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millerbrick · 2 years

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No one is so brave that he is not disturbed by something unexpected.

October 109.

When Nettie Paine’s heart finally gave out, nobody was surprised. She had been ill for the better part of the year, and without access to the necessary care and medication, she had already lasted longer than most people thought she would. At least she was not alone. Her daughter, son, daughter-in-law, and two grandsons were by her bedside when her last breath finally wafted away. It was almost like they knew. Maybe they did, given her rapid decline in the past few days.

Barric was 8 years old, and his grandmother’s was the first death he had ever witnessed.

His father dug the grave himself the next morning. The funeral was a short and sombre affair, during which Barric spent all of 30 minutes clutching his mother’s skirt with shaky fists. Kelby told him to ‘stop being such a child’ when the adults were looking the other way. Barric did not get it. He was a child, wasn’t he? Why should he stop being one?

When it was time for the adults to say their final goodbyes, his father spoke first. “It is easier to find those who will volunteer to die, than to find those who are willing to endure pain with patience,” Bran Paine sniffled. He went on then, about how his mother had endured her pain in patience, and about how she was now at peace and no longer suffering.

Not two weeks later, Barric had already forgotten the simple but heartfelt speech—except for the very beginning of it. Only that first sentence stuck. Even when he had forgotten the context, even when he had forgotten it was his father whom he had first heard it from, even though he was not entirely sure what it meant.

It is easier to find those who will volunteer to die, than to find those who are willing to endure pain with patience.

January 113.

Barric's first reaping day was cold, too cold. He did not want to go to the town centre. He did not even want to step out of the house. Kelby once again called him a coward or a baby or something to that effect, but he did not even hear it. He did not even care.

“Come on, Barric,” his mother sighed. “Put your shirt on, we have to go now. Lavender’s probably already there waiting for you.” When Barric did not respond, she tried again. “I know you’re scared, but I promise you, you won’t get picked. Your name is in there once.”

“I could,” Barric countered, a little petulantly.

“You won’t.” His mother picked his shirt off the floor and draped it over his shoulders. “Men worry more about what they can’t see than about what they can. Have you ever heard that before? What I’m saying is you shouldn’t worry about what you think might happen, especially something you wouldn’t be able to change anyway. And maybe worry a little more about the peacekeepers who will definitely kick down our door if we don’t register at the reaping on time.”

The words were spoken gently and with kindness, the only way Georgia Paine could speak, but they still sent a chill down his spine. Barric realised then how stupid he was being. He had been too focused on what might happen, too afraid of possibly getting reaped, he forgot there were other, more immediate dangers to worry about. Besides, it was not like he could actually run away from the reaping. Even if he somehow managed to skip this one, there would still be another next year, then another, then another.

“Might as well get it over with, yeah?” His mother confirmed his own train of thought.

Finally, he nodded. At least he would not be alone. At least Lavender would be beside him every year, until they grew old enough to become ineligible. As he buttoned up his best shirt, Barric repeated his mother’s words to himself, knowing they would linger at the back of his mind from that day onward.

Men worry more about what they can’t see than about what they can.

September 113.

Everyone said Hudson Parish was a nightmare. Barric believed it, but it was not until his third day of work that he saw it with his own eyes. Nobody lived up to—and even surpassed—their reputation quite the way Hudson did.

“I swear I weighed that sheaf twice, Hud. Like you told me to,” pleaded Rye, a worker a handful of years older than Barric.

“You calling me a liar?” Hudson took a step closer towards Rye, then another, then another. “Is that it? You’re saying that shit’s actually twenty pounds, and that I lied?”

“N-no. I’m just s-” But Rye did not get to finish saying his piece before Hudson punched him in the jaw, hard. The teenager wailed in pain as he staggered backwards.

“You, new kid,” Hudson called, nodding to the side. “Get that sheaf back on the scale and tell me what it says.”

Barric tried not to shake as he rolled the sheaf forward. Fear might be misconstrued for reluctance, and that would only bode him ill. When the display on the scale finally settled on a number, he swallowed; relieved that he did not have to disagree with Hudson, sorry that he could not help Rye. But his heart did not stop hammering against his chest, fear and confusion stirring cold to the tips of his fingers.

When he spoke, his voice trembled. “Eighteen and a half.”

“Speak up,” Hudson snapped.

Barric told him again, but evidently still not loud and clear enough for his liking.

“Fucking useless.” Hudson shoved him aside by the shoulder, the assault sudden and anticipated all at once. Barric let out an involuntary yelp when he hit the ground. “Eighteen and a half,” Hudson then announced. “Not fucking twenty!”

More punches, a couple of kicks, and then Rye was on the ground. Barric did not want to look, while at the same time could not look away. He was also still on the ground, too afraid to get up, as if staying down would make him invisible somehow.

Once satisfied with the state of Rye, Hudson turned around, narrowing his eyes at Barric again. “Take a look at this piece of shit, kid.” He gestured at Rye, who was still spitting out blood. “I hope you can learn from this, yeah? From this… experience. You know what they say, experience is the teacher of all things, isn’t it? Or do you need to experience it yourself?”

Barric quickly shook his head.

Unfortunately, he did end up experiencing Hudson’s fist for himself not long after, then many more times after that. But that day was permanently etched in his memory, along with the violent supervisor’s words.

Experience is the teacher of all things.

July 121.

Two consecutive cannons not a second apart marked the deaths of both District 9 tributes. Gasps were heard across the town centre, though everyone was frozen in place. As if the sky would crumble over them, too, if they so much as made a move. As if their tributes ever had a chance in the first place.

Kelby Paine stared unblinking at the projector screen. He saw this coming, he told himself. If he was a betting man, he would have bet against Barric. Contrary to popular belief, he did not hate his half-brother, but he was also not dumb. Hadn’t he always said that the boy would get himself killed following the Hardsnow girl around, one way or another?

This was not a surprise. It should not be. So why did his legs shake when he tried to stand up?

Someone offered their condolences, but Kelby barely heard them. Instead, he heard his last conversation with Barric, just before the boy’s departure to the Capitol, playing over and over in his head now.

“I can't tell you everything, but I wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for her,” Barric had told him. “She's all I got. What would you have me do?”

“Not volunteer for the fucking Hunger Games, how about that? Everyone wondered where you disappeared to. Now you showed your face, only to disappear again for good this time? But you know what? I'm not surprised. You've always been so fucking stupid.”

But Barric had not seemed to believe him, or even hear him. “Remember that thing grandma used to say?” the boy had said instead, a tired smile on his face. “I think it’s from a story or something. No one is so brave that he is not disturbed by something unexpected.”

#and that's a wrap! on him and on the caesar quotes!#self para #128 #tw: death #tw: violence

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jverd · 7 years

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hey great so in case everyone FORGOT about my characters.......... heres some info so have fun

JAERD ALANIZ (alberto rosende) doesnt know abt u but hes feeling 22. my nerd child who, in another life, lived 4 murder. except in this one hes just an annoying know it all who loves/is deathly afraid of ghosts. hes a librarian so catch him boring children with useless facts while shelving books mmk! hes too smart 2 have sex and also thinks love is fake so catch u on the flipside

LEAF MCCRAE (steven strait) is grumpy mcgrumpster slash derek hale incarnate. he inherited the ownership of Our Bookshop from his foster dad who, tragically, DIED but also left leaf some MONEY!!! so anyone who works at the bookstore probably thinks hes an asshole bc, u know, he is. i forgot to mention the most important #fact which is that leaf is from scotland so u best BET he has a nice lil accent. anyways, his sights r usually set on unobtainable men and women, so theres that

MARSHALL “MOOSH” ACOSTA (tyler posey) is the LIGHT OF MY GOD DAMN LiFE!!! when hes not working as a bartender at joe’s pub he’s driving his OWN ice cream truck around thru the neighborhoods . yeah. he owns an ice cream truck. hes a literal golden retriever puppy dog and lovs people and hes pretty fuckin dumb but he does his best. he lost his whole fam damily in a car accident except his dad who got the hell out of dodge when his wife died and moosh hasnt seen him in years. whatacock

KELBY STARK (froy gutierrez) is the Good Christian Boy in the Good Christian Suburbs. except he aint that big a fan of je-suis so whatever. he lives with his alcoholic/physically abuse father so hes fuckn never home. hes smart like that, u know. he works at the eclipse pourin popcorn and poppin diet coke bottles. hes p quiet and to himself but hes a sweetums. also hes Very gay but , that term ? a homo ? unfamiliar to him. its fine he’ll figure it out someday.

anyways its been 4 years since ive been active so hmu for connections and all that nonsense

#bitches better talk to me #i will b active i PROMISESESE

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thewolfamongussy · 7 years

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4 & 28~!

thabk u kelby im lov u

4. A character you rarely talk about?There is A LOT of OCs that I never really mention. Some of them I don’t mention cus they’re the children of canon characters x my other OCs that I made while I was in the depths of OC Hell™ and I feel like too much of a trashcan to talk about them rip lmao. But here’s a few I’ve never talked about:

-Townes (Lone Wanderer): I might have mentioned him a few times. He’s my trash self-insert #1. He’s really fucking gay for Butch Deloria and doesn’t know wtf he’s doing most of the time. Dark mysterious pretty boy with a lot of snarky remarks.

-Brooks Shepard: Trash self-insert #2. (His name is almost a goddamn translation of my Chinese birthname) He’s a good dude who wants to save the universe but if he needs to use his Hero Charm™, he ain’t got none. He can only point guns at people and Yell. He’s also really fucken gay.

28. Your most dangerous OC? Will Shepard for sure. Military training, strong biotic powers and ruthless af. They’re goddamn Commander Shepard ffs. Though they’re a good person no matter how angry they are. The OC that will probably blow up your entire town and murder everyone is Miss Atomic Bomb.

#condvit #asks #oc tag #rhys townes #brooks shepard #will shepard #miss atomic bomb (oc)

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boo1a4 · 7 years

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11 (22) questions tag

Sooo I was tagged by the lovely Claudia @s-lay-ing and my annoying sister @yooncheoly who just wanted me to have to answer double the questions (that is what she said to me) in the 11 questions tag! so here goes. Thanks for tagging me CLAUDIA! fu Kelby. Also sorry this took so long I'm so behind on so many tags its insane!

Their Questions:(For me)

1_recommend me a song/songs you’ve recently really really liked

It doesn't need to be said but all of Al1 tbh, also I'm always listening to Shinee’s Odd!

2_ put your music player/iTunes on shuffle, the first 22 songs are the songs you’d perform in a concert, how is it? (Again, no need to list all the songs if you don’t want to but 👀👀👀) I love it - Dean For life - Exo Gold Dust Woman - Fleetwood Mac 365 Fresh - Triple H You Gave Your Love To Me Softly - Weezer Wild - Troye Sivan Man in a Movie - Day6 Falling for You - Exo I Dont Like You Anymore - The Last Shadow Puppets Platonic Love - Snuper Your Algebra - The Shins Gone For Good - The Shins Shining Diamond - Seventeen No Way Down - The Shins (canyoutellthisismyfavoritegroup??) U Need Me - Shinee She Just Won’t Believe Me - Tame Impala Reckless Serenade - Arctic Monkeys Miracle Aligner- The Last Shadow Puppets Beautiful - Monsta x Box of Rain - The Grateful Dead Who Loves the Sun - The Velvet Underground This Charming Man - The Smiths

Honesty it would be lit but strange af which is ideal sooo

3_ selfies or photos taken by someone else? (Not going to lie, I don’t like taking selfies so I’d rather someone take a pic of me 😂)

Selfies I guess, I end up looking like beef jerky in pictures other people take of me tbh

4_ recommend me a movie I haven't see a whole lot as far as movies go lately! but I always recommend any Studio Ghibli Film!

5_ the idea of thinking that in order to be successful in music you must get the approval from the west (specifically the us and europe): against or in favor of? (I’m not even talking kpop wise it’s just there’s a south american singer who has been on the business for YEARS yet just now she got some recognition due that she was nominated to a grammy or sth like ??????)

??? who thinks this??? not in favor at all! people need to realize that there are other music markets in the world besides the American one??? LIkeee ???

6_ would you open your own store? If so, what would you sell?

tbh probably no but if I did it would 100% be art related

7_ food you just cannot eat Ooo I agree with the no bones thing ewwwwwwww, also any kind of dressing such as ranch or Caesar or mayo no no no, also horseradish, I also eat very little meat, its gross texture makes me want to cry!

8_ pre 2000 music or past 2000 music? (Pre 2000, I can almost count with my fingers how many artists from this millennium I like, legit) Both! Im a firm believer that no matter the time there is always good music! you just have to find it! I do listen to more pre 2000′s but thats just preference!

9_ you have the opportunity to create your own Just Dance kpop song list, which songs (based on the choreo) would you add? (No need to create the whole list but like, which songs must be on the game?) gonna also have to go with seventeen on this one, cause family friendly fun!

10_ if you were offered the chance to live the life of a kpop star during their comeback for two weeks (week prior the cb and the week after, with rehearsals, going to interviews, music shows, variety programs [obvi you wouldn’t participate on them but you must go with the rest wherever they go] etc) and all that jazz…would you go through the experience? Yeah that would be interesting! Interesting to see the other side of things!

11_ you can create your own ‘best of’ album with your 15 favorite kpop songs, which songs would you add on it? THIS IS NOT IN ORDER BECAUSE I WOULD DIE

Exo - Unfair (I have this thing for exo holiday songs)(also dean wrote this and that hurts me) Exo cbx - Rhythm After Summer Gfriend - Rough Got7 - If You Do Monsta X - Interstellar Nct 127 - Angel Seventeen - Highlight Seventeen - 20 (this song hurts me) Shinee - 1 of 1 Vixx - Fantasy Winner - Sentimental Blackpink - Playing With Fire Bts - Awake (this song is a masterpiece) Bts - Save Me Astro - Again

this is evil

1~When did you first get into Kpop?And what was the first MV / Song that got you hooked?

December of last year! Exo’s call me baby it was an experience!

2~Who are your Bias Wreckers for the groups that you love? I dont really have them I can just never choose one member lol

3~If you had the chance to go to ONLY 1 concert and go backstage and hang out and meet everyone who would you choose and why? Seventeen cause you know why lol

4~Have you ever met one of your idols?How was it if you have?And if you haven’t, who would you want to meet and why? Nope I haven't!

5~What’s the coolest thing that you have bought(Merchandise wise)From the groups that you love? SEVENTEEN IZE PHOTOBOOK I CRY IWANTDIE

6~Can you recommend some of your favorite MV’s to watch? ANY DAY6 THEY NEED LOVE

7~Favorite Video games(If you play them)? Portal series, Dragon age series!

8~Favorite picture of your ultimate bias?

9~What’s your favorite choreo? I really like all of seventeens newest choreos, basically anything kwon soonyoung has touched

10~Favorite era? Seventeen Pretty u/going seventeen, or shinee view/odd

11~How do the people in your life react when you tell them that you listen to kpop?Are they supportive or just against it? Girl you know your always there when it happens lol

So that was all! Im too tired to tag anyone or write my own questions because I suck at it! If you see this and want to do this do these lovelies questions because they are far superior to me in the art of question asking! bye!

#Jk I love you kelby #hehe #ily too Claudia!#Tag #im tired #im die

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