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#tw mentions of not eating enough
heroesbyler · 1 year
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Hopper's body issues and the subversion of tropes in Stranger Things
Hello lovely peopleee. Let's talk about Hopper and his overarching arc, mainly from s2 to 4, about his confidence, his body issues, and his relationship with food.
(I know this is a difficult topic for many, and I also know my opinion on this is a little controversial, as I've seen many people viewing Hop's situation in a writers-fault-no-meaning-fatphobia way, and I disagree wholeheartedly. There's discussion of disordered eating and body issues. Dead dove etc)
Firstly, the character of Hopper as he is established in s1 is this hardcore, scary cop that has a tragic backstory and actually cares about Joyce, about Benny, about finding Will, but his exterior to people that don't know him is guarded and a bit of a facade. He is our manly tm man for sure, but he also has a loving and sensitive side. However, we get to see that unfold more in subsequent seasons, especially through his relationships with El.
What we also get to touch on Hop's letting go of himself : he's drinking a lot as stated by his ex-wife asking if he's been drinking, he's smoking a lot. We also get to hear more of this later on.
When we find Hop in s2, there's an interesting addition to his mental health struggles : a fixation on food, eating , weight , health and his appearance. When we first see Hop in s1, he's eating a donut : classic cop-on-tv stuff, a trope. It's interesting that in s2, we get the same, but this time the lady takes out his donut (like she did with his cigarette in s1) to give him an apple. There's been a change; food is now introduced as something others see as harmful to him.
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Soon after that, we get many scenes with dialogue that is absolutely indicative of disordered eating, a fixation on it , an eating disorder. This sort of dialogue is non existent for men in fiction, with very few exceptions; the tough guy with the guns and the badassery has all the textbook signs of an ed.
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So much of his dialogue is used to indicate a negative body image, association of food with guilt, association of food with gaining weight and being unhealthy, and in general. It's not a "mocking/for laughs" kind of coding as I've seen discussed. If it had been a very skinny girl saying these exact words, there would be nobody doubting her ed coding (more on Chrissy later). This isn't a case of the writing being fatphobic, but in another manifestation of self hatred from a character already shown to use a number of different ways to numb his own pain.
In fact , the writing gives us a pretty distinct look into the fact that Hop has a bad relationship with food, tightly interwoven into his mental health declining (and the idea of restriction=good, indulgence=bad) :
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This could be a funny moment. It is not. Hop is still using food and the indulge/restrict cycle directly to soothe his anxiety over the idea of having to keep El hidden and the danger she's in. He might as well have reached for a drink or a cigarette. This is presented to us as is, but it is in the discretion of the viewer to piece together the information. Will they though? Will they understand that the fat manly badass man has disordered eating patterns? Will they think it's a funny joke, or a barely hidden truth?
Season 3
Season 3 definitely poses on this regard, to show us another one of Hop's vices ; alcoholism. He is presented as a drunk, and again, because of the funny premise of some of the scenes (and frankly, the massive change in tone when it comes to everything in the show in s3) it slips through the cracks again. Not much to say other than that.
Season 4
Season 4 is extremely interesting because it essentially puts EDs on the map as a very valid response to trauma. It also does this in an easily digestible way by anyone; of course the skinny white miss perfect cheerleader has an ed! No one would have to be convinced of that; she's the demographic of EDs in most people's eyes. But ST isn't about the obvious and the ordinary. Chrissy is the decoder key in many ways through her parallels to other characters. And when it comes to EDs specifically, there's 2 characters she parallels closely; Hopper...and Mike (but that one I'm not touching as much here because @aemiron-main will say it at some point better than i ever could, but it's there, undeniably so. sorry<3)
Chrissy's body issues and ED, presumably bulimia, are closely linked and are both part of Vecna's tormenting of her. The word choices for Chrissy are interesting, because the writing matches words used for Hopper,and symbolism around the characters is VERY similar :
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(oh hi Mike. Also, the name Chrissy is literally said in the first scene.)
There's many meta-narrative links between them. We first see Chrissy in the toilet, throwing up , something that afair the only character we've seen consistently do throughout the series is Hop (sparing you the screenshots for that one lol)
And then there is of course the full table of food :
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Same position, same lighting, Enzo's "Is this real, or am i dreaming?" providing a connection to Chrissy's vision, that has been described as dreaming yada yada the girlies that get get it
Also, before the camera focuses on the table, it focuses on this pig head, that is then positioned right next to Hopper, as it is a word associated with him,and as of now, Chrissy:
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In this scene, Hopper proceeds to never eat a single thing , and in fact we get interesting dialogue, as his lack of eating is called wrong, and we are TOLD that he should be told to eat; attention is drawn in his not eating.
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Not only that, but throughout the Russia Plotline, food is a huge part of Hop's arc. The scene of him offering his food to the prisoner to help him starts like this
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(wet sound effects often used to signify something disgusting, such as Vecna's tentacles, but is also used when the Russian prisoners devour the food in the table; food consumption/ food is linked to disgust here) RIGHT AFTER Joyce looks at her airplane food consisting of something with pees with disgust (Hop's speech to El in s2 about eating the pees although they're mushy and gross...)
Hopper's trauma and guilt
Season 4 gives us a piece of information about Hop's trauma that definitely fits with the theme of the season. He's not only devastated that his daughter died. He is rotting with guilt over the fact that he was the reason why that happened; his use of chemicals in a past job was the reason why Sarah got cancer. And not only that, but he knew that happened to other people, and he chose to hide the truth from his wife, resulting in a death. (Reminds you of anyone? Whatshisname? Anyway lol). His self hatred is immense, his guilt over his mistakes and failing to protect the people he loves make him feel like he is the curse. The conscious nature of his involvement in his loved ones torment adds a more devastating tone to his self hatred (working with chemicals, sending the letter to Joyce).
Accepting himself and others' love symbolised by love of food again (+showcasing that the writing/characters are not fatphobic)
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Hop defaulting to negative weight talk to distract from his pain and anguish is never encouraged by his loved ones, who instead focus on him and his well being. Only person that is the first to comment on Hopper's weight (again) is Mike. Gee. Probably a production error!
In fact, we get the meta narrative of Hopper slowly getting over his diet of Chrissy-vision-food-symbolising-EDs (bad mental health, isolation , emotional pain) to dreaming about lasagna at Enzo's (Joyce's love, his family that he built, forgiving himself for his past mistake).
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Conclusion
Hopper's arc of self acceptance in both an in universe body image sense and in a meta forgiveness of self and moving on is very much tied to his relationship with food. Putting him in a forced starvation narrative all but solidifies this motif as a powerful way to enforce the message that everyone could fall victim to this specific situation. Hopper must learn to accept himself in whatever shape he comes in, because to his loved ones, it never was an issue; in a meta sense, Hop leaving behind his guilt and self hatred is essential to his character, and is something we're already seeing start to happen by the time he's reunited with Joyce.
Hopper's inner turmoil presented through an 80s lense, with being sensitive considered queer, and unacceptable, and reaching out for help not even being an option, is a very heartbreaking aspect of his character. It's very human for him to try and keep everything in arm's length so as not to hurt the people he loves,trying to fiercely protect them only because he sees himself as an innate problem in their lives. The outcome of his Russian plotline is that it was in fact ok to ask for help, and I bet that in s5 we'll see Hopper in his original weight, and with no calorie obsession/ weight fixation / alcohol to be found.
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stood-onthecliffside · 6 months
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girl math girl dinner girl logic girl shopping fuck off. we eat fulfilling breakfast, lunch and dinner! and if we are struggling to do this we take our time we understand how bodies are energy machines for us than viewing pleasures and food is important! we are intelligent we are kind we are smart! we may not always make the right choice but that’s okay because we take responsibility and try to learn from our mistakes. we look at pretty stuff in shops and say not right now because our budget doesn’t allow it but next month we will budget it into our finances because we deserve happiness, and we look at that product and it fills with joy. we have a silly little survival drink everyday because we can and we know that curbing our happiness is not going to help anyone, and if that is why we can’t afford basic necessities in this economy (which is so fucking untrue) then so be it. we are growing learning to be happy, we are smart and trying to live!
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uncanny-tranny · 10 months
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"A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips" being said like that's a bad thing. How beautiful is it that the memories and experiences my body has gone through will be etched into me, even if temporary, even if it isn't "flattering"? Why would I want to be alive if it meant that I am not permitted to live? And why should I avoid myself like I am a sin, like I am a curse, worse than death and pain?
I will envelop myself in layers of care and love, even if it means that I am slightly different. I will continue to do so even if I am alone. I have survived long enough. I will rest now, I will find peace.
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1ampro4n4 · 1 year
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body check so far
height: 5’7”
weight: 104 lbs
gw: 96
soooooo far. but good progress. keeping up with the diet and workouts (previously posted) and i’m going down like a dead body on a hill🙂🙂
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puppyeared · 9 months
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How'd Augusta end up being radioactive? :o
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A second chance.
// suicidal themes below
Augusta originally worked as a part time astronaut at a Star Depot, which collected star Fragments and sent them back to earth to be used as fuel similar to nuclear power.
Augusta wasn’t really in a good place at the time while working there. She never had any kind of big ambition in life and wanted to live life peacefully, but knew that “getting by” isn’t enough for her to survive. People around her kept expecting so much of her that she didn’t know what to tell them.
Working as an astronaut helps take her mind off things at first, but then she starts to feel worse. She doesn’t get invited out to things, but she doesn’t really make any effort to try, and relatives are asking how she’s doing and she doesn’t know what to tell them without it turning into a lecture. and over time it piles up
First she starts asking for more shifts handling and shipping the stars. Then she asks to do overtime. And finally one day she finds a tiny Fragment on the floor.
The thing about Fragments is that they change your body and can make you very sick if youre near them for too long.
Tomorrow would be a holiday and the building would be closed. The Shift manager, who promised to close up, left early for drinks with coworkers. So she was the only employee working.
So she picks up the star and swallows it expecting to die. But instead her hair turns pink and the dust around her floats, and when she breathes no air comes out. The Star fused to her body and latched to her heart.
Basically, her suicide attempt gave her her own way to live and pink hair as a bonus lol
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Here’s what her hair looked like before and after The Incident <3
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tiny-pinkmonster · 3 months
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Tw- Sh and Ed mention (no pics)
Here I go wasting all my progress after months of trying my hardest not to sh again. Ate all day, gained weight, so here I am.
Had to break a fucking pencil sharpener because that’s all I could find
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boycattj · 10 months
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how do people . do work. hang out w others. and have time to themselves. and still remember to eat/drink . i dont understand
#um . tw for describing my eating habits in the tags ? ig idk >#and tw for ed mentions cuz i have that also >#also weight stuff since thats a part of it >#but . i guess ive been realizing truly how Little i eat nowadays. like its kinda nuts#and i also dont drink nearly enough water/anything#like . yesterday. i had a sandwich. at about 8pm. and aside from a handful of chips kr whatever. i didnt eat anyrhinf else that day#i havent eaten much today either .... but i actually like whats fir dinner today so i will eat eventually#its just like. even when i literally make myself food and bring it up w me to eat while i do homework/draw/write/whatever . i just forget ab#about it until it gets cold and gross and i cant eat it snymore.#i would say its my meds making me not wanna eat but isnt that side effect supposed to eventually wear off as u continue to take it?#idk#i havent been dropping weight that much anymore. i actually went up a few pounds in the past month or so and have been plateauing there for#a while. but. i do look skinnier than i have in a While even tho im a handful kf lbs more than i was at my lowest.#my guess would b that i have more muscle now . not a lot. obviously. but definitely more.#like i even have a semblance of a thigh gap. somerhing i was just barely getting to at my lowest weight.#Anyway. ive stopped dropping like. 1-3lbs a month. which is good. honestly tho i'd like to drop at least 3-5 more . which is unhealthy. But.#yeah idk im . disordered . even tho my ed hasnt really . been a huge problem for me lately. but thats probably jusr cuz i havent been eatin#eating much or thinking about eating so i have nothing to beat myself up over .#ok tangent over i will stop being insanely mentally ill on the dashboard 🫶🏻#mj.txt
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endlessnightlock · 5 months
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why have you become inactive?
Hi Anon, I hope you're doing well today.
Mostly, I haven't been around as much because real life requires more of my attention. Good stuff, though. Being more present with my family (I went to see the FNAF movie with my thirteen-year-old this week. Are any FNAF fans out here? I was slightly confused by the movie because it's not my thing but had a lot of fun going with her), eating better, cleaning my house, and trying to get organized so my chaotic monkey brain stays happy. Unfortunately, you have to stay on top of that stuff more as you age if you want to keep your sanity :).
Hopefully, once I get more of my shit together, I'll be around here more often. Love you guys and I miss hanging out!
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maniac-man1 · 5 months
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The fuck am i supposed to say when my roommate says she wants to force me into getting help. Fuck no bitch I don't look like you yet. 💀
I swear she's delusional and thinks I'm gonna die right away. Like no I'm fine lmao. It's just fasting like, it's not a big deal. 💀
Someone knock some sense into her
Anyway! Here's some nice th1nsp0 I found
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Masc and fem
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doku-no-bi · 5 months
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I know this may be seems to be a bit sensitive, but would you help azul to have healthy relationships with food? Since while he is in diet food regiment too but it seems like his reaction to food is more....harsh than yours. Riddle also seems have a strict view to food when he was home and only open up after his....you know. I want to see you three having session about food and how to have healthy reaction to food.
(To kazumi: if this ask to sensitive to you, you can ignore this. Since i heard, azul view to food may actually sign of him having ED(Eating Disorder). And for riddle it just how his mom teach him but i don't really know if it count as ED too or not)
Of course. Azul is... Usually not the type to ask for help on anything like this, but if he reached out, I most definitely would. I do encourage him to eat when I can; he is on a good diet though, so it's hard to get him to eat without being obsessive over his food. I can convince Rook to steal Azul's charts when Azul doesn't notice so he can't write his calories down. It helps at least in the moment.
I do speak to Riddle and help him with his food issues. However, I think Trey does well with helping Riddle on his own, so I don't meddle there too much unless Riddle comes to me for help.
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Idk why I did, but it stepped on the scale this morning. I could have added that one gained pound to the already burdened brain, and I did for a moment. But the newly forming rational side of my thinking took over. It reminded me that the majority of the food I had in the last 24 hours were carbs. Carbs retain water. I didn’t get any bigger and it’s only for a moment. It will pass.
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minglana · 3 months
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weight loss is so vile lmao
i get sent by my doctor to the nurse for "weight loss", the nurse gives me a diet to follow. 1400 kcal? which apparently is not a lot? idk shit abt this stuff. anyways my parents and i modify our diet. after a few months i go to the nurse again, she tells me im doing well and that ive lost weight. 2 months later (today) i get another 'weight checkup' (which makes me feel stupid and useless btw). the nurse tells me i cant obsess abt weight at my age, all while telling me all the things i shouldnt eat. including cola cao in the mornings bc its too much sugars. you can pry my cola cao from my cold dead hands. she tells me i should switch to coffee (i hate coffee. it makes me extremely jittery and i need to add a shitton of sugar to it) or regular milk (i cant stand the taste of plain milk). all of this while, again, telling me i shouldnt think abt weight too much. but i should stay away from flour, processed foods, and sugars. but again, dont obsess over weight loss too much!!!!!!
she kept insisting abt it, as if it had been my idea to do this. it was literally my doctor who made me do this!!!!! ive never given a shit abt my weight!!!!!!!!! i dont weigh myself at home i never fucking intend to. PLEASE stop pretending this was my idea!!!!!!!!!
to top this all off. the three times ive gone to the nurse, theres been a different nurse each time. yeah they can write notes on what happened last time. but every time they talk abt the same thing
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gremlinbehaviour · 8 months
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Remember that encouraging eating disorders is against tumblr community guidelines and more importantly is a really shitty thing to do. This is the only common thing that I will report people for. Especially when it ends up on the FUCKING TRENDING PAGE
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qvietspvce · 12 days
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i cannot begin to overstate how much being stuck in a body that i tried so hard to love but couldn't because it wasn't the "right" body was killing me. and i do mean that in a literal sense.
i spend well over 10 years of my life starving myself to near death at points because my body didn't feel like my body and i didn't know what else to do to "fix" it.
i have multiple suicide attempts in my medical file because i couldn't bear the thought of living in my body. my first attempt was at 16. my last attempt was at 26. i have a very dark anniversary this month from where i very nearly succeeded at 18. and again at 24.
i have lived with suicidal ideation since i was 14 (when i first became aware that the body i was growing into was going through oestrogen-based puberty). living with that voice that tells you to just kill yourself all the time is exhausting. i do not wish it on anyone.
therapy and anti-depressants only got me so far but starting testosterone saved my fucking life. being on the waitlist for the welsh gender clinic saved my life.
gender affirming care is life saving. or at least it has been in my experience. so fuck anyone and everyone who bangs on about the irreversible changes or "damage" hrt does to someone.
being dead at 16, at 18, at 20, at 22, at 24 and at 26 is irreversible too.
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syncrovoid-presents · 1 month
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Researching for my hazbin fic (A Cannibal's Guide on Living Comfortably) has also made me realize that my adoptive family (and me in relation to my birth family) actually suffer from cultural loss. And this ties to my adoptive family being half french like Alastor.
This is sort of a personal ramble about my experiences and how it relates to cultural loss. Just thoughts I've been having that's making me rethink a lot of things from my life.
(Technically I'm not but that's a whole other thing. I was found as a kid and never allowed to learn about my birth family or heritage so yeah. I'm just whatever people say I am. Means I have double the cultural loss, both from the people that raised me and my own! Yippee! <- sarcastic)
Both my parents are half french and grew up in small communities where there was very very high English vs French tensions. Both of my parents parent's decided that it would be best to give their children the easiest life they could so they raised them as English as possible.
They weren't allowed to learn french and were punished if they tried (both by family and the community. It was a lot worse where my mother grew up), and weren't allowed to continue any traditions, songs, or anything culturally French. Assimilation was the best chance at a future, but meant that they lost all ties to culture that wasn't acceptably English/colonial.
They were born a long time ago, so this was during the era of corporal punishment in school, my mother wasn't allowed to wear pants, my father was punished repeatedly for using his left hand, etc. They were also forced into churches because that's what The Good English Do, even though neither are religious now nor would they have been forced to if the hatred against the french hadn't been so strong.
The small town my mom grew up in had a segregated neighbourhood for the french, and her family fought to cut all ties. Her mother was french but was forced to only speak English and cut all ties to her family.
I don't know as much for my father, but it was his father that refused to teach or share anything French because of the hardships he went through growing up (he also ran away and lied about his age to fight in the war too young, so he likely faced heavy trauma too)
While neither of my parents are half english, they were able to pass as english at the expense of their cultural identity and connection to their family. I've spoken to my mother about it and she says white culture is genocide, but I don't know if she realizes how it hurt her too (not to say the french did nothing wrong. They were colonialists and took part in genocide as well)
It's weird to realize. I was put in french immersion and while my french isn't great, I've realized that my parents did that to give me the only opportunity I could have to learn about their lost culture. They learned a bit from me and would use french words and sometimes share translation quirks their parents had caused by learning english after french.
I grew up thinking that because I don't know anyone I'm related to that i had no culture. I've realized that part of the reason it feels that way is because anything non-English was forced out of people. The more you could pass as english the heavier the assimilation is. To join the oppressors is to sacrifice culture, history, and family, but that's a choice both my parents parent's made and it's one we all struggle with.
As far as I go, I don't know my precise ancestry, but I do know my birth grandparents fled from a country that was dealing with fighting for independence and a highly struggling economy. I'm not supposed to know that or know anything more, but from what I can guess and based on what people have said I look like (closest thing I got) my ancestors dealt with fighting against being colonized for centuries, their culture and history actively being destroyed and demonized, and the language borderline dead because of it (isnt the british imperialism great? <- sarcasm). A bit over a century ago it would have been the cause of much prejudice and hatred, but like my adoptive parents parent's they traded culture for assimilation.
It's.... weird. There's not much I can change nor not much I can do with this information movie forwards. It has helped me connect my experiences more with that of cultural loss, especially those felt by others who don't know any birth family. Because I pass as white (I do not know my genetics, so I'd rather say that than call myself white. Especially because what ancestry I do know I have weren't historically called white and faced discrimination by white folks) I previously thought these experiences could not apply to me.
As a side note, I do hold the belief that orphans like me, or others that lacked any family for much of their lives are part of a "hidden" minority. I faced a lot of extra difficulties, social pushback, and was treated worse than my peers because I am an orphan, as did different foster siblings I had over the years. Adoption means either never speaking about my life to pass as "normal" or speak about it and face the consequences. Every person's experiences are different when it comes to this, but it really changed the expectations adults had on me and forced me to be more mature, resilient, perfectionistic and less reactive to my peers. The expectation was if you acted bad you didn't appreciate having a home and therefore didn't deserve it. What others kids could get away with can be what loses your home when you grow up an orphan.
Anywho, circling back to my fic I'll be adding some elements of my experiences in there too. Not as the main focus, mind you, but some of the struggles of adapting/assimilating to the majority to avoid discrimination will be present (as well as some French (more focused on Creole French history. It was something a few of my french teachers focused a lot on) ). Just background info, I'm as of yet undecided on how much of a character study it will all be, but if it does go into it more then these themes will be present
#syncrovoid.txt#personal#ramble#delete later#to delete later#cultural loss#colonialization#british imperialism#at least mention of it anyways#tw cultural loss#tw foster care#foster care#actually orphan#idk if that is a tag but perhaps others can relate#ignore thos lol ill probably delete later and be sad i shared such personal information#also been thinking about this because my family recipes is just depression era food#literally got adopted and then had to eat like it was the great depression#and spent more years living in unfinished homes than anything else#electricity? a privilege. running water? as long as one faucet works that's good enough. heat? wood fires. food? stole some sometimes lol#upside is that i have a lot of skills and whatnot. downside is that SOMEHOW i grew up like it was nearly a century ago???#literally didn't get a phone until like 2 years ago#grew up spending most of my time in the woods too. modern world? nope! forest!#ALSO THR LOSS ONE FEELS WHEN THEY SEE PEOPLE TEAR DOWN THEIR FOREST IS REAL AND INTENSE AND THE WORST LOSS I HAVE#also while my adoptive mother doesn't practice vodou she is considered a spiritual healer that shares ties with vodou#it is a closed thing tho. either their own spiritual practice or a cult so. but it doesn't hurt anyone and aims to heal but can be demonized#obviously not the same HOWEVER the feelings of bring in that environment and then suddenly not and realizing that basically no one#knows anything about it? has insulted it at best or will think you're crazy for talking about it? having a different point of view on life#because of it?#like. obviously it isn't the same thing and i can claim not level of connection to vodou nor the history of those who practice#but is sorta get it. kinda. in my own way. it absolutely sucks
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lilgynt · 11 months
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the irony of hannibal being my special interest and having an eating disorder does not escape me
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