Tumgik
#very bad jokes
Text
drinking my good son juice
my father’s etsy shop dedicated to dad joke merchandise. check it out to make an old man happy
3 notes · View notes
franeridart · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
more dragon
14K notes · View notes
iztea · 5 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
if you know the reference I'm giving you a cookie
4K notes · View notes
live-from-flaturn · 1 year
Text
American Television after 5 years of pushing for queer representation: I hope you wanted unnecessary drama, angst with a maybe resolution, and three unfulfilling seasons of questionably written flirtation. And that all comes before anything is half-confirmed with a singular lukewarm kissing scene between two conventionally attractive, white bisexual women!
Thai Television .3 seconds after they figured out queer content is marketable: Did you want something kinky, soft, or stupid? Did you want cat ears? We’ve got cat ears! We’ve got safe/sane/consensual OR off-the-charts bad etiquette BDSM. We’ve got college students out the ass! As long as they’re an engineer or architect, choose your flavor. Do you want an age gap or classmates? Something for adults? Teens? Everyone was childhood besties, how about that??? This is a short order restaurant and I will flip you some gays like they’re hotcakes, just tell me what you want.
4K notes · View notes
egophiliac · 7 months
Note
I love the idea of teenage Malleus hating his new baby brother Silver but slowly falling for him
words cannot express how much I adore that Mal's reaction to seeing a human baby for the first time was "the fuck is this. why does it look like that. gross." (then he immediately got stuck on babysitting duty and the rest is history)
I am SUCH a sucker for that trope of "non-humans being fascinated by normal human behavior", so between that and all the delicious angst going on I was eating VERY well. >:) Malleus being so impressed that two-year-old Silver can walk, because it took him twenty years to stand on two legs! Lilia barging in on the Zigvolts at 2 AM being like "he won't stop crying what do I do"! Lilia trying to feed Silver rats and Malleus being like "...please just stick with what the books say to feed it"! it is all so. chef's kiss.
Tumblr media
2K notes · View notes
nyancrimew · 6 months
Text
if you wanna stall a cop you can just keep running in circles, they have to follow behind you and can't cut you off since that would be considered predictive policing
1K notes · View notes
bloobydabloob · 1 month
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I’ve been thinking about country based things way too much recently… you can tell. I wanna raaangeee liiiifee.
442 notes · View notes
ranarenee · 2 months
Text
Tumblr media
Lol when your cool ancestor is hella dead.
428 notes · View notes
Text
Supernatural, the longest queer bait, has struck again
15K notes · View notes
vandersprodigy18 · 9 months
Text
I love The Shrugs ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ right before the Imodna Kiss cos it implies that Laura (and Marisha) was just as shocked as the rest of us. It implies that Laura was NOT in the driver’s seat when “Can I kiss you??” was blurted out of her own mouth but was instead Possessed™️ by the Purple-haired Horse Girl and she was like. oh i guess this is what the person in my head wants to do? Guess i better do it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i do not control the imogen lmao
978 notes · View notes
bumnyv · 2 months
Text
you remember this in blood of olympus right
299 notes · View notes
samglyph · 13 days
Text
I truly believe Will Wood is an incredible musician and songwriter and is one of the top lyricists in the last decade both in and outside of the genres that he chooses to play in with absolutely zero irony. I also believe that you can only fully understand that if you’ve either had a pet die before listening to his music or you have a history of drug abuse and mental health crises. Or you’re trans.
199 notes · View notes
coolnonsenseworld · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Samurai and Ninja in crappy pics because December here is under a constant cloud and I just want y'all to see them all golden and cute without learning how to take aesthetic pictures 🥴 💙❤️😆🥰
linktr.ee/Mezzy
315 notes · View notes
toodrunktofindaurl · 9 months
Photo
Tumblr media
here, have this shitpost here too
602 notes · View notes
lokh · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
mom avoids dead anime mom curse because he transitions. he’s always had a complicated relationship with pregnancy because of how woefully little people are told about potential complications and aftercare, and also because of how gendered it is, so after the birth of his second child he’s finally had it and decides to transition
he joins a local community group for mothers and at first it’s played for laughs how often they fall to the dead mom curse, but soon we find out more about how society has failed mothers and people who give birth, from information being withheld, procedures being carried out without consent, lack of accommodations and maternal and paternal leave, racism…
it also turns out that becoming a man doesn’t help with this, not really, because being a pregnant trans man brings its own problems. follow along as he learns more about being a parent and a mother, and maybe even… finding love???
coming to you never because I can’t write!
435 notes · View notes
royalarchivist · 22 days
Text
Fit: You know... There's a reason I'm a loner, that I'm a nomad, that I go from place to place. 'Cuz everywhere I go, people die. Fit: I'm just- I'm a walking bad omen.
I know Fit probably said this as a joke and it wasn't meant to be that deep, but I've got a shovel and I'm ready to dig, because this comment fits his QSMP cubito way too well.
Tumblr media
[ Subtitle Transcript ↓ ]
Fit: I had nothing to do with any of this! I had nothing to do with any of this! [He notices the Allays trapped in a room and gasps] Ohhh– C'mon, get out of here– You're gonna burn to death! Get out of here.
Fit: This is why I don't walk into churches. This is why I don't walk into churches, for this reason. You know– 'cuz it- it would just burn down. It would just burn down if I walked right in. This is what happens. I'm an unholy man.
[The sound of villagers dying]
Fit: Oh yeah, they're all dead. They're f- they're doomed. They are DOOMED.
Dono: You showed up and the mansion burned itself down, made a crack about never walking into churches, then thunder happened? Your manifestation skills are too damn high dude.
Fit: You know– ok, I'm a little cursed. I'm a little cursed, as you can clearly see. You know... There's a reason I'm a loner, in Minecraft, that I'm a nomad, that I go from place to place. 'Cuz everywhere I go, people die. Ehh... you know? I'm just- I'm a walking bad omen. I'm a walking bad omen. Look at this sht. It's- it- ugh...
Fit: These things happen.
157 notes · View notes