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#unspoken thoughts
hiraya-manawari-iddu · 4 days ago
To my young E(n)d,
You are loved. You will be loved and you will love. Despite how many times you curse love over empty beer cans, swollen eyes and haunting happy memories.
At times, you will have this eargerness to scream and scream at the top of your lungs. It will feel like you have lost your voice. You will find yourself choking at those unspoken feelings and unheard voice. But Love, as you traverse these vast uncertainities, your voice will come along. And you will be heard, the way you hear others. Even in your silence and in your most chaotic state, you will be heard. You will be understood.
You will have sleepless nights. You will be anxious about the future. Like what if you will not wake up tomorrow ( you might find your self awake until dawn). You will think about the things you did in the past. Note: some will make you cringe and laugh. Flashbacks of regrets will bother you and will make you doubt yourself. What if's before bed time are deadly and insane, yet what can we do? It's the best time to do so.
In the midst of this chaos, you will eventually find your peace. Your calm in your storm. And you will be able to sleep soundly until it pass. Warm and safe.
You will be a traveler. Wondering every street of unknowns, you will be both in happy and scary places. Hellos and goodbyes will be bitter sweet. There are people you are fated to meet. You will be with them until they reach their destinations. And you, Love, will continue your adventure. You will somehow get lost, but dont be afraid you will find your way back.
I can tell that you will question your journey, like "whaaaat? what now? what am I supposed to do? What am I looking for? What am I searching?"
You will be looking for lotssss of things. You will be searching for love, for friendship, for something fun and daring. And most of all, you will be actually looking for a home. A safe haven, a place where you can be yourself. Because you will get tired of walking and walking endlessly.
But Love, home can be a person, can be built, sometimes it will be temporary and you will be asked to leave or you will leave. And most of all, Home is you. Just as how eager you are to seek shelter, you have to understand that you can be a home too. There is someone out there who wants your warmth, the sense of security and belongingness you give. Some one out there wants to come home to you and whisper "I am home" with a smile and tight warm hug - so warm it will melt your worries away. But still, it is up to you. I wonder what will you choose. Will you welcome someone home? Or will you be the one waiting at the doorstep to welcome some one home?
To my young E(n)d, life will get hard and not everyone will be at your side. There will be times where even your closest friends/ family will see the world differently from you and you will feel shaken. The ground on which you stand seems to tremble and your footing is suddenly unsure. To be able to understand why this happens and why it has to happen will keep your feet rooted firmly to the ground.
I love you and I am proud of who you were, and who you will be.
See you soon,
Your old beginning
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cerealmonster15 · 5 days ago
my ask box: specifically says  for people to put *p for private reply
literally everyone that sends me off anon asks: never do that, implying they dont mind/maybe even specifically want a published reply and would probs just send a chat DM or say something if they really wanted privacy
me, regardless: ok but what if they are expecting me to answer this privately. what if i publish this ask and they get upset and i die immediately. i better answer privately just in case-
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hiraya-manawari-iddu · 7 days ago
"maybe in the after life"
"maybe in the alternate universe"
"maybe someday we will meet again"
Maybe we like these idea so much, that we got lost in the false hope it gives. Maybe that is the reason why most people dont live their lives today, because they know that there will always be a tomorrow. Maybe that is why we are comfortable of wasting opportunities thinking there will be more. Just like how we lost our chance for we belived that this time ain't for us. Just like how I watch every people I hold dear slip into my hands like sands slowly becoming one with the wind. I, We took things for granted.
But I realized, what if... what if the time we said not ours was the only time we are meant to meet? What if after life is not true and alternate universe does not exist?
TOMORROW is a promise that will never be fullfilled. It is just always coming, but it never came. Just like you.
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abreathlessword · 8 days ago
There is a star in the sky for every thought I’ve had of you, and every thought to come. The shooting stars are the highlights. The nights that I think about every night, and probably will every night to come. When I look closely I can see them all aligning. I can feel your hands in my hair. Thank god the clouds hide the sky from time to time.
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shiroolynn · 14 days ago
As I was driving back home from Budapest today, following an audi on the highway with my little ass opel corsa, I realized that this is a perfect metaphor for me trying to catch up with the athletes of the big ski jumping nations kshsj like they have all the advantage in every aspect/quality material,money../ . And then here’s me, with my 15 years old 1.2 corsa trying to keep up with them lol
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imgettingflabbybaby · 15 days ago
Concept: having a bunch of feedist friends and organising time to hang out with all of them, one by one (or in little groups) throughout the week. Doesn't even need to go anywhere sexual - although having a partner to come home to would be ideal - but I really like the idea of spending time with people you care about, doing fun activities, or just catching up and doing nothing, and yet the whole time, each and every one of them enables and encourages you to eat until you're beyond full. Ordering too much at a cafe, grabbing snacks while you wander through town, eating while you hang and play videogames. No matter what you do, or who you do it with, they'll make sure your belly stays nice and full constantly. In time, this will become your new normal... 💕
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hiraya-manawari-iddu · 16 days ago
I love sitting here, beside my window feeling the summer night breeze. I like how it blows away my queries, and how it replaces it with new thoughts. Sometimes I like to think that these thoughts are like dandelion seeds carried by wind to me, plants it in me then wait for it to bloom. Words whispered by strangers to the wind, hoping it would reach whoever they are thinking.
I wish, miles from me, someone is sitting outside feeling the wind. And I hope my words lands on its garden.
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hiraya-manawari-iddu · 17 days ago
I feel like a fallen log
In the bosom of the river
Till I reach rock bottom
Dark, cold, and silent
But I guess it's better
Than standing under the heat of the sun.
With the deafening sound of the surroundings.
There is peace in solitude.
I found something in the middle of nothing
I am now here in nowhere.
And I,
I will probably stay at the bottom.
Until time has petrified my fragile soul.
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capetowncapers · 22 days ago
At the end of the day, being in a relationship kind of just means choosing someone you trust so deeply that you’ll let them know you better than anyone else does.
And yes blah blah blah that’s lovely and brings with it so many soft intimacies but more importantly it also means that dating someone often means they’ll read you like a fucking book and it’s so funny sometimes
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november-rage · 22 days ago
isn't it a wonder that there are merely 26 alphabets and we can literally make any combinations and describe our feelings, emotions, play with them, sing them, in whatever way we want? it's like, we are the protagonist, and we have the weapon, and someone has whispered in our ears " Darling, go create worlds."
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theeusexmachina · 23 days ago
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//Darling, I know you are already exhausted fighting your battles. But let me tell you this, the battle is not yet over because there’s still a lot of growing and blooming to do. The battle is not yet over because you have not won yet. So keep fighting and continue to raise your sword.
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