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#when I could be doing literally anything else
writingmeraki · 3 days
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the proposition of us — k.mg drabble.
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❝ in which mingyu realises he hates the idea of you going out on a date with your crush more than he hates you.
( or a date with your crush, alleged crush, makes you think that perhaps you don't actually know how you feel. )
pairing : frenemy/menace! mingyu x reader, frenemies to ?? genre : fluff, a little angsty and a whole bunch of attempted humour. warnings : cussing, bickering, mingyu is down bad to the point he doesn't actually acknowledge how much he likes reader, oblivious reader.
a/n : a very very late birthday gift to my darling, I love you so much 💌 I hope u all like this randomness that sprouted while I was literally showering <3 !! i have a love hate relationship with this but! menace mingyu for the win ( although it is very less here i'll admit ) anyways let me know what you think!!
word count : 1.8k
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Wonseok was good. 
Great even.
The best actually.
But was he the best for you? 
For a long time, that's what you'd concluded. 
His looks were definitely as though Aphrodite herself crafted him and his sharp jawline, perfectly shaped nose, eyes as bright as if diamonds were specifically embedded in them.
Or maybe you were just way too infatuated with him because when you told Chaewon you finally are going on a date with him, all she did was furrow her eyebrows in what seemed like confusion and questioned,
Are you sure you like him and not someone else? 
Now it was your turn to be in confusion at that time, because what on earth did she mean by someone else? Were you doing something that implied you liked someone else and not Park Wonseok, the guy who stole your heart when he saved you from falling and embarrassing yourself,exactly 6 months,10 days ago? 
This same confusion stuck with you like a pestering thought, unable to be moved until you finally left the date, more at unease than at excitement. 
The unease you felt made you irritated because you couldn’t quite understand what it was that was bothering you. 
So in all that chaos, you stood outside the one place that would hold the answers to your confusion. 
The convenience store.
The owner probably thought you had lost it or were drunk, no in between because for one you were all dressed up in your prettiest outfit, makeup done and hair one while you stood outside looking at the sign. 
Who dresses up for the convenience store? A crazy person. 
Are they drunk? Probably. 
Luckily it was none of those. 
You might rip your hair out now, because the one thing you came looking for in the grocery store was not even there.
The blueberry flavoured ice candy. 
Your favourite blueberry flavoured ice candy. 
You just gave up then and there, without buying anything you went outside of the store, and decided the sidewalk was the best place to sit. Ah yes, the sidewalk with the uneven edges and small stones that would dig into your butt and probably bruise it if you sat on it longer than ever. 
Perfect. 
Shutting your eyes, you began to think of possible reasons behind your discontent with Wonseok. 
You didn’t even notice, someone followed you out of the store, with the very thing you’d been craving right in his hands. 
The crinkling sound of a wrapper, made you open your eyes in both surprise and fear, and you almost would have fallen down even while sitting as you looked in front of you. 
A hand, holding...the blueberry ice candy? 
Your eyes immediately darted towards the owner of said hand, and you’re sure the surprise now showed on your face as it was none other than Kim Mingyu. 
Kim Mingyu…how do you even introduce him in your life as a person? Did you hate him? You’d say hate is a strong word, but he was annoying you’d say that, get on your nerves more than you’d admit it.Did you find him hot? Hey now, anyone with two eyes could see he was definitely attractive.
Tall, pouty lips, pretty chocolatey eyes, even prettier smile, buff like very huge buff you were pretty sure he could punch you to another corner if he wanted to with just one hit. 
You’d seen him carrying like two boxes of books once and you remembered how you almost broke your arm trying to even lift one. You also remember staring at how his veins seemed to pop out, how large his hands seem,how nice they would wrap around yo-
Okay you were getting off track now. 
In a way you might say you hate him, not in the despise kind of way but because it was as though he was both everything you wanted to be and everything you wanted to have. 
Both being not attainable to you apparently. 
Now a big question rose up amidst the hundred others you already asked by now, what the fuck was he doing there?
“Here, maybe if you put in the effort of searching more nicely, you’d have found it.” You took the ice candy from his hand, him taking it as an invitation to sit right beside you, his other hand holding his ice cream of the night. 
He looked nice…good actually. It was unfair how great he looked despite his clearly messy hair, worn out black t-shirt and oh God were those grey sweatpants? You tried not too put too much thought into it. 
You frowned in annoyance once you processed his words, finding that there was surely an underlying meaning to it.
“What the fuck are you doing here Mingyu?”
“Last time I checked, the convenience store was a public facility.”
You scoffed at his sarcasm, opening up the candy and for a moment as you took in the dark blue purplish colour, you think all your worries dissolved right there. 
Mingyu thinks he might have melted then and there with the way your eyes immediately sparked up as you saw your ice candy. It was cute how you found the absolute delight in the most seemingly boring things. 
It was one of the things that made him just fall for you even more and more. What you didn’t know about the boy next to you was that he was gone, finished, down all just for you. It began when you went out of your way to save him from being hit by a flying football. His personal knight in shining armour. 
From that moment, he figured if he wanted to be at least a part of your life, he’d somehow have to play something noticeable enough to you. So he took the bite and made himself one of your greatest frenemies. Not that you had any other so probably your only frenemy. 
He hated you…or that’s what he made others think. It was working well until his feelings caught up, his true ones at least, his very real bitter feelings when he found out you went on a date with your ‘crush’. 
He was having a terrible night, figured going to the convenience store would help him and there you were, the cause of all the bitterness. 
“So are you following me or something? And- and how do you know I like this?”
He rolled his eyes, his turn to scoff at you,
“Not everything revolves around you.” A lie, for him, most things did. He did. 
“And I just have good observation skills.” Just for you though, only you. 
The sweet and tangy taste of blueberry juice lingered in your mouth as you blissfully closed your eyes, the coolness of it only adding more to your satisfaction and Mingyu wishes he brought his camera because you looked so…content. So beautiful.
“That sounds stalkerish, please you’re obsessed with me.” It was just a joke, to pull his leg, like you always did.
“What if I am?” Okay and he sounded way too serious for that.
You almost choked on the candy if it weren’t for your quick swallow reflex, eyes widened at his no hesitation reply. 
“Wha-what?”
“What, what?”
“What do you mean by that?” 
He blinked once, twice. And it was then he realised, what he replied, to who he replied. Your widened eyes looked at him both in curiosity and astonishment, lips purplish due to the candy that was now melting in your hand.
“Is it really you know that bad?” You raised an eyebrow in confusion. This was it, for him.
“You know, the proposition of us? Like actually us.”
You held your breath, waiting for the punchline or anything that would indicate he was joking but, if there was something you knew surely about him is that his eyes would never lie. And right now, they showed all seriousness. 
“Like us- as in us being civil? Friends?” You nervously laughed, knowing you could be misinterpreting it but you want to take back your words when you see the way his expression drops and the scowl that’s on his face. 
“No. I mean- I mean as more than friends. More than whatever this is. More like a couple.”
“Min-mingyu are you- are you suggesting we date?”
You didn’t exactly know what else to respond other than the obvious,
“Yes! Yes exactly, finally. I- yes a date. A date is all I ask for.” 
Now you think, you have more questions than ever because why exactly did the idea of going on a date with Mingyu, excite you more than your actual date that you just had?
“When did you even like me? I- what? This is so confusing, I thought I annoyed you?” 
“Well you did, you still do but it’s just- I thought it was the only way to be apart of your life and now that I think of it, it sounds stupid but I just-You know what I'll explain it to you on that date so uh what-what do you say?”
In that moment, he looked at you like a puppy pleading to his owner for a treat, his suspicious eyes looking way too innocent but they indeed made their way right to your heart.
“Okay, okay fine! I’ll go out with you. One date.” 
That stopped his brief mental spiraling immediately, in a bit of shock as he looked at you in disbelief for agreeing. For actually agreeing because he did prepare himself for the worst scenario. Which was you probably humiliating him then and there.
His disbelief quickly turned to content and that, that sickly adorable giddy smile of his made its way onto his face, canines peaking out. It seemed the bitterness he’d been harbouring went away. 
“But what about your date tonight?”
You didn’t ask how he knew, but rather answered his question and your own dilemma,
“I don’t think I actually liked him. Probably just that I was grateful he saved me that time, and I mistook it for something else, I guess.”
“And you’re sure you want to go out with me because it’s not just… I don’t know out of something else too?”
“Don’t worry about that Mingyu, you aren’t that special.”
You joked and the way his smile dropped made you giggle even more. 
“Fine then, I’ll show you just how special I can be. How does Saturday, 7pm, near that downtown record store sound as a meet up place?”
“Alright then. Saturday it is.” 
You didn’t think you’d ever reach a point where Kim Mingyu was something or someone attainable in your radar but there you were, not just with him but a whole date with him. 
Perhaps, this time you were indeed wrong about some things in life remaining as just unrealistic wishes because this was in a way your daydream come true. What a bizzare night. 
And oh, your hands were now also blueberry flavored and bonus! disgustingly sticky too!
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lilbitdepressed27 · 3 days
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Tara Carpenter/Fem!Reader She’s the Man AU
Summary: inspired by she’s the man, with a few changes
Warnings: Chad’s a bit of a jerk but nothing else really
WC: 9.3k
Author’s Note: sorry for any mistakes. Hope y’all enjoy:)
"What?!"
"Sorry girls but I can't really do anything about it."
"But we win more games than the boys do!!"
"Yea what the fuck why aren't they the ones getting cut."
"What?! No you don't, you guys just face other girls that don't know how to play."
You couldn't believe what you were hearing. You couldn't believe you dated him. To be fair you had been sexually confused for a long time. Battling your inner self to be true to who you were. Frankie was your ex boyfriend and you honestly wanted to slap yourself every time you looked back at that relationship. You honestly didn't know what you were thinking.
"Oh really you guys haven't won a game since like what freshman year?" You backfired. "Can't even win a game against the schools rivals, Woodsboro Panthers." The boys in front of you glared at you knowing that it was always a touchy subject. The team had always been sore losers.
"I'm sorry girls but we have to practice unlike some people." The couch and the boys laughed as they walked away.
The girls team was left standing on the field feeling a mix of emotions. You were beyond pissed and there was absolutely nothing you could do.
*
You had been walking home, your music blasting in your ears. You had been extremely bummed out, your dream had always been to play soccer in the big leagues. Wanting nothing more than to play with your idols. Couldn't really do that if your school doesn't have a girls team. You would have to transfer to another school that does have one but you'd doubt that your parents would let you. The closest school would be Woodsboros, but they also didn't have a girls team.
The sudden pull of your jacket had you stumbling back. "Ah what the hell!" You turned around taking off your headphones. Only to be faced with your brothers girlfriend.
"Anthony-Oh ew it's you."
"What do you want Sherrie."
"Where's your brother. When you see him tell him to call me."
"What's the number, 1-800-BIYATCH." You laughed to yourself.
"Whatever. Just tell him."
You laughed as she walked away and went into the house.
*
"Wait what do you mean you're leaving?" Your eyes followed your twin brother (although you didn't really look that much the same, there was similarities but you were a bit taller then he was. And the much better looking twin) he was moving back and forth from his bag and his closet.
"The band got booked to perform in fucking London. Can you believe that?"
"London?  As in London England? Wait, what about school. Don't you start next week?" You were sat on his bed strumming his acoustic guitar.
"Oh right, I wanted to ask if you can cover for me. You know, use that mom voice of yours and I don't know  make a call or something." He closed his bag and packed one of his many guitars. Once he was finished he looked at you with a smile.
"Wait, what about mom and dad?"
"One of the ups of having divorced parents. Mom thinks I'm with dad. Dad thinks I'm with mom. And they both hate each other too much to call each other." Throwing two of his bags out window, followed by his guitar.
"And what about your girlfriend? I don't even know why you date her."
"Cause she's hot, it's a guy thing. Well, I'll see you in like two months, maybe more." Anthony smiled and left through the window.
"Anthony!"
"Oh were you talking with your brother?" The sudden voice of your mother startled you.
"Uh yea, on the phone. What the hell is that?" You used the horrendous dress that your mom was carrying as a way out. If clearly worked when your mom beamed down at you.
"It's your dress. For the-Ugh mom." You groaned, knowing what she was going to go on about. "I said I'm not doing it. There's no way I'm putting on a dress. Literally the last time I wore one was when I was two. I'm not doing it." Standing up and putting your brother's guitar away.
"I don't know even know why I keep trying." She said as she walked away. You rolled your eyes and stood up. Looking into the mirror. Your brothers picture to the side. You picked it up and held it up. You never understood how you were related to him. Let alone a twin. You truly never looked alike. You were a bit taller than he was. And honestly stronger as well.
"Well if you can't beat them. Join them."
**
"Ha. You're funny." The hairdresser laughed. Kirby shook her head as she continued to cut her clients hair. Looking back at you, only to stop laughing. "Oh you're not kidding. Wait you're serious."
"Yea come on Kirb, I have a point to make. And I can't do it if you don't help me. Quinn, Anika back me up." You looked back at your best friends.
"Yea come on Kirby. The coach and the whole school in general think that girls can't do half of the things boys can do. They kept the stupid boys team and they don't even win!" Quinn spoke, she was still heated on the matter. Although she didn't have the same dreams as you, she still wanted to support you.
"Yea Kirby, they even got new uniforms and lockers for the boys team. A losing team might I add again." Anika voiced from your side.
"Come on Kirby please." The three of you spoke simultaneously.
The elderly client butting in. "Yea come on Kirby."
With a laugh Kirby laughed and nodded. "Fine."
*
"Damn. You make one fine ass man." Quinn whistled when you stepped out. You so badly wanted to scratch your head. The wig was something you'd have to get used to.
"Shut up. Do I really look like a man?"
"Yea one hot ass man." Anika joked as she stood next to you, reaching up to fix your wig. Quinn laughed from her seat as she ate her popcorn.
"Okay. Now we got the walk. The talk. Tomorrow you start. Remember be confident. You got this. We got all the paper work ready, oh and also. Remember to respond to the name Anthony. Anika literally tried to get your attention using your brothers name, and you didn't listen. Cause you have to get used to it." Kirby said as she got some of the popcorn from Quinn.
"Okay. I got this. I got this."
**
"I don't got this. Take me back. This was a stupid idea. Don't you ever let me come up with any more ridiculous ideas ever again. I can't believe you actually listened to me. You never listen. I can't believe I came this far. Well it's far enough. Take me back-Y/n stop!"
"Relax. You got this, now suck it up and get your shit together." Kirby handed you your bags and pushed you towards the entrance of the school.
You gulped and took a deep breath in trying to calm your nerves. With a look of encouragement from Kirby you made your way into the school.
*
Going into the boy side of the dorm rooms had been everything you expected and more. It was literally your worst nightmare come to life. The smell alone was enough for you to want to turn on your heels and leave. A mixture of body odor and a tone of axe spray. But you had to do this. You now had a point to make and you were going to make it.
You've never moved so fast to make it to your dorm. Slamming the door shut once, the relief of being in the safety of your room was washed away when you felt eyes on you. You were quick to straighten up and eyes wide as you looked at the three boys.
Clearing your throat, remembering to deepen your voice. "What up. Y'all must be my roommates." Nervously fumbling with your keys.
"Uh na I'm your roommate Chad. This is Ethan and that's Wes. They live next door."
You nodded as you put your bags down. Trying to swallow the anxiety that you felt coming up your throat.
"Yo what's your name?"
You turned around to look who was talking. Wes sat on the window seat playing with a ball.
"Anthony Y/ln, so you play the beautiful game bruhs, bros? Brothers?" You had tried to remember how boys talk but at the moment your mind was going blank.
"Yea, Ethan midfield and Wes plays defense and I'm a striker. What about you?"
"Center Midfield."
You cleared your throat as you got unpacked your bag. Taking out your boots, only remembering the tampons you shoved into the boot when Chad pointed them out.
"Dude why do you have tampons?!"
"Uh. I get really bad nose bleeds?"
After the horrifying and embarrassing display of you shoving a tampon up your nose. You were left with a big sense of regret. As the boys laughed and mocked you.
*
So far it's been alright.
That's a big fat lie. So far it's been hell. Things are horrible. The first try outs were today and man. You'd think it had been your first time playing. You had always thought you were great at soccer. It was a sport you loved. You had played it for the longest time. Now you wouldn't go and say you were horrible but you had a lot to learn. Especially since you made it on to the second string. That had been disappointing.
"Good job boys. Nice work, for the second strings don't feel discouraged. You are just as much on this team as the first stringers. Now go hit the shower. I'll see you guys tomorrow." Coach Loomis spoke before leaving to his office.
Showers?!
Crap! How could I forget about the freaking showers?!
You tried to think of any possible reason why you wouldn't be able to. You'd didn't really want to see anyone naked. Let alone a bunch of immature boys. But the closer you got to the boys locker the more you were starting to panic.
"Y/LN! Principal Riley wants to talk to you. So get a move on." Coach yelled from his office.
You had never felt so much relief like you did this moment. Never moving  so fast to get out of a room before.
*
The talk with the principal had been one of the weirdest and most awkward talks you had ever been in. As you walked out of the office you felt your body collide with a smaller body.
"Oh my god I'm so sorry. Are you alright?" The sudden action causing your voice to come out normal before you could even realize. Moving to help pick up the books the shorter girl dropped.
"It's okay."
You looked up, only for your breath to hitch in your throat. The girl in front of you was so, beautiful. Completely gorgeous. The faint freckles that littered her face, made you want to count every single one. Her dark brown eyes, were so mesmerizing that you could get lost in that pool of dark chocolate. Her small smile had your heart hammering in your chest. The dimples that appeared had to be the cutest things you had ever seen.
"Uh here's your books." You cleared your throat deepening your voice, the smile that she directed your way was enough for you to almost go weak to the knees.
"Thanks. You're the new transfer student, right? I'm Tara."
Tara. What a beautiful name. You returned the smile, "Y/-Uh Anthony. It's nice to meet you Tara." You held out your hand for her to shake, at the sound of her giggle, your smile grew just a tad bit. But the moment her soft, small, warm hand was in yours it was like your hand was made to hold hers. At the sight of her blushing cheeks, you pulled your hand away, clearing your throat.
"Well it was nice to meet ya Tara. I have to go and do some, guy stuff. Uh I'll see you around." With a nod you were quick to walk away. Part of you hoping you'd run into the Tara again.
*
"Dude this is not working. Who knew making friends as a dude could be so hard. Not to mention that I'm starting to smell. Kirby how could I forget about the showers. My roommate is a bit of jackass and-Alright take it easy. I can help you with the making friends situation and the shower problem. Let me just get the girls I've got a plan." Kirby cut you off before hanging up, not giving you a chance to respond.
"Kirby? Hello? Ugh, I hate when she does that." You mumbled. The past two days of being a 'man' have been a little bit harder than you had expected. Your roommates along with his friends are bit of jerks and clearly didn't want to be around you.
It wasn't long till, Kirby showed up with Quinn and Anika. Who had bright smiles on their faces. You hurried to get in the car. "Oh I've miss-oh wow you stink." Quinn cut herself off, pulling away from you.
"Don't remind me. Now what's your plan?"
*
With feeling fresh and clean, you walked into the restaurant with a new found confidence. You knew at least half of the students and soccer team were in the place at the moment. It was great for Kirby's plan, 'Make friends plan'. Her own way of making friends for you was well, "the boy way". That's why she had brought Quinn and Anika.
"Fuck here comes Anthony. Spread out so it looks like we don't got room." Chad nudged Ethan to the side as they spread out in the booth. It wasn't like he hated the guy but since the tampon moment in their room. He wasn't in a rush to make friends with his roommate.
"Oh my god Anthony Y/ln! Oh my god I've missed you so much."
Chad was pulled from his conversation with Ethan to see a red haired girl. She was hot.
"Quinn. Hey baby, how you doing?"
Chad couldn't understand how someone like Anthony could have girl like this one. The guy was weird. He acted completely strange. But here he was with this hot girl. Eyes widening a bit when the girl lightly kissed Anthony on the lips before leaving. He heard Ethan chocking on his soda when yet another girl, just as hot, called out to Anthony. The way this dark haired girl refused to let him go. Only leaving when Anthony slapped her butt.
"What the fuck? Did those two just talk to Anthony? Him?" Wes spoke in pure disbelief. There was no way. Seeing a hot brunette coming his way. He took his chance. "Hey there pretty lady."
"Ew. Are you talking to me?"
"I was just- Yea sure let me make it clear, girls with asses like mine don't talk to boys with faces like yours."
The two teammates shared a look, trying to hold in their laughter at the face Wes was making. The one of pure embarrassment.
"I'm looking for my boyfriend Anthony Y/ln."
The three boys jaw dropped in disbelief.
*
"Fuck it's your brothers girlfriend. Don't let her get too close or she'll recognize you." Kirby had spoken so quickly you barely had time to understand before you heard Sherries obnoxiously loud voice.
"Wait what?"
"Anthony!"
"Oh fuck uh be gone you craziest-" You felt a small sense of fear as you tried to dodge Sherries attempts to get to you. You had gone as far as using a stack of pizza boxes to cover your face. "Can't you take a hint. If I don't answer your phone calls or your texts. It could only mean one thing. We are done!"
Sherrie had acted like you expected. Leaving with scream of anger and most likely embarrassment. You were relieved on the other hand. Your cover was not blown. You heard the cheers and even felt the acceptance of your schoolmates.
"Dude that was awesome."
"You're officially my idol."
"Make room for the man."
*
Like Kirby had predicted. The plan had worked. You had the "respect" of your teammates and the school. Although you kinda felt a little bad for Sherrie. Even though she's been nothing but a bitch to you. You also didn't stink that was good. You had gotten used waking up super early in the morning. Getting the showers to yourself.
"Hey Anthony."
You turned at the sound of your brothers name. That was also something you kinda got used to. Being addressed as your brothers name and not yours.
At seeing who called for you, it had you smiling in a way you couldn't really control. "Tara hey. How are you doing?" You faced the shorter girl. She returned the smile as she looked up at you.
"I've been good. I haven't seen you around the past week. How's the school treating you." Tara had tried to see Anthony around the campus. But the campus was huge. She hasn't even got a glimpse of Anthony which was extremely disappointing.
"Oh it's been something else. I like the campus though." You looked down to what she was holding and it was stack of what you could clearly tell were heavy books. You reached for them without really realizing that you were. "Let me help you with those." You didn't really give her a chance to decline before taking most of the books.
"Thank you. But you didn't have to." Tara could feel the warmth coming from her cheeks. She could only hope that Anthony couldn't notice.
"It's okay, now what are you even studying that requires you to carry so many books." At sound of her laugh you smiled, her laugh was so sweet.
"Oh I've been transferred out of my class into another. Apparently I was too smart for that class."
"Nice, a smart girl." You teased smiling in satisfaction when you saw her blush. "No but seriously, aren't you running for class president?"
"Yes, I'm been elected to run. It's nothing." She looked away from his gaze. Her own mother had been dismissive of her achievements. She hated the feeling of being a disappointment. She's tried not to let her mother's words affect her but, it's her mother. The harsh words are bound to have an affect.
"Are you kidding? That's great, you were elected, which that alone is awesome. Don't sell yourself short. But don't worry future Ms.President. You have my vote." The smile you got in return was something you'd cherish. You hated how sad she had looked for a just a second before the look was gone.
"Thank you. That means a lot. Well this is me." Never had she felt so disappointed to arrive to her class. She had wanted to keep talking to Anthony. The way he acted around her was in a way no other boy has. He didn't treat her like she was just a piece of meat, like she was just some type of trophy he could show off to his friends. He was different from the other boys in school. "I'll see you later?" Hoping her voice didn't come off as hopeful.
"Of course. Later Ms.Future President." With a small bow you handed her books and walked away. Smiling when you heard her laugh.
*
Arriving into your biology class was something you weren't looking forward to. You hated cutting open any animals or anything that was once alive. Taking a seat as your roommate and his friends took a seat in front of you. The boys becoming your friends was also something new. Ever since that day at the pizza place your popularity had grown.
"Dude I keep forgetting to ask. But how long did you date that girl?" Chad asked as he took a seat in front of his roommate.
"Too long-Alright pick a name out of the bowl and who ever you have will be your lab partner for the rest of the year."
Taking one of the pieces of paper from the bowl you unfolded it. Smiling at the sight of the name. "Tara Carpenter." You looked up, searching for your brun-the brunette that was becoming your favorite. Eyes connecting with the beautiful chocolate eyes. Oh how you loved chocolate. Seeing the smile on her face as she looked at you. Sending a small wave.
"Dude you know Tara Carpenter? Switch with me." Chad couldn't help the small sense of jealousy at the way the girl he liked was looking at Anthony.
"Yea and no cause I said her name out loud." You gathered your things and moved to table Tara had moved to. Placing your bag on the table as you sat down. Leaning forward just bit.
"Hey Tara. I gotta be completely honest with you. The whole dissecting thing freaks me out, so I think you're gonna have to take the reins on this one." You whispered to her. Hoping no one else heard you.
"Wow I don't think any other guy would have admitted to that."
"Crap, you're right." Your eyes widen as you looked down at the paper with a cut open frog. The feeling of wanting to barf came strong.
"No no. It's okay. I got you. I'll take the lead." Tara wanted to wipe the frown on his face. It was such an adorable look but she also wanted to comfort him, so she reached for his hands, taking his hand into hers. His hands were so soft. Not like any other boy's hands she's touched. The warmth and softness of his hands made her want to hold on to them longer.
"Uh no papers from other classes on the table." A boy you e never seen before said, paper was pushed in between in your face and Tara's. Seeing the color of the paper. You quickly tried to grab it but Tara was quicker.
"Oh what's this poems?"
"Lyrics. They're hi-my my old stuff."
"You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be. And I don't wanna go home right now."
You sighed in relief, realizing it was a song you wrote for your brother to sing. He wanted a romantic song and your were such a sucker for them.
"This is really good."
The way she was looking at you had your throat in a knot. Feeling like she could read your mind by the way she was staring intensely into your eyes.
*
As you walked out of the classroom you were pulled by the back of your shirt. "Dude what the fuck Chad!" Pulling your shirt from his grip.
"Anthony my guy. Did you tell her anything about me?"
"Who Tara? Was I supposed to?"
"Come on man. You could convince her to go out with me."
He looked so serious you couldn't help but laugh. "Dude you've been going to school together for, how long? I don't think she likes y-Come on! If you help me. I'll help you train to make first string for the rivalry game."
"Wait what? Seriously?" You were good, but apparently not good enough to make first string. And you had something to prove. You couldn't be distracted by anything. Not even a pretty brunette. It wasn't like Tara liked you.
"Okay, I'll tell her all about Chad Minks and how he's a great dude. But I won't force her."
"You're the man Anthony!" Chad cheered, this was going to work. He knew as much. He just needed someone to sweet talk him up to Tara. Then he would be the hottest guy dating the hottest girl in the school.
*
Training with Chad was fun. The more you trained with him. The more if felt like you were getting better than before. The love you had for game had always been big. Always trying to improve your self in how you play. With Chad's help you were a whole lot prepared and skilled during practices.
As for helping with Tara. It was coming along. Well the best it could without sounding pushy about the situation.
"So when can you let me read the rest of that poem?"
You were brought out of your thoughts at the sound of Tara's voice. You tried to avoid the frog that was cut open in front of you.
"Poem? What poem?" You teased, smiling when she squinted her eyes at you.
"Ugh you suck. I'm going to get you to read it to me one day. You just watch."
"Now, I heard from your friend Amber that you like someone."
"What?" Tara felt her eyes widen. She was going to kick Amber's ass when she sees her. Amber wouldn't tell him, that she liked him right? The feeling of her heart racing as she watched Anthony write down some notes before looking right at her with those soft y/ec eyes.
"Yea, is it by any chance Chad Minks? Cause I've seen what the way he looks at you. I mean I can see it."
Seeing the disbelief and was that disgust? You weren't sure. Reading people wasn't something you were really good at.
"Chad?"
"Yea."
"No."
"Yea."
"No! I mean he's good looking and all but he's just not the guy for me." Tara had tried to like Chad. He was what most girls wanted at the school. But every time she looked at him, she felt nothing. Chad was just like every other jock that has tried to get into her pants. Only wanting her for her body. She had seen how Chad was with Liv. Liv had been so in love with Chad. But the moment Chad got bored he left Liv. Liv had been left heart broken. Tara had gotten used to blocking out any guy that had tried to hit on her. Most of the guys (if not all of them) had always succeeded in making her extremely uncomfortable.
"Hmm I don't know maybe there's more to him than you think there is." You hated yourself for even bringing it up, you could tell this conversation was annoying Tara.
"So he's not just another dumb jock, who wants to get in my pants. So he could tell his friends but is too-Insecure to treat you as an equal?" You understood how she felt. It wasn't long you were also dating a dumb jock.
Tara looked at the taller boy in shock. Never had she met someone, let alone a boy, understand what she had felt. Seeing him agree had honestly left her feeling baffled.
"You know you are the first guy at this school who hasn't tried anything with me."
You felt you cheeks heat up as you cleared your throat, "Oh uh I'm not really looking for another relationship. Just got out of one that was a bit, hard I guess? You're a great friend Tara. You're actually the only person in this school I feel comfortable around."
Even if she felt a bit more that just disappointed that he only saw her as a friend. She offered him a smile. "I feel the same way about you." Her vocie coming out softer than usual. Looking into those beautiful y/ec eyes. It was enough for her to get lost in them. Even if he only saw her as a friend. She could work with that.
"Good, and just take my advice. Chad's a pretty cool dude, get to know the guy."
"I'll consider it." She was most certainly not going to. She watched as the soccer player tried to focus back on the task at hand. The cut open frog they still had to be dissected. The cute grossed out facial expression on his face was too cute for her to ignore.
"So what's that exactly?"
"Uh I think that's the spleen." A small noise of acknowledgment was all she got in response before she saw Anthony fainting and falling to his side. With a chocked laugh she was quick to check on him.
*
"I honestly thought you were joking about the dissecting thing freaking you out this bad." Tara couldn't hold back her giggles as he finally woke up. She had been worried at first. But the more she remembered the face the soccer player made, the more she couldn't help but to laugh.
"Ugh." You sat up, realizing you were now in the nurses room. You felt a little warm inside to see that Tara was sitting next your bed. Wondering if she was sitting there while you were out cold.
"How are you feeling? Down to dissect more frogs?" This time Tara couldn't help the full belly laugh.
As much as you tried to keep a straight face, a smile made its way to your face. You really liked the sound of her laugh. Her smile, the dimples you liked so much being on display. "You're so mean."
Tara brought up her hand to cover her mouth. Trying to control her laughter. "I'm sorry."
She looked utterly beautiful. The sun coming from the window shined on her like if she were an angel. All you wanted was to kis-Uh oh. No. No you couldn't be falling in love with Tara.
You couldn't.
*
"Yo! You okay? I can't believe you passed out over a cut open frog." The laugh that followed was nothing like Tara's.
"Yea whatever. But I've got you half way. She's considered going out with you." You flopped on your bed, looking up at the ceiling. Falling in love was not part of this plan. You couldn't for many reasons. One being the most obvious, YOU WERE A GIRL! For starters. You were a girl pretending to a boy, pretending to be your brother. Tara was obviously straight. And if you did show any signs of liking her, it would be misleading. You were a girl.
Tara was straight.
"Wait really? So should I go ask her out?"
"What? No!" Trying to ignore the jealousy you felt coursing through your body. "You don't want to freak her out."
"Ugh I hate the waiting game. I've been waiting for the past years. Since 6th grade. That’s five whole years. You have no idea how long I've wanted to, to date her. She's the hottest girl in the school."
You narrowed your eyebrows at your roommate. You won't deny that Chad is a great soccer player. He was outstanding on the field. And he was nice enough to help you out to make first string. But other than that you weren't really sure why he was so eager to be with someone who clearly didn't like him back.
*
"Wait what do you mean? You think he doesn't like you?"
Tara groaned into her pillow. As much as she enjoyed being with the taller soccer player. She couldn't ignore the small little voice in her head telling her that Anthony didn't like her back.
"I don't know Amber. He's not like any other boy I've ever met before. He hasn't even flirted with me. Not even once!" She chose to ignore the laugh coming from her best friend.
"What? There's no way. Every guy here has flirted with you at least once." Amber has watched for the past days how this guy had her best friend hooked with just his presence. She won't deny the guy was kinda good looking. But there was something about Anthony that was making her sexually confused? Amber was a proud lesbian. There was no denying that, but she had gone soooo long without finding any boy attractive. Not even when she was little. But now Anthony Y/Ln was a first. Now she didn't like him in that way like Tara did. But there was something about him that was familiar. She just couldn't seem to know what.
"Wait really?" Come to think about it, Amber has not seen Anthony flirt with any girl at all. Every time she saw him he it was always either during class (which he did really pay attention to) and then during the soccer practices. "Wait you don't think he's gay do you?"
That thought had never even crossed her mind. The thought of Anthony being gay had her sitting up straight to face Amber.
"What? No! There's no way-I mean, I don't know. Oh my god let it be me to fall for a guy who could possibly be gay." She groaned even louder as she covered her face with her hands. If Anthony was gay, she would have to move on. Or she could just ask. He did have those two girls at the pizza parlor. Not to mention that crazy ex. But if that were the case. Maybe he's bisexual. Or just now gave up on the girls and just wants boys now.
Ugh. It was just her luck.
*
"What's up Anthony."
You looked away from your open book. You had finally gotten away from Chad and his friends. A moment of peace away from those boys was what you desperately needed. They were rowdy and fun but you could only take so much before you wanted to pull your hair out.
"Sup Amber. How's it going?" Amber was Tara's best friend. You liked Amber. She was always putting Chad in his place when he tried to flirt with Tara. It was always a funny sight.
"Eh it's going but I gotta ask you something." She moved to sit next to Anthony.
You closed your book and looked at the shorter girl. "Sure what's up." You moved to grab your water bottle to take sip.
"Are you gay?"
The water burned as it went up your nose, you spluttered out wet coughs as you tried get your breathing back to normal. You took the napkins Amber offered you. "Jesus Amber. No I am not gay." Well you were. And as funny as it would be for these students to believe your brother Anthony was gay, you weren’t that mean of a sister.
"Really? Not even a little bit?" Amber did not feel convinced for the weirdest reason. She just couldn't put a finger on it.
"No not even a little bit. Why?" You let out a chuckle once you had your breathing under control and you were no longer chocking. Gay?
"Well can you blame a girl for asking." So he wasn't gay, Tara did have a chance. Amber couldn't help but to feel excitement. Mingling is something she was great at.
*
You hated being here, carnivals. Absolutely hated them. Clowns were literally your worst nightmare and those things were everywhere. Not only did you hate clowns. But you absolutely hated that you had to change from being you to your brother. So you opted to just staying as you for the remainder of the day.
"Wait they thought Anthony was gay?" Anika asked again once she was finished laughing.
"Anthony gay? Girl he is as straight as they come." Quinn laughed as well, the girls along with Kirby had arrived at carnival before you did. You mom had called the moment you arrived and said you were signed up for the kissing booth. Part of you had never felt so offended and angry. You were not going to be kissing no strangers. No matter the cause before hanging up.
"Any cute girls there?" Kirby nudged your shoulder as you walked around. Noticing the blush on her younger friend. "Oh so there is. What's her name?"
"Stop. There's no-Liar! Come on. Tell us." Your two best friend nudged and pleaded to know. You rolled your eyes although you were smiling.
"There is on-" You were cut off by someone bumping into your body. You were able to catch them before they fell. "Oh I'm sorry."
At the sound of the voice, the voice that sounded awfully familiar! Tara furrowed her eyebrows before looking up at the person. Only for her eyes to widen in shock. The girl standing in front of her looked exactly like Anthony. Almost like a spitting image. "Do I know you?" She couldn't help up to ask.
"Uh no. I don't think so. Sorry." You moved to walk around Tara. As much as you wanted to talk to her as you and not Anthony. You couldn't, not without blowing your cover. You were quick (but not too quick to make it weird) away.
Kirby and the girls were quick to follow you. Noticing Anika sharing a long stare with one of the girls. "Oh my god was that her!" Speaking once she was far away from the short girl.
"Would you shut up, and yes that's her." Your cheeks flushing at the teasing grins that were looking your way.
"Dude she's cute!" Quinn shook your shoulders in pure excitement.
"You should totally try to get w-No, she's straight. And I don't know if you know this but I'm a girl." You shook her head, continuing your walk only to see Chad and Frankie fighting. You were quick to run to the scuffle. Trying your best to pull the two dude's away from each other.
"Frankie stop!"
Chad turned around at the voice, opening his mouth to say something he had been momentarily distracted enough for Frankie to hit him. Making Chad stumble into you. You caught him right when the security showed up. Quinn and Anika pulling you away before you could get in trouble.
"Hey are you okay?"
You were standing to the side, after being yelled at by your mom. It wasn't even your fault but you let her yell at you. The girls had gone to get food while you waited. The sound of Tara's voice you looked towards her. She offering such cute shy smile.
"Uh yea I'm okay. Thanks for asking." You murmured, you weren't sure why you felt so shy now. Maybe it because you weren't sure if Tara would like you as Y/n and not as Anthony.
"Are you related to Anthony Y/Ln by any chance?"
"Yea he's my twin brother."
"Wow you guys are crazy alike. It's almost uncanny. How do you know Chad?" Tara couldn't get over how you looked so much like Anthony. Ever since she bumped into you earlier that day. She couldn't stop thinking about you and Anthony. She had always been comfortable with her sexuality. She had always said she was bisexual. And right now was a good example why. Anthony. He was so charming, so sweet and just so funny. Honest. You. You were honestly the most beautiful woman she's ever seen.
"Yea we get that a lot. I'm Y/n." Sticking out your hand for her to shake.
"Tara." Tara took your out stretched hand. Your hand taking hers in a gente but soft shake. She looked down at your hand, it was awfully the same as Anthony. Down to the same softness that she has grown to like.
"Damn that guy who beat up Frankie was kinda hot, wasn't that your brothers roommate." Quinn asked as she wrapped her arms around yours, interrupting whatever was happening between you and the short girl. From the corner of her she was able to see the same girl that had bumped into you looking right at you. Maybe that girl wasn't as straight as she seemed. "Hi I'm Quinn."
"Nice to meet you. I should go back to my friends. It was nice meeting you Y/n." She couldn't stop looking at you, she hoped that it wouldn't be the last time she saw you. A past of her also feeling a bit of disappointment seeing the red head being so close to you.
*
"Dude, what? What's on your face." You spluttered with your words at seeing the tampon up Chad's nose. Part of you wanted to laugh.
"Oh this? Yeah I grabbed one of your." He pointed to the tampon as he got up. "And they actually work." He took the bloody tampon out and threw it away.
"Dude what happened?"
"Well turns out the dude I fought was your sister's ex. And man she looks just like you. It's kinda scary. I mean I have a twin but we don't look that alike. She's kinda hot. Is she single?"
"Eh we get that all the time. And yea she is but she's gay."
Chad's shoulder visibly deflated. "Damn."
"I thought you liked Tara?" You narrowed your eyes slightly. Hoping it wasn't noticeable.
"I do. But I can admire another woman. And your sister is hot. Can't believe she dated a douche bag like Frankie." He didn't even do anything to the guy and Frankie had just lost his cool. And Chad wasn't one to back down.
"Yea, everyone gots at least one person they regret dating." You laid on your bed. Remembering how Tara finally met you as your true self.
*
"Hi Anthony." You looked away from your homework to see Tara sitting down in front of you. You were once again in the library.
"Hey Tara. How was the carnival yesterday?" You closed your book, focusing on the way Tara was looking at you. She had the same look of when she was studying something. In this case she was studying you. Which was making you quite nervous. "You okay tar?"
Seeming to be snapped back to reality. Tara nodded, "Yea sorry. It was fun. Why weren't you there?"
Shrugging in response, "Crazy ex showed up and wouldn't leave me alone so I just ended up leaving."
"Mmh, I didn't know you were a twin." Tara couldn't get over how much Anthony and his sister looked alike. It was truly uncanny. It was like she was looking at a man version of the girl she saw at the carnival.
"Oh you met Y/n? How was that?" You wanted to know what she thought of you.
"She was sweet. We didn't talk long, her girlfriend showed up."
"Girlfriend?"
"Yea this pretty red head."
You let out a laugh. She thought you were dating Quinn. You love Quinn she was one of your best friends. "Oh you mean Quinn. No that's just my sisters best friend."
Having a weird sense of relief, she wasn't even sure why. She had just met you. Why did she feel jealous. She had no reason to feel this type of jealousy. "Oh. They just seemed close."
"They've been friends since they were in diapers. They've just had a close bond since like forever."
"That's sweet..Wait didn't you kiss the red head?!" The memory had been shoved right to the front of her brain.
"Oh...yea. Uh.." Think faster!! "That was more of a friendly kiss? Quinn was just trying to help me break up with my girlfriend at the time. Sherrie was-is crazy. She was also kinda of a bitch to Y/n."
At the mention of that girl being mean to Y/n. It had her feeling, protective? You had looked so nice. Your soft y/ec eyes held some type of warmth. She wanted nothing more than to talk to you again.
*
"Y/LN!" You jumped up from the leg press machine. You had been working out with Chad for the past hour. The game against your school was less than a week away. And you have been training hard. The practices have been a lot more easier now that you knew how to play like a man. Chad had been a great help.
"Yes coach?"
A jersey being thrown at you. You looked down at the jersey. Your last name stitched on the back of the jersey along with a big number name below it. You felt your eyes widen in shock and excitement.
"You're first string for the rivalry game."
"Really?"
"No I was joking, you idiot." Coach Loomis said sarcastically before walking away.
You couldn't contain your excitement. Jumping up and down. "Yes!" Chad laughed as he shook his head.
"Congratulations man."
*
"Oh I know. Ask out Chad, like in a friend date. But don't let him know that, do it in front of Anthony. See how he reacts." Amber looked at Chad and Anthony from across the gym.
"But I don't like Chad."
"Which is why it will be a friend date. But you'll tell him that on the date."
Tara debated the plan. She really liked Anthony. His personality, his attitude, the way he was around her. It was so refreshing. So pure.
"Okay."
*
You couldn't stop smiling. All your hard work was finally paying off. Your point that you were trying to make was almost done. Wanting finish your workout before calling the girls.
"Hey Chad."
You both looked up to see Tara in all her glory standing there. Looking at Chad.
"Tara! Hi."
You could tell that he was nervous. With a quick look from Tara. You sent her an awkward thin lipped smile. Hoping Tara couldn't tell how jealous and dejected as you seemed.
"How about we go out on Friday."
But she did. She could see how the happy glint in his eyes faded as soon as she mentioned the date. She watched as Anthony turned around fiddling with his phone.
"Really?! I uh mean. Cool. Yea cool I'll see you Friday."
*
You hated yourself for feeling so jealous. You hated it. You had no right to feel jealous. Tara was straight and clearly giving Chad a chance. You had to focus on the bigger picture. So you tired to do that.
Staying late at the gym before the big game tomorrow. You didn't know how long you were until you saw the time. Figuring you needed some good nights rest before the game tomorrow. With a quick shower, you made your way back to your dorm room.
You had expected for Chad to be home so quickly. You were sure he would still be out with Tara.
"So are you gonna tell me the truth?"
The truth? You looked at Chad wide eyed. Did he know that you weren't a boy. You were sure you had been good at hiding your true self. Maybe your wig had fallen off while you were sleeping.
"Uh truth?"
"Yes the fucking truth."
He seemed angry, well you assumed he had a right to. Maybe he felt a little weirded out that girl has been rooming with him for a while.
"Okay, I'll tell you the truth. But just know that I did this cause I had to prove something. I've always loved soccer and-What so you use me to get better at soccer and then what steal my girl."
You were confused now. What on earth was Chad talking about? "Wait what? What are you talking about?"
"Dude stop lying I saw you!" Chad knew he may have been overacting. First he was a bit mad and disappointed that the date hadn't gone as he had hoped. The date had been so awkward and he had just felt so uncomfortable, and top off the date Tara had told him she didn't like him in that way. When he had seen Anthony, his so called friend kissing Tara. He had felt so betrayed and extremely jealous.
"Saw me do what?"
With his anger at an all time high. He had pushed Anthony out of the room without any further explanation. Slamming the door in Anthony's face.
"What the fuck?" You were left confused. With no where else to sleep you walked away towards the library. Hoping that it was open.
*
"Yo Anthony! What are you doing here?!" Jumping up from the chairs you had pushed together in a form of makeshift bed. "The game is about to start."
This had you almost tripping over your own two feet as you ran out of the library towards the boys locker room. Confusion taking over as you saw your uniform was gone. Fumbling with your phone hoping to find some answers.
Tony: thanks for unpacking my things and making my room. You're the best sis
Tony: why did you sneak tampons in my drawer. Jerk
"Fuck."
**
You could only watch from the safety of hiding under the bleachers as your brother destroyed all your hard work. He truly was a horrible athlete. It was like watching a baby trying to walk. If anything a baby could probably play better.
Sighing in relief as the whistle blew out signaling the ending of the first half. Watching as the coach Loomis spoke to your brother. Banging your head on the metal. Your brother walked past the bleachers and you took this opportunity to yank him under the bleachers.
"What the fu-Y/n?"
"Dude what the hell are you doing?" You punched his arm, he was supposed to give you a heads up before coming back.
"Ow! Me? Why are you dressed like me?"
"Ugh I was trying to prove to our old school that a girl could be just as good as any boy on the damn team. Can you believe they cut the girls soccer team and not the boys?"
"Wait what? But the girls team win more games?" He knew how much you love the game. There was never a game he would miss when you played.
"Wait, what are you even doing here?"
"Oh!" Remembering what had happened last night. "There was this girl. She kissed me. And even though it was only a second cause when she pulled away from me and looked at me like I was stranger. But I came to look for her cause she was hot."
"That's what Chad was talking about." You mumbled to yourself. "Give me back my uniform. And stay hidden.”
*
“Wait what do you mean you kissed him?” Amber asked as she looked away from the game. Half time had just started and it looked like Anthony was being given another chance. She had never seen someone play so horribly. It was almost laughable.
“Yea I did.”
“Then why do you sound disappointed? Shouldn’t you be happy, you have been crushing on the guy for a while now.” She looked back at the match. The second half time hasn’t started yet.
“I don’t know. I felt nothing. He usually makes me feel so much but last night, it felt weird like I was kissing a stranger. His lips weren’t as soft as they looked.” She didn’t really remember seeing his lips last night. But she remembered seeing those lips everyday. They had always looked so soft so kissable. The lips she kissed last night were not soft.
“Well I’ve seen him practice and he looked great during practice. The way he was playing in the first half, it might as well have been a stranger.” Mindy spoke up from her spot. There was no way Anthony was playing like newbie when he had trained so hard to make first string.
Quinn, Kirby and Anika shared a look. They were sitting behind the three girls. Maybe the short girl wasn’t as straight as they had assumed.
*
The second half was going a whole lot better than the first half. With you scoring the first goal with the help of Ethan. The stadium bursting out in cheers. The score now being 1-0.
You could still fell the hostility coming from Chad. He refused to look at you, going as far as to not even passing you the ball. This caused him to lose the ball. Leading your old school to score. Tying the game.
“Dude come on I know you’re mad but let’s put that aside for the next forty minutes.” You made the mistake of placing your hand on his shoulder. This caused him to push you away.
“Get your hands off me.”
“Chad come on-” you were pushed again before Ethan and Wes held him back.
“Do you two little princesses have to step off or something?” Hearing your ex’s voice was not what you needed. Hearing his obnoxious laughter along with his teammates was almost ruining the happiness you felt. “Do you ne—Y/n?!”
You didn’t want to look at him. Cause now you were for sure made. The dream you had of proving yourself was burning down. With a heavy sigh you turned around. Seeing Frankie’s eyes widen in shock. Knowing the act was over. You took off your wig. Hearing gasps from literally everyone.
“You’re a girl?!” Chad asked no longer angry. He couldn’t believe he just physically pushed a girl. And his push hadn’t been gentle.
“Yea sorry about the lying, I had a point to prove.” You moved your gaze towards your coach. He had his arms crossed.
Hearing the laughter coming from Frankie and his teammates, even his coach had laughed. “You can’t play with a girl. It says in the rule book.” The coach said smugly. This was when coach Loomis stepped up. Taking the book from the other coach.
“What rule book? Here in Woodboro we don’t discriminate. Based on gender.” Coach pointed his finger at the other coach’s chest. And you knew it hurt based on how the other coach stumbled back and how rubbed the spot.
“Alright then. You think you can beat us with a girl on your team. Good luck. You’re gonna need it.”
With a wink being shot your way by Coach Loomis you smiled excitedly. You couldn’t believe he was going to let you play. You quickly put your hair up in a ponytail so it wouldn’t be in your face. You were now more confident more comfortable.
*
Winning the game had been everything and more. The way Frankie had run off crying was so funny, extremely hilarious actually. You had been told off by your parents like you had expected but you could tell they were proud. Especially your dad.
You also watched as Chad was being down talked by your brother. Probably telling Chad off for pushing you earlier.
“All this time you were Y/n?” You turned around to see Tara standing there. She had not looked mad or anything. It was more a of curiosity.
“Yes. I’m sorry. I know it was misleading and wrong. For that I’m sorry.” You fiddled with your fingers. Upon hearing laugh you looked up towards her. Her smile brighter than before.
“Are you kidding? If anything I need glasses. Cause wow. Also sorry for kissing yesterday. Kinda thought you were her.” Anthony walked back to his sister and the hot girl, although a bit dejected he was happy you were happy. He had never seen you so happy yet nervous at the same time. By the way Tara was looking at you. He knew she felt the same way. With a dismissive wave he smiled and walked away.
“So? You’re not mad?”
With a shake of her head, she took your hand in hers. “A little bit, but that’s because I was so sexually confused, then you came along and I’ve never been so confused. Now I’m just hoping you feel the same.”
With the smile of your own you grinned back. “I’ve never felt so sure Ms.President.”
With a giggle of her own she wrapped her arms around your neck and brought you down for a long awaited kiss. Now these lips were soft. These were the lips she had been dreaming about. The feeling that had been absent were now there and going crazy. Just like she had wanted.
“I FUCKING KNEW IT!!” Amber yelled. There had been no way she found a boy attractive. Especially since she had the biggest crush on her best friends sister. But that wasn’t relevant.
:)
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Text
⭐NSFW Alphabet with Lucifer Morningstar
Good old NSFW Alphabet with our favourite duck man. Grab some snacks and a beverage, get comfy and enjoy <3
Template can be found here
~1.4k words
GN! Reader, mentions of makeup
Content Warning: NSFW, not proof read
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
He’s attentive to your needs. The literal king of aftercare, whatever you want he can provide. A bath? You got it. Cuddles? A snack? A walk in the garden? Hell, more sex? You got it!  
B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
He likes his tongue, plain and simple. The power he has over you with it is his favourite thing. Watching how you squirm just because of this one part of him, he’s ready to blow a load just thinking about it! You on the other hand, oh he’s tied between your thighs and your chest. The way your legs shake just that little bit when he’s doing something right? Or the way your chest HEAVES after you cum? It’s too good! 
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Would eat your cum breakfast, lunch and dinner if given the chance. And trust, he’s tried to do that on multiple occasions. You stop him, saying something about having a “balanced diet” whatever that means…  
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Lucifer fantasizes about you riding him during a meeting. He’s caught himself thinking about you sitting on his lap, while he’s on the throne, bouncing up and down restlessly like your soul depends on it. He’ll sit and envision what everyone else’s reaction would be, although he isn’t the biggest fan of sharing so maybe this will have to stay a fantasy…until he can learn to hold that many clones of himself that is (;
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
This man has been around since before the creation of humanity, over 10,000 years! At least 8,000 of those years having sex with either Lilith or Eve. So yes, Lucifer knows what he’s doing, and he knows he knows that he’s good at it. It’s named ‘The devil’s tango’ for a reason ya’ll. 
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Spooning or really anything where all of him is pressed into all of you. He just wants to hold you, whatever position that may be. He may be sexy but he is still damaged, and this is vulnerable. Just let him lay all his lovin on you ok? 
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Depends heavily on the foreplay, but on average he’ll start a lil goofy and turn more serious as the act goes on. But always be ready for a wayward joke here and there. Sometimes it’s just too good to pass up! (just like how having sex with you is too good to pass up)
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
He’s kept himself surprisingly well-groomed after his seven-year isolation. It’s trim and orderly the first time you see it, though it doesn’t matter that much because it’s such a pale blonde, that it’s basically invisible.  
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
My God, this man is bursting at the seams with love for you. His heart swells so much that it starts to hurt when he thinks about how he gets to participate in such a vulnerable and personal thing like sex with you. The most hated being in creation and you willing run into his trap, arms open and ready to envelop him in pleasure. Even if you can’t see it in his face or his words during the moment, he is always just so thankful that you could love him like this. 
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
At least once a day. He can’t help himself, plus he doesn’t have much going on most days sooo why not? No one’s stopping him, well you might but that's just cause you would rather help him than let him do it on his own.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
It is Lucifer, he’s got the words ‘corruption kink’ written on his goddamn head. (attached to the neck or the shaft, dealer’s choice) Like dirty talk is a lot of ‘What would your Father Even think of you now? On your knees for me? Hm? Darling, I can’t hear you~’. They want him to be the antichrist? Fine. Spread your legs and give him until the sun rises and he’ll show just how cruel he can be. 
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
His Throne, it’s the one place where he knows that no other person could even sit, let alone have sex on. This is the Sin of Pride, of course, his favourite place is centred around his power. 
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
When you call him yours, my king, my love, my slut. The little choice in wording that shows that you understand just how much of his heart you own, and that is all of it by the way. 
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
While you’ve never done this because you understand, it turns him off real quick if you bring up his past love, Lilith. They’ve been divorced for years and he’s moved on but still, it rubs him the wrong way if you were to ask if ‘Lilith could fuck you like this, if she could love you like this or make you moan the way I do?’ Just No.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
10s 10s 10s all across the board! 
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Again, depends on the foreplay but also how his depression is. If he is slipping into or is in another episode than its all sweet nothings, slow and romantic. If not than he’s more willing to go as fast as your body can handle. 
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Lucifer rathers to not have quickies but it happens. To him, it feels like he can’t make sure that you’re both getting what you want and he’d rather sell his soul to Alastor than leave you unsatisfied because of a goddamn time constraint. 
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
He may be skeptical but he’ll try it. You got to try to know if you’ll like it. Plus you got quite the funny story from failed attempts at some things but that's part of the fun aint it?
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
He’s the Devil from the Bible! Lucifer is quite literally otherworldly, his stamina doesn’t run out, it’s allllllll on how long you hold on for, baby. 
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Not the biggest fan of toys but if your adamant, he’ll give them a go again. Although ropes will always be on the table for him (;
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
A constant tease! All day, every day honey. He thrives when teasing you but as soon as the tables turn he is melting like that! That being said, he’s learnt to be careful with how much he teases you, least he want a repeat of that day at that gala, and seeing as Ozzie still makes fun of him for it, he’d rather not. 
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
His bedroom is soundproof. That’s explanation enough.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
He loves it when you leave markings on him, scratches, bites, hickeys or d) all of the above. Don’t get him started on when your lipstick stains his face or clothes. Minimum 30% of all of his shirts have a crisp kiss mark on the collar and Lucifer wouldn’t have it any other way.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Matches the rest of him pretty well, on the thin side as well as a blinding white colour while hitting a comfortable 7.8 inches. He knows exactly how to use it too. No wonder Lilith felt like That Bitch. 
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Need it being said? His sex drives rivals that of Angel Dust. Don’t start something you can’t finish.  
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
If the two of you aren’t cuddling then he doesn’t fall asleep until it’s almost sunrise. If you do snuggle up on him then it’s lights out real quick. That mix of sex, your shampoo and your body against his is his ultimate melatonin. 
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It's me. hi i'm the problem it's me (aka here's another installment of Simon Riley's being...Simon Riley)
Dinner Party (gone wrong) edition
He will help you cook, mainly because he's jealous of the literal task of cooking for getting more attention than him for the past five hours- does he know what he's doing? No. But he does his best and lord knows he can and will happily follow orders.
Cleaning? he may seem a bit disgruntled at first but he will stand on the dining room table to clean the lights, and he'll clean the baseboards even though he keeps telling you no one is going to look at them-
Loves watching you cook, or more of he loves watching you do something you enjoy, you could be gardening, writing, reading, sewing- he loves seeing the shine in your eyes- so he does stare, not in a super creepy way but it catches your attention
"I can feel you staring at me."
"An?"
"And you're freakin me out-Oh! Since you're here can you go get the nice wine from the basement?"
"Got it, boss."
He tastes tests everything, it's an excuse to put his hands on you to keep himself still for a moment so therefore he is very eager to do so
As much as he 'loves' PDA (aka he tolerates it) around your supposed friends you've been so desperate to impress for the past two weeks, he can't stomach the idea of giving you any more than an awkward side hug in their presence
Dead stare? yeah, he stares at them from across the table, utterly baffled out they can outright judge your amazing cooking because like??? a free meal?
'It's overcooked' your ass is overcooked Jenni.
Yet he was shocked? you were just taking the harsh words and backhanded compliments with a smile and nod. You were better than him, he would've made some snarky remark already
"Your house is...so cozy." "The decor is very retro."
"Maxmilist but...not? I love it." "Mm, very seasoned."
"It's so... it's so you."
You were taking it, laughing it off and squeezing his hand every time he made any motion or even gave a look like he may snap back at them.
"I think...I think I did good steak- the steak is good right?" You whisper as you grab the wine from the rack in the kitchen- which he technically didn't have to follow you but it was probably for the better that he did. Tears stung your eyes and you were doing your best to breathe and not let a sound escape.
"I thought it was amazing, it was amazing-hey-baby," he grabbed your shoulders to keep you from going back and then very carefully moved to wipe the tear from your cheek, "Baby, how about we kick em out an' then we watch tha' movie in the theatre? I'll make them go away...do you want me to make them go away?"
"That-it would be so mean."
"Do you want them gone?"
It took two words to make the prestige get up out of the seats, 'get out.' however he would tell you he was very polite and told them you weren't feeling well suddenly, and they were very understanding.
He told you to not change, after all you were already dressed up as if for a date and so was he so it worked perfectly.
Sure the movie you chose was a reshowing of a 90's chickflic but he would take your laughter over anything else in the world-
and yeah he did all of the dishes because he felt like when you got home the only thing you needed todo was go to sleep and rest
Next time he would just have the boys come over (after a long lecture on manners for Johnny, will make that man sit through an online dinner manner course thingy)
(annnyway thats it <33 I love comments and feedback!)
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theemporium · 2 days
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Mai Tai with Frat NicoJack 🥹 promt 23 please xx
thank you for requesting!🫶🏽
23. carrying the other in their arms
.
You hadn’t planned to get this drunk.
There was always the risk that you were going to get shit-faced drunk because Trevor was nothing if not an enabler, and he was fucking dangerous when he had a few drinks in him. He could persuade anybody to do anything, he was just charming that way. But the important point was that it was not planned. 
However, both Nico and Jack had a pretty good idea where the night was going when you had mentioned that Trevor wanted you to join him at some line dancing club across town that nobody else wanted to join him at. 
So, honestly, it was no surprise when they had received a variety of incoherent messages from you throughout the night. Both of the boys had been quite amused, both tucked under the covers as they watched some random hockey game that was playing for a chill night in. 
They had not expected a call somewhere past midnight. And they had not expected it to be from Trevor.
“No, she’s—” There was a fit of giggles before the boy continued. “She’s sooooo drunk right now and she wants you two. Like, she’s literally refusing to get off the sidewalk right now.” 
And Trevor was right. By the time both boys had made it down to Nico’s car and driven across town, they found the two of you sitting on the side of the road outside the bar. Country music was playing from inside, laughs and cheers and singing could be heard too. But you were lost in your own world, your head resting on Trevor’s shoulder as he rambled away about god-knows-what.
“There’s our girl,” Jack teasingly called out once they got out of the car, making their way over. His smile widened a little when he watched you lift your head up, your face brightening at the sight of your boys. 
“Jacky baby,” you grinned widely, blinking slowly. “You came.” 
“We both did,” Nico smiled softly as he kneeled down in front of you, pushing some hair out of your face. “How are you feeling, baby?” 
“Soooo good,” you giggled. “Trev bought me a bunch of drinks.”
“I am a gentleman,” Trevor replied, puffing his chest out a little and sending you into another fit of giggles. 
Nico shook his head but his expression was fond. He turned to look at Trevor, his brows raised. “You coming home too?” 
“Pffft, as if!” You snorted before leaning in, attempting—and failing—to whisper to your boyfriend as you said, “he was talking to a cute guy in there. He is soooo going home with him.” 
Jack grinned. “Oh yeah?”
“Mhmm,” you nodded before placing your finger on your lips. “Shhh, don’t tell Trevor I told you.”
“You are so drunk,” Trevor laughed, shaking his head in amusement. “You got her?” 
“We can handle her,” Nico assured Trevor with a nod, patting his shoulder. “Go enjoy the rest of the night.”
Trevor smirked as he began making his way back into the bar. “Good luck with Mrs P!” 
“Hey,I’m fine!” You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “Look! I can even walk by myself!” 
However, it took less than a second for you to quickly disprove your own claim. You were wobbling even before you could stand up straight on both feet, but thankfully, both boys managed to reach for you. 
“My knights in shining armour,” you laughed as you sunk into their touch. “M’tired. Carry me?” 
Jack raised his brows, trying to hold back his laugh as you flashed them both your puppy dog eyes. “Which one?” 
“You’re both my boyfriends,” you huffed. “Why can you both not carry me?”
“That doesn’t feel effective, schatz,” Nico murmured with a smile, squeezing your arm a little. “How about a deal, hm? One of us will carry you to the car right now and the other will carry you into the house.”
A smile broke out on your face. “Deal!” You turned to face Jack, batting your eyelashes. “Carry me?”
“Course, babe,” Jack smiled, wasting no time as he hooked his arms under your legs and lifted you in his arms. “Had a fun night, pretty girl?”
“So much fun,” you grinned, nuzzling your head into the crook of his neck. “Need to go there with you two. Wanna dance with you both.”
“We’ll see how you feel in the morning first,” Nico mused, opening the door to the backseat so you and Jack could climb in. 
“I won’t even be hungover, just you wait and see,” you grumbled to your boyfriend, your eyes already starting to flutter shut. 
“We’ll see,” Jack snorted, pressing a kiss to your forehead.
.
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ickie · 1 day
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♡ missed signals \ cl16.
pairing: charles leclerc x reader summary: best friends who have feelings for each other !! scary !! \ word count: 1.1k warnings: there's like 2 sentences of steam but they literally just make out idk ! if u don't like cheesy men or reader being oblivious ... this will not be 4 u !notes: i wrote this because i cannot sleep so if it makes no sense... blame the lack of sleep not me ! feel free to leave any feedback here !
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your fingernails dug into the plam of your hand, eyebrows creasing together as you stared at your best friend, the person that you would sacrifice anything for... hell, the person that you would go to jail for. you coud pinpoint the exact day things began to change, and that was the day that you friendship with charles had begun to turn into something far from platonic.
it was barley a year ago, you and charles had decided to go to a party, and maybe it was a bad idea when charles had been insisting that he needed the time to recouperate... but what better way to recouperate than with some alcohol and some quality time with friends and strangers alike?
♡♡♡
your hands had begun to get cold from the condensation that was forming on the outside of your glass, a pout taking over your glossed lips. "charlie," you drew out the last syllable, standing on your tiptoes so that he could maybe hear you over the music. "i'm bored." you hummed, head turning to the side as you stared him down.
"and what am i supposed to do about that, mon loulou?" he questioned back, raising an amused eyebrow at you as your shoulders shrugged at the taller male. "can we dance, do something please! i'm dying over here!" your dramatics didn't go unnoticed, charles letting out a laugh at your actions.
his hand grabbed yours, pulling you towards the crowded dance floor. your hips swayed easily to the music, the feeling of charles behind you wasn't foreign. it wasn't weird for best friends to be grinding on each other in the middle of a dance floor, right? because for you and charles, it definitely wasn't. the feeling of his hands on your waist caused you to throw your head back, resting it on his shoulder as the two of you danced until your boredom was somewhat satiated.
shortly after, though, you began to feel overheated - the alcohol you had consumed too quickly hitting you like a ton of bricks. "charlie," his nickname came out like a whimper, your cheeks flushing. "i'm hot, can we go outside, please?" you asked the question as you were already moving away from him, eyeing the door that led to a balcony.
you let out a relieved sigh as the cooler air hit your sweaty skin, hands coming up to run through your hair. "i dunno what happened," you laughed, leaning against the railing. "i was fine and then i got hot, and not in a good way..." you joked as charles slotted himself next to you, your head resting on his shoulders. your eyes closed, listening to him speak as you hummed out responses, only half way listening.
one thing led to another, and you found your lips on charles', you hands in his hair and his hands placed firmly on your hips, not letting you move away - not like you wanted to. the feeling of his lips against yours was something you hadn't really thought of before, but... they were something unlike any one else you had ever kissed. they were soft, gentle... and all you knew in that moment was that you wanted to keep kissing the boy you had considered your best friend.
charles pulled away though, a bit too soon for your liking as you let out a whine of protest. "i," he bit his lip, eyes flickering from your eyes to your lips and back to your eyes. you tried to decipher what emotion he was feeling, but his face was eerily empty. "we should go back inside." he stepped away from you, shoving his hands into his pockets. you stayed quiet, eyes finding the floor as you nodded your head. what the fuck just happened?
as soon as you got inside, you ordered yourself an uber, saying your goodbyes to your (very tipsy) friends who had tried to get you to stay longer, but you made up something about not feeling good, not like it was a lie, though. the feeling of regret, the feeling of unwantedness... it had you feeling sick to your stomach.
♡♡♡
"you wanted me to take that as a sign you had feeling for me?" the quesiton came out before you could stop it, a hand slapping over your mouth as you laughed. "you ran away from me, charles!"
"i was... embarassed, okay?" one of his hands came up and scratched the back of his neck. "i didn't want my first time kissing you to be on the balcony at some club, mon ange. it should've been something more important than that. but you really didn't think anything was different after vegas?"
♡♡♡
what happens in vegas, stays in vegas? or at least that's what they said... and that's what you told yourself as you led charles to your hotel room feeling the urge to congratulate him for making the podium.
his lips were on your neck as soon as the door was shut, your back snugly pushed against the wall. a whimper passed through your lips as his teeth grazed a sensitive spot, your hands pulling at whatever they could find purchase on.
"charlie, i need more..."
"oh, mon ange, you're going to get plenty."
♡♡♡
thinking back on the memory of vegas, you felt heat creep up into your chest and your cheeks. did you really miss these signs of charles trying to make moves on you..? there's no way, right? "what happens in vegas stays in vegas!" you counter, holding your hands up in defense.
"mon ange." he deadpans, a look of are you dumb? crossing his features.
"okay, okay... maybe i should've looked more into it but you know how i am!" you step closer to him, a hand reaching out to graze at his forearm. "but, charlie... if you really wanted to be with me you should've just told me..." you let out a giggle, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "or, i dunno, asked me on a date? or just plain asked me out?" there's a teasing edge to your tone, a smile pulling at your lips.
"i'm not doing that," he scoffs, his hands pulling at your waist to pull you close to him. "you're mine, mon ange... you might not have realized it, but, it's gonna be me and you for however long your willing to deal with me." he leans down to kiss you, but you reach a hand up to stop him.
"that was the cheesiest shit i've ever heard, charles." you make a mock disgusted face before dropping your hand. "but, you can kiss me now, if you'd like.."
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coryosmin · 2 days
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politician coryo just spoiling you so you go on some lingerie shopping and when you show it to him + doing a 360 twirl and coryo just bends her over and literally dumb fucks her idk if should be a blurb or one shot but it all up to u
nsfw | mdni
imagine coryo just giving you his card before he goes to work for the day, telling you to spend the day shopping for whatever your heart desires and to put on a lil show for him when he gets home. so that’s exactly what you do. you go all out too.
you bought yourself some cute outfits, new shoes, makeup, etc. but your favorite part? buying yourself beautiful lingerie sets that you know coryo would adore on you wholeheartedly. so when coryo came home after a long day of spreading his political agenda, he came home to you sat in the living room wearing a crimson red sheer lingerie dress that showed the matching bra and panties underneath it while wearing a pair of crimson red heels to match. you were truly a sight to behold.
“did you buy this today?” coryo asked as he leaned against the doorway of the living room, his head resting on the doorframe.
you looked up from the book you had in your lap to look at your wonderful husband. you smiled, closing the book and standing up. “i did,” you said. you walked over to coryo while doing a cute little spin to show him the set. “do you like it?” you asked as you reached him, grabbing his hands.
coryo looked you up and down, smirking. “you look absolutely ravishing, my sweetheart,” he exclaimed, pulling you to him. he put a finger underneath your chin, guiding your face so he could kiss your lips softly but sensually.
it didn’t take long until you were pressed up against the wall of the living room, your front to the wall as you were bent over with your panties to the side as coryo thrusted into you hard and fast. his movements were frantic, clearly signaling his need for you and letting out the frustrations of the day.
you moaned loudly as coryo fucked your cunt. with each thrust of his cock, he hit your spongy spot so hard and good, just as you love it. “you look so beautiful taking my cock, darling,” coryo said shakily. “taking me so well.”
you nodded your head in response, eyes rolling to the back of your head. “feels so good, coryo,” you whined, pressing your hands up against the wall.
“yeah? you feel so good,” coryo replied, giving you a particularly harsh thrust. coryo groaned at the sensation, feeling your cunt tighten around his cock.
“oh fuck!” you moaned. you couldn’t think about anything else or formulate any other words in this moment. the only thing on your mind is coryo’s cock and how good it’s making you feel. and without any warning, you came hard around coryo’s cock.
coryo moaned as he felt you cumming on his cock, his own release hitting him as well. he spilled his seed inside of you, filling you up before pulling out and putting your panties back to wear they belong.
“keep these on until we get to bed tonight,” coryo explained breathlessly. “gonna fuck you again later.”
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cauliplea · 1 day
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it baffles me how many people twist the whole "Ratio hates idiots" thing even though it's literally anything but that.
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did people not even read the character details? he doesn't hate idiots necessarily, it goes deeper than that. but for some reason people immediately think that Ratio would hate someone because they are less smarter that him.
No, he does not hate people with less knowledge, he hates people that doesn't try to gain more knowledge and better themselves, he hates people that think they are better than others simply because they are smarter, he only hates people that choose to stay ignorant.
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the amount of ableism he recieves when it comes to his entire character makes me want to rip my hair out, no he would not hate you because you're bad at math, he'd recognize if you had any other talents other than math and praise you for it and try to help, no he wouldn't hate aventurine because you people think Aventurine is an idiot in his standarts (I'll get to this later)
he is a big softie yet it is always ignored just because he was rude to most of the characters we have seen which if you took two seconds to think about it's justified.
Herta, Screwllum and Ruan Mei are all part of genius society and they all share one personality trait which is being self-centered and that's what ratio hates the MOST. he doesn't like people that only care about themselves, so how could anyone think that someone that hates selfishness be selfish?
I do love herta, Screwllum and Ruan Mei but you have to agree they are selfish when it comes to their goal, all of genius society is, they all do things for themselves and not others unlike Ratio, which is a common theme since you can notice Nous only recognizing people that seek knowledge for themselves and not others like Ratio.
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When it comes to his relationship with Aventurine I'm glad people can recognize that he cares enough but there are still times where he's seen as cold hearted which is not true at all, this man is direct with what he feels whether it's care or hate, he didn't hesitate to call Sunday crazy and he wouldn't hesitate to show aventurine that he cares which he already does, just in his own confusing way.
I've also seen people call aventurine an idiot which I can't stand, how could you even muster up that idea? he is intelligent, Ratio literally sees him as an equal which could be another hard evidence on how he doesn't hate "Idiots" (since people think Aventurine qualifies as one because he couldn't go to school or learn academically. :|) he recognizes Aventurines talent and intelligence, the times he calls aventurine a fool or anything else is obviously affectionate and lighthearted.
the first scene they were on screen together the reason he insulted Aventurines knowledge he apologized afterwards when he realized that it wasn't Aventurines fault. (deleting the racism part because I've had MULTIPLE people bring up the fact that it was an act and I get it but I still dont think it was necessary since you don't have to be racist to make someone think you hate someone else.)
so no, Ratio isn't a cold hearted, mean asshole, he's lovely so please write him as lovely. it breaks my heart and hurts my autism when people mischaracterize him.
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sunflower-lilac42 · 3 days
Note
Hii!! Happy 6 months! Love ur work <3
Could I pls request any ‘🐻’ for pookie bear Luke Hughes?
Much love :))
hi my love! thank you so much :)
also if someone wants to request this prompt with someone else you totally should bc i have another idea 🧍🏻‍♀️
this is the prompt i have chosen -> “Why do you keep doing this—” “Because I’m trying to prove to you that you are loved.” 
tw: feelings of not being good enough, allusions to past relationships (bad)
luke was always the kind of guy to shower his girl in love and gifts and literally everything. she was his person and he loved her so much. which is why it broke his heart every time her eyes watered with emotion when he gave her something unexpected.
she hadn’t experienced any of this. any of the plethora of compliments, the endless flowers, the endless gifts, no one had ever done that for her. it surprised her every time luke did it, even if it was just as simple as him whispering “you’re gorgeous” in her ear before going to bed.
recently, it has gotten worse. she ran into her ex when she and been visiting luke over spring break. she had briefly forgotten about his commitment to a nearby school. she was at the bookstore down the street from luke’s apartment, looking for the new book that had just released, when he tapped her on the shoulder.
she freaked out, eyes widening as she tried to find a way out of the situation. when she returned to luke's apartment he could tell there was something off about her. so, he started making sure he was doing everything in his power to make her feel better. he didn't have to know what was said, what had happened. all he had to know was that something upset his girl and he was going to do as much as he could to make it right.
y/n was concerned about the amount luke had been spending, about this new found obsession with doing everything and anything for her. not that she wasn't used to him doing this, but this. this was new.
it had been about five days since she had seen her ex, things had gone slightly back to normal for her at least. luke on the other hand, was not. she was supposed to go back yesterday but luke had begged her to stay another two days, at least. she sighed and gave in because she couldn't say no to him, especially when he had that pout.
this would now be the fifth day of luke bombarding y/n with gifts. the first day was a bouquet of roses, the second day was a new lego set, the third day was him waking her up with breakfast in bed and starbucks, plus a trip to the bookstore she loved oh so dearly. and yesterday he had taken her to this little art shop where they got to paint random pieces of pottery that they made.
today was now a new adventure. he had asked her about two hours before their reservation to this restaurant she had been wanting to go to, "do you want to go out tonight? for dinner."
"luke, what is all of this?"
"what?" his voice was innocent.
"buying me things, taking me places. why do you keep doing this-"
"because i'm trying to prove to you that you are loved."
"what?"
"last week, when you came back from the store. you were sad and you looked like how you did when we started dating. like you were trying to convince yourself that you deserved this."
"i don't know what you are talking about."
he grabbed her arm and pulled her into her so their chests were flushed with one another. she blushed as she peered up at him, "luke."
"i don't know what happened with your ex okay? i love you and you deserve that. you deserved to have everything, okay? and i will give you everything if that's what it takes to make you believe that."
much like all the other times, her eyes began to water, "i love you too."
he kissed her forehead before sliding his hand down to tap her ass, "now go get ready."
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Charlie: “Whhhew...! That was-”
Vaggie: “A lot?”
Charlie: “-better than expected!”
Vaggie: “No kidding. If I’d known inviting your dad here would get Alastor looking like a wet cat, I’d’ve pushed for it sooner.”
Charlie: “I’m just glad you pushed when you did.” (smooch) “Thank you. I’ve missed him.”
Vaggie: “Looks like he’s really missed you too, babe.”
Charlie: “Mm. Not enough to call, though.”
Vaggie: “Ehh, calling can be scary. Good thing you’re plenty brave.”
Charlie: “Only when you’re holding my hand!”
Vaggie: “Husk would say that’s an act of fucking bravery all on it’s own, letting yourself get grabbed by the small, mean, grumpy lady. Remind me not to help him out at the bar again ever. I think there’s vodka in my hair.”
Charlie: “I’ll try, but you know you’re gonna help anyway.” (second smooch) “Can I get a ‘you’re welcome’?”
Vaggie: (chuckling) “Charlie, I didn’t do anything.”
Charlie: “You do lots.”
Vaggie: “And thank hell Angel Dust isn’t around to hear that…”
Charlie: “I’m serious! You got me to call dad in the first place!”
Vaggie: “I just suggested it, you’re the one who did it, and you two worked things out together like a real father-daughter team.”
Charlie: “And we’re a great team too.”
Vaggie: “Well I’m definitely a pretty big fan of us. Although…. Sir Pentious and Keekee are giving us a run for our money. And the Niffty plus a lock of Lucifer’s hair combo might just have us beat.”
Charlie: “Blegh! She actually got that in the end? I thought her scissors couldn’t even cut it!”
Vaggie: “They didn’t. She used my spear.”
Charlie: “She WHAT-”
Vaggie: “And asked your dad very nicely to please take off his hat so she could trim off a piece without ruining the rest of his hair.”
Charlie: (sigh) “I guess as long as she ASKED…”
Vaggie: “D’you think her whole room is just a shrine to quote unquote bad boys?”
Charlie: “Oh don’t say that. We need to introduce her to some boybands or something.”
Vaggie: “We?”
Charlie: “Yes ‘we’, little miss likes making lesbian covers of the songs normally sung by teenage boys while you’re in the shower and think the sound of running water can in any way drown out your beautiful, heart stopping voice-”
Vaggie: “I- you- You’ve been listening!?”
Charlie: “Eeeev-er-y morning yep! Heheh~”
Vaggie: “Diablo mio… I need a drink.”
Charlie: (giggling) “To go with the vodka hair?” (nibbles Vaggie’s fringe) “Nom nom nom. Delicious~”
Vaggie: “Scratch that- clearly WE need some SLEEP.”
Charlie: “How can I sleep at all tonight, though? Vaggie- we’re gonna get a meeting with the top angels of creation! We’re gonna be on cloud nine! Literally! In HEAVEN!!”
Vaggie: “And sleep won’t be enough to prepare me for that but you definitely need it.”
Charlie: “It’s impossible! I need to SING!!!!!”
Vaggie: “You need to go shuck off those shoes and get in your ruby slippers while I put in your fav movie so we can get some rest.”
Charlie: “If you put in the Wizard of Oz you know I’m 100% gonna sing anyway right.”
Vaggie: “Yeah, but you’ll be singing in bed so you can keep watching the movie, and that’s good enough for me.”
Charlie: “I love youuuu~”
Vaggie: “Love you too sweetie. Slippers. Bed. Z’s. Now.”
Charlie: (kicks off shoes) “Ta da! There’s no place like home!"
Charlie: (clicks hooves together)
Charlie: "Heheheheh...!”
Vaggie: “I meant on the bed in your pajamas and under the actual covers- vaya, whatever. Scoot. Don’t go running off to Oz without me.”
Charlie: (snuggling vaggie in a hug instead) “I’m never going anywhere without you, Vaggie. Including heaven.”
Vaggie: (awkward laugh) “Great…”
Charlie: “Wanna know whyyyy?”
Vaggie: (smiles) “I make a great hand-holder, apparently.”
Charlie: “Yes. And, you’re home.”
Vaggie: “….yeah? I’m here? This is our room?”
Charlie: (snorting) “Vaggie-”
Vaggie: “In our hotel??”
Charlie: “Vaggie nooo- Anywhere else would be home too, with you there.”
Vaggie: “…..”
Vaggie: (deep breath)
Vaggie: “…... Charlie-”
Charlie: “You gonna press play?”
Vaggie: “-huh? Oh. Yeah.”
Charlie: (snuggling her) “This has been an amazing day. Wish every day could be like this, forever.”
Vaggie: “Yeah.” (hoarse) (curling up as close to charlie as she can) "Me too.”
-101 minutes of Oz later-
Vaggie: "Charlie?"
Charlie: "... nnnoooo..."
Vaggie: "Charlie, c'mon, at least let's get your coat off."
Charlie: "Mmrrr... mi mi mi..."
Vaggie: "You can go 'snork mi mi mi' afterwards. Work with me here, Dorothy- I can't get you settled into Oz without help."
Charlie: "Hmmheheheh... so im Dorothy..?"
Vaggie: "Definitely. You've got the ruby slippers on and everything."
Charlie: "I love that you call my hooves that~ Thats so silly. You're so silly, Vaggie."
Vaggie: "And you're already half asleep. Suspenders next, okay?"
Charlie: "Remove the suspenders... delete the suspenders..."
Vaggie: "Get your horns tangled in the suspenders somehow, wait, hold on-"
Charlie: "SUSPEND the SUSPEDERS!"
Vaggie: "Alright, good enough. That's all the annoying stuff gone anyway. You should be good like that, right?"
Charlie: "Sleeeeeepy. Snuggles?"
Vaggie: "Snuggles right after I change, give me one sec okay."
Charlie: "Mmm."
Charlie: "...vaggie."
Vaggie: "That was half a second."
Charlie: "Vaggiiiiie."
Vaggie: "I'm right over here, stop making grabby hands."
Charlie: "Vaggggiiiiiiiee...!"
Vaggie: (huffs) "Fine, fine..." (snuggles) "Not like my nightie would cover much anyway. But if we end up having to get up in the middle of the night for something exploding again, you're going out first, and I'm stealing your jacket."
Charlie: "You look good in my clothes."
Vaggie: "I look like a ten year old. The sleeves have to be rolled back to the elbow just so I have hands."
Charlie: "I like your hands..."
Vaggie: "Thanks." (kiss) "Go to sleep, Charlie."
Charlie: "Wait- heheheh- wait, Vaggie-"
Vaggie: "What?"
Charlie: "Vaggie, Vaggieeee~!"
Vaggie: "Giggling into my boobs isn't helping me understand what you're saying, babe."
Charlie: "Vaggie. If I'm Dorothy, and youuuu are GAY, then.."
Vaggie: "Little scared to see where this is going, not gonna lie."
Charlie: "Does that make-" (snickers) "Does that make you a girlfriend of Dorothy's?"
Vaggie: "............."
Charlie: "Vaggie~?"
Vaggie: "...Charlie. Please."
Vaggie: "Go the fuck to sleep."
Charlie: "HEH!"
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vclwb · 2 days
Text
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it’s finally here!!! this is my first ever fic, it’s kinda short but i hope you guys enjoy xx
✩ ROAD TRIP - hamzahthefantastic x reader (nsfw)
you and your boyfriends spontaneous road trip to escape toronto ends up in disaster.
….
you close the trunk of your car and let out a loud sigh.
“can we please get something to eat before we leave? im starving..”
hamzah holds up one finger and begins digging through his bag. “i have something even better”
he pulls out two breakfast burritos wrapped in foil. “i put extra hot sauce in yours” as he grins and hands it to you.
holding back a smile you grab yours, he really enjoys taking care of you and that’s what you love about him.
….
it’s been about 20 minutes since you two have been on the road, hamzah mentioned stopping at a gas station before getting any farther to fill up and get some snacks for later.
“how many monsters should i grab?” you ask him as he’s filling the tank of the car
“just two for now” he says as hes watching the price slowly go up on the pump, “the pink ones pretty please”
“yeah, yeah i know!” you wave as you walk away from him and towards the entrance
hamzah directs his attention towards you, taking you in from the behind. even thought you were wearing sweats he could care less. it had been weeks since the two of you got to spend time together because of how crazy work was getting for the both of you. he brought up going on a trip the night before when you two were getting ready for bed.
….
“let’s go do something babe” you barely makeout as you hear him brushing his teeth in the bathroom a door down from your bedroom
“like what? there’s not much to do around here besides bar hopping” you say as you pull over the thick quilt making yourself comfortable in bed
“i mean really go somewhere, get out of toronto for a bit, just you and me” he says leaning against the door frame of your bedroom smiling
….
the entrance to the gas station rings as hamzah walks in, you’ve been scanning the snack aisle for a few minutes now, not noticing he had entered.
he glances over at you only to find you occupied choosing between hot fries or regular cheetos
he then walks up to the cashier pointing at the boxes behind him, “can i just get a pack of those please.” he says as quiet as possible.
the cashier grabs the golden package with a trojan symbol on the side and sets it on the counter, “anything else?” he asked in a monotone voice, “no that should be it.”
after finally deciding on hot fries, you begin to walk over to the counter where hamzah is standing
“wait, and just these three things as well” you say as you set your drinks and snacks onto the counter.
hamzah was able to quickly hide the box in his pocket before you could notice, not realizing you can see the already scanned items on the card reader screen.
‘Trojan Ultra Thin Condoms 12 Pck’
you chose to ignore it, but it made your stomach flip.
both you and hamzah have had your fair share of relationships in the past and have experienced enough sexually. the farthest you’ve gotten with him was either giving or receiving head, or him slipping his fingers into your panties every once in a while if he was feeling bold. not once have you had sex.
“that’ll be 15.65”
hamzah puts in his card and tries to play it cool, fully thinking he had gotten away with keeping this purchase a secret from you. what is this boy planning?
once you two both made it back into the car, you practically had to beg hamzah for the aux
“my playlist is literally fire what are you talking about!”
“im just saying i have the best music taste in this relationship so i should be on aux” hamzah blurts as he’s scrolling through his spotify
you grab his phone mid scroll and he stares at you in shock
“who says i don’t have good music taste?” you grin as you press play on one of your playlists after you had lurked through his following
brent faiyaz, frank ocean, and the weeknd were the three that played the most in the span of 4 hours.
hamzah steadily fixed onto the road ahead of him didn’t notice you had fallen asleep.
….
“hey, wake up” you hear your boyfriend say as he gently shakes you awake
“hmm?”
you rub your eyes and finally focus on hamzahs face, he looks worried.
“how long was i out for?” you say as you look through the window. it’s dusk already and the car is fully parked on the side of the road.
“hamzah what’s going on?”
“i have no idea but my car is all fucked up and it wont start now,” he says in a concerned tone “i heard a funny noise coming from the engine so i decided to pull over to check it out and..” he looked around the car for an answer, “im so sorry babe.”
you put your hand over his, “this isn’t your fault at all” you say as you begin to caress the back of it.
hamzah turns to meet your eyes, then gazes down quickly at your lips.
he clears his throat, “uhm- maybe i should call triple a..”
you noticed how nervous he was getting, so you decided to cut right to the chase.
“so what about the condoms?”
hamzah looks at you shocked, “shit, you saw that?” he scratches the back of his head “god that’s hella embarrassing..”
“extremely far from embarrassing actually” you say slowly as you trail up his arm and begin massaging his bicep.
jesus christ he is buff.
hamzah looks to you for reassurance “are you sure?”
“positive.”
you trail down to his chest, you tug at the bottom of his sweatshirt he’s wearing and he pulls it off almost immediately.
“impatient much?” you smirk
he scoffs at you and then leans in for a kiss. starting off innocently, quickly began turning into sloppy and wet kisses trailing down your neck
“hamzah-“
“mm?” you felt him say as he continued kissing, his hot breath against your skin turning you on alone
“lets move to the back”
….
his large hands grip the sides of your face as he pulls you in for more. at this point, your straddling his lap in the backseat. you can feel how hard he is already and you let out a slight whine “i need you” you gasp in between kisses “please.”
you didn’t have to tell him twice. he quickly pulls off your sweatshirt and slides of your sweatpants.
he slides your panties to side and slips two fingers in almost immediately. the only thing is he keep his eyes locked onto your face, his mouth slowing agape getting turned on just from the way you squirm from his touch.
you almost reach your orgasm, practically moving into his fingers. hamzah chuckles as he quickly pulls out.
“what the hell?”
“i’m not done with you just yet”
….
at this point your laying on the backseats, completely naked, as you watch hamzah strip off his pants.
he leans over to the glove box and grabs the pack of condoms, slowly rolling one on. you watch with anticipation, hamzah then looks up at you “and your the one calling me impatient.”
he lines himself up with your entrance, lightly grazing a thumb over your clit making your hips jerk
he starts off slow as you begin to get used to his size, your walls stretching around him. he leans over you and begins trailing kisses down your neck, leaving a few marks here and there. as his pace begins to speed you hear his groans get louder.
“shit.” you hear him mutter into the side of your neck
hamzah was never too crazy with dirty talk, but he was extremely vocal when he felt good.
the groans slowly falling into moans and load whimpers, you could tell he was close. he had been going so fast at this point every thrust began feeling deeper and deeper.
“holy fuck-“ you were almost at the edge and so was hamzah. you felt your hips buck at the final thrust, you him watched as he slowly rode out his high as he held your waist.
he leaned in for a soft kiss after you two had settled, “how long have you been waiting to do that?” you ask looking up at him seeing how his curls perfectly framed his face
“you have no idea.”
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ronearoundblindly · 2 days
Text
Dirty Water
Steve Rogers x deep sea mermaid!Reader
Prompt from this dirty ask game with our pairing from the Sun, Salt, and Shield series.
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Summary: After a very long (but unofficial) courtship, where Steve is too shy to bring up your anatomy and his compatibility, a cultural misinterpretation quite literally sinks his resolve.
Warnings for smut (I'm gonna have to call this what it is and just say it's monster-f**king, or the one where Steeb gets maybe-CNC-boinked by a 'monster.' Sorry, babes. Ro's dipped a toe into the darkside for a smidge.) MINORS DNI. Poorly--or rather, not--edited and I have no idea the word count...
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Steve swallows harshly and tries not to nervously splash his feet in the pool.
"What?" he chokes out.
He can't think of anything more articulate to say, not that it would matter when so much is lost in translation.
All you did was ask about the singing outside the doors of your 'room'--the retrofitted gym pool at the Avengers compound, the one is the basement without windows for your highly sensitive eyes--but he...could never have predicted why you were so curious.
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"They're just enjoying themselves," he'd chuckled, shrugging like it was no big deal. "Do you sing?"
The look on your face, jaw slack and head tilting in contemplation, it should have warned him. You unfurled from your relaxed posture, the stance where your arms cross behind your back and fit atop the swell of your--he'd say tail, but it's more like your ass--rump, the rest of your body bent in a curve until your fin nearly touches the surface, and inched closer to his feet in the deep end.
"Yessssss," you hissed slowly through three rows of sharp teeth, crawling up his legs, out of the water, dripping over his lap as you braced large, webbed hands on either side of his hips.
Even in the very low light of damp room, he could see the lavender of your stare drop to his crotch.
"You sing too?"
Steve's an idiot. He didn't understand yet, so that dumbass actually began humming 'You Are My Sunshine' because nothing else occurred to him.
Then he noticed your tail glowing beneath the scales.
Then he realized you were pressing yourself to his legs.
Aaaand then Steve Rogers looked down your body to witness his knee disappearing in a spongy spot where the armoring swelled apart.
Oh god.
"What?" he now asks like an frightened teen seeing boobs for the first time.
"I make you sing?" Your broad green lips turn up in a smile. "Show me."
Suddenly, Steve's forgotten more english than you've learned. "Huh?"
Your flowing, textured hair, shapely even out of the water, sways when you cock your head to the side, looking through your lashes at him.
"How Stevie sing?"
He shivers for the first time in the cool water and lets an involuntary grunt leave his lips.
He's tried to stop himself from imagining your body and how it works to...ya know, and how he might...oh god, he's going to hell, but apparently, you've already been imagining that humans are either masturbating or fucking outside your door at all hours all the time--
--and oh shit, that means you sing as a part of sex.
He turns his head to the almost black ceiling and fails to think of anything else as the light from your body reflects in waves on every wall. He whimpers when he feels a ripple of muscle through the wet cotton of his jeans.
"Doll make Stevie sing?" Your voice is hoarse, and just as quickly as you say that by his throat, you flip back into the water. You can only breathe air for so long without hurting your throat and lungs.
He thinks he's off the hook, praying the tightness in his pants dissipates faster than they'll take to dry, but he lowers his head to find you peeking from the water, intent as ever on learning his ways.
He should be ashamed, so very fucking ashamed, of how badly he wants to take himself out of his pants and watch the wonder of those pretty eyes as he comes at the thought of you, but Steve's drowning in the hope that he can have you. It's been so long that he's wanted this, even in the most innocent ways.
Your final plea bubbles to the surface.
"Show?"
Steve inhales sharply, running a hand through his hair and licking his lips.
This is wrong, he thinks. You should not be doing this.
Yet he does it anyway because he wants to; he wants to so badly.
He sits up straight at the edge of the concrete, popping the button of his jeans and aches as he lowers the zipper. He can't meet your eye while he pulls out his semi-hard cock and fists it harshly.
You're so long that even looking away leaves your shimmering tail in sight, and he thinks he sees you rattle in excitement. It makes him shiver again, and the vibration shakes the moan escaping his tight chest.
Yikes, it does sound a bit like he's singing...
What the hell are you even doing?
Of course, he knows he's touching himself and he knows well enough how to do that, but he shouldn't be doing this in front of you, much less enjoying it. His blood is running so hot beneath his skin, though, the chilly pool feels soothing over his shins where he rolled up his pants (to no avail).
The heat floods his veins and mind to the point rational thought quiets, and Steve's eyes slither up your demure form.
Your eyes get wider and wider the more noise he makes, and his rampant imagination feeds off the sight of that gap in your scales visible as it undulates in the refraction beneath his feet.
He leans his head back and closes his own eyes at just the wrong moment.
Mid-whine, he misses the splashing sound that would have warned him you were coming, and instead Steve is pummeled by the end of your tail and topples into the pool, shocked and sputtering salty water until his body is pinned to the flat of the concrete wall he used to be perch on.
As he scrambles to toss his arms over the ledge, he feels claws dragging his jeans farther down his legs, and the fabric hangs like an anchor while the silky-slick webbing of your fingers glides up and down his thighs.
Then your tongue runs the length of his cock, making Steve moan embarrassingly loud and thrust his hips forward. If he weren't in the water, he'd be a puddle.
Pleasure races up and down his spine, fighting for dominance over the feeling of cold when he slips from the ledge and submerges briefly.
He barely registers the loss of your tongue and your quick lap of swimming before you're backing into him again.
It's on your ass, too, the soft entrance like you rubbed against his knee, but he could not have imagined what it could do--what you could do--how you could manipulate your muscles inside your tail.
He has no brainpower left to describe it. Steve just lets go, trusting your body to hold his weight as one hand grips the mossy softness of your waist and the other hand spreads over your lower back. Out of instinct, he tries to get leverage to push himself in and out of you, but that's useless.
There's a strong ripple of muscle that pulls him in, and in, and in, delicately tight on his sensitive cock and wide enough to slowly suck his balls into the massaging cavern.
Steve's eyes roll far into his head. He's going to pass out if this keeps up.
"Doll," he gasps, but it's too quiet in the slosh of the water. "Please, I'm--"
A clear, high note crescendos from the deep below, something disturbingly pure and paralyzing, and Steve can't move. He can only feel and experience a siren's song in action.
His body twitches violently before his cum is milked sensually, desperately, methodically from his cradled and ravaged pelvis, and never in Steve's long life has he ever been so fucking spent.
He whimpers when your cunt releases him, only faintly aware that he's propped on your back by his elbows as you swim to the shallow end and let him 'stand' on his shaky legs.
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The screeching hinge of the door startles him.
"Cap," the junior agent yells over your hiss from the bright light spraying in, "everything okay? I heard..."
Yeah, I couldn't describe it either, Steve thinks.
He spits water from his mouth. "Fine," he huffs back, "we were...singing, and I fell in."
"Oh. Alright. Sorry to disturb you, Miss G." The man nods his apology at your hand-covered eyes and leaves.
Steve can't help but laugh like an insane person, laying to properly float in the water, uncaring what you're up to until he gently hits the stairs leading out of the pool.
Your head rises out of the water hopefully, and he cups your cheeks, still chuckling. He has zero words to describe...anything at the moment, but he can show you a human tradition of affection in return.
Shifting as easily as a feather in the water, he pulls you two together and sweetly presses his salmon lips to your seaweed pout, letting your long locs fall over his own shoulders.
Soon, he's gasping for air again, yet just before you dunk below the surface, you grin and coo at him.
"Stevie sings lovely."
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[Main Masterlist; Dirty Asks Masterlist; Ko-Fi]
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what...the hell have i done. *hits post before final two braincells protest*
@fandom-has-taken-me-hostage @leah2901 @blogbog710 @supraveng @patzammit @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @yiiiikesmish @ashesofblackroses @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @brandycranby @buckysprettybaby @ellethespaceunicorn @late-to-the-party-81 @rogersbarber @bucky-fricking-barnes-reads @fallinallinmendes @jamneuromain
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onlyjaeyun · 3 days
Note
i’ve been following ur writing for some time now and i do have to agree with that anon who said you did CH dirty. you are a very talented writer so it’s just hard to watch.
you started off CH so strong with the lore and little chapters here and there but as it progressed you kind of just got lazy and it shows. when important events happened in the story, they weren’t conveyed through writing but through the texts (ie the riki and yn fight, that was definitely worth a written chapter) and it was honestly disappointing.
the ending isn’t much to say about either. yn and hoon barely go through development after the letter incident and all of a sudden they’re dating and married with a kid like two chapters later?
idk, if it was a mental health issue then i get that but even then you should’ve just gave it a break and thought everything out more. you could do so much better.
thank you for the feedback!
i wanna put you through the progess of a piece of writing from the POV of a writer okay? now keep in mind: i work two jobs, am a fulltime uni student and the daughter of an immigrant household with two parents who still work most of the day just so you know what else i have to deal with, besides my mental health okay?
now, i started off CH strong right? yes. i uploaded on the daily, fine i chose that. a chapter usually takes me around one hour if i actually sit down and focus on nothing but the chapter itself, which includes IG stories, editing, formatting etc. alright
on top of the daily chapters, i constantly replied to 40+ asks a day, a blessing in disguise because no matter how much i enjoy talking to you guys, the pressure does get worse the bigger that number of my inbox becomes, i hope this makes sense
now, i started CH back in october, right when my semester started, thats why i started off strong but as time went on, my assignments and private life got too busy and i guess i felt entitled enough as a writer to skip a few certain chaps and make life a little easier for me by making them regular chapters instead of written ones.
and this is gonna be my main point: i'm not a machine. i wrote a minimum of 5 THOUSAND words per written chapter, MINIMUM. we're talking about a 5-9 THOUSANDED worded chapter EACH WEEK. which usually took me about 6-7 hours, even allnighters.
yes, i chose to do that and maybe my time management wasn't the best but i had to create a compromise where i wouldnt have let you guys wait for over two months which would have resulted in me losing my motivation completely, and yet still focusing on EXAMS. because you know, i'm a fulltime uni student with TWO jobs 😮‍💨
if YOU think i did CH dirty go write an alternative ending yourself but it should be a minimum of 15 chapters including 5 written ones, with at LEAST 9k words each yeah? i wanna see you manage it all, pls prove me wrong snd show me you're better than me i'm genuinely begging bc it might inspire me to do "better" next time.
as a writer/artist/creator, and i can tell you probably arent one yourself or havent been one for long, the longer smth takes to come to an end the worse the pressure becomes which results in a blockage i dont wish upon my worst enemy i'm being deadass. i dealt with some of the worst writer's block ive had since i started writing literally 12 years ago and you're telling me i should have just "taken a break" and do "better"
i never, ever expected anything from anyone but some of you are so entitled to a writer's time and skill it's giving me a headache. maybe you didn't like the timing and writing of the last few chapters of CH and i guess that's unfortunate but this was so unnecessary because you completely dismissed everything else that could have been going on in my life and even belittled my mental health issues like im some fucking AI writing machine
do better, be nicer, write it yourself if you don't like it i'm so fucking over this
if i had gotten out of my own comfort and wellbeing and have actually written another set of written chapters i would have burned myself completely out. ive been in this fandom for not even a year and have already finished FOUR smaus with 50 chapters each, you do NOT get to tell me what i should or could have done better because you dont even give a fuck about me as a person this is just about receiving what YOU think YOURE entitled to but this is MY art and I will do what I see fit even if it's not what was expected of it because i'm a fucking human being with a life before i'm a writer on tumblr
oh, also: i do this for free ㅤ:) just a reminder :) this is my HOBBY :)
and don't you EVER call me lazy again when it comes to writing because i'm not gonna pour my heart and soul into a fic just for you to call me lazy when i literally wrote 50 THOUSAND words for this fucking fic just for the written chapters
goodbye
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chaosandmarigolds · 17 hours
Text
Festival
based on this AMAZING ask!!
“Oi, Olls,” Simon looks down at the skinned arm and then back to the utterly unaffected five-year-old (who just took a rather nasty tumble off the slide). It was an easy back day at the county fair, which for the record he thought was a horrible idea with a five-month old yet Johnny said it would be fun for Oliver and his niece, Jane. Simon tried to get a good look at the wound, covered in dirt and pebbles, “Lad lemme-”
“Dad-dad, I got go- Janie! Wait up!” Oliver snipped in reply, pulling his arm away and trying to take off after his new friend, and he succeeded, taking off to the next ride wait line- where Jane was already standing among the groups of children and teens with the bright red balloon tied to her wrist. 
Of course, he watched the boy run through the crowds and only stood to direct his gaze to Johnny as he stood up, not saying anything but trying to see past the groups to get a good look at the kids- but he could see the red balloon. 
“Think the girls are havin fun?” Johnny asked, leaning onto the stroller. 
To that Simon shrugged looking down to Tess, who was thankfully very much asleep amidst the loud noises, “‘m sure they are.” 
“Shoppin, wine tasting annnn,” Johnny faltered as he thought, looking to the sky as Simon knelt down to fix the baby blanket. Though it was loud and the crowds were bustling it still had a sense of peace about it, small town, small fair but it was enough to make the two kids feel as if they were teleported to the best place on the planet. “An’- gah, Sarah said somethin else, can’t ‘member what though.” 
“Jus gettin dolled up or somethin,” Simon mumbled under his breath and then placed a chaste kiss against the baby’s forehead before standing up to his full height, looking around for the same bright red balloon. 
Only…the balloon was floating away. 
It took about five strides to get from where he had been to the line where Olly and Jane were supposed to be, yet there was a stunning lack of them both. 
He must have called the kid's names twice before Johnny had caught on to what was going on, yet the only thing Simon could think of doing was telling him to go get security, he asked the people if they had seen them- his voice harsh and causing the looks on the parent's face’s to pale. 
He couldn’t find them. 
No one seemed to even see them. 
“A little boy- he’s missin his front tooth, striped shirt with a dinosaur on it.”
   “I’m sorry man, that sounds like every kid I’ve seen today.” 
… 
“Jane,” Ollie said slowly following his friend reluctantly through the corridors of the ‘haunted house’ which they had snuck in through the back, since there was a thirteen-plus age restriction on the attraction, “Janie I reaaaalllly don’t think this is good idea.” 
To that the four-year-old frowns, her pigtails swinging as she looks at him, the blue light and fog doing nothing to ease his fears, “Uncle Johnny always say we got face fears! An you said you are scared of the scary ghosts.”
“Scary is literally in name, Janie!” Ollie countered crossing his arms, “Uncle Johnny and my dad are gonna be mad.” 
Jane shook her head, clawing up on the ladder to reach the main level, “Uncle Johnny doesn’t get mad at me, mum said it’s cus ‘m cute…Uncle Simon might get mad though.” 
Ollie frowned from his spot, looking up at her as she began to disappear from the view, he couldn’t leave her alone, he was older than her and his dad did ask him to look over her. So, he swallowed down his fear and followed behind her, the steam and fog making it a bit hard to see for a moment before he was able to stand up again- the lights dim and red and the floor underneath them seemed to be uneasy, red liquid smeared along the rotted wood and the low groan of something was enough to make him want to cry. 
However Janie was walking forward, so he quickly followed, moving to walk just a bit in front of her- grabbing her hand and doing his best to act brave when in reality he was not. 
Ollie stopped walking when they heard a voice from behind, and he turned to look around for a split second, only for Jane to let out a shrill scream and he turned his head to look ahead again- to only mimic her scream. Shoving her behind himself as what seemed to be a literal monster jumped from behind a barrel. 
“Oh SHIT! CUT IT!!” 
A voice suddenly yelled, and then the monster ripped off the mask, revealing a normal-looking kid, probably sixteen, “Whoa-hey-hey, you guys- JERRY FUCKIN CUT THE LIGHTS.” The kid screamed at the ceiling for a moment for the overhead lights to flicker back on and the noises stopped. 
“Hey,” The kid knelt down to look at the now sobbing children, “Hey, my name is Kyle. How’d ya-oh cmon…it’s okay, I’m not scary.” 
“You-you ghost!” Ollie screamed. 
“No! No, it’s just a costume, ya know on how on halloween you dress up? I’m jus dressing up, I’m not gonna-oh okay, you’re crying…again, okay…” Kyle tried to explain, then looking to his coworker, Margo who was dressed as a zombie, utterly hopeless about the now two screaming and sobbing toddlers.
“Called security,” Margo huffs out as she sits down to look at the toddlers, who were much more relaxed once they offered slushies, and she looks to Kyle, “They said two creepy guys said they lost their kids but thought they were lyin.” 
Kyle frowns and leans back in his chair after he and Margo had made a lazy attempt at cleaning off their makeup and explained to the kids it seemed to calm them down, plus the slushies of course. “Hey kiddo, can you tell me your name? So the nice people-
“My dad says to not talk to strangers.” 
Margo gives the kid a look and leans forward on the table, “He’s smart, that’s smart- but we need to-” 
“Margo-” 
“OLIVER.” 
It would be an understatement to say Kyle and Margo picked those kids up within a millisecond, because what they saw were two men that could break them both in half within a second and who did not look like father material walking towards them. 
“That’s my kid.” One of them barked out, pointing to the little boy, who was just happily sipping his slushy. 
Kyle scoffs, “And I’m the fucking king of England.”
To that Margo tried to then play damage control, “Listen, I don’t want to have to call sec-” 
“Uncle Johnny we saw scary ghost!!” The little girl exclaimed happily. 
“See? That’s my niece and the boys mine. Give me my kid.”
Margo and Kyle exchanged looks and then looked to the little boy, who only caught on when he saw the man’s look and he nodded eagerly, messy hair falling in front of his face. 
“That’s Ister Riley he and my mom are married. He’s my dad.”
… 
“I jus wanna be brave ‘ike you Uncle Johnny,” Jane said as they drove home, still sipping her oversized slushie. 
Johnny and Simon had agreed to not mention this, to act like it never happened, for their sake. “I know, princess, an’ yer so so brave.” 
“I no longer scared of ghosts.” Ollie said mindlessly, staring out the window. 
That caught Simon’s attention and he looked back through the rearview mirror, checking on Tess with a quick glance and then to Olliver, “Oi? Yeah?”
“Mmmhm, cause ghosts are jus nice people wearin costumes.”
(annnnyway that's it!! feedback and comments are the easiest way to let me know you liked my work!! thanks to everyone for their support!)
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mayasaura · 23 hours
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re: your alecto post
so true! i haven’t been actively thinking about any of that but you’re so right. i do want to point one thing out though, you say that the body has never been anything but gentle with harrow, and you’re not wrong per se but at the same time i’m fairly sure that the body as we see it in htn is harrow hallucinating. which absolutely does not mean that the body has no bearing on the larger character of alecto, she Absolutely does. but i don’t think it’s at all inconsistent that the alecto we see when the tomb opens acts very differently from the body as we see her in htn.
I agree that the Body in Harrow the Ninth is sometimes Harrow hallucinating, but that "sometimes" is important. It seems odd to me that she would be conveniently hanging around just in time to nip into Harrow's body and become Nona if she weren't also sometimes really there.
It would also be odd from a narrative standpoint to spend so much time on Harrow's conversations with the Body, if that relationship was only ever really with herself and her idea of the Body. I'm thinking specifically of those rare occasions when the Body has something to say.
The first example that comes to mind is this little interaction, when the Body has interpreted Harrow's fear of death to her as being because she sees death as a mistake. Harrow asks what else it could be, and:
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This statement is nonsense to Harrow, and does nothing to answer her question. It's barely more than nonsense to us, until we learn Alecto's story. Now we know it's literally true. It's true, and it's something about Alecto that Harrow did not know. I feel confident in interpreting Alecto as having been in some way present in this scene. (Though her confusion implies to me that her memory loss did not start with Nona! That's fun!)
Then there's this exchange, right after Harrow has tried and failed to physically seduce the Body, and the Body has told her she has to leave:
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So fun fact: This is one of the ways I figured out Nona was Alecto. Nona has exactly the same casually dismissive attitude about sexual advances. "Oh, they wanted to see me naked. It was a sex thing. I don't really mind." This one is less certain than the other. If you want to believe the Body in that scene was a hallucination, there are other ways to explain it. But the continuity of personality there is pretty damn convincing to me.
Like, really tho, if the Body wasn't at least sometimes Alecto, then what was the point of all that? Isn't it way more interesting as an inconsistency between aspects, just as Nona and Alecto are inconsistent?
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disneyprincemuke · 2 days
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i didn't tell you i was scared * fem!driver
perhaps carrying the burden of being the perfect eldest daughter after all these years have its disadvantages as well
pairings: fem!driver and her literal family
notes: don't even get me started on how fuckin long it took me to write this bro and also let's not talk about how bad this one is ok? thanks
(series masterlist) | (📂 2025: fall from grace)
(prev)
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being back home has always brought about a sense of peace she hasn’t been able to replicate anywhere else. it’s just a different serenity when she’s back under the blankets of the bed she’d grown up in, surrounded by everything that reminded her of being young and innocent.
oh, how she misses the times when it felt like the world was in her hands. how naïve of her to think that if she worked hard, she’d get everything she wanted.
every single word of rejection slowly dug the trenches she’s managed to find herself in lately.
she’s so deep in that she doesn’t think there’s a way out.
she lies on her back, childhood stuffed animals burying her in the blanket. she bores holes in the roof of her room where her glow-in-the-dark stars stare right back at her.
she can almost hear the ghost of her 13-year-old self whining as oscar and logan prop themselves up on her bed to paste them on her ceiling, making fun of her for being too short to do it herself.
it used to be so simple.
there’s soft knock on the door followed bt the creaking of its hinges as it’s pushed open. a head pops in. “can we go to the store?”
“what?” she turns her head towards the door and furrows her eyebrows. “can’t you just take my car and go alone?”
dalton frowns, “is it such a crime to spend time with my very beautiful older sister?”
she raises an eyebrow. “you want me to pay, don’t you?”
“don’t make me sound so feral,” the young boy huffs with a roll of his eyes. “i haven’t seen you in months… come on, let’s do something together?”
“i don’t really…” she sighs as she meets her younger brother’s stare and hopeful smile. “alright, mate, just let me change out of my pyjamas.”
that’s how she finds herself at a convenience store at 2 in the morning, hands in the pockets of one of logan’s old jackets that he left in her parent’s house, slowly sauntering through aisles with a blank stare.
she’s been staring at a box of cereal for a couple of minutes, debating with herself if she should let herself indulge. but lately, it just doesn’t feel like she deserves nice things.
when dalton finds her, he’s got a basket full of snacks and drinks. he stops at the end of the aisle with a puzzled stare and tilts his head. “didn’t see anything you want?”
she smiles, “not really. and i’m supposed to be watching my diet — too much ice cream, noah said.”
which is just another blatant lie. she hasn’t touched a drop of ice cream since matt had packed his bags and left her apartment. she hasn’t even really been eating.
dalton hums, “i guess… let yourself have a cheat day, though.”
she sighs out a soft laugh and slings an arm over dalton’s shoulders. “maybe tomorrow. come on, let’s pay up before mama finds out i let you convince me to drive you out to the store in the middle of the night.”
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she rests her head at the foot of her bed, nose-to-nose with kidnapper as he sleeps peacefully on one of her pillows.
“wish my life was as simple as yours,” she mutters, running her finger along the cat’s nose. “wish i could sleep all day and be adored like you, kid.”
she glances at her phone, lying peacefully on her side table next to the bed. it’s been going off with constant text messages for the past 5 minutes, most from logan and oscar asking about her parents’ anniversary party, and some from matt.
she can’t get herself to pick up the phone and answering feels like such a daunting task. she can’t find the right words to type out and send out as an acceptable response.
“hey,” the door opens and her mother’s head pops in, “busy?”
she lifts her head and smiles slightly. “what do you need me to do?”
“can you pick up the decorations from town? it’s pre-ordered, so you just gotta pick it up. then maybe could you bring home some dinner?” her mother flashes her a sheepish grin, obviously hoping that she would say yes.
“can’t you get dalton to pick it up? i’ll let him use my car if that’s what you’re worried about,” she offers with a small, unnoticeable scowl on her face. her plan for the entire day was to simply lie in her bedroom and do absolutely nothing.
her day simply isn’t complete unless she’s wallowed in self pity.
“he’s barely permitted to drive a car with an adult in the passenger seat,” her mother sighs. “come on, please? i’ll make you your favourite breakfast tomorrow.”
“really? it has to be me?”
“you’ve locked yourself in your room the 2 days you’ve been back,” her mother sighs again with the shake of her head. “i thought you came home early to help around.”
“i came back early to spend my break here. that doesn’t mean anything about helping around,” she complains, yet she’s scrambling to get herself off her bed. she knows better than to get into this sort of argument with her mother — it’s simply not going to be worth it. “but if it has to be me…”
she gets up and drops kidnapper off in dalton’s room. she changes out of her day-old pyjamas and heads to town where her mother had asked her to go.
all the while cursing under her breath about having so much to do on her supposed break. she’d only driven herself back ahead of her parents’ anniversary party to give herself a break from the fast-paced nature of london.
that and the refusal to go back to her apartment when it no longer felt like home.
but she does all that her mother asks of her anyway because her mother says so.
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“you need to eat more, my love.” she watches her mother stand from her position on the dinner table and pick up a bowl of noodles. “you look like you haven’t been eating at all.”
“mama,” she tries to protest with a sigh, shaking her head as she tries to push away the bowl from her plate. “i’m not very hungry.”
her mother is insistent. she shakes her head with a soft huff, scooping out a bunch of noodles and putting it on the plate in front of her. “you need to eat more than you’re eating.”
she lets out an irritated sigh and turns to her father, sat next to her mother, for some sort of words to help her. but he just shrugs at her with an apologetic smile.
“i just want you to look like yourself again,” her mother sighs, pinching her cheek tenderly with a small smile. “you’ve had a tough year.”
she scoffs, dropping her head to toy with the noodles on her plate. of course, she uses her shit of a season to justify being an overbearing figure in her life. she would have been more tolerant of it — as she’s been her entire life — but it’s just not a good time for this behaviour right now.
“fine, whatever.”
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she glances down the hallway for anyone who would catch her before she opens the door. she’s greeted by 2 beds and an empty room, but an overwhelming familiarity of friendship. a friendship that she’s strayed so far from that it barely makes sense for her to be standing in this bedroom.
on top of the dresser is a framed picture of her, oscar and logan at a karting track in the earlier days of their karting days together. she stands between the boys, oscar and logan leaning into her with their lips pressed against either side of her cheeks.
on the beds, she can see the 3 of them cuddled up together when she was 14 seeking help from the older boys with her homework.
if she thinks hard enough, she sees her 15-year-old self on oscar’s bed with the blankets pulled up to her chin with logan and oscar squeezing in the other bed in the room when she’s having trouble sleeping by herself.
in the far corner of the room, she can see herself at 16 curled up on the floor after her first boyfriend had broken up with her. and oscar walks in with a small scowl but 3 pints of ice cream for them to share while they try to distract her of the pain.
the room’s been cleaned and polished by her mother, preparing for oscar and logan’s return for their anniversary party this weekend.
she makes a sharp turn for the cabinet at the side of the room, pushing through hangers of jackets and sweaters hanging neatly, untouched for god knows how long. she sighs when a familiar red jacket comes into view.
“i told mama this is mine,” she grumbles under her breath, pulling the jacket out of the cabinet. it’s a ferrari jacket that oscar had gotten from his parents when he was younger, but since he’d outgrown it, she’d claimed it for herself.
“oh, there you are.”
she turns around, with a heavy heart and teary eyes, and comes face-to-face with her father. “hey.”
“i’ve been looking all over for you,” he sighs heavily, stepping into the room with caution. “i just wanted to check in on you after what happened during dinner. you know mama meant well.”
she grins with a slight nod. “yeah, i know.”
“and we’re just concerned for you.” he wraps an arm around her and rests his chin on top of her head. “after the year you’re having… we’re all concerned for you.”
“concerned?” she repeats under her breath, looking up at her father. “regarding what? i’m doing fine.”
“personally, i’m just concerned because you’re my princess,” he mumbles, giving her a squeeze. “and you know… i’m your father? i know if something’s wrong, but it’s okay if you don’t wanna talk about it yet.”
she lets out a heavy sigh, relaxing in his arms. she wraps her arms around him and nuzzles her face into his chest, “thanks for not making me talk about it.”
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she throws her head back, trying to pull back the hand that’s clasped in dalton’s hands, yanking her towards the garage of the house.
“come on,” dalton mutters, “we’ll have so much fun! just like before!”
“dalton, i told you i didn’t feel like leaving the house today,” she whines, trying another attempt at pulling her hand back from him. “i have some things to settle with my finances and schedule… i’ve put that off for a couple days and kristen and noah need those by tonight.”
“i’m sure it can’t take that long,” dalton whines with a heavy sigh, tugging on her arm. “just a quick movie in at the theatre then a cup of ice cream?”
“dalton, come on, i said i don’t have the time for this!” she shrieks, yanking her arm back and stomping a foot on the ground. “i’ll pay for you to go with a couple of friends, but i can’t go with you. i have adult matters to handle before the week is over.”
dalton blinks at her, shocked at her sudden outburst. “i just wanted to spend time with you before you go off and not come home for months… i’m sorry.”
she opens her mouth to add to her previous statement, but seeing her younger brother with a frown on his face instantly felt like a pierce through her heart. “i– dalton,” she sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. “i just have so much going on right now. maybe we can go a little later? i just need to finish a couple of things for my team.”
“it’s alright,” dalton sighs dejectedly, shaking his head. he walks past her to head for the stairs. “maybe next time when you’re not being a bitch anymore.”
“what the fuck,” she mutters with eyebrows furrowed, turning around with her gaze following his steps. “you did not just say that.”
“what?” dalton whirls around. “it’s true. you’ve been such a bitch since you came back. you lock yourself inside your room, you never wanna talk to me, you never wanna join me for snacks, it takes me extra effort just to convince you to come out of the house and do stuff with me… you changed, mate.”
she takes a deep breath. “of course, you don’t understand. you’re just a 16-year-old — you don’t fucking know anything.”
“i know my sister,” dalton scowls. he rolls his eyes and scoffs with a dry laugh. “sorry, i mean i used to know my eldest sister. nowadays, you just ignore my texts, never return my calls and never wanna hang out. you’re a flake, rocky.”
“and you’re just a fucking kid, why should i take anything you say seriously? what do you know about anything that’s outside of your stupid video games and secondary school?” she huffs. “and what do you know about what’s going on with me? that’s not fair.”
“i’m not talking to someone who’s not open to criticism.” he glances at her over his shoulder one more time before running up the stairs. “get a grip, mate.”
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“hey, i heard you were back early.” the front door closing echoes in the house, ciara putting her backpack down next to the shoe rack.
the other girl sits on the couch, attention unwavering to the tv show she’s put on to watch. “yeah. hi.”
“i bought you dinner on my drive home from campus.” ciara skips over to the couch happily, leaning down on the back of the couch her older sister sits on. ciara turns her head to grin at her. “from the chinese restaurant. i got you some noodles and wanton.”
“oh, thank you.” she turns her head with a small grin and a soft eye, eyes stinging with every blink. “welcome home, ara.” she pulls ciara in for a short side hug and presses a kiss on her cheek. “how’s uni?”
“it was alright,” ciara shrugs. “join me for dinner?”
she hums, returning her attention to the tv screen. “maybe not; i’m still full from the lunch i had. but thank you for getting me dinner.”
“you’re home!” dalton appears at the top of the stairs with a big grin. “did you get me my fried rice?”
“of course!” ciara beams, beckoning him down towards the dining table. “help me set up the table. rocky’s still full from lunch. it’s just us, come on.”
dalton hops over to the kitchen with ciara, not sparing his eldest sister another stare. so she just turns off the tv and runs back to her bedroom.
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“oh. i didn’t know it was such a sensitive topic,” her mother shrugs with a soft chuckle. “i was just curious because you said matt was going to be here for the party this weekend and suddenly he’s not.”
the girl shrugs, keeping her stare on the plate. “yeah, but i really don’t wanna talk about him right now.”
“come on, just concerned for your relationship.” she clenches her jaw, feeling a knot form in her throat as she lifts her eyes to meet her mother’s stare across the table. “did something happen?”
“no,” she lies with a small grin. “he’s just got some things to settle back in the states. he’s just busy.”
“or maybe he realised you were a bitch,” dalton mutters under his breath.
“dalton,” ciara warns through gritted teeth, hitting dalton on the shoulder very gently. “what the hell?”
“what? it’s true,” dalton mutters. “you know that more than i do.”
“that’s enough,” her father speaks up. “let’s just eat dinner, okay?”
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“no, my love,” a whine comes from behind her, “you put it up wrongly.”
the girl on the top of the ladder looks over her shoulder and meets her mother’s judgemental stare and disappointed frown. “you literally told me to put it here, mama.”
“put it up higher, no– like– i’ll just do it.” her mother offers her a reassuring smile and beckons her to get down from her position.
“no, it’s so dangerous for you to be up here,” she mutters, attempting to readjust the wall decorations to her liking. “just tell me where to put it.”
“you’re,” her mother pauses, “not doing it right. just come down and let me do it.”
she huffs and drops her hands. “fine.”
she climbs down the ladder, folding her arms over her chest as she watches her mother replace her.
“see? isn’t that better.”
but she swears it’s exactly the way she’d put it up just a moment ago.
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“is this what you’re going to do the entire time you’re here? just mope in your room with your cat?”
she lifts her head from her pillow and turns, resting her head again as she stares at her mother standing at the door. “is this really how you want to start the day?”
“it’s noon. the day started almost 3 hours ago.” her mother leans on the door frame of her bedroom. “you have to get up and do something. locking yourself up in here,” she pauses to look around the kiddish bedroom, “it won’t make you feel any better.”
“i just have a lot going on,” she mumbles, flipping herself to face the other side of the room. “i’ll come down in a while. i just need a couple minutes.”
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“oh, my god, mama!” her voice echoes in the empty house, running down the steps with her mother following shortly behind her. “stop asking me about matt! i don’t want to talk about him right now!” she turns around at the bottom of the steps. “not with you; not with anyone!”
“i’m just trying to give him an answer, my love! he’s concerned for you. he said you haven't answered his messages all week,” her mother reprimands with her hands on her hips.
“that’s between matt and i and you have no say in this, sorry.” she raises her hands in the air to surrender before walking away. “it’s just none of your business.”
she’d just been relaxing in her room by herself when her mother came in trying to make conversation. she’d been receptive at first until she realised that she was trying to get her to talk about matt again.
which, she’s just not ready to open up about yet.
“it is if you’re acting this way! locking yourself in your room all day… fighting with dalton? don't even get me started on the way you can’t even clean up after yourself — you’re an adult now.”
“i’m an adult, yeah, so let me deal with my fucking problems however i see fit!” she laughs dryly and turns to face her mother again. “can i have some room to breathe? please? without everyone following closely behind me and staring at me like i’m pathetic?”
“we don’t think you’re pathetic!”
“i see the sorry in your eyes when you look at me! everyone seems to be looking at me that way lately!”
“my l–”
“just please leave me alone!”
so she gets in her car and drives away. she doesn’t know how long she drives for, tears in her eyes and chest heaving in sobs.
but she finds herself at the park nearby, one that she used to frequent with oscar and logan after school. she parks her car right by the roadside and forces herself onto the empty playground. she sits on the slide for hours until she feels slightly better.
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she pushes the front door open with a heavy sigh. the sadness of pulling up in the driveway of her house worries her. it’s like the sadness seems to find a way to follow her everywhere.
everywhere she goes, it’s like there’s a dark cloud hanging above her head and she doesn’t know how to make it go away.
“where have you been?” ciara’s voice startles her, sending her a step back. “we’ve been worried sick for you after you left so abruptly before dinner! you weren’t even picking up your phone!”
“i just needed some time alone,” she says with a heavy sigh. she closes the door behind her and slips out of her shoes. “i was just at the playground i used to go to with logan and oscar. think i left my phone in my bedroom before i left and i went to grab dinner–”
“seriously? you’re not even sorry?” ciara screams, throwing her arms in the air. “we’ve been so worried sick for you since you walked out for no reason?”
she tilts her head. “no reason? mama has been grilling me about things i don’t want to talk about since i came back.”
“she’s concerned for you! we’re all concerned for you!”
“i didn’t ask for your concern! i’m asking you guys to leave me alone; give me some fucking room to breathe!”
“then why did you come all the way here just to lock yourself in your bedroom? if you want to be left alone, you should’ve just fucking stayed in london where you have an apartment where no one will fucking bother you!”
she huffs, hands on her hips. “fine. i’ll just go back. since it’s such a bother that i’m too sad to be here right now.” she stomps past her younger sister and up the stairs, heading right for her bedroom.
“don’t try and guilt trip me to feel sorry for you!” ciara chases after her. “it’s just not fair that you came all this way to be fighting with every single person in this household! just because blythe’s not here, doesn’t mean you’ll get away with this behaviour!”
“i’m not trying to guilt trip you,” she snarls, grabbing her bag from the ground and shoving her things, sprawled all over her room, into it. “but i’m sorry my feelings are such a burden to you guys. cause personally, i’m not having the best time.”
“if you’re not having the best time, don’t bring us down with you! it’s mama and papa’s anniversary! spend a little time not thinking of yourself for once!”
“i’ve spent my whole life not thinking of myself! you don’t know — you’re just a spoilt brat who got everything she wanted growing up! i actually had to work for the things i wanted.”
ciara scoffs, finally stepping into the room. “who gave you the right to act all high and mighty like you’re better than everyone? being the eldest kid doesn’t mean shit, genius.”
“well, what would you know about being the eldest kid? you never had to take care of anyone besides yourself; you never had to think of anyone but yourself.” she picks up kidnapper, sleeping on the foot of her bed and throws her bag over her shoulder. “just fuck off, ciara.”
“you’re not the only one with problems, you know,” ciara scoffs, folding her arms over her chest. “and what, you’re leaving? way to face your problems head-on.”
“i’m leaving because clearly i’m not wanted here,” the older girl sighs, pushing past the girl to her bedroom door. “so let me get out of your hair before my sadness becomes too contagious for your liking.”
“you’re leaving?” blythe says in shock, watching her older sister walk past her without another moment’s hesitation. “but i just got here. and isn’t the part tomorrow?”
“she’s throwing us the dramatics!” ciara announces with a loud laugh, running down the stairs to catch up with her older sister heading right for the front door. “she’s leaving because she can’t face the fact that she could be overreacting this one time!”
“overreacting?” blythe repeats, following both sisters down the stairs. “what are you guys even fighting about?”
“she left for hours with no contact!”
“i don’t even wanna stay long enough for you to paint me to be the villain,” the girl announces, pulling the front door open. “i’m leaving.”
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