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#watching the other team celebrate... we want this bad too
malereader-inserts · a day ago
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Pampered Prince and His Knight
Fandom: Haikyuu Pairing: Kozume Kenma x Male!Reader Summary: Kenma is known to be a pampered prince, but every prince/princess has a knight. Word Count: 1,062
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“Aren’t you somewhat excited?” Kuroo asked, standing in the box waiting for Fukurodani to enter.
“Why should I?” Kenma mumbles as Yaku snort behind the pampered prince, Kenma shrinks as small as he can, he knows what his best friend is asking about and he cannot allow anyone to see the flustered cheeks he wore.
“(L/n) is about to come through those doors, aren’t you a little bit excited to go against him?” Kuroo asked, giving his best friend a side eye, “Don’t tell me shrimpy got you more motivated to play rather than your boyfriend!”
“Kenma-san has a boyfriend?” Lev exclaimed as Kenma rolls his eyes, causing Yaku and Kuroo to stifle their laughter, “Kenma-san isn’t the most approachable.”
“Yaku-san,” Kenma turns to the third year, who perked up at his name, “Please kick Lev.”
“Wait no!” Lev shouted, rather too late because Yaku was happy enough to fulfil Kenma’s request.
“You know Kenma, if you don’t start showing him off, he’s going to go away from you,” Kuroo advises, Kenma glares at the older because of unasked advice, “I’m just saying, if you don’t talk about him, show him off and rarely show affection towards him - he’ll get tired. Especially, you favour Hinata over him.”
“I know my boyfriend, Kuro.”
Kenma wanted this conversation to end, almost as if some all-powerful being heard him, the team they were against enters the gym. Bokuto coming at the front, with the team and school cheering his entrance. Kenma sees you in the back with a smile on your face, sporting the opposite uniform to the rest of the team. 
The team start to warm up, and as the match starts, Kenma looks over to the other side, seeing you on the line with a smile on your face. Kenma tries to hide the flush in his cheeks as he looks down on the floor, as the whistle blew. 
The match was obviously in the favour of your school, you had Bokuto as an ace and when he was in his element, he was unstoppable. But, you know Kenma, you know that he was the brain of Nekoma, he will do anything in his power to demotivate your ace and captain.
“Wait, how do I even hit a cross shot?” Bokuto says, confused and upset as your team look at him in shock, “My line shots are really on-point today, so I just kept hitting those and now I can’t get out of the habit...”
You looked at Akaashi, “You know how to deal with your boyfriend, Keiji.”
“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi gathers Bokuto’s attention, “Then hit a cross shot without thinking about it, I’ll open a path for you.”
Bokuto seemed to be really motivated with Akaashi’s words before getting depressed again, “And what if I can’t? What if I get blocked for you.”
“Then, trust in me, Bokuto-san,” You pat him on the shoulder, “I’ll be there to defend when you’re in the front lines.”
“Dude! You sound so cool!”
It was to be expected that you’d win. Kenma watched how you celebrated with your team, he had been trying to get your attention whilst focusing on trying to win the game. Kuroo’s words have been playing on his mind every so often, he had started to think that he was a bad boyfriend.
“Kenma!” 
“(Y/n)!” Kenma exclaimed back, before clearing his throat and glared at his best friend, who snorted in amusement.
“Alright, we have another game in an hour, let’s wait for Kenma somewhere else,” Kuroo ordered, giving Kenma a look before ushering Lev and Tora away. Yaku giving Kenma a thumbs up.
Kenma would like to say he despises his senpais, but they were caring about him and overall Kenma wished they didn’t have to leave in the forthcoming months, and at least Kenma didn’t have to meet new people.
“Hey, congrats on getting to nationals,” Kenma says when you reached him, and he knows that his team has steered clear.
“Thanks, I know your team will beat Nohebi!” You furrowed your eyebrow for a second, tilting your head, “There’s something up, I noticed that you were a bit distracted during our game.”
“Am I a bad boyfriend?”
“What?”
You both stared at each other in silence, just the two of you in the hallway as Kenma looks for the proper words to say to you, though he was never fond of showing emotions and he often wonders how he has landed you as a boyfriend, he always thinks that he got lucky.
“Well, Kuroo said-”
“Kuroo said?” You raised an eyebrow, crossing your arms over your chest, as Kenma stops to stare at you, “Kuroo is book smart, he often forgets that he’s not as intelligently advance within the “streets”, as you may say.”
Kenma smiles to himself, you know how to ease his racing thoughts with one simple statement. Kenma stops fidgeting, his hands are now out of his pockets and he can look into your eyes, without any fear.
“I don’t talk about you often, or show you off to the world and I’m not the most affectionate towards you, so I’m just wondering if I’m a bad boyfriend? Kuroo thinks I show more affection to Shoyou than you and it got me thinking...”
“Kenma, baby, you’re not a bad boyfriend,” You spoke softly, eyes going gentle and there was a reassuring shimmer in your eyes, “I know how you are. Sure, I wished you talked about me often or showed me off as I do with you - but, I’m not going to pressure you about it. You take your time with it and we’re working on your affection, step by step, right? We’re doing your pace, whatever makes you comfortable and that’s not being a bad boyfriend, okay?”
Kenma’s shoulders relax, easing as his mind stops racing, “Okay.”
“I love you, Kozume Kenma, I wouldn’t change you for the world. After all, you’re my pampered prince.”
“And you’re my knight in shining armour,” Kenma smiles at you as you kissed his temple, “I love you too (L/n) (Y/n).”
“Go win your next match, I’ll be supporting you from the crowd!”
Kenma smiles and nodded, he wanted to go to national to see you play again, and obviously play against Hinata. You kiss his hands as good luck.
“I’ll win it for you.”
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kjmsupremacist · 6 days ago
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teaser!!!
The Defeat of Creation (Taeyong/Reader)
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Taeyong is a musician AI robot, built to entertain, built to feel nothing, built to never die. Reader is his stylist, and over time he finds himself attached to them. He can’t tell anybody, though—robots whose emotional centers malfunction are immediately retired. (for emmy’s AI Project collab—click the link to read more about each model!)
“The old man said, ‘You will be required to do wrong no matter where you go. It is the basic condition of life, to be required to violate your own identity. At some time, every creature which lives must do so. It is the ultimate shadow, the defeat of creation; this is the curse at work, the curse that feeds on all life. Everywhere in the universe.” ― Philip K. Dick, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?
Characters: Taeyong, Reader, the rest of nct intermittently
Genre: Androids & Robots, Sci-Fi, Romance, Cyberpunk (as in the genre, not the video game. I mean like... old cyberpunk)
Pairing: Taeyong/gn!Reader (Taeyong third-person POV)
Warnings: [teaser] death mentions, dark themes; [overall] violence, blood, d/s elements in the smut probably
Rating: Explicit, but the teaser is Teen & Up
Projected length in total: 25k or so, give or take 10k haha
Teaser length: about 1k!
Release Date: sometime mid-july!
ask to be added to the taglist! also p.s. everyone should read do androids dream bc it’s a very good book!!!
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[read the teaser under the cut!]
Taeyong blinks calmly, watching them lay out their supplies—a tape measure, pins, a notepad. [Y/N] is young, but already they’ve made a name for themself in the fashion industry. They’ve styled many celebrities, and LSM Inc. snatched them up at first chance to outfit their idols. Before Taeyong met them, he’d heard they were good with AI robots. It’s true.
They pinch at the fabric of the shirt Taeyong’s already wearing. “We need to bring this in,” they say, looking up at him. “I want to highlight your waist.”
My waist. Normally people talk about Taeyong’s cheekbones or his jawline. “We could crop it,” he suggests tentatively.
They smile warmly. “We could, if you’d like. I think it would look nice.” They deftly fold the fabric up, simulating a crop, so that just an inch of Taeyong’s skin shows. They meet Taeyong’s gaze in the mirror, eyes questioning. “How’s that?”
Taeyong nods. “I like it.”
“Me, too.” They start with the pins, fingers nimble. Taeyong relaxes his shoulders. With other stylists, it’s not always wise to offer his own opinions. Mostly they treat him like a doll, or maybe a mannequin—they rarely ask him for input, or speak to him at all except to tell him how to position himself as they work. It’s not that it bothers Taeyong—no one is cruel to him, which is all that matters—but it’s nice to be able to chime in about his clothing from time to time. It’s also nice that he can chat with [Y/N] as they work, instead of standing in awkward silence. It makes the time pass more quickly. 
This is not his first fitting with [Y/N], but they are still relatively new to the team. And yet, Taeyong has found an easy sort of familiarity with them even after just a few meetings. It’s mostly because they actually treat him like he has a brain and social skills. Both synthetic, but who’s counting, right?
It seems a lot of people are. Taeyong was not born. He was brought into being. He was created, and he will outlive the hands that created him. This excites some, and frightens others. Taeyong isn’t sure how he feels about it. He supposes, like with everything else, he feels nothing at all. 
It’s not that Taeyong is emotionless, or completely void of opinions or feelings. He was given a moral compass, after all: good and bad, right and wrong (he is good, and he does the right things). It’s just that most things don’t bother him one way or another. He knows that’s part of his programming, but because it’s part of his programming, he doesn’t care. He still has plenty of learned emotional displays, and his technicians always told him that his affective responses were off the charts for a robot; so like a human’s. But things that would make a human—or even a less carefully-programmed robot—angry, or sad or scared or whatever else, hit some kind of wall inside of him, and bounce away, harmless. 
He was told in his classes that the lack of emotionality protects him and makes him better at doing his job, and better at functioning day-to-day, than a human. Taeyong can accept this as true. He’s pretty sure, however, that it protects humans from him. It makes him less volatile. No matter how hard humans try, they always end up making robots a little too strong. He knows a lot of people are afraid of him because of this. Though no one has said anything explicitly, he’s also pretty sure that were his emotional centers to malfunction—were the blockers to fail—he would be retired immediately. He’s heard whisperings of past generations of robots, of older prototypes that had, suddenly, and without warning, been retired. And since he belongs to a research corporation, his retirement would be slow and painful—they’d want to dissect him and understand what went wrong.
But Taeyong is well-made. He doesn’t think it’ll be a problem.
Another thing he’s pretty sure about is that [Y/N], unlike many, many people, is not afraid of him. They are good with AI robots because they don’t treat robots like they are robots. They treat them like they would anybody else. Taeyong doesn’t have to school himself around them. If he makes a sudden movement, they don’t flinch. He likes that about [Y/N].
“How have you been?” [Y/N] asks as they reach for more pins.
“Good,” Taeyong says. It’s a script he’s familiar with. One is not supposed to be honest when asked something like that in casual conversation. Taeyong hasn’t been good. Taeyong has been fine. Taeyong has been neutral. He has practice, recording, filming, and then he goes back to his dorm to rest. It’s monotonous, but not terrible. “How are you?”
“Busy,” [Y/N] replies. “But I don’t mind that. Lee Sooman-seonsangnim has me working with RVel.V now, too.”
“Oh.” Taeyong feels a spark of interest. The RVel.V robots came before the S127 line. They rarely see them, except in passing, so Taeyong’s always a little curious to hear about them. “I don’t know them that well,” he says. “What are they like?”
“A bit like you guys,” [Y/N] says. Their tone is fond, Taeyong registers. “And a bit not. Their leader is not like you at all,” they add with a short laugh. “She’s very commanding and it takes her a while to warm up to people, I think.”
“I am warm?” Taeyong asks, puzzled.
“To me,” [Y/N] says. 
“People say I’m scary,” Taeyong says, and [Y/N] laughs again. 
“That’s because most people only see you on stage,” they tell him. “Okay, let’s look at the next outfit.” They step away so Taeyong can slip behind the divider to change. 
Taeyong undresses, running his hands over his waist for a moment before he pulls the next shirt on. He doesn’t think often about his body. He was made a certain way and there isn’t much he can do to change it, so there isn’t a point. He doesn’t really consider if certain parts of his body are good or nice or pretty; he’s told that he’s handsome, and he knows he was made with that intent. His face is symmetrical; he has wide eyes and pouty lips, and to some, that makes him beautiful. 
Some humans say that they were made in the image of their creator, that they are smaller, less perfect versions of their God. Taeyong thinks their God is cruel. Taeyong thinks they know this, because when they make robots, they make them more perfect. More beautiful. Taeyong is made the in the image of his creators, but better. It is precisely because of this that half of the humans love him, and the other half despise him. He knows they all envy him. 
Maybe that God was onto something, after all.
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positivexcellence · 11 days ago
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thebigpygmy: Big news below! So grateful for you brother! @jaredpadalecki has been an encouragement to both me and especially Rayden over the past year and a half journey. Rayden has watched every episode of the original #walker Texas Ranger as I did as a kid. He’s been catching some of the new reboot that started in January that Jared plays Walker in! People amaze me! We are so quick to see the bad and I feel our culture and media is too slow to recognize the good, like this, and I believe there are many more good apples than bad apples out in the world. 🕊🍎 When people take their time and go out of their way to encourage someone... That is truly valuable. You don’t have to be someone of influence, or “significance,” we are ALL significant. We all matter. We are all one. We were MADE for each other. Jared was celebrating his dads 70th and reached out to us while I was with Rayden. You should have seen him light up! Then the next day Jared called back and encouraged even my mama saying, “I need to check your ID because I’m sure you are actually Justin’s sister and too young to have had him!” Things like this aren’t too big for anyone to do, right? He put a smile on all of Raydens family’s face, and then my mamas and mine! We can be a positive light as we go throughout our day to day. A challenge this message gave me today was to have my head on a swivel and look for someone I can love or somewhere I can make a difference. I hope this finds you well, and I hope it’s a loving nudge to love someone around you... Even if that’s simply being loving towards yourself. I’m learning an important lesson. Sometimes we have to love ourselves like our life depends on it. Because IT DOES. The life you want to live starts with you. Love yourself, and love those around you, it’s life changing. Okay, for the news! Looks like filming of season 1 finishes in about a week or two. When season two starts filming in a few months... It looks like we will be bringing Rayden and family down to #Austin or the mighty #ATX to watch some filming! Rayden and his little brother Brock will be BLOWN AWAY! I can’t wait. Thank you to the #walkertexasranger team for extending the invitation ☺️🙏
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Questions Questions
The other day when I was bored to fucking death I once again decided to get all in babe´s face for entertainment purposes with some stupid ass questions from a “random questions” website haha. Just like the old days. On ICfuckingQ. I´m sure he was delighted xD Anyway I liked the questions so much that I thought that´s actually something we could do here too *mwahaha* The website is https://www.brightful.me/blog/random-questions-to-ask-start-a-conversation/ These questions DO NOT come from my own brilliant mess of a mind. Just for crystal clarity. Here we go. Oh hell no that´s gonna get deeeeeep.
1. If You Had Three Wishes, What Would You Wish For?
*people to be more considerate as in QUIET first and foremost, the blocks that keep me from being all of me and doing what I love - basically from going all in in this life to be goooooone, my loved ones to be able to heal and flourish as well 
2. What Would You Rather Throw Away: Love Or Money?
*money. although it´s pretty shit to live in this world without it. it´s not evil, it´s just a tool...love however is everything. always
3. What’s The Most Beautiful Place You’ve Ever Seen?
*probably something on pinterest while looking for little lake houses surrounded by forest...irl definitely Italy & Bavaria
4. What Was Your Fondest Memory Of High School?
*gushing over boys we crushed on? dunno xD
5. What’s Your Favorite TV Show?
*GILMORE GIRLS
6. What’s The Strangest Thing In Your Refrigerator?
*moon water from last years Halloween
7. Would You Rather Hear The Music Of Johann Sebastian Bach Played By A Barbershop Quartet, Or A Heavy Metal Band?
*definitely heavy metal band^^
8. Have You Ever Been To A Five Star Resort?
*don´t think so haha
9. What Was Your Favorite Toy Growing Up?
*gameboy? dunno, didn´t really play that much...rather created stuff
10. What’s The Funniest Way You’ve Ever Broken The Law?
*not funny, I just took a really beautiful looking light blue fake crystal as a kid
11. What’s Your Favorite Sports Team?
*man I hate sports and watching sports is even worse^^
12. What Talent Would You Want To Possess If You Could?
*I think you can possess all the talents you want if you really get yourself into it. I'm pretty good with the ones I have :)
13. If You Could Trade Lives With Someone, Who Would It Be?
*I would never trade my life. It's so beautiful :)
14. If You Could Erase One Event From History, Which One Would You Erase?
*I would erase wars. Wars are horrifying and unnecessary. One could argue people need certain things to learn but looking around these days I'm not sure the majority really does. Learn from the past.
15. What Was Your Favorite Toy As A Child?
*Didn't we already have that question? I loved stuffed animals. Still do.
16. Who Do You Most Like To Poke Fun At?
*the people I love :3
17. If You Were Suddenly Transported To Another Planet, How Would You Assess The Situation?
*look around, ask: "why me man? xD how ridiculous are you trying to be life?" and then probably go look for water and food?
18. When Do You Feel The Most In Control?
*in nature
19. Would You Rather Have 10 Hobbies Or One Passion?
*passion over everything
20. What’s Your Favorite Movie?
*Harry Potter 1
21. If You Could Interview A Famous Person, Who Would You Choose?
*Martin my love Freeman
22. If Your Food Is Bad At A Restaurant, Would You Say Something?
*definitely
23. If You Could Only Use One Word The Rest Of Your Life, What Word Would You Choose?
*meow
24. What Are Your Dreams And Ambitions?
25. You’ve Been Given An Elephant. You Can’t Get Rid Of It. What Would You Do With It?
26. What’s The Funniest Thing You’ve Seen On The News?
27. If You Had The World’s Attention For 30 Seconds, What Would You Say?
28. If You Could Be Best Friends With A Celebrity, Who Would It Be?
29. If You Were To Play A Song You Love Right Now, What Would It Be?
30. Would You Rather Look Like A Potato, Or Feel Like A Potato?
31. What Would You Do With 10 Million Dollars?
32. How Can You Tell If Someone Has A Sense Of Humor?
33. If You Were To Name Your Own Song, What Would You Name It?
34. If You Were In A Room Filled With You And Your Doppelganger And 2 Million Dollars, What Would You Do?
35. What Is In Your Fridge Right Now?
36. What Have You Learned About Life From Kids?
37. How Would You Want To Be Remembered?
38. What Do You Hope Your Deceased Relative Would Say About You If They Saw You Now?
39. If You Could Change Your Name, What Would You Change It To?
40. What’s The Strangest Thing That You’ve Ever Fallen In Love With?
41. If You Could Have Any Super Power, Which One Would You Choose?
42. If You Were Invited To Attend Hogwarts, Which Hogwarts House Would You Choose?
43. What Were The Highlights Of Your Childhood?
44. Have You Ever Kept A Secret For More Than A Decade?
45. What’s The Most Important Thing You’ve Learned From A Celebrity?
46. Do You Care About Reviews?
47. What Would Be The Perfect Crime?
48. What’s The Stupidest Thing You’ve Ever Done?
49. Spontaneity Or Stability?
50. What’s The Funniest Movie You’ve Ever Seen?
51. When Did You Last Meet A Stranger You Thought You’d Never Meet Again?
52. Do You Save Or Spend?
53. How Much Does The Amount Of Traffic Affect Your Mood?
54. If You Had To Choose One Animal To Have As A Pet, Which Animal Would You Choose?
55. What’s Your Worst Habit?
56. Do they like to take a stand or just let things go?
57. What’s Your Favorite Song?
58. How Do You Think The World Would Be Different If Bananas Were Illegal?
59. Would You Rather Be Able To Control Time, Or Be Able To Know What Other People Are Thinking?
60. Is It Difficult To Do What You Do?
61. Who Is Your Favorite Celebrity?
62. If You Found $2,000 On The Ground, What Would You Do With It?
63. What’s Your Favorite Pizza Topping?
64. What Would You Do If You Could Possess The Abilities Of Your Dog?
65. What’s The Smartest Thing You’ve Ever Done?
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talvin-muircastle · 18 days ago
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Am I Queer? It’s Controversial.
This is going to be long, and it’s going to cover a lot of ground, so please bear with me.  
Recently, this article came to my attention:
https://www.healthline.com/health/gender-nonconforming
I have spent a fair amount of time questioning my own sexuality/identity, and having it questioned by others.  Now approaching five full decades of life, I feel comfortable saying:
I identify as Male, and Straight.
I am Gender Non-Conforming by the standards of the culture I come from.
But I am not comfortable saying this qualifies me as “Queer” or otherwise under LGBTQIA+.   
That article (which is by no means the Last Word on the subject) identifies several areas where I do not conform to my AMAB status as culturally defined:
I have long hair.  But I also have a thick beard and moustache, and I like that combination.  Still, I grew up in a place where long hair on a guy meant you were A) Queer or B) into Heavy Metal.   Even though my teen years saw me sporting a military-style buzzcut more often than not, I tended to hang out with the Metalheads.  My long hair continues to be a point of contention with my conservative relatives and in-laws.   Some of them think I am a Hippie, which is funny because I am allergic to Cannabis.  Wanna watch me fight for breath and puke?  Blow weed smoke in my face.  
I am a Stay-At-Home Dad and Homemaker.  I have been the breadwinner for this family, but that is not part of my identity.  I am quite content to let my wife handle that part of things, and so is she.  I have been a Dad longer than I have been a father, in fact:  for most of my life I have been mentoring teenagers that find their way to me seeking advice, comfort, acceptance, and guidance.    I spent a lot of time worrying about what career should I follow, and it took me far too long to understand and accept that Dad was what I was after.  A woman seeking motherhood as a career is validated, a man seeking fatherhood in the same context is not conforming.  
When I was younger, I got hit with one hell of a double-standard: while wanting to be a Dad as a goal is not acceptable, I was supposed to go out there and sow my wild oats.  OK, I wasn’t really supposed to get girls pregnant, but I was supposed to try.  Wait, what? Try that again?  OK, if you were a teenaged boy in the 80s and 90s and I am pretty sure before that (not sure after, AIDS changed a lot of thinking all around), you were not supposed to get a girl pregnant, but you were supposed to make an attempt as often as possible, in fact you were supposed to score but fail.  If you are confused, don’t feel bad: I was living steeped in this paradox 24/7/365 and came out of it real confused.
Meanwhile, I was looking for a long-term, meaningful relationship with a woman who could be a partner in my life, and avoiding the one-night stands I was supposed to be after according to the standards of my culture, and so many of the people around me—parents, teachers, peers—decided that I must be Queer.  And that was Not A Good Classification To Find Yourself In in Rural Tennessee of the 80’s and 90’s.   Lacking real support, I entered adulthood like a trainwreck still skidding down the tracks, confused as hell and desperately trying to please people whose opinions mattered to me far more than they should.  I did finally find that relationship, and we celebrate 21 years of marriage this month.  Meanwhile I can’t keep track of who has gotten divorced and remarried from that crowd anymore.   
I am not a fan of American Football.  (I am not a fan of soccer, which is football to the rest of the world, but that’s not going to get you labeled Queer in the USA as yet.)   Even so, I got recruited to be the Football Manager for my high school football team, and then I spent several years studying to be an Athletic Trainer in college as an add-on to my English and Education degree.  The fact that I spent 7 years of my life on the sidelines of football games (and basketball, and baseball) and still do not really understand the rules of those sports should have been a clear sign to me that I was trying to conform and failing badly.  An American Male of my generation is supposed to like these things, he is supposed to scream at the television or scream from the stands when watching a game, he is supposed to have a Favorite Team and Wear Their Stuff.
Yeah, that’s not me.  I don’t like combative sports.  I like things that involve grace, beauty, and art.   Figure skating (either gender, singles, but especially pairs) is fun to watch.  The more artistic of gymnastics events are nice (uneven bars and vault are kinda boring, but I love watching floor exercise.)  Watching someone do tricks on a skateboard is more interesting to me than an MMA bout.  I enjoy the art of it.   I used to watch WWF Wrestling as a kid, but I found I enjoyed the “story” more than the violence.  Martial arts practice that is done like a dance is more interesting than watching two people try to kick each other in the face for real.   
I’m told I am supposed to like these things.  I am told that not liking them makes me less masculine.  
This extends into online gaming as well.  Oh, I like some combat games.  We aren’t going to talk about how many hours I have played the XCOM series.  But…I don’t like PVP or multiplayer. I like the story arc, and accomplishing things.  Minecraft?  I like building, and killing mobs is very secondary to that.  In single-player I usually just go peaceful mode and explore the world, build grand railways and tunnels, create comfortable houses or make a home under a lake with a glass roof under the water.  In World of Warcraft I spent more time exploring the world and getting cool screenshots than worrying about getting Phat Loot and XP.  I would take a whole afternoon just to escort a couple of new players through dangerous territory so they could find their friends.  
I have gotten a lot of grief over that.  I am supposed to go out and kill kill kill stab stab stab get the loot!  
And I am supposed to get more than the other person.  It’s competition.  Men are supposed to compete.  And if you can’t get more than the other guy you go dump buckets of lava on his house and laugh at the noob.  
I hate that.  
By the standards I was raised with, I am gender nonconforming.  I most definitely do not conform to the expectations that were laid upon me from my youth.
Does that make me Queer?   I am not comfortable claiming that.
The standards I was held to can also be considered Toxic Masculinity.  They hold that Queer==Less Of A Man.  “Queer” is not “Less.”  I was raised to think it is, but I have learned, and grown, and I know that it is not.  I also do not accept that I, myself, am Less.  The very premise of me being labeled Queer by those people is wrong on all counts.   I am different. I have always known that.  I believe that “Man” and “Male” can encompass more than violence, bullying, and competition.  I also know full well that many who identify as “Woman” and “Female” embrace those as ideals as well.  
I am no stranger to violence.  My life has often been violent.  I have fought off muggers who were armed with knives, I have stared down the barrel of a gun, I have been beaten because someone else wanted to establish himself as the dominant male in our school just after he moved there.  I am not a pacifist: the only reason I have not killed another human being in self-defense is because I was outnumbered.   I just don’t feel that defines my gender, and I have been told it should.  I fight to survive and to protect others, not to prove that I can.  
Others who look like me are guarding statues of Columbus with their Assault Rifles because they feel their masculinity is threatened.  This is another area where I do not conform to my expected gender roles.   Not only do I not feel my masculinity is threatened by BLM, or Pride, or the existence of Trans folks, I no longer feel my masculinity can be threatened.  I spent so many years under attack from “my” side, and gotten so much support from “their” side, that I now understand that my gender is not about what THEY think.  It is MY identity. I OWN it.  I am who I am regardless of their perception of me. Nothing someone else does can take that from me. 
And if anything about me is Queer, it is that: the understanding that my identity belongs to me and not to those who seek to mislabel me.  
I have been told by some in the Queer community that I am welcome among them, and I am grateful for that.  So, so many of my stories can be prefaced with, “There I was, the only Straight Guy in the room, when:”  I am proud to be an Ally.  
But calling myself Queer?  I’m not comfortable doing that.  I could, and I know some who would accept it.  But I feel it is more important to me to break the toxic definition of Masculinity and show that things like nurturing, caring, creating, dancing, loving, uplifting, and oh yes parenting, these ARE Male Qualities, always have been, and should always be.   No criticism of GNC folks who take the Queer label intended or implied: they are not Less, they own their own identity, they are valid.   They are themselves, and have a right to be. 
I am me.
I am a Man.
I will never be the Man they wanted me to be, and I am PROUD of that. 
Happy Pride Month.  
Don’t let the bastards get you down.
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holdmyhopeinyourhands · 20 days ago
A few hours back you said that if anybody needs to talk about what happened this weekend in MotoGP, you will be here for us. You can just ignore this, but I need to take it from my chest (and I don't feel like dumping it again to MotoGPblr).
I feel very guilty. Last year was Jason's first year in Moto3. He was a rookie and he didn't do very well, so it was just another rider for me. This year he was doing much better, and I was looking at him and thinking I want him to win to be on the podium.
I have a MotoGP blog, but I didn't post a lot about him. So, I feel so ashamed for not looking at him or posting about him.
When he crashed yesterday I watched the session live, but for some reason I didn't see the crash live and my concern was Ayumu because I saw him in the gravel trap and his bike, but not Jason's.
After learning that Jason was in critical condition, I couldn't bring myself to search the crash until several hours later. Normally for me, it's worst not knowing, so I HAD to see the crash.
I knew Jason condition was critical after Alcobas comment, after the medical team using hemodynamically stable instead of simple, stable, but I just wanted a fucking miracle.I just feel so bad.
I feel so bad with myself.
I wish I had posted about Jason before, I wish this wouldn't have happened.
*hugs you very very tight*
Hey sweetie, I know telling you not to feel ashamed or bad isn't going to do much but I'm going to say it anyways. You shouldn't feel terrible about yourself. You couldn't have known hon. Hindsight and all that right?
There are so many drivers, so you couldn't have possibly been able to post about all of them. And there is nothing wrong with liking some drivers more than others. You shouldn't feel guilty because of that. Awful things happen to good people all the time. Snuffing out beautiful souls despite how much they deserve better and sometimes, only then do we look back and mourn the opportunity to have known them better.
I don't even watch motogp that much and even I felt awful to have not known much about him so I can't image how you feel right now but sweetie please. You shouldn't feel guilty. How could you have possibly known. It's not like you disliked or hated him. You were just busy celebrating those you did have interest in and before Jason could be one of those people, he was taken from us too soon.
In the end, non of us know the future or the tragedies that come with it and sometimes we feel regret and guilt and sadness for having lost the opportunity to have enjoyed the people that were taken from us. But we also need to remember that we can't see the future and we can't know.
Jason was young and wonderful and loved and he will be missed. But don't put blame on your shoulders. *hugs you again*
I don't know if my words will do anything but I hope they at least bring you a little comfort.
Hugs and kisses sweetie. You're always welcome to talk to me. Lots of love.
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neopalette · 22 days ago
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light me up
pairing: jaehyun x reader genre: fluff, friends to lovers, basketball player jaehyun words: 1.3K
masterlist submit your requests
tags: @cosmiclatte28
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It was the anniversary of your school, which meant that for a whole week the different clubs and sports teams would have events.
Today was the basketball game and you were on the bench cheering along with everyone for the team, especially for Jaehyun and Ten who were part of your friends circle.
The cheers and excitement filled the air, both teams were tied and there were only thirty seconds left.
“TEN, YOU BETTER PUT THE DAMN BALL IN THE BASKET” Donghyuk screamed, gaining laughs from the people around you.
People focused on you with funny looks “Oh, I’m used to this” you said and proceed to drink your coke. It was true, with your friends around chaos was never missing and honestly you loved it.
A slight shove from Jungwoo almost made you choke “Look! Jaehyun has the ball!”
Everyone started screaming as the clock had only ten seconds left. You started to get really excited, adrenaline rushing through your body just by seeing him.
With two seconds on the clock, Jaehyun‘s shot made it to the basket, winning against Whimoon High School; one of their biggest and strongest rivals.
The excited crowd screamed and he ran to his teammates, hugging and congratulating each other for the great work. His chest went up and down as he tried to recover his breath, practically showered in sweat and tired, he looked at the bench trying to find his friends.
Mark and Haechan pointed at him, and danced moving their arms without grace or rhythm, just playing around. He smiled and then he focused on you.
You were standing and screaming with the other guys. Your hands collided with each other and the moment felt surreal, as if time slowed down. His heart was beating faster when you looked at him and smiled
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To celebrate today’s victory, you went to eat at the hamburger restaurant. Jaehyun and Ten were really happy about the game, so were the rest of you. This was one of your favorite moments, everyone laughing at Jungwoo, Donghyuk and Mark’s jokes, Ten and Johnny being in charge of everyone since they’re the seniors and being the best duo... and there’s Jaehyun and you, going with the flow and being happy with everyone.
“I tried some brownies with Jeno the other day” Hachan says with excitement and drank from his soda “Why no one told us that they take almost an hour to make effect? I ate the whole bag” he said upset.
“Dude, just read the instructions” Mark said.
“How the fuck am I supposed to understand them if I’m high”
You rolled your eyes “Because you read them before eating the thing, dumbass” Ten looked at everyone “I don’t think they come with instructions”
“See” Hyuck pointed at you “And don’t call me dumbass, dumbass” he said “At least I don’t wear my uniform backsides”
“In my defense, I saw Jaehyun wearing it like that and I thought it was the right way” You said.
Jaehyun's ears turned hot pink and he threw his head back “I thought we would never talk about this again” Everyone laughed at the memory. “How did you not notice” Jungwoo said massaging his cheeks that felt like they would explode for laughing and smiling the whole night.
“I was nervous and I got late to the venue. I had to change in the backseat of the car” You palmed his back and he hid his face in your shoulder. He was laughing and whining about it.
It was 10:00 pm when everyone was saying goodbye outside the restaurant. The boys looked at Jaehyun as if they were trying to tell him something, but he would shake his head and ignore them. It was weird but you didn’t pay much attention.
Jaehyun and you stopped a taxi and waved your hands to the boys. You lived two streets apart. So he usually walked you home.
This is how little by little he became became closer to you, each trip from school to your house you talked about you and your lives. Joking about your days and your own tragedies. With Jaehyun you felt free and without the worry of having to act perfect. He felt like home.
And he felt the same way. He loved hearing your voice and making you laugh at his bad jokes. But lately your friendship started to change. Every day was harder to say goodbye to him, you wanted to be with him every minute possible. The slightest touch from him made you blush and sometimes you would start taking nonsense when he was around. The guys knew about your feelings and encouraged you to tell him, but you were too scared of you possibly ruining your friendship.
He paid the driver and you walked home. He looked serious, as if he was thinking about something. “You okay?” You asked, twenty minutes ago he was alright and now he seemed stressed and worried “I’m just tired” You nodded and kept walking by his side. Actually he just wanted to hold your hand, but he didn’t.
When you were outside your home you looked at him and smiled “You played amazing today, I’m proud of you Jae” His gaze softened and finally looked at you “Thank you for cheering for me” you closed your eyes when his hand played with your hair, messing it up a little bit.
“You should go, it’s late” you told him. But he didn’t want to go. Why was it so hard to express his real feelings for you. “Yeah, goodnight Y/N” “Night Jae”
You closed the door and walked to your room. You looked through the window and he walked away. “I’m so stupid, he doesn’t see me the same way” you thought.
Your mind kept messing with your heart.
After taking a shower, you laid on your bed to watch a movie. Usually you would sleep early, but it was Friday and you wanted to distract yourself from everything.
Ten minutes of the movie had passed when someone knocked on the door. “Y/N! It’s for you” Your mom practically screamed from the other side of your house.
You walked to the entrance and saw Jaehyun sitting on the stairs “Jaehyun? What are you doing?” You said worried. Maybe something happened at home and that’s why he was so serious during the ride. “I just wanted to see you” His voice was low. “But you saw me an hour ago”
He sighed “I don’t know how to say this” You looked at him even more worried and he noticed “It’s nothing bad, but I really need to tell you about it” “I’m listening” You sat next to him, your shoulder brushing his arm. "Okay uhmm... we’ve been friends for so long and these have been the best years of my life. You’re always there for me and I know I’m not good enough and I have flaws. But you understand me better than myself and I’m thankful for that and for having you in my life” he closed his eyes and proceeded “I don't know what you did to me, but I like it... I like you” His eyes were focused on you, glowing with admiration and love.
You smiled “So we feel the same” He looked at you with big eyes and it seemed that a huge weight was lifted from his shoulders. The tension in his body disappeared when he heard your words and took his hand "Jeong Jaehyun, we are fools for not realizing it. But now we know. I like you too”
A smile finally appeared on his face. His beautiful dimples adorned his cheeks and you couldn’t help but to put you hand on his cheek, never breaking the eye contact.
This was the moment that both of you realized how much you needed and wanted each other. I felt as if your world had been lit up.
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awrldalone · 23 days ago
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27th May 2021, 11.42pm
So it’s over. I have no tests, oral interrogations, exams left. Just one essay, due the 30th, but that can wait. I feel relieved, but emptied: midway between having exhaled and having fallen and hit the ground, the air forced out of my lungs.
Yesterday morning I almost had an asthma attack because of allergies, I could not breathe during Math class. It got better later in the day, but I left school earlier. I might have taken a little advantage of the situation, but the hours of school when I have no tests or interrogations feel dull. I have slowly realised how, for the past couple of months, it has not been about learning, it’s been about being tested and getting good grades. 
But I do hate this immune system fallacy. It makes me want to take everything in my room and throw it away. No bed, no pillow, no books, no things. Just clean, tidy, white. Light, immaculate, empty.
Today I woke up feeling better. It took me longer than usual to get ready, just a couple of minutes more, but it made me arrive just in time for first period, whereas usually I’m always early. I did stop for a coffee, and the air was warm so I just looked at the buildings in front of the station, on the other sid eof the bank. The weather has been better. It’s still unpredictable, voluble, but it’s getting warmer. It’s also, still, too cold for late May. 
When the pressure of academic performance is lifted, the brain is left to breathe. Except my brain is breathing the poisonous fumes of itself. It should be benefitting from being more relaxed, but I just find myself wandering in dark places. It’s also weird how a good day will make feel all the bad days like an exaggeration, an irrational hyperbole. Good days basically invalidate any bad feeling.
Today was a good day. In the afternoon, with C., I went to a small rose garden. The maritime pines bent over when everything flooded a few years ago, so they put up wooden racks to hold them from collapsing. 
(Side note I thought about this morning, instead of paying attention in class: how come people think the tower of Pisa will fall on its side? Towers collapse, fall from the bottom, fall on themselves) 
On these wooden rods, roses of all colors grow. Red, yellow, pink, white, yellow and pink, red and yellow, hot pink. Some of the roses were near the end of their lives, the petals open and supple, inviting insects to bathe in the pollen. Others were still buds, or were firm, newly blossomed. 
I brought my film camera and took some pictures. We got ice cream. I did not like mine, I found it tasted very artificial, but I did not tell her. Sometimes it’s better not to complain. 
Walking around, we saw a lot of people wearing green and orange, this city’s soccer team’s colors. They had a match tonight. They won. And people were already celebrating in the afternoon, beer in the hand, a flag in the other. Venice is in serie A now.
We watched the seagulls, it rained lightly and then it stopped, but since the wind had begun to blow we decided to go home.
p.s. I like it when people text in messages that are divided. I tend to write everything in the same text, but when people divide the phrase in two - let’s say when they say the apodosis, hit send, and then say the protasis – it feels like they are excited. Eager to tell you something.
-c.
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I'm here! Finally answering these Anon Asks!
1. It is real (for now) 😅 It'll be very different than before - exclusive to Paramount+, not including all of the original cast*, only 10 episodes, and will be focused on one case rather than a procedural.
* The main S15 cast was invited back. Kirsten is not returning, and I think Daniel Henney will be busy on his new show. Matthew mentioned not really wanting to, but he was willing to reconsider. Paget and Joe have been very vocal supporters of the reboot, but Paget has been calling for fans to support her in negotiations.
We'll see. Not much has been decided yet. You can read more here.
2. You're my favorite and I hope you get all the hugs and kisses you desire, friend 😚
3. Yeah... I really blame the writers. They clearly wanted her to be some weird, stereotypical "spunky" girl. But, naturally, the writing team is riddled with misogyny and a deep misunderstanding of women, lmao. RLC is an amazing actress. I don't know what she could have done to save that mess of a character.
I really think her character was unnecessary on top of all of that. Spencer's final arc was about how he spent his whole life basing his worth and purpose on the women in his life (his Mother, JJ, Maeve, Cat). Date Night would have been a lot more meaningful if, after he got closure with Cat, he realized that he was still his own person, and would continue to exist after she was gone, and that he was going to be okay.
They could've done something great... but, alas...
4. Awe, of course! Like I mentioned before, I am planning on collecting Dad!Spencer fics to post on Father's Day. I hope that they all comfort you and reassure you that, even though your Father failed you, there are still so many people who will love and appreciate you, and we want you to know it!
5. So, there is a sequel to the book (which I have not read!) where he ends up in a remarkably similar situation. Here is the summary:
A month after narrowly surviving the most harrowing night of his life, Chip Taylor is living in a seedy, pay-by-the-week motel in a sleepy coastal town in Florida. He still has most of the 68 grand he and his crazy ex-girlfriend stole back in Tennessee, but he's a man living at loose ends, directionless and without a plan. He's drinking too much and surrendering to too many of the same temptations that landed him in so much trouble in the first place. It isn't long before Chip finds himself wrapped up in another nightmarish descent into bloody madness and chaos. And this time his survival is more in doubt than ever.
That is, obviously, super depressing, lmao. Probably realistic, too, honestly. I personally like to believe that he got a decent job and lived a modest life. He met a very sweet person that treated him well. He got therapy and spent the rest of his life being perfectly mediocre and happy about it. But to be honest, I haven't thought about it a lot!
6. Angst is a category of literature, although the term is usually used exclusively in fanfiction. Here is a simple definition from Urban Dictionary that, I feel, summarizes it well:
An adjective describing a situation or literary piece which contains dark, depressing, angry, and/or brooding emotions from the participating characters.
7. Ugh, I'm so sorry that you had a bad experience. Medications can be so hard. For you for take steps, even in such a state, to try to self-soothe is extremely impressive and you should be proud of yourself!
I'm glad you exist, too, and I'm so happy to hear that my mindless Spotify collections provided you some comfort in such an awful time.
I hope you have a wonderful day, too. Long-term medication regimens are seriously exhausting, and you are doing a great job. Keep it up, friend! You deserve so much happiness in life, and I'm so proud of you for taking care of yourself the best you can.
8. [NSFW] Hi friend! I can't say much on this subject, as I'm not a lesbian myself, but I do want to assure you that I've heard other lesbians, gay men, and aroace people express similar sentiments!
The truth is, to me, erotica is completely different aspect of enjoyment than the physical acts of sex. There are many things I enjoy reading or watching that I would never engage in physically. When you view erotica as a form of expression, separate from the expression of physicality, you might find that the true divide isn't the gender of the characters, but the emotions and connections established.
TL;DR, I'm very sorry you're feeling confused, but I know a ton of lesbians who enjoy reading het erotica, and you shouldn't necessarily feel like you are less valid of a lesbian because you like erotica works (written predominantly by women, mind you!).
Also, if your friends mock you for reading fanfiction, they kind of sound like jerks. There isn't much difference between fanfic and published works such as Outlander, which have remarkable success. You could always just say you read that (the smut scenes are, IMO, significantly less cringy in Outlander than other mainstream erotica, such as 50 Shades).
I hope that you get some relief from the frustration you're feeling. If you decide that you're bisexual and just heavily lean to women, I am happy to celebrate that with you, but I'm just as excited to celebrate if you decide that you are still a lesbian! 💕
Best of luck, friend. I'm happy you're here no matter what ☺️
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honorarytenenbaum · 23 days ago
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At the end, it’s still you
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Summary: For two people who claimed they meant a lot to one another, they sure knew how to make the other feel hollow.
Warnings: Alcohol, angst, and a little smut.
Notes: It’s inspired by a Kenzo short film and a scene from “Fallen Angels” by Wong Kar Wai. It’s a drabble and a stream-of-consciousness work. Let me know if it’s worth anything. I blame @limenysnocket and @olyvoyl​
youtube
Pairing: Taika Waititi x Reader 
Tag list: @zeldasayer  @limenysnocket  @donutwheel  @fleurderuine @kat12kat @minigirl87 @olyvoyl  @whatwememeintheshadows  @typistphotographer @mrtommyshelby @cagestark @davidbowie24​ @ohmagawd-life​ @peaches-n-mean​
“Are we still partners?”
In a dimly lit part of the bar, they sat in a secluded booth. She had trouble lighting her cigarette. He extended the end of his cancer stick placed in between his lips. The two of them shared a glance and said nothing. Thanking him with a nod, they both leaned back on the couch, uncomfortable with the open-ended question they’re stuck with.
A lot has transpired in the span of a month. There were a lot left unsaid, voices left unheard, and actions left unseen. For two people who claimed they meant a lot to one another, they sure knew how to make the other feel hollow.
Her stare bore into him. As she lifted the cigarette closer to her lips, she felt herself shake. They haven’t seen or heard from each other for a month. Ever since they met, they were thick as thieves. Partners ’till the end.
Exchanging glances, they wondered in silence: Who’s this stranger sitting across from me?
He always drive pass her billboards in the city.
In waiting rooms during production meetings, he sees her in cover spreads. She is new Hollywood’s dream girl; bright, gorgeous, and overall a renaissance woman. Her cracks and faults were only reserved for him. The name she bore never reached a trending page in a bad light.
Seeing her around usually made him smile. How can he not be proud that his partner shines in her own right? After all they’ve been through, he’d argue she deserved success more than he did. To stand beside her through it all is an honor.
“Love being a part of that power couple, huh T?”
The receptionist noticed him staring at a cover of hers for too long. Although she was expecting him to show a proud smile, he only offered her a grimace without evading his gaze from the cover. He didn’t know pride could fade when personal egos come to play.
No one ever tells you what it meant to be part of a power couple. There’s what the public knows and what happens behind close doors. Whether it’s her or him, they both knew their imperfections in a biblical sense. It irked him more that she had reached a point where she clearly needed him.
As much as he loved celebrating her success, it had morphed into a monster he didn’t expect. He was his own person too. Not a ship name nor a hashtag.
He was his own person who had mastered his craft. Waiting for his shot this long, a part of him felt he wasted it on love. He didn’t entertain the thought before. But the ego hasn’t been satiated for a while now. And it wants to feed.
She doesn’t need me anymore. No, she doesn’t need you. No one does.
He looked up discreetly to see the receptionist’s face. Gnawing the bottom of his lip, he asked himself: Would her panties look good on a bathroom floor?
Absence makes the hard grow fonder.
She thought of that saying in repeat all throughout a tough, mundane photo shoot. To her, photoshoots were a dance. It’s theatre but applause are replaced by shutter sounds. And there weren’t any lines—only expressions.
People teased and yanked her hair all day long. With a smile and a giggle, she hid her frustrations on their lack of care for her locks. She would fight if she wasn’t what people framed her to be. But she has an image to protect, so the dragon within her remained seething yet unheard.
“You’re such a natural! I can’t do what you do.”
The glam team behind her shared the same sentiments. Carelessly letting herself speak her mind, she replied: “No, no you can’t.” Giggles behind her back died down in mere seconds. It woke her up to reality, realizing in an instant how she came off.
She faced them with a straight expression at first. To soften the blow, she broke out in a chuckle fit in hopes they’ll never see who she really was. They all began laughing with her. A sense of relief swept the room.
Slowly, oh so slowly her smile faded. It was a wonder how she made it all so easy. She had mastered the art of fake happy. When absence from the one you longed for happened quite often, you had no choice but to master what it meant it to be fake happy.
For her, absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder. It only chips away until emptiness is all you’d feel.
Did he feel the same with all this distance? Or did he yearned for her instead?
All he could hear was muffled moans.
Lust gave a high no drug could ever replicate. It’s the sensation of her walls tightening around him, her animalistic wails and praises for his cock, and the way she bounced for him. Everything was for him.
She chanted his name like an incantation for an old Greek god. With his ego stroked and teased, he began to feel like he was that god. This praises were for him. All this time of evaluating and doubting his worth were for nothing.
He was worth something—and it’s a lot. That one thought alone sent his body into ecstasy. Guiding her hips with his hands, he let her praise him for hours and hours. He wanted them both exhausted, filled to the brim.
She feeds him a slither of their cum interlaced between thighs. Reaching her fingers for a lick, just so he can get a taste of what she can offer that his partner could never give. He poked his tongue out as she jerks her hips for him.
At the end of the door, his partner stood across the hall. Their muffled moans were all she could hear.
She always scrolls by his tabloid exploits.
When she did get a chance to be on social media, all she could see where his mistakes for the world to see. It was beyond his control and hers. The price of their success was their privacy. Back then, it was an easy exchange.
Nowadays, she’s not so sure about that.
Did you know? Have you seen? Could you believe?
A smile and a click of her heels follow those questions every single time they were asked. Whether it’s in public or through a mention, she kept mum. She didn’t say a word to worsen the hole in their partnership.
When the sun goes down, she often sits by her lonesome in the house they used to share. Replaying the images of him with people who weren’t her. These images were interlaced with questions she never answer properly.
Swallowing the lump on her throat, she suppressed the loud “no” she wanted to scream ’till her vocal chords snap.
The viewfinder only let him see her.
No, not the model the brand had hired. But the only her in his life that he gave value to. The model was beautiful just like every model one meets. Or in his case, every model he slept with to feed something or forget something.
His path to greed had also led him back into the limelight. More projects came to his way and he couldn’t say no. Like what he stated before; “Why take a break when I’ve been break for 30 years?”
The more photos he snapped, the more his ego relished this given opportunity. He gave the model a coy smile. As he took more photos and gave more instructions, visions of her posing there before him flooded his mind.
Lowering his camera down for a second, he looked at the person before him. He studied their silhouette and their features. They gave him a smile and he smiled back out of societal politeness.
The sound of the shutter echoed across the room. With every snap, she appears to him again. But he hadn’t seen her for so long—why is she still here?
Who outgrew who? Who’s fault was it?
They’ve been together for so long. Quite frankly, they’re all each other had ever known. Stories were built between them. They both knew that.
Where did it all go wrong? That’s what she meant when she finally asked him: Are they still partners?
Partnership goes beyond eros. It’s built on past, on admiration, on mutual respect. They had a pact—a deal. Nothing would break them no matter what happens.
The perfect crime she had committed between them was staying despite everything he did for himself.
So she asked, “are we still partners?” All he left her with was silence. Leaving her with a kiss on her cheek, he paid the tab and walked away.
She watched him take every step as he walked off. Even when he was gone, she kept staring at the door. Her eyes got bleary but she didn’t know if it was the tears or exhaustion.
If she stared hard enough, maybe the man she knew would come back.
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isitbussinjanelle · 23 days ago
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Reposting this because I FINALLY have an Archiveofourown account! :D (also wanted to link this story for anyone who never got to read it. I also made some corrections and changes in this version).
https://archiveofourown.org/works/31558172
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“No no no no please rethink this ba!” Raya is currently following the chief of heart through the halls of the palace. The chief, benja, is busy planning on the upcoming summer festival, and doesn’t have time for Raya’s whining- again. He’s busy emailing the chiefs of other lands about things like food, and entertainment ideas.
“Dewdrop, what’s the big deal? Is it so hard to volunteer at the beach?” Benja complains as he turns around, with the glow of the phone screen shining on his face.
“Um- Yeah! Whenever I volunteer at the beach, Namaari and her fang posse are ALWAYS there, causing havoc and being loud, and they don’t give a damn!” Raya shouts. The staff of heart are looking over at this father-daughter quarrel, noticing Raya’s raise in tone.
“Dewdrop, I understand that Namaari has the tendency to be...rambunctious, but it’s for the community? What if you save someone from drowning! Think about that and not Namaari, eh?” Benja pats the side of Raya’s shoulder and walks over to Tao, the head of the heart land cook team to talk about dinner plans for the festival. Raya starts to walk after him but stops and pouts to her self.
“You good?” Sisu questions. She came from the kitchen with a bowl of spicy shrimp congee
“No- far from that. Ba’s making me volunteer at the beach.” Raya sulks in the chair behind her and rests her chin on her hand.
“Why do you sound sad? That’s a good thing! Beach’s are fun, and- beachy!” Sisu exclaims, taking a sip from her congee.
“There not super “beachy” when the person I despise most is there- Namaari.” Raya pouts and crosses her arms.
“Sure- “despise”. I think you should go though. And I’ll come too! I’ll be your wing-women,” Sisu walks away with a wink and whispers the last part, but that doesn’t stop Raya from over hearing this jeering remark from the dragon. Sisu knows that Namaari and Raya have a love hate relationship- and the flirty banter they show when there together proves just that.
~*~*~*~*
“We’re here,” Raya parks her Jeep and opens the car door. She’s wearing a scarlet read swim suit with the words, “life guard” on the front and, “Raya” Imprinted on the back, both in bold white letters. She’s also wearing her iconic bamboo hat.
Sisu jumps out of the trunk of the car with pool noodles and water guns.
“Time to terrorize as many kids as I can find- catch ya later Raya!” Sisu dashes to the area of the beach with the most children, prancing like a goblin. Raya puts her hand on her hip and laughs, afterwards applying sunscreen to her nose.
Raya scans the sun lit beach- no Namaari. Was this Raya’s lucky day? A day of...peace and quiet? She silently celebrated, but still looked around to make sure her hopes were true.
She suddenly feels a tall presence arrive behind her. Her bamboo hat nearly falls off as she shrieks with terror.
“Boo!” Namaari shakes Raya’s shoulders from behind in attempts of scaring her- it worked. Raya turned around in a defense position, only to realize it was her rival.
“Namaari,” Raya spat with a mean look, taking a good look at the tall, muscular women.
“What’s dripping dep la?” Namaari says nostalgically. She new that Raya hated it when Namaari called her Dep la.
“I told you to stop calling me that, undercut,” Raya crosses her arms and smirks. Namaari rolls her eyes at the remark.
“Wheres your little posse of fang people?” Raya asked with attitude. Namaari thought this was cute.
“Didn’t show- and I didn’t want them too. I wanted a day all to my self. To get a good beach work out in.” Namaari winked as she tossed the dumbell in her hand up in the air effortlessly and caught it.
Raya sucked her lips and tried not to stare at namaari’s biceps, which was very, very hard for her.
“Volunteering again?” Namaari teased with an eye brow quirk as she looked Raya up and down.
“Yes- is that a problem little miss muscles?” Raya responded, quite embarrassed by how she admitted to the fact that she was looking at Namaari’s biceps. This made Namaari chuckle deeply.
“Not at all, princess. Besides,” she leaned in closer, “I kinda like seeing you in your cute little bathing suit.” She looked Raya up and down once more, smirked, and turned to head towards the beach.
Raya stood their with her face red and her arms still crossed and completely still, her feet hot from the asphalt.
~*~*~*~*~
Sisu came to meet Raya at her life gaurd chair after a while.
“Good news- found lots of kids to scare. Bad news- I think their mothers called the cops so I might have to split later on,” Sisu chuckled.
“Yeah. Uh huh.” Raya responded, only half listening because she was busy watching Namaari do high knees and bicep curls and sit ups. Hot. Hot. Hot- Was all Raya could think about. But she would never actually say that, ew.
Sisu soon noticed what Raya was so occupied by, and teased, “hmm...interesting. Namaari is super fine, huh?” Sisu said as a test.
“Yes ma’am,” Raya was practically frothing at the mouth, but snapped out of it when she fully thought about what Sisu had asked. “I-I MEAN NO! Of course she’s not! I mean sh-she’s okay looking, but I’ve seen WAY better than Namaari. Like, WAY.” Raya sat back in her chair with her arms crossed and lips pursed, still staring at Namaari helplessly.
“Oh yeah? Name ‘em,” Sisu interrogated, trying on Raya’s bamboo hat hat hat was nestled in the sand.
“No problem! There’s- um...uh...you know that one...guy..” Raya trails off as she stared at Namaari doing push ups. She shakes her head out of the trance.
“YOU CANT EVEN NAME ONE BYE-“ Sisu couldn’t help but laugh. Raya frowned with crossed arms and slumped.
“You know, I’ve seems that “one guy” tons of times...he’s not that bad looking if I’m honest.” Namaari is suddenly leaning on the right side of Raya’s chair, still doing bicep curls with the arm not on the chair.
“YOU- h-how much did you here..?” Raya felt like telling her off, but that wouldn’t do anything. When Raya was in private, she could think of all kinds of ways to tell Namaari off. But she can never apply that stuff when she sees her face to face.
“Not much...only the part where YOU couldn’t name anyone more attractive than ME.” Namaari smiled up at Raya from where she was at the bottom of the tall chair.
“Um, NO. That’s not what I was asked. I was asked to name someone BETTER than you, not attractive,” Raya climbed down from her chair and leaned against it, arching her back with both hands on her hips, looking up at the fang princess.
“Pfft- not what I heard but, puh-taytoe puh-tatoe right?” Namaari jeered. “You’d be a really good liar if your blushing didn’t always give you away Princess,” Namaari had a hand on the side of the chair, trapping Raya against it. Namaari caressed Raya’s hot face and used her index finger to raise her chin and smiled, “it’s cute though”. Namaari said with a smirk. That damn smirk.
Screw it, Raya thought. She grabbed namaari’s tank top with both hands and crashed her lips against hers. Namaari hummed with approval, one hand on Raya’s waist and the other in her hair. Sisu was on the side, jumping and silently squealing with happiness.
They kept this up for another 30 seconds or so. Raya was the first to break away from the kiss.
“I knew your lips were soft.” Namaari said all smiley as she backed away to return to her work out area. “Thanks for giving me a taste!” She shouted over her shoulder.
Raya was standing still with her lips pursed and her arms stiff to her side.
“Oh m-my spirits...I just did that.” Raya whispered aloud.
“UH- YEAH YOU DID!” Sisu hollered as she high fives the hand Raya was using just then to wave at Namaari nervously with a dorkish smile and giggle.
“But quit making that face. You’re starting to remind me of Marinette from MLB,” Sisu rolled her eyes and laughed.
“YESH NAMAARI LIKES ME TOOOOO!” Raya pumped her fists like a kid and yells a little too loud, causing the beach occupants near by to turn around, some even laugh. Raya’s knees turned in nervously.
“Can we please leave before I embarrass my self anymore?” Raya whines.
“Sure, lets get outta here lover girl, I’ll cover you for chief Benja.” Sisu grabs her arm.
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justjessame · 25 days ago
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Avery Emerson Clay: Use Your Words First, Then Use Your Fists...
Clay smirked up at me from his sprawled position on my bed and I rolled my eyes at my larger than life older brother. “Do you really think you’re dressed for a sparring session, Avery?” He was taking in the dress and heels, and a part of me wanted to show him just how ready I was, but he was trying to push my buttons as only a big brother could.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about, Junior.” His smirk dropped, he always hated being reminded that he was a sequel. “Let’s lay out your issues with my interest in Jake and Jake’s interest in me, so we don’t ruin Rose’s little party plans for the evening.”
He groaned and sat up, forcing me to hold back a joke about his age catching up to him. “He’s part of my team, Ave, that makes him-”
“A part of your team, Clay.” I shook my head at what he was trying to press into being logical. “Do you honestly think Jake and me playing hide the pickle is going to make him respect YOU less?” I snorted. “Did you pay attention when we came back from feeding my goats?” Seriously, was my brother slipping in his observation abilities? “He wanted the floor to eat him whole as soon as he saw you, if anything I think the morning after he touches me is gonna be magical for your power over him. He’ll probably be willing to bumrush any danger you point to, just to prove he’s still YOUR guy.” I shook my head and threw in another eye roll for good measure. “Jake is a soldier, Clay, YOUR soldier. The fact that he has a pulse and EXCELLENT eyesight with those glasses of his doesn’t change that.”
“You’re so damn sure of yourself, aren’t you?” He was smiling again, and I shrugged. “When did you get so confident?”
“I’ve always been confident, it was just hidden under piles of protective layers of my smothering family members.” I sighed. “I like Jake, Clay, he’s a nice guy.” Clay’s soft brown eyes, so like our dad’s that I felt like I was prepping for the same conversation when he arrived, met mine. “I can’t promise it’s love, but I won’t know if isn’t if we’re not allowed to get to know each other.”
Pushing off my bed, Clay stood up and rubbed one of his huge hands over his face. “I just don’t want Jensen to be distracted, Ave, not when we’re working to get our lives back on track. And a lovesick, or heartbroken-”
“I’m not planning on distracting him,” I wasn’t, I’d keep my schedule the same, which meant that Jake would be on his own schedule too, I was a fucking adult after all. “I work for a living, remember?”
“You work from home,” his eyebrow went up, and I had to work hard to keep from rolling my eyes again. “Even if you don’t want to be a distraction, you’re a distraction.”
“Do you want me to wear a burka and hide in my room until you all leave?” I mean for fuck’s sake, Jake had already seen and knew me, kind of past the point of arguing about distracting him, wasn’t it? “Clay, we’ve met, has whatever it is Jake does for your team suffered since we met?”
He stared down at me and we were at a stalemate, but his lack of response told me all I needed to know. Jake hadn’t faltered, he hadn’t dropped any balls, Clay was just being proactive and Alpha male commander. “I should go get ready for the celebration.” He kissed my temple on the way out of my room, reminding me that regardless of how irritated we might be with one another, he still loved his baby sister. Even if I wanted to slap the shit out of him.
Rose had outdone herself, again. Every event she chose to take on, she went above and beyond the last one she put on. Even if this was an intimate celebration, with only Clay’s team and the two of us, she’d managed to make a dinner that would make anyone envious followed by dessert and drinks with a feeling that we were welcoming my big brother home after a far too long time apart.
Red meat, because Franklin Clay, Junior was nothing if not a red meat kind of man, coupled with starches and a few lighter dishes for those of us who didn’t want to feel the heaviness of dinner for days after it, Rose made sure that the conversation around the table and later in the family room was kept as light as the breeze that was coming through the open patio doors. Or she was trying.
“Remember that time-” was a common question that Clay would bring up, usually an embarrassing story about me, doing something I’d rather forget having done at an age when the statute of limitations for reminders should be up, and I’d sigh and Rose would try to change the subject. Until I finally decided that two could play at that game.
“Do you remember visiting me during my first year in college?” I was sitting on the sofa while Clay was in the chair at the head of the room, with Aisha perched on his lap.
His smile grew, thinking I was going to tell a tale of my big brother being sweet and caring. “Yeah, it was around homecoming, right?”
My grin grew and I nodded. “Yep. I’d left you and my roommate alone while I ran out to grab some food, and when I came back you’d managed to push our beds together, you were screwing one another like animals on BOTH our beds-” I sighed, and took a long sip from my drink, plain soda since I wasn’t keen on alcohol. “I ended up sleeping on the couch in the common room.”
“Shit, I forgot about that,” he looked abashed, but I wasn’t nearly finished with the tale.
“Yeah, she ended up slashing my tires, pissing on my bedding, and Mom had to come to the school to make a formal complaint to get a private room for me, since the administration seemed to think it was a simple ‘girl fight’ thing.” I shrugged. “She seemed to think that you were planning on calling her, or that it was more than a one off.”
“She slashed your tires?” Pooch’s eyes were wide, but his lips were twitching so I had a feeling he’d heard about Clay’s AMAZING taste in women. “Wow, so it’s been going on for awhile.”
“A bit.” I answered, relaxing into the couch cushions. “I can’t count on one hand how many times I’ve walked in on big brother with one of his MANY conquests,” my eyes were on Clay, not his current lady friend. “Of course, the same could be said for walking in on Mom and Dad.” I cringed, wishing there was some way to erase that shit from my memory bank. “Didn’t you screw half of my debate team too?”
“Avery Emerson,” it was Rose and I knew I was in trouble. “Now is not the time for that type of discussion.”
“You’re right, Rosie.” I stood up, shaking off the evening. “I think now is the time for Netflix and chill. Dinner was amazing, and that cake.” I smiled at the woman who helped raise me. “You are a wonder.” I hugged her and started to tell everyone goodnight when Clay stopped me.
“Thought I was the old one, Ave.” I waited, thinking I knew where he was going and hoping I was right. “Didn’t you want to spar earlier?”
“That sounds suspiciously like a challenge, Junior.” I squinted and watched him studying my outfit again. I knew he was taking note of every article he thought could be used to his advantage, and I hoped he understood that Daddy had been making sure that Mom and I knew how to use the same shit that Clay or other people might see as a disadvantage as an edge. “Come on, let’s get this over with so I can go relax.” I moved outside, stretching as I went, knowing that he’d count my turning my back to my opponent as a strike against me. Sure enough, I felt the warmth of him as a warning and smirked, thinking he fell right into my trap.
“Rule number one,” he started, but my hand was already wrapping around his as it reached for my shoulder, and then the fight was on.
Teaching my big brother that falling into the false security and belief in your own supremacy simply because you’re bigger and have the professional training of Rambo is a terrible idea was well worth the price of admission and the bruises I earned. Seeing him flat on his ass was balm for my wounded pride, but it was short lived.
“Here,” I held out my hand, waiting for him to swallow his own pride and take it. “Come on, Clay, take it so we can get inside and you can go lick your wounds, or have them licked, and I can take another shower and watch mindless television until I pass out.”
He grabbed my hand, and like a stooge I started to yank him up, only to have him pull and have me go asshole over teakettle. “Never let your guard down, Avery.” I was shaking my head as he got to his feet and pulled me upright. “You’re not bad, Dad’s done a good job of making sure you won’t get your ass handed to you by a normal mugger.” I glared up at him and wanted nothing more than to kick him right in his overly testosterone balls when my cell rang with Dad’s ringtone.
“Hey, Dad,” I answered, putting him on speakerphone. I knew he’d been watching, since the house was rigged with his little watchbots. “How’s Mom?”
“We’re fine, sweetie.” He answered, and I waited, knowing he was holding back laughter. “I see that you had a workout. Maybe you should put that package out of sight out of mind for a bit?” Yeah, good idea, before my parents end up not having any grandkids that carry the Clay surname. He was having issues holding back his chuckles and I wanted to throw my phone in the pool. “Remember what that weirdo who wants you to tie your body into weird knots said, try a downward cow pose or something and breathe, princess.” Fuck you, Daddy, I thought, wondering how many volts Clay could take before he would be sterile.
“Yeah, I’ll breathe through my nose, Dad.” I rolled my eyes, and glared up at a grinning Clay. “Any other prize platitudes you feel like instilling?”
“Just wanted to tell you we’re heading back in a few days.” Great, then the gang really would be all here. “We’ll sit down and deal with the package then.” My turn to grin, my eyes locked on Clay’s and I was happy to see him glaring now. “Mom sends her love, have a good night.”
“Night, Daddy, love you.” I was much happier when I hung up the phone than when I answered it, but Clay was the opposite end of that spectrum. Oh how the mighty do fall, I thought.
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wanderlacey2 · 25 days ago
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Jealousy (Junkrat X D.VA One-Shot)
It was a dreary day at the Overwatch base with the calmness of everybody relaxing in their favorite spots entertaining themselves, talking to one another, the sound of the storm outside as the harsh rain hit against the metal building and the thunder booming in the distance.
But it wasn't exactly a calming day with the recent couple of two and a half months, Jamison and Hana, otherwise known as Junkrat and D.VA.
Nobody wanted to be stuck in between that fight they were having as they could hear the ruckus a few doors down from the large living room.
Needless to say, it was pretty loud for the distance.
"Um, you think we should check it out, be sure they're-" Lucio was suggesting until Jack, the fatherly figure of the group, held up his hand not bothering to look up from the newspaper he was so engrossed in, as he shook his head.
"They'll be fine, it won't be too long till they calm down."
Angela, the motherly figure of the group, bringing over a fresh steaming cup of coffee for the soldier looked up towards the direction the loud commotion was coming from.
"All couples have their quarrels, just give them some time." Just then out of surprise the quarreling paused, and a loud slam of a door was heard as everyone waited to see who came out.
With the footsteps coming down the hall, everybody knew who it was with the sound of, stomp, clack, stomp, clack, stomp, clack.
"Jamison?" Angela tried stopping the junker, but with no luck, just received a loud slam to the exit of the base.
Everyone's shoulders clenched from all the noise; today would have been the perfect break day for everybody if it wasn't for the couple's bickering.
All the Overwatch team thought the relationship wouldn't last long, for Hana's celebrity reputation, and Jamison's criminal record as well as his dangerous nature. How could two polar opposites be so attracted to one another?
Sombra stood up from her computer, stretching out the kinks in her muscles as she walked towards the hallway.
"I'mma see if the little brats alright." She chuckled under her breath; everyone knew that Sombra and Hana had a weird sisterly relationship, one minute they'll be talking like they were great friends and even hanging out in public every now and then, but other moments they'd be at each other's throats.
"You really think that's a good idea with how the two of you are?" Sombra turned around eyeing the DJ, "Maybe another one of us should go." Although Lucio meant well, Sombra took offense to his suggestion, making it sound like she was gonna be a jerk to Hana in such a vulnerable state!
Well he's gotta point, she knew she could be a smart ass and get under Hana's skin, but at this point in time she knew what Hana needed and was going to be there for her any way she needed to be.
"Yeah, no, y'all can have all of your chances next time." With that Sombra turned on her heel and went down the hallway of doors, stopping in front of the door that had a tire mark going all the way from one side to another and a evil bunny face in the middle of it. Everybody had the option to decorate their door if they wanted to, but only few decided to do so, just as long as it wasn't permanent.
And of course Junkrat chose a hard substance to scrub off if something ever happened.
After a few seconds of waiting to see if she could hear anything behind the door, Sombra knocked a couple times before being surprised by the door swinging open immediately, as Hana was holding an empty glass bottle over her head ready to throw it.
Sombra was lucky enough to duck right on time as the glass shattered against the wall behind her, the shards falling to the floor shattering even more by the impact.
"Wow chica! You really planning Fawke's death right now aren't ya." She chuckled, smoothing out the wrinkles of her leggings.
"What do you want Sombra?" Hana asked walking back in the darkness of her room; Sombra felt eyes staring down at her, as she looked back towards the living room and saw everyone who was in there was watching with wide eyes, surprised at what they just witnessed.
Sombra rolled her eyes before stepping in the room and closing the door behind her as she turned on the light.
Now if anyone knew these two love birds, they knew the only thing those two had in common was that they didn't know the meaning of a clean room, clean wasn't even in their vocabulary for peat's sake!
"Okay chica," Hana looked up as she was pouting on the bed, hugging her stuffed bunny to her chest like a five-year-old would do, "What happened?" Sombra smirked waiting for Hana to rant about everything that just happened between her and her boyfriend.
"Nothing happened." She turned her head away towards the window as Sombra huffed out a laugh.
"Sure didn't sound like it was nothing." Hana looked back at her and then Sombra could see that Hana was trying her best to hold back her tears.
"Oh no, Girly don't, I'm not used to this mushy stuff!" Sombra regretted even coming in that room now, as Hana finally let out the water works and threw herself at Sombra taking her by surprise.
"Hey, it's alright," Sombra was trying to find the right words as Hana had a death grip around her as she was crying into Sombra's favorite hoodie.
At any other time Sombra would have pushed Hana off without hesitation, but decided not to, she wanted to prove to everyone that she could be caring sometimes, not all the time, but sometimes. Plus she hated seeing Hana like this and wanted to comfort her the best to her ability, because she knew Hana would do the same for her if the roles were reversed.
"You can talk to me, I won't tell the others if that's what you're worried about." Hana backed away and leaned on her collection of pillows and plushies again,
"No, I'm sure they got the full scoop, since everyone heard and all." Hana threw up her hands as if there was no point, and to be honest Hana wasn't wrong.
"Yeah that's true." Sombra nodded as a pillow was directly thrown at her face,
"Hey!" Sombra chucked the pillow back with twice the force, "Perra"
Hana had a small smile on her face then, as she was wiping the fresh hot tears away from her eyes.
"Jamie and I got in a ridiculous fight,"
"Yeah, no kidding."
"The last match we were on yesterday he was on the red team and I was on the blue team,"
"I was there, I know."
"Basically since we were on opposite teams, obviously I had to protect my own team!"
"Duh."
"So anyways there was a point in time where Lucio was in one of Jamie's traps, so I used my 'Defense Matrix' blocking out his explosives, and when Lucio was free I used that opportunity to kick Junkrat off the map."
"And so he's pissed about you knocking him off the map." Sombra nodded as Hana then stood up from her spot on the bed,
"That's just it, you would think that would be all he's upset about, but nooooo!" Sombra was trying to think what else about that situation could get the junker upset.
"Since I helped Lucio, in his mind he thinks I saved him because I have a crush on him and want to date Lucio instead of him." Sombra then looked dumbfounded at the assumption.
"Right!?" Hana called out as she threw the stuffed bunny against her pillows,
"Well obviously you don't, right?" Sombra stood up as she walked over and looked out the window, as the rain seemed to get harder with time.
"Oh no I'm absolutely in love with Lucio," Hana said hands held together against the side of her cheek, "of course I don't love him like that! I look at him like a brother!"
"So you told Fawkes all of this right?" Hana threw herself on the bed,
"Of course I did, but he won't believe me." The tears seemed to well up within her eyes all over again, "He thinks I'm going behind his back."
"Well give him some time, I'm sure he'll realize soon enough that you're not cheating on him." Sombra rubbed Hana's long brunette hair as her face was nuzzled against Fawke's dirt covered pillow, breathing in the burnt smell of fabric.
"That is so not sanitary, chica." Sombra was disgusted with the smell already, she couldn't see how Hana could even bare with the scent being in the room all the time!
"I love him so much." Hana's tears fluttered down her cheeks,
"Don't be crying on me again." Immediately Sombra backing up as she was waiting for the sudden pounce.
Hana stifled a laugh a bit until the door swung open revealing a very wet and very muddy Junkrat, leaving Sombra in disgust at the smell radiating off him. The scent was mixing in with the smell of the bedroom making it twice as bad.
"I think now is my time to go." Sombra said as she was about to slide out the door, holding her breath in the process, not wanting to smell this scent any longer, until Hana called out to her as she looked up from that horrid pillow.
"Thanks, Sombra." Sombra smirked at this, the both of them never said thanks or sorry they were just never like that, but hearing it for the first time gave Sombra a good feeling of accomplishment. Plus something to gloat about to everyone that she could be helpful when it came to some people's feelings.
Not all the time though.
"Yeah yeah." And with that Sombra went down the hallway to let everyone know that her accomplishment of being sisterly to Hana was complete.
Now they were just expecting the brawl to start all over again, so they just sat and waited for it to start back up.
Jamison Fawkes walked in the room, seeing Hana curled up on the bed waiting for anything to happen.
Hana's nerves were at a stiff point, expecting Jamie to explode with anger as he did earlier, but nothing ever came. He just stood there staring at the floor as if he was trying to find the right words to say.
So the both of them stood in silence for a minute waiting for one or the other to say something.
"Hana......." She looked into her boyfriend's golden eyes waiting for whatever he was going to say, but she knew when he uses her real name, he's upset, so he was still frustrated with her, "I love ya, but," He rubbed the back of his neck, he was never good at finding the right words for something and would be funny about it, but this time there was no goofiness to his personality, which was a very rare trait to see. Even for Hana.
"I think we should, take a break, at least-" He scratched at his hair which was no longer on fire as the rain made his hair stick to the sides of his face, "For a while at least." he finally breathed out slapping his arms to his sides giving up on beating around the bush.
Hana's breath was caught in her throat, she didn't want them to have a break, she wanted him to be with her for however long their life span aloud.
"Junkie......" Hana could feel the burn behind her eyes as the tears threatened to stream down her cheeks again, everything was a blur for the water in her eyes was building up.
"Let's say a month, and we'll see how everything goes, alright?" He grabbed a duffel bag from the closet, until Hana got up rushing over to the man she loved, ripping the bag from his hands and throwing it back in the closet.
Then Forcefully turned him around and slammed her lips against his pushing him against the wall in the process.
Her smooth glossed lips crushing his rough chapped ones.
For the almost three months they've been dating, and moving in only a month ago and sleeping together, which took some time as he would sleep in the bean bag chair for the first few nights, but with some persuasion Hana was able to convince him it was okay for them to share a bed. But the thing was, this was only the second time they've kissed one another.
Jamison was always gentle when it came to Hana and never wanted to rush her into things she didn't want to do, so he never knew how to exactly kiss her whenever he wanted to, and if she actually liked it.
But did he want to kiss her more? Of course he did, he was just always scared of her reaction to such an affectionate action. The first time it happened, it wasn't even on the lips it was just on her cheek.
They were on the same team and he was low on health, and in a vulnerable state, as Hana was out of her mech, she took action and saved him. The kiss surprised her none the less as she was leading him back towards Mercy.
But just by that reaction, ever since then he didn't know how to even bother to try it again.
Jamison took a moment to realize what was happening before succumbing into the kiss, wrapping his arms around her small frame.
While she had to stand on her tip toes to reach him, for his height was much taller than her own.
The kiss lasted for as long as both of their breaths could allow.
Hana remembered the day Jamison's lips came in contact with her cheek, ever since then she wanted to kiss him, but since that action he never even tried kissing her again, not even on the cheek.
Obviously she liked it, but he must not have, but now she could tell whatever they felt about that kiss before was long gone.
"I promise you," Hana breathed out, mouth still close to his as their foreheads were touching and her fingers intertwining with the locks of hair on the back of his head, "I never, ever went behind your back and never will."
Jamison took a minute to really process everything, from the kiss, to the relaxing massage behind his head, to what she was saying now, he heard her before, but didn't really listen to be honest.
But the kiss proved to him that she did actually care for their relationship, he just sometimes felt it was only one sided, and that kiss changed his perspective about their relationship.
"I believe you." Jamison breathed out as he finally saw the girl he has loved for a while now, have a wide spread smile along her face.
"Now," Jamie did his famous insane chuckle as he hoisted Hana up in his arms, "how about we have a bit of fun tonight." he said holding up a bomb.
Hana wrapped her arms around his neck.
"I would love to."
Thus that night the dynamic lovers went around the base of Overwatch, taking turns throwing bombs at every one as they had no mercy on anybody as everyone was minding their own business, before explosives rolled towards them, immediately making them scatter.
But sad to say the two had to clean up the mess right after all the havoc they just caused.
"Hey Jamie," Jamison looked up as he was mopping the last bit of ash on the floor, "I love you."
Before when Jamison admitted to Hana that he loved her, that was actually the first time he said those words to her, so now it was her turn.
Jamie dropped the broom on the ground as he walked over to her, wrapped his arm around her back bringing her to his chest and kissed her softly, unlike before.
"I love ya too, Shelia."
"No making out in the living room." Jack said sitting in the same chair he has been, even during the bomb attack, still reading that paper of his as he was still covered in soot.
The two laughed a bit as they were still holding each other.
"Don't make me get up from this chair." The tone to Jack's voice was much more serious then, making the two jump away from each other's embrace before Jack could get up and come after them.
Nobody ever wanted that, it has been seen and done before, traumatized them enough to never try his patience again.
"Maybe later." Hana mouthed to Jamie as she winked at him, as the two got back to work to cleaning the whole living room and kitchen.
The End
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just gonna answer these cus im a little bored and procrastinating on my job
65 Questions You Aren't Used To
1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you? - no, we are all very real
2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you? - maybe a two. things do exist in the dark.
3. The person you would never want to meet? - trump... ill probably get sent to jail if you put me within reach of that man
4. What is your favorite word? - “as” its a beautiful structure for metaphors
5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be? - maybe ash. not very unique, not very standoffish, but one of strongest and most reliable forms of wood
6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought? - my hair got fucked up while i slept it was a little surprising
7. What shirt are you wearing? - red pullover
8. What do you label yourself as? - a demon
9. Bright room or dark room? - dark
10. What were you doing at midnight last night? - watching inkmaster
11. Favorite age you’ve been so far? - i dont have one
12. Who told you they loved you last? - my mom
13. Your worst enemy? - societal expectation
14. What is your current desktop picture? - hyyh bts
15. Do you like someone? - no
16. The last song you listened to? - butter
17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up? - nobody? killing people isnt all that
18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face? - currently? that one mf in texas yall know who
19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do? - um? what
20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional) - my eyes. ive been told theyre bottomless.
21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do? - id be hot. not really too interested in leading a life that isnt my own. id probably look in the mirror a little bit and then just about my day?
22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it? - im sort of a all-kill when it comes to art. i can hold my own in painting, drawing, music production, singing, writing, directing and envisioning. so i guess artistic prowess? idk im a biologist so its not common in my field.
23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of? -im not afraid of much.
24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal. -cubano
25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it? - im depositing it in the bank
26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go? -id love to say some place in asia but logically since i only speak spanish and english ill be going puerto rico
27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be? -michelob ultra. ik ik beer is gross blah blah idc i consume beer much faster than other alcohol and its refreshing so ill go with that
28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? - mandatory therapy
29. What is your favorite expletive? - cunt (im not british)
30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno? - laptop
31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? - petition to let me erase more than one. its all or none erased, because all my experiences defined me. id need all of them or i wouldnt be me. if were erasing, get rid of it all.
32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! -this is not a question
33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back? - i see ghosts and i dont want them back. death happens when its necessary. dont cheat that. 
34. What was your last dream about? - i dont remember but i know it happened
35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]? - i am a good
36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? - yeah i broke my wrist once
37. Have you ever built a snowman? - no
38. What is the color of your socks? - not wearing ones rn but usually black
39. What type of music do you like? - anything but misogynist country
40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? - sunset
41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? - cookies and cream
42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer) - real madrid
43. Do you have any scars? - many
44. What do you want to be when you graduate? - research scientist
45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? - less migraines
46. Are you reliable? - yes
47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? - you processed all that trauma yet?
48. Do you hold grudges? - depends on the offense
49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create? - i wouldnt
50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had? - someone asked me if id let them snort xanax out of my asshole
51. Are you a good liar? - great, actually
52. How long could you go without talking? - havent tested this but a long time
53. What has been you worst haircut/style? - bangs, not because i looked bad but because curly hair and bangs dont always mix
54. Have you ever baked your own cake? - all the time
55. Can you do any accents other than your own? - im decent at a british one
56. What do you like on your toast? - i dont eat toast
57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of? - a succulent
58. What would be you dream car? - mercedez benz 1982 300D in yellow
59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain. - i sing and dance in the shower
60. Do you believe in aliens? -youd be dumb not to
61. Do you often read your horoscope? - not really
62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet? - dont have one
63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons? - i dont exactly think either are cool. 
64. What do you think about babies? - hatred.
65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of. - ?
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“The Nanny” Chapter 37: Celebrate Love
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Robin came home two days after being moved from the ICU. After an argument, Regina agreed to stay home and rest for the twins' sake while Will and Robin's parents went to get him from the hospital. Regina was antsy from the moment they left until they returned, afraid something would happen and Robin wouldn't come home at all. She told herself that she was just making herself worry about worst-case scenarios that would never happen, which was not good for the Beans.
But she was very relieved when Will and John helped him into the living room. She was unable to rise from the couch to greet him but it didn't matter as they sat him down next to her. Robin wrapped his arm around her, holding her close as he kissed her forehead. "It's good to be home," he murmured.
"It's so good to have you home," she replied, taking a deep inhale. While there was the lingering anti-septic smell of the hospital, she could still detect his usual woodsy scent and that was comforting to her. It reassured her that he was really there.
Roland entered the room, holding his grandmother's hand. Though his eyes lit up, he hesitated to join them on the couch. "Are you okay, Papa?" he asked.
"I am," Robin assured him. "But you know what will help me feel even better? A hug from my boy."
Smiling, Roland hurried onto the couch and climbed on it, hugging his father. "I'm glad you're home."
"I'm glad I'm home too," Robin said, holding his son tight. He cupped the back of his head, closing his eyes as he gently rocked with Roland.
It brought tears to Regina's eyes and she leaned closer to them, resting her head on his shoulder. They were all together again and that made her very happy.
"Now that you're home, can we put up the Christmas tree?" Roland asked, his voice slightly muffled.
Everyone chuckled and Robin kissed his forehead again. "How about we put it up tomorrow? I'm still tired from the hospital but I think a good night's sleep will definitely help," he said.
"Okay, Papa," Roland said, sliding down until he was sitting next to his father. He leaned against him, happy.
Regina took Robin's other hand and placed it on her stomach so he could feel the twins' kicking. "I think they want to say they are glad you are home too," she said.
He smiled, nodding. "I think so too. And I'm really glad I'm home too. I can't wait to sleep in our bed, next to you in absolute darkness and silence."
"Are you sure about sleeping with me? I can always move to another bedroom," she replied, worried about hurting him or doing something to set back his healing accidentally. With the twins almost at term, they were getting short on space and constantly moving, which meant she was constantly trying to find a comfortable position. There was also the matter that one or both were sitting on her bladder, so she was often going to the bathroom now. She worried he wouldn't be able to get any sleep due to her constantly moving the bed. It was bad enough she couldn't get much sleep.
She couldn't wait to give birth.
"Yes," he said, his voice strong and sure. "I just spent about three nights away from you. I'm not going to spend any more."
"I don't want to hurt you or set your recovery back," she told him, taking his hand.
He shook his head. "You won't. Trust me."
"Alright," she said. "But if tonight you don't get a good sleep, promise to tell me in the morning so we can figure it out."
"Okay," he replied reluctantly. But it pleased her and she kissed his cheek, thanking him in a soft tone. She rested her head on his shoulder and he held her closer as their family gathered around them. Chatter filled the room but she closed her eyes, just taking in Robin's presence.
It was really good to have him home.
***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** ***** *****
Robin slept like a log that first night home. While the rational side of him told it was because of the medications Whale and the pain management team sent him home with, his romantic side believed it was because Regina had been beside him.
He rolled onto his uninjured side and watched as she slept, a hand on her stomach. Robin was glad none of them had been hurt and that they were all still there. Soon, the twins would arrive and he couldn't wait to welcome them into the world – hopefully with Nat Cole in prison where he belonged.
A soft sigh brought his attention back to Regina and he smiled as she woke up, rubbing her stomach. "I don't know which one is kicking me but I wish they would stop," she moaned.
"Do you want me to ground them?" he asked. "I'm not sure how effective it would be though."
She chuckled before shaking her head. "Thanks for offering. Anyway, how did you sleep?"
"Very well," he told her. "And no, I'm not lying. I got a great night of sleep with you."
"I did sleep better knowing you were right beside me," she admitted, moving closer to him.
He kissed her forehead. "Was it restful?"
She shrugged. "As restful as the Beans allow me these days."
"I know Marian didn't get much sleep in the couple weeks before Roland was born," he said, recalling how his wife tossed and turned in bed and how exhausted she looked throughout the day.
"You mean this is going to get worse?" she asked with a groan, burying her face into the pillow.
He sighed, trying to reach over to rub her back but grunting when a dull pain filled his side. She sat up, frowning. "What's wrong?"
"Just sore," he told her. "I'll be fine."
But she pushed back the blankets and started to climb out of bed. "I'll go check your medicine regime."
He sat up and reached for her, trying not to wince when another twinge of pain emanated from his side. "No, no. I'm fine. I just want to cuddle with you. That's all the medicine I need."
She paused, leaning against the bed as he looked right in his eyes. "And if I say that after the twins are born when it's clear I'm in pain, what will you say and do then?"
Robin knew she had him there. He would do anything to make sure she was comfortable and not in pain, including making sure she followed any instructions the doctor gave her – and if it meant she needed medicine, he would see that she took it. And so she was going to do the same for him. They were two stubborn fools in love and in a battle of their wills, one was going to have to concede.
And right now, it was him.
"Alright," he said, relaxing against the bed again. "You can go get the medicines."
"Thank you," she told him softly. She straightened up and waddled into the bathroom, turning on the light. He then heard the rattling of pill bottles as she gathered up what he needed to take.
Robin sat up more as she left the bathroom, carrying some pills in the palm of one hand and a cup of water in the other. She gave him the pills and he took them, washing them down with the water. He set the cup down, smiling. "There. Now can we cuddle?"
She rolled her eyes but climbed back into bed, situating herself carefully against him. They wrapped their arms around each other and she rested her head against his shoulder. "I'm so glad you're home."
"Me too," he replied, rubbing her arm as he felt one of the twins kick her. "And I have no desire to leave this place until the New Year. Maybe even longer."
"What about Sherwood? I mean, I don't expect you to work as you recover from getting shot but you are the CEO," she pointed out.
"Everything is handled," he assured. "We have contingency plans. Mulan will assume control and Alan will help her."
Robin knew her question came from curiosity about his business and their operations but the shooting had made him realize there was so much they still needed to discuss now that they were building a family and a future together. He and John had come up with provisions for many scenarios and everything had gone well with the shooting but as he laid in the hospital bed, he realized that he now had to include Regina in them. They needed to come with their own emergency plans and to know each other's wishes in case the worst should happen.
"I think we need to talk, though," he said, looking down at her.
She frowned, lifting her head. "What about?"
"Emergency measures," he replied.
"You just got out of the hospital," she told him, some fear in her eyes. "Can we wait a couple weeks to talk about it? When the fear of losing you really fades again?"
For a moment, he considered agreeing to table it until later. But then he worried that they would then get caught up in something else – such as the twins arriving – and then by the time they needed to talk about it, it would be too late. So he shook his head. "I'm sorry, sweetheart, but I think we need to talk about it now."
Continue reading on AO3 or Wattpad
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hopekiedokie · 27 days ago
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Mall is Life | Episode 2 (1/2) : The Birthday Period
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Summary: Your dad thinks it’s best for you to pay off the credit card that you just maxed out. Meaning, it’s time for you to finally get your very first job…at the mall. As a true blue spoiled daughter from a very rich family, what could possibly happen? Form a labour union and overthrow the oppressive government with 7 other underpaid and overworked guys??? Or maybe just form a bond with them and have the best time of your life?
Pairing: bts x reader
Genre: mall!au, lowkey a sitcom, fluff, sprinkle of angst, and a whole lot of pure crack
Word count: 8.5k+
Episode summary: Seokjin’s slow descent into a disaster of a birthday + The boys get educated with period talks
Notes: Ok 4 things: 1.) The entire ep 2 reached tumblr's 1000 block limit which is apparently a thing so I had to split it in half. 2.) OMG I FREAKING MANIFESTED THE BTS X MCDONALDS COLLAB!! Mall is Life Taehyung would be horrified lol. 3.) Stream Butter!!!! And 4.) If you want to be added to the taglist, just let me know! Anyways, stay safe, wash your hands, drink your vitamins, and get vaccinated if you can!! (ノ^▽^)ノ~♡
Posted on: 23rd of May, 2021
— • masterlist | previous | Episode 2 | next • —
Guess what?
Knock knock! Surprise bitch, it’s that time of the month!
💓💞💖✨𝑌𝑂𝑈𝑅 𝑃𝐸𝑅𝐼𝑂𝐷 𝐼𝑆 𝐶𝑂𝑀𝐼𝑁𝐺❣️✨💗❤️
┻━┻ ︵ヽ(`Д´)ノ︵ ┻━┻
You know the nice and sweet y/n?
Yeaaaah, she leaves for a holiday.
...or gets kidnapped.
Either way, this is the time where Hurricane Y/n shows up to wreak havoc.
Everything you know about yourself basically gets thrown out the window.
Well, that and all sense of control disappears.
Essentially, you’re a completely different person
AND it’s not your fault!
I mean, come on
Mood swings: CHECK
Cramps: CHECK
Headaches: CHECK
Food cravings: CHECK
You feel disgusting: ChECk
Continuous bleeding: ℂℍ𝔼ℂ𝕂
In conclusion: someone up there has a serious vendetta against anyone who has a vajayjay.
You are sure about this and for the good of all womankind, you are willing to take one for the team and shoot or stab them until they’re the one bleeding profusely.
Maybe even both, who knows?
Oh, and that also goes to anyone who dares to annoy you.
Ah yes.
What a time to be a friend of yours.
(That was sarcasm, kids)
Especially now because it’s the birthday of a certain “𝓚𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓜𝓪𝓵𝓵”™
You arrive at the food court to the sight of Jimin and Hoseok sandwiching a surprisingly emotionless Seokjin.
The colourful card on top of the table doesn’t go unnoticed by you.
Must be handmade.
The drawing of rainbows just screams Jimin while the smiley faces scream Hoseok.
Meanwhile, Seokjin is looking uncharacteristically cold.
“Uh, can’t he show some appreciation for his friends even just a little?? Has he been hanging out too much lately with a certain Min Yoongi?” You think to yourself as you stomp strut towards them.
Seokjin manages to peel himself off the two, much to their dismay.
“Okay, that’s enough! Sheesh, y’all know I hate birthdays so can we please just get on with our day normally?!” Seokjin tells them off rather harshly.
You see the two other boys discreetly share a disheartened look and that rEALLY ticks you off.
The thing is
If this were Yoongi or Taehyung, heck even Namjoon, you wouldn’t mind that much. They’re like, made of steel or something like that.
But this is Jimin and Hoseok and damn it no one gets away from throwing an attitude at these sunshine of a pair.
“Hey!” You catch their attention.
“I understand everyone’s entitled to be a jerk every once in a while. I don’t know what your problem is but today’s not your day to be one, buddy. So I suggest that you leave these two alone and go take a hike or something!”
Hold up
What is this?
You? Being mean? And scary?
The three boys stare at your red and fuming face in shock.
“Has Yoongi finally rubbed on you?” The guys collectively think to themselves.
“Well?” You sputter directly at Seokjin but he doesn’t say anything. “Are you at least gonna apologise?”
To say that he is confused by you is an understatement.
Are you doing some kind of opposite day?
Seokjin checks beside him.
Then he looks behind him just to be sure.
Huh, there’s no one around…
So you are talking to him.
Your intense head-chopping gaze makes him involuntarily gulp (and maybe piss his pants a bit bUT you didn’t hear that from me).
But like,
Why is he lowkey turned on by this???
“Are you gonna say something or am I gonna have to make you?!”
“Aish, alright sweetheart. Calm down. You’re killing me!” Seokjin tries to lighten you up and steer away his slight fear.
His attempts at humour doesn’t work though because you grab his arm and yank it forcefully so you can be at eye level with each other.
“Is that what you want? Get yourself killed?? Cause I can arrange that!”
Woah, woah, WOAH
Someone needs to chill aSAP
With your highly rich background, Seokjin knows that you can DEFINITELY get him killed.
He doesn’t want to find out how many hitmen your daddy knows especially if their target is him!
So he immediately apologises to the two wide eyed boys who've been watching everything in terror from the side.
“Okay, okay! You’re right! I was being a jerk to them and I’m genuinely sorry.”
That’s enough for you to at least release your vice grip on him.
Seokjin takes one look at his arm and he squawks at the sight of your handprint.
“Y/n…” Jimin reaches for your shoulder but you flinch away.
Eww...Human contact…
He immediately takes his arm away from you and raises them as if he’s been caught doing something bad.
Okaaaaaay, no touching. Noted!
“Uh, listen.” Jimin continues, brushing you off. “It’s okay! We understand that birthdays just don't do it for Seokjin hyung."
You gasp audibly at that.
Waaaaaaaat?
How could anyone say that about birthdays??
"So you don't like celebrating birthdays?"
Seokjin doesn't understand why you're acting so aggressive and he's not sure how to go about it.
You’re usually as harmful as a butterfly.
He looks to the other guys for some help but they obviously don't want to deal with whatever it is that is happening with you.
They care about their lives too much.
They said "Every man for himself, sucker!"
In short, Seokjin's on his own here.
"......Uhhhhhh…..No…...Not really…"
"Do you know what your mother went through just to pop you out of her hoo-ha?? The pain and suffering just to make sure you live?? Do you not understand that?!"
Seokjin jumps back at how loud your voice is and ends up linking arms with the other boys for some kind of protection.
"Actually, you know what? I'm not at all surprised that you don't hold importance to your own birth! You, men, are always selfish, never thinking about us, women. To think that we go through so much and y'all are just chillin, not even trying to check your own privilege. You have it soooo easy and yet you complain so much and brush everything to the side without even giving an ounce of appreciation for what we've done. Your mother could have very well died when she was pregnant OR while giving birth to you. Now, you're telling me that you don't see the point in celebrating it?? The actual audacity! You should be ashamed!"
You know how Seokjin thinks he's a little turned on by your shift in personality?
Yeah, let's forget that! ight now, all he wants to do is to run away and apologise to his mother.
He now sees that he hasn’t been the most grateful son all these years.
Just like that, a highly amused Yoongi enters the scene.
"Wow. What a speech."
He never thought he'd say this but damn you deserve some slow claps.
He did not think at all that you had it in you to snap like that!
But then again, he does understand why Seokjin isn’t too keen on birthdays so Yoongi can’t say that he sides with you.
Unfortunately.
* long and heavy sigh *
Don’t worry, the day he teams up with you will come eventually.
(maybe)
"As much as I enjoy seeing you get your rage on, I think you should calm down and listen to what Seokjin hyung has to say." He says casually, in true Yoongi fashion.
Oh, what could he possibly have to say to you??
You don't have the time nor energy to deal with selfish men like him.
But even on your period, you're not one to cross Yoongi.
I guess not entirely everything changes and gets thrown out the window.
You point your attention to Seokjin who is now hiding behind Hoseok and Jimin who are equally just as frightened as he is.
"Well, what is it?"
The two scaredy cats hastily grab Seokjin (an equally scaredy cat) to push him nearer to you.
No way are they gonna stand in between Seokjin and.....whatever’s up with you.
No, sir!
Still slightly terrified, Seokjin explains to you that the reason he doesn’t like birthdays (his own in particular) is because his family insists on throwing him a grand party with an oddly specific theme every year.
Now, you might think that that sounds pretty cool. What’s so wrong about that?
I’ll tell you what.
If you’re like Seokjin and 26 years have passed since you’ve been born, that means all the good themes have already been done. Not to mention, he has 5 brothers so that’s 8 themes per year for their entire family.
Last year, his theme was Books.
His dad even called it 𝑺𝒆𝒐𝒌𝒋𝒊𝒏’𝒔 “𝑶𝒏 𝑻𝒐 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑵𝒆𝒙𝒕 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒓” 𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒚. (Do we see where Seokjin takes after?)
It could definitely be a fun idea!
If you’re anyone but Seokjin, that is.
He doesn’t even remember the last time he’s read a book!
Which is really bad considering he now works at a bookshop.
Then the year before that, the theme was Green.
Yup, GREEN and just green.
Everything was green: clothes, decorations, gifts, foods
You name it!
Anything that has got something to do with green is in.
* the narrator shudders in disgust *
Even you, shudders in disgust.
That is in fact just sad.
If you’re the one in his situation, you’d also be dreading your birthday.
Actually, you’d be throwing a huge hissy fit about it!
So maybe, you do understand him now.
Before you voice that out to the rest of the guys though, you suddenly feel It™.
That little demon in your abdomen is here.
It's like your guts are abruptly being squeezed tightly to the size of a pea.
She’s been hit. I repeat, she’s been hit!
You bend slightly forward and close your eyes shut to let the pain subside.
Meanwhile, the guys are like (⚆ _ ⚆) (⚆ _ ⚆ ) ( ⚆ _ ⚆) (⚆ _ ⚆)
Uhhhh is she okay? What’s going on? Is she sick? Is it something she’s eaten?
Your groaning arse sends the four clueless men into a panicked zone.
“Y/n? You seem to be in serious pain."
“Do you need us to bring you somewhere? Or maybe do something?”
“Seriously, what’s wrong?”
“Dude, she’s not responding! Quick! Check if she’s still got a pulse!”
Jimin, once again, reaches out to check on you and that tIPS YOu oFF.
You hiss at him for the sudden contact.
For the second time, No touching.
The pain your feeling mixed with the high levels of stupid testosterone in the air is way too much for a girl to handle.
Ugh, you need some serious alone time.
And that quiet corner behind ICEA that Namjoon showed you one time pops in your head.
It's practically calling out to you.
Right now, that looks almost like paradise.
So amidst their onslaught of questions, you stand as straight as you possibly can while still clutching your abdomen. Then you leave just like that without even a single word.
Again,
The guys are like (⚆ _ ⚆) (⚆ _ ⚆ ) ( ⚆ _ ⚆) (⚆ _ ⚆)
Wtf was that all about?
Ugh! Women.
Seriously
The guys will never understand your kind.
You know what happens next?
Do they discuss what just happened?
Do they try to solve the mystery of what’s up with you?
Do they go after you?
Nah, man.
They did none of those.
Instead, they proceed like nothing ever happened.
They said "chile, anyways"
Ugh! Men.
“So….….What’s the theme this year?” Yoongi nonchalantly breaks the awful silence. As if you didn’t just show up and put on a weird spectacle minutes ago.
Seokjin releases a big dramatic sigh. “Aerobics. That’s the theme. And not just that, they mean 80’s aerobics.”
Big oof.
The three guys visibly cringe at that.
Well, Yoongi gags a bit.
No one needs to see Seokjin in a bright spandex leotard with big hair doused in hairspray.
……….Nor his dad blech!
His mum, though 😏🥳🤤
“That’s so not tight, man!”
“Wow, you agree with me? I thought you teach aerobics on the weekends?” Seokjin asks Hoseok incredulously.
Hoseok scoffs loudly, “It’s ZUMBA. Not aerobics.”
Fun fact: Hoseok is a Zumba instructor for senior citizens every other Sunday morning. Remember, ZUMBA and not aerobics!
“Zumba, aerobics, who cares?” Seokjin waves him off.
(Hoseok’s never felt more personally attacked)
“That doesn’t change the fact that my birthday theme this year still sucks! But is that a surprise? No! Of course not. If anything, I’m probably stuck with this faith until I’m in my seventies!”
“If you make it that long…” Yoongi, ever the bright and sunny man that he is, adds on.
And that’s when the lightbulb turns on inside Hoseok’s head.
A sort of “eureka” moment if you want to call it that.
Which only happens once in a blue moon tbh so either get excited or get scared.
“Hyung, what if we all get together and throw a party tonight? You know, just the eight of us and we do it our way?”
Hmmmmmmmmmm……
That’s actually a good idea!
“It’s already midday. We don’t have time to plan and prepare things.” Yoongi tries to whisper to Hoseok the way a ventriloquist does.
Well ok maybe it’s not a good idea!
But it’s already out in the open and Hoseok can’t take it back from Seokjin who is now getting overly excited.
Uh oh.
“You know what, Hoseok? That’s probably the best thing you’ve ever come up with!”
Uhm, maybe he can still take it back?
“Hyung, I uh don’t mean to lead you on but-“
“Like, wow! You’d do that for me? You guys are seriously the best! I would LOVE that!”
Seokjin stands and hugs each one of them tightly while blabbering about having the most amazing friends ever.
Yep, no taking that idea back now.
Houston, we have a problem.
I mean, just look at how happy he is now!
He’s a freaking menace but at the end of the day, we still love Seokjin.
So you know what Hoseok does?
He promises Seokjin that he’ll have a birthday he won’t forget!
To which Jimin gets slightly worried and Yoongi, very annoyed.
Ah shit, here we go again. Another day, another drama.
With that, a very bouncing and cheerful Seokjin kisses their cheeks before declaring that he’s heading back to work.
If you’re wondering, he currently works at Sheds and Virtuous Bookshop.
Why? Because of the yummy mummy wearing glasses that works there.
C'mon, you know him! Why else would he work at a place like that?
Before he leaves, Namjoon, Taehyung, and Jungkook show up.
On his way, Seokjin wordlessly kisses and hugs them all as well, leaving them either stunned or disgusted.
“What the heck was that about?” Taehyung mutters as he reaches for the makeup wipes he keeps in his purse to wipe any trace of Seokjin from his face.
(Taehyung would like it if no one stares at his cheap off brand purse that he unwillingly bought for himself. Unlike some people, he’s not stupid enough to bring his expensive babies to work…..He’s talking about you btw.)
“Yeah, shouldn’t he be miserable? It’s his birthday tomorrow!” Namjoon adds before realising just how sad that is.
“Ask him.” Yoongi points to an innocent looking Hoseok.
“Hey man! I only wanna cheer hyung up.”
Namjoon, Taehyung, and Jungkook all stare at Hoseok accusingly.
“What’d you do now?”
Hoseok is like ehe (´‿`)☞ ☜
“I might’ve promised that we’d throw him a party tonight…”
HE WHaT NOW?¿???
“Hoseok, we have no time for parties! You do realise that it’s the Christmas season, right? We’re all TOO busy.”
“I’m sorry my dudes! I only wanted to lift his spirits up. My brain didn’t think about the complications of throwing a party.”
They’re doomed.
How are they supposed to manage it in just a few hours WHILE working?
“Hey! Where’s my bestie?”
Taehyung is now realising your absence.
Priorities, amirite?
He turns to Namjoon. “Are you overworking her again?!”
Namjoon stops his chewing and looks at Taehyung with wide eyes and stuffed cheeks.
“Excuse me??” He tries to say with his mouth filled. “I’ve been nothing but nice and easy on her! I haven’t even seen her the entire morning!”
And it’s true.
He stopped overly stressing about your “work ethics” weeks ago. It’s not good for his health.
Besides, it’s not in his job description to oversee you anyways. He’ll leave that to Michael and to their actual manager.
“If she’s not working then where is she? Isn’t it her break time as well?”
“We’re not sure, but we think something’s up with her.” Jimin puts it lightly.
Yoongi snorts. “That’s a nice way to say that she’s absolutely insane in the brain today.”
“What do you mean? What’d she do now?” Namjoon’s senses are tingling and are telling him that he might need to scold you about something.
Since he’s met you, his “fatherly instincts” have been up to an eleven. When usually around the guys, it’s at a solid seven.
“Well, let’s see. She was really rude, she was being mean to Seokjin hyung by yelling at him, she avoided Jimin’s show of affections, and then she just stormed out without even saying anything!”
Taehyung raises a brow.
Huh
That sounds very familiar
There could only be one explanation….
Oh, he knows exactly what’s going on as he’s seen this play out plenty of times before.
He’s kind of surprised that it took you this long to keep Hurricane Y/n away from the other guys.
You’ve gone through a couple of periods of just completely avoiding the rest of them. His guess is that maybe you were still quite shy with the boys then.
“Hm that doesn’t sound like her. Maybe, I need to talk to her later..” Daddy Namjoon--I MEAN WhAT? I mEaN NaMjOoN! Ehem...Yeah, Namjoon...muses out loud.
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” Taehyung firmly advises him.
“And why’s that?”
“Because she’s on her period...or about to get it.”
The entire table falls into an awkward silence at the mention of….your "female" problems.
Well, that explains a lot but like…
Uhhhhh…...hEY! Look up there! Is that a butterfly flying freely inside the mall? Where did it come from? How inTeResTing! Say, let's talk about that and not other things involving you or your lady parts!
……..
What??
Do you think a bunch of grown arse (single) men would openly talk about your lady problems?
Lmfao
“Okay, then...You deal with Y/n!” Hoseok tells Taehyung.
Uh, no haha. Big phat NO.
“Serious hard pass on that one!”
“Why not? You’ve been ‘besties’ with her for so long. If anyone here knows what to do with her, it’d be you.”
Yoongi has a point.
“You see, when she’s on her period, anything I say and do pisses her off. Even just the mere sight of my face turns her into a hulk.”
Okay, Yoongi doesn’t have a point.
Btw Taehyung isn’t exaggerating this one bit.
One time back in high school, he said “hi” to you before first period and you literally cursed at him then told him to get lost.
Then one time during lunch, you told him that he looks like a hobo in front of hundreds of people.
HIM? THAT FACE? WITH HIS FASHION SENSE?
And not just a “hobo”, but an “unstylish” one!
The nerve of it all
“That sounds like a load of bull. What’s her reason?” Yoongi asks (Even though deep inside, out of all people, he should understand the strong urge to hurt someone for no apparent reason.)
Taehyung shrugs.
Beats him! How can anyone possibly want to punch him just by looking at his ethereal face?
Actually,,,,,,,,,,
Don’t answer him.
“Gentlemen, in science, that’s called hormones.” Namjoon enlightens everyone as he shoves another dumpling inside his mouth.
“Whatever!” Taehyung rolls his eyes. “My point is, you guys are on your own with Y/n unless you’re ready to attend my early funeral.”
Various noises of disapproval erupted around the table.
Yes, even Jimin.
But his’ is more of a cry of help from anyone up above.
How are they supposed to manage Seokjin’s birthday and your...uhm...thingy….??
“Well my dudes, Y/n aside, what are we going to do with Seokjin hyung’s celebration then?”
“I don’t know, Hoseok. What SHOULD we do? You’re the one who came up with this anyway.” Namjoon speaks up before he swats someone’s hand away from his dumplings.
He instantly regrets it as he sees that it was Jungkook.
Jungkook, wanting to get his way, uses his infamous large doe eyes on Namjoon.
Naturally, Namjoon feels compelled to give the younger lad the three remaining pieces.
What’s he supposed to do? Say no to Jungkook?
Lol.
“But bro, I only said that cause I feel bad for him! No one deserves a horrible birthday! Like what Y/n said a while ago, birthdays should be celebrated well for the sacrifices of our mothers!’
Taehyung and Namjoon are like “pardon?”
“She said what now?” A baffled Taehyung clarifies.
“Ignore it.” Yoongi pushes the subject away.
He’s not one to discuss childbirth.
Or anything that has got something to do with the female body…..
Unless…...…..
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
“You know, a party doesn’t need to be grand. Who says it can’t be a simple get together? I’m sure Seokjin hyung would still appreciate that.” Jimin suggests.
Huh.
That makes sense.
That makes A LOT of sense.
Why are they trying to make this as impressive as it can be?
It’s so simple!
“Oh my god, we are a bunch of idiots. Jiminie is right!”
And with that, they decide to just go for a simple dinner tonight at Taehyung’s place.
It’s not much but what can you do when you’re pressed for time?
Besides, anything is better than a hideous 80’s birthday bash.
So
Everyone is quickly divided into pairs with their own respective tasks. (Assigned by Taehyung and Yoongi aka the tag team from hell when Seokjin isn’t around)
Taehyung: venue
Yoongi and Hoseok: gift
Namjoon and Jimin: food
“Wait, what about me? Have I been forgotten?” Jungkook huffs from the side.
Alright, he admits.
He hasn’t been paying a single attention all this time (tbh are we really surprised about that?)
BUT THAT’S ONLY CAUSE HE’S HUNGRY OKAY??
He needs all the energy he can get.
You try to work at a retail shop that’s constantly swarming with fussy and finicky teenage girls. Let’s see if you don’t explode.
However, just because he’s quiet doesn’t mean he gets left out from whatever the guys are talking about!
“Oh don’t you worry, kid. We haven’t forgotten about you.” Yoongi coos at the younger lad then shares a knowing look with Taehyung.
Namjoon recognises that look.
It’s not a good thing. That, he can be sure of.
Oof good luck to Jungkook.
“Yeah, of course not!” Taehyung states further. “In fact, we have the most crucial work for you!”
Sniff.
You try not to cry as you walk around the mall.
Two minutes into your solitude at that vacant corner, you realise that you nEEd to tOUgHeN uP!
You’ve been experiencing period cramps for more than a decade now!
Are you seriously that much of a wimp?
Hell to the mothertrucking no.
Mama didn’t raise a weak arse bish.
So, you stood and strutted away to enjoy the rest of your break with your head held high.
That was until you witnessed a little girl cry because her dad refused to buy her this pretty pair of pink pumps
You know why?
Cause apparently her dad didn’t think she deserves them!
And quite frankly, she has too many shoes which is just insane tbh
Someone should tell this guy that there’s no such thing as too many shoes!
Men
Smh
This heavily reminded you of yourself and your situation with your own father.
Great! Now you’re getting emotional again!
Because of that, you resulted in doing the number one thing that makes you happy.
(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ Shopping ♥
But wait!
Hang on, what’s that?
You’re broke?
Oh, yeah.
Well then…..
Guess who’s even more depressed now?
(っ´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ)っ 💔 You 💔
Yaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!!!
So instead, you are now walking aimlessly doing a little bit of……ʷⁱⁿᵈᵒʷ ˢʰᵒᵖᵖⁱⁿᵍ
🤢
Which idiot thought that window shopping should be a thing??
It’s pure torture!
It just reminds you that you’re broke as shit.
And also, why call it “shopping” if there is nO SHOPPING INVOLVED????
People actually find this enjoyable?
You figure that it must be a “poor people” kind of thing.
Amidst your musings, you receive a series of texts from a person you least expect to message you.
Tumblr media
What is this??
Like, you don’t even remember the last time you two messaged each other.
Actually, you don’t think you guys have ever texted! You’re not even sure how and when you’ve acquired his number tbh
Well
You know how 15 minutes ago you said you needed to get away from everyone?
You change your mind now!
In fact, being surrounded by a lot of people and potentially getting babied by them suddenly sounds like the dream!
ᴱˢᵖᵉᶜⁱᵃˡˡʸ ⁱᶠ ᵗʰᵉʸ ᵃˡˡ ˡᵒᵒᵏ ᵃᵐᵃᶻⁱⁿᵍ ᵒᵒᶠ
Thus, you text Jungkook back with your current location which just so happens to be Perpetually21. Aka where he embarrassingly works at.
Besides, he dropped the 🥺 emoji! Who are you to ignore him with that?
As high as your standards are, you gotta admit though that you did go through a phase in your teenage life where you spent too much of your dad’s money on this particular shop.
Something about it just lures you in.
In this case, what lures you in is a huge sparkly “𝙐𝙋 𝙏𝙊 90% 𝙊𝙁𝙁 𝘾𝙃𝙍𝙄𝙎𝙏𝙈𝘼𝙎 𝙎𝘼𝙇𝙀” sign.
Now that’s a kind of sign anyone can gladly get behind, rich or not.
So you willingly enter, letting the devil sitting on your shoulder win this time.
While you are browsing the jeans section, you spot three younger looking girls off the distance.
Oddly enough, they remind you of Seokjin, Hoseok, and Jimin.
One is looking sporty while wearing a jersey with some sports team on it-- honestly, you’re not sure which one cause why would you be?
The other one is looking all soft, having one of the warmest smiles you’ve ever seen while wearing a really fluffy pastel blue jumper.
Then, the third girl has the same level of scandalousness as Seokjin's laugh. Only hers is a snorting laugh and not a windshield wiper one.
Just like that, the events that took place at the food court a few minutes ago come flooding in your mind.
A soft gasp escapes from your lips as a deep realisation hits you.
Oh no
You were acting completely hideous to them!
To think that it’s Seokjin’s birthday tomorrow.
And you rejected Jimin’s affections not once but twice!
Oh no, indeed.
You BET they’re planning to kick you out of their group right now.
IS THAT WHY JUNGKOOK WANTED TO KNOW WHERE YOU ARE?!
Oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god
Wanting to project your frustrations somehow, you sauntered towards the group of girls.
In your defense, you’re too deep in your internal panic to notice how much of a greasy creeper you look like right now.
“So, anyways, I said to him his dic---”
“Hi there, girls!” You tried to sound as cheerily as you can and not as if you are literally on the verge of a breakdown.
They all blink at you like a bunch of lost owls.
Who are you and what do you want? No, they can’t donate money to you.
You are waiting for them to say something but they’re all clearly just judging you.
Well, this is awkward…
You clear your throat, “I just want to say that you girls look a lot like three of my friends!”
They’re like uh okay…..and?
“That is, if they still want to be my friends….If you haven’t asked, I was kind of really mean to them a while ago AND I wish I could take it all back! I’m sure I really hurt their feelings…”
Cool story bro! But I think you’ve missed the part where thEY? DIDN’T? ASK????
You notice that two of them are holding a pair of distressed high-rise boyfriend jeans.
Feeling like you have to talk about something that they can relate to, you steer the topic towards that.
“Ah, I remember when I was obsessed with these. I practically lived off of them a few years back! I owned like eight pairs of them….Of course, I’ve never had a boyfriend--WHICH is quite sad to think about….22 years old and no experience whatsoever. Yep….really really sad….”
You blink your tears away a couple of times, still trying to hold it in, while the three girls exchange an alarmed look.
Not because you seem to be looking like you’re about to cry, heck NO! But because you seem like a total nutcase and that they need to get away from you asap.
“Anyways, did you know that this specific brand imports their stuff from Myanmar? Really riveting country! Except for the part where they still allow child labour….”
The girls watch you silently as a few tears slip from your face.
They look at the jeans they’re holding then back to you.
You take that as a sign to continue your monologue.
“Those jeans you’re holding right now could have very well been made by tiny little Burmese hands that deserve to experience their childhood in a much more liberating way!”
At this point, you are now sobbing.
Yep. She’s completely deranged.
“Oh, but uhm..You’d enjoy them.”
Without even uttering a single word, the three girls manage to send telepathic messages with each other to put the jeans down, then slowly back away from the lunatic (you), and just…
GOTTA ZAYN— Wait, oops wrong fandom!
DASHI RUN RUN RUN!!
“HeY- whERE ARE YOU GIRLS GOING?? I THOUGHT WE WERE ALL BONDING HERE?”
You continue to call out to them while the people around stare at you.
Within seconds, an employee appears in front of you and she looks Pissed with a capital P.
“Miss, you are causing quite a scene here. I’m sorry but you need to leave now!”
But you haven’t even properly looked through the sale!
“But I--”
“Now!”
You stand your ground firmly and make no show of moving.
Oh, you are really pushing her
“Miss, I’m very serious. If you don’t go, I would have to call security to escort you out.”
“Uh, Ashley! No need for that.” A voice comes from behind.
You look behind and it’s..
“Kookie, bunny!” Ashley proclaims.
Kookie, bunny???
“She’s a friend of mine.” Jungkook steps between you and Ashley.
Ashley peeks at you and openly gives you a stink eye.
“She’s your friend?”
“Yes and I would really appreciate it if you let her be.”
She scoffs.
“She’s causing trouble AND she just scared three customers away!”
You did?
But...but….but you’re a sweet girl!
Why and how would you even be able to do such things?
“You can leave her to me.”
“But bunny!”
He places a hand on her shoulder and just like that, you know that she’s a complete goner.
“Ashley, I would seriously appreciate it if you could let her off this time. I’ll take responsibility over what happened. I swear, she won’t be a bother again.” He says in a smooth and calm voice.
Uh…….
Wow?
That’s something you’ve never heard from him before.
You did not think he has it in him to be this cool AT ALL.
“Fine. BUT! I’m cutting your break now so get her out of here and get back to work!”
Before she leaves, she snarls at you then gives Jungkook a really playful smirk.
(Which totally flies over they innocent lad)
Once she leaves, Jungkook grabs a hold of your arm and drags you (gently) out of the shop.
Well
That was weird….
That’s the most interaction you’ve seen from Jungkook without him slowly disintegrating into the void because of pure shyness.
Once outside, he somehow reverts back to his old shy self and you two are left standing awkwardly facing each other.
“I uh, don’t really know what happened but…..I hope you don’t do it again--oh gOd, I’m not bossing you again! I swear!”
He starts looking everywhere but you and his hands visibly fidget with the fray strands of the ripped holes on his jeans.
Oop and we're back to square one with his confidence!
“Listen, I just don’t want to get in trouble, as much as I’m not a huge fan of my work.”
Okay, you sense a pattern here.
First Seokjin, then Jimin, then maybe Hoseok too even if you’re not sure if you did anything directly to him…..
And now Jungkook too???
Oh hell no!
You’re not losing him too.
“It’s okay, Jungkook! It’s my fault for causing a scene and I’m sorry about it!”
Sniff.
Oh no.
Are you? About to cry? In front of Jungkook? While he’s alone???
“Please don’t be mad! I don’t really wanna lose you too.” You manage to speak in between sniffs.
Okayyyyyy you are definitely about to cry!
And Jungkook doesn’t want to deal with that!
Not because he’s a douche but because he just doesn’t know how to, okay?
He’s getting really uncomfortable now.
You bow your head and he knows that this is it. Here comes the water works.
“ThAT’s ᵒᵏᵃʸ! I don’t mind at all!” He says in a really rushed and panicked voice. “I uh, really need to go now. I’ll just text you later about Seokjin hyung’s birthday plan! Ok, ᵍᵒᵒᵈ ᵗᵃˡᵏ BYE…”
And he scrambles away faster than you could say “Kookie, bunny”
Rude much? You didn’t even understand what he said at how fast he mumbled his words out.
“Why is everyone leaving me??” You whisper quietly to yourself.
╥﹏╥
Namjoon pretends to check on this particular bedroom showcase in front of him as he spies on you a couple of meters away.
You seem to be awfully quiet and immobile….
Well, this is just dismaying and horrifying.
He, as always, wants to be snapped away by Thanos.
Does he approach you now?? Are you okay now?? Are you not gonna potentially hurl at him now?? Are you gonna cry your heart out on him now??
GOD, SO MANY UNCERTAINTIES!
Why does he have to be the one dealing with you? He thought he moved on with his issues concerning you.
YoU gUyS aReN't eVen pAiRED WITH EACH OTHER!!!
Curse Jungkook and his ability to wrap everyone around his darn finger.
Tbh
Namjoon didn’t see the big deal about you being on your period. He assumed the other guys were exaggerating with how they described your unusual behaviour and that maybe they just didn’t have enough knowledge about periods.
NOT THAT HE’S SAYING HE’S AN EXPERT ABOUT IT CAUSE HE’S NOT.
But he likes to think that he’s somewhat informed about it based on what he learned in school.
Oh boy is he wrong.
Suddenly, he doesn’t feel so bad about never having to date a girl in his entire life.
This is madness and he doesn’t think it’s something he can manage to keep up with every month!
He’s been trying to approach you countless times now ever since Jungkook texted him after lunch break saying the younger lad needs his help with talking to you.
The first time around, he made the wrong decision to casually walk up to you and hit you with a conversation…..
**** Flashback ****
Namjoon spots you stocking up duvet covers rather harshly.
He should’ve taken that as a caution but he was too confident for his own good.
“Heyyy Y/n!” He greets you with his world famous dimples on show.
He’s come to realise in the last few weeks that it makes you all bashful and he ain’t afraid to use it against you.
“Are you ready to go about the party for later?”
You grunt and slam the duvet cover you are holding on to the display.
“I don’t have time to be thinking about parties! I’m seriously behind on stocking up on these displays!”
He winces at your reply but quickly recovers and goes back to his sunny disposition.
“But it seems like you’re about to be done, though?” He states a matter of fact, seeing that you only have about five more on your pile.
“UGH! Why can’t you let me work in peace? Look, now I’m running out of duvet covers to stock up aNd yOU dON’t EveN SeEM TO CARE!!”
Abort mission, abort mission!
Namjoon quickly yeets himself out of the picture before you quite possibly shove him deep in the display for him to disappear until someone uncovers him years later.
**** End of Flashback ****
Now, Namjoon knows how to handle problems through a scientific, logical, and calculated way.
Meaning, if something doesn’t work out on the first try, you take note of where things went wrong then take that into consideration on your second attempt.
On his first attempt, he obviously didn’t gauge your mood to adjust his approach around it.
That’s what he’s gonna do next!
Just watch and he’s for sure gonna ace this.
(Spoiler alert: he doesn’t)
**** Flashback to attempt #2 ****
(・_├┬┴┬┴
Namjoon lurks behind a tall shelf and observes you.
Like a little brown noser--err, like a sensible eyewitness.
He needs to know if you’re in a better mood now so he can work out his moves precisely.
Hmmmmmm……
Your back is turned from him but judging with the way you’re currently stocking up on cushions, you seem quite passive.
Well, that is until two kids ran past you, screaming bloody murder.
You yelp in surprise and toss a cushion away, hitting a nearby lamp.
He catches a glimpse of your red face and yep! Still fuming.
A random lady unfortunately commits the mistake of going up to you and tapping your shoulder.
This simple touch seems to push you to the edge.
“Oh my, be careful sweetie!”
You chuck another cushion but this time, you do it intentionally and then you step closer to her.
“You wanna tell me how to do my job properly, huh? Go ahead! I. Dare. You.”
And as if sirens rang in the background, the lady scurries off to be as far away from you as possible.
Wow.
And that was an innocent customer!
As much as Namjoon wants to scold you about it, he chooses to let it slip because he doesn’t want to prematurely die (contrary to popular belief)
Oh, well. On to the next attempt!
**** End of Flashback ****
He tried two more times after that and in all of those, he chickened out.
Ok, so he only tried a total of four times so “countless times” could maybe be a stretch
BUt that’s already too much dilly dallying while he’s working!
ANYWAYS
He takes a peek at you again and— aH shit you’re not there anymore! Where the hell have you gone?
He takes his eyes off of you for five seconds and you disappear! He should put a tracker on you tbh.
Damn you really are making the daDdy jump out of Namjoon, huh?
Just then, a monster-like noise erupts from somewhere near him.
“UrggGgggHhhhhHhHhhhh………..”
Wtf was that?!
It sounded like it came from the bedroom showcase behind the one he’s camping in.
That did not sound good at all.
He quickly goes there to check that no rowdy kids are playing with the display like always.
The last thing he needs before clocking out is dealing with a couple of demon children.
(He’s already dealing with you lot)
Alright, time to give these kids a piece of his mind!
“Pardon me, but I have to kindly ask—Y/N?!”
Oh, what a sight it is that greets him.
You are currently lying down on a model bed on your stomach, face planted on the cushions.
Namjoon is completely appalled to the 10th power.
What sort of ICEA blasphemy is this?! Surely, this breaks like a couple of employee rules!
He tugs one of your Cʜᴀɴɴᴇʟ adorned foot.
No response.
He tugs it again.
No response.
“Y/n….”
No response.
Big fat sigh….
Let Namjoon repeat himself,,,
Curse Jungkook and his ability to wrap everyone around his darn finger.
Speaking of the devil,
Namjoon feels his phone buzz from his back pocket. He checks it to see a text from the younger lad saying he’s on his way to ICEA to meet them.
Thank Jesus!
“Y/n, get your butt up now! Jungkook is on his way to meet us.” He tells you in which you respond with another awful sound of discomfort.
It’s taking every fibre in him to not just yeet you away from the bed.
And you BET that Namjoon can easily toss you around if he wanted too. It's from lifting furniture all these years.
“I’m serious! He’d be here in a few minutes!”
You raise your head and you flail around while muttering incoherent words.
Namjoon is like (❍ᴥ❍) i don't know this chick.
“Why should I care if Jungkook is coming here??” You whine like an 8 year old.
“BECAUSE! We’re throwing a party for Seokjin hyung later and you’re assigned on the decorations with him.”
Fina-FREAKING-lly he gets to fill you in on their plan after lurking for hours!
“Oh.” You meekly say.
Then you drop your head back on to the soft cushions and let out a muffled cry.
Namjoon rolls his eyes.
“Oh hush! Can you just PLEASE function like a normal human being for the next hour or so?”
That made you whip your head sharply to face him. Headaches be damned.
And that’s when he knew, he fucked up.
“How about you try and bleed for seven days straight while everything about you turns into crazy town? Let's see if you can last!" You end your retort with a sharp kick to his surprisingly toned thigh.
OkAY THAT'S IT. NAMJOON HAS HAD ENOUGH.
"Alright! If you don't want to move your butt then I'll do it for you!"
Namjoon rolls his non-existent sleeves up then starts jumping a couple of times before cracking his neck while stretching his arms. Anyone passing by would think he's about to do something really strenuous.
Unceremoniously, he hauls your heaving arse onto his shoulders and struts away.
“Uh, excuse us, please…...nothing to see here, sir……..just helping this faint girl……..”
This is extremely uncomfortable and embarrassing for Namjoon but I can’t say the same for you because you lowkey enjoy being carried by him.
Actually, you’d enjoy being carried by anyone right now tbh.
……...Except maybe for Tae.
Lol
A couple of agonising minutes later, a very mentally and physically exhausted Namjoon staggers out of ICEA while carrying/dragging his backpack, his cute little Ryan lunch box, your Louie Button backpack that surely costs more than his entire month salary, and a crying you.
Jungkook, whom I must mention is still unbelievably very clueless about your period, is quite taken aback by Namjoon’s distraught look and your tear filled eyes.
What the Minecraft blazes is going on?
Namjoon sets you on the ground and you INSTANTLY drop to the ground--nO, you don’t lie down. You’re too good for that! But you sit, hugging your knees to your chest, instead.
Jungkook rushes to you, asking what’s wrong.
“Ugggggghhhh..asegdhsi….ahwhd…”
o-Okay……
Jungkook doesn’t speak alien but for some reason, the annoyed and tired look his Namjoon hyung is sending your way makes him think of something.
“Hyung, did you do something to her?” Jungkook accuses him as he rubs one of your arms.
“ME?! WhY wOuLd yOu tHINK I’D DO SOMETHING TO HER????”
“Well….ʸᵒᵘ ᵈᵒ ˡⁱᵏᵉ ᵗᵒ ⁿᵃᵍ ᵗᵒ ʰᵉʳ ᵃᵇᵒᵘᵗ ʷᵒʳᵏ”
“I-”
Namjoon can’t believe what he’s hearing right now.
WhY does everyone automatically think he’s somehow the reason for your agonies? And to think that he just spent the last few minutes dragging and heaving you around ICEA.
“I didn’t do anything to her, alright?”
“..................Okay, hyung.”
Clearly, Jungkook doesn’t believe him.
Amidst your menstrual cramps and Namjoon’s imminent mental breakdown, Jimin arrives at the scene. (Before anyone forgets, he’s supposed to take care of the food with Namjoon.)
He takes one look at your miserable state, Namjoon’s aggravated face, and Jungkook’s slight accusatory look pointed towards the older guy, and then
"What did you do now, Namjoon hyung?”
“OH FU--GIVE ME A BREAK!”
૮( ᵒ̌▱๋ᵒ̌ )ა
Namjoon is sERIOUSLY one breath away from k-wording everyone including himself. AND he is definitely starting with you!
“Okay, okay! Calm down! Deep breaths. Remember the breathing exercises Hoseok hyung taught you.” Jimin leads him in taking deep breaths.
Namjoon closes his eyes and does what he’s told to. He doesn’t want to pop a vein, okay?
“That’s it. Inhale deeply through your nose and slowly exhale through your mouth. Remember your happy place!”
And by “happy place”, he imagines himself in ICEA, surrounded by hundreds of people.
Just like how he always dreams, all the employees are there, the customers are gathered as well, and his friends are also present. Everyone cheers as he’s being awarded the managerial position. Michael is somewhere at the back trying to get his attention but alas, Namjoon doesn’t have time for puny peasants. But then, something new catches his eye. What’s this? Who’s this girl crying in the crowd? Oh, it’s you! “Namjoon, why is she crying?”, his boss asks him. “Uh, I don’t know, sir..”, he quickly replies as you now start to wail. The cheers die down and people begin to whisper about the commotion. “What do you mean ‘you don’t know’, huh? Aren’t you supposed to have everything under control?”, his boss raises an eyebrow and Namjoon starts to panic. “I, uh, I really--”, he gets cut off by you, screaming bloody murder. Completely disturbed, the customers all leave the store, much to his dismay. “Are you not going to do anything?”, once again his boss asks him but unfortunately it’s like he’s stuck, frozen. He’s unable to do anything as he watches you make a huge scene. “I think I made a mistake promoting you. It’s clear that you are not cut out for this. I mean, look at you! You’re not even saying anything. Hello?? Namjoon? Namjoon???? NAMJOON??? NAM-”
“NAMJOON HYUNG!”
Wait, what? Where is he? What year is it? Is he dead???
Jimin is clutching his shoulders and is looking very concerned at him.
Oh, it was just a daydream…. Oh, right! He was doing his calming technique.
Well, that obviously did not work AT ALL.
“Are you okay? It was like you were having a nightmare or something.” You ask him, now on your feet and looking very……”normal”
Namjoon squints his eyes towards you.
Okay, that’s absolutely it.
He’s 100% done with your bullshit and all the switching moods and personalities!
“No, I’m actually not okay! And you know why? Because you’re being very very very difficult right now to a fault!”
He points at you and he sees your eyes start to water ever so slightly.
“You’re gonna cry again, aren’t you?”
“What? No, I’m not.” You say but Namjoon doesn’t miss the way you lower lip quivers.
“Yes, you are.”
“No, I’m not.”
“.......”
“.......”
"ⁱᵐ ⁿᵒᵗ ᵍᵒⁿⁿᵃ ᶜʳʸ" You try to convince them with your face looking like (ಡ﹏ಡ)
The three boys are obviously not fooling for it even though you're doing a decent job holding it in.
Unfortunately, you’re not as tough as you are because a single tear rolls down your face.
Namjoon looks up to the heavens and releases a huge sigh.
“Alright. Come here.” He opens his arms and you slowly walk up to him so he can awkwardly hug you.
While watching this, Jimin feels something inside him that he never really feels….
Is this…..betrayal??
Didn’t you keep rejecting any forms of physical touch from him this morning?
Or is it just him that you don't like?
Wow, now he feels a twinge of pain in his stomach which he taught he could never feel!
“That was a very mean thing you just said to me…”
“Okay, okay. I’m sorry for saying that. I was just really frustrated cause I don’t know how to act around you.”
Alright, Jungkook is usually lost on what the conversation is about. But this one has really left him baffled!
What does Namjoon mean that he doesn't know how to act around you?? Surely, that's never been a problem!
And why are you crying so much and acting all weird today?!
All of a sudden, you groan and bury your face on Namjoons t̶i̶d̶d̶i̶e̶s̶ chest. If you weren't so out of it, you'd probably faint from the closeness between you two.
This gets Jungkook thinking even more.
Clearly, you're in pain!
Hmmmmmmmmmm
Didn't the other guys talk about you this morning?? He's sure you were the topic at some point but what was it about?
Wait a second….
He remembers them mentioning about some "female problems"!
Mood swings, problems specific to women, the guys not knowing how to act around you, pain….GASP!
You're on your period!
How and why did Jungkook easily piece it together? Simple! He lives with three younger sisters and more often than not, he looks after them.
And because he's fully aware of how messed up a girl can actually be during their time of the month, he can't help but let his "concerned older brother" side take over.
As the only guy in the friend group that has a sister, he feels obligated to lend a helping hand.
"I think I can help with this." He announces.
The two guys are like "woah jungkook's initiating to lead? is this for real?"
"Uh, Kook, what are you talking about?"
"I mean with Y/n's current state. I can help calm her down."
Namjoon and Jimin exchange hesitant glances. It's not because they don't trust him but it's because it's Jungkook we're talking about! Come on, the guy could barely take his own order at a fast food chain!
"I just think, among all of us, I'm the one who gets to deal with lady problems on the daily so…"
Well, that's a very strong and valid reason.
Not to mention, Namjoon is getting awfully tired and Jimin is still not able to go near you.
"Alright then. What do you say we do?"
With that, Jungkook leads as the other guys drag you towards the nearest drugstore.
Completely focused on your period problems as if none of you have tasks for Seokjin’s birthday bash in less than an hour.
Oh well!
(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧Taglist: @loveyoongles @sonderkook @thequeen-kat @itsfeliciatime
50 notes · View notes
christycurlswrites · 27 days ago
Text
I Won't Give Up
Bucky x Reader Soulmate
Warnings: Memories, Protective Bucky, Sweet moments with the team, Supportive Bucky
Please do not steal, plagarize or repost my work on any other site. Likes and reblogs make me happy.
I do not have a beta reader. All mistakes are my own.
Summary: Y/N and Bucky are soulmates, bound together. What happens when one cannot remember the other? (I suck at summaries)
Taglist is open for this story! Please let me know what you think!
Dividers by @whimsicalrogers
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Chapter 7 (Part 1)
*A/N- This chapter got away from me in the best way. I'm so happy with the way it turned out. I'm obviously missing some members of the team. Part 2 of this chapter will be out by Tuesday.
Y/N sat in the common room, her eyes locked on the television. She couldn't remember what was on. If anyone asked what she was watching she wouldn't be able to say.
Bucky had been pulled into a training session by Wanda. Her trainees needed a challenge. Who better than Bucky?
Her mind wandered. She had been living in the tower for years with Bucky. She had to have built some relationships while she was here. lationships while she was here. Right? She had connections to the people that shared this common space.
“Can I join you?” Natasha broke Y/N’s spell. “I brought drinks!” Natasha eagerly smiled at the two mugs of hot tea in her hands.
“Yeah.” Y/N smiled as she moved to make room. “Yeah of course.”
Natasha offered the cup as she took her seat. She cleared her throat. “How are you?”
Y/N shrugged as she sipped. “Good.”
“You know what I mean.” Natasha pushed.
“No really. I’m good.”
Sitting back on the couch Natasha sighed as she looked at Y/N. “You may be able to convince Bucky you are alright. That’s because he doesn’t want to push.” She smirked as she saw Y/N’s jaw tighten. “But you can’t lie to me. Not after everything we have shared.”
“And what would that be?” Y/N snapped, anger painted on her face. “What the hell do you know about me now?”
Natasha sat forward, one hand out in defense. “I’m sorry. I didn’t me-”
“No- I think you did mean it. You just didn’t anticipate my reaction!” Y/N put the cup on the table as she began to move her arms around as she spoke. “I think you are so used to the old me that you expect me to act like her. Let me give you a fucking newsflash. I’m not her! I can’t be her! I don’t even know who the fuck she was!”
“You’re right.” Natasha answered. “You’re right.”
Y/N took a deep breath, her hands tangled together. “I’m sorry. It’s just…” She looked around as she searched for the words. “Anytime I see any of you all I get is looks of expectation. You guys hope I will wake up one day and remember. Then I get to watch the disappointment as you realize I have nothing.” She cursed as the tears began to form. “Bucky has gotten better at hiding his disappointment but I still see it.”
“It’s ok.” Natasha moved to be closer to Y/N, adding her cup to the table. “You are doin-”
“Ugh!” Y/N exclaimed as she waved her arms. “Don’t fucking tell me I am doing great. Or that I will be alright. Or that I’m getting better. I can’t hear that again!” She wiped the tears from her cheeks as she began to fall, unaware her voice became louder the longer she went on. “I’m not ok. I’m not going to be ok. There is a very good chance I won’t remember everything. I am so sick of people telling me that!”
Before she could stop herself Natasha wrapped Y/N in her arms, gently rocking her as she cried. “You’re right.” Natasha repeated, wishing she knew what else to say.
Y/N cried until she had no tears left, her breath coming quick. She didn’t realize how much she had been holding in. She clung to Natasha as the emotions poured out. Once she was dried up she straightened, her hands still clinging to Natasha’s arms. She winced as she saw the tear stains on Natasha’s blouse. “I’m sorry.” She mumbled as she wiped her nose with her sleeve.
“No need for apologies.” Natasha said, still holding onto Y/N as long as she wanted to. “It sounds like you needed this.” She cleared her throat as she grabbed her cup again. “Have you talked to Bucky about this?”
Y/N chuckled. “More like yelled at him.” She rubbed her eyes. “I don’t know if he is ready for this.”
Cocking her head to the side Natasha had to agree to a certain point. She knew she had to pick her words carefully. Saying too much would make her break a promise she had made to Bucky. “He has a lot of hope. But Bucky is also a realist. At the end of the day he wants you to be ok with who you are. Memories or not.”
“That would be easier if I knew who I was.” Y/N tried to keep her voice level.
A few beats of silence passed. “Maybe you need to figure out who you are now. Then be ok with that person.” She ran her fingers through her flame red hair.
“But I have lost so much.”
“I know.” Natasha whispered. “Maybe all of us are looking at this the wrong way.” She smirked at Y/N’s questioning gaze. “Before I say this I want to say something. You are family. No matter what happens from here on out. We love you Y/N. It seems we have been going about this the wrong way.” She took Y/N’s hands in hers. “I’m sorry. I know I’ve contributed to this. Maybe, if you like this idea, I can start to help a bit.” Clearing her throat she continued. “What if, instead of doing this alone, you asked us what our memories of you are.” She shrugged as she continued to explain. “It may not strike anything. But I think it may help all of us let go of expectations and pain.”
Y/N looked at Natasha in amazement. “Fuck that’s a good idea.” She looked around, slightly annoyed she had not thought of this. “So…” She adjusted to look at Natasha. “What is your memory of me?”
Allowing the first genuine smile, Natasha grabbed Y/N’s cup and stood. “Come with me.” She turned and walked to the kitchen.
Getting to her feet Y/N hobbled behind her. She stopped at the kitchen island and sat as Natasha instructed. She watched as Natasha made a fresh pot of hot tea, making sure the pot was hot before adding the tea. As she waited for the tea to steep Natasha got a plate from the cabinet, placing various cookies on it before setting it in front of Y/N. She smiled as she cleaned the cups out and returned with milk and sugar, finally placing the teapot on the island as she took the seat next to Y/N.
“My memory, the one that always gives me comfort, is this.” Natasha explained as she poured the tea and gently moved the milk and sugar to Y/N. “We had a ritual you and I. After every mission you would wait in the hanger for us to leave the quinjet. If Bucky was on the mission you would check him and make sure he was alright. Of course if he was injured or rattled or anything other than ordinary after the mission, you had to stay with him. If not you would kiss him and send him off for a shower and bed. Then you and I would head here, to this spot.” She tapped the island. “The set up was as you see now. The hot pot of tea, milk, sugar and cookies. Then we would talk. About anything and everything. Sometimes it was the mission, other times the book you had just read, sometimes the latest celebrity gossip. Nothing was off the table.” She laughed at the memories flooding back to her. “You always made everything better. No matter what the mission was- I always knew this would be waiting for me. You have no idea how many times I wanted to beat the shit out of Bucky on the way back because I knew I wouldn’t get to have this.”
Guilt filled Y/N. “I’m so sorry I don’t remember.”
Shaking her head Natasha leaned forward, resting her hands on Y/N’s knees. “No need for apologies. This just means we get to do this again. If you want to that is.”
“Yeah.” Y/N agreed. “It sounds nice to have girl time.” She clanked her cup against Natasha’s, returning the smile.
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“Clint!” Y/N greeted as she walked into the common room. “Got a minute?”
Clint tilted his head as he smiled. “Good to see you kid.”
“Kid?” Y/n wrinkled her brow. “Pretty sure I’m the same age as you.”
Laughing Clint stood and embraced her. “It is good to see you. Barnes has been keeping you all to himself.” He looked at her face as he pulled away. “I hear the secret to get to you is coffee.”
“Coffee does make me happy.” She agreed. “I’m sorry for not being around. It’s been…”
“Overwhelming?” Clint offered.
“I think that word encompasses it best.” She sighed. “Bucky hasn’t been keeping me away. I just haven’t had the energy. I don’t know who I am anymore. So how can I carry a conversation with you when I can’t remember?”
“First- you never have to apologize. We all have our own issues.” Clint sat down at the island. “It’s understandable- you not wanting to come out. To be fair we weren’t as accommodating as we could be. I mean you were thrown into a get together the moment you came home. As good as our intentions were- that should not have happened. I was hoping you would have listened to Bucky and stayed in the room.”
Y/N winced as she sat. “You heard that huh?”
“Yeah.” Clint chuckled. “You looked so overwhelmed that night. I felt so bad. You looked like a lost puppy at times.”
“Is that why you didn’t come talk to me?”
“Yes! It would have felt like kicking the puppy!” Clint defended as he motioned to her.
Y/N laughed in spite of herself. “Well this puppy has a question.”
“Shoot.”
“Now you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. If you need some time to answer I’m ok with that.” Y/N explained. “But… what is a memory you have of me?”
Clint sat back, a smile on his lips. He raised his hands and began to move them, sometimes drawing letters in the air. He watched as Y/N followed his hands, her brow wrinkling in concentration, and her lips mouthing the letters she caught. When he was done he sat back and crossed his arms.
Y/N was quiet for a moment, her brain trying to comprehend what she had seen. “You’re deaf.” She whispered.
“Only when I want to be.” He pointed to his ear as he leaned forward. “These babies help. But they also allow my world to be quiet when I need it.” He motioned to his hearing aids. “You and I would sign. Nat knows how to but she showed up knowing. Wanda just reads my mind, after I give her permission of course, if I choose to be silent. Everyone else just gives me what I point at. But you…” He pointed at her. “Asked me to teach you. You were the only one who took the initiative to learn. Then we created our own code. Nat couldn’t break it. It was just you and me kid.”
Resting her chin on her hand Y/N sighed. “And I remember nothing.”
Clint shrugged. “Such is life.”
“I’m going to get something to eat.” Y/n made her way to the fridge and opened it. Turning back to Clint she asked “Do you want anything?”
Clint took his chance. He raised his hands again and signed ‘chicken and cheese sandwich.’
Y/n turned to the fridge and looked for a moment. She raised her hands as she turned back, signing 'mozzarella, cheddar or swiss?’ She stood waiting for her answer before it hit her. “Holy fuck!” She covered her mouth in shock. “I did it!”
“Yes you did!” Clint laughed.
She raised her hands to sign again, unable to think of the words. She kept her hands in the air, her fingers hanging in anticipation. “Come on…” She grumbled. Her finger did nothing. “Shit.” She closed the fridge in frustration. “Fuck!”
“Take a breath kid.” Clint stood and walked to stand next to her. He looked at the doorway and motioned for Bucky to stay. He was sure Bucky would make things worse or pull her away. “It’s ok.” He leaned into her space as she leaned on the island. “This reminds me of the frog and the caterpillar.”
Y/N scoffed as she rolled her eyes. “So now I’m a frog?”
“You’re the caterpillar.”
“Because I'll become a butterfly?”
“You gonna keep interrupting or can I finish?” Clint asked, waiting for her permission to continue. “The frog was intrigued with the caterpillar, fascinated with the way she could move all of her feet in unison without falling. One day the frog asked how she did it. The caterpillar realized she had never thought about it before. Once she did, the caterpillar kept tripping over her feet.”
“So I could do it when I wasn’t thinking.”
“Muscle memory.” Clint offered. “But, if you are up for it, I can teach you again.”
Y/N smiled. “Can we create a new code?”
Clint laughed. “I think that can be arranged.”
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Bucky leaned against the wall a few feet away from the doorway, relief filling him. He didntt want to interrupt. But he didn’t want her overwhelmed either. He pushed off the wall and walked away, Y/N’s laughter catching his ears as he walked.
Y/N was getting better about walking on her own throughout the tower. She made sure to stop at the front desk and have conversations with Bill when she could. She didn’t want to get him into trouble. She had begun to remember faces, names were another story. Thankfully most people settled for a nod and a wave.
“I thought that was you!” A young man with brown hair ran up to her, catching her off guard. “I’m sorry!” He exclaimed. I didn’t mean to scare you. Mr. Barnes will kill me if I did anything.”
Narrowing her eyes Y/N recognized this kid. Her brain running through the files. “Why would Bucky kill you?”
Bucky stiffened at the corner of the wall. He had heard Y/N's yelp. He cursed the kid under his breath. He was impressed Y/N had recovered quickly. He hoped she would remember who the kid was.
"Well, you see, Mr. Barnes doesn't like seeing you scared. I don't blame him. So if he saw me scaring you I would be in trouble." The kid watched as she nodded. "I'm Peter." He held out in hand in greeting.
Recognition spread across her face. "Peter Parker!" She exclaimed as she enthusiastically took his hand. "I'm so sorry!"
Peter waved her off. “No worries. But I do have a question.” He cleared his throat before continuing. “I heard you are going around asking people for memories with you. But you haven’t asked me yet.”
“To be fair…” Y/N held her hand up in defense. “I didn’t remember your name until you said it.”
“True…” Peter laughed awkwardly. “But I was hoping, if you have time, I could show you what my memory of you is.”
Giving him a genuine smile Y/N nodded. “I would like that.”
“Great.” Peter smiled as he walked away. “Meet me in the screening room at 8pm.” He ran off as he spoke.
Shaking her head Y/N kept walking, completely unaware of the soldier stalking behind her.
At 8pm sharp Y/n walked into the screening room, her tumblr of water tucked under her arm. She waved at Peter as he sat next to her, placing a bowl of popcorn on her lap.
Peter looked behind him, noticing Bucky trying to sneak it. He looked with wide eyes at Bucky, unsure if he should acknowledge him. Bucky made the decision for him as he looked at Peter with a finger over his mouth in a bid to keep him quiet. “We used to watch old movies together. Friday!” Peter yelled. “Please play back to the future.”
Y/N wrinkled her brow as she looked at Peter. “Back to the Future?” She questioned. “You know that’s not an old film right?”
“Yes it is.”
“No it’s not.” She argued as Bucky swallowed his laugh.”Friday!” Y/N yelled. “Please play Duck Soup by The Marx Brothers.”
“Why?” Peter asked with his arms open. “Back to the Future is old.”
“Back to the Future was released during my childhood. If you want to talk about old- Duck Soup was released in 1933. And it’s still funny.” She settled into the chair. “Shhhhh… It’s starting..” She motioned to the screen and popped a piece of popcorn in her mouth.
Peter smiled as he settled. “I missed this.”
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Y/N sat in the library, her book opened on her lap. She was lost to the pages, exploring the world created by the words. Her eyes were glued to the book.
“Y/N.” Bruce spoke softly, his body relaxing when she returned his gaze. “How are you.”
She sat up straight and closed the book, smiling in satisfaction as her spine cracked. “I’m good.” She exhaled. “Today was a good day.”
“Good.” He motioned to the spot next to her. “May I?”
Moving over she motioned for him to sit. After a few beats of silence she asked. “Are you going to ask me what everyone else is?”
“I figured I would tell you what my memory is.” He cleared his throat and took a deep breath. “I used to try a lot of things to figure out how to control the big guy. I stayed angry, i meditated, did yoga, ate healthy, avoided stressful situations as best I could. They would work for a bit before they stopped. Then I was looking for something else.” He ran his fingers through his short hair. “One day I was in the common room watching television. I think I was watching a science show when you sat next to me. You ate your cereal quietly as you watched with me. Once the show was over I tossed you the remote. You changed it to The Great British Baking Show. Apparently it was the start of the new season. I became hooked. It became a quiet routine. We would meet up and watch the Great British Baking Show.” He giggled as the memories came back to him. “We were so mad when our girl was kicked off.”
Y/N smiled sadly. “That was our thing?”
“Not the only thing. I found I liked having those moments. Then we would talk about them during the week. Once that show was over you mentioned a show that became our obsession- Downton Abbey.”
Looking at him with confusion on her face Y/N questioned- “Downton Abbey?”
“Yes!” Bruce exclaimed as he made her jump. “God we were obsessed. We used to talk about it all the time, quote our favorite lines, talk about what could happen. We annoyed everyone. Literally people would roll their eyes and beg us to stop when we started.” He chuckled. “Downton Abbey was our life for a bit. Once it was announced the show was ending we did a huge marathon of the show, taking up the common room every night leading up to the finale.”
“It must have been a good show.” She mumbled. “It sucks that I can’t remember it.”
“Think about it like this.” Bruce leaned into her space as he continued. “You can watch it with fresh eyes. And we can watch the movie!” He said said with excitement in his voice.
“There was a movie?!” Y/N asked.
“Oh hell yeah!” Bruce laughed at her expression. “We went opening night and the theater gave out little snow globes as keepsakes. We both got one.”
“I’ve never seen a snowglobe.”
“We both got one.” Bruce reiterated. “Maybe it’s in your room and you didn't notice.” He stood. “Let me get mine. Do you mind waiting a moment?” He stepped out of the library, returning before she had the chance to finish a paragraph in her book. He held a small snowglobe in the palm of his hand.
Y/N Smiled as she picked it up and looked at it. “I’ll be right back.” She stood as she gave the snowglobe back. Running to her room she acknowledged Bucky as she began to look around. She scanned every table top and dresser, looking on the end tables and in the bathroom. She sat on the bed as she pulled the drawer from her end table out and began to rifle through it.
Bucky stood, watching her with curious eyes. “What are you looking for?”
“Bruce said we got a snowglobe when we went to see the Downton Abbey movie. But I can’t find mine.”
“Ugh!” Bucky groaned as he sat on the bed.
Y/N froze. “What?” She questioned.
“I don’t think I can live through another Downton Abbey phase.”
“The way Bruce described it makes it sounds like it was our life.”
“It was for a while.” Bucky chuckled. He stood and walked to the dresser, picking up the snowglobe. “I was cleaning and put the frame in front of this. But here.” He placed the snowglobe in her hands before he sat down. “As much as I hated Downton Abbey It was something you loved and it helped Bruce.”
“There is something I’ve been meaning to ask you.”
“I have too many good memories of you.”
“Oh that conversation will happen. But not right now.” She shifted so she could face him. “Why are you doing all this? I mean I know we are soulmates. But it couldn’t have been easy.”
Bucky cleared his throat. “It’s worth it because it’s you. You are the most important thing in my life. I will do whatever you need me to do.” He took a deep breath before he continued. “I know these last few months have been terrifying for you. My biggest concern is that you feel safe.”
She gave a shy smile. “You really won’t give up will you?”
“Nope.” Bucky emphasized the p as he answered right away.
She sat closer Bucky, leaning her head on his shoulder. “Thank you Buck.”
They sat in a comfortable silence for a while, just comfortable being near each other. Bucky was the first to break the silence. “Did you leave Bruce hanging?”
“Yeah.” Y/N giggled. “Friday!’ She called.
“Yes Miss Y/N?”
“Can you please let Bruce know I won’t be back tonight. But I will start watching Downton Abbey with him soon.”
“Yes Miss Y/N.”
“You should go back and see him. Bruce will be waiting.”
“Yeah. But I’m thinking a night in, just us, ordering food and watching whatever we want.” She got her phone and opened the delivery app. “What are you thinking?”
“Whatever you want.”
“Greek?!” She asked immediately.
“Greek it is!” Bucky laughed as she placed the order. “What brought this on?” Bucky whispered.
Y/N shrugged. “I’m just really comfortable right now.” She lifted her head, her hand resting on Bucky’s cheek as she turned his face. Her lips pressed against his in a tentative kiss.
Bucky froze before melting into her, his arms resting in her hips, afraid to press any further. The nerves in his stomach giving way to excitement. He wanted this, craved her completely.
Turning her head Y/N deepened the kiss, her hands raking through his hair as she held on. Licking his bottom lip she smirked when he opened his mouth, delighting the way he tasted. “Fuck that’s what I’ve been missing?” She asked breathless as her fingers were still in his hair.
Bucky smirked, satisfaction filling his senses. “Glad to see it was worth the wait.” He pecked her lips as he ran his fingers up her arms. “You ok?”
“Yeah.” She giggled. “Yeah I am.” She detached herself from his arms, Making to lay on the bed. She patted the spot next to her, eager to have him near.
He crawled into the bed, laying on his back with his arm out. He was pleasantly surprised when she laid next to him, her head laying on his chest. His arm circled her waist, holding her close.
“Can you…” She stumbled before asking. “Can you sleep here, with me tonight? Like right next to me?”
Bucky stiffened. He thought he had hot gold with the kiss. Now she was asking him to sleep next to her. He had no idea what he had done to deserve it. “Are you sure?” He whispered. He needed to make sure. This was a huge step forward for her. God knows he didn’t want to screw it up or make her feel uncomfortable.
“Yeah.” She nodded. “I mean I’m not ready to have sex yet.”
“Which is off the table until you are ready.” Bucky added.
“But..” She continued as she smirked at his response. “I think it would be nice to wake up with you here. Right next to me.”
“As long as you are sure.” He kissed her forehead. “What are we watching?”
“Princess Bride!” She exclaimed as she grabbed the remote. “Best night ever.” She whispered into his shirt.
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