#we planned our whole lives around each other and she came out two years later and started dating someone who looked a lot like me 👀

[punk4ndisorderly]

light on

The one where Y/N is the daughter of a legendary Team USA coach and used to attend the development program with the boys. 8 years after they last saw each other in person, a reunion brings Jack and Y/N back into each other’s lives... and hearts.

if you keep the light on, i'll keep the light on

XIV XV - i do, i do, i do, i do, i do XVI

The grey curtains that kept the room dark after dawn were pulled back abruptly, revealing two sleeping bodies. The tiny woman had her back pressed to the much larger man’s chest, not even an inch of space separating them. His hand rested on the outline of her hips, over the covers.

“You need to get up. Now!” Cole pleaded, turning his back to the groggy pair and leaving, running down the hall knocking on Quinn and Alex’s room door.

Y/N practically jumped out of the bed, the lack of the warmth her body had provided giving Jack the encouragement he needed to push himself out of it as well, following her to their friends’ weekend accommodation.

“What’s going on?” the foctor asked, crossing her arms over her exposed chest as Cole pulled Quinn out of bed.

“River went rogue.”

“What?!” the foursome half-shouted, now completely awake and shocked.

“I slept with him downstairs because he wanted to follow tradition and Trevor stayed with David and Leo. When I woke up, he was gone. I’ve looked for him everywhere.” he explained, every bone in his body trembling with anxiety.

“If River doesn’t want to be found, he won’t be found.” Alex stated, yawning and stretching. “It’s useless to look for him.”

Y/N stared at them, still processing what was happening. River must’ve been really freaking out if he had fled the location on his wedding day. Something wasn’t adding up.

“Alright, here’s what we’re going to do: you…” she pointed to Alex. “Shut up. Jack, would you mind closing the doors David doesn’t find out his fiancé is MIA.”

The Devils' player obliged to her request, waiting for her to disclose the plan to recover the missing groom.

“We’re checking every room in this house. Cole, I know you did that already, but maybe he came back in the meantime. Then, we search for the Runaway Groom in our surroundings. Our last resort will be taking the cars and drive around the community.” Y/N instructed, certain her plan was bulletproof. “I think my brother didn’t go far.”

The five friends split, checking each division at the cabin before heading outside. An hour later, there was still no sign of River, which made them freak out even more.

“Oh god, what are we going to tell David?” Alex cried, running his hands through his hair.

“Turc, it’s going to be okay. You guys will get the cars and I’ll stay here doing damage control. They’re not up yet. Trevor could probably sleep through the end of the world, Leo was exhausted and David was sprawled all over the spare mattress the last time I checked.”

“Okay, so you just tell them we all went to look for Ginger because she ran away. We’ll take her with us, she’ll be our alibi. It’s a perfectly reasonable explanation for this whole mess.”

Jack listened intently to Y/N, who was attempting to keep everyone calm in the middle of a crisis. She always found a way to make things better, even when she was only making use of her words to do so.

He liked her but, above that, he respected and admired her strength and grace. Never had he met a woman that could quite compare to Y/N. His Y/N.

“The hair and makeup team will be here at noon. It’s currently a few minutes past eight. We need to get him here by eleven thirty, tops.”

“Got it. We’ll get Ginger.” Quinn offered, picking up his car keys and sunglasses.

“Aw, why do we have to get the dog?” Alex wailed, walking right behind him, dragging his feet.

Cole hid his face in his hands, muttering something under his breath before perking up and putting on a smile.

“Do you think this will fool them?” he asked, trying his best not to look stressed out.

Y/N pressed her lips into a tight line, a sympathetic look on her bare face.

“It’ll have to do. Jack and I will keep you updated, don’t worry.” the doctor assured her friend, holding him by the shoulders. “This wedding is happening.”

Cole simply nodded, wanting to believe her words more than everything, prompting the pair to begin their search.

Y/N put her sneakers on, throwing the man right behind her his car keys.

As they drove down the dirt road, the hockey player saw how worry was etched on her angelic features, taking his right hand from the steering wheel and squeezing hers.

“How much do you want to bet someday we’ll be laughing about this whole mess?” he said, earning a half-smile from his partner. “Hey, it’s just like you said: it’ll all be okay. River is probably just winding down somewhere and…”

The brunette man stopped himself mid-sentence, his face lighting up in realization. Y/N turned to him, her eyebrow raising, as if to ask him to voice the thoughts that were going through his head.

“I think I know where he might be.”

Pulling up to a quaint waffle house, Jack squinted, trying to locate the missing bride inside. He spotted him easily, sat in a booth, surrounded by empty plates and having yet another one set in front of him.

“Oh my god, there he is!” the doctor gasped. “I need to call Cole.” she added. “How did you know where he'd be?”

“There’s two things you need to always keep in mind when we’re talking about your brother: he has had the words to The Piña Colada Song stuck in his head ever since he first heard it and, when he needs to think, he finds the nearest place that serves sugary breakfast food and eats until he figures out what he's going to do… Or, you know, until be's stuffed.” he explained. “I lived with him for a while when I accidentally flooded my apartment, remember?” the Devils' player chuckled.

“Yeah, but that was like straight out of high school, I wasn’t expecting you to remember these kinds of details.”

“I never forget the tiny things about the people in my life. I still know the name of the perfume my first girlfriend used to wear.”

“You’re a rare finding, Hughes.” Y/N smiled, marveling in how endearing his personality was. “Alright, I’m getting our Julia Roberts. If he makes a run for it, tackle him. Not too hard though, he can’t be bruised or toothless on his wedding day.” she warned, swinging the door open.

“No, let me.” he requested.

“Are you sure?” Y/N checked, wondering how he was planning to deal with the situation.

“Yes. If I screw up, you’ll have to be the one to tackle him, though.” Jack joked, climbing out of the car.

 *

River saw him the minute he walked in, taking another forkful of the insane amount of waffles he'd ordered into his mouth, giving his friend a thumbs up.

“Old habits die hard.” he grinned, sitting in front of him and grabbing the fork from his hands, stealing a portion of the chocolate covered delight he had yet to finish devouring.

“Seems like it, you still think I’m willing to share my food.” the designer smirked, snatching his fork back. “What are you doing here, doofus?”

Jack took a deep breath, fidgeting with his fingers and avoiding eye contact with the groom.

“Listen, I’ve been thinking long and hard about this and…. I think we should be together.”

The eldest Y/L/N got up immediately, reaching over the table to pinch his biceps the hardest he could repeatedly.

“What. The. Fuck. Is. Wrong. With. You?” River growled in between pinches.

“Ow! Ow! Jesus, stop!” he begged, the groom's assault leaving small red marks on his skin.

“I’m getting married today to a man I love unconditionally, I’m not going to leave him to be with you! Are you insane? This is exactly why you should never invite men to your wedding, or anywhere really, you never know when they strike with shit like this!” the designer rambled, fuming. “Unbelievable! You’re one of my oldest friends! Did you hit your head? Jack Rowden Hughes, you fucking dumbass!”

“Calm down, I was only joking!” Jack protested, rubbing his sore arms. “I just wanted to make sure you were still going through with it. Damn, you sure are stronger than you look.” he laughed.

“This is not funny, Jack! What gave you the idea it wasn’t happening and why in the world are you in pajamas in public?”

“Didn’t really have time to change. You left while everyone else was asleep, didn’t tell a living soul where you were going and you’re sitting here eating a ridiculous amount of food by yourself, only a few hours away from one of the most important events of your life.”

His friend stopped chewing, coming to his senses. It did sound like he had cold feet.

“My mother told me she spent her entire wedding reception going around talking to the guests and barely got anything to eat so I just figured I’d get as much food in my stomach as I could while I had the opportunity.” he confided, drinking the rest of his coffee. “Plus, Cole is like a human furnace, I couldn’t take spending another hour lying in bed with him using me as a body pillow.”

Jack let out a hearty laugh, imagining River trying to sneak out without waking up their friend. He smiled in response, signaling the waitress to bring him the check.

“Thank you.”

“For what?” the hockey player asked, reaching for the bill, taking his wallet out to pay.

“I know you remembered my stress eating habits.” he replied. “You’re a really good guy, Jack Hughes. Never forget that.”

He looked up at him, returning his sincere grin and placing money on the table.

“Thanks, Riv.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re welcome. If you tell anyone I will deny it.” River joked. “Oh, and I am paying for my food, thank you very much.”

“Nonsense. I kind of forgot your wedding present at home so… I guess the heavy breakfast will have to do for now.”

“You don’t…” he began to protest.

“I know, but it’s my treat. Now, let’s get out of here. Brace yourself for a magnificent set of lectures from two very stressed people. Possibly three. Quinn's not happy with having been awoken by a frantic Cole.”

*

 The minute they arrived back at the cabin, Cole grabbed River, almost choking him in a tight embrace, doing his best to keep her voice down so he wouldn’t catch the attention of the three men who were kept in the dark about the whole situation.

Ushering the groom inside, the blond man made it his mission to guard him.

“I made breakfast, it’s on the table. Hurry up, people, we’ve got a wedding to get ready for.” he yelled from upstairs, closing the master bedroom’s door behind him.

Jack sat Y/N Alina at the table, where David, Teevor and Leo had been eating for about ten minutes before they all walked in. The duo immediately treated themselves to the French toasts Cole had made, their stomachs growling with hunger.

“Did you find Ginger?” the groom asked, genuinely worried.

The pair glanced at each other, trying to decide what to say.

“Mmm… Yeah, Quinny and Turc found her.” the doctor said, clearing her throat.

As if on cue, the two friends made their grand entrance, with Quinn holding the pup in his arms.

“Did somebody call for the dog whisperers?” the curly-haired man crowed.

“I thought we agreed that sounded corny.” Quinn said through gritted teeth.

“Can I go pet Ginger now, uncle David?” Leo requested, still chewing his food.

“Take your plate to the kitchen first.”

“Thanks!” the little boy chirped, speeding up to the kitchen and quickly making his way back, taking the docile dog from Quinn. “She’s the best!”

“I want you to be upstairs for your shower in ten. Your mom and dad will be here in no time.” David warned, giving his nephew his pretend stern look.

“I know, I know.”

“Well, I should head up. I’m supposed to help River with the outfit and the stress.” Y/N chuckled, getting up and picking her plate up as the dog catchers relished in the deliciousness of the homemade breakfast. “Wait, the dishes still need to be done.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ve got plenty of time to do that.” David assured her, taking the piece of porcelain from her hands. “Go see my man.” he smiled.

“Alright, I’m off. Keep in mind once I step foot in that room I’m no longer your friend, I’m the maid of honor and I will act accordingly.” the coach's daughter joked, squeezing Jack's shoulder lightly.

The Devils' player resisted the sudden urge to cover her hand with his, not wanting her to leave but knowing full well she had to. After all, she had been entrusted with one of the most important tasks at a wedding: groom duty. Who was going to hold the bouquet? Y/N. Who was going to make polite conversation with family members to help the newlyweds escape them so they could mingle with other guests? Y/N. He knew how crucial the beautiful woman’s part was on her brother’s special day, so he couldn’t silently beg her to stay and talk until it was time. If only.

*
The clock struck a quarter to four. Cars continuously arrived at the cabin, some having to park along the dirt road that had led them there. Chatty guests started filling up the seats reserved for them in the multi-tiered wooden amphitheater nestled in pine trees, overlooking the lake.

It amazed Jack how breathtaking the venue was. Weddings weren’t normally his thing. Crowded, potentially award events always made him uneasy. Except for this one. The Devils' player wasn’t thinking about an excuse to cut his stay short after the ceremony, not this time. At that precise moment, as he stood in the aisle, his hands buried in his pockets, he was wondering what the beautiful woman he had known for a decade was doing. Probably containing a scary version of the usually calm and collected River Y/L/N, he thought to himself, chuckling.

“I think you can only walk around with your bow tie undone during the reception. Wedding etiquette.” Y/N spoke from behind him, as if she had magically read his mind and decided to grace him with her presence.

Turning around, much like the eager groom as his bride arrives at the altar, Jack felt the wind being knocked out of him.

In a beige, gold-tone and multicolor silk blend fill loose coupé floral dress with a deep V-neck, sporting her hair in a cascading half updo that perfectly framed her face, Y/N Y/L/N smirked up at her friend, oblivious to the way the brunette man’s chin had almost dropped to the ground.

The short, sleeveless design, featuring a drawstring waist with a hanging tassel and pleated details, was nothing short of astonishing. Accentuating her natural curves and glowing skin, it seemed like it had been made specifically and exclusively for the doctor to wear. Now the image of that magnificent woman in that dress, under the afternoon sunlight that bathed the clearing where they currently stood, was permanently engraved into his brain.

“How do I look?” she inquired, goofily spinning around. “If I were at home getting ready for a party or something, Joey would be begging me to do the princess twirl.”

“You look… Hmmm…” he stuttered, struggling to find words that wouldn’t completely give him out as the dumbfounded mess he was.

“River demanded I’d wear something that would make me look ethereal, which I find to be totally subjective. Heaven doesn’t look the same to everyone, right?” I am totally rambling right now, but - ”

“You look mesmerizing, Y/N.”

The four words slipped off his tongue easily and they were both surprised at the smooth tone of his voice, exponentially steadier than it usually was around her. He couldn’t have said truer words even if he had tried.

Blushing slightly, the petite woman looked away, giving him a peek of the diamond rose gold asymmetric ear cuff she wore on her right ear. The sweeping wing motif evoked an enigmatic blend of fantastical creatures and angels, which only seemed appropriate for the occasion and the landscape surrounding them.

“What’s up with the bow, though?”

“I can’t tie it.” Jack admitted, his shoulders slumping down in shame.

The doctor shook her head, reaching up to grab both ends of his ow tie and starting to fumble around with the piece of fabric.

“How’s the groom?”

“I think my mom and dad might be freaking out more than he is. It’s funny, actually, I-”

“Y/N Y/L/N, where were you? You should be placing the baggies with the rose petals under the chairs! You know the wedding planner completely forgot about them.” Cole reprimanded, holding a basket full of what seemed to be small golden antique satin pouches in his arms.

“Don’t people usually throw rice or something?” a very confused Jack asked, knitting his eyebrows together.

“Not anymore. Apparently, it’s bad for the birds, so I guess we’re just going to have to make it through with the rose petals.” Y/N mocked, teasing Cole.

“There’s no time to joke around, young lady. And what the hell are you doing to the poor man’s bow tie?”

Jack merely looked down, seeing how Y/N had been merely trying to do the bunny ear trick to get the fabric in place. Their friend handed the basked full of bags to the doctor, fixing the mess she had made and signaling for her to follow him once he was done.

“I thought you knew what you were doing?” he shouted as she walked away.

“I never said I did.” Y/N shrugged, winking at him. “Buckle up, Hughes, we’re getting this show on the road.”

*

 “Please be seated. Yes, I am talking to you two youngsters in the second row. Come on.” the officiant, Mr. Brennan, scolded jokingly, waiting for the dynamic duo to stop arguing over who got to sit next to who so he could begin the ceremony. “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the sight of God, surrounded by family and friends, to join together River and David in holy matrimony.”

Jack stared down at his knuckles, remembering the years he had spent seeing a band much like the one he had seen Sean, the groom’s brother, store in his pocket a few minutes before, in Y/N's hand, in pictures he saw on social media or at their friends’ homes.

“If anyone can show just cause why they may not lawfully be joined together, speak now or forever hold your peace.” the septuagenarian declared, looking around to make sure no one spoke or got up before he continued. “Very well, we’ll proceed with the ceremony then.”

Daring to catch a glimpse of the most beautiful maid of honor he had ever seen, the brunette man licked his lips as his eyes locked with Y/N's, managing to steal a cheeky smile from her.

“Marriage deepens and enriches every facet of life. Happiness is fuller; memories are fresher; commitment is stronger. Marriage understands and forgives the mistakes life is unable to avoid. It encourages and nurtures new experiences and new experiences and new ways of expressing love through the seasons of life. In his letter to the Corinthians, Paul wrote: love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth; love bears all things, endures all things; love never ends.”

Y/N took in the priest’s words. Love never ends, but it suffers somewhat of a metamorphosis. We never stop loving someone, the love we feel just fits into another category. It turns into a different kind of affection. She’d somehow have feelings for Charlie, but she wasn’t in love with him anymore. She hadn’t been in many years. That was the difference. The doctor gazed at the wonderful scenery around her: it was perfect, something she could only assume had come out of one of Joey's fairytale books.

“Your relationship will take more than love. It will take trust, dedication, to stay open to one another, to learn and grow, even when it’s difficult to do so. And faith, to go forward together without knowing what the future holds for you. While love is our natural state of being, these other qualities are not as easy to come by. They are not a destination, but a journey. Marriage is a give and take between two personalities. You are mature enough to know the difference between dreams and reality. You also know that good times are sweeter when shared and that difficult times are less harsh when borne by two. Tomorrow can bring you the greatest of joys, but today is the day it all begins.” the officiant proclaimed, motioning for the couple to join hands.

Her warm eyes laid on the man that, in just a matter of weeks, had come back into her life and filled it with excitement, fun and, most of all, joy. The doctor knew something had changed between them but thinking about navigating through feelings she hadn’t experienced intensely in a long time scared her to death. Letting someone in scared her to death.

“These are the hands that are holding yours on your wedding day as you promise to love each other today, tomorrow and forever. These are the hands that will countless times wipe tears from your eyes, tears of joy and sorrow. These are the hands that will help hold your family together as one as you overcome adversity. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it. These are the hands that will work alongside yours as together you build your future.”

Jack remembered the times his hands had held Y/N's, the way hers fit into his as if they were simply the last two pieces of a puzzle he had been waiting all his life to assemble. The Devil's noticed how her hands were shaking slightly as she held on to the bouquet.

“David and River, from this moment on, you will never be alone. You will carry with you the love of another person, giving you a renewed lightness. May your life together be immersed in love and excitement. May you strive to enrich each other in every possible way.”

“Yes! Go River and David!” Trevor hooted, pumping his fist up in the air.

Quinn immediately smacked his friend in the back of the head, placing a finger over his lips to get him to shut up.

“Thank you, young man. These two are very lucky to have you cheering them on.” Mr. Brennan chuckled, along with the couple and the rest of the guests. “With that being said… David, do you take River Y/L/N as your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse; for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?”

“I do.” the groom replied, surely, as a nervous grin grew on his handsome face.

“And do you, Rover, take David Sawyer as your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse; for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?”

“I do. I do. I really do.” the eldest Y/L/N stuttered, radiating happiness with a smile so big you could almost see the teeth in the back of his mouth.

Y/N let out a breath she didn’t know she had been holding, taking her hand to her chest as she internally cheered for the couple while Jack gave her a thumbs up from his seat.

“Now, I understand the grooms have a few words to say to each other.” the septuagenarian divulged, turning to face River. “Go ahead, kid.”

Everyone’s eyes were fixated on the groom once again, but his bore into David’s, wanting him to know she meant every word she was about to say.

“We met at a time in my life where I had pretty much given up on the idea of finding you. You, a kind, smart, extremely funny man, who loves me endlessly. David, you took a man circumstance had turned into a skeptic and made him believe he could fall in love again without having to worry about the possibility of having his heart broken. You took the shattered pieces scattered over my chest and put them together with so much patience and love… I could never thank you enough for that. But I can try… And I will, for the rest of our lives.”

David drew a shaky breath, trying to keep the tears in his eyes from falling. Not because he was ashamed of crying, but because he still had his vows to proclaim and he knew once the first few droplets fell, he wouldn’t be able to speak.

“River…” he croaked, clearing his throat after as the blushing groom reached up and wiped the sneaky tear that had escaped his right eye. “Thank you for loving me when I’m happy, when I’m sad, when I’m annoyed and when I’m obnoxious, when I can’t stop talking about things I like and things I can’t stand. Standing here with you today, in the presence of our closest friends and family, I do not regret any of the time we spent together, not even the dumbest fights or that week we decided to break up a few years ago. In the end, we always ended up clinging onto each other, saying we’re sorry. No matter what, we always bounced back. Together. It was all worth it. The good, the bad and the ugly. We’re here. We made it, baby. I solemnly swear to never question your very questionable eating habits, or the reasons why you know the lyrics to every cringy song in the books. I vow to cherish and appreciate you as long as you’ll have me… And long after that because I love you more than words can say. Believe me when I say I do.”

“Beautiful, beautiful words.” the officiant noted. “Now… The rings.”

Sean pulled out a small black velvet box from his blazer’s inner pocket and Y/N looked at her thumb, where the ring that she had been entrusted with rested.

David’s brother handed him the open box, letting him take the stunning wedding band from it.

“Repeat after me as you place the ring on your groom's finger: with this ring, I thee wed.”

“With this ring, I thee wed.” David almost whispered, reluctantly letting go of his soon-to-be-husband's hand for her to get his matching gold band.

“River…” Mr. Brennan motioned to the designer with an encouraging smile.

The doctor took the band from her thumb and quickly gave it to her brother, grinning like a happy fool, letting out a tiny squeal only Jack seemed to hear, as he covered his face with his hands to stifle a laugh.

“With this ring, I thee wed.” River said in a sing-song voice, eager to hear the officiant's concluding words.

“By the power invested in me by the state of New York, I now pronounce you husband and husband. You may now kiss the groom!”

David stumbled back as his groom flung herself into his arms, kissing him passionately, while everyone around them cheered, clapping enthusiastically. You could feel the love that irradiated from the married couple and that brought happiness to their friends and family.

The maid of honor hurried to straighten up River's jacket he walked down the aisle with his husband, white rose petals falling over and around her beautiful figure. She looked… What was the word? Ethereal. Y/N was a fallen angel. Jack's heart sped up its pace when she looked his way and smiled, for the millionth time that day, scrunching up her nose the way only she knew how to.

He couldn’t keep it in anymore. He was undeniably infatuated with a woman he often held up on a pedestal. He had to say something.

In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take.

#y/n x jack hughes #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes blurb #jack hughes #team usa #hockey #hockey boys #trevor zegras #cole caufield #alex turcotte #quinn hughes #luke hughes #fanfiction #blurb

[wr0temyway0ut]

Hey dude hey, okay so I want to know about so so many of this but pretty please tell me about king boy alex who’s having lots of emotions 🙏🏻

Thank you for the ask Kyleigh!!

This au my beloved <3 It's my unhinged poly arranged marriage royalty au (I actually have 2 of those but this one is my favorite).

So basically how it goes is Prince Alexander's parents decide he needs to be married so they arrange a marriage between him and Princess Lucinda (aka Luke), who is trans but not out to his parents. And their whole honeymoon is Alex being like "oh no I can't get to close bc she actually likes me but I'm gay" and Luke being like "oh no I really like him but he must be pushing me away bc he knows I'm not a woman" and then they both accidentally confess to each other and actually fall in love now that they know they're both men interested in men.

But then Alex's parents find out that Luke is a man (and is intent on living as one) and since royals can't get divorced, they decide to tell the kingdom that "Princess Lucinda" has died tragically in her sleep, which allows Luke to transition (Alex's parents are against this part but Luke's parents ended up being supportive so they were kinda forced to go along with it).

But Alex is once again wifeless. So they decide, okay, you blew it with the "princess," so the next best thing is marrying Duke Covington's daughter, Lady Wilhelmina (aka Willie). Alex is planning on telling Willie that he's gay in an attempt to get him to call the marriage off, but he realizes almost immediately how abusive Caleb is and tells Willie "look I will marry you to get you out of there but I need you to know I'm gay and this is my husband who used to be my wife." And Willie is like "thank god bc I'm a man too" and Alex and Luke are like "a man you say 👀 did we happen to mention how handsome you are" and they bring Willie into their relationship. When Willie is ready, they tell Alex's parents that Alex's wife is once again his husband now and they tell the kingdom that Princess Wilhelmina has tragically died in a fire (he was a known arson enthusiast).

Aaand once again Alex needs a new wife bc there are still no heirs (and any made with Luke and Willie would be illegitimate). Alex's parents are running out of eligible women, but they meet Duchess Regina Peters (who runs the estate with her twin brother Reggie, or at least that's what Reggie, who is genderfluid and is also Regina, wants the world to think). And they're like you seem female and eligible will you marry our son. And Reggie's like yeah sure why not, except when he finds out Alex is gay he shows up to the wedding in Man Mode and it starts a riot but Alex finds a way to make the marriage go through anyway (maybe that they put Regina on the marriage certificate idk). And then two weeks later "Duchess Regina" is tragically trampled by sheep.

Alex's parents are exhausted. They're furious. They're 99% convinced Alex has hired a witch to turn all his fiances into men. And they're like fuck it. This time you pick a woman (bc maybe he's turning them all into men bc he doesn't like that his parents picked them.) And Alex sees an opportunity here. Bc back when Luke first came out, Alex's sister had a lady in waiting named Robin. And Robin had confided in Luke and Alex that he was trans as well. And so when Alex's parents say "you pick" he immediately points at Bobby and says "That one." (important to note that he did not consult with Bobby on this beforehand, Bobby nearly chokes on his food). And after they get married, Bobby comes out and suddenly Lady Robin has tragically drowned.

So now Alex has four husbands who are also in love with each other and still no wives, and it's at this point that Lady Julie (Luke's lady-in-waiting who just kinda stuck around after Luke's legal death) is like "You know I'd marry you to get your parents off your back right?"

And so Julie and Alex get married, and after she stays a woman for a year Alex's parents finally relax. And then Julie gets pregnant! And they're so happy that they finally step down and let Alex take the throne. Except... how is Julie pregnant? And when she gives birth, why does the baby look nothing like Alex??

Maybe bc after wedding #3 Reggie mentioned to Alex that he has a friend from school who is a trans woman named Flynn. And maybe Alex decided to hire her as his new royal advisor to give her an opportunity to transition. And maybe just maybe she and Julie fell in love.

And THAT is the tale of King Alexander, his four undead husbands, his wife, his wife's wife, and the royal-ish baby they're all raising together

#this is my favorite au i've ever written methinks #asks #ask games #wips #wip games

[suomeen]

Chapter 4: Hyvää Joulua

We arrived on December 21, which was just a day before the Winter Solstice, the year’s longest night. And winter nights are even longer in Finland. The sun only rose up around 9 and by 15 it got dark. It’s interesting how it moves in the sky too. It rises about 30% above the horizon, goes “nope!” and goes down again.

We stayed at the house of my mother’s Ukrainian friend, or rather, her Finn husband, Markku. He lives far from civilization, out on a hill among fields. There’s a rather notable village that’s just 5 minutes’ drive from there, [more on that later], but the house feels very secluded in winter.

Our friend is named Oksana, but in Finland everyone calls her Oona, which is supposedly a local equivalent. Oksana lived in Bucha but thankfully left the country just as the war started. She worked in Finland and met this nice local man. He’s 55, a mechanic who works at a sawmill. He used to live near Helsinki but he hated the city so he moved out into the wild. He’s tall but has a heart of a child. She’s small, 53 but looks 40 at most, a single mother who lost her parents early and had a very tough life. She looks like a kid next to him. They got married within a few months. They take good care of each other.

The next day, we drove to the city. Oksana had a doctor’s appointment and we had to go officiate our visit. Markku dropped her off at the hospital first and took us to the police department. It was a bit nerve-wrecking as we weren’t sure what to expect. I was preparing myself for some degree of humiliation, ready to tell my story to justify them welcoming us and giving us home. There was no humiliation and no hard questions asked. The staff were calm and friendly. When we were done, the young handsome officer said “Dyakuyu!” It felt very misdirected.

We then had to go to the reception centre to fill out all the forms and applications regarding our stay. We knew there shouldn’t be any issues but it was still stressful and confusing. The staff were friendly and almost seemed sorry they couldn’t do more for us. Well, the Finnish staff at least. The few Ukrainians working there always look mildly annoyed. And frankly, I can now understand why.

We took care of all our stuff and were immediately given the keys to our apartment. We went there, dropped off the bags and then left again. We were supposed to pick up Oksana afterwards but things didn’t go as planned. It was supposed to be a checkup, because her blood pressure was getting too high. Turned out 3 of her heart arteries were partly blocked and needed to be fixed. What’s more, they were ready to operate her immediately.

The hospital itself is a large regional medical complex, very spacious and modern. Cozy even, for a hospital. There are pictures on the walls that make it look like a museum. There is also a nice little cafeteria for staff and visitors where we dined. Not to mention the kind of technologies they use. They basically cleared and repaired the arteries without cutting up the chest while watching the process through some kind of 3D imaging.

The surgery went fine but they only cleared one artery, so two more surgeries were needed. But that day, she was home by evening. The bill came in later. She owed them a hefty sum of 42e.

Oksana wasn’t feeling great in the following days and we didn’t either. The stress of the trip was heavy and for days I had a vertigo and a headache. We weren’t going to stay at Markku’s place for a whole week but they insisted we stayed for Christmas and it was an hour-long ride to the city, which was hard on them, so we relented.

I am very unreligious but Christmas is all about traditions so I was curious so see how it was celebrated here. I have to say if there’s one place that’s perfect to spend Christmas in, it’s Finland. Finland on Christmas looks like a place from a Coca-Cola commercial. It’s like they made a set to film it and then forgotten all about it. Small quaint houses covered in snow, perfect pine trees and illumination, it all makes one’s heart warm.

There wasn’t a big celebration, however. Markku brought in a tree and we decorated it. We ate some of the traditional foods, including a number of gooey purees, made from sweet potatoes, beetroots, and carrot. Not a fan. On Christmas eve, we went to a cemetery to put candles. It was already dark and a very solemn sight.

Markku shares the house with his mother who is the head of the family. Around Christmas, many members of the family came to their house to have a nice little gathering. It was a good chance to observe Finns in their natural habitat.

About 15 people came, mostly women. There was no alcohol and no feast, as one would expect, just a few tables set up with tea, coffee and snacks everyone brought in. People just grabbed drinks and snacks and went to hang out wherever they wanted with whoever they wanted. Nobody was dressed up. Literally just regular comfy clothes and no make-up. The only festive elements were a few cutesy headbands with reindeer antlers. Worm by older women. It was a very quiet evening with a family catching up, exchanging sentimental gifts and singing a beautiful song at the end.

A few members tried to talk to me and some expressed their sadness at the things going on in my homeland. But most politely ignored us. Which was fine, I suppose. It was their day and we were just spectators. It didn’t feel right to ruin the innocence of this day. Who know how long they can stay in it?

[littlemixnet]

Little Mix vow they WILL reunite and say ‘we can’t live without each other’ in their LAST interview before hiatus.

THEY have spent 11 years as a group, had five No1 singles, won three Brit Awards and released seven hit albums. But as Little Mix prepare to bow out - for now, at least - they have insisted they are doing it as the best of friends and are doing everything they can to ensure they aren’t pitted against each other as they prepare to launch their post-band solo careers. In an exclusive final print interview with The Sun, just a week before they go their separate ways, Perrie Edwards, Leigh-Anne Pinnock and Jade Thirlwall have revealed their timetables will be carefully managed so there is no way they will put new music out at the same time. Perrie, 28, said: “We’ve all said we will let each other know when we’re going to release so we don’t end up clashing in the charts. We’re rooting for each other, not competing against each other.” Jade, 29, who has signed a solo deal with RCA, added: “It’s just not going to happen. There will be a conscious effort from all of us to make sure of that.” Leigh-Anne, 30, said their friendship was too precious to risk a head-to-head and the fact they remain so tight-knit will mean they’re able to be open with each other about their solo plans. She has recently signed with Warner and said: “We are so close and that’s the thing. We’re all going to be in communication about this the whole time.” In the 11 years since Little Mix were first brought together on The X Factor, they have become Britain’s most successful ever girl band, selling more than 50 million records worldwide and collecting over 22 million monthly Spotify listeners. Next Saturday will see the final performance of their sold-out Confetti tour. It will end with an emotional show which will be livestreamed around the world from London’s O2 Arena – the last chance to catch the girls before they bow out for their hiatus. Perrie, who has also already started working on solo music, said: “Even though it’s a massive, epic show, I think knowing everyone is watching it is going to make it feel super intimate.” However, they are already plotting their comeback as a band and promise they won’t follow the lead of One Direction, who went on their “hiatus” in 2015 and show no signs of reuniting. Perrie said: “Honestly, we haven’t even parted ways yet and we’re already talking about when we’re coming back! We’re like: ‘is two years away enough? Two and a bit years?’.” Jade points out they are parting as the closest of friends and so there’s every reason to get back together sooner rather than later. She said: “You can’t deny our relationship – whenever anyone comes to watch the show or sees us in interviews or on social media it’s pretty obvious that we can’t actually live without each other. We know how phenomenal we are together, so why would we never want to do that again? Change has to happen in life, you have to move on at some point and try new things, but it’s such a comfort to know we have each other to come back to. We don’t know how long this will be for but I’m already ready for that reunion!” MAKING HISTORY There have been plenty of record-breaking Little Mix moments over the last decade, not least when they made history in 2021 by becoming the first girl group to win Best British Band at the Brits. They used their moment to pay tribute to the likes of All Saints, the Spice Girls and Girls Aloud who came before them but were always overlooked. Perrie said: “We couldn’t get our heads around the fact that a girl group hadn’t won it before. There were incredible girl bands before us who deserved that award, but it always went to males. We’d thought there was no way we were ever going to win simply because we’re female, which is kind of s**t. So we were really shocked when we won and we wanted to shout out all those women who were so deserving of it. We’re so grateful to have won that award and it’s a huge deal for us. But it should have happened sooner.” Huddled together in their hotel room today, it’s clear how close the three of them are. Leigh-Anne says that after all the success, they no longer feel like they have anything to prove. She said: “As a girl group we’ve been constantly trying to prove that we’re credible. But this tour I feel like we’re all up there just having fun because we frickin’ earned it.” Jade agrees and says the bond between them is stronger than ever. “People have come and gone throughout the last ten years but this relationship we have has remained and I think that’s very telling. We’ve come through a lot together, all the ups and downs and to get to this point and be as close as we are, I think says a lot about how we’ve grown as women.” MUMS ON TOUR They all laugh when talking about how different the atmosphere is on tour now compared to the party days of the past. Leigh-Anne and Perrie both became mothers within a week of each other last August and say the backstage booze has all been replaced by baby paraphernalia. Perrie said: “It’s all baby bouncers, highchairs, you name it. Life has changed. I mean, we were never exactly rockstars before – it wasn’t like you’d walk into bottles of Jack Daniels all over the place with us having it large. But it is a different dynamic.” Perrie has a boy Axel with Liverpool star Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, 28, while Leigh-Anne has twins with fiancé Andre Gray, 30, who plays for QPR, although she hasn’t made the babies’ names or sex public. She said: “I’m just trying to keep it as private as possible for as long as possible. It was a decision we made at the time because [the attention] was freaking me out a little bit.” Both say that going into rehearsals so soon after giving birth was a challenge. Perrie said: “I feel like me and Leigh-Anne should have had a note from the doctor saying: ‘Perrie and Leigh have baby brain, go easy on them today’. Baby brain is real! Jade would pick up the routine in two seconds and we’d be there for an hour doing the simplest of things and then totally forget what it was. I’ve never struggled so hard for a tour. I thought I was going to die! Our bodies weren’t ready, our minds weren’t ready. If it wasn’t for Jade, keeping the morale up and the positivity going then I don’t know if we’d have made it.” However, Jade said she was in awe of how well the new mums managed everything. “Perrie and Leigh-Anne have had to adapt after having kids and being able to go into full-on rehearsal mode while breastfeeding and having the babies there was so amazing. And then to get on stage and these fabulous costumes! They’ve been incredible. I struggled with rehearsals, never mind having to look after children as well. So I know I’ve had an easier ride.” As for what’s next, they are all playing their cards close to their chests but say they are excited and nervous in equal measure about what the future holds. Jade said: “I’m just stepping into the unknown, I don’t really have a plan! We all sort of have an idea what we want to do and how we want to do it. But personally, I’m going to enjoy not putting pressure on myself to have to do something by a certain time.” Perrie added: “As long as I can sing somewhere and at least someone is listening, I’m happy.” Leigh-Anne said while they hoped to explore lots of avenues, music is where their hearts remain. She said: “I feel like we’ll probably all dabble in a bit of everything, I don’t think we’d ever want to restrict ourselves. But being on stage is everything to me and I can’t picture myself being anywhere else. It’s what we do, isn’t it?”

#little mix #article #6may22

[judgementdaysunshine]

If I never knew you

Pairing: Leia Organa x Fem reader

Description: You and Leia fall in love and neither of you would know what to do without each other

If I never knew you if I never felt this love I would have no inkling of how precious life can be and if I never held you I would never have a clue

You and Leia met after you joined your friend Ben Kenobi and Luke Skywalker on the journey to save her from the empire leading to all your lives changing forever more than any of you could ever know or think of.

How at last I'd find in you the missing part of me in this world so full of fear full of rage and lies I can see the truth so clear in your eyes so dry your eyes

The two of you immediately became friends once you escaped and began your journey of defeating the empire always being the other's backbone from fighting stormtroopers to being the voice of reason in each other's defense when the two of you and the boys got into little arguments before forgiving each other.

And I'm so grateful to you I'd have lived my whole life through lost forever if I never knew you if I never knew you I'd be safe but half as real never knowing I could feel a love so strong and true

Both of you with the help of everyone around you the two of you slowly learned of how you felt for each other and helped bring the two of you together leading to the two of you telling each other how you felt and not too long into staying on Hoth the two of you were together.

And i'm so grateful to you I'd have lived my whole life through lost forever if I never knew you I thought our love would be so beautiful somehow we'd make the whole world bright

The two of you didn't know what the future would bring but no matter what you promised each other that you would always be there for each other and come back to each other and those promises came in tow when you both found out not only were leia and luke siblings but that Darth Vader was their father and truly if it hadn't have been for you being right by her side she truly would be lost and alone.

I never knew that fear and hate could be so strong all they'd leave us were these whispers in the night but still my heart is saying we were right if I never knew there's no moment I regret if I never felt this love since the moment that we met

You both knew that once the war was over and you both settled somewhere safe mostly likely somewhere in or near Bespin that the two of you would get married in the near future knowing how much you truly loved each other.

I would have no inkling of our time has gone too fast how precious life can be I've lived at last I thought our love would be so beautiful somehow we'd make the whole world bright

Everyone helped her plan the proposal on Endor while everyone celebrated the loss of the empire and safety of the world dancing with the ewoks until leia started telling you how much you meant to her and proposed to you in front of everyone with cheers as the two of you hugged and kissed each other with tears of joy.

I thought our love would be so beautiful we'd turn the darkness into light and still my heart is saying we were right we were right and if I never knew you if I never knew you

The two of you lived in Bespin city planning and having your wedding in endor with Lando officiating,baby ewoks as flower children,R2 as ring bearer,Luke walking leia down the aisle,and han walking you down the aisle with leia wearing a green dress and you in a pink dress celebrating the happiest days of your lives with the people you love.

I'd have lived my whole life through empty as the sky never knowing why lost forever if I never knew you

The two of you later moved to Hanna City on Chandriia having your son Ben through IVF months after moving them having your twins who you both ended up naming Jaina and Jacen,and a few years later your youngest daughter Vaela living your lives together soon forming the Resistance and fighting the First Order.

#leia organa x reader #star wars #leia organa #star wars x reader

[system-reset]

I think there's a fundamental lack of understanding as to why we struggled so much with school, and, even moreso, a lack of understanding that we were struggling with school from the very beginning. not even our mom seems to understand the entirety of it, and that's frustrating.

everyone who knows us understands one or two parts of it, but not the whole, and that sucks because it's so hard to put into words. but here I'm going to just that: put it into words.

pre elementary school (preschool and kindergarten) was difficult for us for pretty simple reasons. we've always been anxious and it's always been hard for us to be around other people. obviously we've come a long way with that, but it's still difficult. add a dash of adhd and autism (unnoticed, or perhaps misidentified as normal behavior for a 3-5 year old somehow), as well as some difficult family dynamics (which we didn't understand at the time, being a toddler and all) and you've got a very large struggle for a very little human. not to mention we were always the youngest in our class, from the very beginning, because our birthday was just a tiny bit before the cutoff. that wouldn't be much of an issue until later though.

early elementary school. at this point we were beginning to understand some things. unfortunately sometimes understanding has harsh consequences. by 3rd grade we'd begun to understand that they thought we were special, but we weren't sure in which direction yet. we also understood, at this point, that our family was not as happy as it appeared from the outside. combine that with all the previously mentioned issues and you've started to make a deeply messed up person.

by late elementary, we had pieced together that we were the good kind of special. in 6th grade we had a basic understanding of what this meant. in 5th grade, our family truly started falling apart. I remember that morning vividly. we got to class crying, because our parents had informed us of their plan to divorce, and the previous night we'd been up late hiding on the stairwell crying because they'd been yelling at each other. this is where it really started going wrong.

in 7th grade we realized we weren't cis. we remembered what happened to mom when she came out. we were scared. by 9th grade we'd refined our understanding of ourselves a bit, and we came out to everyone. also in 9th grade we went to the emergency room for the first time, with many scars. by the time 8th grade had come up, we were no longer doing nearly as well in our classes. you know. because that's what happens when people don't teach you the skills they think you don't need because you're special and other people hurt you on purpose every day.

in 10th grade we went to the emergency room again. this time we were admitted to the psych ward. they do that if you're threatening your own life, y'know. but they never seem to care about the root of the issue. sent us home after a couple weeks, and we quickly returned to our pre-psych ward state. didn't tell anyone again though, because we didn't see the point. we missed the first 3 weeks or so of 11th grade because we'd moved to live with our mom and we weren't yet enrolled in a school here. it's hard to fit in when you show up out of nowhere at the end of the first month of the school year. shockingly, we passed all our classes in both 11th and 12th grade despite a serious lack of trying. I mean at that point we'd just spent actual years living as someone we weren't because of what a couple of assholes thought was the "right thing" for us, been consistently told that we're either special and meant to save the world or whatever or extremely stupid and worthless, and at that point? we still thought we were responsible for the huge hole that got torn in our family. not to mention in 12th grade, during our final course of the year (taken over the summer) our mom was hospitalized for 6 months.

so no, we don't hate school for 1 reason. we hate school for a myriad of reasons. and I think maybe we still hate ourselves too.

#phoenix 🔥

[steverodgerslater]

Cheating with boyfriends best friend

A little backstory first: my boyfriend 'Jack' and I are living together in one of the bigger cities in our country. When his best friend 'John' got dumped by his girlfriend and lost his job last year, my boyfriend offered him to stay with us for a while to get back on his feet. John moved in the spare bedroom and everything was great for a while. He got a new job close to where we live, he started paying rent, helped out with the chores, and was overall the perfect guest. Since the arrangement worked well for everybody, we decided to continue it.

Earlier this year Jack got a big promotion at work and while that came with a lot of extra income, it also came with longer hours. He usually came home from the office after 9pm, leaving little quality time. It was the topic of most discussions we had, but ultimately I knew he was happy with his work so I didn't want to force him to choose. It was during this time that I connected with John. His schedule was similar to mine, it was always the two of us having dinner together while Jack was still at work. We watched the same series, we started going to the gym together.

One day Jacks mom was planning to visit us, but Jack got called to the office last minute. John and I made a nice dinner for Jacks mom and when she was about to leave, she made a strange remark about John and me looking like the couple instead of Jack. We both laughed a little nervously, but that was the first time something clicked in my mind. The weeks after that I caught myself thinking about John in a different way. I felt guilty about it, it wasn't who I normally was. I tried to oppress these thoughts but something inside me had changed.

Jack and I started having more discussions about his work schedule, we barely had any time together at that point. He promised to take me out on a proper date night later that week, and I was hopeful things woud finally change. That night I was getting ready when Jack called me something came up at work and he had to postpone our night out. I was so mad I yelled at him and hung up. I was crying when John came in. He comforted me and when I was feeling a little better, he offered to take me out instead. He got ready quickly while I redid my makeup, and he took me on the date night Jack was supposed to take me. We went to a fancy restaurant, and to a bar afterwards. I was pretty tipsy when we got back, Jack was still at the office. John outdid himself in making me feel good again, he gave me many compliments and made me laugh the whole night. He put on some music and danced in a goofy way, soon joined by me. Then I bumped into the coffee table and lost my balance, I tried holding onto John but he also fell and he landed on top of me on the couch. His face was just a few centimeters from mine, we weren't laughing anymore. For a few seconds nothing happened, we were just staring at each other. I don't know if he made the first move or I did, but then we kissed. We made out for several minutes, it got me all worked up and I started unbuttoning Johns pants. He looked at me with a look that said 'are you sure?', but when I told him to fuck me he didn't hesitate anymore. He fucked me then and there on the couch. No time wasted taking off our clothes, he just dropped his pants a little and moved my panties to the side. He didn't hold back when he fucked me, he was so good. We kept making out as he was fucking me, my legs wrapped around his waist and my nails in his back. It was liberating, I knew I was cheating but that taboo made me a little freaky in that moment. Between making out I kept telling John to fuck me, and when he grunted he was about to cum I locked my legs around his waist and whispered to cum inside me. He lost it, and with a few deep thrusts he came inside me. We kept making out a little longer.

We just finished cleaning up and rearranging our clothes when we heard Jacks keys in the door. It felt awkward but I was still mad at Jack so I had a good excuse to go to sleep. It was a strange feeling, I had cheated but I didn't feel remorse. My friends would never expect this from me, they know me as a classic good girl. That night changed everything for me, and it became a regular thing. Several months went by where my relationship with Jack deteriorated further while I was fucking John almost every day. At some point I realized I couldn't continue like this, and I was ready to end things with Jack but that's when he actually started making an effort. He didn't want to lose me so he changed jobs, worked regular hours, and started spending a lot more time with me. It probably saved our relationship, but I couldn't spend as much time with John as I wanted. I could not get him out of my mind, not even while Jack was making such efforts. I knew Jack would be better for me in the long run, but I couldn't resist the wild feeling that John gave me every time. The fact that John was living with us didn't help, we had to find creative ways to still "see" each other. John offered to stop things between us if it would help me, but I couldn't stop it.

Today the situation is even more complex. Jack was pretty desperate in mending our relationship but it was hard for him to top John in the bedroom. He obviously didn't know about John, but he must have felt it was still lacking in that area. So he got a few books on how to spice things up, we played a few dirty games together and eventually started watching porn together to get some inspiration. When we watched threesome scenes it eventually got us where we are today, where I convinced Jack to have a threesome with me and John.

Valvalval29OP·1 day ago

Maybe the taboo of cheating makes it hotter somehow

So you’re still fuckn his best friend??😈

Valvalval29OP·1 day ago

Yes

#confessions #friendcheat

[gremlinasis]

18 - I've been wandering

Two years and a bit later and I'm in a completely different life.

Short summary: I stayed with my ex after she cheated, we got over it but the feeling she had that she wasn't ready for a serious relationship loomed over us. Beside that I was progressing through my studies and I graduated with honors in July of 2022. Quickly after I took an an engineering job at a multinational.

The job didn't really match with me and I was constantly out of the country and away from my friends and my ex. It weighed a lot on me and my relationship, which was going through more downs than ups at that point with me being in a bad place generally and her still longing for her independence from a partner. It got better for a while in the beginning of this year, but she left on a semester abroad in February and that's when things started changing.

She didn't want me to stay too close during that time, she was too far away for me to be able to visit without preparation and she didn't want me to plan any visits or really to talk to me too much. For the first two months I kept a daily sort of diary for her about my life with short notes about things I would love to tell her that day, reading it back now it's heartbreaking because you can see me falling apart slowly. After a few months it all cracked. Me sending her that I loved her would make her cringe and just in general anything that referenced us as romantic partners would make her close off.

At that point my mental health started shattering. I hated my job and I knew I was losing my relationship. Because I was away so often it was also hard to get support from my friends, I was living far away from them and I was too lonely to get myself out of it. So I started to go to a therapist.

Slowly I worked on understanding myself better, to give myself the space to think and to process what was going on in my head and my heart.

Once my ex came back it was clear we were done. It took about a month and a half where I saw her maybe 4 times before we finally sat together and told each other we couldn't do this anymore. From her perspective she couldn't be in a relationship right now and from mine I couldn't be someone that was the worst part of someone's day. It was destroying me to be actively unwanted, not necessarily for who I am but for simply filling a role that she didn't have room for. So we ended it after three years together.

A week later I sent an e-mail asking about PhD positions to my thesis promotor, three days later he responded that he wanted to look into it with me and I went to pride and kissed my friends (I had a situation with one of them after that also broke off, which is a whole other story), four days after pride I booked a meeting with my promotor and quit my job. Three weeks later I got a PhD position which is what I'm currently spending my days with.

Life is still difficult to navigate, but I need to be grateful as well that I'm here now. If the me of April this year would see me now, I think she'd cry. I'm not where I want to be yet, not professionally, personally or mentally, but I got myself out of my lowest point.

I'm dealing with a lot still. My ex and I still talk and it's clear that we still haven't finished this completely. There is a lot of love left there from both sides and it's not clear to me where my romantic life is going to head. I want to be loved well though, I understand now that I need to be actively wanted. I need a partner that wants me around as their standard, I want to be with someone that wants to take steps with me (in due time), someone that wants to move in together, that wants to have a life together, so we aren't just updating each other about our separate lives, that we live a part of each others life as well.

But I also think I need to literally & figuratively fuck around a little before I can try doing that again.

My next step is moving out of home, I don't know when that will be, but I'm working on it.

So yes, a lot has happened as of late, curious to see where next my life is gonna lead.

#18

[eldritch-queern-magicat]

So there are things that happened since childhood with our system shenanigans that help explain things, like why my mind seems so warped. I introject from every story I get attached to. I'm not sure how to even turn it off at this point. So with all the media on our Dish Network plan, well. Oh, here we go...

See, when I got a little bit older, my parents decided it was ok for me to watch other anime that was a bit more mature. I got attached to the protagonists, and sometimes the antagonists. I deeply loved anime. Well, generally, I loved cartoons, as long as they weren't like extra brain-rottingly stupid. I did love wacky hijinks from a young age, though, thank you, Boomerang. I had started on Pokémon at about age six. It was grand.

During middle school, as I finally caved some to peer pressure, I started really watching Disney sitcoms. I sort of made myself like them, though in a certain way, Hannah Montana actually did appeal to me. Plus there was music and Billy Ray Cyrus. Prior to that, I only really enjoyed sci-fi, fantasy, or mystery shows.

The chaos of combining those all together in my head is something even I'm struggling to comprehend. It was complete and utter chaos. Charles helped by inadvertently teaching me to embrace my inner weird and inner nerd in middle school. He also actively encouraged my own love of video games. We met in my sixth grade year, and he just so happened to live on the other side of the same community I was in.

And I didn't have anyone around until high school to tell me I was being immature for doing stuff like playing make-believe as a teenager. Blame my youngest aunt, she has this whole superiority complex about her and really looks down on my dad. Not that I let her totally stop me, I just got even better at doing it in secret. I had to tone down playing with my younger cousins some over time, but my personal shenanigans were almost ramped up as a consequence. We still had a big yard to play and run around in. It was flat, but still fun (I really missed the mountains).

Other parts have mentioned reading a good part of Death Note at that time. And having read much of the manga in the library, or at least giving it a shot. I have bought manga from my school's book fair. I became obsessed with manga, and even watched anime in subtitles online. It wasn't all dark like Death Note, of course. There were lighter ones like Fruits Basket.

All of that going on, when I began learning to channel my ideas into stories and teaching myself how to draw. My favorite media had so much impact on plot and character ideas, because of the specific impact they had on me as a person. Those characters were the many ways my parts came out to express themselves. Even now, most prominent characters were self-inserts.

For one Christmas, I got Kingdom Hearts 365/2 Days. That became a very deep love of mine, and the dissociation explains perfectly why I identified actually pretty hard with the Nobodies. Then Charles let me borrow Final Fantasy VII Advent Children to watch.

From there, specifically because of those two fandoms I still love, I met the person I later thought was my ‘twin flame’ over Quizilla. Our general friendship goes back over eleven years. We met in person once, in 2017. It was fun, but we had built up a whole fantasy around each other before the end of the delusions. My mind was always geared towards fantasy as an escape. She was in a similar situation, but her parents were the awful ones most of the time.

My life has been nothing but chaos and it's reflected in my headspace. It feels like living in constant liminality. Unless you have a map, it's even easy to get lost. It's like I have a whole little universe in myself. Like. A miniverse. There is a miniverse in my head.

(Started by Elo, and worked on by Thyme.)

-Bryan 💀😺

#dissociative identity disorder #alters #did #did system #dissociation #introjects #fictrojects #imaginary friends #imaginary adventures #playing make-believe #complicated family #polyfrag system #polyfragmented #system shenanigans #creative writing #writing #art #drawing #stories #original characters #delusions #escapism #abusive home #multiverse #shenanigans #long post #personal shit

[breatheeasy808]

Day 11- Another picture of you and your friends

This is a photo of me and my two bandmates Sid Pang and Taylor Bourgeois. Sid and I went to the same high school in Hawaii—he was three grades below me and was good friends with the younger brother of a high school classmate that I was close to at the time. We only begun hanging out with each other, however, after I had already graduated from college and when we both found ourselves back on the island, typically during summer or winter breaks. Some fond memories of the early stages of our friendships include day tripping at Hunakai Beach in his Kahala neighborhood, seeing local reggae phenomenon Mike Love live in concert, getting stoned and watching SpongeBob, and enjoying an overnight getaway at his extended family's beach house in Punalu'u. When I was still applying to graduate programs in Fall 2019, I told him I was planning to apply to Tulane University in New Orleans. He told me he was also applying to Tulane as well for medical school. We promised to keep each other posted with our admissions result when the time came. As it turns out, we both got accepted at Tulane for our respective programs and we both committed to the school, pleased to know that we would have a local connection with one another as we both moved to a new city to begin the next phase of our lives.

In New Orleans, Sid introduced me to Taylor, one of his medical school classmates originally from Houston, TX whom he befriended during their orientation after she shared a fun fact about herself being a musician. When we gathered one night at my house over a bottle of wine and a bowl of weed to get to know each other and play some music, Taylor impressed both me and Sid with her original songwriting and earnest musicianship. With Taylor on acoustic guitar, Sid on ukulele (and later bass guitar and saxophone), and me on banjo and mandolin, we quickly became an inseparable trio and would meet at least once a week to play music and enjoy each others' company.

Moving to a new city in the middle of the pandemic was not the most conducive to cultivating a thriving social life. Most of the people I would see and spend time with on a regular basis that first year of grad school happened to be medical students that I knew through Sid and Taylor. But undeterred by the lockdowns, we would gather in a small group of four to nine people to watch the latest UFC fights, drink some wine, beer, and hard seltzers, barbecue some meat, throw a bonfire in my backyard, and of course play some music for our friends. We dubbed our trio Taylor & the Bruddahz, a tongue-in-cheek nod to Sid and I both being from Hawaii, and we all took turns doing lead vocals for our eclectic mix of country, island jams, folk, and popular music. After months of just jamming around the bonfire with each other for fun, we played our debut show at Bourrée, a Cajun BBQ joint in our neighborhood for a sizable crowd of Tulane med students, friends, and Taylor's extended family. The manager at Bourrée enjoyed our performance so much (along with the impressive revenue generated from our fanbase) that after our show we were invited to be the resident band performing there once a month.

This photo was taken after our first gig there on Easter Sunday 2021, and we received a whole basket of freshly boiled crawfish as a gift for being the performing artists that day. We all planned to live together in New Orleans in the same house this last year, with Sid and Taylor taking over vacancies from my previous two roommates, and we even spent a few weeks decorating the house and enjoying the fellowship with each other before I soon got sick and hospitalized in Texas after evacuating from Hurricane Ida.

Through the saga of my hospitalization, Sid and Taylor went above and beyond the call of duty to help me and my family out during an incredibly difficult and stressful time. They both helped me pack up all my personal belongings, boxing them away to be securely stored in a facility until my return, and handled the logistics of communicating with Tulane's administration about my medical leave of absence and forwarding all my mail to my current address in San Diego. By the time I am expected to return to New Orleans sometime in 2023 to resume my schooling, I will most likely complete my Master's program at the same time Sid and Taylor will be finishing their fourth year of medical school. It seems like the band has been on hiatus after I took leave, as I am sure that Sid and Taylor have both been sufficiently preoccupied with their studies to focus on playing regular shows without me, but I eagerly anticipate the day that we will be reunited, me with my brand new lungs and second chance at life, and Sid and Taylor ready to welcome me back to my third home in New Orleans and strike up the band all over again.

[caitimetravels]

she's insignificant

chapter 10: where you've gone

the umbrella academy x (fem) reader

disclaimer: i do not own the plot/storyline of the netflix tv series and i do not own the umbrella academy characters.

warnings: none

masterlist

with a sigh, y/n stood. five was still writing away behind her on the walls non-stop. she didn't dare interrupt him, simply leaving. she would be back anyways. all she needed was a nice walk. 

as she wandered down the street with no destination in mind she spaced out, eyes trained on her feet. suddenly someone knocked her shoulder and brought her back to reality. she raised her head, hoping they weren't someone looking to start a fight or argue with her.

"y/n?" instead she was met with allison. her technically older sister seemed frustrated.

"allison? are you okay?" y/n's eyebrows furrowed, looking up at the curly haired woman. 

"yeah.. i think so" she frowned, "i'm worried about vanya. she won't listen to me but her boyfriend, whoever he is.. i think he's dangerous. i couldn't find anything about him-"

"you went searching for his records?" y/n pulled back in disbelief, "allison! you know vanya doesn't like-"

"i know, she already got angry with me" allison sighed, shaking her head.

"why would you do that?" y/n tilted her head up at her, eyes narrowing incredulously. "where are you even going?"

"well, i found his address. i was going to see if anything's weird.." she earned a disapproving look, "i can't just sit around and do nothing y/n! please, help me, for vanya?"

y/n's expression only darkened, "why are you trying to ruin one of the only good things in her life?! she deserves to be happy for once and im not going to help you take that away from her!" she begun to shout, freezing as she realised her powers were getting out of control in the middle of the street. "just.. leave them alone!" 

she took off, hoping to get away, she needed to get away.

————————————————–

as the sweet melody came to soft halt y/n smiled up at her sister. vanya donned a similar grin, placing her violin down and joining y/n on the floor, cross legged and leaning back against her bed.

"one day, you're going to be amazing, v" y/n mumbled quietly, looking like she was in a slight daze, "more amazing than you are now.. you're going to be a famous violinist, i can see it now. 'vanya hargreeves, the world's best violinist'" 

vanya softly nudged her shoulder, shaking her head. "no way, the world? c'mon" 

"i'm serious!" y/n was adamant, sitting up straighter to see her better, "you're gonna be so cool! and everyone here is going to see you and say 'damn, wish i had seen how awesome our sister was back then' and you're going to have lots of fans!"

vanya snorted, shyly brushing her long hair to the side, "yeah, right"

".. you won't forget me when you're famous, right?" y/n leaned back against the bed to avoid direct eye contact, her voice was much softer now. "don't forget me.. okay?" she nervously side eyed her sister, trying to gauge her reaction.

"i could never" vanya shook her head, leaning into the h/c haired girl. both of them shared small content grins.

————————————————–

as she walked upstairs to five's room she heard a commotion, hopefully he hadn't gotten into a fight with one of their siblings again, right?

wrong.

"put her down" five snarled, holding a gun up to luther who held dolores' body out the window. y/n grinned at the sight, highly amused. who would have thought luther would ever threaten someone? well, y'know excluding their missions.. but five nonetheless? she leaned casually against the doorway, arms crossing and waiting for them to sort out whatever issue she walked in on.

"put the gun down, you're not killing anyone today. i know she's important to you so don't make me do this" luther paused, waiting to see what five would do. "it's either her or the gun.. you decide"

eventually five did decide that dolores was more important and dropped the gun before spacial jumping to catch dolores before she could fall. not that much damage would have occurred to the mannequin anyways, maybe a few scratches.

"i can keep doing this all day" luther spoke triumphantly, now holding the gun at his side. y/n snorted, catching their attention.

"you're such children" both glared at her in response, "c'mon, surely you have a better plan than whatever ended up in this-" she gestured vaguely between them, "squabble"

"we did not squabble" five hissed, placing dolores down and straightening his jacket. "but yes, i do have a one other plan" 

————————————————–

the three of them, five, luther and y/n, drove down an empty road before slowing to a stop. five unbuckled his seatbelt and sighed, looking around.

"you know, i never enjoyed it" he started and luther turned to him in confusion.

"what?"

"the killing. i mean i was- i was good at my work and i took pride in it but it never gave me pleasure" he took a deep breath, "i think it was all those years alone. solitude can do funny things to the mind"

"yeah well, you were gone for such a long time.. i only spent four years on the moon but that was more than enough. it's the being alone that breaks you" luther placed a hand on the briefcase, "you think they'll buy it?"

"well, what i do know is that they're desperate. it's like a cop losing his gun" he alluded, "if the commission finds out they'll be in deep shit, well not to mention that they'll be stuck here until they get it back"

"i should hold onto it" luther suggested, patting it with one hand.

"hm?" five's eyebrows furrowed,

"incase they make a move on you" he added to explain his point.

"okay, luther.. but be careful. i've lived a long life but.. you're still a young man, you've got your whole life ahead of you. don't waste it" y/n snorted and five turned to her, unamused.

"what?" they stared at each other for a moment before five shook his head, looking away with a small smile.

suddenly a car began to drive towards them and they all made to get out of the car. "here we go" five sighed again, he was doing that a lot, y/n realised.

the car continued to drive past them, stopping a few metres away.

"if this all goes sideways.. do me a favour and tell dolores i'm sorry" five turned to luther who nodded slowly.

as five walked away from them y/n leaned back against the car.

"i have a bad feeling about this" she nervously picked at her nails and luther frowned, looking over at her.

"why? what's wrong?"

"that.. i don't know yet" she looked down the road, "i just.. feel like something's off" she shook her head as five walked back, leaning next to her.

luther stepped forwards a bit, "what happens now?"

"now we wait" 

barely a moment later they heard the music of an ice cream truck. y/n squinted against the sun and wind, trying to work out who it was. she took a moment to focus, sensing klaus, diego and ben. uh oh.

as the car got closer luther turned to five, "is that her?"

"luther, you idiot" y/n shook her head, "it's klaus and diego" right on time klaus waved to them as they passed.

the two assassins begun shooting, thinking it was a set up and y/n raised her arms to cover her head as luther stepped in front of her and five to block any shots.

suddenly time stopped.. well, only for five.

he frowned down at y/n next to him, the girl cowering in on herself. he felt bad for bringing her into something like this but she was very persistent.

he slowly stepped under luther's arm, looking at everyone frozen in slight confusion.

"neat trick, isn't it?" a feminine voice called out behind him and he turned to face the woman he had asked to see. the handler. she stared at him, pulling the veil over her face up and onto her hat instead before pulling her sunglasses off.

"hello, five" she smiled, "you look good.. all things considered" she softly gestured to all of him.

"it's good to see you again" he nodded back,

"feels like we met just yesterday, 'course you were a little bit older then" she teased, "congratulations on the age regression, by the way. very clever, threw us all off the scent"

"ah, well, i wish i could take credit" five shrugged, looking away. "i just miscalculated the time dilation of projections and.. well, you know, here i am" his gaze met hers once again, throwing his hands up before putting them back in his pockets, casually.

"you realise your efforts are futile" the handler shifted so that her briefcase was behind her, "so, why don't you tell me what you really want?"

"i want you to put a stop to it" five moved his own hands behind his back. 

"you realise what you're asking for is next to impossible even for me" she shook her head, "what's meant to be is meant to be. that's our raison d'etre" 

"yeah?" five smiled sarcastically, pulling a gun from his shorts "well how about survival as a raison?" 

"i'll just be replaced, i am but a small cog in a machine" the handler waved it off, ignoring the gun pointing straight at her heart. "this fantasy you've been nurturing about summoning up your family to stop the apocalypse is just that.. a fantasy. i must say though, we'll quite impressed with your initiative, your stick-to-it-tiveness, really quite- quite something. which is why we want to offer you, a new position back at the commission, in management" the handler held a hand up, smiling like her offer was an obvious choice.

"sorry what's that now?" five scoffed as she stepped closer, hand tightening on the gun.

"come back to work for us again, you know it's where you belong" 

"well, it didn't work out too well the last time" he glared up at her, not liking the persistence.

"oh but you wouldn't be in the correction department any longer, i'm talking about the home office, you'd have the best health and pension and an end to this ceaseless travel" she laughed freely, "you're a distinguished professional in.. school boy shorts. we have the technology to reverse the process. i mean you- you can't be happy like this" she slowly pushed his gun down, stepping ever closer.

"i'm not looking for happy" he spat through gritted teeth.

the handler only tilted her head, eyeing him carefully before raising a hand to stroke his cheek, "we're all looking for happy. we can make that happen, we can make you.. yourself again"

five huffed a laugh, gesturing to his siblings. "what about my family?"

"what about them?" the handler raised an eyebrow, acting like she didn't already know he intended to save them.

"i want them to survive" 

the handler took in a deep breath, taking in the sight of luther protecting y/n who was still crouching against the car as well as diego and klaus who were in the middle of crashing the ice cream truck.

"all of them?" 

"yes, all of them" he narrowed his eyes at her,

the handler gave him a small smirk, moving towards the recoiled girl. five watched carefully, waiting to see what she would do.

"it's such a shame.. she would have done well with us. if only we could take her too" she reached a hand out, about to touch her but five moved first, spacial jumping in front of her and grabbing her hand. he held her away from y/n.

"don't touch her" he snarled, unmoving from his protective stance. 

"my my, five, i didn't expect such protectiveness from you" the handler merely smirked, stepping away. as they walked back she once again proposed her deal.

"well" the handler begun, reaching a hand into her pocket and pulling out her sunglasses before putting them back on her face. "i'll see what i can do from them.. do we have a deal?" she reached a hand out to him, awaiting his acceptance. he merely stared at her hand before sighing,

"one thing" five stepped back, putting his gun in his shorts again. he walked over to hazel's gun on the floor, taking out the ammunition and chucking it on one side of the road before chucking the rest of the gun to the other. he turned and walked back, noticing the bullet headed towards luther and y/n. he frowned, using his pointer finger and thumb to move it over so that it would hit the car instead of them.

as soon as he shook her outstretched hand they disappeared and time was restored.

y/n shivered, ignoring the bullet hitting the car next to her and the way her siblings scrambled around to get away quick. she allowed herself to be shoved into the car with klaus and diego, spaced out.

"you alright?" diego turned to her while klaus stuck the middle finger up at hazel and cha cha. 

"i felt someone else.. it was only for a moment but i felt someone.." she spoke solemnly, staring at her shaking hands. "and then five just.. disappeared"

tag list: (if your name is crossed i couldnt tag you) @rxses-and-reverie @lostgreekgod @on-yourmark-99 @bicyhot1 @navs-bhat @midnightmystic @shawkneecaps @baby-bi-bi-bi-yeah @velveticxyyy

#tua #the umbrella academy #tua x sibling reader #the umbrella academy x sibling reader #five hargreeves #diego hargreeves #allison hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #vanya hargreeves #luther hargreeves #ben hargreeves #five hargreeves x reader #diego hargreeves x reader #allison hargreeves x reader #klaus hargreeves x reader #vanya hargreeves x reader #luther hargreeves x reader #ben hargreeves x reader

[gladerwolfstarkimagines]

Imagine being Azula’s friend but secretly dating Zuko behind her back

One of the first things you and Azula bonded over was your annoying brothers. Azula told you how her brother had stolen one of her best friends away from her and you related to that. Your twin brother was none other than Sokka of the water tribe, who was also very popular with women. Most of the women you knew liked him, from Yue to Toph to Suki to Ty lee! It sometimes felt like you were the second attraction in a friendship and so you and Azula quickly became close over your shared frustrations.

Then....you betrayed her.

Well, betrayal is a bit dramatic but maybe not given how upset she'd been when Mai and Zuko started dating. You knew that had been hard for Azula to process.  How difficult it had been wondering if her friends really liked her or just wanted access to her brother. So when you started liking Zuko you didn’t plan on acting on it at all. Then Mai broke up with him. 

Zuko was around at yours quite often, whenever he visited the water tribe he stayed in your home and when you visited the fire nation he extended the same hospitality. So throughout the years, you just naturally got closer and closer until....it happened. You started hanging out just the two of you and these occasions felt very date-like until Zuko just outright asked you out. You liked him and told yourself one date was fine, what harm could a single date do? But then as you kept seeing each other and one date soon progressed into many many more you knew your time to do the right thing and tell Azula you were dating her brother was approaching. 

However the idea of doing that idea terrified you. You guessed Azula wouldn’t take it well and didn’t want to lose your friendship with her because of your relationship with Zuko. You wouldn’t break up with Zuko just to make her happy but you also didn’t want to lose Azula’s friendship, so when Katara’s birthday arose you were fairly nervous. There was going to be a large party and all of Katara’s friends were coming...which included Zuko and Azula. You hadn’t been together with everyone since you and Zuko started dating so you had no idea how it would feel. The whole time you and Zuko would have to convincingly act like you weren’t a couple and not make anyone at the party suspicious of the two of you. So when Zuko’s ship got in you fixed your eyes on Azula and tried not to stare at him any more than usual. You greeted him formally and didn’t admire him as you usually would. You fell in step with Azula and decided just to focus on her. It wasn’t hard, you were best friends and very close...however fate was not on your side. You got seated across from him at dinner which felt like some sick punishment and struggled not to get lulled into conversation with him. It didn’t help that Zuko was in a playful mood. He kept making comments about the things you’d done on your date and then sending you sly looks across the table. When you met his eye he smirked blatantly and you lightly kicked him under the table. That only made Zuko chuckled and look adorable so you sighed and decided to just keep your eyes down the whole time to survive dinner. 

However, Zuko had no intention of stopping his teasing. After dinner you set about preparing the party for Katara tomorrow and having sent Sokka, Aang, Suki, Azula and Toph on their assigned jobs turned to your job of decorating. You were hanging streamers in the living room when you felt a hand curl around your waist. “Need some help there?” Zuko asked moving closer and he leaned up over you to hang it. “I could have done that myself” you smiled turning to face him and Zuko shrugged “I know you could’ve, but then I wouldn’t have been able to do this”. Zuko gently kissed your neck trailing down to your collar bone making you sigh. “Zuko...stop” you said faint heartedly and Zuko sensed that smirking "I don’t want to and you don’t want me to either, I can tell by how softly you said my name" he smiled "it’s been so long since we’ve had any time together". Your skin erupted in goosebumps and a shiver went down your spine as Zuko pressed closer against you. But you knew how badly this could end if literally anyone walked in. So swiftly you grabbed Zuko’s hands and twisted your way out of them. You held them tightly in one hand so he couldn’t try and slink around you again and used the other to make him look at you "Zuko we can’t okay, not on this trip. God knows i want to, i’ve missed you too but there’s too much that could go wrong i’m sorry". Zuko sighed but nodded his head "don’t worry i understand". Zuko’s shoulders sagged and you knew your insistance on keeping this quiet was difficult for him. "Thank you for understanding" you said hugging him quickly "i know it can’t be easy for you and I appreciate the effort you're going to for me". Zuko smiled resting his head on top of yours "it’s fine, i’d do a lot more for you if you asked but promise me it won’t always be like this....we will tell everyone soon?". You gulped but nodded pulling away "i promise, i will tell Azula...soon!". Zuko nodded “I believe you” and let his hands drop away from you. Not a moment later Sokka and Aang appeared in the room making the two of you jump. “Zuko just the man we need! We were thinking of making an ice sculpture, fancy some fire bending?”. Zuko nodded “sure” and with a last glance to you left the room. 

Hours later the party preparations finished you returned to your room which you were sharing with Azula for her visit. “Sokka made me blow up balloons” she said angrily “something about fire benders being full of hot air”. You smirked at your brother’s nerve when Azula’s next sentence wiped it off your face.  "Also I think Zuko’s dating someone again" Azula said softly and you paused. "Ow really?" you asked and she nodded "he’s been spending a suspicious amount of time in the southern water tribe lately. Lots of visits which he claims are diplomatic but I can’t work out what he actually does here! He doesn’t know that many people and so it got me thinking, y/n do you think your brother and mine....". "No Sokka's still with Suki" you said shaking your head. Azula sighed “and it’s obviously not Katara, she and Aang are basically married, have you seen him hanging around anyone else? He doesn’t know many people so it should be easy to spot". You paused pretending to think but were really just trying to buy yourself time. "Honestly i don’t pay much attention to him when he visits" you said cleverly covering your back "but i will from now on and let you know". "Thank you y/n" Azula smiled. You smiled back relieved Azula didn’t suspect anything and let out a large breath you’d been holding for this entire conversation. You were now more than ready for sleep and got into bed hurriedly. You laid your head on your pillow and closed your eyes utterly exhausted. 

"Goodnight y/n" Azula called and you nodded. You were very sleepy and after a long yawn smiled "good night Zuko".

You realised the name you’d said seconds after it came out of your mouth. 

You froze

As did azula.

"Did you just call me Zuko...". You blinked "did i? I’m sure i said Azula". Azula was quiet for 2 seconds before she shot up "it’s you!" she cried "you're the one my brother’s dating!". "No Azula that’s crazy!!! We'd just been discussing Zuko, that’s why he was on my mind!". Azula shook her head "you're lying! I can tell by the tone of your voice! You’re the new girlfriend aren’t you?". You sighed "Azula i’m sorry i was going to tell you...". "I can’t believe you" Azula yelled and suddenly the door opened. "What’s wrong?" Sokka and Zuko asked bursting in “we heard yelling” and Azula glared. "You! Couldn't just have Mai huh? Had to take another one of my friends? How about when you’re done with y/n you try things with Ty lee?". "Ow she told you...." Zuko frowned awkwardly. "No i worked it out!” Azula spat “Y/n accidentally uttered your name because she’s so lovesick" Azula cried "you both make me sick" and she strode away slamming the front door hard as she exited the house.

After Azula left you all looked at one another unsure what to do or say next. "So...you two are a thing?" Sokka asked and Zuko paused "yes...is your reaction going to be as bad as Azula’s or can i go deal with her?". Sokka shook his head "go deal with her before she burns the village down”. Zuko went to move past Sokka when your brother put a hand to his chest "but come back and see me after, me and Katara will want to talk to you about dating our sister". Zuko surprisingly looked intimidated and nodded "I'll be right back". "Zuko wait i should come too" you called "this is as much my fault as yours". Zuko nodded "let’s go" and led you outside into the cold night after Azula.

You found Azula trekking in the snow and as she wasn’t in proper shoes you gained on her quickly. “Azula!” you called and she jumped. She looked around and glared “ow look the happy couple, how nice of you to grace me with your presence”. Zuko rolled his eyes “only you’d be so attention-seeking to make this about you”. “Attention seeking? Who’s the person who can’t form his own friendships or respect boundaries? No always have to date my friends, is it some weird way for you to gain power over me? A sad way to boost your ego?”. As Zuko and Azula went to square up to each other you stepped between them. “Alright enough the both of you! Zuko please go back to the house, i’ll handle this”. “But she...”. “Zuko please” you said sharply and he nodded “fine” and with a glare left. You watched him go before turning back to Azula. You’d been about to suggest you go home given that Azula was surely freezing out here in the middle of the night but Azula broke into a rant. "Everyone leaves me for him" she cried "Mai! My uncle! Mother! Even my father...after i was smarter, a better fire bender, more loyal and younger he still gave Zuko every little chance and only crowned me after Zuko literally ran away! When will i be good enough people don’t just choose him without a second thought for me?". "Azula i didn’t choose Zuko over you! Just because i like Zuko doesn’t mean i don’t like you still". "That may be true but this changes our friendship completely, it did with Mai! People always prioritise their partners over their friends so i’ll be second best once again". "Are you kidding?" you asked "Azula now i need you more than ever! Relationships aren’t when you ditch your friends, they’re when you need them the most! Who else are you going to go to for a break or a nice getaway? Who else is going to support and love you in only the platonic way a friend can? Who else can i complain about Zuko to when he annoys me or we fight?" you asked "they’re all things you need your friends for! Desperately and that’s going to be the same for me". "But when Mai dated him...". "But i’m not Mai" you smiled softly "Azula we are good friends, i won’t sideline you because of this. You mean just as much to me now as before i started dating Zuko". Azula huffed but you could see her melting. "So...how about we go inside, get some warm milk and talk a bit more about this huh?". You offered Azula your hand and she took it but she didn’t stop there. Azula threw her arms around you and hugged you tightly. "I’m partly doing this for the cold but thank you" she said softly "nobodies ever tried to make me feel supported when they've chosen Zuko, they just tell me to deal with it but you’re the first to try and reassure me and so i know you mean it, to still be my friend". "Of course" you smiled "you're my best friend!". Azula smiled and linked her arm through yours "i like that!”. 

Zuko stared in awe as you and Azula returned grinning. "How did it go is everything okay?". You nodded "your extremely cool sister is fine with it". "Yes i thought this would be a great way to have an inside scoop on you zuzu". "She’s kidding i won’t talk to her about you...a lot". Zuko blinked "okay if everything's okay then i should go speak to Sokka and Katara, they’re waiting for me in the kitchen". Azula smiled "that’s a good idea, when you come back zuzu find me, i have some threats about what will happen if you hurt my best friend". You smiled at Azula and stepped to Zuko "good luck but don’t worry Sokka’s all bite, Katara’s the one to look out for but she has a big heart, just tell her how good a time we’ve had and you’ll be fine". "Good tips, any for my sister?". You smiled "Azula is one i have not worked out yet" you grinned "but i’m sure you’ll manage, you are the firelord after all". Zuko smirked and you patted his shoulder "after your appointment with my brother and sister and then your sister....you could always come find me in your room?". Zuko smiled "is that my motivation for surviving this?". You shrugged "you can think of it as that" and stepped away from him. Zuko watched you before sighing "alright let’s get this over with” he said loudly and strode towards the kitchen.

You turned back to Azula who raised an eyebrow at Zuko’s sudden confidence and she frowned. "Do i even want to know?" Azula asked and you shook your head "no". “Ow and don’t worry if I’m not in our room tonight”. “Euch Y/n!” Azula cried and you shrugged “what? I didn’t say why”. “I know why” she sighed before she smiled “at least I can have your bigger bed”. “Be my guest” you smiled, you had a firelord to get reacquainted with. 

#zuko #zuko imagine #zuko x reader #azula imagine #azula #azula x reader #avatar the last airbender #atla #avatar #avatar the last airbender imagine #atla zuko #avatar zuko #atla azula #avatar azula #fire nation #water tribe #firelord zuko #princess azula #fire nation royalty #azula and zuko #sokka #katara #aang #toph #suki #mai #ty lee #yue

[robininthelabyrinth]

I'm pretty sure this is prompt four. Jiang Cheng/Qin Su - Jin Rusong as heir to Lotus Pier

ao3

Jiang Cheng heard the news in pieces, scraps of wild rumor and gossip repeated a hundred times over, but he still refused to believe it until he actually saw the official announcement.

Jin Guangyao had divorced his wife and sent her back to her father’s house, along with their son.

“Is he insane?” Jiang Cheng asked his second in command, who only shrugged helplessly. “Putting aside the fact that I’m certain that he loves her madly, putting everything else aside, Sect Leader Qin is influential and powerful, and a strong supporter of his father – no matter what happened between them, surely someone as pleasant and compromising as Jin Guangyao could find a way to work it out?”

Jiang Cheng had only met Qin Su a few times, always at Jin Guangyao’s side. He’d heard about how she’d fallen for the dashing young man that turned out to be Jin Guangyao and sworn to marry him, no matter the obstacles; he’d heard how they’d managed to overcome every storm, fight the wind and rain, and eventually made it to their marriage bed.

They’d even had a son together, little Jin Rusong; he was Jin Ling’s best playmate.

And Jin Guangyao was kicking him out? Kicking her out?

Absurd!

Who did he think he was?

And yet, contrary to Jiang Cheng’s expectations, Sect Leader Qin did not immediately explode, or, rather, within a few days, he did, but not in the way anyone had expected. Everyone had joked that he would find Jin Guangyao and strangle him, and he really did physically attack someone – but not Jin Guangyao.

He attacked Jin Guangshan instead.

It was as if he’d gone mad, red-eyed like Nie Mingjue in the throes of his qi deviation; he’d charged at Jin Guangshan, his old friend of thirty years or more, right in the middle of Jinlin Tower, and swiped at him viciously with his sword, cutting a gash in his chest as the surprised Jin sect leader darted back too slowly to wholly dodge.

What could be done? The Lanling Jin sect guards could not stand silently by with such provocation – they counter-attacked at once, and Sect Leader Qin did not survive. A little later, and it was discovered that he had never intended on it: his sword was laced with poison.

Sect Leader Qin died, but he took Jin Guangshan down with him the underworld.

The rumor mill exploded.

Everyone was talking about Sect Leader Qin’s motivations – the suspicious timing of the divorce – Jin Guangyao’s now inevitable ascension to the seat of Sect Leader Jin –

Only Jiang Cheng thought about Qin Su, who should have been ascending right beside him. It had been her father that had died, after all.

Laoling Qin was far enough away from Lanling Jin that they were still mostly independent, and they were close enough to the Qinghe Nie that Jiang Cheng could pretend that he’d only made a short detour on a visit directed towards Nie Huaisang, that notorious purveyor of gossip; luckily enough, Nie Huaisang remembered their old friendship and was more than happy to help cover his tracks.

When Jiang Cheng arrived, the house was already decked out in mourning. Qin Su greeted him, eyes red and swollen from tears.

“I’m sorry,” Jiang Cheng said awkwardly, then flinched when he realized he probably should have said something in greeting first – they really didn’t know each other well enough to skip over all that.

Nevertheless, Qin Su nodded, forgiving him the slip-up before he could even retract it. She was gracious and gentle, kind and quiet, economical and thoughtful – a consummate hostess. The wife of Jin Guangyao could not afford to be anything less.

Former wife.

Jiang Cheng’s gaze danced around the room, searching for something to say, and then abruptly he noticed – “There are two deaths in your household?”

“My mother took her own life,” Qin Su said, her voice dull. She tried to suppress it, but tears gathered in her eyes again. “Shortly before…”

Whatever it was that Jin Guangshan had done that had driven Sect Leader Qin mad, it had involved his wife, Jiang Cheng thought, and then abruptly he turned pale as he put two and two together. He’d never doubted that Jin Guangyao had adored Qin Su, so why would he divorce her?

Unless…

Jin Guangshan had a reputation.

Qin Su laughed a little, a bitter sound. “Everyone will know, soon enough,” she said wisely, seeing that Jiang Cheng had figured it out. “I don’t blame my former husband at all; he acted as he ought to in every respect. It’s only my poor A-Song…I can’t imagine what his life will be like from now on.”

Jiang Cheng looked helplessly at her. To lose not only your parents, one right after the other, but your husband, your reputation, and next even your son…

“Marry me,” he said suddenly, and Qin Su stared at him. “If Sect Leader Jin’s assault were recent rather than ancient, it would have provoked the same result. The only reason anyone might suspect the truth is because of the timing of your divorce – if there’s a reason given for that, people won’t think twice about it.”

His words had come out all in a rush, smashing together like stones tossed around by a waterfall; he hadn’t thought of the idea until right this moment.

“Are you suggesting I admit to adultery?” she asked. Her eyes were as round as the full moon.

Jiang Cheng shrugged, a little helpless. “Your reputation is gone,” he pointed out, wishing he knew how to be kind or tactful. “Adultery or incest – it’s the same either way for you. But for A-Song…”

To be the son of an adulterous woman was disgraceful, but such things happened and people generally looked the other way, as long as the real father was powerful enough.

It was better than being a child of incest.

“But what of your reputation?” she asked. “Sect Leader Jiang, you can’t. I won’t let you injure yourself for my sake.”

“Not for you,” he said, though maybe it was, just a little bit. The loss of your parents, the loss of your whole life, everything you’d ever believed – who could understand that better than him? “For A-Song. He’s Jin Ling’s best friend.”

Qin Su had always been kind to Jin Ling, he thought. She didn’t need to be, could just tolerate him the way most people in Jinlin Tower did, but she really seemed to like him…

It occurred to him suddenly that Qin Su met all of his requirements for a bride: a beauty from a good family, obedient, economical, with a mild personality who wasn’t too loud and wasn’t too talkative, who was good to Jin Ling…

“How’s your cultivation?” he asked abruptly. “Do you know how to cook?”

“Mediocre,” she said, blinking at him. “And I’m better at baking, I think. I like making sweets.”

“Good,” Jiang Cheng said, relieved. “That’s – good. I’m glad. Will you marry me?”

Qin Su bit her lip. “Let me think about it?”

Thoughtful, he added to the list. Cautious, not reckless.

“Take all the time you need,” he said.

She came back to him two shichen later. “What happens to A-Song?” she asked.

“I’ll adopt him as my own,” Jiang Cheng said. “Or he can keep the surname Jin, if you prefer. And if Lianfeng-zun agrees, which I think he will – it’s his birthright, after all.” Too many times over. “Jin Ling lives with me sometimes; they can grow up as cousins, the way they should.”

Qin Su nodded, lips trembling a little. “You won’t regret this?”

“I might,” Jiang Cheng admitted. “But I’m probably not going to marry anyone else, and I’m willing. Are you?”

“I am,” she said, and smiled at him. Her eyes were still red, and the smile shaky, but it was something. “Thank you. I…no, never mind.”

“If we’re going to be married, you’re going to need to learn to ask things of me,” he reminded her.

Qin Su wiped her eyes. “Yes, but there’s asking reasonable things, and then there’s asking to alert my former husband before we announce our engagement.”

“Oh, no, that’s a great idea,” Jiang Cheng said, immediately relieved. “If there’s one thing Lianfeng-zun knows, it’s how to manage an announcement of that sort of magnitude. We should definitely tell him.”

Qin Su’s smile this time was stronger.

Nie Huaisang pulled a few strings and got Jin Guangyao to come over to the Unclean Realm, and when he walked in and saw Qin Su, he flinched. Jiang Cheng could see on his face that he still loved her, and he felt bad for him – not enough to stop, but still.

“I see,” Jin Guangyao said, hearing the plan. His expression was surprisingly neutral – thoughtful, but not as upset as Jiang Cheng would have expected. “It’s not a bad idea. And you don’t even need to admit to adultery, either.”

“We don’t?” Jiang Cheng asked, surprised.

“We can say that my marriage with A-Su broke down after my father’s actions - painting them as recent, rather than ancient,” Jin Guangyao explained. “I didn’t feel I could oppose him, she had no choice but to do so – it was an irrevocable breach. You came to comfort her, having met her during your visits with Jin Ling, and her sect is in need of support…you can say it developed naturally from there. It might not work to quell the rumors, of course, but it would at least provide a way to save face in public…Leave it to me.”

“Thank you, A-Yao,” Qin Su said quietly, and he smiled at her, pained.

“Just be happy,” he said to her, then looked at Jiang Cheng. “Treat her well.”

“I will,” Jiang Cheng promised, and took her by the hand. “I swear.”

-

It was a few years later. Nie Huaisang sat beside Jiang Cheng.

“I think he killed my brother,” he said, playing with his fan. “I’m going to destroy him.”

Jiang Cheng stared at the newest memorial tablet in the Lotus Pier, his hands clenched into fists with knuckles turned white.

“Good,” he said, voice savage. “I’ll help.”

#mdzs #jiang cheng #qin su #jin guangyao #nie huaisang #my fic #my fics #I'm sorry

[americasass91]

The Shield and the Sweater

Hello lovelies! This little fic came to me when the lovely, beautiful, talented @stargazingfangirl18​ asked a very important question on her blog. Would you rather be enemies to lovers with Steve Rogers or friends with benefits with Ransom Drysdale. Well my greedy ass wanted both. Thus the birth of this story. I also turned it around a little to make it fit into Siri’s 5k Soft Dark Challenge! I’ve never written anything dark before. Also not sure if this classifies as soft!dark or if it’s more dark. But it’s one of those! If that makes you uncomfortable, then please don’t read it. This is also my first time writing a threesome, so let me know if it sucks! I hope you enjoy it! 😘

General prompts:

8)The town golden boy isn’t as sweet as everyone thinks.

Dialogue prompts:

3)”Oh, honey, you weren’t supposed to see that.”

11)”I’ve waited a long time for this, sweetheart.”

Rating: Explicit(if you’re under 18, please leave)

Words: 6.2k(this one got away from me, sorry)

Warnings: soft!dark/dark themes, unprotected sex, anal sex, vaginal sex, threesome(M/M/F), manipulation, language, model!Ransom being an asshole, Steve not being who you think he is

“And I really think if everyone pitches in to make these changes, it’ll really make a difference in the long run.”

Wow, so this is how you were going to die. In your whole 20 something years of existence, you never thought boredom would be your cause of death.

Sure, you were the lead Accountant at Stark Tower and these monthly meetings were mandatory. But did you really have to be here to listen to Rogers go on and on about how we can ‘improve our working environment’? Why did he even care anyway? He was barely ever here as it is.

You must have been zoning out worse than you thought because next thing you know your coworker, Janet, is poking you in the side and pointing towards Steve.

With a quick glare sent her way, you move your gaze to the Captain. He is giving you the same look he always does. Like he’s disgusted with you. “I’m sorry Miss Y/L/N. Am I boring you?”

A scoff escapes your mouth. “No, not at all Captain Rogers. I just love when people who are never here seem to always have an opinion on how things are run and how they could be better.”

He narrows his eyes at you. “Do you have a problem with me, Y/N? Cause if you do, I’m sure there’s a way to solve that.”

You stand up and match his expression. You lean forward with your hands resting on the table. You can’t help but notice the Captain drops his gaze to your cleavage that’s now on more display than before. But just as quick as it was there, his gaze rises back up to meet your face. “Is that a threat, Captain Rogers?”

“Oh, it’s more than a-“

Tony quickly stands up and claps his hands together. “Okay! Meeting adjourned! You two, come here!”

You quickly straighten yourself up and make your way over to Tony. You always try to make sure you show him as much respect as you can. He’s your boss after all.

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Stark. My emotions got the better of me. It won’t happen again.”

He nods to you. “Thank you, Y/N. I accept your apology. But what I’m not understanding is why Steve here wanted to fire you?”

You both turn to look at Steve who has a sheepish expression on his face. “Yeah, sorry about that, Tony. She just seems to bring out this ugly side of me. I’ll try to keep it more contained next time.” He then moves his gaze to you. “Sorry, Y/N. I promise to be more professional moving forward.”

He makes a quick exit, leaving you shocked that he apologized at all. Ever since you started here almost a year ago now, you’ve been at each other’s throats. It was your fault really.

It was your first week and you were in the break room grabbing some coffee when you overheard a few of your coworkers making fun of Steve for being a virgin. Now, you weren’t sure if it was true but you wanted to fit in so you made your way over to the group and asked if anyone calls him Captain Virgin. That earned you some big laughs. But the laughter died down quickly as Steve entered the room to grab some coffee. Judging by the glare he gave you, he heard what you had called him.

You went straight to Tony after that to apologize. You really didn’t want to get fired. But you wanted to make sure Tony heard the story from you before Steve got the chance to talk to him. To your utter surprise, Tony found the name hilarious and gave you a high five, saying you were going to fit right in.

Well long story short, it’s almost a year later and Steve is still getting called Captain Virgin. Oh but don’t worry, he has names of his own for you. His favorite is Tony’s Pet. For some reason, it really eats at you when he calls you that.

But the one thing you hate the most about Steve?

Is how utterly, hopelessly, and desperately attracted you are to the son of a bitch.

That happened in your second week when you went to use the complimentary gym and saw him beating the shit out of some poor punching bag. Your panties and your workout were definitely ruined after that.

The more you fought with Steve, the more you just wanted him to bend you over any surface and have his way with you.  

It was despicable how horny you were for him. You were pretty sure all he’d have to do is snap his fingers and point to the floor in front of him and you’d happily drop to your knees and take him down your throat.

So that left you leaving work every day in a horny state. You started by taking care of it yourself when you got home. But after a while even that wasn’t cutting it. Then you started bringing home one night stands. But after the 4th disappointing non-orgasm, you gave up and just learned to live with it.

Sure, you could attempt to start being nice to Steve and maybe ask him out. But you were pretty sure he hated you. Plus you have way too much pride to actually do that.

So that leads to now. It’s Friday night and your workday is almost over. You’re inputting the last few numbers from the last expense report in your pile.

You get the last number put in when Janet approaches you. She sits on the corner of your desk. “So, you coming tonight?”

You take your glasses off and lean back in your chair, stretching your arms over your head. “Coming where?”

She rolls her eyes at you. “Oh, come on Y/N! You know we go out almost every Friday night. You never come and you always say you will!”

You start to clear off your desk and put things back in their place. “Yeah well I could. Or I could go home and sit on my ass and do nothing.”

“Well, that explains why it’s looking a bit bigger lately.”

Janet’s jaw drops as she directs her gaze at Steve, who is now standing in front of your desk.

You smirk and lean on your elbows towards him. “You like looking at my ass, Rogers?”

He scoffs. “Well when it takes up that much space, it’s hard not to notice. But here, I came to give you this.”

He hands you what looks to be a 10 page expense report. “Sorry it’s late, I’ve been busy, you know. Saving the world.”

You ungraciously take it from him and throw it in your to-do pile. “That can wait until Monday. I’ve got plans. We’re going to-” you look towards Janet for clarification. “Lavo.” You turn your gaze back to Steve. “Yeah, we’re going to Lavo. So this will wait til Monday if that’s okay with you, sir.”

Steve does his best to move his bag and jacket subtly towards the front of his pants so you won’t notice his growing hard-on. He hates how turned on he gets when you guys get into it. And then you call him sir? Jesus. He clears his throat. “Of course, I'm the one who turned it in at the last minute.”

Janet speaks up quickly. “You could always come with us! It’ll be fun!”

You grin widely at him. “Yeah! You could finally get your cherry popped, Captain Virgin.”

Steve can’t help the blush that covers his cheeks. “Uh, I can assure you my cherry has been popped since the 40’s. But thank you for your concern. And thank you for the invite, Janet. But i think I’ll stay in tonight.” He takes out his phone and sends a quick text before turning around and walking towards the elevators.

Wow. He didn’t even try to retaliate. You shrug your shoulders and grab your purse before standing up. “Alright, I’ll go! But on one condition!”

Janet claps her hands in excitement and starts walking with you towards the elevators. “Sure, anything!”

You press the button for the lobby. “You are going to be my wingwoman. Cause this girl definitely needs to get laid.”

😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈

Lavo is super packed by the time you guys arrive. Of course you all had to go home and change.

You decided to go with a simple, yet effective, little black dress that showed off just enough to get men’s attention.

Thankfully you are able to score the last table. The waiter comes over and gets everyone’s drink order. You decide to stick with your favorite. You don’t want to get too drunk on the off chance you find someone to take home.

About a half hour into hot office gossip, Lucy, who is sitting across from you, taps your arm. You raise your eyebrows in question towards her.

She subtly nods her head towards the bar. “Okay I’m pretty sure the hottest guy I have ever seen is checking you out.”

You can’t help the smirk that crosses your face. “Yeah? Which one?”

“You can’t miss him. He’s fucking hot. Like no comparison to any of the other dudes sitting up there.”

You glance down at your drink and quickly finish the remainder. You stand up and adjust your dress, pushing up your breasts in the process. “Well, then I guess it’s time for a refill.” You wink and turn to make your way towards the bar.

It doesn’t take long for you to spot him. And boy was Lucy not kidding. He was fucking hot. Brown hair, blue eyes, and a smug smirk that would normally turn you off. But on him it worked. And who even looks that good in a fucking cream colored cable knit?

You go up to the bar, not too close to Mr. Hottie of course, and patiently wait for the bartender.

Hottie McHothot not so subtly moves his gaze up and down your body. He must like what he sees. “Hey honey, have you ever raised chickens?”

Uh. That’s definitely not the first thing you expected to come out of his mouth. You look over at him with confusion on your face. “Uh, no. Why do you ask?”

He just shrugs his shoulders. “Just kinda figured you might. Cause you sure can raise a cock.”

Okay, you’ve definitely never heard that line before. You crack up. You’re pretty sure you even snorted on accident. Once you collect yourself you ask, “Has that line ever worked for you?”

The bartender makes his way over to take your order. After reordering what you had before, you turn towards Hottie and wait for his answer.

“Not sure, my buddy told it to me yesterday so this is the first time I’m using it. Did it work?”

You shrug your shoulders. “I don’t know. It was pretty cheesy.”

“Yeah, maybe. But it got you to laugh. So I’d say mission accomplished. Name’s Ransom. What’s yours, pretty girl?” He holds out his hand for you to shake.

Ransom. Now where have you heard that name before? You accept his hand shake. You can’t help but notice how much bigger his hands are than yours. Jesus. You could already feel your panties getting wet.

“My name’s Y/N. Ransom, that sounds familiar. Do I know you?”

He releases your hand and goes to take a sip of his bourbon. “Well, I guess that depends. Do you read magazines or have you seen the side of the city bus lately?”

You quickly wrack your brain. You don’t read many magazines. But the bus drives by you everyday on your walk to work. Holy shit! That’s it! He’s in his underwear on the side of the bus. You’ve drooled over that picture plenty of times.

“Oh, yeah! I remember now! I’ve seen you on the bus! What’s it an ad for? I can never really get past the almost naked man. A bit distracting on my way to work.”

He smirks as he briefly glances down at your breasts. “I’m glad you know my work. It’s an ad for Calvin Klein. For their new line of men’s briefs. Sorry I’ve been a distraction.” He sends you a wink.

Fuck. He was a model. And a popular one at that if he’s in an ad for Calvin Klein.

“I didn’t say I minded. You can make it up to me you know.” You wink back. Holy shit. Were you really flirting with a model?

“Yeah? Well, how about we get out of here and I’ll show you a fully naked man.”

Okay. Cheesy line number 2. Was that really going to work on you?

Yes.

Yes it was.

“Let me just go grab my purse.”

Drink forgotten, you go back to your table as quickly as you can without looking desperate. “Sorry, girls. But this is where I leave you.”

Janet glances down at her phone. “We haven’t even been here an hour yet! Where are you going?”

You send her a wink. “I’m leaving with that guy! You guys know him! Remember that ad on the side of the bus?”

They all turn their gaze to him. And they all make it very obvious. He just waves and sends them a smirk.

“Holy fucking shit! That’s the new Calvin Klein guy! Oh my god you lucky bitch!”

“Wait! Listen. We’ll let you go on one condition.”

You furrow your brows in confusion. “Okay?”

Janet gives you a naughty smirk. “On Monday I’ll need a report on if they had to stuff his briefs to get that delicious looking bulge or not.”

You give her a naughty smirk of your own. “I can totally do that.”

😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈

Monday morning you were all smiles as you stepped off the elevator and headed towards your desk. You give Janet a wink as you pass by her. She quickly makes her way over just as you sit down. “Um, excuse me hoe. But is that the same dress you were wearing Friday night?”

You quickly grab the cardigan you always keep in your desk out and put it on and button it up, attempting to look a little more professional. “Maybe.”

Janet opens her mouth in shock. “You stayed the whole weekend with him? You little slut! How was it?”

You turn on your computer and grab for the expense report of Steve’s you left in your to-do pile. Then you turn towards your nosy coworker. “Well, if you must know, yes. I did stay the whole weekend with him. And I’m pretty sure I was in an orgasm-induced coma the whole time. It’s all kind of a rough, sticky, mind-blowing blur.”

“Are you going to see him again?”

You shrug your shoulders as you put in your login information on the computer. “I haven’t decided yet. While the sex was the best I’ve ever had, he’s kind of an ass. Talked about himself and all the famous people he’s hooked up with since becoming a model. I honestly kept initiating sex just to make him shut up.”

She gives you a look like you’re stupid. “I’m not seeing the issue here. So what if he talks about himself a lot? The sex was amazing. You need to lock that down girl.”

You roll your eyes at her. “That’s the thing, Janet. He doesn’t do relationships. He told me so multiple times. Plus I’m pretty sure he was texting another chick in between our ‘sessions’. I suppose if I’m desperate, I’ll get a hold of him.”

“You know you could always just have him on backup for sex. Like a friends with benefits situation.”

“Janet, I’m in my late 20s. I’m too old for that kind of relationship.”

“Exactly, you’re in your late 20s! This is the perfect time for that kind of relationship before you settle down and get married! Have one last final hoorah!”

“I can’t have this conversation before caffeine. I’m going to get coffee. You act like I’m dying soon or something.” You turn to walk away but then remember you were supposed to tell her something. “Oh yeah and by the way. The bulge is definitely not stuffed.”

You give her a wink and then head to the break room for some much needed coffee. When you see who’s in there, you almost contemplate going downstairs to a different break room.

Steve is standing at the counter, preparing his coffee. He turns when he hears you come in and gives you a once over. “Well, look what the cat dragged in.”

You grab a mug out of the cabinet beside him. “Sorry my appearance isn’t up to your standards today, Rogers. I was a little...busy this weekend.”

He takes a sip of his coffee to make sure it’s right. Then he moves out of your way so you can get to the coffee, but still staying close. “Busy getting run over by a truck? Cause that’s kind of what you look like.”

You pour yourself a generous amount of coffee and take a long sip, letting the bitter liquid slowly make you human. “Yeah, well. I was busy getting fucked all weekend, Rogers. But I know your little innocent mind wouldn’t know what that’s like.”

That wipes the stupid little smirk right off his face. He almost looks pissed. He moves even closer to you. Almost pressing himself right up against you. So close that you can smell his coffee-scented breath. If you were wearing panties, they’d be ruined.

“Not all of us feel the need to sleep around. Some of us are looking for a real connection. Not just a one night stand of meaningless, mediocre sex.”

You press yourself just a little closer to him, his chest now touching yours. “Oh, it was anything but mediocre. Maybe if you actually got some, you’d know what that feels like.”

He leans his head down until his mouth is next to your ear, his left hand now resting on your hip. “You really need to stop insinuating that I’m a virgin sweetheart. If you were nicer to me, I’d show you that I know how to fuck.” With that he backs up and heads out of the break room.

You let out the breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding. Jesus Christ. You swear you almost came.

And if you were nicer to him? Fuck him. He’s not nice to you either. That’s okay. You have someone who can scratch this itch.

You pull out your phone and send a quick text.

To: Fuckboi

You busy tonight? I could really use a release.

The reply came almost immediately.

From: Fuckboi

Didn’t get enough of my cock this weekend huh? I suppose I could make myself available.

You roll your eyes and quickly reply with your address and what time to be over.

The rest of the day passes by slowly. It takes you half the day to enter Steve’s expense report. God he’s descriptive. At least it’s completed. You can’t really say that much for the other Avengers. They usually half assed them and made them barely acceptable.

You are shutting down for the day when Steve approaches your desk. You remove your glasses and look at him expectantly. “Is there something I can help you with, Steve?”

A blush creeps it’s way across his cheeks. “Um, I was actually just wondering if you had time to go over the new expense report forms? They should be a lot easier to fill out.”

You glance down at the clock on your computer. Ransom is going to be at your place in about 20 minutes.“Can we do it tomorrow? I have company that’ll be showing up at my apartment in like 20 minutes.”

His hopeful smile falls. His face is now unreadable. “Would your company happen to be whoever you spent the weekend with?”

Confused, you grab for your purse after getting your computer shut down. “Actually, yes. Should I have asked your permission first?” You attempt a joke to ease the sudden tension.

He pulls out his phone and starts typing furiously. Wow. You weren’t aware he knew how to text. You hear it ping with a reply before he angrily puts it back in his pocket. “Sure, we can do this tomorrow. Wouldn’t want to get in the way of your whoreing around.”

Your jaw drops in surprise. Sure you guys were always throwing jabs at each other. But he’d never said anything like this before. And in such a mean tone.

You round your desk and stand right in front of him. “Fuck you, Steve.”

You hurry towards the elevators before he can see the tears that have welled up. You couldn’t let him know he had that power over you. Asshole. Thank god Ransom was coming over. Hopefully he could fuck what Steve just said right out of your head.

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You’ve lost count of how many orgasms Ransom has pulled from you with his mouth when there’s a knock on your door.

Ransom looks up at you from his kneeling position on your living room floor. “Did you invite someone else to join us, pretty girl?”

You scoff and push him away so you can stand up. You pull your dress down as you make your way towards the door. “Yeah. I can barely handle just you. I’m pretty sure if we added someone else, I’d actually die.”

You open the door and gasp in surprise. “Steve? What are you doing here?”

He rubs the back of his neck nervously. “Look, I know you probably already have company but I felt really bad about what I said to you earlier today and wanted to apologize.”

You have so many questions. “How did you know where I lived?”

That sheepish smile makes its appearance again. “I may or may not have looked in your employee file.”

You shake your head. “And you felt the need to come all the way here and apologize? Why not just text me?”

“It would only have felt right to me to do it in person. I really am sor-”

You feel a pair of arms wrap around you from behind. “Well, who do we have here? Why is Captain America at your door?”

You turn your head to address Ransom. “He just came by to apologize to me. I think he was just leaving.”

Steve has a disappointed look on his face. “Yeah, I suppose I was.”

“Awe, what a shame. I thought you were gonna ask him to join us, pretty girl.”

Steve’s eyes grow wide at the thought. You quickly speak up. “No, I don’t think he’d be comfortable with that. He’s a little old fashioned.” You give him a sincere smile. You didn't think that was a bad thing.

Steve looks back towards the elevators and then back to you. He clears his throat. “What if I wanted to join you?” Seeing your wide eyed look, he quickly adds, “Only if Y/N would be comfortable with that of course.”

You contemplate what the consequences could be in your head. But then you get distracted when Ransom starts grinding his hard on against your ass. “Come on, pretty girl. Make a decision.”

The next word comes out of your mouth faster than what your brain can process. “Okay.”

😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈

Now you were standing awkwardly in your bedroom with Steve and Ransom looking at you expectantly.

You’ve never done this before so you’re not sure how this is supposed to go. “So, um. How do we start exactly?”

Ransom smirks and comes up behind you. “I think you should call the shots, pretty girl. If you’re okay with that, Steve?”

With the mention of his name, he walks towards you and places his hands on your hips. “I think that’s a great idea. Can I kiss you now?” He places his hand under your chin and raises your face up to meet his. “I’ve waited a long time for this, sweetheart.” With that, his lips meet yours. It’s explosive. You quickly wrap your hands around his neck and press yourself up against him.

You get so lost in the kiss, you forget that Ransom is there. That is until he presses his lips against your neck and presses himself against your ass. It presses you even further against Steve, making you feel his excitement against your lower belly.

You’re so overwhelmed already and you’d barely started. You may not survive this evening.

As you move your hands down to remove Steve’s shirt, Ransom is unzipping your dress, pressing kisses to every inch of exposed skin.

Without breaking the kiss, Steve moves his hands around to unhook your bra so he can get his hands on your breasts. He pinches your nipples, causing you to moan into his mouth. He moves his lips to your neck, sucking on your pulse point.

After successfully removing your dress, Ransom stands back up and turns your head to connect your lips. He starts rutting his clothed hard on against your naked ass. His left hand reaches around to bat one of Steve’s away so he can squeeze your breast.

Steve takes the hand that had been swatted away and moves it down to your soaking wet core. He starts lightly circling your clit. Just enough pressure to make you mewl.

You reach behind you with your left hand and tug at the waistband of Ransom’s briefs. “Off.” You moan out as you take your right hand and start attempting to take off Steve’s jeans. He smirks into your neck and helps you out. He barely gets them unbuttoned and unzipped before you’re reaching your hand into them and his boxers to grab his cock. It feels big.

Ransom grabs your left hand and places it on his now free cock. You wrap your hand around it and give it a squeeze before you start pumping your hand up and down. You do the same to Steve’s, making the both of them let out grunts against both sides of your neck. Steve increases the pressure on your clit a little. Still not enough.

“Nee-need, you. Please.” You weakly moan out. Ransom moves his mouth up to your ear. “How do you want us, pretty girl?”

You reluctantly pull away from both of them so you can think. You decide to be greedy. You point to Steve. “I want you to lay on the bed, please.”

He does as you ask. Putting his hands behind his head as he awaits further instructions.

You get on the bed and straddle him. You turn around and reach your arm out for Ransom. “Want you behind me.” You lean over and open your bedside drawer to grab the lube and toss it at Ransom. He smirks as he straddles Steve’s legs and gets behind you. He uncaps the lube and starts coating his cock with a generous amount. “Need my cock in that ass, pretty girl?”

You hold up your hand. “Wait.” You lean down towards Steve and give him a quick kiss. “Are you okay with this?”

He nods his head. “As long as you are.” You raise back up and smile at him. You turn your head and look at Ransom. “I’m assuming you're okay with this?”

He just smirks and squeezes some lube out so that it slides down the crack of your ass. “More than okay, pretty girl. Need me to stretch you out first?”

You smirk and pull him in for a quick, filthy kiss. “I think it got plenty stretched out this weekend.”

He matches your smirk. “You little slut. Wanting both of our cocks stuffing you full.”

You whimper as he lands a smack on your ass. Leaning up on your knees, you grab a hold of Steve’s cock and start running his tip up and down your folds. He places his left hand on your right hip and his right hand on your left thigh. “Condom?”

You quickly shake your head and pause your actions. “On the pill. Unless of course you’d be more comfortable with one.”

He shakes his head. “No, just making sure.”

You turn back to Ransom. “I’ll let you know when I’m ready for you.”

He nods and places his hands on your shoulders, waiting somewhat patiently.

You slowly sink down on Steve’s cock. He’s stretching you out so deliciously. It burns in just the right way. Ransom may be longer, but Steve is definitely thicker.

After you get fully seated on him, you take a minute to adjust. It only takes a few seconds. You turn your head towards Ransom. “Okay, I’m ready.”

He removes his right hand from your shoulder and grabs the base of his cock and starts pressing against the tight ring of muscle. He’d been in there a lot over the weekend. But it was still a tight fit regardless. He doesn’t go as slow and sheaths himself to the hilt, causing you to moan out in slight pain and pleasure.

Holy fuck. You feel so full. You think you might die. That is until Ransom removes his cock until just the tip remains and then forcefully thrust back in, causing you to grind on Steve’s dick.

Steve grunts out from the movement and starts thrusting up into you the best he can from his position. Ransom wraps his left arm around you and continues his thrusts, not letting up his pace. You don’t even really have to move, the both of them doing it for you. They somehow find the perfect rhythm. Each of them pulling out and pushing in at the same time. One of your hands is behind you, resting on the back of Ransom’s head while the other is resting on Steve’s chest.

Steve sits up suddenly and pulls you in for a kiss. “Like being stuffed with both of our cocks, pretty girl?” You hear from behind you. “Yes. So good. So full. Gonna cum.”

Ransom removes his arm from around you and reaches down and starts circling your clit. “Do it. Cum all over us. Make a mess.”

Steve can feel you squeezing him. “Please, sweetheart. Need to feel you cum on my cock. You’re gripping me so good.”

You explode. You clamp your eyes shut, seeing stars behind your eyelids. You let the both of them fuck you through it.

Ransom’s hips stutter. The fluttering around his cock is too good. He cums with a shout of your name, filling up your ass to the brim. He gives you a few more thrusts before he pulls out and collapses beside you two.

Steve’s been patient while you come down from your high. He lays back down, pulling you with him so that your chest to chest. He bends his knees and grabs onto your hips. “You ready, sweetheart?” You raise up, both of your hands on each side of his head. You give him a nod.

That’s all he needs. He starts fucking you, hard and fast, chasing his release. He can feel it building. He just needs to feel you come undone around him again. He moves one of his hands and starts circling your clit with his thumb. “Need you to cum for me again, Y/N.”

You shake your head. “Can’t. Too much.”

Ransom sits up beside you. “I know what she needs.” He reaches over with his left hand and wraps it around your throat, squeezing gently.

It makes you clench down on Steve’s cock. “Yeah? That all you needed, sweetheart? A hand wrapped around your pretty throat? I know you like it. Can feel you squeezing me.” He picks up his pace. The only sounds that can be heard are his grunts, your breathy monas, and skin slapping against skin.

It doesn’t take long for your orgasm to hit you. This one is somehow even more intense than the last.

You must’ve blacked out for a few seconds because the next thing you know, you’re waking up in between Steve and Ransom.

Steve smiles down at you. “There she is. We lost you for a second, sweetheart.”

You feel drunk. You smile goofily up at him. “Did you cum?”

Just as you ask that, you can feel his release seeping out of your overused cunt. Then you feel cum leaking out of your ass. You hide your face behind your hands in embarrassment. “I can’t believe we just did that.”

Ransom removes one hand while Steve removes the other. “Nuh uh uh. No hiding allowed, pretty girl. I have no regrets.” He looks at Steve. “Do you?”

Steve smiles down at you and leans down to press a soft kiss against your lips. “None from me. You tired, sweetheart?”

You let out a big yawn and nod your head, slowly closing your eyes. “Get some rest, pretty girl.” That’s the last thing you hear before sleep takes you.

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You wake up sometime in the early morning, stretching out your sore limbs. You know you have a dumb smile on your face. But you can’t help but notice your empty bed.

You sit up and hiss at the deliciously sore feeling between your legs. You grab your robe and slip it on. You can smell coffee coming from the kitchen. You giddily make your way out of the room and down the hallway. They both barely just come into view, still unaware you’re there, when you hear Steve speak.

“I thought you were going to be an asshole to her? Make her see I’m not that bad.”

You hear Ransom next. “I was an asshole to her. I’m sorry I dicked her down so good that she wanted more.”

Steve scoffs. “I never gave you the okay to fuck her!”

“You also didn’t tell me it was off limits. Look you got what you wanted right?”

“No, actually I didn’t. I didn’t pay you so we could have a threesome together.”

What the fuck? Steve paid Ransom to help him get in your pants?

“Ok, how about this? I’ll give you all of your money back if I can fuck her one more time before I go? Then we’ll be squared away.”

Steve seems to be conflicted. “Fine! But this is the last time Ransom. I have to get to work anyway. After this, she’s mine. And make sure she’s not late for work herself.”

Before you have time to react, Steve rounds the corner and sees you standing there. He has a deer caught in headlights look. Ransom comes up beside him and sees you. “Oh, honey, you weren’t supposed to see that.”

You slowly start backing up towards your bedroom. Steve moves towards you, stopping once you put your hands up. “Stay away from me! Both of you! I want nothing to do with either of you!”

Ransom moves past Steve and grabs onto your arms. “Oh, please. You’d fuck us again if we wanted. Wouldn’t you?”

You spit in his face. “Fuck you, Hugh.”

He gets a sinister look on his face. “Wrong move, pretty girl.” He looks toward Steve. “Don’t worry, I’ll fuck the brat out of her. You better tell her boss she won’t be in today.”

Your eyes go wide at his words. You start thrashing against him, trying your best to get away. Steve has had enough. He comes over and yanks you away from him and presses you against the wall. “You better calm down, sweetheart. I’ll treat you like a princess if you can be my good girl. Can you do that?”

You shake your head. “Why would you think I’d want anything to do with you after finding out you paid someone to help get into my pants?”

He gives you an evil smirk. “Because if you don’t, I’ll just have to release the tape of last night on the internet. Let everyone see how much of a slut you actually are.”

You narrow your eyes at him. “You’re bluffing.”

He smirks and turns his head towards Ransom. “Show her.”

Ransom gets his phone out of his pocket and swipes at the screen for a second before turning it in your direction.

Holy shit. They weren’t bluffing. There you were, getting fucked by the both of them. That would ruin you if it got out. Not only would you get fired, but your parents would probably disown you. You’d never have a normal relationship again. You’re fucked. Even more than you were last night. How had you not noticed they were recording it?

Ransom must have read your mind. “I set my phone up while you were busy with Steve’s fingers on your cunt and his tongue down your throat. I think you need to ask her again Steve.”

Steve grabs your chin and moves your gaze onto his face. “I’ll ask you again. Are you going to be my good girl? Let Ransom fuck you one more time and then it’ll just be me and you?”

You drop your gaze to the floor. You feel a tear run down your cheek as you whisper out, “I’ll be your good girl.”

Taglist: @stargazingfangirl18​ @drabblewithfrannybarnes​ @harrysthiccthighss​ @lllols @patzammit​ @quxxnxfhxll​

Steve Taglist: @donutloverxo​

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[buckystevelove]

My Brightest Star

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word count: 2708

Warning: ANGST and fluff

A/N: This is my longest work. Please leave comments. Ask, submissions and requests are open.

A week, that’s how long has passed since Bucky’s world felt apart. He should have known, his whole life has been full of tragedy, one after the other. He had 7 years of happiness and peace, he will have to come to terms with the fact that maybe those years would be the only ones in his long and sad life that he would known what real and complete happiness really is.

He met you 7 years ago in a coffee shop, you accidentally tripped and spilled all your coffee in him. You apologized over and over again, Bucky couldn’t care less about the hot drink splatted all over his body, he was so enthralled over the beautiful woman standing in front of him, for years he thought that he would never get love, but you managed to prove him wrong. He claims that it was love at first sight, he simply knew that you were his soul mate.  

After the incident, you bought his coffee as a symbol of forgiveness, though he really didn’t care. You exchanged names and phone numbers. Just a few hours later you received a massage from Bucky, inviting you to go for dinner the next day. Soon, one date turn to seeing each other every time you could. You felt for him, and hard. Eventually you met all of his friends, you became a great friend with Wanda and Nat. They would invite you to all the girl nights they had. You got along with Sam, always joking around and making pranks, same with Tony. You also became best friend with Steve, you had a strong relationship with him besides yours with Bucky. You too were like siblings, he always claimed that you were his little sister, and warned Bucky never harm you, or he would have to face the consequences.

Nobody was surprise nor bother when you moved to the compound with Bucky. Everyone was super exited to have you closer, that made Bucky a bit jealous.

You and Bucky were attached to the hip. One year into your relationship, he knew that he was going to marry you, you were going to be the mother of his children. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. You were the one, so he asked you to marry him.

It was so beautiful, he took you on a trip to the museum, your favorite place to spend the time. When you were in the sculptures room the kneeled and said; “YN, since the moment I saw you I knew that you were the one, I knew that I was going to marry you, and all you have done is prove me right. You are the love of my life, my partner, my best friend I can no longer imagine a future in which you are not in it, because YOU are my FUTURE. You have been the light at the end of the tunnel, you have brought me happiness, love I thought I no longer deserved after all the awful things I had done, you helped name realized who the real James Buchanan Barnes is, and who I want him to be. I want to be your husband because I love you so much. You are my entire world YN. So, would you marry me?”

At the end of his speech both of you had tears in your checks, you throw yourself over him and said yes over and over again, you were beaming.

6 months after that, many hours of planning and cake tasting, you and Bucky had the most beautiful fall wedding. It was perfect. Your family and the team was there, everyone was so happy for the two of you.

When the time to say the vowels came you couldn’t be more thrilled, you have been writing them for so long.

“James Buchanan Barnes, you are the love of my life. You have been the one who has taught me what love really is, what it is like to love someone with every single atom in my body. You have taught me what is like to be completely and uoughterly happy, that is how I feel when ever I am with you. James, when we met you told me that you only saw yourself as a monster, as the vilan of many people’s lives, but baby, you are my knight in shining armor, you are absolutely everything to me. You are the brightest star in my universe, the one and only. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I want to tell you and show you how much I love you every day, I want you to feel how much I love you even after we are death. I want to keep loving you and choosing you a hundred of lives after this. Because Bucky, MY LOVE FOR YOU WILL NEVER END.”

At the end both of you were crying, among many other of your guests.

Your honeymoon was perfect. Tony paid the two of you a 3 weeks trip around Europe. Nine months later, you had your gorgeous daughter, Rebecca. She looked exactly like you, but her eyes, she had the most beautiful blue eyes just like her father. The three of you were the definition of a perfect family, you and Bucky did ocationaly fight like all healthy couples do, but your life was great. Your house was so full of love and happiness.

Bucky was so thankful to you, you had given him all he could ever dreamed for in life and more.

The three of you spent all the time you could together, you went to the park and had movie nights, went of family trips and spent lazy Sunday mornings in bed together. You wanted Becca to feel and understand what a loving home was, since you didn’t had one. You wanted her to feel the love you and Bucky had for her.

“Becca, Bucky, you two know you are the most important people in my life right. I love the two of you so so much. You are the ones that make me happy. You are my greatest treasures.” You said to your husband and 5 year old daughter one afternoon, while cuddling in the couch together.

“I love you too mommy, you too daddy. You are the best parents in the world, thank you.” She said kissing yours and Bucky’s face, making you giggle.

“You dolls are my everything. I love you.” He said before attacking the two of you with tickles, and whispering to your ear. “Thanks doll, for all this.”

The day had started like any other Tuesday would, you woke up after your alarm. Waking up Bucky with kisses and loving touches, after he woke up he heads to shower while you got Becca ready. Once the two of them were dressed, Bucky went to the kitchen to make breakfast wihle you got ready. The three of you ate together, you heard how Becca´s best friend was going to have a party next Saturday and you needed to buy her a present. You decided to go to the mall with her after classes and maybe have a girl’s day and do you nails. That made her smile so bright, which was what you loved the most about your life, that it was full of happiness.

After eating, you said goodbye to Bucky and Rebecca, he was going to take her to school and then go to the Avengers compound to train some new recruits, while you went to your office.

Bucky’s day went normal, as any other day would go, he did some training and hanged out with Sam and Steve. When 4pm came around the received a call from Becca´s school, her teacher told him that she was still there. You never came pick her up, he didn´t know why you were late. You always told him if your meeting was going to be longer so someone would pick your daughter from school.

“Sorry man.” He told Steve at the middle of the meeting. “Apparently YN never went to pick Rebecca from school she is there by herself, I really need to go. I also need to see what happened to YN. She is not picking up her phone.” Bucky said standing up from his chair.

“Sure pal, everything good with her?” Steve said a bit worry, he didn´t want his best friend to be in panic.

“I hope so.” He said walking to the door, but before he could reach it his phone rang again.

Steve just stood there, and watched how the color of his best friends face went completely white, then Bucky’s knees failed and he felt to the floor. Tears running down his cheeks, his face was shaking. He was wordless. Sentences couldn´t form in his mouth. Steve was next to him in second, he took the phone from his hand.

That when he heard him scream, he screamed as if he was dying, painful and horrible screams.

“Excuse me.” Steve said through the phone. “This is Steve Rogers. What happened?” He asked, though he already had an idea of what had happened.

“I am so sorry Sir, but I regret to inform you that Mrs. Barnes had a car accident today. She arrived to the New York Presbyterian Hospital at 2:36pm, she immediately went to surgery. She didn´t make it, she was called at 3:49pm. I am so sorry, but we need her husband to come.”

Steve hanged up the phone, he had tears in his eyes, he was about to cry. He had lost his best friend, but he needed to be strong for the man that was like a brother to him, to his nice.

Bucky was in the floor, sobbing and screaming. He went and called for Nat. She enter and saw the state in which Bucky was, then she saw the tears in Steve´s eyes.

“What happened?” She asked in panic.

“I… he…N-Nat” he mumbled between sobs. “Can you please look for Rebecca at school? Please.”

Nat realized, she immediately shook her head in disbelieve, “no, no, no,”

“Nat, please. Someone needs to be with her.” Steve managed to say. She wiped her tears and left the room.

Steve was in the floor hugging his best friend while he cried his eyes out, he was no longer screaming.

“I am sorry buddy, I am so sorry.” He said to his friend. “I know how you feel, just let it all out. But later you need to be strong for your daughter. She just lost her mother, she will need her dad. She needs you to be there for her, but now. I am here for you.”

“Not her, please not her. She is perfect Steve, I can’t, I love her, we can’t lose her.” He sobbed and screamed. “We were supposed to spend the rest of our lives together, the two of us.”

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When he calmed down, they went to the hospital. A drunk driver had crashed against your car in a traffic light. He died immediately.

Becca slept in Nat´s room. Bucky slept in his old room in the compound, he couldn’t go to your home. Too many memories. He couldn’t face his daughter, he would broke in front of her, he needed to be strong. He cried himself to sleep that day.

He next day was awful, he needed to explain to her 5 year old baby, that her mother would never hug her again. He couldn’t even began to comprehend that.

“Becca, baby. I need to talk to you.” He said the next morning the compounds living room, all  the other Avengers were in the hospital helping Bucky prepare every detail for the funeral, Steve was the only one there, next to Bucky and Becca. In case either of them needed him.

“Daddy, why did we slept here?” She asked frowning her eyebrows, just like her dad. “Where is mommy? We were supposed to have a girl´s day yesterday.”

That made Bucky tear a few tears which he rapidly cleaned.

“Babydoll, its because…” Bucky mad a pause and looked through the windows. “Mommy had an accident, and she will never come again.”

Becca made a confused face.

“Why? Can´t you just put her a bad-aid like you do to me when I have accident?” She asked in all her innocence, which made Bucky’s strength fall. He quickly enveloped her in his arms.

“That is the thing baby, she had a big accident, she is gone.” He started to sob again, so did Steve.

Becca began to stroke her father’s hair. “We will see her daddy, someday, but I am really going to miss her.” She started to cry and hug her dad.

“I want my mommy, dad.”

“So do I honey.”

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The funeral was beautiful, full with YN´s family and friends. They all told beautiful stories and tried to remember the amazing person YN was. Bucky couldn’t talk, he had so many things to say, none of them were for this people to hear, they were for his love.

A week had passed since you awful dead, Bucky stayed at the compound, he couldn’t go home, he also needed help with Becca. He could barely managed to take care of himself.

He was in his bed, looking at the celling, numb. He know the needed to stand up and shower, he needed to get up and care of his baby, but she was the carbon copy of you. It was like looking at you, it hurt, it really hurt. Lying there he heard some knocking at his door. Then Steve came..

“Hey pal, the lawyer came today, he left the will and this letter. She wrote it you when you guys had Rebecca.”

“Thanks, just leave it there.” He said gesturing to his night stand.

When Steve left he got up and grabbed the letter, it had his name in your beautiful calligraphy.

Bucky,

My love, I hope that you never have to open this letter, but if you do, I want you to know that you made me the happiest woman alive. In all the galaxies we know that exist, in all the universe that may. I was the happiest, all thanks to you. You teached me what the meaning for being alive really meant, you showed me so many incredible and beautiful things, and you gave me our most amazing gift, our daughter Rebecca, she is the tangible evidence of our love.

If the time in which you have to open this letter comes, know that you did everything you could. Under any circumstances think that this was your fault, it wasn´t.

I love you so much Bucky, you have really no idea, and I know you loved me just as much, that is why I am asking you one last favor.

Please don´t close yourself, don´t let yourself return to the man you were before be met, not that he was any less amazing, but he was lonely. I want you to continue living your life to the fullest. I know I can´t ask you to not miss me or forget me, I don’t want that. I want you to remember my memory and cherish it. I want you to show all then wonders of the world to sweet Becca. Please never let her forget that she was the most important person in my life besides you.

I want the two of you to continue to love, and let yourselves be love. I love you with all my heart, and every single atom in my body.

          Don’t forget me my brightest star, YN.

After reading that Bucky cleaned his cheeks.

“I will always love you.” He kissed the letter and placed it in his nightstand. He got up and went to find his daughter.

“I love you baby, and so did you mother. You are our greatest creations.” He no longer had you here, so he was going to spend all his breathing moments showing her how much he loved her, he was the only part left in this world of YN, and she was that greatest gift she could have left him.

He would continue to love you long after you are gone. For ever, til the end of times.

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A/N: I cried so hard writing this. I am so sorry, but I hope you like it. I really appreciate feedback.

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