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#which i say being a person who used to count calories
phantomrose96 · 1 year
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I think one of my least favorite Reddit personalities is what I'm gonna call Destitution Superiority.
It's a pretty disturbingly popular mindset I encounter frequently on Reddit. The kind of people who are like "Yeah I always save 75% of my income and I do this by never buying any single thing I do not need" "I've cut out 100% of processed sugar from my entire diet and it's great for my body" "I spend (absurdly long) time at the gym and eat (absurdly few) calories every day which I weigh and count it's really turned my life around."
And the thing is like, I believe them when they say doing this makes them feel good! I believe this satisfies a primal need for accomplishing a difficult task, for being proud of their efforts, for feeling superior to people who are simply too "lazy"/"impulse-driven"/"ignorant" to do the same.
...But by god. What's the end game? Do these people want to hit 80 years old and look back on their entire life pride which was just... self-deprivation? Do they want to look back and think "thank god I never once tried a delicious piece of cake" "thank god I missed my friend's birthday party so I could hit my gym goals" "thank god I'm dying with millions in the bank which I never let myself use or enjoy in life"
They're defining themselves by what they refuse to let themselves have. They're seeking accomplishment in being less, and doing less, and consuming and spending less so they can soak in the ephemeral brain chemicals that say "you did good by denying yourself this experience." And what happens when they crack? When day 487 of no desserts they feel weak and have a cupcake and hate themselves? And they go back to their hivemind which tells them they were simply weak and need to get back on the horse. It's sad. It's sad to watch.
And it is so very dangerous for how easily people will get sucked in. How extremely easy it is to blur the lines between "healthy, responsible behavior" and "cultish adherence to denying yourself pieces of your own life." They don't recognize that line themselves. Because if you try to bring this up with them, they deflect as if you were suggesting they plunge themselves deep into the opposite obsession. "Oh you think I should just spend every single dime I earn and end up in debt and broke?" "What are you suggesting I just let my health go because it's easier to sit on the couch every day."
No. I just think the narrative around "responsible" behaviors of finance and health needs to address the far-too-pervasive phenomenon of people overdoing it with cultish adherence, and locking themselves out of life, experiences, and joy, because the chemical rush of choke-hold control on their life--(or worse, the fear of slipping and being seen as one of the irresponsible others)--blinds them to the fact that they earnestly want to shrink the one and only life they have to live.
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stvolanis · 2 months
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Hearts & Kisses
(I have multiple asks in my inbox for Farleigh x Plus size! Reader, so here y’all go!!)
PAIRINGS: Farleigh Start x Fem! Plus size! Reader
WARNINGS: foul language, body dysmorphia,slight angst, emotional reader, crying, mentions of blood, fluff, Farleigh being a sweetheart, pet names, use of the word “fat”, people are fucking rude
NSFW WARNINGS: sub!reader, soft Dom!Farleigh, praise, body worship but in a cutesy way, slight perv!Farleigh, slight nipple play, emotional sex, groping, making out, p in v sex, oral (f receiving), cream pie, overall cute sex
˚ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ˚
Your whole life, it feels as though the world was somehow molded to revolve around your weight. It was like the people around you didn’t allow you to have any other kind of personality rather than just being “the fat friend”, to put it bluntly.
Venetia was your best friend, but even she, sometimes, made you upset when it came to that aspect.
Like when she’d complain to you about how she was gaining weight, and needed to start counting her calories again. Or when something wouldn’t fit her the way she wanted it to cause of the faintest chub of her stomach, which honestly suited her petite body.
Having lived in her shadow, it was no surprise that every man you’ve ever liked, ended up liking Venetia instead. It was easier to like Venetia. She was pretty, skinny, outgoing, the whole package deal in the form of a raging she-demon. Any man would be dumb to pass up any offer Venetia laid to them.
She comforted you, of course, and knew of your insecurities and struggles you faced of being bigger than some. She tried her best to make you feel better about it, in her own odd Venetia way, and you loved her dearly for that—but it just wasn’t enough. You longed for men to look at you the way they did her.
You knew you shouldn’t have, but sometimes you wished Venetia was the token “fat friend”. Even if it were just for a day, so she could truly understand what it was like being in your shoes. Maybe then she wouldn’t tell you that you were over exaggerating when you cried over gaining 3 more pounds.
You were tired of the look on old, decaying couples faces when you’d be sitting at a restaurant. The clear look of judgment, disgust and hostility written all over their faces when you’d order food of your choice. You knew what they were thinking without them even having to say it. It made you feel like shit.
You stopped eating in restaurants, and in front of people in general. You order all your clothes online to save the embarrassment of having to feel the disappointment of not being able to fit into something, while prying eyes mock and belittle you till you exit.
You were tired of living the life you lived. Tired of the body you had. Tired of every little imperfection and flaw that you had.
The mirror was your worst enemy, a constant reminder. A vision flashes through the eyes that stare back at you of the life you wanted. Happy. Rich. Popular. Married, with a plethora of beautiful children who you prayed never had to go through your struggles.
You were so focused, so concerned with the hatred you held for the body you were given—that you didn’t even stop to think for even just a moment, that maybe, there was someone out there who adored every part of you.
Farleigh Start, being one of them.
From the moment he laid his eyes on you, he’s loved you ever since.
From afar, he watched you in Venetias shadow—seemingly the only one who’s ever seen you. From tears falling down at the party, being the saddest person in the crowded room; to watching the way you avoided mirrors in the Saltburn mansion like they were the plague. How sad you were, was a trait he could easily tell.
He knew what your troubles were, it wasn’t hard to figure out. He just wished you saw yourself through his eyes, and maybe then you’d understand just how beautiful you were.
You were funny, and so beautiful; definitely more beautiful than his bimbo of a cousin. You were smart, which he took notice of when he saw you reading a damn book rather than engaging in a valentines party back at Oxford. He seen your scores, and knew you took school seriously. A scholarship girl, through and through. But he thought it was cute.
There was never a flaw in you, and he only ever saw you for what you were; a genuine, caring and sweet person. Never did he pay mind to what everyone else so blatantly gawked at, acting as if they’d never seen a plus size person. How ignorant of them, he’d always say. How vile.
Tonight was special, a welcome to the new boy that Felix brought home from Oxford—Oliver, was his name. A peculiar boy, to Farleigh, but an easy friend to you.
You sat down on the far end of the couch, picking at the skin around your nails absentmindedly while the others around you drank wine from the bottle, singing a song you didn’t care to listen to. Every once and a while you’d look up at Venetia, just to find her giving you the thumbs up as she took one of her playthings for the night to her chambers with a dorky smile.
Farleigh watched you from across the room. Always from across the room, never close enough for you to realize he was ever even there. You complained about being in Venetias shadow, yet Farleigh basked in yours.
You wished that men would look at you. To spare you the time of day rather than just a polite smile. But Farleigh was the one who longed for you to look at him that way. He longed for you to look at him as more than just a friend, or an admirer—he wanted you to look at him as if you were lovers.
The night was still young, as were you and Farleigh. He had been planning his approach for at least a month, finally deciding to act on his need for you. So, he watched your doe eyes watch him walk towards you with a lump in his throat. Nervous.
“Farleigh.” You greeted—the warmth and familiarity of your voice filling his ears like a melodic symphony. It was slick like honey, and gentle like a dove in midnight air. “Hey.” he fumbled out after an awkward moment of silence. You smiled.
God, that fucking smile. Anything you wanted, would be yours if you promised to smile at him like that forever. It made his knees weak—weak enough for him to take his place comfortably next to you at the end of the couch.
“How are you?” He asked, staring into your eyes, waiting for a response. You hummed as you looked down at the slightly bleeding skin around your manicured nails. “I’ve been alright.” You lied, casting your eyes up to meet his.
The glint in your eyes told him everything he needed to know. He nodded in understanding, glancing down at his hands that were nervously clamped together with sweat, which he wiped on his slacks. “You look—“ he said, before he cleared his throat from imperfections, “you look beautiful, Y/N.” He smiled.
To say you were shocked was an understatement. The words you wanted to hear slipping past his lips made your walls come crumbling down. Was it finally your turn? Your turn at a chance of happiness? It couldn’t be. This must’ve been a joke. A sick prank he was playing on you with his friends probably laughing somewhere in the room.
Your brows furrowed and Farleigh saw the clear distaste on your face begin to form. “I-“ he started, but didn’t get to finish as he watched you get up and storm out of the room.
Farleigh, in a confused haze, chased after you as you paced to your room with tears in your eyes. He shouted your name from behind you, but you didn’t dare to stop and look back till you felt his hand capture your wrist gently, pulling you to stop your fast pace.
“What’s wrong? I—w-was it something I said? Or—” he rambled on desperately. Your eyes danced across his features with resentment. “You makin’ fun of me? Huh? You think I don’t know that I’m a fucking joke already? Leave me the fuck alone, Farleigh!” You yelled out through tears.
His mouth hung agape as he shook his head in a ‘no’ manner. “W-what? What are you talking about?” He asked, waiting for an answer. You sniffled, rubbing your eyes with your free hand. “You’re making fun of me, Farleigh. Why? I thought you were different.” You huffed out.
He paused for a moment, processing just exactly what you were accusing him of, before he gives you a certain look. A look that screams ‘what the fuck?’, because seriously, what the fuck are you talking about?
“I would never do that to you. Get that out of your head. I meant what I said.” He stated, his hand moving from your wrist to hold your hand firmly. “I like you.” He professed. “I’ve liked you since I met you at Oxford. I don’t know why you think so lowly of yourself—to the point where you convince yourself that you’re not worthy of love or a happy life.” He said, matter of factly.
“You deserve a happy life and more. You deserve the fucking world at your feet. The stars and the moon. You deserve the sun and the planets that orbit it. You deserve everything you want and more, so don’t you dare fucking think for a second any less, you hear me?” He said, his hands cupping your face, forcing eye contact.
That was all it took to have you sobbing in his arms, your body flush against his. “So I’ll say it again, and as many times as I have to until you finally fucking believe me.” He kissed he top of your head as he held you close, your body shaking against his. “You’re beautiful.” He murmured out.
He lead you into your room, softly shutting the door behind the both of you. He watched you curl up on the edge of your bed, rubbing at your weeping eyes. Your little sniffles broke his heart, but he was determined to change this. To change the way you saw yourself.
He stood above you, a singular hand tilting your chin up to face him. “Let me show you just how beautiful you are.” His voice barely above a whisper, in a hopeful tone. You hesitated, for only a moment, before giving in with a nod. “I need words, honey.” He said, pushing your hair out of your face.
“Please.” You whispered back. He nodded, taking off his button down shirt, revealing his toned chest and stomach. His v-line was deep, and his happy trail prominent with faint curls. He moved to take your shirt off, but you stopped him.
“I—I don’t..” you said, your eyes unable to meet his. He sighed, dropping to his knees to become eye level with you. He held your face in his hands like he did before with a small smile. “It’s okay, baby. You’re okay.” He reassured. You let out a sigh, nodding at him as a signal that it was okay.
His large hands met the hem of your shirt, sliding it up till it was over your shoulders, and onto the floor beneath you. He laid soft kisses against the top of your breasts, nipples hidden behind a bra. His hands traveled behind you, unclamping your bra, letting it slide off of your arms, landing next to your shirt.
“Perfect.” He mumbled against you. His mouth trialed to your nipple, sucking and licking at it to his hearts content. Your perk, sensitive bud was aching in his mouth, and you released a small mewl when you felt his teeth graze over it just barely biting down. He released your nipple with a loud pop before his tongue found its way to your other nipple, giving it the same treatment as the other.
His hand groped at the breast his mouth was lapping at previously, gently pinching and pulling at your nipples. He released the nipple his mouth was working at with a loud pop, a string of saliva connecting his lips to your bud.
He gazed down at you with such admiration. It sent heat throughout your body, from the blushing of your cheeks down to your neck, and then down further more as you clenched around nothing as he laid peppery kisses to your stomach.
He traced absentmindedly around your stretch marks before planting a delicate kiss on a few of them. He kissed down till he was met with your pants, unbuttoning them agonizingly slow. When he finally slid them down your legs and onto the floor, he spread your legs open.
He gawked at the way your meaty flesh were plump through his fingers as he squeezed down on your meaty thighs. He licked and sucked at every inch of skin he could get his mouth on, sufficiently leavings a series of vampire-like hickies shamelessly on your inner thighs, only for him to see.
The prominent wet patch on your panties had his cock feel like it was suffocating in its confinements. You were insufferable; a walking, living, breathing temptation. With every innocent movement, the fat of your ass jiggled. It’s all he would watch when you’d walk in front of him, or past him and he’d have to break his neck to see.
The way your breasts bounced no matter what kind of shirt you were wearing. God, he had to go rub one out like a pervert one time because you decided to prance around in a flimsy tube top, nipples poking through on display. The self restraint he had held with you was absolutely mind boggling, yet he managed.
He was doing good, too. Up until now, when he finally had you. Your face was flushed red, all the way down to your neck. Your nipples perked and hard, craving more of his undivided attention. his finger found your panties, sliding it to the side, watching as your juices all but dripped out of your needy cunt.
“Fuckkk..” he groaned out. He pressed a kiss to your swollen clit before rubbing your bud mindlessly with his thumb in a soothing manner. “Know how needy my girl is.” He muttered, licking at your entrance, slurping at the welcoming juices that flowed out.
“Farleigh..” you whimpered out. He coped at you. “I know, honey. I know. M’gonna take care of you, baby.” His tongue swirling around your most sensitive part of your body had your eyes rolling to the back of your head in a pure euphoric feeling.
Sure, you’ve rubbed one out before, but it was never anything like this. It never felt this good, or like you were on a different fucking planet. He must’ve laced his tongue with something, because there was no way someone could do what he was doing with his tongue.
Every flick sent a shiver up your spine, and had you orbiting. Every suckle at your needy little bud that wasn’t so little when he released it from his mouth made you all the more closer to the edge of your on coming orgasm. He lapped at your juices like it was the best thing he’s ever had in his life, and to him, it was.
You tasted sweet on his tongue, and a little bitter but in a delicious way. He wanted to know what you looked like when you came. Did your mouth fall open with bliss, or would it be clenched shut? Would he be able to see those eyes he loves so much, or would they be in the back of your head?
Your hand clawed at his hair, pulling when it became too much. The balls of your feet dug into his back, all of this is a painful way, yet Farleigh didn’t seem to care. He relished in knowing how good he was making you feel. Knowing only he got to see you like this made him go feral, lapping and sucking at your cunt vigorously.
“Wait—F-Farleigh, I’m— I’m gonna cum!” You moaned out, your head thrown back onto the covers on your bed. He groaned into you, sending a wave of bliss through your core, and that was what made you come so easily undone. Your orgasm crashed into you like an unsuspecting wave, but of pleasure with a hint of pain as he continued torturing you through your orgasm.
“Good girl. Did so good, baby. Y’look so fuckin’ pretty.” He praised, kissing your thigh as you came down from your world-shattering high. Little did you know, that was going to be nothing compared to the way you’re going to feel when he was done with you.
You watched as he stripped himself of his pants and boxers, freeing himself of his confinements. His cock sprang and stood proudly, slapping his stomach. You gulped at the sight of him. Hard, with prominent veins on the sides with a red, angry tip that leaked pre-cum. He was more long than girthy, around 8 inches, the biggest you’d ever seen in person.
It twitched slightly, and his heavy, slightly hairy balls hung, full of cum that you wished to milk out of him till he couldn’t give any more. You craved him, and the need to be stuffed was consuming your darkening thoughts, spreading your legs even wider as a welcoming. An initiative that Farleigh happily took.
He rubbed his length through your folds, teasingly. Each time he did so, his weeping tip bumped against your engorged, sensitive clit. “Sweet girl, you’re so wet f’me.” He pointed out, causing that familiar flush to resume on your hot cheeks. “Please fuck me, Farleigh.” You asked.
Farleigh couldn’t possibly say no to his best girl when you looked up at him like he was a godsend. When you finally looked up at him the way he longed for you to. “Anything you want, baby.” And sure enough, his cock slipped past your lower lips, invading your pussy with such recklessness.
Your walls squeezed him tightly, a warm welcome as you clamped down harder onto him when he fully bottomed out. His balls slapped against the underside of your pussy with each hard thrust he delivered to your cunt, angled just the right way, hitting all the right spots that made your legs shake.
“F-farleigh! Oh-“ you moaned out, gripping the sheets below you with such force, anything to stabilize yourself from the blunt force of his cock dominating your insides.
Farleighs mind was consumed with you. The way you felt around him. The way you looked under him, hair matted to your forehead as desperate cries of pleasure slipped past your lips. He couldn’t help himself, he needed to be closer to you. If he could live in your skin, he would, because even now as you were joined together, it wasn’t enough for him.
His lips attacked yours, taking your breath away as your tongues tangled together. He tasted like his Marlboro cigarettes, mixed with the taste of you. The kiss was passionate, an exchanging of unspoken words the two of you would discuss afterwards.
Your mixed saliva was messy, to say the least. It covered the both of your chins, and a string of saliva connected your tongues still, even as he pulled away. The whole scene was erotic as he kissed down your neck, licking and biting at spots, surely a display of marks for everyone to see and wonder who left them.
But he wasn’t hiding himself, not after this, no. He’ll be at your side forever and always after this. There was no more lonely nights of longing, no more worries and ‘what if’s’, or feeling incomplete, like something was missing, when the whole time he knew that it was you.
A wave of relief danced over your features. You didn’t have to go through this alone now, and as you were on the brink of your second release for the night, the stars seemed to shine brighter through your half opened curtains. He luminescent lighting spanning over Farleighs features, making him look most ethereal above you.
His face was contorted in bliss, a show of how he felt as he forhead rested against yours. Pants slipped past his lips as his hand met the flesh of your breast, squeezing. “Need you. M’gonna cum, baby. Can I cum in you?” He asked breathlessly. You nodded. “Yes, please, Farleigh. Please cum in me.” You moaned against him.
He moaned out, his pace becoming a little more sloppy as his hips chased for a release. You felt your orgasm consume you for a second time tonight, making you tumble over yourself as your body wracked with an overwhelming sense of pleasure. His tip hit your g-spot with every thrust, and the feeling was becoming overwhelmingly good.
Tears lined your eyes, but he kissed them away with sweet nothings as he painted your walls a creamy white color, his hips finally stuttering against yours in a final show of his arousal for the night. His balls grew tight, as he filled with with a groan. Sure enough, your sweet cunt was milking him greedily.
When he finally decided to pull out, he watched the way both of your release mixed together in a beautiful display. He smiled softly down at you, your eyes connecting in a sense of a strange understanding. Both of you, outsiders, who now had each other.
His hand found yours as he planted a charming kiss on your forehead. “Let’s get you cleaned up, yeah?” He hummed out, watching as you nodded, propping yourself upright.
He slid his clothes back swiftly, making his way to the restroom, wetting a cloth with warm water before making his way back to where you sat, waiting on your bed. “Let me see, honey.” He urged, ushering your legs back open, gently dapping the warm cloth on your sensitive cunt, cleaning up the remnants of the mess both of you had made.
“Are you alright?” He asked as he used the clean side of the warm cloth to gently dab your forehead, ridding it of sweat, pushing your hair out of the way. “Yes—I—thank you” you said after a moment of pondering your words.
He raised a brow. “For what?” He asked. You blushed, embarrassed under his peering gaze. Ironic, seeing as he saw and heard so much more from you just mere seconds ago. “For everything, I suppose. I-I’m sorry I didn’t see it sooner.” You muttered, almost ashamed.
He clicked his tongue as he flicked your forehead with his finger. “You silly girl.” Was all he muttered. “Don’t worry about that now. It doesn’t matter anymore. You know now, and that’s what counts.” He smiled, a confirmation that everything indeed, was going to be okay.
His curly hair seemed more vibrant, and the glint in his eyes told you what you longed and awaited to hear the most.
“I love you.”
˚ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ˚
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suzukiblu · 5 months
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Day two NaNoWriMo; obligatory sugar daddy Tim/sugar baby Kon AU.
"Well, you are the plan guy," Kon says, grinning again and pushing his sunglasses up into his hair. "Supreme?" 
"Works for me," Tim says. It's meat and dairy and bread and vegetables and Kon is probably invulnerable to heart disease, so he figures that's basically health food to him, right? Especially if he needs more calories than the average guy. 
Pizza's sure as shit gonna be more satisfying than a protein bar, if nothing else. 
Tim's definitely ordering like, breadsticks or wings or something too. And maybe a two-liter or two. Cinnamon bread. Something. Hell, he'll buy all that and then some if he has to. He's got the money. 
Who the hell decided it was okay to let this happen? Really. Is there literally no responsible adult in Kon's life to intervene in this situation? Dubbilex was made by Cadmus too and has his own issues with managing to have an out-of-lab life, Rex Leech is apparently out of the picture, which might be a blessing anyway, Tana Moon is equally MIA, and Superman has apparently lost his entire damn mind, so . . .
There's literally no responsible adult in Kon's life to intervene in this situation, is there. There's no irresponsible adult in Kon's life to intervene in this situation. As far as Tim knows, every single other one Kon knows is either Cadmus-employed or a supervillain or just completely uninvested in his existence. 
Maybe Tim should be talking to Red Tornado about this. Is this something he should be talking to Red Tornado about?
. . . sure, that'd help. Red Tornado is about five minutes back into being a person and has Traya and Kathy and the whole team to worry about, and absolutely could handle something like this while also trying to figure out his own shit and keep an eye on all the rest of them too. Sure. That'd work. 
This is a problem, Tim thinks. 
This is a definite problem, in fact. 
He has no idea what to do about this problem, though, so he just orders a truly inadvisable amount of pizza and wings and double-iced cinnamon bread for pickup. They've done weirder than get takeout in the Super-Cycle and they'll do weirder again. Besides, it could use the . . . exercise, or whatever that counts as. Not like the Super-Cycle has muscles, but it does get tired sometimes and seem to appreciate getting out and–well, whatever. That's just something to figure out later, probably. 
Tim really should figure that out, though. And also if the Super-Cycle is gonna be down for going supervillain, because yeah, that's obviously a thing to keep in mind. 
He flies it to the pizza joint, and spends the flight casually grilling Kon about his coworkers and employee benefits and the Cadmus security systems. The answers are: a lot of lab-born clones and too many grown-ass adults who have no excuse not to know better, work-related health care and nothing else, and Kon and Guardian, mostly. And also some random weird death traps and a couple of cameras here and there, apparently, but it all sounds incredibly dated to Tim's ears and it really seems like Kon and Guardian are taking on the lion's share of everything more complicated than watching a feed or flipping on an alarm system. Like, it really does. 
So that's not great. 
"Jesus, man, how much did you order?" Kon snorts with a laugh while Tim's paying the girl at the drive-up window in cash. He doesn't really want to explain this particular expense on the Bat credit card. Generally he doesn't want to explain takeout and junk food on there at all, in fact, though obviously he makes a point of going to Batburger with Steph once a month, just to hear Bruce sigh about it later. Appropriate teenage nonsense and all. He gets the kids' meal and the terrifyingly purple Spoiler shake every time. It tastes like acidic cotton candy. Yes, literally. "Like just the whole menu or what?" 
"Of course I did. I've got a Kryptonian to carry it all for me, don't I?" Tim replies with a smirk he doesn't really feel after everything he's learned today. Everything Kon just told him, because he doesn't see what's wrong with any of it. 
It reminds him of the abused kids he meets on the job who insist they're fine, and they don't need Batman and Robin to save them. 
He wonders if Jason was like that, when Bruce first met him. 
He also wonders if he maybe did over-order a little on the pizza, but worst case scenario the leftovers should fit in the fridge. 
. . . maybe, anyway. Probably. 
Mostly? 
Kon immediately cracks into the cinnamon bread on the flight back because he has absolutely no manners whatsoever, and Tim rolls his eyes at him and tries not to visibly brood over the five-alarm fire burning down his brain right now. 
He just . . . doesn't understand how Superman is apparently just fine with this situation. He doesn't even understand how Kon is fine with this situation, but is increasingly certain that the answer to that might just be that Kon doesn't think he has another option. 
He doesn't have another option, as far as Tim can tell. What would he do, crash at the base and just mooch off everyone else for food and gear and whatever else he needs day-to-day? 
Yeah, not exactly a sustainable lifestyle, that. 
Not even a little bit of one. 
Technically, Tim could just pay for whatever Kon needed, between his allowance and his trust fund and without even taking his Bat-stipend into account, but there is no possible way Kon would ever actually go for that. He's way too proud, and even someone with no pride at all would probably find "please let me pay you to quit your horrible job" a hard pill to swallow from a teammate, much less the leader they only barely recognize the authority of.
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sixth-light · 1 year
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(tws ahead: discussion of food, diets and diet culture, eating disorders, calorie counts, and fatphobia in the context of pregnancy)
Truly one of the most bizarre things about being pregnant has been the official advice around food. Food and eating is difficult enough already when you're pregnant - there's excellent scientific evidence that it's advisable to moderate your caffeine intake and avoid alcohol, and an entire laundry list of stuff you're supposed to avoid for food safety/food poisoning risk reasons. (I am a nerd and I read the last scientific review of the linked advice from the NZ Ministry of Health, so I can say with confidence it's also pretty well supported.) Personally, I am largely indifferent to going without alcohol, but after half a year or so my brie cravings are getting pretty intense. That's going to be even tougher for people with food restriction issues. And then there's the potential nutrient deficiencies that come when a baby is sucking up all your available iron, calcium, etcetera.
But on top of all this...a couple of things are also true:
later pregnancy and breastfeeding require a higher calorie intake because you're, uh, feeding an entire baby with your body and those calories have to come from somewhere
healthy pregnancy also requires weight gain because of the aforementioned 'growing an entire person' thing
Western Anglophone society absolutely loses its goddamn mind at the thought of telling women (and other pregnant people, but they are clearly not thinking that far) that it's okay for them to eat more than normal, let alone gain weight
So there's reams and reams of official advice which has like one line saying "maybe don't diet when you're pregnant" quickly followed by "but it's OK! you can diet afterwards! you'll lose lots of weight when you breastfeed!" and then like. eight paragraphs on how while technically, they suppose you need some extra calories during some of your pregnancy, it is DEEPLY IMPORTANT that those calories only come from the most healthy and boring possible foods, because otherwise you might gain too much weight which is the worst possible thing that could happen. Try carrot sticks! Fat-free yoghurt! Dry toast! I have literally seen advice suggesting the extra calories you need can be gained from a "small snack". Maybe an apple. (Most of the estimates I've seen about extra calorie needs in later pregnancy are in the range of 3-400 extra calories a day. That apple would have to be the size of your head.) This is all followed up with dire warnings about gestational diabetes, which is lurking in the wings waiting for any pregnant person who dares use it as justification for eating that extra biscuit. There is clearly a really deep-seated belief at play that if you give them - us - an excuse to eat more we will gorge ourselves on, IDK, chips and ice cream, because the only thing holding us back from obesity is the constant reminder that gaining weight is BAD and that eating too much food is BAD (even though the reality is that weight gain and higher caloric needs are part of a healthy pregnancy). This reality has to be held at arms' length and hemmed in with restrictions and cautions lest all hell break loose. You are very literally advised to calculate your BMI, weigh yourself regularly, and have a target weight gain - i.e. implicitly to restrict your food intake if your weight gain is higher - which I'm sure is just chill and fabulous for people with a history or present of eating disorders.
(The cherry on top of this is that it's normal for pregnant people to have suppressed appetites in late pregnancy despite needing more food because, again, there is an entire baby in there squashing their organs. Add in all those foods that you can't eat, and it can actually be somewhat challenging to eat enough.)
The bit that haunts me is that we know that caloric restriction during pregnancy makes children more likely to have higher weights later on, and you know who is most targeted with this diet-but-don't-diet-but-actually-kinda-do rhetoric? Fat people, who are advised to gain at absolute most about the weight of a healthy full-term baby + amniotic fluid/placenta/etc - and that it's fine if they gain much less weight than that, barely more than the weight of a healthy baby, which would actually equate to total weight loss. During pregnancy. It feels like there could be a lot of self-fulfilling prophecy going on here vis a vis fat parents having fat kids. which is now sometimes characterised as a form of child abuse. FUN.
Anyway, I am sure I'm not the only person to have made these observations (and if you know good writing on this topic I'd love to be linked to it, because I'm way too chicken to try Googling) but man. As I said at the start: the level at which fatphobia and diet culture are institutionalised during pregnancy, to the detriment of actual health, is wild.
(For my money, sane advice would be 'healthy eating advice is the same during pregnancy as it is other times except for the specific foods you should avoid because of increased food poisoning risk, and you need to eat a bit more in later pregnancy. The end.')
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sundrop-writes · 4 days
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Tongue Twister
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Sub!Gar Logan x (Dom)GN!Reader
I wanna get you in a tongue twister - tied up in a tongue twister.
Summary:
You and Gar run into each other in the dark halls of Wayne Manor one night. He finds that he just can't resist your touch.
Or: You quite literally try to suck Gar's soul out through his cock, and he definitely doesn't stop you.
Sub!Gar Logan x (Dom)Gender Neutral Reader. Friends to Friends with Benefits. Smut. Set (vaguely) during Season 3.
Word Count: 2,000
DC Titans Masterlist | AO3 Link
Detailed warnings and author's notes below the cut.
Warnings: This is pretty much just straight smut/pwp (there is basically no plot); I say that it's 'loosely' set in Season 3 because there is a mention of the Titans staying at Wayne Manor and I was inspired by S3 Gar, but there's no plot spoilers for S3 and you don't need to have seen Titans for this to make sense (this is just hot smut about my favourite hot guy); there is slight dom/sub dynamics - Gar is somewhat submissive (he likes being manhandled and put in his place), and the reader is somewhat dominant in that they take control of Gar and take what they want; this is a blowjob fic - so, the reader is giving Gar a (very messy) blowjob; the reader's gender is not mentioned or described in any way; the main pronouns used for the reader are you/yours; slight nipple play (Gar receiving); (in terms of the canon, Gar's experience is very debatable, but I don't imagine this to be virgin!Gar, at the very least, this is inexperienced!Gar); slight crying kink - mentions of Gar crying from overstimulation and the reader enjoying it; mentions of deepthroating - the reader takes Gar's dick all the way down with no issues (unrealistic, but that happens in fics sometimes); slight manhandling (from the reader toward Gar) (but nothing to state that the reader has super impressive strength); the reader swallows Gar's cum; multiple orgasms/overstimulation (Gar receiving); I don't think I would call this dubcon, but maybe under-negotiated kink? because they didn't discuss overstimulation beforehand, but Gar still likes it; passing mention of Gar masturbating while thinking about the reader; slight ball play and slight anal play (again, all Gar receiving) and using spit as lube in the process; I think that's it for this fic? Anyway - enjoy!
A/N: I have said this before, but sometimes a tiktok edit just distinctly inspires the vibes of a fic. And I woke up the other day and searched 'Gar Logan edit' because I needed to see my boy, and then I found this amazing edit - and I got the idea stuck in my head that I needed to do a fic of S3 Gar (which is my favourite Gar) - getting the sloppiest head of all time. Cause that is what a Tongue Twister means to me. I later found the full song to listen to it, and for reference it's called Tongue Twister by Cash Cash, so that is the song that this fic is named after. It is just very straightforward pwp smut, because I love writing that about Gar lmao. I love seeing him whining and pathetic (and overstimulated). So, here you go! I hope you guys have fun with this, even if you're reading this as someone who has never seen Titans before.
...
Gar had no clue how he ended up in this situation. 
It was a fucking amazing situation to be in. But still, the whole thing puzzled him. (Well, it would if he had any brain power to think about it at this current moment.) 
This whole thing started when he had woken up hungry. Which, wasn’t entirely unusual for him. Doctor Caulder said that his transformations and his ‘condition’ in general caused him to burn more calories than the average person - not nearly as much as someone like Rita, but definitely more than he used to before his genes mutated. Even on a vegetarian diet, he craved a lot of junk food, which he ate. And he didn’t seem to gain a lot of weight because of this part of his condition. And he often found himself woken in the middle of the night by a rumbling stomach. 
On his way back from the kitchen with a stomach full of nutella and banana sandwiches, he noticed a gentle glow coming from the library of Wayne Manor. He was much more awake than he had been when he had first stumbled to the kitchen, so he had decided to investigate it. He wondered who else was awake at this hour. 
It was you. Apparently doing some late night reading. 
A lot happened very quickly then. 
You reached out and thumbed a large glob of nutella off the side of his mouth, and told him that he was adorable, and delicious. And you stared him right in the eyes while you licked it off your finger - mentioning that you loved his choice to go without a shirt as you removed the now spit-soaked digit from your mouth, looking him up and down with undeniable heat in your eyes. 
Gar felt so utterly trapped. (In the best way possible.) 
That spit-wet thumb made its way to touching his bare nipple, and when he let out an uncontrollable, absolutely loud whimper - he was done. 
That was how he ended up like this. 
This wild and wicked situation being that he was currently getting the best blowjob of his life. And he never would have expected that he would ever be on the receiving end of something sexual from you (he could have only hoped) - so finding out that you could give the most mind-blowing head - well fuck, it was really something. 
You had pushed him down to sit in the middle of the couch in front of the warm glow of the fireplace and stripped him of his loose sleep pants. This left him completely naked, pinned down by your demanding touch and the suction of your mouth on his hard cock. 
“Oh, fuck. Oh my god!” 
He remembered protesting at some point. Maybe. 
If he did, it was only on the basis that the two of you might get caught. The library was a well trafficked area of the ridiculously large house. It was a quick route to get to the kitchen from the set of bedrooms that the Titans had been staying in, rather than walking through some decommissioned ‘sitting rooms’ with creepy, dusty old furniture in them. Gar could only imagine how embarrassing it would be if someone like Dick or Dawn (someone he looked up to and admired) caught him with his pants down like this. 
Not that he was even capable of embarrassment with how much lust was currently throbbing through him. But it would definitely be embarrassing when he thought about it later. 
“Please, please! More!” 
But - all those thoughts easily leaked out of his ears, and those half-baked protests died off in his throat when he felt just how perfect your mouth was on his cock. The wet, warm suction of your lips around his shaft and the way you bobbed your head into such an easy rhythm, forming hot-white streaks of pleasure all across his cock. It was all too good to try and stop it. 
When the head of his large, thick cock hit the back of your throat - he choked out a whine, seeing stars split out across his vision for a moment. You were exceedingly talented at this. 
It was partially ‘talent’, and partially the fact that you truly did want to consume him. 
Every single little moan he let out, every pathetic, sweet whimper - it only spurred you on, made you want to see more. More of the way his stomach quaked when he tried to hold it in, more of feeling his thigh muscles desperately shake under your hands when you traced your tongue under the head of his cock. More pretty tears flowing from his big brown eyes as he was pushed closer and closer to the edge. More of him staring down at you in awe as you played his body like an instrument you had mastered in minutes. 
“Oh god! Oh! Oh - mmm,” 
Fueled by lustful hunger and an attraction for Gar that you had since the day you had met him, you continued on, fucking his cock with your mouth in an utterly unforgiving way. You sucked down the length of his cock and didn’t seem to care as the round cockhead hit the back of your throat, bruising it - your desperation only growing as your oxygen was cut off by the thickness of his shaft. In fact, you let out a moan of your own as his thick green pubes brushed against your nose and you inhaled his natural scent. 
The vibrations shook his cock and that only contributed to the insane pleasure he was feeling. 
Gar felt like he was slowly losing his mind. 
His hands were gripping the couch cushions wildly, finding it too rude and imposing to simply reach out and grab your hair or reach for the back of your head. Even while you handled him like he was simply a toy for your enjoyment, he couldn’t bring himself to return the favor. 
So he sat like a good boy, letting you pin him down and suck the life out of his cock. 
(Not that he wasn’t enjoying every single second of it.) 
“Oh, fuck me! Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me!” 
Gar began chanting, begging in a needy voice that he barely recognized as his own. 
You easily picked up to a brutal pace - gulping down his cock so quickly that it made a sloppy noise with each quick movement, taking him from root to tip within seconds. This made your head practically blur, easily coating his dick in spit and making his skin shine with your wicked efforts.
You sucked his cock so roughly, it was like you were trying to suck something out of him. As if you were trying to obtain some source of life that would magically be drained from his balls if you tried hard enough. 
(In your mind, it was something similar to that. You were desperate to taste his cum. And his perfect noises were supplying your life in a way, so you definitely wanted more.) 
You slurped viciously against his skin, bobbing your head up and down, creating an odd juxtaposition between the very slight roughness of your tongue and the slick flood of your spit whenever you would bob back down. His cock soon became sensitive and his thighs shook - when his legs flexed up toward your head upon instinct, his muscles tightening from all of the strain, you dug your nails into the quivering skin of his thighs and shoved him back down, holding him in place. 
“Y/N!” 
He wailed your name, crying out much louder than he had intended to. 
When he looked down, he made eye contact with you, you stared back with nothing but fierceness and commanding in your eyes. You owned him and you knew it. Even from a position on your knees, you knew that you were in charge. 
His entire body shook with dizziness under the force - flooded with endorphins at being handled so roughly by you. 
Gar’s orgasm was pulled from him forcefully, brought on like a slap in the face at the realization that he loved being pinned under your touch.
“Please, please, oh, oh!” 
Gar heard that lilting, whiny voice and barely recognized it as his own. He felt the air being punched out of his stomach before he realized that he was cumming into your mouth. He thought that surely you would be satisfied by this - that you would be done because he had cum. So he simply rode it out as you hallowed your cheeks and sucked even harder on his sensitive cock. Even making the head aching and raw as you traced your tongue around it and pumped him into your mouth while his stomach shook and he practically gargled his own spit. 
But in that fraction of a moment that he thought you might be done - no. You simply continued on. 
With his cum still lingering on your tongue, you dove back down, not giving him a moment to get soft under your touch. You swallowed his length once again, and he let out a wounded cry as his dick hit the back of your throat once again. His thighs flexed and shook and you left large claw marks in him, fighting him, trying to hold him still. 
He felt hot tears streaking down his face and he knew that this was the most perfect kind of torture - the most beautiful purgatory - being here with your perfect, hot mouth around his cock, seemingly attempting to devour him while he had to sit there and take it. 
“Oh god.” 
He let out another cry and all you did was reach over and begin to stroke his balls. The skin there was already slick with spit that had dripped down from your mouth, and the touch spewed fire up through his gut and caused him to wail out crooked breaths as his vision blurred with more tears. You were so perfect between his thighs - like you knew every single thing to do in order to drive him closer to the edge of insanity. 
Whenever he had imagined you before, he imagined you soft - he had thought of making love to you when he snuck a private moment with his hand around his cock. He always imagined candles and romantic music and gentle kisses all over your body. But he never could have imagined you like this. So fucking filthy. But now, he couldn’t imagine you any other way. 
You moved your fingers down from his balls, reaching your spit-soaked fingertips down to kiss against his against his hole - and just the slight threat of those fingertips pressing into him, touching such a sensitive spot, had another orgasm barreling through him like he had been struck by lighting. 
You sucked the cum out of him like you were greedy for it, like it would restore the very life to you - this time, Gar was sure that not a single streak of it even got to touch your tongue. When he felt the harsh pin-pricks of overstimulation coating his cock, he desperately gulped for breath, searching for words. 
“Please, please!” He cried out. “I can’t - ngh - no more!” 
You moved your hands to gently rub across his thighs, and you finally pulled back so that his cock fell from your mouth with a wet pop - falling to sit on his stomach, so spit-slick and red, glistening in the low lighting, entirely sloppy and messy. 
He was the most lovely mess above you. Tear streaks coming from his eyes, wet and messy eyelashes almost obscuring his perfect doe gaze down toward you. His face was entirely flushed, all the way down to his chest, making his skin the prettiest shade of pink - matching his parted, panting lips. His thighs were covered in bright red claw marks from your nails, and you couldn’t be prouder than knowing that he would be wearing those the next day - a reminder of you under his clothes, a little something stinging against the fabric to really drive home what had happened here. 
He was so perfect like this. 
You knew for certain that this wouldn’t be the last time you had him like this. (You would crave him too badly after this.) 
“You’re cute.” You remarked, giving him a smirk with your raw lips. 
Gar would be lying if he said that the slightly condescending comment didn’t make his entirely tired dick jump with interest.
...
A/N: Please keep in mind, this is a standalone oneshot, so I will not be writing a sequel or a 'part 2' of it. However, if you liked this fic, definitely check out Stop? (Baby, Don't Stop) - Gar Logan x Fem!Reader or Not A Good Time - Gar Logan x GN!Reader which are similar fics to this one! Or you can check out the entirety of my Titans Masterlist for more fics written by me. And remember, reblogging and commenting is always helpful to support fanfic writers <3
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growandrecover · 4 months
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hi,
im really scared bc im officially ✨overweight✨ and my ed has just been #triggered. any tips on how to avoid relapse?
Hey, anon.
I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. I'm really proud of you for reaching out and actively trying to avoid relapse. That's wonderful.
First up, if you can, stop weighing yourself, measuring, body checking, or anything else you may be doing. Your weight does not say anything about you. Absolutely nothing. If you're concerned about your BMI specifically (which I know a lot of people with eds get caught up in), it's all a bunch of garbage. It was made based off of cis white men, and does not take muscle mass into consideration. Even if you happen to be a white amab person, it's still a joke. If you can't stop completely, try to limit what you're doing.
Next, please make sure you're eating all your meals and snacks. My therapist has told me to do this, and I'm passing along the information to you guys. If you have to, set a schedule for yourself and stick to it with the best of your ability.
If you're someone who used exercise to lose weight in the past/if you exercise currently, you may want to lay off that until you're in a better headspace. Going along with this, if you wear a Fitbit or Apple Watch of any kind, taking it off may help avoiding triggers like your daily step count, calories burned, and your other exercise levels. I wore one for almost a year and took it off a few months ago. Surprisingly enough, my quick dips back into some of my ed behaviors have stopped. I finally realized that those triggers sitting on my wrist 24/7 had been messing with my head.
If you're able to/not already, get an adequate amount of sleep. I think we all know what happens when we stay up too late, letting our minds wander into our ed thoughts in the middle of the night. Low levels of sleep interfere with our mental health, which, in times like these, needs to be extra nurtured.
Try to look at it from someone else's point of view. If someone you knew came to you with this exact problem, what would you say? Would you want them to be kind to their body, to fuel it, and to take care of it? Probably, right? Or if that's hard for you to say to yourself, wouldn't you just want them to be free of their eating disorder?
This is pretty harsh, but your ed is trying to hurt you. It's trying to kill you. Whatever it needs to say to get you to engage in those behaviors, it will. It'll tell you that you're not as [adjective of your choice] or [another adjective of your choice] when you weigh more than you have in the past, but that's simply not true. As I said earlier, your weight is just a number. You deserve recovery. You deserve happiness. You deserve a life free of food rules and that nasty voice in your head.
If you're scared, I'm here to tell you: your ed will not fix anything. Losing weight will not fix the idea of yourself you have in your head, and won't make you magically like your body more. It wants you to think it will, but it won't. It only makes your life worse.
Something that helps me is looking at recovery posts on Pinterest or Tumblr. I love being able to see other people's thoughts and encouragement. It always inspires me to keep going, and I hope it'll do the same for you, too.
Whatever it is that triggered you is not worth all the pain and suffering that comes with an ed. I don't care if it was something somebody said or just a thought you had. Nothing is worth going back to your ed.
You can do this. I believe in you.
I really hope this was at least a little bit helpful, and I hope you're okay, anon. If you're not right now, you will be.
If I missed something, or you need someone to talk to, feel free to send me a message! ♡
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turtlesandfrogs · 1 year
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So, earlier this week, our water was off for about two and a half days, and we decided that during that time it would make sense to buy prepared meals, since water was limited and cooking from scratch and cleaning up use a lot of water.
To give some context, this is not a thing I have done- I grew up eating meals made from scratch*, and just kept doing it because people generally do what they know. So living off of prepared foods for two days was an entirely new experience for me.
The thing we noticed, and I'm still not over, is how the portions are so *small* and not very filling, and we ended up eating way more often. I was incredulous that this was what passed for a meal, so I looked at the calories, and then went to a calorie calculator because I don't count calories so I didn't know what would be reasonable. The meals usually had around 300 to 400 calories, but for a person of my height, age, etc, the calculator said I should eat around 1600 cal, if I got little to no exercise. And I'm below average height for a woman!
If people are expected to eat three meals a day, the meals added up to around 900 to 1200 calories a day- which is way less than the 1600 I'd need if I weren't exercising! This is just absurd! What about people who are on their feet all day? What about people who are taller than me? (Not a high bar) What about people who are growing?
It just, it explains so much about how much Americans struggle with food & health if this is what the expectation is of a meal. Of course people are getting their calories through snacks and coffee drinks! The meals simultaneously do not have enough calories, so do not satiate, and don't have enough vegetables!
It also explains why eating out is such a thing- you at least are getting decent portion sizes at restaurants! Way better calorie to dollar ratio!
And just like I kept eating the way my family ate (with some adjustments, lol**) as a kid, I wonder how many people eat so much prepared food because that's what they grew up eating and they didn't get how to make your own food modeled.
And I wonder how many people don't approach learning to cook because people who make recipes are usually showing you the meals they are proud of, not their day-to-day, basic survival meals?
Which is a really long way to say I'll now occasionally be posting recipes of my day-to-day meals.
* literally, I grew up in one of those families that had a grain mill, a garden, and raised our own animals. Everything was from scratch, from the waffles at breakfast to the spaghetti with dandelion greens for dinner. Every day. Boxed cereal was an occasional splurge.
**I still make almost everything from scratch, but I went from butchering animals to being a vegan. Which makes the misinformation from both sides especially grating, let me tell you.
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that-girl-lyra · 2 months
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My Fitness Favourites (2024 Master Post)
This is sort of like my own master post and or an update upon my previous one on Reddit, but please remember that like all things, not everything will work for everyone. I am not a doctor or certified PT (yet!). I'm just a girl who wanted to lose weight and found a passion for all things gym and fitness related :)  With that being said, I hope that you guys find the tools that I used helpful to you, and I can not wait to see your progress <3 
Apps 
Here are some of the apps that I used and still use to this day to help track my fitness progress. I’ve gone through a bunch of different fitness apps and these are by far my favorites. 
FitNotes 
This app is super straightforward. I use it each time I go to the gym or do a home workout to track the number of sets, reps, and weights. There are no ads and it's completely free. You can also add in your own workouts and machines if you can't find what you’re doing in their list. 10 out of 10, highly recommend!
FitBod 
I no longer use this app HOWEVER, if you’re just starting out I think this app would be a good place to get started. It lays out a workout plan for you based on what your goals are, and it even shows you HOW to do each workout if you’re unsure of the movements and form. I found it super helpful when I started out and I hope you do too! I will say, the free version does give you a lot, however it does have a paid plan to which I am unfamiliar. 
Tabata Timer 
Personally, nowadays I only use this app occasionally but if you’re not a fan of counting reps, this may be a better alternative. You can create workouts and customized times for sets, breaks, rests, etc. I like to use this for my kettlebells and mace work at home, but you can use it however you wish! Bonus points because it's also 100% free. We love free shit here lol. 
MyNetDiary 
Similar to MyFitnessPal, this is an app that tracks your calorie input and output. I prefer it’s interface over MyFitnessPal personally, and this is the app I used to lose 40+lbs in 2022. Along with a food scale, this is a very useful tool, and I still use it when I go into a cut. The free plan is great and it doesn't force you into a paid one. You have the option to upgrade, but its not necessary unless you really really really wanna see all of your macros besides calories, sodium, protein and carbs. 
Alarmy 
Sleep is probably one of the most important things for your overall mental and physical health. I used to suck at waking up early but I really really wanted to become an early bird and track my sleep. I found Alarmy and I haven’t looked back. In the free version, you can be awoken with annoying sounds and tasks to turn off your alarm, as well as track your sleep and sleep quality.  
Websites 
TDEE Calculator 
As I said in my previous master post, a good place to start is to find out what your TDEE is (total daily energy expenditure). Basically, how many calories you burn just by being alive. You can go from there to find out how many calories you should eat depending on if you're trying to lose/gain weight, as well as protein intake on top of your desired fitness level. A very handy tool. Just plug in your current height, weight, age, and fitness level and you’ll be good to go! 
Equipment / Tools 
Xiaomi MiFit Band  
Ima be honest, I really hated the samsung fitness watches. I went through 2 of them due to battery issues and I never even physically damaged them. I got the Xiaomi MiFit band because I was sick of paying so much money on fitness watches and this thing has the durability of a Nintendo 64 I swear. I only charge the sucker like, maybe once a week, and it gives a pretty accurate read of how many calories I burn during walking, workouts, etc. Also, the thing was like $40 or something. Ive had it over a year and the only thing I’ve had to replace was the strap (a pack of two was like $6). The strap was also my fault for breaking it lol. 
Renpho Scale 
Sort of a tool/app combo. The scale is around $20 on amazon and it tracks your weight (duh) as well as body composition to a fairly accurate degree. The gym I currently go to has a body composition machine and I’ve done a DexaScan in the past and the information between all of them is a close match. The app is free as well and I love it. 
Adjustable Dumbbells 
I love the gym, I do, but my heart will always belong to dumbbells. There is so much you can do with them from arms, legs, core, back,etc. They’re a great piece of kit and I will never stop using them. A set of adjustable dumbbells will put you back a few bucks sure, but imo, it's a worthy investment in the long run. Plus if you’re like me and you have limited space in your home, they’re a great choice. 
Supplements 
I wanna reiterate the fact that I am NOT a doctor lol but I'm sure everyone has seen a metric ton of influencers and PT’s recommending this or that supplement. Truly, I don’t take many and the only one I can recommend personally is Creatine. Just remember to drink water with it and you’re golden. Some people get a mildly upset stomach on it but again, that all depends on the person. I’ve personally never gotten an upset stomach with it and I take/have taken 2 types of Creatine (Monohydrate and Alkaline). 
You’ll hear about a “loading phase” but you don’t have to do that if you don't want to. It's not necessary. 
The only other thing I take is magnesium but that's just to help me not have hypnic jerks when I go to sleep. Literally no other reason lol.   
General Advice/Tips 
If you’re just starting out with your own fitness journey and begin to tell people that you’re working out, eating right, etc, you may experience some negativity from others. Once you say anything like “Im working out/losing weight!” everyone and their mother becomes a health expert. I’ve gotten people telling me to not lift weights because “Its bad for your bones!”, or “Your heart will explode eventually!”. 
These are people who are just jealous and they envy your dedication to yourself. Ignore them. Misery often demands company. 
You may also find lovely little messages in your dm’s from that one girl in high school who was a bully and is now shilling MLM products. Please for the love of all that is good and green on this earth, do not interact! They will send you really crappy copy and paste messages saying that they can help you on your journey with “insert snake oil product here”. 
There is no magic pill, drink, juice, cleanse, detox, whatever the hell that will do the work for you. Pyramid Schemes that are the most common for this are ItWorks, JuicePlus, Herbalife, and BeachBody. Idk if Plexus is still around but still. If you’re ever unsure about anything, I would pay a visit to r/antiMLM for more info. 
Diets, diets, diets are all the rage (as they are always). Guru’s telling their followers to eat only animal based because “its how our ancestors ate!” or “do x to lower your cortisol levels”, and “STAY AWAY FROM BREAD AND SEED OILS!”. Block, ignore, and unfollow. 
I don’t know about you, but I absolutely fucking love bread and cheese and will turn any Olive Garden within a 20 mile radius of me into my bitch with unlimited breadsticks and pasta. 
Yes, we all know certain food is healthier than others, but at the end of the day as long as you are watching what you eat, and getting your workouts in, it doesn't matter. If you want a burger then eat the burger. 
In Conclusion 
I could go on and on forever about anything and everything fitness related. Book recommendations, creators to follow/unfollow, routines…I love it all, I truly do. And one day I hope to become a certified PT myself, but until that day comes, I simply am not. I'm just a girl who got fit, and want to see others achieve their goals as well. I know how hard and awful the process can be, but I guarantee you that every step you take up that mountain is worth every second of the view at the top. 
Movement is improvement, and as long as you keep moving, you’ll keep improving. 
If you’re here reading this, then you’ve already taken step 1 and I couldn't be more proud of you. Its a hard thing to look in the mirror and say to yourself “I need to change ''. Self confrontation is often very difficult and disheartening. But where many have chosen to give up, you chose to step up. And I am so fucking thrilled that you did <3 
If anyone has anything else they’d like to share in the comments about tools and what not that you’ve used, please feel free to post them! This is a safe space for all of us. 
Thank you all for reading and I hope you find what I’ve written to be useful in your fitness journey. Keep up the good work.  
Lyra
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gerinurse · 1 year
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Week 2….
Im a bit late this week with a post but that’s life lately 🤷🏼‍♀️. A little uptick in the weight of 2lbs this week. I’m not concerned as we had takeout twice and one of those days the food was quite salty. Add in the fact that my blood pressure med prescription which is a diuretic got screwed up and 2lbs up isn’t bad.
I’ve tracked every single meal every single day which is a big thing for me and I’ve only once been over my calories in 2 weeks. I’ve been stretching a bit and trying to get the joints and muscles used to moving again.
My anxiety is still riding high. I think part of it is due to work being a nightmare. When you are the type of person who doesn’t have great self esteem and had pride in the fact that people felt you were amazing at your job and suddenly you’re being told that you’re incompetent at every turn, it plays havoc on your mental health. Frankly it’s exhausting and I am counting my working days until I can retire next august. I’d rather flip burgers than continue to work for this health region as a nurse and what’s even more sad is that I am one of many saying the same thing. I used to love my job and loved being a nurse. Now I dread every single work day 😢.
Anyway all I can do is keep doing my best for my job, the people I care for and for myself. Hope everyone is having a great week ❤️.
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chaoticacademicdemon · 11 months
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Series Agogé, personal proyect
Chapter 1.2: “Aike”
On my way to the Agogé
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I can assume that it is one to measure our intellectual capacity, another for Evepyoc and the one we just did for physical fitness. Although it doesn't make much sense for it to be like that, since releasing a record doesn't measure almost nothing, I suppose the director will have something in mind, after all she's obsessed with making it fair for everyone.
We go to where the group was attacked by my record that is leaving when we arrived. Here the ground is no longer grass, but well-kept stones with very beautiful shapes. And then I look at my next big enemy, an Evepyoc meter. I knew there must be one here but I didn't want to believe it, now I know I'm definitely lost. Focused on my own disaster, I feel the small current of air that forms a gray owl flying over our group. Obviously they had to spy somehow.
The guy next to me accidentally nudges me, apologizes, and starts biting his nails. His English level was not the best judging from his response. This blond boy is going to end up making me even more nervous if he continues like this. I look at him to get his attention and when he turns around I give him the mythical thumbs up to encourage him. He looks like he's calmed down a bit, better.
The instructor calls me up front and I do what I've already done thousands of times. Although I first ask what the limit is, to which he answers 700 E. Please get me out of here now, now I'm going to break a measuring instrument, how can my day get so bad? But like a Band-Aid, I'll rip it off quick.I place my hand on the orb and it begins to levitate, heat up, change color multiple times until it reaches the height of my shoulders and glows with a blinding white light. After less than 5 seconds, to my luck, it breaks up into thousands of little crystals, still with small unsynchronized waves of that white light.
And with that I'm off, that's it, I run to my spot at the end of my group. We are like 24 people more or less, they are not exactly few but it does not give me as much anxiety as before. The second round of disbelief doesn't affect me as much anymore, so I just stare at the ground until we're led to the next test. I got a 100 as expected and the blond boy a 78, he didn't have much to worry about, although it's normal to get nervous.
In this test we enter a room, surely the main classroom. There's another group doing the test so we sit on the opposite wall. Evelynn sits on my right side, while on my left is a guy who gave me a bad feeling. The tables are high, comfortable and the seats lightly padded, it must be great to teach here. The blackboard is huge too, and our monitor looks like chalk with the difference in size and its white uniform. While the exams are being delivered to us, I realize that the other monitor is not there.
I thank you for the exam and the pens that you are distributing and I write my name in the corresponding section. I see "name" and I write it in full, without realizing that it says "surname" below, a good way to start the exam, and without a tipex on top.Then out of the corner of my eye I watch our monitor walk away and walk out the door. I have no idea what they want us to do, although I can assume they will see that people are honest and don't copy each other.
The exam was relatively simple, a question with several sections of arithmetic, a commentary on a guided historical text, counting the main ideas of a given poetry and to which style it belongs and an exercise made up of 3 questions on general knowledge, I call them that way because they do not I know very well in what matter to classify them. The questions were "Which macronutrient consumes the greatest number of calories when digested?", "In what year did Christopher Columbus discover America?" and “Who is the God of Greek agriculture?”. I answered all the exercises, even the last trick question. The Goddess of agriculture is Demeter, but she has been named masculine to confuse.
Looking at my exam, I realize that if I really do everything right on the exam, I will have a perfect score on the tests. I review the exam and look specifically at one question, the date of the discovery of America. I change it to the year 1492, I'm pretty sure it's in the year 1469 although I'm terrible at dates. The one on my left looks at my test and, confused, he hands me his test that he says 1942 on. Dude, I think you've got the date off by a few hundred years.
I look at the date, look at my exam again, and leave it as it is. I give him a thumbs up but when he points to my exam and his for me to copy I turn my head telling him no. In an hour and a half we finished the exam. The monitor from the other group comes in to get them out and tells us that we still have 20 minutes left. Bored, I put my head in my hands and start to close my eyes when Evelynn lightly touches my shoulder with hers with a wide smile. If what she's trying to do is cheer me up, she's more than succeeded. We play tic tac toe at the table and wait until our monitor comes back and takes us to the square again.
I just realized what an idiot I've been, if they leave us in a room this big without supervision, it was certain that they were watching us on a camera. It didn't even occur to me to look at the ceiling to know where they were. I hope we don't get penalized for scratching the tables or playing on the exam.
Then the results pop up on my phone that had been blocked all this time, and my legs feel weak. 600/300. Impossible.
I click on the "elaborate in the results" tab and see all the perfect tests and next to it a 100 bonus on each one for completing the "secret task". You must be kidding me. Then the director sends the classification list and I appear first. I'm ahead of a guy with an exact 300 points, well now that I look at it it's three people with perfect scores. They're going to think I'm a genius or something. I am class α, and I have the 600 points that I just earned.My heart is going to break from how fast it beats. And then people start talking and I hear my name being called over and over again accompanied by my nickname, “the contractor”. I don't want to be here, I don't want this attention.
On top of that, my sister, whom I don't even know, she's here too. Nice family reunion. Oh no, I look at the list again and she is the third person with 300 points. Why does this happen to me? Running, I follow the instructions of the monitors that indicate that we take our luggage and go to the area of ​​residences. My sister is going to be in my class, my mother's second daughter, the one who made her leave my father with me and run away with his lover. Anyway, my family history is very convoluted. This day was going to come whether he wanted it or not. Now what matters is finding a good room with a common kitchen and gym and calming down with hot tea and a good movie.
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(Ty so much for reading. Any suggestions or corrections are wellcome, english is my second language)
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Hey I thought I could ask for some advice on this as I do not know what would be a healthy boundary in regards to this. I've lately been struggling with a relapse first because of depression then because of illness. It's been hard as only one friend really knows or cares about it. I greatly appreciate her for this. But I have been running into an issue with an unaware friendgroup. We have this discord server and it normally is fine. Nothing too heavy and mostly just art and video games. We do have a vent channel and this person is slowly starting to post more about their weight and calorie counting and bmi. I am highly competitive which is an issue I need to resolve myself. On the other hand I feel that this is a safe place and I'm allowed to be able to say I'd really appreciate no weight loss discussion there as I've also felt that I should not brinf my issues up there. Would it be an okay thing to do to maybe ask this person to not discuss weight loss?
I always struggle to see the line between my competitiveness and my actual triggers. I'm currently unable to go home much because my brother has developed an exercise addiction and my family says my concerns are out of line. They also have said his behaviour is normal and past situations have made me feel that discussing things that trigger me can lead to people getting aggressive and annoyed. This is why i feel really scared to adress this in my friendgroup.
I'm so sorry for the long ask. I really appreciate your posts, they help me remind myself that I should keep going despite all the hardships I'm facing <3
Wow, that can be really difficult to navigate! I would say you are ABSOLUTELY allowed to confide your issues to your friends, and that if they are good friends they will understand and respect your need for healing. Do be prepared to encounter an issue that many of us in ED recovery encounter, where we have to make hard choices when some of our friends are not so good at being supportive.
I think, depending on what you feel comfortable sharing with people in the vent channel, you would be well within your rights to share maybe just a small amount of your backstory to give context as to why this is triggering for you - stuff like "I have had to work hard to recover from an eating disorder, and I still have some triggers." However, if you don't feel comfortable sharing that, you could simply go with the lines "It is not good for my mental health to be part of conversations about weight, BMI, or dieting. I hope you understand and understand that although I do care, these things are not good for my health."
Do understand that while you are well within your rights to at least put this out there, your friend may say no. You're allowed to voice your issues, but your friend has been using this as a space to vent their own issues. Hopefully the conversation is at least had respectfully and everyone is able to stick to a solution that works for everybody. If not, you can respectfully tell the group something like, "I understand. For my safety and mental health my only option is to stay out of this chat for an indeterminate period of time." These are hard choices to make and can hurt, but setting this boundary may free you up to find people who do support your mental health needs.
As for your family, it's harder for me to give you advice simply because I don't know the degree to which your brother is exercising. I think that gym bros can absolutely take it to an unhealthy extreme and get absorbed in damaging fad diets and stuff like that, but since I don't know what your brother is doing, I cannot verify that that's the case. Whether or not his exercise is unhealthy, I can offer you this recovery advice: you can only control your own recovery journey in the end. You do someone else's recovery, especially if they are not looking to change anything. So perhaps you could ask your brother and family members not to discuss his gym stuff/diets with you? Frame it as a way to protect yourself, because it is causing you so much concern and stress.
If you find yourself getting triggered to the point of being aggressive, it is always okay to ask for a break in the conversation. Taking a step back can help you regulate and find a coping strategy to get into a calmer frame of mind, where it will be easier to think of a next move. "Can I get back to you in a bit? I need to think about that a little more," is an okay thing to say.
No need to apologize for the long ask, I hope you are able to heal and make these things a part of your learning/growth journey!
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troidatoi · 7 months
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Day 1 - 8/23/2023
Hi Tumblr!
I had one of you in high school but deleted it after college. I decided to make another just so I have a place to rant and vent about things that make me sad or angry or just things in general. I do journal but I'd like to use it for more positive things and manifestations or whatever. I turned on all the privacy settings so hopefully no one finds this. lmfao. I know all posts are public but I don't really know anyone in my life that has Tumblr anymore. I kind of just needed a place to fucking vent or rant. Today's Kobe's birthday so I'm trying not to be so angry today. (lol, sorry Kobe.) Okay so here goes. I just needed a way to let out my frustrations and so I was like why not Tumblr? I'd mainly be talking about my health and probably my frustrations with life in general.
Growing up, I've always been a big ass kid and you can tell and it showed in my pictures. Been bullied a lot for it from everybody including family. Had a kid threw a rock at me when I was little and said he hated fat people. My parents took me to a weight loss doctor where I cried my eyes out. I guess I always sought food out for comfort. I'm also an only child. I've always wanted to try and better my health but didn't know how, didn't really have the resources or money, and I was constantly surrounded by food. I kind of wish my parents had let me figure out how to do it on my own. I turned into this person with low self esteem, low confidence, hating what I looked like everyday, hanging out with my skinny friends back then was torture for me because I was constantly comparing myself to them (I know they loved me, wished I loved myself as much as they loved me). I hated that I fixated on the way I looked but hey that's what society has programmed us to do. It's easy to be like love yourself blah blah when you're not in the position of constant self hatred. I've tried calorie counting, diets, seeing a nutritionist (which helped a little only to later realized that it wasn't sustainable for me and I developed an eating disorder.) Although I'm pretty sure I've had an eating disorder ever since I was little and now I feel like shit every time I eat food or get scared to eat. I think the only person who I really saw results with and was sustainable was my personal trainer. (Shoutout Michael!) Hopefully, I can come back once I find a job again. (Can someone please fawking hire me already?)
So yeah going on a tangent, apologies! I started running when lockdown hit and I loved it but I also developed hammer toes and it hurt so much to walk and wear shoes. I went to a podiatrist and they were like get orthopedics and I was like okay but they were so expensive even with health insurance and I'm like okay well fuck this so I got surgery and I was so fucking miserable. lmao. I couldn't do anything and didn't leave my bad. It hurt so much to eat that I lost so much weight and I got so sad like crying for days. I realized I needed help if I didn't want k*ll myself so I called the hotline at midnight and it was nice actually. I've heard bad stories but thankfully the person I talked to listened to what I had to say and he brought up the Dodgers. lmao. And he was like maybe I'll see you at a Dodgers' game. I hit up a therapist the next day, a week later hit up a psychiatrist and was prescribed sertraline. (An antidepressant). The weight loss was crazy because I've never been that thin and I wasn't sure how to feel because it was deadass depression weight loss. I was happy with the weight loss but sad about how I lost it. I had so much loose skin that I also decided to do a tummy tuck, skin removal and thigh lift surgery and the recovery was such a pain in the ass but I felt so good and clothes actually fit. I should have probably waited till the next year because I took so much antibiotics that I found out I have leaky gut so I have to stay away from gluten, diary and processed sugar for the time being. (Hopefully cause my gawd I miss eating bread.) I have so much bloating, inflammation, joint pain, brain fog, acne breakouts, tingling sensations, pain on my sides and the list can go on. I went to my primary care doctors and a neurologist and they didn't really help much. Finally went to a holistic doctor and she figured out what was wrong with me and I know it's going to take awhile for everything to heal but I just want to stop feeling like this. (I also had surgery in 2013 to get an ovarian cyst removed and I didn't know I had it because everyone called me fat and they told me the cyst was making me bloated as shit.) I'm trying not to be resentful and look at the past but it's hard because there's so much trauma. Felt like my family didn't love me if I wasn't skinny.
My therapist said I should stop blaming myself but I can't help it. I know things are going to get better and I'm doing my part and putting in my best effort to heal and follow the treatment plan. I know I'm being impatient but for once in my life, I just want to be healthy again and enjoy food without being scared to eat it. Luckily, a healed gut is attainable so I need to keep fighting for it. I know it's going to be worth it in the end. I'm also paying so fucking much for this holistic doctor like I better have the strongest gut in the world and lose 100 pounds so that when I turn to the side no one can see me.
I am also in a lot of credit card debt and I know I'll pay it off once someone hires me but the job market is so fucking hard right now. Probably need to sell feet pics or find a sugar daddy to afford my lifestyle. (lmao jk, kind of) The way I applied to so many jobs the past week and a half is crazy. Just have to trust the Universe and believe and manifest.
Right now, I just really want to focus on healing my gut so I can eat yummy things again, getting a new full time job with higher pay and being surrounded by my loved ones. One of those things where I so badly want things to get better and it feels like no matter how hard I try, things seem to be moving slow. But they're moving, I guess? lmao.
I just want the best for me and it's going to happen because I deserve it and I said so and what I say goes. I hope you try your best to love yourself through this process and to know that things are going to be so amazing for you that you're going to wonder why you felt like this. The setback is stronger than the comeback. Remember that.
And one more time, Happy Birthday, Kobe. I miss and love you 24/8. <3
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tnlbarth-blog · 8 months
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Aug 14 2023 - 5:02pm
Trigger Warning: Talk of Weight Loss, Talk of Eating Disorders, Talk of Medication
Warning: All people places and things resembling any real people places or things are merely coincidence and are not to be taken as such.
Disclaimer 1: Do not do any of the things discussed in this post.
Disclaimer 2: I am not a doctor, seek the advice of a nutritionist to properly lose weight
Disclaimer 3: Do not stigmatize eating disorders or any other mental health disorders. The people affected by these disorders do not need to be looked down upon they need understanding and care.
Disclaimer 4: Fatphobia is prevalent in our culture including and not limited to doctors and positions but being fat is not a moral failing.
You know you don't have to be unhealthy to be fat. You can just be fat. It's an interesting concept I know. But fatness was around a lot longer than people would like to think. There have been fat people throughout time.
And you ask,"Why aren't there more pictures of fat people through the ages? Especially when it comes to more recent times after cameras were invented?"
It's not a bad question to ask. If fact I and many other people have asked that question for a while. And you know what was found? These people were photographed but people who knew these photos existed knew they would affect their bottomline if they did not get rid of the small amount that did exist. And in America at one time it was illegal to have a deformity in public and since being fat was seen as such fat people did not leave their homes. So they did not get photographed.
But like I was saying fit people are also fat. You can be healthy and have a large amount of fat on you and the inverse is true. You can be super unhealthy and have a thin body. In fact those in bodies that have visible abdominals and sleek physics tend to feel miserable while they try to maintain that look.
And before people say it "not all bodies like that do"
Yes I realize, but I have seen plenty of people who had had that type of boy talk about how miserable they were getting and maintaining that body.
People who get to a super fit body tend to do so in a very unhealthy way. Counting calories and using exercise to create a very dangerous balancing act.
I have watched people go through dangerous practices to be as thin as possible. I am talking about being literal skin and bone. Some starve themselves some binge and vomit. These are the most common eating disorders. I have watched stories of these victims of diet culture die because they think that all they have to do is continue to restrict their food intake a little more.
But fat people can have these disorders too, I being one of them. Losing half my body weight in such a small amount of time was not because I did it correctly.
I over-exercised for a long time. And by overexercise I mean for hours a day I would do pushups, quarts, jumping jacks, curls and situps. I would dance and go for walks. And I did this everyday. And you sit here and congratulate me for it. That is unhealthy.
I continued this until I wasn't able to lose weight anymore with just exercise and went to a nutritionist. The nutritionist was very healthy informing me how to eat properly. But instead of doing what she said. I took it to an extreme. I didn't know how much I should have been eating for my size and the amount of exercise I was doing. I just decided to only eat one serving of everything I got. I divided food into bags and containers and I cut up food and even looked online to find out single servings of fruits and vegetables. Which on the surface doesn't sound so bad. And it worked for a while. But the problem is, that kind of lifestyle is hard to maintain. Especially since I was way under eating for a person of my size even if I was trying to lose weight.
After all of that I again started to get to a point where I couldn't lose weight again. I hit a plateau. I wasn't at my goal weight and I was very upset. I gave up for a while and gained back a little bit of weight. But then I got the opportunity to get weight loss surgery.
And I jumped at it. I went to their nutritionist and learned even worse weight loss habits including counting calories, and eating only a cup of food and getting all my protein for protein shakes. And because I had to continually lose weight for 6ish months before the surgery I stopped exercising all together. I ended up losing a bunch of weight pre-op trying to lose the allotted amount of weight necessary to get the surgery. During that time I did not move a whole lot and I lost a lot of muscle mass, later on causing some severe injuries that I am still healing from. I did so a lot of scrolling on social media and I learned something about being fat and body positivity. I also learned about intuitive eating.
I never ended up getting the surgery. And I am grateful. I now eat intuitively and I don't exercise to lose weight. Instead I exercise to have fun and be healthy. I know I may never get down to that goal size I had in my mind and I am okay with that.
Now I eat until I am full and only when I am hungry and have an appetite. I exercise only when I want and how I want and I have fun with it. I enjoy myself. I dance and swim and hike and go for walks. I don't do situps anymore. I don't do pushups or planks or any of that stuff. I have gotten back to feeling good in my skin. Have I gained back all that weight? At first I did. But now I have no idea. I don't own a scale anymore. I was obsessive about weighing myself. I used to weigh myself multiple times a day. It was a hard habit to kick.
I am much healthier than I once was. And I am much happier too. The stress of losing weight was causing heart issues to spring up.
Oh and I forgot to tell you I was on medications through it all that caused me to have messed up hunger ques and caused weight gain outside of that. So I was also battling that. I got off of those medications last year sometime.
Through that weight loss journey I ended up losing half my initial body weight. And even though at the time I was happy about that I now look back at that and feel a little sad. I really thought back then that my worth was attached to my weight. I now know that it's not true and even though I am still a big person I am happy and proud in my skin.
Regards
TNL Barth
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stonewallsposts · 1 year
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16 personalities questions: 13-15
13. You are more inclined to follow your head than your heart 
I already discussed this somewhat in the section on sentimental. 
I'm assuming 'follow your head' means 'rationally think about what should be done'. "Follow your heart' means 'go with whatever you happen to feel in the moment'.  
I want to say, of course I try to follow my head. But we humans are really good at justifying irrational actions. Which of course pays a compliment to the rational side by trying to make the irrational decisions sound rational. 
There are areas in my life where I know rationally I want to do one thing, but I don't end up doing that. One of the stupid areas is on my diet. I know that if I'm consistent with counting calories and staying under my maintenance allotment, I will lose weight. I want to lose weight. I'm sick and tired of my stomach being this big. I used to have a flat stomach with an awesome six pack. I used to be muscular. I look like a lump in comparison now. I can lose that weight if I just stick with it. I'd look better, I'd feel better, I'd fit in better clothes. There's no good reason to not lose weight. Except for it takes discipline and not eating more of the stuff I want to eat. The fact that I'm so wishy-washy...  is that a triumph of heart over head?  
I have one area in particular where my heart continually pulls at me to do something that would be irrational. The fact that I can't seem to let it go would tell me that the pull of the heart is probably stronger than the head.  
But this whole think makes me think, if the head is so much better, why do we have the heart? 
I'm gonna explore this more, but in a different post. For now, not sure, but I'm pretty certain that the dichotomy, while it may be useful, is also somewhat muddled. 
Both seem like basic senses we utilize in order to make sense of a situation. Yeah, I'm not sure how to answer this one right now. 
14. You usually prefer just doing what you feel like at any given moment instead of planning a particular daily routine 
If left to my own, I prefer not having a particular plan. But if I have responsibilities, I do usually like a plan because I recognize I'm not so capable of mentally organizing myself. My preferred weekends are the ones where I don't have anything in particular to do. I mean I always have to go grocery shopping for my mom and aunt, and then mom looks forward to that time when I visit her too. She can't get out of the house without help, so she really needs us to come visit her. So that's an "every weekend" obligation that I have to take care of. That makes it sound like I don't want to do it, which isn't true, but anything that you have to do turns into an obligation sooner or later. 
This one may be one of the simpler answers for me to give. 
15. You rarely worry about whether you make a good impression on people you meet 
I want people to like me. I consider this a character flaw I have. Or if not exactly a flaw, something I definitely need to work on. Of course, I'm not sure if I want to be the kind of person who absolutely doesn't care at all what kind of impression he makes. My guess is that person would not be much fun to be around, but I may be wrong. 
I would much rather be liked by people. So I do want to make a good impression on people. But as I read the question, it's about how much I worry about this. So maybe a more careful reading would be that I probably don't actually 'worry' about this. I want people to like me, but in the rare instances I don't, do I worry about it, not really. Especially if I've just met them. I've enough experience with people to believe I'm generally a decent person that people like. If I find someone who disagrees, I chalk it up to not being their cup of tea and that's fine.  
But while I want people to like me, and I don't worry if they don't, do I worry about making a good impression? In trying to think what that would look like, I guess I'd want them think I'm friendly, concerned about them, and hopefully they'll think I have a sense of humor. I think I don't worry about this. Mainly because I believe those things will come through. 
There we go, question answered. I rarely worry about whether I make a good impression on people I meet. 
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artur123232 · 1 year
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Do you Know your Allemande Left from your Allemande Right.
When I think about having a normal relationship with food (by which I mean a relationship that's mostly uncomplicated by diet culture's rules), I think about housemates I used to live with when I was younger. I don’t think thoughts of dieting or body image ever even occurred to them, or at least not in any kind of persistent way. You don’t need to include all these items to prove your relationship is real. Charcoal is often tested but is likely to need treatment to remove contaminants. Action to Take: You need to first understand intimacy and what it means to you and your partner. You can say something like, “I want to be here for you, but I don’t think I have the emotional resources or expert knowledge to give you the support you really need and deserve. And to be clear, I don’t think individuals are at fault for their eating behaviors or should be blamed for somehow failing to be “normal.” And I don’t mean to pathologize or criticize ways of eating that are not what I’m calling normal. I don’t think they ever counted calories, restricted food, or went on a diet.
It’s tough to define exactly, but I think it’s made up of a few different components, some of which are about our eating behaviors, and some that have to do with our attitudes about food and eating. Individuals with borderline personality disorder tend to display black-and-white thinking and are sensitive to others' attitudes toward them. The interpretation of the coefficient depends on the topic of study.When studying things that are difficult to measure, we should expect the correlation coefficients to be lower (e.g. above 0.4 to be relatively strong). In these kinds of studies, we rarely see correlations above 0.6. For this kind of data, we generally consider correlations above 0.4 to be relatively strong; correlations between 0.2 and 0.4 are moderate, and those below 0.2 are considered weak.When we are studying things that are more easily countable, we expect higher correlations. For example, with demographic data, we we generally consider correlations above 0.75 to be relatively strong; correlations between 0.45 and 0.75 are moderate, and those below 0.45 are considered weak. Babe Escort - בייב אסקורט For example, I sometimes eat a lot of cake, enough that my stomach starts to hurt. “Narcissists can’t feel fulfilled in relationships, or in any area of their lives, because nothing is ever special enough for them,” she adds.
People who feel loved are able to love others more freely. If you feel like it’s all more than you are equipped to handle right now, it’s OK to lay down personal boundaries, King says. This goes against the end goal of remaining a safe person for your friend to confide in down the line. Values over zero indicate a positive correlation, while values under zero indicate a negative correlation.A correlation of -1 indicates a perfect negative correlation, meaning that as one variable goes up, the other goes down. Even if there is a very strong association between two variables we cannot assume that one causes the other.For example suppose we found a positive correlation between watching violence on T.V. For example suppose it was found that there was an association between time spent on homework (1/2 hour to 3 hours) and number of G.C.S.E. I was but then I found my boo.
And if you think it would be helpful, consider seeking out your own mental health professional or domestic abuse counselor who can help you navigate your situation and process your feelings. They allow what and how they think they should eat to influence them over what their bodies are telling them. Pongo is a dalmatian from the film, "101 Dalmatians." This intelligent dog is one of the central characters in the movie and is the father of the litter of 15 puppies that are kidnapped. For example, being a patient in hospital is correlated with dying, but this does not mean that one event causes the other, as another third variable might be involved (such as diet, level of exercise). Causation means that one variable (often called the predictor variable or independent variable) causes the other (often called the outcome variable or dependent variable).Experiments can be conducted to establish causation. For example, it would be unethical to conduct an experiment on whether smoking causes lung cancer. It could be that the cause of both these is a third (extraneous) variable - say for example, growing up in a violent home - and that both the watching of T.V. It’s important to verify your suitor is who they say they are by checking where else their photos are posted.
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Update #30 - Changes for the New Year
Wow, it's been a year, so much has been going on. It's hard to say what to focus on, though since this is mostly a journal guess that'll just be personal experiences.
So now I'm 28, in my fourth year at my job, and making a manager-level salary without taking on manager-level responsibility, living on my own in a decently affordable apartment in one of the most expensive cities, and just getting by. Honestly, this life sounds fantastic on paper, but then there's the other stuff: dealing with a murdered brother, dealing with depression, and just the world in general. It's a mixed bag.
However, the negatives are no longer going to determine my outlook. Thanks to some therapy and with some aid from some medication (which was prescribed by and is under direct supervision from a medical professional) some changes are underway.
The most significant change going forward is my eating and working out habits. With a newly drafted spreadsheet and a heavy amount of research, I'm going to focus on the best and healthiest practices for diet and exercise. There will be ups and downs and many road bumps, but this is a genuine effort to try and feel comfortable in my body. The whole plan is divided up by calorie counting, food tracking, exercise schedule, and use of ranges. Knowing that many diets end due to being too restrictive, the use of ranges will allow wiggle room and also help make sure that it won't affect any anal retentiveness that might occur. I'm really hopeful and excited to try this.
Another change is to try and live in the moment and be the person I would like to meet when just going about town. You know, someone who is kind, caring, listening, charismatic, empathetic, funny, engaging, and generally lovely. Something akin to Mr. Rogers, it'd be a remarkable achievement if that were possible. It'd be something not just to do to make others happy, but I'd be glad to be able to give that happiness to others, it's been too long since I used to be like that.
Finally, well not finally, but for this post, the last change will be to actively pursue dreams, not just work with someone else on theirs. I want to work on projects I crafted and care about, and do things that feel good to me. I'll still help others with their stuff, but my own projects will take precedence. Just wait and see, there are going to be extraordinary things coming in this next year.
All right, enough with my babbling, I hope you have a good day, whoever you are. And hope whatever changes for next year you want to see come true do. Goodbye, A.A. Lopez
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