#tv cat answers

[simplydnp]

Sometimes I think Dan and Phil are totally platonic besties and then other times I’m convinced they fuck on the daily. I think they do it on purpose and it’s honestly iconic.

kind of the best thing is that they are that and everything in between. you can tell they just like being around each other. they've made content together for 15 years and the large majority of it was done in the strictly platonic sense for their audience. and they were still having so much fun with it. we're in the 'we know you know' era now so we get to see flashes of different dynamics they have, but they absolutely have more we Don't get to see bc they're not for us.

they like each other. stupidly fond of each other. spending time together doesn't feel exhausting. they're best friends and each others' harshest critics while being the biggest hypeman and also safe space.

dnp's relationship with us, their audience, always has been and always will be different than any other content creators. part of it is how they accumulated it, but another part is just the massive history we have with them. they Get us. they Know us. they're silly goofy sarcastic guys who love us and hate us sometimes. theyre grateful but careful too. they like to rile us up, just like they do each other. it's a love language, teasing, and we've shown positive responses to it over the years. i like to say that my relationship with dnp is antagonistic sometimes--cause i know they're pushing my buttons on purpose. and ykw? it's fun! it's fun for us and it's fun for them because they have the control. i know anything they let out is cause they chose to let it out because they Know how we are. so yes they absolutely adore messing with us. we're a funny bunch.

#im getting sappy again #the things you mention anon are not mutually exclusive for dnp. which is a lot of the fun of it #like for me personally. why be in a relationship with someone who isnt your best friend. i dont know how they couldnt be your favourite ever #like maybe im projecting but theirs is probably the healthiest depiction of love i have in my life #theres movies and tv but its not real. and yes dnp are produced. and aware. and curate. but theyre not selling a relationship. #sure we perceive it. but its not the goal. the product is the entertainment value of them together cause theyre funny. #whereas almost every relationship ive properly witnessed in my life seems like. a trap. genuinely. #its like well no love isnt actually real its a concept you just. are stuck. for the rest of existence. be happy about it. #and with dnp its like oh like love is actually real. like theres a reason people want to stay together forever. #like people Do get lost in each others eyes. they get a different look on their face that reads i love you #theres people out there who will love every aspect of you and never get enough of you or your time #i am. so far off on a tangent. #anyways love dnp love the cat and mouse game we play together #dnp #c.text #dan and phil #answered

[monpalace]

Wild is child who you need to keep stimulated so you can get things done. When I was younger I loved watching food network especially iron chef, unwrapped and good eats along with the holiday specials and it was to the point where my parents would have vhs tapes and dvds filled with the stuff to turn on for me when they needed to do important work and I see the chain or his s/o doing the same on his slate for him.

the only reason wild is able to cook so well is because whoever took care of him in the castle made him watch cooking shows whenever he wasn't training-- what's more, they would put on competitive cooking shows and that's why he's so critical of others cooking when he eats, it's canon, zelda told me herself

when it comes to keeping him busy nowadays, the chain or his s/o probably do it to keep him from finding out about a surprise or something. maybe they have to beckon him away somewhere private, sit down with him for a few minutes to watch an episode with him, and then leave to do whatever they have to do-- or maybe they're trying to finalize some paperwork but he keeps bothering and pulling them away, so they treat them like a cat by pulling up a chair and putting on a video while they work

#the palace answers #no bc imagine after lessons or social hour they lock him in a room with the tv on so he wouldnt wander out and get lost #they come in hours later to get him for dinner and hes still sitting there with the most entranced look #cats having their own computers while their owners work is so cute to me #linked universe x reader #lu x reader #loz x reader #legend of zelda x reader

[blasphemyisjustforyou]

I'm waiting for vets to open so I can take this cat I found in to check for microchips. Literally why do they open at like 8 am. Who does this benefit???

#The ARL in town doesn't open til noon either #and they're gonna be the more likely option #like yeah I'm sure a vet can give me an answer but what do I do from there? #Go to the person's house and talk to them? #like 'Hi yeah I found your collarless cat in my yard at like 2 am so I took him inside anyways if this happens again I wont return him' #it doesn't help that he keeps trying to climb on my desk and knocked my TV over once already doing so

[hold-him-down]

🍕What's their guilty pleasure food? for Leo

Leo has a secret sweet tooth but imposes a lot of really restrictive eating habits on himself. Anything that he eats or is given that he doesn't consider necessary to his survival he looks at as a guilty pleasure, and especially early on, goes through some internal crises about it. He doesn't feel like he deserves most of what he would consider a 'treat' and so he tries to create contingencies for himself. His eating habits are fucked up across the board, but especially in his relationship with eating things that aren't directly linked to keeping him alive.

the short answer: ice cream, cheesecake/pie, some cookies

#fucked up eating habits #oc asks #leo #the fighter #sorry im trying to do answers but the cats are being cute #and the tv turned itself on it’s a whole thing

[unknownarmageddon]

Geddon breaking news :

I have a new sitting box . It is perfect vertical Deni size . i am comfy .

I also has water because water

Yay

box

I literally dragged this box up the stairs like an excited raccoon or sumthin like ' heheheheheh boxboxboxbox '

Honestly that’s so real boxes are great

#My grandparents had this like MASSIVE box when I was a lot littler #and I would just. Pile blankets and plushies into and just sit in and watch tv #cat instincts #man it was great though #anyway #answering asks #denieatsart asks #Deni!!

[noperopesaredope]

So my younger sib is starting to get into fandom, and they have begun to worry that they will be considered “cringe” if they ever want to express themselves in an unabashedly chaotic way like the 15 y/o they are. And that makes me really sad, since they have such an enthusiastic and creative attitude. 

They want to write weird fanfics without shame, like their concept for a The Boys x Bubble Guppies crossover fic in which The Deep gets therapy from a group of mer-children singing about math. And I think they should write it, because they are creative and excited and just want to have fun. They are just being introduced to a form of community in which they can share this kind of stuff with people whom they share interests with.

They should get to make the things that make them happy, regardless of what people think of it. In fact, they should be supported in theses things, no matter how “weird” their creations are. Because I remember creating “cringy” fan OCs and stuff, and I remember excitedly showing them to people, only for them to laugh at it or dismiss it. 

And even if those people don’t remember it, I do. I vividly remember the hurt I felt when that happened. These were creations I was legitimately proud of, and it was like people were just throwing them in the trash. I eventually stopped making things like that, and I have a hard time doing so now. I don’t want to see my sib lose that spark, that brand of confidence.

I think everyone should start to encourage unironically embracing all their most dumb, self-indulgent, and “cringy” ideas and creations with the utmost love and ernestness. Because face it, we pretty much all have those kinds of silly little ideas in our heads.

So starting from today, I’m gonna do it. I’m no longer gonna hide away all my silliest, most self-indulgent, most “cringy” ideas and stories and characters.

I’m gonna tell my sis about my original fan-made Warrior Cats clan I made in 4th grade called “NinjaClan” with my OCs “Subarusteam” and “Toyotaclaw” (those where the only Japanese words I knew).

I’m gonna draw my childhood Wild Kratts self-insert OC who was an extremely powerful, 4th wall-breaking, lowkey Mary Sue who I shipped with Martin.

I’m gonna make edgy characters and show them off in all their glory.

I’m gonna talk about my stupid current fan OCs who would get a high score on the Universal Mary Sue Litmus Test due to messing with the plot and being ~mysterious~

I’m hoping this post can maybe be one where people just spill out those ideas they’ve been hiding away for years because it was “too cringy”. So come on, I want to hear about those OCs you made when you were 12 that you were way too proud of. I want all the Mary Sues. 

I want everything you threw out for being “cringe.” Because we all have a “cringy” middle schooler within us, and they should be set free.

#answer in tags #fandom #fan culture #fandom culture #cringe culture is dead #new fans #acceptance #embrace the cringe #the boys tv #the boys amazon #bubble guppies #mary sue #fan ocs #self insert #self indulgent #self indulgence at its finest #warrior cats #warrior cat oc #cringe culture is stupid #wild kratts #wild kratts oc #self insert oc #edgy oc #have fun #get creative

[twst-beam]

WOE POORLY RENDERED WHISPER BE UPON YOU (literally just remembered this show I really liked it a few years ago)

OMG IT'S YOKAI I REMEMBER THIS SHOW TOO :DDDDDDD

#calira answers #we used to watch this on tv :DDDD #i liked the cat ^v^ #looking back it reminds me of grim now :DD #also i clearly remember that one episode with the truth-telling duck yokai and how it defeated the other yokai because it had no secrets to #cringe about. VERY formative to 9 year old me #that duck yokai really said i'm cringe but free XD

[obsessivetherian]

hate hate hate when get asked "how feel" shrug not answer noise not answer drawing not answer want words not have words never have words only have noise or drawing or something else they not consider "words"

why ask how feel if not like answer

#yes i do feel like *phrase from tv show* #yes i do feel like cat rolling on floor #no cannot explain #wish it were answer #not have “regular” understanding of feeling #urgh #actually autistic #autism #the king sits there | therian talks

[wooshofficial]

every time I see ur blog title my mental image of you gets a leetol bit tinier.

Thanks lettuce I’m glad I’m just a little creechur to you that was the point

#woosh answers #lettuce tv #every year I just kinda assess the vibes and see where I wanna start the new year off #last year I was dead and this year I’m a pathetic wet cat

[demiurgenesis]

Having thoughts about the walrus fairy poll (a dangerous pass time, I know) and I'm trying to find a way to explain like... how a small inconsequential thing can be the harbinger of something more significant, and that that's where true comedy/terror/wonder lies.

A big part of my sense of humour is 'implication'. When playing Cards Against Humanity it's basically a guaranteed laugh to play a card that just says 'a hat full of shit' but I find it funnier to play something that you have to think about for a fraction of a second before 'oh god no!' as you realise what's being implied. (Nothing against the cards that say things like 'a monkey with a huge dick' - for one of my friends those are her absolute FAVOURITE cards. That's exactly her style of humour. Love that about her.)

But the idea that a fairy at your doorstep is 'easier' than a walrus at your doorstep doesn't track with me.

A walrus on your doorstep brings up so many questions, of course. How did it get here? How did it knock? Why didn't anyone notice, or did they notice? What's going on???

But even being able to engage with this bizarre situation is what makes it attainable. Yes it COULD have walked (dragged?) itself all the way here from the sea. Yes it could have escaped from a zoo or unethical neighbour. Yes it could have knocked on the door by messing around with it until it sounded like a knock that got your attention - or someone else knocked for it and then ran away and hid in a bush. Ridiculous - sure - but something I can engage with.

A fairy at the door? Oh easy, it's just a fairy, and they can knock.

...except it's not actually that simple.

I have to argue with my mum about bigfoot sometimes (long story) and she tries to Occam's Razor me with this:

"You walk outside and there's footsteps from a bigfoot in the snow. Now what's more likely? That a person went out of their way to make fake-bigfoot shoes so they could leave footprints in the snow, and was so careful about it that they didn't leave any trace of their deception, and correctly matched the stride and weight of a much larger creature, and blah blah all these other complicated things they'd need to do, and no one saw them do it...... or that it was just a bigfoot going for a walk in the snow? Occam's Razor says the simplest explanation is usually the correct one. So which of these two is simpler? I creature going for a walk or a human messing around with an extremely complicated and well executed prank?"

The answer is that a human doing it is simpler. Even though it sounds more complicated. Even though it takes longer to explain. Even though it requires an element of luck to pull off. It is still the simpler explaination. Why? BECAUSE THE BIG PICTURE IMPLICATIONS.

If a bigfoot 'just went for a walk' it certainly sounds like a simpler explanation. Except that bigfoots don't exist. So if they did then we need to explain why one's never been seen, or heard, or caught. Why there's nothing that's disrupting the ecosystem like a bigfoot creature would. No plants or animals are getting eaten by this undetected creature. Why there's no hair, or poop, or DNA. Why there's no bones or fossils or corpses. Why there's no 'marks on trees' or whatever else things an animal/creature leaves behind when it lives somewhere. And why following the footprints into the wood never leads to finding a goddamn bigfoot at the end of the trail.

That's how I feel about 'a fairy on my doorstep is simpler than a walrus' because it's not, it's actually extremely more complicated than finding a walrus. Yes, even though the walrus has to do all this complicated stuff to be able to show up and knock on my door. It's not NEARLY as world-shattering as what finding a fairy on the doorstep would imply about reality as I understand it.

You're goddamn right I'd be surprised to find a fairy - especially in knowing that that's what it is.

That's right: I'm asking how do I know it's a fairy? Do I just know? Do I just instinctively know what it is upon seeing it? How could I? Even with stories and media painting a picture for me of what a fairy might look like, why in the world would I know AND BELIEVE that the thing on my doorstep is a fairy? And yet apparently I do. I open the door and there is a fairy and I know this and believe this. I know and believe this as surely as if there were a walrus on my doorstep - a walrus being a thing I have never seen in real life, only in records and art, and yet if I met one I'd know it and believe it - you're telling me the same is true of meeting a fairy on my doorstep? THE IMPLICATIONS! Is the fairy affecting my brain in a 'BE NOT AFRAID' kind of way? Is the existance and recognition of fairies actually already embedded in my brain? Maybe I have seen them before. Maybe I've seen them and they made me forgot, but now I see one again I instantly know what it is. If there's one fairy are there more fairies? Where are they in the ecosystem? Why is there no evidence of that? Do they exist outside the ecosystem? Is fairyland real? A reality seporate from our own where all the fairies live? That's a hell of a thought. Or is there actually a conspiracy to keep fairy existence a secret from regular people? Could such a thing work? Apparently it does work, because here's a goddamn fairy, they're real.

And on and on and on and on the horrifying implications, they don't stop, they keep spilling like a waterfall as all understanding of the world is washed away before the witnessing of this fairy on my doorstep.

Oh a walrus? Yeah, that's strange. It probably escaped from a zoo. How did it knock? I dunno, maybe they trained it at the zoo.

#fairy walrus #also running through my head are the following thoughts: #1) that post where someone rang a doorbell for a cat and walked away and realised what they'd done when a man answered and was surprised #2) putting fairy and walrus together somehow reminds me of that old thing about how mermaids are just manatees #3) that episode of the TV show Angel where there's a running joke about 'cowboys vs astronauts' cos that's what this is right now #4) also the title of a story called 'The Thing on the Doorstep' kept popping into my head during this. I think that was a Lovecraft one? #5) but yeah this was about being 'surprised' so maybe the thing you can't understand leaves you more numb than surprised? I'd still be shoo #and post

[tigressjasper]

whatre your favorite tv shows and why?

my favourite tv shows are: (I have alot. so im prob not gonna list them all)

what we do in the shadows: funny vampire show that cracks me tf up sometimes its so good

the office: I just i know its cool to hate the american office or whatever but like geninunely I loved this show with all my heart

avatar the last air bender: Just a really solid cartoon like in terms of character and story building world building just fucking classic.

Mr Robot: Watched this with my bf recently and finished it and it was absolutely fantastic. The story the insane idea that what would happen if you could reverse the world’s “debt” to zero and what would happen to us and so forth. But also Elliot is just an amazing character.

Breaking Bad/ Better Call Saul: I’m going to lump these two together because theyre an absolute treat. Also watched these with my boyfriend and I just loved Walt’s descend into his perpetual end. I at that point kept wanting Jesse and Skylar to just leave his dumbass in a ditch somewhere. And also Better Call Saul is even better because its just this feeling of knowing how things end for Saul but you still want to somehow cheer him on.

Kdrama called Little Women: (cw suicide and probably alot more adult themes) This story of sisters and what one would go through in this world to provide a love one with something they never had was so endearing but also at the same time depressing that money would drive people to do what they do. This Kdrama gave me a rush of thriller like feeling. It was insane but in every good way possible. Please if you wanna check anything I list out please check this one.

Kdrama called the Glory: (warning this one has alot of childhood bullying and abuse and sa i think i cant remember) A woman goes after her childhood bullies to ruin their lives as much as they ruined hers. This woman went through so fucking much and you want her to win badly.

#cat answers #nonny #ask me anything #tv shows #im thinking old shows i love and some new ones ive watched. #long post

[rowavolo]

.......rovillette modern au housesitting meet cute ? 😳😳😳😳

#General barks #He hires me off of fantasy Craigslist and gives me a binder full of instructions for his cats and fish #And is so impressed at how I follow it to a tee and mark everything down methodically #So it becomes a regular thing but we actually never meet face to face. Like at all. We're both just so autistic and antisocial #He comes home early from a business trip and I'm napping on the couch with rain asmr running over the tv #And both of his fussy rude cats are fast asleep on me #And neuv is like “oh shit he's cute” #And I help him do his midday fish and cat care routine #And ask a million questions #He answers them calmly and patiently. Btw. #Rovillette

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

If I were to be reckless and buy a 1989 TV vinyl do I get the pink one because it has my favourite cover or the tangerine because it has a bonus track on it 😬

#1989 tv #the answer should be NEITHER #I CANT EVEN REALLY LISTEN TO VINYL BECAUSE MY CAT SPRAYED ONE OF THE SPEAKERS SO THE WIRING GOT FRIED #AND I JUST HAD TO SPEND A DISGUSTING AMOUNT OF MONEY ON A NEW PHONE BECAUSE MY IPHONE BLEW ITSELF UP #and that has set my finances back months #and yet

[eiightysixbaby]

horror movies & chill

word count: 2.6k

pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader

summary: eddie tries to scare you and gets more than he bargained for.

cw: SMUT - 18+ MINORS DNI. this is literally porn with a smidge of plot, sorry not sorry. mask kink, choking, degradation kink on the low (eddie calls reader slut/whore), fingering, unprotected piv, creampie

The TV screen lights up the dark living room, flashes of different colors streaking across the space. You sit on the couch, blanket draped over your lap as your knee bounces absentmindedly. Your boyfriend had wandered off to get something, and now you sit alone in suspense as the girl on screen figures out there’s a killer in her house. The movie goes eerily quiet, the lone heroine peering around her silent home. You know what’s coming next. You’ve seen enough horror movies to know that when it gets too quiet, a jump scare is right around the corner.

And yet.

You scream in unison with the girl on television, two hands gripping your shoulders from behind just as the fictional killer grabs his target. You spring up off of the couch, the blanket falling to the floor in a heap. You spin around, frantic, your body gone cold for a moment. Wicked laughter erupts in front of you as you get your bearings, your heart pounding wildly in your chest.

“God dammit, Eddie!” you shout, hand over your heart as you attempt to steady your breathing. “You absolute asshole!”

Eddie’s doubled over behind the couch, a cheap Halloween store Ghostface mask covering his head. He’s still laughing, trying to get words out and failing.

“Baby…” he says, and you can hear the smirk in his voice even though he’s trying to be serious. What a dick. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think I’d get you that good,” he says, walking towards you.

“You’re such a jerk sometimes,” you reply, but nevertheless you let him grab your arms, rubbing soothing patterns on the skin.

“I know. I am, baby, you’re right. That was mean,” he agrees, nodding his head beneath the black and white mask. You know he'd be giving you puppy-dog eyes if you could see him.

You can’t help but laugh, the initial panic leaving your body. You must’ve looked petrified, and you’re a little mad he scared you so badly.

“You’ll have to make it up to me,” you pout, crossing your arms over your chest.

Eddie’s head cocks to one side, sympathetic, playing it up for you. “Of course, sweetheart. And how do I do that?” he asks, stepping slightly closer to you.

He wants a genuine answer, but you find your breath hitching in your throat. Maybe it’s the way his fingers rub circles into your lower back. Maybe it’s the heat radiating from his body onto yours. Maybe it’s the sound of his labored breathing beneath that sweaty mask that's getting to you. You press your thighs together, suddenly feeling too hot for such a cold October day.

And Eddie can see, through the mesh eye cutouts, the way you bite your lip just slightly. He can see the way your lips part but no words come out, the way you tilt your hips closer to his. And he definitely feels the way your fingers hook into the belt-loops on his jeans, drawing him in.

“Oh my god. Are you into this right now?” he asks, voice dripping with his smug attitude. He’s grinning like the damn Cheshire Cat, if only you could see it.

You don’t answer right away, shifting on your feet. You look down, not sure if you have the gumption to tell your boyfriend the god damn Ghostface mask is turning you on right now. You were scared shitless mere minutes ago. But the way your heart pounds now is completely different to the way it had before.

“Shut up….” you mumble, your face growing incredibly warm.

“You are so fucking into this right now,” he says, laughing as he gets the last word out.

“Okay, if you’re gonna make fun-” you start, drawing your body away. Eddie doesn’t let you finish.

“Waitwaitwait,” he interrupts, pulling you back to him. “I just didn’t expect it, is all,” he reassures, his voice sounding muffled beneath the rubbery material.

You can hear your heartbeat in your ears, eagerly anticipating his next move. You can't quite bring yourself to act first.

He brings your body flush against his, two fingers gliding up one of your arms, sending chills down your spine. He leans his face close to your ear, his breathing audible. “I won’t judge if you like the mask, baby,” he purrs, his voice deeper now.

His other hand wraps around your waist, palm pressing into your lower back, pushing your crotch against his. You gasp, goosebumps perking up along your arms. Screams erupt from the movie, the final girl running free from her potential killer. It’s comedic, really, how you’re stood here ready to jump the killer’s bones.

Eddie’s hips roll, just slightly, but enough for you to feel the tent in his pants. You let out a shaky breath, your body seeking him out, wanting him to give you more of that friction.

“What is it, babe?” he taunts. “You want me?”

“Eddie…” is all you get out, a breathy little thing, your hands pressed to his chest.

And then he’s pressing you against the wall, hiking one of your legs around his waist, his crotch pressing against your needy core. One big hand comes to wrap around your throat, cold rings soothing the flames that lap at your skin. He squeezes, making you delightfully hazy, pinning you hard against the wall with his body.

“This what you want, baby? Want me to fucking ruin you?” he asks, voice akin to a growl, squeezing your throat yet again.

“P-please,” you mewl, desperate for more. You know you’re soaking through your panties, practically aching for him.

Something about not being able to see him drives you crazy. Relying on just his voice, trying to gauge his tone. You’re writhing beneath him, grinding yourself against him. He’s so hard it has to be painful, you can feel it even through the layer of denim covering his bottom half.

“Oh, she’s so desperate, huh? Pussy needs me, baby? God damn…” he rasps, and you throb for him.

His fingers dig into the meat of your thigh where he holds it, giving it a sharp squeeze. His other hand removes itself from your neck, tugging down the zipper on his jeans. You undo the button for him, just as eager to get his pants down as he is. His cock stands at attention beneath the fabric of his boxers, begging to be touched. He ignores it for the meantime, though, releasing his hold on your leg and letting you drop it. He makes quick work of sliding your leggings and panties down, fingers collecting the honey that drips from you.

Groaning, he brings his fingers to your mouth, prompting you to suck them. You oblige, mouth opening and enveloping his digits. Your tongue swipes over them, tasting yourself and coating them with saliva. And then they’re pulled from your lips, teasing your clit before slipping into your cunt. Your leg wraps around his waist once more, allowing for a better angle. He scissors those two fingers inside of you, his breathing heavy, sounding almost amplified from beneath the mask. Your hips buck forward, forcing his fingers deeper. One hand grips your side, pinning you back against the wall.

“Don’t be fuckin’ greedy, slut,” Eddie barks, words sending sparks right through you.

His fingers curl in a ‘come here’ motion, your body feeling boneless as you try to keep yourself upright. He laughs, a devious thing, clearly satisfied with how pliant you are for him. You can tell how wet you are from the slick sounds coming from every glide of his fingers, your body so desperately craving more of him. He adds a third finger, prying you open even farther with complete ease, grunting as he feels the way you tense around him.

“Eddie,” you gasp, “f-feels so good.”

“I know it does, baby, I know,” he coos, smirking to himself at the way your body writhes beyond your control. “Gonna let me fuck this pretty pussy, hm?”

“Yeah, oh god,” you cry, head tipping back as you moan to the ceiling, his fingers pressing so deep inside of you.

He moans despite himself, your cunt completely drenching his fingers. His cock twitches in his boxers, leaks and pleads for you. You’re a little blurry through the eyes of Ghostface, but he can still make out the way your face contorts in pleasure. He loves making you feel like this, loves having you in the palm of his hand.

“My filthy girl, so fuckin’ wet for me all because I put this mask on, is that it? Really gets you going, huh baby?”

He wanted you to like the mask, if he’s honest, and the fact that it’s working on you is driving him up a fucking wall. He needs to be inside of you, needs to fuck you hard and pump you full of his cum before he loses it.

Three fingers slide out of you, squelching slightly as you suddenly clench around nothing. He yanks his boxers down, merely a hindrance to him, his thick cock springing free. You whimper at the sight of it, chewing on your lip as you watch him wrap his hand around the shaft. He pumps himself a few times, lets his pre-cum drip over his fingers, and it makes you ache. You feel like your body is on fire, you need him so bad, white-hot flames licking up your thighs.

A few more pumps and then he’s releasing himself, hoisting you up so both of your legs tangle around him. He grips the meat of your ass, squeezing and kneading the flesh the best he can. He lines his cock up just right, your cunt glistening with your arousal. And you want to kiss him so bad, you want to feel your tongue against his and you want him to bite you, to suck bruises into your neck. The fact that you can’t almost makes you crazier, spurring you on more. You can only imagine what his face looks like as he sheathes himself inside of you, can only imagine those perfect parted lips as he sighs blissfully.

His cock pushes through your slick folds until you can feel his balls pressed against you, his thick length fully seated inside of you. It’s such an enticing stretch to fit him, your whole body vibrating with desire. He rocks himself in and out, in and out, letting you get used to his size. Your cunt has already soaked him in your cream, you can see it pooling where his body meets yours.

“Fuuuuuuck baby,” Eddie groans, panting beneath the warmth of the mask. “Such a needy whore for me, god damn. So fucking wet.”

You whine, canting your hips upwards ever so slightly, the tip of Eddie’s cock pressing so deep inside.

“She’s fuckin’ soaking me, angel. This pussy loves me, doesn’t she?” he says, thrusting into you harder now. He sets a quicker pace, holding your weight against the wall with complete ease.

“Eddie, Eddie,” you moan, waves of euphoria rippling through every inch of your body. He’s so deep and so big and so good.

Your nails dig into the skin of his back, clawing at him through his t-shirt as he fucks you like it’s his last opportunity. You can hear grunts and strained whines falling from his lips, breath coming out in spurts from exertion.

“Babe, fuck, can I take this thing off? Need my mouth on you baby,” he pants, hips snapping against yours and making you cry out.

“Yes, yes - fuck Eddie!” you moan, nearly screaming his name.

The mask is whipped off in one swift motion, Eddie’s unruly curls sticking out. His eyes are wild, pupils blown with sheer need, those perfect lips of his so pink and plump. His mouth is on you in an instant, kissing your lips, your jaw, his teeth biting at your neck. He sucks on the delicate skin, unforgiving as you hiss at the sensation. His warm tongue laves over the irritated area, soothing you and sending a shiver down your spine. You roll your hips, needing more from him, needing him in impossible ways.

“Fucking Christ, you’re so desperate for me,” he gets out through heavy breaths, his cock impaling you over and over. His cocky demeanor doesn’t waver, hands squeezing your ass, smirking when you whine at him.

Filthy noises fill the living room, wet smacks as your dripping pussy sucks Eddie back in for more more more. He glances down to where your bodies join, his dick shiny with your juices. Eyelashes flutter as he looks back up at you, pulling your face to his to kiss you harder. His greedy tongue roams your mouth, his lips demanding in the way they move with yours.

Eddie can tell you’re getting close by the way your eyes roll back into your skull, the way your pussy keeps squeezing him so tight. Your brows knit together as you focus on how good he feels, eyes pinching shut.

“Nuh-uh. Look at me, sweet girl,” Eddie instructs, fucking you faster. “Look at me when I’m making you feel so good.”

Your eyes open, big and glassy as they plead with him. You’re so ready to snap, your body overwhelmed with pleasure as Eddie abuses your cunt. Your fingers tangle in his hair - something you’d missed while he’d had the mask on - and tug, drawing a throaty groan from him. His balls are slapping against the skin of your ass with each rough thrust, fingers digging so hard into flesh you’re sure you’ll be sore tomorrow.

Those big brown eyes of his are incredibly dark, his lips parted as he watches you slowly unravel right before his eyes. You feel yourself about to tip over the edge, about to let go, and he can see it on your face.

“Gonna cum for me, dirty girl? Little slut’s gonna cum all over my fucking cock?” he taunts you, every single word sending bolts of electricity right to your core.

“Gonna cum so fucking hard, Eddie, oh my god,” you say breathlessly, eyes fluttering to a close as you reach your peak.

You’re delirious as you cum, your walls squeezing Eddie so fucking tight. Strings of curse words are falling from his lips as he chases his own release, drawing it closer and closer as you completely soak him. Movements get sloppy, not aided by the slippery mess you’ve created, and Eddie’s breaths grow staggered.

His cock pounds into you one, two, three more times before his hips stutter, hot ropes of cum filling you. You can just barely feel the way he twitches inside of you, every last drop of his release pouring out. Both of you settle finally, catching your breath as you come down from your highs. Eddie sets you down, your feet hitting the ground once more. Your legs feel like rubber, like you might crumple to the floor if it weren’t for the fact that he’s holding your waist and pulling you in to him.

You look down at the floor, the crumpled mask staring up at you, mouth gaping in a perpetual scream. You’re dizzy with realization of what's just happened.

“You’re fucking unreal,” he says finally, tilting your chin up so your eyes will meet his. “Where did that come from?”

“I don’t know…” you admit, cheeks growing hot. “Something about that damn mask,” you smirk at him, getting a waggle of his eyebrows in response.

“I can go to the store right now and get more… who do you want next? Michael Myers? Jason?” Eddie jokes, smiling when you scoff at him.

“Just make sure to keep the Ghostface one around, okay?” your shy request has him grinning, his tongue running over his teeth.

“Oh, you’ll be seeing more of him for sure.”

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson smut #ghostface!eddie munson #eddie munson oneshot #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fanfiction #divider by @cafekitsune

[scoutswritingcorner]

Careful, Baby On Board

Cursed Cat Alastor

TW: The Vee’s, biting, Cursed Cat Alastor being a menace

A/N: I had an idea of Cursed Cat Alastor being in a babybjorn carrier

The day had started out fine, you had to do a few errands around the hotel for Charlie and Vaggie. You were currently finishing eating your snack, Catastor (You originally named it Cat Alastor but that was too long) in your other arm as you ate. It was purring loudly, slowly blinking as if it was about to fall asleep in your arm. It’s paws carefully making air biscuits as it looked around the room ignoring you as you ate your snack.

Sadly every moment of peace is broken in the ever busy Hazbin Hotel as Charlie walks into the kitchen looking guilty as she wrung her fingers together smiling at you. You looked up at her, “Yes Charlie?” You asked as you took another bite of the very very off brand granola bar you had found whilst digging around in the pantry of the kitchen without Alastor finding out but Catastor did find out easily. “So…I have another errand for you cause Sir Pentious accidentally broke one of the bar taps and the part we need is more in town and you’re the only other one who can go..Alastor won’t go near the Vee’s tower..” She explained before smiling at you, opening her mouth about to say something else but stopped when you shrugged, “Okay.”

“..okay? That’s all?” She asked, disbelieving that you would answer so quickly, “Yeah..I’ll head out in a second.” You hummed, throwing your trash away as Catastor made a little growling noise in response. “Hush grumpy boy, we are going on an adventure.” You whispered out to him giving him a gentle kiss to his head which made him start purring more. Silly cat behaves much like your darling deer man.

~~~

After looking at what broke and taking a picture of it to make sure you could find the right things you had headed into town. The only store that was close was sadly in the Vee’s distract of Pentagram City which was dangerous for most of the hotel- Angel because Valentino and Alastor won’t go anywhere near modern technology and barely anyone in the hotel goes this far into pentagram city. So it was up to you, which you didn’t really care much for as you usually tuned everything out and stayed in huge crowds to avoid Vox finding you. The fucking creep trying to either flirt with you and get you to leave Alastor or he just watches you.

Straightening out your jacket to keep Catastor from growling at the amount of modern technology around and calm in the babybjorn carrier you had bought and specifically custom made for him so you could carry him around with you easier. While he was practically light as a feather, your arm would get all tingly after a while, he also tended to pick a fight with anyone who dared venture too close for his comfort. Sadly lady luck was not on your side on this fine hellish evening, first when you got into the store they were completely out of the part you needed and it wouldn’t be shipped in until a week later, so you had to call Charlie and get her decision on what to do, then Catastor didn’t like how the store manager was looking at you and decided to have an early lunch which resulted in you getting kicked out after you had negotiated a reasonable way for them to deliver the item to the Hotel and finally when you thought your day couldn’t get worse. Vox had to show his face to you as you finally got Catastor calmed down enough to get back into the carrier.

You fixed your jacket and gave Catastor a little kiss on his head before turning around to immediately run into Vox’s chest. “What the fuck.” You hissed out angrily glaring up at the tall tv headed demon, who only smirked at you. “What the fuck indeed, I didn’t expect you to be out and about this part of pentagram city!” He said loudly causing you to flinch, you already felt a migraine building behind your eyes. The low static that emitted from Catastor started to become louder and louder by the passing seconds as Vox went on and on about something you couldn’t care about.

“What…what the fuck is that noise?” He hissed out his screen glitching in anger, “My baby.” you replied quickly making the overlord stop in his tracks, “You have a kid?” He asked, watching you nod and open your jacket to show the bright red and black fluff ball that was currently hissing and jerking its head in anger. Bright red dialed eyes glaring Vox down, as it easily escaped the carrier it was in, saliva and foam escaping its fangs. “This is my baby boy and bodyguard while my darling Husband is off doing his own thing.” You replied looking at your nails, nonchalantly. 

Vox opened his mouth to say something but as his hand reached over to touch you that’s when Catastor pounced, claws digging into the Overlord’s chest and screen as he bit down anywhere he could. It was over in a flash as Vox had disappeared using his electricity and Catastor was standing where Vox laid before snarling and growling out wires in his mouth. You smiled picking him up, praising him as you took the red and blue wires out of his mouth. “Don’t need my bodyguard to get a stomach ache later.” You hummed walking back to the hotel.

Alastor is going to have a field day when he hears what happened with Vox. Maybe rub it in the overlord’s face at the next meeting.

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel imagine #gn reader #cursed cat alastor #alastor hazbin hotel

[like-a-diamondinthesky]

five minutes | l.m.h

pairing... bf!minho x gn!reader tags... established relationship, disgustingly fluffy, excessive references to soondoongdori, minho is a cat personified, soft mimo!

operation put your boyfriend to sleep in five minutes is a go.

wc... 1.4k words a/n... ah, yet another domestic fluff fic featuring softy minho. a star specialty! sorry guys this is kinda my fav thing to write ever r u sick of me 😁 anywayz this was inspired by this soft thought and this tiktok like i saw it and immediately thought : lee minho.

ALSO ALSO! HUGE THANK YOU FOR 1K FOLLOWERS! i never would've thought i'd reach this milestone and words couldnt express how incredibly grateful i am for each and every one of you who read and enjoy my works <3 i love you guys thank you so much!

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Minho turned the doorknob and pushed the front door open, greeting Soonie who stood by the entrance with a tilted head. Shutting the door, he hung his bag on the coat rack and bent down to pet his beloved cat’s chin.

“Hi, baby,” the cat nuzzled his head into Minho’s palm and circled around his arm, “where are your brothers, hm?”

Meow… Soonie walked off to the living room as if to answer Minho’s question. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth as he followed his cat toward the faint nose of your favorite series playing on the TV.

When he entered the room, Minho saw your figure strewn lazily across the couch. Dori was cuddled up against your chest and Soonie hopped up to join Doongie by your feet. His heart warmed at the sight of his loves all huddled together.

“Honey, I’m home,” Minho grabbed your attention with his gentle, sing-song tone, a cheeky smile plastered on his face.

You switched your attention from the screen in front of you to the man standing in the doorway, returning his smile and giving a small wave. “Hi, my love. How was your day?”

Minho padded over to you, scooped Dori up against his chest, and settled himself where the cat had previously taken solace in your arms.

“It was alright,” he said, scooching backward to press his back firm against your front. “Tiring, as usual, but it's fine.”

Though he couldn't see it, you nodded in acknowledgment and pressed a soft kiss to his head. You brought one hand up behind his ear to scratch at his scalp, something you had found he enjoyed.

“Do you want to go to bed already? It is pretty late.” From its place above the TV, the clock read 10:37 PM. “Maybe we should move our little cuddle session to the bedroom.”

Minho sighed and shook his head. “But, I'm already so comfy here. Plus, you wouldn't dare disturb the cats, would you?”

“Please, remember the last time we slept on the couch the whole night? I don’t think we want that happening again.”

“Y/n,” Minho called your name, dragging out the last syllable. “My back hurts so much! Remind me why we stayed on the couch again.”

“I told you we should have moved to the bed! But you wouldn’t listen to me,” you snickered at your boyfriend from the kitchen while you continued to whisk a couple of eggs for your breakfast.

You set the bowl down on the counter and walked over to Minho who was still lying on the couch. When you came into his sight, he made a show of stretching his arms and legs, akin to a cat, accompanied by a few exaggerated groans.

“I don’t think I can get up at all today. I should just call in sick,” Minho draped an arm over his face, letting the other fall limp over the edge of the cushion.

“Don’t you have an important meeting today? I doubt your boss would appreciate you missing that on account of an 'ouchy' back.”

“Well, maybe if you gave me more cuddles, I’d feel a bit better.” Minho peeked at you from under his arm, proposing this cute, yet slightly impractical, solution. “Unless you want me to miss work and stay at home with you today.”

“Alright, you big baby.” Rolling your eyes, you moved to straddle Minho’s lap, leaning forward to place a gentle kiss on his forehead. Now chest to chest, you wrapped an arm around his shoulders, letting the other one snake up his neck to play with the hairs at his nape.

The time you spent wrapped in each other’s warmth turned from seconds to minutes, the comfortable silence lulling you back to sleep. Minutes turned to hours, leaving Minho’s meeting unattended and the scrambled eggs forgotten on the kitchen counter.

“Ugh, at least give me five more minutes,” Minho offered as he continued to stroke Dori’s back, drawing a vibrating purr from the cat. “I don’t wanna get up yet.”

“Oh, come on, you have to brush your teeth anyways. Now get your lazy bum off the couch so we can cuddle on the bed.” You grabbed the throw pillow from behind your back and swung it at Minho’s side, accidentally startling Dori in the process. The cat jumped out of the man’s arms, causing him to throw a frown over his shoulder.

“Now look what you did! You’re scaring our babies.” Finally, Minho stood up, offering you his hand to pull you up as well. You met his hand with your own and anchored yourself up, giving him a sheepish smile.

“Oops.” You shrugged and skipped off to the bedroom, leaving your boyfriend with your three cats in the living room.

“Unbelievable.” Minho took a few steps towards the bathroom, paused, and turned back to look at his cats. “Well, are you coming with me or not?”

While your boyfriend finished his night routine, you lay on your shared bed and grinned to yourself. Operation Put Your Boyfriend to Sleep in Five Minutes was a go. You knew Minho was tired, and you wanted to send him off into a good night’s sleep in the most loving way you could.

The hallway light switched off as Minho opened the door to your bedroom, sporting a playful frown. It was time for Step One: Put him in a blanket.

“Come here, baby,” you peeled the duvet back and patted the space on the bed right next to you, beckoning your pouty boyfriend over to you. “Let’s get you to sleep, yeah?”

Trudging over to his side of the bed, Minho slid onto the mattress and pulled the heavy duvet over his body. Freshly washed, the warm, lavender-scented blanket immediately soothed his senses.

“You could’ve at least stayed with me while I brushed my teeth,” Minho continued to pout as he turned on his side to face you, “and, I don’t know, given me a back hug or something.”

Though his tone was playful, you recognized the look in Minho’s gaze. He yearned for your comfort, but he didn’t know how to ask for it. Reaching over, you cupped his face, gently caressing his cheek with your thumb. You peppered a few pecks on the corners of his mouth, kissing his pout away. Perfect timing for Step Two: Give reassuring pets.

“I’m here now, it’s okay.” His hair was soft in between your fingers as you threaded them through the fluffy locks. They smelled faintly of his coconut shampoo.

Tired, Minho let out a yawn, nose scrunched and eyelids shut. He leaned into your touch, humming contently.

Faintly, the door creaked open and you could hear light thuds on the carpeted floor, followed by a slightly louder thud on the bed as Doongie entered the bedroom and jumped up to join you. He stepped all over Minho’s body—drawing out a quiet yelp from the man beside you. You giggled as Doongie finally plopped down on Minho’s pillow, snuggling against the top of his head. This brought you to Step Three: Tuck him in.

With your boyfriend lying under the covers, you hooked one leg over him, moving your hand on his head to tuck it into your neck, cradling his body with no intent to stop any time soon.

For a second, the universe felt still. It was as though the ever-rotating hands on the clock had stopped moving, pausing to witness this intimate moment between you and Minho; as if even the angels in the skies above didn’t want this sweet gesture to end.

That was until Minho decided to take matters into his own hands and execute Step Four: Put one arm out for temperature regulation.

“It's too warm!” Minho whined into your neck, breaking the silence, and removed one arm from under the blanket, exposing it to the cold air. “Ah, that's better.”

He turned on his side and wrapped his now free arm around the small of your back, pulling you closer to him, if that were even physically possible.

Seeing your bodies pressed flush against each other, Soonie—who was previously lounging at the foot of the bed—crawled up the sheets and nuzzled into the barely-there gap between you and Minho, with Dori following suit.

Within five minutes of lying down, the night ended with your small family cuddled together on the warm, cozy bed, basking in each other’s comfort.

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taglist: @kflixnet @jinnixxn @elllisaaa @captainchrisstan @laylasbunbunny @starsandrqindrops @kittymaryam-thebrowniefairy @forlix @mires-empire @quesweebs

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#k-labels #kflixnet #stray kids #lee know #stray kids x reader #lee know x reader #lee minho #lee minho x reader #minho x reader #lee minho fluff #lee know fluff #stray kids fluff #stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios #stray kids lee know #stray kids minho #skz #skz x reader #skz lee know #・₊✧ written in the stars