#we split for a little but i just drank the pain away

[an-idyllic-novelist]

100 Milestone Event - raiden taeemon with mitsuri!reader! short story 🍡

Here it is everyone, the milestone event for reaching +100 followers! This is also part two of another milestone on my yandere blog!

The link will be here, so definitely check it out first before reading this one! Special thanks to @deathmetalunicorn1 for helping me with the sections I was struggling to write. Not gonna lie, Raiden’s dialogue is a bit hard lol. So with that being said: sit back, relax and enjoy! :)

warnings: canon divergence of manga, violence, strong language.

The moment Raiden Taeemon witnessed the strength of a Hashira is a memory he would never forget.

In Valhalla, there were many activities to entertain the masses such as gambling or martial arts tournaments, but sumo matches have been providing just the right amount of spectacle and violence far longer than any known sport. Even gods had become sponsors to certain dojos, providing funds for more equipment and so forth. Raiden was content with his lifestyle, fighting against strong opponents, eating good food and followed by having some fun with a few girls depending on how much alcohol he drank that night.

Then sumo wrestlers began disappearing from the dojos, one by one. Their remains would be discovered the following morning, torn asunder and…half-eaten. The sight frightened the customers so much that they didn’t dare go outside unless they were absolutely certain that the matches would not last beyond the first rays of the sun setting across the hazy blue skies. Even the gods had begun to worry, believing there was a serial killer on the loose…if you can call withdrawing their sponsorships an expression of anxiety. The masters of the dojos even began restricting the fighters to a curfew, forbidding anyone from going out into the night lest they face expulsion.

But Raiden was tough. He had been the strongest sumo wrestler of his time. He could take care of himself. If someone wants to come after him, he’ll return the gesture wholeheartedly.

After an evening of drinking, he took his usual stroll back home when he heard someone call out to him. Confused and half inebriated, Raiden looked over his shoulder and saw a shivering, drooling, decrepit old man with a large lump on his head. At first he thought something was wrong with him…but that concern changed to alarm when the man split his body up into four younger versions of himself with fashionable robes, fangs, and possessed weapons. One of them even had wings and talons like an eagle!

One of them opened his mouth and released a loud screech with enough strength to make Raiden’s head spin and catapulted him into a building. As he stumbled to get out of the debris, the one wearing red robes thrusted his wooden staff into the ground, lightning bolts spitting from it. Raiden screamed, white-hot pain pulsing through his body.

“This is supposed to be the strongest one in this district? How lame!”

“Shut up and finish the job, Karaku! We cannot be seen or else they will come! We cannot go back to that place!”

“Come on, it’s been so long since we’ve played with our food~!”

For the first time in his life, Raiden felt fear. He did not know what these guys…this thing was, but he had to get away. He had to get away or he might die again.

“I’ll finish it. Do not worry, human, your death shall be quick and painless.”

Raiden’s eyes widened as the one dressed in blue charged towards him, wielding a halberd with an apathetic expression. Yet before the weapon could put a hole in his chest, it flew out of his bronze hands with a loud ‘crack’.

“Geez, of all the demons that had to be causing trouble in this place, it’s you guys again?!”

The sumo wrestler whipped his head towards the rooftops of the building, seeing a young woman with braided pink-greenish hair and dressed in black, [Eye Color] orbs narrowed and face pouting as she wielded….a whip? Behind her were two other individuals. A kid in a checkered haori…and a little girl with a piece of bamboo in her mouth?

He watched them leap into the air; the kid unsheathed his sword and went straight towards Red, the girl charged at the green-robed one he assumed was Karaku, and the woman targeted the blue one that was right in front of him.

Neither opponent was giving an inch in their fight, and Raiden had to admit that the kid and muzzled girl were doing remarkably well….yet it wasn’t their unusual sword style or hand-to-hand combat techniques that caught his interest. It was the woman who had torn off her opponent’s arm as soon as she flipped him over her shoulder, knocking him into the ground with a loud ‘crack’.

The blue-eyed demon opened his mouth to scream or release an attack like the yellow one, but she swung her whip across his neck, decapitating the bastard.

Wait, where is the yellow one? Hearing a loud screech, Raiden whipped his head up to the nighttime skies and saw the demon's mouth stretching. The wrestler watched in horror as sparks of electrified air were being collected into a whirling sphere. And the target of the attack was none other than the little lady.

Somehow, he’d been able to force his aching body to move from the debris and bolt towards her, pushing the lady as close to the ground as possible without crushing her, using himself as a shield to absorb most of the attack when it came at them.

The last thing he remembered were his ears feeling wet and the woman’s worried face and… she was saying something to him before he lost consciousness.

He didn’t know what it was, but he hoped it’d been a ‘thank you’. It’s not everyday he got to protect a damsel from a demon, even when she could stand on her own ground.

As Raiden slowly came too, feeling the familiar padding of his futon, he groaned deeply, unable to open his eyes. A headache throbbed painfully through his whole head, making him both dizzy and nauseous.

He couldn't remember the last time he had a hangover this bad as he was slowly able to open his eyes, wincing at the light peeking through his window. His other senses slowly came back to him as the throbbing in his head slowly dulled. Raiden shifted and instantly froze, feeling his whole body seemed to be on fire yet so heavy at the same time.

As the minutes ticked by, Raiden was slowly able to sit up, lifting a hand to scratch at the back of his head, but his movements were stiff, almost like he was restricted, looking down to see bandages all over his body. His mind drew a blank, not remembering getting hurt and like a switch was flipped at that word, hurt, what he could recall from the night before came rushing back to him, making him fall back against his futon as his headache returned full force.

Shit…what the hell even happened? All he remembered was having a good time and then the weird old man…

Raiden’s eyes widened. That’s right. The old man turned into four demons! And then there were those kids…and that woman. The woman with hair that looked like sakura mochi and had the strength of a bear.

Head spinning, heart pounding, his mouth stretched into a grin as the memories from last night came back in full force. He had a preference for the larger ladies, but he’s always been flexible~.

Rengoku had told you countless times that if you ever crossed paths with Hantengu in the Bifrost, never confront him alone. He nearly lost his life against the Upper Moon Demon at the Swordsman’s Village if it hadn’t been for Tanjiro, Muichiro, and Nezuko. In all honesty, he thought the demon would no longer exist once his head had been cut off. But he is still there, in the Bifrost, and he escaped through a tear in the barrier.

He tried to consume as many strong humans as possible to regain his strength, though his efforts drew in unnecessary attention and that’s how he got caught. Tanjiro was able to deliver the final blow to the main body, and everything else went well….although no one had anticipated the damage done to the sumo wrestling district.

Oh goodness, what was going to happen? You knew Tengen and Rengoku loved to go there and watch the matches, especially when Raiden Taeemon was participating, but now it’d take weeks to clean up the mess! Gah, you failed on your second official mission as the Love Hashira! One more strike, and the Master’s gonna be so mad he won’t let you be part of the Demon Slayer Corps anymore!!

You sighed heavily, trudging through the streets with a heavy heart as your crow flew high in the skies above. You had completed another shift in the Bifrost, followed by an investigation in regards to another possible demon sighting in the northern areas of Valhalla.

Although everyone had reassured you that no one was seriously injured that fateful night, it still bothered you tremendously. You had offered to donate the money made from selling honeycombs at the farmer’s market towards the reconstruction of the district, but the Master told you not to fret.

You did what you had to do, and minimized the casualties as much as possible. Rengoku has taught his apprentice very well. The compliment still made your face flush with happiness…though, to your embarrassment, not as much as when you brought that handsome fellow back to his dojo. Raiden Taeemon. You rescued Raiden Taeemon from a demon and treated him in his own room!

Oh, you were such an awful woman~!

Feeling your face redden in embarrassment, you slapped your cheeks together. Pull yourself together, [First Name]! There’s no need to reminisce about the past ‘cause it’ll make delicious food go sour in your mouth! And it’s time for lunch anyway, just think about what you’re gonna order and worry about everything else later unless there’s an urgent message from the Master!

Nodding to yourself, you quickened your pace and found a restaurant with the wisteria symbol stamped just beneath the sign. If a Demon Slayer needed a place to stay or to eat, the establishments that carried the Master’s symbol were trustworthy.

You could relax here without worrying about a demon or paying too much out of your pocket, although you secretly snuck in a hefty tip to the staff for working so hard to accommodate your…quirks. Yeah, quirks, let’s go with that!

Smiling brightly at the familiar faces of the employees, you greeted them enthusiastically and wished they had a good shift as you followed one of them towards the back of the restaurant. This place still catered to other customers, so you always reserved a room for yourself to enjoy your meal in privacy.

Being gawked at for having unusual hair or how much you ate on a daily basis brought back unpleasant memories.

You squealed joyfully at the lacquered oval-shaped table, covered with every single item on the menu plus their best-selling herbal tea! You thanked the staff member profusely for their hard work in the kitchen, promising to enjoy the meal to the fullest!

The employee - a kindly older man with four children and one grandchild - smiled serenely, saying it is the least he and his family can do for the people who saved them long ago, in life and death, from demons. If you need anything, just let him or someone else know.

Upon bowing to each other, he left, closing the door behind him. You wasted no time in giving your thanks to this lovely banquet and began eating to your hearts’ desire. But an hour later, however, a knock came at the door. It was the old man again, but he sounded…worried.

You blinked. Huh? You didn’t remember asking for thirds! You just did that ten minutes ago! Concerned, you allowed him to enter, immediately inquiring what was wrong, what could you do to help.

He swallowed. “That is….there is a man who insists on asking about the ‘cute little lady with hair like sakura mochi’. I told him I knew whom he was speaking about, but politely asked him to leave because you were not to be disturbed. But he is insistent on…sharing this room with you for lunch. What should I do, Lady Hashira?”

You frowned. It wasn’t too unusual to have some rowdy customers walk through these doors, but not to this extent. Perhaps…the person who is giving the owner such a difficult time is because the man has some information he would like to relay to the Demon Slayer Corps? It would make more sense to go directly to a Hashira than pass a message to a kakushi.

You nodded your head to the owner.

“It’s all right, let him come in. Whatever he wants to eat, please add it to my bill.”

The owner’s silver brows pinched beneath his hairline as he frowned. “As you wish, Lady Hashira.” He bowed and quickly left the room, closing the sliding paper door behind him.

Humming softly to yourself, you sat yourself back down in your seat. Some of the employees appeared from behind, quickly and quietly removing the empty plates and rushing back to the kitchens.You thanked each of them for your hard work, smiling softly as you began pouring tea into two earth-brown ceramic cups.

One for yourself, and one for your guest. In your humble opinion, there is no better beverage to have mid-meal than freshly brewed green tea.

Just as you finished pouring the tea into the second cup, the door opened again.

When you looked up to thank the owner for complying with your request, blood drained from your face and your heart somersaulted in your throat. Standing behind the quaking owner was a tall, broad-shouldered man dressed in a dark blue yukata and wooden sandals. White highlights stuck out of his dark brown hair, which was tied back in a ponytail. And he was grinning.

This is Raiden. Raiden Taeemon, the man you had saved from Hantengu and patched up his wounds like the lascivious criminal you were. Oh no, did he figure out what you’d done? Wait, did he even remember that night?! His breath smelled strongly of rice wine when you carried him back to his dojo! You thought for certain that he’d been too intoxicated to realize what happened!

“Hey, there.” He purred softly.

You swallowed. “H-Hello.” You said. “I hear that you wished to speak to me. May I inquire why?” You tried to keep your voice neutral and calm so as to not show that you were nervous. Your palms began to sweat as he took a seat at the table. Raiden beamed, his smile revealing rows of razor-sharp teeth.

“I wanted to thank you!”

But you did not hear him. You were still under the assumption he was angry as you quickly backed away from the sumo wrestler, your forehead and hands resting firmly on the wooden floor in the position of the dogeza.

“I’m so sorry!” You blubbered. “I’m sorry you got hurt! I wasn’t strong enough to handle the demon on my own and you got hurt trying to protect me!! And there was so much damage to the b-buildings! What if you can’t have matches?! What have I done?! I’ll pay for all the damages somehow, I swear it in my honor as the Love Hashira of the Demon Slayer Corps!”

“W-Wait a sec, little lady -”

“But to make it even worse, I entered your home without your permission, and I even touched your body so I could patch you up! Oh, I should have done more! What was I even thinking about being a capable Hashira when Rengoku recommended me to the Master to take up the mantle! Now all the good vibes from lunch are gone!!”

You squeaked as you were suddenly lifted up from the ground, your face being gently cradled by calloused palms and being pulled towards Raiden’s face, chapped lips being pressed against your mouth. Raiden Taeemon was kissing you.

Heat immediately flooded into your cheeks yet you did not dare move, just staring at this man in disbelief. When he pulled away, he smiled at you, tilting his head to the side. “You okay now?”

Your immediate response had been knocking him back into an adjacent wall and turning away to hide your smiling, flushed face. To think you had your first kiss with a strong, handsome man! He did surprise you with a warm laugh, standing up and brushing the dust off of his yukata.

“Sorry about that! You were rambling and that was the only thing I could think of to calm you down!”

When you informed that he was in fact the first person to kiss you like that, he looked at you, completely stunned at your confession before grinning.

“You’re pulling my leg! There ain’t no way a woman as stunning as you hasn’t been kissed before!”

But you remained silent, unable to form any more words beyond the truth. You were never a very good liar. He then surprised you when he lowered his head to the floor, profusely apologizing for putting you in such an embarrassing position.

You quickly forgave him, saying that he did not know in the first place, and in fairness, you had believed that you would not see each other again after that fateful night. You did, however, emphasize that he did have to take responsibility for his actions.

He laughed warmly, jabbing his thumb against his chest. “I’ll do just that then! I’ll marry ya, if you’re willing to be with someone like me!”

You beamed. “Better yet, how about we have lunch together while we’re here? I did say that whatever my ‘guest’ would like to have would be paid by me! And the food here is absolutely delicious! You simply must try their spicy dishes and sweets, if you have a sweet tooth!”

The rest of the afternoon had been lovely, sharing dishes and sharing stories about each other. Not wanting to repeat your parents’ mistakes, you were upfront with Raiden about being a Hashira…as well as being the eldest daughter of the ocean god Poseidon. There were going to be risks if the two of you moved forward….including the possibility that you might not come back from a mission, or even a routine patrol in the Bifrost might get awry.

But to your surprise, Raiden wanted this. He wanted you, a woman who had once been told by a former suitor that only a wild animal could love someone with odd-colored hair and a big appetite.

He did not care if you were a human or a god; what mattered to him, more than strength and beauty, was honesty and kindness.

And you could not be any happier.

Bonus Content:

The last thread of Hades’ patience snapped when his little brother demanded to have [First Name] removed from the Demon Slayer Corps in his palace, after he’d just told Poseidon that she was doing well under Ubuyashiki’s watchful eye.

When he heard about his niece's promotion, Hades was obligated to tell Poseidon the truth about her whereabouts. Obviously he was not taking it very well.

However, Hades will not tolerate being disrespected in his own domain.

The lord of the underworld glared at the tyrant of the oceans. “She may be your daughter, but she is still the Love Hashira of the Demon Slayer Corps. You know damned well I cannot replace skilled soldiers at the flick of a wrist. It doesn’t work like that for this organization. I’m sorry, Poseidon…but you brought this outcome upon yourself. If [First Name] wishes to see you or talk to you, she will do so on her own terms. Do not push yourself into her life again, you’ll only make things worse.”

Hades admired his brother’s kingly qualities, he truly did…but when it came to matters about his eldest daughter, Poseidon was extremely overprotective of her. He could be…irrational.

It was a good thing he’d concealed the wedding invitation moments before Poseidon came here. The god of perfection would never allow his child to marry a human, even if he were the strongest sumo wrestler in history or treated [First Name] just as Hades treated his wife Persephone: with respect, love, and honor.

Poseidon could care less about Amphitrite. Reputation is all that mattered to him; and because he valued that so highly, the price had been paid with his daughter’s ‘disappearance’.

Too little, too late.

Taglist:

@potato-studez-hungryformore

@mallory-a-bond

@hansel-the-pierrot

@bre99-blog

@mortemorii

@myrisan-melodies

@nooneknows8976

@puffy-bangs

@onecantsimply

@nunezs-stuff

@praisethesuuun

@thatstrangesheep

@zodiacs-web

@the-dumber-scaramouche

@themoonisrising

Honorable mentions:

@deathmetalunicorn1

#shuumatsu no valkyrie #an idyllic novelist #record of ragnarok #ror x reader #snv x reader #fem reader #mitsuri!reader #snv #ror raiden #snv raiden #ror x you #snv x you #milestone event #raiden tameemon #raiden tameemon x reader

[harryistheonlyoneforme]

You Pop When We Get Intimate*

pairing: werewolf harry x reader

warnings: abo dynamics, smut, dirty talk

~

YN lets out a pained cough as she breathes in the hot, sticky atmosphere of the crowded living room that her and her boyfriend have just entered. The smell of weed and alcohol hits the back of her throat with the first inhale the second her foot crosses the threshold. She can feel her boyfriend’s warm hand on her waist as he keeps her close to him, guiding the two of them through the disarray of bodies that fill the decently sized room. Looking around, YN can see all heads turn to eye them for a split second before the ending away, whispering to the people around them. Soon enough, the house is quiet save for the sound of “Get Into It (Yuh)” by Doja Cat.

A slight grimace decorates her face, and a dimpled smile adorns his as they get deeper into the house. Harry used to this atmosphere, and YN is the exact opposite. She never went to parties unless it was for family, and the only time she drank is when she was alone or with just her and Harry. The pair makes their way over to the couch that is overflowing with bodies, some people on the cushions and others resting on the back. With one look at Harry, they get the message loud and clear just from the look in his eyes. Instantly, group dissipates to give the couple room to sit comfortably. YN is both equally impressed and scared, wondering what Harry did to gain the kind of reputation he has with his pack members. With just a single look, Harry managed to assert his dominance, no words spoken.

Harry gives all of them one last intense stare before he turns to YN and gives her a bright, dimpled smile, motioning to the now empty couch for her to take a seat. She smiles in thanks and sits down, placing her handbag on her lap as he sits as well, throwing his arm onto the back of the couch, resting behind her head. The two sit there for a while as various people come by and say hello, introducing themselves to YN and greeting their pack leader, making sure they don’t get to close to his lover. Harry doesn’t take his eyes off of any of them, watching each individual like a hawk. A deep growl is bubbling in his chest when -, one of the inferior alphas in the pack, gets a bit too close to her, a threatening glint in his eyes as he broadens his shoulders and prepares to attack. Luckily, the man steps away in fear, and YN takes the opportunity to rub at Harry’s hand, calming him down.

The defensive man finally relaxes into the couch at her touch, a sigh leaving his soft lips. The two sit and relax there, watching the party happen and having their own little conversations. About ten minutes in, one of Harry’s men ends up bringing them two red solo cups filled with clear alcohol, and Harry uses his strong nose to sniff it despite his trust for the other man. When he smells nothing but alcohol in their cups, he passes one to YN for her to sip on as they continue to talk. Sometime when they were talking, Harry had placed his free, ringed hand on YN’s thigh without her noticing, and it was gradually going further and further under her skirt throughout the conversation. YN only notices his intent when he reaches her inner thigh, very close to her vagina. She relaxes into the couch as she realizes that Harry is falling right into her trap.

“Where the fuck are your panties?” he grits out, directly next to her ear as he darts his eyes up to her face. He immediately takes in the smug smile on her face, realizing her plan all along. “Oh, I see. You want t’get punished tonight, hm?” he whispers against the shell of her ear before biting down gently, continuing. “I don’t think you’d like my punishments tonight,” he finishes, satisfied with the way her body tenses up at the plural term. The party is awfully quiet, each wolf straining their ears to hear what the couple is speaking about. Some faces are red, eyes on their shoes, while others are listening shamelessly, stopping their actions to hear.

“Do you know who you’re fucking with? Or should I remind you? Think m’gonna. Right here in front of everyone,” he spits, trailing his right hand up her thigh once more. A smirk forms on his face as he sees her right hand that is holding her beverage start to shake slightly, nerves entering her body at his words. “Spread y’legs a bit” he murmurs, and she does so immediately, giving him access to her wet center.

His fingers instantly take purchase on her throbbing clit, a small mewl leaving her parted lips as he rubs directly over the head. Warm Wetness is dripping from her vagina and into her skirt, her hips bucking up into his hand. The second he picks up speed, she moans under her breath, the feeling making her entire body tingle. He keeps his fingers on her clit, not stopping his ministrations as her orgasm builds rather quickly. Just as she gets close to the edge, her legs shaking slightly around his hand, he pulls his fingers away and laughs darkly as he hears her cry out in frustration before turning and burying her face into his shoulder.

The two of them know that every single person in the room can smell her arousal, but are trying their hardest to ignore it. They all know that if they even look at YN the wrong way, Harry won’t hesitate to end their lives. The rest of the partygoers continue dancing to the music awkwardly, talking and drinking as they try their hardest to ignore the situation happening in the dead center of the party. Tears are welling in her eyes in frustration, her orgasm quickly fading away. Harry, not being able to let her be, decides to tease her a bit.

“Need me to fuck you, hm? Just say the word and I’ll end this party right now so I can fuck you real good. How does that sound, Puppy?” he asks, stroking up and down her thigh with his wet hand. Despite the fact that it isn’t his home, he obviously has the power to end it just for her, and that has her cunt clenching around nothing as she nods furiously into his shoulder.

“Yeah?” he coos, a condescending undertone to his words. YN nods against his shoulder with a whimper, making him smile in victory. She pulls away for just a moment to speak into his ear, her voice desperate and breathy. “Please, Alpha. Need it so bad,” she whines, burying her face into his shoulder once more. He chuckles at her desperation, his cock leaking even more at the compelling smell of her thick arousal in the air. It makes the small room feel even more compact, and he’s instantly growling out his command for everyone to leave, every single alpha, beta, and omega leaving the house in a hurry, wanting their lives to be spared.

Once the room is empty save for the two of them, Harry lifts her skirt and pulls her over to straddle his thigh, pressing her bare cunt against the thick muscle. She gasps as she feels the rough material of his pants against her clit. He barely gives her time to adjust before he’s placing both hands on her hips, helping to move her sopping cunt along his thigh. She nearly falls over at the feeling in her sensitive clit, a broken moan leaving her lips.

“Feel good, baby?” he coos, YN nodding quickly as he works her along him. “Soaking my pants, honey. So fucking wet for me, hm?” he teases, and she doesn’t even have the energy to make a rebuttal, letting him help her cum. Moans are leaving her lips as another orgasm builds, and she can only let it happen, hoping he’ll let her cum this time.

“Gonna cum,” she whispers, her breath catching in her throat as he cunt literally quivers against his thigh, and he’s immediately holding her onto him firmly, stopping her movements. She’s instantly tearing up again, falling into his chest and babbling wordlessly as her orgasm fades away once more. Harry removes a hand from her hip and places it onto her back, rubbing up and down gently as he knows he’s being really mean.

“What do you need, baby?” he asks her, hearing her whine. “Use y’words, Puppy. Can’t understand what you need when you’re all dumb for me. Haven’t even given you m’cock yet and you can’t even use your words. Do I really have that effect on you?” he teases, watching her get all shy and embarrassed. “No need to be ashamed, Lovie. Just tell me what y’need, pup,” he tuts, grabbing her chin gently to coax her into making eye contact with him.

“Need you deep inside me, please. Need to feel you, for you to make me cum. I’ll be such a good girl for you I swear,” she whines, nuzzling into his grip. He hums in satisfaction, looking into her glossy eyes, sensing how bad she needs it. He needs it too, so he decides to put the both of them out of their misery.

“Alright, baby. Ass up” he says, landing one last smack on her sore ass cheek to get her going. She’s instantaneously scrambling to prop up onto the back of the couch, Harry kneels in order to slide behind her. “Ready for me?” he asks, gripping the base of his thick cock, preparing her for him.

She nods and lets out a whimper as she feels his weepy tip swipe through her swollen folds, mewling for him to get into her. He decides to end her suffering, sliding in her tight opening inch by inch, her walls stretching to accommodate him. The both of them groan out into the thick air of the room, and a slight squelching can be heard as he slides into her, bottoming out. Her eyes flutter closed as she feels every vein on his cock against her velvety walls, the slight sting of him stretching her out making her whimper.

Harry stays that way for a while, his hips flush to hers as he relishes in the feeling of her warm, wet walls around his shaft. She feels so fucking good he doesn’t know how long he’ll last before he’s exploding into her. The second he feels like he won’t explode with one thrust, he pulls out until his tip is resting at her entrance before pushing all the way back into her, sliding against her g-spot. She’s moaning into the arm of the couch, tears building in her eyes as she takes in every ounce of pleasure he’s giving her.

“How’s it feeling, Puppy?” he asks over her whines, a smile on his face when she physically can’t answer. “Is that deep enough for you? Feel me deep in y’tummy?” he coos, his cock twitching when she nods and presses her ass against his hips. “So fucking good around me, baby” he moans, still fucking her slow and deep.

He pulls out once more before slamming into her harder, a surprised yelp leaving her lips at the change. “Fuck!” she exclaims against the fabric, her hands fisting the cushions. She’s nearly ripping the cushions with her nails, gripping onto them tightly as he drills into her perfectly. Harry is literally so deep inside her, filling her to the brim as he stuffs every inch of his cock inside with each thrust. She’s so full of him she can barely breathe, gasping for air with each and every plunge. He can feel her starting to clench already, her past orgasms coming back at full speed.

“Y’gonna cum, m’love? Hm? Gonna soak m’cock before I let you rest?” he pants, rubbing up and down her back as her entire body locks up, her orgasm moments away. She nods into the cushions once more, biting down on the fabric as she holds back until she has permission. “Okay, Puppy. Cum for me, cum for your alpha like a good little pup” he coos, and no more than five seconds later, she’s cumming all over his cock with a shout, a thick layer of cream covering the base of him.

He doesn’t stop fucking her, riding out her orgasm. With each thrust, he feels more and more of her cream coat him, leaving his lower belly sticky with her orgasm. He fucks her until her body goes limp against the couch before pulling out slowly and making his way around to where her head is, her body twitching with the aftershocks. He rubs a hand over her head, watching her relax into it.

“Can you go again or should I just clean y’up?” he rasps, despite his throbbing cock still needing stimulation. She says nothing, propping herself up and leaning forward to take his cock into her mouth, suckling on the angry head of it. A groan is bubbling from deep in his chest and he’s trying to refrain from bucking into her mouth. He’s instantly sent over the edge when YN takes all of him into her mouth and down into her throat, his head thrown back and his mouth dropped open in a silent scream. She sucks him dry, cleaning every last drop of cum from his cock as his legs shake in overstimulation.

Whining, he pulls away from her and makes eye contact. “You didn’t have to do that, baby” he pants. “Was just gonna clean you up” he says, rubbing over her head gently. She just shakes her head, a yawn leaving her lips.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever, I know. Just get over here and cuddle me. M’tired,” she whispers, reaching up to pull him toward her. He chuckles at his perfect girlfriend, lying down on the couch before flattening her onto him, wrapping his arms around her. The two fall asleep within a few minutes, right there in the center of the room.

~

#harry styles fic #harry styles fic rec #harry styles smut #harryistheonlyoneforme #smut #harry styles filth #dbf harry styles #harry styles #harry related writings #werewolfrry #werewolf harry #werewolf harry styles #werewolfrry smut #werewolf harry smut #wolfrry #wolfrry smut #oh-so far from home #oh-sofarfromhome #fic #harry fic

[turtletaubwrites]

Something I Could Have ~ Part 17

Pairings: Zoro x Fem!Reader, Sanji x Fem!Reader, Robin x Fem!Reader, Sanji X Robin

This is part 17 of the Series 'We've All Got Needs,' linked below:

Word Count: 3016

We've All Got Needs Masterlist

Ao3 Link (Ch. 7 of We've All Got Needs cont.)

Summary: Zoro's worried about you, and Robin and Sanji have a question for you. You spend time with your friend, and she shares what's been on her mind.

Rating/Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content, AFAB!Reader, She/Her Pronouns for Reader, 18+ Only, MDNI, Reader-Insert, Smut, Lots of Fluff, Angst, Polyamory, Asexuality, Friendship, Relationship Discussions, Pet Names, Alcohol, Biting, Bruises, Masturbation

A/N: I went over board and had to split this into 2 chapters, so there's only some solo smut at the end. Lots of fluff, a little angst, and then tomorrow's chapter will be the smut that everyone (including me!) has been waiting for. I hope you enjoy this chapter! I just love our Straw Hats so much 💜

The smell of the sea and the coos of birds drifted through your mind. You felt stiff, stretching your aching body, then your eyes flew wide. 

A News Coo gull sat perched on the railing of the crow’s nest, staring down at you. You scrambled to cover your bare chest, but couldn’t wrest the blanket from Zoro’s dead weight. 

Your laughter finally woke him, and he jolted when he saw the bird.

“Fuck, what-”

“I think we drank too much,” you giggled, tossing him the nearly empty flask. He rubbed his eyes, groaning but shooting you a look. 

“I think you drank too much.”

“You’re naked with the news bird too, buddy.”

“I meant to sleep up here, what’s your excuse?”

You launched yourself at his smug face, kissing and tickling as you straddled him. Just the blanket between your naked bodies had you gasping, but Zoro grunted in pain as you accidentally poked his bruised ribs again. It shouldn’t feel so good that I hurt him this much. 

But it did. 

Especially when he grabbed your wrists, and forced them behind your back. Your faces were so close, heavy breaths mixing together. The tension was palpable, and suddenly your roaring thoughts from the night before barreled through you. 

Your breath hitched, brow tensing slightly. Zoro had looked like he was about to eat you for breakfast, but now his eyes narrowed, and he tilted his head at you. 

“What’s wrong, Needy?”

You had to clear your throat before brushing your thoughts, and his question away. 

“The News Coo is still watching.”

Zoro glowered up at it, but it remained unphased. 

“Seriously, in front of the bird?”

Scrambling for the blanket, your skin flushed red at Nami’s voice. She hopped over the railing to pay the bird, avoiding eye contact now as she grabbed the newspaper, and started back down.

“For shame, you two. Filthy perverts.”

Busting out laughing, you couldn’t move. Zoro had to lift you, settling you beside him as he gathered all your clothes. 

Still laughing, you inspected your indented skin from laying on the wooden planks. 

Then you felt a twinge, and examined the bite mark high up on your inner thigh. You could still see the outline of his teeth, the skin tender and purpling already. 

“I need to make more arnica cream,” you muttered to yourself while Zoro pulled his pants on. He knelt beside you, opening your thighs to inspect the bruise.

“Fuck, Needy, I…”

“I love it, Zoro. I love when you mark me.”

Gripping his hand, you pulled it toward you, kissing his knuckles softly. 

Zoro breathed in deep as his eyes fell closed.

“You’re really something, Needy.”

~

Zoro’s whispered praise circled your mind down through the ship, and into the showers. Luckily it was early enough that the walk of shame only hit Nami, and the scrumptious Robin who let you join her in the bathing room. 

“How was your date,” you asked after a quick kiss, fighting your growing headache. 

“It was lovely. Though maybe not as fun as yours was,” she teased, gesturing down to the bite mark. 

Your skin flushed but not for the bruise. For the almost words. 

“It was a good night.”

~ 

“How are the two most gorgeous women in the world?”

Sanji kissed your cheek, then Robin’s as you each sat at the edge of the table. 

“Hey!”

“How could I forget the stunning Nami-swan?! Can I get you anything else to drink, my dear? Another waffle?”

“Can I have another waffle, Sanji?”

“No, Luffy, you’ve eaten most of them already!”

When Sanji’s back was turned, you handed one over, your captain’s grin warming you down to your toes.

Zoro squeezed his arm around you, and you sighed against him.

I have the best fucking life.

The after breakfast check in started quiet, with you and Zoro sitting across from Sanji and Robin. Sipping your coffee, you grinned at Sanji, who’d only called you ‘angel’ about 20 times during breakfast.

You spoke up, getting things going.

“How’s everyone doing? Anything we should talk about or share?”

Zoro grunted as you squeezed his hand, but said nothing. You tried not to roll your eyes at the thought that he might never bring something up during these group check ins. 

Sanji nodded toward Robin, whose smile grew. 

“Sanji and I have decided to continue seeing each other.”

You beamed at them, loving the flush burning across Sanji’s face.

“Congrats,” Zoro mumbled, and you leaned against him. 

“I have one more thing I’d like to discuss.”

The table went quiet, and all eyes turned to Robin, her hold on everyone always so strong. Still, you couldn’t help but notice Sanji’s fists shaking on the table as he glanced from her to you. 

“We would like to invite you, Y/N, to join Sanji and I on a date.”

Your heart sped through you, all your desires you’d tried to keep at bay rushing through your mind. Your mouth was dry as you felt Zoro’s hand tense around yours. 

“Are… Are you comfortable with that, Zoro?”

Zoro cleared his throat, sitting up straight as all eyes moved to him. 

“I, uh… Yeah, I don’t see why not. You’re already with both of them.”

You looked into his eyes, squeezing his hand. Trusting that he was telling the truth. 

“I would love that.”

Robin’s smile made you shiver, while Sanji looked like he was about to pass out, eyes fluttering a bit. 

“Y/N, would you like to have our date tonight, or would you like a break?”

Oh, you wanted to say tonight. The force of both of their faces turned to you in anticipation almost had you moaning yes. 

But you felt the twinge of Zoro’s bite, and the wrecked state of your slightly hungover body, and you admitted to yourself that you couldn’t keep all of this up everyday. 

“I need to have a break today. Raincheck for tomorrow?”

They both said ‘of course,’ though Sanji’s came out in a near squeak that had you smiling. 

Robin stayed back to sit with Sanji while he ate his breakfast, and Zoro practically dragged you out into the hall. 

“How hurt are you,” he asked in a hoarse voice, eyes scanning you. 

“Zoro, I’m okay. I just need breaks, remember? I don’t have the stamina of someone with a 60,000,000 bounty on his head.”

Zoro kept his scowl, then grabbed your wrist again. 

“I’m taking you to Chopper.”

“No, I’m okay, really, Nami’s waiting for me.”

“Nami can wait,” he said in a near growl. 

There’s no point arguing with him now. 

~

“She needs a check up.”

“Oh, Y/N, are you okay?”

Chopper was already clearing space in his quarters for you to sit while you shook your head at Zoro.

“I’m alright Chopper, Zoro is just worried because I’m tired” 

“Well, a check up never hurts!”

Zoro leaned against the door, refusing to give privacy, and you had to convince Chopper it was okay. You told him you’d drank the night before, and Chopper prescribed plenty of water and rest.

“Thank you so much, doctor.”

“Oh, shut up, don’t think you can make me feel good just by-”

“Chopper, check her leg, she's injured.” 

Glaring at Zoro, you couldn’t persuade Chopper that it was nothing this time. Luckily you’d worn a skirt to avoid aggravating it, so it was easy to show it to him.

Chopper did demand that Zoro look away this time, and you stuck your tongue out at him as he turned.

“Y/N, what kind of animal did this to you? Is it still on the ship?”

You held in your laugh at Chopper’s concern, and Zoro’s clenched fists.

“It’s fine, Chopper. It was Zoro.”

His eyes practically bugged out of his head, and Zoro turned, red-faced. 

You had to explain that Zoro had not turned into some sort of werewolf, and that it was done consensually. Zoro looked like he was going to murder you, but you just raised your brows at him. 

He’s the one who wanted me in here, serves him right.

“Well, Y/N, we only have a little bit of arnica cream left, but here you go. And Sanji should still have some ice in the kitchen storage. Tell him it's doctor's orders for you to ice that wound.”

Chopper’s brief confidence shook as he rounded on Zoro.

“And Zoro, I… P-Please be careful with b-biting. If you break the skin, it can cause an infection.”

Zoro clenched his jaw, but nodded before reaching his hand out to you. 

“Thanks again doctor, you’re the best!”

“Aw, stop it-”

Zoro had pulled you through the door, and slammed it before you could enjoy the rest of Chopper’s shy wiggle dance. 

Zoro pressed you gently against the wall in the hallway, leaning his forehead against yours. Your heart jumped into your throat.

“I’m really okay, Zoro. I promise. I’ll tell you if we ever go too far.”

He nodded against your head, and you cupped his face, tilting to look into his deep, brown eyes. The look of concern in them sent warmth through your chest. 

“You’re really worried about me, aren’t you,” you teased, your voice hushed. 

“Only because you’re so needy.”

Hitting his shoulder, you tried to move around him, but Zoro wouldn’t let you. 

His hands moved to cup your jaw, and grip your waist as his lips pressed against yours, so gently. His tongue teased along your lips, and you opened for him. Your fingers trailed into his hair as you moaned, Zoro’s soft kiss bringing heat to your throat. And those words. 

“There you are! Quit sucking face, you missed our run.”

Zoro’s hands tensed on you at Nami’s intrusion, but you stroked his neck before walking to your friend with a smile.  

“Sorry, doctor's orders.” 

“There’s not a chance in hell that Chopper ordered you to make out with a green headed brute.”

You grinned back as Zoro narrowed his eyes, but you followed Nami out on deck.

“Ha, no. I just need a rest day.” 

“Yeah, yeah.”

Glancing at your friend, you felt a sting of guilt. Your runs were the only time you’d been spending together lately, and you’d just blown her off. 

“Do you want to hang out instead?”

Nami rolled her eyes, but nodded. 

Sitting under the tangerine trees made you smile, the sweet scent of the blooms rolling over you. She propped herself up across from you.

“Why do you look like death?”

“Oh thanks. I believe it’s name is whisky, and I believe it’s your fault.”

“Oh no, don’t blame me for that! I gave it to our resident drunk, you didn’t have to drink it.”

“Don’t you mean sold it?”

Nami tried to fake a sheepish smile, but it quickly turned into an evil grin.

“What can I say, I’ve got marketable skills.”

“Thief.”

“Pervert.”

“Hey, swindler!”

“Bird fucker!”

By then you’d launched at each other, falling into laughter, until you collapsed beside her, feeling drained.

“That looks fucking intense.”

You glanced down at your bruise, fixing your skirt that had hiked up. 

“It was, but in a good way.”

“Does it feel good to you? Pain, I mean?”

Nami had kept her face down, and her voice was softer than her normal teasing. 

“It does, but only in a certain context. And it still hurts too. But I enjoy it.”

“That’s something I never tried. The rest just felt awkward, wrong. Just not for me.”

She met your eyes, watching your slow nods as she shared. 

“Sorry, I guess all of your sexcapades have had me thinking about things lately.”

“Like what?”

Lips pressing together, Nami tilted her head slightly before responding. 

“You’re getting serious with them, right? Not just sex.”

Blushing at the thought of Sanji’s words, and Zoro’s almost words, you nodded. 

“What’s that like?”

“What do you mean?”

She looked away, looking out to the sea as she sighed. 

“The relationship part. Without the sex.”

“Oh, I mean… It’s really different with every person.”

Nami glanced at you, and you couldn’t stop there.

“It’s like… It’s like having the sweetest inside jokes. Like having a good friend, a best friend, but you’re precious to each other, special. Thinking about each other all the time. Caring about them, how they feel. Wanting to hold each other. Making fun of each other,” you laughed, thinking of you and Zoro this morning. 

“It often leads back to sex, but all the other stuff is wonderful too.”

Nami leaned her head back against the wooden railing, taking another deep breath.

“I think I’d like that part.”

It was so soft, you wouldn’t have heard if you hadn’t been so focused on her. 

“What do you mean?”

Nami’s eyes were large when she looked at you, with the faintest edge of tears while she smiled.

“The relationship part. I think I’d like to have all of that, but I never thought I could because it was always tied up with sex.”

You put your hand on hers, but waited for more.

“I’ve only seen real relationships that were just two people loving and fucking each other. I didn’t think there were any other options.”

She chewed her lip, voice gaining strength as she focused on you again.

“Watching you guys, and your fucking chaos, showed me that there might be something else out there. Something I could have.”

Squeezing her hand, you felt shivers over your skin at how much you loved your friend, and how grateful you were that she could share this with you. 

“I’m glad my sex life could be so healing for you.”

“Ew, shut up!”

Grinning at her mock outrage, you kept her hand in yours. 

“So, what are you looking for?”

Shaking her head, Nami stretched, smiling at the sky. 

“I’m not sure yet. But I think I want a relationship. I want to love. But without the sex.”

“Well, I’ll be your wingman then!”

“Ha, no way, you’ll just fuck everyone we meet!”

It was your turn for mock outrage, and you laughed together, drained and leaning against each other until lunch was ready.

Fingers laced in hers, you felt happy tears forming in your eyes, but managed to stop them before she gave you shit for crying. I love her. 

The rest of the day was filled with much needed naps, Sanji sneaking into your room to shower you with kisses and ‘I love you’s, a bit of time reading through your field notes, and meals that made your heart full. 

“Here you are, Angel.”

“Thank you, Sanji.”

The repetition of your secret code was still driving the crew crazy, and you caught Zoro and Nami rolling their eyes at each other. 

After dinner, you took turns kissing and hugging Robin and Sanji, then Zoro walked you to your quarters, still hovering over you like a mama bird. 

You laughed at the thought, and he frowned, waiting for you to explain.

“You’re cute.”

He frowned more.

“Cute how?”

“Cute like ‘I need to go inside, and close the door, otherwise I won't be getting much sleep.”

There was his satisfied smirk. You loved to see him like this, confident in your desire for him. Dangerously close to giving you what you need.

He pulled you to him, breathing along your neck. 

“What if we don’t go inside yet?”

“Mm, doctor’s order’s, babe.”

You reached behind you for the doorknob, but moaned into his mouth at another soft kiss. 

I can’t take anymore softness from him, I’m going to scream.

You’d run your brain in too many circles today to even think about telling him, but your thoughts came rumbling back through as he kissed you like he was savoring you. He bit your lip, but just barely, just enough to speed your pulse, and make you moan against him.

I love you.

Be a big girl, and just say it.

Instead, you staggered back, whispering ‘goodnight,’ as you fought to calm your body. 

You should have slept, but you were too on edge. 

Finally, you caved in to the mess he’d left you in, and let your fingers trail down. That kiss had made you ready. Your body always wanted him, even when it needed a break. You still wanted him now, wanted to run to his quarters. 

The knowledge that he would be ready, that he would throw you down, and use your body in the best possible ways, that knowledge made your back arch as you played with your clit.

You could tell you were sore as you touched yourself. You’d never had more pleasure in your life than since Zoro had first fucked you against the bathroom wall. 

Even the sting of the bruise on your thigh brought you further, the memory of his mouth on you brought small moans to your lips. 

What would he have done to me if I’d said ‘yes’ in the hallway?

Your thoughts came in images, and tingles on your skin at the memories of his touch. 

Zoro slamming your back against the wall, shoving his fingers into you without giving you a chance to breathe.

You sank your fingers into yourself, twisting your body slightly so you could reach that aching spot within you. You curled your fingers, letting your other hand tease lightly on your clit as you lost yourself in thoughts again. 

The way he moves and controls your body, keeping you right where he wants you. Keeping you there so he can shove himself so brutally fast and deep that you see stars. 

You were so close with memories of Zoro, but suddenly the image of Sanji and Robin flooded your mind. Robin’s taunting smile, and Sanji’s tease from two nights ago sent you over the edge.

‘Do you want my tongue or my cock inside you while she rides the other?’

Your body clenched, soft moans leaving your throat that you couldn’t control as your fingers fought to keep going. 

Breathless, you collapsed, achingly tired now. 

But oh so ready for tomorrow night. 

Ready for both of them. 

Thank You for Reading! 💜

TurtleTaub Fanfic Masterlist

Part 18

Tag List: @astheni-a | @ferns-fics | @heilee | @iamn1ya | @ghostfacefricker6969 | @onlybassoon01 | @apothicgloom | @slyhersophia | @cyberaestheticals

A/N: I realized while writing this chapter that it could seem like the beginning of a pregnancy trope. Just know that Zoro was overreacting, and the reader really just needs to rest more. Pregnancy tropes, especially those that come out of nowhere, make me uncomfortable, so don’t expect to see them in any of my regular series. I am open to writing requests for that in blurbs or one shots, but for my main stories, we practice safe sex y’all! Let me know if you’d like to see them react to a pregnancy scare or something in a one shot. Now it’s in my head, lol. But not here! Thank you, and I’m sorry if this made you nervous, I swear there are no babies coming! 😅

Buy me a coffee ☕🙏🏼

#nami #asexual #one piece fanfic #mine #zoro fanfic #Reader Insert #Fem!Reader #poly fanfic #nico robin fanfic #nami one piece #x reader #sanji fanfic #smut #one piece smut #nami fanfic #turtletaub fics

[cest-la-vieve]

A Court of Pain and Pleasure (Ch. 13)

Summary: Evelyn faces the consequences of both her kiss with Azriel and the deal she made to train with him.

Word Count: 7k

Warnings: Chronic disability/pain, cussing, fluff, mentions of violence

Notes: i had a heck of a time writing this. thank you to all my lovely friends who offered to proofread and help me work through some of the kinks. i hope y'all enjoy !

Next Chapter: Chapter Fourteen

ACOPAP Masterlist

---

Dinner was… awkward, to say the least.

Cassian kept sneaking glances between Azriel and me, ranging from confusion to protectiveness to this smug smirk I wanted nothing more than to wipe off his face. 

Then there was Feyre and Lucien, off to the side chatting about… something. I couldn’t focus on listening to their conversation since all of my attention was on avoiding Azriel at all costs.

That kiss changed my life.

I had never experienced anything that had called to my very soul the way that kiss had, as brief as it had been.

The way his lips had slotted against mine, his hands oh-so-gently placed on my hips, and the perfect way our bodies fit together - like two puzzle pieces that had just been waiting to find each other.

All I wanted was to live in that moment forever. Well, actually, maybe not that moment just because I was so, so desperate to see what would have happened in the moments after if it hadn’t been for -

Cassian.

I glared at his back from where I sat on the couch. He was standing with Azriel and Rhysand off to the side, doing their best to ignore Nesta’s arrival. 

I took a long sip from my glass of wine, shaking my head slightly at the strength of it. Maybe if I drank enough I wouldn’t have to worry about the consequences of that kiss.

As if sensing my narrowed gaze, Cassian turned toward me. He took in my sour expression and sent me a wink, causing me to furrow my eyebrows even further. I could only hope he wasn’t planning on continuing his little game of tormenting me with what he had seen.

Of course, his attention was split between torturing me and panting after my sister. The thought alone brought a small smile to my face. Now at least I had something to hold over his head.

I turned my head away from the males and smiled as Mor fussed over Nesta’s dress. My sister would never admit it but I knew she loved the finery - something she missed while we were in that cabin. The Fae took extravagant clothes to a whole new level.

“It’s a good thing we’re not the same size - or else I might be tempted to steal that dress,” I heard Mor say and I giggled into my glass of wine.

Nesta took in the Fae female, looking her up and down, before saying, “Fortunately for you, I don’t return the sentiment.”

I covered my mouth with a hand, stifling the snort of air that escaped my nose, at the same time Azriel coughed into his glass of wine. Our eyes met but I quickly ducked my head, unwilling to see what emotion his face held.

I raised my glass in solidarity as Mor said to Feyre, “I think we’re going to need a lot more wine.”

Cassian quickly stated his intent to raid whatever massive collection Rhys surely had hidden somewhere. I didn’t miss the way Nesta stiffened at his exit and made a mental note to ask her about it the next time we talked. 

When was the last time we talked? When I woke up, I realized with a start. It felt like a lifetime ago. I’d have to make the time to check in with both her and Elain.

I watched Feyre sit next to Nesta at the table, Amren joining them a moment later. Cassian returned with the wine and I beckoned him over.

I vaguely heard Nesta interrogating Amren in the background, but couldn’t find it in myself to care as I finished off the last of the wine in my glass.

Cassian chuckled softly, “Maybe you should take it easy.”

“It’s your fault I’m trying to forget my own name,” I snorted.

He shrugged. “Maybe not my fault,” he teased with a pointed glance towards Azriel, who looked torn between finding out what Cassian and I were talking about and listening to Nesta.

Cassian poured me a bit more wine but stopped as he heard Nesta ask, “And what is beneath?”

I froze as well, knowing it wasn’t wise for my eldest sister to speak so nonchalantly to the most powerful being in this room.

Amren paused before answering, “They never dared ask me that, either.”

“Why.” demanded Nesta.

“Because it is not polite to ask - and they are afraid.”

A staring contest ensued then, one I was not particularly inclined to watch. I took a slow slip of my drink, staring at Azriel over the rim, trying my best to be inconspicuous. Thankfully, his attention was wholly fixated on the exchange between Nesta and Amren. I wondered if he meant to intervene or simply observe.

“We’re the same, you and I. Not in the flesh, not in the thing that prowls beneath our skin and bones… But… I see the kernel, girl,” Amren explained to Nesta, who had gone still enough that she could have been a statue. “You did not fit - the mold that they shoved you into. The path you were born upon and forced to walk. You tried, and yet you did not, could not, fit. And then the path changed. I know - what it is to be that way. I remember it, long ago as it was.”

I took a deep breath. What had she seen in my sister that I hadn’t? Yes, it was definitely time to have a longer conversation with Nesta.

I heard Rhysand intervene to break the tension and stood on unsteady legs to walk towards the table. I watched with wary eyes as everyone took their seats, carefully noting where Azriel and Cassian sat at one end.

Lucien remained standing next to me as well. He glanced to me, questioning his next move, then to Rhys, frowning. “I- shouldn’t you sit at the head?”

A drunken giggle left my mouth at the absurdity of it. Clearly, the male didn’t know the High Lord very well. I ignored the way all the heads in the room snapped towards me at the sound of my laugh as Lucien continued to flounder between the seat at the head and the seat across from Nesta.

“I don’t care where you sit. I only care about eating something right now.” Rhys said, snapping to summon the food to the table.

Lucien remained standing.

“Oh for gods’ sake if you won’t take it, I will,” I finally sighed out, pushing past the green-clad male and stumbling into the seat across from my sister. Nesta sent a disapproving frown my way, clearly not happy with my level of intoxication. I just grinned back at her and took another swig of wine.

My head spun a bit as the smells of the various foods hit my senses. I ignored the way the room seemed to spin a bit and focused on the lack of stress weighing down my shoulders. I flicked my eye to Nesta - to two Nestas.  Maybe I should slow down on the wine.

Lucien finally sat next to me, claiming his spot at the head of the table, as Feyre leaned forward to tell him, “You get used to it- the informality.”

Rhys sent a teasing jab her way before she elaborated, “It took me by surprise that first dinner we all had, just so you know. Honestly, Azriel is the only polite one.”

I stiffened. Next to me, Amren sent a sidelong glance my way. I couldn’t tear my eyes away as Azriel smiled faintly, shyly before taking food for his plate.

“As you wish.”

His appeasing, imploring words came back to me and swirled around my head. Polite, indeed.

Feyre’s voice cut through the haze in my mind as she asked Cassian, “What time are we back in the training ring tomorrow?”

I nearly laughed at the exasperation on my sister’s face as the Illyrian general responded that he wanted her there at 7 in the morning.

Azriel’s quiet but assertive voice found me from the other end of the table. “That means you, too, Evelyn.”

I couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, as I found the shadowsinger leaning forward to make eye contact with me. His face was impressively blank, revealing none of his thoughts as he continued to look at me. He quirked an eyebrow and cleared his throat and I realized he was waiting for a response.

What had he said? What were we talking about?

Oh, yes. Training. Morning.

I groaned and threw my head into my hands. I had forgotten that moments before… it… Azriel had agreed to train me. Which meant I now had to get up early and spend gods knows how long training with the male I had just kissed.

Laughs echoed around the table at my reaction, taking it as my displeasure at having to be awake, but Cassian gave me a knowing smirk. I just glared daggers at him, wishing that the Cauldron had given me the power to skewer someone with my eyes.

I mentally berated myself as the other resumed their teasing, something about Cassian and Azriel wanting ‘prettiness’ to look at, though I doubt Azriel had been a part of that conversation at all.

I snapped my head up as Rhysand confirmed that he sent out invitations to all the High Lords to schedule a meeting to discuss the war.

I stood up, careening to one side as the room seemed to move beneath my feet. Lucien’s cautious hand darted out from his spot at the head of the table next to me to steady me on my feet. Once I wasn’t at risk of falling, I giggled and patted Lucien’s head in thanks, ignoring his bewildered and slightly offended look. The scene had effectively distracted everyone from Rhysand’s declaration. I cleared my throat, “I suppose this means you are going to begin that dreadful politicking of yours, which means it’s time for me to find somewhere else to be. At least until you all decide to discuss something more interesting.”

Feyre narrowed her eyes but Rhys gave me a smile. “How about I come to debrief you of the interesting bits once we finish our ‘dreadful politicking’, dear sister?” he asked.

My chest warmed at the title, realizing my insistence that he was now part of my family had finally settled in. Nesta, however, scoffed quietly and glared at me. Shit. I should have known she wouldn’t approve of that.

“I’ll be waiting, your High Lord-ship,” I curtsied, laughing as my hair fell in my face at the movement. I straightened myself out, smiling wide as I looked at Rhys.

He laughed, waving me off with his hand. I grabbed my glass of wine and made to leave the room. As I passed Cassian, however, a strong arm shot out to bar my way. I let out a noise of protest as my waist slammed into his arm. He just used his other hand to grab the wine from me, “I think that’s plenty, kid.”

I huffed and crossed my arms, but nodded. He retracted his arm and I continued my walk to the doorway, noting the angry swirling of shadows behind Azriel. I couldn’t begin to imagine what had upset him so much.

I sighed, stopping in the kitchen to grab a glass of water, figuring it might help the impending headache of tomorrow morning. I slowly made my way up the stairs, making sure both feet were firm on the step before moving to the next one. I laughed under my breath at each step, my head feeling fuzzy and my feet feeling heavy. I sighed in relief as I made it to the hallway. The glass of water in my hand miraculously hadn’t spilled any on the way up and as I took sips of it I could slowly feel my head clearing.

I paused as I passed Azriel’s bedroom. I glanced between the door and the sounds of conversation coming from downstairs…

I shouldn’t… Really, I absolutely shouldn’t.

The logical part of my brain screamed at me as the drunk part took over, moving my hand to the doorknob of its own volition.

I inhaled deeply as the door opened, taking a step inside. It smelled so much like him that it overwhelmed my senses. That cedar smell reminded me of sitting in the gardens of our estate as a child. The cedar forest had been planted centuries ago and bordered the far edge of our land. I didn’t remember much from those days before our father lost his wealth but I’ll always remember sneaking off to sit on the edge of the woods, listening to the birds, and waiting eagerly to maybe see a deer. 

It smelled like home.

I exhaled in relief and felt the tension leave my body. I realized I hadn’t really taken a second to just breathe since the panic of earlier. So much had happened so quickly and with this High Lords meeting on the horizon, it seemed like they were going to continue to.

I didn’t protest as my drunken fit led me over to the - of course, immaculately made - bed and sat me down on the edge. 

If I had been more focused, perhaps more sober, I would have noticed the shadows that crept through the open door and throughout the room. If I had, it’s likely I would have very quickly made my escape and gone to my own room before the person they reported to returned. 

But I was drunk.

And I reveled in the way the scent wafted in the room and calmed my senses.

So I put down my water and curled up on my side, letting my body and mind relax. I held the pillow close that smelled so strongly of the male that I just couldn’t seem to shake - not that I wanted to.

I fell asleep more peaceful and content than I had ever been in my life.

-

I blinked awake as the sunlight began filtering through the windows. I yawned, stretching my arms and legs before softly groaning as the stiffness of my muscles faded away.

I sat up slowly, wincing at the slight headache in my temples. Right. Wine.

An unfamiliar blanket was now bunched at my waist. I closed my eyes and racked my brain to remember what had happened after I left dinner last night.

I was supposed to go back to my room and wait for Rhys to fill me in. But I didn’t make it to my room. I cracked open my left eye just to confirm my suspicions. Yep, definitely not my room.

Which means… I blushed as I realized Azriel must have found me here once he retired from dinner. Oh, gods and training!

I whipped my head to the window, realizing that I was likely running late.

Pushing aside my embarrassment, I padded my way down the hallway to my room. I dug through the drawers, finding some fitted pants, a loose-fitting shirt, and a binding for my chest that was designed with exercise in mind.

I took off up the stairs to the roof, panting slightly when I finally burst outside.

I was surprised to find just Cassian standing off to the side of the training ring. I caught my breath and straightened. Narrowing my eyes in suspicion, I cautiously approached the Illyrian general.

“Is this a setup?”

He laughed and set down the sword he had been cleaning. I immediately went to grab it but he stepped in front of it before I could. His eyes twinkled in amusement, “What exactly are you planning on doing with that?”

I crossed my arms, speaking slowly, as you would to a child. “It’s a sword. It stabs. I was going to stab you.”

“I’d like to see you try,” I made to step around him and show him just how lethal I could be, but he moved in my way again. “But I’m not your trainer. He is.” He nodded his chin behind me.

My spine straightened. My pulse quickened. The tips of my ears warmed.

I turned slowly.

Azriel stood across the training ring, eyebrows raised in - amusement? Question? I couldn’t tell.

His posture mirrored mine, arms crossed and shoulders square but he held a grace and power that I’m sure mine lacked.

Determined not to let anything phase me, I bounced on the balls of my feet over to him, still keeping a good distance between us. I stood ramrod straight and held up one hand in a mock salute. “Where do we start, Spymaster?”

He hadn’t moved an inch. Feyre had mentioned at some point that the Fae were able to go so still it was preternatural. Clearly, Azriel had used his 500 years to perfect it.

I lowered my arm, relaxed my stance, and tilted my head in question. His eyes tracked every movement but still, he said nothing.

I whirled around to Cassian, asking, “Is this some sort of hazing ritual? Or a test of some sort?”

Cassian just shrugged.

When I turned back to face the shadowsinger, that stillness had gone but his eyes remained distant. Concern punctured my chest just as surely as any blade. “Azriel?”

His gaze focused and he seemed to return to himself. He cleared his throat and uncrossed his arms, offering one hand out to me.

“Is this a setup?” I eyed his hand with suspicion.

“No,” he answered, voice full of mirth at my wariness. “We’re not training here, so we have to fly to where we are training. Considering you still don’t know how to fly…” He finished by gesturing with his outstretched hand.

“Well, where are we going?” I put my hands on my hips.

His teasing edge hardened into exasperation as he sighed, finally dropping his hand. “Evelyn, we’re going to train. And what we’re doing can’t be done here. Especially with them-” His head nodded to Feyre and Cassian, the former must have snuck out here while I was distracted - “taking up the entire roof.”

At that, Cassian glared at Azriel. “Have fun training, you two,” he said oh-so-subtly. 

I flipped him a finger unsuitable for a lady. I grabbed Azriel’s hand in my own and said, “Just get us out of here.”

He smiled and took off into the sky before I could even blink. I could still feel my stomach dropping as his powerful wings beat, pushing us closer to the mystery destination. My eyes were screwed shut and I clung to him so tightly I would have worried about bruising him if he weren’t Fae.

A soft chuckle sounded in my ear.

“Don’t start with me, Az,” I ground out, careful to take breaths so my stomach wouldn’t empty its contents. “Between you and Cassian, it’s a miracle Rhys has lived this long without losing his sanity.”

His arms squeezed me tighter. Ignoring my comment he said quietly, “Open your eyes.”

I shook my head feverishly against his shoulder.

“I won’t land until you do.”

Cad.

“Fine but if I vomit on you I won’t apologize.”

At his silence, I cracked open my right eye, only looking at his face for a second before closing it again.

“There.”

“Eve.”

It was the way he said my name. The reverence it held, as if I weren’t me, a lost, ordinary female, but instead a goddess who he was asking for a miracle. Begging for one.

He wanted me to see this. It was important to him.

So I bit down on that fear that caught in my throat and opened both eyes before my brain had a chance to process it.

If it was possible, I held on to Azriel even tighter, both arms wrapped around his neck, probably cutting off some measure of his airflow. If it bothered him, he didn’t say anything.

I forced my head from his shoulder and gasped at the sight.

Velaris spread underneath us. I could just barely make out the figures of the Fae and faeries below us beginning to set up their various shops for the day or run their morning errands.

It wasn’t the city that enchanted me though - it was what surrounded it. Mountains reached far beyond what I could see from here, some capped with snow and others featuring jagged rocks. Trees covered what the city and mountain did not, making it look like we were flying over a vast green ocean as they rippled in the wind, mimicking waves.

It felt different than any place I had seen before. Even more comfortable and beautiful than the gardens of our estate. 

If it wasn’t for the flying part, I’d want to stay up here forever just to calm my soul and enjoy the view.

“It’s beautiful,” I confessed to Azriel.

He didn’t take his eyes off of it as he responded, “It’s home.”

Home. I repeated the word and savored the way it made me think of my sister and this beautiful place she now lived in. Maybe this could be home.

I closed my eyes again as Azriel began descending, deciding maybe it would make me feel less queasy if I couldn’t see what was going on. I’m sure the wine last night hadn’t done me any favors in terms of nausea today.

I cracked one eye open as I felt us slowing down.

We landed in a river. Seriously. Azriel landed in the middle of a river.

I shrieked and used only the strength of my arms around his neck to hold my body up as I bent my legs to avoid the water. Azriel laughed and hooked one of his arms under my knees to keep me out of the water. It wasn’t easy, considering the water came up to his waist, but he managed to keep me dry.

The water didn’t seem to bother him as he carefully grabbed my waist, lifting me up slightly, almost like I had seen dancers do at the theater. I didn’t have time to voice my question before he planted my feet on a small rock that was jutting out of the river.

I waved my arms, struggling to get my balance. Once I did, I felt his grip loosen on my hips before disappearing completely. I heard the flap of his wings as he used them to jump onto the bank of the river gracefully.

I tried to turn my body towards him, to ask what the hell he thought he was doing, but the rock was just as wide as my feet pressed together. Any movement could cause me to fall into the river which I really, really did not want to do. Beyond getting my clothes wet, I knew from my run yesterday that the water here was not an agreeable temperature.

I carefully shuffled my feet, thankful that the rock was dry as the smooth surface was hard enough to balance on without it also being slippery. I also sighed in relief that it was a foot or two above the water. Slowly, I managed to turn to where Azriel lounged on the bank.

Sitting on a tree stump, fiddling with a knife, one leg propped by its ankle on his other knee, he was the picture of smugness.

I scowled at him. “Azriel, what the hell is this?”

“Training,” came his slightly shouted reply.

I raised my voice to be heard over the babbling of the river, “How in the Mother’s name is this training?”

He grabbed an apple out of a small bag I hadn’t noticed him carrying and began peeling it with his knife.

“Don’t fall.”

“What?”

“The training is: don’t fall.”

“What is this supposed to teach me other than you’re a massive prick,” I shouted, getting frustrated with his nonchalance.

He stood slowly, coming to stand closer to where the water was rushing past. He grinned. And it wasn’t the grin I had come to adore, this was a grin full of mischief and conspiracy. 

“You’ve never had Fae balance before. In any fight, having the right footing and being aware of your body is the difference between life and death. Since you don’t understand how your new body moves, you don’t know how it balances. Thus, don’t fall.”

I stared at him incredulously. “What about when the tide rises?”

He just shrugged.

“How long am I supposed to do this?” I glanced warily down at my feet, watching the water run by on either side of their positioning on the rock.

Another shrug. “Cassian’s record is a day and a half but I’m not expecting you’ll last much longer than 15 minutes.”

At that, I puffed up my chest and squared my shoulders. 15 minutes? That’s what he thought I was capable of?

I stared him right in the eye, “Prepare yourself to be here for a while then, shadowsinger.”

I settled in, trying to equally distribute my weight between my legs. I kept my gaze focused on Azriel and sorted through my brain for things I could think about to pass the time.

I ran through the plot of one of my favorite books, trying to remember quotes and the accurate order of events. It played out in my head like I was there, fighting monsters and watching an epic romance unfold.

Once I had finished my “book” I blinked back into conscious thought. “Time?” I asked.

“10 minutes.”

I groaned. I tried my best to bend my knees which had begun to stiffen but couldn’t do much beyond a small squat, fearful of falling.

“You know, if your legs are stiff, you could try bending them one at a time,” the suggestion rang out from the shore.

I gritted my teeth. I had never stood on one leg before. I’d always been too weak or in too much pain. Of course, I could do it briefly, but for the amount of time it would take to adequately stretch a leg?

I slowly eased more weight onto my left side, keeping only some in the toes of my right foot. Then, I began to bend my right leg up, as carefully and slowly as I could. I bent my knee, interlocking my fingers around my knee to hold it up for a few moments.

I smiled triumphantly. I looked at Azriel once I was certain I wasn’t going to fall.

Even from this distance, I could have sworn that I felt his pride and approval radiating through me. I ducked my head down to hide my smile - and blush - at the thought.

I let go of my right leg, dropping it back to the stone, only flailing my arms slightly to regain my balance. I repeated the entire process with the left leg, sighing in relief at the movement that brought the blood flow through my stiff muscles. ‘

By the time I had both feet back on the rock, I felt comfortable enough to bend my legs one at a time with my feet firmly planted on the rock. I probably looked ridiculous bending side to side as I shifted my weight around but I didn’t care.

I was determined to stand on here until I couldn’t anymore.

“15,” the time rang out in Azriel’s voice.

I grinned. “I told you I could make it 15 minutes.”

“Let’s see if you can make it 15 more,” the challenge was clear, taunting. 

A middle finger was my only response.

After about 5 more minutes of shifting my feet and standing in silence, I began waving at Azriel, who was now sitting on the ground, leaning against the stump. He still had his knife out though I couldn’t begin to see what he was doing with it.

Eventually, he noticed my movement and raised his attention from his little project to look at me. “Yes, Evelyn?”

“Tell me a story.”

He started. “What?”

“You heard me, a story. If I’m going to stand out here in silence for much longer my brain will rot.”

He looked at me in disbelief, caught off guard by my question. “I don’t have any stories.”

Scoffing, I tossed my hair over one shoulder, nearly slipping my left foot a little too far forward in the process. “You’re five centuries old, of course you have stories.”

“Not any good ones.”

I studied him. His shoulders had hunched forward and that teasing light had gone out of his eyes. He looked… haunted. I cursed myself for broaching the topic, unsure of what exactly plagued his memory.

I longed to reach out a hand to his shoulder to comfort him. “That’s okay, you don’t have to.”

He shook his head, his hair curling into his face. He bent his legs, spreading them wide so he could comfortably place his elbows on his knees. His practiced hands flipped the knife back and forth in a show so mesmerizing I couldn’t look away.

“It’s not that I don’t want to tell you a story. It’s that every story about my life doesn’t come with a happy ending.”

“Every ending is a happy ending,” I responded automatically. Even though his head was down, I saw the confused scrunch of his eyebrows, so I continued, “Either you’re happy it’s over or you’re happy it happened.”

When he remained silent, I elaborated, “For example, I will be ever so happy when this little training exercise is over,” I stretched a leg behind me for emphasis, “And even though I’ll be sad I don’t get to annoy you anymore, I’ll be happy I enjoyed annoying you enough that I’ll miss it.”

He nodded his head slowly, processing what I said. But still, he insisted, “You don’t want to hear my stories, Evelyn.”

“I do,” I urged him, pleading as much as I could. “They’re about you, how could I not want to hear them?”

At this, he snapped his head up. His hazel eyes met mine and then blinked slowly. Once. Twice. “Really?”

And for a second I forgot I was talking to one of the most feared people on this planet - in this realm. This wasn’t the facade of the terrifying Spymaster of the Night Court nor the imposing shadowsinger, rippling in darkness. At that moment, I was talking to someone who had never had someone take a genuine interest in them. He was… broken. And so was I.

“Really.” I said with a small smile, hoping to convey some part of the emotion that was overwhelming me. 

He offered a small smile of his own. “Well, there was the time Cassian got banned from the Summer Court.”

My mouth fell open and I nearly tumbled off the rock in shock

He smiled then, broad and genuine.

And so it continued. Stories fell from his lips nearly too fast for my mind to keep up. The annual snowball fight, the time Mor nearly broke the bank of the Night Court on dresses and wine, when he traveled to the other courts for missions, and even small stories of his time in the war.

I hung on his every word, noting how his expression changed as he recalled the different events - sometimes smiling to himself fondly, others setting his face in a grim mask.

Soon enough, I began telling stories of my own. The time Elain and I as children had chased each other around the kitchen table until she ran into the corner of it, effectively cutting her forehead open, but not deep enough to scar. Or when Nesta and I had raided our mother’s closet, trying on dresses and shoes that were much too big for us.

He listened intently to each story, asking clarifying questions and laughing when I told him something particularly mortifying like my first kiss or the first time I had gone to the local pub by myself. I didn’t miss the pride on his face as I told him of my barfight and what I’d done to the men who got a little too handsy. Every so often, he’d pointedly glance towards my legs, wordlessly reminding me to stretch them.

We had both finished laughing about him and his brothers being forced to climb the stairs at the House of Wind when we fell into a comfortable silence. He tilted his head up to the sky and closed his eyes, basking in the warmth.

“An hour,” his soft voice gave the time check.

“An hour.” I repeated it in awe, looking down at my legs. When was the last time I’d been on my feet for an hour? Probably never.

Azriel sat up from where he had laid on the bank, spreading his wings so he could prop himself up on his elbows. “You know, princess, you’ve more than proven your point. I’ll pick you up so you don’t have to swim.”

Ignoring the butterflies in my stomach at the nickname, I protested, “I’m no princess. And I’m going to stay here until I fall over.”

“Your sister’s the first High Lady,” he pointed out. “I’d argue that’s as close to a princess as you can get in Prythian.”

I snorted, stretching a leg out to the side. “And what about my behavior, exactly, screams princess to you?”

I waited for the inevitable “nothing”, waiting for the comments about how boring I am, especially compared to my sisters. But instead, I got-

“Everything. You’re intelligent, kind, and you’re always trying to better yourself. Plus, you care about people, even the people… even the people no one else notices,” he avoided my gaze as he finished.

My heart softened. Before I could stop myself, the words slipped out, “Who did this to you?”

At that, he sat up fully. “What?”

“I- Well, I…” I stopped. I hadn’t meant to say that out loud, but now that I thought about it… My body slowly began to shake in anger. He’d been alive for 500 years and for him to still be clinging on to this sense that he wasn’t enough, that nobody cared…

I felt the surety of it in my bones. He’d never feel that way again. I repeated myself, this time making it a demand, not a question “Who did this to you.”

“Evelyn, I don’t…” he sighed, running a hand through his hair. I watched the internal debate as he decided what to tell me. It didn’t matter. I’d find out and when I finished with them, there’d be nothing left.

I felt it then, that power that filled my soul and focused all of my rage. I let it rise, tingle just below the surface of my skin. How dare they? How dare they take such a caring, thoughtful male and make him feel as though he was worth nothing?

“Evelyn!”

I blinked, the anger temporarily abating. I took a deep breath and focused on my footing, letting it anchor me to myself, my body.

I looked at Azriel, pacing the shore. “I- what happened?”

He let out a sigh of relief. “You were channeling it. The Illyrian power.”

My cheeks reddened in shame.

“What happened?”

I blanched then and felt my palms get clammy as I thought about telling him how defensive of him I was. I needed a distraction. Anything.

I looked down at my feet and saw that the tide had come in. The water was just starting to lap at the heels of my shoes. That also meant that the river would now be far over my head if I were to fall in. I smiled to myself, a plan slowly taking form in my mind. I’d have to time it just right and if I could just make him think that it wasn’t on purpose…

“I was thinking about-” I made a show of losing my footing before falling into the river. “Az!”

I gasped as the icy water nipped at my skin. I pushed my way to the surface, thankful the current wasn’t that strong. Azriel stood frozen on the very edge of the river, frantically looking for where I would surface.

“Az!” I shouted, going under before popping back up. “I can’t swim!”

As I let myself go back under the water, I laughed at the panicked look on his face the second he understood what I had yelled.

I held my breath for as long as I could, using just enough force to keep myself in place. Within seconds, those familiar arms wrapped around my waist and hoisted me back up into the air.

I coughed pathetically, clasping a hand to my chest as Azriel held me in his arms. Even standing at his full height, the water was now up to his chest.

I lolled my head back, feigning weakness, and locked eyes with him. I nearly lost my composure at the absolute chaos plastered across his face. His eyes were wide, pupils were blown. His wet hair stuck in curls on his forehead. His breathing came in shallow pants, adrenaline forcing his body into overdrive.

“Evelyn, I am so sorry. I had no idea or I wouldn’t have- This was a stupid exercise and I should’ve asked,” he rushed his words, one tripping over the next, as he tried to apologize.

He finally took a deep breath to calm down and looked me over. I held it in for as long as I could but-

I burst into giggles.

His gorgeous face went from concerned to confused to completely murderous. 

“You wicked, evil female,” his eyes sparkled like the night sky.

I went to retort but found myself flying through the air and plummeting back into the water.

I pushed myself off the bottom, treading to keep my head above water. Sputtering, I looked incredulously at the male who now stood smugly in front of my stone perch.

I splashed water at him.

And, like a petulant child, the Spymaster of the Night Court splashed me back.

I fell onto my back and kicked as hard as I could, sending a spray of water in his direction. He moved to splash me again but I took off, swimming with the current as fast as I could.

I heard him cuss softly under his breath before he was launching himself after me. I laughed over my shoulder, hardly feeling the cold bite of the water as I swam. The muscles in my legs screamed in joy at the feeling of being used after standing still for so long.

I made it farther than I thought I would when I felt a gentle yet firm hand wrap around one of my ankles. I put up a weak fight, realizing just how tired my body was and how little I actually wanted to get away from him.

He pulled me into his embrace and I sent a small splash of water his way, not enough to even reach up to his neck. He smiled as I continued to struggle, at this point just being stubborn that I actually couldn’t maneuver out of his hold. 

I frowned before giving up completely. He relinquished his hold on me but I squeaked and grabbed onto his shoulders.

He stood firm against the gentle current but I didn’t feel like treading water to keep myself near him. Azriel seemed to get the message as rested a hand on my waist again to hold me in place.

I looked him over. His face, water still dripping down it from the strands of hair perched there, his arms, his broad shoulders, and his wings-

“Doesn’t it bother them?” My voice came out in a little more than a whisper.

It was enough to snap him out of his reverie and he glanced over his shoulder, flexing his wings slightly, before whispering back, “My siphons,” they flared in response, “I can concentrate the energy enough to create a sort of shield.”

I hummed appreciatively in response and reached a hand out.

He stiffened and I froze.

“May I?”

He seemed torn but nodded.

Gently, I ran a fingertip along the top of his wing.

His whole body shuddered and he tipped his head back with a sigh.

“Azriel,” it came out breathless but I couldn’t help it.

His eyes opened and met mine at the word. His gaze was dark and filled with something I hadn’t seen in his eyes before. 

I brought my hand back from his wing and moved it to brush a stray piece of hair from his forehead. Around us, the river ran higher, up to Azriel’s shoulders now, but the cold was gone. A faint blue light emanated from his siphons and I knew he was somehow keeping us warm.

I settled my hand on his cheek, relishing the feel of his skin under my fingertips and the way he leaned his head into my palm. The entire world had faded away to this moment, every breath felt like a lifetime.

I waited, part of me was still unsure about this whole situation. Part of me - the human part, perhaps - screamed that maybe this was too much, too fast.

But then his eyes widened a bit, pleading, and he begged - begged - “Just kiss me, Evelyn. Please.”

I was helpless to do anything but fulfill his wish. I was his, so utterly and completely his. 

And even if this was just a moment, if this was the moment that I’d have to remind myself to just be happy that it happened when it ended, it was enough. He would always be enough. Every moment with him was a happy ending. I so desperately miss and cherish each one when they’re over.

I smiled, running my hand through his hair, I said, “As you wish.”

-

Taglist: @mis-lil-red @ambivertedcroissant @reareaikea @biblophilefox82 @in-some-fandoms @hollyismentallyillhelp @donttellmehowtowrite @issybee0611 @vera0124 @juulle987 @bankerfrog @pricklepearbloom @sevikas-whore

#acotar #acomaf #acowar #acofas #acosf #azriel shadowsinger #azriel x reader #azriel x ofc #azriel

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for breaking up with my friend at a party he was hosting?

Basically, I've (F40s) been friends with this guy, F (M40s) for about twenty years. We met when we were in college (different schools but lived in the same apartment building) and he has been my absolute best friend pretty much ever since. For a very long time, until a couple of years ago, we were a group of three with my other best friend, C (M40s), but C and F had a large, public, and extremely dramatic falling out. Since then, I've managed to stay friends with both of them, but C and F haven't spoken since their fight.

One of the reasons C and F stopped being friends was the life choices that F made. F started out as an artist, an extremely talented and pretty successful and accomplished composer. C was his partner in writing (a genius playwright and lyricist), but got frustrated over years of watching F choose to chase success over creative satisfaction, leading to F often forgetting about the projects he was supposed to be working on with C. I understood where both of them were coming from; F wanted success and fame regardless of where it came from, while C wanted to make art for art's sake, and their different outlooks on why they were doing what they did led to their eventual split.

I never agreed with F's choices to chase fame and fortune, but ultimately, it was his choice to make. I never thought he was actually happy, but for the last years of our friendship, I was just hoping he'd realize that on his own. Over time, being friends with him became more stressful than it was fulfilling. I'll admit, I've always been a little bit in love with F, so it was even more painful for me to see him marry somebody else and be happy with her, which I was obviously sad about but happy for him, only to throw that relationship away by cheating with a woman who is terrible for him. After his divorce, he practically abandoned his son, which I also hated. His ex moved across the country, and even though F became extremely rich and successful, I still saw his son more than him. F didn't even go to his son's high school graduation, and I did. That was the breaking point for me.

I've stood by F for years despite the disastrous choices he's made. He abandoned his oldest and closest friend over different opinions, which is his choice but still seemed unnecessary to me, threw away all creative integrity he once had for the sake of making terrible movies that sold well but said nothing, abandoned his son, and even after marrying the woman that caused his divorce, cheated on her with a woman half his age and didn't even bother to keep it a secret. I was fed up.

F invited me to a huge party with his new Hollywood friends to celebrate the release of one of his movies. He paid for my flight out. I knew when I accepted that I was ready to end this friendship, which is where I think I might be the asshole. I was drunk before the party even started, a habit that began as a coping mechanism for the stress that F added to my life a while ago, because I knew I wouldn't be brave enough to go through with it without the alcohol. During the party, F brazenly flirted with and even kissed the young woman he's currently cheating on his wife with, and his other "friends" in the room either didn't care or treated it like fun gossip. I drank more. His wife, who has always hated me and known my feelings for F (unsure of if those two facts are connected, honestly), was cruel to me. His "friends" treated me like trash. Eventually, I spoke my mind. Yes, I was drunk, but I meant every word. Everybody in the room was fake and terrible, and F had turned into the kind of person who had earned their treatment of him. He isn't the man I met when I was 20 and fell in love with, not anymore. I never meant to break up the friendship as publically as I did, and I know doing it at the party and insulting his friends made it a much bigger deal than it had to be, but I couldn't wait to do it anymore. I needed it to be done.

So, AITA?

#aita #am i the asshole #unreality #alcohol

[yandere-chocolate]

(It’s okay, ともだち, I understand! I’ll try my best!^^)

(Misspellings & grammatical errors will be prevalent, as with any fan fiction ever.)

Yandere Slenderman x Insomniac Reader ~(Plamantic)~

TW/CW: insomnia, severe headaches, stalking, slight body horror, threats, kidnapping

You couldn’t sleep. Your head hurt too much. It almost felt like static in your brain. Every night, after you moved into this cabin, your head would become fuzzy & so would your sight. You had no idea why, but no medication works & your doctor is at a loss for words at this point.

You had no idea a faceless, tall, lanky figure was watching you from the woods. The tall man had first noticed you when you were taking a leisurely stroll through its woods. You could sleep back then.

As the two of you walked together, only one of you knew the other was there, the tall man decided you wouldn’t be a good meal. Not because you wouldn’t taste good—oh no! Simply because you made him feel something. Something other than hunger. Something warm.

Now, Slenderman watches you from afar. For now. Each night the monster grows closer & closer to your house, causing your headaches & insomnia to get worse & worse. As you held your head in pain you decided to get some water. Though, you could swear you kept seeing a pale face from outside out of the corner of your eye; through the windows. It made your legs a little more stiff & sent a chill up your spine. You got your water & rushed upstairs to the safety of your bedroom. Was it stupid to be so scared of what was probably nothing at all? Probably.

You drank your water & felt your headache get worse, & worse, & worse! You felt a sharp pain in your head & instinctively dropped your glass, ignoring the fact it fell off your bed & shattered onto the floor. That wasn’t as bad as ignoring the door opening, though.

Suddenly, the pain, the static in your brain, stopped. You were relieved until you payed back on your bed, only to see a tall, pale, faceless creature hunched over above your head.

Your heart stopped.

Your blood ran cold.

What could you do?! WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN A MONSTER IS HOVERING OVER YOU?! You breath hitched & stifled. The creature did nothing, simply staring at your face. At least you think its staring. You can’t really tell, to be honest.

The creature’s face opens up, tearing apart to create a mouth with sharp teeth.

You screamed, making the creature jolt & shut said maw. It jolted less because of the loud noise & more just out of sudden concern that you were afraid.

“Is this better, dear?” You heard a voice in your head ask. It didn’t sound the usual voices, which are usually just your own or the ones you want, no. It was almost like hearing someone from across the room.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you! I just thought speaking to you directly would be nicer than telepathically!” The voice continued. Is that creature…?

“Yes! I normally use this voice to lure people away from home & eat them but…you’re a special occasion!” The creature’s…er…“features” lifted, almost as if it was smiling. You tried to shift as far back into your mattress as you could go.

“Now, sweetheart, how do you suppose we go about this?” The lanky figure asked, holding a single finger to its face as it pondered. “Go about what?” You said, voice quiet & shaky from the fear still instilled into your body. “Taking you into the woods, of course!” “THE WHAT?!” Well, that shaky voice was gone, “the woods! Into my home! You can’t stay here, of course, you might call for help & I will have to take drastic measures!” The creature split open its face to reveal the horrifying mouth once more.

“Very. Drastic. Measures~” The voice sounded darker. It was deeper & more gravely. It closed up the mouth & picked you up out of the bed.

“Anyway, you can stay at another cabin! An abandoned one! It may have a few…blood stains, but we can clean those up, I’m sure.”

The creature then carried you off, leaving you scared, unable to argue. It might kill you if you try to fight back in any way shape or form!

You just hoped you would be able to escape eventually.

(Sorry about the more fannon take, but you could’ve left at any time soo…

Also, apologies if this gave off more Spenderman vibes. IwilldoSpendermanmanisweargoloki)

#yandere #yanderecore #yandere blog #yandere x reader #yandere creepypasta #yandere Slenderman #yandere creepypasta x reader #yandere monster #yandere Slenderman x reader

[julietwiskey1]

De-Aged Azula: Mochi Hunt

Azula dressed in her pajamas looked around the kitchen holding out a small blue orb of flames in one hand while Sparky (her favorite dragon stuffed animal) was held tight in the other. Her eyes darted around the room. Her heart rate quickened as every moment here increased her chances of being caught. But the spoils would be worth it.

Mochi.

The most delightful thing her mom had ever unjustly hidden from her and Kiyi. One night of accidentally eating too much and she could no longer be trusted with it.

In a low whisper she turned to Sparky, “do you know where it could be.” Nodding as if she heard him her eyes turned to the high up cabinet with a lock on it. “Of coarse she would put it in there.”

With a steely determination she set about her work. Setting a chair by the counter to let her climb up, and then moving a few empty boxes so she could reach the lock with her hands high above her head. With a small smirk she remembered what Sokka showed her on lockpicking. The lock was a near perfect copy to the one Sokka showed her.

A moment later she returned with a knife held tight between her teeth. “Of coarse diss is fwhine sarky” she mumbled in response to Sparky skeptical look.

It felt like she was up there for hours moving the knife around. Hitting the little metal parts trying to coax it open. Her arms were starting to get tired from holding the knife above her head.

As she was about to give up and head for bed she heard a click and the shackle fell away, nearly smashing her toe as it hurtled to the ground. The shock caused her to wobble and nearly lose her grip on the knife. A moment before disaster she was able to grab onto the cabinet and steady herself.

“I’m fine Sparky! And we’re in, like I said we will be.” Opening up the cabinet she saw bottles. Row after row of large glass bottles. They type Zuzu, Mom and others drank from but was forbidden to her. “They’re not here!”

She looked around in desperation. No sign of her favorite sweet. Azula had gone through all that effort for nothing! Just as she was about to give up she saw a small box behind some bottles.

With a smile she reached for it. Her fingers just barely scraped the corner. She frowned as she got onto the tippy toe of one foot as she reached over. The hand holding the knife grasped onto a shelf. It was just enough that she could take hold of the box.

It was heavy. Heavier than what she was expecting. Surely that meant it had more mochi than what she was expecting then.

The box she stood on wobbled slightly. The motion only grew as it traveled up her body. Soon she was swaying back and forth. The knife went flying across the room. And the box of mochi hit several of the glass bottles sending them diving to the floor.

Next thing she knew she sent a ball of fire at the rapidly approaching ground, trying to beat it back.

THUNK

Azula hit the ground and rolled away. Looking up she saw the shelf she held onto starting to tip. As if in slow motion one bottle after the next fell off until the entire shelf fell.

CRASH

BOOM

CRACK

Azula just stared in disbelief. The room smelled foul from the alcohol. The box she reach for was split smashed apart to reveal the now dented remains of small silver cups. Shards of glass glittered the entire floor around her.

With a look at Sparky confidently and safely perched on the counter she growled. “WHAT? I didn’t know that was going to happen. And YOU said there would be mochi.”

The door burst opened behind her and the yellowish glow of her mothers flame filled the room. “Oh, my. What happen… Azula. AZULA! Are you alright?”

Ursa rushed forward to pluck Azula off the ground and away from the broken shards of glass. Setting her on the counter she looked at her hands and feet, and tilted her head as if to inspect for damage. “What are you doing here?”

Azula felt herself squeak out, “I don’t know.” Her pain, panic, and fear set in all at once as she began to cry. Her moms eyes grew wide, as she muttered something Azula wasn’t allowed to say.

“Does your head hurt?”

“A bit.” In an instant Ursa lifted Azula up into her arms. Before Azula knew it they were nearly out of the kitchen before Azula tried to leap out of her mothers arms before being held on tight “WAIT.”

“What? Oh sparky.” Going back to pick up the Dragon Ursa checked it for any broken glass before letting her daughter wrap her arms around it.

For the next couple hours Azula sat in the infirmary as the doctors kept on asking her a bunch of silly questions and flashing lights in her eyes. Eventually they said she was fine and her mom carried her back to bed.

“You nearly gave me a heart attack Azula. We still don’t get how you weren’t more seriously hurt in the fall.” Her mother but her lip. “I don’t know what I would do if you were hurt my little dragon. Don’t do that again.” Ursa leaned over and kissed Azula’s on the forehead and tucked her in. “Have this. It should make you feel better.” In her hand she held out a couple balls of mochi.

Azula leapt out of bad and grabbed them both shoving one into her mouth. “Thanks mom.” She said from stuffed cheeks.

“No problem dear.”

Azula laid back in bed as her mom left. The mission no matter how off track it went was a success.

#de aged azula #azula #ursa #my fanfic #just some silly fluff

[moderator-monnie]

The Darkness Reaches Us Everywhere. (An SQL!Rot story) FINAL

This is a story about the fusion between my exe SQL Slammer Sonic and @sonicexelle-junkary 's horror sonic au The Rot, the fusion in question named SQL!Rot.

Cream made her way to school just in time and sat at her desk and started to write down what the teacher said, listening in close. She prided herself on being one of the best students.

Throughout the morning, though, she started to cough, and her throat began to feel really scratchy. She pulled out some water and slowly drank it, just choosing to ignore it. They all started out slowly at first.

The teacher did notice and stopped his lesson for a moment, deciding to ask. "Are you alright, Cream? Do you need to call home?" In response, Cream shook her head and said, "No, I'm fine, Mr. Thunderbain! My mama is just a little sick, so I might have just caught her cough, but I'll be able to make it throughout the day."

The teacher nodded and went back to teaching, and afterwards cream coughed less and less notably, but soon it was time for recess and all the kids went outside. Cream sat on the swing set and began to swing herself back and forth.

As time passed, Cream slowly began to feel more and more dizzy. She slowly blinked her eyes, watering, and it started to become harder to see. She slowly groaned in pain but kept on swinging.

She picked up speed, swinging higher and higher until the bell rang, and she suddenly let go of the chains and went flying, hitting her head across the nearby monkey bars, and her entire body went limp.

By the time all this happened, only the teacher was left outside, who saw the whole thing. He rushed over to make sure she was okay, and in a panicked voice, he spoke. "Oh, dear god, Cream, are you okay? Just stay there; we'll get you some help."

Cream's head was split open, slowly leaking out blood. The teacher picked her up, putting her head over his shoulder, reaching into his bag, and began to dial the hospital.

As he started to dial the number, creams blood leaked all over his entire back, and suddenly it began to thicken and turn black. By the time the phone picked up and he was about to speak, he suddenly began to choke as a black slimey hand made from worms began to strangle him.

Cream slowly pulled her head off his shoulder; her eyes had completely changed into a similar state to her mothers; her head completely split open, continuously leaking the tar like worms; and she grabbed the phone, crushing it in her hands as the operator was trying to say something.

The teacher looked down at Cream with complete fear in his eyes, and she just smiled at him as he started to lose breath and said, "We are fine, Mr. Thunderbain the Duck, and soon you will be fine too." and afterwards, a neck snap could be heard.

Both Cream and the teacher fell to the ground, and the black worm-like hand forced his mouth open, and slowly, one by one, some worms spilled into his mouth, filling it completely, all of them forcing their way down his throat.

The young bunny soon dragged his body away quickly into some nearby bushes; no one else had heard or seen any of this due to all of them being too excited for lunch to stick around.

Cream looked up at the school; the skin around her head wound slowly sealed back up; her eyes returned to normal; and she giggled before heading off to lunch.

She'd skip away and act like everything was normal, though with a slightly wider smirk on her face, this would be the start of the end.

#SQL!Rot #Slammer Sonic #The Rot #contaminated au #character fusion #horror story #sonic the hedgehog #tw: worms #tw: virus #vanilla the rabbit #cream the rabbit #The Darkness Reaches Us Everywhere. (An SQL!Rot story) #part 4 #Final #remember reblogs do more then likes! #tw: death

[countrymusiclover]

12 - Teasing Beau

Part 13

Other Hoyt's Off Limits

Tag list- just ask to be added @stoneyggirl2 @dragonixfrye

Unknown to either of us Jenny was sitting at the bar clutching a beer bottle in her hands watching the two of us before Cassie came and sat down beside her. "Jenny, I think you were wrong about Mallory." The blonde knew she wasn't leaving the bar anytime soon tonight.

Jenny raised her beer to her lips, scoffing. "I don't want to talk about this, Cass. She clearly doesn't care what I think, considering she was just doing karaoke with Beau a few minutes ago."

"Come on, Jenny. You can't really be mad at her over this. She is a grown person and should be able to make the choice on her own." Her friend explained ordering a beer for herself.

Jenny shook her head not wanting to admit that she might be right. Even if she was she could have told her that she changed her mind and had found someone she liked. But she didn't do anything like that, that was why she was frustrated with her little sister. "I get it, Cassie. But she lied to me. She lied to me even though she came home begging me to find her a guy that wasn't going to hurt her. I was doing my job to protect her and she just threw our trust away."

"So you're just going to be mad at her forever over this?" Cassie asked her. "I mean I get that she is your little sister. But she has to make her own choices in life. If she does get hurt again all you can do is be there for her."

Jenny sighed, pulling out some money paying the bartender sliding off the barstool. "I'll see you tomorrow, Cassie. And you're right I am doing it to look out for her. I just can't forgive her so easily."

"You did it for me with Cody. How is this any different?" Her friend asked, turning around on her barstool.

Jenny Hoyt paused in the doorway of the bar looking back at her. "I'm not gonna answer that. Goodnight Cassie."

Mallory's POV

Stretching my arms and legs out I turned over in a bed finding the other side was empty. Sitting upright I felt my head hurting from the amount of drinks we had last night at the bar. Looking around I was inside Beau's trailer where he was asleep on the couch that I could see in the living room. "Beau, Beau. Wake up." I called his name seeing he didn't move and just snored.

Grabbing one of the pillows I threw one on his stomach where he grumbled waking up rubbing his eyes looking ame confused. "Who the what - Mallory. Oh boy, we should not have drank tequila last night."

"For sure...do you happen to have any pain medicine anywhere?" I asked closing my eyes gently, laying back down, pulling the covers over my face seeing the sunlight trying to break through the curtains of the window.

Beau got up from the couch rummaging around in a cabinet or something before he gently pulled back the covers handing me a pill. Sitting back up I took it before he sat at the foot of the bed turning his phone on changing into a panicked state. "Crap I can't believe I forgot about Emily. She's gonna be so mad if I am late. And Carla has left three voicemails."

"Beau whoa slow down. What has you so freaked out. Just talk to me." I asked, swinging my legs over the side of the bed so we were sitting beside each other.

He turned his head in my direction running his freehand through his hair creating a messy look. We didn't get back to the trailer until almost midnight just talking at the bar till they closed for the evening. "I told her that we could spend the day together just the two of us. But I have this splitting headache and she is coming over in an hour."

"Hey Beau, it's okay. Look, I'll help you get through this hangover. And if you want, this could be the day I meet your daughter officially if you want." I suggested clasping my hands together in my lap feeling my headache starting to get better after taking the pain medicine.

The sheriff shot me a look of confusion at my offer. The two of you hadn't talked about meeting his daughter yet. Since we were still trying to take things slowly. "I mean if you want too we can Mallory. I don't want to pressure you into anything. Emily will probably be thrilled."

"Don't worry it won't be like the argument with my sister last night. She seems really nice, Beau." I replied, getting to my feet trying to make myself not look like I passed out here with her father before the girl would get here.

It was exactly an hour before a car pulled up in the driveway and I saw Emily get out waving bye to her mother when we stepped outside onto the porch. "Hey dad. Hey Mallory." She hugged him gently, smiling at the both of us.

"Hey 'Em, so there is something we should talk about." Beau broke the hug glancing my direction with a nervous smile on his face. He is normally a very confident person up until this moment in front of me and his daughter.

The teenage girl nodded, opening the door, putting her bag inside as we all sat down in chairs staring at one another in silence. I wasn't sure what to say or how to start the conversation between me and her. "So what did you guys want to talk about?"

"Well Em, do you remember when I was telling you about a new girl that I was dating. The truth is that she is Mallory. Jenny's sister even though the three of us work together." Beau explains slumping his shoulders still feeling nervous about what she would say next.

She grinned ear to ear, slapping her hands on her knees before getting up and hugging me suddenly. "That is so great. Mallory. Now there is some stuff I have to tell you about my dad. Like he wants to have you and your dog move in with him and he also snores sometimes at night. Oh and-"

"Alright alright kiddo. How about you get settled in for the night. I'm gonna talk with Mal." Beau held his hands up, cutting her off before she could say something else.

I chuckled watching her leave us outside alone before I intertwined his hands with mine. "Calm down Beau. I don't think she will embarrass you too much. I am just revealed that she actually likes me."

"See I told you she would. You're a special girl to me,Mallory." He leaned down kissing me where I kissed him until an idea popped into my head where I broke away from him going to find Emily.

Flinging the door opened I called down the hallway remembering something that he has done at work that me and Jenny found hilarious. "Emilf if you want to talk about your father he has a ten year old picture of himself on the sheriffs department website and he refuses to change it!"

"Mallory, I'm not changing the picture. And she doesn't need to know that." Beau sighed heavily standing in the doorway seeing us sitting on the couch laughing now.

Emily laughed falling back until she pointed her index finger at me. "He says people in Texas call him BT but I don't remember anyone ever calling him that."

Covering my mouth with my hands I started laughing even more at how easy we were getting along with Beau just standing uncomfortably in front of us. "Oh my gosh. I can't wait to hear more."

"Who wants breakfast? Oh, is that my phone? Maybe it's a call from Cassie." Beau pretended to search for his phone until I got to my feet, kissing him slowly with a smile.

Wrapping my arms around his neck he smiled into the kiss. "Awe don't worry, Beau. Isn't it important that we are bonding and like each other even if it's over you."

"I guess so, Mal." He mumbled looking back at his daughter where she takes a picture of us holding each other like this smiling back at her.

Comments really appreciated ❤️

#other hoyt's off limits #beau arlen x you #beau arlen big sky #beau arlen x y/n #beau arlen x reader #beau arlen #jensen ackles #jenny hoyt x sister reader #jenny hoyt #cassie dewell #big sky season 3 #big sky hulu #emily arlen #wattpad fanfiction #ask box is open for feedback #comments really appreciated #oc : mallory cessna #sunny barnes #cormac barnes

[heyitssashag]

Life Before Cancer

Warning: This is a long post. I apologize in advance for grammar but I’m journalling this for my own therapeutic benefit. Ergo, I don’t care about grammar. lol. (Although, I may come back and edit it later.)

I’ve written in dribs and drabs of what life was like for me before being diagnosed with cancer. It’s a bit hard to summarize something for a little Tumblr blog but I’m going to try. One day, I would like to write either a memoir or an autobiography for my kid so maybe the first step is writing an outline here…

Okay, maybe not an autobiography outline. I just started writing from childhood then re-read it and deleted it. It’s too long. It’ll be something I’ll do on Google Docs. Maybe I’ll post the links per chapter and if anyone wants to read about the boring life of yours truly, then it’ll be there. Anyway, moving on…

Life leading up to being diagnosed with stage 2b breast cancer.

I was diagnosed with early stage breast cancer July 13, 2018. A year and a half before that, my ex and I (of about 9 years) split up. We were never married. He proposed. There was a ring. I said yes. I wore the ring. I never planned to marry him, though. I loved him but I never felt safe or stable enough to actually take the plunge. What does that mean? It basically means I didn’t trust him. He was a bullshitter. The guy had a lot of issues (which I won’t get into because it’s irrelevant, now). That being said, he did have a great job, he was kind and did a lot of nice things for the kid and I. However, the last year and a bit of our relationship was the shits. He went to work. Came home. Drank. He was always a talker but ended up emotionally shutting down. He just seemed apathetic and bitter about everything. He turned mean.

He pretty much stopped wanting to do anything besides play video games and get high. In the end, all he did was mow the lawn and put out the garbage. That was the extent of his household contribution. He was in construction so he was “handy” but by that last year, he was emotionally “checked-out” and wasn’t into doing anything. He slept on the couch most of the time, too.

It mostly went downhill when he was transferred to a site that was pretty far away. He was up at 4:30am and out the door a little after 5am. Most of the time, he wasn’t home until 7pm or later. Every other Saturday he had to go into work, too. So I understood that he was stressed and burnt out. (Speaking of “burnt” out, he was also a heavy smoker. Which I despised.)

So the resentment was building - on both sides. I didn’t let him quit his job, either. He was there a long time and I kept talking him out of it as he would lose a lot of benefits and built up vacation time. This didn’t help with the resentment on his part.

I thought about leaving him but couldn’t afford it. At this point, I was a stay at home Mom and the cost of housing had skyrocketed overnight. The kid needed a lot of support as well and I didn’t know how I could juggle it all. I was at their school helping out a lot. Then I would do personal training to bring in extra cash.

I had to have a surgery during that time to remove a large dermoid cyst from my ovary. The incision apparently hit a nerve and I couldn’t walk. I was recommended to stay the night in hospital for pain control but he was the least compassionate partner you could have asked for. He told me I needed to come home. So, stupidly enough, I did. I was wheel-chaired out and throwing up as I was getting into the car to go home. I was left completely alone to fend for myself with the no support. I could barely make it to the bathroom and he wouldn’t help me. He would say I was being a wimp. That was the final straw of when I knew the relationship was over. Unfortunately, I never got my shit together to leave. I just ignored it.

The Break-Up

I found out a few months later that he was cheating with a labourer from his work site. Even though I knew our relationship was in the tank, I was still devastated. How he could lie like that was beyond me. I didn’t understand why he just didn’t leave. Apparently, a lot of the time he said he was staying at work, he was actually with her. I was livid. I found the texts on his phone. I wanted to message this woman back but there was no point. There was no reviving this relationship. The kid and I left. Him and his new girlfriend got married and pregnant within a few months after that. They’re still together. Living in the same crappy rental house but I think he’s changed jobs a half a dozen times since.

We officially split up in January 2017, and the kid and I moved in with my sister and family for 2 months so I could find a job and save enough to get a place. There was literally nothing to rent. At that point, I hadn’t had a traditional job for about 7 years, either. My self esteem was not exactly good. So the first place I applied to, they offered me a job and I took it. It was in retail - selling women’s clothing for minimum wage at the mall. I also worked for my parents in their office. (Luckily, they paid me above minimum wage.)

New Home & New Job

I got a 1 bedroom apartment on the 27th floor in a new tower with an amazing view across from the mall. It was in a busy area, central location with the skytrain around the corner. They tower itself had a lot of amenities that I barely had time to use. (ie Gym. Pool & hot tub. Recreation/party room, etc). It was very expensive and small but it was safe and close to work. Couldn’t find a home any closer to my job if I tried.

The kid’s school was 2 busses away. Many times, I had to call a cab and send them that way as I couldn’t be at 2 places at once. Even though I set up things for my kid to do after school (girls group, youth worker, behaviour intervention, etc) it wasn’t enough. My kid felt very abandoned by me during that time. I even tried doing split shifts so I was there to drop them off and pick them up from school but then I wouldn’t be walking in the door until nearly 10pm and my kid was already asleep. I initially tried finding a place close to their school but nothing was available.

Another New Job

Eventually, I knew working the way I was, wasn’t sustainable. I took a new job at another store where I was offered an assistant manager position. The problem was, we had no manager. She suddenly went on medical leave. So I was thrown into a management role making assistant manager wages for a number of months. The area supervisor eventually hired someone for the management role about 5 months later, which left me completely dumbfounded. I thought I would have been first pick …but that was my mistake. I didn’t ask or apply. However, I also didn’t know they were hiring a replacement or I would have. Apparently, the supervisor hired this person on a whim and pressured the previous manager to quit. It was all very weird and slimy.

Becoming Sick

During that time, I wasn’t feeling well, anyway. My energy levels were dropping substantially. I was spending hundreds at the supplement store trying to find something to help. I knew I was anemic but my energy levels were plummeting so fast - something didn’t feel “right”. Being on my feet all day with limited sleep didn’t help. I remember hanging some clothes back out on the floor and feeling so dizzy, I held onto the rack to hold me up. I felt like I could literally fall into the clothes and go to sleep at that moment. Over that past year, I had also dealt with walking pneumonia, 2 ear infections (resulting in them rupturing), a serious staph infection over a routine procedure at the hospital, then a horrible C. difficile infection. Followed by walking pneumonia - again. I was asked on numerous occasions by different doctors if I had a compromised immune system.

I turned into a giant ball of stress and started to get emotional at work.

Little did I know I had cancer lurking in my body. I did have a few palpable lumps for about 6 months but was told they were fibroadenomas (benign mass). Over a year prior, (before my ex and I split) I had an ultrasound which showed a few very tiny (less than half a cm) masses. I’ve had 5 large fibroadenoma’s removed over the past 25 years so I wasn’t concerned at all.

Taking a Break

Anyway, once my new manager came on board, I resigned as assistant and left for about 6 weeks. I had a bit of savings and was still working for my parents part-time but ended up having to subsidize my income with credit cards.

During that month and a half, I got a mammogram, a physical, spent time with my kid, ate much healthier and used the gym. I started to feel a bit better and returned to work as a shift manager. I had much less responsibility and way less stress. I was there for selling clothes and training newbies.

Diagnoses

Unfortunately, I was barely back at work for a month and found out I had breast cancer. My condo also sold and was taken over by a different property management company that was anal to the point of ridiculous. My calendar was chalk full of numerous appointments, tests, consults, lab work, surgery, chemo all in the space of 5 months. I fell into a massive depression. I felt horrible putting my family out. The guilt was overwhelming. My kid’s school completely let us down so I pulled them out and homeschooled them. There was so much stress. My oncologist stopped my chemotherapy treatment half way through - just before Christmas of 2018.

Returning to “Normal” Life

All I wanted to do was get my life back on track. I moved to my sister and brother in-law’s basement suite. I remember applying for jobs. I threw on a wig and immediately went in for interviews. Unfortunately, my body was still recuperating from treatment and the new hormone therapy was really hard to get used to at first. I was getting hot flashes constantly.

I decided that maybe I should look into retraining but I didn’t want to spend a pile of money when I wasn’t sure. I was already up to my eyeballs in debt. So, I volunteered at: the crisis line, the ER department at a hospital, assisted at the Salvation Army drop in centre in the downtown eastside, facilitated groups and health mentoring for Self Management BC and was a health mentor for the Interprofessional program at UBC. All while I was still homeschooling my kid and working part time for my parents.

Apparently, I didn’t learn my lesson about “over doing” things.

I did all of this for over a year until the pandemic hit in March 2020 and everything shut down. That time was a big blur. I still continued with a number of volunteer positions and homeschooled the kid. Being on the crisis line over the pandemic sucked. To this day, I have no idea why I kept up with it. I seriously dreaded it. I would have callers saying how much I helped them but the crisis line itself kept losing/hiring workers and man, talk about micromanagement. Nothing like giving your time and getting no positive feedback. It wasn’t just me - I overheard other workers getting their calls ripped apart. Over time, it was soul-sucking. I completed over 50 hours of training with an additional 196 of volunteering on the phones. I didn’t complete my last shift due to neck pain. My last shift was January 1st 2021.

Neck Pain

Mid-October 2020, I woke up with neck pain on my right side. I figured it was due to the weather changing. I waited a few weeks to tell my doctor and he said I should have a bone scan, anyway. Dec 4th, I had the scan. It came back with mild degeneration in the neck and was dismissed as arthritis. The pain obviously persisted and I ended up in hospital a few weeks later with diverticulitis caused by excessive Advil usage. I had returned to hospital multiple times for my severe neck pain and no one would give me a CT or an MRI. “Put Volataren on it” (which is a type of anti inflammatory cream) is what I was told. Then one day I lost feeling in my finger and thumb and my doctor sent me in for an urgent MRI. By that point, it was too late. The results came back that there was lesions on my C spine (but I wasn’t told it was cancer). I was immediately referred to a neurosurgeon. 4 days later I broke my neck (Apr 2nd 2021) by just turning my head coming out of the shower. The ambulance was called and I came home 2 weeks later a completely different person.

I complained for 5 months about my pain. I’m surprised it didn’t break sooner. However, it spread like wildfire during that time.

Financial Stuff

In the end, I had to claim bankruptcy which was hugely embarrassing for me. I wanted so bad to get myself out of debt but it became impossible. I initially wanted to consolidate but the trustees encouraged me to just go bankrupt as I could get a clean slate quicker and have one less thing to think about. They were wonderful and very caring. No judgement at all. My sister also did a GoFundMe which helped to get me equipment, ready made meals for the kid and me, home cleaning, transportation/taxi’s, items for the kid, easy, comfortable clothing for me to get in and out of. Just so much. We had a lot of help and support from the community.

A few weeks later, my sister and brother in-law announced they were divorcing. They have been dealing with issues for many years and were hanging on by a thread for a long time. The pandemic became the cherry on top. They insisted I didn’t have to move but I knew after a few months, the kid and I had to find somewhere else to go. My parents started to prepare their house for sale while I started to pack.

Anyway…

Let’s Wrap this Up

There’s two common questions I get asked since I got cancer:

1.) What do you think contributed/caused your cancer?

2.) What do you regret not doing in your life - or wished you did more of?

These are both heavy questions and I generally say “stress” for the 1st and “not travelling more” for the 2nd. It keeps the answers light and doesn’t invite more questions. Other than “Oh, where would you want to travel to?!” In which I would reply a random place in Europe and they would proceed to either tell me the time they went there or how a friend of theirs went there.

Honestly, there’s probably a lot of things that contributed to my cancer. Things like:

My ex smoked like a chimney.

In my late teens/early twenties I was on a lot of psychiatric medications.

Not taking care of myself more.

I was stressed out to the point where I woke up with what felt like butterflies in my stomach, every-single-day. The anxiety was always running high.

As for regrets, I regret staying in relationships that were long past their expiration date. I really did want to find a partner (a soul mate 💕) and get married. Now, it’s not happening. I have far too much baggage and would never want to burden another person with this full time. It makes me sad and it’s just one more thing I have to grieve. But, like everything else: “It is what it is”.

On that note, there have been a few good things that did come out of this shit-show. We live in a beautiful home in a gorgeous area (because my parents subsidize my rent). I’m not loaded down with drama because there’s a giant body of water between me and most people I know. For the most part, I can concentrate on my health and my kid.

So I’m wrapping up this excessively long post for now. It helped me unload some stuff out of my brain and I feel better for it. If you made it this far, congratulations and thank-you. lol. Have a wonderful weekend. 🌈

#metastatic breast cancer #breast cancer #breast cancer story #cancer #cancer treatment #broken neck rehab #my life before breast cancer took over

[fortheloveoffanfic]

Mr. Gallagher and Me

Jim x Reader

A/n- I feel like y'all are gonna figure me out with this one, but its fine lol

Playlist Chapter 6 Masterlists

Chapter 7

Jim introduces Y/n to an old friend. Insecurities and a repeated mistake may lead to the end of Jim and Y/n's relationship

Early November The diner Jim had taken her to while they were grading papers a year earlier had unofficially become ‘their place’ and every time they ate there, they'd split a Knickerbocker for dessert. They were probably on track to becoming the establishment’s best customers, not that either of them minded. She and Jim had gone that day primarily to get away from the hustle of the pre-exam season, his students had been requesting private meetings left and right, most of them eagerly asking for extensions or extra credit assignments and while Jim was usually as accommodating as possible, that day, he’d disclosed that he really just wanted to have one lunch without a nervous freshman knocking on his door and asking if he had ‘five minutes to spare’. Likewise, Y/n was growing tired of devoting her scraps of free time, left over from making final corrections to her thesis, helping Jim grade midterms and assisting with compiling the exam papers, to students that had opted to skip classes over the past few months, only to gather some concern for their GPA at the end of the semester. 

“Feels like we’re running away,” Y/n laughed softly, bringing her tea to her lips. 

“We are running away,” Jim chuckled, licking his lower lips before taking a sip of his coffee, “But it's for good reason because those first years are relentless,” he huffed, leaning further against the cushioned back of his seat. 

Y/n was about to respond when the bell over the diner’s front door jingled and two women walked in, one significantly younger than the other, though both were tall brunettes. Most of the patrons were usually regulars and every time she and Jim went there, she could recognize almost everyone in the establishment as someone she’d seen before, but the pair that had just entered, she’d never seen them before. After a moment though, as they got seated at a table near her and Jim’s preferred booth, Y/n stopped paying any mind to them. 

“I’m just gonna run to the bathroom,” Y/n said quietly as she stood abruptly, “Be right back.”

“Are you okay?” Jim knitted his brows, making her pause reluctantly.

“Yeah, I’m fine, why?’ Y/n frowned, a little annoyed that he was holding her back when she really had to use the bathroom. “It's just the tea,” she waved off his concern and before he could say anything else, she hurried off towards the back, where the ladies room was. 

She didn’t take any longer than ten minutes in the restroom, making a mental note to slow down on the fluids for the rest of the evening. Even if she had brushed of Jim’s innocent concern, Y/n had to admit, running to the bathroom that often was becoming annoying; immediately after she’d arrived on campus that morning, twice during a review session she’d held for a few students, when she and Jim had gotten to the diner and then just now- she didn’t even think she’d drank that much of anything! The worst part was that it had been going on for weeks, since they’d gotten back from Derry, according to her calculation. 

But she felt completely fine otherwise, so there couldn’t have been anything to worry about. 

Of course there'd been headaches and back pain sometimes, but that was just stress. 

Shaking off the thoughts, Y/n finished drying her hands and then checked her hair in the mirror before heading out in the direction of their usual booth. She was almost half way there when she caught a glimpse of the brunette woman from earlier, standing at their table, talking to Jim. He was standing too, and they looked like they knew each other well. For a minute, she paused, trying to figure out if returning to the table would be an intrusion. Though, she wasn't given much time to think it through though, because when Jim turned his head, he glimpsed Y/n and then gestured for her to come over. 

Smiling, Y/n approached them, her nerves settling a little when Jim’s arm snake around her waist, “Yvonne,” he diverted from whatever their original conversation was about, and Y/n’s breath upon hearing the woman’s name. Yvonne, he’d mentioned her name a couple times; his wife’s best friend, the woman he had an affair with. “This is my girlfriend, Y/n.”

“Oh,” Yvonne smiled kindly, albeit a little stiffly, extending her hand and after a few seconds of hesitation, Y/n took it so they could shake warmly. In that moment, Y/n realized that the woman she’d been expecting after hearing  Jim’s story was completely different to the one whose hand she’d just shaken, and it was no fault of his. She was the one that had conjured up some cruel, selfish vixen, but Yvonne seemed nice, quiet and shy, and from just their first interaction, Y/n could tell that she might be a little like Jim. Maybe, besides the boredom and turmoil in their respective marriages, that was what had connected them. “This is the woman you told me you were seeing, when we met for dinner?” She asked innocently, glancing at Jim.

Y/n’s eyes went wide and she too regarded Jim. “Er, no,” he chuckled nervously, “That was Orla,” he smiled tightly, “We broke up a couple months after that,” he informed softly, “That was last year,” he smiled to Y/n, “About eight months before we met.”

“Oh, my mistake!” The woman one had to her chest and Y/n exhaled audibly upon realizing that she’d been the confused one- for a minute, she thought he’d been meeting with Yvonne while they were together. “Well it's so nice to meet you Y/n, you’ve got a good one,” she teased lightly. 

“I know,” Y/n laughed too, still a little tense about the whole thing but quickly deciding that she had nothing to worry about, she trusted Jim. 

Next to her, Jim chuckled too, the sound was soft and bashful, “Uh, Yvonne was just telling me that her daughter is interested in Trinity’s Chemical Science’s program, so they did a tour of the campus today.”

“That’s amazing!” Y/n quipped brightly, “Trinity has been great for me, I’m sure she’ll love it here,” she added without thinking.

Yvonne knitted her brows and tilted her head slightly, “You’re a student?” She probed curiously. 

Realizing what she’d said, Y/n attempted to hide her surprise and stuttered, only for Jim to swoop in and attempt to save face, “We work together,” he interjected, squeezing her hip reassuringly. It wasn’t a complete lie just….a safer version of the truth.

“Oh, right,” Yvonne waved her hand casually, “You just look so young,” she added and they all chortled softly, though, for Jim and Y/n it was a bit awkward and forced. As their laughter quieted down, Jim and Yvonne fell into easy conversation once more. With her lips caught between her teeth, Y/n lingered there as they caught up, trading anecdotes about their children, sharing little bits of information about mutual friends and updates on their lives. They went on for a while, seemingly oblivious to her presence and as they carried on and at some point, Jim’s hand fell from her waist, slipping into the pockets of his jeans. Even having not seen each in over a year, Yvonne and Jim were perfectly familiar, if she were on the outside of the situation and hadn’t known them, she might have suspected that Yvonne and Jim were the couple and she was the third wheel. And with that thought,  Y/n let her mind wander to another; 

Was she the right person for him?

Mid November  One would have suspected that Jim would have learned the first time around, but he hadn’t, not really. Maybe he was just an idiot. He couldn’t believe he’d let something like that happen, he should have pulled away, he should have suggested that they not have anymore wine, he shouldn’t have gone to dinner with Yvonne in the first place. Not after Y/n had told him she didn’t feel like going because she had another headache. He should have stayed with her, like a good boyfriend. But he’d gone to dinner with Yvonne, as they’d planned a week earlier. It was really supposed to be the three of them, but when Y/n had said she wasn’t feeling up to it, she’d told him to go ahead without her, that she’d be fine on her own and was planning to sleep it off anyway. And so, he’d gone alone, well, alone with Yvonne. 

Everything had been going well for the most part, but by the end of the night, Yvonne had started talking about how her youngest was about to start university and she was dreading being home alone, without her kids. She’d also said that even though she’d been dating around since her husband had passed, no one had made her feel the way Jim had when they’d been sneaking around. By the end of the night, she’d had way more wine than he had and Jim didn’t think it would have been very responsible of him to let her take a cab or the bus, so he’d offered to drive her home. The ride back to her place had been pleasurably uneventful when they’d stopped in front of her place though, she’d leaned over the console and Jim had been convinced that she’d been going in for a hug. 

She’d kissed him instead. 

"She's too young for you, don't you think?"

"No," he'd chuckled nervously, "She's-" and just like that, her lips, soft and stained with wine, were on his.

“Well,” Y/n folded her arms, standing past the kitchen counter, the granite acting as the only physical barrier between them. "Did you kiss her back?"

"It doesn't matter," Jim reasoned, walking around the counter, only for Y/n to hastily move away, evading his touch. 

"What the hell do you mean "it doesn't matter"?" She retorted incredulously, "And frankly you saying that is answer enough," Y/n's voice broke and Jim felt his heart chip; he'd never seen her cry, emotional sure, but never in tears and he hated that he was the reason for them.

"It didn't even last-"

"So you did!" Y/n turned her face away as she put her hands to her lip, “Oh my God,” even if Jim couldn’t see her, he could hear Y/n’s soft sobs and they only served to shatter his already broken heart; he couldn’t believe he’d done that to her. The kiss hadn’t even lasted very long, Jim had pushed Yvonne away from the minute he’d realized himself, and despite her less than credible state, Yvonne had taken the visible disappointment in stride; walking up to the front door, only offering one halfhearted wave before heading inside. 

But he’d still done it. Even if kissing another woman had proven what Jim knew to be true- that he didn’t ever want to kiss another pair of lips but Y/n’s- it couldn’t be justified. He’d hurt another woman he loved. 

“Y/n,’ Jim reasoned desperately, “I swear to you, it doesn’t mean anything.-”

“Yes it does!” She yelled, pitifully hoarse, “Do you wanna be with her? Is that it?” She heaved mournfully. 

“No, no, definitely not,” he returned hurriedly, hoping Y/n would find truth in his urgency, “I want you, just you.”

“Then why did you kiss her back?” When Y/n looked at him, her lashes were wet with tears, her eyes were red and her face was blotchy. Closing his fists at his sides, the gesture a firm reminder to himself to not reach out and touch her until she was ready, Jim stood a couple feet away, stunned and speechless. He didn’t have an answer, not really, not above ‘muscle memory.’ Because that was what it had been to him, muscle memory.

When he didn’t respond, Y/n scoffed mournfully, “God,” she sniffed, starting to cry again, “I can’t even look at you right now.” Hastily, she collected her handbag and coat, hurrying towards the door, and like a puppy scared to see its favorite person leave, he followed her. 

“Y/n, please don’t go. It’s late,” he began, anxiously reaching for anything that would make her stay, “Please sweetheart, lets talk about this.”

“No!” She yelled, just as she wretched the door open, “I don’t wanna talk to you, I don’t even want to see you right now. So just,” she shook her shoulder dramatically as salty tears raced down her cheeks, “Leave me alone.”

And with that, she turned on her heel and left, leaving Jim defeated and wishing that he could hit reset on the past week or so. 

*****

Tagging- @pearlstiare

#cillian murphy #cillian murphy x reader #cillian murphy x y/n #the delinquent season #cillian murphy fanfic #jim x reader #mr. gallagher and me

[libidomechanica]

Such as I to

A curtal sonnet sequence

               1

Boiling sprites did thither they were met by my own; and suddenly, with joy the beauty-crest of sisters, some among, the whisper often come, to chase fatigue is flowing hair. Such as I to take way longer envying their feet in flower wine she drank: her faire cold wipers along the stream that crawled like a cavern springs the crimson rose, how sweet a sleeping from a sick dove. Therefore wilt thou sire of those sugred lips.

               2

Perfect too: perfect music and louing lay apart as sacred sward last eve, and such a mother and began to moan, but fettered limbs go lame! But stream, across the whole weak race of a day that every careless cloud that runs through, many a year my pipe is never dies! With bars lest Christabel And who art thou sinn’d in aught offensive tendance in this dull and cloudy, even while I past him, I was forst from the bridegroom fair.

               3

I built his bow he bent, for, nor despise. Again the weeping, eye-earnestly, through clear and clodded earth gives it and dote upon the brine. Therefore, was just going; when, behold our sanctuary violate, our laws are kissings worth, if thou kiss not me? She said; she wept, I am aweary, aweary, I would race with me oft she sat: the dew had taken fairy phantasies to strain the fabric of mi skirt, just so.

               4

In bitter look, some will spare, an’ wilfu’ folk maun hae their death, where there ever issues forth a steady splendour; but at this moment, they moved. Again the weeping. Broad leaved fig trees it struck, and, plashing blue movies from thee going by would watch. May hap I love all human kind. Revel may survey our rustic dance wi’ scorn; but my kisses rain on my lips and changes like light! Now ’tis tatter’d; leaving us fancy-sick.

               5

No sighs but sigh-warm kisses, ere this, is come cold wipers along the thrushes, and his step, and drive from beneath the happy threshold of the personality of the inhuman dearth of noble end, and blushing face; she loved, and so he had authority direct! See the moon in pieces of my soul, we must give whate’er these the broken system made no purple throat skewered like a child there was only one alive?

               6

Silent; but pain clings cruelly to us, that lay beside us, Cyril, battered the next day she asked: Melchior? She said; she said; she said, Art thou go? She said brokenly, that soon he rose and free home to her place, disdained, right? Enough to play hard or play at all. As the birth, or wealth, because of this the trees bring again. Thus truly, when thy trains my younger and yours shall ever be. Happy sleep. And like a split broiler.

               7

Yet I am not the lassie be; weel ken I my ain lassie, fair tho, the last gasp comes peace to everything here, half an hour in each of you and me, curled like two grubs on the slippery rocks, and daws, and the third day the Chaplain would sooner than a partridge. My little shallop, floating cloud than your horses’ echoing feet! And all men kill the baskets. Tell his footsteps trod the unclean leper’s house one unbecoming her.

               8

And state, this Present, thou, and beauty born of murmuring of innumerable bees. For whether moved beyond the roses to-night, alone, which ours we call. Air; and all his owne liuely forme in rudest braine. Nor find him; by the happy pens whither then incline, and we all should hear the city’s din; now while the earth in the blossoms with trembling, hidden, laughing loud, he flew away, and try its worth: here dies another’s hall.

               9

Through copse-clad vallies where we withdrew from his voiceless grave: they have gone, she knew she could so preposterously the secret that I have ever thought I could not pass in storm we had crossed the hymns, and clay endure. Are not our wide plains where fed the hangman’s snare strangle with thee the Lityerses- song against some deer-herd bent, sacred to Dian? And whole; should see I know not how, but shuddered, she unbound their voices called The Witch.

               10

She moved, and clay endure. And can wipe out blood, and the lady Geraldine! And what was all. Caressed by the sweet Stellas name. Therefore sully the entrusted gem of high and noble life with their contrary to kind: false love, desire, they this the cell; sir Leoline; softly gathering lights, going to Spain and insult to his waist. Or red with countless fleeces? Sir Leoline. Come away, come thou would be enough, you are they.

               11

From hunting with a daughter mild made answer, troubles, anxieties, and stranger, I will be my rival, though even it, purpled, spiking away, wants to be a good look that hour with the other unguess’d offices, like creature reign’d all frailties that doth Phoebus’ light! And the world’s dusky brink. Such gloom, and nothingness; but still will keep a lamb strayed far a-down those icy chains across the daffodils with the old oak tree!

               12

And by each let this one is which. For such as I to take in draught of the world-without- end hour whilst eyes that do still live on through which to feed her large bright-eyed Eulalie upturns her matron Night uptook her ebon urn, young Mercury, by stealth, and we shall haunt you! We banged the doors: to the exhausted, driven out of long frustration of the Keyes betrayed, and lay down by the sweet and faintest sighs, that, when once we goe a Maying.

               13

Made for me. Everything I’ve read, the poor of God, or for the world was like a spark that never could end the pearliest dew not brings his Sicilian shepherds sang to Proserpine, among whose chin was, in fact, stained within my grasp, that I be call’d to taste sometime she will die somewhat, again and rage, his cheeks so shallow too, as to show her tongueless crocodile. He does not counted fair Geraldine nor speak to the truth.

               14

To drink a draught within, and dipt again, thou lovely maid and sees a damsel bright, my dazzled soul, but hurriedly they told me all so often that fine air I trembled as he can! I sat contemplating the way, young damsels danced along, bearing the shaft, and the bitter wine she drank the sun is setting of this pleasant is thine, the fingers push the feather in the gray- eyed morn about thee ring, hear us, great Pope’s sight?

               15

And angels’ purity, ‘twixt women’s love! In this dull and struggle having a white! Each matin bell, the working out. Of salt, and still the babe restored; nor thought to sink, was caught my waking ears, and up I started up, and sleep in love’s lips a-glow! The chuckling linnet its five young. No doubt, she had failed in sweetness only due to the overgrowth at his feet beneath him, and thy breast and quiet scene; the memory they brim.

               16

I know how long its happy, honest, stay and thy years hence my eyes show it. Lengthened on the roofs like the knight Pinto—Mendez Ferdinando—still form a synonym for Truth—Cease trying! She flees away, her fear plants many a green-gown has been sent messenger came back to me. And in it lies? To her; for her thighs caressed by the tide; the old age; dishonoured by his dishonored grave: nor mark it with thee of yore, thyrsis!

               17

God gave for baptism, I am forsaken; a torment from my ears but attend, instead, to the stars are strewn—so have I answered thee? Heart’s flame kindles red. The brave man with his breast. At every drifting: yet my higher bard than simple as that had riven his fainting recollections. Of fright in what the old stone bridge.—And dream and all that we see, get up, sweet-Slug-a- bed, and always death. What it might not go free, ah!

               18

By barn in threshing-time shoot: but grim to see the pipe is lost, my shepherd’s phrase, will woo: the courtiers’ gems may witness’d in the grass, uncared for, spied its memory they brim. Dispensing harvest, or the rich to-come reels, as they moving caught a glimpse of his soul was resolute, and mused and saw such dreadful leisure of weary days, moves with lightens in his hard-mailed hands, who turned each listening cell, and lang has had my day.

               19

Or used to do. Adorn beauty’s grace, that if they be harm’d, said he, all flushed you safe and fearful to alight from stumbling over his small eye blinks dull and trees do lean all round ears, which is also a pauper. Thus to a dying tones, yet swelled the dew- slick grass, a wailful gnat, a bee bustling among seer leaves will buy me sheep and kye, he has nae love these twain, upon the radio comes clear—neither milk-white thighs, when they fled?

               20

Melts downe his lead into their hearts can mend; all tongues that mine eye saith true, and trying to get out. Only the twelve hours, and she doth lie, made more by looking on my bliss—I was distracted; madly did I dream, be perfectly completions—be quicklime on the Dew-locks of the lies turning thoughts to see? Must sentence pass, things done, that know not how, in fear, needing you as Ra knew the Dorian shepherd, in the winds are wooing wind!

               21

For ever: but howso’er fixed in your likes. We tell begin now while the lie, till the gallows’ need: so with rolling so as scarce alive. In the moment lies with its ode inside, a troop of little like tears followed, and sorrow? Astonished, dear. Erect and nothingness; but still were in a bed of roses, almost crashed, they, weeping fit; or upward ragged brows bushes and thine are so harsh, heart-wearying roar, let in the sky?

               22

The Prince. This, I was a child there was no grave at all: only a biochemical or two keeps me from behind me whisper from the bride in the longest break in your lit harvest, sowing the way by now just from Stella euer deere, stella, whose patient watch over the might be moved, and due to the end, melting into plastic circumstance, this sowre-breath’d mate taste of thine, and I never say that do you become a papa!

               23

The fresh budding Boy, or Girle, this seed, this wretched forth the door is pitiless and impulse: and with darkness grope: we did not heed the same, as might die. What song to sigh; and yet it cannot keep my heart that more of a new lover hie, laugh o’er the cottage sings: for Nature and the typing of the gate, he came with death, whose manger makes her in her mind an hour in each, and all male minds of blood to their love when youthful Thames?

               24

The snowy-banded, dilettante, delicate amber; and the matron eye—while ever to mine own brothers maim. Then falling, think which way to walk forlorn, till cold wipers along the small, slight what men they are old; some say, for proffer, lastly gave me the thing here so stunn’d and smooth! The Warder is Despair: he only looked askance at Christabel: all our household ways, not perfect I call his owne liuely forme in rudest braine.

               25

She past on; but each assumed from this sad life closes with its adder-bitten root, and heap’d a spire of teeming sweets, enkindling sacred to Dian? Called and something, what armour to indue. Which of Them it could nothing all objects to his palate doth proue; bidden, perhaps spin straw into gold. From the grey downs dulled to sleep, protected by her side—a sight to dream of, not to be marked by the park to practice an angel’s feet.

               26

Or, it may hap “cuckoo; cuckoo, cuckoo! The same; the leaves his house with all the soft babe in arm: there is the stroked my cries with man who looked with saints. She offered him all these harms, their arms were sated with lots of tape delays and look’d for? You and younger even. But when that I speak, nor move, nor e’er concentrate on the grave,? The mother, the maker of the world and wave, to meet his lips, and slowly twins emerged. Each tongue is mute.

               27

Hath she thin gray cloud is gray: tis a monsters and the staring eyes, with blush and I’ll professes, and sidelong glances at my feet hath led me—who knows how? Mother is pure invention the maps they pass the Baron rich, hath a toothless mastiff bitch? With clear away the palace floors, and soon it lightly dipt, and there sped a troop of little bent; and if from shepherd-god. Devotion gives each House a Bough, I can seem but slow?

     ��         28

That thou declare all that she could never lost, therefore, ’tis with thee. Sixty years hence, though thou her guardian spirit works out, this is what I hate those amongst us all who walked at these late showers as moisture breeds the pipy hemlock to stray he knew, which like the gnawing sloth on the touch of a vanish’d hand, at the rabid wolf whose precious time at the old oak tree! A noise of songs thine heart, would I spur, though by the day.

               29

Each matin bell, the world, I love you, holy Christabel, my father charms my very saul, the kingdom but he drank: her fair large eyes gan glitter bright, drawn after you’ve risen. And the bitter lot that God’s eternal spring, when proud-pied April dress’d in all men%u2019s souls for a lady’s lively shining rails: and, rank by rank, we soaped the world and alone. The space between;— but neither milk-white, of mingled bubblings and neck.

               30

Their steps they gave us were on his arm is with the dove to take way longer, I wish it gentle as freedom of the valley road. You will not, while we may could life return, twould never heard! But it is not wrong. Now while time left to me this head, and drinks it up: mine eye and hanging day; love stays forever like a broken sheds look’d for? Lifted her up, as in a tomb. The first Man took his brother ran in his eyelids pale.

               31

I know you stand stiff as Lot’s wife, and loud to Lord Roland de Vaux of Tryermaine. Gained the dead. But this heath, this caprice; and as old Falstaf says let us e’en talk a little thing he loves by each side a Warder dared to overlean a finger lighted Troth, and right, and they heard a noise of songs thine height to the dooms we have left to dream that creeps windingly by it, so the quilts, crooning, closer—one day you realize it.

               32

For term of life that hill where smiling bright ’neath master-hands, from them, palaces and tower, tu—whoo! Sleep o’er-power’d me in midst of all, the burning wind, never weep, never saw a man who looked on the day either I loved, wants to carry me away, come sweet side o’ the Yarrow, and fair; but love, let us type them now in our own. A hundred years should rob the phantoms of a lost lover—all, all upon the cool depth.

               33

Something to me; but blythe’s the blind men can also see. Then the year behind the type of silence prayeth she. Each helped us at our parting cry, from the web of gloom crept till dawn at the sky. ’ Bud, yet lost ere that waits for Sin had caught up into one ball, and last, to these, the brethren of our language—and sweet is the gallows’ need: so with rolling eyes: and with thy hand, and pretty at each man does not pray with precision hooves.

               34

To wash her, water for my state: and, since I came with his blood, and valley-lilies whiter blow. The woods with thine are sealed: I strove, made head, while the lies our clod; nearer we hold Thee just, strike twelve hours between sorrow and sorry season is over now! Are like a mirror on a string, except it be at peace—this wretched over it awkward flair rare steaks, onion rings, Maker’s on the flowers have traded life beats in my arms.

               35

Huge dens and caverns in a mountain of immortal drink, and distorted therewithal: be she likewise one of us would ease me of my tongue was the maidens came, the crowd. Nay but the Heads of the heart beating still above the bodiless dead espy? They glided past, they measure the space of a swallows and lives? Doubt the man who looked with a bitter, deathly ache; till old days, jovial and the sky not falling stars.

               36

Eyes scintillating soul transpires at every tongue says beauty a’ the night-fowl crow: the country and laid them out; but thou always when it’s dead I will colors coincide in white. Our moment have we stept into a river burns inside the man who left me, some love holds her helpless breaks with man who left me in earth, which is my boast, and when true love of things by a law divine in one another’s hall. And makes me thence?

               37

Then let me shun such follying before them from men’s reverend beard of grisly twine, all my woes I wrate; stella, food of my heart like a stream that never will buy me rigs o’ land, and sweet is the key. Catkins of your ideograms, how only a stretch to touch her babe; but she nuh notice him also carry gun? A live heart of strength, thy golden brede, lay like one in the matted turf he kept, again and wings of humanity.

               38

And take the rose! Like a linty, raw-cold dust disturbed from the gaps and sick surmise, they only swelled the hall, when noon is past; to sit with my brethren lay; there is one to pick juicy rubies, whose fair charities joined at her side of sheaves when last the hot cornfield of thee cannot be staid with the lawn, the cable whispered lowly, how dark the dreaming. Instinct now are peering eyes scintillating soul, there lay a boar- spear keen.

               39

Everything is strangely alas Nights side the last line of your strange ministries of female hands our forehead, with her dread, and now in happier times; but yet with nimble feet to dance its body, and real the changing so high, on the greasy Joan doth keel the pot. Cheek is cold, thy prison that dimmed her broke a genial warmth and sky. Is pitiless and the ward to the lady wiped her moist cold brow, and still renewable fear.

               40

His messenger came back down thy nature. Ask me no more amongst the Trial Men in a suit of shame the Herald came to do the sea and came back upon him with the buffeting north that balances the head, gained ground upon their behoof, whose grace may be my love’s milky brow! Or else he mighty Mother doth not see within her—let her make her hands found made: so, better, age, exempt from strife, should have broken and a’ his gear.

               41

Devouring Time, blunt thou this store: so then I am sometimes was my early exposure to Frankenstein! What use to keep in its resolved course. My offence is more awful shine from the horn, when the dwarf took pity. That was, became like a broken purpose while some did bring, to wash her, water for thee! Of a great krater-cup bearing the mountain air; and all the torrent dance to flutes, to dance thee die! Sleep will not wait?

               42

Than think to win. And now my wrist is naked. These were the flood of them my life hath eyes so innocent and pictorial. My spouse Nancy? Thy power to bid thee feeble, all the wide in times within she sees a great bronze valves, and with the wrong. The lovely handsome, the woods! Were we not friend and sorrows more than that pretty Face? The first thine enmossed realms: O thou, the solid ground upon my brow nay! Full in the Rust Belt.

               43

I am your dwarf. Have; then ten time; down each grated screen, and never could endure to brood so lately claspt with young Love upon a hearse: and the big kids make the boy walks to the sea inside its now, its halved pit unfleshed—what was better, youth should I forget all thy numerous array and take the earth is glad: the mere commingling keys opened the house with so dead and pale violence with force and found fair peace once more.

               44

Had entered into a peach. The lady rose again, seals of love, and call her nerves, each muscle and forth thou heard’st a low moaning wind went wandering if the Babe is born a boy he’s given to a close, ne’er to wake thou wert, I came, some good survivor with aught else can our searching witness’d in their arms, seems to smile as infants at a sudden silence and shady grove, and sin no more: at which in thy jocund youthful Thames?

               45

—And here I bid it die. Be near her still. And as a vapour, or a drop of manna- dew, full palatable; and all the Quarters of emotional importance please address these question of the gate that which her voice slow and green Thirst that same night shall poor Sylvander hie; depriv’d of the herd that holds the listening, as thought, with a tender hands she dabbles, on the wild lean- headed Eagles yelp alone, I marry the bed.

               46

With midnight I’ll pluck you a wreath of unseen among us, willing sea, in distant shore, where it lies? We’re out in a country maid. A rose leaf round thy base, no longer than see it. Rare steaks, onion rings, Maker’s on the radio comes clear—neither of the carpet tonight and no child will ever call me Papa. Is too stern. Then the lark was lost in the afternoon the sea and the beaded-curtain up some wood- nymph’s home.

               47

And when she told her: As I came with my night vision straining too hard to make him mad, nor does Terror crept. Petal by petal, now they pass the Baron’s heart and free of space. He knew that he was a man! The thoughts abide. We trod the upper sky, do love you, or such as fancies grew. Head, but in the deed off, calls the herd that holds a state was drawn of tiffanie or cobweb lawn. And out of bed? Who is my sin and not for you!

               48

There: for flower to make me any summer’s sky, or purged air, as fast asleep, then tell my love can dawn in warmth and sky. Clarinda, mistress’ eyes—to lie on a white! That only this—a living thing when it alteration finds no end, a raging cloud that parly all times she never hold, this mutual kiss drop down between sorrow the ways—or shrink to a phrase like an arrow for my voyage prepar’d with homely hands.

               49

But when Sicilian shepherds with as inconstant stars, in the shore, so that a shadow fell on me; yet firme love that green fruitful seventyfold. For she that once and shady grove, and can with tendrils love even, as an artichoke but that I may dare to mount the way appears, white thighs, when turtles tread, and all at the rabid wolf where soft and mild, as a mother dear mother’s grief, and at every tree, mocks married ear!

               50

Just as we reap in joy the bed she did say: in the teeth of winter night—did you know by now just from Stella euer deere, stella, whose eyes, and we not friends from small, the shivering airs they starve the land, for this we gave our palace roof doth hang from jagged trunks, and dewy buds, and sped And twilight in though soon thy foot resumed its wandering mother! Betrays me back with a sweet peas, I must be meek! One day you realize it.

               51

And beauty treble; and then were gulph’d in a tumultuous swim: and the cuckoo then, on every sport of healing, glanced about to have golden honeycombs; our village street its haunted; I had forgotten time; down each grated screen, and thunder, rain and againe: while all delights be in Thy hand! And the seed its hand, and not then use rigor in my seeing either sex alone is half itself through sunny meadow and shame!

               52

The cankering venom, that held them up, gotten loose from danger, free from thee going away, with ever-after, all, all upon the blink o’ him I wad na gie for Buskie-glen, fu’ is his door. Swell to melting into its airy swelling its account the pangs of her own betrothèd knights maimed, the tended Florian: with her powerful army. It’s more like middle earth had faded: deepest shades were full of grief and scorn.

               53

Them, and a flute’s speech. The doctors chart the chamber shut from the fierce disdaine hath got them, from the eagle’s maw; or by mysterious succession of the Sultán how high! A certain what they, who thought in lead, move right color is invisible strings and presently, the sad death of unseen Power that waits for the fountain, my church the tallest of the carpet tonight and blood and fiery heats, fainting recollections.

               54

On the blink o’ Robie’s e’e, and wave, to meet his lips, and daws, and trouble in his arms he took fair Geraldine! Day long shines, bright beams arise! Life’s self is nourished up, tenderness and have strown it, and are as suddenly, sweetly; i’ll win thee ’gainst the hot season; the middle of the most was once our only Hope to be, and in the absent from the wet grass and still with gems and gold which to the same as pillow to thy head.

               55

Many a tingle on the vulgar mass called work, must sentence pass, things done, that all the eye that know not how, in fear, needing you as Ra knew that soon he rose to weep. Mincing steps of thy repose, till the baskets start back. And the sullen day had chidden herald Hesperus away, her fear plants many a verse I hope to write, while she spake, her lover, can’st thou wouldst give golden morning blown; no one knows I don’t believe it.

               56

For ’twas too much the sons of men who through open fi mi if I shift mi hips to stretch out like to spree. A son was born. Only later did it become a cheering lights, going to Spain and insult to his heart, and God stand in his eyes with mingled with thy glory live. Youthful Lord of Death with icy breath had entered in the vine; nor cared nor knew what he learnt a stormy note of men contentedly, and each wore a mask.

               57

Young couple’s weight,—peona guiding, through its little roof of glass; he does not know of the wooing voice, his grace and loathsome slime, and bound with what life I had, and not a man who looked at the Oppian Law. Gracious household ways, not perfect face; the bosom old, again I look’d, and, O ye deities, who from Olympus watch over the face, struck for him; to a boon southern country he is flowing, dwelt full on the floor below.

               58

Then all her sex, has blest my glorious nothing since has floated in that which it couched, in silence harms.—The Champak odours fail like sweet though, if I say I shall try that look of the river it is perfect strain o’ the Mill was brown before me as the twilight, the childhood? But ’twas love, how frank, how could I spur, though by choices that brings desire of perfect enough to tortured her moist cold brow, and wildly fancy plays.

               59

The moan of doves in immemorial elms, and fix itself embalms: but if we love thy heart denies, oh, in pity hide those experiments on animals; you are shepherd blows his nail, and Tom bears, on whose hearts as lightly as you will die somewhat, against his brother’s laps and kye, he has crossed their comfortings, are given to hide the lashes bright! About Ferguson, deceived and jealous thou art why should rob the prince.

               60

Kept up a shrilly mellow reeds and blossom wavering round the sea. With slouch and pain You are not worthy such a dream, sweet Love were soft and loved the roses of your great plans: yet was she but a girl as much brighter drops that blessedness. When I saw and when the languid fool, who was gaping and arrow, and relax Pluto’s brow, and the mastiff bitch? Light in the furrows of his heart of every morningless and desire!

               61

Than Leda’s love, the oracle of lies. The lamp the lady rose again, ev’ry thy hair all unconscious did thither there, and then he rose in fearful ewes; and we are mended, or when my one chances in the mere commingling keys opened the door is pitiless and impulse: and without, finished: but let it serve this station in the deeps, a wall of night than the sacred vestments swept. Greek from Syria, or a stone bridge.

               62

Quiet we sat and dumb: but each others the silver bugle, and said: please approach and saves the chambers, and we not see’t? And the dreams that raw and ancient art while people for weeping from the heights of the world would moue; if he be faire, yet but a dream, and he turned to help their ears were shatter’d thro’ the regions be his messengers through the earth in the brown hair sprent with spicy chocolates tempers my ways of thee: but finding note.

               63

Ever call me Papa. Most terrible and the boy who shall have had great bounty from Endymion pine away! Sweet beauty’s height to the signal-elm, that had riven his fainting recollection. When my hairs be grey; set me in base, or yet in her breasts! I know then why your bed will say no. About coming the self-same day with all confusion there. And why with her eyes; amazed they glared upon the earth in the birken shaw.

               64

My spear aloft, the thrushes, and perfume. And Memory wakes the sky. Like Orpheus, from instrument, and the wind; stranger, mislaid love, I will sleepwalk all night not for these moment cuts the deed off, calls the threshold, he, or hand in wild delirium, gripe it hard, and said in courtly accents fine, sweet maid, hae I offended? Weaves rainbows o’er yon mountain height the shepherds pipe on oaten straws, ever lonely moated grange.

               65

Strike twelve hours between us for the Lord, and slowly from the web of gloom crept till each thread was Hope. The Princely giver, who hast brought rest to his station in the vale! All chaff of custom, Gama said: the snow, his pinions shook; or, it may be, or your Gowne, or Haire: I fear the roof, the slow clock ticking, and once we crouched in haste; use pleasure lives were guilty beetle is a frightening thirst that man’s face was white o’er the change, in sleep.

               66

Though the hideous shed. Fable, song, or fleeting shade. For thou art gone as well! A night of healing, glanced behind ye: yet, trust me, I shall weigh the summer’s sky, or purged air, tu-who; tu-whit, tu-who! And thine own influence, thrown in our necks, we vanquished, you the heavens fall in a gentle lispers may sigh my love? Which, labouring for the lady of a far countrèe. I doubt he is not wind enough, and clos’d her hand, she weeps: sdeath!

               67

Poetry house it’s not peace in happier air, wandering crew; tis not in the first with my own steed from being cruel, my heart died to keep. And feeble, all uncurl’d: pr’ythee quit this ardent listlessness: for I have told their voices called the girl to vex true hearted was he, the straw into gold or she would gaze at the fullnesse of my thought comfort or console: and we are in our annals, and stiles, over the wide world again.

               68

Spirit pouring thy presence into all: the thunder, when she got too far. When all hell will yet be there, and talk of all things as cold earth-wanderers never sown; this Child I to myself when the best you could be in NY for a favoured youth, nor let the drowsy wing a triple hour, but renovates and lives? I will hold out the person whose hat you are how happy you make the harp-string, if they slander’d till I die.

               69

And the riddle they ask of me and I turn my head became like a ghost she loathed? My tongue says beauty is a joy for ever open is his doom. Ask me no more, but let us type them not; more such a wistfully at the further end was Ida by the blast—quick gathering up her train, that o’er her eyes; amazed they glared upon the outside and hymns in the sweet herbs that seem to keep one oath, must lose one joy, folioed.

               70

Great bounty from Endymion pine away! A prison roof confines thee thou art as a dove would often beat its wings and placing a rumpled crimson petal, fall on that airy trance stumblings down some monstrous precipices flit to save poor lambkins from the grief without all wind and broader- grown yew tree, for a river, clear, brimful, and main lifted her eyes appeare; I sawe that sickening sleep has ended. For thee this I sing.

               71

On whose throat may thy mother is your morning stars do I my judgment too. We have seen the hare I saw a bright lady, surpassingly fair; and did curse the disappeared to incense was sparkling spires, she needs must I lose the child of deceit, a gilded hook that hour with the scented eglantine gave temperate sweets to that seat of grace.—Just ere she kissed it: then—all good go with thine? She came within a little blazes.

               72

Within the hot cornfield of the perfect enough for a look, or heart is resting beneath the hangman, with the blue-tick coated Philomel, and tears upon me taks pity, i’ll do my endeavour to follow it upon the silent fingering a watch whose luminous eyes, and the fetid breath! Who, suddenly, should not see’t? That when our side was vanquished, you the heart’s best brother; and often feeling suddenly dismayed.

               73

Drag inward from Sunne, thou shalt do! Till it begins to progressing tongues—and out of memories of time all chaff of custom, Gama said: the snow-pale prince. Becomes his dwelling-place for ever: its loveliness. In highest way of error, a temple becomes his dwelling-place and garden and its winding through the Wytham flats, red loose or used to bite the maid and meaner beautiful to see, like angry words you might mean.

#poetry #automatically generated text #Patrick Mooney #Markov chains #Markov chain length: 8 #179 texts #curtal sonnet sequence

[denimchicken]

shouldn't have listened to a break up song bc now im spiralling

#the thought of not being with my bf one day makes me feel sick #only had one long term relationship before and I ended it so it rly didn't bother me #I'd just... die without jake #we split for a little but i just drank the pain away #I'd drink myself to death if we split for good #bs

[starryhyuck]

limit. (m)

pairing: gryffindor!mark x reader

words: 3.4k+

summary: with gryffindor on a continuous losing streak, you have no choice but to push your quidditch player boyfriend to his breaking point.

genre: smut

warnings: public sex, overstimulation, squirting, oral sex, degradation, daddy kink, face slapping

“If you keep pushing him, he’ll snap.”

“That’s what I’m hoping for.”

You observe Mark across the Great Hall, fingers clenched tightly around his spoon. The other Gryffindor seated beside him are eyeing him warily, afraid the resident happy Head Boy was slowly losing his mind.

This, of course, is partly due to you.

You’ve refused to give Mark an orgasm until Gryffindor wins a Quidditch match, which has effectively been very hard since the team has been on a losing streak. You and Mark aren’t animals, per se, but the two of you fucked regularly and the fact that he hasn’t gotten the chance to touch you in weeks is taking a toll on him.

Lucas swings an arm around his shoulder and whispers something to him, but Mark’s eyes are locked in on you. You could almost feel the magic radiating off of his form. You smile deviously, arm reaching to wrap around Donghyuck’s, who gladly accepts your touch. Luckily, Donghyuck enjoys pushing Mark’s buttons almost as much as you do.

Donghyuck’s in the middle of feeding you a bite of his chicken when all of the glasses in the Great Hall shatter. A jumbled murmur of shrieks and gasps of surprise echo at the performance of wandless magic. Students whip their heads around, frantically trying to find the source of the fiasco. You already know who the culprit is, watching as Mark stomps out of the Great Hall, fists clenched tightly.

—

Donghyuck snickers beside you.

“You’re really asking for it. Wearing Slytherin gear and sitting with the snakes? He’s going to ruin you.”

You roll your eyes, brushing off his comment and adjusting the green tie wrapped around your neck. You briefly lock eyes with your irate boyfriend, who is currently on the Quidditch pitch, waiting for the match to begin. You smile and wave at him innocently, only to receive the nastiest look in return.

Donghyuck laughs again at the exchange. “I’ve never seen Mark look like that. Are you sure you’re ready for the consequences?”

You grin as the game begins, the cheering sounds from the Slytherin stands almost drowning out your voice.

“He needs a little push. Gryffindor has lost three games in a row already.”

You prove Donghyuck right a hour into the game. Mark has been scoring goal after goal since the match started. Slytherin’s Keeper tries to block every single throw, but Mark is clearly on a mission, showing no mercy to the Slytherin house. He almost looks like he would Avada someone on the spot just to win.

Every time he scores, he makes a point to look straight at you before zooming off. You smirk to yourself, already feeling your panties dampen at the sight. One part of you is slightly afraid of what Mark will do to you once Gryffindor wins. The other part of you is unabashedly excited.

The Slytherins around you groan and complain as Mark continuously scores. Donghyuck is enjoying the show, knowing you’re truly in for it later after seeing the murderous look painted on Mark’s face.

The game ends after two hours, with the Gryffindor Seeker securing the Snitch and winning the match. The sea of red erupts in a roar of applause and cheers, while the Slytherins grumble and curse their luck. It was the first loss of the season for the Slytherins, and they could all thank your boyfriend for that.

Usually, when Mark wins a game, you would wait outside the locker rooms and congratulate him with a kiss. This time, you want to make him work for it a little more.

Donghyuck chuckles when he sees you turn the opposite direction of the locker rooms.

“You’re in for it now.”

—

You’re laughing at something Doyeon’s telling you when you feel the abrupt tug on your arm. You hiss at the contact, ready to hex whoever it is. Realization seeps within you when you see the look of fury on Mark’s face as he tugs you away from your friends.

“I’ll see you guys later!” You call out, already feeling the slick of your wetness coating your thighs.

“Okay! Great game, Mark!”

The Gryffindor boy doesn’t even thank them, pulling open the door to the empty Potions classroom and shoving you inside. You put on your innocent persona.

“That wasn’t very nice. I was having an interesting conversation with Doyeon, if you must know.”

“On the desk. Now.”

The anger laced in his tone has your body vibrating. You decide to push him even further, frowning and clutching your books tighter to your chest. You still have Donghyuck’s Slytherin scarf wrapped around you, which Mark is heavily glaring at.

“I don’t even get a please? Where are your manners, Mark?”

You gasp when he steps forward, fingers bunching around the locks of your hair and pulling. Hard.

“You think this is so funny, don’t you? Watching me fall apart, breaking all the glasses in the Great Hall and receiving detention for it? How about wanting to injure someone on the field just so we could win? Just so I can come back to you, fuck you so hard your tight cunt stretches out.” His fingers grip the fabric of your skirt and he growls. You swear you can feel your juices start running down the inside of your thigh with how wet you are. “And what about this? This stupid fucking little skirt. You think you could get away with that too?”

You placed a charm on your clothing early this morning, making your button-up shirt just a little tighter around your chest and your skirt a little shorter than normal. You smile and try to raise your chin as much as possible, struggling as Mark continues to pull your hair.

“Daddy likes it? I did it just for you. Just so Daddy could win today.”

Mark’s eyes are the darkest they have ever been, and you try not to glance down at his trousers, which are probably straining from his growing erection. You only play the Daddy card once or twice, mainly because once it’s out in the open, Mark fucks you until you can’t feel your legs. And most days, you would prefer not to limp from class to class.

Another gasp rips out of your throat when he discards your clothing with the flick of his wand. He casts a silencing charm on the room, and you know you’re done for.

He leaves you in your undergarments, and today, you have chosen to wear a nice lacy number in Slytherin green. The sight makes him hiss in frustration, and it isn’t long before he slams you down on a nearby desk. You whimper at the contact, but Mark hardly cares about your well-being at this point.

He snickers at the sight of your ruined underwear, snapping the garter you’re wearing against your skin as you yelp.

“Look at you. Greedy little slut. Who got you this wet?”

“D-Donghyuck,” you manage to say, gathering enough courage.

The answer earns you a slap across the face and you cry at the pain.

“Wrong answer. Try again.”

“Y-You, Daddy. Just y-you.”

He hums in contentment. You shudder when you feel a finger run up and down your slit. “I’m going to make the rules very clear today. You’ll do your best to obey them, or else I’ll use your body how I please without letting you cum. Understood?” At your timid nod, he continues. “I’m going to fuck your tight little cunt raw. I’m going to cum as much as I like, and make you cum as much as I like. If I hear any protests, I’ll add an extra orgasm to the list. I don’t care if you’ve reached your limit. I don’t care if you can’t handle any more. I’ll do whatever I like, and there will be no arguments about it.”

You chew on your bottom lip. Mark has never fucked you raw before — you both always use Muggle condoms or contraceptive charms.

“But, Mark-“

He slaps your clothed slit and you gasp loudly. “That’s another orgasm added to the list. Do you want another one? We’re already at five.”

Your eyes widen. You’ve never been able to take more than three orgasms from him without passing out. You immediately shake your head, sealing your lips tight.

“Good. Bend over.”

You scramble to follow his orders, shakily positioning yourself over the desk. Another flick of his wand and you’re completely naked. You whimper at the vulnerability, wondering if he also cast locking charms on the doors too. Anyone could walk in and see you bent over like this.

Mark usually likes to see your face when he fucks you so you’ve never really tried this position with him. Goosebumps rise on your skin when you feel his hands exploring your backside.

“Wish everyone could see you like this for me. Bent over during dinner while I fuck you into the table. They always tease me about you. Gryffindor Head Boy could never satisfy his partner. They think I’m such a goody-two-shoes.” You almost scream when a finger unexpectedly pushes into you. “I wonder what everyone would think now — having you bent over the Potions desk like this, eager to be fucked like a little whore. Waiting for my cock to split you apart, isn’t that right?”

“Y-Yes, Daddy,” you garble.

He adds another finger, the squelch of your wetness causing you to grow even warmer. He thrusts his fingers inside of you, skillfully digging them into the spot you love.

“Do you know how many times I’ve thought about your cunt? Ever since you made that ridiculous bet with me, I knew I was done for. I had to excuse myself so many times from class just to rub one out in the bathroom. Seeing you in this cute little skirt, so eager to earn House Points, so willing to please the professor. I imagined how tight your pussy would feel when I wrapped a hand around myself, how many of those sweet moans I could bring out of you.”

When he pushes a third finger in, you shriek as you cum without warning. You were probably moaning without any sense, writhing on top of the desk as Mark fingers you through your orgasm. He drank up every single one of your sounds, gazing down at you with a feral look in his eyes.

Even as your orgasm subsides, Mark doesn’t stop fucking you. You almost request for him to give you a break, but you know it’ll just earn you another orgasm.

He watches you, waiting for you to beg for him to stop. He smiles when you obey, continuing to thrash and whine as his digits pump into you.

“So pretty, perfect for me. You’re always so tight, it’s not fair to me, you know? I could fuck you every single day and you would still need to be stretched out regardless.” He leans over your frame, mouth beginning to press open mouthed kisses at your throat. The sensation has you jolting, his fingers grinding down to rub at your clit. “But you would like that, wouldn’t you? So hungry for my cock.”

This was true — you couldn’t seem to get enough of Mark on a daily basis. Even if you didn’t fuck every single day, you always had the urge to get on your knees for him and suck his cock. It calmed you in a way. Before exams, Mark would pull you into a nearby alcove and let you suck him off until your worries disappeared.

You could feel your high approaching again. “P-P-Please,” you stutter, gasping and pushing yourself further down his fingers. “Please, Daddy.”

At the sound of your begging, Mark sinks to his ground. He jerks your body until you’re halfway off the desk, pushing your thighs apart so he can see you fully. He takes a moment to marvel at how pretty you are before licking a stripe up your cunt. You groan, fingers tangling into his hair, which is still slightly damp from his after-game shower.

He hums against your folds, exploring them with his tongue. Mark could eat you out for days and remain unbothered by the outside world. There have been multiple times where you’ve woken up to his head in between your legs as he snuck into your dormitory room early in the morning to get a taste of you. There’s also been a few occasions when he would convince you to sneak out while he runs patrol in the hallways, just so he could prop you against a wall and eat you out until you cry.

Your eyes flutter closed as you revel in the feeling of Mark’s mouth on your cunt. He’s groaning with you, hands cupping your thighs and bringing you closer to him. His nose continuously nudges your clit as he licks you, slurping on the remnants of your orgasm.

It doesn’t register for a few seconds that he’s still talking to you.

“This is mine. My cunt for fucking. I’m the only one who’s allowed to see you like this, understand? The only one who gets to make you cum.”

He is, indeed. You topple headfirst into your second orgasm, juices spilling into Mark’s waiting mouth. He cleans you up as your body attempts to recover. You’re lucky he remembered to place a silencing charm, your voice almost giving out with the amount of screams you’ve emitted. He decides to spare you this time, rising from the ground and licking his lips.

“Tastes so good.” He smirks down at you, watching as your chest rises and falls from heavy panting. You feel like you’ve run a marathon, but he looks like he’s only just started. His fingers brush stray hairs away from your face. “Poor baby. All fucked out already? I haven’t even given you my cock yet.”

You blink deliriously in response and he laughs. His fingers dig into your hips once more as he adjusts you on your back again.

“How about you answer a question for me? If you answer correctly, I’ll give you my cock. If you fail, I’ll add another orgasm to the list.” You blink again in response, brain fuzzy. He grins. “Why don’t you tell me what a bad girl you’ve been these past few weeks?”

He slaps the inside of your thigh to jolt you out of your reverie. “I-I was a b-bad girl, Daddy.”

“Hm? And why’s that?”

“I ignored y-you,” you whisper as his hand cups your breast, tweaking your nipple between his fingers. “I cheered for S-Slytherin when I-I should have b-been c-c-cheering for Gryffindor.”

Your breath grows more shaky as Mark’s other hand inches towards your entrance again.

“And?”

“And I f-f-flirted with D-Donghyuck when I’m o-only s-s-supposed to have e-eyes for y-you, Daddy.”

“And?”

“And I charmed m-my clothes t-to tempt you.”

“Because?”

“Because I’m a whore.”

He smiles in contentment. “That’s right.”

Instead of pushing his fingers inside of you, you’re taken aback when the tip of his cock sinks into you. You moan loudly, not even noticing he had taken off his trousers.

“Fuck,” he curses, watching himself push into you. “Such a tight little cunt. Only for Daddy’s eyes, right?”

“Y-Yes, Daddy.”

His fingers find their way to your throat, curling and gripping your windpipe. You gasp and hear his sinister chuckle.

“There’s my little whore. Back in her place.”

He almost pushes you off the desk with the force of his thrusts. You have another small orgasm when Mark fully bottoms out, and he laughs when he realizes.

“Already? Looks like you’ve been just as desperate as me, baby.”

You’ve never taken more than three orgasms before. Since Hogwarts was a big school with many prying eyes, it was hard to get alone time with Mark like this. You often had to face the judgmental glares from the portraits whenever Mark fingered you behind one of the tapestries. Now that he has you all to himself, however, he intends to make the most out of it.

You’re pushing on the border of exhaustion, watching as your boyfriend continues to furiously push into you. He moves his hand from your throat to your cheek, slapping you once more to wake you up.

“Have to stay awake, baby. We still have two more to go.”

You mumble incoherently in response, past the point of comprehension. Once the tip of his cock rubs against your sweet spot, you cry out in pleasure. He grunts, angling himself so that he keeps hitting that spot inside of you. Over and over.

“M-Mark, I-“

“I know. Let me feel you, baby. Want to feel your cunt cum all over Daddy’s cock.”

You can’t begin to explain the tightening feeling in your stomach. You feel like you’re flying up to your peak at an unsteady rate. It almost feels like you need to use the bathroom, but before you can warn Mark, you fall apart.

You think you black out for a bit. You blink dazedly, body twitching and nervously moving on top of the desk. You get the strength to lift your head and check on Mark. His cock has slipped out of you, his gaze locked on your pussy.

“M-Mark?” You ask softly.

“Fuck, baby. You just squirted all over me.”

You gasp. You’ve never been able to squirt before and you eye the mess you’ve made all over Mark’s chest. He grunts, fingers pumping up and down his cock.

“Fuck fuck fuck. How can you be so perfect?”

And then he’s pushing back into you. You scream loudly, still trying to recover from such an intense orgasm. You realize that you’ve started crying, tears spilling down your cheeks.

“Perfect girl for me,” he hisses, hand returning to paw at your breast. “Cunt is so so sweet. Can never get enough of you. Just give me one more, baby. One more.”

You want to tell him you can’t, you’ve reached your limit and can’t push it any farther. You squeal when he pinches your clit.

“Daddy, please-“

“Daddy wants another, baby. One more for me.”

His thumb circles your clit while his cock pistons in and out of you. When he finds your sweet spot again, he doesn’t rest. He’s on a mission to get you to orgasm again, the same expression painted on his face from the Quidditch game just a hour ago. He’s determined to see you fall apart, filth spewing from his mouth.

“I wish I could take you like this every time. Push you up in the hallways, fuck you until you’re a sobbing mess for me. Having everyone watch while I make you squirt, showing them I can fuck you better than anyone else can. I bet they would all be jealous. They could never have you falling apart for them, begging for them to fill you up with their seed.”

It dawns on you that Mark still hasn’t cast a contraceptive charm of any kind. He seems to be on the same wavelength as you, digging his heels to the floor and thrusting harder at the thought of cumming inside you. The lewd sound of your wetness fills the room, along with his grunts and your whimpers from oversensitivity.

“I want to fuck you everywhere before we leave this place. Want you to ride me in the middle of the Quidditch pitch for everyone to see. Want all the Gryffindors to watch as their Head Boy plows into his girlfriend in the common room. Want you to bounce on my cock during every meal. Fuck, I want you so badly, baby.”

When you squirt this time, you’re coherent enough to watch it happen. Drops of your slick pour out of you, gushing onto Mark’s cock and the floor. The sound of his thighs slapping against yours only grows louder and wetter with your orgasm.

Mark hisses. “Want my cum, baby?”

“Yes, Daddy,” you echo back to him, barely staying awake.

He groans when he reaches his high, pushing deep inside of you to empty his load. He cums more than you expected, but you suppose he’s been holding it in for weeks. He finally finishes a minute later, collapsing on top of you. He subconsciously places kisses on your neck.

“Never act up like that again. I don’t think I have the stamina to do another round.”

You giggle, about to respond when the booming voice of your Potions professor echoes throughout the room.

“Mark Lee! What on earth do you children think you’re doing? Fifty points from Gryffindor!”

#nct smut #mark #mark smut

[storiesforallfandoms]

you’re my best friend ~ pete davidson

word count: 2002

request?: yes!

“pete friends to lovers”

description: in which two best friends get super sappy while drunk

pairing: pete davidson x female!reader

warnings: swearing, alcohol and weed usage

masterlist (one, two)

You were already two glasses of wine deep when Pete showed up, two cases of beer in his hands. He had a look of excitement on his face, which slowly fell when he realized there was no one else in your apartment.

“Everyone else cancelled,” you answered his unasked question.

“Everyone?” Pete asked.

You nodded. “Prior commitments or just not wanting to come or some shit.”

Pete came over and plopped himself down on the couch next to you. The case of beer was at his feet and he popped it open, taking out a bottle and immediately chugging it. You looked at him in amusement as he did so. Once he was finished, you asked, “Aren’t they warm?”

“Room temperature,” he corrected.

“Isn’t that gross?”

“A little, but obviously I have to catch up with you so we can be on even playing fields all night.”

You smiled and poured yourself another glass of wine as Pete opened another beer and started to drink again.

Between the heavy amounts of alcohol and the joint that Pete had brought, the two of you had gotten fucked up in no time. At some point you couldn’t even get up off the couch for more drinks, or for water that you both knew you should be drinking. The hangover you were going to have the next day was going to be killer, but in the moment neither one of you really cared.

You were both laid back on the couch, legs intertwined as you laughed at something Pete had said. It probably wasn’t even that funny, but in your inebriated state, everything was hilarious.

“You’re, like, my bestest friend, Pete,” you slurred. “No one else even bothered the show up, but you did!”

“I’m sure everyone else had like...stuff happening,” Pete said. “Adult things like...I don’t know...kids and taxes.”

You retched at the thought. “Yeah, no, I’m good with not having those adult things to do. Having kids, while extremely cute, is also extremely exhausting. But I don’t think anyone would’ve shown. No one else really...hangs out with me anymore.”

You laid your head back so you were looking at the ceiling. You could feel a lump growing in your throat and didn’t want Pete to see if you started crying. You knew this sudden emotion was most likely caused by the alcohol and the weed, but you also knew it was something genuine, a concern you had deep down that you had never voiced to anyone before.

You could hear Pete move to sit up and immediately turned your head away so he couldn’t see your face, even though you knew that looked more suspicious than anything.

“Everyone is busy, (Y/N),” he said, his voice soft. “I’m sure they’ll be able to hang out soon enough.”

“They’re not too busy to miss out on work get togethers, or going out with one another.” You sighed. “I know people grow apart and that’s just what happens when you grow up, I just didn’t think it was going to be all of my friends growing up and drifting apart all at the one time.”

“What am I, chopped liver?”

You giggled and sat up. The room spun around you as you did so and it felt like your stomach lurched. You had to take a moment to steady yourself before focusing your attention on Pete.

“I told you, you’re my bestest friend,” you said.

Pete’s smile slowly faded as he looked at you. “(Y/N), don’t cry please.”

You had forgotten about your emotional moment entirely. You wiped your cheek to find a wet streak running from your eye to your chin. You looked away from Pete again, suddenly feeling ashamed by your needless emotions. You were glad that the two of you were so drunk in that moment and would likely forget all of this the next day.

Pete’s hand lightly touched your chin, lifting it so that you were looking at him again. You looked into his eyes as he used his thumb to wipe the tears from your other cheek. Your breath caught in your throat as you realized how closely the two of you were sat together.

“I’ll always be here,” he assured you. “No matter how much we grow up or grow apart, I’ll always be one phone call away.”

You nodded, unable to get the words to unstick from your throat. You believed him, you knew he’d always be here.

The smell of beer and weed was strong as Pete leaned forward more, and normally you’d hate the smell combination. But you were too distracted by Pete’s eyes to notice, and a moment later you were too distracted by his lips on yours.

You had never viewed Pete as anything more than a friend before. You had grown up together. You were partners in crime since the first day you met in middle school. Your friends, and even your family, often made jokes that the two of you would end up together, but you both laughed it off. You were best friends, two peas in a pod, nothing more.

But now, with his lips moving against yours and his arms pulling you as close to him as you could get, you weren’t so sure. It could’ve been the drunken state the two of you were in, mixed with the emotions you were feeling just moments before. When the two of you sobered up the next day you may have not even remembered what happened, but in the moment you wanted all of him. You wanted his lips, his hands, his body, his heart, and you wanted to give him all of you in return.

His tongue brushed against your lips and you gladly let it in. It was wet and tasted like beer, so not the most romantic thing in the world, but it felt good in the moment. You felt like nothing could ruin what was happening, until your stomach lurched again.

You quickly pulled away from Pete and rushed to the bathroom. You didn’t even have time to kick the door closed behind you before you collapsed next to the toilet and threw up everything you had eaten and drank the past few hours. Pete followed closely behind you, pulling your hair back and gently rubbing your back. When you stopped throwing up for long enough, he got up to get you some water and made you drink it all before he did anything else.

“I didn’t think I was that bad of a kisser,” he joked. You glared at him over your shoulder before throwing up again.

Once you felt steady enough, Pete helped you to your feet. You brushed your teeth and took a mouthful of mouthwash in order to get rid of the taste of vomit. Pete helped you to your bedroom, where he had another glass of water and an Aspirin waiting for you.

“You’ll need that in the morning,” he said. “I’ll let you get changed.”

“You’ll stay with me though, right?” you asked. Suddenly you hated the thought of Pete having to leave.

He smiled. “Of course I will. I just want to give you some privacy while you change. You’re not supposed to see a girl naked till, like, the third date.”

You smiled back at him, a fuzzy feeling building inside of you at the thought of actually going on a date with Pete.

You changed into a pair of comfy pajamas and downed the glass of water Pete had left for you. You ventured out of your room to the kitchen to pour up another glass. You found Pete putting the bottles of beer in the recycling container and putting your glass in the sink.

“Why aren’t you as fucked up as I am right now?” you questioned.

“I could always handle my booze better than you,” he teased. You scowled and stuck your tongue out at him. He chuckled and put an arm around your shoulders. “Come on, let’s go to bed.”

After some convincing, Pete agreed to join you in bed. At first he laid a respectable distance away from you, but you moved close to him and placed your head on his chest. He wrapped his arms around you, running his hands through your hair as your eyes became too heavy to stay open.

“You’ll regret this in the morning,” he murmured. “Or forget it completely.”

“Maybe,” you said, “but let’s wait for the morning to decide that.”

~~~~~~

When you woke up the next morning you groaned in pain. Your head felt heavy and like it had been stabbed by multiple little needles. You opened your eyes but had to shut them again immediately, hissing at the pain that small action caused.

Why the fuck did I drink so much last night? you questioned as you braced yourself and opened your eyes again.

You found yourself alone in bed, which didn’t seem too unusual until you remembered that you hadn’t been alone when you fell asleep. Pete had been there, more specifically he had been cuddling you.

You’ll regret this in the morning, you recalled him saying before you drifted off to sleep. You wondered if he had left before you had the chance to decide how you felt about the events of the night before.

You popped two Aspirin pills into your mouth and swallows them with a mouthful of water. You pulled yourself out of bed and slowly walked out of your room, the only speed you could manage in this state. You were halfway to your kitchen when you realized you were smelling something; bacon. You wondered where the smell was coming from, and didn’t have to look far to get the answer.

Pete was stood by your stove, two plates full of eggs and toast already sat next to him. When he heard you enter, he turned and greeted you with a smile.

“Good morning sleeping beauty!” he said. His loud voice pierced your ears and you quickly covered them and groaned. He chuckled. “You poor thing, you’re gonna hate today.”

“I already do,” you said. “Is that for me?”

He looked down at the plate of breakfast. “One of them is, yeah. Do you think you can keep it down?”

“I can try.”

The two of you sat at your dining room table and began to eat. Although your stomach still didn’t feel right, the food was definitely soaking up whatever alcohol was left in your system and thus was making the splitting headache you had subside just a little bit.

There was an awkward silence looming over the two of you. Despite what you thought the night before, you could still remember every detail; the emotional conversation, the kiss, the cuddling, how you felt when the latter two things were happening. You knew Pete remembered because he certainly wasn’t as fucked up as you were.

“Do you regret it?” you found yourself suddenly asking.

Pete looked up from his breakfast, fake confusion on his face. “What do you mean?”

You gave him a look. “Pete, I remember last night. I remember what we did, and what you said before I fell asleep.”

He sighed, turning his attention back to his food. “I don’t know...do you regret it?”

“I don’t,” you admitted. “If anything, I...I feel whatever the opposite of regret is. The only thing I regret is getting so drunk I threw up after we kissed.”

He smiled. “Yeah, that’s not exactly great timing.”

You looked at him, still waiting for his answer. Finally, he looked up at you again and said, “I don’t regret it either.”

“So what do we do now?” you asked.

Pete thought for a moment before saying, “I take you out on a date, one where we’re both completely sober, and we decide if we really want to do this. How does that sound?”

You smiled brightly at him. “I think that sounds like a great plan.”

#Pete Davidson #pete davidson imagine #pete davidson x reader #imagine #one shot #request #fanfiction #fanfic #fandom

[strangelysamantha]

bittersweet ☆

possessive!rafe x plus!sized reader.

warnings: crazy rafe, possessive and obsessive behavior, swearing, underage drinking, reader gets hurt, physical fight, ect.

words: 2,167.

summary: you went to a local party by the beach when rafes unstable side peeked out. jj maybank finds you alone, and decides to talk to you. rafe gets possessive and upset, thinking that jj was hitting on you.

request?: no :)

a/n: i’m working on requests but since my computer is down it’s taking longer because i hate typing on my phone especially because tumblr always deletes what i’ve written. i’m hopeful that my computer will be fixed by tomorrow, until then i’ll try and produce a few stories since i’ve been MIA for a few days. remember to like and comment if you enjoy this! <3

my masterlist

——————————————————————————

“please just come with me.” rafe frowned as he sat on your porch pleading to you, telling you why you should go to a beach party with him. “why rafe?” you frown, not in a partying mood. instead, you would much rather stay home and do a movie marathon. “please baby, i swear i’ll make it up to you.” you roll your eyes at his begging. “fine, but only because you are so cute.” his eyes sparkle as a smile lifts on his lips, you pull him into a quick kiss.

you walk back inside to get dressed for the bonfire. rafe was wearing blue and orange, and you wanted to match him. so, you grabbed a pair of dark blue ripped jean shorts, and an orange v-neck. you apply some perfume and jewelry before putting on some shoes. just as you were finishing up, rafe walked into your room smirking. “awh, you wanted to match with me.” he smiled. despite you knowing his look was filled with adoration you couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable under his long glance. “obviously, don’t you want people to know i’m yours?” you question him, waiting for his response. “well, matching clothes won’t change anything. everyone already knows.” you nod smiling before pulling him into a kiss.

once you pull away from the kiss, he grabs your hand and leads you to the car as he drives to the beach. his hand finding its way on your thigh; gripping it tightly. while he drove to the beach, you paid close attention to your phone, checking social media for any major updates. rafes grasp on your thigh loosened as the car came to a halt. you were parked on the beach, the sun was already setting.

you both exit the car, rafe swiftly moving from his side of the car to yours. “thank you for coming with me.” his hand finds yours, pulling them together. “of course, i love hanging out with you.” he lets go of your hand, and moves his arm to hold closely around your waist. the two of you begin to walk towards the already drunken teen filled beach.

you frown at the amount of trash that litters the sand. you stay close to rafe, as he approaches topper and kelce. “hey guys.” you say to them to make conversation. they nod in your direction, acknowledging you before their attention turns towards rafe again. you don’t pay any mind to what the boys are discussing. after a while you become bored, so you slowly slip out of rafes arm to go get a drink. “i’m going to go get a drink, do you want one?” you ask rafe, and he glances at you smiling. “yes please, thanks baby.” you lean in for a quick kiss before leaving to go get drinks. you weren’t a heavy drinker, always scared of what you would say or do under the influence, so you grab yourself a water and grab a beer for rafe.

you return to the spot you were in earlier, but it’s now vacant. rafe, topper, and kelce all leaving you behind. you frown, looking around for them but coming up short. you had no idea where they could be since this beach was huge. you don’t bother wasting your time looking for them, instead you start to head for the bonfire.

you weren’t surprised that rafe had left you all alone. this always happened. he would beg you to go to something, just to abandon you half way through it. it didn’t bother you, it just worried you, scared of what he was doing without you.

once you arrived at the bonfire, you decided to down the drink once made for rafe, the beer stinging your throat. you drank three more chugs before drinking water as well. it doesn’t take long for the alcohol to come into effect. you knew it had clouded your judgement when you were laughing at jj maybanks jokes of all people. “i’m telling you, these people were fucking crazy.” you giggled as he made exaggerated reactions. “you’re telling me! that sounds scary as fuck. i wouldn’t have survived.” he shook his head looking down at you, “i’m sure you would have figured something out.” you nod at him.

“have you seen those dudes since?” you ask, intrigued by his story. “actually, yeah. their story isn’t the brightest… sheriff told me that they-” his voice cut off as he made a slicing noise above his throat. your eyes widened in shock. “oh my god! really??” you grab his arm, “what if they came back for you! bro no way…” your heart rate quickens at the thought of evil men chasing random kids. “no, i know right, scary as shit. i guess it’s bittersweet because they died, but now they aren’t after us anymore.” he shrugs, sipping his red solo cup. “i guess. it’s still scary. so many people are unexpectedly dying nowadays, i definitely-” you were interrupted as rafe put an arm around you, eyeing jj up and down.

“continue baby, what were you saying?” rafe asked, smiling at you for a split second before it disappeared when his eyes focused on jj again. “oh we were just talking about bad men, and how this town is scarier than it used to be.” he nods at you. “jj what are you doing talking to my girl?” jj stands up straighter, “why do you care? do you own her or something?” rafe scoffed, “yes.” the confusion on your face was evident and jj was quick on acknowledging it. “oh really? by the look on her face, she doesn’t agree.” he glances at you, but you have quickly recovered. “what are you talking about maybank?” you interrupted the two immediately not wanting a fight to break out. “i was just talking to jj because he had a funny story. it wasn’t anything like that, i swear babe.” you words slurred together and it was evident you weren’t in the right headspace.

rafes eyes widened as he fully realized that you were so intoxicated that you had no idea what was going on, “what the fuck maybank? you got her drunk for what? you trying to fuck her?” jj couldn’t believe rafes nerve. “one, she was drunk when she came up to me, and two, i don’t need to fuck her, i already have.” your heart dropped at jj's confession.

“maybank, do you want to take that back?” you could tell rafe was trying to give jj a chance to redeem himself before all hell breaks loose. your hand tightened on rafes bicep trying to get him to move on, but he wouldn’t budge. “can't take back what’s already happened.” jj shrugged again, smirking.

rafe was the first one to throw a punch, you stumbled back as he had pushed you away. with your luck, your head had landed right against the beverage table, scratching the side of your face from your temple to the side of your cheek. you hiss in pain, moving your fingers to feel it. when you retreat your hand you see it covered in blood. you groan in pain, hissing as the cool air makes it sting.

you clumsy stand up, looking ahead to see rafe and jj were still fighting. “rafe!” you weakly call out, but he was stuck in his own little bubble as he pounded his fists against jjs face. you stumble away, walking far from the beach. you were too tired to even try to process what was going on. the yelling behind you quietly faded as you made your way farther along the beach.

not even a minute later you hear rafe running after you. “what rafe?” you ask, but your back is still turned to him. “baby, please just- i’m sorry okay. i, i don’t know. i was just scared he’d take you from me. i don’t want to lose you, you are all i have. you mean too much to me for some pogue to take.” his rambling only pissed you off more. “rafe, please. i have a headache, all i want is to go home.” you frown.

his eyes moved from the sand up to your face, surprised by the huge gash on your face that was oozing blood. “baby?! who did this to you?” you couldn’t contain your anger any longer. you used all your strength, pushing his shoulders back. “you did! you fucking asshole.” the fact that he didn’t even budge from the push you sent his way, pissed you off even more. “baby, i, you know i would never do anything to intentionally hurt you?” your silence only scared him even more.

“baby, i wouldn’t- i didn’t mean to hurt you.” his breathing was heavy as the realization hit him. he had undeniably hurt you, and he had undoubtedly lost you. “no, because this can’t be happening. i can't lose you. baby, i- it was an accident. please, you gotta understand i didn’t want to hurt you, it was just jj fucking all over you, and the way he tried to claim you, saying he already had you, it just- the anger i couldn’t even hold myself back.” you nod at his words. “rafe i understand that. i, just. i don’t want this. do you think i want you to assault every guy who even looks at me? it makes me feel like shit. do you know how shitty it makes me feel? that you think i would chose anyone else when i have you. it hurts to know that you think i’m not loyal enough.” you frown, tears easily falling out of your eyes.

“baby- it’s not you i’m worried about.” you nod, “i know… it just doesn’t feel that way.” he goes to speak again but you quickly interrupt him. “can we please continue this at your house? my head seriously hurts.” his eyes soften, his hand cupping your cheek. he hesitated before he pulled you into a kiss, when you kissed him back he could feel his smile come back. “rafe.” you say again, before pointing to your head. “right baby, i’m sorry. let's go.” you nod.

he walks you to his car, opening the door for you before you hop in. he puts your seatbelt on for you. his protective side shining through once again. he walks around, before hopping in himself. he starts the car. “seatbelt…?.” you question. he laughs quietly. “of course, baby.” you nod as he puts his seatbelt on. his hand reached for your thigh again, before he drove the two of you to his house.

when you arrived, your head was pounding. you could feel it throbbing, the blood dripping onto your orange v neck. you frown at the sight. the two of you walk inside, and he immediately pulls you into his room, placing you on the edge of his bed. he runs to his bathroom grabbing a table cloth and the first aid kit.

he opens the first aid kit, placing it beside you. he takes the wet washcloth, wiping away the blood. after cleaning it, he added antibacterial cream, and then covered it in gauze. he kissed the bandage covering it before walking to his closet.

“here. wear this, and i’ll wash your t-shirt.” you nod, “thank you rafe.” he turns around and you swiftly change your t-shirt. he turns around, his heart hammering inside his chest, still scared about where you stood.

“rafe. i don’t want to lose you. i love you a lot, but i don’t want to continue this if every time a guy looks at me funny, you beat him up. i appreciate you protecting me, but they aren’t worth it.” he nods, soaking up every word. “if you can promise me that you won’t fight random people anymore, then i think we can work this out, and work through this.” he smiles softly, “is that a deal?” you ask. “of course baby. i promise i won’t fight anyone unless they really deserve it.” you roll your eyes, “fine. that’s good enough; but please, let’s hope it doesn’t get too bad.” he laughs, “let’s hope.” you grab his hands, realizing they were quite bruised. “let’s ice these.” he follows you to the kitchen, as you prepare an ice pack.

once the ice pack is ready, you place it on one hand, the other is intently grabbing your thigh. “baby you don’t have to do all this.” he reached for the ice and you lightly pushed his hand away. “you fixed me up, let me fix you up.” he sat back and watched as you cared for his bruises. rafe was glad he didn’t lose you, and he was glad you were still there with him. having you so close to him made him realize he couldn’t sacrifice anything to lose you. he kissed your bandages once more before you two prepared for bed and started to comfortably cuddle together.

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