#tw: parental fighting

[idiot-mushroom]

normal trip to mcdonalds

#this came to me in a memory from when i had to drive with my mom and dad #and after their fight one of my parents had to get out of the car and i got mcdonalds after #implied sa tw #sa tw #emotional neglect #emotional abuse #emotional abuse tw #<— just in case #it’s my au and i get to project onto my characters how i like #ttnm au #ttnm #teenage turtle ninja mutants #tmnt au #my tmnt au #tmnt #my tmnt iteration #tmnt iteration #comic #my comic #my art shit #tmnt raph #tmnt raphael #tmnt splinter #baron draxum

[theloveinc]

I know for a fact in my heart that Bakugo is one of those kids who was taken on family vacations every year as a child, with pictures of him on every trip looking all grumpy in the photos… and not only is it weird for him to find out YOU didn’t get to do that (or as often)… but it’s also weird when he’s trying to take your two year old to Tokyo Disney bc it’s just something kids are “supposed to do” APPARENTLY.

#Bakugo #you’re like ‘I know we have money now but we don’t have to spend it like THAT’ #parenting with Bakugo is fun bc yeah ur kid has manners but also like… it’s very easy for them to not be humble #I know you have to fight for your kids LIFE to get them to have a normal growing up experience #like going to daycare instead of ‘oh u can just stay home with them 24/7’ #like baby I love that idea but I would go CRAZY #anyway I’m specifically thinking of baku as one of those kids who goes to Hawaii every year #like … first of all. 😬. second of all. spoiled. #and he doesn’t even know #6 year old ass in a lei and Hawaiian shirt at a fake luau picture #shii posts #kids tw

[furiousgoldfish]

I wasn't going to write personal posts on this topic, but this one is for all of the people who insist we are not allowed to call out narcissists for their actions, we are not allowed to call it 'narcissistic abuse', and what we're doing by saying that, is in fact, stigmatizing and marginalizing a group of people with a disorder.

I understand all of you want to be kind, and not accuse someone of being abusive, if they're presumed to be struggling with a disorder. Being accused yourself, that you're creating stigma if you do it, can feel uncomfortable and wrong. And to accuse those who are struggling the worst, of stigmatizing if they speak up about abuse, can be devastating.

Stigma, however, is not created in small, isolated communities of people who have no public voice, it's not created in the space where people go when they have nowhere else to turn to. The public does not listen to victims, they listen to the framing that makes it the easiest to ignore abuse. Which is, coincidentally, the abuser's narrative.

Hearing that narcissists are to be protected and that to say otherwise is evil, can easily take vigor if the most loud, aggressive and forceful people are yelling it, in a community of mostly scared, vulnerable individuals. So you relent and decide, it's simply kind to just defend whoever has a disorder, no matter what it is, no matter the consequences. You find it easier to not do research, to not look at reality, but pick whatever is the most convenient. If people yelling the loudest are saying 'narcissistic abuse doesn't exist! you're hurting people by saying it does!' then it's the easiest to repeat it and accept that it's right.

So now let's scale back a bit, and look at what is going on specifically in the community of abused and traumatized people on tumblr. You have a group of people who are claiming that the narcissists abused them, who can recount horrific, devastating, destructive, traumatic and severely damaging experiences of abuse by narcissistic parents or partners. People who have developed dissociative disorders, complex trauma, chronic conditions and a whole ordeal of mental disorders due to the extensive, long lasting abuse. Most of these people were children, when exposed to the narcissists. Most of these people have loved those narcissists with all of their hearts. For the most of them, it took half of their lifetime to realize abuse was going on, and that their symptoms were not imagined or without a cause. These people have been tortured, and are looking for a safe space.

You also have children here who are currently being abused, who are telling horror stories of their current reality where they're used, exploited, controlled, violated, their identity and humanity erased, who exist only as a resource to the narcissists. They're looking for a way to recognize what is happening to them, why are they feeling this awful, and how to get out.

And of course, you have people in this community who have been abused in other kinds of circumstances and by other kinds of abusers, and we're all trying to figure out what the truth is, who to blame, how to get out of abuse, how to gain freedom, how to stay safe. So it's a community of heavily traumatized individuals, most of them very vulnerable to future abuse, a lot of them children, a lot of them abused and sensitive to other kinds of grooming and abuse.

Narcissists are infiltrating this specific community and demanding to be promoted as safe and non-dangerous, to these specific people. They're not trying to appeal to general public, to psychologically healthy, to people who have resources and community to protect themselves from abuse, no, they're aiming at this specific, already-abused, already groomed, vulnerable, struggling, traumatized community of people, and threatening to smear-campaign, cancel, expel and banish anyone who doesn't accept to view them as harmless.

Why would they do this? Which safe and harmless person would put themselves in a group of traumatized and vulnerable people to bully and threaten them for the sake of 'public image' and 'erasing the stigma'? Tell me what is humane about this. Tell me what is humane about asking a victim of narcissistic abuse to be narcissist-positive on their trauma-related blog. Tell me what is normal about telling a victim of torture to say positive thing about their torturer, or to be expelled from their community as a punishment.

You are extending our torture. You are now the extension of our trauma.

And when you're out here saying 'not all narcissists', tell me how do you know which ones then? Do you know that if you're saying this to a child, they might then happily accept a narcissist in their life, who then might end up torturing the kid? You don't know which ones are dangerous, and neither do they. Are you okay with that? Can you feel peace in your heart knowing you helped this to happen? Can you look at yourself knowing you went and claimed, to a vulnerable, or already-traumatized child or a vulnerable person, to accept this potentially dangerous individual in their life, who then hurt them? Will you tell them it's their own fault and to 'stop claiming narcissists are abusive' if they confide it to you?

You're not even thinking of what will happen to those kids. I was left with narcissists alone. I was locked up in a basement. I was beaten. I was forced to play games where I would end up inevitably tortured and told it was my fault for 'losing'. I was brainwashed into believing that I'm not a human being. I was denied food if I didn't do as I was told. I was brutalized and almost murdered. I was told I would be dead if I tried to escape. I will never recover.

And I'm not even one of the worst cases. Children have been thru worse. Children are going thru it right now.

If you feel safe recommending to children and the vulnerable, to go and accept narcissists in their life, this is what you're risking. This is what some of them are capable of. You don't know which ones. Are you really going to use children and most vulnerable people in society, to test and see if the narcissists would torture them or not? You're really going to tell them to go and associate themselves with a group that has a high count of predators, just so that the predators in the groups wouldn't be upset or feel excluded? Just so you'd feel safe from being told off by them? So you wouldn't have to deal with them?

If you can put kids at risk and feel like you've done nothing wrong, then I don't care what else you have to say. You can no longer pretend not to know. You can't pretend that defending narcissists is a kind gesture. You can't pretend to be 'inclusive' when you barge into a community of victims and tell them to shut up about the abuse they worked so hard to recognize. You can't pretend you're faultless when you insist that the most vulnerable people in the population should be accepting and positive about the most dangerous group to them, so you'd have it easier, so you wouldn't have to even look at what narcissists have already done to us.

We're not your shield. We're not here to be scapegoats for your cowardice. We're not sacrificing children because it's so easy and convenient to bow down to bullies. It's been enough of this. Respect our boundaries. We don't want narcissists to have access to us.

#narcissistic abuse #child abuse #abusive parents #toxic parents #tw torture mention #tw descriptions of abuse #tw physical abuse #tw mention of murder attempts #putting kids at risk for the sake of 'politics' #telling victims of abuse to be accesible to potential abusers #so the abusers would have an easier time getting close to a victim #we can't get any protection in the rest of society #but we should and will be protected in our own damn community #we're not going to accept that our safe space is nowhere #we're going to fight

[severussnapemylove]

Headcanon; Severus is a graze eater. He has snacks stashed in his office, work room, private chambers. From what I know of his childhood, I doubt he was getting regular or decent meals. Even though he's spent a couple decades at Hogwarts and rationally knows there's going to be more than enough food every day, it's both a habit and feeling of security to have something to eat where he can easily get to.

#Headcanon #severus snape #pro severus snape #tw child abuse #tw c ptsd #harry potter universe #Recurring theme I've seen in characters with neglectful/abusive parents is they graze eat as adults #Sev's parents wouldn't keep their child clean and properly clothed #I doubt they were feeding him properly #Plus with the hiding in your room while the parents fight #You can't get to the kitchen to eat because you can't come out of hiding #pro snape

[exhaustedpirate]

parent for hire

finally, the next instalment of this adventure! only another one to go (and an epilogue)! once more, major thanks to @kmomof4 for being the best beta!

Chapter Six - Camelot

word count: 9,372 words 

rating: Teen and Up

tag list: @cocohook38 ; @bluewildcatfanatic ; @piraterefrigerator ; @sotangledupinit ; @booksteaandtoomuchtv ; @teamhook

read on AO3 | prologue | one | two | three | four | five (1) | five (2) | five (3)

They were summoned to the throne room the next morning. There had been new clothes laid out in their room and a bath prepared. Killian chose to explain it with magic and not think about the fact that there had possibly been someone in the room without him noticing.

Their bags had been delivered to their room the night prior and he was happy to note that their things were all present and accounted for. There wasn’t much he needed from it except for the drawing of his brother and his compass - a gift from Nemo. And his sword, of course.

Emma and her parents were already waiting for them in the throne room. Emma looked as beautiful as she had before. Her hair had been pulled away from her face, a blue leather vest and a white shirt she wore fit her like a glove, and the dark trousers complemented her form. 

The three seemed deep in conversation, and the royals’ frowns told him that they weren’t happy with the course of it. He wasn’t a betting man anymore but he would wager he knew the subject.

“Even before we appeared on the bank of Lake Nostos, we promised we wouldn’t leave you again. We won’t go back on it now,” Snow tearfully explained.

“You can’t go. You said last night that you were ready to be the people’s ruler again. You have to stay here.” Emma’s tone had a hint of panic, of fear. “This is my mission, I need to go.”

“We can’t change your mind?” David almost begged. “We only just got you back…”

Emma took a deep breath. “I need to do this.”

The determination in her eyes blazed like fire and Killian watched as Snow looked at David,  and gripped his hand in a tight grip, an entire conversation being held within their gazes. They turned watering eyes and sad smiles on their daughter, and Killian thought his heart would break.

“We know,” Snow said, her hand on Emma’s cheek. “You’re so grown, a hero in your own right.”

“I-I’m not-” Emma stuttered, her eyes shining in the morning light.

“You are,” David interrupted, pulling Emma and Snow to him for a tight hug.

Killian wondered how many years Emma had longed to be held this way, to be loved this way, and his heart went out to her while his mind traveled to the only parent he still had.

“Y-You don’t have to go, Emma.” Henry’s quiet voice next to him broke him away from his thoughts and the three-person hug in front of them as they finally noticed their audience. “You can stay. You should stay.”

His shaking voice had Killian’s hand tighten on his shoulder.

“Henry,” Emma kneeled in front of the boy, her hands cupping his cheeks. “I want to go with you. I want to make sure you’ll be safe.”

“Are you sure?” 

“I’m going to let you in on a little secret, Henry.” Snow’s voice shook just as much as the boy’s. “This family will always find each other.”

Snow stood close by, her hand back in her husband’s and he nodded. “There have been many times when Snow and I were separated from each other but we still held on to hope.”

“We were separated from our daughter all those years ago, but we had hope that we’d see her again,” Snow added with a watery smile. 

“And look where we are now,” David finished.

“Never lose hope, Henry. Even the possibility of a happy ending is a very powerful thing.”

Henry nodded, tears running down his cheeks but a hopeful smile on his lips. He threw himself at Emma, burying his face on her neck as they both held on tight to each other. “Thank you,” he whispered.

Hope. 

Maybe they were on to something.

After all, it was abundantly clear to him how much his life had changed ever since he started having hope.

David cleared his throat and Killian took the distraction to wipe away the tears that had escaped down his cheeks. “Since you’re off on an adventure, I wanted to give you guys something.” He gestured with his head towards the throne at the end of the room.

Henry and Emma followed him holding on to each other’s hands. Killian made to follow, when a hand on his chest stopped him. Looking down, he saw Snow’s watery eyes hiding a fire behind them. Emma’s fire.

“I have something important to ask of you.”

Killian nodded. “Of course, your Majesty.”

“That’s my daughter.” Her voice broke and she cleared her throat. “That’s my daughter and I want her back in my arms. I am prepared to give you anything you wish to protect her and make sure she lives. Gold. Jewels. Anything.”

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to decline the offer, Your Majesty.” 

“What?” Her eyes were wide open with shock, her lips parted.

“You see…” He trailed away for a moment, his smile towards her nothing like his usual smirk, there was too much swirling through his chest to allow for such arrogance. “I have no need for your gold or your jewels. All I need is for Emma to be safe.” He couldn’t help the way his eyes drifted to her, the way she smiled at her father, the way she shined.

When he looked back at the Queen, she was smiling, a soft smile that lit up her eyes. 

“You love her, don’t you?”

Killian looked away, scratching behind his ear. Was it so obvious?

“I’m starting to,” he confessed. “It creeps up on you, doesn’t it?”

Snow laughed and he couldn’t help but smile. 

“It does, yes.” She nodded, watching him for a few seconds and sobering up. “When we left the castle yest- I mean, that day, we had hope that we’d see her again, yes, but I also had hope that, even if we didn’t, she’d be loved. She’d be okay.”

The Queen cleared her throat, trying to stave off the swelling sadness.

“She told us it wasn’t anything like I’d hoped. I regret that we weren’t able to give her that happiness and love.” She took a deep shaky breath. “But she’s strong. She pushed through and she became more than we ever expected. Seeing the way you and Henry love her, makes it all a little easier. Thank you.”

“Believe me, Your Majesty, loving them is, without a doubt, the easiest thing I’ve ever done.”

The smile on his face melted into shock by the Queen’s tight embrace around him. He hadn’t felt such motherly affection in years. His arms went around her slowly, his eyes closing.

“Killian, look what I have!”

Henry’s call broke their hug, Snow grabbing onto his arms to look at him with a smile. He could only smile back and let her hope fill him. Killian cleared his throat.

“What do you have, lad?” 

“A knife!”

“What?!” In a flash, Killian’s smile again turned into shock as he strode over to them.

“It’s not a knife, Henry. It’s a dagger,” David corrected, a smile on his face.

“Why does he even have a dagger?” 

“For protection,” David answered like it was obvious. “But only as a last resource, remember?”

“Yeah!” Henry’s reassurance didn’t mean much when the boy was pretending that he was in an imaginary fight with his dagger.

“Henry?” David crossed his arms on his chest and raised an eyebrow.

Henry looked up quickly, his eyes wide and mouth agape before nodding. “Right, last resource.” Sheepishly, the boy sheathed the dagger on the new scabbard on his belt. “Look, Snow. Look at my dagger!”

Despite his concern over the boy, he guessed David was right, Henry should be able to defend himself without his magic. Just the thought of the boy in danger, however… Killian didn’t want to consider it. He looked away to find Emma’s attention on the sword in her hands.

It looked nothing like her old one. This one looked heavier - more of a royal’s sword than a pirate’s, he guessed. The hilt was golden and the cross-guard was curved, a masterful build. 

“Looks like a perfect fit, don’t you think?” David asked, having followed his gaze, a look of pride in his eyes.

“I-I don’t know.”

“Since we can’t go with you, I want to know you’ll have a piece of me with you. To help you.” David’s voice was shaky despite his best efforts.

“Thank you.” Emma’s voice matched her father’s as she smiled back. She sheathed the sword on the equally detailed scabbard on her belt.

“Killian!” Henry called as he approached them with Snow. “Have you told them where we���re headed next?”

“No, lad.” He smiled. “I thought you’d want to do the honors.”

“So, last night, Killian checked Cygnus. You know, the star we’re following.” Henry looked between them and, like the avid listeners they were, they nodded. “It’s telling us to go West, to Ca-”

“I’m glad you’re all here.” There was a flash of blue magic after the sound of the Blue Fairy’s voice and Killian couldn’t help the surge of annoyance that rose in him at her presence and interruption.

“Is there something wrong?” Snow asked with a confused frown.

“No, no, I’m here to open a portal for Emma and the Truest Believer,” she answered matter-of-factly. “They’ll be heading to Camelot.”

Henry deflated next to him and Killian frowned. “How do you know that?” 

The Blue Fairy sighed. “Camelot is where Merlin will be waiting for the Truest Believer, to fulfill the prophecy.”

“What about Avalon?” Emma asked, taking a step forward. “I’m supposed to take Henry there.”

“Avalon is a myth, dear. It doesn’t exist. It’s merely a sailor’s tale.” Her tone was patronizing as she glanced unimpressed at Killian. 

“Tinkerbell told me that the prophecy said that’s where I’m supposed to take Henry.”

“You should know better than to listen to that girl. She has disgraced her role as a fairy and  has no business interpreting the prophecy.” 

Emma frowned at the fairy’s haughty and indifferent tone. He agreed with the sentiment. Killian watched as Henry took a deep breath and approached the fairy. He couldn’t help the step he took towards the boy, the instinct to protect rising fiercely in him, stopped only by Emma’s reassuring hand on his arm.

“Blue, I need to-”

“Ah, yes, Henry, I have something for you,” the fairy interrupted.

His face lit up expectantly but Killian had already learned to expect the worse from her. 

“Tiger Lily asked me to give you this.” In her hand was a vial of sparkly dust. “It's fairy dust.” 

Henry frowned as he reached up to take the vial, only for the Blue Fairy to pull it from his reach.

“I was against giving this to you, given your age, inexperience, and its power, but she was adamant that you have it. Tiger Lily is a… special fairy, and she knows how to get her point across.” The frown on her face told Killian there was more she was leaving out of the explanation, but given how secretive the fairies were - and the Blue Fairy in particular - he doubted any of them would ever know what it was. The fairy raised her eyebrow expectantly. “She assured me that you’d use it wisely.”

“Of course, you can trust me.” The boy clutched the vial carefully, reverently. “Did she say anything else?”

“No.”

Henry cleared his throat. “Then maybe you can answer some of my questions.” Killian was proud of his strong tone but the Blue Fairy’s unchanged expression didn’t give him hope that she’d answer.

“No time for that.” Blue waved him away and the boy’s crestfallen expression was heartbreaking. She turned to the others. “Say your goodbyes quickly and I’ll open the portal.”

As soon as Henry got close enough, Killian pulled him close. “I thought they cared.” The boy’s whisper had him tightening his embrace.

Pulling away, Killian caressed the boy’s cheek before patting the hand still clutching the vial with his hook. “I think they still do, my boy.” 

Henry looked down and nodded slowly. “Yeah…”

Killian pulled the boy in for another tight embrace, his hand on the back of his head.

“Be careful.” Snow spoke behind them, her hands on Emma’s cheeks, her voice shaky. “Trust your companions and please, don’t do anything reckless.” 

“That might be hard, considering how much like your mot-” Snow gave David a silent glare, causing a watery smile to bloom on Emma’s face. “Like all your family you are.” 

Emma smiled wide. “I promise I’ll be safe.” She was the one to initiate the hug now, her eyes closed in happiness, her hands gripping her parents’ clothes. “I’ll be back.”

Henry and Killian watched as they slowly released each other and Snow placed a kiss on Emma’s forehead. There was an insistent throat clearing from behind them that Killian completely ignored but broke the peaceful moment between the other three.

Snow and David made their way to Killian and Henry next, David pulling Henry into a big hug that lifted the boy’s feet from the ground and made his giggles echo in the large room. Snow’s hand was on his arm with a reminder of his promise in her eyes. He nodded.

They switched next and while David’s handshake wasn’t as emotional as Snow’s hug, Killian still saw the emotion in the man’s eyes, pleading for the same promise the Queen asked of him. Killian tightened his grip on the man’s hand and nodded, an unspoken agreement between the two. Snow was peppering kisses all over Henry’s face making him laugh once more. That was definitely a good start to an adventure.

The Blue Fairy’s impatience grew too loud to ignore and they all turned to her.

“Now that you’re all done,” the fairy pointedly remarked, “it’s time to go.”

With a wave of her wand, a bright orange portal roared to life. 

“We love you, Emma,” Snow called over the noise of the portal.

“Come back to us,” David added.

Emma nodded vigorously, lips thinned in overwhelming emotion. She held onto Henry’s hand. Killian held on to the other as they approached the swirling portal. They all turned back to look at the royals they were leaving behind for one last glance.

Not waiting another moment to change their minds, they all crossed through the portal. 

---

The first thing that came to Killian’s mind once they came out on the other side was the lack of nausea. Which was a very happy and welcome reprieve.

Second thing was the silence. 

They stood in the middle of a pathway, stone walls standing tall in front of them. Killian turned around to an empty village. Houses were closed, streets were clear, shops were shut.

He was getting really tired of desolate kingdoms. 

But this silence was different. There were people here, he could feel it. Unlike Misthaven, there were no signs of disaster. People were just gone. Hidden.

“Another deserted kingdom?” Emma sighed, her voice quiet.

“It seems our little adventure has a theme.” 

“I feel something inside those doors,” Henry whispered, his finger pointed at two large wooden doors embedded into a tall stone wall.

“Last chance to turn back,” Killian teased, even with an anxious cadence to his voice.

Emma rolled her eyes with a hint of a smile while Henry chuckled before pulling the two adults towards the doors. Taking a deep breath, they pushed the doors open.

The doors gave way to a large courtyard lit by the midday sun. On the other side of the circle, stood a man in shining silver armor. His hair was dark and his terrible grin shone in the sunlight. Next to him, sat a woman. Hair as dark as the man’s but her expression spoke of an immense sadness, regret and fear, all the fight taken out of her.

“He told me you’d appear,” The man said, his voice echoing in the courtyard.

“Who are you?” Killian asked, standing in front of Henry who grabbed onto his sleeve.

“I’m King Arthur of Camelot and I’ll be taking the Heart of the Truest Believer from you.”

“Just you, mate?” Killian asked, a smirk on his face and eyebrow raised. “I have to say, I like our odds.”

Arthur’s grin widened before he whistled. For a few seconds, nothing happened. Suddenly, a large lion-like creature crashed into the courtyard - its mane and tail was made of fire and it was easily twice the size of an actual lion. Its roar shook the ground they stood on.

“You had to ask,” Emma grumbled next to him, unsheathing her sword. 

“At least it’s just one this time,” Henry commented from behind them.

Killian sighed in exasperation, shifting on his feet as he armed himself.

The creature sat next to the king, his fiery eyes on the three strangers. While Killian was a man of bravery, the creature’s size was enough to make him reconsider his initial plan.

“Alright, mate, we might have started on the wrong foot,” Killian started, trying for a disarming tone.

“Give me the Heart of the Truest Believer or I will take it from you. It's as simple as that, mate,” Arthur interrupted.

“Why do you want it so much?” Henry asked, taking a step forward. Both Killian and Emma stepped closer to the boy at Arthur’s hungry stare. He knew it was Henry.

“Why?! My kingdom is broken, and your heart will make it whole!”

“And you’d kill an innocent boy for your kingdom?!” Emma asked, angrily.

“Please, Arthur,” the woman next to him pleaded. “You don’t need to do this, we can still be happy.”

Killian watched as the madness in Arthur’s gaze eased, his eyes shifting from his queen to Henry. There was something hidden behind his eyes - recognition. A fast blur flew over them and he felt as if they were being watched, a tingle on the back of his neck. Any progress he thought they had made with Arthur seemed to shatter, a shadow shuttering his eyes once more.

“For years, I lived for Merlin’s prophecies!” Arthur shouted. “For years, I was mocked, ridiculed, for believing that I would be king! And when it finally happened, I’m given this, this broken kingdom! But with your heart, I will make it whole! Your heart will make me a king!”

He raised his hand then, the beast standing on four feet, its fire burning bright and angry.

“No more talking, the Heart is mine!” 

Without any further warning, the beast leapt forward, its thundering steps unsettling their footing. Henry threw his hands up, a strong magical shield stopping it in its tracks. The shield wouldn’t last long, with the beast charging it again and again.

“What are we going to do?” Killian asked, watching Henry.

“Arthur is controlling the monster,” Emma answered, focused on the creature. “We need to split up.”

“What?”

“Like we did in Arendelle,” Henry added, with obvious difficulty. The strain of holding the shield against the monster’s attacks was wearing on the boy.

“Henry and I will deal with this beast, you’ll get Arthur,” Emma delegated. “On three, Henry will lower the shield, I will hold the creature back while you run to Arthur. Ok?”

Killian nodded. “Be careful, both of you.” His eyes lingered on his companions, hope burgeoning in him for their safety. 

“You too,” Henry said, Emma nodding in agreement.

“Alright, one, two, three!” 

Henry’s shield came down followed immediately by a blast of white magic from Emma’s hands. The beast was thrown a few feet, letting Killian use that distraction to run towards where Arthur watched the fight. Expectedly, Arthur saw him coming and armed himself in time to block Killian’s attack. 

The beast focused back on the magic users. Killian kept an attentive ear on the battle next to him, hoping that he wouldn't hear Emma or Henry get hurt.

Killian and Arthur’s swords clanged in tune with the beast’s growls. Arthur didn’t fight like any royal he’d fought against before but then again, neither did Killian.

“Call off your beast,” Killian grunted, as he managed to lock Arthur’s sword against his. “You won’t win!”

Arthur’s determined gaze spoke louder than any words as they forced each other’s swords.

More than willing to play dirty, Killian kicked at Arthur’s leg, ruining his balance and causing him to fall. While on the floor, Arthur grinned even with Killian’s sword pointed at him. But he wasn’t looking at him. “I disagree.” 

Killian’s heart beat louder in his chest as he turned to look at his companions, even knowing how dangerous it was. Turning to them, Killian saw Henry laying down, looking terrified as the beast’s large paws pinned him to the ground. The beast bellowed loudly.

He couldn’t see Emma.

“Henry!” Killian called, turning towards the boy, blind with his need to protect him.

“Not so fast.” Arthur’s smug voice reminded him of his ongoing battle. “We are not done yet.”

He was glad for his years of practice as he managed to side-step a swipe at his head. A white glow and a loud whine had him hoping that Emma had managed to save Henry. Arthur’s angry expression confirmed it.

From then on, his mind was torn. Killian tried to focus on Arthur’s fighting techniques, on learning and avoiding them, but he knew most of his focus was elsewhere.

There was a lull in the magical battle next to him. A million scenarios paraded through his mind and he hated all of them. His sword swipes became faster and more intense and he relished the frown on Arthur’s brow. Their swords locked and he put all his strength behind it.

“Now!” Henry’s shout surprised them both and they turned at the same time.

Killian watched as Henry jumped to the side as Emma used her hands to direct water on top of the beast. Amazingly effective, the fire was extinguished and the beast fell to the ground, breathing heavily.

“No!” Arthur shouted and Killian quickly focused on stopping any thought of intervention by holding his sword against the king’s neck.

Unflinchingly, Henry approached the beast and fumbled with something on his clothing. From where he stood, Killian saw the sparkle of what he assumed was the fairy dust Henry had been gifted fall on the beast.

A blinding light encompassed the large monster. When it was gone, they were all surprised to find a man lying where the beast used to be. A man wearing a knight’s outfit. 

“Lancelot!” The queen called from where she had been sitting restlessly before rushing towards the waking man on the floor. “I thought you had left.”

Despite the distance between where he stood and the tender scene in front of him, Killian still heard the relieved sigh of the man. “I could never leave you, Gwen.” 

Never had he thought they would be reuniting long-lost lovers with this adventure, but then again, he never thought he’d be in this adventure in the first place.

His eyes immediately found Henry and Emma, who appeared unscathed even if tired. The relieved feeling in his heart was overwhelming, and he couldn’t take his eyes off them. Killian could only look at Henry’s proud and happy expression, at Emma’s hand on the boy’s shoulder, and her own look of joy. It looked simply beautiful on her. 

“Killian! Look out!” Henry called loudly and Killian moved just in time to miss Arthur’s swipe at his head. A bright white light threw Arthur against one of the stone columns, rendering him unconscious.

A word of gratitude was stopped on his tongue at Emma’s look of terror and Henry’s matching one. A breeze blew through the courtyard making him aware of a cold sting on his throat. He dropped his sword to touch the left side of his neck. When he looked at his hand, there was an alarming amount of blood on it for a mere scratch.

“Oh.” Killian’s knees wobbled under him as he knelt to the ground. In seconds, Emma and Henry were in front of him.

There was pressure on his neck. Emma’s green eyes came into focus and his heart shattered at the worry and fear in them. He wished they would never look that way.

“Killian?” Henry’s quiet call squeezed his heart. He had promised that Henry wouldn’t feel that way again. “Can’t you heal him, Emma?” 

Emma shut her eyes and he mourned the loss. There was only the sound of his labored breathing.

“I can’t!” Emma shouted in frustration. “Come on, Killian, stay with us!”

He wanted to tell her that he wouldn't leave - that he would never leave them - but the pressure on his throat stopped him. Their faces turned blurry and he could feel his mouth open and close, wanting to tell him that it was okay, that all that mattered was that they were okay. That he loved them.

Emma’s face became even more blurry as she shook her head.

“No.” Her voice sounded far away but never more clear. “We are not losing you, not now, not ever.” He felt her deep breath in his own chest.

The warmth on his hand disappeared and Killian watched as Emma grabbed Henry’s hand and placed it over hers on his neck. “We’ll do this together, like we’ve done everything so far. What do you say, kid?”

Killian could hear the desperation in her voice and he wondered if Henry could hear it too. The pressure on his neck grew and he was finally able to take a deep breath.

“Let’s do this.” Henry’s voice was less confident than he no doubt intended, too wrapped in despair, but it didn’t make Killian trust him any less.

There was a sudden burning feeling on his throat and he howled in pain. He felt as though his wound was being cauterized from the inside. There was a tight grip on his arms, barely felt over the pain. 

He remembered the way Nemo held his only hand as the blurry face of a shipmate burned his stump. He remembered wanting it to stop, wanting everything to stop, wanting the peace and quiet of death. He remembered the way he held onto revenge when he woke up days later. 

This pain, however, he bore it, cherished it, welcomed it because he knew that it would allow him to live. It would allow him to be okay. It would allow him to see Emma and Henry again.

“Killian?” 

It did.

His eyes fluttered open to find the worried faces of his companions, his family. Killian only had a second to witness the look of relief and happiness on Henry’s face before the boy threw himself against him in a tight hug, the feeling of holding the boy in his arms better than any magical remedy.

With his arms wrapped around the boy, he finally looked at Emma. There were tears in her eyes but the most beautiful smile on her lips. How he loved her smile. 

“You aren’t getting rid of me yet, love.” His voice was hoarse and quieter than he expected but it was worth it for the quiet chuckle she gave.

“Good.”

He felt the warmth of her hand on his face, the light stroke of her thumb on his cheek but all he could see were her eyes. The happiness, the relief, and something else he hoped would be there for a long time to come.

“Is he okay?” A familiar female voice sounded from behind Emma. 

She nodded, without taking her eyes off him, a soft smile on her lips. “Yeah, he’s okay.”

Henry’s head lifted from their embrace to smile brightly at the two of them and Killian could only laugh. Laugh at how stupidly happy he was to have met them. The way they joined in his laughter warmed his heart, and reminded him of how happy he was to be alive.

Killian held on to Emma’s arm, sadly staining the white shirt with his blood - not that they cared much - so he could sit up. Henry’s hands were on his arms, a worried frown on his forehead. But Killian only smiled. He was alive, he was okay, he was ready to carry on his life with them. His hand tightened on Emma’s arm as he bumped his forehead with Henry’s. 

“Thank you,” he whispered before he moved back to look at the two of them. “Thank you for saving me.”

Henry’s smile was wide, his small body crashing into him for a second time. “Thank you for staying.” The boy’s whisper sounded loud in his ears and he wished he could stay in this moment forever.

A loud scream interrupted them.

They looked towards the source to find the queen with a horrified look on her face as she pointed towards the far side of the courtyard. 

“Arthur…” Lancelot whispered with the same expression.

They all turned to see Arthur’s body standing in front of the pillar Emma had thrown him against. That would be alarming all on its own, but the truly shocking part was the fact that his head hung forward, the man still clearly unconscious. The king’s body took stumbling steps towards them, his head lolling from side to side. 

As Arthur continued his lumbering approach, Killian noticed a second shadow on the floor. A much less fumbling figure from Arthur’s unstable form.

With Emma’s help, Killian stood from the ground, pulling Henry behind them. From the corner of his eye, he could see Lancelot - even in his weakened state - try to shield his queen.

And then, Arthur stopped. 

They watched as his head was thrown back, his whole body following suit and so precariously unbalanced that Killian wondered how he was still on his feet.

A bright gash appeared in the middle of Arthur’s chest without any response from the man, not even a small whimper, even when a hand burst out from the rift. One of the shadows reflected on the ground began to convulse until it disappeared. 

“Take her to safety, now!” Emma yelled towards the other two people in the courtyard, forcing Henry further behind them, hoping to block his view.

They heard the urging voice of Lancelot and the frightened voice of the queen before the couple’s rushed footsteps reached their ears. 

Their full attention drawn back in front of them once Lancelot and the queen were safely away, they watched as a second hand joined the first, widening the tear in the king’s chest. Killian could only hope he could spare Henry the nightmares that were sure to follow the gruesome scene. It was only moments before a blonde head emerged from the fissure. And then the figure stepped out of the former king’s carcass to stand in front of them, Arthur’s body crumbling to the ground.

“When you want something done, you have to do it yourself.” The surprise guest’s voice was eerily peppy given the macabre scene surrounding them and Killian struggled to keep his jaw from dropping.

He looked only a few years older than Henry, even though his face told of decades of existence and he was dressed in a green outfit that reminded Killian of Emma’s old one. He’d seen him before. Emma gasped.

“Pan…” 

“Hello, Duckling.” Pan was grinning and his voice lacked surprise. He knew they would be here. “Didn’t think you’d seen the last of me, did you?”

“H-How is this possible? You can’t leave Neverland!” Emma’s voice trembled. She looked terrified, a panic in her eyes that he’d only seen once before - when they sailed too close to the island aboard the Black Pearl. A lost girl.

“Our dimwitted king helped me with that,” Pan said smugly, pointing towards the body. “His failure gave me enough time to get the Heart of the Truest Believer myself.” 

“You’re just as dimwitted if you think we’ll let you take the Heart.” Killian took a step forward, inching himself closer to Emma and covering Henry more.

“Ah, Captain Hook, it’s a pleasure to see you again.” Emma tensed up next to him and Henry placed a questioning hand on his arm but he didn't stop directing his glare towards Pan. “I had expected a bounty hunter like you to have been more interested in the deal I offered.”

“You were wrong.” 

“Pan was the one who sent you after me?” Henry’s quiet question pulled his attention off Pan.

“I didn’t know who he was when we spoke.”

“Lucky for you, I’ll give you another chance.” Their eyes followed Pan’s casual pacing, the feeling of prey watching a predator settling on them. “Give me the boy and you can leave. Go back to your life.”

Killian glared at Pan’s knowing and confident grin, as if he knew Killian would take the deal. Henry’s hand tightened on his left arm, and Emma sent him a sidelong glance. But Killian couldn’t take his eyes off Pan.

“And what makes you think I would accept?” 

“It’s like you said,” Pan replied with a shrug of his shoulders, “you’re a survivor.” 

A shiver ran down his spine. He’d never said that to Pan or anyone else besides Emma. Not for the first time, the feeling came over him that they were being watched.

“I have been watching you three for a while.” Pan’s eerily calm demeanor became even more disturbing. “So, I’m going to sweeten the deal. Give me the boy and I’ll even let you take someone with you. Emma.” His penetrating stare landed on her and a small, utterly depraved and evil smile lifted the corner of his lips before he spoke again. “My sweet duckling.  We both know how much you would love that.”

“And if I refuse?”

“I’ll kill you all.” 

The demon’s nonchalant attitude as he made the statement made gooseflesh erupt on Killian’s skin, but he just hummed, as if considering the proposal. “That’s an interesting proposition.” His hand tightened on his dagger. “But I’m afraid I’ll have to refuse.” 

Killian was grateful for his connection with Emma as his thrown dagger was matched by the whistling of her short arrow. The weapons traveled towards their common enemy, only for a dark blur to stop them.

Pan laughed, a terrible laugh that made his ears ring. “You didn’t really think it would be that easy, did you?”

They didn’t have time to answer before they were being pulled back by the arms. Killian felt the tight grip immobilizing him but when he tried to escape, he couldn’t see anyone. Looking towards where Emma was caught in the same struggle as he was, he noticed a dark shadow behind her, a shadow holding the arms of her shadow. It occurred to him that this might be a battle they wouldn’t be able to win.

Pan approached with slow, confident steps where Henry stood helplessly looking between his two companions. The lad looked scared but Killian’s struggle to escape was useless.

“Get away from the boy!” 

“Leave him alone!”

Killian and Emma’s voices were angry but they were laced with desperation.

“You had your chance.” Pan shrugged again with a wide grin. “Now, you’ll get to see me kill the boy. And then, you’ll see me kill my runaway Swan. Only then will I kill you. Nice and slow!”

Killian’s struggle grew more violent as Pan got closer to Henry. From the corner of his eye, he could see Emma was doing the same. 

“Why do you want my heart?” Killian could hear the fear in Henry’s voice, but there was bravery in his eyes.

“Have you learned nothing? I want power! I want the power your heart will give me!” Henry had to look up as Pan approached, but he didn’t back down. 

There was pride mixed in with Killian’s fear.

“How did you know it was me?”

“I thought you were smarter than that, laddie,” Pan grinned. “A prophecy told me about you, a baby born in a night with no moon or stars. Your parents knew it too, so it took me a long time to find you.”

“You saw my parents?” Henry’s voice was quiet, like the young boy he never got the chance to be. Killian’s frown matched the one on Emma’s face.

“No. But my Lost Ones did, the last ones to see them alive.” Pan’s fake pout had Killian’s hair stand at attention. “But that’s only because they’re the ones who killed them.”

The heartbreak coming from Henry nearly brought Killian to his knees. The boy knew he was an orphan but to hear it spoken of so callously and with so much certainty was the height of cruelty. It was clear Pan was enjoying inflicting this pain on the boy. He was feeding off it.

“They told me your father was the first to go, trapped in the house when my boys set it on fire-”

“Stop it!” Emma shouted.

“But your mother?” Pan continued, ignoring the two adults’ struggle, his grin widening. “She escaped, ran away with you, but she didn’t go far-”

“Don’t listen to him, lad!”

“Your mother abandoned you and ran away. You should be thanking me for having had her killed, she deserved it. We even celebrated!”

“He’s lying, Henry, I remember that night!” Emma’s voice broke through Pan’s sadistic game, bringing it to a screeching halt.

Henry turned to her and Killian saw the tears streaking down his cheeks and his begging eyes. Killian’s struggle intensified.

“Remember your place, Duckling,” Pan warned but she ignored him.

“That was the night I escaped, I remember the screams on the island. They weren’t celebrating,” she explained feverishly, “They had failed.” Her eyes were on the boy, a hint of a smile on her face, a smile meant only for him. “They were after you, but they didn’t find you. She didn’t abandon you and deep down you know that.”

Pan growled and Killian watched as another shadow joined the one behind Emma to pull on her hair. An involuntary whimper of pain escaped her lips even as she tried to stifle it. Henry took a step towards her but she shook her head the best she could to stop him. The boy turned back towards Pan.

“She didn’t abandon me.” Henry spoke clearly and with his head held high. “She protected me from you, she saved me. Your games won’t work on me.”

There was a moment when Pan’s frown marred his young face where Killian foolishly thought they could win, that Henry’s bravery would be enough. But then Pan smiled.

“You’re right, no more games.” His voice was soft and calm but it only unnerved them. “I’ll be clear, give me your heart or they die.”

Pan grinned as he snapped his fingers. A black figure appeared in front of Killian, there was no face, no body, merely the shadow of a person. That’s what it was, a shadow - he’d never seen one up close and he suddenly feared it would be the last thing he would ever see.

Without warning, the shadow grabbed onto his shoulders and began to slowly pull. This pain was unlike anything he’d ever experienced before, including the one he had suffered only moments ago. It felt like his insides were being pulled out of him - as if his very essence was being removed.

His screams of pain were echoed by Emma’s, who was clearly suffering his same fate. 

“Run, Henry!” Killian yelled. “You need to run!”

“No! I won’t leave you, I won’t let you die!” 

“You need to go, Henry!” Emma urged him between screams of pain.

“No!” Henry unsheathed his dagger to point it at Pan. “Let them go!” Henry looked so frightened, his dagger held in a shaky grip. 

“Even if you could kill me, they would still die,” Pan gloated with a shrug. Henry’s arm lowered in defeat. “What’ll it be, Believer? You or them?”

“No!”

“Don’t listen to him!”

“I’m sorry… This is my fault, but I can still save you.” 

Time stopped as they watched Henry’s hand shine with a white light before he shoved it into his own chest. They watched as Henry removed a golden heart, his knees wobbling. 

“Please, Henry!”

“Don’t do this!”

Henry glanced towards them with a brave and hopeful gaze. “I love you.” 

They watched as Henry pushed the golden heart into Pan’s chest before collapsing to the floor. Pan’s victorious laughter surrounded them, but what truly mattered was that suddenly there was nothing restraining them, nothing pulling the life out of them anymore.

Before he could take a proper breath, Killian was kneeling next to Henry’s unconscious body, Emma on the other side. His hand touched the boy’s neck, his chest, hoping for a heartbeat he knew wouldn’t be there. His skin was still warm and Killian remembered another one he loved who laid in his arms the same way.

“Is- Is he dead?” Emma’s voice was quiet and Pan’s laughter grew louder and stronger.

Killian’s mouth opened and closed silently, unable to answer her question, unable to admit the truth they both knew.

“People will do the stupidest things for love,” Pan pouted, a fake mournful tone to his voice.

“You did this!” Emma growled but Killian grabbed her arm, stopping her.

“Actually, he did it to himself,” Pan shrugged, an unconcerned smile on his face. “You saw it, he took out his own heart, but don’t worry, it’s in a safe place.” He patted his chest with a smug grin.

Unable to look at Pan’s face anymore, Killian turned back to the boy. He looked like he was simply asleep, like he would wake at any moment. But Killian knew he wouldn’t. He felt Emma’s anger-fueled grief under his grip as he heard Pan take a deep satisfying breath.

“I finally have the Heart and now the world will be my Neverland!” Pan held out his arms in triumph. “Thank him for me. I’m sure you’ll be seeing him soon enough.” 

Killian let go of Emma’s wrist as his hand went to the boy’s chest, feeling the still chest when his own heart was hammering against his. It wasn’t fair.

“Take my heart.” Emma’s words matched his own as they both spoke at the same time, the same expressions on their faces - determination and hope.

Killian glanced towards Pan, hoping the villain was too distracted to stop them. He stood a few feet away focused only on the new power in his chest and the bright golden light of his stolen magic, victorious.

“Emma,” Killian started in a quiet voice. “I promised to return you to your parents. If we’re going to use anyone’s heart, it should be mine.”

Emma shook her head. “No, I won’t take you from his life. You’re too important to him.”

“So are you!”

“I don’t even know if this will work for us and then you will have died for nothing.”

“If it’s to save Henry, it won’t be for nothing.”

They looked at each other, their faces both stubborn and hopeful.

“Together?” she asked, her voice wobbly.

“Emma-”

“We’ve done everything together since we met, Killian. We should do this together, too.” 

Killian took a deep breath, focusing on her green eyes. He nodded and the way they brightened with hope was enough for him to nod more vigorously.

“Together.”

Emma laid her hand on his chest, but where there had been confidence, now there was fear. “I’ve never done this before.” 

He placed his hand over her wrist. “I believe in you.”

Emma nodded and pushed her hand into his chest. He stifled a grunt of pain when she pulled it back out. He hadn’t expected the surprisingly red heart that she now held in her hand, a small dark blob in the center of it. Maybe he wasn’t as lost as he thought. 

The world was dull around them and there was a feeling of emptiness in his chest. He still felt the love for the two people in front of him but it felt muted. 

She took a deep breath as she looked between his heart and him before she plunged her own hand inside her chest. With her own groan of pain, she removed her hand, now holding a bright red heart.

“Hmm, I should split them.”

“Aye, that should work.” A weak chuckle made the corner of her lips rise.

Emma placed her heart confidently in his hand. Killian held it reverently as she focused on his. He felt the magic in her fingers, her careful grip, like a warm fire in his chest. Her heart beat fast in his hand and he hoped she felt the same warmth that he felt.

He winced when she finally jerked her hands, successfully splitting his heart. “That was interesting.”

“I’m sorry.” Her eyes were wide in concern.

Killian shook his head. “We need to hurry.” 

They traded hearts and he held on to his split heart as Emma focused on hers. He glanced at Pan to see him floating a foot off the ground, hands raised. Killian noticed how the courtyard appeared darker, despite the high sun in the sky. He watched as a couple of shadows already circled Pan’s feet. They really needed to hurry and get out of there.

He heard her whimper and turned to see her holding her halved heart. She quickly placed one half back in her chest, a shiver running down her body as she got used to the feeling.

“Now, you.” 

She grabbed one half of his heart and placed it in his chest. It was a strange feeling. It was a relief to be able to feel again, no longer the muted experience of before, but there was still a sense of being incomplete, of something missing.

They looked at each other, an unspoken question between them. He nodded.

He held his breath as Emma joined both halves together, as they stitched themselves to form a complete heart. They took a deep breath when it worked. Their surroundings were darkening and the glowing red heart was like a beacon.

Killian grabbed Emma’s wrist. Their hands holding the constructed heart hovered over Henry’s chest and with a last deep breath, they pushed.

“Fight, my boy.”

“Come back to us.”

It felt like years before Henry took a gasping breath. A powerful wave of multicolored energy passed through them and then they heard it.

“No!”

Pan’s scream caught their attention and they watched as he came back to earth, turned towards them, and began to approach with angry steps before falling to his knees. A bright beacon began to form on his chest and Pan’s screams turned from fury into pain. 

They watched, dumbfounded, as Pan burned from the inside out until there was nothing but ash where he once stood. He wouldn’t be missed. They looked up as the midday sun began to shine brightly in the sky again.

“Henry?” Emma called softly, her voice watery.

The boy finally opened his eyes. Glancing between the two adults, he seemed to understand exactly what just happened. His lips curled in a small smile.

“Guess I have another great story to tell, huh?”

Emma let out a startled laugh before she pulled Henry into a tight hug, Killian shaking his head amusedly before joining. They all took a collective breath.

Killian could feel his beating heart echo, feeling twice the love, no longer incomplete. He cupped Henry’s head and placed a kiss on his forehead, completely unconcerned over his wobbly voice.

“We thought we lost you, my boy.” 

“But you didn’t lose hope.” Henry smiled before burrowing his face in Emma’s neck.

Emma chuckled, running her fingers through the boy’s hair. “We learned from the best.”

Henry is the first to break the hug but he doesn’t go far, his hands holding each adult’s arm in a tight grip. “I love you.”

Killian shouldn’t have been surprised by the sentiment, considering the great lengths they had all gone for each other in the time they’ve known each other, but it’s still surprising to see someone give their love so instantly, so freely. His heart felt too large for his chest even with its reduced size, but he cherishes it.

Emma’s smile widened and she stroked his face. “We love you, too.”

“You know we do. I’m sure you can feel it.” Killian tapped the boy’s chest with his hook, with a smile.

Henry smiled widely, eyes watering before nodding vigorously and pulling them both close for another hug. Killian can only hope to feel this love everyday for the rest of his life.

“Are you all alright?” 

The familiar female voice broke their quiet moment. Not giving up much of their personal space, the three of them turned to see the Queen approaching slowly with a steadier Lancelot, his arm around her shoulders.

Killian took a deep breath. “Aye, and I’m pleased to see you safe and sound as well.”

“We wanted to help, bu-” 

“This was our battle,” Emma interrupted Lancelot’s apology with a kind smile. “You two were in no shape to fight.”

“Besides,” Henry turned to them with a smile of his own. “Camelot needs its queen safe and sound.”

Despite the Queen’s smile, they could all see the guilt in the furrow of her brow. “I knew he was obsessed with the prophecy, but I always thought I would have my Arthur back.” She paused for a moment. “I never thought he was so…mad.”

“Gwen,” Lancelot interrupted. “Arthur was lost to us a long time ago. We tried our best to help him, he just wouldn’t listen.”

Killian stood first before he helped Emma and Henry stand next to him. “He’s right, there was nothing any of us could do.”

“Pan is- was a demon, he corrupted whatever good Arthur had in his heart. Like he does to all things.” 

Emma’s tone had Killian placing his hand on her arm, Henry leaning back against her in a gesture of comfort. 

Gwen nodded, wiping her tears. “Now, Camelot can return to its former glory.”

“With a wonderful Queen to rule it,” Lancelot added with a soft smile.

As Gwen’s cheeks reddened, Killian turned away with an amused smile mimicked by Emma, while Henry watched them with bright eyes. Killian’s eyes found Emma’s and he cherished the reddish hue on her own cheeks.

Gwen cleared her throat hoping to move away from the moment but they noticed the way her hand found Lancelot’s as she did. “We would like to thank you. If there’s anything you need…”

“We wanna know where to find Merlin,” Henry burst out, Killian’s hand on his shoulder doing little to ease his excitement.

The way Gwen and Lancelot looked at each other quickly told Killian and Emma that they wouldn’t find the answers they hoped for there.

“Merlin has never been here.”

“At least, not while we’ve lived here.”

Henry’s silence was deafening and he looked up at his two companions with a worried frown.

Killian sighed as he squeezed the boy’s shoulder in comfort. “Do you know where we can find him?” 

Gwen was quiet for a moment. “When we were children, Arthur used to speak to a tree in the kingdom grounds that he believed Merlin had been trapped in. That’s where he was told of the prophecies.”

“When he came into power, he cut down every tree around the castle grounds. So even if Merlin had been here, I suspect he no longer is…”

Killian nodded, trying not to let his frustration show.

“We should carry on our way, then. There’s still a lot we need to do,” Emma answered with a tight smile.

“Are you sure we can’t give you anything? You can rest here, eat.” Gwen frowned.

Killian felt Henry’s questioning stare on his face but ignored it. “We should really get going, but thank you.”

They made quick work of grabbing their things and walked out of the kingdom’s gates under the confused stares of the Queen and her knight. Both Emma and Killian ignored Henry’s confusion until they were a safe distance from the castle. By then, the Camelot people were leaving their houses with questioning gazes and curious questions. 

“Why did we leave so fast?” Henry finally asked.

“We don’t know them, lad.”

“They might not have been on Arthur or Pan’s side but there are always dangers around,” Emma added, holding on to Henry’s hand as they made their way through the crowds.

“But they were good people, we could have asked them what they know.”

“We did, and they didn’t know anything, lad. They were victims just like us and they now have to deal with a whole kingdom wanting answers.”

“So where are we supposed to go now?”

Killian and Emma were quiet at that. The truth was they didn’t know. This was the first time they didn’t know where to go. Pan was defeated, that should have been the final piece.

“You don’t know, do you?” Henry asked with a raised eyebrow and a smile creeping up on his face.

“Well,” Emma stuttered, causing Henry to chuckle and Killian to smile. “I know we need to get to Avalon…”

“We just don’t know how to get there,” Killian finished with a teasing smile.

“It’s not like Cygnus is available to give us directions.” Emma gestured towards the bright afternoon sky pointedly.

Henry laughed. They had reached the town proper. They stood in the middle of the emptying market, everyone had followed the news towards the castle, only the merchants left behind, worried over leaving their wares. 

“We should find somewhere to wait until evening,” Killian told his companions. It was the only permission Henry needed to begin exploring the market under their watchful eye. “We’ll check for Cygnus then.”

“I agree.” He watched Emma’s smile from the corner of his eye and couldn't help but match it.

They could breathe now. Their journey wasn’t over but they defeated Pan. Henry was alive and so were they. The more he looked at her and the more he heard Henry bombarding questions at the merchants, the happier he was for being with them now, for having made the decision to protect Henry when they first met.

Her eyes found his and his breath hitched in his chest. Their last conversation played through his mind. They hadn’t reached Avalon yet, but after what they just went through, a part of him didn’t want to hold back any longer.

“Emma-”

“Killian-” 

They spoke at the same time, pausing to look at each other with a shy smile.

“You go first,” Emma allowed with a nod.

“Emma, I-”

He'd recognise that ship anywhere. The rigging he climbed time and time again, the hull he begged to help clean with Starkey while they flew forty thousand feet in the sky. The ship he tried to escape from so many times. The ship that turned out to be the home he never had.

Nemo would be there. He would be there and so would his disappointed eyes. His anger. At that moment, he felt just like the troubled teen he hadn't been in a long time.

Emma looked at him with expectant and confused eyes as his silence and stupefied expression lasted longer and longer. He looked once more at the ship but saw no familiar faces looking out but that wouldn’t always be true.

“We need to go.”

“What?” Emma frowned, defensiveness taking over.

“Where’s Henry?” Killian looked around. “Henry!” The boy’s dark head of hair quickly turned to where they stood in confusion. “We need to go now.” 

“What happened?” Henry asked as he approached. “Is someone after us?”

“Killian Jones!”

The familiar booming voice echoed through the emptied market. Emma turned around first to see an imposing figure in a pristine naval outfit. From the corner of his eye, he noticed the man’s crossed arms. Killian wasn’t sure he could face an expression of sorrow on the face of the man he considered a father. 

“I have been looking for you.”

#parent for hire #carolina writes #the actual big villain fight #shtuff happens #tw character death #killian jones #captain hook #emma swan #henry mills #captain swan #captainswan #once upon a time #ouat #captaincobra #captaincobraswan #king arthur #peter pan #cs ff

[yanderegremlin]

okay but imagine saitama and genos reaction to y/n saying that child emperor is their hero / favorite hero!! I feel like they’d be like wait what? what about us :(

Warnings: Yandere, fighting, injuries mentioned, manipulation, helicopter "parents",

Other tags: one punch man, reader insert, Child reader, Child Emperor(Isamu), Saitama, Genos, 

It was a peacefully sunny day when Genos got a phone call from the school. It shocked him to his core to hear that you got into a fight, for a moment he thought they got the wrong number until read him your file. He just doesn't understand why you got into a fight of all things.

It was a good thing Saitama was out getting groceries because Genos would have to hold him back from putting a hole through the entire school. Genos was holding himself back from tearing apart whoever thought they could hurt you and get away with it.

Genos thanked them and head over as quicky as posable, unfortunately Genos quite literally ran into Saitama, who in turn was confused as to why Genos was in such a big hurry. "Hey, slow down Genos you act like someone dead or something"

The look Saitama got from Genos didn't help, if anything it concerned him more. "She got into a fight at school, I'm just on my way to get her. I just know that little brat has something to do with it."

Genos didn't need to say any thing else, because that the mention of the Child hero and you got Saitama to drop what he was currying, weeping Genos off his feet and dashing your school in a heartbeat. Genos barely got to sign in that the front desk because of the way Saitama was dragging him towards the principal's office.

The thing that stopped them both in there tracts was the sound of your giggles, obviously you were okay and in no danger in you were having fun. What they did see was Isamu was the one who witnessed the fight you were in. Of course he stepped in to protect you, getting himself in trouble as well. It was totally worth it to send some extra alone time with you.

"haha Isamu, stop it. Of course your my Hero! You save me, when no one else would." you hugged him not knowing you might as well have carved their hearts out of them. You only let go of Child Emperor after someone patting your head, looking over your shoulder you see robo papa stand there with giving you a small smile and grandpa boldy who was patting your head with a constrained smile. 

“Ready to go munchkin? we pick up some ice-cream and your favorite meal on our way home.” Genos reached out his hand. nether him or Saitama acknowledged the young hero as they took you away and back home after replacing the groceries Saitama lost and get you a dessert as they look you over for any and all injuries.

The only problem now they have to worry about is how to tell you that you’ll be home school and finding the right people to teach you when they can’t do it themselves. 

Little did they know that this was all part of Isamu plan to slowly but surely to get you on his side. Set you up, even it was one of the hardest things he had to do and watch. he know in the long run it would be for your own good.

#tw yandere #platonic yandere #romantic yandere #x reader #x you #x y/n #yandere one punch man #yandere opm #yandere isamu #yandere child emperor #yandere Genos #yandere saitama #fighting #injuries mentioned #tw manipulation #helicopter parents

[psychologeek]

Your defense of Israel murdering or displacing all the Palestinians is disgusting.

You defend the government’s actions over the whole course of its existence and deny is subjugation and occupation of Palestine.

Israel is a colonist nation. Regardless of who your ancestors are from thousands of years ago, you do not get to go to another country and forcefully expel its current population out of some inane sense of birthright.

I am African American. My ancestors were stolen from their homelands, sold to slavers, and shipped across the sea where then endured torture in every meaning of the word for generations. The African American community is still recovering.

But that in no way gives me the right to return to the African country of my ancestors and demand that whoever lives there (and has lived there for centuries) leaves and gives their land to me so I can make a new country. And I’m talking about a crime that happened only 300 years ago, not thousands.

The Israel government is currently committing war crimes at unprecedented levels in modern times. And their only goal is to expel all Palestinian from Gaza (and the West Bank). They don’t care about the hostages, they just want land.

October 7th does not exist in a vacuum. Even if it did it would not justify the thousands of children that have been murdered as a result. Over the course of 75 years of occupation Israel have murdered countless children and other innocents, all far before October 7th.

Antisemitism is an incredibly serious problem in the world. But antizionism is not antisemitism. What right do westerners, regardless of who their ancestors were and regardless of what they have been through, to forcefully claim an already occupied plot of land in the Middle East. The answer is none. If they do so they are colonizers. Just like if I were to forcefully claim land in Africa today I would be a colonizer.

Real nazis exist. White supremacist exist. And many of them actual support Israel because they recognize it as a facist state that kills brown people.

True antisemitism exists and it is being largely ignored so Zionists can attack Palestinians and other Arabs for refusing to give their own land to Western transplants.

You should reflect on the empathy you have for Israel soldiers and the lack of empathy you have for the Palestinian children (the nearly 10,000) who have been blown up, shot, and starved to death of the course of the last few months.

You justify their deaths at every corner and talk about the fear of violence you feel, but not the actual violence they endure.

You have the nerve to write about a complicated middle eastern child like Damian when if he were real, you would be justifying his murder at the hands of western fascists.

Anon,

first of all - I do have to thank u for taking it to my Tumblr instead of the comment section on ao3. I appreciate it.

For those interested - this is the fic anon refers to at the end of the comment, when saying "You have the nerve to write about a complicated middle eastern child like Damian"

TL;DR:

Me (literally was a Middle Eastern child who grew up to be a ME adult, and have a complicated family relationship)

me: writing "Hi, Intifada is actually a bad thing. Bombs are blind, you know" in my A/N of one of my fics.

Anon from the USA: HOW DARE YOU VIOLENT WHITE FACIST!!!!!

me: ?_?

*********

now for the actual reply!

1."Your defense of Israel murdering or displacing all the Palestinians is disgusting."

Where, exactly, did I say I support murder/displacement of people?

(And yes, I mean ANY people)

2. "You defend the government’s actions over the whole course of its existence"

Umm, what?

I definitely disagree with (many many MANY) things the government did. 'over the whole course of its existence' - wow. You really went on with it, huh?

3. "and deny is subjugation and occupation of Palestine."

"subjugation, occupation " - again, what?

And, how do you enslave a LAND?

That is a very interesting claim you're making here.

(Not to mention that, Palestine was the COLONIAL name of the reign. But who cares?)

4. "Israel is a colonist nation."

Do you know what "colonist" means?

I'll give you a hint - it requires having a country in a first place, and expending.

5. "Regardless of who your ancestors are from thousands of years ago"

No, but you see - it DOES matter.

That statement means that heritage doesn't matter. That 'homeland' has an expiring date.

A. Since many of those who consider themselves Palestinians today do it bc THEIR ancestors lived in the reign, it is a crucial thing. And an interesting claim.

B. Does it apply to other places as well? I mean, are you also against "land back" and independence for Puerto Rico (which is, btw, ANOTHER colonial name).

C. There have always been Jews in Israel. Judaism (which comes from "Judea" - you know, the old southern Jewish kingdom? in the Jerusalem area?

6. "you do not get to go to another country and forcefully expel its current population out of some inane sense of birthright."

I agree. I don't support any expel for anyone. I believe there's enough place for anyone that wants to live IN PEACE. About 20% of Israel's population are Arabs-Israelis. I had Muslim roommate in the past, and where I study, about 25% of my class are Muslims.

7. "I am African American. My ancestors were stolen from their homelands, sold to slavers, and shipped across the sea where then endured torture in every meaning of the word for generations."

Yes. So were my ancestors. (Guess who built the Collosum?) And my people are still being harrased and murdered.

7. "The African American community is still recovering."

So does the Jewish population worldwide.

8. "But that in no way gives me the right to return to the African country of my ancestors and demand that whoever lives there (and has lived there for centuries) leaves and gives their land to me so I can make a new country."

There is no demand for anyone to leave.

About the "lived here for centuries" claim :

In the first quarter of the 19th century, Israel population was about 250k (about 25% Jews.)

overall population according to year. origin mentioned.

Then, in 1948, the arab population in Israel was 1,237,000 (67%) and the Jewish population was 608,000 (33%).

for example, main cities population 1860-1946:

Jerusalem (over all, Jews, Muslims, Christians) ,Jaffa (over all, Jews, Muslims, Christians), Haifa (over all, Jews, Muslims, Christians)

Same origin also cites a lot of immigration (mostly from Egypt and Lebanon).

****

[So, you go by the right of conquer? as in "if you live there, then it's yours"? So, do you support the Jewish return to Hebron (Jewish community constantly, until 1929.) and Gaza (same)?]

Of course that you, as a single person, can't do that. May I remind you of decision 181 of the UN? about 2-state solution?

In fact, the first accords, the UN ones? said "we'll give 80% of the land to 70% of the population" (Arabs) "and 20% of the land to 30% of the population"

Jews said: ok!

Arabs said: umm. Nope. We want everything, or there'll be blood.

You can probably read about what happened to the Jews that were left in Gush Etzion and other off-border Jews after Israel declared independence.

[Why am I using the term "Arab" and not "Palestinian"? well, that's what they called themselves:]

Arab leaders like Auni Bey Abdul-Hadi told the Peel Commission in 1937: "There is no such country as 'Palestine'; 'Palestine' is a term the Zionists invented!" During the 1930s, anti-British and anti-Jewish riots were enflamed by the newly created "Arab Higher Committee,"( Arab - not Palestinian!) the central political organ of the Arab community of Mandate Palestine .In 1946, Arab historian Philip Hitti testified before the Anglo-American Committee of Inquiry that "there is no such thing as Palestine in history.” In 1947, Arab leaders protesting the UN partition plan argued that Palestine was part of Syria and “politically, the Arabs of Palestine (were) not (an) independent separate … political entity.” In 1947, the UN proposed a "Jewish" State and an "Arab" (again, not Palestinian) State.

9. "And I’m talking about a crime that happened only 300 years ago, not thousands."

Yes. If you want to know why the Jewish population is/was suspicious about living under arab/muslim authorities, feel free to look up the Hebron massacre (and ethnic cleansing - the eareser of the Jewish people in 1929. Also the EC of the Jewish community in Gaza in 1929, several exiles before. Also massacre of Zfad 'what year?' - ALL OF THEM).

And that before mentioning the EC of jews from MENA countries - arab/Muslims countries (there's a nice song about it. Feel free to listen.)

10. "The Israeli government is currently committing war crimes at unprecedented levels in modern times."

Uhm.

The Holocaust? Buko Haram? Hamas? Iran-Balochistan? dam, SYRIA?? Hello?

Funny how EVERYTHING can, all of a sudden, become "the worst thing in modern history".

(There are, probably, war crimes going on. Which is terrible, and should NOT happen, and there's a lot of ppl in Israel calling against it. But just bc you don't like something, or bc it's bad, doesn't mean it's a war crime.)

11. "And their only goal is to expel all Palestinian from Gaza (and the West Bank)."

No, hun. I'm sorry you fell for the propaganda.

Their goal is to return the quiet to the area. Since, you know, we STILL HAVE MISSILES FIRED AT CIVILIAN AREAS as had been in the 20+ last years. Not to mention terror attacks (hi, remember the 07/10?) And THE KIDNAPPED PEOPLE, MOSTLY CIVILIANS.

(Which is a WAR CRIME, btw. In relation to no.10).

12. "They don’t care about the hostages,"

I'm sorry, what?

Right. You say it as... someone who never been in Israel, and get news from Al Jazeera (funded by the same ppl who fund Hamas), I guess.

(Literally some of those who currently fight has family and friends that were kidnapped.)

Though, about the government - idk. I honestly lost any try to understand what the current PM trying to do.

13. "they just want land."

Of course. Which is EXACTLY why Israel has tried to make peace agreements 5 times before, willing to give away land. EXACTLY why Israel had exiled every last jew from Gaza Strip in 2005, during the disengagement. Exactly why, during the peace agreements with Egypt, Israel gave away Sinai (which is about the size of the rest of Israel.)

14. "October 7th does not exist in a vacuum."

Love this comment. Such a great idea.

I bet you'd say the same thing about Floyd, won't you?

I mean, it didn't happen in a VACCUM. That officer felt threatened and I'm sure he was very sad afterwards.🥺🥺

15. "Even if it did it would not justify the thousands of children that have been murdered as a result."

aaaannd we reach the part of PROPAGANDA. I'll be honest, I'm tired of it.

I'll only say - according to international law, and the laws of war (LoW), hiding in civil population is a WAR CRIME. So is using child soldiers, hiding HQ and ammunition under hospitals, religious places, schools, and kindergartens.

16. "Over the course of 75 years of occupation Israel have murdered countless children and other innocents, all far before October 7th.

check your resources about: 75 years. "murder countless children"

Antisemitism is an incredibly serious problem in the world. But antizionism is not antisemitism. What right do Westerners, regardless of who their ancestors were and regardless of what they have been through, to forcefully claim an already occupied plot of land in the Middle East. The answer is none. If they do so they are colonizers. Just like if I were to forcefully claim land in Africa today I would be a colonizer. Real nazis exist. White supremacist exist."

Love that you claim me to be westerner and\or white, as I'm neither. Go back to no.8. Jews ALWAYS lived here. wanting a state, when *all countries in the area started becoming their own countries* isn't the problem. Claiming that only THAT country has no right to exist - yes, it is antisemitic, sorry. Or are you also against Syria, Egypt, Lebanon, Jordan, etc. as their own countries?

Also - not forcefully. UN decision.

"Real nazis exist. White supremacist exist." - funny how they BOTH agree that Israel is bad. Almost like they have 1 thing in common

(Hint: this isn't a strong urge for world peace)

"And many of them actually support Israel because they recognize it as a facist state that kills brown people."

- Dog whistle!

"Jews are white killing brown ppl" + "jews are the REAL nazis"

"True antisemitism exists and it is being largely ignored so Zionists can attack Palestinians and other Arabs for refusing to give their own land to Western transplants."

"Jews are white colonisers that came to kill all the nice PoC who lived peacefully!

"You should reflect on the empathy you have for Israel soldiers and the lack of empathy you have for the Palestinian children (the nearly 10,000) who have been blown up, shot, and starved to death of the course of the last few months."

- you don't care about the kids!!!!

(Israelis are soldiers and murderous, VS. the Palestinians who are all innocent kids who did nothing.) don't care about the Israeli ones).

"You justify their deaths at every corner and talk about the fear of violence you feel, but not the actual violence they endure."

- YOU ARE VIOLENT! How dare you say you want ACTUAL peace, one that includes NO ONE being targeted by missiles??

[Can you, in your OWN WORDS, say what are "Nazism", "Facism", and "Zionism"? bc one of those isn't like the others.]

"You have the nerve to write about a complicated middle eastern child like Damian when if he were real, you would be justifying his murder at the hands of western fascists."

- Wow. How dare I, a Middle Eastern who grew up in a complicated family, write about a Middle Eastern child who grew up in a complicated area and complicated family situation?

really, SHAME on me!

But sure-

The problem is that I write about Damian, a FICTIONAL CHARACTER, and not that actual, real life, ppl suffer.

The problem is that I dare say "Yo, ppl, calling for Intifada, aka TERROR ATTACKS (that killed EVERYONE - Jews, Muslims, Christians, etc.) is bad and violent. Of course. No matter that rise in violence is destructive and harmful to EVERYONE.

I see you came here through my fanfic. Fanfic that part of it was trying to get more comfortable with my grandma's old culture and language. And the other part was about educating myself more about religion I'm not familiar enough with, and reminding myself that people are people. (Hoping that knowing and understanding would help me coup with my own personal prejudice and trauma, as I keep seeing the faces of the dead I knew and keep dreaming about the baby from the terror attack when I was a kid and keep feeling the ground shaking, even though I'm no longer a child in an unprotected area when all I could do was lay on the ground and pray the missiles won't fall near me)

Let me ask you something -

I was born in Israel, and so did my parents, and so did THEIR parents (except for a grandma who immigrated as a toddler from Yemen. Yes, that country that just exiled the last Jewish family in 2022, current Jewish population: 1. That Yemen.)

And it seems like you have never even been to this continent. Never had to run to shelter. Doesn't have baby photos with gas masks, or know how to find the "as protected as possible" area (since not every place has a shelter) -

so you, a random anon, who doesn't really know anything about an ongoing war\conflict that affects many lives, come and criticise me for calling for no more violence.

Let me ask you something -

What gives you the right?

#israel #palestine #psy reply #anon #sweet dreams au #asks #intifada is a bad thing #idk why ppl think calling for death is a good thing #tw: dog whistle and general popular antisemism #October 7th does not exist in a vacuum #face palm #fun #childhood memories #childhood memories of war #growing up in “conflict” #hobestly it's like growing up with parents always fighting #no matter what happens #you always gets hurt #not based on my personal ewperience i say #you know #like a lier #damian wayne

[theabyssgazesalsointoyou]

to me the beauty(?) of royal pains is. chloe is of course the most toxic gf with all sorts of issues you couldn't even imagine while jake seems all well-composed and able to deal with her shit. however the truth is that he is not, in fact, able to deal with her shit. he's just as if not even more unhinged than her.

#this gets dark so. i'll elaborate in the tags instead of the post. tw suicide mention in the following tags >> #some time after jake's parents leave and his mental health plummets they get in a fight #chloe is drunk and yells at jake to kill himself and jake grabs a bottle of her perfume and raises it to his lips #like 'yeah okay sure i will. fuck you.' out of pure spite. and chloe screams again but this time out of horror #and she doesn't know how to deescalate the situation so she's just like 'you fucking idiot that won't kill you put it down' #but jake is high as hell and passively suicidal at this point. he's like 'how do you know that?? let's find out huh??' #she has to wrestle the bottle from him like she's taking something a dog shouldn't eat from its jaws #when they sober up they never speak of the fight again. chloe does not suicide-bait jake again and jake does not threaten suicide again #but they are very aware of how toxic they are capable of being #oh boy i can't believe all this came out of me trying to figure out if royal pains would fit into a silly meme #bmc #be more chill #royal pains #chloe valentine #jake dillinger

[fairycosmos]

anyway it’s like, when you’re predisposed to addiction it feels like youre swimming against the tide your whole life anyway and it’s fruitless

#2 alcoholic parents and a sister who died from drugs.....girl dont even act like it's worth a shot to try and fight it lmfao #tw addiction

[somethingsomethingcomic]

deadnamed at my father's funeral

#parental death tw #family death tw #not sure how else to tag this one #yeah december was a very rough month for me :))) #i actually drew this on the way to my hometown a couple days after i got the news that my dad had passed away #fully anticipating that one of the grueling parts of the process would be the incessant deadnaming and misgendering #bc my dad himself never once used my right name after i came out to him. not once #i asked and we even got in fights about it! bc he just REFUSED to do it #didnt want to think of me as a man at all. i was his only daughter and his baby girl and he didnt wanna accept that id changed #in that way #but i do know bc his wife told me that despite not really accepting the truth about my identity #he was very glad that i seemed happy about it #so i think thats whatll be important to me about it #he didnt get it and didnt really accept it for himself but he was happy that i was happy #anyway it was indeed annoying at the service but more people were chill about it than i expected #and i also had to deal with fewer people than i thought i would #was talking to one of his old band friends who i vaguely remembered and joked that 'i was a girl last time u saw me' #and he said 'youre still a girl' and i just went 'no i am not. the sideburns beg to differ.' #then at the end of the service when people were leaving he came and asked for my New name and when i told him #he was like 'ok ill try to remember that' #i like to think he realized instantly the faux pas he made and was like Yikes. This Is Her/His Dads Funeral. Maybe I Should Be Cool. #anyway. the whole affair was exhausting but i got some nice things out of it too #like hanging out w my brothers #then we got home and me and my wife both had covid bc life wasnt done kicking me in the dick i guess! #im good now i think tho. its fine its fine its fine

[gnzma]

"reminder that i'm like. a hitman. but specifically for your shitty parents.

i'll beat 'em up and give their spouse a better partner if one of them ain't bad-"

#❌|| ʏ'ᴀʟʟ ᴀʀᴇ sᴛᴜᴘɪᴅ! 💀 dash commentary ||❌ #parental fighting tw

[rainbowcrowley]

so in a desperate attempt to not be alone and feel lonely this weekend i fled to my parents' house... which is always a gamble i tell you

but it's been nice, so far. my hometown is stuffy and small and so boring, but i kinda need that rn. i'm also gonna meet some friends i haven't seen in person for a while tomorrow, so that's something eh

#addi.txt #personal #tw parent mention #like. it's not the best situation but i prefer it over constantly fighting Bad Thoughts and dissociation any day of the week lol

[zoeyslament]

Oh yeah want some Noel angst? Here take some Noel angst.

This was it. He was 11 years old and finally ready to tell his parents these feelings he’d had for years, for as long as he could remember. He gathered all his courage and stepped into the living room, greeted by his parents’ faces.

“So…mom, dad…” he gulped. “I just wanted to tell you that…I don’t…I don’t like girls. I like boys.”

The loving looks on his parents’ faces turned to outrage in his father’s case, fear in his mothers. She urged him to get away.

He scrambled away to his room, listening as his father screamed and yelled at his mother. Some of the words said were new to him, but he KNEW they were offensive.

“I will NOT be raising some fairy boy as my son.” He heard his father say. And then, the door slammed.

Now, at age 18, that was the last of his father Noel had seen in 7 years.

#rtc #ride the cyclone #noel gruber #tw abuse #(kinda) #tw fighting #tw parental issues

[ameliora-j]

eddie’s the type of boyfriend that will come and pick you up when your parents are arguing and drive you around in his van all night, playing your favorite music till you fall asleep with your head rested against his bicep. he doesn’t even mind when his arm starts to go numb from the weight of your head. he simply turns the music lower and uses his leg to steady the wheel as he covers you with his jacked so that you won’t get cold. he keeps completely still, not even moving a fraction of an inch as a smile graces his lips. soft snores fall from you as your chest rises and falls slowly. the street lights illuminating your face as he loons away for a second to press a soft kiss to your head. he loves you. more than anything in this entire world. and he’d do absolutely anything for you. even if it meant staying up driving around untill 5am so that you’re home before your parents ever realize that you left, and you can sleep peacefully against his arm. eddie munson is your angel on earth

#nani.headcanons #eddie munson #eddie munson headcanon #eddie munson baby blurb #eddie munson drabble #tw fighting #tw family problems #tw parents arguing

[furiousgoldfish]

(tw death threats)

I struggled to feel as if my fear was rational in the situations where the parents would threaten me, but never quite followed up on a threat. There are always excuses and defense for the abusers when they do this, like, ‘I’ll kill you’ was obviously a joke, they didn’t mean it!’ or ‘you just took it seriously, they never meant to actually hurt you’.

But what I felt at the time of the threat, was absolute terror and conviction that it would happen, because my parents did a lot of traumatic stuff without even threatening it, and it was hard to believe their threats were jokes or something they didn’t mean; the air around them was cold and lethal, and I could often feel the intent, the hatred and the desire to harm. They in fact, looked as if they were only barely restraining themselves from physically ending me.

So why is it so terrifying if the parents didn’t actually ‘mean’ it, and am I unreasonably being trapped in flashbacks where I feel like I’m about to be killed, if my parents never actually meant to do it?

The threats they make are never just for jokes, they’re meant to establish control. They knew the threat would make me freeze in terror, and then they would be able to get me to do anything, get away with anything, or stop me from doing anything or saying anything, because I would be in the fight-flight-freeze-fawn response, and wouldn’t be able to do anything that risks my getting alive out of there.

I realized today that it’s not much different from being held at a gunpoint. The person holding a gun might not actually plan to shoot, they might have completely different plans and have no intention of killing you at that moment. But for you, it doesn’t matter. You’re held at a gunpoint. You can feel your life ending at any second. You can’t risk a movement, a sound, or a twitch that would cause it to happen. The person holding a gun can control you completely, because you’re trapped in your survival response. They have the means to end your life, and are threatening it. You are controlled against your will, with your life hanging above your head. Whether they mean to shoot or not, does not mandate whether you have the right to be traumatized by it, you’re traumatized by default, from being held in a death threat. It’s exactly what they want you to be, terrified out of your mind, believing you’re about to die, so that they can take control of your actions and get whatever they want out of you.

So it doesn’t matter if the abusers didn’t have an intent to follow thru. The threat for you was real, just as was your survival response that allowed them control. Every single threat is real to you, even the one they said laughing, even the one they claim later was a joke. They didn’t say it for no reason. They wanted for you to be threatened and unable to escape from their control.

#tw death threats #abusive parents #psychological abuse #child abuse #abused child #cptsd #tw gunpoint #threatened child #fight flight freeze fawn #ptsd