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#ventsesh
vegasgirlvlogs · 1 year
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I don't feel like sharing with anyone IRL
But finally starting to get some bit of treatment and help for some of my reproductive issues. I was diagnosed with PCOS last week at my Obgyn. Idk how to feel. I don't fall under most of the categories (facial hair, high test, insulin resistance, high a1c, blood oressure, thyroid issues or hormonal imbalances.) I have perfect vitals as far as all of this goes. Only symptoms are cystic ovaries and currently my left ovary is full of cysts, low vitamin D, low iron. I get bleeding and pain in-between my heavy periods. So much that I have low iron even after infusions and I faint during my cycle from the pain.
I hate not being able to see the raw data for all the exams i had to take (CT scan, internal ultrasound, pap, and like 12 dif blood tests). As a stem student I'm like wtf. I'm sure I could request it...? But then what would I do? Idk.
The only help I've been offered is the repetitive "yeah that's normal for PCOS" and "we recommend birth control"
Why? Why birth control? So i can end up with more health issues after a prolonged use of BC? B.C won't cure whatever is going on, it's a literal bandaid...
Just bleh.
Dear Diarrhea for sure.
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msjahrastafari · 3 years
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Update.
Aloha tumblr! It’s been a while since I’ve been on here, so here’s what’s been goin on ….
I’m currently working at Office Depot, been there about 3 years now. I’ve also been usin Monat since Oct 2020 so almost a year, I actually had upgraded and joined the business side to it which has been nothing but a blessing- it honestly has changed my life. Not with just my hair and skin, but also with me whole being. It has changed the way I think, it’s given me a whole other look of things and had given me a community of likeminded individuals. Since joinin, I’ve met SOO much women and men locally and in the states as well as Canada. Most times we’re online, whether it be on Zoom, on ig, or in our WhatsApp chat. Anyways, without me givin this a chance and taking that leap of faith I wouldn’t have the things I do now, as well as the knowledge I’ve learned. But yeah, startin my own business in Dec 2020 definitely was a wise choice I made and I welcome anyone else whose been thinkin about joining or want to learn more about the bizz or what I have to offer. If you do, and you’re serious about it then just send me a quick message. 😊❤️
My love life……
I am now a girlfriend y’all !! Cheehuuuu! Haha, I’ve always wanted to find someone but someone who wanted the same things that I do. The one who wants to date to marry, and end up making generations and generations. Someone who also smokes as much as me, but also someone whose hungry to make money so that we don’t have to struggle in the future and right now. Someone who doesn’t only want sex, ya know? But I found him, and I’m grateful. I wouldn’t want it any other way, being with him is one of my highlights of 2021. So yeah, I ain’t lettin him go no freakin way lol (I’m serious and he knows that)
Congrats! You’ve made it to the end, I hope you have a great evening or morning depending where you’re at. Thanks for reading what I’ve got to say and what’s been goin on I guess lol
Sendin nothing but LUV + POSITIVE VIBES ❤️❤️
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nightmarewishes · 4 years
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I really hate idle time. especially when I’m powering through a black episode. every second that passes, I swear the voices get louder and begin to overlap.
I read an article about how people think and how some people don’t have the inner monologue that we have. I ended up talking to an old friend, she shared an article that said very few individuals can have multiple “inner monologues”. I thought that was normal. to have more than one. I guess it’s not. or maybe i’m that crazy?
wouldn’t I be crazy, though? to have multiple voices inside my head but they’re all pieces of me. similar to that episode from Teen Titans (huge fan btw) where you meet all of Raven’s pieces/emotions/other physical selves?
I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to find enjoyment in life. I wish I didn’t get so bored. I wish the memories didn’t destroy me. I wish I could sleep. I wish happiness wasn’t so fleeting and that the darkness wasn’t so...empty. I wish I wasn’t given this life and I would never wish my life on another but - I wish it hadn’t of been an option. do you ever feel that?
the weight of your demons whispering over your shoulder? their voice so similar to your own and their screams cause a lack of slumber. eventually there isn’t a acceptable distinguish between their shrieks of laughter and your own wails of anguish. so much pain lays itself beneath the layers of your skin and wonder why I didn’t spent most of my life trying to cut it out. mutilating myself in an attempt to just make the pain stop because I didn’t know how to do anything. I was never taught love. or compassion. or kindness. I wasn’t shown how to express oneself or even how to cope with feelings. I was taught anger before love. that shit fucks with your head and yet you dare question my sanity?
and the voices... they’re my own. so maybe I should question my sanity.
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Modest Shaming
So last weekend it was homecoming. Normally at homecoming people do nasty stuff with each other: like grinding and kissing. Its nasty because most of them don’t know who they’re doing it with. But anyway this girl on my bus talks to me sometimes. we’ll call her Rylie. Rylie and I started talking about homecoming and how we had fun. Then she started talking about how she was grinding the whole time. Then Rylie asked if I grinned with anyone. I said no because I didn’t. I just wanted to have fun with my friends. Then (this is the part that got me shook) she gasps really loud says something like wow no action. And because Rylie never shuts up she keeps saying stuff like that. she said stuff like your so childish, your no fun, and the worst one does no one like you or something. I just sat there in disbelieve like how could you be so rude about something so dumb. Then she goes on to talk about how some guy grabbed her butt. Rylie was going on and on and all I could think is, is she slut shaming me but the other way around. like she’s the slut telling me to stop being modest. Modest shaming? Well sorry for trying to be school appropriate. This happened on what Tuesday. today is Thursday. She still talks to me about her relationships. They really aren't romantic or anything special. They all end the same way her getting board and her dumping the boy. I feel bad for them, the boys, she hardcore leads them on. she said that she sent bra pics to one boy and a week or 2 later she dumped him. Like what? that is so rude. But keep in mind that she only talks to me about school, until homecoming. Thanks for reading if you read it. If you didn’t read your not missing out. I just needed to vent.
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peachbonnie · 4 years
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Vents,When I’m Mad....
Random Ocs
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blackribbonsociety · 5 years
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Happy Hour @belltown_pub with @terri_petitsgateaux ! YASS! #YassFriends #WorkCopingPals #LIFEcopingPals #VentSesh #ApplePieMule #HappyHour #Belltown #BelltownPub (at Belltown Pub) https://www.instagram.com/p/BvVPiHHnG3A/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1cdx3c1j0edfs
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whitneyraed · 4 years
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Care About Others BUT, Put Yourself First #VentSesh
#VentSesh, don't care too much about others. Care about yourself and put yourself first! Surround yourself with good people. Only then you will be happiest -
I care a lot, a lot about other people. I think almost too much, as I haven’t been caring about myself much lately… I’ve been putting everyone else’s priorities before mine; and their happiness before mine. Which now, is hurting me more than ever. (SOMETHING NO-ONE SHOULD DO.)
I’ve been caring TOO much what others think of me or if i’ll let others down, and give them a reason to talk bad about…
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itzjhay · 4 years
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vent-
my bfff asked me to come thru to socal bc she said she needed me to be here. From the get go I told her that I was unemployed and had no typa funds so idk how I would pay for anything. She was hella like no no dude its okay and ill talk to your parents, so she swooped me from our hometown the last week of may with her quarantboo. i told her I would drive halfway and she was lowkey upset so by the time we were 40 miles away she was like can we buy alc. so im like okiiii so her boo and her bought alc, like within 15 mins home girl finished a whole bottle of Malibu to herself. Maybe like 30 mins later shes like jai I have to pee and her boo was like nah nah keep driving and im like nah if she has to pee its okiii so we pulled to the side of the road and homegirl blacked tf out while her boo was helping her boo and she started hella yackinnnn. And so we had to fix her throw up and so basically she was booty cheek ass naked and mind you its freaking broad daylight so im like telling her boo hurry we have to haul ass so this doesnt look sus. Long story short, I drove the entire way, paid for gas and paid for food while she was blacked out and her boo was in the back with her
We got to her brothers place in la and she was still hungover asf and didnt remember shit. She fell asleep while showering. And like the next day I was so dead from the drive and shes like cleaning and I asked her if she needed help. And shes like no im okay. So I go ahead and start packing bc she got a place in lb so we were leaving her brothers apt. and then we get to lb and her mans was going to come over and I told her hey if he is going to come over can he at least bring water bc we have no typa groceries. And shes like omg no thats embarrassing and im like oh okay and then he comes thru and she tells him how I haven’t done shit and she cleaned the whole place and how she paid for the place in lb and I was like damn thats a slap across the face bc i told you my situation from the get go lol so then like I just mind my business and then im like she makes it seem like Im not going to help out so like the next day I spend $500 in groceries, and her and her boo aint say shit or say thank you or anything
Then like im like okay thats fine, at least i am able to contribute in some way so I end up being cleaning lady, cooking lady, house lady bc I felt like damn im living here for free lemme at least try and help in someway. But homegirl has a problem where she blacks the fuck out and doesnt remember when shes drinking. So the same day I got groceries and she was in class and her boo was having people over and he was drinking and they got into a fight bc she felt fomo, so this girl drinks two trulys and she is alrdy fucked the fuck up and he gives her two shots of henny and she yacks, and I have to clean it and calm her down, and I tell her boo to bring her to the bathroom pls while I clean her yack and shes like going off on him in the bathroom and his friends are like okii I think we need to leave and her boo is like no no its coo and they’re like nah dude yall should handle that and so shes in the bathroom and shes like cussing him out but I didnt know bc I was clean up crew, and she goes off for like a half hour and half until she passes out booty cheek ass naked in the shower, her boo probably walked out like thirty minutes ago and so I checked up on him and hes like I cant handle that disrespect ya feel me and hes like I applaud you for being able to be so calm and so then I was his therapist/counselor and by that time it was like 2-3am so I told him ima call it a night and if he needs anything to wake me
Apparently I was passed the fuck out so he didnt wake me up but homegirl yacked on him and peed so he had to handle that alone and didnt sleep until like 5am and im like omg shiiii and then its like 6:30am and she comes to my room hella crying and im like omg what happened are you okay and shes like what did I do I dont remember what happened so I told her and shes like omg im so embarrassed and thats so bad and im like yeah dude you were cussing him out and went off on him and shes like I think hes mad at me I dont want him to leave me and im like nah dude I dont think hes going to leave you but I think you should let him sleep bc he hasn’t slept at all and shes hella persistent like no I want and need to talk to him and im like dude you have class soon you have to focus on that we’ll handle it later and I go talk to her boo and hes like over it but then eventually they make up bc I was like mediator and shit
Then it happens the next day where she gets fucked up over like three trulys and shes like in the tub again yacking and throwing a fit at him and hes like honestly I dont want to deal with this disrespect again and im like no I feel it its okay I understand ill handle it… then I am her therapist and counselor and tell her she needs to calm down but I guess she just be internalizing their fights and everything to the next level soooo yeah…. And then like a couple days go by and like its the weekend and I got invited to go to my other friends boyfriends friends graduation party where basically all hell happened….
So basically I got picked up by my other friend and main homegirl and her boo were spending the day together mind you I started drinking by like 2pm and it was probably like 7pm and home girls texts me that shes alone at the park by herself bc they got into something so im like okay come thru and she comes thru and like maybe like 10 mins in she is alrdy fucked up…. And im like laying on the floor chilling and I get up and im like oh fuck where is she and so I find her upstairs with my guy friend and she was alrdy fucked up yacking and he was helping her and im like omg I can handle this and hes like no its okay she needs help and so shes like jai jai call my boo and im like okay okay and so I call her boo and hes like out with his friends and he hangs up and tells me he doesnt want to deal with her disrespect so he’ll let me handle it and im like no worries enjoy your friend time and then she just goes berserk…. She cusses everyone out, she yacks, she goes face first down the stairs, she breaks my friends fan and she was just going off, and instantly kills everyones vibes… and shes like booty cheek ass naked and like thats just hella embarrassing not just to my other friend but to her housemates who own the house, but to like everyone….. and so my friend was like jai she has to go and im like okay but shes fucked up and everyone went to fucked up to sober so fast bc of homegirl… and so I said ill handle it on my own… so I was alone in the bathroom with home girl and she was going off on me and I like broke down and I was so embarrassed bc like I didnt come to socal for this….and eventually me, my friend, her housemate and my guy friend help me bring homegirl home back to our place and I packed all my shit that night while she was passed out… and im like I cant do it this is the last straw…
So Im telling her boo the update and how we are home and she lost her phone and hes like thank you for updating me and I say im packing bc I cant do this anymore and hes like dont leave her youre her rock and im like no im not leaving her but like damn that was just too much for me… and then I wake up at 6am and shes awake and asks what happened and I told her and im in tears and I said ima leave but I didnt and then we get ready to go to church bc her boo was expecting us to go to church and it was hella awkward bc my friend was texting me saying wtf happened and her house mates feel a way and I was trying to move in with them so they’re like questioning me as a person and if im drama bc of how last night turned out …. And pretty much I apologize via text to my friend and her housemates bc that was so embarrassing and they dont really react to what happened or say much. So we went to church and we met her boo and after we get food and it was like an awkward lunch bc her and I get confrontational and her boo was like well you have a wonderful down real ass friend right here and she was like thank you for the intermission but lets go and her boo was like so was this like in one ear and out the other and im like yup and she replies like no I just dont think we can dwell in the past so they decide to go to the mall and im on the phone with my friend and my mom bc im updating them on the shits that happened so then we leave the mall and we drop him off and then her and I drive in silence and go to our rooms and im on the phone with my friend and homegirl goes to sleep in her room and then I check on her and the door is locked so im like okay and then we have to go to pm church and we drive again in silence
And I start having an anxiety/panic attack and so im like dude im not right rn and so I have to collect myself and she doesnt really say much… and then I collect myself then we meet her boo and we go to church and she was like not in the mood but I wanted to do something and her boo and his friends wanted to go to the brewery but then she was like I dont want to be the reason yall dont do anything so lets go but first I need to get my phone, so we stop by my friends place to get homegirls phone and my friend tells homegirl to be mindful next time and everything…. And then thats that and we leave to go meet up at the brewery and I order 3 flights of beer which is like 12 in total LMAO bc it has been A MF DAY and its coo bc she isn’t really down with beer anyways and so we go and then head home and her boo and his friends come over with Seagrams which is like 3% alc and then we are all chilling and shit then his friend asks homegirl for her permission if her boo can go out Friday night for his birthday and shes like why do you need to ask for my permission and so for an hour the friend is trying to convince her to let him go and its in front of everyone and she walks out and were all like oh fucking fuck then her boo comes back and says that she cried it all out and they talked and everything so she comes back and apologizes to the friend and then like we all call it a night
Then like the next day its just like I stay in bed until like 2pm and go back to sleep bc im so tired and then its like 4pm and im like hey can you bring me to my titas in la and her and her boo seemed hella upset bc they were supposed to work out and everything…. But I was like hey I have to go tho bc my tita is waiting for me and she has work and so she drops him off and then drops me off at la and im like hey I wanna say I dont hate you and I am not mad and dont think I am abandoning you and shes like no dude im fine and im over it im never going to see those girls ever again and im sure im out of that housing living situation so dont worry and shes like I told my parents how you and I need space from one another and they were really confused and she was like yeah they’re like but youre so easy going why do yall need space and I laughed and was like yeah youre not easy going when youre drinking and then the rest of the car ride was silent and awkward and I asked her if she needed gas money or anything and shes like no im okay and im fine and then she hella just seemed like she was over it and wanted to rush back to her mans… and I could tell that.. I walked her back to her car and shes like call me if you need anything and im like yeah thank you, take care text me when you get home safe and the 15th is the last time her and I spoke…
I mean I dont expect her to pay me back for groceries or anything, if she wanted to pay me she could have and if she didnt thats okay too I dont expect shit in return yaknooo like thats just me and thats my heart if I am down for you ima just be hella down for you like we’ve been friends since high school yaknoo and like I needed space bc like I didnt come here to be your care giver but dont think I left bc Im over you like yeah I may have been petty and upset but I alrdy know how she is when she gets a mans she forgets me and focuses on the relationship, I appreciate the fact that her mans was okiii with me yaknoo and made that effort and he knows ive only shown goodness to her and to him, I know there is something deeper within her I could tell when she came back to cali and when I saw her in feb she wasn’t okay, I told her I dont think shes mentally stable and I broke down saying I really dont know who she is when shes drunk and shes looking to fill the void that she feels and how she cant push me and him away when we are trying to be there for her I mean if anything I helped her be able to communicate with him a whole lot better yet she didnt communicate anything with me except her relationship and feels she has for him, i guess it just sucks bc like I never knew that we’d end up like this lol she still views my ig stories and has my location I think its kinda funny bc like I honestly really came here because of her and for her yaknoo and I texted her around 7pm today and like I know she saw my text and she just didnt react to it and I know shes home so idk dude
A part of me feels stupid bc its like why am I so down for people I love, yet its like damn I didnt know I had to question whether or not youre as down for me *kanye shrugs* maybe my heart really be so damn big and forgiving, I feel the tears in my eyeballs wanting to flow out I guess I didnt realize how much it hurts me til right now lol
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The Friend Diaries.
Have you ever had any friends?
Me? Sometimes I had friends, but they always feel so different than me. I’ve always tried my best to impress, to make them like me, but now those friends are no longer around. I guess I can’t really have any friends or have we always been strangers?
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Sometimes I wish I could escape work for just two days.
No emails.
No texts.
No looming lists of things I should have already done but my boss said to take a weekend and not do it.
Nothing.
Especially since this is the last day to myself I’ll have for two weeks.
Le sigh.
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re6el6uti6n · 4 years
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✒🎸🎙VICTIM PRIVILEGE (BABY ABRASIONS)🎙🎸✒ Pt.6 #original #song #singer #songwriter #new #ventsesh #victim #privilege #baby #abrasions #ソング #歌 #歌曲 #ਗਾਣਾ #chanson #गाना #cubestreet #песня #granite #vavashland #acoustic #guitar #lied #canción #vavashla #indie #rock #blues #folk (at Greenbank, Queensland, Australia) https://www.instagram.com/p/CDhlOuZjep3/?igshid=l1grddintqt3
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nightmarewishes · 4 years
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I ended up driving back home (400 miles away from where I currently live) so I could see my boo. (it was very much needed.) I also stopped by one of my best friend’s places. I told her about my boo and she noticed a difference in me. she said she was so sorry for not noticing how bad I was getting last year (my physical, mental, emotional health). she told me I look so much better, how fucking good my laugh sounded, how I smiled more - she told me recovery is her favorite look of mine and tbh, I’m so thankful for the few people I have.
I know I’m insanely difficult, I am constantly teetering between feeling as if the world is mine to explore and as if I am the dust being propelled throughout this life. one second, I feel capable. I feel strong, confident, sexy, brave. sometimes, I feel soft. I want to be someone’s warmth. I want to be their rock. and then the memories hit. I’m so tired of constantly suffocating underneath the weight of my pain.
I don’t know if I’ll ever recover completely. sometimes, I wonder if this is as good as it gets. yet, within the next breath I wouldn’t mind this being as good as it gets. because it’s better than it was.
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zo3samantha · 5 years
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It’s a battle to stay present. I want to be positive and high vibing, but to try is to fail. I don’t want to sit in negativity and heaviness, but to try not to is, again, failure. My mind spins so fast and it’s so difficult to maintain a balance. I’m struggling today, so bad, and I feel so guilty about it... then I realize that I shouldn’t be feeling guilty... and then I’m overwhelmed by my own overanalysis... and the cycle goes on. If I could just switch my brain off for even a second, it’d be such a relief.
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theclosetratchet · 6 years
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I’m having a very irritating day. #ventsesh https://www.instagram.com/p/Bl6hyHYhrYR/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=wvj2skjva3w1
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olympappclub · 6 years
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👋 Friends! Please give 💓 an advice to the 😔 person in this ☔ situation. Repost this or click here and download app! Perhaps thanks to you there is a solution!
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orchidehtaghdir · 7 years
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Just read it.
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