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#what the FUCK was going on lmfao they came out of nowhere and it wasnt like. an especially stressful time of my life
misfithive · 1 month
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Omg yessss someone who finally understands what it feels like 😭😭
I’m so tired of people always saying “this isn’t hs, this is a DrAmA series, what do you expect?” in that condescending tone that is used to make you look stupid, acting like we didn’t watch s1 and even with THAT finale, it made us stay and continue it. Bc s1 was balanced. Yes, very bad things happened but there were also calm and nice moments. And throughout the seasons the angst got more and more and the fluff got less and less. Excuse me if I’d like to see them happy for once especially since this is the very last season and what we got is that Simon is very sad, Wilhelm is losing his damn mind over and over again and two cute moments out of a thousand intense/angsty. It’s exhausting and it doesn’t make me excited to watch it. I don’t even rewatch s2 fully bc it’s too much, I’m scared I won’t be able to enjoy this one either…
Tbh idk how people can be so happy about seeing them once again go through hell, but maybe that’s me.
You know what months ago i probably would have tried to make u feel better and say that it’s probably gonna be nice moments in there as thats what i was telling myself for the past year that they are boyfriends now so they wont be fighting as bad but i did not know that there was a fate worse than fighting lmfao like i cannot get over the rock thru his window thats so traumatic. And “love isnt supposed to be this hard” LISA WHAT THE FUCK WHY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
I need to see them happy and smiling and joking together bc if we dont see it we will never see it i feel like thats what the added pressure is. And the logical side of my brain is like well they will be joking around together at the palace from that teaser but then i’m like okay but then august ruins it and Wille is upset again at the meeting so idk im also finding it a bit exhausting. Its legit whiplash i was so happy to see them happy in the stills then that trailer came out of nowhere crushing my soul i think i just wasnt expecting it to be that intense i thought that one moment in the uniforms would be like the height of it.
I’m mostly scared bcs im serious that trailer really fucked me up and i want to be able to enjoy the season im scared its going to be too intense or trigger me in some way when all i wanted was to see them happy for more than 5 minutes. i dont want somber yes we are so in love but our lives are miserable. I genuinely need to see them LAUGHING AND HAPPY BCS THEY ARE 16 and this is so legitimately unfair 😭😭😭😭😭☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️
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wrestlezon · 2 years
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liveblog containment zone for aew dynamite 8/3/22
i wasnt going to do this, i was just gonna casually sit back and watch but then the undisputed elite promo started and i decided to get invested today
best friends trenchcoat bit good. just as janky as it went in pwg lmao. i love them when chuck came out to save orange-- he has a sleeveless tiedye shirt?? GUNS OUT??? love lookin at your arms king keep up the good work HELL yea (insert further wolf barking and catcalls here)
ricky starks video bit-- i wonder how powerhouse hobbs is going to justify his turn
oh its adam cole? we doing this now? ok. i thought i'd see hobbs are these dang dudes finally going to arrive at the firework factory lots of talking. ive been waiting for this whole thing to blow up in adam cole's face forever (in true heel fashion) hmm... they wouldnt have kenny omega come back yet right... wowww youre just going to force them not to fight? lmao?? who made you the boss WHOAAAAA he finally did it!!! he played his hand!!! who is going to save them <:( THE POP FOR HANGMAN!!!!!!! ohhhhhhhhh the pickup...
oh its christian cage... lmao you can hear the crowd laughing "HE BROUGHT UP MY PERSONAL LIFE I WOULD NEVER DO THAT" ok LMFAO christian cage is so fucking funny HOLY SHIT THAT CAR WAS MOVING FAST
hello??? britt baker team vs thunderstorm!!!!!!!!!!!! WOW wasnt expecting this ooooohhhhh new outfit jamie hayter?? fancy rebel reminds me of xena warrior princess... maybe its the hair holy shit that thunder rosa kick from outta nowhere looked like it hurt whoa!!! hayter and baker won with the pin on toni storm
sammy tay marriage? ok i guess. cringe EDDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! eddie is the realest. ultimate face. i agree with everything he is saying SO TRUE BOO THIS WEDDING eddie may have lost the cagematch (i didnt like that result) but he does get on all the ppvs
TEAM TAZ IS OVER.... GOLLY... lmao makes sense tho. poor taz. he is just like literally if idk whats going on in my own team then i just WONT HAVE ONE. TEAM OVER. DISBAND powerhouse hobbs match its starks! he practically teleported past the camera going so fast LMAO omg he was also obscured by smoke and fog and im blind
oh!!!!!!! miro video promo MIRO ARE YOU GOING TO GET AN EVIL BAD GUY EYE TOO...
commercial
oh its darby allin doing a video promo against brody king hes giving himself a tat and the buzzing is quite annoying and distracting
jim ross alert
oh! its the christian cage match. who is he fighting again oh!!!!!!!!! matt hardy!!!!! matt hardy and his penance mullet im distracted thinking about all the laundry i have to do. but i am appreciating this match between two ogs table! table! table! table! ohhhh!! dodged and a win by christian cage strangely normal win for evil badguy cage wait i spoke too soon hes breaking out the steel chairs huh! LUCHASAURUS....... BY HIMSELF???? I FEAR... oh!!!!!!!!!! distraction fakeout for jungleboy! LMAO HIS SHIRT? IN LIKE DEFAULT ARIAL? LOWERCASE IMPACT FONT???
Christian is a pussy.
hey its daniel garcia doing a backstage promo
kip sabian return?? shall he come back and fight pac???
ethan page is wearing an excellent shirt today. he is so fashionable ethan page bitching and moaning in the ring promo stokely!!!! stokely TAKE ETHAN PAGE AWAY FROM DAN LAMBERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!! YESSSS ETHAN PAGE LEAVE THE AMERICAN TOP TEAM PLEASE YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh boy! and now its 2point0 backstage promo time!!! hell yes DO YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT GETS DADDY MAGIC'S NIPPLES HARD ok i love anna jay's insatiable need to choke someone out. she needs her fix stu grayson isnt around anymore so now she is just choking out whoever whenever
oh its the acclaimed vs gunn club dumpster match now!! LMAO NICE off to a great start with the trash cans oh and we get a rap too? max caster is spicy today wow in the dumpster already that was fast is austin gunn wearing a croptop and overalls is someone gonna pop out of the dumpster on the ramp... maybe not. but itd be a good hiding spot oh on top of the tunnel? buddy.... caster!! OFF THE TUNNEL ONTO A TABLE... GOLLY omg ziptied. theyre locked in now lol wait are they gonna just roll the dumpster out now. kidnapping? OH... WHOA JEEZ
matches were announced! waow
its wheeler yuta vs jericho time! who will win!? i honestly dont know. i'd want yuta to win but i think jericho would end up winning regardless... through bluster or shenanigans EJECTED lmao the crowd pulling off the whole goodbye song??? nice there is wrestling occuring. and also slap fights i love that yuta's thing is his insane german suplexes. its always cool and charming to have a Signature Favorite Move oh no! walls of jericho!!!! THE YUTA CHANTS FROM THE CROWD!!!!!!!!! yuta DOUBLE TOPE???? TRIPLE??? YUTA CONTAIN YOURSELF oh no!!!!!!!!! yuta codebreakered! KICK OUT... wait i looked at the clock and spoilered myself. i can rest easy for a few more minutes the bat! THE DISTRACTION!! NOT HIS DICK AND BALLS SEATBELT AGAIN????? nooooo!!! submission held!!!! yuta tapped....
killing him!!! moxley to da rescue
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brothalynchhung · 3 months
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2023 overview
im such a loyal person man LMAOOO i still specfically come back here to do this lool anyways this year was fucking insane like FUCKING insane and long as hell... grniguehrsi
i think i started the year a lil depressed cuz i was working that fuckass job
lets seee
i think jan 2023 was nothing but me suffering through that fuck ass job, gyming, etc.,
that old apt ahahah i mean tbh it was nice but too big and TOO SECLUDED omg
actually the way i spent a whole year so isolated from society was crazy what the fawk
i dont even think i got much out of it like self improvement wise
maybe japanese? guitar? but that came only at the end
i guess playing ps5... lol -_-
i gained so much weight cuz of depression and that stressful ass job
the way i think majority of that weight was just the AMOUNT OF CORTISOL BUILD UP I HAD
anyways jan was whatever
then i went to umrah in feb which was stressful cuz the amount of ppl and the BUGS man god
this whole time i thought my prayers werent answers but they were tbh i had a good year even if there was struggles
i didnt get gl yet but APPARENTLY thats too much to ask for
whatever
then barcelona lMAOOO which was okay!! i think i would have obv enjoyed it more if i wasnt there for work but i mean still it was just another european city
my spanish was ass
i was too paranoid about someone jacking my phone lol
survived tho
ate some GOOD ASS FOOD. omg best food ever
and the sangriaasss omg
it was worth it being the canon event of me getting fired LMAO
hoenstly was a lil ugly ass bitch that co founder was fuck him fr
loser highkey
anywho
so spain barcelona and saudi 2 countries down within the first 3months of the year
tbh basically up until june majority of my year was this stupid ass job travelling here and there complaining about that ugly ass bitch
omg what a shaytan that man was holyshit and not like a powerful shaytan more like a whiny weak insecure life sucking pitiful pathetic piece of shit shaytan the one that lowers the energies of everything around it
pitiful ass human fr im so happy that shit got out of my life
that was the best thing to happen to me this year like not exclusively him but the whole job too LOL
like thanks for the pay and travel finessed the fuck out all tbh BYE
chaper closed thank god
and whats crazy is that the SECOND after that meeting i forgot about it all lMFAOOOO LIKE I WAS READYY
march was cool i finally got to go back to america
actually march lowkey changed my life
texas was so much fun omg i miss america man americans are nice just h8 their govt
sxsw!!! DUDE ive always wanted to go and GOT TO ALL under someone elses coin LMFAOOOOOO
met cool ppl ig, saw cool things, film and tv industry - coool cool cool
and i didnt rlly have to do shit there LMAO
anyways then went to houston where nadas friend HELD IT DOWNNNNN
like finally omg i got to get hiiii FINALLY
RODEO HIGH VEGAN SOUL FOOD HIGH
THE FOOD WAS SO GOOD THE RECORD SHOPPING WAS SEXY
so good
then i came back and i was mad depressed cuz i should be out there working and learning from ppl who like the shit as me not stuck out the middle of FUCK ASS NOWHERE DOING NOTHING
which yeah i think that like lit the fire out of my ass about how much i hated the job and place and cuz ad was like quarantine istg
thennn hmm april..OH YEAH JAPAN
BASICALLY ONCE I GOT BACK IT WAS HELL DEALING WITH THAT FUCK ASS JOB CUZ OF THE STUPID ASS.
i dont even remember waht the bullshit ass term is
uhhh i forget lMAOOO that stupid bullshit where i was PERFORMANCE PLANNN
stupid as fuck what kind of corporate fake working society term is that omfg
AND FOR NOTHING BUT THAT THING IN BARCELONA WHERE I DIDNT GO TO SOME BULLSHIT
i dont care was worth it like fuck yeah bitch!! i really am using yall to fuck around and travel cuz THIS STUPID ASS JOB IS NOT MY FUTURE
and it isint omg its like it never exsited LMFAO
anyways that stressed me out but thank god i had edibles lmao
DUHA HELD IT DOWNN
mmm then i survived to japan
I WENT TO JAPAN THIS YEAR OMFG AFTER YEARS!!! YEARSSSS!!! OF DREAMING ABOUT JAPAN!!! I GOT TO GO
honestly me going to japan was what made this year like this def had to be one of the best years of my life just for that on its own
actually like yeah this def was oddly enough one of the best years of my life?
emotionally hell yes but everything else was good
jsut stupid self-inflicted stress (minus that fuck ass job)
anyways japan was amazing left it wanting to learn the language and AM
i cant wait to go back
and the fact i hit tokyo kyoto and osaka all at once omg amazing
nintendo world 😭 shibuya 😭 just kyoto in general 😭
i bought so much omg
THE FOOD OMG THEIUEHGSEIUH
i had so much good food this year lmao barcelona, japan, texas 🤪
anywhoo after that i basically dont remember much of may like it was just tryna get through the shit and deal with that stupid ass plan and talking to that dumb bitch
which i punked off and he didnt like like fuck u u ugly untalented waste of life ? im not talking nice to u or respecting your bitch ass
and he think getting rid of me was a slap in the face as if that wasnt exactly what i wanted LMFAOOO
3 months leave with pay ??? and i scammed yall w the ticket price?? LOOOOOL oKAYYY THANKS!!!
CHAPTER CLOSED
so basically june they let me gooo true freedom then had the best month of my life in thailand which was FUCKKINGGG MAAZINGGG
omg thailand was so much fun i felt so free
the most free and most happy i ever felt in my life
krabi .. rayleh beach omg the weed and shrooms on the beach 😭
seriously i had no one in my face, no bitches, no work, money, freedom, time, no problems NOTHING
i seriously think those few days in krabi were the happiest moments of my life ever
like pure freedom and security and happiness in ever sense of each word
soooo grateful
and i deserved it after all the stupid ass stress that stupid ass job put me through
and the whole time i was there i was just so grateful i never felt that much gratitude in my life ever
thailand in general was fun omg i bought so much stuff i loved bangkok
i just love travelling man seriously im just built to travel around discover and learn about the world i love connected with the world and exploring and adventuring i hate being stuck in a place
all i ever want to do is travel and live like really LIVE
hate work
anywho right after i came back to my freedom then basically just chilled until i had to go to canada
which was 🙄
listen - ottawa was surprisingly okay actually i enjoyed it, i smoked, i walked around listening to y2k music, stayed at home all cozy, appreciated the nature and the nostalgia lmaoo even chilling w lina and her cousins was fun
but toronto -_- listen im never going to forgive that bitch for throwing me out and those other hoes for not being there for me
shout out to p tho lol
all i wanted to do was leave istg
toronto was a lil boring but i was also just mad cuz all my friends were all
CUT OFFFFF ill never see yall again except maybe nadine and p
for once ottawa was better than toronto
anyways i think im 1000% done w toronto
CHAPTER CLOSED
thank god finally
oh yeah i started a youtube account that im trying to take seriously i guess LOL
i still need to keep going and working on it but its fun
OH YEAH CHICAGOO
LOLLAAPALOOZAAA
yeah thank god that crazy bitch didnt come but omg what a waste of a ticket but anyways her L not mine
just thankful that i had the money for all of this -_- shout out that fuck ass job i guess lmao
part 2... ?
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angelicmichael · 3 years
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What if Xavier had a kid he didn't know about and he meets them for the first time after he's already a ghost? Maybe there's a kindergarten group that takes a trip to the camp, and he just has this spirit intuition as soon as he sees them and KNOWS it's his child. Do you think you could expand on this idea? I'd love to see what you come up with!
A/N: This was so fun, thank you for this idea dear anon!! I'm sorry it's late but hopefully u like it 😶. Also, I apologize this is so dark and heavy- I didnt intend for it.. it just, kinda happened lmfao. I turned this into a 'x reader' and it starts with Xaviers POV and ends with readers perspective!! First few paragraphs are pretty dark and then the rest is weird.. angst fluff LOL.Hope yall enjoy 💖💖💖
Warnings: First few paragraphs discuss Xavier's thots about dying SO, it highkey gets dark yall I'm so sorry, mentions of anger?? issues, mentions of murder, stops getting dark roughly around paragraph 6 if u wanna skip all that, MAJOR ANGST, reuniting, very brief Xantana reference 😈, mention of kids, bit of fluff.. think that's it :)
In Xaviers eyes; the worst part of being killed in a desolate camp and having to reside there for the rest of eternity; wasnt the fact that he would have to handle Richard Rameriez and tolerate his peers for eons to come. Sure, both of those things required an adjustment period but.. the realization that his life with you was abruptly cut short, was what truly broke him.
It took him being stripped from everything he once knew to truly appreciate how heavenly life once was before Camp Redwood. He had a steady job, good friends, and a relationship with a actual living, breathing person.. Not to shade Montana or anything, of course. However he had taken all of those things for fucking granted; moving to Camp Redwood definetly had made him become humble- at the very least. He was now nothing but a mere shell of the person he once was; nothing to bring him out of this absolute living nightmare he found himself in.. At first this mindset nearly consumed him, it drove him to kill multiple times.
There was no point in trying to conceal the anger he felt, no way of trying to channel it out into a more socially appropriate way and at this point.. there really was no point in trying to do so. Out here in the forest, espically after he was killed, life outside of the forest soon seemed as if it was some type of myth or fairytale- something not real or attainable. Time in the redwood forest felt different- days quickly bled and melted into weeks, and then months.. trying to guess the date was something Xavier gave up on doing after about the first week.
As much as he tried to deny it, being dead and becoming trapped here had completly made him lose his grip on reality and his previous life. Soon enough, the thought that life even fully existed outside of the camp and that there was actual fucking laws against killing (something which was now a leisurely hobby) had completly slipped his mind momentarily in the beginning as well. Out here in the forest, nothing felt real execpt for his anger that he held onto so tightly.
It was really the only thing he had left; atleast for a while.
The pain of losing his partner, (y/n), still remained but letting that grief not consume him was easily the hardest battle he had fought in his life. Xavier realized he still had his friends - and if he really was going to live for eternity, he sure wasnt going to spend it angry.
After so many years of being 'cursed' to spend forever in this forest, keeping track of the time was something Xavier rarely bothered with, but - it was obvious by the suns posistion, and even the slight mist that made the grass wet that it was just starting to cut into morning. Xavier walked through the forest alone, nowhere in particular to go or to necessarily do, only a sudden need to go and be alone. Almost a beckoning, for him to go and be somewhere else. To witness something.
His days were more often than not purely mundane; he had absolutely no excuse to not listen to this odd and sudden attraction he felt toward a very particular spot in the camp.. so, that's what brought him to where he stood now. Close to the road that brought visitors (a nice word for victims) into Camp Redwood, right next to the mess hall which was rarely used close by.
Xavier felt wildly uncomfortable standing so close to the place which previously held so much trauma - and honestly still did.. The place where Chef Bertie died. Xavier paused, about to just say 'fuck it' and just give up and go back to where his friends resided (or atleast Montana) when.. he heard it.
His sign, the thing that seemingly enticed him in the first place.
It first sounded like the old, familar sounds of tires coming across a gravel road - Xaviers mind immeadietly jumped to perhaps this could be new people.. new vistors.. new victims.
His blood ran cold when he heard something else; an eerie ringing of chains hitting against the ground. Something that was mostly a associated with buses.. and hauntingly familar. He had little to no time to think or even act on his suspicion when he noticed that a yellow school bus full, and nearly combusting with children was pulling into the camp.
Xavier wasnt exactly certain the bounds that ghosts had when it came to certain bodily functions like vomiting, but hes sure that under normal circumstances he would certainly be sick by now. Nevertheless he could feel his body tense up and the other natural symptoms associated with anxiety also kicked in. Urging him to clumsily get out of vision; he stumbled behind a few trees that poorly blocked him from sight. He continued to watch in complete and utter horror as the bus came to a stop, and it didnt take long for kids to start pouring out of the bus. Xavier felt his heart drop and his blood run cold every time a kid exited the bus and stepped on the dirt soil of Camp Redwood.
Xavier whipped his head around; scanning the surrounding area to make sure no other ghosts were here to bear witness to this.. Xavier was nearly always down to commit murder, it was really the only thing that kept him from fully going insane from pure fucking boredom but - kids? There was no fucking way he would let anyone touch them.
While he thoroughly scanned the area, he noticed a few adults leave the bus out of his periphery vision. He thought nothing of it, chaperones were to be expected on elementary field trips but.. the strange beckoning feeling he felt ealier visited him again, urging him to turn his head fully and look at one of the chaperones more closely. Instantaneously, he then automatically realized why he felt so compelled to come to this spot.. Why he was meant to be here at this exact moment.. It was you.
At first he thought he was merely hallucinating; you definetly looked significantly different from the last time he had saw you but.. he knew it was you, his partner that he had before his life completly went to shit (minus the catastrophe that occured with Blake, of course). He knew instantly, it was your eyes, your stature and just.. your overall warm and familiar aura that gave your identity away. He couldnt believe that the person he had so fucking desperately wanted to see more than anyone or anything was only a few feet away - and now, that you were finally here... All he wanted for you to do was to leave.
As soon as he saw you he felt a sudden tightness posses his chest and throat which accompanied the formation of tears burning his eyes; hastily blurring his vision. He had to physically restrain himself from sobbing outloud; trying his best to just swallow down his tears. His whole body felt as if it was on fire with anxiety, but he chose to continue to stand still behind a few dainty trees - trying to pull himself together so he could actually have the chance to think critically and choose what the ever living fuck he was going to do next.
While he waited for his blurry vision to clear, he chose to focus on the semi distant figure that he knew was you. He took in the little details; like how the sun highlighted the colors in your hair and your simple but charming outfit. It took him several moments to think of why you would even be here in the first place, with a school bus- and thats when another dreadful realization hit him.
Only parents were mainly chaperones when it came to elementary field trips.. meaning-
No other thought crossed Xaviers mind as his eyes flicked down inhumanely fast to the child where (y/n) stood next too.. and immeadietly he knew.
The features the child shared of both you and Xavier were partially a giveaway, but most importantly.. it was the feeling he had that confirmed his belief. The initial anxiety he felt of the kids arriving still remained but was significantly muted and mostly replaced with a overwhelming sense of pure love. The feeling spread to every fiber of his being, and so did a odd urge to protect this small being which he knew was his.
Not ever in his entire life had he felt this way about someone (execpt for perhaps, you). He felt himself taking a few steps forward, at first completly involuntary but he knew he had to talk to you. Just the idea of reuniting tasted so fucking good but, he knew he couldnt get too greedy if he was going to talk to you. He knew confronting you had to be solely done in order to save you and his child, he couldnt get carried away. He wouldnt.
He tried his best to appear casual as he submerged from behind the trees, his hands held behind his back - the only way he could get them to stop shaking. He tried to relax his shoulders and appear confident as he strided up to you; your back turned toward him. He continued until he was directly behind you, he wanted to tap your shoulder but - touching you seemed out of the question. That would confirm everything, it would make it seem actually real and not like this just some torturous dream.
"(Y/n)"? He spoke.
Xaviers breath hitched as he watched you whip around to face him. He studied your features as you went from looking utterly confused to surprised beyond belief.
"Xavier, what-"
"We need to talk".
Xavier quickly grabbed your hand, leading you away from herd of kids and the few sparse chaperones that were amongst them. A few of them gave you two a few odd looks but neither you or Xavier particularly cared, after all this was the first time in years you two had seen eachother. You hastily followed his lead, feeling slightly embarrassed that it was obvious how nervous and simply caught off guard you currently were. Your palms (one of which was still holding onto Xaviers hand) were starting to moisten with sweat. These feelings only amplified once Xavier turned around to face you. The intensity that was in his eyes put you on edge - never in your time of dating or knowing him did he ever look so serious with you.
"What are you doing here"? Xavier spoke, his voice was still in a higher pitch, slightly breaking.
"What"?
After years of not being able to see you, in fact; years of you not even knowing where he went - this was how he chose to greet you?? Automatically your blood ran cold with the sudden realization that something was wrong. Seriously wrong.. but the feeling didnt just apply to your ex boyfriend. It was the entire camp.
"Its not safe here, you need to take the kids and leave". Xaviers voice more visibly shook this time as he spoke; as if his words physically pained him.
Your heart skipped a beat, the sudden pain and anguish starting to fully settle in. You couldnt believe it; after years of not seeing you - this was all he had to say? Was he fucking joking?
"What? A-are you kidding? Xavier, I havent seen you in years- I didnt even know you would be here-"
"I'm sorry (y/n). I'm so sorry but you have no idea what this place is like. You just need to go, and the kids. And promise me you wont come back".
It was torturous to watch tears gather in Xaviers eyes, and watch as they streaked down his cheeks. The sadness you previously felt was now washed away with red, hot rage. The feeling spread throughout your body like a wildfire that he was seemingly rejecting you.. but you knew now this wasnt some pathetic excuse. Something was seriously wrong here; and now it was starting to become too obvious to ignore.
Xavier looked hauntingly the exact same from the last time you saw him. He forever, looked as if he was still stuck in the same moment of time - like in the summer of 1984, which was when you last saw him.
You didnt realize you were still holding onto one of his hands until you reflexively tried to move it to brush away his tears that were still staining his cheeks; but awkwardly.. you chose to do so with your other hand. Squeezing the one hand you were still holding onto a bit tighter.
He winced as you touched him, and as much you tried your damn best to hold it together - you could feel tears starting to burn your eyes as well.
"I cant promise I wont ever come back, Xavier. I need to see you again, and what about-" you said softly, about to reference the child you two shared together.
"No, you'll see me again (y/n). I promise.. okay"?
He brought your hand up to his mouth to kiss your knuckles; the tears you trying so desperately to hold in were now sliding down your cheeks. Your breathing was now horribly choppy. You were on the brink of full on sobbing but you held yourself back - it was nearly time for you to go.
The fact you would have to go back to go the others and make up some bullshit excuse to leave, put a bitter taste in your mouth.. but your sure Xavier had a valid reason for ushering you to leave. Even if he didnt want to tell you right now; you trusted him with your life.
"Okay.. Fine. I'm coming back though, and I'm sorry I couldnt find you sooner". You admitted.
You dropped his hand that you were still holding in order to wrap your arms around him. To get one final touch to remember him by. You were desperate to fully touch him and to be wrapped in his embrace, something you had desperately and madly missed. As he held you; you tried to soak in his scent, his aura.. just the fact that he was even here seriously with you, in this moment.
You previously assumed Xavier had passed away; that was easier to come to terms with rather than thinking he willingly ran away or.. that something else more sinister had happened. A part of you wanted to be frustrated that you were leaving with more questions than answers but.. you didnt care. Your heart didnt care. You were just happy you were able to see your boyfriend.. no matter the circumstance or conditions it came with. Even though you were stupidly happy, your thoughts kept annoyingly circling back to the same question - how was Xavier here with you, living.. breathing.. in the flesh. How was this possible? You were about to speak your thoughts outloud when you first felt Xavier break away from you. You didnt get as much as a second glance just when you felt something soft on your cheek. Perhaps a goodbye kiss? and then.. just like he wasnt there at all, he was gone. Almost as if he completly disintegrated into the fresh, morning sky.
You felt your entire body stiffen as you realized he was gone.. again. It was difficult to pinpoint exactly how you felt. It was a nasty mix of both grief and anger that left you completly speechless and deathly still. You took a step back to combat the feeling, and attempted to look casual (and not like the person whom you were just hugging had completly fucking vanished). Sheepishly taking a look at the group you had arrived with and making sure none of them noticed your.. odd behavior.
Sure enough, none of them did. They all stood, and continued on conversing just like they were before you had broke away from them. Smiling and laughing as if nothing was wrong; just like they didnt have a care in the world - just as if the love of their life wasnt ripped away from them for a second time.
Even though Xavier was now gone, that odd, unsettling feeling still lingered with you. Like something was terribly wrong here, in Camp Redwood. The feeling wasn't entirely bad though; sure - the overall air in this place reeked of something terrible but.. now you felt something else mixed into it. A comforting essence of safety; Xaviers presence. You knew he wasnt directly beside you anymore but he was somewhere.. lurking. Watching you, as you begrudgingly walked over to the group you came with. Making up a bullshit excuse in your head so you could escape whatever this place was pretending to be.
Taglist: @michaellangdonstanaccount @langdonsexual @jimmason @blakewaterxx @dark-mei-rose @9layerdevilfoodcake @prophecy-is-inevitable @matildaofoz @beautyiswithinchaos @frenchlangdon @instincts-baby let me know if u would like to be added!! :)
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moldypieceoflasagna · 5 years
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36 questions that nobody asked me
(except @lollipoppedchainsaw )
(the 36 questions that lead to love or whatever) https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html
1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
I hate going out to dinner so much i probably wouldnt be able to enjoy it properly
2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
It would be interesting to see what it’s like for a short period of time, but i’d never be able to keep it up; i’d probably have an identity crisis
3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
yes i have to mentally prepare myself 100% of the time
4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
hanging out with the people i love is enough to keep me happy for a good while tbh. sitting around doing nothing literally nothing with them is endlessly entertaining to me even though sometimes i might make that hard to believe 
5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
i sing to myself a lot, not so much to others- although i AM a slut for karaoke
6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
body because i feel thats probably what old people complain about most. plus like,, 90 years of life knowledge? sounds great to me
7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
probably an accident that’s almost statistically impossible
8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
single rn (ladies) but i usually try to find friends with similar music tastes because scream-singing in the car is the most fun one can have
9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
im most grateful for my dogs and for my friends! i love them and it means the world to me to have people that i can call family. also i would die without my dog juno, she is my rock (and my therapist)
10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
Not rly how i was raised, but i wish i had a closer relationship with my older siblings. Three of them had moved out before i was rly old enough to not be an asshole child, so most of them still see me as an asshole child and they never take me seriously. im glad i have an alright relationship with them, but that’s kinda all it is and i know i could do better
11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
Lived in Texas my whole life yeehaw. I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters; 2 of them dont like me, and my relationship with the other 2 is,, certainly not bad. Had a lot of physical and mental illness in the past, but 20gayteen is definitely my year, yeet
12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
either speaking a different language or playing the piano. im very jealous of good piano players, and at some point i need to be able to speak a more useful language than french because so far in texas it’s proved absolutely useless (other than talking to my mom but that doesnt count)
13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
I’d wanna know wtf im supposed to do with my life because sweaty i still have no idea. passion? dont know her please introduce me
14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
i wanna go skydiving bitch, no one wants to go with me! pussies!!! the lot of you
15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
that one time i did an entire semester’s worth of work in the last three days of the school year
16. What do you value most in a friendship?
being able to put up with my huge fucking mouth. also honesty is super important, even if it’ll make me feel shitty
17. What is your most treasured memory?
when i went camping with a bunch of friends and they were bitter i got to be in the middle of the tent because they were all cold. either that or the time i was getting really bad sleep paralysis and @lonelywaterfall & @skity stayed over so my paranoia didnt render me completely useless,,, also the paramore concert lol ive never been more vulnerable in my life.
18. What is your most terrible memory?
coming out to my mom haha
19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
i’d go on a trip around the world to explore/to see a few people, and i’d put extra effort into my gender expression
20. What does friendship mean to you?
comfortable silence is my kink. also emotional vulnerability and SAD BOY HOURS we cant forget those
21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
I’m such a slut for physical affection yall have no idea please hug me as much as possible and play with my hair or my hands
22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
i guess ill do the same with previous partners so.. i think being funny is probably the #1 thing i appreciate in someone. when you make me laugh so hard i cry, just know that’s like. peak. also stubbornness is strangely attractive to me, plus like,,, uh having an unexpected soft side? an appreciation of art is super important, too. also SPOON VERSATILITY.
23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
it was probably happier than a lot of people’s but there wasnt much to it. plus being the youngest in my ENTIRE family really sucked during my childhood because everyone picked on me and i think that’s probably what started a lot of my issues lol
24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
better than it could be, but definitely not what i want it to be. we both love each other and i admire her work ethic, but she gave me a lot of anxiety problems (both genetically and not) and she isnt the most understanding person. i have hope though, people change
25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling …
I’m hungry and sitting alone in front of my computer feeling like OVERSHARING ON THIS BEAUTIFUL THURSDAY MORNING, BOYS
26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share …
many, MANY animals and a lighthouse in the middle of nowhere
27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
I’m REALLY insecure about my body xd
28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
LOVE feeling safe. 
29. Share an embarrassing moment in your life.
probably every time that i’ve ever worn a dress, because i really,, really dont like wearing dresses and that’s it
30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
last cried by myself this morning and last cried in front of another person at my friend’s birthday party
31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
no partner but if youre reading this im rly proud of ur attention span. gj buddy
32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
i think most things can be joked about after a certain amount of time, but like,, it has to actually be funny and it has to come from someone i know isnt serious about it. if a joke is made just for the purpose of being offensive and edgy, it’s never funny no tea just truth. 
33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
i’d regret not spending enough time with people that i love, not traveling as much as i should have, and also i’d regret not formally coming out of the closet to my family (they probably already been done knew but like. yknow). i came out to myself & the people closest to me a LONG ass time ago, but i’ve kinda seen what it did to my immediate family so im not too excited to do that to my extended family. if i’m not too much of a pussy, ill probably do it in the summer when i see them next, bc ive been meaning to for a while.
34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
is it bad of me to say my computer? i feel like everyone else has a much more meaningful answer lol. it would probably either be that or the papers i keep on my bulletin board, bc most of them hold a lot of sentimental value (also my prescriptions  would be a pain to get copies of)
35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
either of my parents because i dont want them dying before i reach the point where i can expect them to be happy for me when i marry a girl
36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
personal problems? what’re those lmfao dont have any srry try me again later
 i’m too much of a pussy to tag certain people so if you see this and I've had any sort of conversation with you, do it coward
(also @skity  @drawinintherain )
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jadecringecomp · 5 years
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jade, of course, is still trying to deflect rather than own up to anything at all. im too lazy for screenshots so youre going to have to deal with text for this one. you can see their post here though. and if receipts are needed they are most likely on the callout blog or you can come to me if you cant find them.
“uses their own dead grandma as leverage out of nowhere literally months after the original argument”
jade are you really that braindead. like youre still just proving my previous point. youre still practically shitting on me for it. i gave a reason as to why that night was so traumatic for me because you keep trying to make it seem “like it wasnt that bad” by your own words!
also like uh, jade. you yourself have used your aunt having cancer as a reason to just... excuse every single action youve done. so again, take that and choke.
“abuses their own bf/ex but its fine because he abused her first lolololol!!!”
jade i... honestly have no words. youre still defending a pedophile, and you even admit he abused me. like, yes, i cheated on him. but how does the fact he is a pedophilic abuser not process through your head. why are you so set on defending that. a genuine question.
“flips back and forth on whether they were actually abused or not whenever it benefits her“
theres... nowhere that even says that in the link you posted. are you posting that to still try and imply i lied about the abuse you inflicted upon me or...?
“refriends their own ‘abuser’”
ok well one jade, you still have no actual proof ive befriended broden at all. all you have is a like on a fucking post. really how braindead is it possible to be at this point.
and regarding bailey, i never called her my abuser. you were the one to do that. you said she abused me after i showed you screenshots of what went down between us. and whats worse after i even came to you and showed you the screenshots and you got involved with that mess?? you still wanna try and say what happened was fake. like you wanna call me two-faced, yet youre so quick to change your mind once you realize that person doesnt benefit you anymore. 
also! for someone whos a survivor of abuse, you sure as hell dont realize a common thing between us survivors is literally going back to those who’ve hurt them right?? like you keep bringing this up as if im fucking lying about the whole thing when im not since again, i came to you while we were friends with the proof. i can even post them if need be. and honestly it doesnt even fucking matter anymore ive broken contact with her after shortly realizing my mistake.
“denies other ppls abuse just because they doesnt like them and a few vent discord messages means they knows literally everything abt it“
i can admit to saying i denied your abuse because there is actual proof that you werent abused two years ago, not because i dont like you. do you really just think nobody will believe proof right in front of them jade??? do you think youre some perfect princess who can do no wrong???? like jade the proof is right @deeancie, @estweri, @honeykeis-callout, and even here. you really expect me to just not believe it if i didnt hate you. you honestly need some real fucking help if thats the case jade.
and really like. if you say your bf clams up when you go to him... what else am i supposed to believe. sure i can be wrong, but reading that shit can really make you wonder what is going on between you two. and jade you wanna say that like you yourself dont do that shit. remember all the times you read vague text posts and would go on a tangent as if you knew every little thing about what was going on in my life. yeah kinda what i thought.
“says grooming minors is talking to people One time“
i love how you fail to leave out the fact that these people were minors and that youre practically defending loli. so if youre still talking to these minors and since youre still defending loli, then yes youre grooming minors into thinking loli is ok.
“straight up let a minor into their porn server on discord (they can go as rabid about this as they want but they still straight up showed an actual minor graphic porn but IM a pedophile bc i rb anime sometimes lmfao)”
again its been resolved. like ive acknowledged it was wrong of me to do and ive changed it. and how can you say you just rb anime sometimes when. you literally are reblogging this kind of fuckshit. like do you not remember reblogging that obviously naked child in a collar or what. the difference is i realized my wrong and changed it while youre still rbing actual loli.
“lied about the relationship (the one where they abused each other and she cheated on him with her other abuser???) having elements of pedophilia because they lied about her age”
this is so... ive told you i forgot. the ages. i was literally an age off for the both of us. like what else do you want me to do about this.
“has sketchy as fuck ocs, including one thats physically ten who would force their adult self insert to be naked around them and also drew them being physically beaten“
while the first was true (but i dont have that oc anymore), where in the fuck did i draw them being physically beaten lole??? are you pulling this out of your ass to deflect you yourself rbing beaten children????
and i swear to god if you bring up this comic, im going to scream.
“is a stalker and an abuser. by their own logic“
ok like. a couple of things to this. jade when are you going to get it through your thick skull i didnt give a shit if you were lurking or not, it was the fact you would comment on my every move. which is stalking by the way and incredibly creepy like get a life!
and an abuser “by my own logic”. the link you shared, again, doesnt show that anywhere. also with how badly of a hypocrite you are, thats you. you told me it was abusive to call people delusional. you started doing that once i realized my wrong and stopped. you told me it was abusive. you told me making people relapse was abusive. yet once i relapse you still didnt give a shit and somehow that makes you in the clear (though i still dont give a shit we both literally did that to ourselves the point is youre an abuser too to your own logic). you said trying to gaslight people is abusive (which it is). look at the stacks of proof i have of you gaslighting me. like i could go on but all the proof if here on this blog.
“oh and dont forget they foamed at the mouth that i didnt instantly know when they changed their pronouns but has been proven to have Actually knowingly misgendered me for weeks“
jade the fact you were lurking should make it fucking obvious you should have known my pronouns. and for weeks?? jade i misgendered you in your callout, which i immediately changed once pointed out. will you please stop lying to make yourself look victim and just tell the truth for once in your life.
“also apparently i can call them rae and its not deadnaming because its not their birthname so“
oh my god youre literally fucking braindead it hurts to watch at this point. no rae isnt my deadname. but i do prefer not going my that. the whole point of that was that you tried screaming transphobia because someone called you by a previous name you went by. you fucking dumbass.
“claims to have bpd but doesnt even know what cluster b is holy shit!!!“
what do i even say to this jade?? what does the fact i didnt know what that was at first matter to me having bpd??? also are you just gonna shrug off the fact that you first claimed you got misdiagnosed with autsim, then suddenly you do? you claimed to have bipolar disorder, then later you suddenly decide you have bpd??? kind of sketchy if you ask me!
“tries to send anons under my name but forgot that their friend levi doesnt even have me blocked so why the fuck would i go on anon if i would ‘sign’ it anyway hm“
a....... are you implying i was the one to send those....? is it because you realized once you did so it backfired?? jade for someone who wanted to claim i was the one making up conspiracies, you sure make up a lot of them.
in conclusion: jade you still are just deflecting! you still havent defended any of the shit me or my friends have called you out for! the fact you still havent admitted to them or so much as even defended the claims sure does speak a lot! stop deflecting and lying and just fucking come out about it!
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