#were given an assignment with it i crumpled it up because i didn't want to write anything down i didn't want to admit if i was low on self

[masterwords]

running toward nothing (epilogue)

Summary: Hotch is injured in an explosion while on overseas assignment, putting Derek in a difficult position both with the team and with Spencer who has spent the last few months inadvertently falling in love with him. (Set around 07x01 - It Takes a Village but canon divergent by a lot.)

Warnings: rehab, depression. mention of seizures

Words: 3.5k

Pairings: Hotch/Morgan

Notes: This is for @tobias-hankel’ s Spencer Whump Challenge. My assigned prompts to do my evil with were Derek Morgan & Betrayal. We did it. We got here. It's the END! Sorry it took me so damn long, but I hope it was worth it. We have here a tearful reunion, a wedding and some other fun things...finally a little reprieve from the shit show.

CHAPTER LIST

Read on AO3: Running Toward Nothing

**

Derek was a stress eater.

Hotch knew that about him before he knew anything else for certain. It really didn't take a profiler to pick that up. It was how he figured Derek out long before he realized he was interested in figuring Derek out. When he was flown home from Pakistan, the first thing he remembered smelling was something sweet...a donut Derek had been given from the nurse's station that he was pacing and eating, dropping tiny sprinkles on the floor. Somehow he knew, long before he opened his eyes and made contact, that it had to be Derek.

The donut was followed by a barrage of snacks, sweet and savory, as he sat by the bed side and willed Hotch to get better, to come home. And once he was home? Their kitchen became a convenience store. Because Derek Morgan was a stress eater and no one could stand in his way.

So when he picked Emily up from the airport at 8pm after a long flight from London and asked where she wanted to eat, she knew better than to give him anything too specific. He had that look about him. “Tacos,” was all she said. It had been months since she'd had a really good taco. Of course, Derek didn't get the memo on the “good” part...only taco. She would much rather have found a food truck that would throw six street tacos in styrofoam for her and a gallon of hot sauce to drench them in but Derek clearly had other plans.

It really pissed him off when Emily pointed out that it was his tell, too. Hotch was one thing. They lived together, they woke up to one another's morning breath and went to bed next to the other's sweaty body, of course Hotch would pick up on the food thing. But Emily? Unfair.

“Nope,” he replied to her rather rude comment about him eating his feelings, crumpling up the wrapper for his third crunchy taco. Shreds of cheese and iceberg lettuce fell to his lap like delicious confetti and he would let it collect there and brush it off once he was ready to get out of the car. He had more eating to do. “Not even close. I just had a craving. Yo quiero Taco Bell and shit, you know.”

“Yeah?” Emily asked, handing him the next from the bag. He was driving, she was navigating, though he didn't really need a navigator. She was nitpicking every road he chose to get to their destination, and the only reason he let it slide was that she was holding all of the food. It wasn't like she wasn't eating her fair share, either. A bad taco was still a taco, and she was still starving. Maybe also a little drunk from the in flight wine she'd consumed a little too boldly.

She'd disappeared after that night in the hospital, taken her ass right to Strauss to let her know she was returning to Interpol and that Clyde had already worked up her transfer. It was a done deal. Sure, she'd intended to stick around but seeing Hotch like that had almost broken her heart. She really did want to see him again...she planned to go see him in his room...but she couldn't. Instead she found herself on a red eye flight out of Virginia, no looking back.

Well, not exactly.

The idiots, her idiots, had to go and make a life changing decision and she couldn't very well miss it. So now she's got a party size bag of tacos in her lap and Derek telling her he was glad to see her and that Hotch wasn't mad at her for leaving. No one was, in fact. Somehow after everything happened, they all understood.

“You sure this has nothing to do with...”

“Woman. Taco me.” He smiled at her and waggled his finger, ready for another. He avoided her question which was enough to tell her that it was exactly the problem. He was nervous. Getting married in the morning. Real, official married.

Derek Morgan, the man she once referred to as a dog on the dance floor, was going to stand before a judge and...she was about to cry about it. She loved to call them wusses, but she was just as bad.

Right now he was taking Emily back to his place, into a house full of Hotch and Jack and Fran and Jessica and Sean. His sisters would fly in the next day, just in time for the party. Everyone who he loved under one roof, give or take one or two. Penelope was across the country visiting Spencer in Las Vegas, he'd opted to do his inpatient rehab stay there closer to his mother, and now he was finishing his leave there while the Bureau decided what stance it would take on his reinstatement. JJ had visited him once, but it was Penelope who was keeping those lines open. Penelope who pushed for them to mend what was broken.

Penelope had appealed to Hotch on his behalf, pleading for him to go easy on Spencer when he pressed charges. Settling out of court on things that would help Spencer get better, not punish him. Where Hotch was soft, Derek was hard. He wasn't getting past it.

Derek wasn't speaking to her as often as he used to, unable to figure a way into forgiveness. He loved Spencer still and couldn't just look at him and pretend he felt a certain way when he didn't. It was all or nothing...he would speak to Spencer when he had forgiveness in his heart.

“You're getting married in the morning,” Emily pointed out abruptly and the car jerked beneath her. She smiled. Direct hit. “To Hotch.” A sharp intake of break, another direct hit. Two more and she could sink his battleship. “Are you ready to take that on for real? He's a real pain in the ass...”

“I'm the one that asked.” That much was true. And he hadn't changed his mind, not even a little, but there was so much more to it. He'd already made the commitment years ago, he was just signing his name on a paper in the morning. Putting on a show for everyone else's benefit, so that they knew what he'd known all along.

“What is it then?”

“I'm just...” he started, opening his hand for another taco. Four or five now? She'd lost count. Pulling the car over, into a deserted parking lot, he killed the engine and listened to it tick itself to sleep. “I always figured Spencer would be my best man. Up until a few weeks ago that kid was the best friend I ever had. And now I don't even want him around me.” He paused, and she almost thought he might cry but he just took a bite instead. Half of it spilled in his lap and he barely seemed to notice. “It's weird that he won't be there.”

“You could have invited him.”

He laughed, his mouthful dangerously close to spraying out of his mouth before his hand flew to his face to cover it. How dare she. “Em,” he muttered, chewing furiously and swallowing. “Jerk.”

“What? It's true. There are no rules.”

“Oh yeah. I'm just gonna send him an invite and when Hotch sees him it's gonna be all cool right?”

“Is Hotch still...” She didn't know how to finish that. Mad? Hurt? Broken? Because he was, when she last saw him, sort of just...broken. Like a beloved toy opened on Christmas morning and left in the summer garden, the fun worn on its edges. Beaten, abused, loved but just...broken. Sometimes it could be cleaned up and made new again, but other times it was just...gone.

“He's better, Em.” Like he was reading her mind, he looked at her seriously. “Really. His head's still a little wonky and he uses the cane most days but he's better. Strauss let him come back part time, just desk jockeying and some teaching. We got an Agent out on family leave so Hotch took some of his morning classes and he's home by lunch time. He's just gone the hours Jack is in school...” he sucked in a quiet wistful breath and smiled. “He usually takes a nap while Jack does his homework, and we all have dinner together.” She thought it sounded nice. Like things were good.

“Bet he hates it.”

“You better believe it. But we take walks in the evening and he's been swimming a lot. He lets me work him out...he's gonna get back to it, Em. I know it.”

She was silent for a moment, considering the severity of his injuries. A flash of what he looked like in the hospital, so helpless, and what he sounded like...she couldn't help the words that nipped at her tongue. “And if he doesn't?”

“He will.”

“And...if he doesn't?”

Derek huffed and dug around in the bag for a taco in the crumpled mess of wrappers while he contemplated the complicated answer to that question. “Then we figure it out. If you're asking whether that affects my wanting to marry him, I hope you think higher of me than that.”

She laughed. “I do. It's just...something to consider.” Something she thought about all the time. She'd been so scared, listening to him stutter his way through words, watching him struggle to open his eyes only to give up and keep them closed. He could barely lift his hand. Yeah, they told her it was temporary, a side effect of the seizure and that made sense...but what if there were more seizures? What if this was his life? She'd thought about calling and offering to move in with them for a while. Give Jess and Sean a break. Help Derek. But it made her stomach cramp to think about it and she couldn't make herself dial that damn number. She was here now though right?

“Has he had any more seizures?”

“Em, he's good. You'll see.”

What she saw, she would not exactly classify as good but he was better and she could at least see him this way instead of in that damn hospital bed when she closed her eyes. He leaned heavy on his cane when he walked and his gaze was a little unfocused, so opposite what she was used to out of Hotch and his hawk eyes. He wouldn't be winning any sharpshooter competitions this way, but he was upright and he spoke without the stutter. His hands didn't shake when he pulled her against him for a hug.

He'd never done that before, either. He shifted his bad leg out like a kickstand and lifted the cane so he could wrap entirely around her, and out of the corner of her eye she watched Derek slide around him, there to catch him if anything happened. He didn't know what to say to her, or how to say it. Really he assumed he'd never see her again. That visit in the hospital felt more like a fever dream than reality and if it wasn't for Sean's constant reassurance that it happened, he could easily tell himself it didn't. It also felt incredibly final. Like she'd gone and died again, only this time it was for real.

“You left.”

“I told you I was going to...”

“But you said you'd come see me again.” He knew that much. In the real dream, she'd promised to see him and she didn't. “You didn't.” She sniffled and tried to pretend she wasn't crying into his sweater. The navy blue one she loved on him, the one she'd stolen more than once when they were on the road and sharing a room. The one he'd bought three of just in case one of these times she didn't give it back.

“I couldn't. I'm sorry.” It was the damn truth. The last thing she could do was lie to him, not now. “But I'm here now. Flew halfway around the fucking globe just to watch you say some stupid words in front of a judge.”

She anticipated a snarky reply. Instead, she just felt his tears in her hair. “Thank you.”

The wedding was short, uneventful, simple. No handwritten vows or flowers, just a quiet courtroom and a few witnesses. Fran insisted on seeing her son be married, and Jess and Sean argued the entire way to the courthouse about who got to be the second witness to sign the paper. Sean won by virtue of sharing a last name, though Jess insisted she was a better sister than he was a brother. He didn't argue that point and still won. That turned out alright because she got to stand in the back with Emily and Jack and Derek's sisters who surprised everyone by getting on an earlier flight, each of them crying and pretending they weren't.

The reception at Rossi's was a quiet affair. People shoulder to shoulder, a live band playing jazz, food in every direction you looked but it wasn't a real party. Derek had insisted that it stay quiet, Hotch was still not in a place that he could be overstimulated without consequences and the last thing anyone wanted was for his wedding night to be a disaster.

And it wasn't. He danced with Derek, and then he danced with Emily...and then Jessica nabbed him, then finally Fran. She kept him for a few rounds, slow and peaceful and quiet. Emily had wanted to talk, so had Jessica but Fran only wanted to say one thing: that she was glad Derek found him and she called him son. He spent the next two songs trying to hide the tears everyone knew he'd been crying all day. He stayed with Fran as long as he could stand upright, until Derek insisted he take a break and sit down.

His phone rang against his thigh and Derek planted a kiss to the top of Hotch's head, told him to stay put, and left to go answer the call. It was important, probably the only person who could drag him away from his handsome husband sitting alone at a table with a slice of cake and some sort of goofy half smile permanently fixed on his features. Derek hadn't seen him smile like this in ages, and he hated to leave but the call was important.

It was Penelope.

“Hey sugar,” he said, ducking around the side of the house and standing beside the pool. Its reflective surface glittered under the stars, flickering like blue flame. “What's crackin?”

“I just wanted to call to see how everything went! The pictures Emily sent were...I cried like a baby.”

He smiled and slipped out of his shoes, rolling up his pants to his knees. He hadn't sat down in hours now, just wandering around being congratulated and eating food and drinking probably way too much champagne. He wasn't exactly drunk but he was hovering close. Everyone wanted a toast, everyone wanted a moment with the happy couple. He'd been attached to Hotch for much of the time but then came the dances and those went separate. Dunking his feet into the cold water, he hissed and pulled them up again, next dipping the heels and then slowly easing them in for the second time. It was freezing.

“How's Vegas treatin' ya?”

“No, no, Derek Morgan. You don't get to change the subject and make this about me. Oh hey wait a minute...is it Derek Hotchner now? Or is it Derek Morgan-Hotchner...omigod did you guys hyphenate?”

He laughed and wiggled his toes under the water, watching the way the surface rippled in delight.

“We're not messing around with last names silly girl.”

“Oh.” She scrunched her nose and peered at him through her camera, wishing she was beside him, wishing she was hugging him. “I always thought I'd be at your wedding. Of course I always thought it would be to me, too....”

“Oh sugar.”

“No, no, I made my choices. I expect you to make it up to me at a later date but I'm good with this.” She was staying with Spencer, helping him settle back into life on the outside. He'd really been hit hard after the accident, his entire life went up in flames and he was rebuilding everything. He needed someone in his corner, and no matter what she had to give up, Penelope committed to being that person. No one else seemed willing. “It's on video, right?”

“That was Emily's job.”

He kicked his feet in the water and listened to her tell him about Vegas, about Spencer. It made his stomach hurt but he didn't ask her to stop, he did care. In some hard to reach, distant way he cared.

“Do you want to say hi?” she asked someone off camera and Derek felt his heart stop beating. The world went silent and pressed in on him. “Come on.”

Spencer looked thinner. Dark under the eyes, paler. His hair was longer and unkempt but it seemed to be his desired look, not just a lack of care for his appearance. It looked intentional.

“Hey,” Spencer said, forcing a half smile and a half wave that reminded Derek of the first time they met. Gideon parading DOCTOR Spencer Reid through the BAU like the prize pig of the country fair. “Congratulations.” The sound in his voice was woody and forced, not genuine in the slightest. Penelope elbowed him and he tried to loosen up a little.

“Yeah...thanks...” Derek replied quietly around the painful lump in his throat. “How are you kid?”

Spencer looked down and Penelope stared hard at Derek, like he'd asked the wrong question and he'd be lying if he said it didn't make him bristle. “I'm alright.”

“He's doing well,” Penelope helped. She wanted to believe things could be normal again so badly she was willing to put it all on the line to get there. “Almost back to being the boy genius I know.”

“Yeah? Good for you. I'm glad.”

“Me too,” came a gentle voice from behind Derek. Moments later, through the sounds of shuffling and a painful grunt or two, Hotch's face appeared on the screen beside Derek's. It didn't take long before his head was resting against Derek's shoulder, and then Derek was draping one arm around Hotch's shoulders to pull him closer. Leaning against Derek's chest heavily, he let his own feet dip into the water. They dangled their bare feet side by side, twisting their ankles together, and Penelope thought they looked exactly as happy as she'd ever dreamed. For both of them. “Hi Spencer.”

“Sir! Hi! Congratulations!” Penelope squealed, but Derek never took his eyes off of Spencer and the white hot rage that smoldered in his eyes. He looked more alive now than he had during the entire rest of the conversation.

“Hotch,” Spencer said, both a greeting and a statement. “Congratulations.” He didn't say it convincingly enough that anyone believed it, but he was trying. No one was fooled. It was followed quickly by a half-assed excuse to get off the line before he had to continue to pretend to be happy for them when all he really wanted was for Rossi's house to light on fire and for all of them (except Derek) to perish. Okay, he didn't really want that but the anger was still there and the hurt felt fresher the longer he went without an escape. The longer he had to dwell on things from far away. He had to be off the call before he was asked to join a toast to their life together, built on betrayal and lies, while he was fresh out of rehab. Sleeping on a thin mattress in a white room waiting for his tray of mac n cheese with white bread slightly toasted and mushy broccoli, dessert of some lovely colorful pills in a little white cup. Red and blue and yellow, confetti to make his brain compliant, to make his body too tired to rebel. They'd been planning a wedding while he was rotting alone. Yeah, he could be in prison, this was better...his mother was just down the road and he could go visit her when he wanted. Penelope was coming to visit him every chance she got. All in all, things weren't so bad even if Derek was married now and even if he might not ever be able to come back to the BAU. There was really only one thing that troubled him through the fog of the party pills in his cup. One thing that started about a week into rehab and hadn't let up since.

His headache had come back and it was a real screamer.

#aaron hotchner #derek morgan #spencer reid #emily prentiss #penelope garcia #criminal minds #hotchgan #mortch #criminal minds fanfiction

[diomedrian]

...does anyone else feel like if they got better they’d be doing something wrong? especially after a relapse, like a disservice to what was keeping you going before it fell apart again? like you’re betraying everyone including yourself by getting better the way you are? like you’re betraying your own trauma by getting better in the same place that caused it/its rooted in? 

#i. i feel better i feel a lot better than i have in months?? but then. i am like its because i am home and i am not doing anything #most of my anxiety comes from being at home bc my parents never let me do anything so you see. i am still seven and i need my dad to make #every call for me and i need mum to make me tea. i am not 22 when i am home and altho i did get better. i got a lot better in 2018/19 and #it was wonderful. i loved that and i loved travelling to offices to get my visa stuff sorted and to get to know everyone and i was #confident and i have never had a good self esteem and i think its because when in seventh grade when we had a workshop on self esteem and #were given an assignment with it i crumpled it up because i didn't want to write anything down i didn't want to admit if i was low on self #esteem let alone what was causing it. and i am not very confident and i have an awful amount of anxiety - to the point that i felt #i felt like i couldn't do the diss and ended up with a ptsd that is only now beginning to look like i will be okay from and i will have to #repeat my master's so like. anyway the point was i am home and i am feeling better and i feel like i am undoing the progress i made before #the relapse. #because that progress was good. i was independent and i didn't cry as much and i handled all my paperwork and i made friends easy and i was #open to every new experience and i was driven and focused and. now. i am not? i am none of those things and i am so scared that this time i #recover it will be...in line with my parents which is to say i will be confident because i have them and not in spite of them and #i know how good it is to have parents who have your back (its very complicated and i am trying to use the nicest words) #but its also scaring me to bits bc i dont want to be like that. i want to be independent and work thru that. being around my parents...is #i get dependable. as one is bound to. i dont want to wake up at seven bc if its late than they will be angry i want to wake up at seven bc #i can and i like doing that. it just feels like crap to get better in a place that i know can only offer me limited growth but that if i go #outside and try growing i will crumble and have to come back to start again bc all growth starts here #its...like a trap? not sure if i am explaining it right but its just. so messy? i want to get better but it also cannot happen until i #exist outside of this house yknow? bc otherwise i will always always fall apart. its just the way its built. you stay away from it too long #and you see everything that is wrong with you and then your growth doesn't feel like growth but that something you put on and suddenly it #doesn't fit and look awfully ugly and everyone's laughing at you and no one believes you and even tho you made it yourself you know its the #crappiest sweater ever and you need to get out of it and so you burn it down and then you realize you have to start over again but #you are exhausted from the fire so you take time away and then you feel better so you head to the store to get the yarn again bc you burned #it all used it all up on the sweater and the wool comes at a price. and without the wool there is no sweater. so like. what do u do. #anyway i m v sorry if this was confusing and you read all of it for nothing. and i am also v sorry about how long the tags got lao #personal

[attackonmango]

|Party of Five|Jean x Reiner x Reader x Marco x Bertholdt|Smut|

|This is a pretty long, disgusting and sexual one shot, that I wrote to The Take. It will be upward of a few thousand words, so I hope you like long, smutty chapters. Party of 5, right this way ;)|

"Go clean the showers, brat; you used them last," Levi ordered as he stopped by your room to assign your latest late-night chore. You tried your hardest not to groan out loud. It would help if you had listened to your roommate Ymir who told you to wait until morning.

"Aye, Aye, captain," you muttered, cursing him in your head as he left your shared quarters.

Heading to the supply closet, you grab two dozen handmade rags, a few buckets and a bunch of cleaning products.

The walk to the shower building wasn't far, thankfully. Though the sun has been down for a few hours, the summer air was still suffocating.

"I guess I'd rather be cleaning the showers than shovelling horse shit," you mutter as you pass by the smelly barn. You were laughing to yourself as you listen to Sasha and Connie argue, irritated due to the vile fumes that their masks couldn't protect them from.

As you make it to the showers, you hear laughter inside, and as you open the doors, it only gets louder.

You see Reiner, Jean, Bertholdt and Marco, chasing each other with towels. You watch as they pop each other with them, screaming when it came in contact with their skin.

As Jean and Bertholdt ran past you, Bertholdt popped you with a towel though he aimed for Jean. You cried out in pain, laughing due to shock. "Damn! That shit hurt." you scoffed, partially playing.

"I'm sorry, Y/N," Bertholdt apologized profusely as he squinted his eyes, scratching his neck. His face flushed red as he looked at you with embarrassment.

Nodding, you raise your hands to put space between the two of you, "Just don't hit me anymore, accidental or on purpose." you laugh, and he joins in shyly.

"I'm guessing Levi set you to clean the girl's showers?" he asked, creating small talk to avoid awkward silence. He was thankful you had forgiven him so quickly.

"Yea, I'm gonna be here for a while. Not as long as you guys tho, I hear it's pretty bad in there." you laugh to yourself. That rumour has been floating around for a while since training began.

"It is; we've been here since six” Bertholdt exasperated. You both part ways, Bertholdt back on the hunt for Jean.

For the next two hours, you wipe up the wet floors, clean off the mirrors and toilets. You moped and began to clean individual showers. You made sure to make everything pristine as white, exactly how Levi likes it. You didn't want to be back down here tomorrow.

Something tells you that the boys would though, their laughter and the sounds of them running echoed of the walls. They definitely weren’t cleaning. Sometimes you'd see Jean, looking for the rag he lost hours ago. Reiner and Bertholdt rough housing like usually and Marco trying to get everyone to remain on task.

Suddenly in ran Marco, wailing as he raced from Reiner who carried a sloshing bucket of clear water. “I’m just trying to get out of here early? Whats so wrong with that?” Along with “I’m sorry, is that what you want to hear?”

You watch as Marco rans in your direction as Reiner braced himself to throw the clean water. “Hey chill out! I just wiped the floor.” You scold in protest.

Reiner shook his head, adamant that he do what he planned. “A little bit of water never hurt no body.” After that, everything went in slow motion. Marco slipped behind Y/N as the water splashed down on her.

"Yah!" You cried out as Reiner attempted to splash Marco with an entire bucket of water, but he moved out of the way as cold water pierced your skin; the boy's eyes widened as they drifted towards you. Their laughing came to a halt as they started. "Oh shit, " Reiner and Marco exclaim as they still their feet.

Plenty of the water splashed into your mouth and nose, causing you to cough it up. Hacking in front of Marco and Reiner, as your eyes pricked with tears. “Assholes.” You muttered before groaning loudly.

Reiner and Marco swallow thickly as they notice your tears of distress. Too bad they lacked sympathy, as you looked too good for them to care.

"I told you guys to fucking cool it, now I'm wet," you scold them as the shirt clung to your skin. You ran your hands through your hair as you sighed, frustration coursing through you. If looks could kill, they’d be dead because you were pissed.

You pay no attention to Jean and Bertholdt as they walk over to the girl showers, not noticing the way their eyes bulged in their sockets.

You watched as a blush crept up Marco's cheeks as he looked the other direction, refusing to make eye contact, Jean's mouth ajar, both surprise and pure happiness etched on his features.

"Hello, excuse me?" you glared as your hands landed on your hips, as one side jutted out. You turned to glare at Reiner, who grinned, staring intensely at your chest as Bertholdt turned around to avoid your gaze altogether.

Suddenly you shivered, glancing down; you notice you had a white shirt on. A wet white shirt on. "Oh shit!" You cried out, hands flying to cover your breast that we're on full display.

You couldn’t turn away because they stood around you on all sides, and someone would get a eyeful of tits. The best you could do was hiding them behind your arms and hands.

You laughed nervously, absolutely flustered, "Advert your eyes." Your face flushed as you shifted on your feet. Your heart raised as the situation set in. Reiner had exposed you while targeting Marco in front of the 4 of them while they gaped at you. Glancing around, you couldn't help but notices the pitches in their shorts.

"They look great, " Jean chuckled, raising a brow at you. He felt no shame as he drank in your figure. Jean always thought you were sexy. The way your breast filled your shirt, he noticed the way they bounced as you ran.

Reiner visibly cringed, tossing his head back with laughter. "You sound creepy, horse face." Reiner stalked towards you, his eyes flickering from your chest to your bottom lip that you had sucked between your teeth, chewing it until it had gotten red. The look in his eyes weakening your taut knees.

"And you're not?" Jean shot back at Reiner, who ignored him.

"My apologies, Y/N, that bucket was for Marco, " Reiner muttered huskily as he hooked a finger under the hem of your shirt as water dripped down your thighs, tugging harshly. The way he towered over you had you reeling.

Marco loved how plush your thighs were; though he was a gentleman, he isn't innocent. He could see himself dying happily with his head in between them. He couldn't curb the pang of jealousy that washed over him as Reiner toyed with your shirt. You were petrified and enticed as he did so.

You have always found Reiner attractive, as well as the other boys in the room. You had watched thrm grow from boys to men over tge last few years. So his proximity and gaze caused heat to pool in your pants, as you drank in his Earthy scent. His cool breath wafted across your face and the cold water he dumped on you. It didn’t help as the other peered down at you like predator ready to jump on prey. But that’s what this was, wasnt it.

Reiner's next question caused your jaw to drop, "Would you let us take you right here?" You hadn't noticed how close the boys had gotten, Jean and Reiner more so than the others. Reiner lifted his hand to cup your face, his callous hand tracing stars on your cheek.

Your eyes widened as you stared in shock, stepping back until someone pulled you into them, "I-" a hand groping your hip stole your will to speak.

"I bet she would, " Jean purred in your ear, as he pressed himself against you from behind. His clothed length rutting against your full bottom, he massaged your hips, causing your mind to race. "Don't say you haven't thought about it, love, having your brains fucked out while we use you." Jean wasn't wrong; you constantly thought of having to be under them while they ravaged your body, using up whatever they pleased. You thought of all the possibilities of dirty things they could do to you. But you never thought you’d do anything with one of them, in front of the rest of them. And you definitely didn’t think you’d be with all of them at the same time.

You find yourself absent-mindedly backing into Jean, loving the way his length prodded your butt. His fingers dig into your waist as he sensually moved his hips. "See, she's eager." Jean chuckled darkly as he reaches to grab a full fist of hair. He anchors your head, causing you to stare up at Reiner through hooded eyes. "Tell him, slut." You couldn't fight it as you were filled with desire. Usually, that word would hurt your feelings, but given the situation and opportunity at hand, it made you want more than a bit of friction.

Reiner looked down at you, his eyes soft as he waits for your answer. "It is the least you could do," your lashes flutter as you pull away from Jean enough to slip your sodden shirt off. Catering to your nerves, you covered yourself the best you could until Jean pulled your hands away.

"Definitely," Reiner muttered as his hands wander your upper body. Dropping to his knees, he guided your exposed breast into his mouth. His tongue swirled around your sensitive nipple as he tugged, nibbling slightly. You feel him grin as your breathy moans escape you, as you shuddered under their touch. Jean's palms were kneading your ass in his hands. He smirked as you crumple in him and Reiner's grasp as he mutters what he plans on doing to you.

You don't protest as Jean pulled your pants down, lifting your legs out of them. They were quickly discarded since they were no longer needed, along with your panties. His long fingers playing at your entrance.

Your hands danced around in Reiner's hair as he suckled on your bust. As you moaned softly, you tried your hardest not to push his head, but to no avail.

"Slow down, baby, " Reiner muttered as he pulled away, spit trailing from his lips to your sensitive bud, his eyes dilated as he palmed himself through his shorts. "You'll get what you want." The authority in his voice caused your core to dampen; you rub your moist thighs together to ease your desire. You nodded at him, signaling you understand.

“Atta girl,” he muttered, his thumb brushing over your cheek, wiping away water. A pout falls upon your lips as he pulled away too fast for your liking.

"Take these off, " Reiner ordered, referring to his clothes as he pinched your erect nipples, moistening them both.

"Yessir," you exasperate, shamelessly; you rush to get his shirt off, drooling as the shower lights glistened on his toned chest. As you worked on his belt, your hands shake causing Jean to laugh, you groan in agitation as you couldn’t even open his belt.

. "Help her out, man, she's struggling." his hand worked faster as he slipped in another digit inside, curling them as he hit your g spot.

Heat fills your stomach as you sigh into Reiner's chest, he pats your head, telling you it okay. “Guess I’ll do it myself.”

You sigh as his hands slip in between you, the familiar jingle of his belt causing you to clench around Jean’s finger. You feel as his hands work on his belt as you took time to revel in pleasure. Jean moved his other hand from your hip to work your clit, using your slick as a lubricant. You sank deeper into his arms while Reiner worked his belt off along with his pants.

It fell to the ground, the metal on it clinking as it hit the floor. You grin sexily as Reiner stood in all his glory. "There. Now finish," he spoke curtly. Slipping your hand into his boxers, you pull them down. Jumping as his cock sprang out, hitting your face because you were sandwiched between the two. Reiner’s dick was long and thick, his tip swollen with anticipation and his tip pink with want. You trail your fingers down his veins that were prominent on all sides, smiling as he sighed sensually, dick throbbing in your hands. Your eyes cut to Marco, who stood watching, panting slightly as his hand with hand in his pants. Bertholdt stood watching; his breathing laboured as he watched with a red face, his dick hard as well."What about those two, " you mutter as you stare into their eyes.

"Don't worry about them, " Jean spoke harshly as he pulled his clothes off his skin. "We're busy for now."

"Look at you, so interested in someone else's needs." Reiner praised once more, peppering your lips with soft kisses. "They'll get a turn. Right now, we're playing."

Jean pulls your legs, spreading them out. His hand trailed down your back as he kissed your neck, leaving love bites when he can. Jean pressed on the small of your back, asking you to arch. He leaned you down, your face in front of Reiner’s dick, who cupped your chin again, his fingers brushing against your lip as you sat on your hands and knees.

"Say ah," as he patted your face, his voice tantalizing and husky with seduction, asking you to open your mouth, you almost instantly complying. He guided his dick to and past your lips, brushing his pre-cum on your plush, full and moistened lips. Licking them, you hum with delight. Wrapping your tongue around his tip, you pull Reiner by his thighs as close as you could without choking.

You shudder as Jean aligned himself at your entrance, his tip drawing circles on your clit as you buck your hips involuntarily. Your moaning sent vibration down Reiner's length.

You grew irritated as Jean teased your hole with the swole tip of himself, you push away from Reiner, enough so you could be. “Don’t leave me hanging, Jean.” You muttered back at the brunette who glared darkly. You shiver as sly laughter fell from his lips.

A scream shot in you as Jean plunged into, slamming into your sweet spot. You couldn’t help the way Jean pushed you into Reiner, causing you to gagged around him. Your nose scrunches up as more precum slides down your throat as he throbbed on your wet muscle.

Making quick use of your throat, Reiner hips began to rock in a slow, tight motion as he fucked your face slowly, one hand on the back of your head, knotted loosely in your hair. The other is under your armpit and wrapped around your shoulder, tugging you farther from Jean.

Warm drool pools in your mouth and down your chin. It dribbled down his waist, slicking his balls, the squelching of your throat and the feel of your tongue lapping him up as you hummed on his dick as Jean teased your womanhood drove him insane, as he pulled you you closer, watching your mouth swallow him up, again and again.

"F-fuck, so good." Reiner sputtered out praise, massaging the back of your head gently with one hand. It was a miracle you could breathe because the two of them weren't giving you a chance.

Marco's hand was in his pants, pumping away slowly, chasing a nut as he watched Reiner and Jean play tug of war with you and manhandled you. Listening to you cry out and moan was enough to cause him to erupt all over his hand. You groan at the empty feeling you feel as Jean pulls out. It didn’t last long though, as you squelch and pucker around him.

Suddenly you cried out as Jean pushed into your pulsating core, stuffing you even though he hadn't bottomed out. You're hogging Y/N, Reiner," Jean growled, his hands digging into your hips, pulling your ass apart. He watched part of his long and girthy shaft reappear and disappear from inside of you. "Let up, bro."

"Fuck no," Reiner breathed out, his eyes fluttering as he sighed, followed by more praise. Jean tugged you closer to him, against Reiner's needy and robust grip, pressing on your back, fixing your arch. To him, it wasn't deep enough; your ass needs to be higher. "Keep that arch, dammit."

You body lunges back and forth as they fuck into you simultaneously. You knees weaken as the realization sets in. To them, you were a rag doll, something they could use because you’d never stop them. You enjoyed it too much.

You cried out as Jean's large and heavy hand landed on your ass with a loud smack. His hands moved from your hips to your stomach; he slammed into the rest of the way and withdrew, leaving you feeling empty. Delicious pain shot through you as he pushed up back inside you.

The wetness of your mouth and your screams sending vibration down his dick, Reiner's hips to stall as he began to shake. To know that you even had this power over him caused you to clench around Jean.

Reiner moved his hands back to your head, tightening his grip in your now tangled hair. His dick hit the back of your throat as he forcefully pushed you closer to Jean, who thrust relentlessly, his head tossed make in pleasure. Reiner emptied himself down your throat, holding you in place as he forced you to take his load. "Swallow it all, beautiful." which you had no choice but to oblige; thankfully, he tasted pretty good. Sweeter than salty.

He moved a hand to your jaw, rubbing it softly as you breathed out heavily as he pulled out of your mouth with an audible pop. "Open up," he omitted quietly, tapping your chin. He wiped the wetness of tears from your eyes as you looked up at him through wet lashes, fighting moans as Jean also got sloppy with his thrusts.

Opening your mouth, Reiner looked inside and smiled constantly. "Good job, you did so well." though he was on his knees, he leaned down to kiss you right as your much-awaited orgasm shot through you as Jean's dick rubbed against you g spot, his thumb playing with your sensitive clit, the warm pit in your stomach boiling over as you spilled out onto Jean's pulsating length.

You pulled away from Reiner and cried out as Jean pulled you close to him, pinning your hands behind your back as he fucked you through your orgasm, laying you against the cold tiles that cut through your warmth. He laid on top of your shaking figure; he laid perfectly on your arch, putting all his weight on you to hold you down. Pulling out of you, Jean came on your ass, using a hand to smear it all over you. You noticed that Bertholdt finally turned around, a concerned look on his face as he held a rag, sitting in a chair.

Finally letting you go, Jean stood up smiling as he watched you lay on the ground. Walking around you, he stands at your hand. Watching your chest heave up and down made satisfaction shoot through him. "Told you that you'd like it." Jean laughed at your dazed expression, glazed over eyes and a tired and euphoric smile on your face.

Before Jean could get into aftercare, Bertholdt swooped you up as you cried out. You were sensitive, and they were pretty rough. "Aftercare is essential. Let's clean you up, baby." Bertholdt held you close, smiling softly as you looked at him through teary eyes.

He sat back in the chair, using the damp rag to wipe away the spit that covered your face, along with the nut on your ass, and also your folds, while he told you how perfect you had been, how sexy it was to watch his friends use you while your face was in his shirt. "Can you do me a favour?"

Looking up, you nodded your head, listening to whatever Bertholdt is about to say. You would speak, but you were still coming down from your high.

"Let me taste you." Passion burns in his eyes as Bertholdt licks his lips. You couldn't say no, not to that face. You hear the other boys laugh and tease the both of you.

You hide your face in his shirt as he wraps his around you, "you don't have to, but I'd like it." he muttered so only you could hear. He was giving you an out; if today had been too much, then Bertholdt hoped to do it someday along the line.

" I want to," you say hoarsely, your throat still ached from Reiner. "Let's lay by the shower," Bertholdt instructed as he covered your named body to one of the showerheads. He positioned you so that the water would hit your upper stomach. Turning it on to the lowest setting, water gently spurts out of the faucet, spraying a warm mist over your body that ached from being slutted out by Jean and Reiner. Who knew the pairing made for a devilish dicking down.

Bertholdt brought you back to his attention as he lifted your legs over his shoulders. He scooted close enough to smell your desire. He teased your clit with a light brush of his fingers. You cry out, the feeling of want to build deeply inside you.

"Such a tease," you muttered, bucking your hand against his skimming hand. Laughing lightly at you, Bertholdt teases your clit a few times before he sucked on it. Your thigh squeeze, involuntarily but Bertholdt opened your legs up. His tongue danced around your clit, rolling it between his lips as you began to moan out, your hands resting on his head, tingling as water lightly drizzles upon your arm. Bertholt put his arms around you, massaging your tummy in his hand while his tongue rubbed your clit. He sucked on every part of your pussy, that he could.

As he began to fuck you with his tongue, he dropped a hand down to run a tight circle with his thumb on your clit. Convulsing, you bucked your hips to match the flow of his tongue, working for your orgasm. Your breath began laboured as you met eyes with the other guys.

“Such a good girl, look at the way your grinding into Bert’s face,” Marco praised as you began to hump their friend’s face while he worshiped you with his tongue.

"You look adorable when you are about to cum," Reiner teased as he chuckled at your expression. You couldn't help but chew your lip with anticipation for your release.

"I can't believe you are this slutty," Jean laughed as he fucked you with his eyes.

You began to babble, at a loss for words due to their words and Bertholdt devouring you like he hadn’t ate earlier today in the mess hall

They loved to see you so vulnerable like this; it was a side not many seen since you were a seasoned soldier. But to see you mewling around through touch was enough to drive them nuts. They often all fantasized about you, they knew that they had a mutual crush on you, which they playfully argued about but it was nothing detrimental. And now, here they are, fucking you together, and jacking off to the way your face contorted and the way your body twisted, begging for more.

“Damn, if i knew, ah, that your mouth was this good, I would’ve hopped on a lot sooner.” You breathed out, hard carding through his soft brown hair.

“You taste so damn sweet,” Bertholdt muttered, his nose nudging your pulsating clit as he dipped his tongue into your core. He groaned at the way you tasted as he spread you open, licking a bold strip down your folds.

You watch the others as they pump away with their cocks in hand. Black dots cover your vision as you feel another orgasm shoot through to, Soaking Bertholdt's chin and lips as he lapped up your orgasm, his hands massaging away at your tummy.

Curses leave your lips as you rock your hip into his mouth that attempted to swallow your soul. "Ah~ Fuck!" you cried out, tears pricking in your eyes.

"It's okay, Y/N." Marco's voice echoes through you as you shook with pleasure. Reaching for him, Marco took his hand in yours, and he used the other one to brush your tears away. "You've been doing so good, now of your turn to be pleasured." he purred in your ear as he guided you through your second orgasm.

You latch onto his lips with yours, your tongue fighting to devour each other. Marco grinned at your breathy moans that he swallowed.

As your moans came to a stop, you couldn't help but lightly push Bertholdt away from your center. You were way too sensitive, and if he could have it his way then, you'd be there in that spot, all damn night.

He laughed as he laid eyes on you, you looked fucked beyond your comprehension, and your mind was still catching up. "You tasted amazing, thank you." Bertholdt pressed his lips to yours one last time to let you taste yourself.

Humming in his mouth, you hug him. You felt thankful and were in utter bliss. You've never been fucked so good before. This was your first 5-some, and you knew this was heavily frowned upon, but these four made you feel the best you have ever felt.

Reiner handed you your shorts and his undershirt so that you could get dressed. "So," he began, both of your faces glowing red and hot. "I think I speak for the guys when I say, this was fun. If you weren't satisfied, or this isn't your thing, we don't have to do it again, but we could." Reiner trailed off as the guys mutually agreed out loud. “Shit we would be more than welcome to doing this frequently.”

"It was enjoyable, a bit too enjoyable. It seems like now we are a party of 5, causing regular sex isn't going to cut it if I can be fucked with that," you laugh as you slip your clothes on. Pressing your lip to Reiner's lips and then each boy after that.

"Reiner and Jean," you call as you break away from your kiss with Bertholdt. "Next time, maybe don't fight with each other." you giggle as they awkwardly grin with knowing smiles.

"You liked it," Jean muttered as he pulled you into him, tucking you into his side as he kisses the top of your head.

"I did, now let's finish." you admitting, grabbing your things to finish cleaning before Levi makes an appearances. You ignored the shaking of your legs until you had finished. The five of you are finally at the dorms when you collapse into Marco, who carried you back.

Like you had said, it was like a guilty pleasure. You enjoyed being around beautiful men who wanted on you hand and foot. They were amazing and the sex was great too.

#attack on titan #jean kirschtein imagine #jean kirschtein x reader #marco bott #marco bodt #marco bodt x reader #reiner braun smut #shingeki no kyojin #imagines #smut #aot smut #attack on titan smut #bertholdt x reader #jean brainrot #reiner brainrot

[anime-corner]

I'm Here | Oikawa T.

A/N: Hey guys! I'm back (hopefully for longer since classes are about to end). Anyways, this one's a bit shorter than usual. I hope you like it!

"Yahoo! Knock, knock~ Sorry, practice finished later than usual!" Oikawa called out but was only greeted by darkness, "(n/n)-chan?"

The house was still, not a single noise was heard. Oikawa doubted that you would leave without texting him, it was practically tradition to crash at your place every after school. He looked around, stealing a loaf of bread before heading upstairs. Dim lights could be seen from under the closed door as Oikawa turned the knob, inviting himself in as usual.

"Hey, Iwa-chan told me that-- what are you doing typing, er writing, whatever it is you're doing in the dark?!" He bellowed, flicking the light switch on. A hiss escaped your lips as you momentarily closed your eyes to adjust to the lighting.

"Shut up, Tooru. I'm kind of busy at the moment so if you don't mind, I'd like to finish all of this tonight." His eyes glanced over at the stack of papers on your left as your right hand hovered on top of another, gripping on a pencil tightly. Your left hand was typing away as fast as it could.

"What's all these? Haven't you finished the assignment yesterday?"

"Well, yes but, this one's for the student council. I need to file a report and it needs to be passed at midnight." You then gestured towards the paper, a bit crumpled with the many times you wrote the wrong formula, "And this is for Monday's class presentation."

"And these?" He pointed towards the stack of papers.

"That's…" You blinked a couple of times before responding, "I think it's the ones from the council three days ago that I haven't checked yet. Anyways, I'll handle that after I'm done with this."

"How many hours of sleep did you even get?" He asked.

"What? I don't think my sleep schedule has anything to do with this, Tooru." You answered, not taking your eyes off of your work.

"Just tell me." Oikawa insisted, sitting on your bed as he stared at you.

"Fine. Around two or so? I'll give it a three since I've been running on coffee since I woke up." His brows furrowed, worry etched on his face if only you took the time to look at him.

"That's not good, (n/n)-chan. Come on, I'll finish that." You shook your head, still not lifting your gaze away.

"No way, you had practice just minutes ago! I'm perfectly capable of finishing these within the day if you just so let me. Now shush-- hey!"

"I mean it, (y/n)." You huffed as you glared at him, "You need your sleep. I'll wake you up before dinner."

"What? No! I can't, Tooru!" You protested, standing up from your seat as you felt a slight pain from your head. You shook it off as nothing, "Tachibana-sensei's breathing down my neck saying she'd be the reason why I wouldn't be graduating this year."

"You still have a day to go before classes start again on Monday. You don't need to rush everything today--"

"Haven't you been listening? The report is due tonight. These," You gestured towards the stack of papers, "Might as well be due at the same time. And after this one, I've also got to revise my notes. I'm falling behind, Tooru and I don't want to hear anything from my mother once I move back."

"You won't (y/n), trust me. You're the smartest girl I know in school and probably the busiest one. I'm sure she'd be proud of you--"

"You see, that's not enough. I need to get my grades up, a bit higher than now." You countered. You retorted, huffing in annoyance at how the setter wouldn’t leave you all alone.

"You don't need to. What you need is to calm down a bit. You know that--"

"Will you stop it, Tooru!? You just don't get it, do you?! My parents thought that I would get into Shiratorizawa and what did I do? Fail the exam!" You bellowed, standing up from your seat as the male stepped back a bit. You stood up, voice raised as Oikawa stepped back, "My mom wanted me to at least be at the top during my first and second year, to at least in her words, redeem myself. But I failed on that too. Now, you're telling me to calm down? To take a break? Well, I can't. I've got my family's voices screaming at me saying I should do better! Do you know how--"

"You're crying, (y/n)..." Oikawa whispered as he placed a hand on your cheek, his thumb wiping away the tears. You lightly pushed him back, rubbing your way with your sleeves. He pointed out. A hand lay on your cheek as his thumb wiped away a tear, you pushed him away after, wiping it away with your hands.

"S-shut up. I'm not crying. Just… leave me alone for today, Tooru. I'm really busy and I can't afford to let all of my hard work turn to dust."

"I'll help you."

"For the last time, I--" He cut you off.

"Just let me help!" He was already frustrated seeing the girl he adored so much struggling with her life.

He knew of her problem with her parents and most importantly, he knew the conflict she had with herself. He knew that feeling more than ever. And he didn't want her to feel the same way he did during that time.

And he was afraid that, while it might not cost her a knee, she might lose so much more if she continues. Perhaps, her eyesight or her health. Worst case, her life. And he wasn't going to let her get to that point.

"If Iwa-chan was here, he'd know what to do… but he isn't. And I don't want to disturb him too. I'm just trying my best to help you, because I understand, I understand you the most out of everyone," He walked closer, enveloping you in a hug as the two of you sat on the floor, "You just want to prove something but, you're all fed up about everything. You're trying your best but I guess, to others, that's not good enough."

Tears slowly dripped down from your face once again as you buried your head on his chest, gripping on his jacket, "Why can't you leave me alone, Tooru? I don't care if you get me… I just want to be left alone."

"I'm staying, (y/n) and that's final. I'm not going to let you carry that burden all by yourself anymore. I'm here, remember? I'll help you," Oikawa whispered in your ear as he caressed your back, "You're, besides Iwaizumi, the one I treasure the most. I care about you and I don't want you to suffer like this when I know that I could have tried and saved you from it."

"Why?" That one question made him silent for a while as you looked up at him.

"I… it's because…" He sighed, making you somewhat dread and anticipate the answer at the same time, "I love you, you know that? And while this might possibly be-- ah, who am I kidding? It's the worst time possible to tell you this, I don't think that I'll be able to get another chance like this."

"T-Tooru… I…" You started but went silent as he brought his hand up.

"Please hear me out?" He inhaled before opening his mouth again to speak, "I… I want to support you (y/n), the same way you and Iwaizumi did all these years, especially during the time when I overworked my knee. The two of you were always there. So, let me be there for you too."

"It's just not easy when you've been doing everything yourself for most of your life…" You gulped, avoiding his gaze as you clenched your fists tightly.

"I know. But, I really do love you. And I promise that you'll never regret choosing me unlike how I regret eyeing up girls when I knew that you were right in front of me the whole time and they'll never be you. They'll never be as hardworking, caring and overly kind as you. You're perfect and so much more. Because everything means nothing to me if I can have you to call as mine." Oikawa said, moving a strand of your hair away from your face.

"Even the nationals?" You asked, teasing him a bit.

"I… okay, maybe not the nationals. I still want to beat Ushiwaka and all. But that's besides the point," He shook his head, placing his chin on top of your head, "You're amazing and beautiful, even when you think you're not. And I'm really sorry for confessing at the worst time possible. But, believe me when I say that I love you."

"Why are you… confessing now?" Somehow, this question made him think. It's not like he hadn't practiced his answer in the mirror for a million times, making sure it was perfect to his ears. Not at all. But, given the situation, he'd have to abandon that script and start a new one.

"Well, it just pains me to see you doing the same things I did before, even though your academics and my career as a player are two different things, and I thought that if I manage to successfully tell you how I feel, I could somehow help you carry all of this. Because by that time, I would hopefully be your boyfriend." Oikawa spoke genuinely, moving one of his hands from her back to her head, stroking her hair.

"You don't need to be my boyfriend to help me, you know."

"I know that but you just make it so difficult, argh! Everytime I see you frustrated, I just wanna hug you and kiss you and then take over your work while you rest. But I can't do that as a friend! So… so..." Not that he thought about it, what he said sounded stupid, "Yeah, I know. It's a dumb excuse."

"You're an idiot." The third year laughed out loud.

"I know, Iwa tells me that all the time." You lightly hit his shoulder, hiding the smile that was threatening to show, "At least I made you smile right?"

"I guess you did, Tooru. I guess you did." He hummed in satisfaction before something else you couldn't quite figure out what was etched on his face.

"I'm not going to force you to answer my feelings right away, (y/n)-chan. I can wait." He stammered.

"Why wait when I feel the same way? I love you too, Tooru." He perked up suddenly, making you hide the massive blush on your face.

"Wait, really? You're not joking right? (y/n)?" The setter found you fast asleep, whether or not you were faking it, he wouldn't know. He only chuckled, kissing your head, "Alright… I'll let you get some rest. You deserve it."

He carried you over to your bed, tucking you in. His hand lingered on your cheek, a smile on his face as he whispered.

"Dream of me will you, (y/n)-chan?" Oikawa stood up straight, eyes darting towards your mess of a desk, "Now… which one did she say she needed by midnight?"

Let me hold your hand and carry the same burden you hold. I'll always be here, even if you push me away.

#haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyu x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #hq!! x reader #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x you #haikyuu!! x y/n #haikyuu!! x you #haikyuu!! #haikyuu fanfics #haikyuu imagines #oikawa x reader #oikawa x you #oikawa x y/n #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu hcs #oikawa fluff #haikyuu angst #oikawa angst #haikyuu fanfic #hq angst #haikyuu #haikyu #hq!! #haikyu!!

[itoshit]

'The journey lasted 4 hours so it's now...8pm. Ran is waiting for you at 9pm, don't forget that.'

Both in Sanzu's office we were discussing the past events.

'Yeah yeah I know. Vee stays here. She can sleep at your place with her friend I don't mind that. I won't be back before at least 1am. I might have other things to do so I'll go to my office right after the meetings. I'm gonna pass by my penthouse real quick, I need to take a shower and recharge my gun, get ready and take my car'

'I guess I'm the one who needs to bring you back there?'

Nodding I stood up quickly followed by Sanzu.

Meeting Vee and her friend in the living room, both sat on the sofa, I cocked an eyebrow at the sight.

'You're gonna get drunk?'

'Yeah, except if you take that off our lives too hm?'

Not answering to Natalie I put my shoes on. My injuries were still fresh and stung my body but I wouldn't ask Sanzu to help me put my fucking jacket, I still had my pride.

'Are we leaving?'

Not throwing a glance at Vee I shook my head negatively.

'You're not but I am. I won't come back before tomorrow so stay here and have fun with your friend I guess. Sanzu is bringing me back to my place so don't do anything stupid while he's away'

'All good?'

'Yeah'

Now in his car, I could feel Sanzu particularly tensed.

'What's up?'

'This girl... Senju. How did she look like?'

'Eh?... white pastel hair, baby blue eyes... why?'

His knuckles were literally white, meaning that he was mad.

'So she's Takeomi's sister ?'

'Yeah'

'Alright'

'She wanted my dick'

Hitting the brake abruptly caused my body to jolt forward.

'The fuck Sanzu?? I'm bloody injured!!'

'She wanted to fuck you??'

Trying to stay calm at his antics I took a deep breath before answering.

'Who the fuck do you think you are? I'm your boss. Keep driving.'

Silence settling between us, I had my fingers on my lips.

'I don't know if she was serious but she tried to get into my pants.'

'And what's going on between Vee and you?'

'Honestly? I don't know. We did some stuff in Osaka, and I don't want her to see someone else. I'm not thinking of fucking another girl but we're not even having sex'

'You should get drunk together. Nat and I get wasted together and fuck the sex is amazing!'

Snorting at his reply I didn't answer, too preoccupied by your face in my mind.

'I would have advised you to come back tonight to have her but with your current physical condition you need rest. Your body heals quickly though'

Finally arriving at my place, I briefly thanked Sanzu before entering the building.

Home sweet home right?

My gun was in its strap, another one was safety stuck on my hip in its holster. Seeing Ran from afar I simply fastened my pace.

Whistling at my form he raised his eyebrows. Seemed like people won't stop commenting on my injuries.

Ready to speak I cut him by raising my hand.

'Just don't. I'm here for one reason, I still need to do many things'

'As you wish Mikey. So! Natalie's father is indeed dead. We found pieces of his body around Tokyo's Bay. Must be dead for months.'

A glass of whisky in my hand I sighted. This was getting more and more complicated.

'So Natalie offered her body for nothing ?'

'Hm.'

'We won't tell her when her father died. She's probably unaware of body decomposition so even if she wants to see him, we could explain his state with the water.'

'You're softening. Few weeks ago you wouldn't have cared and would have thrown the new to her face with even a cute picture of her daddy'

Waving his comment away I took a gulp of my drink.

'The Yamaguchi-gumi is our target. La Costra Nostra will probably join us soon. It's December, I want to have their leaders heads before February. Have you found their hideout?'

'Not yet. Give us a week'

Nodding, I finished my glass and stood up, patting Ran's shoulder.

'Good job Ran, you never fail to amaze me. Maybe you'll get a salary increase yeah?'

Hearing him laughing loudly at my comment made me grin too.

'Perfect then, goodnight Mikey'

-Mikey

I want to write so much more but I can't write a whole fic everytime 😠

Also I hope we'll be able to still find our time when you'll be back home 🥺

i’m sure we will mod darling don’t worry!

Four wine glasses to Natalie’s five, I was well on my way to getting plastered. Our spontaneous runway session became different things the tipsier we got. First, we mixed and matched outfits, pretended a certain outfit had a specific occasion assigned to it, and then did a full serious haul of all my clothes, majority of which Nat gave impressed nods to. Now, we had a twist— truth or dare while I modeled the clothes off. Wearing a cute black bodycon dress Mikey had bought me, I had gotten away with picking truth the last seven rounds; Natalie called me out for it by the eighth.

Another truth? she groans aloud. Anymore and you’ll be a fucking saint!

Sober, I would never have given into the obvious peer-pressure, but I’m far from sobriety. I cross my arms, challenging. Fine, dare.

Natalie grins. I dare you to go downstairs and ask the first hot guy you see for your number.

Immediately I regret not picking truth. Can we even go downstairs without Sanzu?

I went down to the pool without him this entire week. Stop deflecting, unless you’re chickening out. You know what you’ll have to do if you wuss out.

I did. When we were teenagers, where the worst possible thing to be called by your peers was a slut, we’d created a rule in truth or dare that if you didn’t complete your dare, you’d have to send nude pictures to your entire contact list.

It was such a scary thought when we were younger, that we did every single dare we were given, regardless if the dare was worse. Now that I’m older, the wuss out option didn’t seem so bad. Especially now that I had a new phone with only three contacts. Mikey would definitely appreciate any picture I sent— he saw the real thing anyway— and Natalie and I had seen each other naked all throughout our life. The only thing that stopped me from truly taking that route was Sanzu. Sending a nude pic to Mikey’s right hand and the man Nat was fucking didn’t sit right with me.

I begrudgingly stand and Nat cheers, already knowing what I would’ve chosen. We exit the apartment and wait an hour in the lobby for someone to come in. The entire time I thought of Mikey, wishing he still had a phone so I could’ve called him and gotten out of this night from my second glass of wine. I curse the Italians in my head.

When a man fitting the criteria of the dare’s stipulations walks in, I immediately rush him, honest about the situation and how I’m quite literally in his face only because I’ve been dared to do it. I even tell him how he doesn’t have to give me his real number and that a fake one would suffice, he insists it’s alright, scribbling down some digits and a name in pretty scrawl. I thank him, but not without looking him up and down. He has a cute, but forgettable face.

And judging by the amount of wine in my system, he’d be forgotten soon enough.

We head back to Sanzu’s apartment with Natalie screeching the entire way there about how cute he was, how I needed to give her the number if I didn’t plan on using it, and it all made my head hurt. I perform miracles drunk, seeing as I undressed, got dressed in pajamas and snuggled up into Natalie’s unused bed (she spent all her time in Sanzu’s) and instantly knock out with the crumpled paper with the guy’s number watching me sleep from the bedside table.

#🗝; citizen #🗝; mikey #🗝; chronicles of vee: vol. 1 #i had to come up with something QUICK #😮‍💨 #AND LMFAO I LOVE UR FICS PLS