#this is a weird ranty post I’m feeling weird today and trying to figure out why and typing helps but I don’t want to look at this afterward

[freshwitchgladiator]

hm

#this is a weird ranty post I’m feeling weird today and trying to figure out why and typing helps but I don’t want to look at this afterward #the one thing tumble tags are good for esp on mobile tbh #mothers day is weird for me and id completely repressed it until my sisters talked about getting treats at church for being #quote: FUTURE MOMS #my one sister isn’t even 12 yet. but I think about Mother’s Day and I just feel weird. sometimes the kiddos call me mom still #it’s not often but it happens and part of that is oldest sister syndrome from being 6 years older than my oldest sibling #my parents for a really long time worked opposing full time jobs so while mom was at work dad was home but usually sleeping because he #works the grave shift and is an idiot who pushes himself to be awake at such random times that he has three different sleeping pills he has #to take whenever he fully exhausts himself #one of them and only one is ambien. #but I remember from the time when I was in like 6th grade I was expected most days to get me and my brother up and off to school #he was in kindergarten at the time #and I remember one day getting hyper fixated on something for school that morning so I didn’t get my brother to school on time and I got #grounded for two weeks for it #I was expected to parent without actually having any of the responsibilities or ability to discipline and so when things went wrong it was #always my fault #but because I don’t have kids bio or otherwise I’m overlooked #you ever look at yourself at go “huh apparently I need therapy for that too” #shut up Alex