#when i do i can’t find the motivation to finish of my WIP and i feel so bad for my followers

[rose-tea-and-strawberries]

A Game Of Cat And Mouse

Leona Kingscholar and Che’nya x Fem!Jerry Mouse!Reader 

Note: Reader is Yuu/The magicless Ramshackle Prefect from another world

I have a ton of WIPs that I really want to complete but to help motivate myself to finish them I decided to write this

So Jerry’s personality seems to fluctuate depending on his iteration so I’m just going to tone down his more sadistic tendencies and make him more like the early shorts where he’s more mischievous and acts when provoked instead of going out of his way to ruin Tom’s life for no reason. 

Honestly as a Tom girlie I felt so sorry for Thomas. There were times where that poor cat did not deserve what he went through - even when I was little I would root for him. Though this might just be an oldest child thing since my little sister and mum (who’s the youngest in her family) prefer Jerry.

LEONA KINGSCHOLAR 

Honestly, his first impression of you wasn’t the best. Yeah, you’re a girl and he chugs gallons of respecting women juice for every meal but come on - you’re this tiny little mousegirl from another world who can’t even do magic (not to mention that he’s heard rumours that you don’t even speak that much). You’ll get eaten alive!

Then he met you and all of that went down the drain

The meeting went as it usually does: you stepped on his tail, he angrily confronts you (whilst subtly warning you of the dangers of NRC) but then you just give him this flat, unamused look.

“Hey pussycat,” you deadpan, raising an eyebrow and crossing your arms as you jut your chin up so you level him with a glare, “maybe don’t go leaving your tail lying around everywhere if you don’t want people to step on it.”

Okay, so maybe you weren’t the meek little mouse that he thought you were. Even the predators in his dorm don’t have the guts to talk back to him. Honestly, respect.

Then word gets out that you defeated an overblot and his opinion of you gets more and more favourable.

Long story short, you start dating after his overblot.

And it does cause a few turned heads.

And who can blame them? A lion going out with a mouse. That’s definitely something.

And to the untrained eye, it does sound concerning. But to those who know you (read: have been around you for more than five minutes)? Well, they’re praying for Leona’s sanity because you are nothing more than an agent of chaos.

There was this one time before you and Leona got together where a bunch of Savanaclaw predators were trying to push you, Ace, Deuce and Grim around and without even blinking you just pummelled all of them right then and there. At one point during the curb stomp battle you just pulled a mallet out of nowhere and just started thrashing everyone until they were black and blue. 

Congratulations the entire Savanaclaw dorm is terrified of you

All that training with Big Cousin Muscles really does wonders

NRC have two new rules: 1) don’t even think about going after the nagicless prefect because you will lose and even if you try to use magic she will dodge and it will be your funeral and 2) DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES hurt Ace, Deuce or Grim because that will probably be the last thing you ever do (memories of Jerry completely annihilating Tom after he hurt Nibbles are resurfacing)

One thing he admires about you is your cunning and intelligence and how you’re always a step ahead of everyone no matter what their plans are. Even when you do find yourself in trouble 

Even Rook Hunt has trouble trying to catch you. Don’t worry though, he’s far too fond of ‘petite mademoiselle souris’ to be irked by that.

He does get jealous of how close you are with Ruggie though. Since the hyena is also a greedy little thieving bugger like you, you have found a kindred spirit in him. The two of you bond over raiding the NRC kitchen and making off with as much as you can. And also taking the mickey out of Leona.

 You also get along great with Cheka. He’s noticed that you have a soft spot for children and other animals. The pro is that he gets his nephew off of his back by pawing him off to you (who he knows will make sure that no harm will come to him) the con is that you get along too well and your chaotic natures mixing will probably send him to an early grave - if your mischievous and provoking nature doesn’t already.

One thing he loves to do is tease you over your mouse-like qualities. Yeah, anyone with eyes can tell that you’re nowhere near as innocent as you look but those mouse ears, wide eyes, squeaks and cute little tail are objectively and indisputably adorable. He takes great pleasure in telling you how cute ‘his little mouse’ is, especially when you give such sweet reactions when you're flustered.

Though he does get taken aback by how bold you are. You definitely did that thing Jerry does where he holds mistletoe above his head and made kissing noises at Tom.

Your high pitched laugh makes his heart melt and he definitely uses his rich boy money to buy you all of the expensive cheese you can eat.

CHE’NYA

He loves you so much. Finally, someone he can be chaotic with - you’re a match made in hell.

His interest in you starts when he tries to sneak up on you whilst invisible but you pull one over him and just turn around, look directly into his unseeable eyes and sprAY WATER RIGHT ONTO HIS FACE-WHAT THE HELL?! WHERE DID YOU EVEN GET THAT SPRAY BOTTLE FROM????

At first he was pleasantly surprised before his face broke into a Cheshire Cat grin. He felt cupid’s arrow hit him square in the chest and he just looked at you with heart eyes.

By asking Trey and Cater and hiding in the rose maze, he gathered enough information to decide that you are his future wife

Turns out that your troublemaking antics have you paired with Ace and Floyd for the position of ‘bane of Riddle Rosehearts’ existence’. Mainly because everytime you break a rule you always, without fail, evade punishment by avoiding getting caught - even when you are clearly the culprit

Trey has bribed you with so many cheese based baked goods to stop you from sneaking into Heartslabyul and causing mayhem (you felt sorry for him so you promised him that you’ll only steal from the main kitchen near the cafeteria. That’s not what he meant but he’ll take it)

One day he catches you kidnapping the dorm’s pet dormouse before an unbirthday party so that you ‘can help your fellow mice by freeing them from their subjugation’. He shrugs and nods in understanding before asking you if he should let out the flamingos and hedgehogs from their pens as a distraction. 

And so a beautiful relationship was born as the two of you ran off with a tray of choux pastries and a bunch of angry card soldiers chasing you.

The two of you have a competition over who can sneak into and stay in Heartslabyul the longest without getting caught and you’re currently the winner.

He loves that you’re not scared of anyone and you’re not afraid to stand up to people that are almost quadruple your size. In fact, he’s there cheering you on whenever you fight back or plot your revenge (he does know that he has a whole other school to attend, right?). One time you showed him one of your revenge plans and he even helped you set the traps and everything. Oh the two of you working together has NRC running for the hills.

Like Leona, he does like to tease you but what do you expect? He’s a cat, you’re a mouse - that’s nature. Though he does love the fact that you’re always one step ahead of him whenever he does try to outsmart you. He loves a good puzzle and you certainly keep him on his toes.

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #leona kingscholar x reader #che'nya x reader #fem reader

[sitp-recs]

HP Rec Fest, Day 12

Today’s prompt challenges me once again as I never rarely start fics before they’re completed. By the Grace was the last WIP I followed since the beginning so it’s been a few years, but I’m always willing to make an exception for 25 Days of Drarry and @hprecfest gave me some extra motivation to find another advent fic to follow. This time I don’t have rare pair WIPs to share so I’m reccing two Drarry WIPs, one fairly recent and the other a 2020 fic I’ve been obsessed with ever since day one. Thrilled to be reccing two of my favourite authors here, cannot praise these two gems enough:

Day 12) A WIP you're following:

A Christmas Miracle by @sleepstxtic (E)

Draco is a world-renowned Magi-Diagnostician and Harry is a Cursebreaking Healer, both working in St. Mungo's. They're not-quite-friends, not-quite-lovers, who argue at work and have sex on the weekends. And they're both fine with it, thank you very much. But when a mysterious attack in the hospital leaves Draco trapped in a coma, Harry must do all he can to save him. All the while, an inexplicable, deadly, children's illness is spreading through wizarding London. Oh, and there's some Time Magic thrown into the mix.

just look at that summary! this fic was made for me and after reading the first few paragraphs (such a delightful opening scene!) I knew I’d be breaking my no wip rule and I regret nothing. that, and I also happen to be a slut for work colleagues slash fuck buddies, and Kat delivers in spades as per 😌 this fic is a mix of my fave things like competent Healer!Draco, time travel magic (!!!), case fic, delicious banter between this insufferable Draco and charming Harry. I’m having so much fun and can’t wait to see where this is going!

In The Dark by @bixgirl1 (E)

In the aftermath of an apocalypse, Harry receives an order to find and bring Draco Malfoy nearly a thousand miles, to the tenuous safety of Hogwarts. But more than distance separates them from their goal. The world has fallen, and death is hungry.

I cannot begin to describe how obsessed I am with this wip. even if it never gets finished it will have been so so worth it because this right here is one of the most vivid, creative and impressive world buildings I’ve ever seen. the urgent and dangerous atmosphere is superb and I love love love how Harry and Draco find solace in each other while facing a grim and terrifying inferi apocalypse. brilliant storytelling and delicious slow burn with creative magic, tender romance and heart stopping fight-or-flight sequences. a masterpiece!

#hprecfest2023 #day 12 #WIPs

[silenzahra]

@silenzahra Do you have any idea how much your comments touched me? When I was winding down, I was so surprised to find more comments in my Ao3 inbox when I was browsing for more SMB stories to read. You NEVER fail to give such detailed feedback by pointing out which details endeared you and giving me such praise and adulation which at times I need to pinch myself how my stories touched you and others who took time and care into read and provide comments…being called one of your favourite writers on Tumblr and Ao3 truly made me tear up and my heart pound with warmth…am I truly worthy of that title? There are surely others waaay better and more skilled than I am?! You are just so sweet and kind, my dear.

I have probably said it over and over again but I feel that it’s appropriate and well deserved: You are a wonderful writer and your writing and research skills truly astound me. I’m still coming back to your musicians and Luigi’s passion for books lore posts and they are some of the best I ever read and give me connection to these boys we adore. Your stories are amazing whether they’re complete or WIP. And the fact you took the time to translate them for us to read, I still can’t get over your dedication.

You may have recalled how I was so physically and mentally exhausted in yesterday’s post. And you and also many others like @keakruiser @itsavee4117 @peaches2217 @pepperycar @sourour-rl have been so kind to me and telling me to take it easy. It really makes me see how valued and loved I am in this community…so thank you to all my dears…

I am feeling a bit better and have managed to actually finish a drawing I wanted to do, play a game, sneak in a long deserved nap and revel in my husband’s and son’s loving affections…

I can’t thank you and our mutuals over and over again for finding my place of belonging here and all of your support and love to my stories and art. May we prosper and continue to love the SMB fandom, my dear.

AW, dear friend, finding this message in my inbox has filled my heart with so much joy! 💖💖💖 As I told you on AO3, you deserve all the praise and support in the world, as your writing style is definitely one of the sweetest, most detailed and touching I've ever read 🥹🥹🥹 You always move me to the core with your words and how you portray the characters' relationships, be it a romantic one or the brotherly bond between Mario and Luigi. So yes, of course you're one of my favorite writers!!! You ARE more than worthy of that title, dear friend 🫂🫂🫂💖💖💖

And oh my God, you're making me blush 😭😭😭 I feel so honored!!! I couldn't be happier to know that you've enjoyed my headcanon posts so much as to continue reading them from time to time, that's seriously one of the highest compliments I've ever received 😭😭😭😭😭 And again, thank you so much for appreciating the fact that I translate my stories so I can share them with you all 🥹🥹🥹 You make me feel so validated!!! 🫂🫂🫂💖💖💖

Also, I have to say I needed to hear that you also love my stories, as I've been feeling a bit insecure about them as of lately. Sometimes I feel like my writing could be much better, as some of my fics end up not getting the feedback that I expected them to 😅 I'm obviously thankful for you and our common friends as you never fail to show me that you love my stories and want to read more of me, and it makes me feel so touched 😭😭😭

But yes, this is something I've been struggling with as of lately, and it's stopped me a bit from trying to write fanfiction again, but I just have so many stories I wanna write! And knowing that you and the others will be there to read them is motivation enough to keep going 🥰🥰🥰 So thank you, dear friend, because you just can't imagine how much your words have helped me 🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂

I'm so happy to know you're feeling better and doing activities that you enjoy! You can always count on all of us to support you, and we were obviously not exaggerating when we said we loved you first for who you are 🥰🥰🥰 I'm also so happy that you have your husband and your son by your side to show you how important and special you are! Just like the rest of us will never stop doing, dear friend 💖💖💖

And of course! May we prosper and continue to love this amazing and wholesome fandom! I love you soooo much, my dear friend! Thank you again for such a beautiful and loving message 🥹🫂💖 My heart feels so warm right now!!! 💖💖💖

#what a lovely surprise! #you're seriously amazing! #we love you soooo much! 💖 #thank you for this! 💖 #asks #asks answered #vulpixfairy1985 #silenzahra

[diorsbrando]

the way i’m slowly and extremely gradually treating my blog like my diary or just like….instagram or something is becoming increasingly concerning to me by the day. i just post and rb a bunch of stuff that i like or supporting other creators on here or screaming about my thoughts (that have so much range by the way). uncontrollable venting under the cut .

TLDR -> i am in my feelings and im feeling sad and wallowing in self loathing things because i want to write so so bad all the time but there are so many other factors discourage me from doing so, like im not good enough because i don’t publish things enough, & not many people read anything i write anyway

<\3

i really am trying not to hate myself because another 2-ish months have passed since the last time i have posted a fic, but it is so so hard not to. SO HARD. mutuals are doing kinktober events left, right and center, other moots post fics and blurbs as easy as sending a 5 sentence text and here i am. envious of them all. rereading and proofreading and staring at the same drafts i have had in my google docs for weeks. months, even!

i just get discouraged coming on here sometimes. it’s not that i don’t have the motivation to write because i do— i really do. i have so so many ideas that i want to share with everyone and my writing style keeps evolving and it makes me want to experiment with different tropes with my favs and see how well i can execute them. but the actual doing it….finding the time and trying to balance is just :( sob. it’s hard.

i internally cringe and silently scold myself at the wips i have and remembering how at the time i created them i was so excited to write them but then never finished for one reason or another. abandoned series make me sad :/ i feel guilt when people talk to me about how much they liked a headcanon i did and how i promised to expand on it, or multichap series i only posted the prologue and first chapter over a year ago. guilt bc i want to write everything but just can’t and i’m still struggling to accept that.

and in the process of struggling with this fact it turns into a self loathing cycle that then turns into disappointment when interactions on my writing pieces are low and have become stagnant, and the pieces are 4+ months old or something, and it’s like will i become irrelevant if i don’t post something soon? i have nothing new to offer at the moment, all the ideas im excited about and i have a feeling people will like im still working on or in the brainstorming phase so im like what do i do? idk. then i just close the app.

don’t even get me started on how admiration at just how good other people write makes me feel awful about my own writing…..

anyway sorry for boring you with my feelings but yeah :,) maybe i should stop being so hard on myself

if u read this far then….wow. thanks for listening 🤍

#ʬʬ.sosa speaks.com #sorry this turned into a serious ugly emotional rant and #i am sorry #sigh #i could have gone into a lot more detail with other things that make me feel bad and discouraged #but maybe another time #anyway. #im gonna watch some anime

[sharkneto]

post the long ass five and allison talk, post it, share it (please and thank you) 🔪

Did you know this wip is at like 9k words? I didn't realize that until I was looking for a chunk to snip, which was also hard because I like it all so much. It's slow writing, though, because it uses so much of my brain to think through these dense conversations and align S3 actions and motivations and what not. One day I'll have it done. One day 😪 But here, have a small section of all of Allison's and Five's words:

“I lost my family!”

“If only there was someone who could understand that!” Five throws right back, seeming to surprise himself with that as he blinks and takes a quick drink, averting his gaze.

Allison sits with that for a second. Because he’s right. For some reason, that’s a piece of Five that they all constantly forget about despite it being so blatant in everything he does. She blames it on his acerbic nature. Still, “So why didn’t you?”

“What?”

“Where were you? I was losing my mind. I thought I was alone, that none of you cared that Claire was gone. Because you did understand, but you weren’t there.”

He studies his drink. The quiet stretches between them. Allison waits, the phantom of that grief and hurt from that time in her chest, aching. Eventually he sighs. “Fifty-eight and I just can never seem to do the right thing.” He gives her a sideways look. “I thought Viktor had it. He said he was handling the situation. Klaus asked if I wanted to go on a road trip with him, secretly to go find his birth mother but I didn’t know that, then. And…” He pauses, his gaze slightly distant. “And I wanted a vacation.”

The hurt pulses. She takes a careful breath around it.

“And then it didn’t matter,” Five finishes. “We found the paradox and then there was the kugelblitz and priorities had to be adjusted.”

“Did you have a nice vacation at least?” she asks, bitter. She had to do everything alone because her brother wanted to go on a road trip.

He nods, missing her sarcasm. “Yeah. Was my first vacation in… well, ever. We saw the world’s biggest ball of twine.”

It’s unexpected enough that it jolts Allison from her anger a little. “The world’s biggest ball of twine?”

He nods again.

“…Was it big?”

“Yeah. Seemed big enough, although my current perspective might be a little biased.” He twitches a hand, indicating his short height, and the corner of his mouth lifts up.

It’s quiet again as they take a moment, lost in their own thoughts. What Five said didn’t actually explain why he wasn’t there, except it does. It’s very simple. Viktor said he was handling her, Klaus asked him directly to do something, and he had come off of two weeks of straight apocalypses. And then once there was a new apocalypse, that was his priority again.

Except it wasn’t, not this time.

Allison sighs. This isn’t getting her anywhere, it’s not helping.

Five glances at her.

She backtracks. “If we had talked, if you hadn’t gone with Klaus and before everything with the kugelblitz, what would you have told me?”

“How do you mean?”

“Like, with… losing Claire. That it gets easier?”

“Oh, no,” he says immediately with a frown. “No, it… it never does.”

When he doesn’t add anything more, she prompts, “That’s it?”

He shrugs. “You figure it out.”

“Would you have helped me figure it out? Helped me get Claire back?”

There’s a hitch before he answers and that tells Allison everything she needs to know. “Really?” she interrupts, incredulous.

He restarts with a grimace, not looking at her again. “It doesn’t matter what I would or wouldn’t have done.”

She scoffs. “Five, of course does.”

“I don’t have the information, Allison! I would have looked, alright? I would have tried, but I can’t tell you that I would have been able to get her back and I thought you’d appreciate the straight answer. I don’t know. I didn’t know that timeline well, I don’t know what I could or couldn’t have done.”

“So you can rip time apart however you want when you lose people, but if the rest of us do, suddenly you can’t?” she demands, ignoring the fact she’s one of the people Five ripped time apart for.

“Yes!” Five snaps, matching her energy and getting defensive. “Yes. Because when I did it, there weren’t any other variables. If I did it wrong, well, everyone was already dead. Claire would have been a very tricky needle to thread. I mess up and we’re in the same spot as the kugelblitz. Or we have Claire but we lost Luther.”

His choice of a hypothetical sibling to have lost is not arbitrary. Allison grits her teeth against it. “So then you try again, Five! Isn’t that the point of time travel?”

“How many times do I have to explain to you all that that’s not how time travel works? Especially mine. I’m not… I wasn’t good at it.”

She refuses to get stuck on the reminder of the fucked up no-powers situation and bowls through it. “You had a briefcase! You could have used that!”

“We needed it to figure out the kugelblitz situation.”

“You had two, what happened to the other?”

“Fried. Trying to get it to work around the kugelblitz.”

“So then you get why I had to do what I had to do to fix things. And I did it for all of us!”

“Because I haven’t been doing things for all of us?”

“You voted against saving the world! You voted that we all die!”

That brings him up short.   

#i cannot believe this post-s3 fic has been sitting on my computer for so long #it just uses so much brain to write T-T #have to hit the right times when i'm turning it all over in my head - and then also that i can get to my computer with that #snip #snips #tua #number five #allison hargreeves

[writingquestionsanswered]

First off, thank you so much for all of your writing advice! You're an invaluable resource when it comes to new writers, and I wanted to thank you for doing what you do!

I am not new to writing, but in the past few months, I've decided to seriously pursue completing my WIPs. I am running into a problem when revisiting my old work, specifically finding motivation to complete them. Most of my WIPs are fully fleshed out with planning docs, outlines, etc., which should make the writing process all that easier. My problem is that once the outline is completed, I am no longer interested in writing the story. I usually try to freestyle my writing, meaning no outline, but I've found that when I freestyle, I often have issues creating a coherent plot. So I've recently turned to creating loose outlines to keep myself on track, but once the outline is finished, I'm no longer interested in the story. I still want to write it, but when I try to use the outline, I find myself getting stuck. Its almost like my brain feels like the story is done and no further development is needed.

So my question is, how do you keep writing once the outline is completed? Is there a way to rekindle the passion for the narratives I've created?

Losing Motivation After Outlining

It does sound like that's what's happening... like after you finish outlining, your brain is saying, "Well, this story is done! Off to the next one!"

I have a lot of ideas for things to try to rekindle your interest in your story. I'll link them all below, and hopefully one will work for you! ♥ Motivational Exercises:

Guide: How to Rekindle Your Motivation to Write Getting Unstuck: Motivation Beyond Mood Boards & Playlists Getting Excited About Your Story Again

Troubleshooting:

5 Reasons You Lost Interest in Your WIP, Plus Fixes!Have Plot, Can’t WriteFeeling Unmotivated with WIPGuide: Dealing with Self-Doubt & Impostor SyndromeWriting and Depression

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

Learn more about WQA

See my ask policies

Visit my Master List of Top Posts

Go to ko-fi.com/wqa to buy me coffee or see my commissions

#writing tips #writing help #writing advice #wqaadvice

[jesuisici33]

fave lines game

rules: share your favourite lines or paragraph you've written from one of your fics, posted or wip. tagged by @spotsandsocks @kitteneddiediaz @wikiangela @hippolotamus @aroeddiediaz @diazsdimples and using this as my seven sentences Sunday and was tagged by @theotherbuckley @liminalmemories21 @bidisasterevankinard @im-overstimulated-and-im-sad @tizniz

From Public Relations, Patrick and David having a literary fight

“I just figured, this might be a good time to get to know you, and also what you think of the story. Of how our characters work together. That sort of thing. I know we won’t get the scripts until the read-through, but we do have the book…” Patrick shrugged. “Um, sort of self explanatory, isn’t it?” David’s features melted into a “no duh” gesture as he slid his omelette from skillet to plate. “During the first book Adam tricks Godrick the entire time into getting Wyndom’s scepter, allowing him to change reality and having everyone think Adam is the crown prince. He’s a trickster.” David cocked his head to the side. “Although, admittedly, a very good redemption arc.” Patrick blinked, his smile growing in astonishment. “Wait, wait, wait. Did you just finish the first book recently? Cause that is not what happens at all.” He interrupted before David could get a word in edgewise. “Adam is being controlled by the ruby necklace he stole from Queen Luna and because Wyndom cursed the necklace to corrupt anyone who will ever steal it, that’s why he changes reality.”  “Is it?” David almost wanted to add an “Oh, honey,” to the end of his sentence. “ If you remember, V. R. Lee introduced Adam constantly being envious of the royal family and their abundant wealth. The motivation was already there, he didn’t need some necklace to ‘corrupt’ him.” He took a bite out of his omelette. Ever since he learned how to fold in cheese, he’s been making omelettes like a champ. Perhaps he should ask Stevie if she can get him a food network show he can host on the side. “Adam is poor! He had to learn to be a thief! What are you not getting?”  “I’m getting everything actually, it’s you who seems to be missing the point.” David put the last bite of his omelette in his mouth, staring at his plate mournfully. Instead he took the second coffee Patrick brought for him and took a sip from that cup.

two more under the cut

yes I know that he's my ex - tarlos - post breakup/pre getting back together

The only greeting he gets is a raised eyebrow and a scoff. TK brushes past him into the loft and looks around, pointedly ignoring all the decoration Carlos worked hard on during his time moving himself in. TK finds the hoodie behind an end table where Carlos must have thrown it when he took it off. “Got it, thanks.” And this - this isn’t how Carlos wants things to end. Things with TK can’t be just random occurrences at work where they pretend to ignore each other or clipped tones of trying to be civil. It can’t be one of them coming over to get a fucking hoodie for two seconds before leaving to go out and have fun somewhere else. As much as TK may put up a tough front of not caring about what happened between them, he knows that’s all bullshit. Carlos only has to get TK to admit it. Before he realizes what he’s doing, Carlos takes hold of TK’s bicep, stopping him from taking another step. “That’s it? That’s all you have to say?” “What else is there to say?” TK’s body inflates. All the posturing he’s put up for Carlos suddenly leaves him without a fight.

and something from a wip that I've been rereading - my demon!buck/angel!Eddie one

Eddie confronts him about it at the gym station. Making sure no prying humans are within earshot. “What’s a demon like you doing here?”

If there is a way to punch him without also hurting Bobby, Buck would. “Helping.”

Eddie purses his lips. Half in concentration on keeping his rep count, half in displeasure at Buck’s answer. “Helping. How does a demon help people? You’re a temptor, right?” At Buck’s sharp nod, Eddie continues. “So am I supposed to expect a lot of arson around here or something?”

“That’s not how that works.”

“Then educate me. How does your power work?”

Technically, Buck can tempt the divine or damned. It takes a lot of effort and a lot of strength. But he’s done it before. And he’s feeling a little petty and vengeful at the thought of an angel being here in Buck’s territory. So he might as well do it. He’ll most likely be drained by the end of it – but it’ll be worth it. 

He peers into Eddie’s mind, into his wants and desires. He sees…a lego set? Some new lego set that just came out. Someone in Eddie’s life really wants it and Eddie is debating on splurging to make this person happy. But money is tight right now so he has to decide between getting the lego set or paying bills… Logically he knows he should pay bills. But this person has been through so much shit already and this lego set would really make him happy. Eddie should just get the lego set. Another month without cable really wouldn’t hurt-

Eddie gasps. “How did you do that?”

Buck feels cold sweat trickle down his face and back. He doesn’t need to look at Eddie to know he’s been tempted. Whoever that person is, they’re getting their lego set. It’s a small temptation, but the fact he’s tempted an angel will feed him for weeks. 

“You wanted to see how my power works. You got your answer.”

[graceshouldwrite]

How to Finish Your 1st Draft (underrated tips!)

instagram: @ grace_should_write

Hey y’all :) Thought I’d revisit this topic because I have been writing later drafts and revision for the last 2 years—the last time I first-drafted was literally in 2020. I started first-drafting again late last year, and am still doing so this year. 

I’m still rediscovering my plotting/plantsing process, and thought that a refresher would help me, too. I hope you find this post somewhat useful (and that these tips aren’t just for delusional people like me)!

∘₊✧────── ☾☼☽ ──────✧₊∘

1. Find your dedication

The dedication is so, SO underrated—many people think of it as just something you slap on after you’re finished the book, but I like to see it as also one more reason why you’re writing it. 

Maybe you wrote a book featuring a found family group of kids from slums because you yourself grew up in those conditions, or you know/sympathize with people who did. Making sure that readers facing a similar situation will feel uplifted when they experience your book could be something that motivates you to finish. 

For example, my working dedication for my current WIP goes something like this:

To anyone who has yearned for more and failed—all the part-idealist, part-pragmatist, ambitious, “average” kids who will “never amount to anything more,” I’m betting on you. Keep burning those dreams for fuel.  Cling onto them whenever you feel like you will become anything but great. Until you stop betting on yourself, it’s not over. 

As someone whose often struggled to fulfil my own visions, despite having a grand plan for my own future, I—like anyone else—have encountered lots of obstacles and learned to survive on my own. We’ve all learned resilience. 

This dedication reminds me who I’m writing for: myself, and anyone else who identifies with it. I hope that my book can inspire readers on the cusp of giving up. I hope this book can provide readers on their sigma male grindset with a thrilling rush that spurs them on even more. 

Whenever I feel unmotivated, this is where I go. And, for the most part, it works! 

(Of course, you can treat your dedication as a “work” of its own. Feel free to keep revising it and editing it until you’re happy with it)

2. Look at fan art

It can’t just be me who looks at fan art and gets inspired by specific poses or scenes and then adds those scenes into my book. Come on. 

Pretty straightforward. Just search up “fan art for _____,” fan art for a specific fandom you’re into, or even “character scene/pose ideas” on Google or Pinterest. 

Personally, I like doing this more than browsing those “book idea” posts that are followed with actual text explaining the idea—looking at art with little to no text can force you to do the work in describing the scene, pose, or character expression. 

These scenes tend to help you be specific, creating memorable scenes for your readers. Examples of inspiration I’ve taken from fanart is: 

A firework kiss scene

“I got your back!” type trope, where two or more characters fight back to back. IN THE RAIN! 

Gunfights! 

One character running away while slinging the other across their shoulder

Characters having fun at a festival while wearing flower garlands 

When you’re writing, this can motivate you to get to X scene faster, or to finish your book faster so readers can see your characters doing X thing. At least, works for me! 

3. Find ONE specific writing buddy 

Yes, the writing community is GREAT. But, it can feel a bit detached if you’re always only sharing progress with your large group of followers, instead of someone who knows your WIP inside out. 

Find one person or a small group of specific people. Tell each other EVERYTHING about your WIPs. This will feel a lot more personal, and specificity can also help you finish your book faster when they tell you to “finish writing this chapter to get to this scene!”, or when they hold you accountable to a group writing goal. 

You can also all form a group chat with daily progress motivation and trackers. Personally, NaNoWriMo forums are great for finding people to just overshare your WIP with and motivate each other. 

This way, you guys could also peer review your works periodically. Having another set of eyes on your draft—even when it’s not finished—could give you lots of ideas and guidance on plot direction, characterization, prose, etc.

4. Braindump while listening to a song / playlist

Write to the vibes. Literally just that. 

Are there any songs/playlists that really resonate with you or your WIP? Just play it, maybe even on loop, and type ANY ideas from prose to dialogue to scene ideas and themes. 

It could literally just look something like this (there is some purposefully bad writing just for this example): 

Listening to: [title of your song or playlist]

A: Never thought I’d see you again. B: I know you missed me. *sneer* (Dialogue snippet)

omg they bump into each other on the street and she spills her beer on him and her best friend senses the chemistry (Scene idea)

rivals to lovers (Trope idea)

SILK DRESS. FANCY CLOTHES. YES. (Character design idea) 

overcoming your greatest fear!!!!! (Theme idea)

It’s that easy. You got this, soldier. 

∘₊✧────── ☾☼☽ ──────✧₊∘

I HOPE THIS HELPED ANYONE!!! Writing this definitely helped me LOL

Let me know if you have any questions through responses, re-blogging, or DMing me at @ grace_should_write on IG.  

Happy writing, and have a great day!

- grace <3

#writers on tumblr #writing #writer #booktok #Novel #writeblr #Wattpad #writerslife #novel writing #Writing tips #writergram #ya fantasy #young adult #YA Books #Character Design #characters #oc #writing a book #fantasy

[steddiecameraroll]

Snippet from my WIP "Maybe You'll Start Slipping Slowly (and Find Me Again)" (I swear I'm so close to finishing this chapter and getting past the angsty bits. I've been digging deep for the motivation.)

“I had to, Steve.”

They are both keeping their voices low.

“But why?” Steve finally turns to look at the side of Eddie’s face, searching for answers along the edges of his features.

“I can’t believe we’re having this conversation right now.” Eddie slowly turns to look Steve in the eye, then takes a deep breath as if preparing himself.

Steve feels like he should be pulling on armor.

“I was still in love with you,” he states with zero hesitation. “And do you remember what you asked me? What did you say five minutes before you were supposed to get married? You asked if I thought you were making the right choice.” His face scrunches in pained memories. “I realized in that moment that I’d spent years following you around like a fucking puppy. And you didn’t even notice until it was too late. Because honestly, you were making the right choice. I would never be able to give you the life you want. I couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t look at you like I didn’t want you. I couldn’t watch you keep choosing someone else. I couldn’t stand there while you promised to love someone else for the rest of your life when I knew you were the only person I’ve ever loved and honestly will ever love. So I had to leave, Steve. I’m not going to apologize for that. I shouldn’t have said yes in the first place.”

When he’s done, Eddie relaxes back in his seat, his head and shoulders sagging. He looks like a 10-ton weight evaporated from his shoulders. Steve, on the other hand, feels weighed down. He sits slack-jawed in surprise.

“So now you know,” Eddie whispers.

Steve’s ears are humming, static crackling through his skull. He can hear the drink cart tinkling down the aisle and the racing beat of his heart, but his eyes are unfocused, and he’s so very hot.

Eddie doesn’t say anything further, and Steve can’t think of a reasonable way to respond. The silence spreads between them, and Steve somehow needs to reassure Eddie. Maybe tell him he loves him too, or loved him, past tense, and that they could’ve had the life Steve wanted. All it took was Eddie being there. That’s all he wanted, all he’s ever wanted.

Steve waited for him. When they reconnected, he kept waiting. He’d think maybe the next time they’d hang out, Eddie would apologize, confess, and tell him he wanted to make it up to him. After years of waiting, he couldn’t wait anymore. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Steve’s shaking.

“You didn’t want to know.” Eddie sounds resigned.

“Yes, I did,” Steve says with conviction. “I really, really did.”

He can feel Eddie’s eyes inspecting him but can’t bear to look back. His wedding ring mocks him from his clenched hands in his lap.

“Would it have made a difference?” Eddie rasps.

#this damn fic has been at peak level angst for so long #it's so close to being on the other side #i know i'm in control of this plot but it's been a bitch to me #steddie #steddie fanfic #wip #steddiecameraroll posts #my writing

[sapphicscholar]

10, 12, 21?

thanks for these! Let's see what we've got!

10. What fic made you feel the happiest to work on?

Okay if the question was which am I the happiest *to have written* this would be a different answer (indulgence), but re the actual writing process, I think Two corpses. Everything's fine. has gotta be at the top! It was nice to have something that was largely pretty silly (a murder mystery) where Ava and Deborah were simultaneously trying to work out their own interpersonal issues while also playing their parts in the game and getting totally misread by everyone around them!

12. What fic was the most difficult to write? Did you finish it?

Hmm, Adrift (Hacks historical pirate AU) is up there because it's far from my normal genre (much more action-heavy), required a fair amount of research to be close to historically accurate (which is, for better or worse, one of those things I'm really committed to), and just didn't get a ton of interaction (I know lots of folks don't read AUs, even more don't read historical AUs, and plenty don't read WIPs until they're done, but it was the first time in a while I chose to start posting while I was still writing, in large part because lots of folks were so bummed about the tag being quiet, and it was hard to keep up motivation after that). I wrote and posted 3 chapters, but the combo of all those things definitely bumped it down my priority list - it'll get finished, but all things considered, it'll probably say in the back seat until I've made it through work commitment stuff unfortunately!

21. Share your favorite piece of dialogue

Ooh the one I posted in response to @ensorcei is probably up there, but from the same fic (indulgence) is this back and forth because I just really love the rhythm these two characters sink into when they're at each other's throats (because they so often show their cards and give away just how much they care even at the height of their cruelty!)

Blanche’s scowl deepens. “Your talent got you here. Own your achievements.”

“You think you could have lured me from France?” Judith asks with an incredulous laugh.

“All it took was a tawdry affair with a boring American. It can’t have been that hard.” Blanche finds herself leaning in closer, her voice growing more and more ardent. “He can offer you what? Sex? Stability? I gave you the world. A career. A name for yourself.”

“And I want both!”

“You can’t just have both.” Every inch Blanche has ever taken has been a battle, and there has never been a victory without its concessions.

“No, Blanche. No. You think you can’t have both.” Something twists uncomfortably in Blanche’s gut. “You sit there and act superior telling yourself no again and again and again. But all you’re really doing is hiding. Ceding ground before you can even risk losing it.”

#ask me anything #anon #fic writer asks #hacks hbo #julia hbo

[hannah-heartstrings]

WIP Wednesday x3

(I'm aware it isn't Wednesday)

Tagged by my taglist: @inkysqueed @babyblueetbaemonster @druidx ...who I tag all back!

Three tags mean three WIPs. From different things I was working on before depression sucked away all my motivation. I'll get through it.

But these tag games are helpful for when you just can't finish something, so:

We Met in Jail

            Lecrinn stumbled as she was shoved into the jail cell, catching her balance leaned over. Straightening, she paused at the three others in the cell.             An imperial man stood in the middle, an altmer woman looked annoyed off to the side, and a red argonian brooded against the back wall.             Her eyes narrowed, confused. “Wha-?”             The imperial held up a finger.             “Oh, a redguard!” came a taunting voice behind her, making her look even more confused. “How do you like your cell, huh? Roomy enough for you? I can’t even imagine what it’s like for you. No more sun-”             “What are you talking about?” the imperial yelled passed Lecrinn. “Your cell looks the same!” He looked at her. “Sorry, I was just curious what he’d say.” He stepped closer, giving her a big grin. “I’m Rann!” Turning back slightly, he waved a hand from the altmer to the argonian, “That’s Praelyn and Reptilious.” He turned forward, holding the hand out to her. “Welcome to the group.”             “What group?”             “We’re cellmates now!”             Praelyn shook her head.             “Ah, well we might’ve been if I was staying but,” with a smirk she pulled a lockpick from her mouth, “I’m not.” Turning to the door, she glanced down the hall before inserting the pick. Click, click, click.             Reptilious straightened, looking surprised. “Are you breaking out? But that’s illegal!”             “And you’re in here why?”             He looked away, grumpy.

This one really needs to be edited. For one, I find it awkward that Valen Dreth just disappears from the scene. I don't think he's going to just shut up that quickly, but I also don't want it to drag on too much so I'm still figuring it out. (And that is part of his in game dialogue for redguards, it doesn't make much sense.)

But I wanted to share it anyway, mostly for the last part. XD

View from Lucien's Roof

(Probably a working title. XD)

            “Wow,” Garrus breathed out.             They sat atop a ruined tower, the forest stretched out below them basked in a soft golden haze. The sun rested above the blue silhouette of mountains on the horizon.             Looking at Garrus, Lecrinn tilted her head to see his face better, smiling when she saw that he was. His hair shined red in the sunlight, she hadn’t noticed its red tint before. As he started to turn to her she quickly looked forward.             His gaze lingered on her face a moment, on the way the light seemed to make her light brown skin glow. “Thank you,” he looked ahead.             She looked to him from the corner of her eye.             “Moments like these remind me that the world is much more than just pain, there’s also beauty and goodness,” face calm, his voice grew resolute, “that’s why I have to keep protecting it.”             Her smile and gaze sunk. That’s why she had to save it.

The World's Cold but You're Warm

Slightly earlier version to not spoil the (almost) finished one.

            They watched the fire, its hues of orange and yellow swaying against the dark.             With nothing being said, Lecrinn fell into unease, mind wandering to why they were out here in the first place. “Course,” she pushed a smile, “after the Oblivion gate this weather will be refreshing, I’ll actually like it then.”             The wind began to pick back up.             “I said then,” she turned to snap at it, “not now, leave me alone!”             Garrus looked to her with a laughing smile, it quickly fading to sadness. His voice was low. “Despite everything you always find a way to stay hopeful.”             Turning to him, her brows rose.                                               “How do you always keep going despite how cold and cruel the world is to you?”             “It’s not just cold and cruel.” Her voice softened, “there are plenty of warm and kind things to keep on for.” She smirked at him to throw a hint he didn’t catch.

#oblivion fanfiction #oblivion #the elder scrolls #tes #hero of kvatch #tes oc #tes ocs #fanfiction #writing #my writing #lecrinn #rann #praelyn #reptilious #garrus darelliun #thiefguard #oblivion crisis found family road trip #wip #wip wednesday #tag game

[suspiciouslackofclowns]

Have another snippet from my wip Billycule fic that I’ll hopefully be uploading soon on ao3

Yk, if I find the motivation to hurry up and finish mocking up the plot

-

“Look“,” Billy says, and sighs. Stares down at the clipboard in his hands without bothering to try and read the words anymore. “If you really wanna do me a solid, maybe you can come help me in my garage sometime. I have a project that’s pretty slow-moving right now, and–”

“It’s the Camaro, right?” Eddie interrupts.

There’s new excitement on his face, and Billy raises his eyebrows.

“Not the one I had, no. She, uh… got scrapped.”

Eddie nods.

“It’s the ‘68 Z28, right? Your old one was seventies.” The brunet chuckles when Billy narrows his eyes at him in confusion. “Red told me. I promise I’m not that obsessed with you, I just think about you in the bath sometimes and that’s it, I swear.”

Satisfied and probably downright pleased with himself, Eddie brings one of his hands up to tug a lock of hair in front of his face. Billy tries to look offended but his cackle echoes off of the cinderblock walls anyway.

“So she does listen to me when I talk,” he muses.

Eddie drops his arms to his sides.

“Really? The bathtub joke didn’t land? I thought for sure it’d make you blush.”

Billy laughs again, and Eddie’s face burns red as this lopsided smile creeps onto his face.

“I’m not entirely convinced that you bathe, Munson.”

“What?” Eddie gasps. “I bathe. Smell me, I can prove it.”

“I can smell you from here.”

There’s a moment of stillness, like an unspoken challenge is being accepted, before Eddie lifts an arm into the air. Billy barely dodges out of his way when he strides back into his space, shouting, “smell! Smell right now!”

Billy gags when he gets a face full of pit, and Eddie makes a noise of offense.

“I fucking showered this morning, you asshole!”

“With what, hotdog water?”

Tools clutter to the floor when they bump into the workbench, Billy’s lungs sufficiently deflated from laughter while Eddie backs up to check for himself. Billy loses it even more when he grimaces.

“Guess I need to wash my jumper,” he says. Then promptly crosses his arms. “I do shower, though. With soap.”

“Just soap, huh?”

“No, and the water isn’t of the hotdog variety, either.”

Billy composes himself, leaning his back against the table, and can’t help that a fond smile forms on his lips while he watches Eddie pout. Jokes aside, Eddie’s musk doesn’t smell… bad. Hell, sometimes Billy catches himself freezing in his tracks after the guy walks past him just because it carries lightly on the air wherever he goes.

“I’d have to see it to believe it,” Billy says.

The expression wipes clean off of Eddie’s face, replaced by confusion. Just briefly.

“You sayin’ you wanna watch me shower?”

Billy pushes off of the table and smirks as he looks back at his previously forgotten clipboard, flipping through the pages as he strolls over to the car that they’re supposed to be working on.

“I mean, you’re already thinkin’ about me in there, right? Just food for thought.” He doesn’t have to look to know that Eddie just died and came back to himself. And then died again. “You better clock in before Sam catches you slacking, Munson.”

Eddie’s movements stutter as he strides over to the timeclock, head ducked.

Now it’s Billy’s turn to be pleased with himself.

-

It’s a bit of a task to write, but it’s gonna have Harringrove, Mungrove, Tomgrove, Argilly, and Byergrove

Plus other side ships like Stommy and Jargyle, etc

I’m like six chapters in, just gotta work up the nerve to start posting smh

#billy hargrove #eddie munson #mungrove #again this is gonna be a polyfic #billycule #he just deserves all of the boyfriends #and who am I to deny him that? #fic wip #my writing

[the-lonelybarricade]

how is your creative process while writing? and specially how do you deal with having started more than one multi chapter fic? I never really wrote a whole fic but a was trying to for feysand week, but I ended up not having time

I can’t say if the problem is that it’s a multi chapter fic and I end up not knowing where to go and what to focus on first. And there’s always another ideia for other chapter or fic that’s usually impractical.

I think anxiety is a big problem to, knowing there’s something I should finish but can’t even focus enough on what I have at the moment.

I feel this anon, I was also trying to write a whole fic for Fyesand week and ended up not having time 😂 I did the same for Elucien week, too, which is why I'm now a purveyor of so many WIPs at the moment

When it comes to juggling them, I think I update mostly based off of: 1) which piece has gone without an update the longest and 2) which piece I'm feeling the most motivated to work on. Sometimes it's kind of nice to be able to jump between stories to be able to work on whichever one is scratching my brain the most. I always lean into whatever I'm feeling most inspired about so that I'm working with my brain instead of against it.

As far as getting stuck, I find I always struggle with multichapter fics if I don't know where I'm going with them. I write my fics chronologically, but I always start knowing the ending or the general trajectory the fic will take. Sometimes I outline fics before I start, which is always helpful even though I almost always divert from the outline.

So if it were me, and I was struggling with not knowing where to go next or what to focus on with a fic, I would start by creating an outline of the story (or even just the chapter itself). How does it end? What are your characters working towards? How does the story change them? I think those things will help guide you, though obviously you still have to actually write the chapters which is the hardest part.

I've found recently that when I'm really stuck, it helps to start with writing just the dialogue for the chapter. I don't use dialogue tags or any descriptors, I just write line by line how the dialogue will flow and once that's done, I go back and add in all the rest. I find that usually about 1k worth of dialogue can generally end up being about 4k-ish words once I've gone back and added all the rest.

#Also #I have no idea what I'm doing #Like all of this is just guesswork on my part #I have a degree in mathematics - this is definitely not a craft I've had a formal education in #I'm just here because i like putting characters in situations #So please take all of my advice with a grain of salt! #This is just what works for me personally when I'm running out of steam

[angelselene]

Your WIP list is mega impressive!!! But you are such an impressive writer so I suppose it fits <3

But it's me, so I have to ask about the ItaSasu projects I see on there 👀

I don't recommend letting your WIP list get this out of hand. 😂 There are a few fics on it I should probably just admit to myself that I'm not going to finish and jettison, but I am stubborn.

All right--Dead Dove below the cut. We're pretty much hitting all of the Ao3 Archive Warnings with this one.

For the ItaSasu fic - This is one utilizing one of my Favorite Excuses To Knock Sasuke Up™️--making the Sharingan a matrilineal gene. Itachi remains evil and unhinged, and his motivation for killing the clan was "weakness in the bloodline." He's going to use Sasuke to "repopulate" the clan with a "purer" line. It involves captivity, noncon body mod, forced pregnancy and birth, and induced heats (no, not a/b/o, just a way to ensure Sasuke's fecundity). Oh, and noncon, obviously. To say Sasuke does not consent is a gross understatement.

This first fic will cover the actual body modification as well as several rounds of pregnancies and birth. The "Post ItaSasu" fic will be NaruSasu and what happens after Naruto finds and frees Sasuke, but they still have to deal with the fallout of all the jutsu and body modification Itachi has placed on Sasuke, which means that having sex and getting pregnant aren't optional.

First I already have almost 10k written of, and the next scene to write is the first time Sasuke gives birth.

🖊️🖊️🖊️Snippet/Teaser

Pain is the first thing that registers when Sasuke wakes up. He thought he was familiar with pain, but this is different, a deep cramp coming from low in his abdomen. He wants to curl up around it but can’t. The fact that his legs and arms are chained to the ground is something Sasuke should have noticed sooner, but the pain.  Sasuke yanks on the chains, fully expecting them to snap like twigs beneath the chakra-powered pull, only to be stunned when he feels… weak. The shock is so intense that it actually distracts him for a heartbeat.  He is weak.  It’s like he has no access to his chakra at all. Sasuke tries to call it up, tries to force it out, forms seals in his mind, tries to summon chidori, but he feels hollowed out, at the end of chakra exhaustion, only without the physical exhaustion usually associated with it. There’s just nothing there.  The cramps in his abdomen grow in strength, forcing him to pay attention to them again, and he fights against the chains, knowing he’s going to bruise himself and not caring. Let him be bruised—the dull throb of a bruise isn’t even an inconvenience compared to the pain in his gut that feels like something is trying to eat him from the inside.  He doesn’t realize he’s been yelling in his pain until a familiar face appears in his vision.  “Hush, little brother,” Itachi says, brushing some of Sasuke’s sweat-soaked bangs from his forehead. “There’s nothing to fear. The jutsu is just doing what it’s designed to.”

Hope you're not sorry you asked? 😅

#wip game #ask game #ask answered #kimerawrote #dead dove do not eat

[sercezgazety]

2, 9, 11, 16, 20 from this ask game

2. Is there any specific ritual you go through while/before/after your writing?

Honestly, no. There were some cases when I sat down and was able to write an entire fic in one night instead of sleeping just because it was from Lilith's point of view. And there were cases when I struggled with fics for months (just because they weren't from Lilith's pov, let's be honest). I write on the train, before giving a lecture, instead of working, or as a treat because I’m finished with my tasks. Two chapters of The Deal were written on my phone, and so was one chapter of Inhale, Hold, Exhale, because I was restless in a waiting room at a doctor’s. Eda’s entire testimony before the court in A Potter’s Field? Written on the phone during an awkward Christmas eve at the workplace and on my way back. But some other stories were written solely on the laptop during a deserved day off.

I guess there are two constants: 1. I start with collecting vocabulary and useful phrases that have the right vibe, I list them, and then I build the sentences and events around them (yeah, seriously); 2. when I’m near the finish line, I refuse to eat, sleep and whatnot until I reach the end of the story. That’s most often the moment when I finally know how the story’s supposed to end. Only after the last sentence, I fall asleep, sometimes still fully clothed.

Then comes the editing, though, which means the story usually gets twice as long in the process. But the frame, the, uh, skeleton is already there, so it’s much easier.

9. Do you ever have plans to write anything other than fic?

Papers. I have so many freaking papers to write and publish. I’m supposed to be writing one right now.

Back when I was younger, I actually believed I could be able to write a fantasy novel (then it turned into an SF one). I can’t, though. I don’t have enough ideas of my own. What I can do is deconstruct and play with the ideas of others.

11. Weirdest thing you’ve ever written/thought about writing/etc.?

Erm. Back when I was 14 and used to dwell in the cellars of FFN, there was this Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends fic of mine. In which Frankie was so fed up with Mr. Herriman, she murdered him with a chopper. Then, she served him for dinner. Yeah.

idk, man. I was going through a phase (she said, still going through the same phase)

16. Do you have structured ideas of how your story is supposed to go, or make it up as you write?

As per my answer to question #2, I have no idea what I’m doing. There are some very rare occasions when I know how I want the story to end (once again, The Deal), but then I have no idea how to reach that ending, so I work backwards. But mostly, I have snippets of dialogue, a word I want to use, a problem I want to make worse, and I build around that.

I know what’s going to happen in the next paragraph, but not the one after that. That’s why I never publish multi-chapter fics before having finished writing the fic's entirety. I might get stuck in the middle of nowhere (this happened with some of my Star Trek wips), I might change the character’s motivation by the end of the story, and then add or delete some scenes in the beginning. I might need to completely re-arrange the material. I don’t know how people who publish chapters while not having the entire work as a context do it  (I mean, they do it very well, it’s just something that sounds too difficult for me).

20. 4 sentences from your work that you’re proud of

[context: Philip opens Caleb’s coffin and sees the worms inside]

These things might have their purpose, but Philip doesn’t enjoy watching them crawl. Frankly, it’s quite disgusting, and even looking at them squirm makes him gag at times. There’s just something naturally repulsive about them being blind, trying to find their way in the ground by touch, wriggling and making little nauseating movements that cause the soil to collapse and bog. These parasites are equally horrid when they crawl out, finally ripe, or when they cower in the middle of the throne room, trying to repent not because their conscience tells them it’s necessary but solely because they’re frightened of the punishment they justly deserve.

[that’s from The Emperor’s Two Bodies; I don’t rememeber any other fic giving that much of a hard time]

#ask game #the owl house #toh #fanfic

[sorikkung]

what goes on in neverland. ⇝ ch. 3: conversations, conversations, camboys?

word count: 9.8k

pairings: transmasc!reader x Everyone, everyone x everyone (its literally too convoluted for me to try type them out here anymore just see the masterlist for full pairings LOL)

genre: fluff, smut and lots of assorted shenanigans. hijinks, if you will

au: battle of the bands!au but make it gay and horny

warnings: adults talking abt their feelings, mutual masturbation, camming, bondage, remote controlled toys, edging, ruined orgasms, boys crying, cum swallowing but its realistic

a/n: the jump between me taking half a year to update to months to two within the same months??? progress is real guys. anyway we're finally delving into another pov this chapter how exciting!! a lot goin on, a lot of set up here i hope you guys are as excited as i am for what it leads to 🤭

please reblog and leave feedback if you enjoyed, it’s what keeps us writers going :’) (for every comment i get i open up a wip and write a few sentences. thats not bribery but literally just how motivating it is.)

tags: @honeybyunnies @syunderful @absentcaryatid @mingirn (lmk if you want to be added/removed!)

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>you: i got some mad fucking tea to spill are you ready

>mingi’s bitch: omg bet come over

>you: aight @energeric where r u

>you: ???

Figuring you’d just meet him at the couple’s apartment, you slip some shoes on and grab your keys from the hooks in your doorway to leave, only to find the very man you were pinging grabbing his to do the same.

“Oh, did you see the texts then?” you ask, figuring he’d be going too, but then it strikes you that he probably would’ve started pestering you for details already before you even made it to their apartment.

“No, I’m– I’m heading out. Gonna hit the gym with a buddy.” He pauses mid-way through slipping on his shoes and tying the laces to look up at you. “What happened? Dude, your cheek is bruising, are you becoming the same kinda painslut as Wooyoung is or did you get into a fight?”

“Got clocked in the face by Changbin at the food court with Wooyo today, but it’s what his boyfriend texted me afterward that I’m gonna go discuss with him– you should come, the tea is piping hot.”

He shakes his head, hastily finishing tying off his laces and getting up. “Nah, I don’t wanna leave my friend waiting, he’s already there. If you can’t brief it in a maximum of maybe four and a half sentences, it’s gotta wait.”

You snort. “What the fuck is half a sentence meant to look like?”

“And you just used one. Three and a half, go.”

“Changbin’s boyfriend is hot and Felix is still definitely in love with you.”

For a moment, Eric doesn’t say anything at all. He just stares at you, unblinking, and you expect his eyes to widen or his brows to raise or show any inkling of surprise after a few seconds, but he doesn’t. For once you can’t read the dark clouds in his eyes, though you know he’s definitely having some sort of emotional reaction to the news, but he simply turns to grab his keys as if you didn’t say a thing.

“Cool.”

“Cool?” It stumps you, how normal he’s acting when you’re positive he’s feeling anything but. He’s a man who wears his heart on his sleeve and doesn’t hide how he feels, so the way he’s been acting in regards to Felix raises a few questions. Granted, you didn’t expect him to go running back to him – or maybe you did, just partially – but you certainly expected more than that. “That’s it? I thought you still liked him.”

He sighs deeply through his mouth and twirls his keys around his finger idly while standing in the doorway. “Why would I? Yes, I still like him. Maybe a part of me always will. But he’s the one who broke up with me because he didn’t have time for me. Now I see where that time went, and frankly, I don’t think I have time for him either. I too would rather focus on the people I care about. I don’t care if he still loves me. If he really, truly did, as much as I loved him? He’d do a better job at showing it.”

“That’s… fair,” you sound out slowly, nodding. It makes perfect sense, and in hindsight if he’d jumped at the opportunity first you might have even warned him for being too hasty for that very reason. “Don’t worry, he’ll see what he’s missing. We’ll wipe the floor with him and all of his friends.”

Eric gives you a nod and a half smile that doesn’t reach his eyes, then bids you goodbye and heads off. How abrupt, you think. You’ll probably come back to that one later.

There are many benefits to dating Jung Wooyoung, Mingi finds. One of them is that it can never really get boring. Everything about Wooyoung is exciting, and he tries to share that with Mingi as much as possible, whether that be spicing up what they try out in the bedroom or taking him on all sorts of wild adventures for dates, or just always having something going on exciting enough to talk about even on their lazy days.

Today is no exception; he sits on their couch in just his sweatpants, while Wooyoung lies draped across his lap in only his t-shirt. Not his own, but Mingi’s, naturally, and he’s already accepted he won’t get it back until it stops smelling like him. When today’s excitement – you, of course – strolls in and gives them a knowing look, he shakes his head before even greeting you.

“We weren’t fucking this time. Though if you took any longer we might’ve!”

It certainly wouldn’t be the first time you’ve walked in on them in more provocative positions, if that were the case – most times these days, they don’t bother to stop at the interruption, and more often than not you’re quick to join in on the fun anyway. It’s not unheard of, however, for you – or any of the other band members, for that matter – to pass on joining in and merely scroll on their phone or read a book or snack while in the very same room as the deed is being done, but nobody really minds. It’s just a thing that happens, at this point, just as normal as eating or playing video games. You all prefer it that way.

Hell, Mingi is a huge fan of the concept. It didn’t take Wooyoung very long to figure out how much he enjoys showing off, so as soon as his days of being a little shyer and more self-conscious fell behind him in favour of his newfound confidence in his sex appeal and comfort with the band, he became quite the tease when he has an audience. Perhaps that’s why he was all too keen to let Wooyoung drag him down the corridor Changbin went down at the battle of the bands and start making out with him on the spot, knowing – no, even better, hoping – the other man would be watching.

“Without me? How cruel.” You’re quick to join them on the couch, cuddling into Mingi’s side and allowing Wooyoung to sprawl across your lap as well. They both silently appreciate how you fit so easily into their lives as to not even need so much as a greeting when you arrive at their apartment. It’s your home as much as theirs, probably helped by how the whole band lives in the same apartment complex, albeit different floors. At this point, you might as well all be roommates. “Though I suppose I’ll be the crueller one, considering I’m gonna be having a threesome with Changbin and his hot boyfriend and you’re not invited.”

“What?!” Wooyoung jolts up off your laps, staring at you like you just grew a second head. “Why the fuck not? After I sucked the soul out of him that one time? Damn, he has no idea what he’s missing, I’ve only gotten better since.”

“Actually, he kinda does,” you chuckle, taking his place across his and Mingi’s laps so you can cheerily grin up at him and poke your tongue out. “Little birdy told me it was, to this day, the best head he’s ever had. Not that he’d ever admit it.”

“Wait a second, who was the little birdy? Changbin or Minho?” Mingi asks, idly tapping his fingers on your back while the gears turn in his head. Truly, excitement follows Wooyoung wherever he goes — he doesn’t even need to try.

“Minho. We’re Instagram mutuals now, apparently. He had soooo much juicy tea for me. Like how the reason Changbin is gonna deny all your advances is because he’s been in love with you since high school but doesn’t wanna admit it, even to himself.”

Wooyoung freezes, and Mingi freezes at Wooyoung freezing. Mingi doesn’t know the full details of Wooyoung and Changbin’s history beyond being best friends in high school with another friend who went back to Korea — Yeonjun, Mingi thinks his name was — and that the three of them helped each other experiment and realise that they all liked boys. It sounded very casual, and Mingi figured that makes sense; Wooyoung was one of the key players in opening the band up with each other more physically, and, by extension, his relationship with Mingi. Wooyoung is just the kinda guy who likes being physically and sexually affectionate with his friends, and that didn’t bother him. Not when he enjoyed it almost just as much. In many ways, Wooyoung was the reason Mingi could come so far outside his shell. He’d forever be grateful to him for that.

It takes Wooyoung a good, long moment to remember to breathe again before he bursts out laughing, loud and wide and unfiltered in all the ways Mingi just can’t help but fall for. He isn’t sure what is so inherently hilarious about Changbin’s feelings for him, but he doesn’t realise he’s grinning goofily until you give him a very particular smirk that he’s awfully familiar with. The ‘You’re so damn whipped it’s written all over your face’ smirk. But who in their right mind can blame him? At least, that’s what he thinks to himself while his lover takes a moment to recover.

“No way,” he says at last, “Changbin? In love with me after all these years? Oh, that’s rich. You don’t think- you don’t think that’s the real reason they joined the battle of the bands, is it? To see me again?”

“You and your massive ego,” Mingi huffs, nudging him in the shoulder. “I mean, possibly? I feel like it’s more likely that they’re tryna suck JYP’s dick. But that and Felix possibly holding some resentment for Eric and doing it out of spite might be part of it too.”

“Nah, Felix doesn’t resent Eric,” you inform him, “He’s still in love with him. Did Wooyoung not fill you in? That’s why Changbin was all like, ‘just because Felix still likes Eric doesn’t mean you can use him like that!’ It’s kinda the whole reason I got clocked in the face, which was lucky for your boyfriend’s pretty face because if I wasn’t there, it would’ve been him.”

“He didn’t really fill me in, no,” Mingi pouts, shouldering him again, but Wooyoung only scoffs and shoulders him back. “He was too busy telling me all about how hot Changbin was in a fitted t-shirt and how you went flying across a table to really elaborate on the why. Also how hot that Minho guy is and how he seemed down for the double date, so I’m wondering why all of a sudden we’re not invited to the gangbang!”

“Pfft. It’s- Just read the texts.” You unlock your phone and shove it in his hands to save yourself more explaining. Wooyoung snatches it from you before Mingi can grab it, so he simply leans over his shoulder to read without further complaint.

>lino.ooo: i wish he’d understand that being attracted to other people doesn’t mean i love him any less

>lino.ooo: but him accepting that would mean accepting he has feelings for people who aren’t me either 🤭

Mingi reads this and his first instinct is to look at Wooyoung’s face. Wooyoung, eyes adorably wide and almost trying to shove his face into the screen with how invested into these texts he is. The puzzle starts to piece itself together in Mingi’s brain, sneaking suspicions he hasn’t accepted enough to address yet, but he can’t help but feel for Minho’s situation.

>lino.ooo: but i’ve been dating him for a couple years now, and i’ve been his friend even longer, i know the signs. i know what he looks like when hes in love with someone, because he’s like that with me, too

That makes him look at Wooyoung once again, analysing every detail on his stupidly perfect face, and that’s when it really clicks. Mingi feels for Minho because it’s too easy for him to imagine himself in similar shoes – possibly because he’s already standing in them. And possibly has been for a long time now.

He thinks back to how their open relationship all started; how you and Sunwoo had been best friends with benefits since your last year of high school before you dropped out and ran away without him, anyway, and Eric since not long after, jokingly justifying your relationship with there being ‘nothing wrong with kissing the homies goodnight.’ It was an inside joke at first, one followed by obnoxious PDA between your trio or Mingi and Wooyoung calling themselves ‘totally platonic homies’ despite having been dating for a while, but somewhere down the line you had all started actually giving each other goodnight kisses.

He thinks about San, who used to blush such a pretty pink at the gesture, and how he couldn’t help himself turning a chaste peck on the lips to a kiss that lingered, hands that wandered – next thing he knows, Wooyoung is running to him saying he fucked up, genuine fear in his eyes, quick to confess how his goodnight kiss with San escalated to making out against a wall and how it all happened so fast and he stopped it as soon as she realised he was enjoying it too much for a goodnight kiss and ran to Mingi first thing to come clean. He had apologised so vehemently that day, like he was really, truly scared he would lose his lover for such a careless mistake; Mingi then wonders how much of that fear lies beyond the simple kiss.

How much of it was the feelings San made him feel that scared him so.

He decides to keep these thoughts to himself for the time being. After all, maybe he’s simply overthinking again, comparing himself to the other rapper now that he’s come and changed up the scene. Wooyoung has a type, it seems. Thick lips, broad shoulders, reckless confidence, and spits fire on the mic. He wonders how long it’ll be before he inevitably falls for Sunwoo, too. He fits the type to a T. Maybe he already has, actually, he isn’t too sure – but he’s far surer that the way he looks at you, San and Changbin, isn’t the way people usually look at their platonic friends. Or their former friends who they haven’t seen in years and desperately want to get in the pants of and show off to.

Mingi remains quiet.

“Well, I think our next plan of attack is rather obvious,” Wooyoung hums, barely concealing his excitement. However, neither you nor Mingi seem to follow, so you wait for him to realise and elaborate. “Like… if he doesn’t even realise he’s in love with me, we gotta make sure he does.”

“What is that even supposed to mean?” Mingi ponders aloud, raising an inquisitive eye at Wooyoung. He stares back at him.

“Exactly what it sounds like? We need to make Changbin realise he’s in love with me whether he likes it or not. Like, he’s in love with me, that’s so exciting? This whole time? I was literally his gay awakening, I gotta remind him how he got to this point in the first place.” Wooyoung states it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, but Mingi simply blinks, then cuts you off before you can say anything.

“Why?”

That renders both of you silent, and it’s only then when Wooyoung and you seem to finally notice the seriousness of Mingi’s expression, the atmosphere sobering up so quickly it gives him whiplash.

“B-Because… come on, it’ll be fun! What’re you looking so serious for, I'm not the one in love with him! I think I just get a sick sense of satisfaction from it. Plus, he’s hot, you’ve already agreed with me that much, do you not want to make him squirm a little?”

Mingi only frowns harder. It’s true, they already discussed bringing Changbin and even Minho into the bedroom if the opportunity presented itself, but this wasn’t quite the opportunity he was thinking about. If Wooyoung sleeps with someone who he knows likes him like that, wouldn’t that be more than just a casual fling? Why would he want to engage when he knows feelings are involved already? Mingi thinks he knows the answer.

It begs the question, considering when it was brought up they never defined what ‘messing with’ other people implied. Mingi figured they were on the same page in it meaning just having sex or touching or kissing, but now he wonders if he missed something. “How far does our ethical non-monogamy go?”

“What are you–“

“Wooyoung, you’re really excited to hear that your old best friend likes you like that… what’s so exciting about it? You have me already.”

“What? I’m not excited, I just–” Wooyoung flounders at the accusation, bumping you out of the way so he can crawl half on top of Mingi, so he sees just how serious he is. Like the physical closeness would bridge the gap slowly forming. “Jagiya, that’s not what this is at all. I haven’t felt like that about Changbin since I was like, seventeen–“

“So you admit you did once have feelings for him, then?”

“Woah, woah! What is with that accusatory tone? Mingi, I’m not going anywhere. I’m yours, only yours.” He grabs both of his boyfriend’s hands in his, clasping them tightly while he looks in his eyes, wavering. It’s almost uncomfortable to watch. “There’s no competition. Whatever feelings I had for him back then are long gone now, it’s really just a sex thing, like we have with the band, that’s all it is! You know you’re the only one for me, you know I wasn’t even interested in settling down before you, that’s how much you mean to me. I’m yours, first and foremost, no one else’s. However else I get my dick wet doesn’t matter, it– it doesn’t change that. What we have is so much more than that.”

It’s definitely uncomfortable for you to watch now, evident in the way you try to awkwardly shuffle away from them. If Wooyoung notices anything off he doesn’t mention it, gazing almost unblinkingly into Mingi’s eyes in hopes it’ll make him feel his sincerity, but the only sincerity Mingi feels in that moment is Wooyoung’s sincerity to himself. Like he’s trying to convince himself of this just as much as him.

He can’t just tell him that, though. Who is he to tell his boyfriend which of his feelings are real or not? Who is he to say he’s deluding himself? That would be borderline gaslighting if he did, but he can’t ignore the signs that are becoming increasingly obvious the longer he stews on them. He speaks in Korean next in hopes that you won’t catch the meaning of his words.

“Your ears go red when you lie, Wooyoung.”

His mouth opens to say something, then shuts, then again, soundlessly appearing almost like a gaping fish. You don’t stay to hear more, quickly and wordlessly grabbing your phone back from where it had fallen to the couch in Wooyoung’s surprise and trying to make as little noise as possible on your way out to not disturb them. Mingi doesn’t blame you; all of a sudden the air in the room feels awfully stuffy and borderline suffocating, but he has to face this head-on, or else Wooyoung will be lightly dancing around the topic until it escalates.

“I’m not lying,” Wooyoung mumbles, his voice small and caught in his throat. “Is that really what you think I’m like?”

“I– Look, Wooyoung, I’m not going to tell you how you do or don’t feel, I just… Minho’s texts felt kind of relatable when he was talking about how he noticed how his boyfriend looks at other men because he knows what his in love look, looks like. I saw the way you look at Changbin and it just… reminded me of that. But I also see the way you look at them, too,” he gestures towards the door where you just made your escape, “and San. Honestly, I can argue for all of the band, but those two in particular, you look at them the exact same way you look at me. And I just… don’t know what I’m supposed to do about that. How I’m supposed to feel about that.”

Wooyoung shakes his head slowly, almost in disbelief. “There’s nothing to feel about. I meant what I said–“

It’s the denial that gets him. Maybe it wouldn’t sting so much if he just came clean and confessed it, admitted to feeling things for other people, and maybe they could talk about it and what it meant for their relationship, but if he can’t realise it himself they won’t get anywhere. And the more he tries to deny it, the more he digs himself into a hole that only highlights Mingi’s very suspicions.

“No you didn’t. Is that really all the band is to you? Just another way to get your dick wet?”

He pauses, settling back down on his legs as the weight of his words finally sink in. “No, I… of course they’re more than that, they’re... I probably shouldn’t’ve said that in front of him, I’ll– I’ll have to apologise to him later.”

Mingi nods. “Yeah, you should. Like, aren’t we constantly going on about how platonic love is just as meaningful as romantic love? Isn’t that why we’re as close with the band as we are? Saying that what we have is so much more than that just because its romantic is so diminishing. That’s how I know you don’t mean it – you don’t believe that, do you? That’s against everything we both believe in.”

“Well, yes, but–“ he gnaws on the inside of his cheek, trying to formulate a response. “I guess I panicked? I just don’t want you thinking after all we’ve been through together that I’m gonna be into Changbin now all of a sudden just because he likes me. As far as romantic love goes, I just want you. I don’t want anything to change that, to change what we have.”

“We don’t have to change anything,” Mingi reminds him calmly, hands smoothing over the smaller man’s thighs in a soothing motion. “I just want you to be honest with me, and honest with yourself. I won’t be mad at you if you like other people because I know you love me, I just… want you to be able to tell me. To trust me.”

Wooyoung nods silently, slowly at first, then frantically. “I-I will. I’m sorry, Mingi.”

“What are you apologising for?”

“I–“ He falls flat. “I don’t know.”

“Then don’t apologise,” Mingi reassures him with the faintest of smiles, cupping his face and pulling him in for a gentle kiss. “Well, maybe do apologise, just not to me. I apologise for putting you on the spot like that.”

Wooyoung chases his lips after the first kiss, hands slipping around the back of his neck and pulling him in, kissing him deeply and sending tingles down Mingi’s spine. They’re both just so handsy, grabbing at whatever they can reach, Wooyoung drawing closer into Mingi’s lap to close the distance between them, so they can hold each other while they kiss like this. Mingi is honestly content to simply kiss him like that for hours on end, but Wooyoung seems to have other plans as their kisses grow hotter and their hands wander further, teeth digging into lips and nails digging into skin.

When he breaks apart, it’s to slip down Mingi’s lap and onto the floor on his knees, spreading Mingi’s legs apart and reaching for the band of his sweatpants. On his knees for him in nothing but his shirt, Mingi knows he’ll never not be affected by such a sight – if it isn’t old by now it probably never will be, and Mingi finds comfort in that. He likes knowing his boyfriend has him wrapped around his pinkie finger, and that he’ll never fail to drive him wild. It’s safe, secure, how his heart beats for him.

“Let me show you exactly how much you mean to me,” Wooyoung murmurs, low and sultry, but it has the opposite of the intended effect. Mingi tenses up, grabbing both of Wooyoung’s wrists on instinct, then pushes them away from him. The flash of distress on Wooyoung’s face doesn’t slide past him, but he doesn’t have it in him to feel too guilty about it.

“Wooyoung,” he breathes out, not letting go of his wrists. “How is this any different? How is having sex with me proving how much I mean to you when you just said all your relationships with other men are just about sex? What kind of message are you giving me with this?”

How Mingi’s heart beats for Wooyoung is safe. He knows that no matter what happens, that will never change – it will always beat for him. That much he is sure of.

Whether Wooyoung is the same, however, he is not.

His mistake seems to crash down on him all at once, and he slips his hands free and back to his sides as he scrambles to his feet in panic. “No, no, I didn’t mean–“

“Just… stop,” Mingi sighs, running a hand through his hair. He’s tired. He doesn’t want to wrestle with – whatever this is that they’re wrestling with – any longer. “I don’t wanna go in circles again, can we just… cuddle?”

Wooyoung is eager to oblige, grabbing a throw blanket off the couch and curling up to Mingi’s side with a quickness he only ever really sees from him on-stage, but he's visibly relieved at the change of topic though guilt still lingers on his features. Mingi turns on the tv; white noise at this point, to leave him alone with his thoughts. Well, not too alone, with Wooyoung in his arms, but he likes it that way. Maybe a small part of him fears that if he lets go, he’ll lose him – but mostly, he just enjoys having him close, even when they’re not the happiest with each other. They’ll get through this.

He leans his head atop the crown of his lover’s, not before pressing a quick kiss to the top. Wooyoung buries his face in his shoulder, returning the kiss to his bare skin, and in that moment, that is all Mingi needs.

That’s enough excitement for one day.

It’s only when you finally get back to your apartment and shut the door behind you do you finally feel like you can breathe again, far away from the stuffiness of the couple’s apartment and the thick tension between them as they fought right in front of you. Not the first time they had done so, and you are usually comfortable enough in their home to just scroll on your phone on their couch until they’re done, but you’re not sure you’ve witnessed a fight quite so personal between them before. Besides, it’s not like you had anything planned for staying longer, so it felt easier to get out of there as soon as you can rather than wait it out as a spectator and hope they’d feel up to sex or video games or going for a cheeky fast-food run in the aftermath.

Sunwoo is sprawled across the couch when you arrive, and he raises his eyebrow at you over his shoulder when he notices the loud exhale at finally arriving home.

“What, did your gossip sesh with Woogi not go so well?” he jokes, but when you plop yourself across his lap, staring up at the ceiling with a humourless chuckle back, he figures he’s probably exactly right.

“Yeah, you could say that.”

“Wanna talk about it?” He turns off his phone and slips it back into his hoodie pocket to give you his full attention, so you sigh.

“So the goss is that Felix is in love with Eric still, which I already told him and he doesn’t wanna do anything about it, which is fine, and then the other part was that Changbin has been pining over Wooyoung since high school. Which is like, a long ass time to be pining over someone you’ve barely seen since, but it’s enough that his boyfriend noticed – oh yeah, I’m leaving out details again. So Changbin ran into me and Wooyoung at the food court and punched me in the face–“

“–he what?! –“

“–yeah full-on sent me falling over a table, it was hot– yeah and then in a last ditch attempt for him to not like, literally knock my lights out in the middle of the plaza, I complimented his muscles and fed his ego enough for him to be too busy preening to deck me, and then his boyfriend came in. Lee Minho, or Lino apparently is his stage name, and he grabbed my ass, put a metaphorical leash on his boyfriend and basically said we had a point and then plugged Stray Kids’ Instagram, to which obviously I had to stalk, and then I followed his account because he has three really cute cats and we started dm-ing and– here I’ll just show you the messages.”

Sunwoo is straight-up laughing by the time you finish your tale, grabbing your phone from you as you pull up the direct messages with the eccentric man. “You know, just because you’re a rapper doesn’t mean you have to exercise that breath control when telling a story, take it from me.”

“This is how I normally talk!” That draws an exasperated giggle from you, and that’s enough to ease some of the tension that was weighing on your shoulders from the argument. “Basically, you’ll see what I’m talking about when you scroll down to it, but basically I told all this to Wooyoung and he was like, ‘If Changbin has feelings for me and doesn’t even notice I gotta make him notice,’ which for obvious reasons made Mingi a little uncomfortable, because why would he care about his crush on him if he’s already happily taken anyway? So he asked how far their ethical non-monogamy is meant to go and Wooyoung got all defensive and basically said that Mingi is his everything and everyone else is just how he gets his dick wet but doesn’t compare to him, and honestly… that one kinda stung a little.”

Sunwoo visibly winces at that, looking away from the messages to make sure you are okay. “Ouch.”

“Yeah.” You huff, sinking further into the couch and mentally hoping it absorbs you completely. “I dunno it was just so… tense for that moment there. Felt like there was a lot to unpack. Mingi seemed to think so, too, because then he just switched to speaking in Korean and I took that as my cue to leave.”

“Do you remember what he said?” Sunwoo offers helpfully; you aren’t fluent in Korean by any means, but being friends with a whole band of Korean speakers and roommates with two of them forces you to pick some basics up over the years. Especially with Sunwoo practically acting as Eric’s personal tutor, as the latter didn’t learn to speak it growing up but was familiar enough with it for it to be easier for him to learn. Similarly, Kevin never learned it at home either, but was a lot better at self-studying than you were and had also been learning for a lot longer – you had only decided to really commit to it after moving in with the boys and hearing how much they would practice at home.

“I recognised the main words, I think. ‘You’, ‘red’, ‘ears’, and ‘lie’. Lying maybe? It doesn’t take a genius to figure out where that was going, though.”

Sunwoo nods, reaching down to play with your hair in a motion you think is supposed to be comforting. It does help. “That’s pretty awkward. How do you feel about it? What are you thinking?”

It’s in times like these when Sunwoo’s maturity shines through; while usually he’s one of the first to goof off and tease or get fired up and in his feelings, in contrast, he can often be very objective with other people’s issues.

“I feel… weird. Like I saw something I probably wasn’t meant to see,” you start with a sigh. It’s hard to place exactly what you’re feeling at first. “It was kind of… disheartening? The way Wooyoung talked about him and Mingi. I don’t know how to explain it, it was just so… uncomfortable. How he kept saying Mingi is basically like, above the rest of us, when I thought we all agreed that romantic relationships shouldn’t be the be-all-or-end-all of human connection because other bonds can be just as strong, but he kept emphasizing how what they have is so special and how he’s Mingi’s and no one else’s, and it’s like… what does that make us? I know he’s not our boyfriend, but I like to think we’re a lot more to him than just friends who get his dick wet.”

Sunwoo mulls it over for a moment, then stills the movements of his hands to give you a steadfast look.

“Do you want us to be more than friends?”

The question kicks your heartbeat into overdrive, suddenly picking up like you’re being chased by an unseen beast that could snuff you out at a moment’s notice. You try not to let that alarm show, but you have the gut feeling that Sunwoo picks up on it, at least on your hesitance to respond, so you open your mouth to say something before it looks like your silence has more meaning to it.

“No– yes? I mean, aren’t we already more than friends, in a way? Friends don’t usually do what we do. Is there not an in between friendship and dating? Since when were we the types to be stuck in singular boxes and labels, huh?”

Sunwoo doesn’t seem to buy it, shifting beneath your weight so you sit up to let him adjust his position and get more comfortable. What you don’t expect, is for him to instead swiftly cage you between him and the couch, towering over you with his eyes boring into yours. He doesn’t touch you, his hands placed firmly on either side of your head, but the proximity makes it feel like his whole weight is pushing down on you.

He says your name unwaveringly. “If friendship is just as strong and important as romance, why do you not want to consider us just as friends?”

Your voice gets caught in your throat. You want to ask why he has to be so, so close to ask you such a question, but the time it takes to gather your wits to reply is probably exactly the reason. You can’t lie to him like this, you can’t bluff or flounder or get anything past him. When he looks into your eyes like this, he sees everything beneath him, and in that moment, you feel more naked before him than you ever have been even without the presence of clothes.

“I… because it feels weird to call you guys my friends. Cause I have other friends, I’ve had close friends with benefits, too, but you guys are just… different. It feels different. You guys aren’t on the same level as people I call my friends,” you explain, hoping that it makes even a lick of sense, but you fear now that you’ve said it out loud it only serves to prove Sunwoo’s point.

Do you want to date them? You’ve been bouncing the idea around in your mind for a few years now, and you still don’t have a clear answer. When you first met San and Kevin, the answer was yes. For Wooyoung and Mingi, it was an ‘if only,’ but they were fresh in their relationship at the time, so you figured they were off-limits. Eric and Sunwoo you had figured any attraction to them was just physical and a result of you messing around with them while also developing a meaningful friendship beyond being an experiment or a booty call, but that didn’t necessarily mean you wanted to date them.

But as the band formed and you all grew closer, they quickly became the most important people in your lives by a long shot, people you’re closer with than you ever have been with anyone else, and that’s uncharted waters. Throwing sexual attraction into the mix only further muddies them, because is it that you’re attracted to them as a person in a romantic sense, or you’re attracted to them and the fact that you’re close to them as people and care for them deeply seem inherently romantic through that lens? Is it possible to be attracted to someone physically and love them platonically? Your logic tells you yes, of course, queerplatonic relationships of all kinds exist, but you’ve gotten to the point where you don’t know the difference anymore. Not when this type of relationship is all you’ve ever known, and you’ve enjoyed them too much to bother trying to pursue anything romantic with anyone. After all, explaining to any possible romantic interest that you don’t plan on stopping sleeping with your entire band and whoever else strikes your fancy, and that you and your band are so incredibly close and live together and spend basically all your spare time together, doesn’t usually score you any second dates.

It's not like that has bothered you much, though, perfectly content with what you have with them – they know you far better than any romantic interests ever have, so why would you bother when you already have almost everything you could ask for in a connection? But that only sounds like you’re already dating them, or at least treating it like you are but dodging the big scary ‘label’ question to not frighten them off and burst your bubble.

“You’re thinking really hard right now,” Sunwoo comments, smirking as he analyses your face. Why is he smirking? What does he think he just won? You can’t read his at all. What you do know is if he doesn’t just close the distance and kiss you already you might just explode, but he’s determined on running his mouth and for once in your life you feel helpless to stop him. He’d see right through your attempts at distraction. “Are you finally putting two and two together? Because what I see, is that Wooyoung talking about Mingi as the only one for him made you uncomfortable because you don’t want Mingi to be the only one for him. You want him to be ours, isn’t that right? You want him to be yours, too.”

You feel like the slightest slip of the tongue will end in instant regret, your last coherent thought fizzling out. “Are you trying to tease me right now, Sunwoo? I’m being serious.”

“So am I.” He moves one hand to pinch your chin between his thumb and index finger, making sure you can’t look away from his steadfast gaze. “Dead serious. Do you want to date us? Be romantic with us, tell us those three words you’ve been too scared to say for too long, take us on dates that are explicitly dates, call us yours? Is that what you want?”

How are you even meant to answer such a question? Do you? Don’t you? What would happen if you said yes? Or no? Your head is swimming – if the energy at Wooyoung and Mingi’s apartment felt suffocating, the tension now felt like walking a tightrope with a blindfold on. One wrong step, one wrong breath and you plummet to your untimely demise, but the tightrope you tread on is merely a thread and may snap at any moment regardless.

He says your name again, calling your attention back to him, awaiting an answer.

You don’t have one for him.

The door swings open so violently it bangs against the wall, San bursting in with a shout and his laptop in hand, screen facing toward you, and the most positively mind-blown expression on his face.

“You guys won’t fucking believe what I just found–! Oh. Uh.” His voice is booming until it’s not, dropping to the lowest of volumes once he sees you and Sunwoo’s position on the couch and the seriousness on your faces. Both you and Sunwoo break that contact to look at him in surprise, his equally surprised face staring right back at you. It’s laughable, even, how San has walked in on far less innocent interactions between you guys before, but it seems that even at a moments notice he can feel the thickness of the tension in the room. “Should I uh. Should I come back later? Am I interrupting something?”

You want to say yes, but it’s not like you had an answer for Sunwoo anyway. You suspect Sunwoo will tell him to leave so he can continue drilling you in private, but instead his attention catches on to whatever’s on San’s laptop. It’s porn, which isn’t very surprising, but Sunwoo cuts off whatever he was about to reply and narrows his eyes.

“Is that… Hyunjin?”

San is thrilled to launch into his story about how he was looking into camming as a potential source of income as he may or may not be about to get fired from the Snack Falcon he worked at after one too many shifts of just clocking on and leaving whenever he felt like it because hardly anyone shows up to that store anyway – “Ham Panther is literally right across the street,” he argued, “And they just sell the same shit, and more shit, for cheaper! Anyone who wants good food would have a better time at like, any other store that actually exists.” – but the final straw may or may not have been him and Eric smashing their old lights in the carpark at the back of the store when he was supposed to be closing.

“Jesus Christ, San,” you wheeze, “I’m honestly surprised it took them this long. Wait, but, wasn’t the reason they hadn’t fired you yet was because you were like, the only other employee they had?”

Sunwoo had given you a long, hard look before removing himself from you and letting San come in and go on about his story, which spoke all the words it needed to say. ‘We’ll come back to this later.’ You’re not sure you want to, but you’re happy indulge in San’s shenanigans for the time being and catch your breath again, even if it’s a struggle to shake off the heaviness of everything all at once so suddenly.

“Yeah, well, I was, but then this new guy joined, I think his name is Jeongin or something? I dunno, but it probably doesn’t matter since if he can take my shifts I’m probably done for. I’m at least gonna see a cut in my shifts, but also, I think the night shift guy is leaving, so there might be hope for me yet.”

“But not for your sleep schedule,” you joke, and San nods solemnly.

“Yup, no hope for that one. But anyway! Either way I was like, this probably won’t bode over well, and I’m hot as fuck so I might as well give a shot at being a camboy on the side? Like, seems easier than being a stripper, since I don’t have to learn how to dance or work a pole, and we have enough sex that I probably wouldn’t need to change much of my routine as much as just like, chucking on a camera every now and then. I could make sure your faces aren’t included in the shot, or I could just go solo. Helps to have an apartment to myself.”

“Keep flexing that on us, why don’t you?” Sunwoo huffs, rolling his eyes. He’s quieter than usual, but not enough for it to look like anything more than just being tired, but he’s no less sassy. “I’m less shocked you still have a job and more shocked that you can still pay for an apartment on your own.”

“Well, it helps that I don’t spend much on food,” San reasons, “Considering Wooyoung cooks enough to feed a small country and gets offended when we don’t eat it, and the rest of you guys don’t mind me raiding the fridge every other night or so.”

You snort. “Who said we don’t mind? You know the rule, if there’s only one left it’s not yours – take the last slice of pizza again and I will fucking end you, Choi San.”

He guiltily covers his hand with his mouth. “Oops! Enough of that though, so long story short I heard this site was pretty safe and pays well so I take a look to see what my competition would be like, and lo and behold… the one and only Stray Kids’ Hwang Hyunjin’s cock, balls and ass, first thing on my laptop screen. Viola!”

Placing himself on the couch next to you two with his laptop on his knees for you to see, he clicks play. You only recognise the man after your thorough Instagram stalking from earlier, but it’s definitely him – he doesn’t cover his face at all, the side of it pressed to the mattress with his ass up in the air, stuffed with a pink toy, hands tied behind his back and hard, leaking cock on full display for the camera, trapped in a cock ring that keeps vibrating around him. You wonder how he’s planning to untie himself after he finishes – or how he tied his own wrists behind his back anyway, and if he did that on camera or before turning it on, because there doesn’t seem to be anyone else with him. He must’ve been live for a while now because he looks on the brink of tears as the buzzing stops, brokenly whining and writhing on the bed.

“Please,” he whimpers, shamelessly shoving his hips down on the mattress where he’s stained it with his pre-cum already in an attempt to get any kind of stimulation while bound, “Please let me come. I’ve been so good for you guys, please, I was so, so close…!”

You can’t deny that the visual – hell, the audio too – is hot. Anyone with eyes, ears and a sexual attraction to men would agree on that much. While you thought you’d probably end up zoning out and overthinking your interactions with your bandmates the whole time, you find yourself instead transfixed with the performer on the screen and his alternative form of performance. Does his band know about this, you wonder? If not, it could be quite the juicy secret to leverage later. Regardless, heat simmers beneath your skin with every one of Hyunjin’s whiny pleas.

The chat is moving so fast you almost can’t keep up with it. But you do notice the sudden influx of donations, and suddenly the buzzing resumes again and Hyunjin’s whole body jolts as he squirms to get back on his knees so the camera can see his dick again. He doesn’t seem like he’s acting or playing much up, eyes glazed over and breathing heavy in between his honey-sweet moans. He’s so unfathomably pretty that even fucked out like this, he looks picturesque.

“Don’t come…? Guys please, please just let me come, haah, I’ll- I’ll put on such a pretty show for you I p-promise!”

San shamelessly adjusts the raging hard-on in his pants as you watch, hand hovering over the tracking pad. “So he’s managed to hook up both a cock ring and a vibrator to the site’s donations, but there’s options both to make it vibrate but also to make it stop, which I’ve never really seen before. It’s like a bidding war between the ones who want to edge him and the ones who want to make him come, which might be hell for him but holy hell is he raking in mad cash that way.”

“That’s actually so smart,” you hum thoughtfully, “Leveraging control freaks’ need for control to make even more money. Guess the orgasm denial enthusiasts are winning tonight, huh?”

“Do you think this is how they afforded all that fancy shit for their stage? Look, that guy just donated a hundred bucks to edge him again. If I can make this much money off camming, I can quit Snack Falcon for good and get like a day’s worth of pay in an hour or two!”

Sunwoo isn’t even paying attention to what he’s saying, fixated on the view on the screen and the sounds of Hyunjin’s whimpering filtering from the speakers. He slips a hand down the waistband of his pants and boxers to stroke himself languidly, wetting his lips. “He’s fucking hot.”

Jerking off to porn together isn’t exactly the most common activity between the renegades, but it’s not unheard of, either, if one of you happen to stumble across something hot enough to be worth sharing. It’s just that most of the time, with so many options readily available, you don’t really need to look for porn when the group chat’s attachments are full of it, and you could create an equally hot or even hotter scenario yourselves.

It’s still normal enough that you all just fall into it naturally without talking about it, San also tugging his cock free to jerk it a lot hastier than Sunwoo, obviously riled up from the moment he entered the apartment, shamelessly letting his head fall back and a groan filter from his lips at the sight. “He’s so fucking hot it’s unfair.”

Unfair to who? You think San is arguably just as breathtaking, but it doesn’t seem like the right time to voice that thought, especially after everything that just happened, so you keep that part to yourself and simply take in the sight of him, jaw clenched and almost fucking into his fist before turning back to the screen.

“Yeah, no kidding. Perfect face, perfect body, I can’t really say I’m surprised people are paying hundreds just to have their way with him,” you mutter in awe, working your fly undone because that visual is enough to make you throb but the sounds just make it maddening. Is that how desperate he usually sounds, or is that just him on camera? You’re itching to find out, already having decided on your next target for your borderline malicious flirting.

To your surprise, Sunwoo slaps your hands away with his free one before you can slip them down your underwear, but before you can protest or ask why he replaces it with his own, quick to rub at your enlarged clit without any of his usual teasing. You’re not sure if he just feels like it, or if it has anything to do with the conversation you were having before San interrupted, but if that is the case you’re not exactly sure what the message he’s trying to give is supposed to be. You don’t oppose to it though, happy to reach over and grab his dick instead, but he doesn’t let you do that either, clearly insistent on you not doing any of the work and him getting both of you off. You’re almost shocked that San doesn’t complain at being left out, but he’s not even looking at you two, just at Hyunjin’s trembling form on his laptop.

“O-Oh fuck, my love– my loves, I’m close, please, please let me come, d-don’t you think I deserve it? Ha-ah… please…!”

He desperately glances somewhere beyond the camera, and that answers your question from earlier; someone lucky is in the room with him – you wonder who, whether it’s a partner, a bandmate, or some else, but the thought doesn’t occupy you for long as much as the thought of him liking an audience even without a camera – watching as Hyunjin’s mouth falls open in a silent plea; please. He must be truly at his limit if he’s asking someone to interfere with his viewer’s wishes just for the sake of his orgasm, but the beautiful distress on his face tells you that whoever is on the other side of the camera isn’t budging. You like seeing him a mess like this, rather than the pretty and powerful man you saw on stage and talking to Felix at the Prism, and knowing that he’s your competition has you hoping they prolong his suffering just a bit longer; the thought of seeing him break and cry along with the feeling of Sunwoo’s skilled fingers between your legs has you almost dizzy.

“San, make him turn it off.”

“Wait, what?” San finally looks at you, hands balled into fists by your side as Sunwoo continues working his magic. “Like, turn off the stream or–“

“No, donate like twenty bucks to turn it off, I’ll pay you back later– I just hope no one pays higher to keep it on…”

“You’re cruel,” San scoffs, but he’s grinning just as sadistically as you as he sets up the donation to turn off the cock ring and the vibrator at the same time, and to your luck, as soon as the donation goes through, Hyunjin’s body goes limp as both toys immediately turn off.

“No, no, no, please let me come!” Hyunjin borderline screams, voice cracking under the strain as tears stain his pretty cheeks. His hips twitch in search of the stimulation he just lost, but within seconds he’s spurting cum all over his stomach and the sheets beneath him completely untouched, gasping and thrashing around on the bed. “No, fuck, no, please…”

He sobs into the sheets, the muscles in his arms bulging with effort to free himself from his restraints, but the moment passes and his dick is still achingly hard and an angry red from his ruined orgasm. His ruined orgasm after being edged for possibly hours by strangers, the orgasm that you decided to ruin just to see him squirm.

The rush of power hits you all at once, and with the addition of Sunwoo rubbing at your clit with vigour, you follow after Hyunjin, hips bucking up into Sunwoo’s warm hand as your high rolls through you in waves. You don’t make much noise beyond a brief groan, wanting to hear Hyunjin continue to plead, higher-pitched this time as the toys turn on again to overstimulate him after having his orgasm ruined. He’s an absolute wreck, covered in sweat, tears and cum, hair sticking to his face and framing his head on the mattress like a crown, and you find yourself coming harder than you usually would just from rubbing one out with someone’s fingers.

Sunwoo smirks, retracting his hand and licking them clean, moaning at the taste as he finishes in his own fist, grunting lowly at the feeling. Wanting to repay his generosity, you lean over and take his dick in your mouth, sucking it clean and making him twitch wildly at the oversensitivity, but you move to suck his fingers clean instead before it becomes too much, and he strokes your hair affectionately with his free hand as a silent thank you.

San is a lot louder as he gets closer, moaning and biting his lip, face scrunched up in pleasure. “Me next, please, I’m so close, just–“ He gently holds the back of your head, and you allow him to lead you to his cock and take the tip in your mouth, wrapping your hand around the base while you suck. “Fuck! Yes, just like that, thank you, fuck, I’m gonna come– can you– can I–“

You hum in confirmation, swirling your tongue around him and making sure to drag the ball of your piercing along the underside of the sensitive head just the way he likes it, and he comes within seconds, emptying his load on your tongue. As hot as the action is, it doesn’t taste great, probably due to the amount of americanos he’s been drinking as of late – so, feeling a little cheeky, you lean up to kiss him in his post-orgasm glow, and make sure to shove your tongue in his mouth and give you a taste of himself.

“Mmh–!” He makes a cutely disgruntled noise as you, for all practical purposes, spit his cum back in his mouth, but he doesn’t push you off him right away. When he does, he clicks his tongue a few times with a scrunched nose, tasting himself, then sticks his tongue out. “Okay, loud and clear, you don’t have to say it.”

You snicker at that, happy with your petty revenge and his endearingly peeved expression. “Less coming in my mouth till you lessen your coffee intake, ya nasty.”

San chuckles, covering his face with his arm in mild embarrassment. Only mild – it would probably be far more embarrassing with a partner or a hook-up, but the runaways unique closeness shines through once more as it doesn’t seem to bother him or ruin the moment. There wasn’t much of a moment to ruin, really – it was simply a casual release between friends. Bandmates. Whatever. It was casual, is the point, and comfortable enough to pick on each other like this and for him to dismiss it. “Yeah, yeah. Maybe I’ll invest in some pineapple juice or something.”

Sunwoo simply snorts at the exchange, tucking himself back into his pants and getting up. “Alright, I’m gonna go get us dinner, San are you staying?”

He beams, dimples on full display, charming as can be. “If you would be so kind, yes please.”

The other man simply rolls his eyes as he grabs his keys and goes to slip his shoes on. “I’m only so generous to you because you effectively pay for all our snacks by not looking while on duty.” He turns to you just as he’s about to head out the door. “Give some thought to what we were talking about earlier.”

San glances at you in confusion at you at that, but you don’t pay him any mind. “I think I wanna hear your answer first, mister.”

Sunwoo quirks a brow, the slightest of smirks pulling at his plush lips. That damn infuriating smirk that you usually love but is now driving you an entirely foreign kind of crazy that you are not equipped to deal with.

“Hm. I think that in itself tells me yours.”

He doesn’t give you a chance to elaborate or respond, stepping out into the hallway and shutting the door behind him, leaving you feeling as exposed as Hyunjin was on the screen moments earlier. Of course he has to get the last word in, that ass – but the implications of it haunt you all the way to your bed that night, staring at the ceiling, while Sunwoo sleeps with an arm around you like nothing – or maybe everything? – ever happened.

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