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miraclecherryblossomsblog · 9 months

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Imagen, reader whose from our world but gets transported to the marvel comic world and involuntary becomes a spider dude even tho they don't have spider abilities. Only depending in their own physical strenght and web shooters....

(gwenpool in other words cuz i really love the concetp)

Tw: loneliness, implied depression, grief and isolation (probsbly grammar mistakes too..)

-Spider Reader being able to break through comic panels a travel to whatever world they want, and because they don't exist into any universe they don't glitch like others spider dudes

-Spider Reader just being able to watch the action and stuff from their white void that just like a white room that doesn't seem to have an ending

-Spider Reader trying to help people as many as they csn but still manage to fail because they're just so much someone can do before all their strenght in cut short, specialy when one isn't physicaly or mentaly trained for it.

- Spider Reader intervening with a lot of canon events and becoming a fugitive of the HQ after they met Miguel (note: reader was already aware what canon events where, no they didn't care in those moments, all they thought was to save, save as many as they can)

-Spider Reader just coming back to their blank space so broken and hurt in both ways but still decided to try and do what they can, even if that means breaking some bones or losing some blood

-Spider Reader just going through so much on their own, not having anyone to aid for or to talk to which causes their mental state to detoriate but yet....they still go out and try to do their thing

-Spider Reader who doesn't allow to make friends or get close to anyone after seeing people they cared about dying in their arms too many times, entering and leaving the world just as fast before anyone csn get a word out to them

- Spider Reader that meets miles gang in one of their many travels throught worlds and after reader saved Miles from alnost getting body slamed, the group imediately noticing the bad shape they are in and decide to help them out

-Spider Reader who gets along with miles after he finds out that they are too an anomaly and both of them know what it is like to be excluded just because of something that was out of your control

-Spider Reader that slowly starts getting more and more comftable with the gang and realise its been A WHILE since they were able to laugh with someone or getting physical affection from friends

-Spider Reader who starts to smile again after finally habing people that supports and loves them how they are

#reader insert #spider man across the spider verse x reader #across the spider verse x reader #fic?#spider reader #hobie brown x reader #miles morales x reader #pavitr prabhakar x reader #gwen stacy x reader #spider noir x reader #spider punk x reader #spider ghost x reader #spider man x reader #indian spiderman x reader #tw loneliness #tw isolation #tw depression #tw grief

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serickswrites · 7 months

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Except the Moon

Warnings: captivity, torture, touch starved, loneliness, self sacrifice

Whumpee hadn't bothered to get out of the makeshift bed they had made in the room Whumper locked them in for the last several days. And they knew it had been days based on the progression of light and changes in the night. But they couldn't be bothered any longer. They had been here for so long. So terribly, terribly long. And they just couldn't care anymore.

When they had volunteered in Caretaker's stead, begged Whumper to take them instead, that had thought that Whumper would hurt them until they died and that would be it. They didn't think they would be locked in a room, alone, for weeks with no one to talk to, touch, or even see. All they had was the small window near the top of their cell where they could see the sky, the sun, and more often than not, the moon.

They had screamed and hollered the first several days they were there. Beat on the door. Tried to scale to the small window. But it had all been to no avail.

They had thought that Whumper would come for them then. Begin their torture then. But Whumper hadn't. Other than the slat opening in the wall and food appearing at regular intervals, Whumpee had not seen nor heard from Whumper since Whumper threw them in the room.

And they were so terribly lonely. They had nothing. No one. Except the moon. "I wish Caretaker was here. Not here instead. But here with me," they whispered to the moon. In the last few days, they found themself talking to the moon, hoping she would listen, but not daring to hope she would grant their wish.

Whumpee knew all they had to do was beg Whumper to make it stop, to trade places with Caretaker, and they would be free. But they couldn't do that. Though they longed to be seen, to be heard, and most of all to be touched, they couldn't do that. They couldn't let Caretaker be tortured like this. Or like anyway.

And so they would stay. Alone in this room with no company, except the moon.

#serickswrites #whump #whumpblr #whump writing #whump community #tw captivity #tw torture #tw touch starved #tw loneliness #tw self sacrifice #whumptober #whumptober 2023 #whumptober day 3 #“like crying out in empty rooms with no one there except the moon”#prompt: solitary confinement #queue

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psychedelic-ink · 11 months

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I'll probably delete this later but for some reason, I have the urge to make this update even though I feel weird about having that need to make it. I usually try not to post a lot of negativity here so sorry about that

here are my not-so-fun life updates. tw death, grief, loneliness

It's been a rough month due to a lot of things. The most significant reasons being loneliness and grief. The first one I always struggle with and I doubt it's going anywhere soon. The latter, well, I lost my grandmother 20 days ago and we buried my grandfather today as well. It's...hard. Even though we weren't blood-related (they're my stepmom's parents) They're the first relatives that I care about, and love, that died. I have so many memories with them and it happened so suddenly. They led a full life, my grandmother dying at 90 and grandfather at 95 but still, it feels sudden.

Again, not really sure why I'm making this post. I just feel bad. So incredibly lonely and nothing seems to make that weight I feel go away anymore. The therapist isn't working, my self boost talk isn't working. It just feels so empty and it's not just because of losing my grandparents, I've been feeling like this for a while. It's just getting worse and worse and I feel as if the loneliness is eating me alive, as dramatic as that sounds

Anyway, that's pretty much all I wanted to say. Still not sure why my brain is nudging me to post this. I'm not taking a hiatus or anything and I'll be posting like normal because as odd as it might be, tumblr and the fandom gives me so much joy

so yeah,,,,sending all of you hugs!

#the sil diaries #personal #tw grief #tw loneliness #delete later

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ourstaturestouchtheskies · 1 year

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El Perro (The Dog) - Francisco Goya // A House in Nebraska - Ethel Cain

#el perro #dog #francisco de goya #goya #a house in nebraska #preacher's daughter #ethel cain #art #art history #lyrics #lyric art #tw loneliness

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invalid-request · 1 year

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cuz I know somewhere down the line I'm just gonna have that "Wtf? I thought we were friends?" moment

so why even try with anyone

#fear of abandonment #betrayal #friendship #tw loneliness #lonlyness #lonley #lonelyness #friend breakup #making friends #trust issues #trust no one

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wolfprincesszola · 8 months

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Porch Tears (Sanders Sides)

I'm not good at titles I know I'm sorry. i try to be lighthearted, but I thought it'd be nice to hear how much this story means to me as an author because i've always struggled voicing how my depression feels and I managed to accurately portray a part of it in here. everyone's version of depression looks different. i hope that anyone reading this that resonates with what logan and patton feel know that you are special and that these feelings do not define how to live your life <3

Masterlist ——————– Summary: After Logan has too much to drink, he goes outside to cry. Patton notices him outside on the porch and decides to ask him why he was crying and comfort him in his time of need.

Trigger Warnings: Talks of Depression, Anxiety, Loneliness

Content Warnings: Swearing, Drinking ——————–

Logan was sad. He was always sad. It would've been abnormal if he wasn't sad. What was abnormal though was being so sad that he was crying. He never cried. It was always numb. He didn't even know what had gotten him to feel the way he was feeling. Maybe it was the fact that he was drunk. Maybe it was the fact that he was at a party with all of his friends, and yet he felt really lonely. Maybe it was because despite everything he had tried, he saw how happy Patton was with all their friends and felt like he could've never been good enough for him. He was always so happy and he looks so beautiful that way. He looked like he never even needed Logan and that made Logan feel even more lonely.

Logan stopped crying after a few minutes. There was no point in crying over a silly admiration of his friend. Patton was just his friend, nothing else. Of course Patton wouldn't think more of him. Of course Patton wouldn't feel happy around him the way Patton did with the other people. Patton was Patton and Logan was just Logan.

Logan forced himself to wipe his tears and stop sniffling. He forced himself to ignore how much his heart hurt. He forced himself to ignore the pain and instead tried to smile.

Then, there it was. The familiar, cruel, cold numbness. At least it was something he could deal with because he knew how to. He had been doing it all his life.

Logan sighed, leaning against the doorway. The good thing about being forgotten was that he could sit outside for as long as he wanted to and no one would notice. He breathed in the outside air and convinced himself to be happy. He could fake a smile, even if it was for a couple more hours. He could do this.

Then, he heard the door open behind his back and Logan shifted so the person could get out onto the porch.

"Sorry." Logan's voice croaked. Dammit, why did it have to show now? Don't let anyone know that he was crying. He couldn't let them know. Everyone would come out asking him what was wrong, why he was crying. Logan didn't know how he could explain how lonely he always felt, even in a crowd packed with people. He didn't know how to explain how heavy his heart always was, even when he was smiling so hard that his cheeks hurt. He didn't know how to explain how even when he was around his friends happy, there was always a part of him that was sad and always would be. There were no words to describe the reasons behind his crying and behind his sadness because there was no way to describe the solitude prison he forced himself into.

"Logan? Is that you?" Patton's voice was laced with worry as he fully stepped out to see the man. His face melted into relief as he knelt down beside him. "I've been looking for you everywhere."

Logan couldn't explain how happy that made him feel, but how sad his heart was to know that all of Patton's concern was just a social cue. That maybe, his worry was only because Logan was a part of the mind, a part of his friends. Maybe, Patton was only worried, but not concerned because Logan wasn't special to him the way others were. He saw the way Patton loved others and Logan felt that maybe he wasn't worthy of getting that. Patton didn't treat him the same way he treated the others and when he did, Logan always managed to ruin it by pushing him away. God, everything was his fault all of the time all at once.

"Sorry, I stepped outside for some fresh air. Did you need me?" Logan forced a chuckle out.

"Not really. I was just worried." Patton spoke up, "I lost track of where you were and wanted to make sure you were okay. You said you wanted fresh air. Did you want me to leave?"

He didn't want Patton to leave him alone because with Patton around, he always managed to make the numbness a little more bearable. With Patton around, he could forget that he felt the way he felt. But Logan wanted to be alone in his thoughts. He wanted to sit in the numbness because he was sure he deserved it. There had to be a reason he felt that way, that he was punished with feeling this way for eternity.

"I don't know." Logan admitted.

"Alright then." Patton stood up, "I'll be back in a few minutes to check on you then, okay?"

Logan nodded and watched as he left. Then, the tears fell again. Logan didn't know why he was crying. Was it because Patton left him there? How pathetic of Logan.

Wiping tear after tear falling, he stood up, coughing and trying to stop sniffling. Walking down the porch, he stumbled towards the tree before coughing and trying to stop his sniffles.

"Shit!" Logan swore, wiping away his tears. This sight of display was almost pitiful, if it wasn't horrible to explain. "Fuck!"

Why was his life this way? Why did he always have to feel this way?

Logan stumbled back towards the porch once he had stopped his crying, sitting back on the porch.

There was a knock on the inside of the door before Patton stepped back out, holding two small ice packs individually wrapped in towels. He motioned to the spot next to Logan, asking if he could sit there. When Logan nodded numbly, he was quick to sit down, holding the ice packs for the man.

Logan raised an eyebrow as he took both of them. "What are these for?"

"Your eyes." Patton stated, "I heard they're good to keep the swelling down."

Logan was more confused now. "What?"

"For your crying."

Oh. He knew? Fuck, Logan was humiliated and mortified. How could he have let Patton see him like that? Would Patton call the rest of the mind to come and comfort him? He couldn't deal with that.

"I didn't know you knew." Logan mumbled.

Patton stared outside towards the garden that Roman and Virgil had started to plant in. "I'm not good at that sort of thing."

"What sort of thing?"

"Noticing, especially with people crying. I can't tell if someone's eyes are red or if they had just stopped sniffling. I can't tell if people are sad by their expressions. I can't catch the vibes of people and often I make a mess of situations because I don't understand what other people are feeling. I make people feel awful without knowing and I'm just overall bad at picking up cues for anything." Patton started before turning to Logan to cup the right side of his face and wipe his damp cheek away of any leftover tears, "But I'm not blind and I'm not deaf. I saw you huddled outside crying through the window. I heard you gasping so hard for breaths because you were crying so hard. And I want to tell you that I wish you didn't have to feel like you couldn't cry in front of me. Anyone in the mind even."

Great. Now he was crying again.

"What happened?" Patton asked, concern laced in his voice, "Why are you crying?"

"Just crying. Some people aren't built happy, you know?" Logan sniffled.

Patton gave a small laugh at that, "Yeah, I get that. And you know what? It's okay to feel like that. Come here."

He held his arms out and Logan took it, shifting to wrap his arms around Patton's waist, squeezing as tight as he possibly could. Patton held him in his arms tightly too, not letting go of the hug. God, Logan needed that. He didn't even know why.

"I feel lonely." Logan murmured, his face buried in the crook of Patton's neck. He choked back a sob as more tears streamed down his face. He was sure Patton's skin and clothes were stained with his tears, but Patton didn't comment about it, instead letting him cry it out.

"Oh, Logan. Everyone feels lonely. Hell, even I do. It's a normal thing. It's okay to feel lonely. I hope you know that in those times though, you'll always have me and the rest of the mind." Patton reassured him, petting the back of his hair. It was soothing.

Logan separated from the hug to look at Patton with his tear-streaked face, "You do? I didn't think anything fazed you. You're just so happy all the time."

"To be honest, I'm just as guilty of you of not really telling people when I'm sad, but it gets kinda easy not to talk to people about it when you're always sad. It's just easier to be happy because no one asks you why you're happy. They only ask you why you're sad." Patton admitted, "And maybe, as hard as it is to say it, it's easy to pretend that no one cares about you than try to explain this feeling within you about how you're always going to feel as if no one cares even if you know you're someone's entire world."

Logan didn't know if he was glad that Patton understood what he was feeling, or if he was upset that he understood. As he looked at Patton still smiling through what he presumed was a similar numbness to the one he experienced every day, he wihed that Patton didn't have to suffer with him.

"I wish you didn't understand. Then you wouldn't have to pretend to be happy. I wish I could take away all the pain from you, so only I would have to feel it." Logan spoke.

"That's very kind of you, Logan." Patton let out a laugh, "But it's okay. I think it'd be harder for me to be able to talk to you if I didn't understand."

"How do you deal with it?" Logan's voice was hoarse again. He had stopped sobbing by this point. He had stopped sniffling and hiccuping. He had stopped choking on his tears. Instead, now silent tears were the only thing streaming down his face. "It hurts so much."

"It does." Patton admitted, "But people like you make it better. You see, the problem with my mind is that it's whirling all the time at a thousand miles per hour, yelling at me with all sorts of thoughts. But then I'm around you and the thoughts quiet and suddenly, the numbness doesn't feel so noticable. My heart feels less heavy when I'm around you."

"You mean around the mind. Not me."

"No, I mean you." Patton admitted, "I care about you a lot more than you realize. The other members of the mind help calm my mind in different ways, but you're just as special as the rest of them. I hope you remember that."

Logan's heart warmed at what he said and suddenly, it was like the fog of darkness had cleared. His heart didn't feel so heavy and his numbness had cleared. His sadness had lifted and Logan felt okay for the first time in a long time.

Patton sighed, tsking as he saw the untouched warm ice packs, "Looks like I'm going to have to get more of those. I'll be back in a little bit."

"No, you don't have to." Logan stumbled on his words. "It's okay."

"I want to." Patton wiped the remaining tears from Logan's face before standing up. "Give me one minute."

He was back with new ice packs wrapped in new undamp towels before he sat down next to Logan and held them against his eyes.

Logan sighed in defeat as he let the coldness of the ice packs infect the warmness of his eyes and cheeks after having cried for a long time.

"You can go back in if you want to. I know it's not really fun sitting outside with a sad drunk."

"It's always fun when I'm with you, Logan. Don't you worry at all." Patton hummed.

Logan hoped that the ice pack was covering his flush and the tears that were starting to fall from his eyes. God, it was starting to get old. there was no reason for him to cry over him realizing that maybe all of his thoughts were just thoughts and that the truth was really in front of him all along.

"Are you crying again?" Patton giggled at Logan.

"Shut up!" Logan let out a laugh, playfully nudging his shoulder that was touching his. "I'm in a completely vulnerable spot right now!"

"Seriously though, Logan. I really hope that you never feel the need to hide the fact that you're crying from me ever again."

"...thanks, Patton."

That was all he could say. Those were all the words he could even think that would fathom to express how much Patton meant to him.

#this can be taken as platonic or romantic logicality #logicality #logan sanders #ts logan #ts patton #patton sanders #logan x patton #platonic #romantic #tw depression #cw swearing #tw anxiety #tw loneliness #sanders sides #logan crying #accurate portrayal of depression #cw drinking

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loveyourlovelysoul · 11 months

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Gentle reminder

-you're not being a burden for needing help or to talk about anything that is troubling you -you're not unwanted: sometimes we unwillingly make the void around ourselves because we close off to others in fear of them seeing us as burdens or too much. Anytime we say we're fine when we're not and don't let the others in by sharing our true self and our needs and fears and worries, we send the signal that we don't want them to know that part of us and we can deal with negative stuff alone and them to "interfere" even if it's not our intention; -so do not isolate yourself, let others in, even if it's so hard especially in the beginning and your mind is telling you everyone will leave the moment you'll show your anxiety or talk your fears. This is not true. Give yourself (and others too) time to know yourself, your needs, your negative sides, and don't be afraid to share them with those you trust: we all have them, we all have needs, fears and problems too, we're all humans; -do not fear being abandoned or rejected: be yourself, even if it's hard. If others leave, it's only beacuse they're not supposed to be in your life. We're not made for everyone to stay with us, and not all of our life either and we cannot control who stays and who goes away. It doesn't depend on us alone, it's the other/s' choice as well; -you deserve all you dream of and the best of it all too, simply because you're here with us. You're worthy of affection and very lovable, and you don't have to do anything to "gain" love and affection or anything else; -there's nothing wrong with you, this is only a very common mental pattern many people generally grew up to believe is right.

Loneliness can make you doubt so much about you and your choices, but please do not isolate more. Make a choice in the opposite direction: try and meet new people, do not wait for others to approach you, approach them first. You won't make a bad impression. And if it won't work immediately it's okay, you're trying and you may be rusty or never done that. Give yourself time. You'll meet the right people too.

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companionjones · 2 years

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Pity Laugh

Pairing: Lenny Bruce x Reader (could be taken as platonic or romantic)

Fandom: The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel

Summary: You see one of Lenny Bruce’s shows nearly every night. There’s no way he’s noticed you, right?

Warnings: Cursing, lonliness

*******

Some people say that parasocial relationships are unhealthy. Fuck who ever says that; because honestly, you were getting along just fine with just doing your day job and going to Lenny Bruce shows nearly every night.

Had you ever talked to the man? No. But you were pretty sure you knew more about Lenny than anybody in the city. We didn’t talk about himself much on stage, every once in a while he would let slip a truth about his personal life, and you never forgot a word of it. When it came to Lenny Bruce, you knew everything about him.

At every show, you got as close to the front row as you could. It became inexplicably easier for you to find a fantastic seat as time went on. You would, more often than not, be in the best seat in the house.

That night, you were happened to be front and center to watch Lenny preform some material he’d been working on over the past month or so. You knew that set pretty well, but you weren’t bored of it. Actually, you would have preferred it if he stuck to that material instead of what he drifted into.

“Tonight, I’m with a very good friend of mine--a fellow comedian as well. Her name is Mrs. Maisel. Perhaps you’ve heard of her?”

You had. You’d seen her act once or twice, when Lenny had had a night off. She even performed with Bruce every once in a while. She was funny. Very funny. However...you hated to admit it, you hated how shallow it made you, but you were jealous of Maisel. Jealous of how close she was to Lenny. You really would have preferred to not hear Lenny talk about Mrs. Maisel that night.

But he did. Nonstop. His whole set was about her and their friendship.

“Oh, and it’s well known now that this woman’s got balls on her to rival the ones you see on New Year’s Eve! The thing she has said are vulgar enough to get all of the police up in arms to bring her in.”

Lenny’s words only got more offensive to the average listener, but you weren’t paying attention. You wouldn’t have cared anyway. You were fine with the most vulgar things in the world as long as they came out of Lenny’s mouth, but you really couldn’t listen to one more word that night about all the friends that Lenny had. All the friends that weren’t you.

You couldn’t take it any longer. Trying your best not to disrupt the set, you hot up from your seat and exited the venue from the back.

Everything was going smoothly until somebody rushed out after you. “Wait, wait! What did I say?”

Shock nearly paralyzed you as you turned around. “W-what?”

Lenny Bruce stood there in the alley with you. He looked extremely worried. “Did I say something wrong? What did I say to get you to walk out? Just tell me, and I’ll never say it again.”

It took you a few moments to speak. “Why would it matter what I think?”

Lenny finally explained, “I noticed you comin’ to all my shows a long time ago. That’s why a seat’s always open for you, right? Now, I have fans, but seeing you night after night brought a comfort to me, y’know? Plus, I know my jokes are good when you’re laughin’.”

“I laugh at all your jokes,” you replied, confused.

Lenny smirked, “You do. But you only really laugh at the good stuff. The rest are just pity laughs.”

That got you to really laugh. “I do not pity laugh.”

“You do when I’m as funny as a hyena in a bad suit...See? Pity laugh.”

You slapped a hand over your mouth. “I should’ve guessed you’d be this annoying. Never meet your heroes, right?”

“Right,” he chuckled. “You never said, why’d you leave?”

Looking away, you bit your lip. “Um...I just...got a bit sad.”

“Sad?”

You tried to explain. “You just...You have such good friends, Lenny.”

Still he was confused. “Why’d you get upset about my friends?”

“I’m lonely, Lenny. I’m so lonely. I try to forget it by watching you so often, but sometimes it’s hard to forget, you know? And tonight, seeing you up there, talking about how you and Maisel are so close and--”

“Wait, you don't think we’re...Because I can promise you, we’re not--”

“I know,” you nodded. “That much is clear in the way you talk about her. I can tell.”

Lenny smiled. “Of course you can tell. But hey.” He took a step closer to you. “You don’t have to be lonely anymore, alright?”

“Now you’re the one pitying,” you pointed out, doing your best to cover your sadness with a smile.

Lenny didn’t buy it for a moment. “I’m telling you the truth. You have me now, and I’ll get you another friend...Come on.”

Abruptly, Lenny took your hand and lead you back inside the venue. He walked you up to Mrs. Maisel. Proudly, Lenny introduced you. “Miriam Maisel, I’d like you to meet...I haven’t learned your name yet, have I?”

Feeling your cheeks heat up a little at how familiar you and Lenny already were with each other, you gave your name.

Mrs. Maisel shook your hand. “It’s very nice to meet you. My friends just call me ‘Midge.’”

Lenny celebrated, “See? There you go. A whole ‘nother friend right there.”

Midge got distracted by one of her fans getting her attention.

Lenny put an arm around you, pulled you close, and said only to you. “Stick with me, and I’ll make sure you’re never lonely again. Got that?”

“I already was sticking with you, so I don’t think I’ll stop,” you joked.

Lenny kissed the side of your head and launched into a conversation with Midge after laughing at your joke. It definitely wasn’t a pity laugh.

*******

Author’s Note: Thank you for reading! Fill up that heart and reblog if you liked it. I would also really appreciate a comment, if you have the time. If you would like to read more, I have more Lenny Bruce stories on my masterlist. You should check it out. Have a nice day, night, or whatever time it is for you! <3 <3 <3

#the marvelous mrs maisel #lenny bruce #lenny bruce x reader #luke kirby #companion jones #pity laugh #tw loneliness

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