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#what a beautiful way to imagine it
blackkatdraws2 · 15 days
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The narrator and the ugly ahh protagonist [Blank Scripts AU/non-canonical]
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angstics · 1 year
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bewitching your own crew… help…
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spiterunsmylife · 2 months
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It really would be the funniest thing in the world for Zutara to be live action endgame
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mrsfitzgerald · 11 months
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28.05.23. video: @naraism 💗
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aquanutart · 6 months
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I absolutely LOVE the Squirtle/Wartortle illustrations by kantaro in Pokemon 151!
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The Squirtle jumping so joyfully from the rock into the ocean, the colors are STUNNING! I love the contrast of the Squirtle's aqua blue framed in the vivid orange sky, the soft bit of blue reflecting in its shell and its tail just catching the sun, how little and squishy its body looks as it launches itself towards the water with such tremendous excitement!
The lineless style of the background gives me the feel of a travel poster and I sense the tropical environment around it from the rocks and trees framing the corners, the waterfall splashing with as much energy as the Squirtle!
The layered blues on the surface of the water and the bubbles rising at the corner make me FEEL the liquid rising to meet the Squirtle--I can just feel how the next moment it's going to break through and be immersed in a cool island swim!
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And the Wartortle running along the sunset beach, this is somehow everything I always imagined for Wartortle! I adore the way the rich purple melts into the warm red/orange sky, the matching purple clouds and shadows in the foreground, and how the dimming sunlight glows red on Wartortle's deep blues!
I love how the yellow and orange of the sky illuminate the lapping waves, I can just feel the gentle motion of the sea at dusk. The aqua color of the ocean matches Wartortle's ears and tail and sets off the red-orange sand, I just love how the colors are here!
Wartortle looks so round and squishy, I love its happiness as it goes frolicking through the shallows, chasing the bubbles caught in the setting sun! The shine and deep shadow on its shell give it an almost jewel texture like real tortoise shell; I love the silhouetted splash Wartortle leaves as it goes running across the shore. It's so full of energy and delight at the end of a gorgeous day! The colors in these are SO vivid and harmonized and the style is so cute and bursting with energy and joy. I just LOVE it (also Squirtle is my starter)
#pokemon#pokemon tcg#long post#i have deep affection for bulbasaur as well though and i also love the bulbasaur/ivysaur cards in this set#i SO wish we'd gotten art of the final evolutions in the same style as the pre-evos' standard cards!!#(yes i do love the full art ones but i also love the illustrations on the standard cards!)#from the way the settings in these two were going; i would have imagined blastoise to be set at night (??)#i LOVE pokemon cards. i can't keep up with every set but i started collecting again now and then a few years ago#and 151 has really got me wanting the full set the way i haven't since childhood. SO many beautiful illustrations (but there always are)#it's like having little pieces of art of my favorite characters and it's only.. slightly... less expensive than actually commissioning ....#i KNOW it's less expensive to buy the individuals online but it's so much less fun#part of the fun is having YOUR own pokemon journey ((going to the store)) and seeing what YOU encounter ((when you open the pack))#i do buy them online sometimes but i usually dont form as strong associations with them as when i open a pack in a certain setting or place#i tend to try to save them to open right before a significant event like starting something new or a holiday. so that i form associations#and it's like 'oh that's the galarian obstagoon from when my mom came home for christmas'#and 'that's the snorlax who reassured me when i was hurt'#i don't buy them too often so i've got to make it count#anyway i know i should wait for the prices on this one to come down because it's absolutely ridiculous#i didn't buy anything at release because i was like $6 for one booster pack??? but i couldn't take just sitting and watching them sell out#i really like the poster because i can look at so many beautiful pictures all together#i could say stuff like this about literally every pokemon illustration (if i had time to write it out) and sometimes i've wanted to#i just chose these two because these are a couple of my original favorite pokemon and i just couldn't keep it to myself. i LOVE these
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blackbeardsemophase · 7 months
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i just thought of this but what if Stede shows up during the big storm (pelting rain, soaking wet Stede in his now transparent white shirt) that we think is going to happen and he and Ed are only briefly reunited for a few moments (thunder clap, lighting flashes that illuminate Ed's makeup stained face) before Ed's washed overboard and they don't get to say much of anything (eye contact, pained expressions, "stede 🥺?" "ed🥹?!") to one another until they are actually reunited when Ed is rescued toward the season's end?
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sysig · 6 months
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Heck yeah, Requestober!! Thanks for doing this again, it's always so much fun! I've got two TPoH ideas to choose from if that's alright, whichever you're more in the mood for. Either Dial annoying RGB, as he does, or Dial and Click being an awful chaos duo? Either would be great!
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Day 17 - Boundaries, Dial
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audhd-nightwing · 2 months
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OK HEAR ME OUT
BRETMAN ROCK = DICK GRAYSON
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burningtacozombie · 1 year
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Danny Pino paying his respects to Richard Belzer on Instagram and Twitter.
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hermidetta · 19 days
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Hello {BERNADETTA},
Thank you for subscribing to {THE DARK ART OF FANFICTION}. To learn more about our fell services, please visit us at: {https://xx0DIN_xDARKx.com}.
May darkness consume you! {ACHING BLOOD INCORPORATED} You cannot opt out.
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“what if i kill you?”
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jennifersminds · 2 years
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BONNIE BENNETT  Haunted - 1x07
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flowercrowngods · 10 months
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bard/knight snippet word vomit
“i have misstepped and trampled on your heart, and your life, and your… your pain so cruelly, my lord. steve.”
eddie falters, feeling the cold of the rain seep into his bones, but even the pouring stream is not enough to kill the fire within, this burning need for steve to know, the scalding sensation of those eyes trained so intensely on him.
“i have not the words to express the regret i am feeling, nor the guilt, at having wronged you so. i do not ask forgiveness, i— i can only hope that you believe me when i say that i am… deeply and endlessly sorry.“
eddie dares not ask for forgiveness. and he dares not hope to find it in lord harrington’s eyes that seem to soften just a fraction even as the rain intensifies and plasters the locks of his hair to his forehead. water drips from them to enticingly, all but inviting eddie to cradle his cheek so tenderly, and feel the wetness on his skin with a man who wandered deserts for weeks.
he dares not, not anymore. and yet the yearning in his heart still betrays him once more, making him want — for the real steve this time, not for the notion of grandeur and epic romance.
and it is more intense, thus, than the first time, leaving him with shaking hands and stuttering heart as the rain drenches them so thoroughly as though attempting to wash away their history and provide a fresh start.
and it grows in intensity when the lord swallows thickly before his eyes flicker down to eddie’s lips for just the fraction of a second. but it is a second that will cost him a lifetime, he knows, for eddie stops breathing now.
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cannibalmapleshade · 4 months
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miss mommy must murder
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A Day Late: A Beauty and the Beast Retelling
Beatrice scrambled through the rose garden, tripping over the deep gold skirts she'd worn specifically to look nice for her host. Where was Beast? He wasn't in the library, dining room, conservatory, aviary, music room, ballroom, study, parlor, billiard room, or any of the castle towers. She'd thought she'd find him brooding in a melancholy corner, awaiting her return, but she was running out of melancholy corners and beginning to get frustrated. Where could an eight-foot-tall dog-tiger-monkey man possibly hide?
The garden had changed. The usual balmy summer had become oppressively hot and humid. The roses drooped. The damp air clung to Beatrice's skin and red curls escaped her hairpins and frizzed around her face. Where were the sparkling sunshowers that kept the gardens moist? Where were the playful breezes that kept the air fresh and cool? Beatrice hadn't seen so much as a fluttering curtain to indicate the presence of an invisible servant. Everything was silent. Still. Dead.
Half-mad with anxiety, she raced down cobbled paths and across the wide lawns where she and her Beast had played so many games of croquet. Past fountains where they'd splashed each other in ferocious water battles. She trampled beds of pansies and tore holes in hedges and prayed the invisible gardener would forgive her. If Beast meant to get revenge for her delay in returning, he was doing an excellent job of it, but when--yes, when--she found him, they would have words about how a single day of waiting did not justify throwing your guest into a blind panic.
She checked every bench in the garden, navigated the entire hedge maze, and even took a raft to check the bottom of the lily pond. When she came ashore, she leapt a short hedge and found herself at the far end of the south lawn, where the lush grass gave way to rougher scrub as the palace grounds approached the surrounding woods. A creek babbled over stones, separating forest from palace, and not far from its bank, Beatrice saw a lump of tawny-striped fur covered in a familiar blue cloak.
Beatrice raced to Beast's side and found him barely conscious. His fur was dull, his eyes were glassy, and he panted in the heat. The sharp teeth sticking out of his pointed muzzle were as dry as his black nose.
Beatrice struggled to catch her breath, then gasped, "Beast! What happened?"
Beast lay curled up on his right side, legs bent to his chest like a newborn babe, while he clutched his long tail in one monkey-like hand. Softly, he said, "You broke your promise." 
How could he be so maddening? "It was one extra day! I haven't seen my family in nearly two years! I thought you could manage without falling into a melancholic decline!"
Beast squeezed his eyes shut and clenched his jaw against some internal pain. "I told you. Three days only. Or I waste away and die."
"I thought it was a metaphor! You know how dramatic you get!"
He shook his head. "Rules of this place."
Beatrice's stomach sank. Though the sun shone hot as ever, it seemed to Beatrice as though a cloud had blocked all the light. She didn't...he couldn't...
Had she killed him for one extra day at home?
She clenched her jaw to hold back tears, furious that she was even considering wasting time by crying.
Beatrice pulled off the Beast's cloak, revealing that he was clad in the loose white shirt and rough brown trousers he typically wore in the gardens. She knelt beside him and snarled, "You can tell whoever runs this place, from me, that I am sick to death of their rules." She started loosening the shirt's laces, grinding out words with each piece of the string she yanked from the bindings. "Life imprisonment because my father stole a rose. Required daily marriage proposals. No dessert unless you eat the vegetables first. And now this!" She pulled out the entire string and threw it aside in a huff. "And worst of all, you follow those rules. You call yourself a beast, but you're just a fluffy little chicken."
Beast grimaced, and sounded apologetic as he rasped, "Not like...those rules. Law...like gravity."
Oh, was he really going to lecture over semantics when he was dying? "And that one's breakable! Haven't you heard? There are men in the south who fly in balloons. You can break any rule you want if you've got enough gumption." She grasped his muzzle in her hands and turned his head so he met her eyes. "Do you understand? You are not going to die on me."
Even though he could barely hold open his eyes, a corner of his wide mouth twitched upward. Good. He had enough life in him to laugh at her. "I'll try."
"You will do more than try." She stood and looked around wildly, desperate for something that could help. Where were those servants?
"You're just overheated," she said, willing it to be true. "Nothing to do with me. You're the one who came out here covered in fur in this eternal July."
Water. She needed water. She rushed to the creek and cupped what she could in her hands. She brought it back to him and he lapped at the scant film of droplets that she managed to hold through her mad flight. It barely dampened the tip of his tongue, yet Beatrice rushed back to the creek again, again, again, not knowing what else to do and thinking that any water was better than leaving him here to fetch other tools. Knowing him, he'd die the minute she walked away.
She babbled as she worked. He couldn't die so long as she kept him distracted, right? "It was one extra day. I didn't think you'd mind. My eldest sister has a new baby. The smiling-est thing you've ever seen. Four months old. I nearly stuck her in my bag and brought her with me. I couldn't leave so soon when there were babies."
Beast lapped weakly at the water in her hands, his eyes shut, as if merely moving his tongue was exhausting.
"My father begged me to stay," she said, desperate for him to understand. "He's gotten so old since I last saw him. I was afraid he'd be dead before I got leave for another visit."
Now Beast lay dying, and all she could do was bring sips of water. There had to be a better way to help him.
Her eyes fell on the cloak and inspiration struck. She gathered it up in deep blue folds, carried it to the bank of the stream and dunked it beneath the water. She fumbled it, dripping, into a ball against her chest, then staggered back to where Beast lay and squeezed as much water as she could over his body.
That woke him up. All his limbs jolted and his eyes opened wide.
"Good," she said with triumph, mercilessly squeezing more water from the saturated cloak. "You wake up and pull yourself together."
She squeezed the last of the water onto his tongue, then carried the cloak back to the river, shouting back to him, "You're the only dog-tiger-monkey-man thing in existence, you know. If you die, you'll be responsible for the extinction of an entire race, and you don't want that on your conscience, do you?"
She dunked the cloak back in the stream, shivering from more than the cold shock of the water. I don't want it on mine.
What if this didn't work? What if he died? Would she be set free? Could she even call such a life freedom? What would her life be without his morning grumbling and his terrible jokes? Who would listen to her ramble about the books she never finished? Or try the bread recipes she burned? How could her life have any joy, without him there to ramble through the gardens with her, or trounce her at billiards, or put up new curtains in her room, or talk about...well, everything, in a way she could with no one else?
It didn't matter because he wouldn't die. She couldn't let him.
But there were things she had to tell him.
She hefted the water-soaked cloth, struggling to gather it in her arms. "You know what I decided, in that extra day at home? It wasn't home anymore. Oh, it's nice. My family's there. Good memories. But I was homesick that fourth day. For the palace. For you." She gathered a heavy fold of the cloak against her chest while another one slipped from her grasp. "It seems that I love you. And the very next time you propose, I plan to marry you."
If the situation hadn't been so desperate, Beatrice would have looked back to see Beast's reaction. After she’d refused him five-hundred and twenty-eight times, her acceptance would be a shock. It had shocked her, that night at home, to realize how much she missed the nightly proposals, and how slim her reasons for refusal were getting. 
Behind her, Beast said weakly. "You'll...marry me?"
The cloak slipped from Beatrice's arms, and she cursed under her breath. "Yes, you overgrown throw rug, but first you have to live long enough to do it."
That was unfair. He deserved an explanation. She reached under the water for the cloak, but the current pulled bits of it just beyond her grasp.  "You’re as much a prisoner here as I am, so I can’t blame you for that anymore.  Your face is kind of endearing, now that I’m used to it. And marriage doesn’t seem so terrible now, not if it’s with you. You’re much smarter and kinder and more fun than any of the human-looking men I know. And you’re much more patient with my temper and my tongue.”  
"Beatrice."
Beast's voice, filled with awe, sounded stronger. The dousing must have done him good.
She sprawled across the bank and flailed an arm beneath the water, catching a corner of the cloak. "You’re too good of a man inside to really be a beast. You said once you had human parents, didn't you?"
"Beatrice."
The cloak slipped away again. She stuck her arm in the current, almost up to the shoulder, and snapped,  "Will you quit distracting me?"
At last, she snagged one edge in her left hand and continued, "Not that I mind if you naturally look like that. You can’t help the way you were born. But have you ever considered that it could be an enchantment? Maybe we could find a way to break it, after we’re married.”
"Beatrice, look at me."
Beatrice was offended at the hint of laughter in Beast's voice. Enchantment wasn't a completely ridiculous idea, not in a place like this.
"I know what you look like," she snapped. She rose to her knees and pulled the wet cloak halfway out of the water. "Doesn't mean you always looked like that. Maybe you're enchanted and just forgot about it."
A heavy hand gripped her shoulder. A human hand. A male hand.
Beatrice shrieked and pushed the hand away, scrambling backward along the bank like a crab. A tall, olive-skinned, dark-haired man stood over her, grinning like a madman.
Beatrice glanced wildly around. How had he gotten here? Had he come from the forest? He looked rough enough, wearing nothing but a long white nightshirt. Someone's escaped lunatic relative? Or maybe he was the true master of this place, the one who'd made all those maddening rules.
She looked to Beast for answers--except that Beast was nowhere in sight. No sign of him save the matted grass where he'd been laying a minute ago. Beast had been weak. Vulnerable. Had this stranger finished him off? Perhaps she’d run out of time, and the rules of this place had dissolved what was left of him. 
She reached further up the bank and seized a fallen branch with a thick shaft and a spray of branching twigs. Madman or mad fairy, she wouldn't go down without a fight. She hefted her weapon, pitiful as it was, with all the menace she could muster in her small form. "Stay back!"
The stranger backed away, hands held protectively before him, but his eyes sparkled with laughter. "Beatrice, don't you recognize me?"
There was something familiar in his voice, which might explain how he knew her name. Cautiously, she rose, the branch still held protectively before her, to examine him more closely. Recognition flashed like a lightning bolt. "The narcissist!"
The stranger gaped. "Excuse me?"
Beatrice examined the features. She was right. She was sure of it. She'd know those green eyes and sharp cheekbones anywhere. The clothes were different and the hair was longer, but the face was identical.  "The man with all the portraits!"
How she and Beast had laughed over those portraits, which seemed to haunt every corner of the palace, far outnumbering any other faces in the artwork. The sitter could be seen wearing military dress in the foyer, riding clothes in the library, and evening dress in the ballroom. He had posed in summer, winter, and spring, and had been painted with hunting dogs in autumn. A child version of him had even posed, sulking, next to a standing globe in a portrait hung in a back hallway. She had privately dubbed the subject a narcissist–a man with so many portraits was far too in love with his own face. 
Now the vast array of portraits made sense. He was the master of the castle, maker of the magical rules, come to deal with her now that Beast was...no, he wasn't dead.
She brandished the branch again. "What did you do with Beast?"
"Nothing. You--"
She whacked him with the branch. "I did not kill him!"
He pushed the twigs out of his face and backed away. "Beatrice, my love, please!"
She whacked him in the stomach for that one. "I am not your love."
"Then why," he gasped, doubled over and wheezing, "did you just agree to marry me?"
Beatrice froze. What did he mean? Had he overheard...?
She was missing something here.
She discarded her theories and looked at the evidence afresh. Beast dying. Beast missing. Portrait man here. Wearing shirt a lot like Beast's that was far too big for him. Talking, now that she thought of it, in a voice remarkably similar to her Beast’s. 
She threw the branch aside. "I am the biggest idiot alive!"
The man caught his breath and stood upright, grinning ear to ear. Even his smile looked a bit like Beast's. "I'd agree," he said, in Beast's velvet, teasing tones, "except that I'm still living."
Beatrice leaped toward him, flung her arms around his neck, and buried her face in his shoulder. He smelled of sweat and mud and rotting fur. She’d never smelled anything sweeter. "I told you that you were enchanted."
#
Beatrice sat with her Beast on the riverbank as the sun sank toward the horizon. The enchanted high summer had given way to the mellow autumn of the outside world. A castle full of servants, now visible, roamed the grounds behind them, greeting each other with joy as they celebrated the end of the enchantment, but Beatrice had yet to move from the river’s edge. She had too much to discuss with her prince. 
Her prince. She still couldn't quite wrap her head around it. His Royal Highness Prince Matteo Adriano Edmondo Nicolo, twelfth son of King Inocenzo of Bellarosa, had rejected a fairy’s marriage proposal, and consequently found himself cursed into the form of a beast until a woman accepted his hand in marriage. 
“Was that all it took?” Beatrice exclaimed. “You could have told me sooner!” 
Matteo laughed. “It wouldn’t have been much of a curse if I could have told you.” 
“You could have hinted!” 
“Daily marriage proposals weren’t hint enough?” 
She laughed, acknowledging his point. “What a pair we make–a girl too dense to accept a prince’s proposal and a prince obnoxiously in love with his own beautiful face.” 
Matteo raised one of his perfect dark brows. “Why do you insist I’m vain?”
“Your royal highness, no one needs that many portraits of himself.” 
He threw his hands up in feigned distress. “I’m royal! My mother commissioned them!” 
“You didn’t need to display them so ostentatiously.” 
“You think I had a choice?” His manner suddenly became subdued. “The fae arranged that. Made it impossible to forget what I’d lost.” 
Beatrice took his human hand in hers. “I’m sorry I delayed so long.” 
He pulled her into an embrace. “I’d say you were right on time.” 
Her stomach twisted with guilt. She hadn’t been on time. 
She rested her head on his shoulder, still barely able to believe he was alive and well. She closed her eyes, trying to shut out the mental image of his dying beastly form. “What if I hadn’t accepted?” she asked. “Would you truly have died?” 
She felt the rumble of his answer in her own chest. “Yes.” 
“Why?” 
“Under the terms of the curse, I would remain a beast until you accepted my hand in marriage, or until you left and doomed me to death.” 
She looked up and gaped at him in amazement. “And yet you let me leave.” 
“I wouldn’t die immediately,” Matteo said, “and I couldn’t deny you the chance for happiness. So long as you returned before three days were over, neither of us would come to harm.” 
Despite the risk to himself, he had taken the chance. He had trusted her.
And she’d returned after four days. 
“I nearly killed you,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry.” 
“It’s not your fault. You didn’t know.” 
“I still should have come back when I promised.” 
He ran his thumb along her face. “Under the circumstances,” he said with a laugh. “I think I can forgive you for being a single day late.” 
She put her hands and his shoulders and met his gaze straight-on. “You really are far too forgiving.” 
“You saved me from my curse! I’d be worse than a beast if I refused to forgive you after that.” 
He’d left her such an easy opening. She couldn’t resist the chance to tease him. “You’re worse than a beast now, your highness. You’re not nearly so lovable without the tail."
He became strangely subdued at that.
“Beatrice,” he said at last. “Do you truly wish to marry me?” 
A natural question, perhaps, given her number of refusals. But she really wished he’d quit asking. "Of course I do. It broke your curse. What more proof do you need?"
He looked down, suddenly shy and earnest as a schoolboy. "Do you still wish it? You agreed to marry a beast, not a prince with too many portraits."
Beatrice laughed at that. She couldn’t help it. “How shallow do you think I am? If I agreed to marry you as a beast, I'm certainly not going to refuse you just because you have a little less fur."
His face eased. She was glad. She'd seen him in enough distress today. 
Another thought struck her. "Did you mean it? Do you really wish to marry me, or did you just propose to get your pretty face back?"
Matteo threw back his head and laughed. "Beatrice, darling, I've loved you since the day you tied a knot in my tail for defeating you at billiards.” 
Beatrice grinned, the last of her doubts flying away. "Then it’s settled. I'll marry you, you'll marry me, we both love each other. Does that sound right?"
Matteo pulled her in for a kiss. "That sounds like an excellent plan."
When they pulled apart, a cool wind came off of the river, and Beatrice shivered.
"I wish I had a cloak to offer you, but someone threw mine in the creek," Matteo said.
"You're terrible!" Beatrice said, but she accepted his arm and his escort back toward the palace.
As they crossed the south lawn, Beatrice said, "You know, I'll have to go back to my father's soon. Someone has to tell my family about the wedding."
Matteo nodded. "Of course. Under one condition."
She pulled away and looked up at him in exaggerated disgust. "More rules? I thought we were done with all that."
He waved a hand to dismiss her protests. "I think you'll find these conditions acceptable." He numbered his points on his fingers. "You may return if I can accompany you. And this time, you can stay as long as you like."
"That's two conditions."
"Do you object?"
Beatrice took his arm and continued walking toward the lighted palace. It was good to be home. "Not at all."
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cinna-bunnie · 3 months
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u ever hope an ex is doing good then hear about the direction their life went and it's all just fucking tragic
#i got A Lot of tea from my coworkers who used to b friends with her on lunch bc we share my office#and we went in complete opposite directions. she's changed so much it's kind of scary even to her friends#she cut off all her queer and trans friends and said “[her] values have changed” and agrees with things her idiot toxic boyfriend#says when it's like girl this is SO so disappointing i know u know better. you are so much better than this u deserve sm better than this#i don't know if she's actually gone Full Catholic but she's extremely family oriented n her family is Mexican Catholic iykyk#it was a big problem in our relationship bc I'd only get to see Other People once every couple of months 😓#anyways new dude is extremely machismo and even by those standards he's Far on the aggressive side it's really scary#she even wants to get married and have kids but like the scenes he makes and the way he blows up on her and makes her cry#really hurts my heart to learn about. she's such a beautiful smart and sweet girl i was hoping she'd figure out what she wants for#herself after we split. and i don't wanna make assumptions about her thought process but it sounds like she got more reliant on her#fam not less to the point that even her friends were stressed about it and aksjdkak. i could see how someone who#has the energy and desire to go to Everything and gets along great w ur fam is nicer compared to like.#a trans woman who feels like a caged animal and is constantly begging for rest she never gets#but are all the sacrifices you're making worth it? there is zero “haha that sucks” it's just. tragic. u cut off ur childhood best friend for#being enby?? I'd imagine she doesn't feel “lonely” but god she sounds trapped and i worry for her#but otoh hearing who she turned into really gave me closure bc no fucking way would i want to date someone like this...#and that is a nice thing to heal inside of me albeit healing from something fucked up#just the thought of “maybe. one day” till y'all have changed so much u can't recognize and don't want each other#i assumed she wasn't the same person anymore bc i wasn't but hoped she changed for the better. but 😐 ig not. idk.#I'm gonna have complicated feelings on this all day im At work and can't focus lol
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derpinette · 9 days
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i have this "alter ego" that only exists in my head where essentially i am a fat sloppy drunk old fisherman with no loved ones living in misery & isolation & i often imagine myself as him especially in moments of patheticness
#& he is always a fisherman not a farmer not a fisherwoman either ( too badass... )#past life ?! caus my ��azn side was all fishers & stuff like my grandfather ETC but like all of them looked anorexic instead of fat so#also i imagine the guy as kind of vaguely mediterranean looking so maybe not because that side of my family are mountain farmers#when i read the old man & the sea ( i hate hemingway BTW ♯NotPete ♯ActuallyMikey ) ( uhm sorry about that... )#i was like this is my life/future if it was better... 🚬 But that was a good while after i was already thinking of myself like that#closest thing i felt to a kin moment is when we analyzed miss brill like wow me & i am not even old that is genuinely just my life#as a (at the time) seventeen year old. & also carol ledoux from repulsion literally 100% only i am an ugly freak instead of beautiful#i pretty much never think of myself as myself in my head & actually never when i was younger up until age 9 i remember vividly#& i just had this thought while making my lazy “bite sized” onigiri ( bowl of seasoned rice +tunamayo +vache qui rit +avocado +spoon )#but even when i make the non lazy version i get so overwhelmed & irritated & SLOPPY i feel like a drunk old man with nothing to#live for#anyone else feel like this sometimes...#if any of you weeaboos judge my terminology by the way i will kill myself just FYI#IDCCCC about the actual name you know what i mean. quasi poke bowl but each “component” has its own dish. whatever OK...
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