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#weird pairing
bloodyhellel · 1 year
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I love when I open up enough to someone for telling him I am into fanfictions and can ship any pairing and they are like " sound good, I don't understand why you think I would consider it as weird".
And then one night at 1 AM you'll tell them that you are writing a romance in your head about the slenderman and a strange figure in a GIF and then they will be like "Wtf dude ?" And "what's wrong with you" but always end up by " If you doesn't exist me would have to create you " (French's popular saying) and " But that how I love you"
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whumpsimp · 8 months
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have the random strong urge to write Discord/Among us fic where minecraft is Discords hot ex and they swear they're just friends but Among us has the dreading suspicion that they are but a breif fling and will never have the same history like they did.
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catastrothy · 9 months
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Bee girl and slimegirl made of honey. Thats yuri
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truly this is yuri
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ryllen · 4 months
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still on with the vegetable debate 🥗🥬🥒🥦🚜🧑‍🌾
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mipexch · 4 months
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stuck in hell's grasp for all eternity but at least you have another blood thirsty robot with parts you definitely don't want to steal
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lunacias · 1 month
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these are the silt verses, and I name our disciples thus
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waitineedaname · 3 months
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not romantic or platonic but a secret third thing (bonded pair)
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carrotkicks · 10 months
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chuuya-ranpo partnership. double... hat?. double brown? double short. well, you agree
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virgamsysxvolumes · 1 year
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Is It Really a Misunderstanding?
"I'm gettin' real fuckin' sick of Vlad Masters, Jazz." Danny hissed his blue eyes almost glowing with his repressed anger.
[Oof, what'd he do now?] Jazz's voice sounded as exhausted over the phone as Danny felt.
"This man, this beast stalked me all the way out to fucking Gotham and then had the audacity, the absolute gall to be upset with me for not following him back to his creepy fucking castle to play out his twisted vision of a Perfect Family. He won't even acknowledge the child he used me to create because she's not the son he wanted. What about what I wanted?!"
[Ugh, he's such a gross creep.] Jazz acknowledged, prompting Danny to continue venting.
"I was fourteen! He tortured me with electricity so he could use me to create her then just fucking rejects her because she's not a boy?! What the fuck is that!? Then I can't even keep her in the house for nearly a year because my fucking parents are such bigots that they would have taken the first opportunity to vivisect her if she slipped in front of them and showed any of her powers." Danny's voice shook there, as though repressing the urge to just burst into stressed tears.
"Then that fucking animal just outs us all to my shitty parents and ruins our lives and nearly gets my daughter killed and then has the fucking balls to decide that that means I no longer have any reason to refuse him! As though I would ever just go along with that monster. He's absolutely deranged! I had to uproot my whole fucking life so I could run out here with Ellie and now I have to fucking move again because this lunatic has hyper-focused on me because my mom hates his guts now and he thinks I can somehow replace her or something?!" Danny was clearly distraught and it tore at Jazz's heart to hear her baby brother so upset.
[Don't worry, Danny. You don't have to move, I've been poking around and I've managed to fenagle a deal with someone. Vlad won't be a problem for much longer.] Jazz soothed gently.
"What? A-are you sure? Who did you make a deal with?" Danny asked stumbling a little over the revelation.
[Well, Ghost-X really wants a rare pelt doesn't he? I can help him get one at the low low price of Vlad Masters.] Jazz explained as gently as though she were soothing Danny from a nightmare. Danny's jaw dropped for a moment, his gut twisting and his heart torn.
"Jazz I...Did you sell out Vlad to Skulker?" Danny asked somewhat faintly, as though he was not completely sure he wanted to know.
[I did no such thing. I merely sold some weapons to a family friend. What happens, happens and is entirely Ghost-X's own choice. Vlad Masters is a monster with more money than sense; money will not save him from the consequences of his own malice forever. There is a price to be paid for making enemies everywhere you go.] Jazz comforted gently, she knew that Danny would trust her decision and excuse her faulty reasoning. After all she would have done the same.
Jazz knew that what she was doing was probably wrong, was cruel and a disproportionate punishment for the crimes committed. Yet it only felt fitting for the man constantly hunting and tormenting the person that she loved above all others to be hunted like a common animal by one of his own previous accomplices. Normally she would have never trusted Skulker with the weapons that her parents had designed and she had stolen, but she had been observing him and the others for long enough to realize that all the ghosts hated Vlad more than they were annoyed by Danny's nosy peacekeeping.
"I...I don't know what to do with that Jazz." Danny sighed pinching the bridge of his nose.
[You don't have to do anything Danny. Just relax and let me help you for once. I'll come to see you and Ellie tomorrow, just focus on Ellie and my visit. Has she been adjusting to the situation okay? I'm sure it was very stressful for her to be subjected to not only Vlad but our parents like that. She's two now isn't she?] Jazz steered his attention gently.
"Y-yeah. Yeah. Luckily she doesn't seem to actually remember Vlad at all and her nightmares are so vague I don't think she remembers Jack and Maddie either. But I think she's lost all her other memories as well, she's so smart but she's also really only two." Danny explained, exhausted but doting.
[I know it must be so difficult to raise her on your own, you're still just a child as well after all. But now that Vlad is out of the way it wouldn't be any more dangerous for me to come live with you to help finally. I'll put in a transfer immediately to Gotham University and I'll be able to help you more directly than just sending money and presents.] Jazz sounded happy, her voice becoming more energetic and excited. [Sam and Tucker will be able to get back into contact with you again too! You don't have to do this alone anymore, I know these past six months have been so hard on you. You'll be able to go back to school!]
"Jazz, it wasn't just Vlad I was hiding from; Jack and Maddie are also still a problem." Danny sighed.
[Tch, they won't be much of a problem anymore after Sam, Tucker, and I completely destroyed their lab and all their bigoted research. They'll be rebuilding for decades and if they dare show up we already know how to counter them.] Danny had never heard Jazz speak so coldly about their parents before, but then their parents had never tried to vivisect Danielle and destroy Danny before.
"...That still leaves the GIW though..." Danny protested somewhat weakly.
[Technus and Tucker have teamed up to completely destroy all their bases and basically cause them to hemorrhage money with no results to speak of. They'll be shut down soon enough.] Jazz sniffed, she didn't even view them as a legitimate threat. [More importantly, when I finally get there we'll get everything in order. You'll go to school and we'll work together to build a better life.]
"Oh, I dunno about school. I do still have to work, I can't just rely on Sam to send me living expenses every month. I feel like dead weight and her parents will have to notice eventually." Danny reasoned.
[It's okay Danny, we can take turns working and going to school. I'm sure we can figure out a balance between taking care of Ellie, school, and working.] Jazz reasoned gently.
"Jazz, that's way too many things all at once. I don't want to leave Ellie alone for too long and even though the Batburger lets me bring her with me to work I doubt that high school is just going to let me bring my two year old daughter with me." Danny reasoned.
[Well, haven't you been repairing things for people on the side? What if I get a job so that you can focus on working from home by building some of your actual inventions instead of just repairing things for people. I'm sure you could make some real money with that portable shield you made. Doesn't Wayne Enterprise provide scholarships for engineering? I really think you could accomplish so much if you just take the chance.] Jazz reasoned.
"I dunno Jazz, I was a C average student and technically dropped out to raise my daughter, I don't think they'd let me have a scholarship or work for them or whatever." Danny refuted.
[If they have any sense they'll realize that choosing your daughter over your education was respectable and they'll know that grades are not a true indication of intelligence. Besides, I would say you did very well given how stressful everything had been for you since the accident, especially with Vlad exasperating the situation by sending people to constantly attack you in some twisted effort to wear you down and make you more pliable to his sick advances.] Jazz spoke of Vlad with the utmost disdain.
"Pfft, sending people to constantly attack and harass me at all hours so that I'd eventually have to seek him out was not among the worst things Vlad ever did to me." Danny huffed with a dark sense of amusement.
[No, but it was still a wretched thing to do and I would take his pelt myself if I could.] Jazz said more coldly than Danny had ever heard. It surprised him a little, though he should have realized how deeply Jazz actually loathed Vlad.
"It'll be fine Jazz. We'll make due...you're coming to live with us and we'll build a better family than the one Jack and Maddie built for us. Thanks for talking with me Sis...I love you." Danny sighed completely drained from everything that happened and the conversation on top.
[Always Little Brother. I love you so much, I'll see you tomorrow.] Jazz spoke warmly, as loving as she had always been towards him.
<><><><><>
Normally Timothy Drake made an effort not to spy on his neighbors. But he was nosy by nature and his neighbor was a teen dad only a year older than his youngest brother Damian Wayne. It was hard not to focus a little more on the sixteen year old Danny Winters, especially since he was always so exhausted. Tim could admit that it probably wasn't his business what led to a sixteen year old living alone in Gotham with a two year old daughter but Tim could never leave a mystery unsolved.
It took him a solid week to find the teen's true identity which was not only concerning but frustrating, especially since he had to bring in Babs to help crack his security open. Someone with massive technical skills was protect him and it only made Tim infinitely more curious. The mystery only deepened when they found that Danny came from some nowhere town that wasn't even on any proper map.
They managed to figure out that he was actually Danny Fenton and after a falling out with his parents he had run away with his baby and had been moving town's fairly frequently until he finally ended up in Gotham. There were inconsistencies and unusual blank spots in his history and travel trail. However, it rapidly became obvious why when the realized that one Vlad Masters was also constantly trailing after him. They could not figure out the connection between them but it was very concerning.
The answers came far too long later, Danny had been living in Gotham for months before an unusually loud and distressed conversation next door grabbed Tim's attention. Tim was only able to hear Danny's side of the conversation given how thin the walls were but it was as enlightening as it was distressing. Tim was not completely sure what was going on but it seemed that Danny's sister had sold out Vlad to someone and was going to move in with Danny.
Tim was not sure what was going on, but Danny was a very sweet and helpful boy. His daughter was adorable and Tim was distressed for them both that some rich old bastard was so viciously focused on them. It made him sick to think about the implications of what he heard and if Tim saw Masters himself he was not sure how he would keep himself from killing the man. He was torn between telling Bruce and telling Jason. Bruce would surely try to get him arrested and reformed or whatever but sometimes...sometimes someone deserved to be sold out to Red Hood.
Danny was just a kid and he'd already been forced into parenthood and far too much trauma and stress. Yeah, the longer Tim stewed over it the more certain he was that this particular case should go to Red Hood. He would make his own call soon; Danny deserved better than whatever shitshow Masters forced him and his daughter into.
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It pleased Jazz more than words could say that she was proven right only a week later and Vlad Masters had become Skulker's most prized taxidermy piece in his cabin. Ember thought it was tacky but justified.
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palletical · 4 months
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The fellas!!
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groven4 · 5 months
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"I don't ship securitywaiter" I say as I continue to fall deeper and deeper down the "crackship" rabbit hole.
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captainkirkk · 1 month
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Favourite relationship trope (romantic or platonic):
Clingy Character A who has always been told they love too intensely and overtly & Character who doesn't know what it is to be loved unconditionally, surprised and awed and overjoyed at being loved so shamelessly so Character B
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duck-speak · 10 months
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wip of four different kinds of unhinged 😳
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nevertheless-moving · 2 months
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unable to stop dwelling on the discworld trouser leg of time where, in the penultimate fight scene in Nightwatch, Carcer manages to kill teenage Sam Vimes.
Which means that the future that Duke Vimes came from can no longer exist, which means he can’t go home. Meanwhile you’ve got a bunch of history monks with stored up temporal energy, a prepared space outside of time, and the need to do some desperate damage control before the Auditors get involved. Death shows up, reality is unweaving, Sam is reading Carcer his discworld miranda rights because what else is he supposed to do.
and finally, with little other option, the monks de-age Sam so he fits the time period and send him back out into the fray.
(they didn't call it deageing of course. His memory is hazy, splintered during that terrible in between moment, They....took the time out of him? Sanded away the edges of his self for a terrible, workable fit? It...wasn't a good feeling.)
Just—damn. Sam Vimes having to live his whole crapsack life over again, but this time as his disillusioned-reillusioned, unwillingly-character-developed, noir-epic, Duke of Ankh, Commander Sir Samuel Vimes self. 
Younger (Older? He's never felt so Old, His steps so Childlike, reality twisting in his gut like one of Dibbler's pies) Sam Vimes walking around in a haze after the revolution. Desperate to go home, knowing he can’t. Wanting to drink. Knowing he can’t.
The whole precinct feels pity, he really took Keel’s death hard, hardly speaks except to do his job. Eventually he has to grit his teeth and start being present, because what else is there to do?
Resists the urge to drink until Colon takes the whole watch out to celebrate because -he’s going to be a father!
Come on Sammy, one drink won’t kill you— and after the first drink he’s cracking jokes and after the second hes smiling and after the third hes honestly the life of the party and sometime after that he’s crying about how he was going to be a father and my wife would be ashamed if she saw me drinking like this and— 
Oh shit, Did anyone else know he had a wife?? A PREGNANT wife??? What—aren’t you like 12—no you're 17 now aren't you but when did—
You guys n’ver met ’er—oh gods none if you ev’n know ‘er, is jus’ me...
What—when did you lose—
I lost her the same damn day I los’ ev’rythin else, whadya think...bleeding Carcer...the fuckin revolution...
So! That! Sam only vaguely remembers the night, but rumors travel faster than light on the disc, so by the next day the whole damn city knows about poor Sam brung low by the loss of his poor, tragic, pregnant wife, so young to be a widower, and the Seamstresses nod because they already knew, don’t ask them how, somethings you just have to know in that trade.
And his mother—I don’t know, sue me, I’m a time travel fiend but there’s something deeply intriguing about a man meeting his dead parent, who is somewhat younger than him, and stepping into the old relationship like a badly fitting thing that's supposed to fit well. She would know, right? How would she deal with her son’s impossible grief? Maybe she wouldn’t know—he spent most of the time out of the house, running with different street gangs, maybe he avoids her until she dies and lives with the guilt twice over. God, we don’t even know her name. There’s just so much narrative and emotional potential that I don’t even know where to start.
When he’s on duty, which is most time - it’s agonizing because at first he remembers cases, saves lives that would have been lost. But the more time passes, the hazier his memory because in the original timeline he was becoming an alcoholic. Fuck! A kid dies and he could have saved her if he hadn’t been such a drunk, if he had just remembered where the asshole lived, but it’s all a haze, and he wants to drown out his guilt, but that’s what caused this in the first place.
Good young Sammy, who spends his rare off-time in dusty libraries (and yes, the irony that he’s apparently Carrot now is not lost on him) reading gods-only-know.
It’s not like he can ask the wizards for help, cutthroat and vicious as they are now in the not-so-distant-past.
Good young Sam, who...talks to the Broken Drum’s pet Bouncer like he’s a real person and not a dumb rock? That’s a bit weird, but he’s a bit of a funny guy.
Good old Sam, who believed the testimony of the dwarf who said the humans were trying to rob him and let the dwarf go??
the PROBLEMS this man would cause, good grief. Can you imagine a moderately progressive middle aged man with some degree of begrudging diversity and equity training that he did, for all his sins, pay attention to, suddenly going back to like, 1990, going back just 30 years, and going...oh damn this is kind of fucked up, no man you can’t say that, holy shit.
Except Sam’s lived through even more rapidly shifting social moroes! There’s no seamstress guild, there’s no women allowed inside the university, there’s no black ribboner’s society. People hunted trolls for their teeth! But Sam can’t just unlearn everything, and he can’t shut up, and he has no real luck and anyway he would absolutely get himself (temporarily) fired.
FUCK. Sam has no idea what to do with that. None. Zero clue. Wanders around in a haze until that dwarf he saved from police brutality finds him and insists on repaying the debt. No, he insists, do you have any idea what debt means to a dwarf?
“Sort-of?” he replies hesitantly, and that honest admission of incomplete knowledge shows a hell of a lot more respect and understanding than any self proclaimed dwarf-expert ever did.
Gets a job as a surface man, hauling rocks into the city. It’s backbreaking work, but, in true Discworld fashion, it’s also one hell of a workout (again the irony of being Carrot is not lost him. he freezes for a minute while hauling a rock cart, when he remembers he's technically Lost Nobility too, in a strict sense, but someone curses at him in the street and he's comfortingly grounded)
And here is where this au slides into a SPECTACULAR romantic comedy, BEAR WITH ME. Because in his time on the Watch he’s already done noir, action adventure, war story, detective who dunnit, psychological horror, but guards guards only allowed him to be a romance protagonist in an extremely limited context.
Give me righteous, twenty-something-looking, can’t-say-he-doesn’t-have-style, young Sam Vimes, not an alcoholic,  being fed three square meals a day by his dwarven forced found family, hauling rocks. He is startled to find him bumping his head on a low hanging bar that he doesn’t think used to be there, eventually realizing that he’s an inch or two taller than he remembers. Huh. Guess all that bearhuggers really did stunt his growth.
Still doesn’t get what some of the looks from women he’s getting are about, sure, he’s dirty but so is everyone else. Fine, he took his shirt off, but it’s hot out, there’s far wrinklier than him hauling heavy loads, get a life. 
Happens to glance in the Ankh one day when it’s particularly slow and shiny and is startled to realize that he might be turning heads for a different reason. Oh. Right, not that he was ever a heartbreaker, but he did alright for himself... when he was a younger and his face hadn’t been broken so many times. Which...it isn't now.
Is mildly disturbed by the revelation.
Especially once things blow over at the precinct and what with high mortality rates, he ends up with getting hired again. The boys are delighted to have him back, nevermind that he’s an odd one, noone is ever quite in your corner like Vimsey, absence makes the heart fonder, no one else works that hard, and he’s not even competition for promotion. All around great guy, we should set him up with somebody and just, no.
It just keeps getting worse! He’s literate! He’s a feminist! He believes abuse victims! He’s got a tragic backstory! He’s unreasonably good in a fistfight! He’s kind to animals! Word gets around that there’s a good man on the watch and he’s just waiting for a good woman to come snap him up. The widower excuse doesn’t hold people off completely, and for some it’s its own sort-of appeal. 
Things REALLY become stressful after he rescues that carriage full of noblewoman.
What’s he supposed to do? Let them get robbed? Or worse? Chasing down and beating up 10 goons is as easy as beating up one, when they’re that stupid, getting separated like that, drunk and distracted, and he knows these streets better than anyone, really it’s nothing. And oh lord he’s Modest too.
I mean, they were genuinely greatful, as genuine as people like that are capable of being, the skill having grown rusty. And then there is something...magnetic about the man. An air of command.
So, soon enough you get Lady Marigold of Marigrave calling on Treckle Road for that gallant young officer who rescued them, she really needs to thank him. And Viscountess Elanor Thitzferal specifically requesting that he guard her at her next soiree. And Baroness Julieta van Shoeholten insisting that he come to her home while her husband’s away, for... manly protection.
Aaaah just zero sympathy from the guys. None. 'It’s become a competition, they’re just trying to see who can get me into bed first, it’s like I’m a piece of meat, you can’t send me sir, the Marquess greeted me in a nightee last time you made me go to—' and 'small gods Vimes are you even listening to yourself, shut the hell up'.
Simultaneous to this, (again this is several years into the timeline) swamp dragon accessories come into style. Which means abandoned swamp dragons scrounging on the street. Vimes takes one back to his apartment, blows his paycheck on dragon medicine, and eventually, heart in his chest, brings it to the Ramkin estate. The sunshine orphanage doesn’t even exist yet and he’s just standing outside the gates like an idiot, what is he thinking. Turns around, but her carriage is pulling up and—
well. they meet. it's cute. he's never felt so young. he's never felt so old, too old for her, too poor—
and certainly her thoughts linger too long on the awkward, kindly, handsome young commoner, but is it any wonder she doesn't quite connect it to the stern, dangerous, sexy young guard the ladies seem to be in some quiet, cuthroat competition over?
i have this gorgeous, absurd scene in my head in which Vimes is strong armed into standing guard at some high society soiree and one of the pushiest ladies insists he dance with here, or, if he prefers, if he's not confident about his skills, he can dance with her in-private at her home and he’s like [grinding teeth, looking for a way out, seeinf one] “I would be honored to dance with you.”
Steps right into some ultra-complex dance with multiple partner swaps (she never thought he'd pick this one, devilishly intimidating to one not strictly trained, and you barely spend anytime with your first partner).
But he does alright. Better than alright, for a common man, sometimes misstepping but his hands and feet always end up where they need to be. Raises several eyebrows part way into the song because he's throuwing in some slightly scandalous, no innovative, extra lifts and twirls that wouldn't become fashionable for another decade or two. Who even is that guy? Some out of towner? No, no he's in a guards uniform...how very strange.
Gets to Sybll and she's used to embarrassment during these dances, she tries to get out of them when she can... but can't always. Men awkwardly skipping the lifts, or worse, trying and failing. But him — oh it's him, the one who helped little Erold, and looked at her like—like—well like she was someone beautiful. And he's doing it again, and he's strong and there's a quiet moment where she's in the air, they lock eyes, and the rest of the room melts away.
And then the partners change again, the moment ended.
Just...living throught it all again. To the left, a dance he almost knows the steps to, throwing others off balance with erratic moves , honest mistakes, and delibrate stepping on toes. Improvising. Ruining. Improving. Getting far, far too much attention.
Hes almost excited when the first assassains start coming after him. It's like a hobby.
Everyone tells him he should get a hobby.
Interactions with young vetinari...I don't have the energy to write it all down, the slow circling in on each other, both burning with the need to fix the city, save it, their city.
needless to say he ends up fired again, life under real threat after offending some high lord.
Conveniently enough he has an employment opportunity- bodyguard to fucking Vetinari on his 'grand sneer.' The bastard knows vimes isn't what he seems, though sam is pretty sure that he doesnt know the exacts.
Vetinari hypothesis:(the ghost of keel? Keels son, with some hereditary curse? Or a larger spirit of justice possessing a string of unrelated souls? He knows things he shouldn't- mind reader? Fortune teller? Havelock once arranged for a wizard to bump into him on the street, the magical fool gave an odd double look and then muttered something about destiny looping in on itself giving him a headache. Destiny? Lost noble? And hes far too familiar with sybyl, one of the few bearable noblewomen in this city. And his thoughts on guilds, when havelock can trip him into speaking... Most of all, if hes reading him at all correctly (for all the mystery hes not that hard to read, unless thats a very clever cover) then it seems that behind those dark haunted eyes is Respect. Loyalty. For vetinari. What an interesting man. A puzzling asset. An intriguing threat. )
Did I mention the timeline is changing, healing slowly around the place where it was torn? Healing enough around scars to perhaps get some flexibility back, with some painful stretches and...massaging of said scar tissue?
And hes heading to unresting uberwald, a place where a werewolf pack still hunts humans and, truely unrelated but perhaps equally exhausting, an eldritch spirit of vengeance just might be looking to stretch its legs in a hapless vessel?
Opening drabble Vimes Vetinari Meta (Unwell)
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attempt to redesign dragon miku. please be nice
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1010lilfoot · 9 months
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I don't really ship things but in my brain these two are besties with benefits
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