are some of your fears that make you stronger? Do you use fear as a motivator? Why are we so afraid of taking a chance in the developed world? What are some things you fear? 

from http://www.financialsamurai.com/the-one-ingredient-necessary-for-achieving-financial-independence/

#Financial Samurai