#this pandemic has been hell but i'm getting better.

[sirfrogsworth]

The Pretty Average Trump Trauma

I really picked the wrong week to have a controversial post go viral.

The appeal deadline for my disability case is very soon and we just recently got the last of the medical records. My lawyer can get very busy and hard to reach. And I have been freaking out trying to get a hold of him to make sure everything is ready to be submitted. Thankfully he just emailed and said everything is on track and will be sent in for the appeal.

But having this weighing on me behind the scenes while also dealing with the blowback from my "vote for Biden" post caused me to enter into some unhealthy arguments and lose my temper on several occasions.

I didn't actually think about what would happen if that post went viral. Sometimes I write things and a hundred people see it, and it serves as a catharsis because I was able to get my thoughts and fears out of my brain.

And sometimes it gets reblogged 6000 times and I can forget I have a platform where that happens from time to time.

I wish I had written a better initial post. I think my thoughts in subsequent posts, along with the inclusion of what I think is a better strategy, would have gone a long way to help people understand my point of view. Looking back, that original post feels incomplete.

The post that ended up going viral was not inspired by reason or logic and it was never really meant to convince anyone of anything.

I thought I was preaching to the choir.

It was a representation of my fears. It was the result of two years of panic and trauma from the pandemic which ended in my mother's horrible death.

Let me explain...

On November 9th, Shaun, a YouTuber I respect, posted this.

And it scared the hell out of me.

A very popular leftist with a huge platform wrote this to 5 million people and I freaked out.

Shaun wasn't necessarily saying not to vote for Biden at the time. But he thinks people should all say they won't vote for him unless he calls for a ceasefire. I get the strategy. But I feared that nuance would be lost on many people and they would only see it as "don't vote for Biden... no matter what." Which was an accurate prediction on my part. The guy from Eve 6 has been going nuance-free for weeks now.

The one thing I greatly disagree with Shaun about is this...

Before the pandemic, I might have understood his argument. For the first two years, Trump was mostly an ineffectual goof. He had trouble getting a lot of his worst ideas to manifest. Most of the border wall he built ended up being repairs of existing barriers. And Obama droned civilians and kept kids in cages too—though Trump kept them in cages indefinitely and made up a rule that we can't actually know how many civilians he was droning.

So, a lot of the same, but turned up to 11.

But nothing about the pandemic response was pretty average.

There is something I have been choosing not to say during all of these discussions. I felt like saying it would be poor timing. I was worried people wouldn't actually agree with me. I worried it would make people think I was turning suffering into a competition. I didn't want to make it look like I valued certain lives over others. But then people accused me of all of that anyway. I was called evil and a collaborator and a supporter of genocide.

So I'm going to talk about it. Because the fact that few have mentioned it in these discussions has been bothering me. And the fact that the majority of society does not mention it makes me feel very alone in this belief.

I have long believed Trump and the majority of US conservatives committed a genocide of the disabled and elderly. I was never really comfortable calling it that word. I wasn't really sure how a genocide got classified as such. So I would just say things like, "40% of people who died during COVID should still be alive" and "Trump is responsible for hundreds of thousands of COVID deaths" and "Trump killed my mom" and hoping people would make the connection or at least see it as mass murder. I mean, this country judges everything by how many "9/11s" something is, but not the pandemic?

Donald Trump was the leader of the Republican party. When he refused to wear a mask due to vanity, his followers looked for something to excuse him. And I feel that directly birthed the "masks don't work" movement among conservatives. Donald Trump, having enormous influence among his acolytes, refused to correct this dangerous rhetoric. And he probably welcomed the cover so he could continue going maskless and not smear his makeup—even after he nearly died.

It is my belief this was the beginning of a genocide of apathy, deliberate and accidental incompetence, and non-compliance. And the reason for that non-compliance was not freedom as many claimed.

Conservatives did not like being inconvenienced.

They didn't like having to consider others.

And if competence requires effort and vigilance, they'd prefer doing the bare minimum.

Trump was famous for not filling vital administrative positions in the executive branch. Not only that, his turnover rate was 5 times higher than previous administrations. People were asked to do the job of several people because they didn't staff properly, and so those people quit. Thus creating a cycle of inexperienced new-hires that were out of their depth and asked to do much more than they bargained for. There is no way they could succeed in their jobs.

I think people forget that part of the role of the executive is the day-to-day boring administrative shit that is required to run a country. And when this day-to-day work isn't valued, it creates a crisis of incompetence. Which then creates things like not enough tests, not enough testing, Trump saying "if you don't test, it doesn't count", botched vaccine rollouts, rampant misinformation, poor education of the populace, and abysmal improvised press conferences where the President does a quick riff on injecting bleach.

This competence aspect is one of the hugest reliefs I had with the Biden administration. Not Biden. Not his policies. I'm talking about the regular workers getting shit done. This is the reason I am desperate to get my shit worked out with Social Security before the election. I once called Social Security during the pandemic and I literally got a recording saying to try calling back the next month.

Trump didn't care. People criticized him for not hiring people. He was aware of the problem. He just did nothing about it. And many conservatives praised him for "trimming the fat" or whatever. This idea that all of these government workers were useless burdens on the taxpayer fell apart during the pandemic.

There is incompetence caused by ignorance but it can also be a deliberate act. Trump was extraordinary in all forms of incompetence. He wasn't qualified to manage a pandemic. But he could have easily appointed experts and then gotten out of the way. But his narcissism would not let him cede power to anyone. He has always been convinced "only Trump can save you" and so his ego helped kill nearly half a million people.

Once the incompetence ball got rolling, that's when malicious apathy reared its ugly head. It was time to choose who they cared least about dying—who they felt was most useless. Conservatives decided it was time to devalue lives and start making sacrifices to save politicians' money laundering fronts small businesses.

Popular conservatives were going on TV and saying it was okay if Grandma died. It would be a worthy sacrifice to protect our freedoms.

The Lt. Governor of Texas, Dan Patrick, basically offered up the elderly for sacrifice all while claiming that he spoke for them and was also willing to die. Though I don't take his personal willingness very seriously, since he has the money and resources to get the best medical care and probably had no expectation he was in any danger.

“No one reached out to me and said, ‘As a senior citizen, are you willing to take a chance on your survival in exchange for keeping the America that all America loves for your children and grandchildren?’ But if they had? If that is the exchange, I’m all in. So my message is let’s get back to work. Those of us who are 70-plus, we’ll take care of ourselves.”

But you cannot just sacrifice the elderly. You may justify it by saying they have lived a long life, but many of the same health risks were shared by the disabled. Many of whom still had normal lifespans, but just needed extra care and protection.

There are countless elderly who cannot "take care of themselves" but they are still of value to our society. They are still loved. They watch and teach their grandchildren. They are the keepers of the family stories. They bake cookies and give you two dollar bills. They have random bowls of butterscotch all throughout their house.

But some need help. Some are sick. Some can't drive. Some can't walk. I guarantee not all of them were prepared to die for the cause.

And none deserved to die for a sports bar.

Oh, didn't I mention?

Dan Patrick owned a chain of sports bars that were losing money from the lockdowns. Did you really think he was sacrificing old folks "for the children"?

Thankfully Dan's sports bars are gonna be okay. He ended up receiving a $179,000 PPP loan... that was forgiven.

Then they started saying COVID deaths weren't COVID deaths.

"Well, they had a bad heart." "They were obese." "They had cancer."

They dropped the elderly excuse and began to openly devalue the disabled as well. If you were sick, what good were you? They considered us the next sacrifices for their convenience. If we wanted to survive, we shouldn't have gotten sick. It didn't matter that we could survive for years or even have a normal lifespan as long as we were protected by our communities.

And then began the non-compliance.

Trump's followers ignored masks and lockdowns and eventually vaccines. They were unwilling to protect the vulnerable and so many of us just... died.

Again, 40% of the US COVID deaths could have been prevented. Hundreds of thousands of people should still be here. Malicious apathy, incompetence, and non-compliance were the direct cause of this genocide.

The United Nations Genocide Convention identified 5 acts that typically constitute genocide. Only one act is required and in the pandemic 3 of the 5 acts happened.

Killing members of a group. Causing members of a group serious bodily harm. Imposing living conditions on that group that would destroy them.

I'm looking at that third one just now and realizing why we have advocates to remind us of vulnerable groups that need protection. I was thinking about how the elderly and disabled were trapped in hyper-contagious nursing homes and care facilities, but I completely forgot about prisons and the concentration camps at the borders.

I am not trying to diminish the awful things happening in Palestine right now. This is not a comparison of suffering—but a reminder. When a current terrible thing is happening, it can be hard to focus on anything else. But I do wish more people recognized what happened as a genocide and that the leader of that genocide, the one with the power to stop it, was Donald Trump. If we are going to base this voting decision entirely on acts of genocide, why is this not part of the consideration?

It is an awful moral calculus we have to figure out. One president is supporting and asking for funding for a genocide and I feel the other was the direct cause of another genocide. That's why I said both choices sucked. And the only way I could resolve this moral calculation was by asking what path would cause the least harm for everyone involved.

And the most disappointing aspect of all of these debates was the ableism. People told me if Trump was elected and I lost my benefits I should grow my own food and learn about medicine. They said I valued disabled lives above those in Gaza. They told me to imagine myself in Nazi Germany as a collaborator despite the fact I would have been euthanized.

But I felt like they weren't considering the disabled at all.

I am a disability advocate. So of course I am going to remind people to consider us in their voting decisions. But I'm tired of hearing I value lives differently just because I speak on behalf of a vulnerable group more often. I'm tired of continually having to justify my existence. And I'm tired of people dismissing the very real trauma caused by Trump.

It was not pretty average.

I'd like to tell you the full story of my mother's passing. All of the details. Even the ones I can't bear to type. But this isn't just my story. This is the story of countless others who had to watch their loved ones slowly die behind glass or over the phone or on an iPad.

I spent two years in constant anxiety trying to protect my two very sick parents. It was always assumed that my father was the most at risk. And that he was probably going to die long before my mother. But she had started a treatment for her psoriatic arthritis that turned the volume down on her immune system. Something that would normally not be a huge risk... but a pandemic changed that. A vaccine needs a functioning immune system to protect someone.

She could either accept the agony of stopping treatment or risk getting COVID. If people would have been willing to protect her, it would have been an easier choice. And she would still be around today. And I wouldn't have to worry about being homeless right now.

I don't know for sure when she was infected. I kept her inside as much as possible. But she needed those treatments and we had to pile into a crowded waiting room every time. And I remember a man in his fifties who seemed preoccupied with having to wear a mask. And when he thought no one was looking, he'd pull it down below his nose. A few days later she was being taken away in an ambulance.

A few weeks before my mother died, she called me on the phone. She was heavily medicated and they had two different breathing devices assisting her. The nurse was holding the phone up to her ear and she was trying to speak over the volume of the air rushing into her face from the masks. I could not hear her no matter how loud she yelled. So she asked the nurse to take the masks off for just a second so we could talk.

Her only concern was for my father. We all contracted COVID and she was so worried he would end up just like her. Thankfully the vaccine worked for him and he was okay at that moment. But she kept yelling, "Is Dad okay? Is Dad okay?" And I kept trying to tell her he was fine, but she was hard of hearing and the phone could not be held very close to her ear.

Unfortunately, the yelling made it harder and harder for her to breathe. She started gasping for air. The nurse kept insisting she put the breathing equipment back on, but my mom refused. "I want to talk to my son! I need to talk to my son!"

I knew there wasn't much we could do to communicate. And so I kept trying to yell "I love you, Mom. Everyone is fine. I love you!" I then asked the nurse to tell her that. And when she finally understood what I was saying, she burst into tears.

Her oxygen levels were getting dangerously low and she was fighting the nurse. And she just yelled out, "I'm so scared! I think I'm going to die! Tell Dad I'm sorry I can't take care of him! I don't want to die!" She kept repeating that over and over. The nurse had no choice and had to put the masks back on. My mom screamed and shouted "No! Please no! That's my son!"

And those were the last words I ever heard from my mother.

Gasping for air. Scared of dying. Worried about her family.

This moment has intrusively popped into my brain on a regular basis since it happened. It happens when I'm awake. It happens in my dreams. I have no control over it. I just have to keep experiencing it like it is happening for the first time.

After I saw that tweet from Shaun and then many others expressing the same thing (without the strategic aspect), my dread and trauma resurfaced with a vengeance. I've been reliving my mom's final words in my dreams. That moment keeps popping into my head. I feared the man I feel is most responsible for my mother's death may regain power and kill me and the last of the family I have left.

I keep asking myself the same questions over and over. What if there is another public health emergency? What happens to my trans friends if he turns the US into Florida and Texas? What will happen to the migrants at the border?

All I have is my two best friends. Katrina is gay and Delling is trans and disabled. All of us are vulnerable.

I wrote that post to help deal with the nightmares. Writing is part of my coping process. I didn't really expect it to go super viral. I just needed to get that out of my brain. But when people pushed back and started calling me evil and a collaborator and that I was valuing my life above those in Palestine, all with a huge heap of ableism, I found myself unable to let it go and not respond. I couldn't choose the healthy thing and step away.

While I feel I made some good arguments and put forth some solid ideas for other ways to handle this, I also got angry and lost my temper and stayed in arguments for way too long—all to my mental detriment.

My little world felt like it was collapsing and the world at large also felt like it was collapsing. I had personal horrors in my mind mixing with the horrors of this global conflict.

It was too much.

I don't regret what I posted. Many felt the same as I do. And I think my subsequent posts did a good job of expanding on my thoughts while also offering hope for alternate solutions.

But I do regret the timing and I wish I hadn't lost my temper. Especially in a reply I left with a lot of cussing.

People might disagree but I am hoping that people can understand the fear and trauma that influences my point of view.

I am actually willing to risk quite a lot to protect other people. Even people in faraway lands I don't know.

But I refuse to offer up the vulnerable to be sacrificed if it won't actually help anyone. That's what a Texas Lt. Governor would do.

#trigger warning #death mention #genocide mention

[kookies2000]

Ok, let's get caught up on Disney stuff and how their 100th year has been doing.

• Strange World loses money.

• Lightyear loses money.

• They cancel the Owl House, one of their most popular shows and biggest money maker.

• The let James Gunn go. The same guy that created GOTG. One of the biggest hero films in Marvel.

• Ant Man 3 under performs. Needed 560 million to make a profit.

• The Little Mermaid under performs. Needed 560 million to make a profit.

• Elemental under performs. Didn't deserve to, by the way. Marketing just sucked.

• Indiana Jones under performs, loses money. Literally needs 600 million to break even.

• Nimona gets released and reveals Disney's homophobic side.

• Haunted Mansion is going against the Barbie Movie. So good luck.

• And now the strike is going on. Bob Iger is refusing to compromise with them.

Man, "Wish" better be one hell of a movie to restart the Disney company on a good role. And even then, Wish has competition with Trolls 3. Which seems silly to some, but take a look at how big the Trolls fandom is. How many fan fics do we have on AO3? It's a pretty fair amount, bigger than Puss in Boots. And most of us are adults. That's not counting the kids who watched the first Trolls film on Netflix so much it's on the top 10. As for the 2nd film being released when theaters were closed due to Covid.

The 2nd film did well enough during a pandemic to gain a 3rd film.

So it is genuine competition since Trolls has a fandom behind them. Am I expecting Trolls to destroy Wish. Hell no! If anything, I'm expecting both films to do average. 200 to 300 million each. What I'm saying is "Wish" needs to be this grand finally in order to let Disney rest easy for a while. But Trolls 3 will be an obstacle.

The two golden moments Disney had were The Owl House season 3 finally. And Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.3, ending with a bang.

#Disney #writer's strike #haunted mansion #indiana jones #strange world #the Owl House #marvel #bob iger #writers strike

[writingonesdreams]

Avatar 2 first impressions

Spoilers ahead

A visually stunning movie with three main parts. The longest middle part focused primarily on the world of the sea, the breathing (reminded me of Wimhoff breathing techniques that got so trendy during the pandemic), the environment and sea life. Enchanting water scenes, I loved it.

The tukun whale like hunt was chilling to the core. You get these majestic intelligent creatures being killed for fun, sport and an anti age serum and it was heartbreaking. Like Seaspiracy. Impressive way to remind you what's happening to our seas.

I was missing Jake and Neytiri a lot. I loved them in the first movie and I loved all their scenes, but the focus decidedly shifted from them to their kids, which was...intentional on Cameron's part I guess, but I didn't like it. I'm too old to resonate with teenage narratives and their whining of "it's so hard to be special!" and "they just seem me as an outcast cause of my fingers" was annoying as hell. Like Jake was a Sky person, a human in artificially made avatar body - that's hostility and change your ways difficulty on another level. And he still made it as a warrior, chief and a legend. I guess it's unfair that they were born with these prejudice by no fault of their own...but damn, you would think they would be more secure in their idenity and who their dad is and what he achieved. Torukmakto for hell's sake! (The scene with Neytiri roasting Ronal for speaking disrespectfully to her husband was badass. Go Neytiri. You chose a pretty cool guy.) Human legacy is a shameful thing here with all the terrible destructive stuff they do, but Jake did what he did as a human, he was chosen as a human and for me that sends the message that there is still something good in humans/humanity, with individuals like Grace and Norm and those who fight for Pandora and nature. Like, get over yourselves having 5 fingers or cool powers no one else has.

Spider being a human boy so deeply entangled with the Na'vi culture also seems to make a point about this. Yes, humans are the main antagonists in Avatar, and they do horrible things, but Spider shows it isn't being human that makes you bad - it's what you are taught and what you ultimately choose to do with it. Being a Na'vi didn't make Quaritch a better person after all, even when he was learning a bit more about them.

Idk all these teenage idenity angst was just incredibly childish. Maybe it's justifiable for them being teens and all but seriously, why are you complaining you are special? I will admit they did adapt pretty well to the new sea world. They do take after their dad ;).

Jake has a very interesting conflict going on as a father. On one hand he is the legendary warrior, prone to life threatening downright suicidal stunts to do the right thing or fight to save the day. And his sons are very eager to follow his footsteps and "live up" to him. And Jake is understandably...not okay with this. He is scared. He wants to keep them away from the main action as scouts. Reviewers have been complaining Jake is a bad parent, that he had too much of a military approach and was hard on them, but wasn't Jake making the best of the situation? Invaded and in a secret attacks war on humans, trying to keep them all alive?

His distance and conflict to L'oak especially is reflecting this. Jake is teaching Neteyam right now, having him on flights and leading scounting missions from time to time. He is not ready to let either of them fight on their own, he is making baby steps of teaching the oldest, when L'oak comes with his reckless missions to prove himself. Jake just wanted to protect them longer. They were going at a different pace.

The refugee storyline is interesting and parallels the first movie. Coming to a new place, having to learn new ways and rules, adapting.

Jake didn't bring the distaster on the Metkayina from what I can see. Their tukuns were already hunted for the anti-age serum. They were coming either way, that's why that showed that scene and explicitly said the whole current invasion was financed by it. Jake and his family brought Quaritch after them, but a confrontation would have come because of the tukuns regardless. I don't know why so many are blaming Jake for all of that, he was just trying to protect the Omaticaya tribe and his family, by hiding them away.

Quaritch had an interesting arc. It was cool seeing Spider and the Na'vi way and nature having an effect on him - like Quaritch not killing any of the villagers on the Islands, with his personality and temper? Because Spider asked him? That was wild. And them giving up Kiri as his only advantage over the Sullys in the final to save Spider's life? I wonder if there is any chance of Quaritch ending up helping Pandora or Jake in the future. He didn't mind killing any of the wildlife/tukuns though...

That scene with Quaritch finding his dead original's body was chilling. That final there was epic.

The ending battle was way smaller in scale and too focused on the kids and their inability to save each other. Big applaud for Jake and Neytiri managing to save them so many times though. When it came to facing humans and Quaritch, they both lived up to their legendary warriors reputations from the first movie. Loved to see Neytiri going feral over her kids.

The last one on one fight with Quaritch was awesome. Close quarters hateful intimacy. The way Quaritch was making promises to hunt his whole family down and Jake who was on the leave, saying, damn it let's go now then, was pure moment of awesome.

I love love love that the final final scene wasn't any epic fight or whale attack or a big explosion. It was a eerie sad scene of the family divided into pairs trapped under the ship (Titanic vibes), with the children saving their parents. Jake being calmed and taught how to hold his breath by L'oak, Kiri using her connection with Eywa/nature to find and guide Neytiri out...and Spider saving Quaritch.

Idk it felt right and wrong for him to do it. On one hand Quaritch is too great an enemy to pass up of for sequels. And I understand and sympathize with Spider becoming kinda attached to him too and saving him in naive compassionate human stupidity. On the other I was really hoping for him to die and Spider's move felt like a betrayal to the Sully family he belongs to.

Anyway the kids showing that they are not completely useless and actually saving their protective badass warrior parents was great. I love when the caretaker role gets switched around a little.

Jake kinda balancing between being true to his risk loving fun sarcastic nature and a diplomatic proper Na'vi parent was part of his distance to L'oak. L'oak didn't see Jake asking Neteyam, if the bullies were worse off than his kids and that playful proud smile of his. He just saw Jake scolding him and trying to make it good as an unproblematic refugee to the local leader their staying depended on.

I didn't really understand or emphasize with L'oak feeling like an outsider although that was obviously the parallel that connected him to Panayacan. So he has 5 fingers, cool strict dad leading rebellions and armies left and right who would like him to stay safe as long as possible in a very unsafe world. People say Jake focused on Neteyam too much to see L'oak, but I honestly believe Jake was having a hard time allowing Nateyam to tag along in the first place. He couldn't take L'oak at risk too.

Then again I was really expecting Neteyam to die by the final fight. There was no tragic death in sight to mirror the first movie's structure, the danger was prevalent enough, the kids were being reckless enough...and I don't think it was avoidable no matter how much Jake tried. In war conditions like these, there was no way for everyone of his family to survive. Maybe if he accepted that fact sooner, he wouldn't be so strict with his kids and they wouldn't want to rebel and prove themselves so much. But then again, hard to accept a fact like that. At least they can all meat again in Eywa.

I liked Kiri. Total Jesus/Anakin Eywa made miracle child. She had that special connection with nature, just a shame they didn't figure it out sooner or that she didn't use it more. I was so happy about her controlling the corals to protect her siblings. Go Kiri! Her solitary thoughtful little meditations and connection to nature were beautifully made. Also Jake talking to his daughters was so doting and cute.

Why did they take Tuk to every possible risky place they could find? Did they just want screen time for her? Seriously. "We are going on a forbidden mission to warn an outcast tunkun. Let's take the youngest, most vulnerable and most likely to get captured or killed sibling with us." Pfff.

To sum up, it's an interesting movie with surprising emotional weight for it's simple plot, with breathtaking aesthetics and water shots that made you wanna protect and respect nature so much. Too much focus on the kids/new generation for my tastes, would have likes to see more of Jake and Neytiri, but they had a good conflict going on with their children, the right time to fight and to run and with protectiveness vs cause. It's not as good as Avatar 1, but I have some favourite scenes to rewatch anyway.

#avatar #avatar 2 #avatar way of water #review #analysis #movie review #jake sully #neytiri

[grigori77]

The Mighty Nein: Echoes of the Solstice (Live Show from Mo-fucking WEMBLEY!)

Ah, a hype man ... okay then ...

My ... he's quite salty really, isn't he?

"All the bar staff are like: What team is this? I don't know, but none of them make eye-contact."

He's got a point, we are better at swearing ...

"In this country, the sentence: I twatted the twat in the twat ... makes perfect grammatical sense!"

Ah yes, the first ĺive show since the Pandemic ...

Oh, here we go ...

Fuck me, look at that FUCKING CROWD ... O.O

Ye gods, Ashley what the fuck are you doing to us AGAIN?!!! Bloody hell ... then Liam ... and Taliesin? Look at that SWAG!!! MARISHA!!! Incredible ... Laura! Wow ... that's like ... AND Travis ... basically Jester and Fjord in the flesh ... just a shame Laura's not blue ...

And then we we have SAM FUCKING RIEGEL ... never misses an opportunity, does he?

Matt's going nuts and I don't blame him ...

Ah yes ... what fresh hell is Riegel gonna unleash upon us THIS TIME? The audience are ahead of us already ... oh gods ... no, you really AREN'T Freddie Mercury, mate ...

Bloody hell ... that actually WORKED ... I'm extremely surprised ...

Ashley has an announcement? Blimey ... no wonder she's a little nervous ... oh, but she's getting into it already ... Nice ... and yeah, Crit Role Red Nose Day, always fun ...

Cosplayer nod! Nice! Liam: "Oh man, so many Sprinkles!"

Yay! Animated intro WITH AUDIENCE PARTICIPATION!!!

Liam: "I've had this dream!" Matt: "Thank you all so much for the trauma!"

Recap! Nice!

Oh, so they WERE just Shunted, then? Okay, so what happened then?

So we're about to find out ... where are they? Shush, sound effects problems! Blightshore? Intriguing ...

Ah, so he CAN talk ... Caleb: "It's been a while." No shit, mate!

Oh, so the magical disruption has knackered the collar too ... batter that thing off, Beau! "You know, your wife has shaved me with a greatsword, this should not be too challenging for you." Oh, NOW he's rethinking this plan? Minor Alchemy?

Sam: "No, I want her to punch you!" Liam (as Caleb): "I'm sitting right next to her, it's going to happen!"

Oh crap ... Matt, what are you saying? What the fuck is THAT shit supposed to mean?

Ah, Imogen ... Beau: "She was kind of cute." Caleb: "Don't cross the streams!"

SNAP!!! Thankfully collar not neck, at least ...

Yes! Get her to Yasha! Go! With Caduceus? Awesome ...

Hey! The Blooming Grove! They made it ... oh, this is PRETTY!!! Calliope! Awwwwww ...

BABYYYYYYYYY!!! :3 Ashley: "I touch her everywhere, make sure she's fine! Well ... maybe not EVERYWHERE ..." Caleb: "I've seen them like this when they've been apart for a few hours."

CADUCEUS!!! Yeah, boy!

Ooh! Munchies!

New armour? Sweet ... the "Oh no, I have to leave in a hurry kit"? Intriguing ...

Dream Beau can be an asshole, apparently ... Beau: "But if you felt like exploring, maybe ..." Yasha: "Oh, I didn't know that was on the table!"

Oh yeah, Veth has, like, PRIORITIES now ...

Beau's accidental kleptomania ... XD

A splinter from the Nein Heroes? Intriguing ... and they're on the ship! Yay ... docked? Oh, hey, Nicodranas! Sweet!

Good lord, what are they doing? Matt: "How did we start this so horny?"

REUNION!!! Yay!

Jester's been getting headaches from her Sending ... yeah, that's right, makes sense ...

Perception check? Oh, first roll ... Travis: "Nine!" The crowd cheers! Of course they do ...

ALL of the Assembly ... yeah ... Trent Ikithon, of course, I thought so ...

Yeah, get Veth! Yay ...

Weird dead seabeast? What is that shit?

Matt: "Interrupt MY story, why don't you?"

A Message to the Ruby ... and she has to roll a D100? Nuts ... 48? 14 points of Psychic damage? Oof ...

Yes, she COULD heal herself, but it's par for thd course, really ...

Blud! Hi!

Spooked seabeasts ... hmmm ...

The Brenatto residence ... here we go ...

VETH!!! Yay!

Veth: "The world has been turned upside down!" Beau: "What's wrong?" Veth: "I HAVE A FUCKING TEENAGER!!!"

Luc wants to be an adventurer? Of course he does ... yeah ... how old IS he? Veth: "Whatever feels right!"

Veth: "To be fair, I was drunk for most of his childhood." XD

So what's the plan?

Oh, Scrying? Yeah, try it!

I love how Jester's being do sweet about Ludinus, it's hilarious ... oh, NOW she gets it? Jester: "He's a douche, I hate him!" Yeah ...

Here we go then, go Jester ... Travis: "That's right, use the 5th Level, nothing can possibly go wrong ..."

Jester has a DICK COLLECTION now? LOL

Reminding Jester who Trent is ...

Oh hey, here's Artigan! Nice! Oh ... how rude!

Caduceus: "We're not big problem people." Jester: "Are you saying we're NOT going to push the Moon back into the sky?"

Oh wait ... is Veth NOT coming?

Jester: "Um ... the Lavish Chateau is NOT a whorehouse." Veth: "A speakeasy with benefits?"

Luc? Hi! Wow ... he's an EMO TEEN now? Interesting ...

Veth making fun of Fjord being the weakest of the Nein ...

UNCLE Caleb ... :3

Jester! DO NOT give Luc a tattoo!

Wow ... Veth REALLY IS bowing out ... that's so sad ...

Veth makes Jester take another 8 points of Psychic damage ... XD

Wow ... AWKWARD goodbye ...

To the Cobalt Soul in Rexxentrum? Okay ...

Everybody runs into the circle ... wait ... WHST THE FUCK?!!!

Luc? Seriously? Wow ... he even has a Character Sheet! He's do cute ... :3

Here we are, then ... and they've just realised they're not alone ...

Sam's doing an emo teen voice now ... I love it ... this is gonna be SO MUCH FUN ...

Are we EVER gonna learn howold he is?

Yasha: "Hit me!" Seriously?

Oh, so we're doing this ... and she CATCHES his punch ... of course she does. Adorable ...

And now he's in a huff ...

And now he's gonna try and hex Beau instead ... this really is getting funny now ... Beau: "I'll cover my eyes to make it more fair." XD

Ah ... Caleb gives him THE TALKING TO ...

Wow ... he's really good at THIS ... oh, totally working the heartstrings, definitely ...

Oh wow ... they're coming around ... oh, so they're giving CAD the deciding vote? This'll be interesting ... and he makes a good point.

Ground rules from Caleb ... as it should be ...

Caduceus casts Death Ward on Luc just to be safe ... Nice one, mate.

Ovedo? Okay ... apparently things are chaotic ... oh, this doesn't sound good ...

Matt once again using the feedback constructively ...

Ah, teenage bravado ...

Volither ... hmm, nice hair.

Aggy? Who's that?

Dark tunnel? Okay ... no, DEFINITELY not Luc in the lead ... an extra luck roll for him? Nice one, Caleb!

Oh shit ... the magic seals are DEAD. Not a good sign ...

Crap ... what the hell is THIS shit? Oh, that's fucking CREEPY ... scary monster monologue ...

Beau just closes the door on whatever the fuck THAT was ...

Oh, it's still going? He does love to go on and on ...

Hello who's this?

Wait ... a guest? Oh shit! It's Daniel! You sneaky bastard ...

A dwarf? Intriguing ... a blue kilt? Even more so ... and WINE? Hmmmm ... a bit tipsy, apparently ...

Whoa ... he bested Beau? Wow ... and then he offers her a DRINK ... of course she accepts. XD

Aggy: "Is that a little boy?" Luc: "I don't trust this guy, he looks over 30."

Luc: "Hey! Don't insult me and then explain it to me!"

Yes, Matthew, what HAS HE found?

"Unattended baggage" ... SNORT ...

See Invisibility ... oh, hello, Star Razor ...

Eldritch Blast! Yay!

Aggy HEADBUTTS the wall Fjord just attacked ... wow, and he just NUTTED a dozen open. Cute ...

Constitution check? 9? Oh, and what does THIS mean? Oh dear ...

He thinks Caduceus is a horse ... I love that ...

Daniel: "I look like a very small, short John Wick, by the way." XD

Aggy just walks RIGHT IN ... and now there's more illusory nonsense ... wait ... the Shadowhand? Ooooh ...

Ah, so ... going down, then? Hmmm ...

Oh dear, this doesn't look too good ... what now, then?

Wow .. clearly Aggy is NOT particularly bright ...

Whoops? Holy shit ... Nice dodge! He's now tumbling down the stairs and FLASHING EVERYBODY ... oh dear, what now? Another dexterity roll? NAT20!!! Nice ... he is UNSCATHED ...

Daniel: "I am just sucking the Dice Gods' dick!"

He is almost ACCIDENTALLY good at this ... oh, here we go ... CRITICAL FAIL!!! Finally ...

Oh dear, what has he gotten into now? 76 points of Force Damage? Holy fuck ... is Aggy DEAD ALREADY?!!! Fuck ... a DISINTEGRATION TRAP?!!! Shit ... so that's it? Aggy is DUST ...

Farewell, Daniel ...

Oh yes, that's right, technically he IS an Admiral ... Admiral Tusktooth. Nice ...

DO NOT let Luc check for traps ... oh yeah! Mage Hand ... and Jester Guides him too ... :3

Wow ... that's a lot of traps ...

Another magic mouth ... for the gods' sake ... he's so full of himself ...

Another door? Okay ... check for traps again ... and ANOTHER mouth ... even MATT is now acknowledging that Trent is full of himself ...

Oh you ARSEHOLE ... not cool to taunt Caleb like that ...

Ah yes, the Tower? Sweet ... yes, rest.

The Aeorian Security Cannon ... and a FLUFFERNUTTER?!!! Holy fuck ...

True Seeing ... oh dear ... now Caduceus has Beau tripping balls again ... fuck, a Nat20 for a full 27 perception ... sweet fuck ...

Athtiri Menthal ... huh?

Beau has a +16 to her Arcana? Fucking hell ...

Ashley once again Stop It-ing Sam when he sneezes. VERY LOUDLY this time, too ...

They're fighting Trent AND a thing, or Trent AS a thing ... lovely ...

Okay, so rest and regrouping, then ... back to Caleb's tower, then head out in the morning ...

Mahogany? Hmmm ... certain dirty minds, I swear ...

Okay, then ... and time for a break! Well then ...

Aaaaaah ... Welcome To Wildemount returns ... always fun ...

And we're back ... Heroes' Feast! Nice ...

Caleb has a personal talk with Luc, and gives him his Luck stone? Wow ... oh fuck, WISH?!!! Seriously? 5th Level Simulacrum ... so he's now CLONED himself ...

Yasha: "Whoa! There's no riding going on! Except on me ..."

"Beth"? Hmmmm ... typical teenage boy, clearly ...

Beau and Yasha and AT IT ... of course they do. And Fjord and Jester. Liam: "No-one more competitive than Laura Bailey."

Good night's rest ...

Beau finds TWO Calebs TWICE as insufferable ...

Luc chugs the weird Potion ... oh boy, what's this shit gonna do? Oh crap ...

Whoa ... wait, what ... oh no ... extra confidence? Oh that's not good ... crap ... Luc is DEFINITELY gonna be even more reckless now ...

Death Wards on both Luc AND Fjord, then ...

Crown of Stars? Crazy ...

Caleb 2 is now a sabertooth cat ... of course ...

And so now Caleb has come home ... group stealth check! Blessing of the Trickster to Yasha? And she doesn't even need it ... but Beau TANKS it ... at least everybody else rolls spectacular ...

Now what?

Ring of Telepathy ... and Trent is still insufferable ... and fucking NASTY with it too ...

This is just gonna be a fucking RECKONING ...

No ... Caleb, DO NOT say your fucking goodbyes right now ...

Assault of memories ... ouch ... this is just CRUEL ...

Two undead presences? Oh you fucking evil bastard ...

Jester goes in with Caleb ... Beau and Yasha go round back ...

"Uncle Deuce" ... Caduceus: "Oh, I'd forgotten about that ..."

The bastard REALLY HAS brought Caleb's parents back ... that's fucking monstrous ...

Insight check ... oh yeah, they're not right, definitely ...

Jester just goes STRAIGHT to Turn Undead ... and they BOTH fail? Fuck ... that's effective, at least ...

I'm sorry ... the house just EXPLODES?!!! Fuck ...

34 points of Fire damage? Oh wait ... no, Fjord has some protection! Nice ... just 17, then. Same for Jester, too ...

Well, they're definitely NOT his parents anymore ...

BATTLEMAP!!! YAY!!! Cue Sam's plug for Wizzkids ...

And ROLL FOR INITIATIVE!!!

Jester Invokes Duplicity! :3 Awwwww ... tiny voice Laura doing the Jester voice is adorable as she directs Matt ...

She attacks Trent with her Spiritual Weapon and HITS!!! Nice ... but it just MISSES him? WHAT?!!! Meanwhile while the duplicates scatter, she bolts out the door ...

Yasha Rages and bamfs out her wings for Radiant Soul! Nice ... charging in to get ready for attack next turn ...

Beau POWERWALKS inside ... and attacks Trent from behind ... but the punch does NOTHING?!!! Seriously, what the hell?

She attacks the dad ghoul instead ... POP POP!!! But it resists the Stun ... Flurry of BLOWS, then ... and Patient Defense.

A METEOR SWARM?!!! Seriously?

And that is just OUCH all round ... crap ... thank fuck for saves for most ... Caduceus takes THE FULL DAMAGE ... and so does Luc? Crap ... but he has Evasion? Oh, so just half, then ...

Fjord casts Hexblade's Curse on Trent, then throws FOUR Eldritch Blasts ... a miss on Trent, first misses on the dead dad, but the other 2 HIT!!! Boof-boof!

The undead back off but Beau gets an Attack of Opportunity ... daddy is FUCKED UP ...

Mind of Mercury? Nice, Beau! And she gets the first HDYWTDT! On the dad ... oh dear ... well, it's a mercy, really ...

Rapid Cast of Chain Lightning from Trent ... oh no, Caleb just Counterspells ... but he can't actually see him, so it misses? Ow ...

Shit ... Caleb is DOWN ...

Caleb 2 turns into a T-Rex! Okay then!

Death Save 1 fails? Oof ...

Luc casts See Invisibility ... Trent is ACTUALLY hiding behind the tree ... Laura: "Like a little bitch!"

Caduceus casts Mass Heal ... 100 each? Holy fuck ... that is all round a SWEET FUCKING SAVE!!!

Jester runs to find Trent ... Fortune's Favour? Nice ... something that doesn't need line of sight? So she just casts Anti-Magic Field his magic! Nice ... that's it, he's now REVEALED!!!

Yasha charges in best she can ... but she can't attack now ... crap ... so she just casts Zealous Presence and YELLS in his face while flowering everybody else ...

Beau charges in too and just SWINGS for him with her staff ... and TANKS the attack roll! Okay ... second strike ... Fortune's Favour! Oof ... Flurry of Blows! FINALLY hits ... 14 damage plus Stunning Strike ... but he shrugs it off ... then 17 and another Stunning Strike ... but he uses Legendary Resistance even though he Crit Fails ... Extract Aspects ... he's resistant to ALL magic? Interesting ...

Fuck, is he running? What is this thing? An artifact ... oh shit, is he changing? What's he doing?

Sam: "Guys, we're fighting Trent Ikithon in Wembley Stadium!"

Everybody's blasted back ...

An orb of black shadow is just growing ... and now he's just a great horrible black shadow creature ...

Whoa ... a SECOND Battlemap? Fuck ...

It's the whole town ... Trent is a FUCKING KAIJU!!! He's suckimg the life out of people and stuff ...

Hexblade's Curse! Go, Fjord!

Caleb stays prone, jnstead turns into Gelidon the Nightmare in Ivory? Whoa ... and Matt has the miniature ready! Wow ...

Caleb 2 charges in with Luc still on his Dino back ... but they keep a safe enough distance ...

Luc casts Enlarge on the T-Rex! Fuck ... Matt doesn't have a larger model for THAT ... Godzilla is now loose in the streets!

It attacks Fjord with a tendril ... Liam: "Keep your hentai out of this!"

Caduceus runs to Yasha ... Holy Weapon to her, so she has boosts to all her weaponry! Nice ...

Jester casts Gate to pull Artigan through in front of the creature. SHIT!!! And he is suitably SHOCKED by what she's got him into!

Arty casts Chain Lightning on it ... 38 points of lightning damage! Nice ...

Yasha charges in and attacks! Lots of damage maths, apparently ... 101 points of damage in ONE FUCKING HIT!!! The crowd goes wild! She attacks again! Another hit! 59 points this time! Bloody hell ...

Beau rushes in znd attacks ... Nat20! Yeah! And another hit! 19 damage, then 16! Flurry of Blows ... 20 misses? Oof ... Debilitating Damage? Oh, okay ... and now it's vulnerable to Ice Damage? Nice, Beau!

Oh fuck ... EVERYBODY takes 31 points of Necrotic damage? Ouch ... now it concentrates on Yasha ... Ire of Oblivion? Oof ... a Nat20 save? So she only takes 70 damage? Oh great ...

There's a weak spot? Okay then ...

Even Sentinel with a Nat20 doesn't stop it? Crap ...

Fjord takes 2 swipes with the Star Razor ... both hit! 42 points of damage, snd a Divine Smite for an extra 16! Nice ...

It responds with a Void Claw ... Fjord just hits the brakes and it just MISSES him ... phew!

Caleb just brings his whole dragon mass down on it and vomits ice into its face! 77 points of Ice Damage! Nice ... and he has a Frightening Presence? Okay then ...

Caleb 2-zilla bites the thing's arse ... no joy! Claw strike! Hits! 21 points, then 14!

Luc looks for the egg ... he casts Brenatto's Voltaic Bolt, then shoots the gun into the egg! 26 points of damage to the artifact! Okay ... that looks to be the sweet spot!

Caduceus prays to the Wildmother, makes the creature's ichor turn into ice ... now he can see through it to find out how it works ... he pulls out Yasha's Holy Weapon and inflicts 26 points of Radiant damage on the creature! Cool ...

Jester teams up with Arty to hold her spell with him ... Guiding Bolt with his Enhancement ... balls ... shit roll spoils the shot ... crap ...

Yasha flies up and goes RIGHT for the egg ... and misses! Agh! Reckless! Go again! Another miss! FUCK!!! Oh Fortune's Favour! Okay ... balls! That was ALMOST awesome ...

Beau RUNS UP the creature! Holy shit ... she tries go reach into the chest snd tear the egg free ... strength check! Marisha: "WITNESS ME!!! NATURAL 20!!!" The crowd EXPLODES!!!

Matt: "Beauregard Lionett, how do you want do this?" AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

She tears the egg free, which pulls Trent into it, throws it into Caleb's mouth, and he BITES IT TO FUCK!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

Caleb has his vengeance at long last ... the survivors of the town applaud (as does the crowd). Nice ...

Jester congratulates Arty for saving the day ... oh flattery ... he gushes in response ... then she drags him into helping with the clean-up ...

The Calebs return to normal, Caleb sends what's left of the egg into some kind of nether realm. Then they big Luc up a bit, while still zlso grounding him.

Fuck ... Fjord just PROPOSED TO JESTER!!! AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! Matt: "You motherfucker!" Jester OF COURSE accepts ...

Caleb's cats prepare a feast for all, and there is celebration, but only a small victory against the larger backdrop of CHAOS from the Apogee Solstice ...

And that's it! Everybody takes a bow!

Well, this was a whole hell of a lot more epic than usual ... but altogether just the AWESOME reunion we wanted. I just hope it won't be the LAST time ...

#critical role #crit role spoilers #the mighty nein #echoes of the solstice #echoes of the Solstice spoilers #matt mercer #marisha ray #beauregard lionett #travis willingham #fjord stone #laura bailey #jester lavorre #liam o'brien #caleb widogast #ashley johnson #yasha nydoorin #taliesin jaffe #caduceus clay #sam riegel #luc brenatto #veth brenatto

[13docwriting]

NOTE: this post was made on November 26th, 2023, before the 60th specials aired. I wasn't going to post it but due to the recent episodes, I feel it really fits. It's me, more than a year after the Power of the Doctor! As time moves on and more spoilers / interviews / trailers / content comes out for the 60th (and then some), my already limited hope continues to dwindle for human kindness. Why? Here's my twenty page essay down below! (I'm not kidding, it's 20 pages)

The Thirteenth Doctor has been a life changer for me, as many could tell from my username. Chibnall's series came to me in the midst of the pandemic and a very hard time in my life. Ironically, my motivation for watching DW once again after more than a four year hiatus of the show was actually the idea of the Doctor being a woman. My reason to stay, however, was the stories we received. I've lived through the Chibnall and Jodie bashing on this hell-site in real time. I've read downright nasty comments on any/all of Doctor Who's social media posts about thirteen's series. I've seen people call each other horrible names for simply liking one of the Thirteenth Doctor's episodes... And now, as her series has ended a year ago, I'm even more saddened to see her era get pushed to the side as if to be forgotten. Nobody came at me with the whole "it's not because of Chibnall/Jodie's era! DW just needed a reboot!" I would have agreed! I would have agreed that a fresh coat of paint would have helped DW gain some more traction, especially in the states! The more people who watch DW, the better! But the change RTD is presenting and the continued changes come at the cost of dealing with bullies online and defending something I love with all my heart.

I'd like to remind everyone that Chris Chibnall did not just barge his way into Doctor Who. He has written episodes for DW for a while before he took over as showrunner. Tenth Doctor: 42 Eleventh Doctor: The Hunger Earth, Cold Blood, Pond Life, Dinosaurs in a Spaceship, the Power of Three. Recognize some of those titles? Yeah, even when I was a wee lass, those were some of the best episodes DW had ever done. "42" scared the crap out of me in the best way, "Dinosaurs in Spaceship" had me smiling ear to ear, etc. etc.

Don't just take my word for it, read some of the reviews for those episodes. They are highly positive if not still mid-range.

That being said, I have a hard time believing that every single one of Jodie's episodes have been awful. And, if not outright stated as awful, certainly below every single nuwho Doctor.

Was there some not-so-great episodes? Yeah, of course! But every Doctor has had some questionable episodes. With a show that has a new plot nearly every episode, you're going to have some misses! My point being... Chibnall CAN write good episodes and, with that being said... Why HAS Thirteen's era been considered one of the worsts? Well, I think it's because, as always, people hate change. We've just come off of Twelve's era which was rooted in deep and meaningful conversations with a underlying of, dare I say it, Time Lord Victorious. Twelve holds a special place in my heart for the amount of care he showed through his era. From the Twelve's darkest moments, Thirteen is born. Thirteen is a ray of sunshine that holds hope in the palm of her hand. She's happy, bubbly, and ready to smile. She wants the universe and everything it has to offer and she's ready to travel the stars again.

Chibnall introduces a series of stories that are rooted in that hope. There's kindness at every turn, there's compassion, there's empathy... Is that the reason people hate her era? No. A new Doctor has never stopped anyone from getting back into the show. So, it's the writing, you say? I have one thing to say to that: Prove it. Point me in the direction of bad writing without ONCE mentioning the word "woke". If you found Jodie's era to be preachy, perhaps there's a reason that you take offense to it. DW has always been a progressive show and it will forever stay that way. And I am the first one to admit that, again, there are weak episodes. There IS some bad writing, but the hate that Jodie's ENTIRE era gets, I feel, is unjustified. So, if not writing, must be the acting! Where? When? I had no problem watching Jodie Whittaker be the Doctor. She's quirky and fun and eccentric... She has a thousand different emotions on her face at one time. Any actor that knows how much a smile can hide is a talented one. Besides that, her work on Broadchurch and her newer works (One Night, Time) have some raving reviews. She clearly has talent. So, not the acting or writing... Companions, then? Why? "The fam" had all of their moments to shine. I won't say their character arcs were perfect, especially for Ryan and Graham, but they did have their own arcs. Was it the fact that there were three totally separate companions at once? Was it just too big a job? I can't answer that one. I personally felt that they all got a good ending, one that makes sense and that isn't tragic for the sake of tragedy. This my be my opinion piece, but I liked having multiple companions that had their own little storyline, but that's MY opinion and I'm fine with someone calling me out on that. Let's go really basic... It's because the Doctor isn't meant to be woman, right? Oh, so, the Master can be a woman and that's totally fine, but when it's the Doctor... Woman can be villains but they can't be the main protagonist, right? I didn't see people up and arms over Missy, why was Thirteen so different? I remember seeing her very first introduction trailer and having people immediately be upset by the gender change. Well, forget my opinions, let's look at the statistics and viewings numbers, right?

HOW ABOUT NO. Remember the writing strike that just ended? Remember how regular cable has been nearly done with? Remember how writers are fighting to earn something for streaming services? We can't rely on normal/live views while a literal pandemic was happening, while streaming has become the norm, while watching online for free has existed for so long... Views have CHANGED. The way people consume media has changed, especially during the pandemic. Now, for an excuse... The pandemic happened. It changed how people were filming, it changed how close people could get to one another in terms of acting, it changed filming times and locations. I can't confirm, but I know that the Flux storyline was cut by two whole episodes, which could be the reason a lot of people felt disappointed by the end of the Flux. Chibnall and Thirteen's era had so many real-life obstacles to overcome that past era's did not have to deal with.

I'm tired, alright? I'm tired of defending my love for a character. And to have that love be spat out in the form of a different writer by.... 1. Discarding the Thirteenth Doctor's iconic outfit after a regeneration for the first time ever (under the guise of calling it "drag" if Tennant was to wear her outfit even after a male co-star had just worn it.) 2. Introducing a very popular Doctor back into the show ("to gain views") 3. Doing a soft reboot by calling the new season "season 1" (could be Disney's fault, but I'm not entirely sure of that fact) Every day I read another article about how RTD is "saving" Doctor who when I myself have been saved by the Doctor already. I didn't ever need to justify my love of a character until today.

#anti rtd #doctor who #doctor who spoilers #dw spoilers #opinion piece #13th doctor #dw fandom #thirteenth doctor #dw

[for-a-longlongtime]

Wow. Y'all. I truly never expected so many awesome responses on the post I wrote last night about Dieter, Goya and Pedro on Talk Art. It is the first 'fun' thing I've written in so many years - after having felt blocked/paralyzed re: creative pursuits since 2020 (shit happened) -, without stressing about how I wrote it, and it means the world to me that so many people liked it and shared it.

I don't want to clutter up all the feeds by individually sharing and responding to the reblogs etc, so I'm throwing it together in one post here - because I want y'all to know I appreciate it so much. And it honestly made me even more excited that some of my favorite PP fic authors did so, because I've been enjoying YOUR work so much!

@chaoticgeminate Sending those hugs right back, and your fic was absolutely not a silly little piece! I truly love(d) it, and I'm glad it sent me down this little rabbithole. And yes, while writing that piece I also became more convinced that Pedro himself was a really big part in shaping Dieter and his background story. It's so damn intelligent and very much his style.

One thing I didn't mention yesterday (and I'm sure this is something a lot of people already spotted since the first day that the movie was online) is that I also came to realize how much Pedro has based Dieter's outfits and some mannerisms on Jeff Bridges' character The Dude from 'The Big Lebowski'. Never really saw that movie but I put it on today for a bit, and it was striking -- I'd even dare to say that the "'Bola, hold my hair!" moment on the toilet is a nod to how The Dude (who has longer hair) gets his face shoved into a toilet. Also, at one point when Bridges' character is addressed with "Mr Lebowski", he dismisses that and tells the guy to call him Dude, or even 'Duder' which, yeah, that's just a small step from 'Dieter Bravo'.

amycben on Reddit said the same thing about Bridges, and shared these Dieter pics, which definitely made it clear how our Feral Raccoon Boy's style is inspired by 'The Dude' <3 I don't care much for the Lebowski movie, but I love a good reference, especially since it's a Coen brothers movie - and we all know that Pedro now has a small role in Ethan Coen's upcoming movie 'Driveaway Dolls'. Anyway, I honestly hope that at some point Pedro will be asked about the work he did in shaping Dieter, because I'd love to hear more about this. There's no chance in hell that'll happen, because which journalist would ask him this? But I'm cool though if the universe wants to manifest one of us getting to interview him some time in the future, haha.

Anyway, again @chaoticgeminate - thank YOU really. I needed that deep dive more than I knew thanks to your writing!

@nicolethered thank you too for being responsible for my deep dive, haha, it were your screenshots that made me recognize the other Goya paintings! <3 (and I love your gifs btw!

@mysterious-moonstruck-musings well hearing from you that you loved MY writing is just such a super awesome thing after how much I've been enjoying your Dieter story! <3 <3

@julesonrecord I'M TOTALLY IN hahaha, I saw your comment right before I went to bed last night and it made me smile so much!

@imaswellkid I'm def not an Apatow person either, and I'll be honest - the first time I watched the Bubble I couldn't get past the first half, haha. But I later began to realize that you should indeed watch it through a critical lens and as a reflection about the craziness that was going on, rather than 'oh this is a movie about the pandemic'. The Mando bud is great btw! But even better is the Baby Yoda bud - I have no clue how growers/dispenseries (I'm in the midwest) get away with naming their product after Disney stuff, but I'm sure glad it got me to try that hahaha.

@lunapascal IKR artist Dieter is so damn underrated, and I'm so glad that at least a whole lot of fic authors are giving him more of what he deserves! OK and I totally want to write some too now, hahaha. Especially because there's a lack of Dieter x OMC/m!reader fics, which tbh needs to be fixed.

@survivingandenduring @sp00kymulderr @thesimulationswarm @pedrit0-pascalit0 @gemmahale @sin-djarin @perotovar @ladamedusoif @gracie7209 thank you so much for your kind words, they honestly mean so much to me! @angelofsmalldeathandthecodeine WOW, that Dali piece is fuckin incredible! And @basicoccult woahhh maybe y'all did!? See now I feel like I need to inquire about whether y'all take new initiates! <3

@chronically-ghosted God don't get me started, it's so tempting - next thing you know I'll have suckered myself into writing Dieter fic (while I'm only just getting started now on two other WIPs), haha. But yes I'm so curious about what the unspoken canon is there -- and most probably Pedro is the one with answers to that since it seems so much like he created Dee. I ended up googling some Apatow interviews this morning and saw that he set out to make the Bubble as a sort of Christopher Guest movie (the mockumentary style), and other articles said that there was a lot of improv involved - so obviously Pedro must've contributed a lot. Particularly because I've read at least interviews with four directors (Zeke who did Prospect, Craig Mazin from TLOU, I wanna say Patty Jenkins, and I'm currently blanking on the other name) who spoke about how involved Pedro was, down to specific dialogue and character's motivations etc in shaping the movie (I think Zeke said that Pedro worked with them to tone down Ezra's Shakespearian manner of speech a little, which I can totally see happening since Pedro has done/read so much Shakespeare and it's easy to picture that he wants to fine tune it so it's accessible enough for audiences). Ugh, it's probably gonna take a long while until there'll be any long form interviews with him again, and sadly interviewers are probably not gonna ask about any of this.

Re: painting or acting, yesterday I read @blueeyesatnight 's That's Not Your Name-Dieter fic (LOVED it, can def recommend it!) and one of the coolest things about Dee's character development there is that it indeed delves into 'okay how did he pick acting versus art' and more background story, plus how in the current day events of the story he is even making his own oil paint. That has become my headcanon now <3

@tessa-quayle I'm so glad you liked my post!! I really really wish that Russell and Robert would do another episode with Pedro. I love Russell in particular (sorta followed his work since Being Human was released, which holy crap was already 15 yrs ago?), but the way they attempted to interview Pedro back then was kind of a hot mess - and I say that lovingly hahaha. They were so enthusiastic that they talked over him so/too many times, so I'd love a tad calmer conversation where P has the opportunity to go more indepth.

@tvversionperson IKR there is SO much plot and character development to be explored with Dieter in that movie, which of course it doesn't have room to delve into but shit I wish they would/could. Or at least to just hear Pedro talk about what his thoughts are on it, because you know he most definitely had Dee's entire back story fleshed out in his head when he shot this movie.

Super long post, but again, I just wanted to thank y'all for the love. This is the first time I've done anything writing wise re: the PP cinematic universe, and all your responses have been so heartwarming and really encouraged me to do more stuff in one way or another with the Pedro boys, be it rabbit hole analysis or fic.

#pedro pascal characters #dieter bravo #dieter bravo x f!reader #goya #francisco goya #black paintings #saturn devouring his son #witches sabbath #two old men eating soup #he-goat men #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal #dieter bravo fanfiction #the bubble #art #talk art #painting #oil painting #mural

[sims-for-semi]

acknowledgements

Surprisingly, it's been harder to write acknowledgements than to have written all this simfiction HAHAHA. Where to start?

I'm happy. I'm very very happy, because not only did I have the opportunity to write about something I love, but because over the course of these three years I have shared with a lot of people aaall over the world, and it has been a rewarding experience in every way. Yes, it wasn't the best novel in the world, but as I mentioned before, I was draining myself of energy as time went on, getting my college degree, starting to work and all that.

If you've been following me for a while, and I know many of you have, you'll know that this started just because I finally had a little bit of time during the pandemic to sit down and get things done. It's been three years since then and damn, it's taken me a hell of a lot longer than expected to finish. Anyway, I'm glad I set out to get it done even though I wanted to give up halfway through, because 1. I like to deliver 2. I owed it to myself. Next year I'm going to be 20 years playing The Sims, and how until then had I not been able to create a silly little story about my favorite video game characters?

One of my missions while writing everything was to be able to maintain some of the gameplay while setting up scenes and editing in Photoshop. Could it have been better? Yes, I'm sure it could. But I also know that I had as much fun as I could have had doing it all.

Simblr is such a wonderful community. I am fascinated to be able to share something I am so passionate about with you. It is a privilege for me that my posts have reached so many people. Who would have thought we were all so invested in the Goths and old, boring Pleasantview.

To wrap things up, I'm gifting you my "Pleasant Valley" so you can read it from the beginning. It's yours. It's ours.

And with the risk of forgetting some people, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart:

and also guallarauco, Piperamitt, tamagniis, da3stars, aheavenscorner, Strangetownfan21, and spookythings as well as the 20 guests that left kudos on AO3. Your support, your likes, your reblogs were FUNDAMENTAL for me to keep writing.

@rurpleplayssims

@plumbtales

@clouse-playssims

@jsasimmer

@keoni-chan

@weirdnerdearnest-blog

@lulousims

@al-pomegranate-seeds

@bluemasims

@janika31

@cindysimblr

@silverspringsimmer

@dearsimmies

@simstationdance

@plumbbobtoggle

@missplayer30

@renfree

@cozy-sims

@cyberafterglow

@gordonlegacies

@midsummersunrise

@riosimblr

Gracias totales 💗

#pv extra #yes i'm crying its 2am and i have to work tomorrow #personal #simfiction

[recurring-polynya]

Idk if you’ve answered this question (sorry if you have) before, but how do you think Renji & Rukia first met ? What do you think their life was like originally before Soul Society ?

Pardon me if I'm reading this wrong, but...Rukia and Renji's first meeting is enshrined pretty thoroughly in canon? She rescued him from a water heist that was about to turn disastrous.

This is from Chapter 98/Episode 32: A Star and a Stray Dog, which is the first place you should be looking if you're interested in pre-canon Renruki lore.

As to the second part of your question...you mean before they died? What sort of lives did they have in the World of the Living?

I'm gonna pontificate, so I'll throw that under a cut

First off, I am fascinated with the fact that Kubo gives us nothing about what anyone's living life was like. On one hand, I would like to know everyone's pre-history, but on the other, I'm glad he didn't, like as a literary choice. The slate is supposed to be wiped clean. It doesn't matter. It's maddening, but also correct.

It's also one of those places that is just ✨fanfic free real estate✨ in terms of I think everyone should make up their own version for their blorbos, so of course I have them for Renji and Rukia. I have absolutely nothing to support these, they are just what I felt in my heart.

I have actually talked about Renji's beforedeath quite a bit, here and there in various fanfics, usual under the conceit that, particularly in their Inuzuri days, he would sometimes blurt out some half-remembered thing and then promptly forget it again. Here an excerpt from Chapter 3 of go places:

It’s an Alive Memory, Rukia is nearly certain. Most souls get them. All the boys did, from time to time. To Renji, it’s just brain dust. Whatever it is in Soul Society that makes people forget their lives also makes this memory detritus slippery to hold onto. Renji won’t think of this later, or attach any importance to this conversation. The funny thing is, after ten years of watching him stumble through these moments, Rukia probably has a better idea of what Renji’s life was like than he does. He lived on a farm of some sort. A small one, or at least his family grew a lot of their own food. He died of a fever. Nearly all of his Alive Memories involve his mother. Rukia is almost positive that Renji’s mother is the one who taught him to write. The sewing scissors were likely hers. In Rukia’s imagination, Renji’s mother is very tall and beautiful and kind. Rukia doesn’t need to use her imagination to know that Renji loved his mother very much.

Just to offer a little more detail--doing the math out, where Bleach starts in the early 00s, Rukia and Renji have been separated for 40 years and knew each other for 10 years before that, it would make a lot of sense for both of them to have died in WWII. However, I like to think that time is very wobbly, especially in the outer Rukon, so I like to make their deaths a little earlier-- specifically, I think that Renji died in the 1918 flu pandemic, which may have contributed to getting a plague spirit for a zanpakutou. That being said, my general vibe for his childhood is based on Kanta, the neighbor kid from My Neighbor Totoro, which takes place in the 50s. In any case, he had a pretty small and unremarkable life in rural Japan, aside from the fact that he was loved very much, which will never be unremarkable, no matter how common it may be.

I have written less about Rukia's beforedeath, mostly because she was too young when she died to have any phantom memories. [Note: I know there are some theories out there, based on some arcane clues that Kubo has dropped that Rukia may not actually be a normal soul and may be related to Hell. That's...fine. While I'm never going to say no to a storyline that centers Rukia, I really do hope that it comes to naught. Ichigo has enough Crazy Origin going on and I like the Rukia's backstory the way it is, so I'm just going to ignore all of that for the sake of this post]. Ahem! So, infant death is not anything surprising, or even really interesting, but what makes Rukia's kind of compelling is the fact that her much-older sister died at the same time. To me, this indicates either a natural disaster or a death-by-violence.

As I said above, there are infinity ways you can go with this, but to me, there were two important things I wanted to capture 1) given Renji's descriptions of Rukia having an inherent grace and nobility, and the idea that something about Hisana caught Byakuya's eye, I thought that maybe they should have been noble, and 2) I wanted them to live by the sea. I do not actually remember how I landed on this, but in the 1850s, a bunch of sea fortresses were constructed to protect Japan by attack from sea (see here for more detail). This was the tail end of the Edo period and I liked the idea that maybe Rukia came from an old samurai family, and her father was sent to oversee one of these coastal forts. Did they die in a bombardment? A bad storm? The Kanto earthquake? I never got that far. I'm not even sure if this is a realistic scenario, if they had civilians living there, etc, this was just a half-thought-out thing I came up with for a bonus chapter of a fanfic that someone requested once. The one other detail from that that I came up with and stand by is that I think there were more siblings in their family between Hisana and Rukia. I also like that this idea that makes Rukia somewhat older than Renji, even though the math is impossible and the points are made up anyway.

#rukia kuchiki #renji abarai #beforedeath is a great companion word to afterlife which i just made up for this post but i hope it catches on

[yooniesim]

tw: death mention, cancer mention, oversharing, long-winded self-reflection, far too many paragraphs

The strides I have made with my temper in the past year... real talk... I'm proud. It's been hard to manage myself and keep from popping off but I've been making a lot of progress removing myself from situations that get me heated, irl or online, and I'm happy about that. It doesn't remove my feelings or the damage I've caused with my anger in the past but I feel like I'm making real progress. Even though my depression and overall mental health varies, I feel like temper wise I'm in a lot better place than I was a year ago. I've been staying away from people irl that fed into my anger by being neglectful or abusive to me, and tried my best to work on my own actions at the same time.

I'm also proud of where I'm at with my blog comparatively. I've been working hard to focus on the good things and what makes me and others happy, rather than falling into a pit of negativity. I feel like I can still express myself from time to time, while also being better able to know what is appropriate to say and when. Idk if this is just especially ND of me but I feel as if I had the belief that as long as I felt whatever I was saying was the truth, it was appropriate, and that the negativity wouldn't get to me if I stayed by that metric always. But that isn't always the case, and i'm getting better at evaluating that. At realizing that, even with good intentions, getting wrapped up in all the issues of the world and all the negative discussions can be almost a form of self-harm.

Not many people know about this, but the trauma i experienced during the pandemic really affected me and changed me a lot. If you're a long time follower comparing how I was pre-2020 and after, it probably feels like I changed completely as a person, because I did. I don't speak about it a lot, especially now that it feels like the entire world has... moved on, but. Being a healthcare worker then felt like seeing your own slice of hell. Seeing that much death firsthand and being so afraid every single day, being confronted with your own mortality and that of your loved ones, it's extremely difficult. Especially since I lost a very close relative to a drawn out battle with cancer, who I was a caregiver to, as well. Between that and finally being medicated for the first time in my life, i became numb, and at the same time, I became angry. Angry at every little injustice that crossed my path. I wanted to fix something, anything- even in a silly little community for a silly little sims game. I thought, maybe, shining a light on things I saw that were wrong- scamming, doxxing, bigotry- might help. I broke myself apart trying to do that. And... for what, really? I accomplished nothing. And to this day still deal with people that boil me down to just... a hater, I guess. Too annoying for their personal tastes. As if that alone justifies some of the truly vile things that have been said and done to me, publicly and privately. That continue over a year after the fact. Even now it's difficult to think about sometimes.

I've made many mistakes here. Being an inexperienced and flat out incompetent server owner, to start. But with that, too, I've made progress. I'm so grateful for the mod team I have in Sutopia now. For the loving community that's risen from the ashes of what was once an overly negative space. For me getting a handle on my own love of petty gossip, a fatal flaw. For me learning how to ban instigating and toxic parties instead of naively giving them the benefit of the doubt. I still struggle- because as much as people might think I'm harsh, seeing as I try to put up that front as much as possible, I'm actually far too forgiving to the point of stupidity at times. I've been paralyzed by indecision in the past, not wanting to hurt anyone by mistake with the wrong call, and wound up hurting everyone involved with my inaction instead. But I know now that I have a more experienced team beside me that helps so much with these decisions and ensuring a safe place for everyone. And that's taken a weight off of me for sure.

Occasionally, still, the anger gets to me. I see someone that I know for a fact has scammed someone, or hurt someone, or flat out lied, or harassed me in anons or said something racist about me in private that they have no idea I know about- and they're just continuing on, getting love and adoration over their sims or cc or something, and it gets to me. I want to post, I want to blast everything on here and say, look! They're not what you think! Look what they did! Look who they really are! But then I breathe, and I think. Would it really help? Would it really do anything? Would I be opening myself up to be attacked and hurt for nothing? And I come to the humbling conclusion that it's not worth it. Not worth it for them to come back in a month with a new name and all their friends welcome them back like nothing happened and so simblr continues on as it always has. And I'm just a "hater" that's probably jealous of how many friends they have or how much money they make whatever other egotistical explanation they'd spout after everyone inevitably forgot what really happened. Occasionally, it makes me feel a little sick.

But, I breathe through it. I'm getting better at that. Sometimes I write something long out in the drafts- like I'm doing now- and delete it right away instead of posting it. It helps. Even though sometimes I feel guilty. I think about the anons I used to get, the people saying they were too scared to call out certain creators for certain actions because of how big they were and how much hate their followers would send, I think about the asks I still have in my inbox of screenshots and proof. About how sometimes people would thank me for saying things they couldn't bring themselves to. That I was the only person doing it. The only person who wasn't afraid. Even though I was only "unafraid" because I could barely feel anything at the time. And I don't even have that "advantage" anymore. But it weighs on me thinking that I should be trying to help them still. But how can I help anybody? I'm biased, too. I make mistakes. I've made so many mistakes. What gives me the right to say anything? Being put on that pedestal and having that responsibility on my shoulders- stupid as it was from the bigger perspective of life- hurt me, too. Because no one has the right takes every time, and having the wrong one on occasion doesn't automatically make you a terrible person. But it's extremely difficult for people on the internet to understand that. Sometimes I feel used when I remember those times. Chewed up and spat out, once the flavor wore off. And violated, not by the anons or anyone that disliked me, but by people I thought were friends. That's always the worst part to think about.

.....Until I decide it's time to leave, anyway. Then you're all going down.

It's better not to expose myself, or others, to that again. Is that growth? I don't know. I still struggle with so many emotions. The anger, and the guilt. Regret and sadness. But then, I've also felt so much joy from here, too. When I talk to people in the server, when I help people here with their cc projects/requests, when I read people's stories, when I talk to nice anons. I still love talking to anons so much, and want to have in-depth, rambling discussions with them again! I love to laugh with my mutuals and share our silly little sims together. And, god, sometimes I feel relief. Like, there's nothing for me to prove, no one for me to impress. I can do whatever I want and not worry, because well- so what if I get blocked? Or talked about? Like what else is new lol. I don't need to focus on the community. I just need to focus on me, my posts, my mutuals I already know are kind people. It's a freeing feeling. And it makes continuing to express myself here worth it. I want to concentrate on that. The positivity, the love. The creativity. The people here that warm my heart with their kindness. So I think, as we continue into December and into the New Year, and every year I'm here beyond that, that's what I'll do. Continue to grow, and share the love.

#ceci speaks #nonsims #text #negative #kinda? #ceci speaks a lot more #rambling at night bc depression #kinda positive at the same time tho! #simblr's boogeyman has a heart #yoonie steals christmas #gif warning #get ur screenshot tools out folks its that time again #📸 #ceci needs to go back to therapy #yeah yeah im workin on it

[hsfan94]

This imagine was so sad, I'm crying right now, bestie 😭😭😭😭😭 plsssss we need a happy ending

Pt 2

Harry couldn’t stop thinking about her all through dinner with Olivia. He couldn’t lie and say he’s never thought about her like that. She was definitely the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen but he just thought they’d be better off as friends because he couldn’t bear to lose her. But now, as he was thinking about the last five years and how close they had gotten during the pandemic, he realized just how much he cared for her. He thought about when they first met. They had met through Niall actually and he had thought they would make a good couple.

“Harry mate, I’m not kidding you’re gonna love her. She’s like the female version of you.”

“But I already told you I didn’t want to be set up.”

“It’s not a date, lad. I just want you guys to get to know each other. Here she is.”

“Hi, I'm y/n. Ni has told me so much about you.”

“Harry. Are you still with me?” Olivia chuckled.

“Yeah yeah. Sorry. Just tired.”

He wasn’t stupid. He knew y/n didn’t like Olivia and maybe that was why he didn’t talk about the relationship to her. But even that justification didn’t stop his heart from cracking, thinking about what she said and as he sat here with Olivia he was starting to see things a little clearer.

“We should talk.”

“What about?”

“Us. I don’t think it’s working.”

“Harry are you sure you’re okay? This is random.”

“Is it? We just made up from a huge fight.”

“Exactly. You don’t make up just tor break up a week later.”

“We’ve always had issues. This was never gonna be forever Olivia. We want different things.”

“This isn’t about me at all is it?”

“What?”

“It’s her. I heard her say we were broken up. What did she say before that? That she loves you?”

He didn’t answer.

“Right. Fuck you.”

Just like that she walked out of his life as quickly as she had entered it.

Y/n hadn’t heard from Harry and she was honestly thankful. She wasn’t ready to answer questions about it. She wasn’t too shocked either. He really is a busy bee. In fact, she didn’t expect to hear from him until they were both back in Los Angeles in a few weeks as their homes there are right next to each other. She figured they both needed the time and space to think things over.

What she didn’t expect was to be woken up at three in the morning on October 20th to a pounding on her door.

“What the hell-“ She cut her sentence short at the sight of a disheveled Harry.

“Harry? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I just got in a few hours ago and I had to see you.”

She beckoned him inside and closed the door.

“I’m sorry I woke you up.” He smirked at her sleep covered appearance.

“No worries, you are always welcome here. What’s so urgent?”

“I love you.”

“I know I love you too but I hardly think that warrants an early morning visit.”

He thought her confusion was adorable.

“No, y/n. I’m in love with you.”

“What?” She froze.

“I think I always have been or at least since 2019. I think that’s why I didn’t want to talk to you about Olivia, I felt guilty. But I broke up with her that night because all I could think about was you and what you said.”

“This is a joke.” She was just staring at him blankly.

“It’s not, lovie. I love you so much and the only reason I haven’t called is because I didn’t want to have this talk over the phone.”

“I love you. So much.” She started crying.

“Hey, hey, hey. Don’t cry baby. This was supposed to make you happy.” He pulled her into a hug.

She looked up at him from his embrace.

“I am happy. I can’t believe this is real.”

He couldn’t wait any longer.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Of course you can, consent king.”

They both chuckled at her nickname and then he leaned down and kissed her. It was magic. He couldn’t believe he had waited so long to kiss her but now that he had he would never kiss anyone else.

They pulled away with huge grins.

“Wow,” he said.

“Yeah.”

“Let’s do it again,” he said enthusiastically.

“We can do it as much as you want. Does this mean you’re my boyfriend now?”

“No. That title doesn’t seem fitting. Can I be your everything?”

“You already are,” she said and then kissed him again.

#harry styles #harry’s house #famous harry #harry styles angst #harry styles fic #harry styles fluff #harry x reader #harry pls #harry update #dont worry darling #niall horan #one direction

[strangerthings4theories]

Honestly, I truly believe, amongst all the other batshit theories that everyone has made about Season 4, that there was supposed to be more about the Russian prison in Kamchatka but for some reason, whether COVID-19 related or not, they couldn't do it.

You pointed out that the part of that prison we see in Season 3 doesn't match & never matches with the ones we see in see in Season 4.

All of this never comes back & there is no explanation why. And what we saw in Season 4 & what it made it out to be was so small compared to what we see here... I even find it hard to believe that even with the amount of power the Upside Down has, including it's creatures, it was able to take down an entire facility of that size especially since it seemed like the creatures where locked only in a specific place. (And again, given the rules of ST, there should have been a gate open in Russia for a long period of time, for what they were doing to work but this is never brought up at any point...)

Hopper couldn't have possibly been the American because we saw in Season 4 that he was somewhere else before getting to this specific base & he never goes to that specific part of the prison. It wouldn't make sense for him to be there, go somewhere else then come back. Plus we don't get any real reason why he wasn't given to the Demogorgon during that Season 3 scene.

Whether it was Billy or someone else, this just doesn't make any sense that there wasn't supposed to be more to it.

I'm choosing to be optimistic here but since we barely know how the Russians know about the UD & what they want to do with it, including the logistics of how they were able to pull off what they pulled off in S3, I'm thinking that we are going to go back to it in Season 5 because if not, this is the weirdest & most incoherent side plot in history.

No no you're totally right though. And I'm glad someone else feels this way.

The Russia plotline still doesn't make sense to me. Not in the slightest. I'd go so far as to say I'm not sure why the story even went to Russia. Absolutely nothing happened there to justify the setting. Hopper didn't need a Big Damn Hero moment because he's already had several, and everyone knew Hopper and Joyce would get together. There were no surprises, no revelations that made me think, "Omg this is why the story took us here." It was actually... um... pretty boring???

As someone who's gone over S1-3 with a fine toothed comb, that was a genuinely shocking thing to see. With every other plotline in the show, I've been able to say, "Oh this is what they were trying to accomplish with that." Not so with Russia. It's a mess that doesn't really achieve anything narratively or thematically.

And it just happens to be the plotline that, up until the last two episodes of S4, seemed to be prepping us for Billy's return.

Hell, even episode 8 went in that direction at first. When Hopper found the adolescent Demogorgon writhing in pain on an operating table, I legit freaked out! It was the perfect foreshadowing for him finding Billy - the teenage boy who's been written off as a monster, but actually deserves our compassion. Seriously, I couldn't have written it better.

And then we got... nothing? Nothing at all?

Lol nahhhhhh. Shit ain't right. I'd sooner believe they got screwed over because the pandemic took away their access to Dacre.

#billy hargrove #chief jim hopper #kamchatka #stranger things theory #stranger things analysis #stranger things 4 #billy hargrove is alive #billy hargrove is the american #answering your mail

[dopaminestarvedsim]

Thanks for the tag, @ethicaltreatmentofcowplants!

What's your Resolution for your Simblr?

First of all, to be very honest, I just want to keep doing this! I've had so many lil side hobbies end up in the ADHD hobby hopping graveyard, but this has been so fun for me and I've already seen my building get better. Something about having some community (hi, mutuals! thanks for interacting! you give me motivation!) to share my creations with keeps me excited about trying to get better at building - which would be my other resolution, I think. Building and exploring challenges & rotational gameplay.

What do you want from the Sims Franchise?

[Confession: The Sims 4 is the first Sims game I've ever played. I actually never played video games as an adult (beyond the random testris/solitaire on my phone) until the pandemic hit when I got a switch to play ACNH and my brother-in-law told me if I liked that I needed to play The Sims. And it's been ridiculous since then, to the point that I have all the freaking DLC and everything. 🤦🏼‍♀️ With that being said, I feel so new to the Sims community, that I've never been very critical about the game. Most of the time, I find the glitches hilarious (see my last post with the infant spider arms from hell) and I don't have anything to compare the gameplay to that would make me feel disappointed. I can DEFINITELY see the criticisms and agree with them, but I guess I'm more easily able to take the game for what it is and mod the shit out of it to play how I want to be able to play. And since I didn't play the older games, I don't spend much time pining for other elements that are missing in the Sims 4. I just don't know what I'm missing. There's also still SO MUCH I haven't even played with in the DLC I've already bought.]

I do think fairies would be fucking cool though. 🧚🏼‍♀️

And it would be even cooler if my sims didn't get burnt out on their second days of work. Especially when they're in a career that matches their skills and interests. Like tf? We need some realistic tuning to some of these gameplay mechanics, for sure.

Oh, oh, and I really hope they continue to collaborate with Simmers. I think that's really cool, because they know what the average Sims player wants more than anybody.

Any other New Years Resolutions?

First and foremost, my focus is to keep my nervous system better regulated. But I also want to get outside in the sunshine and move my body more. I've been so sick the past few years that I've become very deconditioned, so the goal is to very carefully start to build my strength back up. 🥲

I also want to get to the point where I'm able to save money again. Specifically, I would like to get to the point where I can afford to start a separate savings "pocket" in my business account to save for EMDR training!

TAGGING: feel free to play along if ya wanna, @acidheaddd, @d4isywhims, @simstrashkingdom

#ts4 #simblr resolutions #sims 4 #the sims community #ts4 tags #simblr

[icelandsgirl]

Nordic 5 as random comments on the Internet

Denmark: Isn't that ironic?

Norway: That's a coincidence, not irony.

Denmark: You must be fun at parties.

Norway: I don't 'party'.

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Sealand: This song makes me wanna put a fork in a microwave for no reason.

Iceland: Yes, please do that. It will create a fireworks show inside your house.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Finland: Oh, hi Sweden. Didn't we recently get married?

Sweden: Funny seeing you here.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Iceland: Joe is Biden? Fuck, I meant, Joe is president?

Denmark: Breaking news, Joe is Biden!

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Denmark: Danish food is being better!

Norway: Nice English, degenerate.

Denmark: Your mother is detergent!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Denmark: I'm crying.

Finland: Why?

Denmark: You are the because!

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Norway: I'm satanizing the laundry room.

Iceland: Do you mean sanatizing?

Norway: No, the laundry room has been to holy recently.

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Denmark: You need to have at least negative one years of experience and speak United States.

Iceland: I think I'm overqualified for this position.

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Denmark: Don't be embarrassed, Norway! I love you!

Norway: You're just saying that.

Denmark: No, I mean it, I promise. I will give you babies to prove it!

Norway: I don't want rabies!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Finland: Why are you sitting in the dark like a weirdo? Come to dinner.

Sweden: Hitler.

Finland: No, he's not invited.

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Denmark: I'm tired of pride flags, show me some shame flags.

Iceland: Show me some downright regret flags.

Norway: Google, show me a photo of the American flag.

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Norway: The instruction manual is included but is only in several different dead languages.

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Finland: I recommend avoiding general and often dehumanizing "the" labels such as the poor, the mentally ill, the French, the disabled, the college-educated. Instead, use wording such as people with mental illnesses. And use these descriptions only when clearly relevant.

Denmark: People with French.

Iceland: People experiencing France.

Norway: People with French illnesses.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sweden: Dishes done by 3 PM, okay?

Sealand: I get home at 3, is 3:15 okay?

Sweden: If I look on the camera and they aren't done by 3, there will be consequences.

Sealand: I can't have them done that fast!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Finland: My curfew was 9 PM on school days.

Ladonia: On school days? My curfew is 9 PM on weekends.

Sealand: My curfew is 6:30 PM, no matter what.

Iceland: You guys are able to go outside?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Norway: This lockdown is God's way of telling you that you go out too much.

Iceland: Sorry everybody, this entire pandemic is my fault fot not staying home, my bad.

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Finland: How the Hell do you set spatulas alight?

Norway: Well... it's a long story, but you would be amazed, I've managed to do it multiple times.

#aph norway #aph sweden #aph denmark #aph iceland #aph finland #aph ladonia #aph sealand #hetalia incorrect quotes

[formula1kate]

A Dubai Reunion

I should have never trusted Oliver. That man could convince me of anything, including going on a last minute vacation to Dubai, where he had promised that his brother wouldn't be accompanying us. But there he was, sitting across from his brother and his brother's girlfriend, looking at his phone through his sunglasses and not even realizing my presence here at the table.  

It's not that Lando and I weren't friends. In fact, we were closer than Oli and I were, but things had changed recently. As Lando had continued to move further and further into the rankings of racing, we saw each other less. We still saw each other a lot, but less than we were when we were eight to fourteen years old, or even before we could talk. When Lando got into Formula One, he invited me to a couple of races per year, and this year was no exception. While there was a pandemic, there was still a limited number of passes that the driver's were allowed to give away for the season, and Lando very kindly gave me one of his. But Lando didn't appreciate my friendliness with the other drivers. It wasn't even flirting, it was genuinely me being friendly. The specific driver that always managed to get Lando upset was Pierre Gasly. 

Pierre and I had become good friends since I met him in 2019, but of course, we were not as close as Lando and I. Besides our yearly Christmas get together, the last time Lando and I had spoken was when we got into an argument in Monza. It was Pierre's maiden win, and I was excited and happy for him. The happiness quickly faded when Lando accused me of prioritizing Pierre over Lando and I's friendship, which obviously wasn't true. 

I was patting myself on the back for deciding to wear some actual clothes and not the pajamas which I had considered wearing down to breakfast. Although, I still wasn't looking my best, it was better than pajamas. I had put on a pair of dark blue sweat shorts and a black bikini, which was under my shorts and what I wore as my top. Since we were having our breakfast by the pool, it wasn't too obscure to do.

Oli was showing Savannah, his girlfriend, something on his phone, so no one at the table noticed my presence. Which was probably for the best because my shock from seeing one of my best friends unexpectedly sitting at my breakfast table would have been noticeable to any onlookers.  The only empty seat was next to Lando, so that's where I was forced to sit. 

Oli looked up at me and I immediately sent a glare his way. It was in this moment that I realized by the twinkle in his eye that he had lied straight to my face when I asked if Lando would be joining us on this trip. Oli didn't say anything about the situation, and instead addressed the whole group. 

"Anyone want to do anything specific today? Or just lay around by the pool?" 

Lando didn't say anything, just continued typing away at his phone. Sav just shrugged. 

"I really want to go on one of those quad bikes in the desert. They look really cool and I've never been on one," I spoke, looking directly at Oliver and not the boy to my left; but that didn't last long as I automatically turned my head when there was a reaction next to me. 

It was a good thing that Lando has had years of neck training, otherwise I reckon he would've had a severe case of whiplash. He turned his head to the side and moved his sunglasses to the top of his head -- I guess to make sure he was really seeing me sitting next to him. It was probably quicker than his best reaction to the lights going out on the grid. 

"What the hell are you doing here?" 

"I was invited, Lando," I informed him. 

There was silence from both of us. Oliver broke it by saying, "I'm going to ask the front desk about quad bikes. Sav, you coming?" 

"Yep, I'll come," she said. 

I gave Oliver a pleading look as he got up to leave me alone with a boy who was currently looking down at his phone. He shrugged and then smiled at me before walking away and leaving me with Lando. 

I had seen rumors on Instagram about Lando coming to Dubai to see a girl, although I didn't really know anything about her. I'd just seen from some Lando fan pages which popped up on my explorer page that he had been liking all her photos and commenting emojis on her posts.  But I don't know if that actually means anything and when I asked Oliver about the topic before Christmas he said that he didn't know if they were dating, and that Lando hadn't said anything about her. Although I assume that Oli was trying to spare my feelings, as I know better than anyone that the two of them are very close and share almost every detail of their lives with one another. 

After a minute of me sitting while Lando typed rapidly on his phone, he finished whatever he was doing placed his phone face down on the table, then looked over to me. 

"How's it going?" He asked in a quiet voice. 

"It's alright," I replied. "Just happy to have a break before my next semester of school." 

He nodded, but stayed silent. I decided that I needed to say something, but I had no idea what to say. I had no idea what had been going on in his personal life since the beginning of September when we'd gone to Monza together. So, I stuck to something I actually knew about. 

"So, P3 in the Constructors. That's pretty nice." 

He looked over at me and I couldn't exactly read his emotions in his eyes. Usually we were pretty good at reading each other since we had been friends for our whole lives, but I couldn't tell in this moment. I was fairly certain that it was either disappointment or hurt. 

"Don't give me that fake bullshit that people I'm forced to meet for work say. We're not strangers," Lando said. I could tell that he was offended that I chose a topic that was so impersonal to him, but it's not like I had a choice. 

"It's not like I know you that well at the moment," I argued back at him. "We haven't spoken in months and you just expect me to pretend like we're still best friends when every time we argue every time we're together."

"That's not only my fault," he responded. "And we just spoke like 2 weeks ago at Christmas." 

"That doesn't count, Lando. We had a conversation that lasted 5 minutes. The rest of the time you ignored me and we didn't say anything that was genuine when we were in front of your family." 

"Maybe that's true, but we still spoke." 

I was instantly reminded of why I tried my best to make sure that Lando would not be accompanying us on this vacation. I wanted so badly to reconnect with him, but it was so difficult. Especially when I was wishing that we could be more than friends. For a few months there I think we both believed that the two of us were going to get together, but then the incident with Pierre happened and it fizzled out. And every time I think about us, I become disappointed about the fact that the two of us haven't been able to work it out. 

Lando looked as if he was going to say something to me, but there was a voice calling my name from across the pool deck. I turned my head towards the voice, which I had recognized but didn't want to confirm yet. But as I turned my head I saw him walking towards us -- Pierre. The man which had caused the riff between Lando and I. Pierre and I hadn't ever brought up the possibility of us dating, it was strictly a friendship, no matter what Lando thought. 

Pierre walked over to the table, and I stood up when he finally made his way here and gave him a hug. 

"Hey," Pierre said, "I didn't know that you were here!" 

"It was a last minute trip. My friend convinced me to come only a few days ago," I explained to the Frenchman standing in front of me. 

"I see," he looked down at Lando, who was staring at his phone. 

Although it was only when Pierre began explaining the details of his trip to me that I snuck a glance at Lando and saw that he was indeed staring at phone, but it was a blank screen. He was just staring at his phone as if there was something very interesting going on, but it was completely blank. 

"So, I'll be here for the rest of the week, if you want to hang out," Pierre finished. 

"Yeah, I'll have to ask Oli what the plans are for the week, but I'd definitely want to hang out." 

Lando had eventually pushed his phone away and looked up at the two of us standing, which was when Pierre decided to say something to his fellow driver. 

"What's up Lando?" Pierre greeted, putting out his fist, which Lando reluctantly bumped. Pierre looked between the two of us and appeared to have realized something. "Are you guys here together, or..." 

We, of course, weren't here together. Although upon further thought I realized that since Oli and Savannah had left it appeared as though we were having breakfast, together, and on a vacation, together. 

"Sorry to ruin the party, but I think our food is here." 

Lando had completely ignored Pierre's question and settled for quite a rude way to tell my friend -- and his colleague -- that it was time for him to go. Pierre wasn't affected by it, and instead gave us both a very friendly goodbye. 

He hugged me again before saying: "Hope to see you soon, let me know if you have a free day soon!" 

"Will do!" I responded before sitting down. 

"See you mate," Pierre said to Lando. 

Lando replied with, "See you Pierre." 

However, the tone in his voice implied that he wouldn't be in a rush to see the Alpha Tauri driver anytime soon. I doubted that Pierre could detect this tone in his voice, but as someone who had been dealing with Lando for many, many years, I could easily tell. Before I could say anything the waiter came over and left our food with us, the food that Oli had ordered for me being placed in front of me. 

When the waiter left, I said, "Why don't you like Pierre?" 

Lando put his phone down and looked over at me. 

"I like Pierre," He lied. "What makes you think that I don't like Pierre?" 

I furrowed my brows in confusion as I was trying to tell if he was joking with me or not. 

"Cause you're very cold to him. And you basically told him to fuck off when he asked if we were here together." 

"Yeah, because the food was coming," he reasoned. Although I gave him one look to let him know that he couldn't lie to me so easily and he softened and told me a bit of the truth. "And it's none of his business who you're here with. He shouldn't ask those types of questions, you guys aren't that close." 

I smiled, finally glad that he was partially telling the truth. 

"But if Pierre and I aren't close enough, how close do you have to be to ask questions like that?" 

He pondered my question as he took a bite of pineapple. I took a bite of my omelet  while waiting for his response. As I did so I noticed that his hair was curlier than normal. Maybe he was finally embracing the curls, as I had been requesting him to do for years. 

"You have to know each other for a few years," Lando eventually concluded. "You have to really know them." 

I was going to ask him if we were at a place in our friendship to ask these sorts of questions, but Oli and Savannah arrived back to our table.

"Alright, we can go to ride quad bikes at ten, and then this afternoon we can go to this cool beach nearby. The concierge told me about it," Oli told us as he and Sav sat back down at the table. 

"You coming, Lando?" Savannah asked. 

"Yeah, of course," Lando replied. "How could I pass up the opportunity to destroy Oli on some quad bikes?" 

"You're dreaming, mate," his brother replied. 

---

An hour later I was making my way towards the front of the hotel to meet Oli, Sav, and Lando to drive 30 minutes into the desert and ride dune buggies. 

Since we were still going to be going to the beach later in the afternoon, I had only thrown on a black crop top and changed from my slides to a pair of Nike running shoes. (Even though I will not be doing any running.) I opted to wear only the bare minimum of makeup and my usual jewelry. 

Going outside, the rest of the group was standing there waiting to go. There were two McLarens parked out front of the lobby; I could only assume that one of them was for Lando, and he had also managed to snag one for his brother. 

"Sav and I will go in our car, and you and Lando can go in his," Oli said to me. 

I glared at him. I didn't want to ride in a car with someone who I hadn't had a real civil conversation with in months, but I didn't really have any choice. 

Oliver and Savannah climbed into their black sports car, fired it up, and sped out of sight. Which left Lando and I standing there in front of his gold wrapped McLaren. 

a.n. // this is my first post, so let me know what you think!! and if you want part two!

#lando norris #l4ndo #mclaren #ln4 #lando norris imagine #lando norris x reader #lando norris fanfic

[crowniko]

got so inspired by the shinji news today that I wrote an outline for the first 5 chapters of my fanfic. I'm finally doing guys. I'm writing it all out.

*Read for more info about my shinji fic! I have some plot snippets and an overall fanfic description for those interested! :)*

this isn't to say that I haven't written it, since I have SO MUCH PLEASE HOW AM I GOING TO RESHAPE THIS WORK INTO THE FANFIC I ENVISION. I have like 300 pages of content, but it's all over the place and written in 3rd and 1st perspective.

The fanfic I'm writing/drafting is in 2nd, and gender neutral (old one uses she/her, I wrote it before I came out) and this new one has better pacing. I'm really excited to write it all out! I hope that the shinji fans enjoy it, or just bleach fans in general since it's all about the main plot. it's HEAVY reader insert, since I can't help but put myself in everything (don't look at my fomo)

but I also wanted to expand on certain topics in the bleach universe (the soul society in general, life and death, hell, zanpakuto, soul society norms and customs, and more fun stuff!)

also-- idk about y'all but I love ballroom settings and have two flustered and oblivious people dance together, acting as though they aren't totally in love with each other. EYE CONTACT EYE CONTACT. so yeah, can't wait to write the ballroom scene, since I haven't yet, not even in my old drafts.

but if you want to get a glimpse, here's a little bit about the reader and the plot:

the reader is a badass bitch

okay seriously: former squad 8's officer joins squad 5 as their 5th seat! for decades they bond with their loveable captain until unfortunate events lead them and their friends hollowfied :(

they go into the world of the living and have to learn how to deal with new baggage (fun hollow inside yippee). but 20 years before the main plot aizen is like "hahaha peace and love? I don't think so"

I won't say too much, but reader does not have a fun time and shinji sits on a chair all depressed like a character who shares his name.

let's just say, reader gets a fun vacation in hueco Mundo! lots of sights to see! such as the menos forest! or a big kingdom with really nice hollows inside!/s

anyways, lots of stuff I wanted to explore and write about. also, totally made it so that reader asks Ichigo "why are people calling metal bricks apples? how much has changed since I've been kidnapped gone?" totally dad who can't use or understand technology vibes.

so my fic is all of this plus shinji! you might ask, how the hell did u create this absurdly large plot??? and I'm like

pandemic ☺️💅

I'll stop now though, I've already said enough, and I feel a bit deliriously tired after writing all day 😭

#shinji hirako #shinji hirako x reader #shinji #bleach x reader #bleach #bleach tybw #fanfiction #writing #<33333

[kithtaehyung]

So, I started university right before the pandemic hit, and demolished all my (barely existent) plans. I'm already almost 23 and more than halfway through a major I picked kind of on a whim based on what I thought I was good at, and tbh I still hate it. And I have no idea what career it would even lead to. I want to get more into music production or maybe even being an artist or something like that, but it's overwhelming and difficult at the same time... I think I love music, I love listening to it, and growing up I loved the energy of performing in bands and choirs and stuff more than anything, but that doesn't necessarily mean I'm good at it, and I'm not a computer or instrument expert either... I feel so lacking in pretty much all of the various talents/skills... I know practice makes better, but it's so hard to persist when you feel so far behind, and it's hard not to feel discouraged completely when there's always someone newer, younger, and already so much better...

Babe, you are 22. You have.. SO much life ahead of you.

I know that doesn’t seem like anything to go off of right now, but I cannot express enough how excited I am for you because 22 is a wonderful age to start things. You have time to mess up, time to figure things out, time to really try a bunch of shit and get a grasp on what direction you wanna go for.

Don’t let society or other people tell you you’re too old to start something or too late to try something else. Who cares if there are people younger and better than you at something? Who cares if you don’t have a skill set right now? That’s gonna happen. As soon as you recognize that as a fact instead of a barrier for you to overcome, your mindset is gonna shift to “okay, what can i personally do to improve and get better? what do i myself need to do to get where i wanna be?”

Honestly.. this ask feels like something younger me is writing. Because I compared myself to countless people when I was in my early twenties and lmfaoooooo you know what? That dark place of “thinking I wasn’t gonna do great so why try” has only left me with regrets. You have a choice to make and if you really want what you want, go for it and don’t stop.

If I had actually took music production seriously and kept making shitty beats on FL Studio in my dorm room and didn’t give a shit about people telling me it’s not worth it to pursue? Who knows, I could’ve had a studio by now. I could’ve been on the Big Hit production team. I could’ve been working with Metro Boomin or any world-class producers.

Do those goals seem hilarious? Yes. But they also probably could’ve come true if I worked hard enough. But I’ll never know. Because I didn’t keep going when I did. Because I hit that wall of seeing how much I didn’t know about music and production and everything that goes into it, and I got discouraged and dropped it to focus on other things that were safer, more likely to keep me afloat. Don’t be like me if this is something you really do want.

We can do this together, really. Because I’m going for shit now too because that passion itself hasn’t gone away. I am asking people for advice when I need it. I’m networking with musicians and producers and mixing engineers and managers. I’m figuring out what I need to do and where I need to look for educational pieces and putting in the work that I was too discouraged to put in before. All while trying to tell myself it’s okay that I’m where I am at 30. Do this with me. It’s only gonna help you.

Bottom line: if you wanna do something, do it. So what if people are better than you? So what if you don’t have the skills or knowledge right now? Stay disciplined and do the work. Don’t half ass it and don’t think it’s gonna be something you do on the side. Treat it like it’s your life, and practice the hell out of whatever it is. If you end up thinking “this isn’t what I want,” then at least you know for sure and you can pick something else up. But if you keep that passion, hard work and effort will bring you great things.

And you’re gonna look back at this ten years from now and laugh because you’ll realize 22 isn’t far into life at all.

#anon #*advice #apologies if this was so long #i just have a lot to say about this stuff #life doesn’t end at 25 #it really does start at 30 #and this is coming from someone #that was sure they weren’t gonna amount to anything at all #mailbox💌