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maccreadysbaby · 6 months

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A Hundred Days to Become a Wayne

batfamily + oc insert

tw: none :)

wanna start from chapter one or read more? here’s the table of contents!

ey, it’s cass! jsyk i’ve decided to learn some asl with bentley and i am LOVING IT! i learned all the lines and phrases she teaches him before i wrote this :’)

part nineteen

❝ RAIN CHECK ❞

THURSDAY — 10:36AM — DAY 61

BENTLEY WOKE UP IN DICK’S BED, TO SOMEONE STROKING HIS HAIR.

“Hey, kiddo. I’m leaving, but it’s still pretty early — do you want me to carry you to your bed, or leave you here?”

Bentley struggled to pull his eyes open, but when he did, Dick was looking back at him. The bedroom lights were still off, but the bathroom ones were on behind him, outlining him in rays like some kind of mystical glow. There was no light shining in from the windows. His hair was floppy and wet-looking like he’d taken a shower. How had Bentley slept through that?

The child replied with a small groan.

Dick chuckled, cracking his signature smile. “Okay, I’ll leave you here. I just wanted to let you know I’m leaving so you’re not confused when you get up, okay?”

Bentley hummed lowly in response, his eyelids already fluttering closed.

He heard Dick chuckle again. Bentley opened his eyes when he stood up, and as soon as he took a step toward the door of the room, Bentley shot a hand out from under the comforter and grabbed onto the hem of his jacket.

He remembered the nightmare fiasco that had happened the night before, and he wanted to make sure Dick knew he cared even if he was half asleep. How was he supposed to say that but not actually say that? He didn’t want to say anything about the dream because the vigilante seemed to be in better spirits now. He wanted to come up with something good to say, but he was so tired, and he just wanted Dick to know. Why was it so hard to think when he was tired?

“Stay,” Was the whisper that came out of his mouth. His sleepy brain found it close enough to something that conveyed his point.

Dick brushed his hand through Bentley’s hair again. “I’ll be back before dinner,” He promised.

Bentley hummed. That wasn’t really what he was going for, he didn’t want Dick to feel guilty for leaving.

“No, just…” He murmured, peeling his heavy eyes open and glancing around. Dick was crouched beside the bed again, not next to the door. “N’til I fall asleep?”

“Of course,” Dick replied with a warm smile. Bentley settled back down into the mattress and closed his eyes, relaxing beneath the repetitive, comforting way the vigilante was stroking his hair.

He thought about saying something else, but he was too tired to come up with it.

It didn’t take very long for Dick to lure him back into the depths of sleep. He only counted seven strokes before he let go of Dick’s jacket and drifted away.

—

Bentley jumped awake with an embarrassing little noise when an unmistakable crack rumbled the Manor under him.

The windows in Dick’s room had light shining through them now, dim and gray. The unmistakable, harsh white noise of raindrops pelting the house made a resounding dread surface somewhere inside him. He rubbed his eyes with his fists, slowly recalling the previous night, and the conversation with Dick earlier that morning.

He pulled himself out of Dick’s bed, suddenly wishing he wasn’t alone in it anymore. The thunder vibrated the floor under his feet and reverberated in his chest. He took a few steps and pulled one of the curtains away from the window, wincing at the deep gray sky and pouring rain on the other side. The thunder rumbled and lightning struck, arcing across the sky in a blinding, wild manner, and Bentley flinched away from the glass.

Downstairs.

He padded out of Dick’s room and into the hall, glancing at the doors. Tim and his own were the only other ones open, and he found that Tim often left his open when he rushed out for work. He made his way to his own door.

His bed was still unmade from climbing out of it last night, and his lamp was still on. The clock sitting on his nightstand read 10:28am — that meant the house would be nearly empty thanks to school and work. (And whatever Dick and Jason did that allowed them such random off-time to spend at the Manor.)

A merciless crack of thunder made it sound like the lightning was tearing down the house and sent him thudding down the hall in his pajamas. He could hear his heartbeat rising in his ears, and his nerves buzzing under his skin and in his chest like they always did when it stormed. He just needed to get downstairs, and find a distraction, and he’d be fine.

He padded down the stairs and into the entryway, turning at the bottom into the adjacent hallway. That was where the library was, where he felt comfortable last time. But he assumed that last time, the comfort was provided, not so much by the room, but by the person in it.

So he found himself looking for the one Wayne he’d been so determined to stay away from, the one that might be onto him, that definitely wouldn’t waste a second killing him if he really tried to betray them.

Jason.

Bentley tip-toed down the dark hall toward the double doors of the library. He could hear Bruce talking in his office as he passed, probably on a call or in a meeting. He tried his best not to make much noise as he turned into the library.

The lamps were off. The fireplace was off. It was almost pitch black from the nasty storm outside mixed with the curtains, and as he anxiously scanned every last chair and couch, he deflated.

Jason wasn’t there.

He inhaled shakily and took to quietly searching the other rooms. He checked the den, but it was dark and vacant, too. Alfred was in the kitchen alone. Well, unless Alfred (the cat) counted, because he was laying at the Butler’s feet, purring. The dining room was empty. Everything was empty and apparently no one but Bruce and Alfred were home. He basically considered it a crime to bother Bruce while he was working (even after Bruce’s very specific instructions to please bother him during work if he needed something) and, wasn’t Alfred technically always at work? Bentley wasn’t going to bother him, either.

So Bentley thudded back up the stairs by himself, arms wrapped around his body to provide a little comfort. Every crack of thunder and lightning strike only added to his growing desperation of finding Jason, and pushed him ever closer to crying because he couldn’t.

He made his way to the end of the hall, back where he started.

Except he didn’t venture back into Dick’s bedroom — although he might — he stopped at the one across from it. Jason had had plenty of opportunities to kill him and still hadn’t. Maybe he wouldn’t kill him for knocking on the door. After all, he knew Bentley was afraid of thunderstorms, so it wouldn’t be very surprising for him to knock, right?

Another loud-enough-to-shake-the-house crack of thunder is what finally made him rap his knuckles on the white door in a toxic mixture of panic and desperation. He tried to ignore how badly his hands were shaking. Maybe Jason wouldn’t notice.

A second passed. Then ten. Then twenty.

Jason definitely wouldn’t notice — because he wasn’t home.

The realization crashed over Bentley, leaving nothing but fear and dread in its wake, so he lifted his hand and knocked again. He pretended his eyes weren’t burning as badly as they seemed to be.

Maybe he was just sleeping. Maybe he wouldn’t be mad at Bentley for waking him up.

After his third and final attempt, his vigorously burning eyes decided to spill hot liquid down his face without his consent.

“Jason?” He half whispered, internally begging for him to open the door yet. He flinched when lightning flashed in the window at the end of the hall. “Jason, m’scared…”

He stood there for a few moments more, tried to shove away the lump in his throat (though it was futile, he still had tears running down his face.) and padded back to the stairs. He thudded down to the first floor and past Bruce’s office without sniffling too much, heading into the dark library.

He flipped on the brightest lamp, an old-style one that sat in the front corner, and pulled himself onto the couch. The thunder rumbled again and he curled up against the leftmost armrest, bringing his legs up and wrapping his arms around them.

The Manor kept vibrating under the intense rumbles of thunder. Bentley didn’t think there could be a storm worse than the first one he’d endured, but now here he was, all teary and shaking on the same exact couch. Without Jason.

He sat there for what seemed like years (ten minutes, actually) until someone was bold (or concerned) enough to walk in.

It was Cass. He hadn’t known she was home, but to be fair, she wasn’t very easy to find unless she wanted to be found. Her short, dark hair was wavy but neat, and she was wearing a baggy t-shirt and chunky sweatpants. He turned away when she came in and wiped his tear-streaks on the knees of his pajama pants.

He didn’t want to take any chances with Cass. In fact, he didn’t really want her in there at all. His father’s file made sure to express just how dangerous she was, and for as long as Bentley had been in the Manor, she had been the hardest to understand. She didn’t talk much, compared to the rest of the Waynes, she just spectated. Watched. Calculated. No words, no patterns, not even incriminating glares or fond little glances like the rest of the family. She was just quiet. With that on top of her stealth and assassin training, Bentley had good reason to be slightly (aka deathly) afraid of her. (Then again, he had been afraid of Damian at first, and Jason, but they were turning out to be people Bentley really liked.)

Cass walked across the room and plopped down on the other end of the couch. He watched her closely until he found it fit to look away, playing with the hem on the bottom of his pants. He did that for a few moments before a clap of thunder drew a pitiful little sound out of him that he would’ve been embarrassed about had he not been fighting off waves of terror.

Bentley glanced over just in time to see Cass make a gesture with her hands. It wasn’t normally the way people moved their hands when they spoke — it was more precise, exact. He remembered one of his father’s clients moving their hands like that, and his father just moved his hands right back. It was the quietest three-hour-meeting ever. He’d seen Cass exchange hand signs with other people around the house before, but he was like, ninety-nine percent sure Cass could hear. And that just confused him more.

He didn’t move, nor did he say anything. He just sat there and tried not to shake the whole couch with his anxious jumping that came with every single clap of thunder.

“Looking for Jason?”

Bentley looked over at her, drawing his knees in closer. It would be no use to lie — she’d probably been watching him like the ninja spy she was anyhow. Instead of trying to force out words, or remaining unresponsive, he nodded.

“Afraid?”

Again, it would be useless to lie. He was trembling and halfway to tears right next to her. So he rested his head on his knees and nodded into them.

A moment of silence passed, and then: “Do you want to see something?”

He glanced over at her again. He supposed any distraction would be good at this point. Cass turned to face him on the couch, with her back against the opposite armrest, and held a hand out toward him. “Your.”

She held out two fingers on each hand and tapped them together. “Name is…” He watched as she made seven different gestures, one for each letter of his name. She spoke the letters as she made the signs. “B-E-N-T-L-E-Y.”

He glanced back up at her face, and she smiled faintly and continued, pointing at herself. “My-” She did the same gesture as before, but different letters afterwards. “-Name is C-A-S-S. Do you want to try?”

She continued to move her hands as she spoke. Bentley thought learning how to talk without actually having to talk would be brilliant, since he wasn’t able to force words out of his mouth half of the time anyways. He unraveled himself a little and nodded.

She lifted her hand to her chest again, and waited for Bentley to copy her movements. “My name is-” He struggled to get his fingers just right for that one, but after a moment, he tapped them together like hers. “-B-E-N-T-L-E-Y.”

She patiently waited for him to get the gesture of each letter before she moved on to the next. He only had to fix his ‘E’ a couple of times.

Over the course of the storm, she taught him a lot of random signs. She taught him how to bob his fist for yes and shake it for no, as well as how to tell someone if he was sick, lonely, tired, hungry, scared, happy, excited, and a whole slew of other adjectives. She’d also taught him words like stupid, annoying, and weird, which he assumed she used to describe other people in the manor. She taught him modifiers like very, good, bad, hard, easy, and so on. He’d forgotten about two-thirds of everything he’d learned by the time the storm passed, but to be fair, she’d helped him forget about the thunder, too.

—

dedicated to @sassenashsworld💛

—

tag list (ask me and I’ll add your @!)

@fleur-alise @sarcopterygiian @cademygod

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scrunkalicious · 3 months

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MARTOR LORE DROP??????

I was like zaymn I should prolly share some shiz

First time sharing this much,, pleab b nice 2 me,,, 🥺

The two met before the time that the Arcane show started,,

Marly is an art student at Piltover’s Academy, but also specializes in History, Writing, and Genetics (SCIENCE MENTION?? 🤯🧬🧪)

Originally met Viktor via having to show him around the school when he walked in and became Heimerdinger’s assistant enrolled,, a friendly tour guide pretty much!!

With Marly being easygoing as well as easy to talk to, the two got along quickly

She’s fast to accommodate for others without saying anything. Keeping a nice walking pace for Viktor, avoiding crowded areas, never making any rude comments and being open minded (to which was heavily appreciated by Viktor)

Offered for him to have lunch in the school library with her, so he wouldn’t be lonely

Blud took the offer up, and they had a great time getting to know each other better!!

As time passed they grew closer omgg

Marly could now also be considered somewhat of a scientist, due to spending so much time with Viktor,, bro made her more of a nerd

But she’s still mainly an artist!! She would often draw him and even gift him drawings (Viktor has a lil drawer filled with things from her)

Marly doesn’t care that he’s from the Undercity, and doesn’t mind him limp. She’s very mindful of the latter, and does her best to help him out.

Fun fact she helped design his cane,, when he first arrived he still had some heavy duty sticks he tied together, but soon enough Marly helped get him a new one, practically hand made by her and some friends

Marly is VERY persistent when it came to defending Viktor when other students were unkind to him (she WILL beat their ass and WILL use her words no mercy)

MWHAHA THEN A SCHOOL DANCE HAPPENED? Whaaatt no way,,

Marly definitely went, dressed in a brightly colored dress, ready to party

She spotted Viktor in the corner and went to go over and talk to him

With enough convincing,, they danced together, with Marly being extremely mindful of his leg and all that,,, very happy close intimacy wooaaahhh, then they got juice bc they don’t drink LMAO,,, ooohhh that dance brought them much closer together HOLAY MOLAY

Erm Heimerdinger is catching onto smth,,, encourages Viktor to make a move lmao

SO HE DOES WHHAAAATTT (she said yea)

OOOHHH MAN ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP GO CRAYZEE

TONZ of physical affection,,, cuddlez for DAYZ (Marly is big spoon jsyk v important info mhm)

Oohhhh they are so in love

Old fashioned datez, quality time,,,, picnicz n librariez ouuugghgg

Sleeping in each other’s arms after a long work day AARGH

MARLY KISSING VIKTOR ON HIS BEAUTY MARKZ?? CRADLING HIS FACE IN HER HANDZ AND KISSING HIS FOREHEAD??? LORD TAKE ME NOWWW AAAAAATRGFHCHFG

THE MARTOR BRAINROT IS REAL

okok im done yapping my bad y’all 🤗🤗

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notasapleasure · 1 year

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Safe, 8 episodes (2018), part 2/2

Following on from Part 1. Content warning for child death and parental grief.

Episode 4

This is day 4 since Chris and Jenny went missing, and if we thought the Chahals were going through it already, well, just hold tight.

First we have a flashback of Chris leaving to reinforce 1: his closeness to his mother and distance from his father and 2: presumably Neel’s hypocrisy about mobile phone use (cf. the fmaily dinner in episode 1)

Et puis, a rather heavy-handed scene of the school choir singing a song about drowning while Chris’ body turns up at the lake, with the shots interspersed of course.

But then uh, the headmaster notices that the teacher who has been suspended while the police investigate her for csa is on school grounds when she’s not meant to be.

Tim would like for there to not be a fuss.

Tim does not reckon with Neel finally having a chance to be the Man of the Fmaily or whatever this is

Zoe goes to leave, but Neel grabs her hand and pulls her back. Looks like an underage sex scandal is just what they needed to bring them together again!

We don’t really see Neel’s initial response to the news his son is dead, because Zoe is having a freak-out in the doorway now the police are there. Later, everyone sits round the table and looks solemn.

Zoe is adamant: No.

HANDS ;_;

If the csa allegations don’t save their marriage, maybe the death of their eldest child will!

:( (screen brightness UP though eesh)

At home with the grief liason officer :(

When Tilly turns to Zoe, he looks at the liason officer, like he’s checking for permission, and leaves the room. Very. Carefully.

bb :(

also jsyk, this is all pretty much entirely silent, panic attack-adjacent.

Having got that out of his system safely away from any of his loved ones, before whom he can’t possibly show vulnerability, Neel goes outside to try and work out why there are so many police around still.

And because he’s a generous man who knows we deserved some natural light to hit those eyes for a change.

He’s wandering about in a bit of a daze, but Sophie is there to advise:

The police are there looking for Jenny, so kind of connected to Chris.

Episode 5

Trying his best to look after the others! Their neighbour made some food and brought it round.

He manages to persuade Tilly and Zoe to come and try to eat. Then iInadvertantly reminds them all over again by going to set four places instead of three :’)

Truly, a marriage-saver.

I thought it was worth having the progression of expressions there :’) puppy dog eyes.

Before the little memorial service Tilly wanted, the police come to give an update, saying someone (the family who hid the body badly) has admitted to his accidental murder

Ah lads, it’s tough. Something something symbolism of Neel letting himself show emotion and the family drawing together? Also very important eyelashes.

Episode 6

As far as I remember this is the last one that really has much Joplin in it - it’s just tiny snippets of flashbacks in episodes 7 and 8.

It’s NEEL’s turn for a sinister-looking flashback to the night Chris died...

He’s in his car outside the party (it seems), tears in his eyes, looking at his own hands in whock.

Here are the police with more unhelpful news! The guy who admitted to killing your son......literally could not have done it, according to the evidence.

Tilly appears and his demeanour changes immediately to reassure her.

And then the police are like - ‘oh hey, remember how someone framed you to look like a paedo? Well actually the children at the party were fighting over rumours that you are.’

When you already know what’s coming (and if you read my previous liveblog posts of the series, you’ll know I guessed from like...episode 1?), the acting is really good here. There’s a lot of different factors at play making all the characters assume certain things and the way it keeps them quiet actually works well, I will grudgingly admit.

Oh the neighbourhood’s on fire (literally!) stay home and don’t get into trouble Tilly!

Jenny has reappeared (digitally, anyway), and her dad Tom is trying to track her phone down with the help of ‘BO Bob’ (don’t get me started). Unlike actual policeman Herbie’s software in Hard Sun, BO Bob can give you a precise address. Tom: “That’s Neil Chahal’s house!!!” Like somehow Tom really wants to be able to blame Neel for all this.

I understand that plot-wise, they wanted Tilly alone when whoever-has-Jenny’s-phone rummages in the house and Tom goes blundering in afterwards, but do we really think that parents who’ve just lost a child will leave the other one at home alone while they go out to gawp at a burning building?

Anyway, important hairline update:

Meanwhile Tom, having scared Tilly half to death, gives her her phone and tells her to call her parents, while he waits to make sure she’s safe. Whoever broke in (before Tom, that is), smashed the front door and ransacked one room...

You know, taking the Chahals’ scenes alone, and looking at the following screenshot, what Safe makes me think of most is the inverted interpretation of Goldilocks - Tom just keeps barging into the Chahals’ house while they’re trying to have a marital breakdown/mourn their dead son! Will he give them no peace?

Naturally, Neel gets to wondering why Jenny - who was with Chris when he disappeared - has been poking round his place, after a fire and another dead body in the neighbourhood.

Naturally, Tom doesn’t like that.

Looking for reasons to be mad at Neel, Tom notices that the room that Jenny ransacked was Neel’s office...

Tom: “Someone’s after you.”

Zoe: “What if it’s the same person who killed Chris?”

DC Emma: “What if it’s the same person who framed you as a paedophile?”

aaaaaaaand the moment Neel realises he just has to admit to being the world’s biggest plonker. THEE most wally of a man

Well, actually he needs to see Zoe go into a full-on panic attack first because she thinks the same person might hate her family so much they killed her son, framed her as a paedo and is now going after her husband

Idiot. But I thought you all deserved this one without the CC.

Yes, Neel set his OWN WIFE UP AS A PAEDOPHILE. HIS WIFE WHO IS A TEACHER.

“We were going through a rough patch, weren’t we?”

Sure was, mate!

Off he goes for some air, while every else just stands around like a lemon going (⊙o⊙)

Emma would kind of like to pursue the whole...what the fuck was that angle, but Sophie figures they’ll bring him in later for wasting police time. Tom is very indignant that ‘a man like that’ isn’t getting his comeuppance. “He’s a pathological liar!”

I must point out that at this point they are. STILL. in the Chahals’ house. Zoe and Tilly can presumably hear every word.

Later...

Tilly: “I never want to see him again!” Zoe: “He’s your father. He loves you.” Tilly: “How can you stick up for him after what he’s done?” Zoe: “Your father was the kindest, the funniest, the most caring man I ever met...” [me, first time I watched this, screaming at the TV: WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM THEN??] Zoe: “...and that’s why I married him. That’s why we had you. And Chris.” Tilly: “So what happened?” Zoe: "Slowly you grow apart. And one day, you find yourself doing stupid, terrible things...just so you can feel something.” Tilly: “And that’s what Dad did?” Zoe: “Not just him.”

I just.......what can you do with this? These guys are just into some kinky shit if Zoe remembers how much she loves him because he framed her for sleeping with underage students. I don’t even want to know.

HEY NEEL. EPISODE ONE. WHAT WERE YOU SAYING ABOUT PEOPLE ALWAYS ON THEIR PHONES AGAIN?

Actually he’s processing his grief and reminding himself how much he loves his wife. Sorry babe. Carry on?

oh my god though the love in his voice when he says that in the video. sure whatever I’d probably take him back too*

*I would not, that’s some fucked up shit to frame anyone for let alone YOUR WIFE

But losing your son who you admitted thinking of as a bit of a useless stoner, who you seemed to basically be waiting for him to grow out of his boring teenage phase, apparently puts things in perspective

What better moment to imply a man has something to do with your daughter’s disappearance than when he’s reading messages of condolences at his dead son’s shrine?!

Tom is such a nob smh

(what do you mean I don’t get to complain about Tom because I was trying to get a screenshot of the same grieving man’s boxer elastic?)

Tom, right back at him: “And my daughter is alive!!”

LOW blow dude (he wants to use the chance he still has to save her blah blah)

I am a sucker for the way he softens when Zoe calls him.

She’s been worried sick and needs to admit something of her own. In front of Tom, because otherwise how would our main character be able to unravel the intrigue? Hm?

But it’s ok.

He followed her to the party Chris was at...

And this was the source of him looking teary and shattered in the car that night: Zoe WAS shagging one of her students!

Zoe: “How can you ever forgive me?”

*sad clown music plays*

and TOM JUST BUTTS RIGHT IN AGAIN DEMANDING TO KNOW WHICH TEENAGER SOMEONE ELSE’S WIFE WAS SHAGGING WUWEWUEGAEJKFBHF

“This could have ramifications that could affect me child.”

TOM. GOLDILOCKS. LEAVE THE BEARS ALONE.

Anyway, don’t worry, Ioan was specified as a Year 12 in episode 1, so he’s at least sixteen and therefore a consenting adult NO YOU’RE STILL HIS TEACHER ZOE IT’S NOT OK

For a couple of scenes Neel sits there looking a bit helpless while Zoe sobs her heart out next to him, but in the end they’re fiiiiiine. Even Tilly comes over for a family hug.

And they all lived happily every after!

Let that be a lesson to you all!

If your marriage needs spicing up a bit, try shagging a sixth-former while your other half frames you for shagging a GCSE student. With any luck, one of your children will die horribly and his corpse will be lightly mutilated to really help put things in perspective!

I hate this show. Did I mention I hate this show?

I think, to be honest, on the ‘rewatch’ I saw more things it deserved credit for. It’s a mystery that does bear rewatching, because there’s little to reward you for guessing first time round, but there are subtle clues in the acting when you already know what’s going on. Which is a nice exercise for the actors, certainly, but doesn’t make for a satisfying thriller, for my money. The main problem is still Tom. It would work better as a true ensemble piece about how the mystery around Jenny’s disappearance is exacerbated because everyone has something to hide - which is partly what the show wants to do, but it also wants a Taken-style dad who can rampage around crime scenes gathering his own evidence.

Hey ho. Chinos and eyelashes!

---

Rating

Dead? No

Evil? Now. No. I don’t think that’s the word. But........you just read it. Framed his wife for csa. What. What the. What the fuck.

Affects the plot? Well yes. Do you think Zoe’s ever working again after this?

Oh my god, a rating. Uhh. Aurgh. If you don’t WATCH the show, and just enjoy my screencaps, you might go as high as 4/5. But I did watch the show, so 2/5. He looks amazing, but there are two whole episodes he’s basically not in (LIES imdb) and there’s a lot of...everything else...to wade through.

#adventures in joplin sibtain's imdb page #joplin sibtain #netflix safe #safe (series)#harlan cobin's safe

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quiexxxent · 1 year

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Hmm A DOG(G)Y fooor J too pls,

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

loves to get comfy cozy after... he's a cuddler,

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

hmm, he wants to try dp... giving and receiving, but this one esp counts for the former, :3c he's just a smidge shy about bottoming but uhh, given yahiro... he enjoys it a fair amount.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

answered! but ill say he likes receiving, plenty, and he's pretty easy to turn into a mess w it. gets rly weak in the knees if it goes too long,

and he Does have a desk in his office jsyk,

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

humourous!! he's a very sensual person, but he enjoys being able to laugh w his partners and relax. lots of grinning and even cracking little jokes in the moment, though if he's Rly into it, he starts getting focused and it turns into heavy breathing and such. his attitude generally extends to the bedroom tho,

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

generally... average, maybe a little above average. i think all the hiro quads get a touch of his hyperactivity, so that might have an influence on him, but if left to his own devices then he'd be taking care of business at least three days a week,

#j #hes shyyyyy hes a big guy who likes to bottom

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a-star-that-fell · 2 years

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Jules I need to know what the best MCR songs are. I want to listen to it so I can try to understand why all my friends love it so much. But I have a limited attention span, so, top three songs? Please?

oh *fuck* yeah welcome to the horrors hylian <3

okay so the albums are mostly concept albums jsyk! so these can be contextualized differently based on that. they are also mostly about very heavy material just as a heads up.

my top 3 are the foundations of decay (fair warning this is their most recent one after 9 years of bein broken up and also 6 minutes long) OR helena (if you want a shorter and more “archetypical” song of theirs), famous last words, and skylines and turnstiles (heads up this is their first song and also about 9/11)

i adore pretty much their whole discography tho! my first song was cancer which is…don’t recommend being their first song lol (its about terminal illness, the whole album its off of is really)

#hylian my beloved #augh i love them so much pls join me #jules speaks

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oviids · 3 years

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pls share some of your spn fic recs 🥺🥺

ok, a few things first:

followers and mutuals who do not have supernatural brainworms, kindly avert your eyes

i don’t normally rec or even read much fanfic any more but this is a CRISIS ok (cont.)

there is so. much. content for deancas out there and i have incredibly high standards, several ancient ao3 bookmarks, can speedread, and want to spare you guys the experience of wading through it all.

i also have a section for spn femslash since I was pretty into that back in the day (sadly a lot less fan content for this :/)

I don’t really like au’s or pure smut (I honestly usually just skim or skip those scenes) so if you’re mainly looking for that kind of thing this probably won’t be very helpful to you. jsyk.

i’m not great at describing stuff but i’ll do my best, i’ll also try and add tw’s when neccesary.

i wil try and keep updating this with any other decent fics i find, feel free to rec stuff too since i’m like 7 years behind.(edit 1/25/21) this is getting looooong so i’m going to start making another list on my spn blog rather than update this one

(edit 1/3/21) since this has gotten pretty long i’ve added rating/approximate word counts and marked my particular favorites with an asterisk.

Dean/Cas fic:

So Says The Sword*** - explicit/85k. FUCK its good...au/time travel where dean is not pulled out of hell by cas and says yes to becoming the michael sword. honestly could serve as an alternative to actually watching the show, if you want to get into dean/cas without actually doing that to yourself.

Fata morgana.* - teen/6k, pst s9 finale. very bela centric and i love it, she finds cas looking for dean in hell.

Redemption Road -misc/600+k. an incredibly long fic from a collaborative writing group back in the day. canon divergent from the end of s6 on, has a cool take on godstiel and the leviathans, as well as the lovecratian mythos connection. ngl when i reread it i only made it about 28% in but imo the casual reader can actually stop around there, the rest concerns a lovecraftian apocalypse that is still good (i think i don’t remember it very well) but not required to enjoy the first half. if you prefer i have an ebook version i can send you on gdrive.

Someone Who's Feeling For Me* - mature/45k, s12. they run into lisa braeden and dean thinks cas is into her while cas thinks dean still likes her. treats lisa way better than the show ever did and the miscommunication is pretty funny rather than annoying.

a turn of the earth - mature/95k. time travel fic where cas from s10 keeps showing up in deans life from a few years before s1 to right before the hellhounds take his soul. slow burn, good character study, and at one point cas punches the dad in the face and it rules.

On the Wings of War - teen/85k, canon divergent s5. dean accidentally becomes the Horseman of War. plays fun, fast and loose with biblical lore, michael has some rights.

Named - mature/95k, alternate s5. EXTREMELY blasphemous in a fun sexy way. manages to predict metatron almost to a T. there’s one major character death and its literally jesus christ, everyone is very sad about it and it sets the rest of the story rolling. an alternate interpretation of cas’ mission to raise dean from hell which had me on the floor. ngl its kind of misogynistic at points, but its from 2010 and tracks with late oughts-2010 spn (sorry anna the author did you dirty here:/).

The Girlfriend Experience - explicit/15k. uhhh i don’t normally rec or even read smutty stuff unless someone i know is specifically asking for it but this has stuff like sam trying to be a good ally and dean thinking holding hands with cas is ‘kinda gay :/’ minutes after having gay sex with him.

i crippled your heart a hundred times - explicit/19k, s8. cas confesses his feelings and dean spends a long time getting his head out of his ass about it. truly hits different after the actual confession, despite being written six years early it feels like its actually what could have gone down more or less if the writers weren’t talentless demons who hate us.

My Roots Take Flight** - mature/125k. reverse au where cas is a hunter and dean’s an angel...OR IS IT???? an alternate retelling of s4. tw for briefly being set in a psychiatric hospital/the hospital being mentioned somewhat frequently throughout the fic, plus more references to torture in hell and heaven than usual.

The One Thing You Can't Lose* - teen/4k.you know those posts about how cas is a super-strong super-tough ancient warrior but he just lets dean tug him around because he likes it? thats it thats the fic.

Hands, From Which All Things Are Built - teen/14k, post s8′s ‘goodbye stranger.’ cas is on the run with the angel tablet but keeps in touch with sam and dean by text, he and dean still manage to be terrible at Actual communication.

Autrement, Danger - or, The Account of an Exceedingly Long Day - mature/30k, post s11. a monster that takes the appearance of your soulmate leads to some wild miscommunications and dealing with years of repression, also dean gets to see cas’ true form which is always cool. tw for non-graphic mentions of underage sexual assault/sex work.

Down to Agincourt - mature/explicit/900++++k, endverse continuation. endverse!cas survives his encounter with lucifer and discovers another time-displaced dean from s7. i’ve only read the two of four parts but its really good, veeeeery slow burn, has a lot of fun oc’s and takes a rather surprising but (imo) entertaining and intriguing turn into Hellenic history and mythology. usual tw’s for endverse/endverse!cas but nothing graphic, it’s actually pretty light-hearted (relatively speaking of course).

Nothing Equals the Splendor** - explicit/8k, THEE finale fix it fic you’ve been waiting for! posits that the entire final episode was just a (very bad and lame) djinn’s vision.

like moses and batman and james dean - explicit/31k, post s8. explores dean’s trauma and internalized homophoba from his technically canon experience with sex work and its impact on his relationship with cas. the sex work itself isn’t really shown in any detail but it’s still a relatively heavy fic.

Crazy Diamonds - explicit/25k, s4/alternate s14. fresh-out-of-hell dean and dean from 10 years in the future are displaced from time and sent to each other’s present.

where the weeds take root - explicit/30k. au where the men of letters kick them out of the bunker and they accidentally move out into the country, get over their codependence and semi retire. featuring chicken coop building, sam volunteering at a dog shelter, gardening, and blissfully mundane domesticity.

No Resting Place - teen/6k. djinn dream fic, switches back and forth between cas’ dream of being married to dean and retired from hunting to the aftermath when he wakes up. tw for brief mention of suicide since, y’know, djinn dream.

any port in a storm - mature/52k. post s8 finale. cas and dean have to pose as a couple going through a rough patch for a case and actually deal with their emotional baggage, cas struggles with being human and metatron is up to stuff.

all this and heaven too* - explicit/7k. in the author’s own words ‘...a love letter to every trans person who ever projected onto Dean Winchester.’ absolutely unzipped me emotionally and theologically, its just. so good. tw for very brief mentions of internalized transphobia/dysphoria.

Because it is* - mature/6k, finale fix it. killing chuck does not bring back anyone back and the winchesters spend a very long time dealing with what they’ve lost, cas and dean SOMEHOW still manage to have signifigant communication issues even after the confession. tw for suicidal thoughts/brief attempt.

Vena Amoris and Other Old-Fashioned Bullshit* - teen/4k, s6. when cas fell for dean it automatically soulbonded/angel married them, shenanigans ensue when dean finds out during the angel’s civil war. funny and actually written back when s6 was airing so cas is still (or at least pretending to be) kind of an OP asshole which is fun.

Rinse, Repeat - teen/3k, s8. angsty character study of cas as he’s reprogrammed and trained to kill dean. not really dean/cas since its just cas’ pov of canon events but its beautifully written and ends with him snapping out of it through the power of love (also now a canon event!).

Emergence - explicit/59k, canon divergent after s11. dean meets a hunter he only recognizes as their friend claire novak’s missing father, but soon realizes he might be the answer behind the mysterious void in his memories and feelings (aka everyone’s memories of cas are completely wiped away for three years).

Cuckoo And Nest - explicit/10k, early established relationship/character study, cas tries to figure out how he fits into dean’s life and space in the bunker.

Build a Home* - teen/20k, canon divergent s12. sam and eileen are cute and turn the bunker into men of letters/hunters hq and everyone but cas moves in, mutual miscommunication issues and pining ensues.

Down in the River - teen/5k, early s8, cas prays to dean in purgatory while sam and dean try to figure out a way to get him out.

Teaching Poetry to Fish* - mature/52k, ?? BC through the entire series/canon divergent s14 and 15. retelling of crucial scenes throughout the shows timeline from cas’ pov, feat. actual fish and poetry.

the minor fall, the major lift - gen/4k, post confession/finale fixit. dean goes into the empty to save cas and runs into several old friends (and enemies).

With the Kisses of His Mouth* - teen/3k, gen later seasons. dean and cas keep kissing by accident.

Remaining Grace - explicit/109k, alternate s6. au where cas asks dean for help with raphael and dean, of course, does. tw for temporary major character death/semi-graphic depictions of alcohol withdrawal.

The face of heaven.* - teen/10k, au, dean is a regular guy and cas is a fallen star (think ‘stardust’, kinda).

Stories Are Made of Mistakes* - teen/5k. newly human cas has trouble getting used to a human body and humanity in general, but still figures out that he and dean are A Thing before dean does.

Hurry Up And Wait - mature/21k, canon divergent s12. a fairyland and quite possibly LOTR related case comes up and dean goes full fanboy, mary is introduced to the wonders of the peter jackson adaptions, many references and comparisons (including between cas and dean’s ‘friendship’ and arwen/aragon). also charle is still alive and has just been doing fairy stuff this whole time.

There Are Many Things - explicit/28k, s9. cas is extremely lonely/touch-starved and trying to figure out this whole human thing, as well as where he and dean stand after being kicked out of the bunker.

It's A Long Life to Always Be Longing - teen/40k, post s11 finale. amara helps dean by putting him in a magical coma so he can finally get some much needed rest and show him possible futures for him, sam and cas. meanwhile sam and cas go on a roadtrip (or several) to find componets for a spell to wake dean up. really good sam and cas friendship, they actually talk about their shared lucifer trauma and stuff.

Non-Photo Blue - gen/2k, s4/5/alternate s5. fifty moments from cas’ memories of dean.

Tall Grass - explicit/57k, canon divergent post series. cas becomes the ultimate plant dad. feat the wayward sisters gang, cathartic character growth, fun oc’s, domesticity, and lots of actual botanical info-dumping.

on vessels - no rating/gen/2k. established dean/cas, cas tells dean about how he used to imagine what it would be like to have him as his vessel.

search for tomorrow on every shore* - teen/11k, post-finale (extremely derogatory). some angels in jack’s new heaven act out and dean gets temporarily resurrected in 2003 and runs into his younger self.

Architecture of the Minotaur’s Heart - explicit/45k, very canon divergent post s1. dean’s new house seems to have a life and mind of its own, while in his dreams he sees glimpses of a world and apocalypse that never came to be and an angel that looks strangely like his mysterious neighbor, cas. loosely inspired by the book house of leaves (which i highly recommend for fans of weird horror).

The Distance Of The Setting Sun - explicit/17k, post s5. established dean/cas relationship, team free will finally takes advantage of cas’ abilities to go on vacation around the world.

diamond star halo - teen/5k, s11. dean lets cas use him as a temporary vessel while he recovers from rowena’s spell, sam is a long-suffering third-wheel.

Make Known** - teen/16k, s6/7. dean struggles to understand how cas could have become his enemy and whether he ever truly knew him in the first place.

blunt little instrument* - mature/1.4k, post finale. dean finally confronts his father in heaven, very cathartic.

my heart a compass*** - teen/10k, post confession. the empty forces cas to re-experience his most regretted moments while dean tries to snap him out of it and bring him home.

A Crash Course in Someone Else's History - teen/11k, s6. cas from the very start of s4 is brought forward in time by s6!cas to distract the brothers from his and crowley’s plans.

The Cuckoo Father - mature/8k, s7 au. the woman who found cas in the river post-leviathans does not marry him bc he was sent to her by god or whatever, but actually identifies him as jimmy novak and sends him back to claire and amelia.

The Dead Dean Clause* - teen/5k, post alt s5 ending. team free will celebrates surviving taking down lucifer by getting blitzed, cas lies to a cop and gets an impromptu driving lesson. title/description sound dark i know but it’s actually very funny and light.

Suck It, Judy Garland - mature/20k, s12 (after the ‘i love you...i love all of you’ episode). cas and sam have to pretend to be a couple for a case and dean is NOT happy about it.

By Daylight and In Dream - teen/16k, s5. pre-dean/cas, dean invites cas to use his dreams to hide from the other angels. tw for very brief mention of a memory/dream of alastair sexually assaulting dean.

The Five People You Meet in Heaven - mature/22k, post-canon. an actually happy (if sometimes bittersweet) heaven endgame written several years ago, though some details are rather eerily similar to the show’s ending.

heaven is a place on earth* - teen/2k. dean’s pov of some of the times cas left him behind throughout the show, and one alternate ending where he finally gets to stay.

I Cleanse The Mirror - teen/20k, alternate s6. dean’s body is stolen by an ancient elemental and his soul has to hitch a ride in cas’ vessel.

an exploration of gender; angelic*** - mature/4k. *oscar isaac voice* lets get into angel gender politics!! aka cas is trans.

Zenith - explicit/33k, s9. after 9x06 an angry witch curses cas with the ability to see supernatural beings and human souls.

La cucina. - gen/3k, alt s9. dean goes wild helping a newly-human cas find out what kinds of food he likes, or the early s9 domesticity we deserved!

Dean Winchester, Cocksucker at Rest***** - teen/7k, post-finale. john and mary finally come over for dinner and john reacts to dean/cas in a rather predictable fashion. SOOOOOOOOO good omg, its so funny and a little sad and very very cathartic. part of a series that has a few other really good short fics.

The Way You Didn't Go - teen/5k, s15. coda to 15.09, dean has nightmares about the moc!cas timeline.

On Drowning - teen/28k. dean saves cas after he nearly drowns, they both try and deal with the physical/mental fallout (aka the fic where thee iconic “you only touch me when you think I’m dead or dying” originates). tw for realistic depictions of drowning/triage/misc medical information.

The Thirty-Six Questions That Lead to Love* - mature/13k. claire has dean and cas pretend to be her gay dads for a case and they play the titular 36 question game, get mistaken for swingers, and birdwatch, among other things.

Assorted F/F stuff:

Deep Breaths* - mary/ellen, au where mary said no to azazel’s deal and let john stay dead, still becomes a milf.

Like Rebel Diamonds - krissy/claire, they become hunter gf’s on the hunt for cas to kick his ass for taking jimmy. not-so-stealth dean/cas as well.

To Ash and Bone - anna/ruby, same author as the previous fic (p much all of her stuff is good from what i recall). au where ruby is a witch and helps anna when she’s cursed.

Holy Clockwork Angels - jo/ruby, STEAMPUNK au with very cool worldbuiilding.

At Day's End - jo/anna (my fucking KINGDOM for more jo/anna content, the dean/cas parallels are allllll there), au where they are both at the camp in the endverse and gfs.

these posts - ok so not actually a fic but i’m now obsessed with this hannah/meg dynamic.

Tagelied - mary/ellen, the true story of how ellen got into hunting before angels interfered.

Hell's Bells** - meg/abaddon, alternate s8/9 where meg survives crowley’s attack with sam’s help and teams up with abaddon (who she has a sk year old crush on) to take back hell.

The Ecstasy of the Rose - anna/ruby, anna travels back in time to escape heaven and becomes a signifigant part of ruby’s old human life.

Angel Underground - anna/jo, kind of an urban fantasy au with a very intriguing premise (sadly its very short, i’d love to see more if this ‘verse).

Clover, Flame - billie/mary, billie was always the reaper that showed up to take mary after her death(s) over the years.

Drag Me To Heaven - anna/ruby, a variant on the ‘last night on earth’ thing with dean.

Come Home* - jo/anna, canon-divergent au where anna is the new waitress at the roadhouse and helps jo set up a (probably not really) haunted house for halloween.

#if you told me i'd be doing this in 2020 three weeks ago i'd have laughed in your face :/#deancas #supernatural #fic recs #spn femslash #destiel #fic #the alie tag #spn posting

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aetherarf · 3 years

Note

Could you write something where Rosaria gets blackout drunk to forget about a nightmare she had of her trauma and Diluc helps her home and takes care of her when she wakes up with a hangover?

Here you go! I wrote it as before they became a 'thing', jsyk.

( i struggled too much with any other way of doing it so.... yah. its so bad )

[[ WARNING: HEAVY ALCOHOL ABUSE, TALK OF SEX ]]

[[ Summary: Simply wanting to protect his homeland, he found himself with less and less to do, until a certain sister, walked by, absolutely wasted, and decided to take up his free time.

Word Count: 2'154 ]]

sAnother abyss mage, disappearing into little shards of light and magic, that collapsed to the ground, and slowly...

Gone.

Dead.

Back to the ley lines.

They had been less prominent lately, likely after everything with Stormterror, or rather, Dvalin, and a selfish part of his mind asked him what are you going to do with yourself now?

He didn't really know, but that wasn't the point, brutally silencing that part of his mind, throwing his claymore to the side and, it too, disappeared. Gone and out of sight, until needed again.

The sound of heels on the stone ground of Mondstadt's paths caught his attention... It didn't sound threatening, in fact, the footsteps were far from rhythmic, reminding him of a drunkard who couldn't put one foot in front of the other, likely just about to break their teeth by crashing face-first to the stone.

Instead, there was a thud, but it was quite gentle... And then the footsteps began once again.

Not wanting to have an idiot crack their skull open on the ground, he followed the sound, until he saw a woman, leaning against a building, her head nodding as though she was too drunk to keep it up straight...

Actually, it probably was that, wasn't it?

As he approached, she lifted her head, and an odd, delirious smile fell on her face.

"Hey strawberry man..." She said, slurred, "What's a naughty little business man like you..." Hiccup, '... Doing out so late?"

He examined her clothes... He knew her, Rosaria. Not well, but she was just as much of a drunk as his own brother, and a faint memory of a time he'd rather let die... He was bound to learn her name, and the bare minimum about her.

"Stopping drunks like you from getting killed." He huffed, grabbing her arm, she tugged to try and get her arm away, but it was a lazy attempt that resulted in nothing. "Let's get you back to the Church." He declared, attempting to foist her onto his back, but she just whined at him,

"Nooo... The sisters...' hiccup, "Are bitches... They're just going to yell at meeee..." She flopped onto his back, arms wrapping around him from behind, "Bring me to your place, I'll make it worth your while..."

A slutty sister. He vaguely remembers seeing a piece of erotica like that in Kaeya's room when they were younger...

He shuddered... Then sighed.

She wasn't safe to be left alone... But she also likely wouldn't go back to the Church, or at least, she wouldn't stay there.

It couldn't hurt, could it? He had no intention of taking advantage of her, in fact, he'd probably just stick her in his bed, stay up doing paperwork in his office for the rest of the night, and tell her she absolutely lost it in her inebriation, and that he's not going to 'save her' from herself again.

... seeing how she clung to him, there wasn't really an option, was it? She'd probably cling like a puppy.

"Fine. But you are not to touch me... Below the belt." He said, carefully.

"Oh," she giggled deliriously, "I know how to make anyone squirm just from their neck... Trust me..."

"And stop talking."

She whined, but technically, whining wasn't talking.

So, he lifted her up, carrying her on his back (since she seemed to be content with her face pressed to his upper back) and began walking.

At least it was a good workout, he thought miserably.

...

By the time he got home, a few things happened.

Rosaria had fallen asleep, snored right into his ear, and rain threatening to come.

She then woke up and started singing some horrifyingly bastardized versions of the songs the Church considered holy.

It was almost liberating, in a way, to hear such a thing... He had never been particularly religious, but the Church were oftentimes quite...smothering in their methods.

Not that he would go out of his way to comment on it, not believing it a worthwhile conversation for he himself to have.

Finally to the Vineyard, Rosaria apparently decided that she was content here, stumbling as she tried to take some of the grapes for herself, he all but dragging her inside before she did something truly unforgivable, even if she whined.

"I'm tired..." She said, softly, "I'm so tired of sleeping on the ground. It's cold."

Diluc raised a brow at her, seeing how she seemed... possibly genuinely upset.

"You won't be sleeping on the ground, you'll have a warm bed." He, awkwardly, tried to comfort her, and her expression lit up.

"Really?"

"Yes. Just... follow me. You'll be sleeping alone, however?"

Rosaria stared at him oddly, but managed to walk on her own, despite her stumbling, and he brought her to the room, she gasping near-silently as she saw his big, soft bed, running to it, half tripping over herself as she fell onto the bed, "Ohh... soft... All it's missing... is a kitty."

A kitty.

"Well, I do not own a kitty. Let me..."

He grabbed her leg, removing her shoes--while he knew that he would be too disturbed to do anything but thoroughly wash the bedding the next day, he did not tolerate anyone wearing shoes into bed in the Winery.

... Huh, for a moment, he was reminded of his father. The apple only falls so far from the tree, after all.

"Hehe," Rosaria giggled, undoing those odd claw-like ordaments on her hands, throwing her headdress across the room, and reaching for Diluc--"C'mere."

He wasn't sure why he was humoring her, but after setting her shoes on the ground beside the bed, he leaned over...

And with a shocking amount of force, she grabbed him, rather, hugged him, and then threw them both to the bed, her face hidden in his chest as she held onto him with a vice grip, "Kitty kitty," She said, words muffled into his coat.

"I'm not--"

Snore.

He tried to pry her off of him, astounded by how she was already asleep and snoring softly, but every attempt was met with only more crushing force onto his ribcage...

...

He sighed.

For some reason, he had a feeling that... she wasn't exactly a threat. Not like this, not to him. Not right now.

So... he sat there. After a few long moments of his mind barely even thinking of anything beyond wondering what had wrought her mind so that brought her to this point, he tried again...

No. She was clinging on, tight. And, well, this was easier to deal with than a drunk and loud woman.

...

Dawn could not come sooner.

... ... ...

Rosaria woke up with her head pounding, so bad she almost wondered if she had a nosebleed, running her thumb under her nose... Nothing. Well, nothing more than the slightest trace of drool, as gross as it was, she must've knocked out hard to be at this point.

But, she realized she was not in the Church. The bedding beneath her was soft, comforting...

...

Hm.

She probably slept with some random bloke and blacked out in his bed. Her hand trailed to her crotch, resting just above it, just below her navel...

No, no, she didn't. Afterwards, especially if she herself did not clean up, she was always... filthy. But she was clean. Maybe he was just particularly kind, and skilled, and had gone out of his way to care for her... Or maybe she...

After clearing her throat, it wasn't raspy, it didn't hurt... Maybe she had a night with some woman, instead? But the morning-after breath, the bitter taste on her tongue just wasn't there.

Well, it was over, and hopefully they were as clean as she was.

Standing up, she saw her own faux claws on the ground with her headdress, and her shoes... Picking them all up and putting them on, she walked to the window, pulling the curtain out of the way...

She nearly hissed at the bright light, letting it stay closed, and she instead turned to the main doorway of the room, deciding she'd either just leave, or find whoever owned the place and ask if there's anything she needed to know before she left...

But the door opened, and she froze, seeing a figure...

... Bright red hair, pale skin, with the faintest hint of freckles that most could never see.

Diluc. She never thought she'd see him ever again.

For a long moment, there was a silence between the two of them...

"... I figured you had a hangover and made breakfast. Come."

He still seemed to be as kind as Barbara insisted he was. She was impressed.

She followed him as he went ahead, looking around curiously... The fine decoration, distant scent of wine... The winery. No wonder the bed was so lovely and soft. However, she wouldn't expect a man who had been put in such a position to...

...

Well, when she wasn't absolutely shitfaced, trying to stop hearing the voices that haunted her in the dark, she was usually pretty good at convincing people she was sober when she absolutely wasn't.

They got to the kitchen, and Diluc went out of his way to begin preparing her plate for her- It was a pretty typical brunch, rather than breakfast, and it all seemed quite well made... Minus the hashbrowns, she'd probably just force it down or not touch it.

He pulled out her chair for her, and she chuckled, "What a gentleman," She said, with a fake smile on her face, letting him push her seat in, taking a bite...

It was quite good. It had been... a long time since she had a warm meal. Maybe she was a little bit touched that someone would make a hot meal, just for her.

"So," She said, after swallowing the first bite, "Do you have any diseases? I'd rather not get shamed by the sisters when getting tested if you're clean."

There was a moment of motionless, and he turned to look at her--She just noticed his hair was down... he almost looked like he had the mane of a fluffy kitty. Heh.

"I'm clearly not sick." He said, a little huffy, and she sighed.

"I mean sexual diseases. All this is payback for a good night, ri-"

There was the sound of shattering, and she pushed herself to her feet--

Diluc was staggering, and he managed, somehow, to look even a shade paler.

"We- We did nothing!" He snapped, and then stood up, "Fin-finish your meal, I... I can handle this."

She hesitated, but sat back down...

Somehow, she wasn't surprised he would act like this, but... "We didn't fuck?"

"No," He sounded... strangled. "We did nothing. You wouldn't go to the Church when drunk, I brought you here, and you dragged me into bed and fell asleep with... no... touching."

Does the word hurt your tongue, little boy?

"Huh," She put a forkful of food into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully, "I guess you're a real gentleman."

"I'm not a gentleman." He insisted, the gentle sound of shards clicking together as he swept it up, "I'm just a decent person."

"Decent people don't bring strangers to stay in their homes."

"You're not a stranger."

...

Well. That wasn't... wrong.

She didn't have anything to say, and went back to eating, as he finished cleaning whatever shattered when he tripped like that... Guess there was a reason she didn't feel gross or achy or messed up. She felt... well, better rested than she had in the past few months, and the shock of it all had made her hangover seem so... distant, even if it threatened to come back.

Shoving the last of the food in her mouth, she downed it and took a big drink of water to force it down, and stood. "Well, I'm sure you want me out of your hair--" "Do you need medicine?" He asked, idly.

"Medicine?"

"For your... headache, migraine, whatever you feel during a hangover. I don't have much experience with those."

She looked at him for a moment.

"I'm alright. The meal was enough. But I'll let you get back to whatever a winery owner has to do."

"... Try not to get drunk like that again," Diluc chided, gently, "I don't want to think about what would of happened if I didn't find you."

She chuckled, taking a few steps towards him, grabbing his chin and angling his face to look down at her.

"What a gentleman. And what if I misbehave? And drink anyway?"

He stared at her... blankly.

"It sounds like you're challenging me to take care of you."

"Is it working?" She asked, bemused... "Oh, don't worry, I'll be a good girl. See you next time."

"I dread the next time."

She couldn't help but smile as she found her way out of the winery...

Well, at least he still seemed to have some life in him, after all that's happened.

#genshin impact #diluc #rosaria #rosaluc #diluc x rosaria #anonymous #angst #angsty bark #// eh #request #bark writes #// this rlly wasnt the request but #// i literally couldnt do it any other way

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violenceenthusiast · 3 years

Note

WARNING: transphobia

sorry to intellectualize in your inbox and feel free to like... delete this if it's too heavy or not your thing! but i've been having a lot of ideas about transness in fandom (i'm trans myself btw jsyk where this is coming from) and the whole like... cas-giving-dean-a-male-body thing and today's Discourse wrt that ask lampgate received about "looking trans"

like basically butler says that there's this Thing we all create that's basically an idealized male/female body that doesn't exist. like by labeling bodies as normal/abnormal for whatever reason we create sex, we create normative bodies. we are constantly referencing a non-existent ideal male/female body. claiming that all cis women and all cis men have the same bodies is stupid because they don't. everyone has slightly different hormones and slightly different expressions and that's not even to speak of intersex people who complicate the idea of Normative Bodies even further.

so then oftentimes when i look at transness (more specifically transmasculininity) in fandom - and i mean this in literally the nicest way possible - this tends to get represented a certain way. mostly it's represented in drawings/fics as people who've either had top surgery and have scars underneath their pectorals or people who wear binders, and most of the time they have not had bottom surgery. and while it is important to stress that YES people who look like this do exist and it's good that they are being represented it in no way is the Only or even Most Common transmasculine body. there is no way to "look trans" because there is no kind of Idealized Trans Body in the way that there is an Idealized Cis Body that is referenced. but i worry that in fandom we are creating this sort of Idealized Transmasculine Body by constantly referencing the same type of body that i previously described, which transphobes then weaponize as characters "obviously not looking trans." bc ya know in order to make that statement there must first be a Body That Is Trans.

and then cas bringing dean back in a male body sort of crystallizes this because it both upholds the idea of there being A Trans Body as well as there being A Cis Body. if we theorize about there somehow being a switch between those then there must be some sort of larger concept that we are referencing. it's buying into the non-existent concept of idealized sex, of normative bodies.

(for the record i feel the same way when it comes to temporary gender/sex swap fics. also this doesn't come from a place of "this is bad and Should Never Happen Ever" but more... what are the subconscious philosophical consequences and implications of the decisions we make)

OH addendum to that last ask bc i realize i might've come off wrong: that is not to say that trans people creating content for themselves and others to enjoy are responsible for the existence of transphobia. again i'm trans myself and i LOVE all trans content and i would love to see more of it. i'm just saying that the issue is like... complicated and intertwined and we are unfortunately all still trapped within a system that most people accept as being Right even though we have definitive proof that it isn't

glad for that addendum because that was literally the first thing i was gonna say lol. you can’t pander to transphobes, they’ll always take issue no matter what you do so you might as well just do your thing, yk?

but yea i was a sociology major so this is absolutely my type of thing. basically i agree with you. but i think there is a societal Ideal Type of transness and it’s still very much the “binary trans person who wants to be and look cis and transitions all at once and then passes perfectly and never brings up transness again” which. barf, there’s not enough time to unpack all of that. but at the same time the Ideal Type of transness boils down to: there shouldn’t be one bc it shouldn’t exist. which again, barf. as far as inside the trans community... idk i feel like on average, non trans/med etc. trans ppl are very aware and appreciative of the diversity of transness and the beauty inherent in that? but maybe that’s just my experience. if anything, i feel more worried about intracommunity ideals of transness being warped by whiteness and thinness, if that makes sense. also i think again always good to remember that what any given person posts in fan space will pretty much never be indicative of the full scope of their thoughts and opinions on the subject. but yea also there are ppl where fan spaces are there only queer spaces for example and then what happens if you’re seeing this same image over and over again but it’s not your reflection at all.

i think really what it comes down to with the elements you’re pointing out is that they are just what’s familiar to us? like. 1) as a bunch of twenty-somethings, binders and top surgery, maybe T is about all that most of us have been able to do if anything (at least that’s my impression. OR that may be all we’re interested in, etc. there’s always variation in prefs of course), 2) top scars are just such insanely good visual shorthand, and 3) fanart/fic is always in some way aspirational so as someone who hasn’t gotten to get top yet, i for one like thinking about a dean who got to do that already :)

and yea again any fic/post/etc that has cas changing dean’s body without asking/being asked.... it’s a no from me. bad on the consent side, bad on the conceptions of bodies and gender delineations side, bad on the “right” and “wrong” bodies side, so many things abt it that make me :/. also like even if you have dean brought back in laz rising with a flat chest sans scars, and a whole new set of reproductive organs.... like that’s still a trans man’s body? both literally and rhetorically speaking that still wouldn’t be a Cis Body (assuming you could even define in any meaningful way what it means to have a Cis Body, given the amount of variation in bodies AND the fact that literally every single person is failing the normative bc it’s by nature shifting an unattainable)? but also again, i’m gonna insist that “male body” as synonym for “cis man’s body” sucks bigtime.

#tw transphobia #asks #i had more thoughts but these are the only ones i could get to be coherent #long post #im assuming this will be long on the dash that is. esp on mobile #anonymous

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bethanyactually · 4 years

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I've been following you for years now, and your recommendations are always good. You got me into One Day At a Time. Would you recommend Crazy Ex Girlfriend? What is it similar to? I see you post a lot of it and sorta wonder how you would describe it

Yes! I think if you like One Day At a Time and other shows that I like, you would probably like Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. I can’t really think of anything it’s similar to off the top of my head, but that’s partly because it’s a pretty unique show. I guess you could put it in the same category as Galavant just because there are amazing musical numbers in every episode, but it’s set in modern-day Southern California and is largely about mental health and relationships (not just romantic ones, friendship and family and work relationships too) and figuring out how to be happy.

The show was created and executive produced by two women, Rachel Bloom (who stars as Rebecca Bunch) and Aline Brosh McKenna, and while it’s not perfect, it’s a feminist show with a pretty diverse cast and writers’ room. The show told the whole story that they wanted to tell in four seasons, and it’s full of amazing characters played by very talented actors, many of whom are Broadway veterans. The songs are genuinely good and you will find yourself singing and humming many of them.

Here are a few links to posts that go into more detail:

i can never stress enough how you all should be watching crazy ex-girlfriend by @lauranoncrede

Why You Should Be Watching Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (a slideshow)

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend does not actually glorify stalking by @sarahbatistapereira

the mini-liveblog I did of some of the first season

my two favorite CExGf songs that I show to people to give them an idea of what the show is like:

Heavy Boobs

The Sexy Getting-Ready Song (this one possibly contains some very mild spoilers, jsyk, but I don’t think it’ll ruin the show for you or anything)

#crazy ex girlfriend #Anonymous

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unculturedmamoswine · 4 years

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AoS McKirk Recs

At the request of @fireinmywoods I’m finally getting around to making a McKirk rec post, which I’ve been wanting to do for a while. All these fics are McKirk endgame. This isn’t organized in any way whatsoever, and is also not a comprehensive list. I mostly just scrolled through my bookmarks and picked the things that weren’t outright porn. I always wish reccers would include their own notes along with the author’s summaries so... I did that. Hope y’all don’t mind. I’ll try not to be too spoilery, but I think it’s valuable to see what other fans like about a fic. Also, always heed the author’s notes, warnings, and tags. Definitely check out other fics by these authors, because I’m mostly not reccing a bunch by each person in order to keep this post slightly less long. And please consider leaving comments on the fics!

The palimpsest verse by fireinmywoods (series is 100k words)

Author’s summary (of the first fic in the series): “Skip to the point, Jim. The sooner you spit it out, the sooner I can refuse and get back to work.” “It’s really no big deal,” Jim says as the door slides closed behind them. “I just need you to come down to Hearth with us…as my husband.” The Enterprise has been sent to negotiate reaccession to the Federation with an isolationist religious group known as the Kindred. While there, Jim notices that some of the children seem to be gravely ill. The problem is, the Kindred practice faith healing and refuse to allow a doctor to be brought in. So Jim does what he does best: he improvises.

Gotta start with the gal whose fault this list is! When I read the first fic in this verse I was really at a low point in my McKirk obsession. This fic really brought me back into the fold in a big way. The whole series is just very very full of love. I ALMOST read one of the sequels first but thank god I heeded Em’s warnings to read palimpsest before reading the other fics. Seriously. You need to go into the thing unspoiled. Anyhow, if you want Jim and Bones way way super in love, for sure read this fic.(And listen, if you don’t want to read it because you hate fake marriage please read it anyway. I dislike fake marriage and I read it and loved it. Give it a shot, I beg you.)

Manhattan (Weeks Gone By) by blcwriter (8k words)

Author’s Summary: For the jim_and_bones St. Patrick’s Day challenge, because only I can turn a flash fic prompt into 8000 words. I haven't been able to stop listening to Frightened Rabbit’s “In Living Colour” from their Winter of Mixed Drinks album as I was trying to figure out what I wanted to say for my next story, and then this challenge came along, and literal writer! is literal, so, there you go.The prompt was "Manhattan," and the boys wanted to be married in modern times and run a bar in the Village with the whole gang involved. Non-happy-fun-times ensue before things sort of resolve.

I love a lot of blcwriter’s stuff, but this one is my favorite. It’s a modern day au, and Jim and Bones’s marriage is in trouble. It’s a really wonderful look at people in a long-term relationship struggling to keep it alive and wondering whether to just let it die.

Something so right by blcwriter (series is 13k words)

Author’s Summary (of the first fic in the series): "Don't say we aren't right for each other, the way I see it is.. we aren't right for anyone else."

Okay, I said I wouldn’t rec lots of things by one author and this is my one exception. I HAD to rec this one as well as Manhattan. An utterly fantastic modern day chef au. Jim and Bones knew each other at culinary school but now find each other again as real grown-ups. And the sequel is a Christmas fic! Also contains Jewish Jim, which I’m always a slut for.

That Monogamy Thing by silverlining99 (11k words)

Author’s Summary: Jim thought he was doing it RIGHT.

I also need to mention the fic The Thing About Realizing You Are In Love With Your Best Friend by JenTheSweetie because these two fics are so identical in premise I can only assume they were written for the same prompt. They’re both great, but I slightly prefer That Monogamy Thing, so it got top billing. Both fics are set during the five year mission, or at least they’re set on the Enterprise. Basically, Jim and Bones start sleeping together and Jim assumes they must be now in a Monogamous Relationship(TM) and gets with the monogamy program. Of course, at no point did anyone say they were in a monogamous relationship, so Bones is not on the same page, shall we say. It’s a classic “miscommunication causes delicious but short-lived angst” kinda vibe. You get it.

The Repairs verse by shinychimera and Yeomanrand (series is 69k words)

Authors’ Summary (of the first fic in the series): Young Jim Kirk is unstable and self-destructive, Leonard McCoy is withdrawn and wary, and the obstacles to surviving their first term at Starfleet Academy are not easy to overcome. A dark and brutal tale of the tangled borders between healing and hurting, where hard choices between emotions and ethics have far-reaching consequences; dealing with abuse and alcoholism, affection and neglect, piercings and bar fights, hot and cold sex, complicated questions of consent, and loyalty and love between people who aren't comfortable with either. A whole new spin on "I want my pain, I need my pain."

This one is kinda...whump porn. Like, read the tags. JIm is suuuper messed up and traumatized but sometimes that’s what you need in a fic, yanno? It’s an Academy fic that deals heavily with Jim having been violently abused as a child, and him growing to trust Bones while also kind of learning how to be an adult, rather than living life as the abused child he’s spent so long being. The abuse in this fic was not sexual in nature, jsyk.

En Promenade by newsbypostcard (series is 86k words)

Author’s Summary: After three months of weekend bar-hopping and a slow process of elimination -- with finding the right bar, that was, and tragically not discovering who Bones was into -- Jim was starting to narrow it down.

A very cute Academy fic that nevertheless deals with a bit of heavy shit for both Jim and Bones. Starts out with Jim bound and determined to befriend Bones by... discovering the perfect bar for them to hang out in. Has a lot of really great exploration of Bones’s character, and he’s written in a really entertaining way.

Future Imperfect by Savoytruffle (50k words)

Author’s Summary: Leonard wins the kid in a hand of poker. A hand of poker he plays in the dirty back room of a dive bar in East Bumfuck, Iowa, two weeks after his humiliating divorce is finalized, and on the sixth day of a bourbon-fueled bender that’s somehow taken him from his high-rise loft in Atlanta to a fleabag motel in the middle of nowhere.

This fic is an Academy fic, but in a pretty dark universe. Maybe not Mirror Universe dark, but it’s one where slavery is practiced on Earth. Jim is, in this fic, Bones’s slave. Not in a sexy way. He’s part of an underclass of people who weren’t designer babies. Bones goes to the Academy and tries to become a Starfleet officer, accompanied by Jim, his newly acquired slave. They grow closer as they deal with their pasts, and I guess I should stop there for fear of spoiling too much. This one talks a lot about childhood sexual abuse, so be warned. The story overall though has a hopeful ending.

Let Me Come Home by yawnralphio (7k words)

Author’s Summary: “Someone asked me what home was and all I could think of were the stars on the tip of your tongue, the flowers sprouting from your mouth, the roots entwined in the gaps between your fingers, the ocean echoing inside of your ribcage.”

For someone who theoretically dislikes modern day AU’s, there are actually a fair few that I really really love, and this is one. Jim and Bones run a travel blog together and journey around the US in a van. It’s a really lovely mix of angst and romance.

The Switch series by Ceres_Libera (series is 269k words)

Author’s Summary (of the first fic in the series): The life and times of Leonard H. McCoy MD/PhD … If Leonard McCoy's life could get any fucking weirder, it would be … Jesus, he didn't even want to think what that could possibly mean, because it's already been too fucking weird to make any kind of rational sense. A Starfleet Academy story, set in the ST:XI universe.

I don’t need any sass, people. I KNOW you’ve all read Switch, and I know you’re all tired of seeing it on rec lists and I don’t care. It’s famous for a reason! It’s not just long, it’s WONDERFUL. The big, epic Academy fic that kinda sets the Academy fic bar. Goes from Jim and Bones meeting all the way through the end of the 09 film. And that’s just the main fic. I really love that both Jim and Bones are depicted as realistically flawed people, especially earlier on in their acquaintance. Neither of them are angst sponges, they’re both just... kinda messed up dudes. But they’re good people who learn to love each other. Also I guess it’s technically slow burn?

The Greater Good by emiliglia (29k words)

Author’s Summary: Doctor Leonard McCoy thinks he's getting by, working as both a surgeon and a researcher at UCSF Medical Center. A chance encounter with Lieutenant Jim Kirk - who's changed since they first met five years before, and not for the better - forces Leonard to face reality about his own situation while trying to keep Jim from heading down the same path.

This is the only fic on here not on Ao3, as far as I can tell. Anyhow it’s modern day AU. Jim and Bones help themselves by helping each other and falling in looooove.

The aftershocks series by canistakahari (series is 30k words)

Author’s Summary: Jim Kirk turns down Pike’s challenge, and doesn’t get on the Starfleet recruiting shuttle. But neither does Leonard McCoy, who’s actually been in Iowa for six months already, doing fuck-all. Becoming drinking buddies seems like a natural progression.Sometimes the path to the stars is just a piece-of-shit dirt road. You know, the kind that’s filled with potholes and surrounded by brambles and conveniently happens to be located in the bottom of a ravine. But every once in a while, when confronted with such a twisted mess of circumstance and cracked foundation, the universe still does its very best to fill in the holes.

I haven’t read this in a long time, but I remember it being really good and kinda mindfucky. Not in a dark or stressful way, though. Jim and Bones don’t join Starfleet at all. I feel I shouldn’t say more because I don’t want to spoil things, but the tags should give you more information if you want some.

i think i’ll keep you (like a secret) by hoosierbitch (3k words)

Author’s Summary: Bones came to Starfleet with a hell of a lot of baggage. Jim came empty handed.

Some good ole Jim angst. Prominently featuring: Tarsus things! Allergic-to-everything Jim! Jim allowing himself to be vulnerable around Bones! All that good stuff. I just love me some vulnerability.

How Whales (Sorta) Brought Jim and Bones Together by highschool-facelesshellion (4k words)

Author’s Summary: For Leonard, first dates are flowers and small, homey restaurants where you talk quietly like you're sharing secrets with your potential girlfriend.They are not supposed to be at a table covered with aquarium maps and aquarium souvenirs. And they are certainly not supposed to be spent with a blond-haired, blue-eyed boy rambling about whales.(Or: Where Leonard is the only person that doesn't think Jim's too crazy for his whale obsession and Jim notices.)

Fairly goofy, slightly cracky remix of The Voyage Home (the one with the whales). It’s just silly and charming and I don’t know why I love the idea of Jim being a whale aficionado, but I really do.

Any Road Will Take You There by shoreleave (63k words)

Author’s Summary: Slow-developing K/M, beginning right after the shuttle ride and showing what happens the first year at the Academy. Told from McCoy's POV.

This fic is verrrrry good. I know I have a lot of Academy fic on here, but please treat yourself and read this one. Shoreleave is really good at both plot and characterization. I really like this fic in part because it explores the root of Jim’s complete lack of trust in authority figures, while also showing just how dangerous that lack of trust can be for him.

Seeing Stars by lindmere (1k words)

Author’s Summary: Inspired by Chris Pine's wig in Bottle Shock. Jim sneaks into Riverside for an old-fashioned Fourth of July.

A very sweet, sort of domestic established relationship fic.

His Eyes are Opened by tresa_cho (21k words)

Author’s Summary: Lt Colonel Leonard McCoy thought his service days were over. After the Great War, he was ready to disappear into the sanctuary of anonymity, but the government had other plans. Strange men whisk him away from his comfortable existence to investigate an airship crash unlike anything the United States had ever seen before. The year is 1947. The location, Roswell, New Mexico.

Despite the summary saying ‘Great War’, this fic is clearly post WWII, so I think that must be a typo. There is a dearth of McKirk fic set in the forties, and hot damn does this fic ever hit the spot if that’s what you’re looking for. Usually fics that are set in modern times or earlier take out all the sci-fi elements of Star Trek, but not this one! Just a very well done fic with a unique premise.

Investigations by AceOfSpades (series is 93k words)

Author’s Summary: The first thing Jim noticed about McCoy, and what started him on this whole messy path, was that McCoy was just a little…off.

GOD DAMN I love this fic. It’s a Doom (2005) fusion, but you don’t need to know anything about Doom to get this fic. It might even help to not know anything about Doom. God knows I don’t and I adore this fic. Academy era, with Jim simultaneously befriending Bones and trying to solve the mystery of this weird Leonard McCoy guy. Theoretically we’re getting a sequel sometime, and it can’t come soon enough in my opinion. Never fear, though, the fic is complete as-is and has lovely closure. Really really really recommended!

The Galactic Adventures of Major Zeph by winterover (14k words)

Author’s Summary: Jim is a comic book nerd who’s finally found his one true sidekick. Leonard is a convention virgin who really needs a drink. There is only one bed left in San Diego.

Academy fic! For some reason I always love fics where Jim is into some kind of craft or art, or is just generally a nerd about something. This fic provides that twice: Jim is a comic book nerd as the summary says, but also really into cosplay. And Bones just happens to look like the sidekick of Jim’s favorite comic book character. Romantic hijinks ensue.

The Man Who Held Up Atlas by thalialunacy (7k words)

Author’s Summary: Five times Leonard McCoy fixed Jim Kirk’s back, and the one time he didn’t have to.

Really really lovely 5 plus 1 fic with reverse chronology. Starts with Jim and Bones as old old men and moves back in time from there, showing little snapshots of their relationship.

and i can lend you broken parts that might fit (like this) by jeyhawk (17k words)

Author’s Summary: Academy Era. First they fall into bed. Then they fall in love.

Funny and sweet. Nothing too heavy, just loads of Jim and Bones being wildly in love with each other. And sexytimes.

#mckirk #fic rec #star trek #aos #my post

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nichester · 4 years

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Ok so I DID end up watching the king: eternal monarch against my better judgement and my feelings ARE as expected pretty mixed so below the cut is a complement sandwich (complement, critiques, complement) about the first 4 episodes. Jsyk, I am not following the plot even slightly so take all criticism in that light haha

First impression—Gorgeous! From the clothes, to the costumes, to the locations, to the actors this is a beautiful show. There were multiple really striking shots, and the bamboo forest in particular is a great choice.

Now that I’ve said some nice things, I’m gonna say some mean things, and there are a couple of elements I’m really struggling with in the king.

it’s very plot-heavy for a show that hasn’t gotten me to invest in the characters yet. This is a personal preference, but I enter a story through the characters first, and the parallel worlds mysteries aren’t really a draw for me if I don’t have characters I care about who will be affected by this plot.

they haven’t given any reason for the lead girl to interact with him? The absence of motivation for her character is a big problem for me four episodes in. Look, she’s a police officer. I used to work as an emt. Believe me, we have all picked up a weirdo who proposes marriage! (I’ve also had plenty of interactions with people who thought they were from another world or able to travel through time and it’s very much something you deal with politely and sensitively on the job and then move on) None of us hang out with with them outside of work! Especially as a woman! The only reason she continues to interact with him is because he’s the male lead, and while thats the case in every drama, it shouldn’t feel like it. In reality, she would have sent him in for a psych eval and moved on. I’m willing to suspend a lot of disbelief in dramaland, but I just think that if you’re going to have your leads start off with one of them disliking/irritated by the other, then you need to put effort into creating a scenario where they are forced to interact despite that dislike. Otherwise the relationship feels false because none of the characters’ stated emotions are reflected in their actions.

On top of this, isn’t the point of this kind of fish-out-of-water story to shake up an otherwise confident and privileged character? But so far the king has had no real moments of vulnerability related to this. His money, his cultural fluency, his intelligence, even his physical strength, are not meaningful challenged in any way during his time in our world. It goes without saying he’s not challenged at home either—and he’s already back there! (Relatedly it’s a steep ask for this show to want me to root for a king over the democratically elected prime minister :/ js.)

This all means that so far none of the likely ships are really working for me. I usually manage to escape the hell that is sls, but I can feel it creeping up on me in this one. He’s got a painful but intriguing backstory, and he’s just so pretty! And, you know, he has an established dynamic with the lead which is a plus.

All that said, I’m gonna keep watching. I’m enjoying the secondary characters, especially at the police station (the newbie is so precious!) and the prime minister. It’s not like I’m not having a good time! But I do feel like I’m skipping along the surface of the story, with nothing drawing me in yet. It remains to be seen if my feelings will change.

#the king: eternal monarch #the king eternal monarch #weekly watchlist #this is a pretty lengthy reaction/review so im not gonna put it with the rest of my weekly round up of shows ive been watching #you get your own post king eternal whatever!#literally nothing ever shows up in tags anymore what is the point of this website #if i cant get strangers on the internet to validate my opinions on a television show then my life has no meaning anymore

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evilkaito · 4 years

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jsyk david suzuki is an ecofascist and says a lot of "humanity is a disease" stuff

is he an outspoken ecofascist or has he said that like once or twice bc theres plenty of people out there who dont rly know any better and while its not acceptable the label ecofascist is a pretty heavy one

#nyaos #Anonymous

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humboldtfog · 4 years

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Years of depression has prepared me very well for the current state of affairs which is weird but whatever here’s a list of my faves on netflix, if I’m missing something let me know cause now’s the time, right?

I'm kinda embarrassed by how long this list is but also kinda like fuck that, there have been very long periods of time where it was either sit and watch shows all day or lie down and stare at the wall in silence all day so I chose the former and it adds up and there's nothing wrong with that.

Glow (Badass ladies learn to wrestle, great 80s aesthetics and grrrrl power.)

Our Planet (Netflix version of Planet Earth, beautiful, cute, terrifying that we aren’t doing more to save us all.)

Bojack Horseman (Hilarious and “deep” critique of LA and celebrity culture for people who don’t care about LA or celebrity culture. Also very funny visual jokes about how if animals were also kinda humans, and lots of great jokes about cliches and tropes, puns, and weirdly rhyming and alliteration? I don’t know how to explain it just watch it.)

Father Brown (BBC, based on mystery novels about a priest who always meddles in police business and solves murders in his small English countryside town.)

Pose (The Ball scene in NY in the 80s, poc queer and trans writers and actors bringing their people’s stories to life. So much joy, so much beauty, but also NYC in the 80s so you will cry.)

Paris is Burning (Documentary made during the Ball scene Pose is based on.)

Sex Education (Such empowering representations of all walks of gender and sexuality, and actually very educational, like I would straight up show this in schools because everyone would be very entertained and would learn a lot more than they teach in a lot of schools.)

What Happened Miss Simone (Documentary about Nina Simone’s life, music and the activism the establishment/ government worked to suppress and used to blacklist her.)

Night on Earth (Low light camera technology has gotten hella good and they’re starting to learn stuff about animals’ behaviors at night that they’ve never been able to study before.)

Call the Midwife (Follows stories from the midwives that worked in the East End of London after the war, based on memoirs. Interesting look at the kind of life of poverty people led before there were many large hospitals or birth control, right as the British were implementing their universal healthcare program.)

The Great British Baking Show (Everyone’s so nice and everything looks so good!)

Atypical (Dramady about a high schooler with autism and his family, very funny and great representations of autism and how to be a good dude.)

Parks and Recreation (Just very funny and everyone knows it. Amazing ensemble cast, and they still keeps in touch through a group chat awww doesn’t that say something!)

Kim’s Convenience (Canadian comedy about family of first and second gen Korean immigrants that’s just a really solid funny modern day sitcom.)

Queer Eye (I feel like if everyone in this world could get a life makeover from these guys we just wouldn’t be here right now.)

Obvious Child (Jenny Slate accidentally gets pregnant and gets an abortion. It’s funny and it’s realistic, we’re not all Juno.)

Maria Bamford: the Special Special Special (Rad lady comedian not afraid to talk about her mental health and lack thereof and very vocal about the stigma surrounding mental health problems and I very much relate to. My favorite standup probably ever. I could make a list just for standup so message me if you’d like more suggestions.)

Monty Python (Flying Circus, movies, doc, ect. “The Beatles of comedy” is the cliche but it's true.)

Easy (Very unconventional non-narrative structure and editing, following random people in Chicago in a very real life feeling way. Different story each episode, but sometimes characters show up briefly in each other’s lives or return for a second episode.)

Everything Sucks! (High school nerds and lesbians and theater geeks in the 90s! I’m so sad this only got one season I rewatched it recently and it’s just so solid.)

She’s Gotta Have It (Revival of Spike Lee’s first movie, black girl magic, art world, gentrified New York, lots of sex.)

The Office (Classic, holds up very well, totally solid throughout, worth a rewatch. Also if you're a fan Jenna Ficher and Angela Davis are doing a rewatch podcast jsyk.)

Billy on the Street (Mindless game show for laughs, amazing gay comedian runs around New York yelling questions at them. I watch this with my dad and he can’t help but snort even when it’s “inappropriate” or “juvenile” so you know it’s good.)

Good Girls (Some lower middle class family ladies that are all about to be broke decide to rob the grocery store one of them works at, but they accidentally cross a gang that stored their cash there, so they gotta pay it back, and of course can’t help but get deeper and deeper into it. Very suspenseful like your heart rate will go up and stay up. )

Arrested Development (It’s just funny, as you've probably heard, but I'm telling you it just really is.)

The Laundromat (Tells the stories of a few of the people involved in the panama papers in different ways, explains in an entertaining way how money laundering works in a way that made it mostly make sense even to me. The rich get richer, and Meryl Streep is here to tell them to fuck off and pay their taxes.)

Russian Doll (She keeps dying and coming back to the same moment over and over and can’t figure out how to stop the cycle or why so kinda sci fi, very suspenseful, big cliff hanger ending, or rather no ending, and just found out season two filming is delayed because virus which is very annoying!!)

Dear White People (Show picking up where the movie left off, after a frat hosts a black face party and the ivy league college is forced to deal with racism.)

Dolly Parton’s Heartstrings (Stories based on Dolly songs. Very Hallmark channel, you will cry.)

Episodes (Show about two British writers making a version of their BBC show for American tv. Kind of meta, very funny, Matt LaBlanc plays himself and it's great.)

Dumplin’ (Fat girl grows up with a beauty pageant winning mom and enters one herself with the help of her late aunt’s Dolly Parton drag queen friends.)

Lunatics (Chris Lilley is the best character actor ever, all his shows are just him playing different parts and you seriously forget it’s all one actor, even when he’s playing teenage girls.)

Jane the Virgin (Prime time soap opera about a girl who is engaged and waiting until marrige and is accidentally inseminated with the only sperm sample of a man who’s had cancer so decides to keep the baby, very heavy on the soap opera cliches in a meta way but also that’s what it is. So good at first but after the first three or so seasons it gets too much tbh though.)

Zumbo’s Just Desserts (Australian Bake show but with just sweet stuff and pressure to be avant garde.)

Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee (Jerry Sienfeld goes out with funny people to coffee and lunch in fancy cars and they have funny conversations.)

One Day at a Time (Very very cheesy laugh track sitcom, like the kind of thing my grandma would watch, but it makes me so happy it’s doing a great job eplaining really woke concepts like queer pronouns and ptsd and addiction and white privilege to people like my grandma!)

Orange is the New Black (Good stories about very diverse characters, I’d say by starting it off about a upper middle class white girl it tricks privileged white people into watching and then encountering the more realistic stories of women who go to prison and how the system treats prisoners. Ending of season two is super solid and you can stop it there, season three is a really great critique of the privatization of prisons. I admit it goes on and on to the point that it’s stressful and after watching it spread out over years I can’t remember/ keep up with all the different story lines, though they’re all good stories to tell.)

Space Jam (Just saw while scrolling for more ideas this was added! One of the greatest sports movies of all time obviously.)

Bonus amazon prime shows, I try to avoid Amazon in general but these are just too good if you know a prime member who you can't convince not to give their money to amazon so they might as well give you their login (like yer dad).

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel (A 1950s New York upper class Jewish house wife gets dumped and starts doing stand up, so funny, great actors, and they seriously transform NY back into another era.)

Good Omens (Mini series based off Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman’s satirical novel about the biblical apocalypse, very funny, very smart, very British, does the book pretty solid justice.)

There are other decent things that aren’t included, I’d say these are solid recs for a general list of genres all over the map without letting it get to a ridiculously unhelpful length. I feel like I’d be good at the “if you like this then you’ll also like…” so let me know if some of these are your favorites too and want personal recs for what to watch next based on a brain instead of an algorithm.

If you want to have a remote date and watch things together on video chat or one of those watch party sites or just tell me what to watch next here’s some stuff on my list I’ve been curious about or not sure about or don’t want to watch alone or have been putting off, and now’s the time right?: Strangers Things, I Am Not Okay With This, Black Panther, The Betty White doc, John Mulaney Snack Lunch Bunch, Dead to Me, The Ballad of Buster Scruggs, A Wrinkle in Time, The Little Prince, Maniac, Wet Hot American Summer reboots, and a bunch of different standup specials from comedians I like.

#netflix #list #best #favorites #self #coronavirus #covid19 #2020

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ilovemygaydad · 5 years

Text

Little Talks

from the friends in dark places au

pairing: remile, background logince, background moxiety

summary: remy andersen may be a stubborn, rude, leather-jacket wearing prick, but... nope, that’s it. that’s all he is.

WARNINGS: angsty mutual pining, teasing, flirting with someone else’s boyfriend (in a teasing manner), self hate, internalized enbyphobia, internalized transphobia, internalized queerphobia, doubting one’s sexuality, anxiety, trying to change for a crush, physical violence, transphobic slur, fighting, broken/bloody nose, small fight scene, doubtfulness, lots of swearing, mentions of wanting to die, manhandling, harassment, making out, kissing, flirting, being flustered, bets, possibly something else

tag list: @hufflepuffgirl01 @cocobearthe4th @cas-is-a-hunter @band-be-boss-blog @theunoriginaldaisy and, by request for remile, @notalwaysthevillian

a/n: jsyk, it’s totally okay to ask for a modified chapter if you need it or if i need to add tags! i get it, and it’s no problem for me to quick edit a chapter or whatever :) also, feel free to send requests or questions that you have!

first of main plot - companions

consider buying me a coffee (please)

Remy dramatically flopped onto the bench at Logan’s table with an equally dramatic huff.

“Remus, why have you suddenly decided to… grace us with your presence?” Logan deadpanned.

“Lo, sweetheart, can’t I just sit with my cousin and his lovely friends every once in a while?”

“No,” Logan said. “You cannot because there is never a time that you interact with me if it isn’t for a favor or to insult me.”

Remy gasped, glancing at the other patrons of the table. The emo one looked confused and borderline terrified, and Remy would feel bad if his problems weren’t more important. “Can y’all believe what he’s saying? I’m hurt, truly.”

“Just say whatever it is that you want to so that we may go back to eating our meals in peace.”

“Fine. I need help wooin’ this absolute doll of a girl, and--”

“Hold up,” Roman interrupted. “I thought you were gay.”

If Remy had rolled his eyes any harder, he might have strained a muscle. “Ro, honey, I’d have to be deader’n dirt if I wasn’t attracted to Emile freaking Picani. Ain’t no sexuality that can trump utter beauty.”

or maybe he wasn't gay maybe he was straight or pan or maybe he only liked emile because sometimes she wanted to use he/him pronouns--

“Okay, fair.”

“So,” Logan started, tilting his head the tiniest bit. “Why’d you come to me for romance advice, of all people?”

“Because you caught yourself a cutie--” Remy winked at Roman over his sunglasses-- “so you’ve obviously got some sort of game.”

Logan blushed slightly. “You do know about the whole fight thing, right?”

Remy rolled his eyes again. “Sugar, I’m not as much of a dumbass as you. I can navigate around any dumb advice you give me.”

“Rem—“

“Please, Logan,” Remy pleaded, gripping his cousin’s shoulders. He hated to have to stoop to begging, but he felt so desperate. “You can’t imagine how badly I want Emile to see me as a worthy partner.”

“Remy, kiddo, you’ve gotta breathe, okay?” Patton coaxed from across the table. “You’re going to work yourself into a panic if you don’t take it easy.”

And Remy knew that it wasn’t a big deal, but he couldn’t shake his doubts.

“I just… Emile is a livin’ blessing, and I’m the equivalent of milk left out on a hot, sunny day. I ain’t got a chance with ‘er if I can’t get a fairy godmother to bippity-boppity-boo me into a respectable young man.”

The emo kid slightly raised his hand, making eye contact with his lunch. “Uh, who’s Emile?”

“Oh my goodness gracious!” Remy exclaimed. “I can’t believe you don’t know who Emile Picani is. She is just the sweetest; let me tell you. She absolutely adores cartoons, and she loves helping others--I swear, that girl is gonna fix the whole world someday. She--oops, they must’ve changed headbands during lunch. They’re right over there. The cutie with the gorgeous brown hair and blue headband.” A dreamy sigh escaped him as he pushed his sunglasses into his hair. “They look good in every outfit they wear, on my honor! They’re wearin’ this Steven Universe skater skirt today, and it shows off their legs in a way that’s got me half a step away from fainting. Honest to god, I can’t believe that they’re still single. They’re absolute perfection.”

“I don’t… You just…” The emo boy trailed off, unable to find his words. “You seem really in love with them. I just don’t see why you think that you don’t have a chance.”

Remy frowned, turning to face the others. “Well, every time they see me walking in their general direction, they turn tail and run the opposite direction like I’m some sorta demon that’s comin’ to reap their soul. On the off chance that they hadn’t fled by the time I can get a word in, they always seem like they’d rather be eatin’ soap. It became real obvious, real fast that they ain’t into me in any way, shape, or form.”

“Well,” Patton said, staring somewhere behind Remy. “They’re coming over right now.”

“What? Shit--”

“Hey, guys!” Emile greeted in their sweet, gentle voice as they walked up to the table. Everyone turned to look at them, save for Remy. “Can I borrow Remy for a bit?”

Remy put on his sweetest, fakest smile and finally looked at Emile. “‘Course, hon. You wanna go somewhere else?”

“Yeah, that’d be great, thanks.” Emile began to walk toward the hall, and Remy quickly got up to follow. He took one last glance toward the table and caught Roman winking at him. God bless that boy’s soul.

They ended up just outside the cafeteria. Remy leaned against the wall, sliding his sunglasses back over his face in the hopes that he’d be less of an idiot with them on, and Emile stood a couple of feet away. They were nervously picking at a loose thread on their sweater, so Remy patiently waited for them to speak. There was no reason for him to make a fool of himself if he didn’t need to.

“Did I do something to upset you?”

Remy was so stunned by the question that he couldn’t even get a word in.

“‘Cause, like, you were staring at me earlier, and I’m probably jumping to conclusions like always, but I’d hate it if I hurt you. That would be a really shi--”

“You’re kiddin’ me, right?”

Emile’s face twisted in confusion. “What? No, of course not.”

“Darlin’, there’s just about nothin’ that you could do to make me mad at you. I was just--” Staring creepily at you because I think you’re the finest thing under the sun. Yeah, Remy. That’d be real cool of you to say-- “I was just starin’ off into space.”

“Oh. Okay.” There was an awkward pause before Emile blurted out, “Cool, well, I’m gonna go now. Bye!”

They were gone in a flash, leaving Remy staring at the space that they’d previously occupied. With a heavy sigh, he exited the school. Lucky him, having a free period after lunch anyway. He could cry in the comfort of his own home.

---

If you had told Remy Andersen a week ago that he’d be wearing a sweatshirt to school, he would have told you, “I’d rather be dead than wear a sweatshirt, sugar.”

Well.

The point still stood because Remy really fucking wanted to die.

And, yes, it was his own choice to completely disregard all of the times that his friends had told him not to change just to impress some boy, but heaven be damned if Remy wasn’t thirsty as hell. There was a cute boy, and Remy was ready and willing to try just about anything to gain the ability to kiss that pretty face.

Read: almost anything.

Remy wanted his leather jacket back, and he wanted his ripped skinny jeans, not the plain blue ones that he’d pulled from the darkest recesses of his wardrobe. He’d had to borrow this baby blue hoodie from Patton because, of course, he owned zero hoodies.

And everything was fucking great because Emile was totally paying attention to him trying to be more approachable.

This was fine. Everything was fucking fine.

---

Remy wore sweatshirts for a whole two days before he caved and went back to his leather jacket. There was exactly zero change in the way that Emile acted, and it fucking sucked. It was pretty obvious that he had no chance in getting Emile’s attention, and there was even less of a chance of actually being able to date them. Or even of being Emile’s friend because the fact still stood that Emile disliked Remy so much that they physically ran away every time he was nearby.

Thus, it was Dramatic Bitch Hours, and Dramatic Bitch Hours meant spending the entirety of lunch outside, brooding in the student courtyard.

Although it was nearing the end of May, it was a rather chilly day, and very few students wanted to be outside in the cold. One might suspect that Remy wouldn’t like the cooler days with him being from the south and all, but he found them rather pleasant for this very reason. Fewer people made it easier to relax and brood in peace. He was the only one in the courtyard, which made everything so nice and peaceful.

Well…

It was peaceful for a few minutes before some idiotic jocks decided to barge in.

“Don’t run away from us you fucking tranny!”

“You can’t waltz around and pretend to be something you aren’t,” a second voice snarled. “We saw you using the men’s bathroom earlier.”

“I’m surprised, seeing as your heads are so far up your asses!” a smaller voice shot back.

A smaller voice that belonged to the one and only Emile Picani.

Shit.

“Don’t fucking talk to us like that!” The group rounded the corner, and Remy could see that it was two jocks (one tall and the other muscular) harassing Emile. It felt like slow motion as he saw Emile’s small body stumble after being pushed by the taller jock.

“Hey!” Remy shouted, launching up from his table and storming over to the group. “Y’all had better knock it off real fast and leave them alone!”

The taller one sneered. “Or what? You’ll hit us with your precious sunglasses?” He took a step forward, and the other jock grabbed Emile from the ground in a tight grip.

“Remy, stop,” they pleaded. “Please, just leave.”

“Yeah, Remy,” mocked the muscular boy, gripping Emile even tighter. “Run away like the coward you are.”

Remy glared at the jock looming over him. “Sorry, doll. I don’t back down so easy.”

There was about a half second of angry silence before the tall one pounced at him. With the grace of many years of training, Remy took advantage of the momentum and threw the jock over his shoulder. The boy let out a heavy wheeze as the air was knocked clean out of his lungs, and Remy turned to face the other bully just in time to see Emile thrown to the ground again. The boy who had been holding them growled, stalking up to Remy and reeling back for a punch.

In a fraction of a second, Remy’s knee jerked up to catch the jock in the stomach. He took advantage of the moment of shock and ran his elbow into his nose. The boy stumbled back, clutching his face. The taller jock, who had recovered from being thrown, ran over to his friend with a gasp.

Remy casually straightened out his jacket, not even slightly winded. “I think it’d be the best for both of y’all if you went to the nurse’s office. That broken nose sure ain’t gonna heal itself, hon.”

The boys began to rush out of the courtyard, but Remy called out to them, “Oh, and I wouldn’t tell anyone what really happened out here.” He smirked. “Wouldn’t want everyone to know that y’all got beat up by the queer kid, now would we?”

Both jocks had the fear of god in their eyes as they nodded and ran into the building. As soon as they were gone, Remy was at Emile’s side.

“Sugar, are you okay?”

Emile nodded slightly as Remy sat down next to them. “Yeah, just startled. Also, how the hell did you do that?”

“I’m a black belt in taekwondo. Ma thought it’d be a good way to get out my destructive energy as a kid, so I ended up getting real invested.” Remy shrugged. He didn’t find it a very interesting part of his history, but it was useful at times.

“Holy shmokes…”

Remy smiled slightly, leaning back on his hands. “Y’know, I’d reckon that this is the longest conversation that we’ve had without you runnin’ off.”

A bright pink blush spread across Emile’s cheeks. “I’m so sorry.”

“‘S all right,” Remy said, waving his hand dismissively. “Ain’t your fault that you don’t like bein’ ‘round me, hon. I don’t really blame ya; I’d prob’ly hate me, too, if I were you.”

“You think I hate you?” Emile’s voice sounded sad and hurt, which didn’t make any goddamn sense.

“Yeah? Sure made it seem like you did.”

“Oh my god,” Emile said. They buried their face in their hands. “God, no, Remy. I don’t hate you at all!”

Remy stared at Emile for a hot second. “If that’s some kind of practical joke, it sure as hell ain’t funny.”

“No, no! It’s for real; I swear. I don’t hate you in the slightest.” Emile peeked out from behind their fingers. “I actually kinda have a crush on you.”

“Holy shit. This can’t possibly be real.” Remy shook his head.

“Trust me, Rem. It definitely is,” Emile said as they slowly crawled into Remy’s lap. It was as if they’d been doing it their whole life. “Is this okay?”

Remy’s mind went haywire at the close proximity to his crush. “Yeah. It’s very much okay, Emile.”

“I don’t think that I’ve ever heard you call me by my real name.” Emile leaned in closer to Remy. Their eyes met, and it was easy to see the flirtatious fire in Emile’s eyes. “I wouldn’t mind hearing you say it again.”

“Gurl, you can’t--it isn’t fair for you to say that kinda stuff and expect me to think properly.”

“Maybe I don’t want you to,” Emile whispered as they finally closed the minuscule gap between their lips.

And wow. Remy had imagined being able to kiss Emile in many daydream sessions, but the real thing was something else entirely. It was soft, and he could taste brown sugar and cinnamon on Emile’s lips, but a warmth had bloomed in his chest unlike anything that he had ever felt before. It took him a second to realize in his romantic haze that he had Emile’s skirt clutched tightly in his hand, but he couldn’t really bring himself to care. Not while he was kissing a literal angel.

All too soon, Emile leaned back from the kiss. Remy pouted, but he wasn’t able to get a complaint out before Emile said, “You look absolutely wrecked right now.”

Suddenly, the heat wasn’t just in his chest. “That… I swear to god, that ain’t fair.”

Emile cocked their head the tiniest bit. “What isn’t fair?”

“No human bein’ should be so perfect. You’ve got the looks--” Remy placed a kiss on their cheek-- “and the personality--” Another kiss to their nose-- “and you’re an amazing flirt.” He pressed a final, quick kiss to Emile’s lips, which made them giggle.

“Shut up! You’ve been my boyfriend for a whole two minutes; let me get used to it before you do sappy stuff!”

Remy’s eyes widened. “I-I’m your boyfriend?”

“Yeah! I mean, unless you don’t want to! I’m not going to force you or anything—“

Emile was cut off by Remy engulfing them in a hug. “Sugar, you’ve got no idea how much I wanna be your boyfriend. I’m just surprised that you wanna court me.”

“What? Why wouldn’t I?”

“Have you not heard a single word I’ve said this whole time? You’re, like, the most incredible person on this planet. It’d be an honor just to be able to call you my friend.”

Emile laughed, leaning their head on their boyfriend’s shoulder. “Since we’re letting out our dirty laundry, I suppose that I should confess that I was worried that you weren’t going to want to date me because you’re gay, and I’m not a guy.”

“Sexuality is fluid. I can like you and still call myself gay, right?” Remy’s voice almost sounded scared—like he was afraid to say something wrong.

“That’s fair.” They felt Remy shift a bit, smiling. “Is it too early to say that I love you?”

“Nah. I love you, too.”

---

“That’ll be ten bucks, Virgil,” Logan said, holding his hand out for the money as he stared out the doors to the courtyard. They had been planning to eat outside to work on a project together, but Virgil had seen their friends sitting on the sidewalk and stopped them before they intruded.

“We don’t even know what happened! This is stupid,” Virgil grumbled as he slammed the money into Logan’s hand.

A wicked smirk spread on Logan’s face. “All’s fair in love and war.”

“I’m gonna fucking tattle on you to Patton, and he’ll kick your ass to next week.”

Terror overshadowed the smugness in Logan’s expression, and he moved to chase after his best friend. “Wait, hold on! We can talk about this!”

#sanders sides fics #remile #remy sanders #emile picani #m writes things #logince #moxiety #virgil sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders

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janiedean · 6 years

Note

(1) Can I just say I hate all this Freddie Mercury biopic wank with a passion? Like, this hellsite went from "Queen is one of those boring 'classic' bands all whites are obsessed with bc they won't even consider new music by diverse artists u.u" to "WWRY is clearly a song about rebellious queer youth, cishets don't touch Queen u.u" after someone pointed out Freddie's ethnicity and sexuality, to "why aren't they making Freddie gay in the biopic!!!11" and... whatever they're whining about now.

(2) And I HATE looking at all this bs and thinking "fake fans", bc I'm pretty damn sure that by most standards, *I* count as a "fake fan", too. I mean, most stuff I know about the band's history is actually stuff about Freddie, thanks to a few documentaries centered around him and my mom, the long-time fan with a big crush on Freddie who introduced me to Queen when I was a kid. Hell, I couldn't even name all their albums or anything needed to be considered a "true fan". But ppl on here... ugh. (3) It's like they're really embarrassed bc they were called out on mistaking "woke" stuff for "unwoke" stuff, and now they have this desperate need to prove their ability to discern wokeness by getting offended about something they don't even care all that much about, as loudly and dramatically as they can.

HAHAHAHAHA.

okay so, tldr: I hate this discourse and I honestly hope that it dies within two weeks out of the biopic for a whole lot of reasons amongst which the ones you said, but like, this discourse actually highlights a shitload of issues with the usual tumblr discourse which I will gladly go into now because I’m fucking tired and this movie isn’t out yet.

now, premise: while I don’t think that true fans are a thing - at most there’s casual fans or in-depth fans but I mean, a fan is a fan so I don’t believe in the *fake* fans thing..... the problem here isn’t that they’re fakes. it’s that they aren’t fans. period.

other premise: from what you’ve said you’re a casual fan which is normal and you DON’T count as fake I mean if you like them and listen to them and know something it’s basically being a casual fan same as I am with idk the rolling stones, I like the famous stuff, I have the fundamental records and I like them when they’re on but that’s it.

but, yours truly is a Not Casual Queen Fan in the sense that a) I got into them when I was seventeen and I’m thirty now so thanks it’s been a while, b) I own all the records, c) I own a decent portion of roger taylor’s/brian may’s solo records (and I have listened to all of them that I couldn’t buy), d) I went to see them live once (k it was with paul rodgers but nvm guys not my fault if I wasn’t born in time for freddie) and I love queen’s music and I’m also fucking cishet and you know what? these people Are Not Fans and they should stop pretending they are and just stop making themselves look like assholes.

SPECIFICALLY:

the movie’s not out yet and I’ve had to see FIFTEEN ‘FRIENDLY REMINDER TO ALL CISHETS THAT FREDDIE MERCURY WAS GAY (at least a couple said he was bi and they were less asshole-ish) AND POC AND IF YOU DON’T KNOW YOU’D BETTER LEARN NOW HAHAHAHA YOU THOUGHT HE WASN’T. spoilers: every fucking casual queen fan who has bothered to buy three records knows that. yes, also the cishets. like, as someone who went from VERY CASUAL (ie: I know three songs) to NOT CASUAL in the span of two months I can 100% assure you that before getting into queen the usual preconceptions are that freddie was gay and that queen = freddie + three other people. the first three things you learn when getting into queen are (more or less in order but it can change) that a) the band was actually brian may + roger taylor first, b) that roger brought freddie in because they knew each other already, c) that mary austin was a fundamental person in freddie’s life and that she was also brian may’s ex and knew him first before they got together, d) the members’s backstories including where freddie was born, so like...... this idea that CASUAL CISHET FANS wouldn’t know that freddie was a) not heterosexual, b) poc is just something a NON-FAN would say because guess what, most queen fans even at a casual level are 100% aware that freddie was a) not heterosexual, b) not ethnical british. and saying that OMG CISHETS DON’T KNOW it’s ridiculous because guess what, everyone knows and if they have no idea they do, though luck, we did;

(spoilers: I also am 99% sure that those ppl have no idea that roger and brian actually sing on the records and composed a shitload of the music and queen =/= ONLY FREDDIE but okay)

they have no idea that rock music in the 70s/80s was not so heteronormative and was not the cishetmalething they think it is. like, please look at led zeppelin (ie THE PEOPLE WITHOUT WHOM YOU WOULDN’T HAVE HEAVY METAL) and tell me they were heteronormative. like, you saw robert plant? yeah, me too. and the thing was that queen were revolutionary in the sense that they brought an operatic/theatrical approach to the music that no one tried before but guess what, the point is that they made it sell. the thing that I would like tumblr Woke People to grasp is that what made queen groundbreaking as far as Wokeness goes is that they managed to sell and become the monster-moneymaking group they were (while keeping things quality) with a frontman who was Not Heterosexual, Did Not Try To Pass For Heterosexual One Day In His Life and Never Shied Away From It. like, idk if people are aware that while the scene was way less heteronormative than they think it still wasn’t the most openly talked about topic around (I mean guys elton john did marry a woman at some point X°DDD), but going around in the seventies flaunting your non-heterosexualness around and selling millions of copies making your stage persona a selling point of your music wasn’t exactly common. like ffs one of the most famous queen songs has a video where for 3/4 of the time they’re in drag and the other part has freddie performing with the royal ballet (and guess what the song was actually written by john deacon and the idea of doing the video in drag was roger taylor’s and none of them as far as we know is Not Heterosexual, but never mind giving the rest of the band some credit when it came to Not Caring About Heteronormativity) and fine, that video was banned/controversial, but it still was a huge british hit and it’s in the top five queen songs Everyone Knows. and tbh I’m terrified of that video being shown in the biopic (which it should since the works was from ‘84 and they stop at ‘85) because I’m 100% sure that those people have no idea it exists and when they find out how long is it gonna take them to decide that IT’S PROBLEMATIC? I mean, Woke Kids on here think the rhps is problematic, I’m shuddering at the thought of what they’d think of the i want to break free video;

actually a lot of us cishet queen fans might have had a wake up call including, er, finding out certain preferences, thanks to either their music or their shows or their videos (*cough* I 100% assure you that watching roger taylor in drag was what made me realize crossdressing was my thing for good like I knew before but I didn’t actually put two and two together until I saw that video and went like ‘............. AH WELL SHIT THEN THAT’S IT FAIR ENOUGH’), and a lot of us cishet queen fans who weren’t, like, strictly playing to heteronormative rules back in the day found a lot to relate to in their music even without being queer ourselves and guess what I’ve never met a single queen *fan* who could give less of a damn about freddie’s ethnicity or orientation (as in: everyone was a-okay with it) regardless of their background. that was what made them groundbreaking and extremely important as well, because they managed to be that kind of record-selling records-breaking band while not shying away from having a Not Heterosexual frontman AND Not Heteronormative Heterosexual Band Members Who Also Didn’t Give Two Fucks About Their Lead Singer’s Sexuality so going like OMG NOW WE’RE GONNA TEACH YOU THAT FREDDIE WASN’T HETEROSEXUAL BECAUSE WE’RE WOKE is ridiculous because dearest susan, we already knew and we already were woke about that and to us he was the frontman of a band we liked for a bunch of reasons;

also I don’t think people realize that freddie was a role model/example for the entire next generation of rock bands frontmen even in genres that had zilch to do with him - I mean guys AXL ROSE had a hero-worship for freddie and sang bohemian rhapsody at the freddie memorial concert WITH ELTON JOHN and grn really aren’t the same exact sphere as queen jsyk, but if you look at axl on stage esp. when he was younger? guys. it’s obvious. like you can see the influence. but lmao, now ALL the very cishet(-ish) singers who OPENLY SAID FREDDIE INFLUENCED THEM DIDN’T KNOW ACCORDING TO TUMBLR DOT COM?

LIKE, fuck’s sake, one of freddie’s major accomplishments in that sense was to ending up being a role model for younger singers in a genre where heteronormativity is way less common than everyone thinks BUT where not many people esp. back in the day would be open about their sexuality because it still was a taboo-ish thing -- like, gender roles were a lot more blurred but you wouldn’t hear many of those people admitting openly they were bi or gay or Not Heterosexual and the entirety of the rock scene especially mainstream but also not was entirely fucking aware of it, do these people think THE FANS wouldn’t?

also, we will rock you was WRITTEN BY BRIAN MAY AND IT WAS ABOUT A FUCKING ENCORE WHERE THE FANS SURPRISED THEM AT ONE SHOW IN LIKE MID-SEVENTIES which already shows that They Know Nothing because if they think freddie wrote all the queen songs then it’s already obvious they have no fucking clue about how queen worked as a band because all the members contributed something (guys john deacon wrote at least two of their major hits, roger taylor sang on all the records along with brian may and if you hear the back harmonies on ‘39 he goes way higher than freddie and a part in seaside rendezvous has both him and freddie mimicking other instruments with their voice and you wouldn’t know if no one told you first, brian may wrote a SHITLOAD of music for queen and it was an all-four effort, not just freddie + three other generic british dudes for fuck’s sake) so like, anyone saying that is already giving ample proof that they have no idea;

now of course you can interpret it as whatever the hell you want, but assuming that all of queen’s music that might relate to queer issues was written by freddie ABOUT QUEER ISSUES (this when freddie’s main topic of interest was... not really discussing his sexuality especially in the seventies like again, I want to break free is one of the queen to-go songs everyone brings up when it comes to that topic and IT WAS WRITTEN BY SOMEONE ELSE and the video concept was THANKS TO SOMEONE ELSE) just shows that a) you don’t know shit about the band’s history, b) you’re not a fan because you didn’t even bother to look it up on wiki, c) you’re trying to look woke at all costs;

they have NO FUCKING CLUE that most people in the 70s/80s/90s in the business were NOT politically correct according to their standards LIKE LITERALLY NO ONE WAS;

goes unsaid they probably haven’t listened to one full queen album from beginning to end not even the greatest hits.

tldr: I hate that they don’t seem to realize that things existed before 2005 and that music in the 70s/80s COULD and WAS diverse and *woke* already before they were even born, I hate that they decided that ALL CISHETS DIDN’T KNOW when thank you I think even my damned parents know and they don’t listen to rock music, I hate that they decided that queen APPARENTLY DIDN’T HAVE A FANBASE BEFORE THEM (lol) or that that fanbase didn’t understand them (triple-lol), I hate that they’re reducing freddie to his sexuality when he didn’t want that in the first place, I hate that they’re falling into THE MAIN MISCONCEPTION AROUND ABOUT THIS BAND as in THAT IT WAS FREDDIE + THREE OTHER PEOPLE and not an all-around group effort of people who were friends and deeply loved/respected each other and put the same share of work into it, I hate that they moment they see the movie and are introduced to the actual music/the actual story they’ll MOST LIKELY find problematic things to wank about because like hell they wouldn’t and I hate that they’re basically pretending to give a fuck about a band that I love and have loved dearly in a very non-casual way when they actually fucking don’t.

fucking hell please never let anyone make a biopic about either springsteen or led zeppelin or other people I actually like because this is bad enough, I don’t even want to think of what tumblr ppl would say if they knew anything about any rock artist of medium-large fame back in the day. peace.

#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #queen for ts #let's see how fast wank arrives #I HOPE IT DOESN'T #god i hate this discourse BURN IT #lgbt for ts #haljathefangirlcat #ask post

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