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ellaemerson2003 · 3 years

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What I Don’t Tell You

What I Don’t Tell You Ella-Jane Emerson October 20th, 2020. Hi, I’m Oakley Harlow and I’m only 17. I have selective mutism, also known as situational mutism. It’s an anxiety disorder where I physically cannot speak unless I am very relaxed and comfortable with whoever I’m with or where I am. Even when I am comfortable, I choose to not talk to people. Many people like me, with selective Mutism, stay silent even when the consequences of our silence include shame, social ostracism, or punishment. Certain trigger words and people could make me not talk for the rest of the day or even weeks sometimes. Instead of talking, I usually write books and poems to express my feelings. Sometimes I even sing and write songs, but I’ve only shared them with one person and one person only. Halston Bridger, my best friend. We met in 4th grade and have been friends ever since. Not gonna lie, he is my only friend. I know he has so many other friends and he brings them up all the time without noticing it, which to be honest, I don’t mind. Most of the time, Halston is very careful about what he says around me. Other times we end up laying in bed on the weekend while I listen to him telling me stories about his other friends. I only talk to three people. Olive, my older twin sister, Halston, my best friend, and my Mom, Autumn. I love them so much, even though I don’t say it much. Halston calls me Harley for no reason, I don’t mind it. I think it’s actually quite nice. I sat quietly in my cozy bed deciding to finish some lyrics I wrote. I grabbed my ukulele, leaning back on the headboard, softly singing to myself. This is my kind of Thursday night.

“Sorry I didn’t talk for a week, My eyes were awake, but my brain fell asleep. Woke up late for school and left my voice at home, I didn’t mean to leave you hanging there all alone. Sorry for leaving you on ‘read’ for the day, I didn’t know what else I could possibly say. I guess I’m not good with my vocabulary, I don’t want to ruin your first impression of me. I feel so exhausted, I feel like you take the words from my mouth and toss it. I don’t think I have much more to speak about, I’m honestly at a loss of words right now. Sorry, my brain never processed what you said, I was too busy wrapped up in my head. I feel so stupid, I know I have a voice, but I can’t use it. Don’t wanna seem eager, I gotta be cool, The last thing I want is to look like a fool.” I finished whisper-singing the lyrics to myself and sat the ukulele down beside my bed. I hadn’t finished it, but I just wanted to revise it. “That sounds great, Harley,” Halston said from my doorway. “Than-” I thought about whispering a full sentence but my mouth wouldn’t let me so I just nodded. Halston had taught me sign language so I could use that instead of truly using my voice. When did he get here? I thought to myself. ‘How did you get in here?’ I signed to him. “Ms. Autumn let me in.” He said, smiling as always. He plopped down on the bed and grabbed my ukulele, reaching over me. He gave me a questioning look as if he was asking to play it with his eyes and I nodded. He sat back and strummed the strings so… carelessly. He clearly did not know how to play the ukulele at all because it sounded screechy and discoordinated. I never talked much but I was gladly gifted with a nice singing voice, I couldn’t hit those fairly low notes but I knew how to nicely sing high notes in falsetto. Halston started singing Disney songs. I giggled at how silly he was and he cheered for himself. “I think I deserve a reward now, don’t you agree?” “Yes,” I said and giggled, comfortably. “How was school for you, today?” He asked. “Good.” I spoke, deciding to sign next, ‘How was yours?’ “It was boring. Stella keeps bothering me about prom but I don’t think I’m going to go.” ‘Why not? And who is Stella?’ I signed. “Well if you aren’t, then I’m going to stay with you. Stella is just an over-obsessed girl. Plus, we're going to a new school. So there'd be no point.” “Thanks,” I spoke quietly. I internally rolled my eyes at his over-obsessed comment. “Well, tomorrow is Friday, your plans?” “School.” I whispered under my breath, slightly raising my voice so he could hear me. “What about after?” “Nothing.” “Same, my Mom is making a big dinner tomorrow if your family wants to come over.” “Maybe.” “I’ll ask your Mom, okay?” I smiled at him and nodded gratefully. We had known each other for 8 years now and had always lived 2 houses away. Whenever I needed him, he’d be right there and vise-versa. “Dinner’s ready girls! Oops, and Halston!” My Mom, Autumn, yelled from the kitchen. We stood up and I flattened out my loose light-pink pajama shorts and plain white crop top. Halston had seen me in “revealing” clothes before. Which is only including crop-tops and pajama shorts that technically could pass for underwear. Nothing less. We walked down the stairs and I started fidgeting with my fingers, a natural reaction I had to almost anything. “Hello, kids.” Mom said with a bright smile. Olive walked out brushing her light brown hair which was identical to mine. Our hazel eyes were just like our Moms. We had never met our dad, especially since he was just a sperm donor. Olive and I had similar personalities, we both kept quiet most of the time. Except that if something needs to be said, Olive isn’t afraid to say it as where, when it comes to me, I’d stay quiet and only think about the number of things I could say. Olive and I also have the same mindset, so when we look at each other, you better know I’m telepathically telling her some crazy stuff to say. Halston and I were the same way, we look at each other and suddenly knew what the other was thinking. We could totally pass as triplets, except for the fact that Halston is a couple of inches taller than Olive and me. But people mistake us 3 for siblings all the time. Where others mistake either Olive or me as Halston’s girlfriend. Cue the gagging. Olive and I love Halton, we are all pretty close to each other but never have thought about loving each other in more than a platonic way. Mom had made some delicious mashed potatoes and chicken. I looked at Olive, telling her to communicate my words with Mom. “Oakley thinks your food is great, Mom.” Olive winked at me and I smiled at her in return. Halston added a few compliments about Mom’s outfit that made her blush and Olive rolled her eyes, expressing my exact thoughts. *** I woke up with a nearly creepy smile planted on my face. Witnessing Halston peacefully sleeping in front of me. This was a normal Friday morning for him and me. He always spent Thursday and weekend nights at my house. Mom trusted us not to do anything stupid, well… she trusted me not to let him do anything stupid. But let’s keep that in between us. As I stared at my best friend’s features all it reminded me of was how much of a caring person he was. He usually handled my feelings with care. I smiled and suddenly his eyes fluttered open, one of his eyelashes landing below his eye. I tried to quickly shut my eyes and act asleep but it was too late. “I saw you looking at me, weirdo.” Suddenly that last word made my chest feel a little heavy and a small gasp left my mouth. He knew that I was a soft person and he immediately regretted it. “S-sorry, I forgot. I didn’t mean it, Oakley.” “It’s okay.” I whispered, trying to smile. I got up from the bed and decided to take a shower and get ready for school. “What time is it?” Halston asked. I found the courage to speak since nothing had truly ruined my mood, yet. Even when I do speak, it’s only a few words at a time. I have always been this way. Stuck with a million things to say in my head but can’t express them. “6:37 A.M” I said, knowing he didn’t like to be awake this early. Which is why I chose to take a shower now instead of later, when he’d be awake. “Wake me up at 7:00. Please and thanks, Harley.” He said kindly. I opened the bathroom sliding door that connected to my room and walked in. I stepped in front of the glass shower, undressing insecurely. Scared that Halston might be peeking. But he would never do that. Right? I internally argued with myself. After being fully undressed I stepped into the shower and immersed myself in the decently warm water. I immediately got goosebumps and writhed under the water beads gliding down my skin in a satisfying way. I quickly washed my body, hair, teeth, and face. That’s right, I brush my teeth in the shower instead of in front of the sink like a normal person. I decided to stand under the warm water for a few more minutes and just… think. Halston’s parents are on a three-year trip around the world since their job is really complex. This isn’t the first time his parents have been on a crazy long trip, so he doesn’t exactly have an amazing relationship with them. Which is why my Mom counts him as her own son. My Mom and Halston have this very entertaining mother-son relationship and it has honestly brought Olive, Halston, and I, all closer together as siblings. Halston was enrolled in a new school since his parents think his grades are dropping because we go to the same school, but Mom doesn’t know that’s the reason why. So Halston, Olive, and I begged my Mom to let me and my sister join the same school as Halston. After doing the chores and cleaning the house everyday for one summer, she agreed to it. Today was the day. It started on a very odd day, Friday. Meaning there was only one day of school this week. After today there’d be the normal two-day weekend. After 10 of the quickest minutes of my life, I turned the knob, letting the water die down, leaving me cold and shivering. I walked out and Oh crap, I forgot a towel. I thought to myself. I kept quiet, annoyed with myself and tried to think of how I was going to fix this problem. I peeped my head from the sliding door that was separating my room and the bathroom, noticing that it was 6:57. “Halston.” I whispered, trying to wake him up from an impossible distance. “Halston!” I whispered a little louder. I reached my hand in the room, tapping on the wall with my fairly long nails, trying to wake him up. I didn’t feel comfortable yelling or saying anything out loud yet. Noticing that he was still sleeping. I slid the door open all the way, tip-toeing through my room to grab some clothes since I had already air-dried except for my hair. Water dripped from my light brown hair, slapping the cold hard-wood floor beneath me. My bottom lip shivered as I pulled my clothes drawer out, rapidly trying to choose my clothes. Then an alarm went off, Halston 7:00 am alarm. I reminded myself. His eyes fluttered open and he rolled over with his back faced to me. I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t say, ‘Don’t look’, I wasn’t able to tell him to not turn to me. My lips felt glued together and my throat dried immediately. I bit my bottom lip, stuck in the same position. I was frozen. And not including the fact that I was freezing from the AC beating on my just washed, cold body. “D...” I tried to talk, to open my mouth and tell him not to look. My voice trailed off. All that came out was a small squeak that caught his attention, making him stand up and whirl around. ‘Turn around! Are you insane?’ Is what I would have screamed at him if I had the strength. He eventually caught on from noticing my facial expression. I would have turned around to at least hide my front, but I couldn’t. He put his hands over his eyes, and slowly turned around not saying anything. I turned around, continuing what I was doing before, grabbing clothes. I winced at the embarrassment. Him not saying anything kind of made me insecure for some reason. Even telling me that I looked horrible would have made me feel better. But nothing? That’s torture. Maybe this is what people feel like when I don’t answer them… I thought to myself. I had completely forgotten that Halston was still there, waiting for me to get dressed. I chose a light mint green crop-top and light blue ripped jeans, and my white undergarments. I closed my drawer getting ready to change and then he turned around. “Halston!” I whisper-yelled. “Sorry, I heard the drawer close shut and so I thought you were finished.” He said calmly. Being completely unphased. My jaw dropped in astonishment as I clipped my bra on from the back. Sliding my shirt over and jumping a little to slip on my jeans. “Y- You can…” I paused, gulping a ball of air trying to make sure my throat wasn’t too dry. “Turn-n… around.” I whispered. He turned slowly and casually. “You didn’t even wake me up, I had to wake myself up. You’re lucky I set an alarm.” Yeah, ‘Lucky’. I mocked his words in my head. I awkwardly played with my nails, staring down at them trying my best to avoid eye contact with Halston. My anxiety was creeping up on me quickly. “If you’re freaking out about me seeing… you know. It’s fine. Don’t worry about it, okay?” He said kindly, walked closer to place a hand on my shoulder. I flinched a little as his hand made contact with the soft cotton of my mint green shirt. It was so thin I felt like his hand was touching my skin directly. “Mmhmm.” I nodded unconsciously. I couldn’t not worry about it. I didn’t even know what to think about the situation or how to feel about it. I was hoping Halston would say something about the way I looked. I don’t know what I was expecting from him, to be honest. I just wanted to know that I truly had nothing to worry about. I continued playing with my fingertips, bringing them up to my mouth to bite them. “Don’t bite your nails, you know I have a big problem with that.” He said, making it sound as nice as he possibly could. “I do-” I couldn’t finish the word. So I knew that I had to start over. “I don’t know what else t…” My voice trailed off and I couldn’t finish my sentence. “It’s okay. Trust me. Let’s try not to make this awkward.” He smiled, making me less worried about the situation. Just a little. My self conscious added. I gave a small smile in return. “School.” I peeped out. “Okay, let’s go. I have some clothes in here… somewhere. Which drawer? I forgot.” He mentioned. He always brought extra clothes over to my house and I put them away for him since I never wanted him going through my drawers. But I had completely forgotten about which drawer I kept them in. Probably because I always resort my drawers from the type of clothing to colors… a lot. “I don’t know. I forgot too, you know I change them a lot.” I said, my anxiety almost completely gone. “Okay, I’ll just look.” He said and walked towards the dresser, placing his hand on the top knob. Oh crap! My underwear and bras are in there! Don’t open it. I internally screamed. But clearly that helped nothing in reality. Before I would do anything about it, which I never still probably never do anything, the drawer was opened and his jaw dropped, immediately slamming it shut. My eyes widened and my face went pale at the thought of Halston seeing my undergarments. I saw the corner of his mouth tilt slightly upwards and I cocked my head to the side at the sight. Why would he grin at that? I thought, making my cheeks burn in embarrassment. I hastily rushed to the bathroom and brushed my hair. The feeling, oddly calming. After brushing through my decently long hair, I set the brush down and stared at myself in the mirror. I looked a little closer and noticed how pale my face was. I bent down, looked through the cabinet beneath the sink, grabbing my small makeup pouch. I unzipped the small black bag and reached my hand in, pulling out blush. My cheeks are naturally red enough, I told myself. I put the small pink container back into the pouch, pulling out lightly tinted lip gloss and mascara. I unscrewed the lip gloss top and gently swiped it across my bottom lip. I pursed my lips, spreading the gloss from one lip to the other. While grabbing the mascara, I widened my eyes, nearly looking insane and brought the black stick to my eyelashes. “Ah, ouch!” I winced, slapping my hand over the eye that I had just stabbed. “Oh my God, what happened!?” Halston bust through the door, practically screaming. “Nothing, I poked my eye.” I mentioned. “Oh… Nevermind.” “Yup.” “I was joking, are you okay?” “Yes.” “Okay great. I’ll be downstairs, I think Olive is calling me.” “I’ll be there in a little bit.” He smiled and winked as he turned and walked down the stairs happily. I attempted to apply the mascara on for the second time and unexpectedly, it worked. I put the pouch back under the sink and walked downstairs noticing Olive and Halston laughing. I cocked my head, wondering what was so funny. Once they saw me, they stopped giggling and continued eating their cereal. I sat on the empty seat next to Olive. “Hey Olive.” I grinned and she did the same. “Hey Oak.” She smiled, looking up to me but then her smile faded and she squinted her eyes, immediately knowing something was off, “Is something wrong?” “Nope.” I faked a smile, instantly regretting it. “You’re lying to me. Is it because Halston saw you naked?” My face turned crimson red, my eyes widening at the thought. “N-no.” I lied, my stutter giving it away easily. “Yes, it is. We have to go to our first day of school now. Technically we are the only ones at that school who are counting it as the first day since we’re going there at the end of the week, in the middle of the school year.” She mentioned casually. “Yeah…” I timidly spoke. *** I hadn’t had breakfast like Halston and Olive but that was fine, since my Mom bought me a yogurt cup to eat while she dropped us off. Mom walked into the office with us and signed a few papers and collected a few files. None of us had been to this school before, especially since it was a private school. The craziest thing about this highschool to me was that it had dorms. What kind of highschool has dorms? I thought that was only college. I thought to myself. Mom started crying as if she this was college and she was dropping us off. Halston, Olive, and I, sat down on a single bench in complete silence waiting for Mom and the office-lady to finish talking about thrift stores. After five solid minutes of non-stop conversation between the two, the office lady mentioned her son that went to this school and how he was going to give us a tour of the school. A boy that looked Olive and I’s age came jogging up to us then stopped right before the bench, looking down at us three. He looked the exact opposite of Halston, dark brown curly hair and caramel eyes, with light freckles spotted across his nearly red cheeks. I looked to Halston who was next to me and examined his face, trying to spot the similarities between the boys. Halston’s dirty blonde hair and blue eyes shone under the sunlight coming through the glass door. Yellow and fairly orange hue’s shaded his skin a nice golden color. He looked back at me and I averted my eyes immediately. I saw his lips slightly curl upwards at my embarrassment. The boy ahead of us looked directly at me. I stayed quiet and looked down in unknown shame. I played with my fingertips, clearing my throat awkwardly to break the silence. “Hey, I’m Olive. And you are…?” Olive started. “Chase London. I am here to give you guys a tour. Do you have your schedules?” The boy said, his voice oddly soothing, making me lift my head. Olive skipped over to Mom, asking her for our schedules and she passed her 3 sheets of nicely folded paper. Olive came back and handed the papers to Chase and he went through each of them, examining the classes each of us had. “How did you guys get that to happen?” Chase asked. “Get what to happen?” Halston said. “You guys have 4 of the same classes. I was wondering how you guys got to have so many of the same classes together.” “Just luck.” Olive smiled. “Okay, let’s go.” Chase added. Mom rushed over to us, hugging and squeezing the life out of us three. “I love you kids so much, and Halston?” Mom said. “Yes Ms. Harlow?” “Keep Oak safe, okay? You know you are the only one she really talks to.” She whispered to him but it was very clear what she was talking about. “Olive will be fine. But if either of them get hurt, you will be the first to get questioned. I love you, son. Have a fun day! Bye kids!” She walked the other direction and out the door. Halston walked back over to me and I was still embarrassed about this morning. Just thinking about it made me shaky. Halston gently reached for my hand to help my shaking and I placed my palm in his. Chase and Olive had already started a conversation and their laughs filled the room. “The tour…” I whispered to Halston. He nodded and spoke up. “What happened to our tour?” He said to Chase. They boy nodded and opened the door for us. “So this is the cafeteria.” He pointed to the large building across from the office we had just left. We walked inside and Halston caught up to Olive who was in front of all of us, leaving Chase and I in the back. “You guys are really tight siblings.” Chase said to me, nudging my side playfully. I flinched a little and took a small deep breath to calm myself down. His voice was soothing but I wasn’t comfortable enough with him for him to be this close. Olive and Halston both stopped in their tracks, and walked over to me, knowing I was uncomfortable. “What did you say to her?” Halston asked in an overprotective tone. “All I said was how close of siblings you three were. Especially since you two were holding hands like that.” Chases looked in between Halston and I. I looked at Halton and he did the same to me. It reminded me of this morning and my cheeks burned red. I turned my head the other way, pursing my lips, not wanting to talk. “Oakley is my twin, and Halston is my friend.” Olive said, making Halston and I break eye contact. “So I’m guessing you two are dating?” Chase pointed between the two of us. And I gently shook my head. “No, but it might seem like it since he is like the only person she talks to.” Olive said. “You don’t talk much?” Chase said, walking closer to me. I took a step back. He took one closer. My eyes started to water and I wanted to yell at him to back away. But I couldn’t. He was making me so uncomfortable and I didn’t know how to show it. I took one last step back, truly trying to get away from him. Halston caught on to my mood and stepped beside me, reaching for my hand. I once again placed my palm in his and he gently rubbed his thumb over the back of my hand. “I want to go.” I said softly, my words barely comprehendible. Halston and Olive were both used to my soft talking so they understood but Chase was clearly confused. Halston grabbed the papers from Chase and looked through them. “We can figure it out on our own. Thanks Chase.” And with that last sentence from Halston, we walked through campus. Class didn’t start until half an hour after we started venturing around school grounds. We had four morning classes together, along with lunch. We quietly walked to first period science and entered the room, immediately being introduced. The door was covered in white paint with the bright yellow words, ‘Ms. Keen’s Science Class’. I thought it was quite creative and it was so cute, counting that there were nicely painted sunflowers all over. We stepped into the room, all in a single file line. I didn’t realize Halston and I were still holding hands until he softly cleared his throat and gently pulled his hand away. I winced at the loss of his warm hand but was brought back to reality when the teacher repeated my name for the third or fourth time. “Ms. Harlow? Um, Oakley?” Ms. Keen said. I looked at her and nodded my head, not being able to talk. “Are you going to keep ignoring me? I asked you a question.” “I- Um.” I tried to speak but my voice came out small and airy. Halston placed his hand on my shoulder and spoke for me. “She doesn’t talk much. But she talks to me, and I can just translate it to you if you’d like.” He said to Ms. Keen, using his charm. “There we go, an actual talking human who isn’t afraid of talking in front of a class.” Ms. Keen said, her tone rude. “She isn’t afraid of talking, she physically can not. It’s a condition. Don’t judge her for it because you clearly are not informed of it.” Olive added. “Sit. Now.” Ms. Keen forcefully said. Her voice was deeper than one I’ve ever heard on a woman. *** Throughout the class, she kept eyeing me. I suddenly felt insecure and placed my hands over my stomach as I sat in my seat. 30 minutes later, class was still in session. I took a deep breath trying to recall what that lesson was about. We were reading a paragraph from a textbook. Volunteers’ hands rose while I stayed quiet. Until she called my name, “Oakley.” I looked up from the textbook awkwardly and looked around wondering what she wanted. “Are you going to read or do you want to get sent to detention?” She scolded. I shook my head as my throat went dry, tears begging to slip down my face. She walked slowly up to my desk and ripped the textbook out of my hands, giving me a paper cut. “You’re on the wrong page. You will have detention if you do not read. Weren’t you taught to read? Are you stu-” Her voice got louder with each hurtful word until she was cut off. “She isn’t stupid, she has never had a C in her life. I’m pretty sure the lowest grade she ever got was a B+, and that was once. Do not call her stupid. She has S.M. Do you know what that is, Ms. Keen?” Olive said, daringly standing up from her chair. “Sit down, now.” “No. She can not talk, if you want her to talk, I think you’d have to put Halston and her desk’s together. She doesn’t talk to anyone else. You can not get mad when you know you can fix the problem and choose not to.” Olive frustratingly sat back down as Ms. Keen walked back to her seat. “Halston sit your chair on the opposite side of Oakley’s desk. No complaints. Do not mess this up, or you will both be sent to detention.” Ms. Keen plainly said. Halston scooted his chair over to mine, purposely making it screech across the floor. Once Halston was in front of me, I felt like everything was… lighter. I was happier that he was right by me. Halston read the paragraph for me, thankfully and had to go to our next class right after with Olive. All the other teachers were pretty chill. Nothing crazy happened, just introducing ourselves and meeting new people. (Which I was horrible at). Our fourth period bell rang and we made our way to the dorms to figure out what we wanted to eat. We had one hour to eat, which to me, was the perfect amount of time. I only ate a granola bar so I was pretty hungry. We made our way to the dorms and Halston pulled out our papers, checking what rooms we were in. “You two are in A21 and I’m in B19. I’ll be upstairs, right above you. Let’s go to yours first and then we can check out mine.” Olive and I smiled at each other and Halston laughed at us. We followed Halston, not knowing where to go. We stopped not that far in the hallway and Halston handed us two cards, one for each of us, to swipe and open the door. We walked in and there were already two people in the mini kitchenette. The girl with short, curled red hair and brown eyes looked at us and smiled. “Oh my gosh! Hi, I’m Heather. This is my brother Flynn, he lives upstairs in B20, but he is here most of the time. I am so happy I am getting two new roommates. This is amazing.” She squealed all in one breath. Flynn looked a little younger, maybe 16. Olive winked at him and I winced at the embarrassment I would have felt if I had done that. “Hey, I’m Halston, these two are Olive and Oakley. Nice to meet you too.” Halston held his hand out to Heather and she blushed wildy, taking his hand in hers. I looked at where their hands met and noticed how long their skin was touching. I didn’t like it one bit and neither did Halston. Halston lightly tugged his hand from hers and she wouldn’t let his hand go. He chuckled awkwardly and I looked at him, telepathically asking him what I should do. He didn’t give me any sort of sign back but I knew he was uncomfortable. Olive was too busy flirting with Flynn to acknowledge what was going on around her. “Our rooms.” I mumbled and that caught her attention. She let go of his hand that was glistening with sweat. Ew- She gave us a quick tour of the dorm which was surprisingly large. I looked over to Olive who was seated on the couch laughing with Flynn. Flynn didn’t have red hair like his sister, itead he had cherry blonde, but they definitely looked alike with their high cheekbones and button noses. Their diamond face and almond eye shape looked almost identical. Flynn had blue eyes, also unlike Heather. In the dorm were four rooms, but now three were taken. There was an extra empty one that Heather used as Flynn’s room. I wonder why he has his own room in his sister’s dorm. It’s a little odd. Nevermind, I shouldn’t judge. I walked into the room which was now mine and it was already perfectly decorated. The walls were a nice subtle lavender with little white flowers coming from the bottom. A queen sized bed sat in the center of the room. The white sheets and soft baby blue duvet thrown over. There was a white fur carpet underneath the foot of the bed. I looked to my left noticing a small but neat studying desk. It was all different pastel colors with a simple white chair. I loved the simplicity of everything. How did Heather decorate my room so… perfectly? I wondered what Olive’s looked like and walked over to hers. It was pretty similar but it weirdly also fit Olive’s personality. There were succulents and small pretty plants hanging from the ceiling in cute mini baskets. There were vibrant colors popping out from obvious parts of the room. She had a Rugrats poster above her desk. Her blankets were a vibrant orange with Rugrats bedsheets. The carpet was a mixture of bright colors. It was very unique and I liked it a lot. All we needed was clothes from home and a few home decorations to put in our rooms and everything would be perfect. I took my iPhone out of my back pocket and unlocked it, admiring my aesthetic lavender background. I looked at the time, noticing we still had 52 minutes of lunch hour left. I walked into the living room, listening to everyone talk on the couch. No one had noticed I was there yet. It was fine. I don’t need anyone to notice me and plus, I’d usually just stand in the corner anyways. My eyes oddly kept swinging back to Halston and his one-of-a-kind smile. His white T-shirt was a couple sizes too big, but somehow, he pulled it off. He could pull anything off. I came back to reality and felt my lips already curved into a smirk, thinking about Halston. I wiped it away and luckily no one noticed. Except for Halston. He quietly got up and walked to me, everyone’s conversation neverending. “You were looking at me, Harley.” He grinned. “N-no, I wasn’t.” I stuttered, worried someone would hear me. “Don’t worry, they are too loud to hear you. You can speak up if you want.” He leaned against the wall like me, stuffing his hands comfortably in his pockets. “How’d you know I was um,” I paused, clearing my throat. “T-thinking that.” “I can tell, it’s your eyes.” “My uh- my eyes?” “Yes. Your eyes.” “About this morning-” “It’s fine, Oak. It was a mistake, I should have just waited until you told me to turn around.” “I know, that’s not what I'm talking about. I was going to say… that um,” My throat dried a little and my anxiety heightened. “When you saw um, you know- you didn’t say anything…” I whispered. “What was I supposed to say, ‘Goodmorning’?” He joked, making me smile a little. “Sorry, I don’t know what I was expecting… what’s for lunch? I’m starving.” “We will finish this conversation when there’s less people, okay?” He said and kissed my head lightly, walking the other direction to call everyone over for lunch. “Okay.” I whispered under my breath, knowing that he couldn't hear me. “I love you.” He turned his head around and looked at me, mouthing the words, ‘I love you too’. My eyes went wide, How did he hear me!? Oh my God. You might think I’m weird for freaking out over a small ‘I love you’, but Halston and I don’t say it much. Mostly because I don’t talk much. But he shouldn’t have been able to hear me. Right? *** We ended up driving to Red Robin. Yumm. We got out of Heather’s car, with Flynn and Olive still partnered up. When we walked up to the door Halston held out the doors for everyone and it reminded me of how much of a gentleman he was. But he was quite silly. I smiled at the thought and Olive noticed, making me blush from embarrassment. She squinted her eyes trying to figure me out. Our table was ready quicker than I expected it to be. After we ordered, we waited for our food to arrive. Olive, Flynn, Halston, and Heather had started a conversation about a party later tonight. I did not want to attend anything with a bunch of smelly teens and underaged drunks. I’m just not a part of that crowd. I sat in the corner of the booth, minding my own business, not wanting to talk to anyone. I slumped down a little, pulling out my phone and playing Paper.io. I died and a small squeal of defeat escaped my mouth. No one noticed. Except Halston. He placed his hand on my shoulder and leaned a little closer. What. Are. You. Doing!? He opened his mouth slightly and I pushed him on the chest, he didn’t budge one bit. “Wh- what are you doing?” I asked with big eyes. “I was going to ask you what was wrong.” “Why were you so… so close. And then you opened your mouth-” “I was so close, because it’s quite hard to hear in here since it’s so loud. I was making sure you’d hear me. I opened my mouth so I could… you know- talk?” He said it in a matter-of-fact tone. I realized how stupid I sounded. “I’m sorry, um… ignore me.” I smiled lightly. “No thanks. Now why were you upset?” “I died.” “What?” His eyes went wide and his face went pale, clearly worried about what I had just said. “In my game.” I said, lightly waving my phone in the air. “Oh.” He laughed and it made me giggle at how his expression switched so rapidly. “Yep.” “So how do you like this school so far?” He said changing the subject. “It’s… neat.” “Yeah, I like our old school. But I’m just happy that you’re here with me.” ‘Why?’ Is what I would have asked if I had the balls. My mind kept going to the worst like when he came close to me, I thought he was going to ki- “Because I like it when you’re around.” He said, interrupting my thoughts. “Of course I like it when you’re around, you’re my best friend.” I don’t know why but I felt like I was friend zoned. I don’t like Halston in that way, it’s just I wasn’t expecting that. I felt tears surface my eyes and I can’t explain why. “R- Restroom.” I muttered, not trusting my voice enough to speak a full sentence. He scooted over and I rushed to the restroom. My tears spilled over the edge as I sat on the toilet lid. I still couldn’t figure out why I was sad about what Halston said. It’s not even something to cry about. I’m just overreacting. *** Olive told me that the party was mandatory since it was actually an orientation. I figured that since we were new to the school we could go to the orientation, but why would there be one in the middle of the year? I wondered. I shrugged. She didn’t lie, but she didn’t tell the truth. Yes, sure it was an orientation, just not one hosted by the school. It was hosted by a group of boys that went to the school. It was around 8PM, meaning the sky was pitch black this time of year. I sat on a log as my face glowed red, orange, and gold from the blazing bonfire ahead of me. Heather had lended Olive and I a pair of high waisted jeans and warm sweaters. The woody fragrance of smoke propagates through the air. The fire could be felt but it still wasn’t enough to keep me entirely warm. Loud music vibrated through the over-sized speakers. Ashen debris flowed out of the crackling fire and among the socializing students. Everyone seemed to know each other, even Olive. She was meeting new people with Flynn while I sat alone on the log. I looked around for Heather and Halston but I couldn’t spot them. The setting was crowded and was definitely not my style at all, so I couldn’t help but feel tiny and out of place. It felt more like a party than an orientation, not that I had ever attended an actual party, but I was going off of what I’ve seen in movies. Needless to say, I was gravely uncomfortable. I stood up, ready to walk back to the dorms or text my Mom to pick us up. I didn’t realize that this school was so much like college to the point where we were supposed to bring packed items for our dorms. Let alone me knowing there were dorms in the first place. I started walking the opposite direction to the dorms until Heather showed behind me, calling out my name. “Oakley, where are you going?” “I’m cold.” “So you do speak.” “Mmhmm.” I hummed not wanting to talk anymore. “Yeah, I’m freezing too.” Water vapor floated from her mouth and into the chilly air. It was clearly visible. Her teeth were chattering and I knew why. All she was wearing was a thin cream strapless dress with her hair in a cute red loose bun. “Here you go…” I took off the sweater she had given me earlier but she refused to take it. “I don’t want you to be cold as well. Just keep it.” She smiled. “I can get one for you.” I offered. “Nah, it’s fine. I can get through it.” Well there goes my escape for a breather. I puff air from my cheeks lightly kicking at the ground in disappointment. “Halston… where is h-” I started but I was cut off by two girls running up from behind Heather. “Heather!” The girls squealed, as I took a step back admiring how Heather grinned widely. They burst out in a fit of laughter and giggles. I liked how they were so excited to see one another. One of the girls had beautiful golden skin and long tight curls cascading down her bare shoulders and back, due to her risque dress. She had pretty green eyes and pearly white teeth. “When did you girls get here?” Heather asked. The girl with slightly lighter brown hair that fell only to her shoulders with pretty blue eyes answered first. Lola. “My mom dropped me off an hour ago, so I ate and then came here.” “Nice, well this is Oakley Harlow, one of my new roommates. The other is her twin and I don’t know where Oakley’s boyfriend went.” She smiled, winking at me and introduced me to her friends. “Halston isn't my-" I started, but the girls cut me off. "Oh my God, I love your name. It's so pretty." The pretty caramel skinned girl shouted over the deafening music. Jane. "Oh God, Is that Chase?" Heather said as if she was embarrassed. "That's my older brother, I'm sure you'll get to meet him soon." "I already have..." I whispered underneath my breath. They gasped and turned to me. God, this is going to be a long night, isn't it?

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saiilorstars · 4 years

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The Girl in the Forest

Chapter 19: Among the Battles

// Story Masterlist //

Fandom: The Originals

Pairings: Klaus Mikaelson x Original Female Character

Pronunciation of OC’s name: Ma-leh-nee

Requested tag: @queenmj10

~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~

Chapter Summary: Maleny must put her feelings aside in order to help her friend keep her body from being taken over, thanks to Esther!

The next morning in the compound was filled with tension. Finn and Kol had been forced to stay the night shackled and were now sat at a formal breakfast table. Elijah was looking over them while Cami and Hayley stood several feet away - Hayley none too pleased to see either of them still alive. She'd brought them in to see revenge, and instead they get breakfast catered to them?

"So, I don't quite understand what we're doing here," Cami slowly said to Hayley in concern of the two Mikaelson warlocks. She actually expected more violence than what she was seeing.

"Neither do I," Hayley mumbled,"I think it's about time we were joined by the others, don't you think?" Cami shrugged and so Hayley went on her way.

~ 0 ~

Klaus felt like putting an end to the peaceful morning would be like a sin, and while he was usually inclined to commit these faults this precise one didn't seem so tempting. It was half past eleven and the pretty blonde was still fast asleep beside him on his bed. He, on the other hand, had gotten up and changed but she still hadn't made the slightest of moves. It amazed Klaus how she could still be so...normal in the middle of so many supernatural creatures. But, then again, that had always been Maleny - the village girl surrounded by vampires and a witch. She had stayed true to her 'girl in the forest' title for so many centuries he wondered if she was truly ready to become one of them - one of the dead.

Klaus pushed away those thoughts and focused on the good he had in front of him. He reached for Maleny's hand and gently dragged it till it was between them. He held her hand and turned it over, lightly rubbing it with his fingers. He was barely beginning to consider the idea of waking Maleny up when she took in a deep breath. She shifted a bit before languidly opening her eyes.

"It's too bright..." she mumbled, her voice hoarse from sleep.

"That's because this isn't your room, love," Klaus knew his voice would put her on red alert for a short time before she remembered anything.

Maleny's eyes snapped opened and blinked rapidly as she took in the hybrid beside her, "Klaus?"

"Maleny?"

"I'm...I'm in your room..."

"Yes, you are."

"...on your bed..."

"Correct."

Maleny pushed herself up into a sitting position and pushed her hair from her face to get a clearer look of the picture, "I don't...I don't really..." and then she remembered, and gasped, "I fell asleep here! And you let me fall asleep here!"

"Only by a couple seconds," Klaus shrugged, "I felt you fall asleep and while I did consider moving you back to your room my mind may have shut down before I could carry the idea out."

"You asked me to stay here with you till you could fall asleep on your own," Maleny recalled his request last night and looked at him, still mildly alarmed.

"Thank you," Klaus smirked, "I don't think I have slept so peacefully since...well, since our village days."

Maleny looked away, blushing, "Don't start please."

Klaus laughed, "What? I'm not saying anything wrong, am I?"

"You know damn well what you're doing!" She tried hitting him with a pillow but of course he would easily dodge the blows and take it altogether from her.

"Don't scowl, you're far prettier when you smile."

Maleny mimicked Klaus as she got up from the bed. She made straight for the door but as soon as she opened it she bumped into Hayley.

"Mal...?" Hayley's eyebrows raised upwards in shock.

Maleny shook her head, "It's really not what it looks like, I promise."

"It's really not," Klaus agreed from the bed, looking very amused at the show he had across him.

"Be quiet," Maleny pointed a finger at him, to which she received a miming of him zipping his mouth.

Hayley passed a hand through her hair and focused on what she came for, "Look, you guys do you but right now you both need to come downstairs."

"What's downstairs?" Maleny asked.

"Finn and Kol."

Klaus shot up from the bed and walked up to them, traces of plafulness gone, "How are they here?"

"I helped bring them in last night," Hayley explained, "But, for some reason, Elijah said not to bother you till today...now I know why."

The crooked smirk on her face had Maleny blushing again. Hayley stepped to the side and motioned Klaus to walk out first.

"I'll see you in a bit," he said to Maleny and left.

Hayley stood by her spot and smirked at Maleny. The blonde rolled her eyes "Be quiet, Hayley."

"Oh give me this, I haven't had a good moment in forever," the brunette hybrid chuckled.

"Sorry to say, my love life is not for anyone's amusement."So, how the hell Finn and Kol here? Last time I heard, Kol wasn't even in the Quarter."

"Marcel got him in the end," Hayley replied, "Though I doubt Davina is going to take that lightly."

"I don't want to talk about her right now," Maleny shook her head, still overly irritated with the teen, "Kol's deserved all that's coming for him. Finn, Finn is another story."

"So, you wanna see them?"

"Definitely, but I have to get changed first," she gestured to her sleeping clothes and led Hayley out of the room. Hayley happily smirked and went after the blonde, already coming up with ways to tease Maleny.

~ 0 ~

Klaus was content seeing how his morning was getting better and better by the hour. First, it had been realizing Maleny spent a night beside him, asleep, and hadn't been upset by the matter either. And now, Klaus felt like it was an honor to see two of his brothers, Finn and Kol, shackled by the wrists, and forced to sit across him at the table - neither able to do their precious magic.

Yes, it was a very good day so far.

Maleny thought the same the moment she saw the scene when she entered with Hayley, "Ooh, you should've woken me up earlier," she smirked and sauntered her way up to the table, taking up a piece of sweet bread.

"Mal," Kol looked at her with a devious smile, "you think you can convince my brother here," he nodded over to Klaus, "to take this nasty things off?" he held up his shackled wrists.

Klaus rolled his eyes and held his tongue at the lame attempt of Kol. He preferred to see how Maleny would react to that, or even better Hayley herself.

"Perhaps," Maleny pretended to think about it and went behind Kol's chair, "but I don't think I want to attempt. You weren't nice to me. And you Finn," she shot the silent witch a glare, "tried using my good friend, Amarrah, for something I would assume is bad."

"Technically that was Finn," Kol tilted his head up to the blonde, "So, c'mon?"

"Oh shut it," Maleny stuffed her sweet bread to his mouth and walked back to Hayley, "Where's Elijah?" she looked around for the other Original.

"We needed someone else for today's plans," Klaus replied and reached for glass, "Of course none of it would be required if you two," he looked at the two warlocks, "forget your animosity toward Elijah and myself. Instead, join us against Esther who truly deserves your ire- our mother. Do this, and we will welcome you with open arms."

"Might want to revise the last sentence," muttered Hayley who crossed her arms and sent glares of daggers towards both warlocks.

Klaus smirked, having heard Hayley, "Of course, if you continue to oppose us, a denial of pastries will be the least of your concerns."

Kol finally spit out the bread from his mouth and wearily looked at Klaus, "If all you wanted was my allegiance against Mother Dearest, you should have said so! Save me a night shackled to the wall."

Maleny snickered, "You had him shackled to the wall all night?" she looked at Hayley.

"Hey," the brunette hybrid gave a light shrugged, "if it had been up to Elijah, he would've removed their limbs, one by one, until they complied. Thank God he had Cami and I."

Klaus had to laugh at the antic. He rose from his chair and addressed his brothers, "We've-we've no desire to torture you. Provided you vow to stand beside us!"

"Brothers…" Finn spoke up for the first time, and his tone implied no sudden movement of sides, "Does that word even apply to us? After all these centuries of betrayal? And, has loyalty to you ever rewarded? If so, tell me, Niklaus- where is our sister, Rebekah?" the question left Klaus quiet for a minute, allowing Fin to continue, "She was blindly loyal to you for a thousand years, and now? Nowhere to be found. Where did our sister go? And, how did she escape your vile machinations?"

Klaus had turned over to Hayley and Maleny, clearly suspicious of Finn's indications. Was it possible Esther already knew Hope was alive? Well, none of the trio would let them find out if they didn't know.

"You have a big mouth that won't stop," accused Maleny, walking up to the table again, "Your mother is a thief, a liar. After all, she did make you what you so long hated."

"She was trying to make us mortal again!" Finn argued with her in frustration, "And I wouldn't be so quick to blame my mother for this - have you forgotten you also took place in our curse?"

It took a moment for Maleny to be able to answer without guilt, "No, I remember what I did...and had I known what your parents had in mind I would have never accepted," she glanced back to Klaus, her voice growing softer, "I wouldn't have. She tricked me," she repeated solely for him.

Klaus gave her a nod and joined her side, putting a hand on her back and looking at Finn, "This conversation has reached to an end seeing you choose to stay with our mother. However, turn this against Maleny another time and I may just consider Elijah's idea of torture for you."

Finn raised an eyebrow, not surprised by the threat, "You two may have declined the proposal, only showing how far you've fallen...but I expect Rebekah will have a different response to her proposal. See, unlike the you, she always did cling to her humanity."

"Rebekah is off-limits to you. You pursue her, and you will suffer," Klaus didn't fail to warn in his dark tone.

"Don't both making threats, Klaus," Hayley walked over to the edge of the table, "We all know Rebekah doesn't want to be found."

"Hm, Esther is quite determined," Finn challenged her calmness, "She's been searching for Rebekah since the day she returned. I imagine it's only a matter of time.

"So then what?" Maleny decided to speak up, sensing both Hayley's and Klaus' worriment for their daughter, "You try to force Rebekah into this proposal? Because that's exactly what you've tried doing here. This isn't a 'proposal'. It's an ultimatum in hiding."

"Hey, you've gotten smarter," Kol remarked with an air of sarcasm.

"Don't be fooled, brother," Finn cut in, "She did blindly accept a curse with no forcive action."

Maleny pursed her lips, taken down momentarily. A cellphone went off and figuring it was his, Klaus walked off to the side to see who it was. Rebekah's name on the ID couldn't mean a good thing so he decided to go even further to get away from Hayley's super-hearing boundaries. Meanwhile, Hayley decided to go in and defend her friend. She walked to Finn and promptly bit into his neck, making the warlock yelp in pain.

"Hayley!" Maleny had been startled by the action as well.

Hayley pulled away, showing her golden hybrid eyes, "What? He had it coming."

Maleny sighed and shrugged, "Well, thanks, but I don't need it. I'm not sorry for what I did, nor do I regret it. Because of it I stand here today to see such...wonderful things," she genuinely smiled, "Because I took the curse I met Cami and Hayley, two friends - no, family - that I love to death. I have learned that I am not as weak as I once thought I was. So yes, Finn, I did 'blindly take a curse'," Maleny leaned on the table wearing a wide smirk, "but I have lived in many ways that you have not. Isn't there a coffin you almost barely left?" Finn glared at her but didn't say anything back.

"Hey," Cami came into the compound, looking worried for some reason, "Um, Hayley?" she went directly to the brunette, dismissing the scene before them.

"What is it?" Hayley caught onto Cami's worried looks a lot quicker than one would think, "Who's in trouble now?"

"Em…" Cami's eyes drifted over to Finn, letting Hayley know not much could be said in front of them at the moment.

Hayley looked around and saw Klaus returning from his phone call, "Mal, I have to go apparently," the blonde nodded and motioned for them to leave, "This can't be good, is it?"

"Nope," Cami shook her head and hurried out with Hayley, rushing into the story of her frantic wolves.

Maleny went over to Finn and grabbed a cloth for his neck, "She was right you know, you did have that one coming," she told the warlock while cleaning the blood off.

"And yet here you are," Finn smirked and looked up at her.

"Finn, believe it or not, your crazy family was like my own family back in the day. You do remember, no?"

Finn rolled his eyes and looked away.

Maleny sighed and put the cloth on the table, finally noticing Klaus' face, "What is it now?" It wasn't even noon and things were going bad again?

Klaus motioned for her to follow him away from the table and quickly she did. He stopped around the threshold of the living room and told her Rebekah was basically on the run from Esther.

"You need to go, then," the blonde wasted no time in saying, even ushering him to get a move on.

"And leave you here with those two?" and at that, Klaus had a good laugh.

"They're shackled," Maleny reminded with an indignant scoff, "You think I can't handle that? Do not forget I am a witch as well."

"A bit out of practice, love. I am all for you practicing again but not when it's with my two oh-so-clever brothers itching to escape at all costs," he made a point and motioned for there to be silence to think, "Elijah can go. If he comes back here he'll probably kill them by nightfall."

"I will look after him, Cami will help," Maleny assured him, "I think after months Hope just needs her father."

"What she needs- what we need- are allies to help us defeat my mother. Finn and Kol must be turned to our side. Without their help, there will be nowhere left for Hope to run."

"Don't stand there and act all...indifferent," she waved a hand at him.

"I am not indifferent to the matter," he corrected her, "There are pressing matters I need to take care of before I can give myself the luxury of seeing Hope again. Getting Finn and Kol on our side can benefit her as well as you," Maleny blinked at that, "If we can get the location of your previous body then we can end the curse and…"

Maleny put her hands on his face, sadly smiling at him, "Thank you for that. But I...I can't ask you to give up your own daughter just to look for my corpse."

Klaus took her hands from his face, holding them tightly in his own, "Mal, I would have thought by now you would see how important you are to me…"

"No, I...I do know," Maleny assured him, "Believe me, after yesterday I don't...doubt you one bit. But you remember what I said before, right? I shouldn't be over your daughter, and I don't want to see that even now."

"I'm not, I'm compromising," Klaus clarified her, "Today, let's make it safe for you and her. Tomorrow, we see her - together."

Maleny's eyebrows raised upwards and couldn't help smile almost instantly, "Okay…" she whispered, allowing him to lead her back to the awaiting brothers who one way or another would be giving up information.

~ 0 ~

Cami was in the bayou with Hayley who was having a tensed talk with Aiden and Jackson. The blonde vampire would've joined had it not been for a call from Elijah. Apparently he was to be meeting Rebekah but Hayley was not supposed to know just yet. Cami assured Elijah she would maintain the secret until told otherwise. Her task now was to keep Hayley preoccupied until her next task came in.

However, it appeared things were no better with the wolves as they out-rightly refused to listen to Hayley. After setting a meeting with them through Aiden, Hayley returned to Cami holding a leather bound book.

"Is Jackson okay?" Cami had to ask when she saw the other wolf drowning beers down like there was no tomorrow.

"The wolves are getting antsy," Hayley sighed as she skimmed the pages of the journal, "Aiden set up meeting with them. This is the chance we have to get them on our side."

"Not to be a downer or anything, but as long as Esther can give them power through those rings, it'll be really tough to get them on our side."

Hayley briefly looked up at the blonde, "Thanks for not being a downer."

Cami sheepishly smiled, "Sorry. So, what's that?" she pointed to the journal.

"It hopefully has something we can use for the wolves. But we have to read it all."

At that, Cami beamed and held a hand for the book, "Give me. I'm a psychology student, I've got tons of experience on reading - and fast," Hayley gave her a look, "I crammed a lot," Cami explained and motioned for the journal.

Hayley handed over the journal, "Get to reading then, student."

Cami playfully rolled her eyes and opened the journal up, getting for her task. Hayley followed the blonde silently for a better reading atmosphere. She still cast a glance back for Jackson, worried over the man. It wasn't every day a wolf pack turned on you.

~ 0 ~

Whilst Klaus went to retrieve a missing part of their supposed plan, Maleny waited in the ballroom with Kol and Finn - both still whom were shackled. The blonde witch had a bowl of berries in front of her and wearily munched on them while thinking...outloud.

"If I were Esther where would I put a corpse that didn't belong to me?" her blue eyes cast over to the two brothers, "Any ideas?"

"Even if I did know you wouldn't know," Kol shot at her, then smirked, "Unless you'd remove these things from me," he raised his wrists.

"I didn't take you for an idiot, Kol," Maleny bluntly said and earned a glare from the teen.

"Oh, you're only angry with me because I chose not to help Klaus save you. Let the past go, Mal."

Maleny put a finger to her lips and pretended to think, "No, that's not what my anger is about anymore. You were helping Davina kill your own brother, therefore putting her against me as well. I lost a friend because of you."

"Davina hated Klaus long before either of us showed up, sweetheart," Kol pointed out a very honest detail, "So time to let it go."

"I'll let it go," Maleny leaned back on her chair, "Soon after your mother let's go of my corpse which I know she has."

"Took you long enough," muttered Kol and earned a glare from his brother.

"I so knew it," the blonde crossed her arms, "Where is it?" she demanded yet neither brother answered her, "Where is it!?" she nearly shouted the next.

"There's no need to know of its whereabouts," Finn began but Maleny had reached her breaking point with them.

"Yes there is!" she shouted that time, "Because of this little important detail: it's mine!" she slammed a hand on the table, "And I need it!"

Finn released a smirk which indicated nothing good was about to be said, "You can get it back after you accept my mother's offer. She'll break the curse for you."

"I have two hands I can do it on my own!"

"It requires magic you no longer have access to."

"Then Amarrah can do it," Maleny quickly inputted, "How I break my curse is none of your business. Your business is to hand the corpse over."

Their conversation was interrupted by the entrance of Klaus into the room, Marcel coming in right behind them.

"Mal, I apologize for keeping you waiting with such bad company," Klaus walked over and helped the blonde stand.

"It's okay, we talked and I remembered how they're both jerks," she shot them both a look.

"And I suddenly remembered how you annoyed me at times," Kol returned the favor with a smirk, "Tell me, do you ever grow tired of whining and complaining to my brother?"

Maleny tensed and glared at him, but this time stayed quiet. She knew he was right, she just never liked to think about it too much. It made her feel less guilty.

"Marcel, take your pick," Klaus looked at the man in waiting, his voice edgy from Kol's comment.

"Oh," Marcel immediately beamed, "That's easy…" he walked up behind Kol's chair, "First, you messed with Davina. Now, I hear you wanna drag Rebekah into all this. Uh-uh. Not happening."

"See if you can get anything about a corpse that Esther's keeping," Maleny said, ignoring Klaus' surprised look on her, "Or you could just leave Esther's side. Either way I will get the location of my previous corpse - no matter who has to be tortured."

~ 0 ~

After separating Kol and Finn into two rooms, Klaus took Maleny into the living room, getting straight to the part of Maleny's corpse's whereabouts. Things only got worse when she told him just how she discovered Esther possessed it.

"You visited Esther on your own!?" the shout Klaus gave had Maleny flinching.

"Calm down, it was like for 10 minutes," Maleny tried dismissing the issue but of course it was too big of a problem for Klaus to forget about it.

"Maleny, what were you thinking? Did you miss the part where my mother is evil? Out of her mind?"

"I'm desperate, okay!?" Maleny walked off a bit, "I had my suspicions and I followed them through. I was right."

"You could have been hurt! Or worse, taken as leverage against us," and of course Klaus was correct in all his thoughts. Esther was that twisted in using love against her own children.

"I know that," Maleny grumbled, crossing her arms, "But I wasn't gonna drag you into it when you had bigger problems to deal with. Kol's right, I whine and complain to you 23 hours of the 24. I don't want to rely on you for everything."

"Well, then we have a problem because I don't want you taking stupid risks - especially ones where Esther is involved," Klaus walked up to her and turned her around, letting her see he was dead serious.

Maleny softened up as the frustration got to her, "I just want to be free…"

"Then let me help," Klaus nearly pleaded her, "I can keep you safe, Mal. Let me."

"I'm sorry I went behind your back," Maleny glumly apologized, feeling he deserved that much, "I make no promises that it won't happen again because you know...it's me."

Amused, Klaus smiled, "Yes, I know it's you. But a little notice, that wasn't always you."

"I've had a good teacher," Maleny shrugged, smirking a little, "And he also taught me how to get what I want. It may not be the most moral way but it gets the job done. And I want nothing more than to use it on your brothers - all offense can be taken at this point."

But no offense was taken. Instead, Klaus laughed and took her hand into his, "I look forwards to pleasing you, then."

"See if anyone was outside that could've been taken in a completely different context," Maleny laughed, sporting a blush on her cheeks. She sobered up while gathering courage to speak the truth that was becoming more of a burden for her than anything, "Do you think that I'm whiny? And that I complain to you a lot?"

"No," Klaus said instantly, making Maleny believe he hadn't even thought about to spare her feelings.

"C'mon, Klaus, just tell me the truth. It has a point, I promise."

"Mal, I am telling the truth," Klaus insisted with a small laugh, "You've only asked of me two things in the whole time you've been here: help you break the curse and help you acquire your previous corpse. Now, what's your point?"

"Do you like me even when I actually do complain to you all bloody day? Or how about when I ignore your requests and go out on my own?" Maleny asked and stepped forwards, "Cos I irritate you a lot and you know it. Do you still think you could like me like that?"

"Mal," Klaus chuckled and once more took her hand, gently rubbing its back with his thumb, "I don't think I could ever stop being fond of you."

Suddenly, it became difficult to stand on her feet under Klaus' intense stare. Maleny couldn't come up with a response then, but two seconds later it wouldn't be a problem anymore.

"MALENY!" Her French friend, Amarrah, came in from the courtyard and was screaming at the top of her lungs, sounding furious, "MALENY!"

Maleny and Klaus shared a look of confusion, Maleny regretting the interruption of their conversation. She ran past Klaus and came up to the banister, seeing her dark-haired friend standing below, the fury in her screams matching the look on her face.

"Where the hell is Finn Mikaelson?" Amarrah demanded from Maleny.

"I don't...understand," Maleny said slowly and glanced to her side as Klaus came to join her.

"Looking for my brother, dear?" the hybrid studied the French woman he hadn't had a chance to properly meet yet, "I'm afraid he's a little tied up at the moment…" and he chuckled at the irony.

"Spare me your annoying sarcasm and tell me where the hell you put him in?" Amarrah snapped rudely at him, surprising Maleny as she'd never seen a side of Amarrah like that.

"Ams, what's wrong?" the blonde nervously inquired.

Amarrah angrily turned her back to the two and lifted her black hair into a pony tail, allowing a brief glimpse of scars running down from her neck, "I am going to kill that stupid warlock!" she screamed again.

~ 0 ~

While Hayley didn't want to say anything of the boredom she was in waiting for Cami to finish reading Jackson's journal, it was clearly evident in her pacing manner and languid kicking of rocks on the ground. Cami sat on a rock busy studying the pages as best as she could and knew she was losing the patience of Hayley. She didn't want the hybrid moving away and thus learning her daughter was going to be back in town.

"Ooh, wait a minute," she had finally caught something interesting in the journal and was deeply grateful for the streak of luck. Hayley looked up from her fascinating game of rock kicking to see what Cami was talking about, "Look at this," Cami motioned for Hayley to come closer, "There's this thing about marriages and vows…"

"I'm not looking for marriage history, Cami," Hayley said, losing interest in the news.

"N-n-n-no, just listen," Cami smiled brightly, "You'll want to talk to Jackson about this, c'mon!"

She pulled Hayley off to go in search of Jackson for a better clarification of the mythological marriage. On their way, she explained the basics of it to Hayley and got the hybrid excited for the possible solution to her wolf pack.

Jackson was chopping firewood near his trailer when the two women found him. Hayley took the journal from Cami and walked ahead, "You wanna stop playing mountain-man and explain why you kept this from me?" Jackson looked up from his work and sighed, already figuring what detail she'd want to discuss with him, "Why don't I jog your memory?" she flipped to the page Cami had bookmarked, "The werewolves' power can be traced back to the myth of the Unification Ceremony, a ritual that bestowed certain unique abilities onto every member of the pack."

"Is that true?" Cami asked from her spot a couple feet behind Hayley, "It sounds a bit mystical…"

"I didn't at first," Jackson admitted, "And then Ansel swore he saw it with his own eyes. And then he dies, and I found out he was resurrected from a thousand years ago, which means he was alive to see it!"

Hayley closed the journal and shook her head, "How did I not know about this?"

"You didn't grow up out here," Jackson reminded her, "Yeah, every kid grows up hearing the stories. Back in the day, werewolf bloodlines were all distinct, right? Some had speed, some had strength, some could sense enemies from miles away. Now, to evolve, we would perform a ritual. A shaman would marry the alphas of each bloodline, and then the special abilities of each would be... inherited, mystically, by everyone who participated in the ritual. See, after a few centuries, everybody had the same abilities, so alpha marriages became political. They became about... power, about territory."

Hayley thought for a minute and looked at her hand, "But I have a unique ability. Because I'm a hybrid, I can control when I change! So, if this mystical marriage thing works, then- then our people get my power, and they can ditch the rings!" she started smiling at the idea, "Which means Esther no longer has a hold over them! Jack, this is exactly the answer that we've been looking for! Let's find a shaman, we'll say some vows. Hell, we'll make it a party!"

"It ain't just a party," Jackson almost snapped, looking far too unhappy with the solution than anyone else would be, "If the vows ain't honored, it doesn't work."

Hayley stiffened in her spot as she realized what it would mean for her.

"It's gotta be a real marriage, in every way, for the rest of our lives," Jackson continued, wanting Hayley to see just what she would be getting herself into, "Are you up for that?" but of course, the hybrid remained silent, "Didn't think so," Jackson bitterly returned to his wood work.

Hayley glanced back to Cami, looking torn and in quite need of help. Cami felt awful for ever picking out the excerpt in the journal. She felt like she had given Hayley an unnecessary burden of guilt. If she didn't do the marriage, the wolves would continue to work for Esther...but if she did marry, she would marry a person she didn't love.

~ 0 ~

Maleny and Amarrah were heading to Kieran's secret apartment in search of of a better explanation of the puncture wounds Amarah bore on her back. They were certainly not expecting to find Cami and Hayley lurking inside the secret room.

"What are you two doing here?" Maleny asked her blonde cousin.

Cami instantly looked to Hayley, unsure if the hybrid wanted to reveal their true purpose. Hayley was considering the marriage but things were still confusing for her so they opted for a further explanation of this mystical unification.

"I needed help with something wolf related," Hayley settled for in the meantime. She'd been glad to learn that Cami had a copy of the apartment's key, thinking they would avoid coming face to face with the others for a while...but apparently she was wrong.

"And you?" Cami asked Maleny, noticing the look on Amarrah's face.

"We have a witch problem," Maleny sighed.

"I hardly call this," Amarrah turned her back on the three and raised her hair to show the puncture wounds, "a 'problem.'"

"What the hell are those?" both Cami and Hayley asked together, horrified.

"I'm pretty sure it's a body changing spell," Amarrah turned back to them.

"But I suggested we get some more information," Maleny added in, really hoping Amarrah was wrong, "So we're here…"

Hayley looked around and growled in frustration, "This is all Esther's fault!" she exclaimed and kicked a shelf, startling the others.

"Hayley, what's wrong?" Maleny questioned, finally taking notice of her distressed demeanor.

Hayley didn't answer right away, the issue still told complicated to say in a simple answer. But when she started to speak, it only became more simple for her… she knew what she had to do.

~ 0 ~

By the time Maleny and Amarrah returned from the secret apartment, they were more than convinced Amarrah was to become the next body Esther was plotting to jump into. To say Amarrah was furious was an understatement. She was on the verge of losing it and ensuing a murder plan on Vincent and Esther. Maleny barely contained the French woman after barging into the room Finn was being kept in.

"I'm gonna kill you!" she shouted her threats to the prisoner and struggled to get free from Maleny's hold, "And don't think I'll make it fast, no! I'll make it slow and painful until you beg me to release you and kill you!"

Klaus, who'd been short from losing it against his brother mere minutes before the two women entered, looked more awed than confused, "Mal, I like your friend."

Maleny shot him a glare, "So not the time! Help me," she was barely keeping her hands on Amarrah's arm by now.

"I assume you were right in the body changing spell, then?" Klaus went on to ask Amarrah in a completely calm manner.

"Esther has done some bad things but to use my own friend like this?" Maleny said to Finn and finally released Amarrah when she seemed slightly more calm, "What the hell goes through that woman's head?"

Finn sustained a glare at the blonde, "My mother loves us all," but Maleny's scoff intervened, as well as Klaus', "She did," Finn assured, "If you only knew through the trouble she had to go through just to have us."

"We don't want to know," Maleny dismissed him with a hand but that didn't stop him.

"She was barren. She grew so desperate for a family that she begged one of the most powerful witches in history for help- her sister, Dahlia. Of course, Dahlia's price was high. She agreed to make our mother fertile, but in exchange, she sought the first-born as sacrifice. Having no other choice, our mother gave away our beloved Freya."

For a minute, Maleny almost believed him. However, Klaus was more apt to refuse all his brother's words, "Our sister died of plague."

"Esther gave her away. Think about that. The pain, the grief."

"She is a demon," Amarrah declared seconds later, "Mal's told us all about Esther but I really had doubts. Now I know she really is the devil."

"The quicker you learn that the better chances of survival," Klaus sarcastically pointed at her.

"She loves us more than you realize," Finn snapped at him.

"And is love the reason she wanted my child dead?" the hybrid turned on him angrily.

"She was trying to protect you from Dahlia's curse!"

Klaus lost all patience and screamed, "WHAT CURSE?"

"Dahlia demanded the first-born of every generation. Had your child lived, she would have paid the price! And, if anyone had tried to protect her, Dahlia would come and destroy us all."

While Klaus had all death glare on the brother, too frazzled to think, Maleny to consider the value of Finn's words. Hope lived...and if Dahlia was real...would she be coming for them right now?

"Can I have a word with your brother?" Amarrah's cold tone broke through the silence in the room, "I have a bone to pick with you and your mother," she glared at Finn.

Klaus could care less what the woman had in mind at the moment. He motioned for her to go ahead and went for the doors, "Stay far away from him," he warned Maleny who nodded just to keep him at ease.

"Alright, Finn," Amarrah was now in front of Finn, her arms crossed, "What the hell, man? I meet you for two weeks," she raised her index finger, "and you plot to convert me into your mother's vessel?"

Finn looked confused for a minute, something Maleny easily saw, "Unless...was that not the plan?" she slowly asked.

"My mother wasn't preparing you for herself," Finn began, "She was preparing you for Rebekah."

Amarrah's eyes widened at the revelation, although somehow she felt a little more relieved to know it would be Rebekah who could enter her body rather than the demon Esther was.

"But why her?" Maleny asked, sparing Amarrah a glance, "No offense - but why her, Finn? You've been here for months now and you go with the French woman who barely arrived to the Quarter?"

"My mother sent me to do the task but I couldn't find someone to fit the category," Finn explained, "And then you showed up," he looked at Amarrah who continued glaring, "You were foreign, and you had nobody."

"And if I refuse to allow such a thing to happen?" Amarrah challenged, "Do not forget my family is one of the most powerful covens there are."

"By the time you reach them or they reach you it will be over and Rebekah will have taken your body," Finn calmly said, seeing it was obvious.

Distressed, Amarrah ran her hands through her black hair, "No! Absolutely not!" she exclaimed, turning to Maleny, "Mal, I've grown to love you ever since I was a little girl and learned of your story...and I know your friend Rebekah wouldn't want to hurt me but I would rather die than let her take over my body."

Maleny could understand the perspective in which Amarrah saw the whole situation. After all, it was the other end of her cycle, the one she felt overly guilty about to that day, "You will not have your life stolen," she put a hand on Amarrah's arm, "I promise you. We'll find a way. If I have to take Esther's deal myself to get you out of this I will."

And she meant that. Completely.

Maleny would never forgive herself for allowing someone else to take her friend's body like she'd done so many times in the past. This time, she could prevent it...and if it meant taking Esther's deal for herself then so be it.

Maleny's thoughts were broken by the loud sound of doors breaking. Immediately she looked around the room to see if it had been something by Finn's hand until she remembered he was still perfectly bound to the magic-cancelling shackles. Amarrah too became intrigued, and partly scared Esther had already begun to do part of a spell against her.

"What the hell is that?" Maleny mumbled to herself as the sounds continued. The more minutes passed by, the better the noises were reconfigured to those of...fighting.

"This is part of Esther's plan, isn't it?" Amarrah hurried up to Maleny, "Oh my God, is it starting now?"

Maleny had no idea what it could be but she was going to go find out. She ran out the ballroom doors with Amarrah behind her. They both came into the courtyard where sure enough there was fighting - Klaus and Davina. Marcel had been knocked out by the stairs, thus allowing the fight to continue.

"What are you doing!?" Maleny horrifically shouted to the two who took no notice of her nor Amarrah.

Davina's head was oozing with blood while Klaus had less blood on him yet with pieces of wood in his clothes from assumed attacks.

"Stop it!" Maleny ordered but her tone implied she was more desperate than anything. She didn't want to see either get hurt, specifically the weakest - Davina - who could easily die.

"Mal…" Amarrah too grew concerned as Klaus flung Davina down a hallway, causing the teen to bleed from an arm.

"Klaus, stop!" Maleny cried and made to run for them when Amarrah grabbed her by the arm.

"You'll get hurt, are you crazy?" the French woman hissed.

"Such hubris!" laughed Klaus, "And from one who bleeds so easily!"

Davina had risen from her spot on the floor, smirking at the hybrid across her, "You talk such a big game, but you couldn't even kill Mikael when you had the chance! He was right about you, you know? You're weak."

Losing his temper, Klaus sped towards her and grabbed her by the hair, getting ready to sink his teeth into her neck. Davina screamed in pain at the contact but it didn't last long before Klaus felt something weird in his throat. He let her go as he choked, gasping for needed air.

"Davina, stop!" Maleny tried shaking off Amarrah from her but now it was the French woman who had a tight grip on her arm, "Both of you!"

Her cries were of no use as Klaus fell to the floor, unconscious and Davina stood straight, triumphant over her apparent victory.

When Amarrah felt like it was over, she promptly released Maleny and so the blonde dashed over to where Klaus was. Amarrah slowly went to follow and joined Davina's side, "What exactly did you do to him?"

"I channeled dark objects through my blood to poison him," the teen shrugged, not at all guilty for her actions.

"Well reverse it!" Maleny ordered her angrily, now beside Klaus' body, "I swear to God Davina I will forget every ounce of friendship we have right now if you don't reverse the spell."

Davina furrowed her brow in confusion, "You would seriously make me bring him back after all he's done to me?"

"I am so tired of the same stupid story!" Maleny rose to her feet, startling Davina with the loud boom of her tone, "I get it, Davina, and I am so sorry for all that he's done to you - I really am. But you have no right to kill him. What would that do to you, hm? How the hell is that supposed to help you in any way?" she deeply sighed, "I am so tired of you two and this stupid hatred."

"Well, I'm sorry," Davina crossed her arms, genuinely feeling bad for putting Maleny into that position. After everything, Davina still cared for the blonde witch and just wanted her to be safe and happy...if only that happiness didn't depend on the hybrid.

"I'm sorry too," Maleny nodded, seeing Kol coming out from his prison room without the shackles, "Because you're gonna find out what it's like being in my position fairly soon, I imagine."

Confused, Davina stared at her until Kol sneaked up behind her, "Hey!" he greeted her and made her flinch in surprise.

"How did you get free!?" she turned to him in excitement.

"Oh, it's a long story," Kol shrugged and looked down at his older brother, "Better question is, if he's not dead, then what are you gonna do when he recovers?" he'd heard of Davina's actions as he'd came for them.

"Nothing," Maleny said before Davina could, "She's going to do nothing."

"Mal-"

"NO!" the blonde finally snapped and screamed at the teen, "I am done with all of this. You have tired me out," she accused Davina, "just like he has," she pointed to Klaus.

"Mal," Amarrah gently grabbed Maleny's arm and tugged her to her side, "It's okay," she said softly and looked at Davina, "Look, I get your head if full of this revenge stuff but I'm gonna need you to let it go - not for her sake," she nodded to Maleny, "nor for yours, but for mine."

"Why?" Davina frowned.

"Because Esther has prepared my body for Rebekah Mikaelson to jump into and I need witches to help me. In the end, sweetheart, you always help out your kind."

"Mal, I swear I didn't know about that," Kol quickly raised his hands in neutrality towards the blonde, "That...was not my task."

"Yeah, I know," Maleny mumbled, still too affected from the earlier fight, "It was all Finn. So, since I suppose you're with us now - otherwise you'd still be tortured - you're gonna help Amarrah."

"What!?" Davina was now glaring at Kol for what she'd just heard, "You're with them now?"

Around that time, Marcel came around and quickly rose to his feet as he gathered his bearings. Seeing Klaus on the floor and unconscious, he figured what had happened and walked to the group.

"He's with us," he assured the two women, "And we're going to be going up against Esther, assuming Klaus is... upright."

Kol tried withstanding Davina's look on him as he tried to explain himself to her, " Look, Nik is a pain in the ass, but, well... she's a problem for us all."

"Klaus is the problem! I don't give a damn what happens to Esther," Davina angrily snapped and promptly heard the clearing of Amarrah's throat.

"Hello," the French woman waved a hand, "I kinda do and I'll put this to you in terms you can understand: you're going to help me because you're going to help me. Don't make me reverse the spell myself because that would only complicate things between you and her," she once again nodded to Maleny.

Davina sighed and looked around, knowing she was easily going to lose there and then. This was her victory and they were taking it away from her!

Maleny had enough and stepped forwards, "Davina if you do this to me you would be the biggest hypocrite," she pointed to Kol and forewarned him, "I'm sorry," before she looked at Davina again, "Kol is no angel either. He slaughtered a near village every now and then."

"Hey," Kol muttered, unhappy this had somehow turned on him.

"Making a point," Maleny snapped before she continued, "Even Marcel had a tyrant air in this Quarter and don't you dare say no," she warned Marcel before the man even opened his mouth.

"I can't believe you're playing this card on me," Davina said, frowning deeper.

"I can't believe you're making me," countered Maleny, "You know I'm right so do it. I don't want to have to explain to Amarrah's mother why her daughter was overtaken by someone else due to my friend's inability to get past her revenge plan."

Amarrah hugged herself, slightly nervous, "Exactly how long do I have until Esther starts?" she asked Kol.

"Well, now that Esther knows where Rebekah's hiding... not long. The only way to stop it is to stop her."

Amarrah then raised an eyebrow at Davina, "Seriously? You're gonna leave me hanging here?"

Davina gave in with a deep sigh, "No, of course not," and she couldn't turn away an innocent who needed help.

~ 0 ~

Hayley and Cami were coming towards the chosen meeting place of the wolves. After talking, Hayley had decided she was going to marry Jackson. It wasn't something she was completely excited over but it also wasn't something she was despising.

"So…" Cami cleared her throat, feeling awkward for a reason, "...you sure you want to do this?" she asked Hayley slowly.

"Well, I outweighed the problems with the goodness and I think this can work," Hayley said, slowly feeling more sure of the plan.

"You mean for the pack or...between you and Jackson?" Cami spared her a glance, "Because let's be honest, Hayley, you're not in love with him."

Hayley came to a stop and turned to her, "No, I'm not. But maybe I can grow to be."

"Are you sure that's what you want, though?" Cami turned to her as well, making a face at the idea, "I always thought getting married should be because you're already in love with your fiancee."

"For us," Hayley gestured between them, "that's not what happens. Fairytales are for humans, Cami - something neither of us are."

"I'm not trying to talk you out of it nor push you to do it," Cami clarified, "I just want you to be completely sure. I don't want you doing something just because you feel there's no more hope...for anything."

Hayley tilted her head and soon enough realized Cami had been hinting at Elijah, the topic having become almost a taboo for the hybrid since lately.

"Cami, I feel like lately we've become closer - I like to think of us as friends…"

Cami lightly smiled, feeling the same, "Yeah, I think so too."

"So, as a friend," Hayley placed a hand on Cami's shoulder, firmly speaking, "and as a decent woman, I am telling you face to face that I did hold feelings for Elijah but that's in the past, I swear."

Cami instantly blushed and backed off, "I-I never...ever...said anything about that," she stuttered to speak freely, "And if you do like Elijah then you should go for it - never mind me."

Hayley was very amused by the blonde's demeanor, "Oh, I think even if I wanted to it wouldn't matter anymore. Besides, that's in the past and it's gonna stay there. I had my chance and I didn't take it."

"Doesn't mean there's anything blocking you right now," Cami raised her hands, "I'm not, I mean...I'm like…" she stepped to the side, gesturing, "...moving away, okay?"

"Cami," Hayley was unable to hold in her laugh, "Really, it's okay. I don't mind if you want something with him-"

"I don't!" the blonde defensively exclaimed, growing redder by the minute.

"Ooh you're gonna be fun to tease," Hayley beamed and began to walk again, "Just like Mal."

"Hayley!" Cami, exasperated, rushed after her, "I don't understand, and…"

"Well I'll make it clearer for you," Hayley stuffed her hands in her jacket's pockets, "Any feelings I had for Elijah are slowly dying and I'm okay with it. I know that there's something brewing between you two and I'll honestly be happy for you."

Cami was horrified to hear all that but at the same time couldn't help feel slightly relieved.

Hayley looked at the blonde with an expectant smile, "And I hope that you will be happy for me at my wedding."

Slowly, Cami calmed and smiled back, "Of course. But I'm telling you right now when Maleny finds out about this she's gonna make a big deal about this. I'm talking about big wedding dress and party."

"Well I say after living a thousand years never getting one for herself she deserves to plan one," Hayley said, "But I'm setting this straight as of right now: nothing pink. I hate pink."

Cami laughed alongside her and the two continued towards the meeting.

~ 0 ~

Maleny walked back to the breakfast table where Kol and Davina were, Kol hungrily picking at the different foods from the plates.

"Amarrah's waiting," she announced then coldly added, "Kol."

Davina sighed at the purposely left out name of hers, "I get it Mal, you're angry with me. I woke Klaus up already, lighten up."

While it was true and the hybrid himself was busily preparing something for Finn with Marcel, Maleny refused to let it go. She meant what she said: She was tired.

"Kol, Amarrah would like to discuss more things about this vessel spell," she said instead.

Davina sighed louder, "Mal, c'mon."

"Kol?" Maleny expectantly waited for the teen.

"I'm on it…" he nodded, "...right after I have myself a well deserved breakfast."

"KOL!"

"I'm hungry!" he argued, "I'm like you now remember? I need actual food to survive. Amarrah can wait another ten minutes."

"Can she really?" she challenged but even her glare didn't work on him.

At that moment, Klaus entered the room looking far more content than earlier, "Provided you're not busy concocting a new paralytic to use against me, I'd like a word with my brother," he addressed Davina firstly.

"Well, to be honest, I can't stand being around you anyways," she rolled her eyes.

"Mal, I happened to have heard a phone call from your bedroom," Klaus glanced at the blonde but received the same silent treatment as Davina had, "Might have been urgent - it went off three times."

Maleny ignored him and picked up an apple from the table.

Davina couldn't help smirk, "She's doing it to you too, ha."

Klaus was less than amused, "Maleny, this is no time for petty cold shoulders."

Maleny spared him a glance before biting into her apple and turned to leave. Kol snickered and took a seat at the edge of the table, "Ah, the cold treatments from Maleny were the most amusing thing about her. Glad I'm not on the receiving end," but just before he was about to take a bite from his meal, something hit him on his temple.

An apple. A bitten apple.

"Hey!" Kol frowned as Maleny glanced back.

"Keep it up and you'll be on the receiving end, I promise," the blonde snapped and went on her way.

Kol rolled his eyes and returned to his meal, but not before remarking to Klaus, "You sure know how to pick them, don't you?"

Before Klaus could respond back his phone went off, and seeing it was Rebekah he left the room to go answer. He didn't need either of the teens hearing anything suspicious.

~ 0 ~

Maleny had retreated to her room where she checked her cellphone and sure enough it had rung three times like Klaus had told her. They all belonged to Hayley, but no voicemail had been left. She wondered what her friend could need now. She surely didn't seem alright after telling them all about mystical marriage she was considering.

Perhaps she should call back…

But then someone knocked on her open door.

"Maleny, it's urgent," Klaus stepped into the room, his voice exhibiting the urgency he spoke about. Things had gotten worse and he really could do without the silent treatment of the witch.

Maleny continued scrolling down her phone as if he weren't there.

"Mal, it's Elijah," he tried again and this time at least got her to look at him, "Rebekah called and told me Elijah slaughtered a dozen people in a diner."

Maleny's eyes widened in horror, that wasn't the Elijah they all knew.

"Esther's torture must have affected him more deeply than I'd realized. We need to go to them now. So please, leave behind your senseless anger-"

"My anger is pretty justified," Maleny cut him off there and then, "I told Davina and now I'm telling you: I'm tired. I am so done with the hatred between you two. This fight could've been the end of Davina or yours."

"She came looking for me," Klaus reminded, growing angry himself, "and I gave her what she wanted."

"And look where that had you? She tricked you and I'm pretty sure her plans for you afterwards involved chaining you up somewhere," Maleny threw her phone to the bed, frustrated, "Dammit! I care for both of you and I just want you both alive, don't you see? Why can't I live in a world where my boyfriend and friend…" her voice trailed off when she realized what she said and quickly corrected herself, "Where my friend," she pointed at Klaus warning him to stay quiet, though his smirk spoke a thousand words, "and my friend can get along…"

Though Klaus struggled to keep his mouth shut concerning her slip up, he spoke without a trace of it, "Mal, I'm sorry you were put in this position - honestly the last thing I want is to hurt you. But please, can you accompany me somewhere?"

Suspicious, she stayed where she was, "Where to?"

"To see my daughter of course," Klaus shared a smile with her, "I'd like for her to meet you."

Maleny felt the air leave her lungs, now completely turning to him, "A-and Hayley?"

"Well get her on the way. But will you come, please?"

"Amarrah…"

"Will be taken care of, I promise. As much as Davina hates me I don't think she would turn her wrath on the innocent witch."

Maleny pursed her lips together and gave a small nod, "Okay. But don't think you're free of the scolding you deserve," she warned and took his hand.

"Oh I wouldn't dream of it," Klaus rolled his eyes, "I'm sure you'll be taking care of that throughout the drive there," but he would rather hear her scolding and shouting than the silent treatment she so perfectly gave.

#the originals #klaus mikaelson #ocappreciation #ocapp #the originals fics #klaus mikaelson fics #klaus mikaelson imagines #the originals imagines #tvd fics #oc: Maleny Rowan #fic: the girl in the forest

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purplesurveys · 4 years

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Do you have any friends who are on and off with bfs/gfs all the time? Yeah, Jo and Aya don’t make the most stable couple. They had one really problematic stint last year where they would break up and get back together every week. They ironed it out eventually and they’ve been ok for a while, but lately I think it’s a little rocky again because I no longer see them interacting and they’ve been retweeting stuff that gives me a few hints. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve broken it off for good. When was the last time you almost cried out of exhaustion? Ohhhh boy. It was some day in Feb I think? and everything had just been going wrong for me. Andrew and I got yelled at by our thesis adviser because she didn’t like what we submitted and she gave us a day to revise three entire chapters. We stayed in the college working away from 3 PM to 10 PM then when I got home, I realized I forgot to bring with me a certain item that my org entrusted me with. Absolutely wasn’t allowed to lose it. Had a panic attack and this was when I started crying because it was so late and I just wanted to go to bed; though Andrew saved my ass by offering to go back to school at like 11:30 just to retrieve the damn thing. Lastly, that was a time when business reporting was still giving me hell and I was struggling to find a business story around campus to turn in for that week, so I was freaking out about that too. All in all a shit day. What`s a TV show you hate missing? Idk man, if I miss a show I don’t think there’d be hate attached to it. I imagine I’d miss a show because it made me happy, so this doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. Do you think it’s funny how people always say their pet is the best ever? It’s adorable haha but not necessarily funny. Whenever someone says it I totally believe them; I think all pets are the best :) When did you last brush your teeth? This morning.

What was the last website (besides this one) that you visited? I checked my Twitter right before this question. Do you have a friend who you think you’ll be best friends with forever? Yes, Angela is for keeps. Does it annoy you when you accidentally delete things? For the most part I can just undo and get the deleted thing back, but when that’s not applicable it can get super distressing. I know I was gloomy for a very long time when I accidentally wiped out my camera roll with photos from 2014-2016. What`s a movie / book / TV show / band / whatever you highly recommend? Movie: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off Book: Got nothing in this department. Show: BoJack Horseman Band: Paramore ha. They got a sound for almost everyone! When did you last use a dictionary / thesaurus? Two questions ago when I was looking for an adjective to best describe what it’s like to lose your entire camera roll and, essentially, good memories that you’ve made. Are you anticipating or dreading anything? I ammmmmm anticipating dinner haha. I can’t think of anything I’m dreading.

If someone could randomly give you something right now what would you like? Baked sushi :( It’s a recent trend locally and it looks so gooddddd, I just don’t wanna spend the last of my savings on it or ask my parents to buy a tray for me. What`s the most annoying thing in the world? At the moment it’s people who refuse to wear masks because they claim that it messes with their oxygen level or because they find it personally uncomfortable. When did you last use one of those water slides you put on hills? I have no clue what you mean. What are you sitting on right now? One of the dining room chairs. What skills would you like to learn / develop? Adobe Indesign and iMovie. I dabbled with these recently – Indesign for a class and iMovie to make a video for Gabie – and though I was always too scared to start using programs like these, I actually found them fun and super useful when I finally had my hands on them. When we saw each other the other day Gab was talking about using this break to take up workshops in different Adobe programs so that she’ll have more stuff to put on her resumé, so I might follow her footsteps too. What is something other people say you’re good at but you think you’re not? Teaching. I always feel like I fumble a lot, but idk I get compliments on it so I guess I’m kinda okay but I just don’t see it. What does your bedside lamp look like? I don’t have one. I used to have a wall light though. It was a just tiny lil bulb that I had to plug in to give my room a light orange hue. What did you last take a photograph of? Myself and Cooper. When was the last time you got really frustrated with technology? Yesterday. My laptop was a bit slow when I wanted my YouTube video to go full-screen, and my impatient ass already got irritated with it. What was the last funny thing someone said to you? She didn’t technically ‘say’ it but my mom was singing a song earlier and had the lyrics wrong, and what came out of her mouth instead was so wrong and so funny. Who taught you to tie your shoelaces? My grandmother. What was the last thing you bought? I bought snacks from my girlfriend’s dad Korean food business! I got myself odeng (fishcakes) and tteokbokki (spicy rice cake) :) Do you want to move to somewhere else? If so, where? Any country with a capable government at this point. What time is it where you are? 8:04 PM. What’s your favourite picture of yourself as a child? I’m not sharing that on here, but I do have my favorites.

Do you like your neighbours? I suppose they’re okay, in a sense that they haven’t done anything to annoy me. I’ve never talked to them in the last 12 years that I’ve lived here though haha I always felt like my mom could take care of the socializing stuff – and she has been. Does your room need to be cleaned? Nah I’m barely in it these days. It’s mostly spotless and things are stacked up neatly. Do you have a good relationship with your family? I wouldn’t say it’s good, but it’s not bad. Super lacking in the emotional aspect, though, and it’s a big reason why at the end of the day I can’t call it a good relationship. What is something people are surprised to hear about you? That I don’t like fruits. The horrified gasps and expressions never get old. Do you make judgments about people straight after meeting them? Only if they blatantly act like a jerk. Do you hate any particular groups of people? I mean I hate racists, abusers, rapists, Karens... but if you mean to ask if I hate any race or people of a certain sexual/gender orientation then most definitely not. Do you fall up or down stairs usually? Down :( Do you constantly break things? (By mistake or otherwise) HAHA yes. What was the last bug you saw? Kinda looked like a moth but I’m not sure what it was exactly. Are there any smells which make you feel nauseous? Rotten egg, any fruits lol. What is the scariest thing you`ve ever gone through? Random men play-lunging at me when I’m walking outside and then laughing once I jump or whimper. I don’t know if there’s a certain script that those fucking pigs follow, but I’ve had several of the exact same experiences through the years. That’s why my friends can always poke fun at the fact that I drive everywhere no matter how close my destination is – at least I feel safest that way. Do you have anything unusual in your bag? No. I only carried the essentials in the last bag I used when I went out the other day. Are there any people you know in real life that you only talk to online? Yeah, there’s a bunch of people I don’t really get to see irl. Some of them are friends who’ve migrated, some are my friends’ parents, my relatives who’ve always lived in the US, etc. Do you think people who don`t care about education are dumb? In the Philippines they will definitely be considered careless, dumb, and having no ambition. But I know education isn’t as big of a priority in other countries and that college isn’t a necessity in those places, so I guess there’s a cultural difference here. What`s your favourite key on a keyboard? I don’t pick favorite keyboard buttons lol. Do you always finish what you start? Nah I’m a little terrible at that, especially if we’re talking of passion projects. I collected Starbucks planners for like six years and was never able to completely fill up any one of them. Who`s your favourite character from The Simpsons? Or do you hate that show? I’m not a big fan of the show but just because I relate to her a lot and the fact that she’s intelligent and a goody-two-shoes, Lisa. Have you ever had any friends who always tried to steal your things? Nah wtf? I’d so easily stop talking to them if all they did was steal from me lmao What is something you will never understand? People!!! Who!!! Aren’t!!! Nice!!! To!!! Servers/Baristas/Anyone working in a job that has to directly deal with customers!!! When did you last laugh hysterically? Probably earlier this afternoon watching a Good Mythical Morning episode.

#survey #surveys

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sprinkledonion-blog · 5 years

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Another real long “I don’t like Bumbleby” post (Part 1)

So this one was a long time coming. I kept postponing it, polishing it, making it look the nicest I could, but it’s finally here. And it’s quite long. Let’s just, uh, start.

The first thing I wanna say is, I watched RWBY without interacting with the FNDM, just at the start of this year. I didn’t know what Bumbleby was, nor its impact in the overall FNDM. I was blissfully unaware of what was going on, so I dived in with a clean, open mind.

First impressions and development (or the lack thereof)

I didn’t think about Bumbleby. For those who know me, I ship characters VERY easily and I don’t really care if it’s a gay, het, lesbian ship, I can and I WILL ship them. I shipped Ruby and Penny like crazy. Ruby and Emerald made my heart jump. Jaune and Ren looked insanely cute together, and Sun and Weiss had very nice potential. And in V2, in the Burning the Candle episode, when Yang had a heartfelt conversation with Blake, and hugged her, I was like “oh?”. It was the first time I had seen Yang this vulnerable, and while I really ignored her through the first volume, this scene made me realize she was more than it meets the eye. And she chose to be vulnerable… with Blake. Oh?

Then Blacksun happened. Oh.

I didn’t like Blacksun. I still don’t like it. It’s predictable and boring for my tastes. But it has a privilege Bumbleby doesn’t: development.

I will never understand this choice. Barb said it was planned from the beginning. The question is, then: why didn’t y’all spend time developing Bumbleby? Bees will tell me it was developed, but I’ll suggest y’all to take off your rose-colored glasses and revise those interactions. I totally understand the warm, fuzzy feeling when your ship talk, even look at each other (my ships are 99% rareships so I take what I can get), but deep down you know reality isn’t like that. I’ve seen the 40-minute essay about Bumbleby; yes, you can attribute to every interaction a romantic feeling, but I can do the exact same with Jaune and Ren, and fans will roll their eyes at me and tell me it isn’t like that. The only remotely romantic interaction was the whole Burning the Candle episode. It was a nice episode.

“But Onion”, y’all will say, “are you going to ignore V3 onwards? The plot completely ties Blake and Yang together”. Same as Blake and Sun. Yes, Yang lost an arm for Blake, and yes, she feels betrayed and everything, but… why should I think it’s romantic? Blacksun is being developed at the same time, following common romance tropes that apply to the rest of canon ships, so why should I think it’s any different? Yang could have lost an arm for Weiss and I have no doubt she’d have felt the same. (I also think Weiss would have called her and checked on her every day, until Yang even heard her in dreams.)

That brings me to my second point. Let’s trust Barb, it was planned from the beginning. Then what was Blacksun supposed to be? “It makes the point that romantic relationships don’t always work and sometimes it’s better to stay as friends.” Valid point, but… Blake? Sun? Why did you keep at it? Blake, why did you kiss him on the cheek? That’s misleading, for the audience I mean (Sun already knows the script). When I friendzoned guys, and when the girls I know friendzoned guys, absolutely none of them kissed the dude on the cheek. The most they did was give a pat on the back or shoulder. Let me know if it’s an American thing to kiss guys you friendzone, because maybe it’s the cultural barrier that keeps me from understanding “yes, they’re friends and nothing more!”.

And yes, I know Sun told Neptune it was never about that. What was it about then, Sun? Were you trying to get Weiss’ attention by making her jealous? Were you trying to get Blake to paid for the food? I don’t buy that Sun explicitly flirted with her just to be friends. Else I’m an alien and it’s my second day on Earth, or Sun tried to convince himself to feel less pain. Or who knows? Maybe he really was flirting with her to be friends. Maybe he flirted with Neptune too. Writers, give us proper answers. And no, FNDM, filling in the story holes with “show don’t tell, there’s a logical explanation for it” is still fanon and doesn’t count as canon. Show don’t tell is a rule, not an excuse.

Anyways, after the whole coming and going, Sun finally leaves the scene for Bumbleby to thrive on sudden romantic interactions, which are a little late at most. It’s confusing. Yang never felt jealous when Blake showed attraction to Sun. They didn’t choose to clearly spend time together, at least with the “we’re partners” excuse. I’ll delve into this point later, but for now: we had Blacksun, suddenly we have Bumbleby, and we’re supposed to have been cheering for them the whole time. Uhm, was this supposed to be a plot twist?

Okay, I may be biased on this one, but listen to me. I don’t like this kind of plot twist. Oh, we have a heterosexual couple… OR SO YOU THOUGHT! THE TRUTH IS THAT THE LESBIANS ARE CANON! WE’VE TRICKED YOU, WHAT MADMEN WE ARE!

Get it? My problem isn’t that Blacksun isn’t canon. My problem is that the writers are using a wlw relationship as a tool, a surprise, manipulating and tricking the audience. It doesn’t feel genuine--it feels like they just wanted to cause controversy--or sell. At the end of the day, Bumbleby is way more popular than Blacksun, and a big part of the FNDM came for the bees. Don’t y’all ever wonder why voice actors don’t talk as much about other characters, or Ruby herself? The main main character?

Let’s bee honest: at this point in time, the biggest thing keeping RWBY afloat is Bumbleby.

“And what’s the problem with all that?”, bees may ask. “What’s wrong with feeding us some good bees?” Ship whatever you want, y’all. But I don’t like getting ships shoved down my throat and treated as peak LGBT+ representation when it didn’t get the time and treatment it deserved. Not all that glitters is gold, guys. (Especially Yang.)

Racism

Oh boy.

Racism is quite the great deal in Remnant… at least that’s what the show tells us. It doesn’t show it. No, Velvet doesn’t need to get stones thrown at her to show us discrimination. But, you know… if there was discrimination, I don’t think she would be in Beacon in the first place. Or that Leonardo would be the headmaster of Haven… Adam Taurus, pack your things and go home; there’s no faunus discrimination worth the fight. (Wait! Don’t go yet, you still have work to do.)

What does racism has to do with Bumbleby?, you may ask. Well, it’s Blake’s main plot. I think it has a lot to do with Bumbleby… but uh, it seems I was wrong. Yang isn’t interested in it, so I guess it’s just Blake’s problem. Until uh, Adam makes a scene, but that doesn’t have much to do with the fact he’s a faunus. It’s still pretty distasteful of a human to kill a faunus, but I’ll tackle that point a bit later.

Blake’s faunity? is very important to her. If she’s an important person to Yang, why doesn’t Yang show interest in it? She didn’t even defend Velvet, even though she could have punched Cardin in the face. She sits around sighing “It must be hard to be a faunus” and annoys Blake with a lighter. This only shows me Yang doesn’t care about Blake’s identity, and not in a good way.

I know, I know, I take the faunus issue to heart. It must be because I’m a person of color. I could talk hours and hours about the horrendous execution of faunus racism (reinforcing stereotypes, horrible analogies and really unfortunate implications), but I’ll limit myself to Blake for now.

Yang doesn’t care. She’s not one bit interested in reading faunus’ history, in asking Blake about her experiences, in thinking how she could help as a human. She’s like those people who say “I’m blind to race” as if it were a good thing. Yeah, you don’t discriminate, but you dismiss other people’s culture and background. It’s part of who we are. Some of us will take it better, some of us worse, but acknowledging Blake’s identity in this case could do wonders. That way Yang could show interest in her as a person, her motives to fight, her struggle.

But she didn’t. In fact, she did quite the contrary.

Bonus: I’ve recently seen a… hysterical headcanon. As it turns out, some bees were excited at the idea of Blake getting branded and Yang going berserk, later saving all the faunus in the mine. It was supposedly justified by “faunus needed a reason to respect her” and of course, Bumbleby angst. Do I need to point out the White Savior trope and how blatantly racist and harmful it is? Do I really need to? Considering faunus are supposed to represent the civil rights movement? Especially knowing Adam’s previous treatment? If faunus were explicitly Black, this would be… well, this is a disaster, but it gets swept under the rug. As a woman of color, this headcanon just makes me want to cry.

I think I’ll have to divide it into two parts so it doesn’t get too heavy. Part 2 is here.

#bumbleby rant #rwde #rwby #rwby rant

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womping-grounds · 4 years

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Follower Milestone + Original Content? o_O

So, uh, I guess I hit 350 followers, which just, wow! You guys are awesome; I’m honoured and humbled that you all wanna stick around!

Also, I’ve been wanting to post some of my own writing for a while, and now I finally have something ready! The scene below is much-revised, but it’s essentially still a version of the first piece of writing that I ever did about my main OC from over twenty years ago.

The setting is Forgotten Realms/D&D style fantasy, mixed with some original worlds and elements of my own. Hopefully I’ll be posting more snippets of the story soon! ------------------------------------------------------------

Kierst-thara’s ashen eyebrows furrowed as she tried for what seemed like the thousandth time to reach her powers. The only result, as it had been with every previous attempt, was a sudden flare of agony that left her gasping and slumped against the wall of her cell.

She stared miserably at the sickly glowing webs that clung to the rough stone around her--webs no creature as pleasant as a spider had ever made--and let out a ragged cry of frustration. In the dim light, she could make out misshapen lumps in the cages across from her; leftovers from necromantic experiments too disturbing to consider. The stench of decaying flesh was nauseating, but her stomach was long empty of anything to bring up.

Kierst-thara had no way of knowing how long she’d been left alone here, with only narrow metal bars keeping her confined. She’d spent her life up until this point needing no more than a moment’s concentration to phase through even the densest of stone. Now that she was unable to de-materialize so much as a fingertip, it seemed an added cruelty to be trapped by such a thin barrier.

She supposed she should be grateful that her captors seemed to have forgotten about her, but it would make little difference if she couldn’t escape before they returned. Dread writhed through her mind, whispering that they would indeed be back, and she’d be helpless once more against whatever new torments they had planned.

Kierst-thara shuddered and hugged her arms tightly around herself, even though the movement triggered renewed throbs of pain from the many wounds marring her body. She gritted her teeth, trying to block out the flood of memories that threatened to overwhelm her.

No, no! She wrenched her thoughts away from that span of time before she’d been abandoned in the dungeon. She couldn’t bear to have the images and sensations of what Raine had done to her start looping through her mind’s eye again.

She had to focus on something--anything else, but she kept circling back to the ones who’d had a hand in her current wretched state. Mordred, the powerful spellcaster who’d ripped Kierst-thara from her home to be used as a pawn in some convoluted scheme; the warlord Tarnish, manic and bloodthirsty as she'd unleashed her devastating talent; and Raine...

Everything had moved so quickly; perhaps there was no way Kierst-thara could have turned events to her advantage. Still, a cynical inner voice insisted that it must be her fault; her own foolish choices had led her here. With no way to escape her current predicament, and no hope of rescue to distract her, Kierst-thara’s exhausted mind returned to its pointless accounting of all the ways she’d failed to save herself.

#my writing #womp #kierst-thara #follower milestone #opening scene #mine

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thedistantstorm · 5 years

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Keep On Rising (Until The Sky Knows Your Name) 14

A story about how an orphaned Amanda Holliday comes to belong in the Last Safe City and the family she finds along the way.

(Or, the story of how Commander Zavala finds himself responsible for one Amanda Holliday.)

Chapters: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13

This time: Eva and Hideo and Holliday. A chain reaction.

It doesn't take much to get the faction rep's attention. A few key words, some very pointed, hushed phrases.

"I know it is not a common occurrence," She tells the Speaker, who though she cannot see his face, she is sure he looks on with something akin to compassion and maybe amusement. He is a very intelligent man. Frighteningly so to most, but incredibly benevolent all the same. "But I cannot believe the orphanage would deny him without at least looking at his application. He might not be a member of the faction but I would think he does enough for them - and this City," She tuts. "I just feel so awful for him."

All of it is true, and yet she packages up that truth and tries to sell it like Tess does. The younger woman would be proud.

Hideo himself comes over. "Excuse me," He says politely enough, pressing his palms together like a prayer, "I couldn't help but overhear your conversation. The Commander is trying to bring home a child?"

"I could not believe it either, dear," Eva gushes in her best impression of borderline senile. She isn't that old, she thinks with an internalized sigh, but it does the trick. "He told me he'd just gotten the application filled out and was going to tell her the good news, but they transferred her out of nowhere. The new facility won't listen to the old one, and you know how Zavala is. Wants to do everything the right way, even if it tears him up inside."

"That's horrible," Hideo agrees. "You said they denied him, though."

"Oh! I did," Eva agrees. The Speaker casually moves back to his observatory, his work done. "Did you know they require you to be a faction backer to adopt a handicapped child?"

"Well, I'm sure it's to make sure they have the financial well-being…"

"It's just so sad, Executor. This is Zavala we're talking about. The Commander always plays fair, and yet he's beating himself up inside because his position does not allow him to play favorites, even if he wanted to." She sighs, wistfully, watching as the man's hand came up to stroke his chin in consideration. "And the poor girl must be inconsolable. The bond between them is just… Those refugee children are so tough, and then this one…" See shakes her head.

"Let…" Hideo looks up to her, his dark eyes soft yet calculating. "Let me see what I can do. You said this child was handicapped? We support the most vulnerable members of our population. If this child is at one of New Monarchy's facilities, perhaps I can intervene."

Eva smiles a teary smile. "Oh, that would just be the most wonderful thing, dear." He calls over one of his men, who takes the information from her. After, she pats his hand, thanking him profusely for his kindness.

"I'll see to this myself," He promises.

He returns to his nook, already issuing instructions. Eva hides her grin behind her hand, returning to her stall. For now, all she can do is wait. She can't imagine it will take very long for the Executor to set things to rights for his 'dear friend.'

It takes the better part of a week. She knows because there are Consensus meetings that call away the majority of the Tower's top players, and when she checks in on Zavala, he still has that sad glimmer in his eye, but clearly others have started to notice.

Ikora is standing across from his desk, looking down at him with something Eva takes a moment to realize is concern. She retracts her hand from the doorframe, intending to return later, by nothing escapes Ikora's notice.

"Come in," The Warlock Vanguard says, not unkind and yet brisk om her delivery.

Eva knows better than to say no, and Zavala waves to an unoccupied chair in a non-verbal invitation of his own.

"Zavala informed me of the situation," Ikora tells her. "And that you've offered to assist."

"I have." She looks to Zavala. He looks older like this. "You need to take care of yourself. What if things happen quickly?"

"They won't."

"They might. This one put on quite a scene the other day." Ikora looks so sarcastic. Eva thinks it's a shame. She's such a beautiful woman, and so powerful too. Then, her eyes soften a touch. "My Hidden reported a rather interesting conversation, with the Speaker, no less."

Zavala looks to Ikora, but her gaze is trained on Eva's face. The youngest of them shrugs.

"Whatever was said," Ikora finally turns to Zavala, amusement lighting her golden eyes, "It certainly motivated the Executor. He was watching you throughout our meetings, and was clearly working on something besides that plasteel contract, considering he didn't even try to block the infrastructure proposal."

"Eva." His intense stare is intimidating, but Eva will have none of it.

"You underestimate my concern for you, my friend." She smiles warmly at Zavala's look of tired exasperation. "What was I supposed to do, let you mope for the next few months? The poor girl wouldn't hold out that long. Besides, all I did was give him some information. I didn't force him to do anything. For all I know, he hasn't."

"That's very shrewd of you," Ikora says levelly. "That explains why Tess is afraid to buy you out."

Eva shrugs. From the Warlock, she suspects that's a compliment. "Thank you."

Turning back to Zavala, Ikora tilts her head to the side. "I can't imagine this not going in your favor. Even if I don't think it's the best of ideas."

"I think you might be surprised, Ikora," Eva chimes.

"The Speaker certainly isn't against it," She supposes aloud. "And you are miserable, so there's no doubt you're attached." She gives him a smirk that seems like more of a sad smile, the longer it stays on her face. "And above all, you are my teammate. My friend," She revises. The emotion seems to make her uncomfortable, Eva thinks. "I'll talk to Hideo myself, if need be."

"I can't imagine that ending well," Zavala deadpans. Ikora's lips curl into a predatory smile. The severity of Zavala's gaze lessens. "But I do appreciate the sentiment."

A man comes to see her. He is wearing a color red just a little bit darker than her blanket, she can see it out of the corner of her eye. He didn't look like a doctor, but Amanda doen't trust anyone these days. The last time she answered questions for a doctor he'd told these people to come get her.

"You're Amanda, yes?" He pauses. "Amanda Holliday?"

She blinks to him listlessly and then turns her head back to the window.

The man sighs. She hears the sound of footsteps, the annoyed huff of the new matron, her sworn enemy. "She's been like this since we brought her in. The only thing we've gotten out of her is that she wants to go back to her old orphanage."

He tilts his head toward the matron, asking quietly, "The one just outside the Rich District, right?"

"Yes," The matron answers, not that Amanda would have spoke to him anyway.

Silently, she pulls her blanket up and around her like armor, still refusing to make eye contact.

The man steps a little closer. He can see the bulge of her stump, the small, swollen limb wrapped beneath the blanket. "Did he make that for you?"

Her fingers curl through the stitches, wary, but she tips her head, listening.

"For the Dawning last year, he gave me a scarf that’s nearly the same color. It's warm and cozy, much like that blanket."

She looks at him, then. Her eyes are dull, it's clear she thinks this is some game, because she all but looks right through him before looking back toward the window.

"I've known Commander Zavala for a long time," He continues. "We work together on many things. I heard from another friend of ours that he is very worried about you."

That certainly draws a reaction. She gasps as though she's come up for air, her seaglass eyes glossy with unshed tears, but focused. "H-" She clears her throat. "He is?"

"What? Executor-"

The child's stare narrows angrily on the matron for her intrusion. He can feel the force of her tiny wrath.

"Leave us," He says to the matron, who sputters but complies.

The man pulls up a chair to her bedside. She scooches back, clearly unsure of the newcomer, regardless of who he claims to know, pulling her blanket up to her chin. "Can he come visit me? I-if he'd wanna?" She looks at him in concern, balling her fists to keep them from shaking.

"Did he come visit you often, before?" The man's eyes are not unkind. It's clear, if nothing else, he feels sympathy for her.

"He sat with me at night,' She murmurs, sniffling.

"I see." The man crosses his right leg over his left, slouching comfortably. "I don't think he knew you were moved," He tells her. It's a safer line of explanation than the truth, considering what the matron had told him when he arrived about her meltdown. "I'm going to see him shortly, and I'll make sure he knows he can come to see you any time he wishes."

She doesn't answer him, hugging the blanket to her tightly. Her closed off posture and behavior are not going to wavier, he can tell. Thus, he does not linger, rising without another word.

When he gets to the doorway, she drawls after him, "Ya promise?"

Hideo turns back. "Absolutely."

#destiny fanfic #shipwright september #commander zavala #amanda holliday #eva levante #executor hideo #new monarchy

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starryviolentine · 5 years

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Brody’s Diary (Revised Edition): Chapter 3

Part one of the “Pre-Apocalypse Adventures” Series

Chapter 1 ( here ) Chapter 2 ( here )

With three years of experience at Ericson Academy—or, as it’s more infamously known by local West Virginians as well as its own faculty and students, Ericson’s Boarding School for “Troubled Youth”—under her belt, it comes as no surprise that Therissa has witnessed her fair share of crappy situations. But nothing, nothing that the teenager has encountered in all that time even comes close to this. Her youngest roommate, Violet, is an absolute mess.

“In the lounge… after class… she just started yelling at me… for no reason…!”

Therissa has never seen anything more pitiful in her life.

Speech riddled with shaky, whimpery breaths, Violet struggles to tell Therissa what happened between her and Brody. It probably would have been a lot easier on them both if she had waited until she was calmer before starting to talk, but after bottling up her hurt and frustration all afternoon, Violet can no longer hold back. The words keep tumbling from her lips.

“Sh-she said… that I took her diary… but I didn’t…! I’ve never even touched it… I wouldn’t! And I tried… I tried to tell her but she didn’t listen… She kept saying… I took it… She wouldn’t listen! But I didn’t…! I didn’t take it!”

Violet lets her head drop into her hands as one last sob forces its way out of her throat. The main part of her story is finished. She can only hope that it was intelligible enough for Therissa to understand. Violet hastily wipes at her eyes with her sleeves, pointlessly, because her tears haven’t quite stopped.

She didn’t want to cry.

So much for that. Violet’s upset with herself for being so weak, not to mention downright embarrassed that she let her roommate see her like this. There’s no way she’s making eye contact with Therissa again.

But Therissa is patient. She doesn’t say anything, nor does she make a fuss over Violet’s tears, which is exactly what the younger girl needs. Before long, Violet starts to feel a little better. Her shoulders feel lighter, like when she finally takes off her backpack on those unlucky days when she has homework in every subject and has to take all of her books home. Finally, finally, Violet’s tears subside and the girl drags her palms down her cheeks to rid them of the offending wet streaks trailing down to her chin.

“And then—”

Voice thick and nasally, Violet attempts to continue but stops abruptly. Her congested nose has started to run and she pauses to sniffle hard. She doesn’t have anything to blow her nose with. Out of options, Violet decides to use one of her sleeves, not wanting to gross Therissa out with what seems like endless snot now dripping out of her nose. Unfortunately, one swipe of her sleeve isn’t enough to do the trick. In fact, it actually ends up making things worse by sort of smearing everything around. Violet panics and, mortified, slaps her hands over her face to cover the mess, shooting Therissa an S.O.S. with her eyes.

To her relief, Therissa gets the message and climbs down to steal Brody’s box of tissues from the nearby desk and brings it up to her. Violet takes a much needed moment to clean herself up. When she’s finished, she sighs softly, feeling a hell of a lot better. The embarrassment is still there, though. Violet thanks the heavens that at least Brody didn’t come walking in while she was crying.

The eleven-year-old gathers all of her used tissues and bunches them up in a fist. She keeps her eyes down as she resumes her story. “She said that she never wants to talk to me again…”

Therissa shakes her head and finally says something. “You two are, like, BFFs. There’s no freaking way.”

Violet absentmindedly fingers the edge of her blanket. She doesn’t look convinced.

Sighing, Therissa raises an arm and smooths out Violet’s hair, which got pretty ruffled and messy while she was burrowing into her blankets earlier. “Don’t let that get you down, okay?”

Violet nods slightly, still unable to believe how nice her roommate is being. It almost makes her wonder if she’s dreaming. She will never admit it out loud, but the way Therissa is fixing her hair and patting her on the head actually feels really nice. It makes Violet feel warm inside. “I’ve never seen her like that before. I mean, like, I’ve seen her mad, like that time Marlon put a caterpillar in her hair, but not like this.”

“Well, can you blame her?” Therissa asks. “Think about it. Diaries are always full of personal crap that nobody else is supposed to see. If something like that suddenly went missing, maybe even stolen on purpose, of course she’d react like that. She’s probably freaked out that it’s gonna end up in the wrong hands.”

“I hope Trey and Mitch don’t find it,” Violet says, frowning. “They would tease her for the next century. They’re still being jerks to Maddie about the whole swimming pool incident.”

“What I wanna know,” says Therissa, crossing her arms, “is why Brody thinks you took it. That part makes no sense.” The teen doesn’t notice Violet wilt slightly. “You know, considering you two are practically joined at the hip.”

The younger girl swallows, stomach starting to hurt as she comes to the realization that this is partly her fault after all. “Well... I kinda told her that diaries are dumb.”

Therissa snorts and shakes her head. “Oh, shit. I don’t mean to laugh, but… seriously, Violet? You can’t say that to Brody of all people. She treats that thing like one of her organs.”

At her roommate’s reaction, Violet shrinks even further. If Therissa of all people disapproves, what she did must be pretty bad. Violet didn’t think it was possible for her to feel any worse than she already did, but apparently she was wrong. Very, very wrong.

When Violet first arrived at Ericson’s, she and her mother were greeted by a sickeningly cheerful woman at the front gates who brought them into a big, red brick building to meet the headmaster. The meeting was long and boring, and, in Violet’s opinion, the headmaster asked way too many questions. For the last few minutes, she was asked to wait outside of his office while he and her mother talked alone. Violet couldn’t have left the room any faster. She knew they were going to be talking about her. About what was wrong with her. And she sure as hell didn’t want to be around to hear it.

Eventually her mother left without so much as a hug or a kiss goodbye, and Violet was shuffled off to the dormitory by another faculty member who dropped her off at her room, handed her a key, and instructed her to go inside and get settled in before dinner. Violet reluctantly did as she was told, not having much of a choice. But before she even reached for the knob, the door flew open. That was when she first met Brody.

Violet’s room key clatters to the floor as she is practically pounced on by a girl in pigtails wearing a greenish-blue striped shirt. She immediately becomes uncomfortable and takes a step back, making brief eye contact with the handsy stranger only so she can glare at her and hopefully ward off any further attempts at socialization. But the girl is unaffected and, instead, beams at Violet brightly.

“Hi, I’m Brody! We’re gonna be roommates!” The girl, Brody, is unable to control her excitement. She has been looking forward to Violet’s arrival the entire morning, ever since she and Therissa were suddenly called to the administrative office only to be told that they would be getting a new roommate that afternoon. “What’s your name?”

Violet doesn’t answer. If Brody thinks that she’s in any mood to talk right now, she’s sadly mistaken. She just wants to be left alone. Violet crosses the wooden floors, dragging her duffel bag behind her and tossing her backpack up into the top bunk of the unoccupied bed.

The name tag attached to her new roommate’s luggage catches Brody’s eye, and she tilts her head at an odd angle to try and read it. “Vi… Violet? Your name’s Violet? That’s a pretty name.”

During their first encounter, Brody rambled on and on about things that Violet didn’t want to hear at the time, like facts about the school and how she wanted to give her a tour of the campus. The chatty girl also asked a bunch of questions that Violet didn’t bother answering. When it came time to head to the dining hall for dinner, Brody tried her best to convince Violet to join her, but the stubborn girl refused. Instead, she climbed into her bunk and didn’t come down for the rest of the night.

“This is for you.”

On Violet’s fourth day at Ericson’s, Brody comes up to her new roomie holding a purple notebook and a matching pen. The pen, which hardly resembles a writing utensil at all, has fluffy purple feathers and a big, yellow smiley face attached to the top. It’s the most ridiculous thing Violet has ever seen. The blonde turns on her heels and starts to walk away, hoping Brody will take the hint and let her be. But Brody, determined, catches up to her quickly. She steps in front of Violet, blocking her path, and offers the gifts again.

“It’s a journal. You can write whatever you want in it,” Brody explains. “I was thinking that it might help you. I have one, too.” She gestures with her thumb to her bed. Violet’s eyes follow Brody’s finger and she spots a blue diary laying right on top of the girl’s pillow. “I write in it whenever I’m mad or sad, or when I’m scared. It always makes me feel better.”

Violet just stares at her, brows furrowed, and it soon becomes obvious that she has no intention of taking the notebook or pen. Brody tries one more time, looking directly into Violet’s eyes as if searching for even the tiniest reaction. “Dr. Larson says that it’s a good way to express yourself.” Nothing. “Well, I’m just gonna leave these on your desk, okay?”

Thinking back on her first days at the school, Violet wishes that she had been a little nicer to Brody. The girl was only trying to make her feel welcome, after all. Now that they’re friends, Violet can’t even imagine treating Brody that way on purpose. Guilt weighs heavily on her heart as she remembers the exact day she said those unkind words about Brody’s diary.

It has been a few months since Violet was dumped at Ericson’s, and the eleven-year-old has finally grown pretty used to her new life. On one sunny Saturday afternoon, she and Brody are sitting under one of the shady trees in the courtyard. While waiting for her friend to finish writing yet another one of her diary entries, Violet chomps on an apple and uses her free hand to play around in the dirt with a stick that she found.

Violet waits for what seems like an eternity. She’s now down to the last of her apple, gnawing on the core to make sure she gets every last edible bit, every now and then glancing back at Brody to check if her friend is ready to go yet. They’re supposed to be at the gym right now. Brody promised that she would shoot a few hoops with her before free time ends.

Popping the rest of the apple, core and all, into her mouth, Violet chews impatiently and wipes her sticky fingers onto her jeans. She spits the seeds into the grass and turns to her friend again. “Are you done yet?”

“Hold on,” Brody replies without looking up. “I just have to finish this part.”

“You said that already,” Violet says, slightly annoyed, “like an hour ago.”

Brody looks at her watch. “We’ve only been out here for twenty minutes. I’ll play ‘Pony’ with you right after this.”

“Brody, it’s called ‘Horse.’”

But Brody has already resumed writing. Violet’s bored out of her mind. She leans back against the tree trunk and sighs loudly. She really wants to play some basketball before the bigger kids come and hog the courts like they always do around this time of day. Maybe it’s already too late.

“Why do you always have to write in that thing anyway?” Violet wonders aloud. “Diaries are so dumb.”

Brody’s pen freezes and hovers over the half-filled journal page. “That’s mean, Vi.”

“Yeah, well, I wouldn’t wanna waste all my time talking to a book, that’s all.”

Ignoring Violet’s comment, Brody nudges her bag of raisins towards her friend. “I’ll give you these if you’ll wait just five more minutes. Then we’ll go, okay?”

Violet huffs but then curiously peers over at Brody’s snack. Raisins aren’t her favorite, but she’s still a little hungry. She takes the bribe. “Fiiine. But if you’re still not done after that, I’m leaving without you.”

“I shouldn’t have said that…” Violet starts to get upset again. “I didn’t mean it, I was just—”

“Hey,” Therissa cuts in. She snaps her fingers in front of Violet’s face, startling her into looking up. “Stop. Give her the night to cool off and then just explain again that you didn’t take the diary. Hell, you could even offer to help her look for it if you wanna make sure you get back on her good side.”

Therissa brings her gaze up to the ceiling and holds it there. When Violet glances over at her, she’s surprised to see that her roommate almost looks… sad? No, not exactly. Violet can’t pinpoint the teen’s emotion, but the atmosphere in the room changes and it’s making her a little nervous.

“Violet?”

“Yeah…?”

“I get it. I know what it’s like to say things you don’t really mean. I do it too,” Therissa confesses. She doesn’t have to look to know that Violet is staring at her in shock. This is the first time she has expressed any sort of remorse for her actions, not to mention the first time she’s ever opened up to Violet about something personal. “But we have to remember that sometimes it comes back to bite us in the ass.”

“Yeah,” says Violet softly, “I know.”

Therissa thumps her youngest roommate on the back and gives her a tiny smile. “Don’t worry, when Brody finally finds that thing she’s gonna feel really stupid for blaming you.” And with that, the teenager climbs down from Violet’s bunk, leaving the blonde to her own thoughts.

Deciding to take Therissa’s advice, Violet resolves to wait until tomorrow before trying to talk to Brody again. Better yet, she hopes that her friend’s diary turns up before then so she can prove that she’s been innocent all along. More than anything, though, Violet just wants everything to go back to normal. Because fighting with Brody totally blows.

#twdg violet #twdg brody #twdg therissa #twdg #the walking dead game #fanfic #my art #brody twdg #violet twdg #brody's diary

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goldenkamuyhunting · 5 years

Text

Ramblings and crazy theory time about GK chap 191 “Water Of Home”

New (painful) chapter so new analysis.

A premise. I began writing this as soon as the raw were out but this chapter was pretty painful for me and this sort of influenced my first judgement so I went back and forth revising this a lot when I calmed down… so I hope it’ll make sense. Sorry if it doesn’t.

The cover shows Shiraishi burying Kiro under the ice, the others just watching him doing so. Well, maybe Asirpa is helping, I’m not sure.

Actually I don’t really see her doing something, she seems to just stand there. I really, really wish she would do something as Asirpa has always been a caring person and I know she cared about Kiro.

However, now that I finally calmed down for Kiro’s death, I get she had a terrible day and might be not up for much and she also might be copying with a light form of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (she just learnt the people she trusted actually used her to shoot her father and Sugimoto, ended up almost killing someone and saw a person she used to love die… not an easy amount of things to put up with in insight) so, as sad as it is for Kiro, she’s probably being not her usual self and with good reasons.

Still… apart Shiraishi (and Asirpa who, as said before, is not up to much), no one among the people there is really caring about Kiro.

For Koito and Tsukishima he was just an enemy they just met and fought and who injured them seriously enough, especially Tsukishima. They didn’t care about him, they’re in no real shape to help burying him and anyway probably, for them, allowing him to be buried is the most I can expect.

But really…

I know Sugimoto wanted to kill Kiro for betraying him even if Kiro helped him through all the travel, even in Abashiri, when he helped him escape Nopperabo’s jail. I know Sugimoto doesn’t know Kiro didn’t want him shoot, just Wilk, and that he resents him for bringing Asirpa away… but really, the guy is dead and it’s not like he dragged away a kicking and screaming Asirpa or he mistreated her along the way.

I wish I could excuse Sugimoto by saying he was carrying Ogata and couldn’t have put him down on the cold ground or Ogata’s conditions might have worsened, because I understand prioritizing the living ones over the dead ones, but in this chapter itself we will be shown Sugimoto doesn’t care AT ALL about this.

So evidently he’s just still thinking Kiro needed to be murdered. I hope it’s at least his copying mechanism speaking up (in order to cope with killing and death Sugimoto tells himself his enemies aren’t human and don’t suffer when in pain) so that he can tell himself he doesn’t feel pain but still… it’s ugly.

The same goes for Tanigaki. Okay, so he was angry at Kiro for Inkarmat, but Kiro is also the one who saved his life and Inkarmat and the stabbing WAS AN INCIDENT, Kiro didn’t mean to stab her and would have wanted to help her and really, Shiraishi is the weakest in the group so Tanigaki you could help him.

Honestly boys, I’m disappointed.

You’re showing lack of respect for a fallen person, clinging to your petty grudges and conveniently forgetting the good this man did to you both.

Wanna see him as an enemy?

Fine but at least honour a fallen enemy who fought so hard he was impressive, not just stand there doing nothing.

Actually boys, you’re also leaving Shiraishi alone to mourn. Sugimoto, Shiraishi is your friend. If not for Kiro, you could show some sympathy for Shiraishi instead than leaving him alone to do all the work.

Shiraishi, who in this moment wins the prize as the sweetest guy ever, thinks that since the ice drift there is formed with water from the Amur river (the place from were Kiro came), when spring will come, Kiro will sink in the water that comes from his ‘home’ and be able to rest peacefully. I love how he thought about this, it shows he cared for this man. Shiraishi, who at the beginning of the story didn’t know how to care about people and would use the other convicts to escape and then leave them behind, had grown to form deep bonds with the people in the story and had grown to care for them.

We can see Shiraishi is clearly in pain… and he’s also the one who removes his glove and closes Kiro’s eyes, so as to let Kiro rest in peace. It’s a caring gesture.

A side of me is sad it’s not Asirpa doing it… but well, as said before she’s probably not in a great emotional shape. Even if she’s not physically hurt… she probably need to recover form the psychological wounds and maybe she’s just trying hard to distance herself from all this.

Sugimoto’s gaze is… just hard. He’s not even looking at Kiro but up.

Tanigaki, Tsukishima and Koito are clearly not going to cry for Kiro.

Yeah, to the four of them he was just an enemy they wanted to kill. I’m sad.

Yes, the piece is sad, it brought me to tears, Shiraishi’s words and acts are beautiful… but the sadness is all on Shiraishi’s shoulders and on the reader’s ability to either feel sorry for Kiro or at least to emphasize with Shiraishi who just lost a friend.

Actually the others just standing there, watching as if they were a curious bunch, I don’t know… at this point they could have left and let Shiraishi mourn on this own.

It’s a cruel moment.

Kiro gave his all and ultimately died for his cause and now, apart for Shiraishi and maybe Asirpa, he’s just circled by people who didn’t care for him at all. The unfairness of it is cruel, but I think this is the message. Kiro’s fight was, fundamentally, a lonely fight.

I don’t know, I’m just sad for him and angry, angry because I like the boys too and I was hoping they would behave better instead they’re just a big disappointment.

So really I didn’t expect Koito and Tsukishima to care, Kiro is a stranger to them and an enemy and I’m fine with this but… I expected a little more than just this from Tanigaki and Sugimoto. No, not tears and sobbing but… at least they could have helped burying Kiro. Or look a little sad. The man is dead. They had good moments with him. He wasn’t purely evil. Aren’t they sad things went out the wrong way? Besides Shiraishi IS mourning. They could… have showed a little empathy to him at least.

To be honest though… Shiraishi’s last words show how, although he cared for Kiro, he didn’t quite understand Kiro’s cause.

He thinks he was a man too serious for his own good. Shiraishi is in pain, he loved Kiro and wanted him to live and be his friend. He can’t understand why instead Kiro devoted all of himself to his own cause, did all he did for it and ultimately died. In Shiraishi’s case it’s not just racism speaking up, Shiraishi has just learnt to devote himself to his friends. He can’t understand Kiro devoting himself to a great cause like the minorities, giving his life for people he doesn’t even know.

I wonder if Shiraishi’s evolution is going to involve him growing to the point he’ll understand devoting for the others, not just his close friends but people in general. I wonder if, in a way, Kiro’s sacrifice will allow him to grow to become a person like Kiro, one who would care about people in need regardless of him knowing them.

And now… Asirpa.

Asirpa seems very sad for Kiroranke’s death, her nose is red and her mouth is close in a grimace.

She’s not quite crying though... although if I look at the image up close it seems her eyes are slightly wet. But maybe it's just me. Her main worry though is all for ‘why did my father have to die?’

When raw went out the thing left me a bit upside down.

I mean, discovering if her father had killed the Ainu had been her drama from the moment they had met Kiro and he told her about how her father was Nopperabo so it’s not a minor deal and we knew it from… well, really long ago and Kiro was someone she trusted and respected so it should have hurt a lot to discover he used her to get a chance to murder her father and, fundamentally, tricked her into coming with him. I understand she’s probably wondering if all Kiro said to her about her father were only lies, if Kiro was a man who didn’t deserve her respect at all.

Still, even Inkarmat told her about how her father was a partisan and the Russians had ‘wanted man’ posters with his face. A partisan at the time killed for his cause and he clearly killed the Russian emperor at least. Wilk murdered people, there’s no turning around this.

If her problem is ‘if her father had killed people or not’ yes, he did.

Is the problem ‘if he murdered THOSE AINU or not’?

(Note that I’m saying ‘those Ainu’ because Wilk might have murdered Ainu during his partisan fight, be it because, like his companion, they turned in a disability or betrayed him or were just casualties on the way so, unless Asirpa is in denial over the whole thing, Wilk might have murdered Ainu regardless of Wilk murdering ‘those Ainu’ or not.)

Anyway, from how Kiro acted there’s no turning around the fact Kiro believed Wilk was guilty of betraying their cause. Kiro was likely misguided, all right, he likely assumed Wilk to be guilty when the culprit was apparently someone else but… he was in good faith.

So it’s not like he could tell Asirpa her father was innocent… and Asirpa seems not to be even sure HE was the one behind Wilk’s death so…

But now (also thanks to a talk with @chibivesicle and the other guys at discord)… I think she is just upside down. She’s clinging to what motivated her to go through all that travel, discovering the truth about her father, so that she won’t have to look at what happened along the way. In short she’s trying to distance herself and, at the same time, to find a reason why she had to go through all this.

I think in a way she will soon discover the price for the truth is getting way too high that she had anticipated.

While focusing on the goal can help you to go on, if you lose sight of what happens along the way, of what gets sacrificed along the way, you lose sight of yourself.

In a way it’s like Nikaido’s quest for revenge, in which he loses a body part each time. Or Ogata’s quest for the gold, in which at a certain point the gold seemed to pointless he only wanted Asirpa to murder him. Or Sugimoto’s quest for the gold, in which for each person he murders he loses a bit of himself. Or Kiro’s quest too, who lead him to murder Wilk (who was probably innocent), leave behind his family (whom he loved) and to lie to Asirpa (whom he cared about).

A goal gives you the strength to go on, but you can’t lose sight of what’s going on around yourself or you’ll lose more than you are bargaining for. Honestly I’m worried for Asirpa.

Anyway here there’s a part I wish was handled differently.

As Asirpa expresses her wish to know the truth… the boys just tell her what they had learnt about her father but… it’s not a real talk about her father it’s just them telling her an one sentence info.

I mean, if this is Asirpa’s drama, the thing that’s tormenting her the most (and Sugimoto knows it is) I wish they had handled it with care.

They could have sat her down, explained it to her gently and in details.

Instead Tanigaki merely tells her how Inkarmat was told by Kiro about how Wilk changed...

...which obviously makes Asirpa think her father was killed because he killed the Ainu.

Thanks Tanigaki, you’re really being emotionally supportive in this one, of course you’re here because you cared for Asirpa…

I mean, this is clearly a rather painful thing for her to learn. I get you’re the sort that has no idea what tact is but… but all this seems to be a ‘get over it, Kiroranke said your father betrayed their comrades’.

Besides, really Tanigaki, considering how hung up you were on Ogata when he betrayed the 7th, you should have felt even more sympathy for Kiro and instead just because BY MISTAKE he stabbed Inkarmat you had to make him pay at any cost even if you knew Inkarmat was betraying you all by tattling things out to Tsurumi, using YOU as a mean. I get you love her and are angry she got hurt but really, the world doesn’t revolve around you.

I’m upset Tanigaki, I really, really though you’ll do better and instead you go back on making the same mistakes.

Anyway I’ve always found interesting how we don’t see Kiro’s face in that scene.

Sugimoto says instead that ‘Nopperabo’ told him he didn’t kill the Ainu.

Honestly I’m not so fond of how he calls Asirpa’s father ‘Nopperabo’… he knows he’s Asirpa’s father by now and the guy had a name, no sense in using a nick that was cruelly referring to how his face got destroyed… but what’s worse it is how he’s telling her this only now… and in such a way. He’s basically cutting the whole conversation to a ‘he said he didn’t kill the Ainu’. Wilk said other things, things that could make his sentence more believable and that his daughter might wish/need to know.

Instead, this is the end. He doesn’t even really encourages Asirpa to believe in what Wilk said, he just tells her this despite Asirpa looking rather down.

Unless the topic will be raised later, that’s all Asirpa will know from them.

And that’s why I facepalm.

Really Sugimoto, didn’t you say you had lot of things to tell Asirpa? That ‘lot of things’ feels rather small now… and why are you telling her this only now? Too caught up in your Kiro hunting? Wasn’t this the first thing to tell her?

‘Asirpa, breathe in relief, your father told me he’s not the one who killed the Ainu?’

Not ‘Asirpa you put up some weight’ or ‘let’s go hunt Kiroranke’, just tell her something that would reassure her fear, a fear you admitted terrorized her. Really, Sugimoto, I don’t know what you’re thinking but I’m angry. Show a little more consideration for Asirpa’s feelings.

Back to Asirpa, she seems sad and confused (and it's noteworthy how in all this discussion her face was ALWAYS slightly shadowed instead than in full light... a hint to how Asirpa is holding inside herself her dark thoughts?)...

...then it dawns on her that Sofia is missing even though she should be nearby.

I wonder if this too is Asirpa’s attempt to distance herself from the thing because… really… if Sofia were to know what had happened, would come there where she would be clearly outnumbered by the men who killed Kiro? She’s a clever leader, she wouldn’t do something so dumb.

Meanwhile Tsukishima, due to blood loss thanks to his wound which apparently never got treated as he was PRESSING HIS HAND AGAINST IT THE ENTIRE TIME, falls on one knee.

Koito goes ‘Tsukishimaa!! Are you all right?’ to which Tsukishima answers he is when he’s clearly not while Tanigaki checks his wound and realizes it’s an awful one.

Koito at this point would want to hurriedly go back to Akou and for Tanigaki to carry Tsukishima on his back.

I’m… angry at Koito honestly.

We’ll see his arm is bandaged, meaning someone took care of his wounds, be it Tsukishima or Tanigaki or Koito himself, but Koito knew Tsukishima was hurt and yet, although he cares for Tsukishima, he apparently didn’t give him basic medical aid back not even NOW when the situation calmed down. This is not lack of leadership abilities, this is not immaturity, this is dumb. He saw Tsukishima being hurt, he got so angry at Tsukishima being hurt, it’s not like he cares for Kiro so his death upset him so… WHY DIDN’T HE TAKE CARE OF TSUKISHIMA?

And mind you, I’m not just angry at Koito but also furious at Tanigaki. Tsukishima has all the right side of his neck covered in blood and was applying pressure to the wound with his hand so it’s clear he was hurt and Tanigaki… Tanigaki just stood there. Tanigaki had been in the war, he knows wounds better than Koito so while Koito might not realize how bad Tsukishima was hurt, Tanigaki should have gotten it… but he clearly cares about Tsukishima even less.

Oh, and obviously Sugimoto doesn’t give a damn about Tsukishima either, but okay, despite travelling together, they weren’t friends apparently.

(If someone is wondering why I’m not mentioning Shiraishi it’s because A – Shiraishi really doesn’t know Tsukishima and B – Shiraishi just lost a friend and is mourning so he’s the only one who actually had a good reason not to notice how badly Tsukishima was hurt.)

As for Asirpa… it’s interesting in the scene in which Koito says they need to hurry back to Akou we see Asirpa’s sweating face.

I think the idea is Asirpa doesn’t want to go back with those people.

She knows the code now, or at least has a hint to it, and she should have realized they’re men from the 7th, working for Tsurumi in hope to get the gold. I don’t think she wants to give them the code. I think in a ways she probably feels trapped and alone at the idea to go back.

Still… a side of me is worried, while Tsukishima is unable to stand, Asirpa, who previously was always noticeable for her caring soul, is now all worried for Sofia, who exchanged letters with Kiro so she might know everything and looks around searching for her. In short she’s distancing from the present situation, focusing again on the goal.

Honestly, I’m afraid for Asirpa. Copying methods are good only for a short time. If she let the worry about her deceased father being a murder or not ruling her life and ignoring all that’s happening around her… she might end up losing herself in the process.

Sure, we might think it’s great she’s not desperate… but actually traumas don’t go away just because you don’t look at them in the face. She lived a traumatic experience after another. The fact she looks good doesn’t necessarily mean she IS good.

Truly, I’m afraid for her. I’m afraid she’ll lose her caring soul in attempt to keep the pain at bay and will end up empty in the process. I’m afraid she’ll change for worse. Now that I’m calm I know she’s VERY LIKELY not meant to, but I’m afraid. Maybe I’m just paranoid.

And, on a sidenote, this annoys me further with the guys.

Whatever her father did, for whatever reason he died… that’s no responsibility of Asirpa whatsoever. She was 6/7 when the Ainu were killed. Clearly not an age in which she could realize what Wilk was up and, if needed, stop him.

The guys should realize this and TELL HER. Damn it boys, just tell her she shouldn’t feel accountable for whatever her father did. She can feel responsible just the same, because that would be the response of many people but, at least, she’ll feel reassured the world won’t think she’s to blame. But no, it’s much better to let Asirpa feel responsible. I’m annoyed and I want to smack them.

While Asirpa looks around, Sugimoto, using his binoculars, catches a glimpse of Svetlana and… Asirpa points to a direction, I don’t know if it’s the same, claiming there’s people over there and I praise her eyesight as I can’t see them in Noda’s drawing.

We won’t see Svetlana again so… really, why is she in this story?

I like to think Noda had a point to introduce her but so far I’m not seeing it.

Anyway, while Tanigaki is hopefully taking care of Tsukishima’s wound (I don’t know, really, bandaging it feels like it would be a good idea guys but who am I to speak?), Koito informs Asirpa (really Koito you should be confident about her name, you came all that way to search her, it wasn’t a holiday trip!), they came till there to secure her and how they’re in a deal with Sugimoto, who’s cooperating with them, them as in the 7th because remember? Sugimoto promised Tsurumi the code to Tsurumi in exchange for 200 yen as he’s totally in charge of the Ainu gold and can totally influence Asirpa to do what he says (yeah, I’m still angry for Sugimoto’s deal with Tsurumi too) so she shouldn’t leave the group without Koito’s permission.

Koito evidently feels he’s in charge since Tsukishima is out of commission.

On a sidenote not much time ago I pointed out to how Koito isn’t smooth at all. I don’t know if it’s due to the translation or not but I basically get the feeling he told her she’s almost their prisoner and he’s in charge of her and Sugimoto agreed to this as well. This isn’t going to make him win Asirpa’s trust.

Asirpa couldn’t care less about Koito’s words as she decides she’ll go check whatever she saw and Sugimoto decides he’ll go as well.

Now… maybe this could be educative for Koito as he might learn how annoying it was when he was the one leaving the group, and I get Asirpa might hope it’s Sofia and might be in a rush to check if it’s her as she wanted to see her, and she’s probably upset by how Koito talked with her and, well, she’s likely trying to distance herself from everything so Asirpa’s situation is complicate but… well, this is bad.

Koito told her something relevant actually, that Sugimoto made a deal with the 7th. Ironically, even if Sugimoto clearly doesn’t mean to betray Asirpa, he’s the one who sold Asirpa’s code to Tsurumi for 200 yen instead than for 30 pieces of silver.

I wonder if Asirpa will keep this in mind, if it’ll weight on her or… if she’ll let it slide because it’s Sugimoto.

On another side what I really hate of this is how they decided to make this an ‘humorous moment’.

The first part of why I don't like it is easy to explain. The scene makes very clear how Koito got zero respect from Asirpa (it's even written in a box if you had missed it!), which okay is true and remarks how he’s no leader but… had it been Tsukishima the one who spoke up, would they had cared and remained there?

I’m willing to bet they wouldn’t have so this basically destroy the point it’s just because it’s Koito telling them so.

Going on.

I said this could be an ‘educative moment’ for Koito and how Asirpa might have reasons for wanting to rush there but… overall she and Sugimoto seem two little kids rushing away. Yeah, them acting as such doesn’t excuse Koito when he acts as such (he has the rank and he’s in a military mission) and point out how they don’t feel bound to the 7th but still…

And here there’s something else I really hate of the whole scene.

In his rush to go check, Sugimoto drops Ogata and leaves him on the cold ground. The whole thing is clearly played for laugh, same as how they’re acting like little kids and not listening Koito but it’s actually bad for many reasons.

I’ll skip how I don’t like the joke of letting an injured person fall on the ground. Humour is also a matter of personal tastes and this is my problem alone and I’ll focus on plot related reasons.

First of all, as said before, if Sugimoto didn’t care about leaving Ogata on the ground, he could have just let him down before, to help Shiraishi bury Kiro. The fact he didn’t point out how he wanted no part in it. Evidently, even if he couldn’t kill Kiro, he was still pissed at Kiro even after the man died to the point he didn’t even consider helping Shiraishi burying him.

Second, we aren’t really in an ‘only gags’ story. They worried to cover Ogata up with hat and mittens, a hint cold would be bad for him, but now they’re okay with rudely dropping him on the cold ground and leaving him there until they’re back because it’s not like Koito, Tsukishima or Tanigaki or Shiraishi can carry him on their backs. They could have spared putting him hat and mittens at this point. We’ll see in a following image Ogata’s lips are in a bad shape same as when he got involved in the fight with Vasily. More cold won’t be healthy to him. Same goes for an abrupt fall.

Third. They decided to go hunt Kiro carrying Ogata along even though it was a bad choice because it was extremely unpractical and now realize they would do better leave him behind to go check what’s going on ‘there’? With three people who wouldn’t mind murdering him on the spot? Couldn’t they check with the binoculars and see if Sofia was there or not?

Forth. Honestly, Koito was right. Sugimoto, same as him, is sure he can face everyone but they shouldn’t have left the group. And what if Sofia was there? What’s the plan? Asirpa would ask Sofia to tell her the truth and Sofia would tattle out everything obediently AND GIVE UP ON THE GOLD? AND BE OKAY WITH HOW KIRO WAS KILLED? Or Sugimoto planned to force her to talk? Sofia? Honestly, I’m starting to think Asirpa decided not to leave Ogata behind solely because she wants to question him again.

Fifth. Tsukishima is hurt and in need of medical aid, Koito has realized it late but he has realized it and Ogata is hurt as well and in need of medical aid so that’s not a good moment to run away and cause the whole group to slow down.

Sixth… well, this is again personal so it’s okay if you feel different but I get this is an attempt to lighten the mood because we’ve had some serious chapters and maybe we need to have our mood lightened but… but Kiro died, Tsukishima is badly hurt and Ogata, who almost died, is now unconscious, and theoretically might not survive (I’m sure he’ll survive by the way but the group isn’t mean to know Ogata has plot armour at the moment). Maybe I’ve just a different sense of humour but I don’t need Sugimoto and Asirpa to play little kids in such a moment. Honestly, for me, it doesn’t work, it’s like the ‘golden shower’ of chap 188. It felt anticlimactic and reduced a lot the impact of the scene instead than lightening the mood. But well, others might enjoy this sort of things so this is mostly my problem.

Anyway, no, it’s not Sofia who they saw but Gansoku, busy enjoying being beaten by a pair of escape convicts because… more humour.

Gansoku is delighted he had found Sugimoto again and follows him… while Sugimoto is clearly not positively impressed by how Gansoku enjoyed when he’s beaten, which is again meant to be seen as fun.

In the end Gansoku ends up on carrying Tsukishima bridal style. Tsukishima doesn’t comment. I don’t know if it’s because he really doesn’t really seem in a good shape or because this too is supposed to be humorous. Tanigaki carries the backpacks.

Honestly, I hope this will have a point and won’t be only just an attempt to lighten the mood because really, I know Golden Kamuy isn’t written with me as the ideal reader in mind but… but I didn’t like this at all. -_-

Shiraishi, bless the man, saves the situation by saying farewell to Kiroranke. He seems still sad.

Sugimoto and Asirpa look back but say nothing.

Sugimoto, you... really, you... I hope you’re just copying. Asirpa, really, I’m worried about you. You’re keeping too many things bottled inside.

Anyway Sugimoto asks Asirpa if, once they’ve carried the others to Ankou they should go search for Sofia again and I wonder… are you plotting to betray Tsurumi already Sugimoto? Because I don’t think you’re meant to leave Tsukishima’s group with Asirpa and do as you prefer.

On a sidenote this is one of the few scenes in which we see Ogata’s face. Is it random or is it meant to mean something? I don’t know.

Is Ogata conscious? Hard to say.

Asirpa says it’s unnecessary as Sofia will find her.

Yeah, you can bet on this, she’ll come for Asirpa and Asirpa is a clever girl to realize it.

The sad part is I think it means Asirpa understood that Sofia needs her for the code. Everyone wants Asirpa for the code. In a way she should feel horribly alone and, I think, she doesn’t want to tell anyone she has remembered it. Or will she tattle it out to Sugimoto? We’ll see. At this point I don’t know what to think.

Before she had to rush see if it was her because… humour. Now she’s fine with waiting for Sofia to find her.

The scene switches and we see Sofia moving away the ice blocks from Kiro’s face. On top of Kiro’s ice burial we can see Kiro’s damaged knife (remember the Ainu’s tradition to damage the objects of the deceased?). I don’t know but watching again at Kiro’s dead face again, somehow break my heart all over again.

Maybe that’s because it’s Sofia who’s watching him, Sofia who cares about him and it’s painful to hear her giving him her farewell and telling him she won’t forget him. I think Kiro’s death hurt Sofia even more than Shiraishi.

Sofia slapped Kiro even though she knew Kiro too loved Wilk and did what he did because he believed it necessary and then… she let him go alone to search for Asirpa… and next she saw him, he was dead. I bet Sofia feels responsible and thinks if she had gone with him he might have been still alive. I wonder if she ever realized he loved her. I don’t know, I’ve so many feelings for this scene.

The background is soft, with all those bubbles of light it’s as if it was an almost magical/spiritual moment. As if Kiro’s soul was there to listen her.

It was painful to see Shiraishi bury Kiro with so much love despite everything, but seeing Sofia giving her goodbye to Kiro… it really breaks my heart.

Really, this is a beautiful scene, one that works and has a point instead of that ‘humorous one’ of moments ago.

The scene ends with the focus on Kiro’s knife, then we switch to Sugimoto who returns to Asirpa the knife she gave him when he went to talk with Nopperabo.

We actually don’t see what he gives her until later, when we’ll see an image of Asirpa standing with her knife latched to her side.

Anyway Asirpa seems touched and thanks him...

before she latches it again at her side while Sugimoto tells her they should go back to Hokkaido.

Asirpa’s image with her knife latched on her side covers most of the scene, behind her there’s Sugimoto, mostly covered by her but still visible. On his back but barely visible there’s Ogata. The positioning of the character is a little odd as Asirpa’s body is basically turned in the opposed direction of Sugimoto’s body and light is breaking down from the clouds and… I don’t know, it’s a little weird how this scene was drawn, putting emphasis on Asirpa’s standing figure with her knife on the side.

The scene switches and we move back to Hokkaido, at Noboribetsu hell valley hot spring.

We get some exposition about it but the only relevant part is that the 7th division go there to treat their wounds. So we see poor Nikaido sitting under a waterfall, looking as if he had apparently gotten better (the last we’ve seen of him he was desperate because Sugimoto had died and he had lost his hand and wanted to let himself die as he refused food).

Usami is with him and… he’s letting the water hit his groins. Is he doing it because he has some sort of masochistic tendencies or he got a groin wound? Or it’s just another attempt at humour?

Well, if it is, I don’t mind it. Mind you, it’s still not my kind of humour, but the situation is different and, along with the change of scene, I’m okay with Noda making jokes to lighten the situation.

They’re joined by the warrant officer Kikuta, who had a nasty scar on his chest, where his heart is… and also his forehead seems protruding a bit, although a little less than Ushiyama (and he’s also a... gifted man, sorry for cutting the lower part of the scene but I don’t want to fight with Tumblr censorship politics).

Long story short, this guy’s rank is above Tsukishima but below Koito so Usami goes all polite with him as he asks him how his wound is going. Usami has also his forehead shadowed and is sweating so I’ll assume he’s pretty nervous.

Kikuta asks Usami if they were sent there by Tsurumi who got worried about him. I think Kikuta might be ironic because Usami doesn’t reply hurries to go back to let water hit his groins (he had pulled himself up before).

That or there’s more we don’t know about, regarding this guy. While Usami seemed worried Nikaido seems to be comfortable around this guy.

Kikuta tells him how private first class Ariko told him a weird story regarding how he met a weird guy in an hot spring deeper in the mountains the pitch-black night before, one who was wearing geta and could escape even without using a lamp.

Of course our memory automatically goes back to Toni Anji, who was a blind bandit and therefore could do such things (even the text mentioning Tengu seems to be a call back to him), though I wonder if it could be actually another convict.

I mean, Toni didn’t really wear geta, they assumed he did but actually the sound was caused by him clicking his tongue. Did Ariko really saw the geta or only heard the sound and assumed those were geta?

We still miss 5 convicts so we need to meet another soon.

To have Toni Anji back, though would be good as well as it had been a while form the last time we saw him and it would be interesting if he were to be up on something, maybe hunting another convict since he wasn’t with Hijikata when the man went on hunting for Sekiya. I wonder if Kantarou is with him as well.

As for Kikuta… he’s apparently a member of the 7th and, I think, there could be more about him. Usami’s reaction to him was interesting, same as how Nikaido instead seems to be comfortable with him. And how did he got wounded?

Was he maybe among the men who tried to transfer the convicts? Was he wounded by Hijikata and left for death?

Or he got injured when they fought Tsuyama?

Or was he involved in the Abashiri attack?

Hard to say but I hope he and this first class Ariko whom he just mentioned will turn out into interesting characters.

Can they be more rebels maybe? That’s why Nikaido gets along well with him? Or there’s more?

Is he a close accomplice to Tsurumi, one who’s maybe into all the dirty jobs Tsurumi makes like killing Hanazawa?

Or does Tsurumi suspect him?

Well, for now we can only wait and see as the story shift from the ‘Russian invasion’ group to the 7th again.

Again sorry if this chap’s analysis did turn out poor. Really Kiro’s death is still weighting on me and somehow it didn’t help. Sorry about it.

Edit: In this chapter Kikuta and Ariko's names were spelled Kikuda and Arako. As I know know the correct spelling, I fixed it.

#Golden Kamuy #Kiroranke #Shiraishi Yoshitake #Asirpa #Sugimoto Saichi #Tanigaki Genjirou #Koito Otonoshin #Tsukishima Hajime #Nikaidou Kouhei #Svetlana #Gansoku Maiharu #Sofia #Golden Kamuy Ramblings and Theories #Ariko Rikimatsu #Usami Tokishige #Kikuta Mokutarou

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