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lo-55 · 3 years

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Lightning In A Bottle Ch. 2

Nanohana wasn’t changed much, to the point that Nao was beginning to wonder how long she had been inside her crystal prison. She had no idea how much time had passed, but if the boy who had broken her out of the rock hadn’t recognized her or her flag it had to have been a while.

And that hat…

It had to be a duplicate, surely.

Nao tucked her hands into the pockets of her pants. Her high leather boots kept the sand out of her socks, at least, and when Luffy managed to burn whole sacks of Raindance powder her cape kept her dry. At her side, Odenta and Mikazuki hung as heavy comforts in their sheaths. They didn’t garner nearly as much attention in the city as Nao and the Gem’s had when they had arrived however long ago that was. Back there the city had emptied out as soon as they stepped foot in the sand covered streets of the Alabastan port.

No, no one even looked twice at them, there were so many people going through the city.

Not her, or Luffy in his hat.

How peculiar.

Nao made a mental note to get a hold of a newspaper as soon as she could, or maybe visit Ohara. They would have the best records about what she’d missed.

It would have to wait. Ohara was a long ways from Alabasta, and it would be hard to sail Blood Stone without someone else helping her. The ship was just a little felucca, hardly big enough for fifteen people, but she was tough as nails and made for the roughest waters in the world. All the same, it wasn’t safe to sail alone in the Grand Line, where the weather might change without warning, when there wasn’t someone to stay awake and keep watch. Not to mention Marine’s, other pirates, and all sorts of other dangers. Sea Kings probably hadn’t gone extinct since she went under. She’d rather not deal with them.

Nao was so busy contemplating her ship that she nearly walked right by the restaurant that Luffy went shooting into.

She had to backtrack to poke her head inside. A crowd had gathered, and Luffy was ignoring it entirely in face of ordering lunch. A pair of unconscious bodies lay through several broken walls.

Nao cocked her head. Had Luffy done that when hed stretched out and launched himself like a demented rubberband? She knew it had to be a Devil Fruit, but she didn’t expect him to go causing that much destruction mindlessly.

What a weird kid.

Ah well. Pirate.

Nao took a seat next to Luffy while the chef frantically started cooking. Whoever had been in before them had eaten a lot, with dirty plates stacked nearly to the ceiling. Now he was feeding Luffy, and her too.

Nao made a mental note to tip him well.

She casually elbowed Luffy’s face out of the way and stole a whole chicken to rip into.

“Hey!” he shouted around a mouthful of food. His head stretched unnaturally away on his neck. “That’s mine!”

“Finders keepers,” she said succinctly, and shoveled it into her face as fast as she could. Time hadn’t passed for her at all inside the stone. Her injuries from the battle weren’t healed, and she didn’t feel well rested. She was famished, but not starving like she’d spent months unconscious.

Nevertheless, she’d always been a big eater. She needed the energy to keep up with her lifestyle, and to keep herself strong enough to fight. She wouldn't let her broad shoulders shrivel or her powerful legs grow weak if she could help it. It was a death sentence.

She nearly bit Luffy’s hand inhaling spicy noodles next, and a hank of lamb. The chef was sweating and out of breath but he kept putting food on the counter and they kept eating. Luffy was chatting with the locals while he ate.

“Why’s there a hole in the wall? Is that some weird hobby of yours?”

“YOU’RE THE ONE WHO PUT THE HOLE IN THE WALL!”

She knew it.

Nao was in the middle of a plate of roasted peppers when one of the formerly-unconscious men climbed out of the hole in the wall. She watched him get slammed back down by a man in a fur coat, and the next thing she knew she was getting dragged through the streets of Nanohara by Luffy.

Why are we running? That guy isn’t even that strong...

“Tashigi!” the man chasing them shouted, “Stop them!”

Nao looked forwards to see a girl with a sword.

“I’ll handle her,” she offered Luffy, who nodded and let go so he could go bouncing up onto the rooftops like a ninja or something. In one smooth move Nao drew Odenta from her side and lifted it to block a blow from the other girl, Tashigi.

“Nice sword,” Nao grinned sharply at the girl over their locked blades. Her form was good, but she wasn’t very strong. Too bad.

“Yours is too. It’s a shame it’s being used by pirate scum!”

“Xeshishishi, tell you what, if you can beat me you can have her.”

The man who’d been smashed into the floor landed next to the two. An orange hat rested on his head and he had a bad slung over one shoulder. Black hair fell in soft waves to frame his cheeks, which were covered with freckles.

There was something familiar about him…

“Excuse me, ladies,” he said politely, startling both of them into looking away from their crossed blades to him instead. He tipped his hat towards them, then the building that Luffy had jumped up onto. He was blocked from it by their swords. “I have to catch up with my brother now.”

“Uh, sure,” said the marine girl. They pulled their blades away to make a path for him.

“Why are you telling us this…?” the redhead countered, looking confused. She faltered when she got a good look at his face, recognition shooting through her. Nao sucked in a breath. He looked like-

“Hey, hold on-!”

“Sorry, I can’t,” Portgas waved to them and shot over the rooftops, after his brother and the marine. Nao shook her head. She would see him again, if he was chasing Luffy.

Nao drew back and slashed again easily. Each move was economic and graceful. She spared no energy, partially because she simply didn’t have any. Tashigi blocked, but the force pushed her back a few feet.

Nao parried her next attack and side stepped to smack her on the back of the neck with Odenta, sending her careening to the ground.

Someone screamed, but no blood came from the fallen marine.

She touched the back of her neck in confusion. “Wha-?”

Nao didn’t answer.

She was already gone.

Nao ducked around a corner and ran after Luffy, following his Haki until she caught up with him and a group of colorful people. Hadn’t he said he was a pirate? Or he was going to be King of the Pirates. That was what he’d said. Well, to be king of them you needed to be a pirate in the first place, right?

That sounded right.

So these people were probably his crew.

When he saw her he grinned and threw his hand out. It stretched far enough to grab her by the wrist and yank her forwards.

“Hey! You made it past the sword lady!”

“Well yeah,” Nao landed beside him running. Her leg was starting to ache where a cut had caught her over the knee.

“Who are you supposed to be?” A curly haired young man with a long nose demanded, eying her.

“She’s a rock person I found,” Luffy said cheerfully.

“That. About sums it up,” Nao felt herself smile involuntarily. “I’m Roche Nao,” she said for the second time that day. She really hoped they stopped running soon. Her leg was seriously starting to ache.

“So Luffy picked up someone else weird,” an orange haired girl looked exasperated more than anything else. Nao felt like she should have been offended, but she just shrugged. She was too tired to be upset with people who hadn’t actually done anything to her.

Besides, she wasn’t wrong.

They came upon a pretty caraval, with a sweet looking figure head. A sheep. Nao felt herself smile. It was cute and light hearted, like this crew seemed to be. Nothing at all like the swift, devil faced Blood Stone. Her eyes were two carved rubies, and a pair of snakes twined around her in a macabre necklace that matched the one that hung beneath Nao’s own shirt.

“Permission to come aboard?” she asked Luffy lightly. The boy beamed at her and tipped the brim of his hat.

“Granted!”

They scampered onto the ship and in a whirlwind of motion they set sail. The caravel carried them away from the port. The pirate flag flapped in the wind, showing off a skull wearing a straw hat.

Seriously, what was up with that hat?

Had that up-and-coming volcano really given it to some upstart?

...actually. That sounded exactly like something he would do.

She realized that their little pet (a raccoon?) was staring at her only when he shouted suddenly.

“Ah! You’re bleeding!”

It was a testement to how tired she was that she hadn’t noticed that he was a mink, and not just a weird animal.

“Hah? Where?”

“Your leg! Quick, take off your pants and I’ll- ouch!”

The orange haired girl smacked him over the head. “Don’t ask it like that!” she scolded.

“But I need to see how bad it is! She might need a doctor!”

“You’re the doctor!”

Ah. Nao would have preferred they didn’t know she was actually injured, or weak, but there was nothing to be done about it. They seemed like good people anyhow, as far as pirates went.

“Well then, mister doctor, where’s your office?”

“A-ah! I don’t have a real office yet. We’ve been using the bathroom.”

“Then lead the way.”

The doctor, Tony Tony Chopper, guided her down to the bathroom. The Caravel was small without being cramped. Nao took off her boots and pants, now stained with blood, so he could clean and stitch her leg. He treated her smaller scrapes and bruises as well, and stuck bandaids across her cuts.

He left so she could clean herself properly, wash her hair and get the blood off of her. She watched the pink water wash down the drain and wondered where her crew was. What had happened to Elba, Talisa, Adrien and Pearl? Were Rize and Hinami still injured? Had the marine’s tended to their wounds? Tier had escaped into the sea before a blast from a marine flagship had sent them hurtling out of the little cove they’d been hiding in and beached their ship. Had she made it back to fishman island?

She needed to find out. She owed it to her crew after she had failed them all.

There was a knock on the door.

She cracked it open to find the blond man standing outside, holding a bundle of clothes in his arms. Her red hair dripped across her shoulders, but in a few minutes it would be dry and wildly curly again.

“I bought an extra outfit for Nami or Vivi, but now I see it was destiny that I have it ready for you!”

He had literal hearts in her eyes when he presented them to her.

Nao took them carefully. The clothes were lightweight and soft, so soft that they caught on the sword-callouses on her fingers.

“Thank you?” Her clothes weren’t ruined, by any means. Did she really need a new outfit?

“If you need any help changing I-”

She shut the door on his face. “Nope.”

They definitely didn’t recognize her. No one who did was stupid enough to flirt with her. Her dad would kill them.

Nao changed into the clothes and was disappointed to find that they were dancers clothes.

Yeah. No.

She couldn’t fight in that!

Instead she cleaned her pants as best as she could, used a small sewing kit she kept in her cape to fix the cut in them, and redressed.

She'll have to find a hair tie eventually.

When she came back up to deck the other man they’d run into was crouched on the outer rail. With his back partially to her while he chatted with someone else Nao caught a glimpse of a tattoo on his back.

It was familiar, too. He nodded to Nao when she came to stand beside the green haired man. Solo?

Most of his attention was on Luffy, not her.

“Luffy. Will you come join the Whitebeard Pirate Crew? With your friends, too, of course.”

Whitebeard pirates. Whitebeard. Edward Newgate.

Nao could feel a headache starting to throb behind her eyes.

“No way!”

The man laughed. “Just thought I'd ask! Whitebeard is the greatest pirate I've ever known. I want to make him the pirate king. Not you, Luffy.”

Nao internally winced. Brutal. They were obviously close. Childhood friends?

“That's okay! I'll just fight him.”

Nao blinked at Luffy’s back. Was he stupid? Or just crazy?

Either way, Nao liked him.

She couldn’t start her hunt for her crew yet. She didn’t know how long she was trapped, and she didn’t know where everyone had gone. She also wasn’t in any shape to go rushing off and finding out. Her mother would have killed her for doing something as impulsive as grabbing the nearest Marine and demanding to know where her crew had been taken. And her dad…

Her heart twisted in her chest. Nao shook her head. She wouldn't let herself have a breakdown yet. Not here. Not yet.

“Hey, Luffy.”

He turned his head to look at her. Nao offered him a half bow. “Sorry but, I’m going to have to take advantage of your hospitality for now. Until I can get in contact with my own crew.”

Luffy shot her cheerful grin. “Sure, okay. You can hang out with us for a while.”

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea,” the blue girl stepped forwards. Nao really needed to figure out everyone’s names. She only knew Luffy and Chopper. “We’re not here for tourism. Where we’ll be going is bound to be dangerous.”

Nao cocked her head. Yeah. “I appreciate you worrying. But I’m a pirate as much as anyone else. I won’t change my mind just because it’s dangerous.”

Besides, they were going to Yuba, where Nao was supposed to meet with her crew.

Molly should have already gotten there and set up shop.

“Wait for us, Moll. We’ll get there, even if it takes a while.”

Molly pursed her black-painted lips. “I don’t like it, captain. This splitting up stuff. You already sent Harry and Monty back to Zou. We’re stronger together.”

“I know we are. But with dad-”

“Don’t worry,” Nao looked the girl in the eye and lay her hand on Odenta’s hilt. “I won’t ask any of you to be responsible for me.”

“I am my own captain, after all.”

#one piece #One Piece Fanfiction #monkey d. luffy #original character #one piece strawhats #straw hat luffy #straw hat pirates

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rosieshipper · 3 years

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You are apart of this family

Summary: A while after Morgan is born, Rose begins to think that she’s not really apart of the family because she’s adopted, Tony tells her otherwise

Rose adored her younger sister. There was no denying in that. Morgan made Rose’s life a little brighter after she was born. She would gladly dote and fawn over her baby sister who brought so much joy to her when she needed it most. But after a while, when her parents, Tony and Pepper, began to spend more time and energy on Morgan, Rose was left alone. Not that she was ever complaining about it, she knew how hard it was to raise a baby for someone who has never had a baby before. She knew that her parents had to give their full attention to the infant. She knew all of that fully

But even so, Rose began to feel a bit lonely as the days soon turned into weeks. As each day went on, Rose went about her daily routine while Tony and Pepper were often too busy with Morgan to interact with her. At first it didn’t bother her, but as more time passed, Rose felt more and more lonely. Even at one point feeling jealous of Morgan. But she quickly shook those feelings away. She knew that having to take care of a baby was tough, so she shouldn’t have felt jealous of her getting all the attention. But still, it would have been nice if Rose would have at least gotten acknowledged every now and then

Another factor that came in when Rose was left alone was the fact that her overactive thoughts began to run rampant. In the beginning it was just small meaningless thoughts that Rose would simply brush off. But over time, they started to get worse. At one point, Rose was starting to convince herself that she didn’t really belong in this family because she was adopted. She wasn’t a real Stark. It got so bad to the point that even when Tony and Pepper had time to spend with Rose, she actively avoided them, not wanting them to see how upset she was

But to Tony, she wasn’t fooling anyone. He had picked up on her changed behavior several times. He noticed how she would be more reluctant when he or Pepper offered Morgan for her to hold. He noticed that she was a bit more irritable and aloof. There was even one point when he noticed how red and puffy her eyes were when she came from her room to eat dinner. Tony knew for sure that something was wrong with Rose and he intended to find out what

It was a late July afternoon. Rose was sitting down on the living room couch, watching some shows on the cooking channel. But a few minutes into her show, the sound of loud screaming and crying cut through the air, making Rose internally groan. Morgan was awake from her nap. She saw her father move out of the corner of her eye to go and get Morgan from her crib. Once he had her in his arms, Tony tried his best to comfort her but her loud screams just kept on up. It got to the point that Rose’s head was beginning to throb at the loud incessant noise

Eventually, Pepper came walking out of the kitchen and up to Rose. “Rosie, dear would you mind helping me with dinner real quick? I just need some help chopping up the potatoes and vegetables.” She asked as she looked down at her. Rose was quiet for a moment before letting out a quiet sigh under her breath. “Sure thing, mom.” She said with a nod before standing up and walking into the kitchen with Pepper. Rose walked up to the kitchen counter where a knife and the vegetables were waiting for her. Taking the knife, she began to chop away at the vegetables and potatoes

But a few minutes into her chopping, Tony came into the kitchen with a screaming Morgan in his arms. “Honey, have you seen Morgan’s bottle? I can’t get her to calm down and I’ve tried everything. I think she might be hungry.” He asked as he began to look around the kitchen. “Check the fridge, dear, I think I have a few in there.” Pepper said as she placed some chicken into the oven

With Pepper and Tony chatting away about how to calm Morgan down and Morgan’s constant screaming and crying, Rose began to feel her head throbbing again. It was all too much. Too much noise, too much commotion, too much everything. Rose didn’t even realize that she was chopping the vegetables faster and louder, the knife slamming against the cutting board loudly to try and block out the noise

It wasn’t until Rose felt the knife slice down on her thumb tip was she finally knocked out of her trance like state. “Ow! Damnit! Son of a bitch!” Rose suddenly cursed loudly, startling Tony and Pepper into silence as she cradled her now bleeding thumb. “Rosie, are you oka-“ Tony couldn’t even get through his question before Rose suddenly snapped at him. “I’m fine damnit! Just leave me alone!” She spat at her father who instantly frowned. “Hey! What’s gotten into you? Where’s this attitude coming from?” Tony asked her with a deep frown

Rose only rolled her eyes before glaring back at him. “Oh now you suddenly have concern for me. It’s not like I’ve been practically all by myself for the past month or so because you two are too busy with Morgan to even check and see if I’m ok.” She hissed, feeling tears welling up in her eyes but refusing to let them fall. “Rose, Morgan is just a baby, she needs a lot of our attention. Are you jealous of her or something?” Tony asked her seriously

“Yes..no..I don’t know! I just- agh!” Rose couldn’t control how she was feeling anymore, so she simply stormed out of the kitchen and out the front doors of the house. She ran as fast as she could away from the house and towards the lake. Once at the lakeside, Rose paced back and forth by the water, her chest heaving as she breathed heavily due to her anger. At one point she paused her pacing and looked at her reflection in the water. Frowning deeply at the sight of herself, she took her foot and slammed it down into her reflection, splashing water everywhere and getting rid of the image of her. After that, Rose began to feel her anger melt away into that of sadness as the tears she had tried so hard to hold back finally slipped down her cheeks as she sank to the ground, pulling her knees to her chest as she sobbed quietly

After what felt like hours, which in actuality was around 45 minutes, Rose heard quiet footsteps approaching from behind. She already knew who it was. It was Tony, and she was expecting him to come out there to yell at her for how she behaved inside. But as the footsteps soon stopped beside her, she heard the sound of Tony sitting down beside her. “Beautiful sunset, isn’t it?” Tony hummed as he looked out over the lake, the top of the sun poking out from above the horizon. Rose didn’t say anything at first, she just sniffed and rubbed her red puffy eyes. But eventually she spoke up, her voice hoarse from her sobs. “I guess so.” She croaked out

Rose then felt Tony’s eyes on her as she looked out over the lake. “Mind if I see your thumb? I brought a bandaid and some antiseptic wipes.” Tony asked softly as he looked over at his daughter. Rose didn’t say anything or move for a few moments before eventually holding her still bleeding thumb out to him, not saying a word. Tony took Rose’s hand gently and began to gingerly wipe away the blood from the cut with the wipes. Rose tried her best not to move or make any noise despite the wipes making her wound sting. Once the cut was cleaned, Tony took the bandaid and carefully wrapped it around her thumb. Once it was all wrapped up, Tony leaned down and pressed a kiss to her thumb before letting her hand go. “There, I kissed it better so it should be healed up in no time.” Tony mused, trying to cheer Rose up at least a little bit, but she still didn’t say anything or even look at him

Eventually Tony sighed and straightened up a bit. “Listen Rose, about what you said in the kitchen back there, I know adjusting to this new life is hard and you feel left out. But I want you to know that your mother and I both love you very much and we wouldn’t trade you for anything else in the world.” Tony explained softly to her. Rose just let out a quiet sigh and looked over at her father, tears in her eyes. “It’s not just that I feel left out, I feel like I don’t belong in this family. Morgan was born from you and mom, I was just adopted because my own father didn’t want me. I’ll never fit it because I’m not your real daughter.” She whimpered before beginning to sob heavily again

At that moment, Tony didn’t care about anything else. He immediately reached over and pulled his daughter into a tight hug. Rose didn’t even try to fight back, she just melted into his embrace, clinging to him as she sobbed heavily into his chest like she used to when she was a young child. Tony didn’t say anything for a little while, he just let her cry as he rubbed her back in a soothing manner. After a few minutes, Rose sobs eventually died down to quiet whimpers, at that point, Tony finally decided to speak up again

“Rosie, no matter what you think, you are our real daughter. Just because you’re adopted doesn’t mean that we love you any less of you were our biological daughter. Nothing will ever ever change that, you understand munchkin?” Tony explained softly to her, reaching up and wiping away her tears. Rose felt her heart flutter a little when she heard Tony call her the childish nickname he always called her. It felt like ages since she had last heard that name. Rose sniffed before nodding slowly. “I understand, Papa.” She murmured as she leaned into his touch on her cheek

“That’s my baby girl.” Tony said with a fond smile before pulling her into another tight hug, this time pulling her onto his lap. As he pulled her closer, he began peppering kisses all over Rose’s face, causing her to smile and laugh as she hugged her father back. Tony eventually pressed one final kiss to the top of her head before looking up. “Well would you look at that.” He mused as he looked around. Rose curiously looked up as well to see what he was talking about. The sun had been long gone and was replaced by the stars in the night sky. But Rose noticed little balls of lights flickering and floating all around them both. The fireflies were out tonight. “Pretty isn’t it?” Tony mused as he looked around with a smile. Rose couldn’t help but smile herself before whispering softly. “Beautiful”

Tags: @aricka-and-her-fictional-others @astralshipper @catangelalien-selfships @magicalbunbun

#self shipping #self ship #selfshipping #self ship community #self insert #marvel #mcu #selfship community #tony stark #irondad #familial f/o #parental f/o

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hoeshi-chan-blog · 6 years

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Ever since that day, [H/C] girl didn't believe it. She thought it was a dream. Everyday, every night. It was basically the same routine, wake up, get dress, go wake up Cloud, make breakfast, and get a job from someone. It was well, everything was fine, everything she said was a lie.

Cloud kept twitching/having geostigma attacks or getting distant from everyone, as if he had something. Until she knew, his infection/illness gotten worse. He rarely visits the bar, making Marlene and Denzel worried.

"[Y/N], your going to stay here for some of my deliveries."

The [H/C] girl was wrapping bandages around his arm, trying her best not to drop this shirt on the floor. He asked her to stitch some cuts on his shirts. Sure, he had a few but this one is his favorite. Even though he had a closet full of the same clothes. The duo were currently at a cliff, where the Buster sword. She tried her best not to cry, because this was the area her brother died. She tried to think of the present, not the past.

"Why?"

She went back to sewing his sleeve, but got no answer. She still pushed his buttons, getting an actual answer instead of the silence.

"Is it because of the geostigma?"

"I can't lie, but yes. Haven't you seen the size of it?"

[Y/N] snorted, and shook her head; mumbling, "That's what he said."

Cloud looked at her weirdly, but didn't show it. Only to himself.

"What?"

"Nothing..."

The girl was flustered, a pink shade of blush covered her cheeks as she finished sewing. However, the odds were against her as she poked herself with the needles, causing her to drop the shirt and put the finger in her mouth. Pouting like a little girl, she glared at the ground. But, she felt a slightly pat on her head, she looked up and saw Cloud holding a box of band-aids.

"You are clumsy. Very, very clumsy."

He hands her the box of bandaids and grabs his shirt. He looks at it carefully, he admire her artwork. No stitches were shown, everything was hand made.

"My mother taught me how to sew, and make my own clothes."

He was amused, Zack never talked about his mother. However, he did spoke about [Y/N], how she took over the house and became the mother.

"Its best for you to stay at Tifa's place. I need someone to take care of Denzel when Tifa is busy."

"You making up excuses. You-"

"Just do what I say, end of discussionl."

The [H/C] girl pouted and glared at Cloud. He didn't flinch or show any emotion, however he looked at her and shooed her off.

"Go cover your eyes or something."

Luckily for him, he was wearing a undershirt, but didn't stop [Y/N] to fangirl on his abs or how fit he was. Or else Cloud will have a partner who will nose bleed forever. She huffed, grabbed a bandaid, applied it on her finger and turned around slowly. She crossed her arms against her chest and blew a stand of hair out of her hair. It was slowly turning into noon, as the cloud started to form, making the sky turn a gloomy gray. [Y/N] stood there for a few minutes, until she heard heavy and soft foot steps close by her. She looked left, she saw Cloud's wolf who was next to the rusting Buster sword. On her right, she notice Cloud staring at the town of Midgar, seeing it differently. After the meteor hit it, the city was trying it best to stand on its feet. But with Geostigma in the air, it was very difficult since.

"You got a call from Reno. He's in Healen. Says he's got work for you. Cloud, how have you been?"

[Y/N] looked at Cloud as he looked at his phone, as if it was going to attack him.

"You have no messa-"

Cloud ended the robotic voice, puts on goggles, and walks to the Fenrir. Then, he motioned the [H/C] girl to the motorcycle. She nodded quickly and hoped on. The duo gave the rusty sword a glance once more and turned on the Fenrir. Putting on the bandanna around her nose and lips, because the last time she rode with Cloud, she had to use mouthwash three times. As the duo rode down the road, [Y/N] heard a metal fall' on the ground. When she turned around, the first thing she notice was the Buster sword in the ground. Shock written all over her face as she heard more motorcycle engines. When she looked up, starting at the cliff. Three men appeared, have similar clothes and similar hair color.

"Clo-"

#ffvii #ff7 #fanfic #xreader #final fantasy 7 #cloud strife #au

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thecreativeangel · 6 years

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Gym Class Losers (Eddie Kaspbrak x Reader)

Eddie Kaspbrak x Fem!Reader

*Please don’t plagiarize my work, thank you :3*

Summary: P.E. sucks, no questions asked, but when you get hurt during a game of soccer there is at least one cute boy who cares enough to help you. So yeah, P.E. still sucks ass, but maybe it’s not as bad as you initially thought.

Warnings: Guys… if you think this fanfic isn’t gonna have swearing you don’t know me well. This also includes minor mention of blood. Otherwise vERY FLUFFY.

Word Count: 1,459

Ah gym class, art thou the most fucked of classes. You think, wiping your sweaty palms on your gym shorts. You weren’t a loser or a huge nerd (although you got straight A’s), nor were you part of the Populars. You were just (Name), and P.E. wasn’t your thing. Sure, you didn’t fail like some kids, but the jocks made it impossible to even try at being good.

“Pass to me!”

“I’m open!”

Yeah right. You’re on the other side of the gym, trying to elbow a kid away from the goal. You’re about as “open” as a Mrs. Kaspbrak’s asshole. You shudder at the mental image of your new next door neighbor. The point was, even when the teams were an even ratio of athletic to non athletic, the jocks still managed to create a monopoly between themselves, almost entirely ignoring you and the less sporty people. You saw an uncomfortable looking brunette with sort of pudgy cheeks, who was on the other team, struggle to get out of the way as two girls, both known to be soccer players, almost trampled him to death fighting for the ball. You resisted the urge to snicker at his extremely awkward stature.

“So, um, maybe you could actually pass to me?” You ask one of the boys on your team, layering your sarcasm and frustration on thick. You have to walk alongside him as he moves down the “playing area”. If the P.E. teacher saw that you weren’t doing shit, he’d lower your grade, and that wasn’t an option.

“Will you be able to pass the ball?” Your teammate asks, distracted as he dribbles it down the gym, his eyes focused on the ground. You don’t get a chance to answer before another girl yells at him to keep moving and he runs away. The boy probably didn’t mean to be rude; he was just too into the game.

You harshly blow a strand of hair out of your face, feeling the gym teacher’s eyes on the back of your head. Jogging to where the most active players were, you almost begged to get the ball passed to you at least once until finally one of the nicer boys kicked it over. You stopped it with a foot and began to run towards the other team’s goal, enjoying the feeling of just maybe scoring a goal for once.

The cute brown haired boy showed up in the corner of your vision, giving you a nervous thumbs up. You turned back to the goal and stuck your tongue out of the corner of your mouth, biting down to keep concentrated on scoring and not the boy. Apparently you were too concentrated on the ball because seconds later someone came barreling into you and kicked the ball from under your feet, knocking you over sideways. Your face hit the floor, thankfully at an angle that your nose wasn’t broken, but you licked your top teeth and tasted sickeningly metallic ooze. You made a face as your tongue ran over a particularly sore spot, causing a sharp pain to erupt. That was P.E. for you; face planted, knees skinned, body sore, ego deflated.

No whistle was blown, the coach didn’t even look your way, the kid who hit you shouted a “sorry” over their shoulder and kept running. The only person who seemed to care was-

“A-are you okay? D’you need a bandaid? Or some gauze? Wait, no-”

You momentarily forget the aching pain and chuckle, scrambling up to see the person who cared to worry. You knew that voice. From the hallway and from class, you knew the voice of the brunette boy who always wore a fanny pack.

“I’m fine,” You assure him, again having to wipe your sweaty palms because he was cute and you were nervous.

“Are you sure?” He asks. “I can go get my-um… “

You observe him look away, suddenly embarrassed. “Your fanny pack?” You finish for him, remembering him in class, the weird thing always around his waist.

“Yeah…” He mumbles, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

“Hey Kaspbrain, come over here and play for once!” A ginger haired jock from his team yells.

“H-hey, don’t yell at me! If anything you should apologize! I saw you push (Name)!”

The ginger kid jogs over, towering over you and the brunette boy. “I said I was sorry.” He says flatly, crossing his arms. You eye him up and down, knowing that if this jock asked to “meet you both outside” to “work things out”, you’d quite possibly be dead by tomorrow. For some reason, the usually quiet brunette’s anger only seemed to flare.

“You aren’t sorry! I saw you laugh after you pushed her! God, how can you be s-”

You tugged on the sleeve of his shirt roughly and shook your head, pulling him away from the ginger jock.

“It’s not gonna end well.” You mutter from the corner of your mouth, taking a hallway pass from the P.E. coaches makeshift desk. The coach didn’t even ask why you were going, or if you were going to bleed out on the way. Looking behind, you were pleasantly surprised to find that the cute boy had followed you.

“I’m supposed to walk you down,” He explains.

“It’s fine, really,” You insist, but deep down you were incredibly happy that he stayed to walk you. It’s fine if you talk to me for the rest of the day-I won’t complain. “I’ll just stop by the nurse, maybe even get an excuse to go home.”

“Actually-” He stops walking and turns to the rows of lockers, stepping closer to number 290 and fumbling with the dial. “I have some stuff in my locker. School nurses are sort of useless…”

The brunette nearly slams his locker open and rummages through his backpack, pulling out what must have been at least fifty bucks worth of medical supplies. He turns back to you with arms full of bandages and a sheepish smile on his face.

“This should be enough.”

You sat on the cold tile floor of the teachers bathroom, watching the cute boy wet a cotton ball under the sink.

“So…d’you just…always have all this shit with you, just in case?”

He crouches down at your height and scrunched his nose, most adorably, you must admit. “My stuff is not ‘shit’!”

You snort, earning another small glare from him. “Yeah, okay…”

He tilts your chin up and begins to wipe away little dribbles of blood. You hope your face isn’t as red as you think it is, but it honestly shocks you how gentle he was, like hurting you would hurt him too.

“But really though,” You say as he pulls the now bloodied cotton ball away from your lip. “Why are you being so nice? And what’s your name? I know we have the same lunch and history class, that’s all.”

He sits down next to you, his back on the bathroom wall and laughs lightly. “You probably don’t remember.”

“Remember what?”

“W-well... On your first day of school you were obviously new and the bell was about to ring-but when you saw Victor Criss hit the binders out of my hands…” He stopped to take a deep breath, exhaling as if saying all this was a huge weight off his chest. “You still helped me pick them up, e-even though you’d be late for class…”

You lean your head against the wall, the scene flashing through your mind. You’d helped him because he looked just as lost as you, even though it wasn’t his first day at the school.

“And my name’s Eddie, by the way.”

You whip your head around to Eddie and he grins back. “So this is like debt? We’re even now?”

“No!” He exclaims, a bit too loudly. “I mean yes? Wait, no, it’s definitely not like debt. I just wanted to…”

Eddie mumbles something under his breath, avoiding your gaze.

You furrow your eyebrows. “What?”

He mumbles it again, a tiny bit louder this time.

You try to suppress the smile that was forming on your face. “I seriously can’t hear you.”

Eddie looks more flustered than ever, his cute cheeks dusted with pink. “Wh-yes you do!”

“One more time? Please?” You beg, giving him puppy eyes.

“I want to hang out with you, okay?” He nearly shouts, throwing his hands up for dramatic effect.

The smile on your face transforms into a bright beam. You looked down at the ground to hide your impossibly wide smile. With your cheeks and nose painted a brilliant sunset red, you manage to answer him in the softest, most adorable whisper he had ever heard.

“I want to hang out with you too…”

Authors Note: I know I need to finish “The Town of Forgetting” series, but here, have this instead ‘cuz fuck it I’m a huge procrastinator. @exoticeggos

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forevermizu · 5 years

Text

Too many thoughts

For the past several day, I've been in a really bad rut mentally with my anxiety and depression. Finally kind of crawling out a bit but my brain just has too many thoughts going through it and it's been extremely overwhelming. So here's just a rambling vent post to try and get some of it out. And obligatory on mobile so please excuse any spelling or grammar issues.

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Sometimes I wonder if part of my problem with my mental illnesses is based on where and when I grew up. Middle of fucking extremely conservative, end of the D.A.R.E. era, anything different is scary and wrong and you are wrong for being different Midwest nowhere U.S.A. And of course, as my beautiful lady luck willed it, I was different.

My mom used to say all the time, "She'll break down into tears if you even look at her wrong." Not in those exact words mind you because my mom was way better at phrasing it than me. But she was right. I was "sensitive" to an extreme. If I saw someone glance as at me, it might look like I was given the side eye or a stink eye. My brain would jump to, "Oh god. They're mad at me. What did I do? I don't know! I don't want them to be made at me!" And I would start tearing up. Oh I tried not to, getting madder and madder at myself that I was crying which just made me cry harder. And the other kids noticed so I became a target to bullies. I mean, I also made amazing friends, but the bullies would see me trying not to cry and decide that I needed to be put down further because nothing makes little kid bullies feel better than the tears of another.

And, mind you, that I had been this way my ENTIRE childhood. Like, I literally do not remember a time that I was not this "sensitive". Heck, I remember being like 4 at preschool and running to my mom at pick up because it was my turn to lead the pledge that day and none of the other kids would do what I said and even the teacher just sighed and told me to forget it and sit down. Then I was mocked the rest of the day because of how bad it went and how hard I was trying not to cry.

But everyone just told me to suck it up. That I need to stop being a crybaby and then it would get better. Like I wasn't already trying. Hell, in first grade, I accidentally stabbed myself with a pencil and started crying because it fucking hurt. We were reviewing the alphabet because it was like the first week or so of school and this was back when kids didn't have to know how to read and write before kindergarten. The para was trying to help me while the teacher kept going and asked for the next kid to give an example of a word that started with C.

"Crybaby. Cause (me) is a crybaby."

I had just stabbed myself with a number 2 pencil and was bleeding. The para had just noticed that the lead had broken off in my hand was still there. I felt like I was justified in crying. But the rest of the class didn't agree cause they all laughed. My teacher did tell them that that was very mean and took away a few points for some kiddie reward thing but that was kind of it. The para found a bandaid and slapped that on my hand and we went on with the day. Never went to the nurse either. I still have that piece of pencil lead in my hand and can still see it. So yay for a permanent reminder...

My friends were awesome and tried to help me but I don't think any of us realized that something was actually wrong with me. Looking back, I realize that I've always had some form of anxiety. Doesn't make any of it better but it gives me something to explain why I was the way I was. But back then, I didn't understand that other kids didn't freak out from looks because they just saw them for that. Looks. They didn't see the train tracks as a foot trap or every clap of thunder as a sign that a tornado was going to come. They didn't worry about what others thought as much because they could push it off better than I could. But I couldn't.

I had trouble falling asleep because the quiet let my brain wonder. So I started watching TV till I passed out not to stay up, but because I wanted my brain to stay quiet. Well, mostly for that reason. Toonami and Adult Swim was awesome for little me.

Anyways, like I said, my friends were awesome but when I looked around and saw what looked like everyone else hating me, it did a number on my self esteem and confidence. I just wanted others to like me. So, when all the teachers would praise me for being so smart or that I did something well, I soaked it up. I was a teacher's pet. And when the anti-bully movement swept through and told us to tell a teacher whenever we see bullying. Bet you can guess what happened next.

I became what everyone called a tattletale. If my peers didn't like me but I thought my teacher's did, I always went to my teachers for any issue. A kid knocked over my sand castle? Teacher. A kid called me a bitch (yes. In elementary school). Teacher. I heard some girls gossiping about another student. Teacher.

I didn't really stop to think how the other kids felt being told on. I just went to the teachers because that was what I was told and they already didn't like me, so what was the worse that could happen?

Well, it got worse for one. And soon some of my teachers started getting annoyed with me and saying that I just needed to stop...being me. Grow a thick skin. Stop provoking them. "If you stop being a tattletale, they'll like you more. Nobody likes them."

But they were the ones that told us to come to them when we saw bullying or if we were being bullied.

By the end of 4th grade, I think the only thing that kept me remotely sane was my few friends.

But our town has an overpopulation of the schools. They are constantly trying to shift around how the kids are separated out because none of the buildings can handle them all. Like, there were 5 or 6 elementary schools in town but only one middle school. So to help integrate and break up the amount in the middle school, we had intermediate school for 5 and 6th grade. There were 2 of these. My best friend went to one and I went to another. The rest of my friends were in completely different classes and I never saw them.

Suddenly, I was alone in school. Very quickly, all the kids grew to hate me, throwing me down to the bottom of the food chain. And the teachers either didn't care or didn't like me. This is about when, looking back, that I think my depression really started to develop. From about the age of 10 to 12ish, I was alone. Sure i made new friends but not in my class so i still didn't have anyone in the room to depend on.

Another important detail is, at least for where I grew up, this was when people didn't believe that depression was an actual thing. That it was a made up illness for lazy people. That everyone got sad. They just need to sack up.

Looking back...I showed WAY too many signs of depression that I really should have been noticed and diagnosed back then. But everyone just thought I was "sensitive".

And, because of what was being expressed by others, I angrily denied that voice in my head that said that maybe there was something to this depression. That maybe that's what was wrong with me. But that couldn't be right. Even if depression was real, what did I have to be depressed about? I had three square meals a day, pets, my parents loved me and my sister and were still together, I didn't have any reason to be depressed. Even when my mom had a heart attack. Even when my grandma died. I still had so much. How could I be depressed?

This was about when mother nature threw her hand into the lot and granted me my horrendous period. Suddenly, now I was always anxious, always depressed, but I was also always angry at everything. I was just...done with it all. When my grandma passed, I had to go through mandatory "grief therapy" in school. It made me miss my bus every day so my mom had to pick me up and had to sit and wait until she finished work to go home. I think this was about when I started to maybe think something was wrong about me.

But what could I do about it? I had seen commercials about medication for depression late at night but D.A.R.E. had beaten me over my head that ANY drug, including medications, was the absolute worse thing you could ever do. Medications were for people that needed them to survive. That had "actual" things wrong with them. Any other use of any type of medication was bad and just like using crack or meth.

Besides...telling anyone that I needed help would only bother others...and really, the only thing I could think of that would make it any better was if I just stopped existing. But whenever those thoughts came up, my anxiety would spike because, y'know...death.

My sister says I finally grew a back bone at the end of 6th grade but not really. I was still just as "sensitive". My hormones just made me respond in angry instead of crying. I still cried, but I was just so angry all the time. This continued through 7th. I didn't ask for help because what could I even do? There didn't seem to be anything that would ever make any of what was going on in my head better and easier to deal with.

Then my mom had another heart attack and we had to move. We moved to a smaller town and suddenly, while everyone still kept their distance and I didn't fit in, I wasn't hated. I could breath a little because yeah I was different, but there weren't as many others to worry about. I made new friends and created my own niche group. I was still constantly anxious and depressed and angry, but it was...better.

I met others that suffered from depression and were on medication. They seemed so happy and not...tired like I was from fighting all the time with my brain. It had gotten better during the day, but the silence of night brought with it thoughts of death. And I hated it. Hated myself for them. Others were managing, why couldn't I?

...I haven't gone to bed without the TV or youtube on since 10th grade...I'm 26 now...the silence brings too many bad thoughts. White noise makes my anxiety spike though. It has to be listening to some sort of talking.

But it was better during the day, most of the time, so that was good. Other than my friends, I avoided anything that would put me in large groups because I didn't want to deal with all that stress again. My mom still gives me shit for not joining the Honors Society because it would look good on my college applications.

Eventually, I got pretty numb to the world around me. The only things I really cared about were my friends and family, anime (yes I was a weeaboo/otaku), and writing. Some days, those were the only thing keeping me going.

Eventually, I met my future husband through fanfiction (go figure) and it started getting better. College sucked, but at least people finally noticed that I needed help. I finally got told that I didn't have to keep fighting like this. I started going to therapy and got.put on meds.

And holy shit, it was like overnight. I still had times of being anxious or depressed but no where near as bad. I could hold conversations without always being worried about how I came across or double meanings. I could start falling asleep without thoughts of death, though I still need something playing. I unlearned bad habits I developed to cope and learned new ones.

But more than that, I watched as the same world that had told me that I was wrong change to be more accepting of mental illnesses. I didn't feel as alone because others were going through similar things. I finally got to see that I wasn't wrong. Just different.

I still look back to when I was growing up and wonder how different everything could have been if just one person growing up had said that this kid needs help.

Well, I guess they might have. According to my mom, my teachers complained to her about having me tested for then ADD, now ADHD. And she did. But the docs said I didn't present the right symptoms. Except nowadays, docs realize that girls present with different symptoms to boys. Soooo...maybe something would have been noticed if they knew that now. But who knows.

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Sorry for the long rambling post. Just needed to get it off my chest. Might delete it later.

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