#tumblr's formatting is weird and I have long since given up
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In Another Life - Sparrow! Ben x Reader
A/N: I haven't wrote fanfics/oneshots in so long lmao but I am way too attracted to Sparrow Ben so i have to. Though please forgive me if the style is weird since I used to write on Wattpad a lot so Tumblr format is still something I’m trying to learn lol so bare with me pls and ty and hope you like my writing!
P.S : Let me know if you want a part 2 for the morning after because I thought about it but I don’t seem to have any ideas on how to turn ideas into words lol
Pairing : Sparrow! Ben x Reader (female pronouns)
Word Count : 2500+ (I’m too lazy to separate it into 3 parts so I apologize)
Warning: nothing special, a make out scene, mentions of death
Y/N has the ability of intangibility, it allows her to phase through physical matter. With Y/N’s ability, she was the only one able to survive the first apocalypse. 15 year old Five found her and they spent other 30 years together before Y/N died due to sickness; meaning that Five had lived a whole life with Y/N, only to go back in time and face the Y/N who lived in the present, a week before the apocalypse strike. Five would sometimes tell her stories of them together in the apocalypse and Y/N would just be a good listener and listen along.
You never asked for much in life.
Growing up, you learned not to ask for much given the background of your family. The most that you asked for was for your siblings to stay together as a family, and to have the chance to grow old with the love of your life, Ben.
It’s funny how you didn’t get neither.
With the disappearance of your second favourite sibling, Five then the death of your boyfriend, your family just stopped giving a shit. Missions stopped mattering, people grew more distant and it was everyone for themselves. Your siblings left the house one by one, and eventually you did as well.
There were times where you would try to meet up with your siblings after your departure, doing your best to still connect with them.
Especially Klaus when he was out of rehab, you always tried to meet up with him. You would always ask him if Ben’s with us, asking him questions about Ben and trying to see if Ben said anything back, but Klaus’ answers were always a slurry of nos, along with side comments about anything unrelated.
Eventually you realized that Klaus only really agreed to meet up with you because he needed money from you for more drugs and alcohol, and you stopped trying with your hopeless brother.
Without your brother’s ‘help’ to pass on words from the dead, you eventually gave up. Perhaps that was better for the both of you, as you two were never meant to be.
-
Life is a cruel mistress as one would say.
After saving the world twice, you really thought that for once in your life, you would be rewarded for the good deeds you had done. Instead, you had to hear your sister tell you that Ben had finally passed on, and that he would love you for the rest of his eternity.
It was heartbreaking that those were his last words to you.
And yet here he is, standing in front of you alive and breathing.
God, if you weren’t in shock, you would’ve socked this man in the jaw for toying with your emotions like that.
“Dad, who the hell are these assholes?” Ben asked Reginald. His eyes scanned the group of the Umbrella siblings before his eyes stopped at you, who was standing at the back of the group, already staring at him with a shocked expression.
“ Y/N?”
His voice brought back a sense of nostalgia, like how your Ben used to whisper your name when you cuddled in his bed, or how your Ben would call out your name with a sense of playful annoyance when you teased him; but he’s not here anymore and this is not your Ben, shown by the roughness of his voice.
His other siblings all stared at you from the second floor railing in shock, surprised that you're alive and siding with the enemy.
Ben froze up, and Marcus stepped in as Number One to take control of the situation. After Klaus’ sad attempt to hug Ben along with the many insults and taunts being thrown to each other, a fight broke out between the two groups (and sadly it wasn't a dance battle).
After fighting some of the Sparrow siblings, somehow you ended up in front of Ben. You both stared at each other in a stand off, you could see the conflicted emotions that swarmed behind his eyes. Hell, maybe he could see yours as well.
Both of you felt reluctant to fight one another yet with a sense of suppressed anger, both of your burning stares slowly toughened. You both stood in front of each other, strangers to one another.
You were the first to swing at him, breaking the tension between you both. Your fist collided with his cheek, his upper body turned to the side with the force. Clutching his slowly bruising cheek, he looked back at you hurt or maybe betrayed? You didn’t care as your own mind was clouded with anger. There was a small pause in both of your movements before his eyes hardening, and he lunged at you.
A tentacle sprung out of his chest, wrapping itself around your wrist. Though it was weird, you missed the weird slimy yet smooth texture of his tentacles. You phased your hand through the tentacle sending a chill down Ben’s spine, as he felt the coldness of your ghostly wrist pass through him. You both fought fiercely, attacking and dodging.
Perhaps the held back emotions you both had finally found a healthy release.
You retreated after seeing your siblings’ defeat, with Marcus’ threat and Ben’s lingering stare on you.
You wished to never see him again.
You hoped that you would never have reopen that closed wound again.
———
The second time you met him was when you went out for a jog with your dumb yet lovable brother, Luther.
Your brother, lost in his own world next to you as you both jogged with the same pace.
Slowly, you felt a presence around you, or above you? Your head snapped up, spotting a few ravens flying as they landed on lamp post and park benches around you, they all stared and observed you. Sensing the danger around you, you tugged on your brother’s shirt as you picked up your pace from a jog to a sprint. The ravens swooped and flew towards you two, they cawed loudly as Luther let out a yelp and turned around, running away from you as the birds chased after him.
Seeing the birds and Christopher, the floating box followed your brother, your sprint slowed as you stared at your brother’s retreating form, trying to catch your breath.
Then suddenly, a sharp pain at the back of your head and darkness.
Ben reached out to grab you before your body hit the floor. His glance softened at your unconscious figure and lifted your body in his arms. His siblings, Fei and Sloane watched him with unspoken pity, knowing how much you their Y/N meant to him before her death.
“ Make sure to catch that big oaf.” He ordered as he turned around, making his way back to the Sparrow Academy with you passed out in his arms.
-
You blinked away the blurriness as you sat up in an unfamiliar room.
The walls were filled with photos and as you slowly walked towards them to observe them, you can see that they are mostly of you and Ben.
The you in the photos looked different, a lot kinder and more gentle, she smiled a lot bright and so did Ben. Photos of you two on a picnic, napping together, sneaked photos of one another, or photos where either of you were trying to cover your faces with a smile. It’s weird seeing yourself living another life you have no memories of.
Your eyes stopped on one last photo. The photo was slightly covered and hidden under the other brighter photos, a photo of you standing in front of the sunset on a grassy field. Your features were hidden due to the brightness of the sun behind you, but you can see that you were laughing. Your silhouette looked so happy, reaching a hand out towards the photographer.
“ That was the last photo I took of her.” You looked back to see Ben leaning against the doorframe. Your eyes returned to the photo before covering the photo up like how you found it.
The silence was deafening.
“ How… How did she die?” You finally decided to ask, breaking the silence. Ben stayed quiet as the longing look eyes left and the cold look returned. His posture straightened out and his voice toughened as his head turned to look at you.
“ Come downstairs, my family wants to talk to you and your brother.”
Then he left.
———
Honestly after Ben let you and Luther go in exchange for Marcus, you really really thought you wouldn’t see them again. After all, the deal seemed simple enough and you have no need of seeing them again.
But life never gives you what you want.
So here you are, at Sloane and Luther’s wedding as the world outside slowly get sucked into a black hole. The happy couple danced with each other, as everyone either joined them on the dance floor or sat around the venue, eating and drinking away.
You were on your sixth cocktail, sipping away with a tired drunken look in your eyes. You looked around at everyone having a good time as your eyes landed on Ben who was sitting alone by himself, hunched over the table in front of a bunch of… shrimp?
Curiosity got the best of you so you made your way over in your maroon dress. As you sat down next to him, his head slowly lifted up from his arms, and let out a loud burp.
“ How… Charming.” You said as you looked at the man who once always had his guard up.
“ Ten people. Ten people left and they didn’t invite me to their stupid bachelor party.” Ben said, his eyebrows furrowed.
“ Well you didn’t make yourself a very welcoming person, so I get it.” You reply, letting out a laugh into your drink as you went for another gulp. A hand latched on to your wrist as you turned your head to look at an upset Ben.
“ Why don’t they like me?”
“ Because you’re an asshole, and you’ve been nothing but rude to them, so why would they like you?” You laughed as your finished your drink, his hand slipping from the motion of your hand.
“ Why don’t you like me?” That’s when your laughter died down and you stared at Ben, who was already looking at you. You let out a sigh, looking back into your now empty cup.
“ I don’t hate you, if that’s what you’re trying to insinuate. You just…”
“ Remind you too much of him?” You never told Ben about your relationship with the other Ben, but it was rather obvious how you two were together in your timeline while he was with you in his timeline. You simply smiled bittersweetly at Ben.
“ Sometimes, but in different way.”
“ How so?”
“ Ben was always so annoying. A nerd and a party pooper. He’s like a tiny gray cloud on a sunny day.” You laughed at yourself, knowing if he was still here he would’ve pushed you jokingly for those comments.
“ Those are all bad things…” Ben replied, confused at your choice of words.
“ Yeah… and he was the best thing that ever happened to me.” You smiled, recalling all the old memories of you and him.
“ How… how did he die?” Ben finally asked after a short moment of silence.
“ I wasn’t there when it happened, which was the worse part of it all. I was sent away on a different mission, and when I came back? No one would look me in the eyes and tell me what happened. I had to force it out of Diego who told me vaguely what happened. None of them were willing to go in detail anyways, just called it the Jennifer incident.”
“ My Y/N… she died alone on a solo mission. Till this day, we still couldn’t find her body. I prayed that she was alive and was simply in hiding due to the circumstances of her mission, but that faith lead to nothing and I eventually had to face the facts. She’s gone.” Ben looked ahead, his eyes glossed over as he recalled the memories of himself crying over you, never returning to him again.
“ How was she like?” You asked, placing a hand on his shoulder to comfort him.
“ She was kind. Always so kind even if this kindness required her to sacrifice herself. She was stupid but she always looked for the best in people. After all, she saw the best in me.” Ben smiled to himself and you smiled with him.
“ Both of our better halves died and now we’re just left here, isn’t that just so sad.” You laughed as you went to go pour yourself another drink, perhaps to have fun, perhaps to drink your sorrows away, who knows?
The party continued in the back as you two who were sitting at the bar poured your hearts out to each other, drinking more drinks. The topic slowly changed through the night as you two went from talking about your dead ex lovers to your interests and funny stories of your life.
“ No stop, you did not fucking do that to her.” You laughed as you took another sip of your drink.
“ I did! I also blamed it on Alphonso so him and Jayme both got chores for a whole week as their punishment.” Ben laughed along with you as you propped your elbow on the table, holding your head up as you looked at him with half lidded eyes and a small smile on your face. The alcohol in your system slowly introduced a hint of sleepiness as you blinked slowly at the man. You let out a yawn.
“ Okay, I’m gonna head to bed.” You said as you stood up and stretched.
“ Tired already?” Ben asked, looking back at you with a tired smile.
“ Why? You gonna miss me?”
“ Maybe a little.” He smirked as you laughed. You reached out your hand to lightly pat his cheek as you slowly leaned forward, closer to his face. With a few inches left between you two, your eyes scanned his face as his eyes did the same with yours.
“ Goodnight Ben.” You whispered and kissed him on the cheek. You turned around and walked towards the elevator.
The elevator dinged as the doors slid open in front of you. After stepping in and choosing your floor, you leaned against the wall of the elevator, your eyes closed as you tried your best to stay awake. Suddenly, a hand stopped the doors right before they closed, making a noise that surprised you and your eyes to snap open. And there stood Ben, outside the elevator panting as he stared at you, his eyes so intense as a surge of energy suddenly filled your body and you stood up straighter, staring back at the man.
He headed straight to you at the back of the elevator, his hands found their way to your face as his mouth found its way to yours. Your mouths moved together in a unison while one of your arms hooked around the back of his neck, and your other hand reached up to grip his hair, lightly tugging his roots. He let out a groan as your bodies pressed closed to one another, grinding against each other.
The elevator dinged once again, your mouths separated from one another, slightly panting as you staring at each other with lustful eyes.
“ We take this back to my room?” You asked. You tilted your head and leaned into his hand, his fingers brushing your cheek while you played with his hair.
“ Sure.”
And you all know what happened next.
#ben hargreeves#sparrow ben x reader#sparrow!ben hargreeves#sparrow!ben x reader#justin h min#sparrow ben hargreeves x reader#sparrow!ben#sparrow!ben hargreeves x reader#ben hargreeves imagine#ben hargreeves x reader#tua imagine#tua x reader#the umbrella academy#the sparrow academy
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Skyrim Female Head UV: The Definitive Post
We begin as like a cooking blog's recipe, with a sort of vaguely related yet unnecessary anecdote. I've been thinking about putting modding stuff up on this blog, lately. I used to run into the problem on Discord where I'd be like: man, I'm spamming this channel, who even cares about this stuff anyway? So I made my own dev thread in which to spam these posts. As more and more people started joining, though, and still not replying to anything I wrote, I ran into the same issue where I've now become hesitant to post whatever I want in my own dev thread for fear that people will find it annoying. Silly, I know, but I figure that this here, tumblr, is the option with which I cannot go wrong, right? So long story short: this might turn into a mostly modding blog now.
I'm about to do an explanation of UV mapping as an introduction to this post, for those who know very, very, little about it. Many of you reading this may already be modellers or texturers who don't need this dumbed down, so you are welcome to skip to the big red UV map if you wish.
Without further ado: this is Nur.
Nur is what I would call a 'chatterbox', but she was made in the same way as any paper fortune teller. One thing that you should note about her: she is three-dimensional. I have power over Nur's state of being, and I can unfold her.
Unfolded Nur looks very different. We can see that her mouth, usually a triangular bipyramid minus a couple of faces, is now four separate triangles. We could also conceivably understand this as a '2D' version of Nur. It's flat, but it has all of the colour information that ends up on the surface of her 3D self; the area painted red is the 'mouth' part, the top squares on the left and right are the upper part of the 'face'.
Now, if we were to make a 3D mesh of Nur, we could use something like the second image for her texture and tell the computer which area of it should be shown on the surface of a given polygon. We'd do this by giving every point two dimensional coordinates, instead of inventing some kind of new format where every voxel in 3D space is assigned a colour—after all, it's only the surface that matters, right? This process of giving 3D vertices 2D-coordinates on a texture is called UV mapping. What you should really take away from this is the UV map holds the information of how to wrap a texture on to a mesh.
And, since all vertices already have X, Y, and Z coordinates, (and W is used for something else,) their two-dimensional texture coordinates are U and V.
Now, UV maps can be different from a piece of paper you fold in a few ways. What you mainly need to remember is that in UV Maps, we aren't bound by angles, length, or area – the lines making up a UV map are 'stretchy'. This mapping allows, then, for you to 'stretch' the texture over the surface of the mesh.
Now that everyone is (hopefully) on the same page, let's move on to the subject of the post!
This is the UV map of the female head mesh in Skyrim. Right away, a few weird quirks are going to stand out about it.
It is not truly vertically symmetrical along any X-coordinate.
It is kinda symmetrical along a line a short ways to the left of the centre.
Even along that line, the eye sockets are not symmetrical.
The symmetry along that central line starts falling apart towards the boundaries of the image, where there is not really very much symmetry whatsoever and what there is seems to fold more along the actual central vertical axis.
Now, if none of that stuff stood out immediately to you, or you are having trouble seeing it, that's absolutely fine! This image here should help to clarify the things I just mentioned.
The white line in the middle highlights the true centre of the image, from which (as you can see) the UV of the mesh's 'central line' is offset. The sort of lens-shapes either side of it trace the UV map's eye sockets, which are quite different.
Now, is all of this stuff fine? I mean, kind of. No, it's not really a good UV map (there are serious issues, for example, at the back of the scalp) and the symmetry problems all suck for working with it as a texture, but it's still useable and, for a high-poly to low-poly workflow, won't really impact things all that much for the creator. Painting on to the mesh, baking from a sculpt – all these will suffer for a worse UV map, but are still essentially the same process as with a different UV. The game's textures were made for this UV map, and Bethesda seem to have been able to manage fine with it.
Credit to Bethesda Game Studios. A section of the 'FemaleHead_MSN.dds'.
The issues come in more for people working on a 2D level. Making textures in photoshop? Painting some tintmasks? Then these things are going to annoy you, especially those darned eye sockets. So, is there a better way?
A Better Way
Sorry, that section header is kind of misleading. There's an extent to which this is subjective but, honestly, I don't think there really is a better way. I firmly believe that you can't fix Bethesda's UV because it's not broken. A little annoying to work with? Sure. But it wasn't meant to be another way, and it works with the textures provided by the game. There is nothing to fix.
On the 15th of March of 2012, Enhanced Character Edit (ECE) was published on Nexus Mods, in its description claiming thus:
Fixed asymmetry head mesh for Female.
Enhanced Character Edit had not 'fixed' issue of the off-centre axis of symmetry. What it had done was make the eye socket on the right symmetrical to the one on the left in the UV map. Behold, the ECE head mesh with the vanilla game's texture.
On the left: the ECE head mesh with the vanilla textures. On the right: the vanilla head mesh with the vanilla textures, as Todd intended.
ECE needed its own textures, made for the 'symmetrical' eye socket UV. There were already existing texture sets made this way (even reflecting the same eye; I suppose people preferred the left side), so it wasn't too great a problem—ECE was providing a fix for existing mods, really!
Except, well, it's a little more complicated than that. You can change the mesh, and the textures along with it, which works. This only affects the player character, however—generated face data for NPCs must be regenerated or, in the case of NPC overhauls, manually changed by the user, a thing few users actually know how to do. Pretty soon, though, people were using ECE in their character creation, and then for the NPC overhauls that they put on Nexus. Skin mods were being made specifically with use of this head mesh in mind, like SG Female Textures Renewal, which actually includes ECE as a requirement for this reason.
So everything is great and we can just use ECE, right? Sure, we have to regenerate all of our NPCs' faces which requires the creation kit and a lot of time, but that's workable. Well, not quite. Some mods have mismatched diffuse maps and normal maps when it comes to eye sockets, like Tempered Skins, which has ECE's eye sockets in its diffuse, but bases its normal maps mostly off of vanilla, including keeping its asymmetry. Mods like Mature Skin don't even use the ECE sockets, which means that those textures will look wrong on NPC overhauls based on the ECE head meshes. This issue ends up happening both ways, too—users of ECE-based textures have an even worse issue when using a mismatched mesh, to the extent that Enhanced Female Head Mesh was created, a mod that solves an issue that isn't in the base game. The ECE sockets are that ubiquitous.
Credit to DomainWolf. A comparison image from the mod Enhanced Female Head Mesh, showing the issue that ECE-based textures have when using the vanilla mesh.
Incidentally, this user has also created tintmask mods. Many of the textures included in those would have to be manually edited in order for them to look right on the vanilla head mesh.
We can see that the effects of ECE's change ripple outward without ever really becoming understood by the common modder. When installing High Poly Head, users are presented with the option of Symmetrical Eyes (Female). The average user probably doesn't know what this means, let alone whether the texture that they're using is based on ECE. If they choose the wrong option, many won't think to go back to the FOMOD. ECE itself has been far surpassed in popularity by RaceMenu on SSE—how many people would think to install it for its head mesh alone? Even Enhanced Female Head Mesh, which is specifically mesh-only and for SSE has only ~25 k downloads as of writing. Popular skin mods with symmetrical eye sockets have millions.
This whole thing impacts almost all modders. Most of them know barely anything about it. So, this stubborn ass who refuses to use the 'fixed' eyes and manually converts all of their NPC mods by painstakingly fixing things in NIFSkope wanted to write a post aggregating everything they knew about the subject, endeavouring to maybe improve people's awareness of it.
If you read all of this, thanks! I'm honestly surprised at how long it got. I hope you enjoyed my writing.
Hello, future me here. If you read this before this message was added, please note what I had earlier said about ECE not working on SSE was wrong. I have updated the previous sentence to reflect this information.
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W.I.P Wednesday
Posted with ten minutes to spare! I was tagged by @adelaidedrubman
This is part of my unfinished first (very) rough draft of my FC5/TMA crossover fic in which Skunk, Judas, Mary and Daisy all have statements sent into the institute. I'm still trying to get a hang of Judas's voice and I'll admit this is mostly an infodump I will need to clean up a lot in coming revisions. Also tumblr is going to eat my formatting which is important to the aesthetic of the fic :(
STATEMENT #0160402
[CLICK]
[PAGES SHUFFLE, SOME FALL ON THE FLOOR AND THE ARCHIVIST GROANS AS HE BENDS TO PICK THEM UP]
ARCHIVIST
Paper files…not that I don’t appreciate physical media however my office is already a catastrophe. This could have easily been a digital file.
[SIGH]
ARCHIVIST
Alright let’s see.
ARCHIVIST
Statement of Judas King, regarding a specific interaction with Gulf War veteran Jacob Seed in Whitetail State Park in Montana. Original statement given April 2nd, 2016. Audio Recording by Jonathan Sims, Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, London.
ARCHIVIST(STATEMENT)
I don’t know why I'm writing to you. I mean, I don’t think I believe in these things and I found this place online when searching for similar experiences. London is very far away so I can’t imagine you guys care about fucked up murderers in rural Montana. I might as well just say it, maybe typing it out will help me to rationalize or comprehend it.
I have lived in these mountains my entire life. Seventeen years spent surrounded by their ancient, solid presence. They’re my most important constant which, I think, is why this experience has shaken me so much. I haven’t felt comfortable here since…Well since it happened. It’s not like strange things don’t happen. Strange things are bound to happen in secluded places far from civilization. Mostly our strange goings ons are easily explainable. Things like teenagers leaving carvings in trees or making weird sounds at night, wasting deer syndrome causing deer to hold their heads at weird angles and get far too skinny or people simply being too alone for too long and their minds creating faces where there hadn’t been faces before. My point is that it’s not a rare occurrence for people to claim the paranormal in the park. This was not an easily explainable mishap.
For a little bit of backstory I am from Hope County Montana. We are a very rural community in south western Montana. The most interesting thing to have happened here in years is when Grace Armstrong won a medal for sharpshooting in 2004. So when three men from Atlanta, Georgia rolled into town it was pretty noteworthy. The Seed Brothers. They brought a lot of chaos with them. Joseph, the middle one, came claiming to be a preacher but he’s not like any preacher I’ve ever seen. Then there was John who I think was the youngest. He was some big shot lawyer back in Georgia. He started buying out our farms and logging companies, slapping the name of their church on everything. Project at Eden's Gate. They call Joseph ‘The Father’ and think he’s some messiah trying to save them from the end of the world or something. It was all weird from the beginning but nothing violent. Not until a few months ago. Their oldest brother’s name is Jacob. He was a soldier in The Gulf War, army I think. You can see it too. I’d always thought that when people talk about soldiers having a ‘far away look’ that they were being…I don’t know, dramatic? Yet when I look at Jacob Seed I can tell he’s still in the war. He’s still reliving whatever gave him those gnarly scars that seem to over take the whole right side of his face. That is about where my sympathies end.
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Hello! I sent an anon a looong time ago asking if it would be okay to send some of the notes I took when reading Sarah. Sorry that it took so long!
At first I was trying to figure out how to format it and send them to you. I remembered reading "night flowers shirking from the light of the sun" on the google docs pdf thing, and it had the notes on the side. I thought that would be easy to read so I was trying to figure out how to convert my botes to that.
Then, I accidetally deleted ReadEra, which I used to read your book and was where my notes were. I panicked and redownloaded it, but my data was gone.
Then! While looking through my files! I realised that it made routine backups of its data, including backups that should be after I made all my notes! Hooray!
So I've been able to compile all my notes now. I've decided to forgo making a google doc esque file and just compile the text and send it to you in an ask.
The asterisks in the text was what I actually highlighted, the rest of the paragraph(s) is just for context. I read the snippets you gave before you released the book, so that’s why I referance some things that haven't happened yet (although, I did come back to past parts of the book after I read later parts of it to add more notes, I'm pretty sure).
Initially these notes were just meant for me, so I get a bit personal in some of them (and some pf them are worded a bit weirdly. I did make minor edits to some of them to make them more legible). So sometimes what I say doesn't really align with character motivations. Sometimes I am also just plain wrong about character motivations as well asdfwj.
Also I cut out some of the notes, and the spacing might be weird since tumblr made this into a single text block when I pasted it into an ask, so I had to manually add all of the paragraph breaks.
With all that said, here's the notes!
*****
"...the home of Desmond and Suzanne C. Bell, where the *childless* couple lived together from 1930 until Suzanne's peaceful death..."
--
If this were a real thing I'd be like "Why did you even bring up/emphasise that they were childless? Weird ass thing to do." But since this is a work of fiction.
I believe Suzanne was the one who had a secret? If I am remembering that correctly from the character intros with the picrews. I wonder if she's also trans? Although, a couple unable to conceive together could still have children. So I suppose that doesn't support a trans argument.
Like, they could adopt or have a surrogate. Many ways for a trans-Suzanne-cis-Desmond to have children.
*****
"We had briefly stopped for a chat while you were chasing your hat, and she had given her name as Suzanne and his as *Mr. Frank Carlyle*."
--
Ah! She took her dead lover's name! Also, given "the Carlyle boy came back", that implies that she also took his last name.
(Future me: ?? I do not know what I meant here. They already stated her name as Mr. Frank *Carlyle* in this line...
Edit: Oh wait I get it now. At the time, I didn't know Sarah was pretending to be Frankie, nor did I know Frankie's last name. So I thought that when she detransitioned, she took on a derivative of Frankie's name instead of going back to her deadname to remember him.
I also knew that in that snippet that person was talking about how Frankie dying was strange, since "the Carlyle boy came back", which meant that Carlyle was his last name.
So I thought Sarah took on the name Frank to remember Frankie, and took Carlyle like in a married way. I didn't know she took his name wholesale because she was impersonating him.)
*****
"*I shook my head. "By God, no. This beautiful creature deserves to live in freedom. Can you imagine something so unique and so mesmerizing surviving against all odds just to be kept in some cage as something to be poked and prodded at? It'd be a downright crime."*"
--
Ah, after reading the part where they got the croc, I see the parallels to queerness.
*****
"The deer stood motionlessly in the garden...[]
"... *I need to see it from up close*," I whispered. "Otherwise I will never believe myself.""
--
Me moment. Wish I could go outside to look at a wondrous deer. Or a strange, wondrous sight in general. Like when that car burst into flame in front of our house during the night, and we all gathered around to watch.
*****
"*Four silver eyes glistened at me in the shadows. The deer watched as I placed one foot in front of the other. It took a hesitant step towards me, then another. I saw the muscles moving underneath the snow white fur. Then, suddenly, it took a giant leap and disappeared in the fog.*"
--
I wonder what the God thought of him. I think it's a good person. I wonder if it had goodwill towards him because of how he said it would be awful to kill it.
*****
"Clouds sail past on the *lake's mirror-like surface*"
--
Wow what a pretty lake!
*****
""*We have to start somewhere*," I replied. "If I know how he fell, I know how he landed, but more crucially, I know what he would want to stay alive for."
--
Ah, I kinda expected it to be a twist, where Ignatius only sent them out so that they would not have to be there.
*****
*"Sa…" - he took a deep gasping breath - "Sa….rah!"*
--
I appreciate how she restarted. Reminds me pf myself. I would've been worried that the pause would have been long enough that my words sounded like two syllables, rather than two halves of one word. So, I appreciated how she started, just to make her words clearer.
Also, I wonder why she said this. I might've said this too. I want to correct you about my name. I always do, but especially now. I'm about to die. It's all about me now. Don’t I get to have this one thing? I want you to know what my name is, at least.
But I will not tell you it is mine. I will give you no context. I so desperately want to tell you it is mine, but I can’t. Doing so would decrease my chances of survival by way of decreasing my chances of receiving good medical care, and it would decrease my chances of being tolerated well in my potentially final moments.
I can't have that. Surviving is more important. But I at least want you to know my name, and that you're wrong about me. I can be satisfied with that. It's okay because I have at least that. "Sarah."
*****
"He had run there through the deep green forest, *trying to hide from his mother after breaking a pot at home*."
--
The real villain here is the mother (or parents). This wouldn't have happened if she did not react so poorly to similar things that the child is scared enough after breaking a pot to leave the house.
*****
"...the God rose once more, towards the surface, towards the light, to find who the culprit that had woken *it* was."
--
Hrrg,,, I love it/its gods,,,,
*****
"...*mesmerized by what he saw. And he stepped out into the waves, and followed the sweet sounds of the flute into the cool blue. And he thought of nothing but those slender fingers, and the rose-coloured eyes that seemed to contain the moon and stars on summer mornings.*"
--
Dunno if I want to interpret this in an aro or gay way. If a gay way, it's potentially really funny. Worst crush ever. Immediately drowned in a lake because of it.
(One sided, ofc. Tragic! You were accidentally so ethereal and mesmerising that the boy you wanted to interact with got a crush on you that Immediately killed him. Sad!)
*****
"...it remembered in horror how once upon a time it had been chased into the lake by the townsfolk, *who could not understand it, and it could not understand them.*"
--
Damn epic autism moment,,,, everyone knows that epic autism moment when you are so thorourghly misunderstood by others, and how despite how much you struggle to, you cannot seem to understand them either,,,,
They shouldn't have been such an ass to the God.
*****
"*And so the God left the child on the shore among the wildflowers, and it returned to its eternal sleep, to forget what it had done and forget once more about the world and its cruelty. But they say to this day, on moonlit nights, if you toss a pebble into the lake and find yourself followed home by a white animal, it is the God taking pleasure in seeing you.*"
--
Ah! Comment on this later!
Edit: It is later an I. Still cannot seem to find the words to convey what thoughts and memories this sparks in me. Oh well!
At least I know. Hope I don't forget though. At least I can say that this passage is significant to me!
*****
""It is a sad story, isn't it?" Sarah tilted her head. "After all, the God was not evil, was it?
It was simply there. It could not know that the boy would die for trying to understand it."
"*Perhaps. Or perhaps* it knew, deep down. Perhaps it thought another ghost might save it from haunting itself.""
--
Damn, he really wants to play devil's advocate, huh?
*****
"...[The Storyteller's] split lips drawn back in what was a smile that reminded me of a *snarling fox*."
--
Ah, I get it now! They *are* a fox! This is just like in dbttlor where a character is compared with a nonstandard but still familiar animal and it's like, wow! What a novel and therefore interesting and apt comparison! And then it turns out it wasn't just a random animal for sake of novelty, but it turns out they actually *are* that animal!
*****
""Do me a favour. Don't tell Suzanne until it has happened. She is such a good girl, I'd hate to see her worry in my last moments."
I chewed my lip. Then I lowered my head. "*I promise.*""
--
DAMN. What a difficult position to be in. She deserves to know but why should Sarah (I think) make herself uncomfortable to be better for Suzanne? She's dying. It's all about her.
*****
""Where are you traveling to?"
"Oh, well…" The Storyteller chuckled. "Nowhere, really. I just wanted to get around a bit. Not stay in one place for too long."
"But isn't that dangerous?", Sarah inquired.
"Dangerous?" They raised their eyebrows. "*Why…ohh, right.*"
--
*Monkey King voice* "Ohhh right. Mortality."
*****
"*But there was no ghost. There never had been. There had only been love and what it had left behind.*"
--
YO. COOL ASS LINE. I like how it wasn't supernatural, and instead was just grief. More relatable.
Also reminds me of the "Wasn't actually supernatural but still equally or even more horrifying" trope, which I love.
Like the story of those kids camping around a river who hear the story of a ghost who'll drown you, and at night they hear someone stepping around their campsite, so they get scared. Then cops show up the next day saying someone was killed at another campsite nearby. So they're like "0_0 ...Were they ...*drowned*?".
And the cops are like "No they were shot." So they're like "Oh.", then "OH. A MURDERER WAS AT OUR CAMPSITE LAST NIGHT."
The scares feel more grounded that way, which is cool (not that I don't like supernatural scares as well, 'cus I definitely do).
*****
""How come they left the house with all their belongings still in it? I have often asked myself that." I kicked a pebble out of the way.
The Storyteller sighed. "*Their only son drowned in the lake.*"
--
I wonder if this is the boy from that Gramma's story.
*****
"I thought of the child that had drowned in these peaceful green waves. *Suddenly I no longer felt like going for a swim.*"
--
Lol number one "guy who is going to drown" thing to say. Also, that body was recovered. I'd be more disturbed by the two corpses that stayed down there.
*****
""Was that a heron?", they inquired.
"Yes, a white one," I replied. "It flew across the lake. Looked quite majestic."
The Storyteller stopped dead in their tracks. "*We should go back.*""
--
Damn does the god just kill random people? It didn't strike me as a bad person.
*****
"I tilted my head in confusion. "Why?"
*"Trust me." They chewed their lip. "It will rain soon."
When I looked up, the sky that had just been stark blue had turned ash grey.*"
--
HUH. WAIT. What is the extent of their power? After reading the book, they kinda seem like a normal guy but with immortality, the ability to turn into a fox, see out of their rings, and with knowledge about the God.
Like, they were clearly just saying this so they didn't have to say "Yeah that white heron was a god and I want you to stay away from it in case it kills you."
But it *did* rain. Can they predict the weather as well?? (Maybe that's not even a power. They've just been around so long they can tell what the weather will be.)
*****
"Lightning made the *black lake* glint ominously in the distance"
--
Urgh,, I love lakes <3
*****
"Gramma Margaret smiled with *stained teeth*"
--
OUGH. I love stained teeth! It's always so cool! Every character ever should have stained/yellowed teeth.
*****
"Her teeth glinted in the flickering red light like *wet metal*."
--
Ooh, cool.
*****
"*I woke up, suddenly. It was as if a heavy fog had been lifted from my mind.
It was cold. My neck hurt. My eyes were burning.*"
--
Damn. Moment when you exit hyperfocus and are suddenly hit with all the status conditions.
*****
"*The Storyteller put a hand on their mouth and I felt strangely watched*"
--
Ah, because the ring on their hand, which they can see out of, would be facing towards him.
*****
"*Sarah was lying at the bottom of the stairs, her hair a mess, sobbing.*"
--
Ooh! Just like at the beginning! Maybe this is what happened to her when she was old!
*****
"Her skin was milky *white*"
--
White-ass.
*****
"The deer flinched when the fox bit into its leg. *The smaller animal was whining and crying in pain, but persistent.*"
--
Does biting into it physically hurt them?
*****
"*We do not want them to leave and it seems like, for the moment, they are content staying.*"
--
Aww, friends <3
*****
"Rolling [the crane] over into the grave *pushed my heart inbetween my ribs, but I kept myself contained.*"
--
Ooh, what a neat phrase!
*****
""Wouldn't that make a lovely story?"
"Of course it would, I just have to say, I am not particularly fond of the idea of being the protagonist in a ghost story""
--
Hehe, the fact that he agreed that that would be a lovely story...
Like, I thought he would go, "No! That is awfully morbid!", but no. He's like "Yes, that would be a very lovely and cool story. I would just not like to be in it."
I must say, I like this more. I'm gonna add interactions like that into my stories <3.
*****
""No, I mean…it doesn't look alive. It's full of dirt and its feathers are falling out and it's viciously pecking at itself. It looks like it should never have come here in the first place."
The Storyteller tilted their head, but said nothing. *They probably thought I was losing my mind.*"
--
Oh no, my friend the Normal Person Storyteller is gonna think I'm a weirdo for thinking something supernatural happened! :(. They're just a normal human with no contact with that sort of stuff, so of course they wouldn't believe me :(.
*****
"[Suzanne] sighed, glanced at me uneasily. "Will you wake me if anything new shall happen?"
"*Of course.*""
--
NO YOU WON'T. YOU'RE NOT GONNA. HOW HORRIBLE*.
*Not saying Ignatius is horrible. This is a complicated situation, and I don’t know what the right choice is. But this is a horrible situation for Suzanne to find herself in.
*****
"*Heavens, no. What on earth would she do with me? She's an angel, what am I? A milkman's son, who writes quite awful poetry in his free time. No, no, I think it is better for the both of us if I just continue to stare from a distance…and fall a little more in love with every passing day…"*"
--
Girlie, this is unfair to her! You are assuming how she feels and acting on that assumption. She should be able to come to her own decision regarding that (being in a relationship with you) with all the information in front of her.
For example, what if she liked you back? It's mean to assert that she simply cannot fall in love with certain people, when she has never said so herself!
Also, you're implying that she is quite shallow to not fall in love with common people just because they're not big fancy fraughts.
*****
""*I'm quite sure she would not mind knowing about your feelings*""
--
This too! What's the harm? Even if she doesn't like you romantically, she clearly loves and/or cares about you. She would still love to be friends after. Nothing would change except that you respected her ability to come to a decision on her own, and that you gave it a shot. You would give her the info, instead of just assuming.
*****
""*Perhaps not tonight*""
--
Pfft yeah. Don't confess when her mum's dying.
*****
"*I hesitated, unsure what to say. Then I lowered my head.
"I should go back to reading that book."*"
--
LMAOOO
*****
"*His body…his body was like mine, but it was so beautiful*"
--
FUCK. FUCK, I LOVE TRANSNESS
*****
""*You don't even realize what you've summoned. Good Lord. You have doomed yourself, my friend.*""
--
Did they think he was in on the supernatural shit before this?
*****
"*The Storyteller left silent as a ghost two nights ago. I woke twice during the night, once because I heard the door, once because a fox screamed outside, almost a sorrowful wail.*"
--
Aw man... The friends part :(.
*****
"Sarah and I spent the day inside, with *her drawing*"
--
Ooh, I was wondering who was drawing those pictures!
*****
""I started falling." Her voice was quiet and shaky. "I fell and fell, deep into a bottomless pit. *And then I woke up.*"" --
I wonder what it means that she dreamt this. Not as in the meaning of it, but as in, does that mean the god can make up dreams for you? And has the power of foresight? And can directly influence what you see/think? (Like straight up make it up fully. Instead of influencing one's thoughts to lean a certain way. It's instead the exact scenario, the exact wording.)
*****
"*On the way I noticed that we had forgotten to bring our laundry inside and some of it had scattered across the yard. Too bad, but nothing terrible - we had all the time in the world to wash it again, after all.*"
--
Aw man. Not realising that this means that the dream was a premonition, and that they are in grave danger. "Oh well, we have all the time in the world to wash it." No you don't. This marks your end. Last night truly was a quiet end of the world.
*****
"With a scream I ran back out of the barn, *leaving the deadman with my face inside.*"
--
OOH. Does he become a crane? When that person later says a strange looking Frankie hung out with the Storyteller, was that even Frankie? Or the crane?
*****
"Diary entry of Sarah *Winston*"
--
Ah, so that’s what her last name was before she took on the name Carlyle! Sarah Carlyle, nee Winston.
*****
"*Something has been wrong for a very long time.*"
--
And it's finally come to a head.
*****
"*Bell Senior's old man says he was quite spooked by the change. Took a crucifix with him every time he delivered the milk. Just in case.*"
--
Dude, she's just some guy :/.
*****
"*Avoided that blue house like the plague. You'd think he saw a ghost there.*"
--
Maybe Frankie didn't come back at all... Maybe it was Sarah...
But they look quite dissimilar! Did she straighten and dye her hair?
*****
"*He had a disagreement with his mother and father one night, just a few days before Sarah passed, packed his things and left.*"
--
Okay so I'm almost certain that it was Sarah who came back, not Frankie. By this time it was already Sarah. Did she have a disagreement with Frankie's parents about pretending to be him?
*****
"*For a while they thought it was his youthful stubbornness that kept him from returning.*"
--
But then why did they think this? Did they truly think she was Frankie? Or were they just saying that's what they thought in order to cover up Sarah's identity whenever somebody asked?
*****
""...It was assumed that during his hot-headed travels, he had simply been robbed and murdered. An old woman was killed in the area just a month later, so it seemed reasonable."
"Oh, what a tragedy." I thought about the night Frankie had described in his diary, the night when he told the Storyteller about the beheaded old woman. *Gramma Margaret.*"
--
Is this the same Margaret that is Sarah's mother? I don't think so. Is this the same old woman who died a month after Sarah went missing (as Frankie)? I don’t think it is, since Gramma Margaret died *before* that happened.
*****
"*I sat at the kitchen table, staring at the singular candle illuminating the house*"
--
Me fr. But also, just like the dream!
*****
"*the Storyteller standing in the doorway*"
--
Just like the dream!
*****
"*"I'll go get the spades if you want me to," the Storyteller said quietly.*"
--
Grrahhh!! He is the crane!!
I wonder if he will come back as a crane supernatural. I wonder if the zombie crane ever existed, or was just an illusion made by the god to foretell Frankie's death.
*****
""Down by the lake." I glanced at the ground beneath me. "There is…there was a willow where we always used to sit and tell each other stories…most of them old stories by the *old blind woman* in whose house we lived. We would tell those stories, or spin new tales out of them, or dream how else they could have ended…the willow fell in the storm.""
--
Okay see, for a sec I wondered previously if the old woman was actually the Storyteller, and they were shapeshifted. But I was like, no. She's not blind (and her eyes were described as milky, not red. At least I think. But the woman on the book cover had red eyes).
But now I'm thinking it may be so? But I didn't know the storyteller could shapeshift into anything besides the human form we see them in and the fox one.
Or maybe it's like with the crocodile. Related to but not the same. Why would the Storyteller be beheaded?
*****
"*"I am sorry," I whispered. "I was going to tell you, but your father made me promise not to say a word. He did not want you to worry."*"
--
Ah, there it is! Thank goodness she found out beforehand!
*****
"*Suzanne laughed; it was a hollow laugh. "Did not want me to worry! He tumbled down the stairs with a sound as if the world was ending, broke almost every bone in his body and he does not want me to worry! Heavens-" She had begun to cry. "Oh doctor. How cruel can one be, for goodness' sake?"*"
--
Literally!!
*****
"*Then, suddenly, Desmond reached for Suzanne's hand and began pleading with her. Her hazel eyes were haunted when she replied to whatever he had said, but he vigorously shook his head and smiled, tears running down his white cheeks.*"
--
Epic suicidal ideation/talking someone down from it moment (might not be what they're actually talking about).
*****
"Arms tightly wrapped around each other [Suzanne and Desmond] stood there in the snow, almost becoming *one singular grotesque silhouette melted together.*"
--
Aro moment. The House Party moment.
*****
"As I looked around the room that had been our bedroom I saw the jar with the two-headed crocodile standing on the windowsill and softly exhaled.
"Will you take it with you?", the Storyteller asked.
"Of course," I replied. It resides on the sill of my childhood bedroom now, the *pale skin* of the animal"
--
Okay, see. I was wondering how this was related to the god. When I first learned of the croc (from the snippet before the story was released) I thought this was the god, in a different form. But the croc is definitely dead, and I don’t think the god can be killed. Plus we see the god later, and the croc never disappears.
Then, I went, "wait! The croc was never actually described as white, so they're unrelated!" But now that is not so.
*****
"*I walked across the damp brown leaves, grabbed the deer by its antlers and shook it until it stared right into my face with one eye from each head. It looked different from this perspective. Surprised…no. Scared.*"
--
Yeah! Kill that bitch, Sarah! Teach it what's what!
*****
"*It did not always feel good, but damn it, it felt strong.*"
--
OUGHFF. Adding this one to the quotes pile!
*****
cracked blue building
--
So it really is her house? I thought she was going to Frankie's house. So is she not impersonating him? But then, why did she take his name?
Maybe she is detransitioning to an old identity that was forced upon her, and not pretending to be Frankie. But since the name she took on was Frank, maybe she swapped deadnames with Frankie when they were choosing their names?
*****
"*The deer is outside again and staring at me. I think it might be crying.*"
--
Ah. So that is why it is here tonight.
*****
"*A fox is wailing out in the field.*"
--
I'm glad they are here during the last night of their friend.
*****
"*I think it's quiet now.*"
--
And so she is dead. But how did the fall occur? Did she call the deer?
*****
"Swiftly, I walked over to it and with hesitation and shaking fingers, reached beneath its shirt. Indeed, there was Sarah's *sweetwater pearl necklace*"
--
!!! She kept it...!!!
*****
"*I realized in shock and horror that the man that had died under my roof was no man at all - it was Sarah I had been treating. All these years she had returned to hiding as what she had always been perceived as*."
--
That is oddly understanding of Ignat.
*****
"What a strange feeling. I believe half of my soul was left back there by the lake, waiting for the other half still flickering in my heart to reunite with it."
--
Waah! She returns to Frankie and her life on the lake!!
*****
"*How do you know that story?*"
--
"I don't want to tell stories. I don't want their lives to be laid out like they're some fascination. A [] for people to ogle at for a while. They were real people, more than some scary ghost. And they deserve privacy.
But. Their stories are being told anyway. I do not want to tell stories about them. But I have to correct them every time I hear them. Let them really be known. Adding to those tall tales."
*****
"*Before you become a deathbed confession or someone else's ghost story*"
--
I like that he acknowledges that he has become wrapped up in this, and that because it would make such a good story, the person who he is writing this to and who is dear to him, Andrew, will most likely also be affected.
*****
"*Author's* Note:
...The author vividly remembers the chill that ran down her spine whenever she saw this person in the now overgrown yard, smiling like a fox baring its teeth."
--
Is this Susan from the second book, "Susan's Hell Sprint"? (Sick ass name btw. Truly one of the titles of all time.)
*****
I wanted to say that I really liked your book, and I can't wait to read the next one! ^_^
Ayyyyyyyyy amazing notes!!!! I had so much fun reading these!!!
Suzanne is actually trans! I tried to drop a couple subtle hints about it but nothing too obvious, such as the childless thing and the deep voice. Also, the moment Desmond and Suzanne talk outside she actually confesses this to him.
As for Sarah and Frankie, they traded names when they came out to each other, and when Sarah returned, she simply took on her old name.
The author isn't actually Susan, though that would've been cool. The author is some random teenager in the 2010s. Susan's Hell Sprint is set in the 1970s :).
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RULES & INTRODUCTIONS !
— MINORS DNI ! —
hey everyone! my name is red, and I genuinely hope you are all having a great day so far! I'm essentially making this to let everyone know what I post and the rules for requesting.
WHAT I POST —
first things first: as I stated in my blog description, this is mainly a marvel blog, so if you see me occasionally reblog or post something that is not marvel, no you did not. trust. 💞
secondly, going more in detail about my postings, the types of content I will be making: x reader oneshots, aesthetic boards and general edits. since I brought up x reader content, this brings me to the next section.
WHO I WRITE FOR & RULES ON REQUESTING —
• peter parker:
ps4!peter
peter b. parker
• natasha romanoff:
mcu!natasha
comic!natasha
• wanda maximoff:
mcu!wanda
comic!wanda
• kate bishop:
mcu!kate
• jessica jones:
mcu!jessica
comic!jessica
• felicia hardy:
insomniac!felicia
comic!felicia
and I'll edit for pretty much every character!
RULES ON REQUESTING!
the first thing that I'm going to address is NO I don't write smut. that being said, I might reblog it or some of my jokes may be in a more mature manner. so if you were curious about the warning at the beginning of this post, that's why.
I would also like everyone to be patient please, and that goes for both my writing as well as my aesthetic making process.
as the previous statement suggests, I mainly take requests for x readers and aesthetic boards.
this should be a given, but please be kind when requesting! if you're being rude and demanding, your request will be ignored.
if something about your request is outside of my comfort zone then please understand if I decide to decline your request or I leave out part of it.
and lastly, if you're unsure about something, just ask! I won't get upset or anything - as long as you're polite, of course.
-
and that's it! don't hesitate to pop in my inbox! whether it's for a request, or you simply just wanna share what's on your mind with me (so long as you're not being weird lmao).
sorry if all this looks off, I'm not used to formatting on tumblr.
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3,5,7,10,11,16,22 and 13,you said 3 years but what has changed since nice then?
EEEEEE tysm for the ask!!
3.) any recurring images/elements?
I'm not really that good at using motifs tbh, but I have a lot of scattered feathers deliberately placed in a few scenes. Smoke as well, even though I haven't illustrated any of those yet. I'll leave the interpretation to the readers :]
5.) pick a theme song for the tv adaptation.
Laplace's Angel by Will Wood! (this has been the theme song from before my Will Wood phase started, it's just got very similar themes)
7.) how would you describe the relationships between the characters in the story within eight words or less?
Not friends, just people sharing the same pain.
10.) if your story is titled, why did you choose that title?
It was always going to be called after whatever I named the organization. I had this idea of a kind of cultish group of assassins who worshipped a god of hunting. Since all the characters are animals hunting is pretty much just murder in this world, after all. My placeholder name for it was Artemis' Children, but I wanted to create my own mythology since I know virtually nothing about irl myths. the name Ullyca (and Ramedin while we're on it) was a result of me mashing words together at 1am until it sounded right. (I think it sounds cool though)
11.) give a general summary of the plot/world/characters.
Set in a world populated by several species of anthropomorphic animals, a serval named Umbra finds herself covered in blood, a body at her feet. With no memory of what happened, yet desperate to keep her involvement in this event from coming to light, she winds up making a deal with an organization of hitmen known as the Children of Ullyca, and by the time she realizes she's in over her head, it's too late to turn back.
16.) imagine the entire story takes place but in the meantime the characters all also have tumblr. what kind of (terrible) tumblr posts would happen?
Ahhhahahaha yk I'm pretty sure Fier has a tumblr (if anyone in this series does it's them) but for the other ones I'm absolutely sure Amala would be blazing Umbra's vent posts all the time, Hadron would do nothing except rb the worst takes known to mankind, Rena would have a bait account and Uriel just uses his to promote his fanfiction. Not sure what Kan would use his for, but something tells me he keeps getting blocked because he never made a profile and everyone thinks he's a bot.
22.) you have been given unlimited funds to make two adaptations of some sort, however you cannot make any other adaptations of any other sort. which two formats do you choose?
Ohhhh this is a tough one. I've always thought CoU would make for a banger animated series but for the second adaptation? Maybe a novel. I would have really loved for it to be a novel (even if the comic medium does fit better)
13.) how long have you been working on this project? what has changed from the outset?
SO much has changed in the past three years. Hell, not even joking this thing started as a bunch of Beastars ocs until I realized they didn't have anything to do with Beastars anymore and I was just a furry. Now, aside from the anthros and the canniballism, they have absolutely nothing in common.
The architecture has changed, it used to be just normal human cities but somewhere between the original chapters and the Call to Action entry I changed the buildings to use more natural elements like trees and cliffsides. I still struggle with it (a lot) but I love how lively and a little wild it looks.
Some designs have also changed, the uniforms used to all be plain dark grey jumpsuits but now all of them have their own unique design for each character for different purposes (Kan's uniform has armor plates, Rena's is a wetsuit, etc.) Out of all the characters, Kan has changed the most physically. I didn't know how to make the "grizzled war veteran" look I wanted so he just kinda looked... weird. Also he didn't have any scars which I later realized was stupid, he's been an assassin for 20 years.
Speaking of characters, Umbra's character has changed a LOT. She used to be the definition of an edgelord, a cold hearted killer with no remorse. However that was boring as shit and I thought it would make for a more compelling story if she really didn't WANT to join the CoU but was pressured into it.
I used to post pages on Instagram (i know, ew) but I realized the story was very disorganized and stopped to work on the script. I'm remaking the first chapter bc my art has... definitely improved. This is 2021 vs. 2023:
I know they say don't redraw old pages but... I think you get why I started over in this case lol
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“Your stories are great. Will you be writing any more penis shrinking stuff?”
This was submitted as a post instead of an ask, so the formatting is a bit weird. (also, I don’t think this pinged the tumblr ask alert. (Or the tumblr notifications are busted. which is also super likely given how rarely I see that I have new asks) )
The answer to this question is typically Yes. I have an outline I’ve been fleshing out, I just haven’t written it yet. I currently have like.... 4? Active outlines. In various stages of ready for writing, but I’m gonna have to finish Something this week because it’s the end of the month.
I’ll just throw out my current WIPS.
Next part of Next Big Thing (slow growth macro.) This one is very close to done and is actually in the writing phase, so I’ll prolly just wrap up this.
New Troy and Co fic. (Still in the outline phase. I have some fun ideas I am toying with)
Nude Beach Dong Shrink fic. I feel like this is coming together very quickly, but I can’t say when I’ll start writing phase.
Next Claves story - actually an old idea that I want to get back to doing. I was originally going to try to get this done this month, but I am so far behind schedule on it, I’ll probably just do the NBT one.
I’d like to go back and put the finishing touches on old novel-length pieces. So like, AA and Juiced. Juiced is a weird one because I know the endgame but not the steps to get there. I also need to go back and re-read the last few chapters to figure out what day I am on because the story has a very defined finish line in terms of timeline. That will determine how many more scenes will go into it.
AA - I’m sort of in the endgame on this one, but I have been away from the series so long, that it’s tough to get back into the headspace for it. I feel like I’ve gotten better at pacing novels and such since I worked on this one, but now I have to go back and figure out where I was with the pacing of the old story.
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I'M CURIOUS AF WHO ARE THESE TWO MONSTERS NEAR POOR SCARED HARRY? 😳😳😳👀👀👀
SHAKES AND VIBRATES
oh!! oh you wish to know my monsters?? u wish to hear GOOMT's monsters?? WELL!!!! ha ha ha OOOHHH
OOH I'M GLAD YOU ASKED!!!
(no rly bless u, ilusm, thank u for asking and ur vested interest, i'm REALLY SUPER appreciative ❤️❤️❤️💖💖💖🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚)
and ofc, since u know i gotta, here is the obligatory link to my Harry/James glacial slowburn, Get Out Of My Town, and GOOMT’s corresponding blog for updates, aesthetics, art, and all that jazz!
NOW KEEP IN MIND: these are only descriptions of the monsters in the full picture i did here. there are others in the monster cast too, that are LOTS of barrels of fun, and VERY intricate and intriguing in their own way, just as the ones mentioned/following.
(the picture itself is a part of the GOOMT actor AU, where it’s all just a show, folks! (consider it to the likes of the Silent Hill blooper reel, which we were ROBBED OF in later games >:( 🔪 @ konami 5ever) and you can find its tag here.)
CONTENT WARNING: descriptions of child death, James Sunderland
JAMES SUNDERLAND
James Sunderland is a stupid little idiot weasel and conduit of Silent Hill. he has so many problems and is not going to do anything about it because he’s a stupid and depressed little wanker who doesn’t have any rights, not that he ever did in his life.
after the events of Silent Hill 2, James pitched himself into the lake but the town wasn’t gonna let him off easy. it had plans, and needs, for James. our boy here crawled right out of Toluca Lake after haphazardly (and illegally, but whatever; who’s gonna give him a ticket? .. yeah that’s what i thought) parking it in its depths and has remained in South Vale ever since. James sure darn well tried, but he cannot escape through death at his own hand, or otherwise. in fact, the monsters he (and we) have come to know and love have gradually become disinterested in him.
(as for Pyramid Head? huh! well, it’s weird; James hasn’t seen him around in quite a while.. hrm.. really gotta wonder what’s up with that.. ;3c )
what it means to be a conduit of Silent Hill, however, is a little complicated; but the baseline is that he’s Silent Hill’s little battery pack. it needs him and through fun time psychological (and physical, now and again.. but the monsters don’t wanna play anymore, for some reason..) torture, James does what he does best and wallows a sure hell of a lot, thus accumulating nutritious and scrum-diddily-umpious negative power for the town.
oh 👂 you ask, “and for what does it need it, and why James?” great question!
wouldn’t you like to know, weather boy?? ;) but you can read about it all riiight here, babey!!
ok ok jk jk (sorta lol) (bc i mean come on. ISN’T he a monster, tho......? ....hrrmmm hmm hmmmmm........ sources point to yes, if SH2 has anything to say about it, LOL)
let’s ACTUALLY start with my HONEST personal favorite:
THE MEMORY OF HARRY
(this monster was very aptly named by a good friend of mine - hi Gospel! - and so credit must be given where credit is due.)
ART BY capitán solsikke
(uncertain of where solsikke is keeping their public art contacts/social media now, so solsikke, if u happen to see this, pls drop ur deets so i can link back to u pls :< pls..)
FURTHER NOTE: to reduce the long post scrolling and bc tumblr’s image insertion format is horrid, i’m going to put additional art/links to the GOOMT blog posts for Memory of Harry, bc y’all REALLY gotta see the actual faithful renderings of him i also commissioned from capitán solsikke
the Memory of Harry first appeared at the end of GOOMT’s Chapter 27: Yeah, Me Neither. his description is as follows (and ADDITIONAL NOTE: Harry is, GOOMT-canonically, left-handed):
A lean man teetered on exhausted legs. Because his entry only allowed them to view him from the side, from that angle they saw he wore a brown leather jacket discolored by smoke stains and was torn at the shoulder. The jeans on his legs were tainted and ratty, and his shoes only held together by determination.
From what could be told of his profile, this man’s face had retained most of its features, despite the crusty, black skin covering every inch. His dark hair lay flat on his head, save for a wispy few strands that fanned loose over his brow. Misshapen scarring created a thick, blinding patch over his visible eye. And lastly, the reason his nonstop weeping was muffled was due to a mouth sewn shut so many times that it was replaced by nothing but a bulky, knotted mask.
But this visage was nothing compared to his cargo. In his hand he held a smaller one attached to a thin, tiny arm, of which was connected to the raw and burned corpse of a little girl. She was on her belly, her head hung like a sack of sand between her shoulders, obscuring her face, and her stringy, oily black hair dangling and swaying with every move the man made. On her body was a tattered blue dress, perhaps once long-sleeved as suggested by the remains of ripped fabric at her elbow, and black shoes over white socks patched by dried orange blood and char. Wherever she was forced to go, she left a wet streak of black and crimson in her wake.
James scrutinized this gruesome new monster hard while it shuffled directionless and wracked with demoralizing sobs. It didn’t seem to know they were there and moved at such a slow pace that James figured they were in no immediate danger. He looked at Harry for guidance.
Harry, however, was in no state to do anything but remember how to breathe. His face was contorted in grief and oddly, recognition. James eyed him, somewhat disturbed by it but moreso uncertain, then took his stare back to their visitor.
The victim of a fire unknown changed his direction, somehow having noticed they were there and faced them. Wherever it could be seen, his skin was indeed blackened, cracked, and flaking like bark, and revealed that both of his eyes were blindfolded by the scarring. Beneath the leather jacket, which sported a broken replica of their flashlights, was a sweater vest that bore a royal blue color somehow notable under the charcoaled damage. It was frayed at the hems and layered over a shirt that was once white. But now that he had confronted the resident and veteran full on, James could have never been prepared for what brought it all together:
The bereaved’s left hand which, until now, had been hidden on his other side, was not empty - and never could be. His arm hung lifeless and his fingers welded, forever clutching, a long, rusted, and bloody steel pipe.
James’s lips parted, and his heart dropped like lead straight through the floors.
Neither moved, and the man, at his snail’s pace, sought to meet them. The next garbled cry caused Harry to twist his bludgeon so hard in his white-knuckled fists that his arms briefly trembled. Each step drew the walking corpse a little bit closer, and still, they couldn’t find their feet. With the pieces having fallen together, the implications of what was before them pulled the ropes in James’s stomach tight enough to make him vaguely nauseous.
James heard himself utter a whisper of his companion’s name. His voice seemed to shake Harry out of his stupor, and in time to choke back sob of his own before it began.
He didn’t even feel his vocal cords nor his tongue move when he spoke again. “Is that..”
“It’s me,” Harry said thickly. “Yeah. That’s me.”
===
he was, considering his importance, intended to be used sparingly - and he is. this monster is (thus far, and understandably,) Harry’s least favorite monster, lmao. Harry would really rather this guy Didn’t, but hey - ain’t nobody here that’re gonna let HIM call the shots any time soon!!
the Memory of Harry is an extremely foreboding warning and tale on two legs. he is also 100% capable of ruining Harry’s day in a pinch, just by existing.
(Harry really doesn’t like to think about him.)
CRYING, BURNING WOMAN
(who is taking a moment out of her day to T-pose to get her point across; and of whom has not yet been properly rendered in art form BUT I’M WORKING ON FIXING THAT 👀 @ all local artists with commissions open)
this monster tends to travel in packs of two or more. she’s first seen alone, and is the debut monster in GOOMT’s story, in Chapter 5: Stop Stopping
From the fog emerged a staggering, loose-limbed creature that was closer than either of them had anticipated. It shuffled on buckled legs, its ropey arms swinging carelessly in the momentum. The head drooped on its neck, masking its face from everything but the asphalt, and they ought to be grateful for it. The entirety of this abomination was ravaged in sickening swirls of exposed muscle, black rot eating away at its flesh, and raw, peeling skin. Like most of the hell creatures in Silent Hill, it was an impossibility. The thing moved as though it was treading through tar, but these two were wise to the fact that that shouldn’t be undermined.
The stench of it reached them as soon as they saw it, triggering bile washing up Harry’s throat, and gritted disgust on James’s face. It smelled of charred meat forgotten in an industrial oven fueled by sulfur and was heavy with the unmistakable odor of wet, moldy clothes. Every breath it took sounded labored and painful, and vaguely feminine. In its wake were slicks of thick blood, and if they dared to be any more observant, flung drops of blood from its stiff fingertips as the arms swayed.
she’s seen again, in Chapter 10: Turn Around, Look At What You See
The smell reached them. It was the same they’d experienced before: burnt flesh and moldy clothes. Harry remembered what she looked like, how her arms swung and her spine could barely support her. Her flesh had been peeling, burnt to the bone in some places, and her head hung to conceal her shame. It sounded like there were more than one of these tortured women - perhaps two or three.
and in Chapter 11: The Pocket Travel Guide To Silent Hill, James reflects upon them - and one other.
There were the crying, burning women, and the creature made of static and fumes. The former were forever smoldering, blighted by singed holes in their baked flesh, and dripped black, acidic ichor. Some were bald, their scalps incinerated, and others had long black hair that was both wet and decorated with kindling flames. When they staggered, their faces were obscured by the way their heads hung on broken necks, and when dead, Harry and James rolled them over to unearth the fact that their eyes were blinded by melted skin and their mouths silenced by a red square made of steel. How their screams were audible from behind the plates, they didn’t know. Their bodies reeked of gasoline and scorched wood.
===
(sensing a pattern, here? >;) )
now in that, there’s mention of a “creature made of static and fumes”. she is not pictured, and has a different appearance - and she’s a radio mimic. the radio (huh.. radio..... what’s going on with that radio.....? is it broken...?? hrm. better take it anyway) mimic.
as you can imagine, she’s also one of Harry’s beloved favorites. ;3c
and finally, however quite (so far) unfairly depicted and appearing MUCH later into the story:
THE LOST BOY (1 of 2)
his (and his better(?) half’s) first appearance comes in Chapter 54: Touché
And before one could say “knife”, galloping, meaty claps on vinyl tile heralded the proper, and fashionably late, introduction of the quadrupedal couple. Upon emerging into the artificial headlights, however, they recoiled. At once, and reminiscent of their earlier behavior on the security monitor, Harry and James watched them volley apart. Furthermore, their emotions seemed to be unchanged from the scene with the girl in the corridor.
Demonstrating that behavior in person sowed the seeds of interest, for as intimate as they seemed to be, they also showed signs of having a mysterious, innate fear of being seen together. The predators chose their quarry and took sides on an archer’s bow. During their slow, deliberate advance, they verified the surmised size discrepancy as correct - and the larger made James its target.
Its hunched skeleton made it hard to decipher its entire build, but anyone could see that it boasted the hallmarks of an athlete: lean, sturdy, balanced, and if it stood on its legs, would probably surpass the six foot mark. In contrast, its partner, who had business with Harry, posed an all around average height and body type. As far as fitness went, this was one that strongly hinted it preferred the bleachers, as there was barely any muscular definition on it at all.
Other than that, the pair’s bodily design was nothing special. Moist and raw burns covered their unpalatable topography from head to toe, mapping out ice cream swirl streets hued in apricot and ripe peach, and pronouncing the sewage brown lagoons dotting them like Dalmatians. Their figures were ugly to be sure, but they weren’t the focus - their faces were.
At one side of the mouth, a necrotic, flat, fabric string vertically secured the starting base of a pattern. It was a simple motif, too: laced shoes. Criss-crossing over the lips and tunneling north and south through septic punctures ringed by crystalized pus eyelets, the strings wove impenetrable diamonds all the way to the other side, triple-knotted in gunky yellow paste, and the uneven ends left dangling. Once upon a time, these mouths must’ve had something to say, or needed to say; but none were permitted to listen. They, like all other fiends, were victims of silence.
Harry and James didn’t much care for the trendy, stringent enforcement of ‘silence is the best policy.’ A while ago, Harry, at least, began to suspect that there was significance behind each individual, unique means; granted, the allegation seemed like no-brainer. All aside, the two here helped build his case.
He’d chew on it later.
Two slanted holes pretended to be a nose, and above them sat two anomalous eyes. One visualized the world through an eternal squint, the eye semi-obscured by a grafted skin bandage. The second, in juxtaposition, told further tale of torture. Stapled to brow and cheek were the upper and lower lids, stretched beyond capacity to plate the living, twitching centerpiece netted in spider silk threads. Firetruck red painted the inverted inner lids, and by merciful grace of the monster’s exotic biology, the socket and orbit glittered from moisture that preserved its functionality.
===
RUBS NASTY LITTLE FLY HANDS
ooh, this pair - OOOH, this P A I R. i LOVE this double trouble. i was VERY excited to introduce them, because they are A TREAT. these boys are a first for GOOMT’s story for being boys, so gosh..... gosh, ho hum hrmmm hmm mmmmrmmm hrrrrmmmm, wonder what that could mean???
>;3c
but yeah, as you can see - their details are quite immense and uhhh.. all we got up there right now is zombie Orange Julius lookin’ out for his next big orange to squeeze. soon, buddy.... don’t worry, my guy; soon.....™️
aaaaand THAT is THAT ON THAT!!!
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR INTEREST IN MY MONSTERS OF GOOMT, AND GOOMT ITSELF 😭😭😭😭 WORDS CANNOT DESCRIBE MY THANKS AND JOY (despite the 232,398 of them in GOOMT so far but eh, who’s counting)
forreal tho THANK YOU so much for your ask and your curiosity, it means the absolute world to me and i’m shoving it into my mouth and storing it in my cheeks. GOOMT is the love of my entire life and also my bane of existence and i LOVE talking, and sharing aspects of GOOMT* for all that will listen :3c
*except for lore, future planning and scenes, and things not otherwise already published because i am a VERY superstitious writer and VERY cautious of what, and to whom, i share. i won’t answer questions or talk about GOOMT’s lore and planning to anyone - not even Ren, my best friend and patient editor since ch10, who doesn’t even go here. so rest assured, it’s not (the royal) you; it’s me. 😔
AND NOW since you’ve either made it or scrolled to the end, the detailed depictions of the Memory of Harry by capitán solsikke under the cut, and their original posts from GOOMT’s blog:
POST FOUND HERE
POST FOUND HERE
AND BONUS ROUND: ACTOR AU
POST FOUND HERE
#silent hill#long post#goomt#ches writes#YEEHAW BABEY!!!!#THANK U TUMBLR USER HEATHERCHASESYOU YOU ARE SUCH A FUCKIN LEGEND#i s2g u make the world go 'round...... ur a total and undeniably genuine soul 😭🥚❤️❤️🙏🙏❤️🥚🥚🥚🥚🥚❤️❤️💖💖🥚🥚🥚 BLESSINGS ON U FOREVER
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hello, sorry if this is a weird ask, but recently i've been wanting to open up requests. however, the last time i did anything like this was three years ago, i'm a little rusty (also deleted tumblr for like two years but eh), so could you possibly, pretty please <3, give me a few pointers?
again, i realise this may seem like a weird ask (and embarassing on my part) so i'm sorry in advance!
hello petal !! don’t you worry this isn’t weird in the slightest and I’d be happy to help however I can ^^ congrats on re-opening your requests!!! especially after three years! I wish you all the luck <3
to be honest I haven’t taken requests on this blog at all and for good reason. I am a little finicky and easily stressed skdkdk so I know that it isn’t personally for me. but from experiences with past blogs I’d say you should absolutely make a request rules post and link them in your navi or your bio!!!! include things you do write (e.g types of readers, genres, tropes, kinks, the type of fic, fandoms, etc) and also the things you will not write (same applies).
ask that your followers be as detailed as they can be, or not, if you wish to be given more creative freedom! it’s better to be clear. also have a request limit so you don’t get overwhelmed—I would recommend 5 to 10 since you’re just getting back into it but it’s totally up to you. formally accept and reply to requests through your inbox but make sure to still format them like you would a fic. a little thing but it catches attention and it looks nicer, so you have a better chance of getting more requests!
lastly and most importantly I want to remind you that you aren’t obligated to fulfil every single request you receive. some may make you uncomfortable, or they just aren’t something you’re drawn to writing, and it’s completely fine if you don’t write them.
as I said I haven’t taken requests in a long time, so it might help more to ask a writer who does. I haven’t a clue if the etiquette has changed but the few things I mentioned is atleast a good start point!
#asks#and do Not pressure yourself!!! they are requests not commissions beloved#take as much time as u need working on them
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Once a respected hero. Ever since you absorbed the powers of one of the world's most notorious and dangerous villains, saving countless future lives, people began treating you as if you were a villain, despite your heroic efforts since. Much to your frustration.
(A writing prompt I responded to. First time usually Tumblr to post so the formatting might be a little off. )
“Never imagined an angel would find himself in The Pits of Hell.” Gary laughed, enjoying his little play on words. Incorporating the bar’s name into his line. The ex-villain pushing his chair beside Cold Shake’s, taking a seat next to him at the bar. “Are you finally going to become one of us? Did my powers awaken something in you?”
“No. This is just the one place where I’m used to people glaring at me. It reminds me of better days.” Cold Shake sipped his drink, hoping that would end the conversation. He was exhausted beyond belief, having to deal with five press conferences already. However, if it would have avoided this conversation, Cold Shake would have accepted another five.
“Better days? Any day you’re still breathing has a chance of being better than the last. Didn’t some hero say that?”
“Charlotte Break.” Cold Shake answered, having repeated that quote hundreds of times to starry-eyed children. He loved how much power those words had. No matter how hard life was, whenever they heard those words, it was like none of it mattered anymore. They had faith that something could change. Perhaps that was the difference. He wasn’t naïve enough to have faith.
“Right, right. Charlotte Break. It might sound weird coming from me, but I didn’t mind her, even in my villain days. It was rare to find heroes that stuck to their principles. She wasn’t perfect, sure. None of us are. But you knew what to expect from her.” He raised his vodka to the heavens and smiled. “She also believed in a better world. Naïve, idiot. Rest her soul.”
“Rest her soul.” Cold shakes words came out as a mutter, his lips sitting on the edge of his glass, not taking a sip just yet. He put the glass down and sighed. “Why are you here? The bartender told me you didn’t come in on Wednesdays.”
“You trusted a villain to tell you the truth? Keep that up and I’ll be toasting to you soon. Why do you think I’m here?” Gary asked, leaning forward. He tilted his head, peering at the hero with his head on the counter, trying to see every flick of emotion on his face.
“To mock me. You don’t have your powers any longer, so I doubt your visit is malicious. Unless you hired someone to dispose of me. If you wish to mock me, go ahead. You’ve earned the right.” Cold Shake frowned, finally taking that long awaited sip of his booze.
“NAHAHAHA. YOU’RE SOOOO STUPID. A REAL DONKEY OF A MAN. I WOULD CALL YOU AN ASS BUT-T THAT WOULD BE AN INSULT TO ASSESS.” He snickered. “See what I did there?” Even as he said that, his head didn’t leave the counter. Gary watching the small flick of anger as an eyebrow curled for a second. “Your body’s too honest. You don’t think you deserve this at all and you certainly don’t believe I’ve earned the right to mock you.”
“OF COURSE I DON’T.” Cold Shake tossed his glass at the ground, while grabbing Gary’s sweater with his free hand. “I gave my life for this city. I’ve spent months in hospital, given up any chance of having a normal life and what do they do to me? They treat me like I’m a monster. I had to steal your powers. There was no other way. How else could I have stopped it? Now I use those powers for good and they tell me I’m not wanted at villain attacks? They would rather people die than have me there.” Cold Shake raised his fist, about to start a fight. Some of the other villains leaving their seats, only stopping when Gary raised a hand. Before he could throw the punch, he let out a pitiful sob, releasing the sweater.
“There was no other way. Unfortunately, we are the only two people that understand that.” Gary slid a few banknotes towards the bartender, giving an apologetic smile to him. Not wanting Cold Shake to get kicked out of the bar in his state.
“Why? Why am I the bad guy? They let you go, said I used excessive force.” He tried to speak after that, but it was only coughing and sobs. The words unintelligible through the mess of sounds.
“No one’s ever seen abilities stolen. It’s a scary situation for both sides. Listen, Karl.” Cold Shake stared at him, stopping his sobbing momentarily. It had been so long since someone had called him his own name. It almost sounded foreign to him at this point. “Maybe it’s time to give Cold Shake a rest and be Karl. Not that Cold Shake can’t come back. I think Karl needs some time away from this mess.”
“Karls a nobody. I don’t even remember what Karl liked to do.” He said, wiping his eyes on his sleeve, sniffing back a few of his emotions. “I don’t think I can go back to being a nobody. It’s not even an ego thing. I can’t stand seeing people get hurt. I’ve watched too many people die. If I’m not at the scene, I can’t help.” “If you take a break, you will be able to save more people. Can you help anyone in your current state? If I started burning this bar, would an intoxicated Cold Shake be able to stop me? Or would he only further his poor reputation? You need to rest and let Karl breathe. That masks suffocating him. Just be yourself. You even have the mask off already. I feel part of you knows it needs to happen.”
“Can’t drink with a mask on.” Karl said, giving a light chuckle after he said it.
“Touché.”
“Why do you care? What’s happened to you? When we used to fight, you were so filled with hate. Now you’re making jokes and living like a…. like a…” Karl tried to find the words, not wanting to be rude.
“Like a human being? Not some cartoon asshat that wants chaos? Losing my powers was the best thing that happened to me. Powers have a habit of consuming you and burrowing into your brain like a parasite. I never wanted to do the things I did when I first started. At first, I only wanted to make some money. Then the money I made wasn’t enough, and I needed more. Later on, the money didn’t matter, it became about power and being feared. I know my powers are a horrible thing to carry, but I think you’re the only person strong enough to carry the burden. Don’t let it corrupt you like it did me.” Gary patted Karl on the back, offering him some silent condolences for the mess he had given him.
“Did you intend to go through with your plan that night?” Karl said, asking a question that had been on his mind since the incident.
“Yes. I intended to fry the brains of everyone in that arena. I don’t even know why anymore. Maybe it was about power, or maybe it was a bout of insanity. I’m glad you stopped me either way. Now it feels like I can think for the first time in years. So, thank you.”
Karl thought over what Gary had said before standing up from his chair. While his face was still full of sorrow, there was a small glint of pride flowing into the hero. Karl’s stance a little taller as he stood up. Before he left the spot, he turned to Gary.
“Thank you. Perhaps you’re right about this.” He gave Gary a smile before turning to leave, only for his sleeve to get caught by the former villain.
“If you need to talk, I’ll be here, even on Wednesdays.” Gary teased, getting up to walk him to the door. “You know, there was another hero I didn’t mind during my villain days. I never minded that Cold Shake. He was annoying and couldn’t color coordinate a costume to save his life. But he stuck to his principals. I hope Karl does the same.” Gary said, opening the door for him.
“Heh. It’s as you said. Well, actually it’s as Charlotte Break said. Any day you’re still breathing has a chance of being better than the last. I’m not out of breath yet.” Karl left The Pits of Hell, flying off into the sky like an angel ascending into heaven. The shining sun colliding with his body, giving the scene an almost divine feel. Gary watched him fly off before returning to the bar.
“I hope you find yourself. The world needs Cold Shake.”
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The Social Media Splintering
Alright, well, since Twitter (which is kind of the current nexus point for social media) is trending downhill, it seems like as good a time as any to resurrect this thing to some degree. That plus creating a literal half-dozen new social media accounts. Honestly I'm kind of terrible at social media, which shows pretty clearly, but this seems like a good time to just dunk my head into the lava and learn to swim with a trial by fire.
Given that everything has different functions and forms, I figure I might as well split myself up a bit instead of trying to cram everything into a format that doesn't work (or just not posting it if it seems like too much trouble). Tumblr, given that it's a literal blog website, seems like the best place for more thoughtful (or at least longer-winded) text posts, which is a good counterpoint to Twitter's off-the-cuff text blips. Youtube is going to be more of a nexus of three media styles: long-form content, which is shared with Twitch (directly in the case of the vod channel), more edited bite-sized content in the 10-40 minute range which is best-suited for Youtube itself, and then hyper-edited shorts which can be shared with Tiktok. Instagram has some overlap with Twitter as a place to share photos of things that I get that look cool, or events I go to if I ever get back out to PAX East or something.
Then we have the new ones. Mastodon and Cohost look like they're analogues for Twitter and Tumblr, respectively (or Cohost might if I could actually post on it). Vero (that thing everyone was jumping on years ago and forgot about immediately) seems like an Instagram-like. And Hypezone is... I'm honestly not sure. It seems like it's a weird crossbreed of Instagram and maybe Facebook/Twitter with Twitch integration? It's a bit of a mess so who knows. Anyway, all that to say that I guess to save myself some sanity I can do a bit of "content parity" across those locations, with videos getting split between Twitch/Youtube/Tiktok and similar post types going between Mastadon/Twitter and Cohost/Tumblr and such.
And of course the Bio.Site is there to link everything together so I don't have to remember every single link I have.
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"[...]
And even though you said today you felt better,
and it is so late in this poem, it is okay to be
clear,
to say, I don't feel good,
to ask you to tell me a story
about the sweet grass you planted -- and tell it
again
or again --
until I can smell its sweet smoke,
leave this thrashed field, and be smooth."
- From The Desire Field, Natalie Diaz
#poetry#poem#natalie diaz#anxiety#'let me call my anxiety desire then' is also an interesting line#tumblr's formatting is weird and I have long since given up
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A compilation of random and not so random things from Clavis’ route throughout the common route and true love route. This is not a detailed summary, but rather a series of things I found funny or interesting that later on turned serious as we got to the heavy stuff. And three times I yell at the new characters.
Take the information with a grain of salt because I’m still a learner, and used a translator + dictionary for most of the story, so some nuances may be lost
Spoilers and very long post ahead, ye be warned. Some backstory stuff is listed first
Another note, I switch between using Chevalier and Cheva a lot lol. I’m sorry.
Everything italicized is a sublist to an unitalicized point because Tumblr formatting is weird sometimes
CLALELOUUUUUUU
Such a charming, confident-looking gentleman that hides behind a smile but actually has a lot of insecurities.
The comedic timing in this route, holy shit
Take a shot every time his golden gaze with a hint of sensuality is mentioned, or he’s described as sexy in some way or another. Have a medic on standby.
I need an 色香 counter
But can you blame MC?
Clavis writes long-ass letters. And each ends with a little fact about himself. Some including:
Clavis doesn’t like food that looks or tastes ordinary
Princes are given territories. Clavis took one of Chevalier’s and developed it into his own.
He started learning medicine to show that he too could read medical books. Then one day, his mother caught a fever so he tried to make medicine based on what he read from a book. He realized that he can make people happy by making medicine. And then it turned into him using this skill to overcome his weak constitution and pull pranks
Clavis gets a fever if he stays up late, something touched upon in the story event of what the princes do when MC’s away, attending a friend’s wedding. The medicine allows him to push his body through these types of situations. Because the man’s always working.
Clavis is not of fully noble birth. Clavis’ mother, Letitia, was a maid from a lineage that served the Marquis de Michele family for generations. And so, Clavis’ fate was to do the same from the moment he was born.
His mother and Chevalier’s mother were close like sisters and had been together since they were children. Letitia was very loyal
Because of this relationship, no one knows how Clavis came to be. Sariel suspects that it wasn’t something she did willingly, but this was before the previous Belle had died and before the king lost his mind.
It’s revealed that in the both end clear chapter that his mother was raped by the king.
Clavis’ mother was always smiling, even if she wasn’t happy. She had loved Clavis very much but...
After Cheva’s mother died, Letitia threw herself off a cliff a few days later
Clavis says that if Chevalier wasn’t such a beast, adding on to the queen’s heartache, then the queen wouldn’t have died and Clavis’ mother would still be alive.
It’s after his mother’s death that Clavis is the way he is now.
By the way, every prince’s mother is dead...
Imagine Ikemen Prince if everyone’s mother loved their sons. And if their mothers were still alive.
Seven wonders of Clavis
Writes letters in code: actually his terrible handwriting. Sometimes even he has trouble reading what he wrote. BIG MOOD
Clavis has this secret room. Anyone that goes in doesn’t come out: It’s a room filled with weird shit and where he meets informants who tell him about activities from the surrounding kingdoms.
Parties that Clavis hosts filled with questionable people: anti-government people. You meet the “main” bad from both Cheva’s and Luke’s route. (Flandre and that guy that starts with a B in Luke’s route)
A gentleman that makes women cry. More on that soon
Whenever Clavis appears, there’s always an incident
Anyone who enters Clavis’ room gets amnesia
Clavis gets in a bad mood when it rains because of the rain-soaked roses, just like on the day of his mother’s funeral (revealed in the Both End Clear chapter)
A gentleman that makes women cry (the following is revealed in his true love route):
Clavis is a man that loves everyone and wants to be loved by everyone. However, he will only fall in love with one person
He had a bit of traumatic experience with love in the past, coming from how his mother killed herself the day after she told him she loved him
He thought he had all of his mother’s love. But he knew it wasn’t so after he found his mother at the cliff where she threw herself off of. His mother loved Chevalier’s mother more than she loved him.
He knows that women are attracted to him. Many have told him that they like him. But the more they proclaim that they love him, the more suspicious he gets.
And so he tests them, plays with them. Making the women who claim to love him run away
Clavis’ room hides his studious nature. It’s filled with well-used books on a variety of subjects including cooking, medicine, law, and economics. He doesn’t have a bed, but a couch.
Clavis has self-confidence issues when it comes to Chevalier. He’s an ordinary man while the 2nd prince is a genius.
As a child, he’d only receive praise and acknowledgement from his mother. He wanted others to recognize him as a real prince, but they were all always looking at Chevalier.
He’s never been able to beat Cheva in anything. In the true love route, Cheva says this is because Clavis never believed in himself
As children, bebe Cheva tells Clavis to do something that only Clavis can do instead of trying to do/beat him at things that Cheva can do if he wants to be acknowledged
Cheva would acknowledge him first if Clavis is able to do something Cheva can’t
Clavis is the type that’s willing to betray his country for the sake of a person/people. Where Chevalier will abandon a few lives, Clavis will save them. Where Chevalier protects the country, Clavis protects the people.
Chevalier is named king of Rhodolite. Clavis is named king of his own ‘Lelouch Kingdom’ that’s his territory.
If you want want Clavis to stop teasing you or doing whatever to you, tell him that you’ll hate him if he continues, and he’ll stop.
Clavis:
--------------------------------------
Cyril has red hair and his last name is Rose
MC’s second day in the palace is her being dragged around by Clavis and witnessing him pulling pranks on all of the brothers but Chevalier.
Yves and Licht pit count: 1
The food Clavis makes is questionable in color and appearance. It’s as awful as it looks. At least the first time. When referring to the food he made, a (?) is attached to emphasize the questionable nature.
Clavis and MC have breakfast daily (with breakfast made by Clavis). Occasionally the other princes are threatened invited to join, where MC can learn more about the princes as Belle.
Cheva’s the only one that hasn’t been invited
When Yves and Licht were invited, Yves brought breakfast that he made. Much to Licht’s relief. Licht gets force-fed cake by Clavis. Poor baby.
Leon actually enjoys the food and keeps stuffing his face.
Clavis drags MC with him to Cheva’s room to wake him up. Clavis’ method of waking Cheva up is drawing his sword and attacking him. But MC holds him back this time.
MC gets “kidnapped” by Clavis after lessons with Sariel.
Clavis: You’ll be saying “Clavis, I love you” after this.
MC: (There’s no way I’m going to say that)
Cut to Chevalier’s personal library
MC: Clavis, I love you!
They really just talk about the three new characters without dropping names in one scene huh
Clavis invites MC to a soiree he’s hosting. Licht and Yves tag along.
Clavis’s villa is weird. What is this architecture. Also looks haunted.
No seriously, what the hell is going on in the front.
It’s a dilapidated mess with booby traps until you go deeper in
Yves and Licht pit count: 2
HI SILVIO
OH? SILVIO’S FACE FEELS FAMILIAR TO MC?!?!?!? looks at Rio
“Silvio arrived by caravan”
Me: Romani dalmatian...
Silvio invites MC to a soiree he’s hosting at the Benitoite embassy
Cheva’s nickname for Silvio is jarajara? JINGLES? Silvio is Kommo-o
Clavis kissed MC’s forehead
HI GILBERT
Gilbert kowai
Cyril hiding in a chimney
Silvio tries to get MC drunk, but at her latest glass where she’s reached her limit, Clavis swoops in and snatches the glass, downing the drink
There’s talking with Silvio afterward, a carriage ride home, Clavis tucking MC into bed, and him leaving her room before we see the alcohol take effect
We get a reserved, insecure Clavis who keeps comparing himself to Chevalier
I WANT TO HOLD HIM
Sidenote: TW server mentioned acting along the lines of spoiled and affectionate when he gets drunk 🤔
Jade people are staying at the palace.
HI KEITH
tall like Jin and Luke
Has trouble sleeping and often wanders in the middle of the night
He’s having a tea party with Yves and Licht. Clavis appears
Y, L, K: SCATTER!
Clavis once fed Keith something weird
Clavis under suspicion for helping an Obsidian prisoner escape
Clavis is nowhere to be found. Cheva tells her where she can find him.
Meeting Gilbert in the ruins at Obsidian and Rhodolite territory.
Gilbert kowai x2
Clavis did free the Obsidian spy. Returned him to Gilbert in exchange for a key. Gilbert then kills the spy
The mansion at Clavis’ territory is clean and normal because it’s actually being maintained
Gotta love when a route has you question morality and if a character’s actions are right or wrong.
CLAVIS BOCCHAN
Clavis has been a disaster child since childhood
Date with Clavis in his territory!
Townspeople: SCATTER!
It’s like his birthday story all over again
Instead of punishing an Obsidian refugee boy who escaped the orphanage and stole from a bakery, Clavis has him work for the baker instead.
Clavis loves and remembers all of his people
People may be nervous around Clavis because he’s a walking disaster, but he’s a good lord to his people. You just can’t bring yourself to hate him.
30% of the people in his territory are Obsidian refugees
Sariel and Rio are at the mansion. There’s a document signed by all the other princes but Cheva charging him for kidnapping MC as well as helping a prisoner escape. Back to the capital we go, where Sariel questions MC
You can exchange books for information with Chevalier
Sariel begins to interrogate Clavis in the throne room with the same questions he asked MC, but Cheva interrupts and kicks Sariel out
Clavis and Cheva have a long talk about the things that Clavis is doing and how he’s a pawn in Gilbert’s game, and is going to end up getting himself killed. Before he leaves, Chevalier tells Clavis what MC said when she was questioned by Sariel
Breakfast with Leon and Nokto. Leon calls Clavis’ tart(?) cute and can tell that it’s a rabbit. Why rabbit? Because Clavis likes rabbits. Like MC
A knight rushes over and tells Clavis that a certain “place” is under “attack”. Clavis leaves breakfast to attend to it and the other princes are just chilling, Leon stuffing his face with food. Suddenly an explosion. Nothing out of the ordinary.
Apparently Sariel tried to break into Clavis’ room.
He tries to do it again, this time having MC keep watch and Rio act as a distraction
Sariel was the one that taught Clavis how to pick locks
Young Clavis threatened to tell other people about how he saw Sariel pick a lock unless he taught him how
Sariel wasn’t raised in nobility
Door opens, and the two see the inside of Clavis’ room.
MC comes back to her room after a bath and sees Clavis waiting for her. She tries to leave but he stops her. She has this guilty look and MC eventually confesses that she went into his room
Clavis was actually in her room to apologize for leaving during breakfast. He left her a clay figure, a Clavis substitute
As punishment for entering his room, Clavis gives MC a hickey
MC gets a lesson on the history of Belle selection and tragedy that was the previous Belle and king
This MC had the time to look over the contract and was not surprised when Sariel asked about the 99th clause
MC says she knows her position. But suddenly Clavis pops into her mid and she thinks about how she’s never going to fall in love with him
MC: (Wait a minute, what did I think about Clavis when there are 8 princes?)
Clavis takes MC to the southwestern border where a civil war has broken out. They’re crossing over to Obsidian because a refugee boy from Clavis’ territory begged him to save his family
CLAVIS IS A CUTE SLEEPER
Cyril was formerly an Obsidian soldier who couldn’t live with what he had done during the war 10 years ago where 1000 people from a Rhodolite village were to be burned. The 1000 people that Cheva sacrificed. Before that, Clavis came to the rescue. Well...he got captured first, and Cheva still didn’t budge. So the burning commenced. Cyril went to meet Clavis because he was curious and planned to die in the fire. Clavis freed himself and whatever survivors he could and Cyril joined him after hearing the prince’s convictions.
Onto the True Love route!
After finding themselves in an Obsidian prison, Clavis, Cyril, MC, and two guards that Clavis convinces to release them go and rescue 100 prisoners and they take an underground path leftover from an old fallen kingdom toward Rhodolite.
At the exit, Clavis and MC go to check it out and are greeted by Chevalier and an army
Cheva draws his sword and Clavis is frozen. MC steps in between them and Cheva points his sword at her throat. Clavis snaps out of it and pulls the blade away from MC with his hand
MC: (Don’t act like a gentleman at a time like this!)
Clavis scolds MC for trying to confront a beast like Chevalier
MC yells some sense into Clavis to get out of his lack of confidence funk
Cheva’s just standing there while Clavis is still holding onto the blade
MC continues her talk no jutsu and tells Clavis not to give up. Clavis starts to laugh and is out of his defeated state.
Cheva draws his sword out of Clavis’ grasp. Ouch. Clavis throws a smoke bomb and the two make their escape back into the tunnels. Cheva calls off the army. But stay alert
Back underground, they need to figure out food. They can’t get aid or find refuge from other countries. MC offhandedly suggests that Clavis establish his own country.
Clavis agrees to the absurd idea and establishes Lelouch Kingdom
Someone save Cyril from this absurdity
The refugees are for it.
Exiting the ruins, in the forest, Clavis points MC in the direction of his territory.
Clavis asks for a kiss goodbye and MC gives into his sad eyes. She pulls his ascot tie and kisses his cheek
In the city of the territory, MC asks for everyone’s attention to help their lord and tells them about the story of Lelouch Kingdom being established
MC then returns to the palace. She has to choose the next king the next day.
MC writes down two names: Chevalier and Clavis. Sariel asks her to explain (threateningly). She asks for a meeting with the two new kings.
The meeting’s to discuss granting Clavis’ territory independence as Lelouch Kingdom. Chevalier counters all of Clavis’ reasons, but Clavis knew that he wouldn’t be able to convince Chevalier with words
They’ll settle this with a duel. Someone help Sariel who can’t take more of this.
Oh my god the ground below gave in and they fell to the floor below.
After throwing a smoke bomb, Clavis lands a hit on Chevalier’s shoulder.
The two shake hands and Chevalier tells Clavis to prepare the necessary documents, with legible handwriting, and to set a meeting with Jade and Benitoite. He’ll surrender land to Clavis.
Clavis cries after Cheva leaves
(premium attire chapter 24) Shirtless Clavis
MC treating his injuries.
Clavis tells MC the various things he likes about her, kissing her in various places on her face in the process
Clavis starts to kiss her legs while trying to get MC to admit that she likes him
MC relents, grabs his collar, and kisses him
Clavis mentions that he’s a leg man, not a breasts man. I’m surprised this didn’t come up anywhere in the common route)
(end)
Before returning to her job at the bookstore, Clavis tried to keep her in Lelouch Kingdom by taking the yandere method of handcuffs, drugs, and nets until MC told him that she would hate him
At the bookstore
MC: (It’s a bit lonely, but it’s nice to have some peace and quiet
The door opens with the loud bell
Clavis: I missed you my lover! Now come and jump into my arms! (He says chest, but that sounds weird)
MC: (The peace didn’t last long!)
MC doesn’t give Clavis the welcome he was expecting so he says he’ll jump into her chest instead. *picks MC up*
It’s the day of Chevalier's coronation. Clavis drags MC off to the ball to show off their love
*squints* The dress that Clavis puts MC in sounds like the same dress Clavis had her wear for their engagement party in the fake wedding event. Or they’re just both coincidentally wisteria in color
*kisses MC while they dance* everyone is shocked
MC, embarrassed, tells Clavis that she doesn’t like PDA
Clavis: I wanted to show off our love, but now I can’t let anyone else see how cute you are
Drags MC to his room in the palace
Kisses and starts to strip MC out of her dress
Stops when she tells him to.
Even at this point, Clavis is still testing MC.
She asks what he’s testing her on. He gives her one of his shirts to wear because it’s going to be a long talk
refer to ‘A gentleman who makes women cry’
MC has learned to distinguish his laughs
MC decides to show her love more, catching Clavis by surprise every time
She tells him that she’s confident that she won’t break, so he can keep playing with her until he believes that she loves him the most. Other than PDA
A lot of tie pulling
Unnecessarily sexy act of removing his gloves
Lifts MC’s bare legs up and situates his body between them. Starts stroking her legs because the man loves them
Used to want to imprint his existence to everyone, but now is more interested in doing that with MC
MC asks him to do it gently, without the handcuffs, drugs, and other stuff
Ah, the wet sound of kissing
Epilogue
Clavis had a branch of the bookstore MC worked at in the capital open near his house in Lelouch Kingdom
He also has a room set up for MC at his place
He asks for a kiss on the cheek and MC complies, surprising him
Cyril makes his presence known, surprising MC
MC’s dere dere moments need to be cherished
MC doesn’t have to go back and forth between Lelouch Kingdom and the capital anymore. But what happens to Rio?
Clavis asks MC to wait in his room while he goes and carries out his duties. The door to his room opens easily, but instead, another trap waits for her that restrains her
As Clavis teases her, she notices that his body temperature is high. He takes some medicine. He got a fever from staying up late again
MC wants to be someone that Clavis can relax and be himself in front of
Cuddle time with Clavis. Vulnerable Clavis but doesn’t mean he’s still a little bastard
More wet sounds as Clavis teases MC in the morning
#ikemen prince#ikepri#ikepri jp#ikemen prince spoilers#ikepri spoilers#clavis lelouch#ikepri clavis#clavis lelouch route#ikepri summary
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Star-Crossed (Danny Wagner): Chapter Two
Two bands, both alike in dignity
At Lollapalooza where we lay our scene
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny
…… a pair of star cross’d lovers…...
Taglist: @flowervanfleet @weightofdreams-gvf @sierraahhhh @stardustschords @amourleger @ageofsewingmachine @theweightofstardust @gretavanhoney @samkiszkabreakmyback and potentially you, just lmk!!
(A/N): HEY LATE NIGHT READERS it’s been approximately 1.5 days since Chip Bunker so I hope you’re all still in a Danny mood. I’m sorry this chapter took so long, the press on nails I mentioned in the note for Acrylics have absolutely impeded my typing abilities… which is problematic in general given my profession.
BUT ANYWAY this will be the final pure-fluff chapter as we reach the midpoint of the story, the end of the act one if you will. I apologize if any of the formatting is off, I wrote this largely on my iPhone as I’m home visiting my mom this weekend. So if anything looks weird, blame tumblr mobile. Also this won’t be formally added to my master list until tomorrow night when I’m reunited with my laptop. now featured on the masterlist!
Ok let’s get this shit going!
********************************************
Chapter One
Chapter Two
DANNY POV
As I walked in the direction of the amphitheater, grinning like an idiot, I looked over the other notifications left by my bandmates on my phone. Lots of “where did you go?”s and “dude where the fuck are you we’re on soon”s. I sent out a text to Jake that I would be there in 5, since I knew if anyone he’d be the most annoyed with me right now.
But, God, I just couldn’t bring myself to feel sorry about it. Someone else could sound check my drums for all I fucking cared. With the way this girl made me feel, I wasn’t gonna leave her side a single second earlier than I had to.
I ran my fingers over my lips, still tingling from the sensation of hers. That kiss was something otherworldly, I had initiated it but I wasn’t ready for it to knock my socks off the way it did. It just felt so… Right. So correct. Like every person I’d kissed before today was leading up to her.
Leaving her was harder than I had expected, especially since I met her today and I was leaving her to go perform a headlining gig at a major music festival. This was a huge milestone for us, and yet my mind could not be less focused on the task at hand.
But then again, she’s coming to the show. I knew it would be impossible for me to find her in the crowd, but she sounded pretty genuine when she said she would go. I smiled to myself, thinking about her waiting for me after the show.
However, I was abruptly yanked out of my thoughts when I entered the amphitheater. Physically.
“Dude, finally, where the fuck were you all day? We’ve been trying like crazy to reach you!” Sam grabbed me by my shirt and pulled me down the hallway toward the dressing rooms.
All I could do was shrug, “Sorry, man. Time got away from me I guess. It’s a good thing I set that alarm for sound check though.”
“Yeah, and missed it, because you weren’t here! Jake’s about ready to kill you.” I rolled my eyes. Of course he was.
“Okay, well, I’m here now. We still have plenty of time before the show starts.” I said as we walked into the room where the twins were.
“He’s alive!” Josh wailed. Jake, on the other hand, briskly walked up to me with angry glare on his face.
“Where the hell have you been?”
I looked down at him and tried to hold back the smile that threatened to surface when I thought about where I had been all day. By the looks of it, if I smiled at Jake right now I might be going on stage with a shiner.
Instead, I looked around sheepishly, “I’ve been… you know, around. Seeing shows. Lost track of time.”
Josh squinted at me for a moment, then his face lit up. “Oh my God, you were with a girl weren’t you?”
This time I couldn’t resist cracking a small, all-telling smile and turning toward the rack with my show outfit on it.
“Holy shit he was!” Sam exclaimed. “Damn, all day?”
I chuckled to myself, “I mean, yeah, I did see most of the shows I saw today with the same girl… We might’ve kissed before I left but I mean-”
“You kissed her after knowing her for an afternoon?” Josh asked incredulously while I unbuttoned the shirt I had on and threw it onto the rack.
Sam let out a laugh, “Like you haven’t done more in less!”
I shook my head. “But like, it didn’t feel like it was just an afternoon. I-I don’t know how to explain it. We just kind of… connected, you know?”
Jake huffed in the corner, lighting a cigar. “Well, does she know you have obligations here too? You’re not just another festival-goer you actually have responsibilities.”
I rolled my eyes, buttoning up the shirt the stylist had picked for me as I turned to face the group again, “Jesus, Jake, I said I was sorry. I’m here in time, what more do you want from me?”
Again, Jake stepped closer to me, leaving a trail of cigar smoke from where he was sitting. He stops for a moment in front of me and says, “Commitment” before walking out the door.
I turned around to the other two Kiszkas, “Has he been like that all day?”
Sam shrugged, “Not all day, but we did get a little worried when you went all MIA on us. He was pretty freaked out before you showed up.”
“Look, I really am sorry I scared you guys, but I would never actually ditch something like this. I mean, come on! This is a huge deal!” I exclaimed, trying to bring back up the energy for this gig. Jake could be a sourpuss all he wanted on stage, I wasn’t gonna let him bring us all down.
Y/N POV
As James Bay started winding down, I decided to leave in search of the amphitheater. Surprisingly, the sea of venues was getting easier to navigate as the darkness of night settled in. Everything was lit up and music was pouring out from every which direction.
And yet, no signs of the amphitheater. Eventually, I stopped to ask a group of girls which way it was. “Oh, you’re going to see Greta too? Here, come with us we’re heading over too” One of the girls offered brightly. They seemed trustworthy enough so I agreed and followed along with them. On the walk over they gushed about boys named “Josh” and “Jake” but no mention of Danny. He had definitely said the amphitheater and Greta Van Fleet, but I suppose there had to be more members than just him.
Thankfully enough, they led me in the right direction and I found myself near the back of the pit in front of the stage. Nobody was out yet so I took the opportunity to light one of the joints I brought and prepare myself mentally for the possibility that his band fucking sucks and I have to see him again later.
My attention was refocused to the stage when the crowd suddenly erupted in applause and screams. There they were, four guys who looked to be around my age walking onto the stage one by one. I spotted Danny immediately, by far the tallest and bearing striking visual differences from the rest of the band. I was immediately taken aback by his hair- what was earlier tied up in a messy bun was now cascading down his shoulders. It was so much more than it looked when it was up. It was mystifying. He climbed behind the drum set and gave it a few testing strikes before leaning back into his seat as the rest of the band got their instruments ready.
I toyed with the joint in my mouth while taking in his stage presence. The plain navy button-down he was wearing with me has been exchanged with a more intricately patterned silk one. It coordinated well with the rest of the band’s outfits, but I couldn’t help but prefer the more relaxed and comfortable look. His skin looked almost luminescent in the spotlights, taking on a slightly lighter tone despite all the sun we had both gotten earlier today.
I was torn away from admiring him in the stage lights by a text. From….. Danny?
“Did u make it over? We’re about to start”
I knit my eyes in confusion and looked back up on the stage to see Danny putting his phone back into his pocket innocently, glancing at the other guys to see if they noticed. I chuckled to myself and responded,
“you did not just text me from ON STAGE U PSYCHO yes I’m here”
I looked back on stage and saw Danny jump ever so slightly at the vibration from his phone, eagerly reaching down to check it. It was endearing, really. Every damn thing about him was. I watched as he smiled at his phone, typed out a quick message and swiped it off.
A few moments later, my phone buzzed with his response,
“Good u can see me ;) Enjoy the show- meet me behind backstage area half hour after the set ok?”
I went to respond before my attention was snapped back up to the stage by a voice, “Are you ready?!” The one who I assumed to be the singer yelled into the mic. I recognized him as the curly haired boy sitting next to Danny at the fire the night before. The audience roared in response, making each of the guys on stage crack a small grin before launching head first into their opening song.
Thankfully, I had worried for nothing because his band was phenomenal. I didn’t even know any words and I found myself yelling and dancing along with the crowd to the music. Some of the songs were definitely more classic-rock style, but others were a bit folkier and slower, with the guitarist switching between electric and acoustic throughout the show.
Although I was wholeheartedly there for Danny, I couldn’t help but notice the stage presence of the other members. During the show I learned that they were brothers, and each of their names, but it was so intriguing to see how lost in their songs they were getting while performing them. They were playing like nobody was watching, letting the music move their faces and bodies in whichever way it commands. It was an inarguably authentic performance and I was happy for Danny that this was a group he got to be a part of.
However, it eventually came to an end, and I couldn’t help the twinge of guilt I felt for being excited that it was over. Only because now I get to go find Danny and tell him how much I loved it.
I made a wide loop around the audience area as people started to flood out, their set being one of the last of the night. By the time I got to the exit behind the backstage area, it had been about 20 minutes and I didn’t have to wait long to see Danny’s smiling face emerge from the doors. He closed the door quickly behind him, as if he were sneaking out, and then his arms were back around my waist the way they were before we parted ways. The way they snaked across my torso to fall to a rest at the small of my back made me consider if they were made to go there. Meant to. Destined.
“Hey you, what’d you think?”
I beamed up at him. “It was incredible. You guys are amazing. You’re amazing!”
Danny’s cheeks flushed slightly at the compliment. “I realized just before we started that I never mentioned what kind of music we do, I wasn’t sure if you’d be into it. Obviously a lot of people enjoy it but some people are really turned off by the sound, you know?”
I shook my head, eyes still wide with wonder staring up at him. I took a moment to reach up and brush the loose strands of hair out of his face as he looked back down at me. “No, no. The way you guys perform… you just really leave it all out there. It looks like you’re putting everything you’ve got into your performance. Anyone who truly appreciates music should appreciate your… you know, celebration of it, almost.”
It was at this point Danny’s lips started to curl upwards into a smile and I found myself tripping over my words, distracted by his mouth. I reached my hand up to fiddle with the buttons of his shirt- back to the one he was wearing earlier- before smiling back up at him. “And don’t worry, it’s safe to say your music did not turn me off.”
Danny chuckled, leaning in a bit to press his forehead back against mine. “Oh yeah? So one could even say it…turned you on?” his voice lowered to a gravelly murmur for the last part of the sentence.
This time it was my turn to flush pink. But I couldn’t lose my confidence now. My hands glided up his chest from the button I was fidgeting with, until they rested at his neck. I leaned in to ghost my lips over his before whispering, “Watching you sure did.”
That was all the reassurance he needed to lunge forward and reconnect our lips. Just like before, the contact started a frenzy under my skin, warming me up and making it feel like I was floating. This time, however, the kiss was turning more and more passionate. His tongue found its way into my mouth to greet mine and the two danced together between our teeth as we desperately tried to pull each other closer.
After a few minutes, we pulled away to catch our breath. “Do you… Do you wanna go somewhere? I know a trail around here that leads to a creek. I’m sure it’s empty by now. I just know the rest of the band’s gonna be out any minute and…” he turns to look back at the door as he takes a moment to articulate his thoughts. “… Quite frankly I want you all to myself tonight.”
My stomach fluttered at his words and all I could do was nod at him in confirmation. He grins at me and takes my hand, still feeling a little jolt when he did. However, just after we started walking, the back door opened once again, making us both turn around at the sound. And just like Danny predicted, one of his bandmates emerged. The one from the fire. Josh, I think. He was able to spot us about 50 feet away and a slow grin spread across his face. “Well if it isn’t Romeo and Juliet themselves. Have fun you two.”
Danny rolled his eyes and turned back around, pulling me with him. “Good night Josh” he said with a slightly annoyed tone.
“And good night Danny!” Josh yelled back in a much more suggestive tone, I could basically hear him wiggling his eyebrows.
We kept walking further away and from the distance I could hear the door opening again and voices, but Danny didn’t turn back around so I didn’t either. “Your band seems nice.” I offered.
Danny sighed, running a hand through his hair. “They are, they really are. But sometimes they can be a lot.” I nodded in agreement, unaware of what he’s referring to but trying to be supportive.
DANNY POV
I already knew I was gonna be in for it tomorrow from the guys for ditching them again tonight, but fuck if I cared. Hearing her gush over our performance and seeing her once more under the glow of the moon had me feeling like the band was the least of my worries. Because I might actually be falling in love with this girl.
I shivered slightly at the concept. We were just coming up on the 24-hour mark of our first meeting. If you could even call it that. Our little stare-off. But I genuinely feel like I’ve known this girl forever. Conversation flows so easily and my heart feels like it might just stop entirely whenever she smiles at me. Every logical component of my brain was screaming to run, to go back to my friends and avoid heartbreak once this festival ends and we start touring again.
I pushed those thoughts out of my mind as we approached the trail. It looked much darker compared to where we were standing, the lights from the festival illuminating the night.
I stopped and turned to look at her. “This is it.”
She looked into the darkness of the trail and then back at me. “You’re not taking me into the woods to kill me, are you?”
I couldn’t help but laugh and she smiled a bit too. “No, I promise it’ll be worth it. Besides if I wanted to kill you, you’d be dead already.” I added matter-of-factly.
She giggled and took my hand, and I felt my heart soar. “Well, I guess I should consider myself lucky, then. C’mon.”
She took a few steps into the trail and turned around to pull me in with her. “Not getting nervous are you?” She teased.
“Me? Nervous? Around you? Oh, never.” I joked as I walked into the trail with her.
We kept walking for a minute before she turned to look up at me with a smile, “So I make you nervous then?”
I let out a sigh, taking a moment to figure out how to word my next sentence. “The way you make me feel sure does.”
I watched as she smiled to herself, looking down at the trail we were walking on. “You don’t make me feel nervous. Usually I am around guys, but I don’t know. When I’m around you it feels like that’s where I’m supposed to be, you know?”
I did. I really did. All I could do was nod as a million thoughts raced through my head.
Soon we approached the clearing with the creek and thankfully, like I had hoped, it was void of people. I led her over to the edge and she reached a hand down to feel the water, the beautiful smile on her face growing as the sensation hit her. She immediately sat down and started taking off her shoes and socks before dipping her feet into the water with a sigh.
She looked back up at me, eyes sparkling like diamonds in the moonlight, “Well what are you waiting for? Are you telling me your feet don’t hurt after walking around all day?”
At that moment I felt the weight of the day rest onto the soles of my feet. She was right. Of course she was right. I followed suit and took my spot next to her, right hand resting on her left as we propped ourselves up. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her look down and smile at the feeling, and I couldn’t help but smile too.
We sat in silence for a few minutes, listening to the running water and basking in each others presence. She leaned over to rest her head on my shoulder and I moved my hand from its place on top of hers to sling my arm around her shoulder. I closed my eyes and prayed to any god that would listen that this moment would never end.
However, it did when she let out a sudden gasp and sat back up. “Oh my God, I just remembered. I have something to make this moment perfect.”
It already felt pretty perfect to me, that is until I watched her pull a joint and a lighter out of her pocket, sparking the lighter playfully to illuminate the mischievous look on her face.
“Oh you just get better and better, don’t you?”
Y/N POV
We sat there on the riverbed, passing my brothers joint back and forth. At one point he made a point to blow the smoke right at me and I tried moving around to catch the smoke in my mouth, which made him laugh. God, his laugh is beautiful.
However, after learning my intentions, he took a long drag from the joint before leaning in close to me, opening his mouth to show me the smoke sitting right on his tongue. It was an invitation. A dare, almost. Come and get it.
And I did just that. I planted my open mouth on his and felt him push the hot smoke into my mouth, down my windpipe and deep into my lungs, before nibbling on my bottom lip. Joint forgotten, I blew the smoke out of my nose and reached my arms up to pull him closer into another deep kiss. We sat there for a bit, under the watchful eye of the moon and nobody else’s, making out on the edge of the creek. His lips made their way down to my jawline, peppering wet kisses across before diving down to my neck, leaving harsh nips that I would definitely have to explain the results of to my brothers tomorrow.
My eyes finally fluttered open when I leaned forward, placing my hand next to Danny’s to support myself. But I felt my fingers brush against something and knock it into the creek. My eyes opened in search of the object and they widened when I realized what it was.
“Oh no.” I whispered.
Danny immediately pulled his head up from the crook of my neck, resting his chin on my shoulder. “What is it?” He whispered back.
“The joint.” I respond, with a small smile as I pointed to the last third of the joint floating down the creek away from us.
When Danny realized what had pulled me out of the moment, he tried to stifle a laugh. But then I turned to meet his eyes, and suddenly we were both leaning into each other roaring with weed-induced laughter. The once still silence of the night being filled by our fits of hysterics.
Once we’d calmed down, Danny threw his arm back around my shoulder and leaned back, pulling both of us flush onto the bedrock. I nuzzled my head into Danny’s shoulder and he pulled me closer to him, so that my head lay on his chest instead of his arm.
“Danny, do you believe in soulmates?”
If I had a clearer mind, I would’ve shot myself point blank for asking that question to a man I met a day ago. And yet, Danny turned to look deep into my eyes, before answering with a sigh, “You know what? I’m sure as hell starting to.”
I smiled back up at him and he pressed a tender kiss onto my forehead before we both turned back up to look at the stars.
I don’t even know when we fell asleep, or who did first, all I know is the sun is bright as fuck at 7am when you’re sleeping on a rock by a creek. I winced as the shade from the tree above us finally gave out and the sun started shining directly onto my face.
I opened my eyes to see Danny’s face inches from mine, breath fanning across my cheeks as he somehow continued to sleep. I leaned in and pressed a soft kiss onto his lips, causing his eyes to flutter open. My stomach erupted into butterflies as he smiled warmly at me, like he would be content waking up that way forever. Then, I watched as he slowly regathered his surroundings. “Oh shit we fell asleep out here!”
I couldn’t help but laugh, burying my face into his chest as he looked around at the handful of people on our once-private creek. He placed a hand on the back of my head, stroking my hair gently before mumbling, “We should probably head back then.”
I groaned into his chest, which made him chuckle, before leaning up to a seated position again, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. “Yeah, probably. My brothers are gonna fucking end my life for not making it back last night.”
I stood up and reached my arms down for Danny’s, hoisting him to his feet when he obliged. He let one of his hands fall away while the other stayed firmly put in my hand. We walked in peaceful, content silence back out of the trail and toward the campground.
“Will I see you again later?” He asked hopefully.
I couldn’t help the grin spreading across my face as I swung our hands a bit. “Of course. I have my brothers’ set this afternoon, but I’ll come find you after.”
We approached a site with two tents and a picnic table being taken up by a boy in sunglasses with his hair tied up. Danny threw him a wave, “Morning Jake!” He didn’t look up from his book and instead raised a middle finger toward us.
I chuckled and Danny sighed, “Always the charmer.”
He turned back to me, “Alright, well I’ll see you later then. And if your brothers give you a hard time make sure they remember they’re without a stage crew if they kill you.”
I threw my head back laughing, missing Jake’s ears perking up and him closing his book, peering over at me over his sunglasses.
Danny leaned in for a parting kiss and I felt the warmth re-enter my body, flooding my system again with something unmistakably Danny. I couldn’t help the sigh that fell from my lips as he pulled away. He smirked at me, “Never gets old.” Before turning and disappearing into the tent.
I bit my lip to hide the smile forming on my face as I turned around to head back to my brothers tent, already dreading the idea of explaining my night to them. I was pulled out of my trance by someone clearing their throat.
I turned to see Jake standing up at the table he was sitting at, sunglasses noticeably absent as his eyes were burning daggers into me. I was taken aback a bit, seeing as I had barely just met him. I tried to shake it off and be friendly.
“Hey, I’m Y/N. You’re Jake, right? You guys were great last night.” I took a few steps closer, extending a hand toward him.
He looked down at my hand in disgust, crossing his arms over his chest before staring deep into my eyes.
And suddenly I remember.
The rude long haired boys from the first night.
I was looking one of them right in the eye. And it was Danny’s bandmate.
I hesitantly pulled my hand back, brushing it against my jeans as the smile faded from my face. “I, uh… I think I should go.”
Jake squinted at me. “I think you should.”
I turned and walked briskly away from the campground, suddenly more eager than ever to reach my brothers.
CHAPTER THREE COMING SOON
#yeah so Jake is Tybalt#danny wagner#jake kiszka#josh kiszka#sam kiszka#danny wagner fluff#danny wagner x y/n#danny wagner x reader#danny Wagner fanfiction
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Starker Smut: Perks and Quirks of Being Tony Stark's Bestie
Based off this ask sent by @starkeristheendgame :
Are you even friends if you don't try to out-cum each other? (Could also be out-fuck)
Ty for sending that ask! It really got me inspired and motivated to write (which hasn't happened in so long so 😭💗) I feel like this fic is a bit odd but 🤷🤷 also, if the formatting's weird, sorry 😭 Tumblr fighting me on this
Notes: College AU, same age Starker, porn watching (some straight porn then gay porn), handjob, friends with benefits? Friends to lovers? (I also like to think Oblivious Idiots in love 😅)
WC: 3674 (AO3)
💗💗💗
There are certainly perks to being Tony Stark's best friend. Peter knows it well but he's never taken advantage.
It's always been Tony that pushes him into accepting things or just drags him along for the ride. It'd been that way since they met in high school and while Peter got into MIT on his own merit, he never would've been able to afford the cozy two bedroom apartment five minutes away from campus on his own.
"As if I'd let my best friend stay in the dorms," Tony had scoffed with a roll of his eyes, "You'd think you'd know better by now, Petey baby. You're stuck with me so just shut up and say yes."
There are certainly perks but then there's… other stuff. Tony's been called the genius of their generation but he also has a few weird quirks that Peter's not sure anyone else would understand. Or at least there'd be a few raised eyebrows if they knew.
When Peter walks into their apartment, he expects Tony to be furiously working on something in the kitchen or living room. If he's in the kitchen, whatever he's working on would definitely not be food.When Peter walks into their apartment, he expects Tony to be furiously working on something in the kitchen or living room. If he's in the kitchen, whatever he's working on would definitely not be food.
He's not in either of the rooms so Peter pads over to Tony's bedroom. The door's unlocked and Peter unsuspectingly walks in.
As expected, he finds Tony there and the other boy is sitting on his bed. Given the heat, it's not surprising that he's wearing a white tank top but little else. His pants are in a crumpled mess on the floor which leaves him in just his boxers.
This is where most people would jump back or run away because Tony isn't just lazing around in bed. Nope, Tony has his headphones in and he's lazily jerking off, eyes fixed on the laptop screen in front of him.
Peter's attention is caught by the slow, captivating strokes his friend makes as he plays with himself. It's only natural that that's where Peter's eyes go. The way Tony touches himself is almost hypnotic. His cock is flushed pink and Peter can see that swollen tip poke out whenever the other boy strokes downwards, squeezing along the length until he reaches the base.
Peter enjoys the view because Tony makes an attractive sight. Neither of them are really into sports but Tony's body is still solid with hard earned muscles. While Peter has his hyped up metabolism to thank for his lean body, Tony's probably earned his from all the hands-on work he does fixing cars and engineering.
Watching Tony like this… It has to be a pavlovian response because this isn't anything new. It's actually become a habit, someone walking in on the other and casually inviting the intruder for a jerk off porn session. Once he sees what Tony's doing, his own body quickly heats up in anticipation.
Peter huffs and leans against the doorway, angling his body to hide the evidence away. His arms cross over his chest and he feels his heart beating in excitement.
"Do you have any decency?" Peter quips, voice pitched loud enough to get Tony's attention. "Should I come back later?"
The other boy pauses and pulls off one of his headphones. Instead of being embarrassed like a normal human being, he grins at Peter. He looks happy to see him which probably isn't the normal response someone should have when their jerkoff session gets interrupted.
"Hey, Peter," Tony says and gives his cock a few slow tugs while he talks. "How was class?"
He lets go of his cock and gives a nice, slow stretch as though he'd been in that position for a while. It bobs in the air, slick with lube and still achingly hard. Peter sympathizes because his own cock has taken an interest and it's now straining against his pants.
Peter then notices the wad of tissues in the small trash can by the bed and his nose wrinkles.
"It was alright," he answers. "How many times did you do it already?"
Tony follows his gaze and it's only then that he ruefully smiles at Peter.
"Do it? You mean, come?" He laughs a little, "You're so weird, Peter. Can't even say come?"
Peter blushes but doesn't back down.
"You're the one jerking off in front of me," he retaliates. "If it's more than five, I'm leaving."
"No, no, don't go," Tony protests. "It was, hmm, twice?" He
shrugs, "You can still catch up."
Twice. Tony has already jerked off two times. There's no rule that they have to wait for each other to start but Peter considers saying there should be.
"I have homework," Peter hedges, a clumsy excuse because when do they not have homework?
Tony rolls his eyes and pats the space next to him.
"All the better to get it all out of your system. C'mon, sit down already," he says in an attempt to convince Peter. "Besides, I want your opinion on this vid."
Peter pretends to consider it for a second but he's never needed much convincing. It's as he thought earlier, there are certainly perks to being Tony's best friend but then there's this… thing they have going on.
Peter doesn't know what to classify it because it's not like they have sex with each other and they're definitely not dating.
Tony's just like this, so carefree, curious, and wild. The older boy shows no hesitation when it comes to talking about porn or sex with Peter. It might just be Peter, though, because he's never caught Tony doing it with anyone else. Maybe mildly flirting but then, that's just Tony's personality. He likes to joke around, likes to flirt, and apparently likes to watch porn with Peter.
Maybe Peter's the only one that isn't weird about this, about watching porn with a friend. He kind of likes that idea, that he's the only friend Tony does this with.
"Okay, fine, fine," Peter says as he unbuttons his pants.
Tony smirks at him once he sees how hard he is but Peter just rolls his eyes. What does Tony expect, really? It's pointless to try to hide it now. He does, however, nearly fold his pants and sets them aside because May taught him better.
He moves closer and Tony scoots over to give him space. There's ample room on the bed, Tony has a king for some reason, but since they're watching the porno on Tony's laptop, Peter remains close enough that their knees touch.
"Ready?" Tony asks but he immediately tugs the plugged headphones out. The telltale sounds of an adult film immediately spills into the room. High pitched moans and the dirty wet sounds of a mouth sucking on a cock.
Tony's been on an oral fixation lately. The last two videos they've watched were blowjobs. They never really watch the same video twice because that defeats the purpose of Peter being there to critique it.
He settles down in his spot, his left knee and elbow brushing Tony's while his right forearm rests on his thigh. His hand barely brushes against the bulge his erection makes in his boxers.
"I'll give you a head start," Tony says to which Peter shushes him.
The video that Tony's picked out today has a woman on her knees. She's working on her partner's cock, stroking whatever part of it that isn't in her mouth. Drool drips down her chin and her red lipstick is smeared on her face as she sucks her partner off.
It's not exactly Peter's taste but he can tell the woman is Tony's type. Curly honey brown hair cut short to her shoulders. She reminds him of a girl next door type of person, someone he could bump into on the street and never realize she does these kinds of videos.
He almost startles when he feels Tony nudge the bottle of lube against his arm.
"Thanks," Peter says absentmindedly as he takes it. He's watching the video and his body is slowly starting to heat up.
He only knows Tony's returned to jerking off because he feels the other boy's elbow bump against him. A glance to his side confirms it but when he looks up, a shock of heat sears through his body when their eyes meet.
Tony doesn't look away so Peter has to. Heat blooms across his cheeks and crawls down his neck. He's always had a hard time looking Tony in the eye while they're doing this. The other boy's gaze is just always so intense like the subject to be investigated isn't the video but Peter.
It's a silly thought though.
"She's not as loud as the last one," Peter says to offset the awkwardness. His voice is calm and collected but inside, he's shivering from the memory of Tony's eyes on him.
Peter squeezes his cock through his boxers. He's already so
hard that just touching himself like this has him trembling in pleasure. Without looking at his friend, he takes himself out.
"Yeah," Tony agrees. He already sounds breathless and Peter dares to take a peek at him again. "It was a little distracting last time, all that moaning sounded really fake so I thought this might be better."
Fortunately or unfortunately, Tony isn't looking at him this time. He's back to watching the screen, his hand curled around his erection and giving it the same slow teasing strokes as before. Maybe he's pacing himself since Peter still has to catch up.
Peter hums in agreement and forces his eyes back to the video. It doesn't really keep his attention though and his mind wanders, eyes glazing over as he focuses more on the sounds filling the room. His mind seems more in tune with what's happening around him though and he zeros in on the sound of Tony's breathing as it turns into soft panting.
His own breathing escalates to match his friend's and Peter jerks himself off to the sound of Tony's breathless panting, to the wet sound of flesh sliding against flesh next to him.
He lets out a moan himself. It feels good to touch himself after a long day of classes and with Tony next to him, it feels even better.
A sharp inhale next to him has Peter's back straightening as he looks at Tony who's biting down on his lip while watching the screen. Tony's eyes flicker to him and his white teeth press down on his bottom lip.
"You better not come," Peter grits out even as he's holding back from releasing. "You– ah– You said you'd let me catch up."
"Yeah, I won't," Tony grunts, "don't take too long though, I've been holding back for a while now."
"Literally no one told you to," Peter says. His voice has lowered into a strained, breathy murmur. "I'm almost there so just– just wait, okay? You're distracting me."
Tony rolls his eyes but ends up chuckling breathlessly. He stops stroking but starts massaging his balls. He lets out a moan as soon as he starts and that has Peter squeezing his eyes shut, his hips stuttering as he fucks his cock into his fist. His heart is going crazy and he stops fighting it. He spills right there, his load coming out hard and fast. It ends up getting over his stomach and he milks it out, squeezing the tip of the last few drops.
When Peter finally finished, his nose wrinkles at the mess.
"Should've taken your shirt off," Tony says, voice strained. Peter shoots him a friendly glare which softens when he finds that his friend is still holding back.
Tony's face is flushed, his eyes bright with desperation. And yet, he hasn't come even when it's obvious he's ready to pop off.
On the screen, the video is still playing but Tony grimaces.
"Let's switch it up," he says while absentmindedly fondling his balls.
"Sure."
Tony leans forward a bit and uses the touchpad on his laptop to search around.
Peter's trying his hardest not to stare at the other boy's erection. It doesn't soften in the least and Peter just wants to reach out and touch it. He wants to feel the warmth of Tony's skin, wants to hear what kind of noises Tony will make if he dares to do it. To touch Tony…
"Okay, this'll be a little different," Tony says when he leans back into position. "But I don't think you'll mind. Tell me if you do and I'll find something else."
A new video starts and Peter glances at it without much interest. Then he almost does a double take when he sees it's two men on the screen. Tony's never put in a gay porno before, he couldn't have chosen one now… Could he?
"A threesome?" Peter says curiously. His heart is pounding and then it goes into overdrive when the two men start making out.
"I can look for one next time if you want?" Tony offers.
When Peter looks at him, the other boy has a lazy smirk. He's not bothered at all by the two men kissing on screen and Peter swallows down the spit in his mouth.
"No, this is… this is good. It's fine," Peter says. He tears his eyes away and returns to the video.
"You're hard again," Tony comments nonchalantly.
Peter looks down and yeah…
Yeah, he's hard. He's watching a gay porno with his friend. Tony either picked up that this is more to Peter's preference or… Or this is Tony's preference, too. Either option makes Peter want to run away or hide under a blanket.
He does neither because he's not going to make this weird.
"You have good taste," Peter says, "They're both really hot."
Tony chuckles beside him.
"Damn right, I do."
They both fall silent and they're both more engrossed in this film. Peter actually takes the time to invest in what's going on.
Both men are attractive and hot as hell. They don't waste any time stripping each other off and the expanse of newly exposed skin has Peter squeezing his cock. Despite this, he can't help glancing at Tony. He can't help wondering.
Their eyes keep meeting and this time, Peter doesn't look away. Neither does Tony.
He greedily takes everything in, admiring the way Tony's hair, previously slicked back, is falling into his eyes. Tony's mouth is also slightly parted and a quick pink tongue flicks out to wet dry lips.
Peter wants to bite at them.
Something changes between them at this moment. They're watching both the film and each other. For Peter, his attention is clearly on Tony and it's Tony that's making his cock hard. But even if it feels like something's changed, Peter still toes the line of their friendship.
"Are you getting close again?" Tony pants. He's struggling not to come. Peter can tell by how he's gently tugging on his balls in an attempt to hold off.
Peter bites down on his lip cause he's not quite there yet but he wants to so badly. He wants to come with Tony watching him but he just can't seem to do it.
"I don't think I can," Peter groans. "Ugh, Tony, I'm getting tired…"
Something in his expression must give his frustration away because Tony shuffles closer which makes Peter's heart go berserk. Not only does Tony come closer but he moves behind Peter. His legs stretch out, bracketing Peter's body.
Suddenly, Tony's so much closer. Too close for comfort because Peter had just said he couldn't come but like this, it'd be so easy. It fuels all sorts of dirty imaginations that he shouldn't be having about his friend but...
"I got an idea," Tony says, pressed so close against Peter's back. Surely, he can feel Peter's heart thumping like crazy?
"What do you– Oh…!" Peter's entire body would've basically jumped in the air if it isn't for Tony's arms around him.
"It's not fun if I win all the time, so we should at least end this in a tie, right, Pete?" Tony says. "Lemme help, okay?"
Peter's wide-eyed and his hips buck uncontrollably when Tony's hand settles over his own. There's no mistaking what Tony wants to do. He shudders when Tony grips his cock. Those sturdy fingers that Peter often admires press down on him causing him to tighten his grip on his cock.
Tony's touching him… Tony's touching his cock. Tony wants to help jerk him off. Peter might just come right then and there.
"Tony– You're… touching me…" The words come out as an embarrassing squeak but Peter can scarcely believe it.
"Mhmm…" Tony murmurs, amusement in that one single hum.
Peter had just started the obvious so of course, he'd be amused. In any other circumstances, maybe Peter would be too. Instead, he feels like he's dreaming.
He's looking down at his body, specifically between his legs where Tony's tanned hand is curled around his.
"C'mon, Pete, either move your hand or I'll move it for you," Tony says right into his ear.
That gets Peter moving and he starts stroking again, clumsy with the added weight of another hand. It shouldn't feel good because their hands are bumping and Tony being pressed against him is making him so… so flustered.
But it does feel good. it feels so good that Peter's fighting tooth and nail not to come right away. He doesn't want this to end yet.
Eventually, Tony does take over. When he pulls Peter's hand off by the wrist, Peter just shudders and lets him. His hand falls to the side and he grabs the bed sheets just to have some sort of anchor. He squeaks when Tony adds more
lube.
"Sorry. Here, I'll make you feel good…" Tony promises him and he keeps true to his word.
He practices those smooth steady strokes on Peter's cock and Peter recognizes the motion. It turns him on so much, he's clenching his teeth to hold back all those embarrassing moans that want to escape.
"Tony…" Peter gasps. "I-It feels..."
"Too slow? Too soft?" Tony chuckles. "I got you, Pete. Relax and lemme take care of it."
Peter squeezes his eyes shut as Tony increases his pace. His grip tightens a little but it's enough to have Peter gasping out his name again. It's exactly what Peter needs and he whimpers, hips twitching toward the delicious friction Tony's hand provides. His ears burn from the wet sounds Tony's hand makes while he's jerking him off, all those embarrassing squelches and not to mention the feeling… Tony's grilling him just right, giving him a warm, wet hole to thrust his cock into…
How can something so simple as another person touching him feel so much better than his own hand? His hips continue to move, thrusting into his friend's tight grip. He's so aware of every point of contact between their bodies.
"Isn't this weird?" Peter starts to babble, "The porn was one thing but Tony– You're touching my– Isn't this too much?"
"Is it? I'm just trying to get you caught up," Tony says as though it's entirely reasonable. Then he chuckles and Peter shivers at the warmth of his breath fanning across his nape, "Are you even friends if you don't try to out-come each other?"
It's so ridiculous that it makes Peter huff out a laugh even while his cock is now a leaking mess in Tony's fist.
"You're ridiculous–" he gasps.
"And you're about to cum," Tony says. Peter can hear the triumph in his voice.
It's the last thought he has before Tony's hand squeezes him just right. He's coming before he even realizes it and the outpouring of pleasure has him arching his back, gasping and shuddering in ecstasy. Tony's arms keep him grounded, pressed as he is against the front of his friend's body.
"Oh, fuck, yeah," Tony breathes. His head hangs between his shoulders and it's in the perfect position to see how his load comes spilling out of his cockhead, all messy and being milked out by his friend in gentle squeezes.
He feels something hot and hard poke against his back. Oh, yeah… Tony still hasn't come.
Despite having his orgasm milked out of him, Peter's body is still hot. Actually, it's even worse now because Tony's arms are still around him. Tony's face is still buried against his neck, his breath adding fuel to the heat inside him with every puff of warm air against his sensitive skin.
The video has long since ended and Tony doesn't seem to care about putting another one on. It's just them now with no excuse for what they're doing.
Peter leans back and he can feel Tony's cock rub against him, so hot and demanding.
Tony grumbles when Peter pulls away but he doesn't get the chance to complain.
Peter shoves him so he's lying flat on his back, those familiar brown eyes wide with surprise and arousal.
"Since we're trying new things," Peter says, breathless and barely containing the urge to straddle Tony's hips. "Mind if I try something?"
Tony's hands curl into loose fists before they relax and he gives Peter a look that he's never seen before. Bedroom eyes… Now Peter understands what those words mean. By the curve of his smart mouth and the dark, hungry look in his eyes, he's inviting Peter to do whatever he wants with him.
"I'm always up for new things," he says then smirks, "Quite literally this time."
The amused look on Tony's face quickly fades when Peter settles between his legs. He leans down, takes a hold of the other boy's cock by the base to steady it. It twitches in his hand and Tony's eyes are fixated on Peter's lips hovering over his tip.
Peter loves the way Tony's watching him.
"I don't mind if you win this time, Tones," he says, "so don't hold back, okay?"
With that said, he closes the distance and takes Tony's cock into his mouth.
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Heyy I love your work so much, can I request shoji falling in love with y/n, ty
Maybe went a little overboard. Maybe. Also tumblr format go brrrrr
Despite it being so long ago, he remembers the day clearly. The day he first laid on eyes on you.
During his younger days, before UA, before middle school. Grade school. Despite being bigger than all the other children, he was shyest and quietest child in class. From an early age he was made acutely aware that he looked different, looked weird, and it hit his self esteem deeply. He would curl in on himself whenever he was called upon during class, he’d spend recess and lunch alone, his mood would sour whenever he heard his peers whispering amongst themselves when he would walk by.
It was only a matter of time before the whispers of him became more direct, and hurtful. Other students would crowd him, calling him cruel names. Freak, weirdo, ugly. Day after day it felt the same.
Until you showed up. He remembers the day like it was yesterday.
A new student had joined the class, you. He hadn’t been paying a whole lot of attention, assuming that you’d also treat him like an outsider. During lunch period, he was enduring the regular harassment the other students put him through.
As one of his bullies were about to open their mouth, their venomous words were quickly replaced with a shrill wail of pain and clutching the back of their head. Everyone, shoji included, looked to see what had hit the bully’s head.
There stood you, several rocks levitating next to you, an angry look on your young face.
Shoji couldn’t do anything but stand like a deer in headlights, watching as you told the bullies off and when they tried to gang up on you, the rocks floating beside you launched at the bullies. The rocks slammed into them roughly, bouncing off after impact, causing them to yell and run away.
Shoji blinked as you walked up to him, the face that held such determination only a moment ago melting off and being replaced with a kind, genuine smile. You reached your hand out to him, your smile not once wavering.
“Hi,” you said sweetly. “My name is y/n. Who are you?” It took a minute of shoji looking between you and your hand before he took your hand in his.
“I..I’m Shoji. Shoji Mezo.”
“Nice to meet you Shoji. Are you okay?”
You looked over at one of his arms, which had a couple bruises. Shoji looked at his arm, then shrugged. “Nothing I’m not used to.”
Your smile dimmed just a little bit, but you were quick to regain it. “Well, I’m gonna have to change that. Do you wanna walk home together?”
Believe me, Shoji did want to walk home with you. However, he still felt wary. Yes, you had just defended him from his bullies, but he just met you.
“Or not, it’s okay! You don’t have to! I just thought, you know..I could try making friends.” You looked down at your feet and kicked one of the rocks, no longer affected by your quirk.
“You..wanna be my friend?” Despite the nagging voice in the back of his mind, the voice that said it was some kind of mean joke, he wanted to know. He wanted to walk home with you, he wanted to be your friend. The look you gave him almost made him giggle.
“Yeah! I wanna be your friend, you look cool!”
Cool. Now there’s a word Shoji hasn’t been referred to before. Shoji mulled it over in his mind, his dark eyes locked in a state with your hopeful eyes. He looked down at his shoes, and shrugged.
“..okay. Yes, we can walk together.”
“Really?! Yay!” You jumped, actually jumped, and grabbed his hand and started walking. You kind of dragged Shoji behind you while you walked ahead of him, but it didn’t take long before he caught up with you. You had started talking about something, Shoji didn’t really know what though; he was looking at your face. Memorizing the details, how your face was kind and how your mouth was moving a mile a minute as you went on and on about some random topic. For the first time in a long time, Shoji felt like he had a friend.
Cut to present, third year in UA. You and Shoji had been attached to each other by the hip since your first day, you both wanting to be heroes. When you found out you’d be going to the same school, you both spent the day celebrating.
Unfortunately, you were in different classes. You in 1B and Shoji in 1A. That didn’t hinder your guys’ friendship in the slightest, thank goodness.
Whenever you’d walk by each other in the hall or make eye contact in the mess hall, or during training when your classes were either training together or were just getting into the gym, you’d smile and greet each other.
His mood would always light up when he saw you, looking at him with a toothy grin and wildly having your hand, trying to get his attention when you already had it.
After school, you’d always visit his dorm, or he’d visit yours.
“Sorry about Monoma, Moji. His head is so far up his own ass some days I swear-“
Moji. A nickname you had given him in middle school. ‘Well, it sounds cute!’ you had insisted when he said it sounded almost exactly like his regular name. He still smiles to himself about it, knowing that you wanted to give him a nickname that was ‘cute’.
When he realized it, you honestly weren’t doing anything in particular.
You both were just relaxing in your dorm, watching a scary movie (upon your insistence), and it was a lot scarier than you had both anticipated.
As the music tensed and you both could feel the oncoming jumps scare, you yelped and grabbed onto him, huddling into his side and hiding your face in his chest. While the piano sailed on the screen, his attention was only on you.
Shoji knew you felt comfortable, even safe, around him. You’d known each other since you were both little, he’d hope that you felt good in his company. But when you wrapped your arms around him, afraid and seeking safety and protection from the movie that couldn’t hurt you at all, throwing your arms around him in an attempt to ease your fear, he felt his heart skip a beat.
He made you feel safe. And boy, it felt great. He wanted to keep you safe, make sure that you were okay and happy. Without a word he brought you closer to him, wrapping you in his arms as the movie played on. He could feel his face warming as you pushed yourself deeper into his chest, not yet ready to look at the screen. He placed his chin on your head and rubbed your back, trying to soothe you.
“Is it over?” You murmured, voice muffled against his body. Shoji nodded, not moving his head off from yours, nor making any moves to let you go.
This, holding you in his arms as he comforted you, made him feel...fuzzy.
Fuzzy, it was a weird sensation. A feeling where he felt like his body was on fire and his throat started tightening and his palms started to feel clammy. But at the same time he felt warm and happy, blissful, even. He liked having you this close to him. He liked holding you.
At the realization that he felt this way he almost dropped your ass.
Uh oh. Could this be?
Feelings???
Shoji looked down at you once again to see that you had relaxed against him, not moving to get away from him or tense. In fact, you had even sighed contently.
Oh yeah.
These were feelings, and he was in some pretty deep shit- er, feelings. Feelings? Yuck.
#bnha#boku no hero academia#mha#my hero academia#shoji#mezo shoji#mezou shouji#shouji mezou#mha shoji#mha shoji mezo#bnha shoji#bnha shoji mezo#shoji x reader#mezo shoji x reader#shoji mezo x reader#mha shoji x reader#shoji x y/n#x reader#x y/n
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