#wendy protection squad

[rose-tea-and-strawberries]

Hey, I sent in this ask and Tumblr ate it, so here it is:

You know how Yuu getting turned into a child because of a potion accident or a spell mishap is a pretty popular trend in twst headcanons and imagines. I'm thinking about the same scenario with Yuu while she's on her shift in the club. It either happened because of one of Von Drake's inventions accidentally zapping Yuu or someone was messing with Fairy Godmother's wand again.

I mean the chaos and panic that would ensue in the club when Yuu gets hit by a spell gone wrong, and she straight up disintegrates except for her clothes. Everyone's like "OH NO, WE KILLED OUR KID!" And Donald's reaction is like this. But then the clothes start shuffling, and they all find a cute baby Yuu.

If you thought they clubgoers were bad before when it came to competing for the custody over Yuu, it's worse now. Hell, even Mickey is twitching to grab his sorcerer hat and keyblade. Any disney character who's a parent are fighting over on who gets to hold Yuu next. Pepa Madrigal is summoning a biblical storm outside because Triton was taking too long holding Yuu, and it's supposed to be her turn. The parent characters all miss holding a baby.

"Your five minutes are up! Let me hold her!"

The couples are all high on baby fever when they get to hold Yuu. I can see Ariel really missing when Melody was a baby and turning to Eric to say that they should have another kid.

The villains to Yuu: Come to the dark side we have cookies.

I can see just cuddling with the Winnie-the-Pooh characters since they're technically anthropomorphic stuffed animals and soft enough to sleep on.

Even characters who I don't see as parent types take to Yuu so well. Gaston finally gets a turn, and he gets quiet. For the next five minutes, his hubris goes away, and he's so gentle with Yuu. Belle and Adam are in awe because that's what got him to shut up? I mean they get it. Yuu is adorable but still.

Lol. I think went too far with this ask.

"Oh no, we killed our kid!" *Side eyes the villains* it's not like any of you have ever attempted child murder before

That Donald link is everything and it is now canon that that is exactly his reaction when Yuu, his nephews and Max are in danger (I've never watched Ducktales so I don't know if there are any other kids Donald hangs out with)

I absolutely love de-aging fics. It's been one of my favourite tropes in practically every fandom I've been in. I actually did have this one story line I was brainstorming in my head during this very long car ride where some magic caused Yuu, Ace, Deuce, Leona, Azul and Epel to de-age to around 6-7-8 and the NRC students had to deal with that (it kind of played along the lines how the day before the magic accident Yuu said that if she met the NRC gang when she was younger, her younger self definitely would've wanted to be friends with them - there was even this scene where smol Yuu 'meets' baby octopus Azul and he gets all teary-eyed that this pretty 'stranger' thinks that he's nice - and there was another one with little Yuu and cub Leona where they take a nap together) but I digress.

So I'm not going to go for baby since there's not much a baby can do so I'm going to say she's reverted back to a 5/6 year old.

Lilo, Alice and Wendy insist that she spends most of her time with them. They see Yuu as a big sister and now that she's younger, they are much more protective of her. Christopher Robin is included in that group not because he's part of the Yuu Protection Squad but because he's close friends with Alice and Wendy so he's dragged along for the ride. Lilo doesn't want Yuu to hang around with the villains or the NRC boys - she's made badness charts of both Yuu and the villains to show her friend how dangerous they are. Lilo and Yuu definitely get Horace to play Elvis songs because Elvis is amazing.

It doesn't matter how old Yuu is, if she sees our favourite tubby little cubby all stuffed with fluff she is hugging that silly old bear for as long as she can (lucky, lucky her). The tv show called 'My Friends Tigger and Pooh' and one special episode of 'Doc McStuffins' show that the Hundred Acre Woods gang love hanging around children even if they aren't Christopher Robin - let's just hope, Tigger doesn't get too boisterous with his bouncing. Speaking of which, Roo is very happy to have another kid to hang out with (he excitedly asks his mother if they can bring Lumpy with them the next day) and Kanga finds herself doting on Yuu even more with the other animal mothers (etc: Perdita, Mrs Jumbo, Bambi's mother, Duchess etc)

Since Simba (canonically in the first movie) and Ariel (in the non-canon sequel) are the only prince and princess to have children, I think that they would argue that they are the best suited to looking after Yuu - only for Baloo to pipe in that he and Bagheera have plenty of experience in caring for mancubs (the fact that Mowgli was raised by wolves who are still very much alive seems to be completely forgotten by the bear)

Tiana has to literally restrain Naveen and Charlotte from either kidnapping Yuu on the spot to go gallivanting to every toy and dress shop they know or just going to said shops anyway and buying everything they see.

Aladdin and Robin Hood are really good with kids in their movie (and Aladdin's TV series) so they would be having a blast regaling Yuu with tales of their adventures.

Wait, wait Jack Skellington and Sally canonically have kids in the epilogue of their movie so they would have some experience to boast about (in the movie's soudtrack with Sir Patrick Stewart at least)

Unfortunately, none of the heroes trust the villains to go within five feet of child!Yuu for completely logical and justifiable reasons so Yuu the villainous sidekicks usually end up sneaking around nearby

(At some point, Yuu ends up giving Ed the hyena a hug, headpats and a forehead kiss and he never lets anyone forget that)

All the Disney parents are living their best life with Yuu around. I think King Stefan and Queen Leah are especially happy because they never got to see their daughter, Aurora, at that age and they kind of feel like they get a chance at seeing what could have been.

Someone should also probably keep an eye on Fauna incase she pulls a Lilia and straight up kidnaps Yuu

#house of mouse au #twst #twst yuu #fem yuu #twisted wonderland #asks

[sapphire-drawings]

Wendy protection Squad assembled!!!

This picture was supposed to be much more simpler. . . Oh well, the Carter's deserve it

So cuuuute!! They have the same stance, didn't even realized

Little Close Up 👇👇👇

#dont starve #dont starve together #ds maxwell #ds wendy #fan art #digital art #digital artist

[ouatnextgen]

Last ask for the day:

Since we already decided Rowena is a giver, what kind of gifts do you think her friends (and ex) gave her?

Obviously, Killian gave her a hella cool sword. But what about the others?

Tempest: She paints and sketches her things, but Rowena's favorite one is the sketch of the whole squad together, and the one of Killian that she did.

Warren: You know how in the 2003 live action Peter Pan, Pan gives Wendy a "kiss" and it's like an acorn that Wendy puts on a necklace? Warren gives her something similar as kids.

Silver: I wanna go the angst route and say that he gave her a silver knife or something, just in case the rumors about hybrids turn out to be true and she has to "do what she's gotta do" to protect their friends

Other than that, she taught him how to tie knots, and he gave her the first knot he ever tied as a present :)

Kiran: Besides constantly patching her up, I think he'd give her a golden medallion with his kingdom's sigil on it, so she can blend in a little easier while on the run

Pen: Gives her flowers constantly (jokes about making Tempest and eventually Warren jelous are made) and also maybe embroiders some pillows with curse words for her.

Aris: Trust issues <3 Oh, and a stab wound scar

Taran: His service as a knight for her kingdom

Gerhardt: I don't remember too much of his personality, I'll be honest, but maybe after she gives him the necklace to clear his head, he starts giving her little trinkets he finds? Like cool rocks and little flowers.

#once upon a time oc #once upon a time au #rwylm story

[ao3feed-assassin-class]

#AO3 Link #FanFiction #AO3 Karmagisa #♥ #Karmagisa #Aizawa Shouta #⚣ #R:T #W:U #A:Wendy Noire #BNHA AU #Fluff #Angst #November 2023

[waremyth]

Reunion

I was currently getting ready for a reunion at Francios Dupont, my fiancé is currently trying to get our children dressed, oh right you don't know yet, let me explain

-------------------------------------------------------

I had defeated hawkmoth with dragon, viper, princess honey, chat noir, and lastly bunix, after the defeat we revealed our identities to each other, jagged had adopted us after finding out that my parents had abused me and that Adrien's father was hawkmoth and had isolated Adrien from the outside world other than school, Lukas mother had kicked him out because Julica told her that he was helping a bully and is being one so jagged took full custody of him, when he had adopted Adrien and I we were.... let's say complicated, I didn't like being locked in a room for too long, and hands or voices being raised at me because of the bullying and the abuse, while Adrien didn't like being stuck in a room locked or a house alone, they didn't know till it happened(ill make small one-shots for how they figured it out later) they tried to not do those things just in case, once fagged found out about the bullying and they found out about a couple of scars from the class, jagged moved us to Gotham and we transferred to Gotham high, Adrien and luka had made the sister protection squad aka SPS, after about two weeks of school I had made friends with Damien Wayne the ice prince of Gotham and John Kent, we were unsure about them until a month after, about five months after Damien asked me out on a date and to be his girlfriend and i said yes, then about two weeks later Adrien and John got together and yes they know what had happened to us in Paris, and we know each other's identities, after being together for a year Damien and I had our children twins named Amira and Lilian, about four months after Damien proposed to me, Adrien and Jon where already married and had adopted a meta human child, his name is Dax, Luka and Kagami are also married, Chloe is engaged to Tim, Alix met a girl with white hair down to her shoulders, blue left eye, hazel left eye, loves black clothes, her name is Wendy, Shes very nice, they are currently girlfriends soon more, I still have a problem with hands raised at me but I try my best to block it out when I'm ladybird, now let's continue shall we?

-------------------------------------------------------

I was currently wondering if I should change out of the dress I'm currently wearing a red that fades to black dress that goes down to my feet, with off the shoulder sleeves, you can see some parts of my scars, I heard my door click open so I turned around to see Damien there, "angel you look gorgeous" "really I don't look ugly in this dress" Damien walks over to me and kisses me "Angel you're not ugly, your beautiful" "but my scars..." "show that you went through something bad and out came it" he said then kissed my dimples "also I had found out that Adrien, Jon, Chloe and Tim will be coming, Alix said that they won't be with us today" "will she be-" proposing, yes she is" I smile "They're going to finally make it official" Damien just chuckled and we had set off to my old school with Amira and Lilian, about ten minutes later we reached toe school, and I was nervous, my whole French class will be hear, the worst bullies I have ever had with Lila at the top, I had squeezed Damien's hand for comfort and he squeezed it back just as tight to reassure me, we had started walking in after and saw Adrien, Jon, Chloe, and Tim in the corner, we had decided to go join them after about twenty-thirty minutes I had went to go find myself a drink, when two people I knew all too well came to me "Oh Marinette, why are you hear you aren't apart of this class anymore*Gasps*are you hear to bully me again I'm so sorry if I did something to you" "Mari-slut how could you come here just to bully sweet Lila, you're a monster" about to smack her but someone grabbed her arm, I look over and see Damien glaring at her "TT, what do you think you're doing you my wife you harlots" I then see the twins run up to me saying "Mama" "mom!" I hug the two and look up to see Damien looking at them along with Tim, Jon, and Chloe, Adrien came to me to calm me down and check for any injuries on me, "TT, Tim starts the plan, were going to leave afterward" Tim had nodded and went up to the podium, I was confused, there was a plan? " Everyone can I have your attention please!" everyone stopped talking and look at him "please turn you direction to the screen please" everyone looked at the screen and a video started playing.

Everyone was shocked and horrified to learn this, police officers had come in and is currently escorting Lila to the car, while Damien and her friend and family left the scene.

#mlb x dc #daminette #My Idea

[k-laconia-bug1]

A different type au of Fairy tail crossover with Witcher but Jaskier and Lucy are still twins

@thesebrkenbones

When Jaskier and Lucy are 9 Queen Calanthe heard news of Jude Heartfilia neglect on the twins decided to raise them Herself alongside her daughter Pavetta, allowing Jaskier and Lucy Magic to flourish and grow stronger while also not being separated

Calanthe and Layla were best friends growing up growing distance after their respective marriages and are eachother godmother to they're children

Lucy and Jaskier joined the Guild when they were 15 per there mothers wishes and when they were 19 is when tenrou Island happened Jaskier (in pretty much all my au's) is left behind and he wanders the path accepting the odd job here and there when he hears news of what happened he is distraught running back to Cintra to Tell Calanthe when Jaskier turns 21 (2 years into the 7 year timeskip) he meets Geralt

When growing up Jaskier and Lucy decided to learn a secondary magic Re-quip and are nearly as skilled as Erza most to Aquarius assistants along with Calanthe that they don't just use a whip as a weapon

Along with meeting Geralt. Jaskier keeps his magic hidden for 2 years (when Jaskier turns 23 4 years into the time skip) its exposed during Djinn episode right before it can slit Jaskiers throat Jaskier has it knocked out cold with a burst of magic after enchanting Geralt into a deep sleep for 8 hours (suck it Geralt get a full night's rest) with the aid of a wool bomb

Jaskier drags Geralt to Fairytail to explain that he has Ethernanos Magic

Geralt with a tad upset with his Bard for not telling him he understood and invited Jaskier to kaer morhen during the last 3 years of the time skip Geralt and Jaskier have grown much Closer

Geralt helps Jaskier with the grief of losing his twin sister and Wendy

Geralt and Jaskier meet Yennifer on a mission request it was near where they were at the time and it was yennifer simply putting up a request to have a discussion between magics simply wishing to know the differences

Yennifer and Jaskier grow close with a sibling sort of rivalry, and Jaskier Gently tells Yen that Mind Magik is strictly Forbidden as the magic council no matter if it's choas or Ethernanos Magik

Yennifer and Geralt never get together they just have a drink or two whenever to talk about Jask

Aka protection squad

When Lucy meets Geralt for the first time she just knows Gerskier are in love and Lucy approves of the tall witcher

Lucy and Yennifer meet and also grow a sibling bond

Jaskier eases Calanthe rage when the law of surpise happen

Calanthe "Jules you better stay with that witcher make sure my grand baby will be safe"

Geralt when drunk is a Jaskier simp and becomes a big teddy bear just wanting Jask cuddles

#witcher geralt #geralt z rivii #geralt x jaskier #geralt of rivia #poor jaskier #bamf jaskier #jaskier witcher #jaskier #julian alfred pankratz #Jaskier Heartfilia #lucy heartifilla #lucy heartfilia #witchers #the witcher #fairytail #fairy tail #gerlion #geralt loves jaskier #jaskier loves geralt

[ao3feed-nalu]

Redder than Blood, Hotter than Regret (NaLu Version)

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/3GezIwk

by RayRach

Natsu will forever be haunted by the look in Lucy's eyes moments before his magic would have killed her. He'll always have the scent of her blood and the sounds of her screams ringing in his ears. Forgiveness is the last thing he deserves, but Lucy disagrees.

Based on the Dragon Cry movie: What if Natsu and co hadn't found Lucy before Zash tortured her? TW: torture, mentions of SA.

Keep your eyes peeled for this story as a GrayLu one-shot, as well. :)

Words: 3834, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Series: Part 1 of Fairy Tail One-Shots

Fandoms: Fairy Tail

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con

Categories: F/M

Characters: Natsu Dragneel, Lucy Heartfilia, Erza Scarlet, Gray Fullbuster, Wendy Marvell, Gajeel Redfox

Relationships: Natsu Dragneel/Lucy Heartfilia

Additional Tags: Mentions of SA, mentions of torture, minorly graphic description of torture, Blood, Love Confessions, spoilers for Dragon Cry, Dragon Cry, Fairy Tail: Dragon Cry, sorry that my stories make lucy suffer, i just know how FERAL fairy tail gets, fairy tail is the lucy protection squad, touch her and die vibes

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/3GezIwk

#ao3feed #fanfic #Nalu #Natsu x Lucy #Fairy Tail

[goldenworldsabound]

I hope you don't mind the ask! But how many aus do you have? :3

I love getting asks and I love hearing from you!!!

this is a big question fjdsahfkjds like EVER I mean- I- I don't know-

Crossover-wise I have the royalty au (two versions lowkey), and a vague concept of an au where all of my FOs live in one town and I move into it! I also have the Wendy Protection Squad which was a Philly-Shizuo fic :D there was also a concept I started working on for a fantasy rpg type AU! back when I had a lot fewer faves fkjdhsakjf

Most of my faves that aren't from modern times have modern AUs! Like Viren, Auron, Philly...for some notably examples. And some faves have multiple SIs that are in the canonverse so it's hard for me to say which is an au but there's more than one so there's an au in there somewhere...

Rufus specifically has a bunch fdkshfskjda he has the little meow meow au, arranged marriage from childhood au, a modern au I haven't spent too much time on, a modern au crossover with Auron I also haven't spent too much time on, and literal isekai for me into ff7! And he'll have a secondary au for whatever remake does with him and the plot assuming it's different enough. And the AU where we're in a poly with Reno and I just ignore the plot.

...that's more than I expected fkjdashfkjdsa

ummmm geez Viren also has a very fleshed out modern au, and an au I don't talk about much where I sort of end up taking over his role and becoming the one who gets super corrupted. Which is neat! And a secondary SI who is more on his level and like...able to argue toe to toe with him.

Akabayashi actually has quite a few he has two SIs to begin with, beauty and the beast AU, and dragon who rescues princesses AU!

Ah...other notable ones...well, those are mostly the ones that come to mind! Usually it's the modern AU or a more off the wall SI, hehe.

Thank you for asking!! this was fun to answer!!!

#maybe one day I'll write all the Rufus ones lmao

[thiesen94shannon]

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#squishmallows #mart #squishy #best #top #new

[ladysunamireads]

#AO3 Link #FanFiction #AO3 Karmagisa #♥ #Karmagisa #Aizawa Shouta #AssassinClass #⚣ #😈🐍 #R:T #BNHA AU #Angst #Fluff #A:Wendy Noire

[ostensiblynone]

Larry Quirk, [Mike] Connolly's fellow Hollywood journalist, heard a number of reports of Connolly's "amorous activities." If gossip about Connolly at gay parties was as rampant as Quirk remembered, it could easily have reached the ears of a tipster for Confidential.

"Eddie Goulding [the director] told me one young actor did something cruel to Mike," Quirk said. "The actor wanted Mike to do something at a studio for him, while Mike wanted to have sex with the actor. He was angry when Mike didn't keep his promise to help him. So to get even he put sneezing powder on his penis in advance and then let Mike go down on him. Mike ended up sneezing and coughing for a week." "There used to be a place on Wilshire," Quirk continued. "It wasn't a bathhouse because there weren't baths, but a gym with lots of commodious private 'dressing cubicles.' I know Mike went there because I saw him there, leaving someone's cubicle. Another time I was with a young man who told me he had been picked up by Mike on Hollywood Boulevard," said Quirk. "Mike had a masochistic side; he liked danger. His favorite line was, 'Are you an actor? If not, you should be.' Eddie Goulding also told me Mike had a habit of picking up rough trade, and some of the boys would try to blackmail him. Eddie said Mike almost got himself killed once by a scruffy lad who pulled a knife on him. Another guy robbed him. I think he may have been arrested once, but pulled strings to get off or have the record expunged." If there is no surviving record of Connolly's having been arrested by the vice squad, it is clear from his column that he held a grudge against the Los Angeles police. He often took potshots at them, such as "L.A. vice squad's new theme song: Hello, Young Lovers, Wherever You Are," or "Vice squad has put on fourteen extra men and given them a list of all bars on the side streets between Santa Monica and Sunset." Connolly's friend David Hanna said the vice squad (known simply as "vice") was a constant danger to gay men. "The vice squad was there and had to be kept busy," Hanna recollected. "It was aggressive in its pursuit of gay people in any way it could get them because they were so easy to get." Connolly frequently passed along police stories to readers, such as the night "the sheriff chased a covey of customers out of the Interlude" or "Beverly Hills cops are vice-campaigning with a vengeance" or "Vice squadders have drilled tiny peepholes into most of the town's most notorious saloons." These items were all related in neutral language, but in each case it was gay establishments and patrons that were being targeted and raided. … A number of lawyers in Los Angeles, including Wendy Stewart and Harry Weiss, handled gay cases. Greg Bautzer, the top facilitator of deals in the entertainment industry, was counsel to the Hollywood Reporter and would have had the connections to protect Connolly's good name had the need arisen. Connolly dropped Bautzer's name in the column several times per week in an attitude bordering on worship, even though Bautzer was not an entertainer in need of publicity. Other individuals who were not lawyers were also known as someone to see in times of extraordinary need. Singled out in Connolly's column was Kemp Niver, who won a special Oscar in 1954 for inventing a process that converted old paper film into projectable film. Niver had also been a private investigator in Los Angeles, one of the few, according to Connolly, who "has never been corrupted by these scandal magazines" and who "has also acted, for many years, as a 'laundryman' here, helping to keep certain reputations clean. It has cost him plenty of work but he has never learned how to say no to anyone in trouble.'"

—Mike Connolly and the manly art of Hollywood gossip by Val Holley, published 2003

#mike connolly #kemp niver #1950s

[eagletek]

Corinne Diacre sacked as France Women coach after players quit squad | France women's football team

Corine Diacre has been sacked as head coach of the France women’s national team because of what the French Football Federation described as “a very significant divide” with the players that has “reached the point of no return”. Diacre’s tenure has been fraught and the tipping point came when the captain Wendie Renard announced she would not play for the team to protect her mental health, saying…

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[live-laugh-loverpool]

The Fox With the Long Face

Tags: @reborn-from-your-ashes, @hello-paralyzed-world, @millythegoat

Sequel to:

The Fox and Her Gamma Ray

Chocolate-Covered Pretzels

Bleu vs. Oranje

Warnings: angst, emotional hurt/comfort, Diacre bashing (a lot of it)

Life went on. After the 5-1 thumping of Italy, France beat Belgium 2-1, thus finishing top of their group. They didn’t finish with maximum points, thanks to Iceland grabbing a penalty at the last minute.

And that’s when Kadidiatou Diani noticed the change in her fellow countrywoman.

“Hasn’t Wendie been acting rather…strange, Grace?” Diani asked Grace Geyoro as she closed her locker. They were cleaning up after their celebration of the game that night, even though it was late.

“Hmm…I don’t know.” Geyoro finished untying her ponytail and frowned in thought. “Maybe? She’s been very quiet recently…sort of.”

“She’s only quiet when we’re happy,” Sakina Karchaoui piped up, folding her “lucky towel”. “Then whenever we have a problem, she hovers around us all, making sure we’re all okay, even three times after we tell her so.”

Diani glanced at Griedge Mbock Bathy. She just shrugged, which Diani found as slightly suspicious. Bathy was one of Renard’s best friends--how come even she didn’t know what could have possibly been up with her?

“If I didn’t know better I’d say Wendie’s being nice, but this isn’t just niceness,” Marie-Antoinette Katoto pointed out before Diani could say anything. Her knee was wrapped in a protective cast and elevated on a barstool. “She’s definitely pushing herself. Kadi, what should we do?”

Everybody turned to Diani for answers. She was one of the most experienced in the whole squad, and by default the leader when Renard wasn’t around.

“The first question isn’t how we stop this,” Diani said after some thought, pacing the dressing room. “It’s why Wendie’s like this, that’s what we need to ask.”

“But how?” Selma Bacha asked. “Wendie will just say she’s fine.” She sighed. “Like she always does.”

“Is it Pogba again?!” Delphine Cascarino suddenly exclaimed, grabbing her fairy pink, peony and camilla embroidered boxing gloves and throwing a few air-punches. “Because if he broke her heart again, I’m kicking his butt.”

“Nah, Wendie hates him like the plague! She won’t even give him a second chance to walk next to her, much less date. No,” Geyoro decided, “this is different.”

“But how different, Grace?” Karchaoui countered. “We can’t know like this.”

“You’re damn right!” Katoto pronounced. “We’ll have to search her room for evidence!”

“YEAH!” Karchaoui whooped.

But everybody else, bar Bacha, just groaned. “MARIE!”

*

Bacha knocked on Renard’s room door, and the group waited for the reply. Usually it would be a cheery “Entrez!” or a “who is it?”, but now there was no answer whatsoever.

“You think she’s sleeping?” Cascarino wondered. “Wendie always answers the door.”

Diani glanced at her watch. The silver hands showed 4:23 A.M.

“I don’t know, Delphine,” she said. “Let’s check.”

She pushed open the door and stuck her head in. The shades were down, but the lights were off and Renard wasn’t in bed.

“Strange,” Geyoro mused as the six--for some reason, Bathy had opted out of assisting them in their investigation--entered the hotel room. “Where could you be?”

“I hear water!” Bacha announced, jumping onto the bed. “Cozy.”

“Two damn hoots.” Katoto rolled her eyes. “It means she’s showering, you--”

“MARIE!” Cascarino growled, glaring at the striker. “Stop that!”

Diani ignored them. She was too busy inspecting Renard’s kitchenette. It only contained the bare essentials--and that was what alarmed the winger.

“Wendie always samples the desserts wherever we go!” She closed the freezer with a sigh. “Not even ice cream. She’s got no sweets in here!”

“Then no wonder she’s sad!” Karchaoui piped up. “She needs sugar!”

“Hmm…low blood sugar can be a cause of mood swings," Geyoro remembered. “Maybe we should pick something up for her? Ice cream? Croissants?”

“Nah…” Bacha wracked her brain for her captain’s favorite sweet. “Aha! Macarons!”

“Great memory, Selma,” Cascarino praised her younger teammate. “But where do we find some? Not in Tesco, that’s for sure.”

“There’s a French bakery in Sainsburg half an hour from here, and it’s still open!” Karchaoui waved her phone in the air. “Let’s get some sweets, girls!”

“Well, we know you’re not gonna drive,” Katoto pointed out. “You mind, Grace?”

“Nope. You can’t drive with that knee anyways.”

“So is her knee supposed to be amputated, then?!”

“Sakina, shut up!”

Around five A.M, a still-awake Renard creaked the door open. She started out to check on her teammates, but then tripped on a pink gift bag. Too tired to even be curious about its contents, she dumped it onto the counter and went on.

*

“It’s three days before the match and Wendie still seems upset,” Griedge Mbock Bathy reported as she came down for breakfast the next day. “For what reason, I have no idea.”

“Maybe she’s just going through a blue period or something,” Karchaoui speculated, reaching for the toast platter. She took a piece and began to spread it thick with orange marmalade. “It just happens.”

“Don’t use too much marmalade, Sakina,” Corrine Diacre cautioned her without even looking up from her laptop. “It will mar your performance.”

“Yes, manager,’ Karchaoui sighed, scraping some marmalade off her toast. “But what’s wrong with Wendie?”

“I don’t see any difference,” Diacre spoke up, still not looking up as she sipped her coffee. “Maybe she slept late. Wendie frowns. She’s quiet. It’s normal.”

The way that Diacre said it’s normal alarmed the seven. Had Renard been in a bad mood for that long?

“I hope it’s not too serious,” Diani muttered, peeling a tangerine. “What do you think, Pauline?”

“Eh?” Peyraud-Magnan looked up from her bowl of strawberries. “Think about what?”

Cascarino shook her head. “You zoned out again, Pauline. It’s Wendie. She’s been acting strange lately.”

“Hmm, didn’t notice.” Peyraud-Magnan put down her pen, holding up a dove-gray notebook. “Been busy.”

“You’ve been journaling?” Bacha popped up from nowhere, peeking over Peyraud-Magnan’s shoulder. “Can I see?”

“It’s a diary,” Peyraud-Magnan protested, turning a tiny key inside the lock. “Wendie gave it to me. She said it’s ‘good venting’.”

Before any of them could respond, a yawn heralded Renard’s arrival at the table. She groaned, but politely greeted Diacre before taking a seat.

“Selma!” Renard ruffled Bacha’s hair, offering a smile at the youngster. “How’d you sleep?”

As Bacha chattered away, Diani took the time to study the defender. Renard looked exhausted, with bloodshot eyes and slightly messy hair, but was still forcing herself to smile and act responsible and supportive and--well, like the lion-hearted leader that she was normally. Diani couldn’t help but groan at this, causing both Renard and Diacre to glance at her.

“Do you have something to share with us, Kadidiatou?” Diacre poured another cup of coffee and tapped away at her laptop.

Diani froze--she really didn’t want to share her observations with her manager. She could be so strict sometimes. “Uh…”

“We did wonderfully in the Iceland game. But we were unfortunate to draw at the last minute.” Fortunately for Diani, Renard intervened. She quietly eyed the rest of her team until they turned their attention to her--a particularly useful skill of hers.

“Now we must focus on the next game.” Renard yawned and went on. “No matter what happens, we must put up a fight. Who’s with me?” She finished off her speech with false but convincing enthusiasm, prompting a round of cheers around the table.

“Now.” The skipper gestured towards Diacre. “Let’s hear from our manager on the tactics.”

Diacre took this as her cue to start going on about the importance of a central striker for the fifth time since the night before, and Diani almost wished that Renard hadn’t spoken.

*

“It’s two days before the match and Wendie’s still upset,” Bathy reported, walking into the break room. “I have no idea why, but the sooner we know, the better.”

“She needs a break, Griedge!” Katoto groaned as if it was the most obvious thing on earth. “She needs a break from all this damn pressure!”

“MARIE!” Diani groaned, setting aside her magazine. “No, but Marie has a point, girls.”

“We should swear more?”

“NO!”

Karchaoui took that as her moment to shine. “I think Kadi meant that we should take Wendie away from here. The pressure is stressing her out.”

“I can see why with me being injured and everything,” Katoto pointed out. “And the media doesn’t help.”

“We can take her out to eat!” Bacha suggested, tossing down her kazoo. “That always helps me feel better.”

“Great idea, Selma!” Bathy nodded in approval. “Now let’s put our thinking caps on and decide where.”

*

“So, where are we going?” Renard asked Bathy as the minivan rolled along the asphalt. “To train?”

“Ha! Wendie, you know training won’t be just the nine of us,” Diani chuckled, steering the vehicle down the lanes. “And we wouldn’t rent a Volkswagen just to go to training.”

“A Volkswagen? Nice,” Renard commented, running her hand over the leather seats. “Makes me feel safe. A nice, safe German car.”

“Um…Wendie?” Diani turned towards the back row. “Volkswagen was originally Dutch.”

“There goes the safety bit,” Renard muttered under her breath, much to her teammates’ amusement. “But seriously, where are we going?”

“Oh…Kadi just thought we should eat out tonight. You know, celebrate our good run,” said Katoto, rehearsing the tale they’d spun to prevent Renard from finding out the truth. “So we’re going to a new restaurant a friend told me about.”

“That’s right!” Cascarino chimed in. “It’s called the Hygge House.”

Renard frowned. “Hygge House? What’s that?”

Bacha just flashed Renard a toothy grin. “You’ll find out soon enough.”

They pulled up in front of a building that seemed more like a house than a commercial store. Yet the words HYGGE HOUSE were clearly painted in red letters, strung on a banner.

“This is it?” Diani wondered aloud. When Katoto had told them about the Hygge House, she hadn’t imagined a cabin-style house on the border of the woods, with a chalk sign displaying the day’s specials. “It looks like your average, middle-class small business.”

“Small business, yes! Average? Not so much.” A blond, smiling man in a checked button-down stepped out from behind a tree. “Are you Marie?”

“I am!” Katoto approached the man, shaking his hand. “And you’re Chris, right?”

“Correct you are!” He faced the rest of them, offering a lopsided grin. “You may or may not recognize me--”

“I do!” Karchaoui piped up, pointing to the blonde. “You’re Christian Eriksen, from Tottenham!”

“Tottenham?!” Eriksen couldn’t help but chuckle as he high-fived Karchaoui. “That was in 2018, Sakina. I’ve played for three other clubs since then. What about you? Still playing for Lyon?”

“As always!” Karchaoui gestured towards the eight standing behind her. “And these are Selma, Griedge, Marie, Kadi, Pauline, Delphine, Grace, and Wendie, our captain!”

“I can see that!” Eriksen quickly pulled open the door, waving the group in. “Right this way, ladies!”

He waited for everybody to go inside before he pulled Karchaoui aside. “Is Wendie okay?” he asked her, running a hand through his hair. “She seems a little…down, for some reason.”

“Yeah.” Karchaoui sighed, toying with her own dark, glossy ponytail. “That’s why we brought her here. We think some time away from the French camp’s pressure will help her relax.”

“Then you’ve come to the right place!” The Dane pulled open the main dining room door. “See?”

The dining room’s warm cream walls were lined with booth tables, with several wooden tables and chairs for more formal occasions. Gauzy, patterned curtains hung from wooden rods, and the floor was solid pine, knotholes and tree rings weaving through the warm sea of golden tan.

“It’s just like my kitchen at home!” Peyraud-Magnan pulled Bacha into a booth. “The napkins are regular paper!”

“Cool saltshakers!” said Geyoro, holding up a shaker in the shape of a fat, bewhiskered Italian chef.

“Thanks! We get them really cheap from thrift stores. You know, the knick-knacks that Great-Aunt Betty had in her attic but nobody wants now.”

Nobody even laughed. Renard tried to smile for politeness’ sake, but even she couldn’t find a fake laugh in her. Seeing his joke had fallen flat, Eriksen handed them each a menu before his pocket buzzer lit up. Quickly explaining that he had another set of customers and that someone else would be back to collect their orders, he strode off, leaving the nine to their own devices.

“Huh! Meatballs for 7 pounds! That’s not bad at all.” Geyoro glanced at Diani, pointing to the entree list. “What do you think?”

“I think we should start small.” Diani pointed to another list on the menu. “How about some non-alcoholic beverages?”

Bathy groaned, while Karchaoui burst into laughter.

“What’s the matter, Griedge?” Diani chuckled, setting down the menu. “Were you expecting rose?”

“No alcohol.” Renard spoke for the first time since they’d arrived, cracking a smile. “Or you’ll become like Eden Hazard’s career--totally wasted!”

Bacha, Karchaoui, Bathy and Peyraud-Magnan erupted into laughter, while Diani nodded in approval. Renard was starting to relax--a good sign.

Another blond, taller than Eriksen, walked up to them with a pen and paper. He introduced himself as Simon--which was a big mistake.

“Simon?! As in Simon Cowell?!?!” Bacha squealed, almost jumping on the poor guy. “I’ve heard so much about you! How’s BGT going? Did you see Aaron or Champagne? What about Sarah Ikumu, or Heavenly Joy Jerkins? Is Amanda with you or Paula Abdul?”

“Not that Simon!” he groaned. “I’m Simon Kjaer! The defender!”

“Fine.” Bacha sank back down in her seat, pouting. “Although Simon Cowell would be way cooler.”

Diani and Renard both shrugged in apology. Kjaer didn’t seem miffed, though, as he whipped out his notepad. “Now, what would you ladies like?”

Peyraud-Magnan ordered lime and mint sparkling water, while Diani chose a raspberry one. Bacha and Cascarino ordered pink lemonade, Karchaoui opted for dragon fruit sparkling water, and Geyoro and Katoto picked out pineapple sparkling water.

Renard and Bathy, though, decided to go rogue. They ordered a new coconut-ginger sparkling drink, much to Kjaer’s pleasure?”

“You really want to try that one?” Kjaher asked the center backs. “It’s a new item. Andreas added it after his summer holiday in Tahiti.”

“Then we’ll be your first customers!” Renard announced. “Roll ‘em out, Simon!”

*

Fifteen minutes later, Karchaoui decided that the Hygge House had to be the coolest restaurant in all of Rotherham.cNot only were the settings and staff great, but the drinks were awesome!

“Isn’t this nice, Kadi?” she asked the forward. “The drinks are really good!”

“Yeah!” Bacha set her empty glass down, grinning at Diani. “I still can’t believe they prepared them in front of us, in real time!”

“How’s your sparkling coconut water, ‘new customers’?” Cascarino joked. “Like paradise?”

“I can definitely taste the hibiscus,” Bathy commented, draining her glass. “What about you, Wendie?”

“It’s sweet and light…but this water is as flat as a sheet!” Renard set her glass down. “Would a few more bubbles really bust their budget so much?”

“It doesn’t exactly help if you keep stirring it, Wendie,” Diani pointed out. “You have to drink it without stirring!”

“Nice time to tell me that,” Renard snarked, but she polished off the rest with a laugh. “But seriously, they struck gold here.”

“Now who’s hungry?” Cascarino took out the menus, passing them around. “I know I am!”

“Agreed,” said Diani, and they immersed themselves into their menus.

Diani was busy trying to choose between pasta or rice when she felt a tap on her shoulder. Bacha was next to her and Karchaoui was in the other row, so it wasn’t either of them--so who was it.

Wait… That cologne! She had only ever known one person who wore it…

“Ibou!” she exclaimed, rising from her seat to high-five the defender. “How’s it going, bro?”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Cascarino grabbed her boxing gloves, glaring at the newest addition to their table. “Dude, you ain’t no Diani! You’re Ibou Konate!”

“True.” Konate dragged up a seat. “But me and Kadi have known each other for quite a while, right?”

“Right,” the winger confirmed, turning back to her teammates. “We met a few years back and we’ve been exchanging news ever since.”

“Don’t you play at Liverpool, Ibou?” Bacha asked him. “The team?”

Konate smirked, sitting down next to Diani. “Yeah. Kadi knows all about the chaos there. I don’t even need to say any more. By the way.” He turned his attention to Renard, flashing her a smile. “Congrats on your latest UCL, Wendie.”

“Thanks,” said the skipper. “Sorry about you losing yours.”

“Yeah, it was tough at first. But thanks to the boss, we got over it.”

“Your boss helped you get over it?” Renard asked, surprised. “I mean…he did!”

“Uh-huh, he’s a good boss. He has this really weird owl, though, and he trips over his own feet a lot--but we need him here!”

“Ibou!” a very German voice boomed from another dining room. “You’ll miss them tossing the seafood salad!”

“Speaking of which.” Konate pushed the chair back in its place. “It was nice seeing you again, Kadi!”

“Same here.” Diani shook hands with Konate, waving him off. “Until next time, Ibou!”

“Good luck on your quarterfinal!” he yelled, disappearing into the other dining room.

Diani nodded, still smiling from running into her friend again. But as she noticed that Renard’s own smile had faded once Konate had mentioned their boss, she began to wonder if it was just the tournament pressure that was bothering her.

*

“We should come here with the rest of PSG, right Kadi?” Geyoro twirled a particularly long strand of spaghetti with her fork. She had ended up getting her meatballs, along with some green vegetables in a cream sauce. Bacha and Karchaoui had pronounced it suspicious, and their guesses of what it was were growing more ridiculous by the minute.

“Brussels sprouts!” Bacha guessed. “See, they’re in tiny balls.”

“Mini bok choy!” Karchaoui insisted. “They’re darker!”

“Spinach balls!”

“Broccoli florets!”

“Sea kale!”

“Regular kale!”

“Green radicchio!”

“Belgian endive!”

“Asparagus!”

“Mustard greens!”

“You idiot! It’s obviously--”

“Enough!” Geyoro yelled, hands over her ears. “I can’t take your bickering anymore! It’s lettuce.”

“Lettuce?” Bacha pouted, glaring at the plate. “So disappointing.”

“Okay, the Hygge House has surprised me,” Peyraud-Magnan mumbled through a mouthful of salmon terrine. “Who knew a bunch of Danish footballers could cook so well? Me and Sara should try this back in Italy.”

“You mean in Juventus?” Karchaoui scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Sara can’t even cook a cannoli without burning it!”

“If she was still in England, then she could take cooking lessons from Eriksen!”

“Actually, I don’t do the cooking,” Eriksen admitted, walking past their table with a dolley full of covered plates. “But I do have a question: weren’t there nine at your table?”

Of course there are, Diani burned to shoot back. Can’t you count? But before she could land the blow, Bacha landed an even bigger one.

“Guys! Wendie’s gone!”

*

“Gone?!” Bathy screeched, frantically gesturing to the empty seat as if that would make Renard appear. “She can’t be gone! She was just right there!”

“Gone?” Geyoro gasped, holding onto her own seat as if the invisible force would whisk her away as well.

“Paul Pogba!” Cascarino growled, strapping on her boxing gloves. “Where is that despicable scoundrel?!”

“Geez, were you Jose Mourinho in another life?” Diani retorted. She grabbed Bathy’s hand, running a hand through her hair to calm her down. “But that’s beside the point! Where’d she go?”

“Wendie’s six foot three!” Karchaoui exclaimed, dragging Cascarino back into her seat. “She can’t disappear like that into nothingness.”

“Maybe she went to stretch her legs,” Peyraud-Magnan suggested, continuing to devour her meal. Ever since they had found out that Renard had disappeared, she had been the only one to continue eating.

Bathy, calmer now shook her head, pulling herself to a stand. “I think I know where she might be. Come on, Kadi.”

*

Renard had always loved grass--and not just the type used for playing fields. Something about the soft, scratchy blades always managed to soothe her. It was just so…alive.

Her feet were baking in the one spot of sunlight that filtered through the dense woods, but her stomach was an icy cavern. The leaves smelled damp and rotting and she was sure there were at least two dozen spiders under the logs--but at least she wouldn’t be getting in the way out here.

They had gone to the Hygge House, for her. Just to cheer her up. And she couldn’t even stay happy there, for their own sake. One mention of managers and quarterfinals was all it had taken to freeze any serotonin in her brain and send her mind into overdrive.

Her teammates, instead of using their precious time for themselves, were dedicating their precious time for her…because she couldn’t keep up the act long enough. It was supposed to be the other way around--she was supposed to help, love and support them, and she couldn’t even take care of her own problems?

She reached to clear the hair off her face and realized the leaves beneath her cheeks were slightly damper than she’d found them. Her mind fuzzed over before she could determine if they were raindrops or her own tears.

*

“How can a Cruyffing SIX FOOTER be this hard to find?!” Diani grumbled, using a Swiss army knife to cut away the vines blocking her path. When Bathy had explained that the two were going to search the woods to find Renard, Cascarino had insisted that they take her pocket knife.

“For good luck,” she’d said, handing Diani the pink pocket knife. “You never know when you may need it. You’re searching for the fox!”

“We searched the whole woods and found no sign of her.” But then Bathy spotted something. “Kadi, look!”

Diani did, and she immediately regretted doing so. There, in a pile of cut grass and leaf mould, laid their captain. She didn’t move at all--she just laid there, either asleep, or knocked out.

Bathy ran to Renard immediately, feeling all over her. Diani, unsure of what to do, watched on, too nervous even to pace.

“Her pulse and heartbeat are regular,” the centerback confirmed, finally rising from Renard’s side. “We’ll need to stabilize her and move her back to the Hygge House.”

“I just don’t get it.” Diani shook her head, inspecting for broken bones. While Bathy was the one with emergency medical training, she’d seen the medics operate enough times to know what to do. “Why would she come here?”

“No idea. Wendie does like to lay in grass, but this deep in the woods? Nah.” Bathy took a large, flattish piece of wood, called it a splint, and tied it in various places onto Renard with her shoelaces. “It’s not like her at all.”

They improvised a stretcher from a very long log and prepared to leave for the Hygge House. Renard, while slim, was heavy, and both Diani and Bathy had to carry the stretcher-log through the vines, watching their step as they traversed the shadowy leaf floor.

“Griedge, a snake!” Diani whispered, frozen in place. A brown serpent had coiled itself along a tree trunk, double-forked tongue sliding in and out of its poison-trap jaws.

“Don’t look into its eyes,” said the elder of the pair. “Don’t drop the stretcher!”

They went on for about twenty feet before Bathy grew tired. Setting Renard on a flat section of ground, they stopped to rest by a murky stream.

“Shouldn’t we wake her up, Griedge?” Diani groaned, massaging her shoulders in a desperate attempt to rid them of the soreness. “My arms are sore, and my fingers are growing numb.”

“You’re right Kadi, so are mine. Let’s wake her up.”

Bathy gently shook Renard’s arm, pinching her fingers. Upon seeing that she still wasn’t waking up, she tapped her hands, then slapped her cheeks.

“Come on, Wendie!” she repeated, her voice growing more and more desperate by the second. “Wake up!”

*

“Wake UP, Wendie! We’ve got to grow old together! We have to be old ladies together!”

Finally, Renard’s eyes fluttered open. After a fleeting moment where it seemed that her eyelashes were made of lead, she finally managed to keep them open.

“Oh, thank God!” Bathy hovered over Renard, braids swinging behind her. “Wendie? Can you hear me?”

“G-G-Griedge?” Why was that so hard to say? The Frenchwoman couldn’t help but groan; she couldn’t manage to say her own friend’s name without stuttering.

“Wendie!” Bathy’s hand grasped her own sweaty one. “Are you okay?”

No! She wanted to scream at maximum volume. I’m NOT okay! Get me off this thing! But all she could manage was a strangled whine.

“Relax. I’m untying the splint,” she assured her as if she knew.

The strange string binding her head loosened before disappearing, followed by the ones around her torso, waist, hips, knees and ankles. Bathy helped Renard to a sitting position, holding her up like she was a small, wobbly toddler still learning to walk. “Better now?”

Renard just nodded, not trusting herself to speak without struggling again. She then realized that Diani had been sitting on a nearby rock, watching them the whole time, and shook her head. She could already feel the blush burning up her face.

“Are you hurt?” Bathy kept her questions simple as she felt through Renard’s hair for bumps. “Do your legs hurt?”

A shake of the head. No.

“Does your head hurt?”

A head shake. No, but I’d do anything to remove the fuzziness.

“Your neck? Torso?”

A head shake. No, but could somebody tell me why my voice sounds so…broken?

“Any organs hurt?”

A shake of the head. No…but maybe my heart? Figuratively? I don’t know.

“W-where am I?” It was something Renard felt like she had to ask. Until she stopped sounding so…shaky to the point where she could scare her teammates, she’d only speak when it was absolutely necessary.

“You’re in the woods. The same one you ran away into.” Bathy got closer to her, and it was only then that Renard could see the tears pooling in her friend’s eyes. “Wendie, why?”

Instead of answering, Renard let her gaze fall to the ground. I failed you. “I-I…”

“You were passed out underneath those trees,” Bathy went on, choking up on her words. “And…you stayed passed out for the whole time. I kept shaking you…for three minutes. They were the longest three minutes ever.”

“I…G-Griedge!” And she was weary; and so strained and so vexed at her own inability to shield everyone, not just from Diacre, but herself; that she thrashed out, accidentally striking Bathy on the cheek.

“WHAT?!” Diani leapt from the rock, unable to watch on any longer. “WENDELINE!”

“Kadi, arrête ça!” Bathy hissed. “You’re scaring her!”

“WHY did you do that?! All we wanted to do was find you, and--”

“Kadi.”

“--and you just hit her like that?! You ungrateful--”

“Kadi!”

“--you PASSED OUT! Do you know how much you scared us? Delphine was going to punch Pogba--”

“KADIDIATOU Diani!”

“Y-yes?”

When she didn’t hear any answer, Diani decided to take a look at her teammates. She instantly regretted the past…well, about the past seven things she said.

Bathy held a sobbing Renard as close as humanly possible, not even bothered to shoot piercing glares at Diani anymore. She was too focused on the other woman.

“Shhh…easy there.”

Diani could’ve sworn she never felt more awkward. “Um…we’re going home, right?”

Bathy nodded, as if she’d just barely heard what Diani had said. “Mm.”

*

They managed to make it back to the Hygge House before nighttime, but just barely. When they reached the parking lot, the sun was almost completely gone.

“So.” Renard, who had calmed down significantly but still seemed a bit off, pointed to the door. “We aren’t going to alarm the others, right? If they ask, we just say--”

“Wendie,” Bathy cajoled her, gently but firmly. “We can’t just do that.”

“We can’t?”

“No.” Bathy gazed into Renard’s eyes. They were deep brown, as always, but part of the light in them was missing. “We definitely don’t have to tell the others…not immediately at least. But Kadi and I need to know why you ran away.”

The skipper groaned, running a hand through her hair. “Do I have a choice in this?”

“None whatsoever.”

“Fine.” She sighed as she mustered the courage to face the other two. “I’m…I’m nervous. About the match.”

“The match?” Diani rolled her eyes, as she thought about the upcoming fixture against the Netherlands. “It can’t be about their forwards. You’re going to annihilate them like a bunch of toddlers with stuffed animals.”

Renard laughed, still bitter. “We couldn’t keep a clean sheet the whole group stage.”

“Because they gave Iceland that stupid penalty!” Diani protested.

“And we still drew because of that.”

Diani shuddered at the memory of that particular game. She couldn’t help but think of all the chances she’d missed that Diacre had pointed out to her after the match.

“You were too slow over there, and over there! And where did your positioning go?! You’ll want to hit the gym soon,” the brunette had lectured her, crossing her arms. “Or you’re going to cost us a game!”

“I don’t know what was wrong with me today, boss,” Diani had begun, remembering the best way to de-escalate her manager’s anger. It wasn’t for nothing that Renard had pulled the whole team into the empty press-conference room the day they’d arrived to give them advice on how to avoid fights with Diacre. “It was like lead was on my feet.”

“Better unshackle the lead soon, then.” Diacre had pulled out a brochure and set it on her desk. Diani could see the words Weight Loss for Athletes on the front cover, in bold red letters. “Or I may have to do to you what I did to Amadine--limit your dessert.”

Diani snapped out of her reverie to see Renard watching her, waiting for an answer. There wasn’t any malice in her gaze, but Diani couldn’t help but feel a little intimidated--she was six foot two, after all. And that was minus the hair!

“Wendie, you’re the best defender on the whole squad,” Diani pointed out.

“Come on! Griedge is my other half on the pitch.”

“Where did all your Champion's League and Ligue 1 medals come from, then?”

“Okay,” she confessed, “it’s not just that. It’s Melvine.”

Oh, right, Diani remembered. Melvine Malard was one of their breakthrough strikers. She’d scored in the first minute in her debut, replacing the injured Katoto in a position that wasn’t even her natural place to begin with. But after briefly touching upon that, Renard had reported that Diacre had only seen the flaws.

“You need to be more efficient!” the bespectacled manager had insisted, after showing all the chances Malard could have made. “Marie would have scored half of those, blindfolded!”

“Diacre, you’ve always been hard on Melvine,” Renard protested, standing up from the wooden chair she currently occupied. When Diacre had called Malard from the locker room for a talk, Renard had insisted that she come along as well. She would have done the same with Diani in a heartbeat, but Diacre had roped her into the office as soon as they’d reached the tunnel.

“She’s not a centre forward like Marie, she’s a winger,” Renard had tried to reason with her. She had no idea if it was her own self, or leftover adrenaline from the match, but something in her was telling her to confront Diacre. “She’s playing this position for the first time with her new team, of course she’d be a bit shaky--”

“Did I ask for your opinion, Renard?” Diacre snapped, and the centerback couldn’t help but shrink back into her seat. “No, I did not. You are not the coach. You do not know what’s best for this team.”

“Diacre, if I may be so bold as to add something--”

“SILENCE!!!”

Renard shrugged in apology, hoping that Malard would catch it. But apparently, she didn’t, and Renard realized that she would have to listen to Diacre bashing one of her teammates--again.

“No matter how much Melvine tries, she’s not a central striker,” Renard went on upon seeing Bathy’s concerned looks at Diani. “So with Marie out…”

“There’s Sandy,” Diani argued. Sandy Baltimore was Diani’s PSG teammate. “She’s a winger, but she can play central.”

“Kadi, Diacre won’t play Sandy and we all know it. And she left out Eugenie, even though she was one of our best strikers at the World Cup.”

There’s the negativity about Diacre again, Diani noticed. Just like when she talked with Sara Gama.

“We can always try, Wendie! Look at Liverpool,” Bathy pointed out. “Who scores the most, almost every season?”

Renard shrugged, not seeing the point of bringing the English team into the conversation. “Mo Salah.”

“And he’s a winger. There’s the false 9 system! It won them a Champion's League! We can do this!” The defender gripped Renard’s hand in encouragement, gazing into her eyes once again. “Wendie, you are the strongest, tallest defender I know. You’re so smart, and you adapt your game to help us, even in positions you shouldn’t have to play in. You’re brave, and you’re like a lioness--a very good-looking lioness--”

“Griedge!!!”

“--with a giant heart. You protect us, and you always know what to do.” She finished with a determined nod. “It’s normal to worry about this stuff, Wendie. You don’t need to hide it from us. I know Diacre isn’t the most…approachable, but you’ve got us!” Her voice grew quieter, but still had that tint of stubborn, indomitable hope at the edges. “If you’re not okay, the team isn’t, either. You must be okay--and don’t get any ideas about hiding how you feel, Wendie. You have to actually be--”

“WENDIE! You’re back!”

Before anybody could say anything, Bacha hurtled out the front doors of the Hygge House. Bursting at the seams with joy, she threw herself at Renard, almost knocking her over.

“We missed you!” she squealed, her ponytail bouncing in the air. “It was a long time!”

“Oof--glad to see you all bouncy, Selma!” It was times like these that Renard was glad she was the tallest member of her squad. A few inches less, and Bacha would’ve knocked her to the pavement.

“Where were you?” Bacha went on, scanning the three for answers as if they were supermarket barcodes. “You were gone for so long…”

“WENDELINE!”

“Great,” Diani muttered as Karchaoui and Cascarino bounded towards them. The latter still had her boxing gloves on--a bad sign.

“Okay, who am I punching?” Cascarino made it Renard first, holding up a gloved fist. “Pogba, or somebody else?”

“Hmmm…I don’t know.” Renard had a mischievous glint in her eyes as she cooked up a reply. “Maybe Beerenstyn? Miedema? Dominique Janssen? Any Dutch will do, pick your favorite.”

“Alright, what about your teammate in Lyon, Van de Donk?”

“Huh?”

“I’m punching her!”

“Not LITERALLY, imbecile!”

“Wendie is officially back!” Karchaoui opened the door. “Let’s go back in for dinner!”

“Yeah!” Bacha cheered, dragging Renard away. “Eriksen was just about to frost the cake!”

Diani followed behind her teammates, paying close attention to Renard. She was chatting away with Bacha, Karchaoui and Cascarino, enjoying herself--for now.

There had already been two incidents that hinted that there was more that Renard was stressing about. Unfortunately, the skipper showed no signs of sharing anything whatsoever.

And so Diani would continue to watch and wait, until Renard dropped the next hint.

#wendie renard #griedge mbock #griedge mbock bathy #selma bacha #grace geyoro #kadidiatou diani #marie antoinette katoto #delphine cascarino #pauline peyraud magnin #christian eriksen #simon kjær #simon kjaer #france women #france women's national team #denmark national team #brentford #ol feminin #olympique lyonnais #ac milan #soccer fanfiction by lynn #soccer fanfiction #football imagine #football blurb #football fanfic

[ask-kenny-boi]

I guess its ok? Though it makes them want to protect me more even though I can protect myself

#anon #protection squad #shorty #I'm short? #wendy testaburger #bebe stevens #leopold stotch #tweek tweak #butters stotch #kenny mccormick #sp kenny #sp wendy #sp bebe #sp butters #sp tweek #them girls fight #they tough

[mrpenguinpants]

Genshin: Roommate HCs [V1]

To be honest, I just wanted to ramble some more and let my brainworms take over. This is sorta late but Happy Valentine’s everyone! I was gonna post this earlier but this honestly took me a long time to write so I moved it to today. 

Once again, this is 90% crack 10% content. Seriously, as much as I love writing this non-serious fics. Why do you people like this?

—

Based off my ramblings with Keqing anon: Link

Genshin: Holding Hands [V1]

Genshin: When you’re cold [V1]

Genshin: University AU [V1]

Genshin: Royalty AU [V1]

[Masterlist]

—

[taglist]  <- if you want to be added, please read this first.

@youaskedfurret @diaxfeliz @wintergreen-aix @kaechu @thegayrubberducky @lovelykittycatmeow @yuunoagivesmelife​  @dokidokisama @rokipersonal​@minakohasmanyhusbandos​ @strwbrry-lia @tigerpriestess​ @yuu-yuukurotsuki​ @hanniejji​  @mikeysbike @unionwitch @musekala @sunnshiii​ @stanzastic @akaasea​ @xoneaboveallx​ @adoring-ghost​ @asheseiler​ @childelover​ @dilucsz​ @dai-tsukki-desu​ @thicmitten​ @nonniechan​ @htnicayh​ @genshins1mpact​ 

---

Diluc

What? Diluc has a roommate? Did you blackmail him in living with you? Is that even possible? Did you throw yourself in front of his car because you needed someone to pay for your student loans and the easiest way was to file a lawsuit? In this economy no one would blame you. Diluc seems like such the self-isolated character that would murder his roommate in cold blood but in reality, he act’s detached from the world because he forgot how to socialize and he’s desperately trying to cover it up without choking. That or he’s trying to learn how to astral project. If he could drink away the pain he would but instead he buys 20 packs of grape Kool-Aid and injects it into his veins. 

Does not and will not ever have a normal sleeping schedule. You’ll wake up to him working, come back home to him working, and will sleep to him still working. His daily dose of Vitamin D is from the brightness of his screen rather than the sun and he’s filter feeding at this point. It’s concerning. He’s going to crumble and he’s bringing the world down with him. Through the power of tax evasion. But as soon as he needs to walk out into society, he pulls movie magic and looks like perfection. It’s both physically and mentally disgusting. 

He’s actually is a really nice roommate to have just so long as you give him space. Great cook and knows to clean up after himself. Though he does have crash and burn days where’s he’s completely out of commission. You could set the entire apartment on fire and he would sleep through it. The entire two weeks are dedicated to zombie eye marathons and then he’ll suddenly collapse and sleep for 46 hours straight. When he wakes up from his hibernation he’s the most groggy and nonsensical person. His life blood is coffee because you keep hiding the 5 hour energy away from him because, you know, life is enjoyable and those cancer bottles will actually kill him.  

“University sucks our money out of our bodies faster than our will to live.” 

Beidou [Happy Birthday Queen 💕]

Despite her appearance, she’s actually really strong and it scares the piss out of you when you’re doing something or scrolling through your phone mindlessly and you suddenly get your spine re-arranged when she slaps you on the back to ask what you’re doing. Likewise, when she hoists you up and throws you over her shoulder so you come with her on her 3am convivence store raids for alcohol. It’s either you change now or else we’re walking out of the apartment in your t-shirt and no pants self. She can and will carry you under her arm that way. It’s both incredibly attractive and horrifying at the same time. 

She’s really friendly and a great talker if you’re alright with her “I must hold you in my arms, fresh prince of bel air style”. It doesn’t matter if you’re taller than her, she’s doing it. She does however, get in a bit of trouble from her rowdiness and you often get noise complaints but Beidou just passes them off to Ningguang and everything is fixed. She has ovaries of steel when neighbors rather confront her personally and she’s ready to 1v1 in the parking lot. You’re trying to desperately hold onto her shirt to stop her from pile driving your neighbors for the third time this week but she’s too strong.  

She’s constant party until we die attitude and suffers the hangover in the morning. It’s actually really funny to catch her in her hangover moods because whatever filter Beidou had, which is none, is gone. She really takes “cursing like a sailor” or the next level and the amount of creativity she comes up with is actually impressive. She can be a bit messy but she’s really likeable and always down to go anywhere with you as long as you’ll do the same. It’s a very ride together, we die together situation. You’re my best friend, you’re dying with me. I’ll see you in hell. 

“Imma T pose over my dad and then crash the car into the parking garage.” 

Kaeya

Kaeya on the surface seems like such a chill roommate. And he is for the most part. But he’s such an ass. Your things are his things, no questions asked. If you just bought a really nice sweater or you had leftover food, that’s his now. He’s innocent until proven guilty even if he’s literally holding your lunch. The pure amount of bullshit he can spit out to convince you that no, he did not pull the fire alarm because he wanted an excuse for not going to work, puts him on Shakespeare level. He’s also very pretty, way too pretty, sir can you share some of your genes? 

But aside from that, he’s actually super dependable. You forgot something at home? Sure, he has nothing better to do so he can bring them for you. We’re missing eggs? No problem, he’s just by the store. You’re 95% sure that he just wants to be cheeky and make you thank him for 20 minutes before he actually hands you what you asked for. It’s better for you if you never tell him anything you’re afraid of because Kaeya has no social cues, or more like he throws them out the window, and he’s probably a psychopath. 

He’s incredibly private of his room and things despite his attitude towards yours. You’re convinced he either has a secret lab or that’s where he’s storing the bodies. I was the good guy but due to unfortunate circumstances, I need to stab a bitch. But he’s a really good serious talker for those 3am, because everything happens at 3am, talks about life and the meaning of the universe. It absolutely wrecks your sleep schedule but some of the things you talk about are the most crackhead things like what’s the lowest amount of money someone would have to pay you to walk outside without clothes? It’s a legitimate question. 

“Never before have I been so offended with something I 100% agree with.”

Jean

Okay, what world did you save in a past life to live with his absolutely wonderful woman? Mother Teresa take a load off, take a seat. You have nothing to worry about. She’ll bring home little treats back home and it’s the most wholesome thing ever?? Is this what love and affection feels like? We’ve been starved for so long. She says it’s not a big deal and anyone would do it BUT THE MOMENT SOMEONE BUYS FOOD FOR YOU. IT’S A MAGICAL MOMENT. They are forever stuck in your will until proven otherwise. An absolute ray of sunshine that must be protected. 

She does get super busy so you don’t often see each other or get to hang out as much. She’s a bit of a workaholic but a lot more easier to talk her into taking a break. She’s also a pretty decent cook but she prefers baking and jesus christ, girl can you calm down? Be still my beating heart, I’ve been smitten. Has mother hen vibes that you’re not sure if she’s your roommate or if she adopted you into her family. It’s time to start a petition for the Jean protection squad. Given the opportunity, I would aggressively hold your hand. 

She’s always open to whatever you want to do. Any recommendations or things that you like she will try out at least once despite her busy schedule. She’s lowkey lonely because work consumes her so any time you want to hang out or do something together, she jumps on it like she’s feral. She get’s a bit shy to ask if she can join in on your plans because she doesn’t want to bother you or intrude no matter how many times you tell her that’s okay, she still get’s a bit iffy about it. Please save this girl before she trips. In your arms. Platonically. Just kidding haha. Unless?

“I can’t wait to see you happy and not hating everyone again haha.”

Childe

First impressions of Childe were great, until he opened his mouth and you realized how much of a two brain cell child(e) he was. He has two braincells because they constantly have to 1v1 in his brain. He’s lived with a lot of siblings so he has no social awareness or concept of privacy that you’re lucky if you come home and he’s half-dressed. It doesn’t matter if you’re 2 weeks older than him, he’s going to call you 82 years old and why your bones aren’t being fossilized at this point. He’s such a little shit, this fucker licks the yogurt lid peel.  

He get’s really restless when he’s stuck under house arrest, because apparently 1v1ing in the parking lot of a Wendy’s is illegal for some reason, so he makes dying whale noises until he get’s to go outside again. But he’s actually a really wholesome guy, probably because of his younger siblings, that he’ll sometimes get you something because you seemed down and it’s such whiplash? Who is this man and where did he come from? You’re starting to have a change of heart before he tells you that he got banned from the library for accidently punching the school’s computer. How you “accidently” punch something you have no idea but Childe always comes home with some sort of injury. Maybe he’s just incredibly clumsy. For your sanity, you’re going to go with that. 

He’s actually so uncultured that it’s crippling. You can’t blame him too much considering his upbringing and it’s great that he’s so interested in learning new things but...child no...It makes you want to take your spine out of your ass and rip it like a Beyblade. Watching him take chopsticks and stab his food like it’s marshmallows makes you want to fall into a blackhole and let the chair consume you. 

“I, too, fantasize about beating the living shit out of people.”

---

Is this another tag yourself game cause I resonate with Diluc. I’m crying in insomnia. As much as I enjoy writing these fics I absolutely hate tagging them. I remember I used to have a tag anon but that was back when I wrote for bnha. 

Valentine’s Day was fun tho. I had a drinking game with friends as we played league then ended it off with a movie night. 

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin imagines #genshin impact imagines #genshin fanfic #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin headcanons #genshin impact headcanons #genshin crack #genshin impact crack #genshin impact childe #childe x reader #genshin childe x reader #genshin impact diluc #diluc x reader #genshin diluc x reader #genshin impact beidou #beidou x reader #genshin beidou x reader #genshin impact jean #genshin jean x reader #jean x reader #genshin impact kaeya #kaeya x reader #genshin kaeya x reader

[sun-sunny]

Can you make a headcanon of South park you don't have to do it if you don't want to

Ofc, who would take up a chance to rant about south park?

Clyde is a third wheel for craig and tweek, hes with them so much now he calls them the "no homo boyfreinds" craig hates it Tweek just thinks its another joke

Tricia (craigs little sister) is lesbian and has a crush on Karen whos also lesbian

Kenny is pangender and pansexual he has a soft spot for pan jokes (tho hes very picky about who said it and how its said)

Marjorine/Butters is mtf and is bisexual

Craig is a little weakling when it comes to physical fighting, Tweek can beat ass tho

Going off if the last one, Craig always starts crap and Tweek finishes it for him

At this point im not sure if CATG is a Tweek protection squad or if its Tweek protecting the squad

Cartman has a crush on Kyle, in some twisted way, but Kyle doesnt like him back

Bradely from the ep cartman sucks has more screen time / j

Craig is a 'shove it in your face' 'move im gay' kinda gay and Tweek is the 'oh right im gay' kinda gay

Craig liked being the little spoon when him and tweek cuddle

I have two hcs for tweek and craigs first kiss and they are always at war.

1 of them is when they first kissed Craig was like halve asleep and went in fot the kiss but he missed and kissed Tweek on cheek and went "fuck wrong spot"

Number 2 is tweek feel and was worried after he fell on his face and craig bandaged him up anf after they kissed but since their such awkward teens in this one it was weird and awkward and tweek cut his tongue on craigs braces

Oh yeah craig has braces

Stfu bebes a lesbian

Clyde liked bebe for a bit but she came out so he got over her (still has a softspot for her ofc) he then started likeing wendy, but then turns out wendy and bebe where dateing so

Creekyde, thats all.

At craig and tweeks wedding Jimmy was Tweeks best man and Token was Craigs, Clyde got to give a speach tho and shared some embarrassing Creek moments

Craig gets Tweek aspirin from caffeine withdrawal (those head aches hurt so fucking much ugh)

Tricia likes doing nail art so she'll paint Craig and Tweeks nails, maybe even have a spa day

Tweek was the first to find out Tricia was lesbian, he got her a pride flag after (obvi makeing sure she was ok with people knowing)

Thats all, for now

#not spell checked #no beta we die like kenny #south park #sp tweek #tweek tweak #craig tucker #sp craig #craig x tweek #creek #creek sp #south park craig #south park bendy #bebe #bebe stevens #sp bebe #sp wendy #sp tricia #sp karen #south park clyde