#this is also my first pesach without my dad soon and we celebrated it together every year bc it was our thing so im preparing for that blow

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

my teachers,,, frustrate me. they were v nice when i sent out the email and in telling me to take it easy n im thankful for that but also.. it has been three weeks and now they’re talkin to me about finishing all the stuff i missed and gettin stuff done as if im fine,,, jokes on them i was in shock for like 2 weeks and it is only now wearing off bit by bit this is not an uphill experience rn

#dont rb #grieving experience my detested #some days i am. fine #some days i can’t get out of bed #i have a really hard time falling and staying asleep which Fuckin Sucks #one night i slept 12 hours and last night i was sobbing in my mum’s arms at 1 am #Shit Is WildTM #one of my teachers was like ‘hey i know i said take your time but also u gotta take that missed test next week’ #which. why do they think im able to study. i haven’t washed my hair in two weeks why tf do they think i can focus #StressTM #ive also been raised jewish and am jewish but never had the actual bat mitzvah ceremony bc we moved so much all got away from us #so my dad and i were starting on that with the rabbi before he went to hospital and now I’m just. hm #i have a lot of people offering to help which is nice but i really wanna do it with my uncle (which is what I’m doing) but it’s hard #bc he lives in delaware. so that’s added stress rn. id honestly like to focus on that more but i can’t bc of school #this is also my first pesach without my dad soon and we celebrated it together every year bc it was our thing so im preparing for that blow #yea. hard times. not havin too much fun being the only jew in the house #death tw #personal #vent tw #rant tw