#which everyone kinda likes to forget

[ajdrawshq]

so like. ive played pmd sky dozens of times over a majority of my life right. i have never seen a map like this

thats just a weird hallway. what is this

#like. huh #ironically Riku got the all terrain hiker iq thing so he can just walk over the void areas which makes this dungeon SO much better #i love chasm caves music but the dungeon is hell to traverse #pmd #also i picked up like. 6 or so legendaries at crystal crossing #that place was fuckin packed!! idk why everyone was there but i got like. ho-oh celebi shaymin deoxys.. n a few more im forgetting #the celebi was shiny .. i cant remember if u can recruit non shiny celebi in sky or not tbh #kinda funny seeing them not in the future #edit. just found a dialga in here. got tired of dusknoirs failures lmao

[testing-reblogs]

Get real!!!!

#what if i #boy who struggled so hard with making it simple enough for me to comfortably recreate but also i love adding pointless things ill forget so #see how long it takes for me to completely forget to draw the second smaller pin on the jacket #heavy metal core who is definitely very much a core and not a turret thats just convinced everyone that they're a core nuh uh #one day ill think of more ways to making my turret android designs more distinct from cores bc rn they kinda got the Octoling treatment #which is technically different species but the differences in base appearance are actually pretty minor like its just the suckers and eyes #but im not gonna stress myself over it but its something ill get to whenever i feel like it #unfortunately i had a stomach ache so ended up sleeping until 4pm then getting to play games with my friend gave me motivation at 11 pm #i should really just write how my day was in a separate post bc i talk a whole lot <3 #heavy metal core #heavy metal core aperture tag #portal 2 #aperture tag

[todayisafridaynight]

I’m fairly new to the fandom, but I do have a question if you can answer it! Why do people ship Daigo with Aoki / Masato? I tried looking to see if they’ve interacted before, but couldn’t find anything! Sorry for asking I’m just </3 dumb AND I LOVE YOUR ART OF THEM!!! Nerd looking ahhhhhh

hi ! welcome to the community i hope you're having a lovely time so far and ty for enjoyin my stuff :) no need for apologies it's a very fair question to have :]

i cant speak for everyone (all. ten people into masadai anyway) but Personally To Me i just think the idea of them together is very funny. thats quite literally it im afraid..

#snap chats #//twenty page google doc in the background// ignore that. it's mostly for comedic purposes #might also be my fault idk sorry about that. allegedly. idk ive had like three people tell me they started to ship them cause of me 🧍‍♂️ #@mementoasts is another person who's drawn masadai and whose stuff i love and am inspod by .. i love their disneyland fic sm ... #there was another artist on twitter who posted a neat drawing of them but i cant remember who they were and i didnt bookmark it //screams// #recently there's been ANOTHER masadai artist ive started following on twitter - @wifekiryu. his account's n/s/f/w fyi before you go looking #he has a tumblr too @foxdies. i say cause i realized as much recently vjeaKLGJALKGJ #oh but I GUESS ill get deeper into why. /i/ personally ship masadai or whatever #first off they're opposing factions yet their character alignments Do Not Match their roles. stereotypically anyway #aoki who leads the 'surface' of society and is meant to be an admirable figure and someone 'just' when really. he sucks LMAO #though that's not atypical of politicians but just from a stereotypical This Is A Respectable Individual perspective of his role #daigo on the other hand leads the 'underbelly' of society- yk comprised of dangerous criminals and outcasts and whatnot #yet as we know him daigo's compassionate and considerate of his men- he doesnt treat them like tools like aoki does #if put in a room with the two daigo would be most people's choice of person to hang out with. probably open a trapdoor on aoki tbh #and i think thats really cool and epic i always love that kinda Subverting Expectations thing #theres also the fact they both started off like. edgy/angsty in the franchise and then brush up down the line #masato does a stronger 180. publicly. obviously but its still really funny they both have to get their act together #if you wanna talk about in-text reasons. there really is none LMAO I TELLS YOU masadai is pure crack #but if i wanted to pull a muscle reaching then there's daigo being on aoki's side while everyone else is on arakawa's during the funeral #im lying of course. mitsu was behind him. rgg tryna make me forget mitsu exist .... put him back in y8 .... #and ofc ichi joins that side to even out the seating but moving on another Goofy Reason is arakawa being like #'the chairman and my son are like p much the same age Surely he knows how he thinks :)' #and then i just think daigo being all smarmy about outsmarting aoki is really goofy and im choosing to interpret that as personal #they both also have issues with their dad. s. dad/s/. anyway. #tbh the google doc tag was a joke but i really could sit here and list every dumb reason why i think theyre funny together #like i started going over the tag limit so uhhhh yeah needless to say i have a lot of. dumb reasons 💀💀💀💀 #one day ill use the main text for long rambles like this but todays not that day Point Is my imagination is rampant im afraid #so the short and sweet of it is I Think It's Funny. And They'd Be Terrible Together. Which Is Why It's Funny. #and the unfortunate part is anything i find funny i obsess over for a year so. //gestures to the mountain of bullshit thats my masadai tag/

[beansprean]

sometimes you get diagnosed with ADHD as an adult which finally makes your mom actually listen to what ADHD actually is and that she didn't cure it by making me do 100 jumping jacks as a kid when I got too hyper and then she realizes that she may have it too

And then you both realize that like 70% of the family probably also has adhd and that's why we are all Like That

#adhd #not art #like???? my moms side of the family were always weird to everyone but us #so informal and go with the flow and peppy but cycle through hobbies like toilet paper #never any drama bc we forget that we got mad and just get over it and were generally nice to people #we never learned to set boundaries with other people bc we all had invisible understood nd boundaries #and just didnt ask each other weird questions #like turns out we r just a super nd family???? but it makes sense??? #my 2 cousins were diagnosed as kids but they were the only ones that was when adhd was starting to be understood as a childhood disability #but you only got diagnosed if u were getting bad grades etc so me and my sister got overlooked and everyone else was too old #but DEF my granny has combined like me and my mom has hyperactive type and probably my uncle as well #and my great aunt bipolar i wouldnt be surprised if she had comorbidities her daughter idk tho #great grandparents hard to say but i wouldn't be surprised and time will tell with cousins kids #would not be surprised to see some autism in there im sure my sis on the spectrum and i may be too but with adhd its hard to differentiate #anyway this is a v personal post but its kinda crazy to look back and be like huh #thats why the fam dynamic is so different from everyone elses #we dont talk to each other for years but relationships dont deteriorate in our heads so nbd #now my dads side....my dad does have a lot of adhd symptoms as well as his dad #plus Alzheimers runs thru there which has a slight predilection for adhd anyway #why would a bunch of intelligent chatty anxious and kind people choose to live in the middle of nowhere and have silly hobbies #why neurodivergency my friend #ANYWAY the culture shock of moving away from that as a child and my parents remarrying neurotypicals who didnt understand the dynamics #dunno if it was the southern thing or the nt thing but turns out the normal way i always interacted with my parents #was seen by others as deeply disrepectful mean teenager nonsense that should be culled #shout out to the nd kids with nd parents who just spoke to each other like adults and played with each other like kids #this is TOO MANY TAGS thats how u know the vyvanse kicked in #personal

[valiant-portabella-pirkko]

At last... The final mount unlock.

Scarlet can have an extra fluffy skyscale, as a treat.

#GW2 #Guild Wars 2 #Scarlet Briar #i technically unlocked it like 2 days ago #i just kept forgetting to actually announce it HDHFDHGDFH #anyway she gets a lunar mane and there's a story behind it #where the hatchling was a rude little thing that kept nipping its siblings and gorrik could Not figure out what to do about it #and the Commander was zero help and none of Taimi's suggestions were working either #so. he RELUCTANTLY asked Ceara; at that point they don't know each other well yet and she's only Kind Of turned her life around #so she's like. hm. irritable little baby creature. doesn't seem to like its siblings. doesn't respect authority. hm. mood. #she separates it from the other hatchlings and decides to let it take the lead and show her what it wants #she notices it keeps messing with and chewing on its leg. takes a look: it's angry at the tracker (which is why it doesn't like Gorrik) #apparently the critter remembered where he put it and decided it Does Not Like That. so she ignores his protests and removes it #and. it calms down. just like that. it still avoids the other hatchlings and glares at Gorrik occasionally but can be fairly friendly #but the final detail that seals the deal #is that it looks a lot like a minotaur calf when it's young #and one of my many headcanons is that Ceara has a soft spot for minotaurs (hence why her first steam creature is one) #so she decides it's extremely cute and keeps spoiling it with treats #and then. surprise. it keeps Following Her Home #so everyone just kinda decides. yeah that's her problem now. #it's a very soft and fluffy thing but if you're rude it Will take your fingers #anyway. that's all for the lore hours. //scurries away

[keeps-ache]

woke up with the feeling that 'something has been irreversibly changed'

#just me hi #which doesn't make any sense because i didn't really do anything yesterday lol #but then i got hit with that very accepting 'so this must be' feeling so i have No idea what's going on with my internals hfvsfhaj #though i Have been feeling odd‚ maybe it's turned over #i dunno! feelings are like magic is so many ways #/maybe that's why people like to tie it to Actual magic. something physical #because it's a way to see it‚ to understand it‚ to prove to other people it's there #but real magic is very hard to understand and sometimes even to imitate and sometimes people don't like to see it at all #which is sad because it's so pretty‚ and when you feel it in like your actual Body it's wonderful #but it showed how Physically strong you were then you aren't being awful in some way. then you're Scary and Powerful #but that's just awful too. they don't realize it until someone awful does it but they forget everyone else is like that too #i'm having Just Woke Up thoughts bfhvsbhfv #i want to like. just Be but things are kinda complicated you know? #like magic.. #lol! #//anyway #gotta finish this comic for REAL #truly really seriously !! #i'm almost done with the inks and i KNOW i can do it today i can do it i can do it !! #couldn't yesterday (idk why lol) but i Can today so i will :D #do i shall see you again soon! tooooodles

[vexweylin]

Finally got myself to accept that I will probably never properly match most of the animals I see myself as behaviour/exact looks wise because of what I am

#like. aside from the dog thing and maybe the mustelid stuff #all of these things are just different Shapes to me . being in the shape of a human doesnt make me naturally act like a human and being in #the shape of a fox doesn't make me act like a fox #and unlike the human shit i dont have a distaste for it and i have no need/urge to research behaviours so i can mimic them #idk. i feel more inline with like. subtle horror stuff? ig #like. by all intents i look like the animal but i dont act like it and maybe i move wrong and i have too many teeth and the fur is coarse #which i dont really mind ! but theres alot of. warranted. focus on Knowing about What You Are in these spaces and i often get caught up in #it because i forget im not the same type of thing as everyone else. #if i had to describe it in community terms i guess id call it more of. a link thing. shrugs #im that animal because its what i prefer to Look Like or atleast look like with adjustments. and it kinda stops there. its more complicated #than that but thats the basics of it i think #an animal that can talk

[blole-hack]

me who's bad at reading emotion cues of people reacting to bkdk no hero academia leaks: ...oh mm ok

bkdks sharing their thoughts on super super subtle details: OMG LOOK GUYS SEE

me: OHHH OHH OHHHHHHHHHHHH

#which is why i now rely on reading everyone else's thoughts on the chapters #now I'm just like #"ok imma try this interpreting thing myself...ok i got nothing. *scrolls through bkdk tag #*suddenly reaches enlightenment* #its kinda ironic how I'm really subtle emotionally outwardly #but i can't really tell emotions of people if its subtle #bakudeku #so i have to look at the hands too #i keep forgetting to do that #this is why i love meta posts so much

[rimouskis]

open streets is seriously the best thing this city does

#that being said: every single year I forget what a crowd this draws ahahaha #and honestly it's about the sort of crowd it draws: it draws EVERYONE. #people of all transit modes (bikers/runners/walkers/skateboarders/rollerbladers+skaters/people with strollers/etc.) #and within that -- people of all skill levels #like... lots of families with younger kids; lots of people who maybe aren't familiar with the ~rules of the road~ #i.e. ''slower traffic please keep to the right'' ahaha #I called out ''ON YOUR LEFT'' many many times this morning #also this month's route went fully through downtown which meant lots of traffic stops and some seriously bad bottlenecking there #and I also think there were more mandatory ''dismount your bike and walk'' areas than past ones #so between the traffic stops + bottlenecks + walking areas the flow was kinda... y'know #I normally try to do the route 3-4 times but today I just did it once (and it was a long route!) and then ditched to go trail ride hahaha #still fun though!

[silverislander]

got through another church service :) (people wouldn't stop touching me without asking) (got guilt tripped abt not coming around anymore twice) (extremely aware i was being watched and judged the whole time) (everyone only seems to remember my brothers accomplishments) (they still fucking do gendered call and responses in 2023)

#but fuck it! i got through it #the guilt tripping doesnt work anymore anyway so i just kinda. roll w it #theyll be like 'wow its been such a Long Time... we miss you...' and then hit me with the boomer stare. jokes on you bc i just smile + nod #now were both staring at each other in silence and you made it awkward. who feels guilty now pamela #levi.txt #seriously tho im so fucking tense my shoulders hurt. i hate how everyone feels the right to fucking touch me at church so much #i KNOW you want to say hi and thats fine just PLEASE dont come up behind me and clap your hands on my shoulders #i will gladly shake your hand or whatever. you dont need to physically grab me we can be normal abt this i promise #unfortunately i have a really bad freeze response so i usually cant manage 'please dont do that' or 'stop' if startled #and the womens/mens call and responses? how are we still. doing that #idk i didnt expect them to be trans affirming all of a sudden or whatever ik theyre transphobic im just. ugh. bad surprise #and watching people try to 'subtly' look and see which lines im reading or why i sound Like That. it makes me feel like a zoo animal #i forget how much church is an anxiety trigger for me. fuck #glad its over. i only have to go on christmas eve and easter while im living at home and thats fair enough for me

[infinitethree]

Hi Day and whoever happens to be around! I have an odd question for you. How is it that the monsters and such in SMPza is so different from the ones from the Sanctuary reality? Shouldn't both be alittle more similar in that regard? How was there a den of chimeric creatures in SMPza but not in Sanctuary?

Day is sitting in his den, evidently having been working on knitting a blanket. With him is Perce, who is sprawled out on one of the couches. The younger Dream variant is paying extremely close attention to the movie on the TV.

Perce jumps at the sound of the question, enough so to send himself crashing to the floor.

Day peers over at him, but doesn’t go to help him up. He’s well aware that his second youngest son is no stranger to bumps, bruises, and being attacked by multiple people after a prank got a little too far under their skin. “You good?” “I got ambushed by a disembodied voice in my own home,” Perce complains. “What about that is good?”

A moment passes, and Day points out, “If I wanted to be a smartass, I’d tell you that technically, it’s my home–” “Dad, really?!” “But I’ll restrain myself,” he finishes, despite the outburst.

His second youngest points an accusatory finger at him. “That’s a dick move and you know it.” 

With an incredulous scoff, Day tells him, “Perseus, you got multiple board games banned and I’ve had to set rules for what's acceptable for family movie night.” “There wasn’t anything saying I couldn’t splice together the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy–” “Yeah, because none of your brothers thought to do it. You gave them the idea and now we all have to suffer the consequences.”

Even though he huffs like he’s annoyed, Perce has a wide grin as he flops back down on the sofa. “No regrets.” 

“I’m aware.” Much like Perce, Day has a smile and his tone is warm, if a little exasperated.

His son refocuses him by saying, “Disembodied voice has a point, though. Everything I hear about the SMPza makes it sound weird. Wasn’t your theory that it’s made out of your admin light– or whatever it was you called it? Why’s it so different than here, then?”

There’s a furrow of Day’s brow as he tries to explain it. Some of the evidence he has is little more than a gut feeling– a sense that the world wasn’t allowed to diverge from the first life he had had in certain ways. Some events seemed fated to happen, even if that meant things or people bending and stretching in ways that they shouldn’t.

“...Too many similarities,” he murmurs. Perce argues, “Dad, we’re cosmically the same person.” 

“No it’s– not in the same way." He chews on his lip for a moment before trying to explain, "That reality never felt– right, I guess. No other world has felt like that. They feel solid and– real, I guess? But the SMPza had this sort of surreality to it. And the ghosts I saw would sometimes…snap back, to what they were like in my first life. Ghoulus would suddenly get upset around yellow or was afraid of Schlatt, for instance. A few times he called his brothers the wrong name."

His fingers skimming over some of his braids to try and lessen the sense of unease he has whenever he dwells on the SMPza for too long. “I don’t know; it might just have been how I lived. Things felt more concrete after I met your brothers. All that time on my own might have just fucked with my head." 

It wouldn't be the first time his perspective has turned out to be horribly warped. Sometimes he worries that he still jumps at shadows that aren't really there. 

With a sigh, he continues, "I don’t have a good answer, and I can’t have a good answer. That’s the realm of the divine, and I’m not really interested in stepping on any toes by demanding an explanation. I’ll deal with potential revelations when and if they happen.”

He tilts his head to the side a little. He can’t say he isn't glad for the change of topic, but he’s a little confused about why the Observers are asking at all.

Aren't they agents of Time? Even if they might not know everything– or even a lot of things– it feels like this would be something they would already know.

…Maybe he needs to re-examine what he thought he knew about them. After all, Theo had only recently told him that they're called Observers.

"Sort of yes, sort of no," he admits. "Ender chests work no matter where we go, so in that sense, yes. We've tested them on other servers here l, and they're empty– so it’s not just us."

His wings ruffle a little as he continues, "But we go to realities without servers entirely or servers that aren't the Dream SMP fairly regularly."

Perce makes a noise of confusion at him. Day tells him, "Question about if everywhere we go is a variation of the Dream SMP."

"Ah," his second youngest says. "Obviously not. We go to single realm worlds all the time! One of the perks of Dad and Theo traveling is that they can pick out safe worlds to have a little vacation in. My personal favorites are the ones like Cat world; it’s places with that level of tech and comfort that give me games and shows and books–"

"And more ideas for how to be a menace," Day snorts. "That, too," Perce admits, "But you know you love seeing museums with Attie and Theo."

Day can’t help but smile at his memories. “You say that like you don’t like them, too.” He nudges Perce with a wing and teases, “You have extensive records of the differences between all the versions of the sets of your favorite movies.” “As anyone would!” “Mm, no, but that’s because we’re the cool family.”

He’s glad to see Perce damn near preen with pride. It would snow in the nether before he dissed one of his kids’ hobbies.

…Even if he still doesn’t understand redstone. He can manage to follow relatively simple instructions, but beyond that he’s hopeless. Dee has long since given up on it. Frankly, Day is a little glad for it; he knows that nobody enjoyed those lessons.

Except for Theo, who found it hilarious. And Orph, because he kept setting up bets on how long before Dee had to stop because he was giving himself another headache from frustration. And Atlas, because he would use it to double check his own fundamentals–

“Wait a minute,” he says, eyes narrowing. “Your brothers were using me as free entertainment.”

Perce stares at him, his confusion obvious. “...Did you seriously not realize that? No, wait, better question– what made you finally realize it?”

He’s pretty sure his expression gets across how he feels just a little insulted. “Not– I know they do in general, but I meant when Dee used to try and teach me redstone.”

A beat or two passes, and Perce asks, “...Didn’t that stop when he was like, thirteen?” “Yes.” There’s a longer pause, paired with further confusion. “...It took you sixteen years to realize that?” 

Day makes an offended noise. “Hey– there was a lot going on!” “For sixteen years?!” “Some of it, yes! And then I stopped thinking about it, because I had more important things to worry about!”

Perce sighs, and sits up to pat his shoulder. “Yeah, that’s true.” “Thank y–” “You can’t help that sometimes you’re a little dumb. Great at plenty of stuff, but in some ways…ehhh…”

Oh, those are fighting words. He smiles, and can tell his son realizes that he’s signed up for a lot of unexpected cardio from the way his eyes get wide. He warns, “You have until I secure my stitch before I start hunting.”

As expected of the Manhunt king, Perce doesn’t bother arguing– he just scrambles to his feet and starts booking it.

#asked&answered #long post #DayDreamer #CleverPerseus #chronotag #sometimes Perce forgets that his Dad's patience isn't infinite #but also by this point Day is one of the dozen or so people who CAN really challenge him #so like...he's just getting free practice #he has done that on purpose before #because he'll sometimes feel like Day goes easy on him #(which he's kinda right about tbf) #also yes I do have ages in mind for them #but ALSO I just kinda forget them a lot of the time #everyone is mentally late teens to mid twenties except for Lee #me: what do you mean that based on my own math Theo would have to be like 28 right now #that's illegal

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#ay ay ay. now that the soul crushing project is done ive elected to spend the week managing data #which is decidedly more chill than what ive been doing for the last month but also isnt not doing anything and it isnt getting stuff done #for when i have to move. so thats annoying. and ive been drawing again at least but i can feel the escalation in my controlling behavior #so its now very frustrating trying to draw anything. coloring is gonna take a million years rip. #also suddenly everyone wants to b social rn? like tomorrow my boss is organizing a thing with an old lab mate and this weekend a #collaborator is having a retirement party. and next week my lab mates wanna do a trivia night. and i kno that i should go to these things. #and i will try but i really dont want to go to any of it. mostly for driving reasons but also im a husk of a person rn. but the more #devastating thing is that uh next week one of the kids i grew up with is getting married to a rich girl lol. and like we werent that close #bc i was and am such an asocial freak but after the wedding my parents r picking up their new camper and camping their way across the #country with my sisters. and im sure someone probably told me the dates of these things at some point but if u tell me dates i will #instantly forget them. so thats. ya kno. happening over basically the next 2 weeks while i have to kill myself over measurements for a #different study i dont care abt. and like. its fine. ill see them mid may for a different planned trip. it just makes me kinda sad #a product of living halfway across the country i guess. im just inherently more disconnected to everyone. i would suspect thsts semi #intentional subconsciously. u cant b upset abt not being able to connect with ppl if you create enough physical distance that u never see #them in the 1st place. u cant misunderstand me if i make myself absent and unknowable. idk. i was explaining to my mum that i didnt realize #the timeline and she was like. understandable whatever u wanna do! and idk y that upsets me so much. i guess its just that i dont want to b #doing this. its causing me pain but dont kno how to articulate it in a way that makes sense. whatever. my mouth hurts. my lips r so chapped #that the irritation is spread past my lip line. probably doesnt help thst i keep rubbing at it lol. anyway things r still annoying #less soul crushing thsn last week but still frustrating #unrelated

[brawlqueen]

attempt was made ! all replies will be queued and i think anything holiday related won't expire for me unless you don't want the ask answered. like last month ! they'll just go under the 'seasonal / holiday' title on my asks because the brain fog is real / life amping up so ! also i think mi.zuki is the most smug santa .

also this was last year but still . love reindeer mi.zuki and san.ta a.iba. in my post-canon verse (which is divergent) they're still partners but shared also with d.ate obviously ! i think people should give them a chance since a.iba is a very very solid support system for mi.zuki and mi.zuki keeps aiba amused and can keep up with her in her own way, it's one of the few good things i liked about a.ini. oh well sometime i'll talk about how important a.iba is to her ! plus, the unlimited psyncs are hilarious and show their bond and they bounce off each other's wit and chaotic natures honestly. or rather they bring out the chaos in each other. different bonds but no less important imho ! but yeah i'll post this again later uh...closer to the holidays i guess ?

#idk there's so much vitriol about her having a.iba like...ai.ba canonly adores mi.zuki and supports her even when #mi.zuki hasn't lost her eye . . . please let mi.zuki have some support.... #it's not like she isn't being shared with d.ate still ! #the bonds are no less powerful ! #might do a few things but i'll def take it easy tomorrow bc birthday which i kinda....always forget is coming until it smacks me in the fac #𝐎𝐎𝐂 *ೃ༄ what looks gone but comes back even stronger. #who never got the parental b.ond canonly in a.i1 ? and a.iba always in every route is so fond of her sorry i'm just...sad #tra.shing mizu.ki bc she also uses ai.ba when i /know/ mor.e probably than mos.t as a mi.zuki writer like other mi.zuki writers how BADLY #a.ini is? is just not good. she's allowed to grow up. she's allowed to have a hamster support and partner with her and share her with d.ate #like i love everyone but her being only a roommate canonly is really upsetting in res route. #sorry sometimes i'm just like.....idk the double standards yikes #grabbing mi.zuki and ir.is and am.ame and ki.zuna in my hands #u deserve the world . . . oh grabs hi.tomi . . #i think some.day either d.ate retires and a.iba is the convenient family ai.ball she always has been for them or #mi.zuki if she gets an ai.ball i hope it's rabbit shaped she'd freak out lmao #or like clione shaped ??? #rabbit tho . . . #also holding b.oss and ta.ma in my hands #ai1 may be one of my all time fave games but that doesn't mean i don't want mi.zuki to grow up and evolve i guess is my tag wall #like she will not be 12 forever.

[coldvampire]

.

#anyway the most exciting conversation I had today was explaining how I managed to fuck up the dog’s haircut #(he’s squirmy that’s it that’s the reason) #moving on though the main issue is I still need like. the crutch of being online almost #and I guess even though it feels awkward and lowkey uncool I’m glad there are apps for people just looking to find friends #downside is I can forget they’re there bc the notifs don’t work great #or I panic because I’m too hyper aware of myself with new people. why can’t this be easy what’s wrong with me #I get embarrassed by how much longer my replies are than the other person’s #I can’t help it I guess #if it’s short I feel like it’s coming off inauthentic so I overcorrect #but then conversation kinda fizzles anyway. which is okay! not everyone will be a winner and that’s fine #I know this and it makes me feel slightly better #still I just feel like. dumb I guess. in all these interactions. #that’s the word. because I’m perfectly comfortable with myself until I feel like i start to notice That Change in someoneone #anyone else who gets told they give off Uncanny Valley energy knows what this is. #like I can tell I did something wrong but on paper I did everything right #and I just kinda fold every time. bc there’s usually no salvaging a conversation past that point. #it’s Not that it’s easier to be alone bc I’m not having a good time clearly but something drives me to keep going despite it all #idk it’s stupid I wish I could just cut this feeling out and detach completely #I know it wouldn’t bother me to be pushed slowly away at least. #I’d really be the person who solved the lament configuration just to Hang Out lmao #I wish I didn’t make posts like these here btw. #that also makes me feel dumb but it’s like if I don’t at least put this down somewhere it’d be worse #I think tomorrow I’ll clean a bit. it’ll be something to do that has a visible result. #not like anything else that’s going on lol

[mwagneto]

im finally done with all my exams this was literally the most exhausting month/2 months of my fucking life. and i get one day off bc im doing something on literally every other day but that's gonna be fun im not complaining

#im finally gonna see my friends againnn my god #i literally only saw them during exams and i haven't seen my pre uni friends since summer it's DIRE #i have to squeeze visiting my sister and hanging out with 2 of them into one day coz otherwise it #literally wouldn't fit anywhere else MDMDKDMDNHD christ #and then on Wednesday.... heh😏 #barking #my fucking god i need to fit 100000 years of sleep into today coz im lit rally gonna be busy as hell #it's so annoying coz I'm rly happy i finally get to hang out properly with everyone again #but at the same time im like why did you plan stuff when you could just sleep and relax:/ #NO i literally miss them so much and I'd just be bored at home anyway #I'd have pretty much the whole month off but somehow i managed to cram it full of stuff and im #also traveling on Wednesday and wont be back til late February which im also kinda all over the #place about coz im so excited but im also like mad at myself for leaving instead of #enjoying being home alone with nothing to do finally but yk. I'd just be bored #also the month/2 months thing all but one of my exams was in the past 30 days but i #had an insane december too with like 50 assignments an exam sickness 3 birthdays christmas and #traveling to someone's house in a different city for half a week and like a bunch of other shit im forgetting #point is my fucking GOD I'm having fun but i need a fucking break for real I'm running myself into the ground #at least im done with these stupid Fucking exams and my average of seminar + lecture grades is #gonna be like 4.0 which is beyond perfect i thought I'd get like 2.5 lmfaooooo #(grades go from 1 to 5‚ 1 is fail 2 is pass 3 is satisfactory 4 is good 5 is excellent) #(like that's literally their official names that's not me calling them that djdnridjeidjdj) #i thought i just wouldn't study at all and skirt by with 3s and 4s like i usually do but i #actually got a lot of 5s im amazed. like genuinely who am i #anyway this is long lmao tldr sorry i haven't been on much im just constantly busy lmao😭 #oh and also im not even going to meet my pre uni friends coz neither me or them have any fawking time

[maschotch]

hi again!

i am naturally ever so soft for emily prentiss but oh my GOODNESS that beautiful character study?

“there was always a sickening layer of sin over her skin” — my God. How painfully true. And she knows it too, the look on her face at the end of Demonology as she gazes up at the church with that little bit of blood trickling out her nose says it all. 😭

and is there anything more heartbreakingly accurate to described Hotch than “A calculated tenderness.” 🥺💛

i loved it 💛

- 🦢

ahhh this is so nice!!

i really don’t write emily as much as i should but it’s hard to convey her energy… soo much of her character is dependent on pg’s mouth movements delivery, and it’s hard to hit that sweet spot between free-spirited and caring

akhdksh i really didnt intend that sin part to be a reference.. i was actually a little reluctant bc im rarely willing to casually slip in some religious-type word, but “she felt icky” didnt seem to cover itskdjskhx but i like the parallel! i probably have more to say on emily and religion but i couldnt think of any other way to describe just how ingrained her regret is and how everythings shes done feels like a permanent stain that she can never wash off

“calculated tenderness” WAS intentional bc i feel like it really does encapsulate his behavior. hotch being reserved yet unabashed in his kindness is such a weird contradiction (which again id like to give credit to the actor for) but it suits him so well. he’s either afraid to feel or express his love, but he can’t help it. and i think each member of the team comes to realize the depth of his affection in their own time.. emily just happens to be incredibly observant, so i think she notices it the fastest (especially bc she witnessed it before she experienced it for herself). i could really talk ab this all day skdhskd

#ok see the reason i dont write character studies that often is because i can talk for sooooo long ab them #and i love talking about it so i love that you sent this ask—i just have to stop myself from writing an essay in response #it fucking sucks bc it seems like sometimes the team just… forgets that hotch cares and they have to relearn that all over again #which is some fucking bullshit #garcia does it the most—which is kinda odd tbh bc she tends to look on the bright side #she’s so brave and open about who she is but for some reason she’s insecure when it comes to hotch #even tho he’s never reprimanded her.. she thinks she’s constsntly disappointing him #reid forgets ab how much hotch cares pretty often but tbh its somethin he unintentionally does w everyone #he can get stuck in his own little bubble sometimes and i think he just? forgets that other people experience emotion? #(when i talk ab reid being emotionally immature this is always what im talking about) #derek forgets in his own way… like… he always knows that hotch cares for the team #he just forgets that that includes HIM #akdhskhd idk how it happens but its like he doesnt realize that he’s loved as an individual #emily does something similar… she recognizes that hotch cares ab the team (including her) #but she feels guilty about it #she subconsciously distances herself from the rest but its too late: hotch cares about her too #and i dont think hotch can stop caring once he starts #asks #n e ways. skipping the update today akdhsk i’ll either post two tomorrow or three on friday #ive got two exams tmrw so obviously instead of studying or writing i had to obsess over mob psycho #priorities