#this might get awkward

[leviabeat]

Just found out my brother and his wife are going to the same Volbeat concert as me

#this might get awkward #leviathan opens her mouth #volbeat

[wardingshout]

Zelda goes mushroom girl

#tloz #a link to the past #zelda #link #my art #I was happy with that first one but for some reason decided it still needed a companion piece so I spent way too long on that second one... #I don't think there was any time during the progress where I was happy with it but hfduhdfu at least I got to Attempt drawing moss hell yea #I also at some point sat in Pyu's art stream and said I enjoy drawing legs As I was being murdered by the infamously impossibe (imo) squat. #it's ok I had fun !! but I need to learn how to let doodles be doodles or I'll never finish stuff at this rate dfsuhfd #if everything in my tloz tag looks like it was drawn by different people uuuh 2023 was art crisis year ngl...... #I'm falling back into my old ways rn though #anyway I think about these two a lot I think they're both stone faced and awkward ppl in different ways but they try rly hard to be friends #like I like to think it starts out so incredibly awkward and a bit sad bc they keep stepping over each other's toes accidentally the harder #they try but idk they find comfy middle ground idk in my brain they have a very interesting friendship I wanna get around to drawing it #in a proper way that might make sense.... #if I don't write 200 tags I will die maybe it's bc I grew up on dA or smth #and yes I know how to find 1 (one) type of mushroom /I/ am not mushroom girl unfortunately smh

[malerek]

Under Radar YA 2022 #8 | 9 YA books for every taste 📚

Under Radar YA 2022 #8 | 9 YA books for every taste 📚 #BookBlogger #Booktwt #BookTwitter #UnderRadarYA

Under the Radar YA is a Sunday feature of little-known YA books turning one year. How does this work? 📚 The books featured on this little-known YA books list have less than 150 reviews on Goodreads and were published one year ago this week.📚 There are no sequels featured, only standalones and first books in a series.📚 The list used for reference is YA Novels of 2022.📚 I’m not recommending any…

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#A Night to Die For #Every Variable of Us #Growing Up in Flames #In Hiding we Seek #Man Down #That Thing I Did #The LeNoir Legacy #This Might Get Awkward #Turning #under radar ya #urya 2022

[ryllen]

x

#reading this meme gives me comfort #twisted wonderland #twst #this is just what i think #who would u swap and where #honestly jack is probably the first and second tier once he gets comfortable with you #like it is so kind and warm it actually makes u forget ur woes #kalim and ace are just the tight huggers that's why they are on the top list #they squish u and that serotonin out #u're just little pouch of serotonin in their hands #trey is between giving u awkward back pat or hugging you #but i like to think even tho he's just pretending his hug is very comforting #deuce is just bewildered confused and flustered that's why he doesn't return the hug immediately #but he sure wouldn't want to let go afterwards #cater might seem like he would give a good hug but i imagine his true self be like o . o and then switch to ^ - ^ immediately after #vil is just a kind person in my eyes #he is mature and calm and nurturing if he wants to #i alter the meme wording by a bit to fit my perception more #if u put the birthday boy icons together it makes a heart omg #ruggie is honestly confusing me #he would probably only hug wholeheartedly if money is on the line #but i think he hugs his family and the kids at the slum very lovingly #idia is probably between the third and fourth tier but maybe he leans more towards hugging back than patting on the back #patting in the back is probably too cool for him #floyd'd examine u first and giving the how dare u touch me look menancingly but then be like ehe bcs it's little shrimpy i'll forgive u~

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Clown to Equine communication failed; They are separate species.

[First] Prev <--> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #season 1 #bonus comic #wei wuxian #little apple #lan jingyi #lan sizhui #This bonus comic is for all my fellow little apple lovers #she doesn't show up for quite a while after this so I need to wring out every bit of screen time for her #That's what feminism is about. Equine visibility. #Women need to remain mysterious + unknowable + untethered by rules #Women need to canter across the plains and sleep standing up #Women need to be hand fed apple slices 4 times a day #joking aside I do love the co-chaos of lil apple and wwx #though the new duo dynamic that follows (with LWJ and WWX getting way more time together) its *obviously* iconic #god...to be two cultivation partners following directions from a severed arm... #anyhow. I think this might be one of the jokes that is only funny to me #my realism studies are still in that uncanny/awkward phase but I love the 'detailed version of a very stylized character' visual gag a lot #Taps my blog name again. Don't forget the name on the tin #oh wait lwj should be in this scene too...let's retcon it and say he's bending down to pet his bunnies goodbye

[transvampireboyfriend]

Here's a little snippet from a tattoo shop/bakery au that i got kinda stuck on and i dont know if ill ever finish.

some context: Chrissy and Eddie are best friends that live in different states, Eds is taking two weeks off work for Chris' visit, he won't be at his tattoo shop which means he won't see the cute baker from next door

Chrissy's in the middle of answering and he's stretching his arms above his head when they hear the front door opening and the little bell above it chiming.

Eddie left the sign up front switched to "CLOSED", which can only mean-

"Eds?" Steve calls into the studio

Eddie immediately gets up from his seat and goes to meet him at the lobby, missing Chrissy's surprised look.

"Hiya, Stevie." he greets, bumping his knuckles against the front counter where Steve is standing just to the side of it.

He's secretly been hoping Steve would stop by just so he could see him. Just so he could hear his voice one last time before he has to go on for days without it.

Steve looks good too, in a plain white shirt, his blue apron and the absolute best pair of lightwash jeans in the whole entire world (if you're asking Eddie).

"I thought I saw you come in" Steve says, "You've been here for hours and you didn't come by to get breakfast, so i brought you this" he lifts the tray in his hands.

There's a mug with coffee, several sugar packets and two chocolate croissants.

"Aw, Steve, you didn't have to" Eddie says, genuinely touched. His heart flutters even though this is typical of Steve. He's just the sweetest.

"Oh, stop it," Steve protests, sounding bashful "these are from yesterday, I can't sell them" he says, placing the tray on the counter. A blush colors his cheeks and Eddie smiles, he looks so pretty.

Eddie knows by now how a pastry looks when it's fresh. He can't be fooled anymore.

It's been so long of them doing this dance though, and Eddie knows if he mentions it Steve will just get embarrassed, so he keeps his mouth shut about it.

"Well, they look really good." Eddie says instead "Thank you, sweetheart" he adds softly, his eyes drawn to the pink blooming on Steve's cheeks and focusing on the flour smeared across Steve's nose. He wants to kiss it and get flour all over his lips.

Eddie leans towards the tray and breaks away a piece of croissant, taking a bite.

Yep. Either Steve made these this morning or he's got magic abilities.

" 'M sure gonna miss these" Eddie says around his mouthful, gesturing with the bit of pastry still in his hand.

"Ugh, don't remind me," Steve groans "the shop already feels dull today"

Eddie laughs softly "You flatterer" he accuses

"Just trying to get you to visit" Steve defends, leaning against the counter and into Eddie's personal space to tap the rim of Eddie's reading glasses.

"Like I could stay away from your shop" Eddie says, tries his best not to sound breathless. He thinks he fails, and he must be blushing too, judging by how Steve's eyes are roaming his face.

"Good. Cause we need the business this month" Steve jokes.

That makes Eddie snort and laugh, Steve's shop is filled to the brim with costumers at least twice a day, five days a week.

Steve smiles at him again and then he peers around Eddie.

"Oh, hi!" Steve greets, straightens up and waves a little.

Eddie turns to see Chrissy leaning against the lobby partition, observing with her arms crossed.

Fuck.

"Chriiisssyyyy!" Eddie draws, and she narrows her eyes suspiciously "C'mere!" Eddie soldiers on,

Chrissy eyes him warily but walks to the counter and smiles sweetly at Steve, "Hi!" she greets "I'm Chrissy."

Steve's eyes widen "Of course! Eddie was picking you up today! I'm Steve, it's nice meeting you!"

He's such an angel, Eddie wants to cry.

"Likewise, Steve. I'm so sorry, I don't think Eddie's mentioned you yet" Chris says, but directs it to Eddie, glaring at him.

Eddie's about to answer, offended, but gets stuck on Steve's crestfallen expression for a split second and then Steve beats him to it.

"Oh, it's okay" Steve says, his smile reappearing, "I own the bakery next door" he supplies.

"He brought croissants!" Eddie tries to redirect "The best croissants in the state I'd say" he offers, succeeding in lightening Steve's mood again, judging by the twinkle in his eye.

Satisfied, Eddie asks Chris "D'you want one?"

Chrissy looks at him weird but mutters "sure" and grabs the one still whole.

"Well!" Steve exclaims, softly clapping his hands against his sides,

"I was just dropping these by, I won't take up any more of your time." Steve says "Chrissy it was really nice meeting you, I hope you have a great time in our town."

He turns to Eddie then and reaches out to squeeze his arm "And Eds, I hope you get lots of rest during your break. And visit us." he adds, moving his hand up to softly pull on a stray bit of hair that fell off Eddie's bun "The place won't be the same without you"

Eddie deflects so he doesn't melt under his gaze.

"I'm not dying, Stevie." he says, grabbing him by the shoulders and bodily turning him around as Steve softly laughs.

Judging by how his own cheeks are burning, Eddie's sure that he's the exact shade of a ripe tomato.

"I'll be back before you know it." Eddie adds, and with that, he gets Steve out the door.

Steve turns to say "You better" to Eddie. And once again, he peers around him to wave his fingers at Chrissy "Bye!" he says.

Sweetheart.

Eddie forces himself to not watch him walk the few steps between their shops.

When he turns back to his best friend he's relieved to see she's not glaring at him anymore.

She's got chocolate in the corner of her mouth and she's nodding.

"These are really good" Chrissy says, lulling Eddie into a false sense of safety.

He walks towards her to pick up and continue eating his own croissant, but as soon as he's within reach, Chris smacks the back of her hand against his bicep.

"OW!" Eddie protests, leaning against the counter and rubbing his arm.

She's been an athlete ever since they were in middle school together and she's never pulled her punches with him, it's a big part of why he loves her so much.

"You never told me you had a boyfriend!" she accuses, her mouth still full.

#''here's a lil snippet'' i say‚ as i hand you one thousand words 😬 #steddie #steveddie #steddie headcanon #so. i have a clear outline for this one but somehow it just feels... awkward? idk im not sure whats missing #i think part of it is I keep second guessing Chris and Robin on it. I might have to write them separately for a bit to get the hang of em #before coming back to this #anyways. as always this might be #ooc #so. watch out. lol #stranger things #.

[bericas]

isaac & scott / mason & theo | sometimes all i think about is you

#twedit #twvid #scisaac #mason x theo #twrarepair #back on my scisaac masontheo parallel bullshit btw #back on my masontheo is just scisaac if they were True enemies to lovers bullshit. btw. if anyone was wondering. #like of course scisaac and masontheo get paintaking scenes. its enemies to lovers. ofc mason calls theo a bitch its FULL enemies to lovers #for clarity the hands at the rave and the masontheo hug r parallels to ME bc its touch with an excuse for it #scisaac can brush hands when theyre holding a needle between them and theo can hug mason when its a means to an end #the rest i feel r fairly straightforward but i wanted to share the vision for that one #mason hewitt #theo raeken #scott mccall #isaac lahey #tw #oh also the last shot is the last shot of isaac and theo respectively. if that wasnt clear. #like how isaac and theo both nebulously sort of Gone from beacon hills #and the theo shot also to me looks like footage from The masontheo ep 618. btw. which just brings me joy #actually i have more to say. hi. masontheo r just so. #you know how isaac kind of has. he has the awkward tenderness of someone who has never been loved and is forced to improvise #theo doesnt even have THAT!!!! scott holds out a hand and isaac takes it with an awkward fervor #mason keeps his hands to himself because he doesn't trust what theo might do with it and theo can only help when its helping himself #bc the tenderness will be TOO AWKWARD. so isaac says he wont leave without scott and theo says we need to find him so i cant leave you #so isaac grabs scott because scott makes him feel safe and theo can only grab mason when its part of a script bc thats how he feels safe #HELLO. IS THIS THING ON. DO U GUYS HEAR ME. SCISAAC IF THEY WERE TRUE ENEMIES TO LOVERS!!!!

[oceanwithouthermoon]

ive never liked powerless saiki aus because the entire conclusion of the series is him accepting his powers as being a part of him that he cant change so like.. in aus where the power remover works, half of his development is erased..

if he had been "powerless" for longer, we wouldve gotten to see him realize this himself and im genuinely sad that we didnt.. we got to see him realize that being powerless wasnt the change he wished it would be and that its something he cant change, but its literally over a two day long period and we miss out on sooo much potential development..

and then in aus where hes born powerless, people think he would have the exact personality and development that he THOUGHT he would if he got rid of/didnt have his powers, like NO ? "without powers he would be another satou-" NO he would be a shy, borderline flamboyant, weird, awkward, genius LOSER.

he would have a more normal relationship with his brother (still probably competitive but in a way more average sibling way and kusuke wouldnt have had the motivation to become so murderous) and he would probably be even more friendless but with less trauma.. he may or may not have ever befriended akechi at all, and the classroom incident wouldnt have happened.. even some of his current friends might not be around if not for coincidences due to his powers or direct involvement from his powers.. (nendo and kaido would for sure still be there though, but this only ensures the idea that he would be the biggest fcking loser ever)

he would still be saiki, but. his powers are a key part of him. he would be totally different without them, but NOT in the way he thinks he would..

#also realistically he would be just as much of a stubborn asshole tsundere without his powers cmon #like yea his anxiety might present itself more as shyness than it does in canon him #but hes still an awkward stubborn asshole tsundere like thats just who the guy is #hes extra shy and maybe extra cute without his abilities to make people not find him cute #and is also like extremely ditzy and clumsy like he is in canon but its more visible to people because he doesnt have the powers to hide it #idk the point is his little quirks he thinks he wouldnt have would still be there but he wouldnt have the same faux justifications for them #need canon saiki to see an alternate universe him where he was born powerless #and hes like 'wow im going to see my ideal average me!' #and then au him is some super quirky ditzy clumsy kid with severe anxiety and also dysphoria #and he doesnt have powers to avoid being bullied like we see him do multiple times #this guy doesnt realize he will always be a loser no matter what #he loses key parts of himself and doesnt even realize that a lot of the parts left behind are still parts of himself that he hates #i know a lot of people think he would be much less jaded powerless which i get but #a lot of aspects of his personality that have less to do with his powers are a lot of the parts that he doesnt like and gets made fun of fo #so he would probably only be slightly less jaded and his awkwardness would just weigh it out a little more #though its hard to pinpoint exactly which aspects of him are only due to his powers #a lot of them are but i personally think those specific key personality traits would remain #anyway i would love to see what his relationship with his family would be like if he was born powerless #and i want to know who his friends would be #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k. #saiki kusuo #meows post

[t4t4t]

Hi I got 84 in the last two weeks, starting to run out of food money. Absolutely no gas money to get anywhere but yknow. Maybe the temp agency I'm talking to will give me some tolerable job tomorrow and I can ask a bus driver to let me on for free. ("Not my fault if you get a ticket." has been a common response.)

venmo: @nora-esther-rose

paypal.me/NoraEstherRose

#im lucky two disabled women who dont trust me let c use their kitchen to cook for me even if its kinda awkward #the tip i got to split the ebt accounts kinda helped in giving us more money but it made C very upset bc they made her reapply for health #insurance suddenly which we didnt expect #but ive been using some of my account on her and mine ran out but she should still have some more on hers #electrolysis is keeping me going. C might get facial surgery before the end of the year #we both should get grs next year so thats def smth close to look forward to regardless of whether i get any jobs or any donations #ill cope regardless

[spacecasehobbit]

Y'know what I've realized I'd like to see more often? Zuko befriending the Gaang while still dealing with the fact that his instinctive response to insecurity or fear is to get defensively angry and snappy. Less of Zuko being a quiet mouse who flinches away from any hint of aggression from the others, and more of Zuko who does his best to reign in his temper and then flinches away from his own defensively snappy remarks or the instinct to firebend out his frustrations. More of Zuko who has let go of the bulk of his anger and is doing his best to lean in to his mother's and his uncle's lessons on compassion and empathy, but who is also still in the process of unlearning his years of reliance on anger as his go-to method of covering up any insecurity or "weak" spot around other people.

#atla #zuko #zuko and the gaang #he deserves to be a complicated person #with complex emotions and trauma responses #and also get friends who learn how to understand him #more of zuko and the gaang both learning how to communicate with each other #without triggering the other's fear/defensive instincts and causing unintentional harm on both sides #zuko is an awkward turtleduck #but even a turtleduck might snap at you if it feels threatened

[confettifluff]

entry #84 my beloved

#marble hornets #slenderman #slenderverse #alex kralie #anyways i love this entry so much #might literally be my favorite #it’s so awkward and cute idk #there’s just so many little details that i love about it #like tim being bored as hell and wandering around in the back #the idea that tim grew his sideburns out JUST to be in marble hornets and then i guess liked them so much he kept them for years after #the best part is tim and brian getting dinner after this #edit #tim wright #brian thomas

[heresronnie21]

Guess I have to get out all my three days in the infirmary thoughts before the sun and the star comes out huh

#u might have to turn up brightness to see this properly btw #solangelo #will solace #nico di angelo #pjo hoo toa #trials of apollo #the sun and the star #look at them being awkward starting to get crushes #I am playing with fictional characters like barbie dolls instead of thinking about the cost of living crisis why do you ask #haha bills #we’re gonna all ignore my inability to be consistent right? rIGHT?

[manasurge]

Got Mourynn's first fullbody ref done! (I mean first as in chronologically). Not much to say here, just getting some early year fullbody refs done so I can have them to start on some scenes and lore stuff (just gotta finish her Orchid outfit next since that's her main Sapling outfit before she makes her own custom one). I'm also not used to drawing this small so I messed up the face a bit, on the side there, but oh well.

Below the cut is just the line art and the transparent that I'm hoping will work properly on her Hero Panel profile on Toyhouse:

#Mourynn #Mourynn art #sylvari #sylvari OC #gw2 #gw2 OC #gw2 fan submission #the side of her face still bothers the hell out of me; I am so used to drawing on a larger scale and might have to again to avoid this #ugh it looks so awkward and bad; but oh well. Not much I can do about it now. #also I know all i've really been doing lately is refs but #i'll chip away at them slowly. I'm just really self conscious about things I guess lasjkdf #I just kinda have no choice since I can't properly make her in game klasjdf #but I wanna get to actual lore stuff soon so hopefully I can make that happen soon too #I'm also updating her other look to add the Orchid wings back onto it once I get to her custom outfit #I also wanna update that one a bit anyways (I know it'll be the 3rd time of me updating it - #- but these will be my solid refs bc I'll be using them for Toyhouse (just gotta check the sizing). I'll update that a bit later lol.

[wistaliia]

studying how to draw cove

#olba #our life fanart #cove holden #its hard to draw him for some reason so i decided to draw a bunch of coves until i could do it #idk if ive succeeded yet but im getting better #1st pic is meant to go with that one of jamie pouring water on themself by accident #2nd pic is awkward teenager + how he might look growing out his hair btw step 3 and 4 #coves hair confused me until i realized its not that different from mine??? which is kind of embarrassing actually #so i drew cove with my haircut just for funsies #he doesnt seem to like it tho lol #my art

[k-yujin]

read the tags !! // officially quit

#⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ​⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ #ok first of all why am i writing in tags you may ask #well i find it less awkward to express in my tags rather in the actual post it self since im one hell of an awkward piece of shit hihi #ANYWAY TO THE TOPIC OF ME QUITING #this has been very long due #like i mean everyone has to have seen it coming #specially since i dont post as frequently and j lost most of my motivation #one. because school is my current priority (teachers pet ang peg HAHAH CHARIZ) #two. is my personal life !!! i’ve been vry vry busy keeping up with irl frends and also my family #but the main reason had to be my lack of motivation as in its non existent #next topic !!! #i will be deleting most of my asks and random posts soem of which are memorable to me will be rbloged to @diorasz my personal acc ! #ah and yes will i be coming back? #probably will be lurking time to time but who knows i might actually come back on joshuas bday solely to post a joshua mb HAHAHAHA #ilovemyman frr #I WAS SUPPOSED TO POST THIS ON THE DAY JOSHUA ACTUALLY POSTED ON HIS IG #ok im getting sooooo off topic #but like hooray my last theme is actually jjong toram HAHAH #i actually quited before november like the end of oct but i was too lazy to make a post about it hehehe #but luvi knew ofc :> #anyway if were close moots frel free to add me in discord not like im actually really active #@stariaz. 🤓 #who knows i might actually take this back if suddenly the little devil inside me decides to revive itself #anyway this is user k-yujin offically(?) signing off 🤓🤓 #ALSOOO DOESNT MEAN I QUITED PPLCAN USE MY STUFF W/O GIVING CREDS !!! (ehem ehem my dividers 👁) #please give creds or i will literally come alive #i still have someone who acts as my eyes here even though j wont post no more #guys i have to wake up at 5 am gud night 🤩 #also i cut my hair 😶 #thabks for 3.4k though 🫵🫵

[the-cookie-of-doom]

My entire day is just. Studying child development. And I don't like it (it's complicated) but it's making me really want to write a kid!fic?

Look, watching that one episode of Ingredients Did Something To Me, okay??

After some youthful indiscretions when he's a teenager, Kim get's a girl pregnant. Korn finds out and makes the problem go away. Kim might not find out at all, until years later, when the girl - now a woman - presents him with a toddler and tells him it's his. And Kim is shocked to hell, but if nothing else, he's loyal to his family, and holy shit this child is his family.

Or maybe Korn deals with the problem in a different way. He's not averse to raising bodyguards, Kim says as much himself. He could easily take care of the mother (either paying her off, attic-wifing her, or killing her), with the intention of raising his grandson to be the next heir after Kinn. He knows the chances of getting a child out of Kinn are slim to none. Now he won't have to worry about that. He has a grandchild that he can raise in his own image, in secret.

This is going to get long so I'm going to continue under a cut

However it happens, Kim eventually finds out, and like hell he's going to let anyone keep him from his child. It will take him a while to get used to the idea, to lean into fatherhood, but he's not going to let his own father raise his child to be a killer. Kim sees a chance to break his generational trauma and he takes it with both hands and runs.

Kim has no idea how to be a father. He didn't have a good role model. He know show he's raised, and he knows he won't be the same, so he just. Tries to do the opposite of whatever he went through as a kid. (He's probably the overly-permissive type, but that won't be a problem until later.)

Kim also doesn't have time to be a father. He's in his last year of university, he has a career to manage. Korn of course offers to help - with Kinn running the family now, he can play the part of doting grandpa, but Kim refuses. Hires a nanny (maybe the one that took care of him as a child, the only one he trusts with his own) to help him figure this all out.

The official story, as far as WiK goes, to protect his clean image, is that the toddler is his baby brother. WiK is seen as the sweet, doting older brother when they're seen in public together (which he tries to make sure isn't often, but he's not going to raise his kid in a box, fuck that). It melts the hearts of all his fans, and no one knows he was a teen parent, a terrible role model, someone to scorn.

At some point in their interactions, Kim lets it slip that he has two brothers, and Chay is confused. He knows about the toddler, but Kim mentioned two older brothers? So doesn't that mean he has three?

Eventually Kim introduces Chay to his kid, and Chay isn't stupid. He was raised by his own brother, he knows what that looks like, and it's not what he sees now. His suspicions are confirmed the first time Kim lets him into his apartment. He tries to hide all of the baby things, but Chay snoops a little bit. Finds a child's room behind a door that should have been locked. He confronts Kim, very gently, with the truth. He doesn't judge. He sad that Kim feels the need to hide, even from him, but he understands.

He also thinks the image of Kim with his son is so much cuter than the idea of him with a baby brother.

Kim lets himself be a little reckless, lets Chay spend more time with him and his son, and it hurts how easily Chay takes to him. Like they're a little family of their own. But it's not real.

The first time Kim lets - no, specifically asks - Chay to babysit, because he has no one else, his nanny is sick, and there's no one else he trusts with his son (which is a shock for both of them on it's own), leads to a dramatic shift in their relationship. Kim can't keep pretending this is just a friendship of convenience. He trusts Chay, maybe more than he should, but he can't deny it.

It's going to make the breakup so much harder, because his son is old enough to love Chay, to miss him, to ask where he is when he stops coming over, and Kim doesn't have a good enough answer. Is barely holding himself together, without the added pain of consoling his heartbroken child, crying for Chay to come home while Kim has to keep himself from doing the same.

TBH, the kid is probably how they reconcile. Next time SomethingTM happens and Kim doesn't have anyone to watch him, his first instinct is to call Chay. But he's not allowed to do that anymore. So he drops the boy off with Uncle Tankhun (and is barely able to make him leave that horrible house with his child inside, but Khun is fierce, he'll protect him) and at some point Chay comes to see Khun, and finds him playing with the kid who missed Chay so much, and he knows he should leave, but when he tries the kid cries until he throws up (it's gross, but it's also sweet, but it's also so, so heartbreaking) and Chay just. Can't. Kim might hate him for it, but he can't break that little baby's heart all over again.

After, both Tankhun and the kid demand regular visits. (Khun knows exactly what he's doing. Yeah he loves his nephew, the kid is in that excited dress-up stage and lets Khun treat him like a little doll, but he also thinks Kim is an idiot and needs to start talking to Chay again, and if this is what happens, then so be it).

Little kiddo excited tells Chay about anything and everything, and then does the same to Kim, telling him about his day, all the fun things he did with Uncle Khun and Uncle Chay, and. It hurts. Kim was not at all prepared for how much it hurts.

It continues this way for a while, with the kid an unintentional carrier pigeon between Kim and Chay, sharing aspects of their lives to each other. They never cross paths because Chay always makes sure he's not there when Kim drops him off or picks him up.

Until one day he is. Kim was late (his latest mission was particularly bloody, he had to take extra time to get himself cleaned up and put back together, he won't let his son be exposed to this part of his life) and his son is inconsolable. Chay is trying his best. Just got him to sleep in his lap when Kim finally drags himself, looking fierce until his eyes fall on his son in the arms of the man he loves, and he softens, and Chay sees it, and. They really need to talk.

But kiddo is still sleeping, and Kim doesn't want to wake him up just yet, so he just. Sits down. Looking at him because he can't look at Chay, and Chay tells him how worried kiddo was (doesn't say how worried he was, too), and how he's been fussy all night. Kim lets it slip how much kiddo missed Chay/looks forward to seeing him now (doesn't say how much he missed Chay, and always hopes for a glimpse of him, always disappointed when he isn't there)

They have a lot to work through, but it's impossible to fight with the kiddo sleeping in Chay's lap, so they're forced to be adults about it. Talking quietly, with Kim admitting to things he never thought he'd be able to say out loud. Does say how much he missed Chay, and how he never should have left Chay alone, and how he never should have let Chay think he never loved him, because he did, so much he saw a future with Chay that scared him, and he ran, because he couldn't bear it if Chay left him first, better to break his own heart

Chay forgives him. They don't get together immediately because forgiveness isn't the same as acceptance, and they still have things they need to work through. But he stops avoiding Kim, and sometimes Kim calls him instead of Khun when he needs an impromptu baby sitter, and slowly, that little family that Kim never let himself dream about starts to take form in front of his eyes, and he wonders how he could have ever let himself run away from this.

#cookie speaks #cookie writes #kimchay #kid!fic #Porsche becomes the MOST doting uncle as soon as Chay gives the all clear #Kinn kind of avoids the kiddo bc he has no idea what to do with kids and also doesn't know if Kim would approve? #their relationship is still strained #and kinn is awkward #but oh boy Porsche is a MONSTER #he's going to spoil that boy rotten #Chay is going to give him so much hell for it #but he gets it #Porsche couldn't afford to spoil him when they were growing up (even though he always tried) #i just #i Do Not want kids but I have FEELS okay #this is going to be the most loved child in the world #surrounded by incredibly traumatized and love-starved adults that will do anything and everything #to make sure he has the best life possible #i might write this #new comfort fic alert