#this only pushes me more towards changing my name legally

[xqueen-of-disasterx]

Keeping it quiet

Paring: Innocent!reader × dads!friend!Nat

Summery: You looked lonely Natasha could fix that

Warnings: SMUT, (legal) age gap, amab!nat, oral, fingering, p in v, pet names, implied aftercare, secret relationship, breeding kink, unprotected sex, no use of Y/N

Word count: 1.2k

!Disclaimer English is not my first language so please excuse any grammar or spelling errors. This story is completely fictional!

AN: sorry for the long wait but here I am

Masterlist

Today was supposed to be a normal BBQ like your family had had so often in this warm summer months but ever since your father invited his collegue over to join something changed. Ever since you met Natasha Romanoff about 3 months back you couldn't stop thinking about her. She might have been old enough to be your mother and a friend of your father but you couldn't denie the fact that you were attracted to her like flies to the light. She was a true charmer excatly knowing what to say and to do. You never felt uncomfortable around her even though she blatanly flited with you. Her touch somehow always lingering on your skin when the two of you were alone. It was only a matter of time until you ended in Natashas bed legs widely spread as she savoured your taste. So the time flew sneaking around your parents watch as you kept your illicent affair hidden falling head over heals for the older woman. Today was one of those days where Nat came over to your parents place and just couldn't keep her hands of you.

Like always Natashas steps were light on the cold tiles of the french villa your family owned. Sometimes you thought she was an actual spy. You didn't hear her standing in the kitchen in skimpy clothing preparing something for dinner as you mindlessly hummed along whatever Taylor Swift song was currently on the radio. "What are you doing bunny" She sneaked up behind you pressing her front into your back her crotch againt the swell of your ass. "Just doin' a salad you know" She humped checking out the area to see if your parents were around before doing anything further. Her hands came up to your hips pulling your behind harder against her crotch. "Natty please" you whined as she smirked pressing her nose against your neck smelling the expensive perfume she had gotten you. "We can't not here" your breathing was heavy uneven "What if my parents see?"

"They're in the garden trust me bunny" She whispered her strong hands trialling up your sides to your chest. Even though your body was betraying you leaning into her touch seemingly begging for more you couldn't give in just yet. You wanted to show her how you infact could be stronger than your most animalistic thoughts. "Natasha not now" she groaned into her hear making you feel the wettnes betwen your owm legs. "Fuck bunny I can't wait to feel your tight little pussy pulsing around me begging me to let you cum. And then after you had your sweet sweet release I'm gonna breed you're dripping with my cum" she whispered into your ear before pushing herself from the counter leaving into the garden. Of course she wouldn't actually get you pregnant you where on the pill and you weren't sure if she was even fertile. It was more of her kink she had explained to you.

The rest of the night you two kept your play up. Acting asif you couldn't care less what the other was doing in front of your parents. Still you couldn't help but admire her beautiful features as she had some boring converstaion with your father about politics or what ever. What really interested you would be the time spend between the sheets with her as she would show you all her passions and desires. After what seemed like hours you finally snuck your way into the guest room. She was spread wide on the comfortable mattress only wearing a wifebeater and her chequered boxers. "There's my bunny eh" she turned her head towards you as you made your way over to the bed swinging your hips . You sat down deside you before turning to kiss you roughly slipping her tongue into your mouth as you shifted to strangle her waist feeling her growing erection as you rolled your hips against her crotch.

"Fuck Bunny" she breathed out as she gripped onto your hips stilling you in place. "let me get you ready first" she whispered flipping you to lay under her as she kissed your neck down reamoving your cami top in the process. She took on nipple in her mouth slightly sucking on it before her big hand started playing with your other nipple rubbing over it. You let out quiet whippers as she switched sides. After what she deemed to be enough attention to your chest she kissed her way down to your panties nibbling on the skin of your hips. She made sure to leave hickeys in her way. You tried your best go keep it quiet but when Nat did her thing it was hard. Natasha kissed your clit through the soaked through panties pulling them down only to revel your sticky heat.

She made a bold lick from the end of your pussy right up your puffy clit swirling her trained tongue around the erected nub. Her scarlet lips attached to your clit sucking on it making you cry out as you tried to close your legs around her head but she kept them spread. She slowly inserted two of her long fingers into your clenching hole as you quietly cried out for mor and more. Natasha moved her fingers roughly and fast not giving you time to adjust. "Fuck your so tight" she groaned pumping her fingers even faster. “Natty ‘m close so close“ You felt your release close enough to grab but then Nat pulled her dripping fingers from your heat leaving you high and dry. “W-What?” You mumbled out opening your eyes again only to see Natasha smirking down at you “I want some fun too honey“ she smirked flipping you to your knees pushing your hips up as you arched your back showing off both your tight holes to her.

You heard her removing her boxers she already was rock hard for you her reddened tip leaking with pre cum as she expertly spits on her shaft spreading the slick over it. She moved closer pushing her tip to you clit enjoying the sight of you bucking your hips desperately trying to find your pleasure. “Ngh Tasha please” you begged making her listen slowly pushing in making you gasp at the feeling of being stretched out like that. She gave you time to quickly adjust before picking up pace fucking you hard and rough as she had a death grip on your hips. You couldn’t care less about the bruises as you pushed your face into the pillow muffling your sounds. With Natasha whimpers and the sound of skin slapping your moans filled the hot summer night air hoping your parents couldn’t hear you.

You kept clenching down on Nat she grabbed onto your shoulders. “Fuck ‘m gonna breed that little pussy ngh… I’m gonna make you so full of my cum“ you whined out before the coil in your stomach snapped and you came hard Natasha following soon releasing her white seed deep inside your whomp. She proceeded to help you through your orgasm even cleaning you up before cuddling you to sleep her arms tightly around your smaller body.

:)

#natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x reader #black widow x female reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff smut #black widow x reader #natasha x reader #natasha x you #natasha romanoff

[dotster001]

When You Escape Him; Octavinelle

Summary: Yandere Octavinelle boys x gn!reader. He adopts a child that looks like the two of you. You run to give you both a chance at life. You never expected him to find you.

CW: yandere, dark content, murder, threats against reader, drugging, injury to reader, mafia shit, this one feels darker, so read at your own risk, Azul's part is the tamest, so take that as you will

A/N: As promised, I'm going to be doing this one regularly. Hopefully gonna get these out on Sundays.

Heartslaybul Savannahclaw Scarabia Pomefiore Ignihyde Diasomnia Non NRC Staff

Three years into your relationship, he had come home and placed a baby in your arms.

"They were left in a box, all alone. And, well, he looks like if the two of us had a child," he sheepishly stared at the ground. "I just, I just figured it must be a gift from the seven."

You knew what he was trying to do. He was trying to tie himself to you through this boy. He looked just like him, and you were disgusted and scared.

Until he opened his eyes for the first time, and you found yourself staring into your own.

And you knew. You had to give this child the opportunity for a better life. A life without him.

In the end, your son did the opposite of what he had intended. And the first moment you could, the two of you had escaped.

You were lucky. In so many ways. Every single day you were grateful. Grateful that you been at your winter home, which was on land. Grateful that the child he'd found had been human. Grateful that the twins had had to go home early for “family business”.

You would never have had your window otherwise.

And seven years later, you were still grateful. Particularly to the Sunset Savannah, for quietly taking you and your son in as citizens, and legally changing your names, all under the table. 

Your son was starting first grade tomorrow, so you'd spent the day shopping for supplies, eating treats that you'd splurged on to celebrate, chatting about dreams for the future. 

The sun had gone down, and you'd shifted a bag to your hip to unlock the door, only for the door to slowly creak open. You pushed your son behind you, peeking into your darkened apartment. You quickly noticed the absolute wreckage inside, the windows broken, tables flipped, tv smashed, pillows torn; anything that could be broken, was broken.

You turned to your son, pressing a finger to your lips. He looked scared, but nodded. You grabbed his hand, and tip toed towards the stairwell. You made it down one flight of stairs before you saw twin shadows. You had the advantage of seeing them first, so you turned and tiptoed your way to the roof, hastily typing a message to Emergency L. You said a silent prayer as you pushed the door open, immediately hearing cackling as they bounded up the stairs behind you.

If you could just block the door until help arrived…

But the roof was swarmed with large men in black suits. You never stood a chance.

After an uncomfortable ride in a limo with the Leech twins, who were trying really hard to get your son to call them “Uncle”, followed by an underwater breathing potion shoved down your throat (your son's was mixed in a smoothie), and an even more uncomfortable escort back to Azul’s undersea branch of the Monstro Lounge, you found yourself in a very familiar situation. It'd been a while since you'd been in this chair in the VIP room. Last time, you'd traded your life away, believing Azul would find a way home for you. You really should have read the fine print…

“Mister?” Your son tugged on Floyd's sleeve.

Floyd grinned. “That's not my name.”

“U-uncle Floyd?” Floyd nodded happily. “Can I have a glass of water?”

“Daddy will be here in a sec. He'll get you some water.”

Floyd seemed happy to entertain your son, meanwhile Jade quietly snickered from the spot next to you where he was ensuring you stayed seated.

The door slammed open, and you didn't dare turn to look.

“WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?” Azul boomed, and you heard your son release a squeak in fear.

“You were very busy with work. We didn't want to disturb you,” Jade said, the smile clear in his voice.

A tentacle wrapped around your stomach as Azul made his way to his desk.

“I should fire both of you for your impertinence.”

“Ah, but then we'd have to take Shrimpy and baby tako with us,” Floyd guffawed.

“Don't even joke about that,” Azul spat, finally in a place where you couldn't avoid looking at him. He looked exactly the same as you remembered, just with more bags under his eyes. The tentacle wrapped around your middle tightened as he stared at you, then he looked at your son, another tentacle moving to smooth the boy's hair. He flinched, but you'd long since learned that sometimes Azul's tentacles had a mind of their own; they continued petting his head.

“How would you like to stay with your Grandma for a while?” He finally asked.

“Grandma?” 

“Yes. Your parents have to work some things out. So Uncle Floyd and Uncle Jade are going to take you to stay with Grandma.”

“My grandma is from a different world…”

“You have another Grandma,” Azul smiled wickedly. “You see,” the tentacle turned his head to face you, “someone has been lying to you. I'm your father. And they stole you from me, because they are a selfish, mean, person.”

You moved to stand, but the tentacle, and Jade's grip, both became crushing, and you froze in place. Your son's eyes flickered with doubt, but saying something now would give you a black eye and a traumatized son.

“I'm your father,” Azul smiled softly, moving closer and gently taking his hands. That's the smile that made you sign your contract.

“We'll see you soon. And then we'll be a proper family. Okay?”

The boy nodded and was quickly walked out by Jade and Floyd. Azul moved behind his desk, as though he had not a care in the world. He pulled out a familiar piece of glowing paper, and looked at it, before looking at you in mock disapproval.

“It seems you are in extreme violation of your contract, Y/N Ashengrotto.”

The only way you could have ever made it to the surface, was with help. Going to Jade was a long shot. But he'd grinned. It sounded entertaining to him, watching Floyd hunt you down. It would provide a couple hours of fun for him. 

What Jade hadn't anticipated was how long you'd spent preparing for this opportunity. 

And now it had been six years since you'd escaped the clutches of the ocean. Your son was coloring in the living space while you cooked. 

The door splintered into a million pieces with a loud bang. And there he was. His eyes as cold as the day you'd first met him, when you'd watched him fight off a crowd of angry contracted students.

Your son looked up, instantly crying in total fear.  You wrapped your arms around him, shielding him from your angry ex husband. Or at least you tried to. But, just like the man he resembled, he was a tall boy. It was hard to hide your gentle giant. 

“Hey squirt,” Floyd said, his smile not quite reaching his eyes. He leaned in, his face inches from your son's face, scanning him, seeing the traces of himself in the boy. “How bout you come with me?”

“I-” he looked up at you, then back at Floyd. “I don't wanna.”

Floyd's eyes narrowed. He stood back up, grabbing you by the jaw, with a growl.

“Bet ya think you're real funny, doncha Shrimpy? Turning my family against me? Ya did it with Jade too. Thing is,” he scowled, biting his lip before continuing, “if I kill the kid, I know I'll never get you back again.”

Your breath caught in your throat. 

“Jade,” you breathed, but Floyd threw you to the ground.

“Don't you dare say his name!” He screamed, moving to grab you again, but your son stood in his way.

“You don't get to talk about him! You killed my brother!” He screamed, trying to bob and weave around the boy. Finally he pulled out his pen, whispering a spell, and your son collapsed.

“No!” You screamed, crawling over to him, but Floyd blasted you back against the wall.

“He's fine. Just sleeping til we get home,” he said, irritation at having to even explain it clear in his voice.

He stalked over to you, and you tried to scoot back, but winced. You were pretty sure you had broken something.

He shoved you back, then hovered over your body, pinning your hands above your head. He nuzzled into your neck, his teeth grazing your jugular.

“If I ripped your throat out, you couldn't leave me again.”

“Please don't,” you breathed out, tears trickling from the corners of your eyes.

“No promises,” he said, the smile returning to his voice. “We'll see how well you behave.”

You'd found a spy among the ranks of Jade's men. As much as you believed that Jade probably already knew, you'd used the poor soul’s situation to your advantage. You wouldn't tell “Papa Leech” about him, if he got his boss to get you and your son an escape. You pointed out how if you escaped, and stayed hidden, Jade would essentially be out of the picture, forever weakening the Leech family.

It took lots of negotiation, and some 4d chess on your part to out maneuver the near genius that was Jade, but eventually, you were set up in a small home in the sea just off the coast of  the kingdom of heroes. 

They'd even started prepping for when your son was old enough to start safely taking human transformation potions. A moray eel mer stood out no matter where he lived, so the sooner they could set you up on land, the better. 

That spy had left that job, and was now your regular contact when they were passing along information. You were scheduled to meet him today. He'd told you to bring your son. You hoped this meant you were finally going to discuss leaving the ocean. You'd dressed up your boy, putting a wig on him to hide the very Leech-ish hair he was unfortunate enough to be sporting. A pair of sunglasses on both of you, and you were ready. 

You arrived at the fancy restaurant, giving the host the fake name that you used for your contact. He directed you to a room in the back, telling you to lock the door behind you.

You opened the door in the back, gently ushering your son in as you turned to lock the door. You turned back, and smiled at your contact, sitting down next to your son, in the seat across from him. 

Then your contact fell out of his chair.

“Aw, too bad,” you heard an upsettingly familiar voice say from the dark corner of the room.

You grabbed your son's arm, preparing to swim away, but it took less than a beat for Jade to torpedo through the water, and grab you, throwing you over his shoulder. 

“No!” Your son cried, banging his fists against Jade.

Jade snickered, before calling out, “Floyd. Enough hiding. Time to play with your beloved nephew.”

Floyd swam out from under the table, sighing heavily. 

“If I have to. Just make sure you actually get Shrimpy on the right path this time, or Pops is gonna lose it.”

Your son was snatched around the middle, then dragged out of the room, your anguished cries doing nothing. Jade swam back to the seat your now dead contact was sitting in, slamming you down into it, binding you with a spell. 

“Hello, my love. How was your vacation?” He asked with a close eyed smile.

You struggled against the binds, and he sighed in mock disappointment.

“Oh dear, I thought you'd be happy to see me.”

He wiped away an invisible tear. Then he reached over to the plate on the table. 

“Jade, please. Where are you taking my son?” You pleaded.

He raised a brow, his face the very image of innocence, as he rolled his fork in the pasta on the plate.

“You mean, my son?” He asked. “He's going somewhere safe.”

“Jade, promise me you won't hurt him-”

“I would never! Do you think I'm a cruel beast?”

You didn't feel safe answering that question.

“While you were gone, I did some thinking. I was asking a lot of you. You're just a weak magicless human in a very scary environment. On top of that, I wanted you to be a parent, and a perfect spouse. You need some help.”

He grinned. “So I did some experimenting. Open wide!” He pressed the fork to your mouth, but you kept your lips sealed tight. “Don't worry, my pearl, you won't feel a thing.”

You had no doubt of that. Whatever was in that food wouldn't hurt you, not in a way you would feel. But whatever it did do would be far worse. You just knew it, especially after all this time he had to think about  just how to make you behave.

“Do you ever wish to see your son again?”

You slowly nodded, your throat closing up.

“Do you want your son's grandfather to be put in charge of your discipline?”

You shook your head, and Jade's smile widened as he pressed the fork back to your lips. This time, you slowly opened your mouth and took a bite of the pasta. It tasted good, at least. That was your last thought as the world around you morphed and warped, the only thing you could truly focus on was a sharp toothed smile.

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #azul ashengrotto #yandere azul ashengrotto #yandere azul ashengrotto x reader #floyd leech x reader #floyd leech #yandere floyd leech #yandere floyd leech x reader #yandere #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere twisted wonderland x reader #yandere jade leech #yandere jade leech x reader #jade leech #jade leech x reader

[lethalchiralium]

hello!! I don't think you've done this, but forgive me if you have.

I'm thinking about the moment when Winnie first started calling Missus "mum" and how emotional a moment that must have been for missus. Winnie probably just said it non chalantly because she was so little and obviously saw Missus as her mother, but it had to be such a big deal for Missus 🥲😭🩷

And if Simon overheard--- them talking about it? ahhhhh it makes my heart soar.

anyways sorry for such a long ask. 🩷

-🧀

EEE. i love this. i didn’t add them talking about it because they have before 😌🫶

happiness canon under the cut 🤍

It was normal for his daughter to call her nanny ‘Mama’, no matter how much he quietly discouraged it. From when she could speak, she called you ‘Mama’. Not as a form of endearment, but it’s what she named you. Mama.

You spent forever - when you were simply her nanny - to get her to quit the habit. Trying to push off the idea of the word to a picture of her real mother, a smiling photo of the brunette Winnie resembled. She’d give you a grumble and a pout, resorting to wiggling to escape your hold. She never used it maliciously, it was just a word she said when she needed something.

But now that she was older and you were legally her mom, she only seemed to call you Mama. Simon tried to instill in his daughter that you were more than just mama; you were mummy, mum, mommy, mom. So when Simon came home from the extended mission and met Mellie, he didn’t expect anything to have changed with Winnie. She’s as stubborn as her mother, and as much as him.

Mellie was nursing a bottle in his arms, his gaze entirely engulfed by his baby. How her hands slowly moved on her sides, clenching and unclenching her fists as she kept her eyes closed. His chest was warm, the smirk on his face was painful - he adored Mellie and he had only met her a few days prior. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for her and her older sister.

The nursery was dimly lit by a lamp, the night life of Manchester ignored by the Lieutenant as he watched his two month old baby. Barely any noise came from outside, but he could hear something moving in his home. He raised his head up, intently listening.

Little footsteps, a door creaking open and a little voice, he could barely hear what his daughter said. He rose to his feet, still cradling the baby and holding her bottle, before he silently walked towards the hallway. He could hear the hesitance in Winnie’s footsteps; he poked his head out, about to whisper for her if it wasn’t for your silhouette peering out of your bedroom, kneeling as soon as you saw your daughter.

Winnie held out her hand, physically deflating as she spoke, “Mummy.”

Simon’s eyes widened, surprised she called you her mum - something he thought he wouldn’t experience for a few more years. You were always ‘Mama’. Always.

I missed so much.

“What’s goin’ on, baby?” Your voice was warm, it was like sweet chamomile tea on a cool day - soothing to your daughter. Your hand reached up to her temple, petting down some stray hairs while you kept her eye contact. “Another nightmare?”

A minute nod and Winnie was scooped into your arms, you turned around to disappear into the bedroom where he longed to be for just a moment. Just to hear Winnie call you mummy so quietly, a sound above a whisper. He wanted to kiss her face and tell her she was such a wonderful girl, kiss your lips and tell you that you were raising his children perfectly. He took a step forwards but there was a grunt from his chest, he looked down to see the stare that was identical to his own - Mellie’s eyebrows furrowed as she wiggled, still sucking on her bottle. He mumbled a soft, “Sorry, love. Let’s get back to the chair, yeah?”

[join my taglist here!] taglist:

@idkwtftitbh

@blingblong55

@local-spidey

@sanfransolomitatm

@frazie99

@Awilan

@cosmoscoffeee

@khadeejarh

@tutuwusworld

@cxltblood

@oaktree-of-the-nine-worlds

@babygirl-riley

@emi-flaces

@marini03

@jeannieboys

@egdeverauxx

@koshehehe

Copyright © 2023 lethalchiralium. All rights reserved.

#happiness series #happiness #lethalchiralium #lethal chiralium #simon ghost riley #simon riley #call of duty #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost riley x f!reader #simon ghost riley x wife!reader #simon riley x wife!reader

[dee-the-red-witch]

The Monthly Roundup

Okay, normally, this is just a free monthly post over on my Patreon, but I figured I should push this out into the wild as well, because this kind of stuff's always needed. Want this, and a bunch of weekly readings from a cursed tarot deck, media reviews, and other content including fiction and the occasional build post? Maybe consider adding me over there as well. Anyways, like I said, it's a monthly roundup- in this case a bigass collection of links and resources for folks interested in pursuing gender transition one way or another. And while a bunch of it is transfem specific and sometimes medical transition specific, because it's stuff I dug up while hunting down things for myself, there's also things in there good for anyone of any gender, and resources for legal/social transition as well. And this is long enough to deserve a cut for once, so...

Hey! What If *I'M* trans?

The Gender Dysphoria Bible- https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en Wondering if you're experiencing Gender Dysphoria? This may be a good place to start. Realize the GDB is slanted largely towards transfem folks, so it doesn't necessarily apply evenly to everyone, but it does cover a lot of ground that folks may identify with.

Trans Medical Resources

DIY HRT- https://diyhrt.cafe/index.php/Main_Page (for legal reasons, I'm going to tell you to at least try to see a licensed physician or endocrinologist before starting to DIY your own hormones, but keep in mind, I'm not your responsible adult, and if you don't choose to listen, that's on you) This is the main, best hub for sourcing and getting info on doing your own hormone therapy. Keep in mind, it's once again slanted towards feminizing methods, because testosterone is still a controlled substance in most of the world (which is bloody fucking stupid, but that's a rant for another time).

GALAP- The Gender Affirming Letter Access Project- https://thegalap.org/ While we may have new WPATH guidelines with the Soc 8 updates that dropped a little bit ago, most providers and insurers are still on outdated requirements that insist on letters from mental health providers for transgender-related care. Which can affect access to surgeries, HRT, and more. GALAP exists to connect folks with providers who'll give those letters,m in some cases free of charge even.

Gynecologist List- https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1Djia_WkrVO3S4jKn6odNwQk7pOcpcL4x00FMNekrb7Q/htmlview This one's more for uterus-owners in general and less trans-specific, but giventhe number of folks with uteri who'd can end up with a hard time finding a willing doctor for some procedures, it's important for everyone. This is a Google database of hundreds of gynecologists, listed by location, willing to perform sterilization procedures with informed consent, without secondary authorization from anyone else. The list is patient-vetted, so your mileage may vary, but for those seeking sterilization and/or hysterectomies as part of their transition it may prove to be invaluable as a resource, because doctors willing to do this work can be few and rare in some areas.

Transfeminine Science- https://transfemscience.org/ Articles, journals and all sorts of researching into, well, just what the name says, transfeminizing science. A lot of medical professionals simply don't have knowledge in the field and are acting on what they learned in med school, which may be way out of date. If they're willing to listen, there's stuff in there to help bring them up to speed. Better yet, it;'s also a great resource to educate yourself so you can advocate for your own care a bit better.

Other Transition resources (legal, social, etc)

NCTE's ID GUIDE- https://transequality.org/documents The National Transgender Center for Equality's guide to changing your legal identity, in a handy format that lets you break it down by state or territory, or even federal documents (United States only, sorry.) and links to the right paperwork to use. Rainbow Passage- https://rainbowpassage.org/ It sucks that we need organizations like this in these times, but I'm glad to see there's people already stepping up to the task. Rainbow Passage is an organization dedicated to helping trans youth get out of trans-hostile states and relocate to safer areas. And if you can, volunteering for them is a great way to help improve safety for trans folk in general.

Seattle Voice Lab- https://www.seattlevoicelab.com/ if you've seen me on social media much lately, then you've seen me talking about this place. This is who I'm (through February and March at least) taking voice lessons through to feminize my own voice more. They also have a bunch of online resources, a discord server, and other help if you need to figure your own vocal chords out a bit better.

Strands For Trans- https://strandsfortrans.org/ Need a haircut, or color or other beauty services you're using for the first time ever as an out trans person and you're not sure where's going to be safe to go? Strands For Trans is the first comprehensive database of Aesthetics businesses for hair and everything, AND THEY VET THE BUSINESSES, to ensure your safety and comfort.

TLC's Life-Planning Guide- http://transgenderlawcenter.org/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/TLC_Life-Planning-Documents-Transgender.pdf The Transgender Law Center put this guide together specifically for planning end-of-life details. Yes, it's a depressing and tragic thing, but protecting and making sure our identities are still properly preserved after we die is still just as an important part of what we're fighting as anything else is. This guide will help you with establishing a Living Will, controlling hospital visits, and setting up proper Powers of Attorney, so that nothing potentially falls back into the hands of people who might refuse to recognize who you truly are. (In many states, you can designate someone other than your next of kin to take charge of your body when you die (next of kin is defined by law, not by preference). If you need to do that, go to nolo.com and look up article on "[your state] funeral law" to get a rundown on if and how to do this.

Trans Media

The Digital Transgender Archive- https://www.digitaltransgenderarchive.net "The purpose of the Digital Transgender Archive (DTA) is to increase the accessibility of transgender history by providing an online hub for digitized historical materials, born-digital materials, and information on archival holdings throughout the world." (In short, this is one of several free libraries of trans history.)

Totally Trans- https://www.patreon.com/totallytrans/posts Hey, look at that, it's another Patreon! Except, no, wait, it's a podcast! Totally Trans looks at media both historical and modern with a transgendered lens. Sometimes it's silly fun, other times, it's great insights into queer and trans history, and all around it's a great show to add on whatever service you're already getting podcasts through- or you can hit the link above to help support them at the same time for early access.

Trans News, Blogs, and Notes

Erin In The Morning: https://www.erininthemorning.com/ Erin's newsletter runs almost daily these days, mostly with updates regarding trans legislation all around the US. It's a good way to stay up to date, but it can also be a drag these days, largely because it's practically just a constantly expanding list of bad news thanks to the GOP right now.

Stained Glass Woman: https://stainedglasswoman.substack.com/ aka Doc Impossible/Zoe. I first discovered her work and writing when WPATH released their new SOC 8 guidelines, because she was one of the few people that could make the thing actually make sense in non-legalese. But I subscribed andkeep following here for regular updates both because she presents a trans coming out narrative that was just a joy to read, and also covers interesting  news in the field of trans medicine from time to time. Definitely worth adding to your feed.

A Self Defense Study Guide for Trans Women and Gender Non-Conforming / Nonbinary AMAB Folks: https://www.silversprocket.net/2021/09/13/a-self-defense-study-guide-for-trans-women-and-gender-non-conforming-nonbinary-amab-folks/

This is, quite honestly, one of the best self-defense guides I've seen for gender-nonconforming folks (and one of the few, to be honest), short of private defense instruction. AND it's available to read in full for free at that link, or in print for just a 5$ donation. Go check it out.

Other general roundups

Grassroots GAC Resources- https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/19kSzBLo_hjpiBjHN8tvK73sVHU25NKWjMau2vNl8uuM/edit#gid=778305468 Google spreadsheet of links in general, from therapy help and hrt assistance, to all sorts of other info, some of which are repeats from here, but there's also a bunch of others I haven't had time or opportunity to vet yet.

#trans #transgender resources #link roundup #readmore #transgender

[dampsleeves]

life update :3 (a little vent-y)

sooo, been over 200 days since the house caught fire and we had to move. obviously, a lot of stuff's been happening. can't go into deep details for fear of someone I don't want to find this, finding this, but I'll say this much: FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've very rarely mentioned family on here (for obvious reasons - this account is NOT made for that lol) but here goes. tw for pretty heavy topics: mentions of abuse, father issues, health issues, transphobia & financial issues. I turned 18 Feb 21st, literally just almost 2 months before the damn house caught fire. Meanwhile, my brother's still a minor. MEANING, I narrowly escaped the custody battle my mom & dad are in. But unfortunately, he's still stuck in the middle of it. :( My pops was not really the nicest person to me when I was a kid -

whooping my ass whenever I did anything wrong, no matter how minor the offense was.

Telling me that he loved God more than he loved me, because "You're God's gift to me. God is the one who gave you to me in the first place," when I was four.

Telling me that if I didn't start being ok with receiving physical affection from family - which he knew made me uncomfortable - I was "going to grow up to be a S3R1AL K1LL3R" (yes he said that.)

Telling me that "God doesn't make mistakes," and that he "made me into a beautiful young woman for a reason" after I came out to him personally at 14 - big mistake 0/10 stars, would never do again. You get the idea. And those are the tame examples I could think of. So, I finally cut him off. As soon as my mom, brother, & I were in our new place, I blocked his number and haven't talked to him since. I was sick of him not respecting my boundaries, and repeatedly demonstrating that he thought of me as nothing more than a possession. Tired of him making me feel crazy all the time too. But now he's fucking with my mom & brother. Intentionally not paying child support till the last minute possible - & then making it in as small of payments at a time as he possibly can (yes he can afford it btw.) Trying to force my brother to go over to his place, even when my brother does NOT want to - which has begun giving my brother psychological issues & issues with school, mirroring the ones I used to struggle with bc of that bastard. My mom is juggling all sorts of things, & I really at least wanna try to help financially by getting a job, but I can't yet because: she says that I'm only 18, & shouldn't have to get a job to help out (I disagree.) I don't have an ID bc she wants me to wait on my legal name change - which costs a pretty decent chunk of change - reason is bc she "wants me to have as easy an early adulthood life as possible" (love her.) AND, I haven't actually graduated - No, I dipped in 11th bc school was hell (not exaggerating,) & instead just decided to pursue a GED, that I haven't been able to work towards bc of the shit show that is life in midwestern america. So I've been very depressed, exhausted, & hopeless. The least I can do is clean up our house while she's at work, & get this - some days I don't even have the physical energy to do THAT! I do not know what the hell is wrong with my body currently, but it absolutely sucks. & I'm really tired of just taking up space all the time. She's dealing with health issues too, & I'm always worried ab her. Idk what the hell to do, but something's gotta give. Everybody needs a fucking break. I keep trying to shoo away all the dark thoughts, push myself as often as possible, & keep my fingers crossed, but jfc... Sorry just needed to yell into the void for a sec. I'll live, I'm sure - I've survived worse. Sometimes things just suck. But I like to think that someday they won't. :,)

#spiidervent #not snz #venting :3 #feel free to ignore this if you dont wanna hear me bitch and moan

[adri-2022]

Suspension

Fandom: Chicago PD

Characters: Jay Halstead x FemReader / OC William Halstead

Warnings: Swearing / mention of bullying

Word count: 1482

Jay Halstead Materlist

A/N: Hey my beautiful people, here is another original imagine. I hope everyone is doing good. William Halstead being portrayed by Walker Scobell. Also I took some inspiration from the movie The Adam Project. Sending love 💕

Don’t be afraid to leave your comment!

———————

Running could be heard through the hallways of a middle school in Chicago. Where a 12 year old boy ran from his bully. Getting to the stairs of the school he was cornered by the other kid, and pushed to the wall.

“You ain’t going to say anything, you hear me! Uh, I’m gonna enjoy this” the bully said, chuckling.

“Who talks like that. Did you order like a bully started kit on Amazon or something. Do you even hear yourself ?” Liam responded but he was met with a punch in the face and gut. This was a daily occurrence for Liam, well for -William Halstead-. But of course he was a very selfless kid and hated to worry his parents.

You were at your office when you were interrupted by a call from school saying that apparently Liam was getting suspended. You were told that he started a fight, but you knew better, you were his mother after all. You had been noticing the changes in his behavior, how he would shut down when you asked about school or when your husband mention him to bring his friends around. William didn’t have any friends, apparently being the offspring of parents in the legal system drew only bad things to him.

He may think you didn’t notice the bruises and the dried blood on his shirt when he came from school, but you did. Every time you tried to approach the situation you would be met by a wall, a wall so high you doubted a helicopter could get through, but this right here was the last straw. You were about to rip some heads off.

Putting your SUV in park and starting to claim out of it you were stopped when another car parked near you. From it stepped out your husband pissed look on his face and you were pretty sure it matched yours. Eyes locking with you, making him started walking towards you. You knew things would go south, it would’ve been one thing to call momma bear, but the greatest mistake was to call your former ranger, overprotective, detective husband.

“C’mon I’m tired of this shit” he said intertwining your hands and power walking towards the school office, your heels clicking with every step. As you entered the principals office you saw your son sitting on a chair, he immediately looked down knowing he couldn’t hide it anymore. To the other side of the room there was another couple with another kid.

“Mr and Mrs-” the principal started being interrupted by you trowing your purse in the available chair, before turning your sons chin to look at his face. It was clear momma bear Y/N was about to wreck this place. When you saw the bruising you looked at Jay squinting your eyes, eyebrow raised. You had been married for a long time now to master the visual communication between you two, so with that look he knew what you had thought, so you proceeded to sit in the chair to Liam’s right.

“Mr and Mrs Halstead. Thank you for coming in such short notice” the principal started giving you a small smile, which wasn’t returned.

“Real question is. Why?” you asked crossing your arms, an intimidating look on your face. You knew that the principal was nervous, and you were sure he was even more scared of the gun strapped to your husbands waist. Of course Jay wouldn’t use it- not now at least.

“I agree. We wouldn’t have need to come here at all. What in gods name is happening here?” Jay started putting his hands on the back of Liam’s chair, glaring at the parents of the kid who very clearly had punched Liam. How would you know? Well, given that the only kid with a bruise was Liam and the knuckles on the other kids hand were swollen.

“Chris was about to explain the circumstances. Go ahead” the principal said gesturing to the other kid in the room, but you refused to look his way not believing for a second what he could say.

“I don’t know what happened. I was just walking and he started hitting me from out of nowhere…” the other kid started talking, before Liam scoffed,

“Fucking liar” this made you look at Liam, then at Jay.

“Language” the other mother said. That didn’t sit well with Jay.

“Hey…” Jay started, but was interrupted by your chuckles.

“Do not speak to my kid. Lady” you said pointing a finger at her with a smirk, you were praying she would say something else so you could smack her.

“Liam what were you saying before being rudely interrupted” Jay said looking at your son

“That he is lying, what happe…” Liam started just to be interrupted once more by the good for nothing principal.

“Liam is not your turn to speak” the principal commented.

“Oh I didn’t know you chose death today! Really. Is that what you have been telling him every time he comes here looking for help? Huh? Is it!” you snapped at him, his eyes going wide at your outburst.

“Now we know where he gets it from” the other mother said, making you laugh humorless shaking your head.

“Liam will get a week suspension…”

“Whoa whoa. A week suspension? For what defending himself” this was Jay’s turn to snap, making you nod.

“Is not defense if he started it” the other mother commented, which made you stand up abruptly. Liam and Jay’s hands coming out to stop you from advancing.

“I swear to god Karen if you don’t shut your mouth. You’re gonna eat my fist” her mouth dropped,

“My name is not Karen” “Well you look like one so sip it!”

“This is not resolving anything” the principal once again tried to interject on the subject, to be met with more arguing.

“Are you kidding me!” you exclaimed, still on your feet before being cut off by your husband. Then proceeding to sit beside Liam to try to calm yourself.

“YOU are the one not solving shit in here. Our son has been suffering from bullying at the hands of this kid. And you’re not doing anything about it” Jay screamed making Liam flinch at the tone he was using, you put a hand on his knee.

“And now you want to punish him for doing the only thing a kid can do when there is no support system in this god forsaken school” you continued fuming.

“They’re kids. It’s not bullying. It’s just pretend” the other father in the room spoke for the first time, even though he should’ve staid quiet.

“What the fuck” you said looking up at the ceiling.

“Alright whatever you say Frodo” Jay started,

“Then we’re going to pretend that he is NOT a detective and I’m NOT a lawyer. How is that for your peanut mind?” you continued, before being interrupted.

“Mom, just forget about it. It’s not worth it. He never does anything. They never listen.” Liam interrupted before standing up, grabbing his bag and leaving the room.

“Liam!” you called after him, Jay put a hand out to tell you he would go with him. Minutes later the other kid was sent out by the principal. With that you turned back to the adults in the room, shaking your head.

“We’re not going to be coming back to this school. And Mr and Mrs Frodo. Look into your mailboxes on Monday, you’ll have a lawsuit with my name on it. You too, Mr Donkey. Trust me! I’m one hell of a lawyer!” with that you walked out of the room, heels clicking as you walked the hallways and out into the parking lot.

Reaching the parking lot you were confused at the sight in front of you. Jay was leaning on his truck arms crossed while smirking, following his eyesight you asked.

“What in the hell is going on there?” you asked almost afraid of the answer. Jay looked to you before putting his arm around your shoulders, kissing the side of you head.

“Just wait…” then a gasp escaped your mouth, you putting a hand over it eyes wide. While a chuckle escaped Jay’s.

“I didn’t fight you back because I was scared of you. I did it because I didn’t want to break your jaw dumbass” Liam said to the bully as the latter laid on the ground clutching his face in pain. Because unknown to the other kid William had received a tiny bit of defense training from his former ranger father. Then turning around to meet his parents eyes,

“Sorry mom. Had to make my suspension valid” Liam said shrugging his shoulders and smirking, -just like his dad- you thought.

“We have to dip!” Jay shouted at Liam in between laughs, while you sighed

“You guys are gonna kill me”

#jay halstead x reader #chicago pd imagines #jay halstead #jay halstead fluff #jay halstead x y/n #jay halstead x you #fan fiction #one chicago fic #jay halstead angst #jay halstead x son

[timelesstoclafane]

A Changing Shoe Sizes Tale

(This is not mine, it was a story I loved back in the day and I just found a version of it but couldn’t share it, so I copy/pasted it)

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DEAR MIKE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!” My friends sang to me as I blew out my candles on my birthday cake. I immediately went to go open my presents while my parents cut the cake and started handing out pieces to everyone.

I unwrapped a rectangular shaped box and to my surprise I got the special branded SUPRA shoes that they only made probably a handful of them. What makes these shoes so special, is there is no actual size on these babies, but they have a special dial along the side that makes the shoe shrink and grow, as well as whoever wears them. The catch is though is the shoe registers itself to the user who wore them last, so try not to let anyone mess with them as long as you were the last wearer.

I immediately slipped the things on and turned them up one shoe size, going from an 11 to a 12, and immediately felt myself grow a good two inches and swell in size a bit. “Thanks Mom and Dad! You guys are the best!”

“No Problem, Sweetie. Now why don’t you go up stairs and put them away for now.

After I put my shoes away I really needed to go use the restroom. As I made my way there, my friend Andrew was coming out from using it himself. “Damn, Mikey, I would love to have a pair of those shoes!” I hated being called Mikey, and I haven’t been called that since my growth spurt at 14. Now 21 and legal, people better call me Mike!

“Maybe you can try the shoes out sometime Andrew,” He also hated being called by his name as well. He liked to be called Andy, and because he stopped growing at 14 as well and was stuck at 5′2″ in size 5s, I had to give him a hard time with it.

“Yeah that would be cool,” he said.

I couldn’t hold it in any longer as I pushed my way past him and entered the restroom. I whipped my cock out and began to take a long, hard piss into the bowl.

Moments later a dizzy spell hit me and i grabbed onto the wall for support. “What the fuck?!” I steadied myself as my hand began to slide down the wall and my body slowly began to compact inward on itself. The bowl beginning to look closer and closer as my body slowly began to shrink smaller and smaller.

I stopped pissing and ran up the stairs, tripping over my shrinking feet and legs. “Why is this happening?! my voice changing a pitch as I try to pull myself up the stairs to my bedroom. I know someone must be messing with the shoes, it was the only way I could be shrinking and so fast. As I finally reached the top of the stairs I was a good 5′6″ 140 lbs… By the time I reached my door handle I was easily 5′4″ 120… And by the time the door was open, I gazed at my friend, Andrew, wearing my Supras…. now size 5′s… and I looked dead on at him, we were eye to eye.

“Dude, how could you do this to me?!” I was hurt.

“You said I could try them, thought now was a good time,” he just gave me a smirk.

“Take them off now!” I walked towards him and as I got closer, my shorts got caught around my ankles and I tripped, I landed right between his legs, my hands on each side of his body. What I didn’t realize though until it was too late is one hand hit the dial on the shoe, and brought it to as far as it could go… Size 18s…”

“Oh Fuck!” I watched his feet push outward as they grew to the size of my forearms. His calves becoming thicker by the second, I tried to grab on to them and steady myself as they grew more denser by the second.

Next thing I saw was his thighs and ass as they filled out his shorts, his cock growing in them too as it slid down and stuck tight to the material. His entire body growing proportionately to his now massive feet size. His legs grew longer like trees planted in the ground and my eyes had to travel upward as I saw his shirt becoming tighter and tighter by the second.

Not only was the shirt becoming tighter, it literally bunched themselves up onto his expanding pecs and biceps, exposing a washboard hard 8 pack and a perfect V taper leading down to his prized growing meat in his uncomfortably tight shorts.

Soon I wasn’t even able to see his face as his pecs had grown so immense, and in my position, completely overshadowed anything above them. I began to hear some tearing sounds from his clothing as the shorts began to explode off of him, his semi hard phallus appeared monstrous to me. Next came the shirt and with a quick flex, tore right down the back and up the arm sleeves.

In one last moan, my nightmare came true… the sound of tearing cloth and leather as his feet began to tear through the Supras, “NO!!!!” I shouted, watching his toes push through the front ends. I guess there was only so much material a growing pair of shoes can actually contain in them.

Andrew slowly bent down, his cock brushing over my body, until he was once again eye to eye with me. “Happy Birthday, Mikey…”

Changing Shoe Sizes - The Locker Room

(Again, not mine, but a sequel that I wanted to share)

“Come on man, let me try on your shoes!” I asked Chad. The lucky bastard won one of the new prototype’s from Adidas new shows that can change the wearers size of their feet with a quick turn of a knob on the shoe. The original model was by Supra, but people went a bit to far in terms of seeing how big they could grow, causing the shoes to literally burst off of peoples feet. Some guy decided to sue them and made a huge profit, even though getting a chance to get one out of a hundred pairs of them that were invented and being a now 8 foot god shouldn’t have been payment enough.

“No way Arthur! These are my Adidas. You can get a pair when they launch in a few months.” He practically laughed under his breath. He knows I can’t afford a pair of those shoes, they are already retailing for pre-order for $2500. I watched as he twisted the knob, growing to a nice 6′8″ before getting dressed in his workout clothes to go hit the basketball court. He took off his shoes and put on an impressive pair of size 15 Nike’s on before leaving the locker room, tossing his Adidas in his locker and slamming it shut. “Catch you on the court dude, he walked off and left me alone to get dressed.

I sighed to myself, Pulling off my shirt, shorts, and boxers. I gave a tug on my 6 inch cock before pulling my jock strap out of my gym back and slipping it on. I readjusted my package before picking up my shorts that I had dropped on the floor to put back on.

To my surprise, I noticed the locker that Chad was using never actually closed all the way. It has been a while since he has been gone. I made a quick look around the room before pulling the door open and grabbing the shoes. “Fuck yes…” I whispered to myself, bringing the shoes up to my nose and taking a whiff from the inside of them. He must have not broke them in yet, they still smell new…

I myself wasn’t really a small guy. I stood about 5′6″ and weighed around 180lbs… But I needed to be bigger.

My hands shaking, cock throbbing in my jock, I placed my hand on the knob and turned it till it was at a size 8… I watched in amazement as the shoes shrank and then heard a Wallop of noise from outside, as I heard the noise of shoes screeching against the polished basketball court. It’s all true… He must of just shrunk, maybe doing a layup… or trying to dribble… he probably just fell on his ass and made a full out of himself.

I quickly pulled the shoes on my feet. I know at any moment, Chad would be coming through those doors, wondering what just happened. I stood up, bent down, and twisted the damn things till it hit Size 18…

“Oh FUCK!” I moaned as a wave of pleasure hit me, my body firing up a few inches. My muscles expanding to keep up in proportion. Then another wave fired through my body. My jock filling up more and more as it grew to epic sizes in the thin material used to just keep my junk in place as I worked out. Another… And another….

I watched the doors swing open, and in walks Chad. Still bent over, feeling the euphoric bliss wash over me as I hit 7′6″ and over 350lbs of muscle.

“Those are my shoes!” He had to hold up his clothes as he ran towards me. “Take them off!” I watched as he tripped, falling over his gym shorts and much larger shoes that he still tried to wear back into the locker room. He fell face first right between my legs as I watched his hand make contact with the knob, and send it flying towards 25…

I grinned, feeling the power begin to wash over me again… My cock already stuffed to the max in this tiny g-string of a jock… I hope it explodes with this next wave…

[yourtoradorasextendedwarranty]

If people aren't mad at pride products, then how do you explain the Kid Rock Bud Light situation? That wasn't even in June!

If people aren't mad that LGBT+ people exist, then explain the 2016 Orlando Nightclub Shooting! That was obviously a hatecrime!

Just because you feel the way you do doesn't negate the actual harm put on LGBT+.

You don't have to bend the knee to us, just don't pretend like this isn't happening constantly!

1. I never said there was not hate towards LGBT people. Not once. They're still very much is. But hate towards all groups does and will always exist no matter how small

2. The Bud light situation is complicated. Dylan M. Isn't trans. He's an amalgamation of trans trended, attention seeker, clout chaser, and narcissist. Created by TikTok no less. And he's frankly a mockery of LGBT people as a whole. As Bud Light is a beer that caters to conservatives yes, they got boycott. Not because Dylan's "trans" but because like my post stated normies are extremely tired of having it all shoved in their face. Dylan was an extreme case to those people because there is an actual movent of trans activists (not all of whom are trans) pushing people mindlessly into transitioning. With no barriers. No mental health help, just strait to CSH and surgeries. Add to that people being told they are not allowed to criticize it and yes you anger people.

3. So the shooting was interesting for 2 reasons. The first being this:

Which we know good well that Muslims hate gay people..... Correction. Must middle eastern Muslims hate gay people. Secondly, there was talk at the possibility he was deep closeted gay. And considering his religious background that makes sense. things from the article actually possibly lend credence to this. The first being that he was weirdly narcissistic. As in work out all the time and admire yourself in the mirror a lot. But something else his wife brought up was that he often got excessively angry at his name. Because to him the name sounded gay. Does that prove that man way gay? No. But combining those two things feels a lot like a homophobic gay man who can't come to terms with who he is. Much like the frat boy jock types you see whom get exceedingly angry over being called gay but have a tendency to do things that are in fact kinda gay. A lot of the time that level of anger is from internalized homophobia. Can I confirm that theory? No. It's it possible though? Yes.

4. Lastly, you might not be asking people to bow to you. But a large number of LGBT people are demanding others bow down and worship them. My post never said this was all our even most LGBT people. Just a very extreme and vocal minority who demand compliance and glorifying. I can't count the number of listicles, articles, posts etc, I see of "If you are straight, you support sexual violence" or, "Cis people are boring and why it's not ok to be cis" and TikToks of youths saying, "I'm sorry but if you're not LGBTQIA2+ you can be friends with me or my friends. Straight is overrated and needs to end because it's stupid straight people are bad and climate change is killing us. #NoMoreBabies." < This being one of the worst because kids are desperate to have the attention of their peers. And more desperate to fit in. If you tell them being trans or otherwise it's the only option they'll be trans. Because they are FAR too young to understand WHAT THAT MEANS.

Again. I don't think this stuff is all anti-lgbt hate. I think a lot of it is normies tired of having it pushed in their face. And again. You might not be the one doing it. But there are LGBT people on my post who agree that it's happening. So it's not an observation unique to me.

And this may piss you off, but LGBT people have been in a position of power and privilege for a number of years now. To a point many are legally and socially beyond criticism and consequence. And what was that saying neo progressives like so much? When you've been in a position of privilege, equality feels like oppression"? Hate will always exist. Always. Some will see it much more than others. But as a whole, the fact it's gotten to the point LGBT people can do sex acts in front of kids without reproach is proof enough of what I've said.

In closing, I'm not, not have I said, that LGBT people don't have hate geared towards them. Certainly they do. But in the West, LGBT are safer than in almost any other country. But media is going to media and politics are going to politic. If something can be perceived as a hate crime, certain political parties will run with it, and their allies in media will make sure it's global news. We have 300+ Mil People here. That considered, the amount of actual hate crimes are small. Which while still a bad thing, that number can not and never will be zero.

[ecologyenthusiast]

Working with wildlife

I think the emotional drainage in the field of wildlife is often overlooked and hard to understand. People who aren't in the field look at me and say "wow, you have the coolest job ever!" They see me working in the field, tracking animals, handling animals, exploring, and having fun. What they don't see is the pressure I put on my body carrying heavy gear and hiking extreme terrain. The long hours and anger I project toward myself for making a mistake. Animals' lives are potentially at stake and that is the greatest emotional toll I've ever felt.

Right now is especially hard. I'm working full time learning the ropes of a new job. I'm also wrapping up a bachelor's degree that took me 7 years to finally finish. I have another internship working on camera traps that I'm also wrapping up. On top of all this, I'm coordinating graduation for all my friends and family to come celebrate with me. I decided that wasn't enough and even became the student commencement speaker for my ceremony. Frankly, it's a lot. What's hardest is that most people don't understand the work we do. They think we're cruel for tagging animals, even though it gives us vital information to save them from extinction by humans. They think we're snowflakes for calling out what is legally defined as animal harassment. They think we're elitist or gatekeeping for telling people to not touch or feed wildlife. We may have more people rooting for us than booing us, but the booers sure are loud.

I love my job. I've worked so hard for 7 years to get to this place, and my journey is only just beginning. What I didn't anticipate was the isolation I would feel once I was here. Don't get me wrong, I have such a supportive crew of leaders guiding me through my work, encouraging me and reminding me that I'm doing well. But, it makes it hard going home and realizing that my view of reality has changed. I'm surrounded by the pain of the natural world. I'm exposed on a daily basis to the birth of new life as well as death--and the cycle and balance of both. I see the land from beyond the hiking trails and have learned the names of the plants I push through. Most people just don't have this sense of place, and it makes me sad that many people either don't have the means to or don't care to experience it.

My hope with this blog is that I can connect to more people who share my experiences. To connect with people who seek to understand the natural world we exist in and have experienced deep loneliness in that curiosity. If you resonated with any of this, please know that I see you.

#animals #wildlife conservation #wildlife biology #wildlife #women in stem #women in conservation #field biology #land back #ecology #working with wildlife #working with animals

[an-android-in-a-tutu]

Why did we retire preferred pronouns and such?

There is still some use to them

I'm sure there is and I'm hardly like. A voice for the community but I remember a couple years back there was a push to drop the "preferred" in terms of name/pronouns because it makes it sound like it's optional. Like well I'd rather you call me Jason but obviously deadnaming me is fine too! I don't think it's wrong to refer to your name as your preferred name, especially to distinguish it from your legal name if they're different and you're going to be encountering your deadname more often. It's totally normal for people to have a nickname or preferred name cis or trans so like, telling people "actually I prefer to be called this" is obviously like a simple understandable way to get the point across.

(Actually deadname is another shift that I remember happening! Again because of the like, relative authority that something like "Birth Name" or "Legal Name" has over "Preferred name".)

I do think it's better to tell people these are "my pronouns" rather than "my preferred pronouns" if you genuinely only want to be called one thing. If you're someone who goes by multiple sets of pronouns, or like prefers to be referred to by they/them but being misgendered isn't a source of distress for you, then of course you would use whatever language fits your feelings! For you it might just be a preference, everyone's experience with gender and feelings about pronouns are gonna be different and the point shouldn't be to police other trans' peoples language.

However, cis people do tend to treat trans folks gender identities as. Like. Preference. Optional. "She likes to use they/them pronouns" "Oh he prefers to be called Sarah these days" and for a while, at least to my memory, the language that most trans people used reflected that, even for those of us who really only have one set of pronouns we ever want anyone to use, and one name we want everyone to refer to us by. So there was a push to drop the "preferred" take our space and simply tell people what we wanted to be called without hedging.

To my hazy memory anyway. I'm not a historian and this is something I vaguely remember being a talking point when I was in high school, that I recalled and thought was funny considering the language of "my pronouns" instead of "preferred pronouns" has caught on to the point that now transphobes sound completely incoherent. Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if the shift largely happened because it's one less word to say so you save time.

Anyway my point is I wasn't trying to be prescriptive, I have personally noticed a shift away from "preferred pronouns" and towards just "pronouns" I'm not telling anyone they have to change the language they use to describe themself if they don't want to.

TL;DR if you have a preferred name and preferred pronouns, go ahead and call them that! But if you have only one thing you want to be called and only one set of pronouns you want to be referred to by, and that's important to you, why beat around the bush? That's your name and those are your pronouns, no qualifiers necessary.

#trans stuff #I'm not an expert I'm just a guy who's been trans for a while now #six years since I've been a dude and like twelve since I knew I wasn't a girl #but most of my contact with community has been over the internet and my memory's shit so I'm not a source on anything

[stray-kaz]

Snow & Ice : a Bucky Barnes x OC FF : Six

Lucie woke to the unmistakable sensation of sun falling across her face and she wrinkled her nose and rolled over to get away from it. Her hand landed on something that crinkled under her fingers.

She forced her eyes open and stared blearily at the sheet of paper. On top of it was a smaller note with hastily scrawled words upon it. Her heart plummeted as she realised that she was alone in the bedroom and there were no sounds coming from the rest of the apartment. She looked around hastily, her eyes landing on the wall mounted clock Bucky had purchased several years back. The thin black hands showed her the time at ten o’clock. Her hand came up to cover her mouth; he was long gone by now. She turned back to the paper and lifted the note, trying to stop the shaking in her wrist.

Doll,

I know you’ll be upset I didn’t wake you to say goodbye, but you looked too peaceful sleeping. England awaits me. I’ll call as soon as I can, as soon as they’ll let me. Look after Steve for me. Keep him out of trouble. Under this note you will find a legal document. This legal document names you as the new owner of the apartment you slept in last night. Forgive me, I stole your signature. I didn’t think you would mind, and after all, it’s better to ask forgiveness than permission, right? This way, you don’t have to go back to that cold house where your father lives, except to pick up your clothes and books. My place is yours now, doll. I left my heart behind with you on that pillow.

I love you, Lucie.

Eternally,

your Bucky

With trembling hand, Lucie put the note back down and turned to the document that had lain beneath it. She picked it up and studied it, tears brimming her eyes. She looked up when she had finished reading it and gazed about the little bedroom. It was all hers. He had given it to her. She had only one more stop, and then she would never have to go home again. She drew her knees up, the paper pressing and rustling against her chest, and pressed her hands to her chest. She curled in on herself as her heart drummed out a staccato beat of pain.

Later that day, still in her same red dress and black coat, she walked home, Bucky’s keys jingling in her pocket. She hit the front door at a fast trot and pushed past her father who was waiting on the other side. He grabbed her arm, but she yanked it out of his grasp and whirled to face him, sorrow hardening her resolve.

“Don’t touch me” she said fiercely.

He stepped back, surprised by her tone.

“Where the hell have you been?” he demanded, recovering quickly. “You’re wearing the same clothes you were in when you went out last night!”

Lucie nodded.

“That’s right” she said. “I was with Bucky. I went home with him last night after we went dancing.”

She watched with strange satisfaction, feeling somewhat distant, as his face turned an impressive shade of red she had not seen before. It changed to almost purple before he spoke again.

“Did you sleep with him?”

His voice was borderline loud, and quaking as it hit the air. She moved closer to him and waited a long time before responding, just to watch him squirm.

“No.”

She smiled quickly.

“But he did give me his apartment. So I’ve just come home to collect my things and then I’m not coming back here ever again.”

She turned her back and walked away from him, elation buoying her all the way to her room. She packed methodically, stowing her belongings into a single suitcase and an army duffle Bucky had nicked for her. She slung it over her shoulder and walked back down the hall, her head up. She looked her father dead in the eye as she passed him.

“Goodbye, Dad” she said smoothly. “Have a pleasant life.”

She imagined she could hear the echo of Bucky’s laughter in her head, and smiled slightly to herself as she pulled her battered suitcase towards the front door, over the threshold and down the old steps. A sense of accomplishment filled her when she yanked it onto the other side of the garden gate and listened to the smooth sound of the now, thanks to Bucky, well oiled hinges swinging it shut.

Lucie turned to face the brownstone that had been home to her for twenty one years and then thought of the little apartment that would be home to her for the time to come. She prayed that it would one day be home to Bucky again also. She didn’t want to live alone in it forever, and she knew as well as she knew her own name that she would never love another man the same as she loved him.

She took a deep breath in, squared her shoulders and faced her freedom.

A few weeks later, she had just come home from another day at work and was preparing a meal for herself, when a thunderous knocking landed on the door. She jumped and turned in its direction, wide eyed. She glanced along the bench, gaze landing on the wooden knife block, and reached slowly for one of the biggest knives, gripping the hilt tightly in her right hand. Then –

“Lucie!”

Her shoulders and the rest of her body relaxed when she realised it wasn’t her father’s voice. He had never known where Bucky lived, but she wouldn’t put it past him to find out. Instead, the voice sounded like Steve’s, only a little deeper.

“Steve?” she called out.

“Yes, it’s me! Let me in?”

“How did you know where I was?” she asked as she walked to the door.

“I went to your father’s and he told me that Buck gave you his place.”

His voice was still a little muffled through the door, but when she opened it, her mouth fell open and she gaped at him, unabashed. He was almost a foot taller than the last time she saw him and the plain t-shirt he wore strained over the muscles in his arms.

“Um” she said. “What happened?”

Steve glanced down at himself and then up at her face again. They had always been a similar height; now he was at least as tall as Bucky, possibly taller.

“Science experiment” he muttered, and eased past her into the apartment. “And, Luce, put down the knife.”

She looked down in surprise to see she was still holding it. She returned to the narrow kitchen and put it back, point down.

“Science experiment gone wrong, or right?” she asked, folding her arms over the front of her dress.

Steve snorted lightly and raised an eyebrow at her.

“What does it look like?”

“You tell me. Steven, if this was done to you so you could get a girlfriend -”

He cut her off quickly.

“It wasn’t, I promise you” he said. “I volunteered for it.”

Her eyebrows shot up.

“Why?”

“They’re going to let me join the war effort.”

“Steve…”

Her tone was warning and he shook his head at her.

“What would Bucky say?”

“Bucky’s not here” he mumbled, but he didn’t look her in the eye. “And anyway, I want to do what Bucky’s doing, Lucie. I want to fight.”

“To kill Germans?” she queried, eyeing him closely.

He shook his head again.

“No.”

“Then why?”

“To stop bullies.”

Lucie sighed and reached up to run a hand through her hair. Steve glanced suddenly around the room, taking note of the dinner prep and the cutlery laid out on the table.

“Were you about to eat?” he blurted out, though it was blatantly obvious. “I’m so sorry, I’ll leave you to it.”

Lucie held up her hand.

“Hold it” she instructed, and he halted on his way to the door, looking back at her. “Would you like to stay and eat with me? It’s not fun eating alone, I’ve realised.”

She offered a weak smile and Steve nodded.

“Okay, sure” he agreed.

He walked back to her and pulled open a drawer to retrieve a second set of cutlery for himself.

“I’m sure Bucky wouldn’t want his two best friends to be lonely, and I’ve got some time before I leave.”

Lucie’s head jerked up from where she had been concentrating on the pasta.

“Leave to where?”

He looked over at her.

“Oh, did I not mention that?” he replied, looking a little sheepish.

Lucie shook her head, her eyes narrowed on his face.

“No…” she murmured, waiting.

“I’m going wherever they need me” he said in a low voice. “England, Germany, France, wherever, really. I might even get to see Bucky.”

He gave her a small smile, but she glanced away, using her fall of hair to hide her face from him as she stirred the pot on the tiny stove.

“Okay, Steve” she mumbled. “If you see him, say hi to him for me. Tell him – No, don’t tell him. He already knows.”

Steve cocked his head to one side as he leaned on his palms on the opposite side of the bench to where she stood. His expression was curious.

“Did something happen between you two that night after Stark’s exhibition?” he asked her. “Did he take you dancing?”

Lucie nodded.

“Yes” she said quietly.

“Did he… kiss you?”

“Yes.”

Steve sucked in a quick, uncertain breath.

“Did you two…” he trailed off, gesturing between himself and her.

Lucie’s cheeks flamed bright red as she shook her head adamantly.

“No” she said firmly. “We didn’t.”

She didn’t mention that she had fallen asleep, and that was why they hadn’t; she doubted Steve needed, or wanted, to know that. She remembered thinking later, after she’d woken up the morning after the exhibition, that Bucky could have woken her to continue but he hadn’t, content to just hold her until he had to go. But she wished with all her might that he had woken her up to kiss her goodbye.

“Did you…want to?”

Her eyes shot up to his again and colour quickly infused his cheeks.

“Sorry, sorry” he muttered hurriedly. “It’s none of my business.”

She looked away again as she went to the sink and drained the water out of the pot before separating the pasta onto two plates and adding the Bolognese sauce to the top. She filled two tall glasses with water from the tap and carried everything to the table, turning down Steve’s offer to help her.

They ate in companionable silence, the only sounds those of knives and forks scraping against the plates. Until Steve had had enough and he needed to speak up.

“He loves you, you know” he said quietly.

Lucie glanced up at him with a faint smile.

“I know” she murmured. “He wrote it on his note that he left for me. I’ve known he loved for me years, I just didn’t know it was like that.”

Steve nodded.

“You mean, how it was for you. What you felt for him” he added.

Lucie nodded slowly back at him.

“Yes” she agreed. “I could never tell for sure. I just thought he loved me like a little sister.”

Steve shrugged his newly broad shoulders.

“Maybe it was like that for a while, but it changed” he told her. “Around the time you turned eighteen and he took you to your prom. He was a little confused for a while.”

Her mouth fell open again and she stared at him across the table from her.

“Why didn’t he say anything?” she demanded. “He had that whole night! He had three years to say something!”

“And he did” Steve replied, smiling a little wryly. “Three weeks ago.”

Lucie rolled her eyes and scoffed.

“Eleventh hour, if you ask me” she muttered.

Steve smiled fondly at her.

“He was worried he was too old for you, Luce” he explained quietly. “Four years is a pretty big deal. He confessed to me after the prom that he wanted to punch the daylights out of your boyfriend. He also told me that the kid looked a lot like him.”

Lucie flushed and lowered her gaze to her hands in her lap below the table.

“Well” she mumbled. “I’ve loved Bucky for longer than he’s loved me. Joseph Muller just happened to have dark hair and blue eyes, that’s all. I couldn’t have Bucky, so I -”

“So you found the next best thing” Steve finished for her, nodding slowly along with her words. “Okay.”

Lucie bit her lip, then looked up at him again.

“He loved me then?” she asked softly, hope colouring her voice.

Steve nodded his head.

“He loved you then” he confirmed.

She covered her face with her hands and he got up at once to come round to her side of the table and kneel down next to her, reminding her painfully of Bucky doing that years ago after her father had hit her. He tugged gently on her and she slid to the floor to join him on her knees, both her arms winding around his shoulders. Her chin fell onto his shoulder, jutting onto the hard muscle. She sucked air in through her mouth and squeezed her eyes tightly closed. She turned her head slightly so that she could speak directly in Steve’s ear.

“I miss him” she murmured desperately, clutching at his t-shirt.

He nodded and hugged her tighter, his arms forming steel bands across her back. They stayed like that on the carpet for some time, holding onto one another and not mentioning the missing link, until it was time for Steve to get up and leave her. She felt hollowed out and empty as she walked him to the door and held it open with one hand as he stood in the outside hall, turning to look down at her. It felt to her as if the world were falling apart, bit by bit, and taking the best people in her life far away from her. She felt suddenly sick, her stomach roiling.

“Bye, Steve” she said softly.

He bent down to her and hugged her one more time, his arms wrapped gently around her back. Words stirred her hair as he spoke.

“He’ll come back” he said solemnly. “You know he never leaves you behind.”

Lucie let go and stepped back a bit to look up at him, a tired smile gracing her mouth.

“There’s a first time for everything” she said. “Good luck. Watch out for Nazis.”

Steve gave her an informal salute and she blew him a kiss before he turned his back on her and she shut the door, leaning her back against it. Seconds later, her knees gave out and she slid to the floor, hiding her face in her folded arms. She shook all over as the tears came in a great flood to drown all the world in her sorrow.

#bucky barnes #wwii bucky #bucky barnes x oc #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes ff #bucky barnes fan fiction #liss writes #1940s bucky #snow & ice

[supposedlyadminblog]

Tag Game To Better Know You! Send this to people you’d like to know better!

Tagged by @samrut

What book are you currently reading?

I haven't read any actual novels in quite some time. Though I have a lot of ongoing manga reads that I keep up with. Mostly isekai titles. ^.^;

What’s your favorite movie you saw in theaters this year?

Oof, what was the last film I saw in theaters? I think it was Sonic 2? We did watch Bad Guys last month but on streaming service. 6.6;

What do you usually wear?

Large t-shirts and black pants.... actually, majority of the clothing I wear, is black these days. =w=; For years it’d just be t-shirts and jeans. ( TTwTT I miss wearing jeans)

How tall are you?

I’m about 5 ft 6 in

What’s your Star Sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event? 

Sagittarius. The day A Christmas Carol was published and Chris Angel.

According to my best friend I'm exactly one week older than Andy Black from Black Veil Brides.

Do you go by your name or a nick-name?

Normally, I go by my middle name. First name was actually an after thought as mom wanted us to all have the same first and last initial.

I have a few nicknames, none given by me, but all varies by who uses it.

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child?

Yes and no. "I want to be an artist, just like mom!" "I'm gonna make lot of pictures to put in museums and be a teacher..." To quote mini me.

I still love art and creating things. Right now I simply don't know what to do with myself.

Are you in a relationship? If not, who is your crush if you have one?

Sure am, we’ve been together this long, we pretty much are married. Just too lazy to go through the trouble of making it legal... plus I don’t want to change my name

What’s something you’re good at vs. something you’re bad at?

untangling chains, knots. when provided enough time, I can find it relaxing.

suck at communicating apparently...

Dogs or cats?

I like both, though I lean more towards to dogs.

If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favorite picture/favorite line/favorite etc. from something you created this year?

Sadly, I haven’t created much at all this year. Not since last December/January...

The only thing(s) I’ve worked on at all, was things for my DnD character sheet and oc character, Pumpkin.

What’s something you would like to create content for?

lot of things tbh... I would like to wrap up Bounty Hunter’s blog up to everything being resolved of the internal conflicts. And finish off Oscar’s father’s day event.

too many unfinished projects.

What’s something you’re currently obsessed with? 

nothing that’s caught my hyperfocus atm. Although Survivor II has been stuck in my head for a week now.

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this year?

to be truthful, myself...

What’s a hidden talent of yours?

seems I’m good at finding ‘points’ on objects. always cutting my hands at work.

Are you religious?

I am actually. Never liked the whole ‘pushing’ religion onto people though. Only reason I don’t go to a church hardly is because I’m always brought up for my mom, and most of the people that’s made the experience worth worshiping with, have passed on.

What’s something you wish to have at this moment?

wish I could be in better spirits. I can feel myself becoming more and more distant from people spiritually, and it’s concerning. I try to make light of things, yet I’m more brushed off than before... I hit a depression point over the weekend, which is partly why this has taken me awhile to respond. I just wish things to be better than they are now.

yall don’t have to continue this, tagging @vodkanburgers​ @fireyhotsupertalia​

#tagged

[sewingpatchworkquilts]

Entry the First

It is the first week of July, and Pride month is over. 

I’ve debated with myself, talked myself in to and out of writing, posting, talking about this at various different times. 

I considered talking about it on March 31st, Transgender Day of Visibility, as it came towards the last couple weeks of the Lent season in the Roman Catholic Church, and being a staunch Catholic myself I spend much time in Lent considering aspects of my identity and their relation to my faith. It is a constant process of consideration, growth, and reconsideration.  

I considered talking about it at the start of Pride month, obviously. What better time to than when your whole community is banding together? And then the stories started coming out about pride events being targeted by white supremacist groups and other violent, armed men; and I heard people in my community being told to our faces that others “Cannot wait until it’s legal to hunt you.” 

I considered talking about it on June 24th, because following all of that what better time is there to talk about and bring attention to that than in tandem with my thoughts on the Most Sacred Heart, something we recognize as representing the boundless love and compassion of God? I find personally that the two concepts are inseparable. And while I respect that at the time I had reasons for not doing so and not feeling like I could, I regret not speaking then. 

I’ve considered waiting longer. November 13-19th is Transgender Awareness Week, and maybe it’d be easier if I only commit to talking about it for that one week? Additionally, hopefully, there’d be changes that those who see me frequently offline would notice and I’d have to talk about at some point either way. Or even just waiting until November 20th, Transgender Day of Remembrance, which is a day of prayer, vigil and honoring the lives, memories and tragedies of the whole, unbroken people that our community has lost in acts of crude, unnecessary violence.

And instead I have chosen to talk about it now, because I am tired of being limited to talking about the experiences I have and am exposed to that are bad, miserable, terrifying, or otherwise harmful to myself and others. One cannot survive on misery alone, and it’s incredibly difficult to share Queer Joy in short forms especially with people who are not themselves LGBTQ+ or exposed to certain parts of the community. But community love and care in joy and misery is vitally important, and that community isn’t built on silence. My goal with this is to bring more balance to the attention that joy and misery get in our experiences. Nobody should feel like they have to go through life as if they are a walking tragedy. 

So it is on that note that I would like to say that my name is Genesius, Gene for short, and I use ne/nem pronouns. I am transgender nonbinary, and particularly use the word Agender to describe myself. Agender, broadly, means that I consider myself to be genderless, though that means and feels like different things to different people. I do not consider being transgender or nonbinary to be at odds with the ideas, traditions and teachings of Catholicism even if the official of stance of the Church is that I am indeed at odds with them. I’ve taken it to God Themself more times than I care to count or admit to and I have received nothing but reassurance, unconditional acceptance and love - something often lacking in those claiming to be Their followers. I will not now or ever push that onto other people by any means, I am exclusively talking about and applying this experience to myself as mine is the only one I can speak to. It is my hope that with sharing this journey and experience of mine, there can be more acceptance, a better understanding of what acceptance truly means in this context, and greater community protection for myself and others in my life. I want to share the things that do bring joy as a queer person, I want to document something other than the pain we’re so often limited to, Thank you for your time. 💛

#catholic #catholiscism #nonbinary #agender #queer #queer pride #dear diary #pride #transgender #lgbtq #queer joy #neopronouns

[artooine]

petition for hunter to change his name to something else because thats my name 😤

#please #help me #i would like to find man w knife sexy but i cannot imagine relationships with him because it takes me out of it #and i dont want to read someone moaning my name 😭😭😭😭 #this only pushes me more towards changing my name legally #tbb #the bad batch

[fireofjudgement]

A helping hand (Part 2)

Previous chapter

Fandom: Alice in Borderland

Pairing: Niragi x f!reader

Summary: Left with no other choice you decide to make a deal with the devil himself.

Word count: 2.7k

Warnings: swearing, mentions of death, blood and murder, this one contains sexual content, minors do not interact this is strictly 18+; dub con, choking, hair pulling, name calling, oral sex (m receiving).

A/N: Here it is! My first (poorly written) semi smutty fic. This is my first time writing an oral sex scene so you legally cannot be mean, I know it's bad <3 Also I changed the concept of this chapter like 5 times and yes, there's going to be a third one and oh boy..You're in for a ride.

Tagging: @niragis-right-hand-rabbit @kinkyniragi @yunnnnnnie

Let me know if you want to join the taglist for the next chapter!

--

You didn't have a choice. Refusing his help meant death. Quick and painless, but death nonetheless. An abrupt end to a story too short to make you want to finish it just yet. You wanted to survive, you wanted to live and wrap it up with a well deserved happy ever after. Even living with the consequences of your decision would be better than death. Right? After witnessing all the horrors in and outside of game arenas, after having to fight for every single chapter of your story, there wasn't much he could do for you to regret choosing life over death. Right?

And yet somehow you couldn't help but feel defeated, even after the cheerful music erupts from your phone. The game is cleared. You survived. But what now? You weren't dumb, you knew damn well he's not going to just let you go. Let you forget that he saved your life, risking his own in the process. It didn't matter just how many other lives were lost because of him and his men. To him it was just another game, a game he's always won. And a winner deserves their prize, right? It's only fair.

You looked up at the man walking next to you, he was clearly in no rush to exit the arena. Trying not to stare for too long to not anger him or make him change his mind about saving you, you took in his features. Someone with his looks could either break your neck or your bed frame and while you still weren't sure how you'd feel about the latter, you'd much prefer it over the former. It didn't matter that he saved you barely a few minutes earlier. Nothing mattered anymore. Men like him were ticking time bombs. One wrong move, bang.. Your story would end right then and there. You might have cleared the actual game but now you entered a new, much more dangerous one, the rules of which you didn't know. Yet.

"The name's Niragi", he introduced himself without looking at you. Fuck, you knew you shouldn't have been staring. "You should cheer up, aren't you happy I saved your ass?"

There we go. You knew he was going to bring it up but you didn't expect it to happen right away. "That depends.." your words came out as a whisper, your voice shaking. After everything that happened tonight and what you witnessed during your first game you really weren't sure what to expect from him and the uncertainty was driving you insane.

Wrong answer. Before you could say anything else, Niragi stopped in his tracks, turning towards you with a visibly annoyed expression. "On what?" 

It was hard to focus, with his face so close to yours, his dark eyes filled with anger and something else you couldn't quite place, his smell invading your nostrils. A mixture of fear and need replaced the feeling of uncertainty and hopelessness, despite your efforts to remember what happened that first night. He's an enemy for fuck's sake, you cursed yourself in your thoughts, a literal embodiment of everything you despise. 

You knew he was waiting for an answer and you desperately tried to come up with something but while your mind and your body were fighting a battle that your mind was bound to  lose, words seemed to escape you, making him more and more annoyed with each second. It wasn't long before he was pushing you against the nearest wall, pretty much removing the distance between the two of you. 

"Depends on what? If I knew you were such an ungrateful little bitch, I would have left you there and watched you die!" 

You wanted to survive. You wanted to live. You really did. But not like this. You already lost your freedom once, having to participate in the games, and now this wannabe knight in shining armor was trying to guilt trip you into..what exactly? You weren't sure what his motives were and you couldn't care less. You didn't feel hopeless anymore. Or scared. You were pissed. Little by little you set your bottled up anger free and allow it to consume you. Weeks, months of stress, fear of death and loneliness, all led to this exact moment. You knew what you were about to do could get you killed but enough was enough. You finally snapped.

"Then why didn't you? Why save me out of all people, huh? Did I fucking ask you for help?" You spat in his face, tears already threatening to fall from your eyes. All of this was so fucking unfair. He had no right to treat you like this, no matter who the fuck he thought he was. You didn't ask for this, you didn't ask for his help. All you were trying to do was survive. "How stupid do you have to be to believe I'll be thankful after seeing you murder innocent people for fun? I know you didn't help me because you're such a good person so tell me what you want from me and fuck off!"

You expected everything at that moment. You expected him to slap you. Or to shoot you with his rifle right then and there. But you didn't expect him to laugh in your face, like you just told the best joke he's ever heard. He laughed and laughed, until he couldn't catch his breath. You just stood there, body still pressed against the wall, with Niragi standing way too close to you. Well, at least you were still alive. "What's so fucking funny, huh?" 

"You know," he finally spoke, letting go of you and backing up a little. "when I saw you for the first time..was it a few weeks ago? Months? Eh, who the fuck cares. When I saw you then I thought you were weak. That you wouldn't survive a week in this shithole. And look at you now, you little bitch proved me wrong."

So he did see you that first night. But..that didn't make any sense. "Why didn't you kill me then? You killed everyone else, why not me?" 

"I told you," he shrugged, "you looked like you were about to shit your pants, I thought you'll die before you even get to play again. It was much more fun to see you run away in panic." 

It made sense. As much sense as possible in this wicked world anyway. But there was one more thing bothering you. "So.. why did you save me just now? What exactly is it that you want from me?" You didn't like the way he was looking at you, a cocky grin on his face. 

"Well..I wasn't planning on having this conversation but since you were so honest with me just now, I'll tell you." You averted your gaze, suddenly embarrassed by your outburst. Maybe you overreacted, maybe he wasn't actually going to hurt you. "I was surprised to see you again. See you alive. And yet even after winning so many games you still looked so weak, so..pitiful. Laying on the ground like a fucking loser. You didn't deserve a quick death. I wanted to kill you myself. Slowly. Painfully. I wanted to hear you beg for your pathetic life." Oh. 

"But don't worry," he added, probably noticing your shocked expression. "I've changed my mind. You're much more fun than I expected.." You gasped when he suddenly got closer again, grabbing your chin with one hand, forcing you to look at him. His next words made you squeeze your thighs together. "Now I want to see what else that filthy mouth of yours can do."

Before you had the chance to say anything, he let go of your chin only to lower his hand and curl it around your throat. He then leaned in even closer, you felt his hot breath tickling your face. "How about a little deal, hmm?" he asked in a low tone. "You show me how thankful you are for saving you and I'll keep you alive..for now at least."

Your mind went completely blank. Between his hand still on your neck, his body pressed against yours and his voice so close to your ear, you started to forget everything that occurred that night. The whole world was becoming a blur and nothing mattered anymore except for him. His body, his voice, his smell. It's been so long since you've been intimate with anyone and it's never been this exciting, this..dangerous. If only you could forget who he was and what he's done. It's simple, right? You just have to..No.

"Why..why would I do that?" You stuttered, struggling to speak. "What's the point..if I don't even know if you won't kill me..afterwards." You didn't know where all this courage came from. Or maybe it was pure stupidity? Your plan was risky, you knew it. But you were not about to live as his slave, unsure when and how he's going to kill you. You didn't want to let your attraction for him blind you. If you're about to do this, it's going to be on your own terms, or not at all. You'd rather die than live such a sad excuse of a life. 

He didn't say anything at first, not moving a single inch either. He stayed still, processing your words. Ever since he arrived in the Borderland nobody has dared to talk back to him like this, nobody refused his will. He was struggling to keep his composure, patience wasn't a virtue of his afterall. But you turned him on just as much as you pissed him off, if not more, so he was willing to play your game. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he started to slowly pull away from you, freeing you from his tight grip. His eyes stayed glued to yours, as if he was trying to read your mind, figure out what your fucking deal was. He was desperately trying not to show that you took him by surprise. This was not the outcome he expected after saving you. "What do you want then?"

That was a great question. What did you want? Obviously you had to stay realistic, you knew asking too much of him could quickly escalate the already fragile situation. You also knew there was no way you could prevent him from using you but..at this point you weren't even sure who wanted it more, you or him. "I want..I want you to keep me safe during games," you finally spoke, trying to sound as calm and confident as possible, "and..I'll let you do whatever you want to me afterwards." 

"Whatever I want?" he asked, his previously serious expression slowly being replaced by a smirk. You noticed his grip on his rifle tighten, making you gulp nervously. 

"Yes. As long as it involves me being..you know, alive." You put emphasis on the last word, wanting to make sure he understood. You've done everything you could, the ball was in his court now.

"And if I say yes.." he finally spoke after what felt like hours. Before he finished the sentence, he slowly rested his free hand on your hip, his body even closer to yours than before. "how will I know that you'll keep your end of the deal?"

A shadow of a smirk appeared on your face. This was your time to shine. You knew that what you'll do next will either make or break your deal so you decided to give him a taste of what you can do. And if you were being completely honest, you just wanted him to fuck you already. You did everything in your power to stay alive, if he decides to kill you nevertheless he can at least rearrange your organs beforehand. 

"Try not to fall in love, asshole!" was the last thing you said before lightly pushing him away to get some space and getting on your knees. You didn't give him time to think, much less act, swiftly unzipping his pants and pulling them down with newfound energy. If you had any doubts about how much your unexpected arrogance turned him on, they all disappeared now, when you saw the bulge in his boxers, causing wetness to pool between your legs. Eager to finally taste him and make sure he remembers you for a long time you let his underwear join his pants on the ground and..Fuck. Why do the ones with the ugliest personalities always have the prettiest cocks? 

Something must have shown on your face because you suddenly felt his hand on your head, fingers curling into your hair.

"See something you like?" You heard the smirk in his voice before you even looked up.

You rolled your eyes. "I've seen bigger."

"Oh is that so? I didn't expect you to be such a slut. And a bratty one at that. Well, then I guess you won't have a problem taking it all.." 

You didn't have a chance to respond when his grip on your hair tightened significantly, a surprised gasp escaping your mouth. He didn't waste any time, using the chance to thrust into your open mouth, moaning at the contact. He didn't let go even when you gagged around him, struggling to keep up with the pace he set. 

But you weren't going to just let him use you as he pleased. You wanted him to remember you, crave you, come back for more over and over again. Trying to breathe through your nose, you forced yourself to relax, allowing you to take in more and more of his length with each thrust, one of your hands rising to work what your mouth couldn't take. 

It wasn't long till his grip on your hair softened, a string of slurred curses above you a hint that your plan was working. You finally gained the courage to look up, the sight you were greeted with sending shivers straight to your aching cunt. His eyes dark with lust, fixated on your body, biting his lip hard enough to draw blood and..you couldn't help but smile around him at how desperately he was holding onto his rifle even at that moment. 

Without breaking eye contact you continued to suck him off, working magic both with your tongue and your fingers. You couldn't help but moan, the salty taste of his soft skin, the noises he was making, the fire in your core growing bigger with each second..it was driving you insane. Not only was his dick pretty, it fit perfectly in your mouth too. Swallowing around him you couldn't help but wonder if it would fit just as perfectly in your other holes.

"Fuck..you're so filthy.." his voice, raspy and lower than you've ever heard before, brought you back to reality. "If..if you keep going like this you'll have yourself a deal." 

His words filled you with even more energy. One hand still wrapped around his cock, now slick with your saliva, you started massaging his balls with the other, immediately gaining his approval in the form of loud moans and quiet praises.

It wasn't long before you felt him tremble, his fingers tugging at your hair again. You knew he was close so you sped up your pace, trying to take as much of him as you could. Still looking him in the eyes, despite the tears running down your face, you swallowed around him one last time before he came with a guttural moan. You didn't waste a single drop, swallowing everything he gave you, only pulling away when he came down from his high.

You stayed down afterwards, patiently waiting for him to make his next move. Beaming with pride you started to imagine what he'll do to you. Will he fuck you right away? Will he return the favor first? You clenched around nothing when you remembered about his tongue piercing.

Deep in your thoughts you didn't even notice him putting his clothes back on in silence. It wasn't till you heard his footsteps that you realised..this asshole was walking away, as if nothing happened. 

"Niragi, what the fuck are you doing?" You yelled, quickly getting up and running after him.

"What does it look like?" He asked, without turning around. "I'm going home. In case you haven't noticed, the game is over."

"Wait..what about our deal?" This couldn't end like this, not after everything that happened, not after you risked so much..

"I'll see you at the next game, sweetheart. And don't forget about our date afterwards!" 

And with that he left.

#alice in borderland #aib #alice in borderland x reader #niragi x reader #niragi alice in borderland #niragi suguru

[tom-holland-parker]

I Wanna Wear Your Tie

Request: Can you please do a professor tom x student reader, she’s of age of course, and he takes a liking to her for being so smart and he can barely contain himself with every outfit she wears. And one day after class he asks her to hang back and things get very SMUTTY?

Warning: 18 + SMUT (oral, choking, vaginal sex), student/teacher relationship, cursing, age gap (legal)

Pairing: Professor!Tom x Student!Reader

Word count: 4081

Masterlist

Tom knew from the first time you walked into class he was going to have a hard time. Not because you were a trouble maker, he heard from your other professors that you were an extremely bright and well rounded student, but because you liked to wear the shortest sundresses he’d ever seen. Tom knew he fucked up by developing a crush on his student. It was immoral and he could lose the job he worked so hard to get. 

Tom had been staring at the email all weekend, debating all his choices. He knew the right thing to do was to report it and let the school handle everything, but a big part of him told himself to do otherwise.

Dear Professor Holland,

I want to wear your tie while you fuck me

Love Y/N

Tom let out a deep breath as he rubbed his eyes, refreshing his inbox once more in hopes you had sent another email, an explanation or maybe even an apology, anything that would avoid him having to send the response that he had drafted Friday night after he received your message. Of course as the hours passed he knew that hoping was pointless, Tom sighed looking over his drafted email for what seemed like the 100th time before hitting send. 

Ms. Y/L/N

In regards to your last email I have no choice but to report it to the school. I do, however, acknowledge that you are one of my highest scoring students so it is only fair that I give you a chance to explain yourself. Please meet me in my office Monday after class

Professor Holland

Little did Tom know you were freaking out, spending Saturday nursing your hangover from partying Friday night. It was a drunken mistake, you would’ve never sent the email had you been sober but leave it to the vodka to let you do something stupid.

You had one day to come up with some apology and still couldn’t find the right words. Countless drafts saved in your notes app, but none good enough to express the regret you felt by sending that email. Of course time wasn’t on your side and the hours moved faster than usual. Finally it was Monday afternoon and you sat in your door waiting for your final class of the day, his class

“Maybe if you just tell him it was a mistake he’ll understand” Your roommate Kendra laughed as she looked at your computer, you’d been rereading the email for hours, hoping it would go away. Glancing at the clock you sighed, “I have his class in an hour, how am I going to face him”

“You could skip”

“I’m already in enough trouble as it is I can’t skip class” You sighed, closing the laptop as you moved to put on your shoes, “I’ll just give the best apology he’s ever heard of and hopefully it’ll all work out”

Kendra chuckled, “who knows maybe you’ll get exactly what you wanted”. You rolled your eyes, “I’ll text you after class”

///

Tom watched as you entered class, his eyes trailing over your outfit, you were wearing his favorite dress, white with blue flowers. He chuckled at your innocent appearance but frowned when he noticed you taking a seat in the back instead of your usual seat in the front.

You showed up to class right on time, looking at your feet to avoid any eye contact with Tom. It was hard to concentrate when all you could think about was that stupid email. It didn’t help that he was wearing a tie today, the same tie you’d imagine him gagging you with on most nights. You shook your head trying to focus on forming an apology that wasn’t absolutely pathetic

“Alright class is over, If you have any questions about the assignment you can” his gaze shifted towards you, “email me”

Your eyes widened as you distracted yourself by putting your things in your bag. As if the universe wanted to see you completely embarrass yourself in front of the teacher you’d been crushing on all semester, you piled out the class with the rest of the students, trudging down the hallway towards his office. You stood outside the door for a few minutes, pacing back and forth as you tried to compose yourself. You took a deep breath, gathering all your courage as you knocked on the door 

“Come in” You heard his muffled voice from behind the door. You took a deep breath as you twisted the door knob walking into the well lit office. 

“Hi Professor, you said you needed to see me” You say trying to seem innocent. He cleared his throat pointing to the leather seat in front of his desk, “Please have a seat” 

Slowly you make your way to the seat, placing your bag on the floor as you stare at him. Tom took a deep breath, opening the email as he passed you his laptop, “When I get an email from my brightest student I expected a question about her latest essay not this”

Your face heated in embarrassment as you handed him the laptop, “Professor I’m so sorry I was very drunk Friday night and I know that isn’t an excuse but I didn’t mean to send that. If I could take it back I would just please don’t report this”

Tom watched as tears slowly began to trail down your face, “y/n I’m not going to report you”. 

You looked at him in disbelief, “Seriously”

“but you’re not getting off that easily” He closed his laptop, “You’ll be spending the week and your weekend helping me grade papers”

You let out a sigh of relief, “thank you professor I’m really sorry it ever happened”

Tom chuckled, “You’re one of the smartest girls in my class. I would hate to see you get in trouble because of one drunk mistake” You wiped your tears away, feeling yourself relax now that you knew you weren’t going to be in too much trouble. “After all you’re only young once, just try to keep your thoughts in a diary and not your emails”

You chuckled, picking up your bag as you got up to leave, “will do professor”

///

Tom instantly regretted his decision. Don’t get him wrong, having the extra help was amazing but it was hard to concentrate when all you wore were short dresses. He spent all week sitting at his desk, too afraid to get up for fear that his body would betray him and you see the hard on he was trying desperately to get rid of. Seeing you in class was hard enough but when he watched you in what seemed like your natural element it changed something in him.

He watched as you sat on the couch in his office, your hair tied back and your glasses slowly sliding down your face, every once in a while you had to push them back in place. Tom couldn’t help but smile at the faces you made while reading the essays, a look of annoyance when you read over an obvious mistake or the way your eyebrows furrowed when you wrote the feedback. He tried his hardest to keep his laughter inside whenever you got distracted and drew little faces in the margins. He hated to admit it, it made him feel terrible, but he was a professor falling for his student

“Professor I’m not sure about this” You said getting up from the couch as you walked towards his desk. Your voice knocked him out of his trance as he watched you hand the paper to him, “See the evidence goes along with the topic sentence but the explanation is still choppy” 

You watched as Tom took the paper from you, your breathing hitching when his hands grazed over yours. You shook your head reminding yourself that you were already here because your stupid feelings and if you kept letting yourself indulge in what was supposed to be your punishment you were going to end up in the deans office.

“I see what you mean,” Tom said looking over the paper, “just circle the paragraph and place it in the pile and I’ll look over it later.” He looked up, surprised to see how close you were to him, your chest inches away from his face. It was just his luck that you decided to wear a low cut dress today.

“Okay” You replied, taking the paper from him as you slowly moved back to the couch. Tom glanced at the clock noticing how late it was getting, “Well it’s getting late and you probably want to spend the you weekend somewhere way entertaining than here so you can leave, punishment over”

“Are you sure? I still owe you two more days and it doesn’t feel fair to end my punishment early” You said, grabbing another paper. You weren’t sure if you wanted to stay because it actually felt unfair or if you really just wanted an excuse to keep spending time with him. 

“Well if you insist, '' he chuckled, a part of him happy that you weren’t eager to leave, “But we can finish this tomorrow afternoon, I’ll walk you out”

You gathered your things, meeting Tom at the door where he waited for you, his hand resting on your back as he guided you out the room, locking the door behind him. “It’s dark, I’ll walk you to your car, Where are you parked?” Tom said looking at the parked cars on the street

“I don’t drive” You said awkwardly, “But my dorm is only a few blocks away from here I don’t mind walking”

Tom shook his head, “No way I’m letting you walk, it's too dangerous, I’ll drive you.” You watched as he took his keys out his pocket unlocking the black BMW parked across the street.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to get in the way” you looked down on your feet, here you were again too flustered to even look at him. Tom chuckled at your nervousness, “Don’t worry about it. I insist on it.” Your breath hitched as he placed his hand on your back again, guiding you towards the car.

It only took a few minutes for him to get to your dorm building, “well here we are” He said, parking his car before looking at you. You glanced at him nervously, “Thanks Professor”

“Call me Tom” he chuckled, “But only when were alone”

You wanted to punch yourself for feeling butterflies but you couldn’t help it. “Well Tom” You laughed, calling him by his name felt weird, “thank you”

He watched as you moved to grab the door handle but froze, “Oh I forgot to ask you about your assignment”

“What’s up?” he shrugged. “Well I know you wanted us to write about how the author uses the women in his novel to display power but I can’t write about that. The author clearly doesn’t see the woman as symbols of power he sees them as sex objects, which is shown multiple times throughout the text so I can’t write about something that isn’t true”

“So you don’t believe sex is a form of power?” Tom questioned trying not to smile at the way your brows furrowed in concentration

“Of course I believe sex is a form of power but for the author to display women having sex as a symbol for powerful femininity the woman would have to own their sexual desires and wants”

Tom chuckled, “If you really feel so strongly about that then write about it, I’d love to hear more about what you have to say about owning your sexual desires. Seems to me you know a lot about that” 

“Oh my god” You hide your face in your hands, “I didn’t even realize-”

“Don’t be embarrassed, if you can’t joke about it then you’ll let it eat you alive” Tom chuckled

“Well” you smiled, “I should probably get to writing”

“Yeah you should”

You both didn’t even noticed the way you both began to slowly lean into each other, the tension in the car growing thick

“Goodnight professor”

“It’s Tom” He said with a smile

You scrunch your nose, “Goodnight Tom”

Your faces were inches away from each other. He couldn’t help but steal a quick glance at your lips before looking back at your eyes. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t do the same, “Goodnight y/n”

You both stayed silent, letting the tension take over. Your lips grazing over each other. The kiss was slow at first but it soon progressed into passionate open mouth kisses, both of you giving into your desires.

Your hands reached to grab his face, shocked at how soft his cheeks felt. “Wait wait wait” Tom said, pulling away slowly. 

You caught your breath, wiping your lips as you moved back into your seat, “I should probably go”

Before Tom could say a word you were out the car rushing towards the dorm building. “Fuck” he said to himself as he leaned back into his seat. He knew he’d fucked up, but he couldn’t help the way he felt when he kissed you.

///

When you knocked on Tom’s office door the next day you were even more nervous than you were Monday. You were too embarrassed and instead of facing the problem head on you did what you did best, ignored it. 

You spent the afternoon on the couch, headphones on as an excuse to block out Tom. If you had a question you didn’t ask it and when you had a comment you didn’t say it. It was pure torture for you and Tom, yet you both chose to ignore the elephant in the room.

As the hours passed and the sun began to set Tom’s patience was growing thin. He couldn’t pretend like the kiss never happened, and if he was being honest with himself he wanted more.

You sighed in frustration, as hard as you tried to concentrate on the papers in front of you, you just couldn’t. Thoughts about last night flooded your brain making it hard to concentrate on even the simplest sentences. You threw the paper on the couch, ripping your headphones off, “I’m sorry but this silence is killing me, can we just get this awkward conversation over with”

“Alright well” Tom stared at you, unsure what to say. Yes he felt wrong but he also didn’t care. He got a taste of you and now he wanted more, “I apologize for what happened, it was completely unprofessional on my part”

You cleared your throat trying to find the right response, “yeah, well, I'm sorry too, we were both in the wrong and it shouldn’t have happened and I’m really hoping we can just move past this” 

“Yes I agree” Tom nodded his head, “So how are those papers coming along?”

You shrugged, sitting down in the exact leather chair you’d sat in on Monday, “There needs to be a study group or something, I mean if this is the writing skills of our future world leaders I’m honestly a little concerned”

Tom chuckled, his hands instinctively reaching for his tie, something you noticed he did subconsciously. Your heart skipped a beat as your stomach fluttered, “god get a grip girl” You thought as you blinked your lust filled thought away.

Tom smirked, noticing your reaction to the way you reacted to him, “Yes well not everyone has an easy time with writing as you do”. He touched his tie again, this time tugging on the knot a little.

Your breath hitched as your brain went foggy. A low chuckle leaving his mouth as you shook your head, “Well I’m not that great of a writer, I mean I have countless drafts that no one sees”

“Really?” Tom played with his tie, loving how much the simple habit affected you, “How many drafts did you make before you sent that email?”

Your eyes widening in surprise, “no drafts. Drunk me is the best writer”

Tom smiled, getting up from his seat as he moved to stand in front of you. You watched as he leaned against his desk. You bit your lip as you leaned back into the chair, enjoying the way that Tom seemed so much taller than you.

“You know you probably shouldn’t say that to your professor”

You smirked, “There’s a lot of things I shouldn’t say to my professor” You were playing with fire but the heat felt too good, it made you want to know what the burn felt like. “Fuck it, what’ve you got to lose” You thought to yourself as you smiled.

“Oh yeah?” Tom’s eyebrow raised in question as he leaned down towards you, his face only inches from you, “things like what?”

You smiled bringing your lips close to his ear, “Like how much I want you to fuck me”

The groan that left Tom had your thighs clenching together, “Yeah you definitely shouldn’t tell me that.” You chuckled as you leaned back in the seat, Tom’s eyes moved over your body like you were a work of art, “but then again as a teacher I probably shouldn’t want to fuck my student so badly”

Your lips parted in surprise as Tom smirked, his fingers gently trailing up your thigh. Your breath hitched in anticipation but a disappointed sigh left your mouth when his hand didn’t move past the hem of your short dress. “If this happens no one can know”

You nodded your head as his hand grabbed your chin, keeping your head in place and forcing you to look into his eyes, “Words darling”

“No one finds out” You gulped, your body frozen. You could feel yourself getting wet from the power he held over you. The feeling of his having control over you was intoxicating

“And you understand that I will never use this against you? You can leave right now and I will forget this ever happened and we can go right back to our normal professional student-teacher relationship”

“I understand professor” You nodded, wanting nothing more than for his hands to be all over you. 

“Good girl” He smiled, placing a quick kiss on your forehead, “Now go sit on my desk and spread those legs”

You smiled, quickly doing as you were told. Tom chuckled, amused by your excitement. You watched as he got on his knees, his eyes never leaving yours as he places kisses up your thighs, occasionally leaving a mark that would stay for days to come. “You’re so wet, all this over a couple of kisses?” He teased

Before you could answer Tom moved your underwear aside, placing a gentle kiss on your clit. You moaned, your hand instinctively reaching for his hair. “I knew you would taste good,” He said, licking his lips. He ate you like you were his last meal, licking and slurping you like a starving man. 

You’d never been more thankful that the school was empty on Saturdays, no one around to hear the moans that Tom was coaxing out of you. “Oh god” Your hips shamelessly bucking against his face as he pulled your legs onto his shoulder.

“Tom please” You whimpered as his tongue slowed down to a teasing pace. He groaned, his large hand slapping your thigh, “It’s professor.” His voice was demanding and powerful. Your eyes rolled back as his fingers stretched you, toes curling as he effortlessly found your g-spot. “Professor please I’m gonna cum”

“Cum for me baby” He moaned, “I want your cum all over my face”

His fingers moved faster as you reached your breaking point, loud moans leaving your mouth as your back arched. You could feel Tom smirking against your clit as your legs began to slightly shake. 

“You sound so pretty when you cum” Tom said as he stood up, your cum making his face glisten in the last bits of light that came from the windows of the office. You couldn’t help yourself, grabbing his shirt to pull him closer as you licked your cum off his face. 

“Someone’s eager” He joked as you kissed down his neck. “Hmm I can’t help it, you just look so sexy with my cum on your face. Plus I’ve been wanting this all semester so are you gonna give me what I want or am I gonna have to get it from someone else”

Tom’s jaw tightened as he grabbed your wrist, “Don’t be a brat or I’ll edge you all night and leave you with nothing”

You whimpered as Tom pulled you off the desk, “Now if I remember correctly,” you watched as he loosened his tie, “You wanted to wear this.” You nodded your head, watching as he took off the blue and white tie, taking a deep breath as he placed it around your neck. 

“And as much as I love you in this dress, I think I’d prefer for you to be out of it” He smirked. You chuckled, turning around so he could unzip the dress, letting the fabric pool at your feet. Tom’s arms snaked around your body he pulled your back into his. His fingers playing with your nipples, squeezing and pulling the sensitive area. You bit your lip, rubbing your ass against his hard on, your pussy desperate for more attention.

“Professor” You wined, “I want you”

“So needy baby” He chuckled against your skin as he kissed up your shoulder and neck, “Don’t worry, you’ve been a good girl I won’t tease you too much”

Your head rested against his shoulder as his hand twisted the tie, making it tighter around your throat, “Is this okay?” You nodded, wincing when his hand roughly slapped your ass, “Come on sweetheart you're smart enough to know that when I ask a question I expect an answer. Now use your words”

“Yes Professor” You said moaning as his hand gently rubbed the area he’d just hit. Tom quickly unbuckled his pants, pushing them down as he aligned himself with you. He teasingly rubbed the head of his cock on your clit, loving the low whimpers that escaped your mouth as your hips jolted up. 

Tom’s grip on your hips tightened, pushing you down into the desk as he bottomed you out. You moaned loudly as he began to thrust into you, “This is what you wanted right? Your professor fucking you like a slut”

You gripped the desk, trying your best to keep your balance. Tom gripped the tie again, the fabric pulling your head back. “Faster please Professor” You begged as you moved your hips. 

His hips sped up as his hand moved in front of you tracing figure eights on your clit. You became light headed from how tight the tie was but you couldn’t care less it all felt too good. “Sir Please It’s too much I’m gonna cum”

“Go on baby cum on my cock, give it to me” Tom sped up, becoming needier as he came closer to cumming. He pulled your body into his, fucking up into you as he kissed the harsh line where the tie met your skin. The sensation was too much for you as you came, your walls squeezing Tom, milking his cock of all his cum as he came shortly after you.

Your body went limp, leaning against the desk so you didn’t fall to the floor. Tom sighed, pulling out of you, groaning when he saw his cum leaking out your abused hole. “You did so good” Tom whispered as he kissed up your spine, “Such a good girl for me”

You slowly got up, turning around to face him as you wrapped your arms around his neck. Tom smiled, picking you up and moving you to the couch, where you sat cuddled in his arms. “Are you okay?” he asked, still placing kisses all over your body

“I’m cold” You said, your head resting against his shoulder. He chuckled, quickly grabbing his jacket from his chair before returning to your tired body. You laid in his lap with his jacket wrapped around you, Tom’s hand running up and down your spine as he kissed your forehead.

You glanced at the clock, “it’s getting late”

Tom sighed, “let’s just stay like this for a little while, then we’ll get you dressed and I’ll drive you to your dorm”

#professor!tom holland #professor!tom #tom holland #dom!Tom #tom holland imagine #tom holland fanfic #tom holland one shot #tom holland au #tom holland angst #tom holland smut #Smut #tom holland x reader #tom holland x reader smut #tom holland x reader fluff #tom holland x reader angst #student!reader #professor!tom x reader #Professor!tom x student!reader #tom holland blurb #professor!tom smut