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#who has me on a green OTTB that i guarantee the vast majority of the girls on the team would not be able to ride well
alcego · 3 years
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so i've been waffling abt whether or not i'll go back to the equestrian team next semester (there have been Issues™ that i'm not fond of) & i'm honestly thinking that if i do i'm gonna start doing western & drop their english practices bc:
western makes me open my hips just by virtue of stirrup placement & riding style
if i do at some point meet show qualifications for the western team i won't have to deal with the fucking batshit IHSA standards for hunters, which can be boiled down to "your eq should look good but also if you're not a twig we'll automatically place you lower bc it's 'not the right look'" (legit had a judge tell me to look into thigh slimming exercises bc i don't currently have the slim, streamlined look they prefer; she was out of line to say this, but do note that a judge is more than welcome to say "you don't have the look we're looking for" which means "we don't care how good a rider you are if you're fat")
western is actually pretty fun? and i feel like i'll learn more from the team's coach since she's primarily a western rider/trainer (& also i despise the way she runs english practices but that's neither here nor there lol)
our horses are 90% wanglish anyway, so at least this way i won't be asking a horse to do english things they've clearly never been trained to do
like i'm not thrilled with the team as a general rule of thumb but i want to give it another shot now that we've got new officers & things will be lightening up as we move past quarantine & if i still don't vibe i'll just dip bc it ain't worth it & i have a really good coach who i enjoy working with & is good at what she does outside of the team anyway
#mostly i'm just tired lol#the amount of drama this team makes is unreal like ok. ok. we get it.#had my actual literal coach talking shit about me WHILE I WAS RIDING BY HER and i got SO mad#bc a) she'd NEVER given me any feedback on the thing she was shittalking about & b) it was literally just. such a rude thing to say.#WHILE I WAS RIGHT THERE#like. okay.#''can't believe AJ's finally able to sit the canter on CARL [bounciest horse fucking alive]'' after they'd had me on a horse who#everyone knows is fucking HARD to sit properly FOR SEVERAL WEEKS IN A ROW#& they also treat me like i don't know anything? which is infuriating & makes me feel condescended to#especially bc i go to team practice the day after riding w/my other trainer#who has me on a green OTTB that i guarantee the vast majority of the girls on the team would not be able to ride well#and i placed HIGH in jumping classes with that horse in the open show#& they're still like ''oh let's tell AJ this very basic thing abt riding bc Clearly They Don't Know'' even tho i DO & i'm usually already#doing the thing#but i have a very subtle hand & seat (smth my trainer knows; she's seen me do no-stirrup work & remarked that i make it look easy)#(i just have a soft hand and communicate mostly through my seat which means that it looks like i'm not doing much when in reality i'm#working approx 10 billion dif things at the same time)#and i just hate being treated like i need to be spoken down to when ik the major issues they have with me are#a) i'm fat. i don't 'have the look.'#and b) they didn't see me ride until i was coming back from a literal broken foot#so i wasn't at my best and was actively rehabbing my leg since i lost a TON of muscle mass#& they were like ''oh well clearly this is what we should expect from AJ as a rider'' even tho they fucking Knew.#ANYWAY#i'm gonna talk it over w/my sister some more over the summer#but i'm not really hopeful about this team#our coach has been brought before the dean several times if that tells u anything#ugh#personal
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