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#tim is an innocent child
rubydubydoo122 · 3 months
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I’m just gonna say this, the main reason people don’t like Damian Wayne as a character is the same reason people didn’t like Jason Todd back in the 80s
People don’t like either of them because their favorite Robin (Tim Drake and Dick Grayson) got replaced by them.
Damian and Jason are both really interesting and complex character, objectively more complex than both Tim and Dick, but some people (cough, obnoxious Tim fans, cough, and Dick fans who over sexualize him, cough) don’t see that and just want their little blorbos to never grow into their own character apart from Batman.
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goatpaste · 1 year
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mmm thinking with my stupid brain about how i'd rewrite mountain tim so hard its making me ill
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charlietheepicwriter7 · 2 months
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De-Aged Danny, gesturing to a dazed Bruce inside Wayne Manor: And this is Bruce! Otherwise known as the Himbo! Reporters: Hmm, yes, interesting... Bruce: What the- Danny: I'm not sure what that word means. I heard it from Dick, but no one will give me my answer, not even Jason, who is easily bribed. Bruce: Why are there reporters in my house!? Danny, innocent and childlike: They asked to come inside, Bruce! They seemed like really nice people, so I thought it'd be polite to give them a tour. Bruce, filled with infinite patience: I really wish you had asked me before you did that, chum. Danny: But why? We don't have anything to hide... do we, Bruce?
Or, in order to rise to the Ghost Throne, Danny has to complete a series of trials to prove he is capable of ruling (or any other reason, Danny just needs to do trials to prove himself).
The last trial, issued by Clockwork, is thus: discover the Wayne Family secret in two weeks without the use of any of his powers.
He has one shapeshift to pick a form that could endere him to the Waynes, but only one before he starts and he has to get close to the family by his own wits. Danny, after studying the family and reading of one sentence summary of each Wayne, picks the body of a six-year-old little boy that looked like a child Jason Todd.
Bruce: That child is up to something. Dick, third favorite: I don't know, Bruce; he acts like a normal kid. Jason, #1 favorite: I doubt the old man's ever met a normal kid. Tim, least favorite: Bruce is right, but can you please not talk like the villains from Chicken Run.
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noisilyscreechingsong · 10 months
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Eyes
Dp x Dc Crossover Writing Idea
“Red Robin!”
When he backtracked to find the owner of the voice he was a bit surprised to find a young boy, maybe eight years old if he had to guess, dressed in a red sweatshirt that dwarfed him and a pair of gym shorts that had seen better days.
Not many Gothamites called out to the vigilantes, a silent agreement to stay out of their way and not to look too closely. This kid however stared up at him with bright blue eyes unafraid of getting the Red Robin’s attention.
A fan?
Before he even opens his mouth, the kid gives him a small, hopeful smile, eyes shining with something that reminds him of himself when he was that age and following Batman and Robin with his camera around his tiny neck.
“I brought you a gift,” the boy say with nervous excitement. He enthusiastically swings off the backpack he had on to dig through the contents, taking his eyes off the vigilante and showing his unwavering trust that nothing bad would happen to him while Red Robin was here.
The boy pulls out what appears to be a jar wrapped in newspaper, the worn page ripping in some spots to show the clear glass underneath. Small hands present it like it’s Red Robin’s birthday (which it wasn’t).
He takes it cautiously, the kid hasn’t been hostile but this was still weird, and pulls it closer with enough space so if it’s a bomb it doesn’t blow up in his face.
It’s got weight to it and the slight sloshing tells him it’s filled with liquid. He carefully unwraps the ‘gift’, keeping his eye on the boy who stands waiting anxiously.
Tim almost drops the jar as soon as he sees what’s inside. Only his reflexes from over the years held on and his expression turned neutral.
A pair of eyes sit at the bottom of the jar. The orbs were crudely extracted, tissue floating around them like a mane of hair around a head.
He turns the jar to see the irises and… he knew these eyes. The slimy green is filmed with death, but he recognized these eyes from the number of times the owner locked them onto him, the cruel possessiveness they possessed when they gazed at him. Never again apparently.
Tim doesn’t speak for a while, not knowing what to say, but also thoughts racing too fast to form any proper sentences.
“Do you like it?” The small, nervous voice interrupts those thoughts.
What an innocent question on an equally innocent looking face.
“How did you get Ra’s Al Ghul’s eyes?”
The teasing chatter over the comms immediately hushes into shocked silence.
“I took them from his body, so you knew he was dead. I burned the rest so you don’t have to worry about him coming back again. The Pit there is gone anyway,” the child explains easily, not fazed in the slightest from the words he speaks.
“Grandfather is dead?” He hears Damian whisper over the comm.
So many other questions were flying through Tim’s head. He looks the kid over again.
Black hair and blue eyes. In any other situation the kid might have been a possible Wayne adoptee. He’s not a clone from what he can see though. Despite the coloring he doesn’t really look like any of them. Pale skin like Tim, but has freckles. The same kind of nose as Damian, but wide, round eyes. Jaw kind of like Jason, but his body shape is too narrow. Bright, almost icy blue eyes like Dick, but eyebrow shape is flatter. Lip shape like Bruce, but from the kid’s anxious lip biting he could see the faintest trace of dimples.
“Who are you?” He asks instead of the other million and one questions.
The boy blinks almost like he wasn’t expecting the question. He’s cheeks color pink with blush as he grins widely.
“I’m Danny!” He introduces cheerfully like he didn’t just hand a vigilante a jar of eyes.
“Hi, Danny,” Tim greets almost dumbly. “Want to tell me why you gave me this?”
Danny scoffs his shoe against the pavement in what appears to be embarrassment.
“Well, I know when you ask someone for something, it’s nice to give a gift or something. Like I did something nice for you so maybe you’ll do something nice for me?”
He takes a moment to absorb that child-like reasoning.
“So you want me to do something for you and you thought I would like Ra’s Al Ghul’s eyes in exchange?”
Danny studies him and fidgets with the large sweatshirt sleeve.
“I just thought you would like proof. Like the whole ‘bring me the heart of my enemy’ kind of thing. Do you not like it? I couldn’t just take a picture ‘cuz I didn’t have a camera with me, I know you like photography. I can do something else for you if it’s not enough,” he offers worriedly.
Tim freezes.
“How do you know I like photography?” He demands.
Danny tilts his head curiously.
“Because Tim Drake likes photography,” he says like it’s obvious, “and you’re Tim Drake.”
Well. This is less than ideal.
“Red Robin, take him back to the Cave,” Batman instructs over the comms.
Yeah, he was getting there.
“Do you know the other’s’ identities?”
Danny nods and hums affirmatively. Tim waits.
“Oh! Yea. Batman is Bruce Wayne. Robin is Damian Wayne. Red Hood is Jason Todd. Nightwing is Richard Grey-“
“Okay. That’s enough.”
Tim glances around the empty alley they were standing in, checking to make sure no stray people heard. Luckily they were truly alone.
“Danny, do you want to come back with me?” He asks, but it’s not really a question. The kid was coming back regardless, it would just be better if he went willingly.
Unsurprisingly, the kid lights up like a little sun at the offer.
“Really?” He nearly shouts in excitement.
“Yeah, kid. I parked my bike a few blocks from here. You ever rode a motorcycle before?”
Danny shakes his head, nearly bounding on his toes.
“Not in this lifetime.” And wasn’t that odd wording? “Are we gonna grapple there?”
“Think you can hold on?”
“Yeah!”
He kneels down so the boy can climb onto his back and lock his arms around his neck and hook his feet together around his torso. Danny is worryingly light as he stands.
The kid is the picture of an excited and overeager child as they carefully fly over rooftops and then drive back to the Cave. Even when they park inside the safety of the Batcave, Danny’s eyes are filled with child-like awe and wonder, so curious and chattering with questions and wild imagination. It would be cute, endearing even, if the jar of eyes wasn’t sitting heavily in his pocket.
Alfred came down not too long after their arrival with a tray of healthy snacks and some waters. Danny happily munches on the apple slices as he wanders around where Tim can see him.
The rumble of the Batmobile can be heard almost an hour later after Tim has to tell Danny not to touch the weapons for the fourth time. The kid’s attention is drawn to the sleek black vehicle as it parks by Tim’s bike. He trots over with wide eyes as the doors open and Robin exits, then Batman.
Unfortunately, Dick is in Bludhaven and Jason is visiting Roy and Lian this week. Cass and Steph were gone as well and Duke was sleeping. It was just the three of them and this kid with Alfred as the only buffer.
Danny stares openly, curious, as the duo makes their way over to the computer where Tim has claimed his sit.
Tim turns the jar that he set on the table so the eyes are facing them and slowly leans back again, suddenly very tired. Damian flexes his hands into fists tightly while Batman is very still.
“Hi,” Danny chirps like nothing is wrong, oblivious to the tension in the air.
Batman takes a measured breath. Robin glares down at the child, but remains silent for now.
“Who killed Ra’s Al Ghul?”
Danny blinks blankly.
“Nobody.”
“You’re saying he just dropped dead?” Damian sneered in sarcasm.
“Death took him,” the child says simply as if that explained everything.
“How?” The word is demanded and emphasized.
“Like Death takes everyone. His expiration was overdue.”
Bruce frowns and Damian almost snarls.
“I demand you start making sense!”
Danny glares back in offense.
“I’m being very clear! Maybe you should ask better questions!”
The twelve year old growls at the smaller child and Batman has to place a firm hand on his shoulder to keep him from attacking.
“Danny?” Batman questions after a tense moment.
The boy’s arms are crossed in irritation, but he blinks out of his glare to stare up at the man.
“Yea?”
“How do you know our identities?”
“Oh, memories.”
Danny looked like everything he said made sense and it was driving Tim up a wall.
“Memories,” Bruce repeats.
“Uh-huh,” Danny nods confidently. “From the Lazarus Pit.”
A jolt goes through Tim as he recalls what the boy said earlier about the Pit.
“Didn’t you say the Pit was gone?” He asks before Bruce could continue his line of questioning.
Danny turns with a bright smile as if he was proud Tim remembered.
“Yea! Well, gone from this world anyway.” Tim was concerned. “I took the memories from it before sending it back where it belongs.”
“Okay. How did you know how to ‘take the memories’ and send it back? Back where?”
“I was born from it. Duh. It went back to the Realms or I guess you’d call it the Afterlife,” Danny actually rolls his eyes as if they should already know this.
“Born from it?” Damian asks with a wavering voice, hidden well from the child but not from them. “Nothing has ever been born from the Pits.”
“That you know of.”
And wasn’t that the kicker.
“So, to clarify, you come from the Pits. You know who we are because you took the memories from said Pits. Death took Ra’s because his time was up. And you took the eyes from his corpse to give to me because you thought I would like it as a gift so I would do something for you.”
Danny positively beams.
“This is why you’re my favorite!”
Damian grinds his teeth harshly.
“What is it you want Red Robin to do for you?” Batman asks in strangled hesitation.
“Oh!” Danny perks up like he remembered and hops over to Tim with pleading hands. “Can you please make me an identity? You’re really good at all that stuff and I was hoping you could find me a family. Someone to adopt me. A nice family, with a bed and family dinners and a dog. I always wanted a dog.”
Tim has the sudden urge to scream.
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laxxarian · 2 months
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Kon sees Danny in Metropolis thinking it was Tim but as he got closer (to say hi), he was mistaken.... But then he hears Danny's lack of heartbeat.
In growing concern, he wanted to ask if he was a meta too so he went up and tapped on Danny's shoulder, causing Danny to turn 180 to face Kon.
Kon asks and Danny is puzzled, he has no idea what a meta is.
When Kon was about to explain, Danny was called by Tucker who was waving at him excitedly to come over.
As it turns out, Amity Parkers rarely gets out of their town/city, making it seem like everything is new when they get out and also making the Parkers seem like an innocent child wanting to explore the world. But of course, there were some exceptions like Vlad, Jack, Maddie and Sam.
Anyways, Danny was about to bid farewell to Kon when Kon asked if he could come with. Danny didn't mind so now Ko is with the trio having fun with Kon observing the trio.
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pinkcowzz · 1 month
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dick had bruce as a partner. there was a mentorship there yes, but at the end of the day dick & bruce were a team.
jason had bruce as a father. bruce took him and made the extra effort. he actually adopted jay and stayed home when jason was sick.
tim had bruce as a liability.
tim went to bruce- bruce never found him. i just really love the idea that because of the difference in dynamic, tim is one of the few people who can shame bruce into compliance so easily.
dick and bruce will get into shouting matches that neither one of them walk away from being satisfied, bruce is an unmovable object and dick is an unstoppable force. when they meet, its not pretty and there is almost always collateral damage.
jason and bruce are like setting off two firecrackers next to each other when they fight. it's loud, it's bright, but it burns off fast. the anger and righteous fury is there one moment but then gone the next.
tim and bruce fight differently, because a lot of the time, tim understands where bruce is coming from. he saw bruce start on his path to self destruction and managed to get him to switch tracks. bruce was never the same after jason's death (what parent is after seeing their child die) but batman was able to correct himself. after stepping into the role of robin, tim understood. he too lost so many people he cared about because of the weight of the cape he wore.
and i think the first time that damian and bruce go head to head, dick may be the one who comforts damian and assures him of his place in the family, but tim is the one who goes to bruce. it's the first time bruce has ever seen tim this angry. tim is seething with a fury that would put the devil himself to shame. he is so angry that he is shaking and bruce can the restraint that tim is using to keep the discussion from becoming physical. tim tells bruce, or rather lectures him, in all the ways that he has fucked up with dick ('kicking him out, never officially adopting him, forcing him to go through with the spyral mission- you treat him as your partner when its convenient but the moment it's not he is your soldier again. its unfair bruce. he's more of a man, more of a father than you have ever been'), with jason ('do i even need to say it? actually, let me address it. you cannot see the forest past the trees. jason isn't who he was before he died. he never will be. same as you. he lost a lot more than his life when the joker blew him up. he lost his innocence, he lost his faith in you. i'm starting to think he may have been right') and with himself ('i love you bruce. i have always cared so deeply about you and your mission. it's why i came to dick in the first place. but this isn't about me.').
and bruce remembers why his relationship with tim is so different. tim trained overseas, tim got to patrol on his own as robin so much sooner than his other boys did. tim was largely unsupervised during his run with the young justice. tim had made up an entire fake uncle to keep his indepence. tim would never argue with bruce about himself in this way, but he would argue about- ('this is about damian. and i swear to god bruce. if you can't pull that stick out of your ass and find a way to apologize to damian that leaves him feeling properly taken care of. superman himself wouldn't be enough to save you from my wrath.')
and it's only later, after bruce does apologize to damian in a way that leaves dick speechless. when barbra happened upon the cave's security footage that she shares with dick who shares with steph who shares with jason that his family figures out just how fitting of a last name that drake is for tim.
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anxiousnerdwritings · 3 months
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I am going FERAL over this imagine:
So basically Bruce brings reader home to be his new daughter/the boys' new sibling but Uh Oh! They now want you carnally and reader is just like "you said you wanted me as a daughter/sibling, wtf is this" and being their platonic darling is better than being shared between them romantically so reader tries to come off as innocent and child/sibling coded by being like "yeah I've never actually kissed or dated anyone before aren't I just so innocent" and the boys are like :)))
So then Dick says you can call him your boyfriend "just to feel it out" and Tim starts blatantly stealing your panties and Jason says he can give you your 1st kiss so you can "practice" with him and Bruce offers to teach you how to touch yourself and (and him) and when you try to walk it back cause the boys are being Freaks they're in their delulu era so eventually you end up tied to the bed with the boys and Bruce drawing straws over who gets to take what 1sts (like 1st date, kiss, virginity, ect).
And Damien is just in the background absolutely SEETHING cause the the boys and Bruce's Horny Time keeps interrupting his Mommy Time with the reader
And reader using Damien as kind of a shield cause what are they going to do, feel you up in front of a CHILD? Like just, "Stay Platonic :))"
Just that kind of pseudo incest makes me Feel Things (*/∀\*)(///∇///)
I'd love your thoughts/a fic based on this! Ty ❤️
TW: Brief mentions of pseudo incest(y) scenarios/behavior, manipulative tactics, yandere tendencies
(Okay so I’ll answer this with my thoughts for right now.)
I know I primarily write incest(y) related topics for my Game of Thrones/ASOIAF stuff but I have been tempted to/curious about branching it out into some of the other fandoms I write for 👀. (I’ve had a few ideas rolling around in my noggin for a bit if anyone is interested.) So I would be willing to give this a try. I’m down to experiment with some new stuff, within reason of course.
I imagine the Reader being older (probably 19-23), maybe even having been a runaway of sorts or not having a very stable home life, so when they’re given the ‘offer’ to become part of the family they’re looking to fulfill a familial void they’ve never experienced or have forgotten how it’s felt like. I definitely see Bruce and the rest of the boys keeping a very close eye on the Reader before they decide to finally bring them into their family, basically full on stalking them from the moment they caught their attention (you know how the Batfam works). It wouldn’t be a surprise if even before the Reader was with them physically that the boys developed a more carnal desire for them. At first, their intentions were completely platonic, but with all the lengthy observing and information gathering of their supposed-to-be-new-family-member eventually something changed in how they all saw their darling.
I really see the change in their obsession starting with either Dick or Tim first. Especially regarding some accidental or purposeful peeping Tom foolery. I feel like Bruce would be the last to fall victim to the change in direction or at the very least he’s the last one to admit to it. If Damian is younger than I see his obsession staying strictly platonic, but if he were much older than I could see him involving himself to the same depths as his family.
At first, I see things happening subtly. Knowing that at the very least a few of them are already in an obsessive-romantic headspace in regards to their darling before they even physically become part of the family the guys would try to be as welcoming as possible without revealing their true intentions. They don’t want to scare you off right away, they want you to walk into it semi-willingly at least. But the interactions with the Reader would show something else. The lingering touches, the being much closer to you than really necessary, the heated grazes over your clothes here and there that leave you wondering if that actually happened or not. I also kind of like the other members not being fully aware of each other’s change in obsession, everyone giving each other the side eye until it sets in and then all out war of who gets the darling to themself unfolds only to eventually end up with them working together and agreeing to share. That’s when Bruce’s heel-turn is revealed.
Once things get truly amped up, the interactions with the Reader really begin to escalate. The boys would walk around shirtless more often, all of them trying to get their darling to look at them, to really look at them. Eventually, it’s not just them being shitless but either them in nothing but their underwear or nothing at all. They start out as accidents but eventually it’s pretty loud and clear that the guys want you to see them, all of them, to even touch them and feel them to your hearts content. But thats not all, of course it’s not. The touching of their darling only gets all the more intense, to the point that you know damn well that they’re touching you and they want to leave you wanting for more. So much more. The Reader’s innocence and lack of experience would only spur them on even more. They absolutely thrive off of it. They all want to be your first, your first everything. There will be a lot of secret ‘lessons’ being given behind closed doors and telling of “Don’t tell Batdaddy or he’ll get real mad.” “Don’t let Jay know, or he’ll want to punish you for not doing this with him.” “Let this be our secret, (Name). Something just for you and me.” “Can’t tell anyone about this or they’ll ruin it for the both of us.” And they only get even worse from there.
I can’t see Alfred being okay with this in any situation, whatsoever. I think he especially would feel like Bruce and the other boys completely took advantage of the Reader and he would try his best to aid them in trying to keep up with the platonic intention of this entire fiasco. He would be a total cockblock, even going as far as helping Damian in his cockblocking endeavors. Alfred’s intention would be to play both sides so he knows how to help the Reader when it comes to Bruce and the others but it wouldn’t take too long for them to figure out that Alfred is working against them. Like, Alfred was all for the familial-platonic obsession but when things started getting more romantic he was ready to shut that shit down ASAP. You can’t tell me he hasn’t, at least a few times, locked Bruce, Dick, Jason, and Tim out of the house to give the Reader some peace and give Damian his much deserved allotted time with them.
Speaking of Damian, he is a menace (as per usual) but even more so than normal. He really doesn’t take too well to the new direction of his father’s and brothers’ obsession for the Reader. He thinks it’s pretty messed up but he sincerely likes and cares about the Reader and he wants them to stay, he wants them to continue being a part of the family forever so he’ll let some things slide. Some. He even may be willing to look the other way when it eventually comes to Bruce, Dick, Jason, and Tim baby-trapping the Reader if it means this whole ‘family’ thing becomes set in stone with the arrival of a new ‘sibling’. But for the most part, at least early on, Damian would be a huge pain in the ass for the other family members. He feels like he needs to step in to save his darling from the others and their ulterior motives. He’s all his parental/older sibling figure needs, at least at that point. He may even try to runaway with them to keep them safe from the others. Hell, he may even get his mother involved if he was desperate enough, especially if he saw the Reader as a parental figure. Or maybe even another Justice League member to either adopt him and the Reader so that he could have that family experience he was promised with the Reader. Or he would be completely content just living the rest of his life just him and the Reader, platonically of course.
It would either take Bruce or Dick to have a talk with Damian to get him to come to some agreement to allow them to continue with what they’re doing in regards to the Reader. I think Dick would get away with manipulating Damian much better than Bruce could. I think Damian would have some opinions about his father especially throughout this whole situation. Especially since I see Damian being very observant of how Dick, Jason and Tim are behaving towards the Reader early on and picking up on the fuckery taking place, even going as far as telling Bruce about it under the belief his father would be on his side (not ever fathoming the idea of his father also doing similar things to the Reader without him ever knowing). As far as Damian knew his father was completely platonic towards the Reader, as a ‘father’ should be. Right? So understandably Damian feels not only betrayed but also disgusted when he finds out that his father was and still is taking part in, acting in a similarly depraved fashion as the others.
Eventually, I could see them coming together and being one big ‘happy’ family. But it sure as hell comes at a price. (Usually the Reader’s freedom and sense of self outside of the obsession they’ve been dragged into, to drown in alongside their yandere(s).)
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batfamluvr · 2 months
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Hi, I don't know If you take requests, but could you please right about the reaction and thoughts of the bat boys toward finding out their partner was pregnant? Please and thank you
A/N: I do take requests, love. And I've got you ❣️
Bat-boys find out you're pregnant🍼
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Dick Grayson's first thought is worry. He doubts how he'll make it work; crimefighting, his job, then his relationship with you. And he'll wonder how Nightwing will interfere with his life, and how Bruce will react (he'll spoil the child endlessly).
Reassurance from Donna, Alfred, or Bruce will part his fog of worry and distance. He'll hit the ground running to rectify his isolation. I mean breaking the news to friends and family, arranging play dates with Roy and Lian.
"I'll be safer on patrol," he whispered," I promise, hun." You had broke down after so long of trying to remain calm. But seeing your lover return home with bruise after bruise would weigh anyone down. Especially one pregnant.
Dick's hand would always be on your belly, reminding himself that you both are safe and he's doing a great job. It's what he needs to hear, that he's making the city safer for you both.
He is 100% a handyman. Dick will build cribs, changing tables, repair toilets, fix creaky cabinets. And he'll baby proof the house." Don't worry, babe," he assured you." Just relax. It's just a clogged drain."
Jason Todd's first thought is if he'd be a good father, after everything he's been through and done. He even wonders if he deserves to be a father, or if he deserves a nameless grave. However, leaving is never and will never be an option for him. I truly think he'd be the most active out of the bat-boys.
Jason's love language has always been acts of service, and it would thrive during your pregnancy. Your house would be booby-trapped and SECURED. He'd teach you the basics of a gun, and he'd ensure your pregnancy cravings are stocked. Jason would also wash your back when your belly grew too large.
Jason would let you shop for baby and maternity clothes with his card. His only request is that you don't get the baby anything too vibrant because it's an eyesore. If anything, he'd prefer neutral tones or black on the baby.
The weather becomes his interest after the baby's birth." Do you think they need a jacket?" Is his favorite line." Don't you think it's a little hot for them to be wearing long sleeves," he'll wonder. Or the baby is swaddled and he'll question," do you think he's overheating? I'd be hot if that were me all wrapped up like that."
A child is the only thing to make him stand steadfast on his refusal to kill. Not Bruce, not Dick, not even you. Your child brought forth a new mindset, one of not wanting to see a killer reflecting in the innocent and chocolate eyes of his child (Jason's eyes are brown. Argue with a wall).
Tim Drake isn't as present as one would believe. His activity is inconsistent, and it's harder to reach him because he's usually working. But he wants you to sit with him, to bring the baby and let him play around in his office.
It warms his heart to return from a meeting and his baby is sprawled out on his pastel blue teddy bear blanket and cooing. You're dangling a rattle over him, and Tim would strut over and kiss you on the cheek." How's it going, love?" He'd ask and rub the baby's cheek." They being good?" His eyebrow would raise playfully.
The baby would be raised around Bruce and Alfred more than his actual parents. I also see Stephanie caring for the baby and even babysitting if you work or just need rest. Cass would swoon over it, so prepare for tons of peeled oranges and Cass making your bottles.
Alfred would surely read your baby literature. He'd be sitting in the library, baby on his lap while y'all rest, reading from a dusty and old book that's sure to ignite your allergies.
Damian would try his hardest to be a fun dad because he never got that. It's been well documented that he wouldn't dare put a child through his life. So I think the farthest he would go is teaching you enough to defeat the average Shadow/Assassin. But he would not want you killing.
I think he'd lean into Bruce's "No-Kill" mantra after having a child. If you even want to enter vigilantism; he'd understand if you choose not to. It's a thankless job; it's isolating and bruising.
But I think if the kid did continue training, that's when they'd truly bond. Damian and he/she would laugh and joke between rounds; he'd show them the best way to throw a punch, and he'd teach mercy. That's also when they'd meet the other side of their family---the Al Ghuls. But Damian would have strict stipulations on what they learn. No instant kill moves, no brainwashing, none of the narcissistic sentiments Talia filled his head with.
I also think you, Damian, and your kid would lead fairly healthy lives. Not overboard, but the occasional protein shake or morning run; maybe even a little weight lifting. Or if cardio is your speed, he'd install a home-treadmill or a pool.
Bruce Wayne's first thought would be his age. How he's climbing in age and his job usually doesn't lead to gold and sunsets. He'd be happy because he sees it as a second chance. His first two sons saw the angry and vengeful side of him, so that's how they grew up; Tim sought him, and Damian came stained with blood.
But with you and the baby, he could actually be a father. He could raise the baby from infancy and make bottles and hush cries, like he wanted to with Dick and Jason. He could show the baby his favorite movies and just talk to them, even though the baby would respond with drool and coos.
He wouldn't have to be alone anymore. Bruce would set his child on a straight path; the world has enough Bats and birds. They could just...be. They'd would carry on the Wayne name.
Bruce would spoil you and his baby rotten. He'd watch over the baby like a hawk; each cry, each coo, each babble would send Bruce into a fit of worry. He'd leap up from his seat and check the cradle, only to find a giggling baby with his feet in the air. Then he'd chuckle, which would make the baby giggle even more. " You got me, little one. You got me," he'd utter and return to the Bat-computer.
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Au in which Tim is the demon child. Literally.
He is a creature born from an magical amulet that the drakes brought home and by the negative emotions surrounding Gotham
As such, he has two forms:
The innocent blue eyed child (because most of the cruel and corrupt people in Gotham are the normal looking ones) and the nightmare mass of darkness (the one you see when you enter an alley by night).
What is the most important thing of this AU is that he has contracts with the entire batfam, without them knowing.
For him, these contracts aren't about power and the ability to control someone, but a way to protect them.
He knows where they are and how they are doing, because their souls are deeply inwired with his.
As such, the batfam is also getting some favors.
In Alfred's case, Tim keeps him from dying and makes sure his old body isn't bothering him.
He got those contracts in different ways:
Alfred: giving him an old photo of Jason, before he came back.
Bruce: talking him through an Jason induce emotional breakdown
Dick: hugging/holding him through a joker venom induced nightmare
Babara: helping her build and design a new wheelchair
Jason: forgiving him for the Titans Tower incident
Steph: dating free pass/helping her in the prank war against his siblings
Cass: gifting her some of his and his mother clothes.
Duke: helping him build a reputation for Signal and making sure that the press isn't losing a single bad word about him.
Damian: helping him with a pet emergency
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thecruellestmonth · 4 months
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Tim gets deaged. Damian and Jason take one look at this tiny, precious, innocent little child who just wants to be loved... and then they immediately wave goodbye to Steph and walk away. They ignore Tim until he's back to normal and ready for work.
Tim spends his time screaming for his iPad, his mommy and daddy, and a very specific brand of organic chicken nuggets.
Duke lets Tim have a sip of his Zesti cola, and from that moment on Tim refuses to drink any liquid with less than 40g of added sweeteners. Dick's decision to be a childless dog-dad is reaffirmed.
Tim keeps switching the TV to unboxing videos while Cass is trying to marathon the Predator movies, so she nerve-strikes him into unconsciousness. Alfred takes a photo of them "cuddling" on the couch while Tim is knocked out cold and drooling.
Tim plasters his borax slime into Steph's favorite sweater, so she takes him and his credit card out on a clothes shopping spree at the mall. He's taken hostage by Condiment King at the food court. Steph changes into Batgirl to save him, and Tim plasters more slime into her suit.
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mikeluciraphgabe · 6 months
Text
Bruce introducing Clark as his partner for the first time and the bat kids taking the opportunity for what it is
-
Dick
Clark wonders in the kitchen around 5am to start a family breakfast as Alfred is on his rare vacation in Europe.
He had already been halfway through when he finally noticed the body standing in the door way.
“… Dick? Are you ok?”
There’s no answer.
“Dick?”
Clark doesn’t even get a chance to blink before Dick is holding a sharp piece of Kryptonite to his neck. “You hurt my dad and I’ll show you just how fucked up a human truly could be.”
And this, this is the Robin that Clark knew.
This was the Robin who was angry and violent during his training with Batman.
This was Robin who made Bruce grow from angry and violent himself and learned how to be an actual person and how to love for the first time in a long time.
This was the Robin who wouldn’t hesitate to kill a man for taking the last of what he had of a family.
This is the Robin who grew up to be a Nightwing who was still so violent and angry but in a different way.
Clark swallowed. “Ya, ya. Yep. Of course-“
Dick pulls back and takes threes steps away from Clark. He smiles innocently, like he didn’t do what he just did. “What are you making? Smells good.”
“I- well- uh-“ Clark blinks. “Pancakes.”
“Add chocolate chips, Tim will love them.”
Clark nods and stares at the unblinking first Robin.
“Ok.”
Tim
Tim was… magnificent.
Magnificent and brilliant.
Clark, although technically not Tim’s parent, still had that parent pride you get for children. (He gets that for all of Bruce’s children.)
“So, you’re dating Bruce huh.”
Nodding, Clark grins. “Yes.” It then flatters. “Does this bother you? I know Bruce never actually dated dated before-“
Tim rolls his eyes and gets into Clark’s personal space and stares.
Just stares without blinking.
Tim, who was once a child who helped Bruce grow out of his depression of loosing his second.
Tim who was so damn talented with computers he hacked Clark’s ship for information for Bruce was Bruce could only get in the very edges of the information plated there.
Tim who was an absolute beast when it comes down to it.
“Uh… Tim?”
“Hmm…” Something in Tim’s eyes shift. “Hurt him and I’ll personally cut you open and do unspeakable experiments on the alien who dared break my dad’s heart.”
And really, Tim scared the absolute shit out of Clark. Always has.
“Yes- yes- of course- I never doubt- I never would-“
Tim grins once more, backing away. “So, there’s this movie coming out I think you would like, wanna go see it?”
“I-“ Clark only nods.
Duke
“Oh, hello Duke-“ Clark begins, smiling softly at the newest family member. Duke, although only being here for about a year and a half, has landed in Clark’s heart that belongs to the Robins and the Robins only.
Duke was a beautiful child, turning man.
He had the kindest smile and even kinder words.
He was Bruce’s first to be taken in at such a large age, but still one of Bruce’s babies.
“I’ll skip the pleasantries.”
Clark pauses form where he was taking his shoes off. “Oh,”
Duke looks him up and down then glared. “You and Bruce huh?”
Shifting on his feet, one shoed and one not, Clark nods. “Yep. Couldn’t be happier-“
“I haven’t been with him nearly as long as the others, especially by age, but Bruce has turned into a type of second father for me.”
Clark nods. “Yes, I know-“
A green light comes from Duke’s palm and Clark feels the itch of something very familiar. “Hurt my dad and I’ll fuck you up.”
“Yep, heard loud and clear-“
“Good.” Duke’s eyes glare for a moment longer before he relaxes and smiles at Clark. “Anywho, Bruce is waiting for you in his office! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t.”
Clark gulps.
Cass
Clark adored Cass.
She was so… something Clark couldn’t describe. She just was amazing, in every way of the word and more.
Cass was Bruce’s first girl, his little princess.
Cass was the one who was hurt so deeply that she should have had a different ending, but she crawled out of it and became something more.
Something to look up at.
And she terrifies him.
You hurt my dad and I’ll kill you, Kent
Short and sweet, just like her.
She signed to him after catching him in the hallway at 2am because Clark was spending the night and he had to pee.
Clark wonders back to the bed room and asks Bruce, sheepishly, is he could borrow a pair of shorts.
Damian
Now Damian, oh tiny but loud Damian, was the one who scared Clark from day one.
Not for the reasons you think, no.
It was because this tiny little baby was hurt so badly growing up because his mother was unable to protect him as much as she wished she could and he thought he deserved it.
Damian who scratched and bite.
Damian who made Bruce have heart attack after heart attack.
So, when Damian cornered Clark one day, Clark couldn’t help but admire the little boy who is slowly turning into a strong man.
“Hurt my baba and I’ll make you wish you died on the planet you came from.”
Clark would have laughed if he didn’t think it was true.
Steph
Steph was an interesting case.
Not Bruce’s, but Bruce’s nonetheless.
“Hello Stephanie. I’m making apple pie for dessert tonight. I know you don’t like apple though. Would you like me to make you something else-“
Steph gives him a long stare. “You know, Bruce and I have a strange relationship.”
“… Yes.”
She nods. “Well, despite this, he’s still an important part to me. Hurt him and you make a lifelong enemy.”
Clark nods, trying to ignore the way his hand shakes from needing the dough. “I know.”
“I would like chocolate something, please.”
“Of course.”
Jason
Someone is following Clark.
They had been following him for blocks now, but Clark can’t pin point them.
He finally makes it to his apartment, shutting the door shut, heart pumping. He breaths deeply and stands up straight, chuckling to himself for being so foolish.
Someone was probably just walking in the same direction as him consequently.
“Clark Kent. Grew up on a farm. Crash landed on Earth… an alien.”
Spinning on his heel, Clark’s eyes widened at Jason standing in the middle of his living room.
“Oh- hello Jason. Did you need something-“
“Cut the crap.”
Clark takes in a long breath.
This was… Jason.
Jason was the one who died and came back, broken and ready to do things that shouldn’t be spoken of.
Jason who grew up in the streets because he father was doing illegal things and got caught and his mother overdosed.
Jason who was the first the make Bruce realize he wasn’t just a guardian, but a father.
Jason who made Bruce and Dick reconnect and become fatherandson once again during their biggest argument.
“I know.” Clark says before Jason could even open his mouth.
“Do you?”
Clark takes a long look at the man who never really had the chance to be a child. He looks at the man who, despite being the second eldest, looked like he was the youngest out of all of Bruce’s children. “I know if I hurt your father I will have some serious problems later.”
Jason stares back.
“Don’t fuck this up.”
“I won’t.”
Jason leaves the way he came.
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p1nkshield · 1 year
Text
Part two of the prompt written by phantom-dc
I hope you enjoy!
Jason carefully picked up the core after Bruce left and looked over it, inspecting each and every inch.
“Thank you”
“So you can speak!” Jason said incredulously.
“Takes a lot” a small barely audible reply entered Jason’s mind. “But I will heal eventually.”
“Then rest up kid, only let me know if there’s something you need okay?”
“Okay”
Jason stayed in the manor carrying around this stone they got from patrol a few weeks ago. If he was not holding it was sitting on something soft within his reach and line of sight. His family grew more and more concerned as the weeks went by.
Tim began to preface the goals of the family meeting regarding Jason’s behavior.
“Okay it is clear to everyone here that ever since Jason got that weird rock on patrol he’s been acting different. I thought we could all corroborate our experiences”
Damian piped up “I saw him speaking to it as if it responded to him. He spoke to it and waited in turn” Damian then took some time to consider his words. “He then looked at me quizzically as if I were acting strange.”
Alfred then spoke as his brows knit together “I saw young master Jason with the old children’s book titled Mog’s birthday. I thought perhaps he was enjoying it for the sake of nostalgia as I used to read it to him when he was a child. I soon found myself mistaken. He was reading it aloud to this ‘core’”
“Has anyone noticed that when we discussed the organization behind this attack Jason just gets up and leaves?” Tim questioned
Dick nodded along with everyone “One more thing. He was singing to it. I haven’t heard him sing since…”
The rest went unsaid. Bruce needed to confront him. Perhaps this power source was more than he realized. If he had led his son to being mind controlled after everything that happened to him he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself. He had to get to the bottom of this quickly.
Jason made his way to the dinner table chatting idly with the core in tow.
“Hey kid, one thing to know about Alfred is that he’s the coolest guy you’ll ever meet, he was the one who got me into some of my favorite hobbies.”
“And my old man, usually is such a pain in the… uhh yeah, he never really trusts me with important things off the battlefield until he trusted me with you.”
A light laugh floated up from the core “I’m important?”
“Of course you are, you’re a kid! I may be a scary gunslinger but I still want to protect the innocent”
The core spoke again, this time softer.
“Thank you”
“You’re welcome. You’ve been rather talkative today do you feel any better?”
“Yes! I might be able to”
“Jason, please sit down.” Bruce called out to him
Jason sat down a little annoyed since Bruce interrupted the child. looking at all the worried faces cooled his anger as Bruce began to speak.
“Jason have you noticed that your behavior has been significantly different as of late?”
“I mean yea but”
Before Jason could finish his sentence the core glowed with ice blue light and floated out of his reach.
“KID?!? TALK TO ME WHATS GOING ON?”
His answer came in a white haired glowing little boy in a black and white hazmat suit falling towards the ground, whom Jason caught easily.
This family of crime fighting detectives had never looked so surprised. Dick dropped his forkful of spaghetti onto his lap as he stared.
“What? I thought you knew!”
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thealtoduck · 9 months
Text
I Want It, I Got It
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Batfamily x BatCat!Bro!Reader
Warnings: BatCat!Bro being a problem child…
BatCat!Bro Masterlist
Summary: Batfam is realising a bunch of their stuff are missing and then remember the son of one of the worlds greatest theives lives with them…
——
”Has anyone seen my headphones” Jason asked as he came down to the living room, looking around for them. The others hadn’t seen them and helped Jason look, a while later you came downstairs seeing the others searching for something.
”What’s up?” you asked casually.
”We’re looking for-…… Y/n are those my headphones around your neck?” Jason asked in silent anger. ”Maybe” you answered innocently. Dick then glanced over at you and exclaimed ”Hey! That’s my hoodie!”. Tim then noted ”And those are my shoes!”.
”Y/n, have you been stealing their stuff?” Cassandra asked. ”Uhmmm…” you started and then turned around and sprinted away. ”Get him!” Jason yelled and him and the others started chasing you.
They did catch you eventually but you put up a good fight. It took 3 people to carry you down to the couch for an interregation. They put you down on it and surrounded you. ”Wanna explain why you’ve been taking our stuff?” Tim asked.
”Because i wanted it….” you answered as if it was obvious. Dick then questioned ”Really? Didn’t anybody ever teach you that stealing is wrong”. They all then noted your blank facial expression making everybody immediately realise the answer, with Jason stating ”Oh my god, no one ever taught him that stealing was wrong”.
”Oh yeah, right, son of Gotham’s biggest klepto” Tim stated. ”Y/n, what did your mom teach you about stealing?” Dick asked softly. ”Don’t be a pussy, just take it” Y/n quoted making the others look at each other and Dick then instructed ”Okay, so forget what your mom taught you and start by telling us what more you’ve taken”.
”It’d be easier to just show you my stash” you said standing up. ”You’ve got a stash?” Tim questioned as you lead them through the manor. You took them to your room and opened your closet revealing a pile of your siblings stuff.
”How come Alfred hasn’t noticed this while cleaning?” Cassandra asked. ”He knows, but he says having a hobby is good” you answered casually. ”Y/n, you don’t have to steal our stuff you can just ask us when you want to borrow it whenever you want” Dick explained with a smile.
”Okay” you said understandingly and then pointed at the pile asking ”In that case, can i borrow all of this for the rest of my life?”. Your older siblings looked at each other with a puzzled expression. ”Goddamnit Dick, now he has us cornered” Jason said frustrated.
Bonus:
”So, how come you didn’t take anything from Damian” Cassandra asked curiously.
”Come on, steal from Damian?… I don’t want to get murdered” you explained.
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Text
I'm obsessive over my Constantine Jr Au (which still needs a fic name for, I'm open to suggestions) because
this is a cranky danny. he's spent years fighting with no end in sight, with parents who he can't trust and his only companions never truly understanding what he's going through.
he vapes CBD for the pain he's constantly in. he drank alco/hol once to help him sleep, but his parents smelt it on his breath and, just like with their research, took that to believe EVERYTHING they'd ever suspected about danny to be true: that he drinks, he does dru/gs, he's in a gang. the only thing they've never suspected their son of--being a ghost--is the one thing he actually does.
then, right on the cusp of eighteen and freedom, he gets outed. AND transformed into a seven-year-old.
this is not a danny who is willing to play at being a child. and if anyone tries to, they're in for a foul time.
Danny was 17, transformed into a 7 year old and hides in Bludhaven, and is 8 when the police finally figure out that, hey, this weird kid who keeps altering us to crime scenes is usually right on the money about who the killer is, we should investigate that. Officer Grayson is on the case!
And discovers that he absolutely can't STAND this kid.
He thought he liked kids! Everyone thought he liked kids! but this kid...
This isn't called the Constantine Jr AU because Danny is a supernatural detective, or because Danny might be Constantine's kid. Its because Danny is an unrepentant little bas/tard and he makes it everyone's problem.
Danny vapes and blows bubblegum smoke in Grayson's face.
He takes out a flask and Grayson's grabs it, learning its full of orange juice. Danny then takes out a second flask, this one with vod/ka.
He wears a trenchcoat he found in the trash (the same trenchcoat Nightwing wears in DC vs Vampires, if you know you know) but the end and the sleeves are cut off for his hands and legs. the pockets are roughly around his knees.
Grayson is desperate to figure out more about this kid, but he doesn't go to batman because, time-line wise, this is right before red hood starts running around. Jason is dead/alive-in-hiding, Tim is Robin, and Dick is mad about it. (ages-- Bruce: ? Nightwing: 24 Jason: 19 Tim: 15 Danny: 8 Damien: 7-8)
he doesn't really bond with the kid until they're both kidnapped by a gang for hostages, and Danny's big kid emotions get a hold of him (he thought he could escape them bc he's an adult, he's gone through worse, but nope! child brain chemistry). Grayson is worried that he's hurt and in pain, but Danny confesses that he's always in pain. he has nerve damage all over his body, and the only thing he really trusts is CBD. He feels like shit for taking his juul away, but more importantly, because he's been treating Danny like a irritant and just a little kid.
they get rescued and Grayson tries to take him back to his home, but Danny reveals he's homeless, saying something like "I sleep where it suits me, just drop me off whereever."
Absolutely not, Grayson is taking kid back to his place for a bed, food, and a shower, in whatever order the kid wants.
Danny stays semi-perminantly at his apartment, but Nightwing tries not to push it, because this kid practically screams flight risk. unfortunately, the paparazzi have nothing better to do and snap a pick of Grayson and Danny getting dinner together, speculating that Dick's taken after Bruce
Danny doesn't care too much; I think his ghost form is the same, if glitchy, so his parents don't know about the deaging. Grayson is mildly panicking, but its not like he HASN'T been considering adopting the evil troglodyte. Even Bruce, Tim, and Alfred aren't the problem.
No, the problem is the Red Hood, a crime boss who just cut 8 people's heads off, seeing what looks like Nightwing pulling an innocent kid into the neverending fight against crime and Seeing Green.
Edit: Had to censor sh!t because ths wasn't showing up in the tags
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morallyinept · 2 months
Text
Rockford & Roses - A Detective Tim Rockford One Shot 🌹
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Summary: Tim's coming home to you on Valentine's night with a heavy heart and secrets that threaten to tear you apart. Can your love for him survive the ghosts of his past that still haunt him? More importantly, are you willing to make room for them in your already strained marriage?
Pairing: Det. Tim Rockford x Wife!Reader (No name or physical description of reader. It’s you, bub.)
Word Count: 5k-ish
Scoville Smut Rating: None, it's fluff. Mostly angst. Definite angst. You're safe. Kinda.
Check out my Scoville Smut Ratings here.
Warnings/Triggers: Alludes to smut, nothing detailed/mentions details of a case involving the murder of a child, nothing too graphic/alcoholism/A N G S T in abundance/some dark themes in the sense that Tim is self-destructing. Tim is very a broken man, poor lamb. Give him a hug, will you?
I write for me, and I share with you. If this story isn't to your taste, that's fine. Just slip quietly out the back door. No need to make a fuss. It's just a work of fiction.
Author’s Note: This story evolved massively from the direction it was going in originally, and I'm actually kinda pleased about that... It's something different from your typical, "schmoozy" Valentine's Day story, but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless.🌹
MAIN MASTERLIST | TIM ROCKFORD MASTERLIST | FLORA & FAUNA MASTERLIST
Enjoy! 🖤
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Detective Tim Rockford had been sober for almost a year when it all fell apart completely on that terrible night. 
But it wasn’t until the winter was in its latter stages, that he would tip fully over the edge into regular, almost daily, bouts of oblivion to keep himself from falling off the ledge completely.
To keep the nightmares and sense of guilt that he drowned in on a near constant basis at bay. 
He unscrews the cap from the bottle of dark amber liquid he’s craftily been hiding under the seat in his car, and swallows it all back letting it slip down his throat.
Without him giving it permission to, his mind replays over the events from that fateful night, four years ago, and is brought back to the little girl lying at the bottom of the ravine just off of the ridge. 
A call had come in about a missing child on the morning in question, and he and his partner Peter ‘Petey’ Harman went over to the home of the parents to talk to them about it. You know, do the initial questioning; worker bee stuff. Try to suss out if she was a regular runaway or if in fact one of them had stuffed her under the foundations and was crying wolf.
The family home was nice; an average run-of-the-mill house, in an average run-of-the-mill neighbourhood. Tim was presented with a photo of her from her mother and he remembered thinking that he’d missed his chance to be a father, to watch your belly swell and witness the miracle of life forged from your love, and it left a bitter taste. 
She was cute as a button; all brown hair and freckles, and she had this blue, silk princess-dress, with lace collars and cuffs, wearing a gonky smile that was missing a tooth or three. 
‘Find my baby, please Tim.’ Her mother had begged him whilst Harman took down the notes - he was good with that stuff - and Tim promised her that he would - knowing that a detective should never promise that - if it was the last thing he ever did. Not knowing that he would actually make good on that word further down the line. 
Looking again at the picture, he learned it was her favourite dress, her mother had said it through the red eyes that she wore that pretty dress everywhere, and that she turned into the spawn of Satan himself when she tried to get her out of it so it could be cleaned.
It was also the same dress Tim had found her wearing when he discovered her remains.
The search had been dragged out as much as it could be, but there was no trace of her. Leads had been exhausted; those pulled in for questioning were found innocent and their alibis solid.
It was as if Rainie Thompson had vanished off the surface of the planet in a click of a finger.
The search efforts began to die off around the four week point, mostly due to the heavy snow settling in and it pained him to know that everyone was giving up on finding this little girl - a little girl that he was convinced was still alive - she just had to be; he could feel it in his gut.
Some perverted bastard had her and he was determined to make them feed from a tube for their rest of their life when he found them.
Tim was determined to find her, despite his colleagues and even Harman at times, convincing him it was a lost cause. He’d been spending most of his time - including down time - combing the woods, the parks - everywhere and anywhere he could think to try and find her.
Where are you, baby? She consumed him wholly.
She was what kept your husband away from you.
Left you sat at the dining table alone, with an uneaten plate opposite you and a creeping draft settling into your bones. The creaky sounds of the house seemed louder when you were alone, and soon they were your only companion; their creaks soon turning into words of comfort at an absent husband.
Tim left the space in the bed vacant, crease-free and cold beside you. 
Tim’s whole world had come tumbling down when he’d picked Rainie up and cradled her small, cold body to his chest and wailed like he had lost his own beau.
No, baby... no.
He cursed up to the sky, as though having it out with God himself - God, who had allowed this innocent, beautiful child to die.
Tim wasn’t exactly devout or the God-fearing type. He’d been to church only a handful of times in his life; to marry you being the most notable, but after that day he’d especially not been back to a church since.
This is how faith dies in a person; violated and fractured. Altered and hollowed out from the inside and everything pure and good is obliterated by the poisoning fingers of the darkness in the world, wrapping their hands tightly around its neck and simply snapping it in two.
Fuck you, God! Damn you, you son of a bitch! 
She had been thrown down in there like a puppet whose strings had become entangled with themselves; she was six-years-old.
Rainie Thompson was six-years-old and she had a little, blue dress and played Hopscotch and liked drawing pictures of red roses, and eating chocolate ice-cream until her tummy hurt.
Rainie Thompson was the one who killed him. 
Tim cried through the drinking, mourning her like his own and mourning the part of him that was dying with her; a hollow husk of a man soon to be filled by the familiar numbing void that alcohol had to offer.
It would make him forget the horror; forget the depravity, although the nightmares would never relent, he would be certain of that - they never do. 
To date, he hasn’t found the killer and it’s been four years. A one-off, grisly murder that hinted at possible cannibalism, but later was discovered she’d been partly eaten by a wild animal scavenging; it left very little in the way of clues or evidence, because there was very little of her left.
Most of his team concluded it absolutely was an animal of some kind, a cougar happened upon her perhaps, or a bear after she'd wandered off? But Tim did not quite believe that - they didn’t see her. 
It’s changed him, changed something within Tim to see the world for what it is. The band-aid has been ripped off and once you see that shit, you can never unsee it again.
And Tim's seen some pretty fucked up shit in his career.
He closed up, closed off and began unknowingly cementing the spiralling destruction that was to be his life. He’s fifty-eight and has nothing anymore.
Well, that’s not entirely true, he has you.
Despite the distance that has grown between you, evolving from carnal desire to ships passing silently in the night, you remain steadfast in your love for Tim, silently supporting him as he battles the demons that threaten to consume him wholly.
Yet he can’t help but feel that he's condemned you already in some ways. Watching as those demons hold you down and tear pieces from you until, one day, they'll be nothing left. 
The wife of a gritty detective doesn't bode well in a happily ever after.
His decades long career is the reluctant third wheel in your marriage, and at first you admired his dedication; his passion to solving mysteries. Getting excited yourself when he'd use the dining room walls to gather his thought maps, pinning up mug shots, red thread lines linking people and place and circumstance. Weapons of choice like an elaborate game of Clue.
And he'd talk to you about them in those early days, the tamer cases he had. Mugs of coffee and thoughtful kisses exchanged as you offered your opinion and challenged his thinking.
Now it's getting harder not to resent that damn gold badge.
He swigs again at the bottle. It feels good; the warm, numbing sensation flooding through his veins down both his arms and legs. The giddy onslaught of amnesia begins to twinkle around the edges of alert thinking as he slowly succumbs to the light buzz.
He closes his eyes and lets himself teeter on the edge of it, welcoming the calmness like an old friend. 
His first heavy session had led to his first blackout and it had scared him; scared him that he could lose a chunk of time that was unaccounted for out of his life - waking up at home fully clothed in the armchair, sometimes the kitchen floor, knowing he'd driven severely under the influence, and equally amazed and relieved that he hadn’t killed anybody in the process. They would take his badge for that recklessness if they knew. 
No-one knew. Or if they did, they never mentioned it.
But it wasn’t enough to stop him. It got him through the paralysing fear of handling those dark days, which were particularly brutal, and the other fucked up cases he’d had to solve since.
They tell you; tell you that it will be difficult and bad, but you’re never prepared for it.
His father never prepared him for that shit and was right when he said he hadn’t got the cajones to be a police officer all those years ago.
His father headed up the ranks of Chief in a suburban precinct elsewhere and eventually made Commander, like Tim knew he would, probably just to spite him. He also told Tim in no uncertain terms that he wasn’t "Commander material." Hell, he wasn’t even Detective’s material, and for a while, Tim believed sincerely that he was right.
Although, he’s six feet under now, so what the Hell does he know? Shot in the back during a supermarket raid gone awry when he’d popped out to buy a newspaper and a some smokes. Commander John Rockford shot by a drugged up lil’ pipsqueak looking to get cash for his next score - what a legacy! 
His death left a nice, fat pension for his mother who squandered most of it on a gambling addiction that she’d always had looming in the background of his childhood; the root of many a ferocious argument witnessed between his parents when they thought he was tucked up in bed, and he could literally hear the punch from his father’s fist make contact with his mother’s jaw.
But that didn’t stop the fact that his words clung to Tim like a bad shadow most days, even now, long after his theatrical send off like he was a Goddamned hero or something. He wasn’t; he was a mean little asshole with a bad temper and Tim had been glad to see the back of him, too sloshed to remember much of the funeral at all and cutting his no good mother out of his life soon after. 
Tim swigs from the bottle once more, the sting dying out slowly and melting into an alkaline that soon tastes of nothing. It’s all nothing; emptiness and voids that are getting harder to fill. Disassociating himself from his shitty past life; from his first wife and her erratic behaviour, which took him years to figure out, was probably his erratic behaviour that had pushed her away and out of their home for good, not that he’d truly cared to notice.
Work all but consumed him. And he was happy to let it.
Of course, he’d gone to AA; out of town where nobody would know who he was - an upstanding pillar of the community, yeah right - talking about your problems, laying them all out there in front of a bunch of strangers who were just as fucked up as you were, was difficult because, up until that point Tim had never recognised or considered that he had a problem; just a mechanism he relied upon that helped him cope. 
Having to take a moral inventory of himself and dig into the suppressed emotions he was hanging onto, and using them as an excuse to inebriate himself through the day, was hard.
The hardest thing he'd ever done, doubting he was strong enough to climb those twelve steps - and he wasn’t even really sure that he wanted to.
But he did; was sober for a while, until Rainie Thompson obliterated him.
He takes another quick swig after spotting Harman coming out the Gas n’ Guzzle and shoves it back under the seat covertly.
Harman finds Tim sitting as he left him, squeezing the steering wheel inside of his deft hands, over and over, trying to make sense of everything and when exactly the world had become such a terrible and unforgiving place - but is coming up short. 
Gas stations are the most uninspiring places to get a decent cuisine that won’t make you shit ten tons the next day, but it's late; Detective Petey Harman is tired and hungry for just about anything right now, no matter how crappy it would taste or make him feel in twelve hours’ time as it burns through its exit out of his anal passage.
Once back inside the car, Tim scrutinises the large brown paper bag filled to the brim that Petey rifles around in, before pulling out a dire looking sandwich and handing it to his senior. 
“You planning a sleepover with your girly friends or summin’?” Tim questions him.
There are several boxes of microwave pizzas, a bag of extra-large puffy marshmallows, various microwaveable meats in packet sauces that look questionable in their paleness, a jar of chocolate dipping spread and a large bottle of orange and pineapple Cactus Cooler. 
“Nah... No girly friends for me.” Petey says, sombrely. “Weekly shop.”
“Well, watch your damned cholesterol.” Tim tears into the plastic packaging to be met with disappointment the moment he puts the sandwich in his mouth. 
Petey can smell the waft of alcohol lingering in the car but he doesn’t mention it. Just like all the other times he's smelt it coming out of Tim’s mouth when he speaks, making his eyes water.
Petey was not long into being a newbie; a junior ranking officer in the department and up until a year ago or so now, had been making pretty good at busting low-level criminals successfully, to the point that he hadn’t really taken the gig that seriously, thinking at times he was invincible.
So much so that he had his thumbs in his belt loops and his shooter on show proudly like they do in Miami Vice as he and his reluctant mentor Tim, solved bleak mysteries together.
They’d stopped in for a burger break at Lafferty’s Grill on the day of Rainie being reported missing; talking about the pretty waitress giving Petey a lingering smile, and Tim trying to persuade him that he actually had a pair of balls and should use them to go and talk to her.
Instead, Tim was mirthed with disappointment as Petey's cheeks flushed a crimson red as he stared into his laminated menu, tacky with barbecue sauce residue, and tucking said balls firmly inside himself.
Petey had to grow up fast; he knew that the moment he’d heard Tim yelling at him crazily when he’d found the child’s remains whilst they scouted around for her aimlessly one night after Tim was trying for weeks to hold it together.
It was an image that still gave Petey nightmares, and the sounds of Tim sobbing still made his blood run cold when he thought about it, but it was far less frequent now.
He’d been promoted since to Detective, taking the job more seriously and knuckling down; his life coming up roses whilst Tim’s fell out the bottom of his ass. 
Speaking of roses, Tim looks up mid-chew on something that the label assures him is tuna fish, and spots something red and velvety clustered in the window of the gas station.
He spies the date on the radio and sighs out heavily, tossing the sandwich back in the plastic packaging. 
“Shit.” He mutters. 
“You good? I got a BLT if you want that instead?” Petey asks. 
"No. Fuck no. Wait, you gave me the shitty tuna when you had bacon?" Tim frowns.
"Was gonna save it."
With that, Tim exits the car, the driver side door squeaking on his beaten Pontiac and his trench coat billowing in the wind as he makes his way inside the gas station.
The fluorescent lights flicker overhead, casting a harsh glare over the rows of snacks and drinks lining the shelves. His weary eyes fall upon the sad display of the florals. A few wilted roses, their once vibrant petals drooping with neglect, sitting haphazardly in a cheap plastic bucket.
Tim grimaces, knowing they’re far from the bouquet you deserve. 
His mind flashes back to the drawings of roses on Rainie Thompson's bedroom wall and how, for a time, they engulfed him, tracing his fingers over the waxy ridges of their messy circles.
Tim was sitting on her bed, clutching a stuffed bear with a plaid neckerchief that smelled of talc and her mother informed him the bear's name: Tim. Or Timmy. Timmy the Teddy.
He remembers squeezing that damn bear tightly as he took in the surroundings of the little girl's room, trying to work out where she was - where are you, baby? - When he spotted the drawings.
He kept one, pulling it off the wall and folding it neatly into squares until it fit in his wallet. A reminder that she would be with him, crying in his ear for him to bring her back home to her mommy and daddy.
She never stopped crying and wailing in his ear; the pitch growing until he drowned it out with the booze.
He remembers the pictures, full of clumsy scribbles, bulbs of red crayon petals and skinny green stalks. Kind of how the roses look now in the bucket staring out at him; a sad little gift from beyond the grave in their macabre despair. 
He hears it again now, that crying, right beside him. He squeezes his eyes shut, a few moments of forcing it into white noise.
With a resigned sigh, he plucks a handful of the least wilted roses from the bucket and makes his way to the counter. The clerk eyes him curiously as Tim approaches, a knowing smirk playing at the corners of their lips.
Tim ignores the silent judgement, focusing instead on paying for the flowers and grabbing a bottle of wine from the shelf by the counter. The wine selection is vastly limited, but he purchases a bottle of red without giving it much thought and hoping it won't taste like sharp vinegar.
He pays for his thoughtlessness, and hurries back to his car, the weight of his guilt and exhaustion pressing down on him like crushing lead.
“Get out,” he gruffs to Petey as he starts the engine. 
Petey gulps down his sandwich with a splutter. “What?”
“You’re walkin’ home tonight.” Tim announces with eyebrows knitted, and Petey rolls his eyes, fumbling with his shopping and splitting the bag in the process. 
"Aww man. You're kidding me?"
"I gotta get home. You didn't tell me it was fuckin' Valentine's." Tim scowls.
"Big deal. It's just another day." And Tim can hear the bitterness of being single and alone awash in Petey's mouth with stale bread, lettuce and bacon.
"Out." Tim presses.
“Roses won’t cut it this time, Tim.” Petey whines, as Tim reverses before he can even shut the door. 
He’s right. Despite his bumbling ineptitude, Petey’s right - it won’t cut it.
Tim can’t even believe the sight of the wilted roses sitting on the passenger seat, mocking him and reminding him of all of his failings to you. It wasn't always like this, he's sure of it. Somewhere in the recesses of his tempestuous mind, he knows you were happy; he made you happy at some point, right?
He remembers how happy you were when you exchanged vows and gold bands, gorgeous in your little lace smock dress, beaming up at him. Fuck, it seems like a lifetime ago.
Burgers and beers on the bonnet of his car, he had a chevy back then, and watching breathtaking sunsets, and going to the movies when he was off duty.
He would bring you roses then. Fluffy, sumptuous blooms that almost guaranteed him a bigger helping of your cherry pie with the perfect, sweet crust, and extra kisses that led to him detaining you in the sheets, reminding you that you had the right to remain loud, to scream his name when he made you come.
He brought you real roses back then. Not these... weeds.
It’s late, almost midnight which ironically, is the earliest Tim has been home in a long time.
With a deep breath, he gathers the roses in his arms and makes his way to the front door. As he pushes it open and steps into the warmth of your shared home, the scent of your perfume catches his nose making it twitch.
He remembers that scent, like a sucker punch to the jaw. As he inhales deeply, the memories come flooding back, transporting him to a time when life was simpler, when the weight of the world hadn't yet settled upon his broad shoulders.
He can almost feel the warmth of your hand in his, your laughter echoing in his ears like sheet music. The feel of his cock inside your wet tightness as he fucked you into the mattress and you clawed at the expanse of his back leaving red welts on his skin from your nails for days after.
You couldn't get enough of each other once, and now you're barely strangers.
He steps into the deep bellows of the house searching for you, and finds you on the couch, wiping frantically at swollen eyes that have obviously been crying.
And the guilt drowns him instantly, crushing him like a tsunami as he sees you there, small and withered, worse than the roses he dared to bring home to you.
Looking down at them and frowning, Tim is disgusted with himself. He tosses them onto the table wanting to be free of the wretched things.
He longs to spend time with you, his darling wife, but the relentless pursuit of justice consumes every waking moment, pollutes every free thinking thought.
You can only watch from afar as Tim pours himself into the work, and pours himself another glass to compensate for the scars it leaves.
You know he’s haunted by the very vestiges of unsolved cases stacking up on his desk that he never talks to you about anymore. Closes the files of grisly crime scene photos before you have a chance to see them.
He protects you from his work now, but consequently, and unwittingly, protects you from him, too. 
Each night, you would leave a warm meal on the table and wait anxiously for his return, hoping that he’ll come home early to eat with you, your heart heavy with worry and your hair turning whiter in the process.
More often than not, you dine with bitterness and disappointment.
Often, you’d wake in the early hours of the morning to find Tim slumped in his armchair, surrounded by case files; his brow furrowed in comatose concentration, glasses almost fully sliding off the bridge of his nose.
An empty bottle always rusticates beside him on the floor.
You can’t remember the last time Tim slept in your bed with you. The last time he held you in those strong, broad arms of his that you know he has hidden under that trench coat. 
You can't remember the last time Tim made love to you and whispered how beautiful you are in your ear with whimpering grunts as he filled you up. 
Tim is crestfallen as he steps forward, the faint glow of something flickering on the dining table pulls his sight.
A candle, close to being exhumed by the deathly kiss of its barely remaining wick, and unopened boxes of now cold Chinese take-out litter the table. 
“I ordered your favourite. Number seventy-three with a side of nineteen.” You sniff. "I got extra twenty-two because they always give us an odd number."
“Darling, I...” Tim stops, for he knows nothing he can say can absolve this. On the most romantic night of the year, Tim has failed you, yet again. “I’m so sorry-”
“Don’t, Tim” you raise your hand shaking your head despondently. “Just don’t.” 
"I didn't mean to be late. Not tonight.”
A small ghost of a smile evaporates on your lips. “You never mean to be late. Yet you always are.”
“The case-”
“It's not about the case, Tim," you say, your voice foggy with emotion. "It's about us. About the fact that you're always putting everything else before me."
He notes the roses again, bearing witness to his shame; their haggard state mocking him once more and he curses inwardly. 
“I’m so, so sorry,” he approaches as you stand, arms wrapping around yourself and glass cutting tracks down your cheeks. 
“I packed a bag…” You say as his eyes follow yours to a small suitcase in the hall that he didn’t even notice when he came in. passed right by it, oblivious. And he suddenly wonders what else he's been missing all these years, as it registers in his gut.
“No.” Tim states with a croak in his throat. He shakes his head vehemently. "No, darling."
Tim steps forward, the suitcase filling him with terrific dread. "You're leaving me?"
You're surprised that he's surprised.
But you shake your head, tears falling freely now. "I can't do this anymore, Tim," you say, your voice barely a whisper. "I can't keep waiting for you to come home to me. To open up to me and tell me what’s eating at you. I know it's something bad, something terrible. And I want to help, I do, I'm your wife. I want to make it better. But you make it so difficult. You push me away."
“To protect you.” He says with a low voice.
“Who's protecting you, Tim?"
"I don't-"
"I don't know who you are anymore. The man I fell in love with, he's... a ghost.”
“I…” words fail him as you look at him with a deep sadness that will stay etched on the thin fibre of his soul forever. A stain that won't wash out, no matter how much he scrubs.
You were the one. You're his one. And he's fucking losing you.
“Tell me, or I’m leaving... for good.” You warn. "If you ever cared about me at all, you'll tell me what's killing you. Please..."
You shake your head in despair, wiping your eyes harder now, when he doesn’t say anything. Just swallows the lumpy constriction in his throat and stares at you with hollow eyes.
"Goodbye, Tim." You sniffle.
“Rainie Thompson, she loved roses...” Tim mutters thickly as you approach the hall.
You stop, turning to face him.
"Who's Rainie Thompson?" You ask fearing the immediate worst.
You expect him to reveal to you that he's been unfaithful. That's he's not just been putting the hours in solely at work. That he brings roses - roses that are alive - to another woman. He eats her cherry pie now, fucks her into the mattress.
That he drinks because of the guilt of hurting you. But what he says instead alters a part of you that you don't think you'll ever get back.
“They look just how she drew them.” Tim says, his voice breaking, until his face caves in fully, features drowning in the onslaught of emotions, and for the first time you witness this unwavering man crumble completely. 
And it terrifies you. For if he, the strongest man you've ever known, can break like this, what hope is there for you?
You rush to him as he collapses to his knees with a heavy thud, and wraps his arms around your waist, sobbing into the softness of your tummy.
You shush him and stroke your fingers through the greying curls, matted with sweat at the back of his neck. He holds onto you tighter than he’s ever done and you're afraid to let go of him. 
Afraid that he won't ever stop bawling, as he mumbles incoherently and snottily into your abdomen.
Hours pass by, Valentine's Day gone in a blink of an eye, and you listen carefully and woefully as Tim recounts the haunting tale of Rainie Thompson, and how she's slowly killed the man you love.
You sit at the dining table with his thick, gun-calloused hands inside of yours, stroking over the ridges of his knuckles and listening to him swear to you that’ll get help with the drinking.
That he’ll take some leave and the two of you can go to the beach, or the lake, or somewhere where it can just be the two of you for a while.
Away from his cases, away from the horror of it all. Hell, he even mentions early retirement in his pertinent desperation, until you pat his hand gently and ground him with a stroking cup to his grizzled cheek.
You smile lightly as you gather the roses, and try to push aside your cynicism and wonder if you’ll regret not actually leaving tonight. Wonder if all what Tim has fed you is more empty promises when he'll eventually slip back into that expected monotony.
But you can see some swill of sincerity and regret inside the brown muddy pools of Tim’s tired eyes that you've never seen before.
He silently watches you pull the dead outer petals from the roses before placing them in a vase with fresh water. 
“They’re already dead.” He mutters apologetically to you, shaking his head at the sight of them. 
“Some things can come back to life, Tim, with some love.” You smile softly and Tim wants to just die in your arms right now. 
“I don’t deserve you, darling.” Tim says, reaching for you.
He hasn’t yet taken off his trench, and you help it from his shoulders, the smell of worn leather from his holsters greeting you this close.
You've forgotten what he smells like as you inhale deeply. The scent of the leather leads a rugged and slightly musky undertone to his familiar aroma that’s swilled with coffee, cedarwood and sweat underscoring the gritty, primal edge to him. 
You lick your lips as you graze your nose against the warmth of his neck, allowing him to finally crush you close to his broad chest, before the handle of his gun digs you uncomfortably in the breast.
He braces to kiss you, sweeping his lips delicately against yours, but you flinch. A reaction that slashes at Tim’s gut.
“Just hold me tonight, Tim.” You plead to him.
He nods, a solemn heaviness in his eyes as well as on his shoulders. 
“I’ve missed you so much.” He admits.
Hearing him say it offers some vindication, but you know that these wounds need layers of bandages to be changed daily, and not some flimsy band-aids.
"I've missed you too."
“I’m so sorry for pushing you out. I don’t wanna lose you. I can’t. I’ll do whatever it takes. I promise.” He takes your hand and presses it to his mouth, the soft scruff of his facial hair feeling like gossamer, and you'd almost forgotten the feel of that too. “I love you.”
And when he says it, your emotions hiccup out of you and the tears fall again. 
“I love you, Tim,” you whimper. 
He takes you in his arms, those big, strong arms, and leads you upstairs to bed where he makes good on his word and doesn't let go of you all night.
You fall asleep listening to the steady thrum of his heartbeat as he rubs your back gently, soothing you into sleep whilst he stays awake well into the night, staring up at the ceiling and trying not to listen to the dark thoughts urging him to finish that whole bottle of cheap wine downstairs. 
He came so close to losing you today, on Valentine’s Day of all days, and he knows he has to do better. For all his faults, you love him and he spends the night pondering on that. Pondering when it was that he last slept in the bed with you, until his eyes fall heavy and he succumbs to a short, stunted sleep.
In the morning, he rises, stiff and aching from laying in the same position all night with you curled tightly in his arms. Amidst his back cracking and feeling stuffy in his slept-in crumpled button up and vest, Tim silently leaves the bedroom, careful not to wake you.
After pissing for what feels like an age, Tim catches sight of his face in the vanity mirror. White-gray stubble spreads across his chin and top lip, and the weary look of a man of the law that’s seen too much and knows too much weighing heavy around his sullen eyes, greets him.
He rummages in the vanity for some Tylenol and pops two in his mouth, swallowing them down without water. He re-shapes his oil slicked hair and tries to avoid the face looking back at him.
It knows all his terrible secrets, and now, so do you. 
In the beginning the alcohol wouldn’t let him remember all the details, but its dropped its guard. The dreams were real; too real and he would find himself reliving the events each time he tried to get some damn shut eye.
He wasn’t supposed to keep seeing these things or to remember - it wasn’t part of the deal. Inebriation was supposed to wipe that shit out, but it'd failed to serve its purpose, instead serving as a beguiling wedge that expanded between you and him. 
After descending the creaky stairs towards the kitchen, Tim passes the dining table en route to make some coffee; his tongue washing around dry, tight gums.
He spies his mobile and checks it out of habit; a message or two from Harman, one about a lead on one of their minor cases, and the other enquiring about his 'night of passion with the Mrs' and if it went well, and Tim simply scoffs. He makes a mental note to kick Harman when he sees him next. Preferably in the balls.
But out of the corner of his eye, Tim notices the vase of dead roses and stops to take in how they're now fully alive.
Overnight, their wilted petals have straightened and regained their vibrant colour, as if infused magically with a newfound vitality. The once drooping stems now stand tall and proud, their green leaves unfurling to reveal a lushness that seems to defy their previous state of neglect. Shades of crimson glow in the stale morning light, their hues deepening and intensifying the longer Tim takes them in.
Tim reaches for one, revelling in the soft velvet as he rubs it delicately between his finger and thumb. His eyes widen in disbelief at the transformation before him. It’s as if the flowers themselves are reaching out to him, a silent reminder of the resilience of your love and the power of forgiveness. 
Some things can come back to life, Tim, with some love.
And Tim swears in that moment he’s never loved you more.
He swallows back a choke as he glances the wedidng photo of you both on the wall. Fuck, you looked so happy and beautiful that day.
Feeling a new sense of budding rejuvenation settling into his tired bones, a tiny bud, but one still seeding nonetheless, he turns towards the kitchen and then freezes, feeling it as his blood runs cold over his skin.
Prickles shoot down the back of his neck as he hears the sound, as clear as day. But it's different this time.
The haunting, yet wonderfully brilliant sound, of a little girl playfully giggling beside him.
Rainie Thompson isn't crying in his ear anymore, and Tim Rockford can't help but smile, closing his eyes as he listens to that sweet melody.
I found you, baby.
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Thank you so much for reading. I'd love to know your thoughts and would appreciate a re-blog so others can enjoy this story too. Thank you! 🖤
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emo-batboy · 1 year
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thoughts on battinson with his like seven kids and they have to suffer through everyone wanting to fuck him cause have you seen him??
Alright so this response kinda works in a competely separate realm of canon than what I usually post. I’m gonna preface that right now, but BOY do I have thoughts :D
So when I think of Battinson and his (non)accidental orphan acquisition, I see Battinson as being on a much more even playing field emotionally than most other iterations. He’s not really as stoic and put-together, so having kids (especially multiple) would cause a LOT more chaos and drama. So in this case, I like to think that it happens at a very rapid rate. (Again, I’m saying this because this require straying from the film’s canon to a much larger degree than I usually do.) SO by the time he’s 32, he has an 11yo Dick, a 9yo Jason, and an 8yo Tim. And they probably grow with him much like teen parents do with their kids. He’s not as authoritative as most parents. Instead, he starts out as like half older brother, half dad, then graduates to the roll of batdad after his whole vengeance era.
THAT ALL BEING SAID!! BECAUSE THEY’RE SO MUCH OLDER AND BRUCE IS YOUNGER, THEY DEAL WITH A LOOOOTTTTTT OF CREEPY LADIES TRYING GO GET WITH THEIR DAD. (AND THEY ARE VERY. SMART. FOR THEIR AGE)
Dick, older brother and the leader of the “Save Dad and Our Childhood Innocence” brigade teaches the three everything there is to know. He is the most experienced with these awful public events like galas and charity auctions, so he is in control.
And it is SO much easier to get the creepy suitors to back off when they work as a team
Dick talks everyone’s ears off. He’s the golden boy (getting perfect grades and gold medals in his school’s gymnastics team) so he EASILY gets away with distracting people
Dick will insert himself into adult conversations all the time, and Bruce always lets him, which allows Jason and Tim to wreak havoc on whatever target they chose.
Whenever it isn’t too obvious or it’s late enough in the night, Jason will fake a cold or a headache sometimes (he’s prone to falling sick) and Bruce will insist that he take his kid home and tuck him into bed himself, very fatherly
Tim uses his Youngest Child points to woo the nicer ones and direct them away from Bruce, but it doesn’t usually works on the gold diggers (and thank god because Tim HATES acting cute) so he’ll use it on Bruce instead
When those three plans don’t work, the three gremlins start getting Creative TM
Jason, taking a swig from some wine glass and proceeding to spray it all over Vicky Vale’s white dress: “This isn’t grape juice!”
Tim, resident iPad kid and (despite popular belief) The Most Evil of the Three, sees some lady touching his batdad so he finds her phone number on an online directory and prank calls her every time she gets too close
Suitor: “Your father is very handsome.” Dick: “My father’s dead :(” “…” “Oh wait, you mean Bruce! Yeah, he’s nice.”
One lady starts hanging off of Bruce, but he needs to run off to say hello to an investor. Jason appears from nowhere in his dapper little tux and the lady just says, “So uhh, you like the Wiggles, right?” Jason: “Nope! Have you ever read Crime and Punishment? :)”
Dick “accidentally” slaps some obnoxious guests with his wild hand gestures “Oh no! I’m so sorry :(( Let me get you an ice pack” and pulls them away while the other two hide their laughter
One of the ladies who is WAY too comfortable and forward when flirting with Bruce is forced to sit down with Tim and he goes in head first “what are you doing with my dad?” “oh you know what adults do, honey. Messing around, having fun” and he’s like “well My dad doesn’t look interested” “of course he is! who knows? Maybe we’ll hit it off and make another one of you one day” which gives Tim intense psychic damage, but he’s a horrible little brat so he doesn’t give up. He hits her with the innocent doe eyes and asks in the cutest fucking voice “Where do babies come from?” she BOOKS IT (they never see her again)
Anyway, to answer your question: they are little terrors. and Bruce knows they’re little terrors, but he doesn’t care because he hates the creepy attention even more than they do, but this way it comes with a show :D
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