#this fic fucks me up in the best ways

[beescake]

Sorry for the spam (^o^;) I just really like your blog

no need to apologize ayy!

in this corner we welcome all forms of enjoyment, regardless of whether you're a

happy to have yall here w me,

headin into homestuck 2024 :^)

#was debating if sollux truly was lurker type but then i rmbr'd him quietly reading all of karkat's memos for a good laugh HAHAHAHAAH #ask #aleemie #homestuck #karkat vantas #sollux captor #solkat #2024 #vioart #but o. regarding the etiquette learned frm other socmed #spamming here is safe+good! it does not harm the op by shadowbanning like instagram #and its not 💀 like twitter where ur likes/following are permanently set to public #ur tumblr experience is within ur control it can be as free/empty/curated as u want!! #((tho ofc i do encourage rbing for ppl who've been hoping to start that habit!! #s'cool to slowly work ur way up from the extra special posts that hv lingered longest in ur heart and quietly build ur cache trove :-) #for example back when i was struggling to rt on a new twt acc i just started setting nonsense criteria for myself LOL #like “breaking this void is scary holy fuck ok i shall start by rting posts w brownish/reddish clrs bcs its inspo vibes for my art” #and gradually after a while of deliberate sharing i gained more confidence to share a larger variety of posts that make me feel things!!!! #no more training wheels i may be scared but i love loving more!!!! #same goes for engaging w fics too it takes energy to think of how to comment and thats ok‚ do ur best to explore what works for u!!!! #take screenshots of ur fave paragraphs & start annotating in gallery/notes app if that helps!!!! #also tumblr's customizable queue means u can stack posts and bolt hgehehe. my preferred form of existing on the net))

[sprimps]

(the eyes, chico, they never lie)

#once again this is a whole ass fic in my mind. sighs #this is steves OH in italics moment #listen this is EXTREMELY important: tony cant sing. okay? he cant #he just plays the bass #had a punk rock band when he was younger #but he CANNOT sing aight #like come on he cant be extremely hot + a musician + A GOOD SINGER like thats too much #he cant be perfect #(+ the best mechanic in town) #also hes disgusting hes playing the bass w his hands full of motor oil and stuff. clean up b1tch boy #boo you wh0r3 #sorry i just read a fic where kirk says that to bones and it stuck w me its so funny #me to my dog unprompted at least 5 times a day: boo you wh0r3 #anyway #god i wish. i WISH i could draw comics #i also wish i wasnt lazy as fuck and knew how to animate without struggling 2 make tony WINK in that middle panel #like i know how to animate. in theory. but ive never done it seriously so its way too much effort #like. to animate a whole 4ss painting w colour and stuff.... even something small like a wink............. no way marica #BUT #i am happy w this drawing!!!! thats so crazy!!!!!! STEVE LOOKS GOOD??!!!!!!!!!??!? #please zoom in on that steve. he is HOT. an ADONIS #i peaked #baffled. astounded. bewildered #my art #tony stark #iron man #captain america #steve rogers #stony

[hella1975]

you ever have a fic get you in such a chokehold you start pacing your room and talking to yourself

#THIS FIC WAS WRITTEN FOR ME SPECIFICALLY #BURN IT ALL DOWN BY DOROTHYCANFLY ON AO3 THIS IS GENUINELY ONE OF MY TOP 5 FICS OF ALL TIME EVER #IT'S GOT THE BEST DABI CHARACTERISATION IVE EVER COME ACROSS IT'S GOT REALLY WELL WRITTEN DABIHAWKS #THAT FITS BOTH OF THEM LIKE THEY'RE MEAN AS HELL ABOUT IT AT FIRST #IT'S GOT STUPIDLY DEVOTED TOUYA-SHOUTO IT'S GOT PROTECTIVE BIG BROTHER TOUYA #IT'S GOT MENTAL ANGST WRITTEN LIKE A DREAM THE WRITING IN GENERAL IS INSANE #IT'S ACTION PACKED BUT DONE WELL SO THAT IT'S NOT TEDIOUS IT'S FUNNY IT'S GOT TWISTS #IT'S KEEPING ME ON MY TOES I NEVER KNOW WHAT'S COMING OR HOW FAR THE AUTHOR IS WILLING TO GO #IVE LITERALLY READ 300K WORDS IN TWO DAYS AT THIS POINT LIKE I AM ABSOLUTELY FINISHING THIS TONIGHT #WHAT THE FUCK EVEN AM I GONNA DO WITH MYSELF AFTER THIS #EVERY NEW THING THAT HAPPENS LITERALLY HAS ME GETTING UP TO PACE ABOUT #I CLOCKED OUT OF MY MUM TELLING ME OFF EARLIER BC I WAS THINKING ABOUT THIS FIC #DO U KNOW HOW DANGEROUS THAT IS BASO JUST SIGNED MY DEATH WARRANT BUT I DIDNT CARE #losing my goddamn mind respectfully <3 if anyone has read this pls yell with me about it #and if anyone knows mha and wants a fic rec PLEASE let it be this one it's my fav mha fic ever and ive read A LOT #it gets quite smutty in the middle but if that's not ur thing the author tws very well and u can kinda just scroll #so that u still get the important character developments without it being just pure smut lol #god this FIC. holding it in my fucking fist and squeezing the everloving life out of it im going INSANE #i cant remember the last time a fic got me this way im literally giggling about it all #HE FOUND A REASON TO LIVE AGAIN THEY TOOK THIS MANGLED BLOODY BOY AND SAID WE LOVE YOU #YOU ARE GOOD YOU CAN STAY YOU CAN REST NOW WE'LL TAKE CARE OF YOU AND HE CHOSE THEM! HE CHOSE THEM! #OVER HIS REVENGE AND HIS RAGE HE CHOSE THEM! IM GOING TO BE VIOLENTLY SICK #like the author LETS DABI BE A CUNT. the first chunk of the fic he's actively not a good person #and his coping mechanisms are shot to shit and we WATCH HIM GROW FROM THAT i have cried several times over the most mundane shit #goddddddddDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDAKSJFJKAGSFIUAHGJKAKG #mha #fic rec

[dazais-guardian-angel]

Happy birthday Mushitarou!

The sad silly green man is one of the absolute best and also one of the most criminally underrated characters in all of BSD. I don’t have any fics or anything for him today (EVENTUALLY... eventually....), but I’ll share some headcanons for him (+others) that I have 💚 (part headcanons/part analysis tbh)

Under the cut cause uhhhh this got a lot longer than I expected it would ahaha, smh:

While I don’t think he had any particular falling-out with his family, I think Mushi is naturally isolated from them, and only became more closed off after his father died, someone whom he was especially close to and who shaped him into the good person that he is. He was lonely growing up in school, and Yokomizo was as well, even though it didn’t seem that way on the surface due to the latter being much more outgoing and extroverted; neither of them had anyone who truly understood and engaged with their interests (especially not Mushi after the loss of his father). Yokomizo was also estranged from his relatives, even more so after he became obsessed with writing, so he and Mushi became as close as family after enough time had passed – they really were all each other had, in so many ways.

Mushi already visited Yokomizo frequently enough as it is, without much else to do in his life, but began coming to see him even more often after he was told about Yokomizo’s terminal illness/given the request to kill him. Despite Yokomizo’s desire to finish his novel before his health deteriorated enough to be noticeable, he was unable to do so, and as time wore on, Mushi began to worry that something would happen to Yokomizo without anyone there to help, and took it upon himself to take care of him. Yokomizo’s urgency to finish his writing became more desperate, yet Mushi tried to keep him from pushing himself, which somewhat worked – there was an unspoken understanding that both were trying to put off the inevitable; for Mushi, it was out of utter denial of losing him and of what he’d have to do, and for Yokomizo, it was out of a sorrowful desire to spend as much time with Mushi as he still could, and guilt for the tremendously selfish and cruel thing he was ultimately asking of him, even as both of these emotions fought with his stubborn desire to go out the way he wanted to.

Mushi’s façade of hatred towards Yokomizo after killing him, although mostly a coping mechanism to distance himself from him and his grief, is not entirely without basis: a small part of him did want to genuinely hate Yokomizo for forcing this upon him, though ultimately a much larger part of him simply hated himself for doing something so unspeakable to the person he called his friend, even if it was asked of him.

Yokomizo, however, wanted Mushi to hate him over all, even if he never said this outright. The months leading up to his death were filled with worry for his friend, for the person who was essentially like a younger family member to him (not exactly a little brother, but… something akin to that. Although they’re probably around the same age, I feel like Yokomizo was more mature (not in every way though of course), and was protective over Mushi in a lot of ways); he knew Mushi very well, and he knew that Mushi would not cope well with his death at all, let alone what he was asking of him – he already wasn’t coping well. Mushi always had walls up and pretended to be arrogant, pretended to be selfish and not care about anyone but himself, but Yokomizo was the one person he was comfortable around, and he had long since practically become home for him: although their time together was never anything extravagant, he was able to bring him out of his shell, and force him to do and think about things he never would have otherwise, giving them both a happiness they each would have never otherwise known for so many years. But then that fragile peace they had together, that safety net, was being cruelly ripped away from them both, and the thought that Mushi would go back to being lonely, closed-off, and isolated after he was gone, drowning in his grief and with no one else to support him anymore, was more devastating to Yokomizo than even the fact that he was dying. As cruel and selfish as asking Mushi to kill him for his perfect crime was, I think a part of him felt it would be even crueler to force Mushi to watch him slowly wither away from illness (and he, too, dreaded and was terrified of having to go out like that, after so much drawn-out pain), and he selfishly hoped that Mushi’s hatred of him for forcing this upon him would overcome his grief, and the inevitable self-loathing he would have – yes, Mushi could hate him, needed to hate him, anything to keep him from hating himself. Of course, Yokomizo knew that wouldn’t happen, because Mushi was far too kind, far too caring, and far too selfless – anyone who would do so much for him for so many years as he had, especially after he became ill, and would willingly agree to go as far as to essentially euthanize him for his selfish final dream, no matter how much all of it hurt him, was truly the greatest friend anyone could ask for. Mushi was and is a beautifully selfless person, but he himself could never see it – only Yokomizo could, and so he knew exactly how he would respond, and worried about him immensely because of it. And that worry made him want to try to distance himself from Mushi as much as possible, to die as soon as possible, even, so it wouldn’t be even harder on him than it already would be… but in the end what won over that was his desire to make as many happy memories with him as possible in those final months, so they could somehow try to forget about what was coming, if only briefly; so that Yokomizo could, maybe, somehow, in some small way, believe that Mushi would be okay in the end after he was gone. :’ )

Continuing this, as part of those memories, I headcanon Yokomizo liked to dance with Mushi a lot, since there’s some art of them doing that 💚 Mushi also took Yokomizo out to various quiet place, like to see fireworks or the beach. He canonically doesn’t like the smell of the salty sea air (why? I have no clue), but I hc Yokomizo loved the sea, so Mushi went with him there at least once oops my Yokomizo Oda similarity headcanons are showing-

Yokomizo wanted Mushi to be happy, but it also worried him that his friend clearly bottled everything up and never allowed himself to cry, either. So seeing him cry in his last moments was a huge weight off his shoulders, and was somehow what ultimately convinced him that Mushi would one day be okay again. :’ )

At some point, probably multiple times, Mushi and Yokomizo had a discussion where Mushi tried to make sure that Yokomizo truly, sincerely wanted him to do what he was asking of him. Around and around, trying to talk him out of it, insisting that he hadn’t truly thought it through, but Yokomizo was always gently steadfast. After they settled on strangulation (poison, aside from being ruled out for the sake of the reader, was not what Yokomizo preferred when his body was already painfully killing itself from the inside), Mushi tried to suggest that he be given a strong sleeping pill/sedative before being killed so that he wouldn’t feel it, but Yokomizo insisted against it, as it would imply sympathy on the part of the killer, which couldn’t happen. His sickly state, although it wasn’t yet public while he was still alive, would already suggest a mercy killing and was putting the plan/general reception at risk enough as it was. </3

After killing Yokomizo, Mushi handled his body ever-so-delicately, tenderly, almost reverently, just as he had many times before while carrying him, as he strung him up the way he was instructed, and even as he cut off his ears. He took his time doing it, wanting to hold his friend close and memorize what he looked like for as long as he possibly could in these final moments, even though he felt like his hands didn’t have the right to touch him anymore. Then, after everything was in place and he’d fled the premises with the manuscript, he promptly threw up somewhere. :’ )

Yokomizo was the second person to give him the nickname “Mushi”, after Mushi’s father. No one else ever calls him that now; it’s a name reserved only for them.

Mushi struggles while trying to write at Poe’s mansion out of a feeling of inferiority compared to Yokomizo; writing and mysteries were never his passion, they were Yokomizo’s, and he was just indulging the latter’s hobbies. He has no right to claim the role of writer for himself, not now that he’s gone and when he was only ever in it for Yokomizo to begin with… and there’s no possible way he can ever create anything good or original, when they’d already talked at length about how everything in the mystery genre had already been done, and Yokomizo himself created the ultimate mystery that no one could ever possible top, least of all him.

But Poe knows that what he writes doesn’t need to be perfect or even good; Mushi only needs to do it as a form of therapy for himself, because it will bring him closer to his deceased friend, since mysteries are what they enjoyed most when he was alive. (and I honestly think Poe would understand and empathize Mushi very well, having been so isolated and lonely in the past himself before Ranpo essentially saved him just as Yokomizo did for him) Once he’s able to convey that to him, it gradually comes more naturally to Mushi and becomes comforting for him as Poe intended. 💚

Mushi forms a reluctant friendship with Karl over the course of his stay with Poe (inspired by this person’s art series of them together 🥹). It starts with Karl trying to help the first time Mushi has a nightmare there, and after that he starts bothering him/trying to get his attention in general, until Mushi slowly gives in, becoming begrudgingly fond of the little creature. Whenever he’s having a hard time, whether it be a nightmare or a panic attack or just listlessness, Karl is usually there for him, as his own personal therapy raccoon. 💚

To add to that, Mushi canonically dislikes thunder; I headcanon that when they were together during storms, Yokomizo always made sure to be even more chatty than usual, to distract Mushi from his fear of the noise. Once he’s at Poe’s mansion, when it storms, he suddenly realizes how much louder and scarier the thunder feels now… but of course he doesn’t let it show. Karl, however, notices his discomfort, and is there for him during storms now. :’ )

Post-series, in general, Mushi always brings treats for Karl whenever he meets up with Poe again. 💚

A headcanon plenty of people have, but Ango is absolutely crucial to Mushi’s journey of healing. Post-series, they have quite a few talks about their respective situations, and Ango is the one person Mushi ultimately (after enough time, of course) bears the most of his soul and his pain to, because Ango can empathize with him and understand his guilt/self-loathing/sorrow in a way none of the others can. Earlier on, Ango checks on Mushi the most (Ranpo and Poe do too though) to make sure that he’s taking care of himself, just like he occasionally does/did with Dazai.

Mushi starts wearing traditional clothes more often after Yokomizo’s death, including a few old things that used to belong to him, that are comforting to Mushi.

There aren’t many public photos of Yokomizo, since he was a rather private author. There is, however, only one single personal photo of him, one he roped a grumpy Mushi into taking with him once, his own expression being as sunshine-y and exuberant as always in contrast. Mushi cherishes it now :’ ) oops the buraiha trio vibes strike again

Because of his period of dealing with Yokomizo’s terminal illness, Mushi has some medical-related knowledge that the average person probably wouldn’t. It isn’t the kind of thing he wants to dwell on after Yokomizo’s death, and he can’t stand being around hospitals, for obvious reasons, but regardless, whether he’s consciously aware of it or not, he is especially compassionate/understanding towards those who are sick and disabled that he encounters. His time with Yokomizo has given him perspectives and philosophies about life that he wouldn’t otherwise have, and when he’s not trying to write strictly mysteries, it’s the sort of things that are evident in his writing. In a way, writing about it in general is healing for him, separate from mysteries being comforting to him solely because they’re associated with Yokomizo.

At some point, Mushi starts visiting Yokomizo’s grave together with Ango, Poe, and Ranpo, or sometimes just Ango. Similarly, he, Poe and Ranpo join Ango in visiting Oda’s grave. He and Ango each tell stories about their respective lost loved ones, so that more people will learn about and remember who they once were. 💚

With his ability, Ango is able to read the memories within the room Yokomizo was living in (or perhaps in objects Mushi owns), and see numerous happy memories he had with Mushi, long before his illness and death. With what he sees and conveys, Poe is able to write a small story of the memory, which he then gives to Mushi, allowing him to go into the story and relive the memory and see Yokomizo again for the first time in years. It’s not the real Yokomizo, and Mushi knows this – he’s long since stopped seeing the hallucination of him, because he’s healed enough by this point. But even so, just knowing that the book is there, that he can see his friend moving and talking again whenever he wishes – a version of Yokomizo that is just as happy and bright and energetic as he always remembered, without suffering from illness – is the greatest gift and kindness he could ever imagine receiving, and from his new friends no less, and it’s enough to make him cry, from how loved he truly is :’ ) 💚

I love Mushitarou sooooo much, and I truly hope he gets more attention in the future (can’t wait for tomorrow’s episode!!), because his story is so touching and his character so relatable and comforting 🥹 and I sincerely hope he finds his ultimate happiness in the manga one day. Happy birthday, you sweet, sentimental, pathetic (affectionate), goofy little gremlin man 💚

#bungou stray dogs #mushitarou oguri #meta #HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MUSHI TAKE MY ANGST-FILLED HEADCANONS #that will hopefully be fics someday. ha. haaaaaaah......... #'i dont have anything for his birthday :(' *writes 2.3k words of headcanons/character analysis dumping* typical me smh #'this will be short' narrator: it was not and never will be short #i just love him so much!!!! he's too underrated!!! more people need to talk about him *cries* #then again i feel like literally everyone who isn't skk or fyolai are underrated in one way or another in the bsd fandom sooooooo lol #but especially mushi </3 #it took me way too long to appreciate him but he is genuinely one of the best written characters in the series imo #up there with Oda #god #mark my words there's gonna be parallels between his and yokomizo's story later with fyolai #as there already is with him and oda & dazai #and then you all will see!!! the importance of his arc!!!! #him and ango too!!! aughhhhh i never get over how asagiri tied him and ango together so BEAUTIFULLY in a way that makes PERFECT SENSE #I'M NOT READY TO CRY TOMORROW FUCK 😭😭😭 #anyway stan mushitarou he is best boy #he could take down fyodor with one kick full stop #in fact i think that's what he deserves

[duckuwu]

me, whilst reading the unbroken & the faithless: oh, touraine, you idiot (fondly).

#halfway through faithless rn. but when i tell you i consumed the unbroken in a day i'm not lying (saturday) #and i forced myself to only spend half a day reading faithless (sunday) which is why it's only half done #but good lordt it's so fucking GOOD #and i ship them so hard dammit #some good shit right here yall #i've been reading a LOT this year (actual books. i actually havent read any fic this year. it's weird) #and yeah. the jasmine throne / oleander sword & the unbroken / the faithless. just fucking another level of exactly what i want #now just give me those third books dammit!! #duck reads #i think that was the tag #to be clear: i totally understand WHY touraine does the things she does. completely justified. but oh darling. #she's perfect actually. you know? in the context of everything. just the perfect way to understand #(but also so is luca in her own way) #my two fuck ups just trying to do their best damnit #gods it's GORGEOUS and ANGSTY in the most beautiful of ways

[cannebady]

Izzy Hands is a lucky son of a bitch and he fucking knows it, okay? Maybe he's not one for Bonnet's sentimentality, but he knows a good lot when he sees one and fuck, has he lucked into a good lot.

It's been years since he and Ed did this. When they were young and even more fucking unstable, they'd come together in a crush of teeth and nails, would call and claim blood, and tears from each other while pushing beyond their limits, chasing something they couldn't even see, didn't have the vocabulary for.

So, it wasn't a fucking love story (he tries not to think about who it wasn't a love story for) with roses and oils and fucking trinkets of adoration but Ed could look at Izzy and just know what he wanted. Whether he wanted to be taken rough and bloody, or if he was the one that wanted to do the taking.

He never needed more than that, he thought. He knew what he was to Edward and that was enough. Sure, things had fizzled over the years, they were older men now and they'd never made each other promises, even if there was one always at the tip of Izzy's tongue, one he was always swallowing back like a bitter fucking pill.

Nowadays, though, he lives in a spoil of riches. And he had Ed to thank, partially for it. He also has to thank Bonnet, he supposes, because it may haven taken him an age, but that soft, golden, sun-shining-out-your-arse thing that seduced Edward did its trick on him too. Fucking hell.

Here's the thing, Ed still knows how to push the right buttons, how to get Izzy frothing at the mouth, roughed up and ready, but Bonnet? Stede Fucking Bonnet turned Izzy's world upside down the first time they all came together.

While Ed knows what Izzy wants, fucking Stede fucking Bonnet knows what Izzy needs. Ed will hold him down with his big, calloused hands and it drives Izzy to want to bite and scratch and grab until he's coming himself unconscious. It's incredible, always has been. But Stede makes Izzy writhe with the juxtaposition of soft and hard. Sometimes, his hands rend Izzy apart, his fingers painting a mosaic of bruises onto Izzy's skin, while he tells him "Oh, Israel, look at you. Gorgeous. You're so beautiful, so good," and other times, he'll put Izzy in his fucking place when he's being a twat about things saying, "Now don't be difficult Israel, you know I know how much you need this. Look at you, gagging for it," while gently, borderline fucking tenderly, sweeping his hair from his forehead and pressing barely there kisses to his throat while Ed looks on, pupils blown and biting his lip, as he watches Stede fucking destroy him.

It's so much more than he ever thought he could have and while it makes him want to remove a toe himself to admit it, his feelings for Bonnet, for Stede, are leagues apart from hate or annoyance. In fact, if he can ever be fucked to move from this place, sandwiched warm and content between his Captains, he might give thought to thinking about putting a fucking word to what he's feeling.

The word might be love, but Izzy pleads ignorance for his own fucking sanity.

#Izzy hands #Israel hands #Stede bonnet #stede x ed x izzy #Steddy hands #Steddyhands #Ot3 #Ofmd #Our flag means death #My fic #Ficlet #Good lord they have me so fucked up #And you just know that between Stede and Ed they could fucking ruin Izzy in the best ways #Edward teach

[mutalune]

me when people hate on aos trek:

#starlight fandom #starlight trek #LOOK I KNOW THEY AREN’T GOOD MOVIES THEY WERE IF MARVEL HIT STAR TREK WITH A BASEBALL BAT BEHIND A CLUB #BUT AOS GOT ME INTO STAR TREK IN THE FIRST PLACE OKAY IT HAS A PLACE IN MY HEART FOREVER #AND IT’S NOT AOS!JIM’S FAULT THAT THEY WROTE HIM BAD I ACTUALLY THINK ITS REAL INTERESTING #TO SEE A VERSION OF JIM KIRK THAT’S TRAUMATIZED AND FUCKED UP AND DIDN’T HAVE A FATHER AND YET HE STILL ENDS UP COMPASSIONATE #HE STILL ENDS UP A LEADER AND KIND #like fr tho that’s a fascinating concept #how much things may be different and how Spock!prime broke the timeline by melding with aos!kirk #and Kirk still ends up kind and loving and beloved anyway!!!!! #like I’m sorry they didn’t execute well until beyond and honestly I ignore stid entirely but it’s such a cool concept to me #and Karl urban as bones was so. SO. SO GOOD. he was perfect and deranged in the best way #Quinto-Spock I can take or leave but I do love me a bitchy Vulcan and he did have that #it’s okay to not like aos I don’t blame anyone for not liking it but I am so fond of it folks I truly am #and I’m not just saying that b/c the fic I’m writing rn for comfort and therapy reasons is projecting my current issues on aos!kirk #he’s just really to project onto and he looks like he’d benefit from ketamine treatment too and learning how to have hobbies w/o stress #anyway like I said I don’t blame anyone for disliking it or erasing it from their fandom memory #but it got me into Star Trek and I’m grateful and if ppl weren’t cowards aos!kirk would be so fucking fascinating in a feral way

[owlf45]

Sorry for being shippy but… does dabi like, like-like hawks in imaginary? Or is it a “i pity you moderately good looking bird” situation?

ill be fr, i've never gotten to the part in the anime/manga where dabi and hawks interact. i might joke around with them and if i ever catch up on the series, we'll see how it goes from there

#... actually i never got to the part.. when hawks shows up #i honestly am flying with hawks by the seat of my pants and his wiki page and my friend ro's characterization of him #and 'every time hawks shows up in the anime' and 'hawks analysis' youtube videos #if hawks is ooc let it be known that i didnt intend for him to steal a spotlight in imaginary he just kind of casually demanded it #my asks #imaginary #in fact. about to put myself on blast here #the whole reason i 'changed' canon and Hawks attended UA was bc. Hawks was a brand new character at the time i was writing the fic. #and little ol me just fucking. assumed he'd gone to UA for some reason #so i wrote it that way #that was not like a deep intentional change that was me fucking around with a character and finding out #i think i read another fic where he was at UA. thats why #but anyway #hes still roped into the commission's shit dont get me wrong. but for whatever reason i thought the commission enrolled him into hero schoo #on top of their conditioning #youll have to forgive my four-years-ago self. i did my best lmfao #again: whoopsie! #hawks doesnt repeatedly show up in imaginary because of plot (though it works out in the recent arcs). he shows up because of vibes #and a repeated middle finger in my face

[allyricas]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Stranger Things (TV 2016) Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Steve Harrington/Eddie Munson Characters: Steve Harrington, Eddie Munson, Nancy Wheeler, Robin Buckley, The Party (Stranger Things) Additional Tags: Psychological Horror, Unreliable Narrator, Steve Harrington as Kas the Betrayer (Dungeons & Dragons), mild body horror, Eddie Munson Needs a Hug, He doesn't want one from Steve Harrington, Everyone's just trying their best here, medical treatment, Psychological Warfare, mention of near suffocation, Mention of Animal Death, Paranoia, Eddie gets' sedated a few times and he's not exactly happy about it Summary:

Eddie was turned inside out and back to front and right side up for months to make sure he was just the same as he always was. Eddie went into the Upside Down and lived to tell the tale beyond all scientific logic. He was chewed up and spit out and he wasn’t much different whatsoever.

Eddie Munson came back right.

Except for one thing.

Eddie Munson came back right, except for now, he could see that Steve Harrington never was.

#this fucked me up in the best way #psychological horror #steddie fic rec #steddie #tense unsettling horrorific #all meant as huge compliments #the real question is why did i read it at 2am

[thecollectionsof]

Can I have 11 and 19 please 😊

11. What work took you the longest to write?

this year?? i mean soulmate au has been a wip since early september so i think that one takes the cake, but as-of-yet unreleased postcards fic was conceptualized in may and is looking to be my longest fic yet so that one might beat it. for posted fics it was scam likely, which i think i started in march 2022??

19. What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

i think i wanna do more lemyanka maybe? and i would like to actually write for s16 ships when people are into them because i missed that for s15 :p who knows if i will, because i'm not really the type to write ships i'm not into myself, but i'm hoping i'll find one that i enjoy!!!! :)

#speaking of s16 #i am a bit nervous that dawn and amanda are the type to read fics because they've already been jokingly shipping themselves with each other #in the we WILL pander to the audience and play this up type of way #so... i do have a few reservations there but i might just say fuck it and write and hope for the best #i mean they want to read interesting and juicy things anyway so i should be good with my 500000 fics of fluff and crushes and mutual pining #not very riveting if you don't like the ships i don't think but it pleases me so that's what we do :) #idk this is all to say that we'll have to see how s16 goes but as of now i'm excited to see what ships people like #junosjukebox #ask games!

[xamaxenta]

Carry my Burdens

Carry my Burdens by Apphia_Rotho on Ao3

#xam reads fanfics #xam reads #fic recs #I got super choked up half way you can sort of hear it #Like this fic brutalised me in the best way i fucking love it so much #by apphia_rotho or liferockingitout here on tumblr give them some loveeee their work is phenomenal #also recording muffled as fuck bc it was RAINING AND I WAS LIKEAA

[sinister-art]

After some trial and error, I have finally finished Leo's patronus from @alycornz and @morning-sun-brah's rotTMNT/Harry Potter crossover! Link to the fic under the cut, please go check out their fic! I promise you, it is SO worth it.

Leo's patronus is a wolf, and I decided to give that flair of purple because you can't have Leo popping up without Donnie somewhere in the mix. Enjoy!

Their amazing fic:

#until i reach you again #harry potter crossover #rottmnt crossover #it took me forever to make this bc i LOST IT WHEN MY OLD PHONE GAVE UP ON ME #but I digress #tis done now! #i had the base done for a while #it was the background that fucked with me #it was either too little or too much #and i was like... #“Leo is best of both worlds” #he's also a trip and a half #and i had to reflect that #ANYWHORE #Plz read the fic it is actually amazing #also #aly and acornz i hope you know I'm absolutely drawing that dragon scene #but in what way? #you'll find out soon enough >:) #rottmnt #rottmnt leo

[cowboy-robooty]

now that wiener has changed me i can show my true colors to you all. this is the equivalent of me posting my little prince on the internet okay because i genuinely think this is cringe and stupid but i cant help it i have autistic rage and everyday i fight against it. anyways the reason why its so big i like wieners itapan is bc this is how i actually feel about itapan

its okay though because everyday i fight to cure myself of these aids (once i opened my social media app and saw itapan and my day genuinely felt significantly worse. ruined even. i am fighting so hard).

#BECAUSE I FOR REALSIES THINK ITS SO DUMB TO GET ACTUALLY DEADASS MAD AT FICTIONAL SHIPS #WHO THE FUCK CARES #AINT NOBODY CARE ABOUT THAT SHIT SHUT YO DUMBASS UP!!!!! #but my weakness... is itager... because idk im ill abt them its not a joke #ive been this way for like 6 years now #i can handle reading fanfics of germany x other characters bc germany literally never loves them #like all the fics i read of him x other characters is just him being tortured by them and he doesnt even like them #the only way he reciprocates their affections is literally after white room torture and getting turned into a different person #i believe that i think thats true thats the only way he could possibly show romantic affection to someone other than italy #i only can tolerate and sometimes enjoy content of germy/itatard x other people if its onesided and they dont love the other person #bc then im like yeah seems legit cuz theyd only love eachother in all universes #and i feel this way abt basically all of my ships i care abt bc im a monoshipper #but usually i wont give a fuck if i see them with other people im like that sucks lol but not my house not my soup! #BUT ITAGER....... IT MAKES ME CRAZY #IT MAKES ME ACT LIKE A FREAK ! I DONT ENDORSE MY OWN BEHAVIOR #thats why this is my shame............. this is my one true cringe and something i genuinely consider a flaw of mine #one of my few if not only autistic rage inducers............. please accept me for who i am. i am trying to fight this (ngl im losing but #we still try our best bc i want to have no weaknesses) #one of my few weaknesses..... #robooty dick pic

[scattered-winter]

ok winter...it's my turn now: jaykyle. i am intrigued, and i'd like to know as much as is feasible to tell me. (it's killing me to send something this open-ended but i feel like i don't actually know enough about them to be more specific.)

TEEHEE <3333 SOOOO GLAD YOU ASKED BECAUSE I CARE THEM <33

jaykyle is a ship between two of my favorite dc characters, jason todd and kyle rayner. they're both sooo fascinating on their own AND as a pairing and I just <3333 this is gonna get long because 1) they both have very long and complicated stories that's gonna take a bit to unpack and 2) I love them <33 and I love to talk about them <333 a bit of forewarning, but comics storylines are RIDICULOUSLY complicated and pretty much every single character has more origins, timelines, and personalities than you can shake a stick at. in the comics fandom we take marie kondo's words to heart because if we tried to stick to What Canon Says, we would be running in circles all day because everything contradicts itself. everything is canon and nothing is canon and if it doesn't spark joy, it isn't true <3 I'll explain everything to the best of my ability but it's gonna get Real Complicated Real Fast

tw for death (child and otherwise)

jason todd (playlist) is part of the batfam (group of vigilantes associated with batman) and he's also part of the wayne family (by adoption). I looked everywhere for the panels to show how he was introduced because it's objectively the funniest way to introduce any character but alas, they have eluded me so I'll just tell you: he grew up in the poorer parts of gotham city with his parents, catherine and willis todd. willis got caught up in two-face's gang (because gotham city as a whole has a trend of eating its people alive/forcing them to do crime because they're desperate and have no choice etc etc) and ended up getting killed because of it, and catherine died of an illness, leaving jason to fend for himself on the streets.* he is brought into the story by jacking the tires off the BATMOBILE, and getting caught by batman himself. in response to this he hits batman with a tire iron, calls him a big boob, and runs away (and in the process making bruce laugh out loud in the same place his parents died which makes me SOO OUGHOUGHOUGHOUGH)

*catherine and willis both loved jason very much, but recent comics have portrayed willis as abusive/catherine as neglectful, which doesn't spark joy for me personally so I tend to ignore those ones and stick to the others where they were genuinely loving parents who fell on hard times.

the original robin, dick grayson, recently moved on from the mantle and went to live somewhere else,* so bruce adopted jason and started training him as the new robin. he was a very bright, very loving boy who enthusiastically went to school and read books and loved bruce so so much and bruce loved him because that was his KID.**

*I can't remember if he went to live with the titans or went to gotham's sister city, bludhaven; but in any case he ends up in bludhaven eventually and operates there as nightwing

**In more recent comics, jason's robin days are portrayed as him being brash and violent (new drinking game: take a shot every time a comic describes robin jason as "angry" or "reckless" smfh) and of course while being a vigilante involves violence, and being a well-rounded character, jason did indeed have moments of anger, I strongly dislike this way of thinking because it takes so much away from his character and you'll see what I mean by that in a minute.

however, the happy days weren't gonna last. jason discovered that catherine todd wasn't his biological mother, and he had found some evidence pointing to who his birth mother was. (I think it was a birth certificate that was partially damaged so he couldn't see the whole name but it's been a while since I've read the comic where that happens so don't quote me on that) but regardless of how he found out, jason set out to find his real mother. he'd narrowed down the list of possible mothers to a few different women, so he found them each in turn and ruled them out as he went. he ran away from home to go on his little self-discovery mission, and the only reason bruce didn't go after him was because the joker had a big scheme with a nuclear missile that kinda took precedence. but by pure happenstance, they ran into each other and decided to work together for both their goals (stopping joker AND finding jason's mom). eventually jason and bruce narrowed the list down to one woman: sheila haywood. they travelled to ethiopia to find her, and jason actually did, but moments after meeting her, sheila betrayed him and handed him over to the joker, who proceeded to beat jason within an inch of his life with a crowbar while sheila watched.

(batman: a death in the family)

he then tied up sheila and left them both to die in the warehouse because he rigged it with a bomb. jason, despite being betrayed by her literally minutes before, stopped to untie her to get her out instead of saving himself. but the bomb went off with them both inside, just in time for batman (who had been frantically rushing to the warehouse as soon as he heard that jason had been captured) to see the explosion <3

(batman: a death in the family)

and the thing that REALLY fucks me up is that even after everything she did to him, jason still used himself as a human shield to try and protect sheila. these two panels have literally caused me lasting damage

(batman: a death in the family)

this is also why the narrative of jason being reckless makes me so angry. he didn't die because he was a reckless idiot who rushed into danger without a thought, he died because he tried to save a woman who nearly got him killed. he died shielding her with his own body even though she betrayed him literally a few minutes earlier. some comic writers have rewritten the scene to take out sheila entirely, but that takes away a huge part of the story!!!! jason didn't die because he was reckless!! he died because he was trying to save someone!!!! I will literally fight people on that to my grave smh

bruce brought jason's body back to gotham and buried him, and was never really the same after that (but that's a topic for another ramble because this is about THE BOY <3)

this is where things get a little trippy <3 first thing you gotta know about comic books is that death is RARELY permanent. the exact details are lost on me since I tend to avoid the big crisis events (and the headache they give me) but basically superboy-prime punches the fabric of the universe and kinda .. breaks some things. and jason wakes up in his coffin (slightly zombified), six feet underground. after clawing his way out of his own fucking grave, jason gets hit by a fucking CAR and is then taken in by talia al ghul (one of bruce's past lovers, daughter of ra's al ghul [leader of the league of assassins]). talia put jason in something called a lazarus pit, which is basically a pool of green bubbly goo that can resurrect someone (ra's al ghul is hundreds of years old and keeps himself alive with the pits). jason came fully back to life and stayed with talia for a time, during which he travelled the world to be trained by some of the best/most notorious fighters and assassins all over the globe. at this point, he'd been dead for quite a while (a year AT LEAST) and so when he finds out that the joker is still fucking ALIVE, it's .... a shock, to say the least. it's a very complicated issue because batman's deepest-rooted rule is to Never Kill, and there were a lot of underlying circumstances preventing him from killing the joker right after jason's death (despite really, really wanting to) but the thing is. the joker just keeps killing and hurting people, and he gets put in arkham asylum, and escapes and kills more people, then gets put in arkham again, and it's just a vicious cycle where the joker just keeps hurting more and more people. and like. jason got murdered by the joker and the guy is still fucking alive and murdering more people. so he heads off to gotham with a huge plan to confront bruce and make him choose once and for all: kill the joker, or let jason die. this whole arc is my very favorite comic book of all time, batman: under the red hood <333 basically jason becomes a crime boss called red hood (which was the joker's old alias before he became...well, the joker) and plots CIRCLES around bruce, joker, and the other crime bosses. they're literally his pawns the entire time <3 but this all comes to a head when jason traps batman, the joker, and himself in a room where he finally reveals his identity to batman and gives him an ultimatum: kill the joker, or kill him. he had the whole place rigged with explosives so that no matter what bruce chose, they would still blow up (as a form of insurance? as a form of suicide? who knows!)

I'd like to point out the obvious and say that jason was NOT in a great state of mind during this whole thing. like. this post highlights it very well imo, but tl:dr jason didn't really...make a plan for after the showdown. it was clear that he had a single goal in mind, which was facing off with bruce and the joker once and for all, and it was also clear how it would end because he knew deep down that bruce would never kill the joker. so he knew he would die going into it but he didn't really care. he did in fact die at the end of under the red hood, since he was originally meant to be a one-off character, but he was so popular that dc sorta erased his death at the end of utrh and established him as a main batfam player.

jason's post-resurrection characterization is REALLY inconsistent, but really at his core, he's deeply traumatized and angry, and his driving motivation is to save gotham in what he deems is the "right" way: killing criminals so that they're no longer a problem. which, considering how many times supervillains break out of arkham and wreak havoc, isn't really that far of a stretch. but because of batman's firm moral stance on killing, the two have a very .... complicated relationship. but regardless jason has one of the coolest designs in the entire batfam in my opinion <3

(batman: three jokers)

(red hood and the outlaws) (I hate this comic for what it did to the other characters but the art was pretty at least)

sometimes he's drawn with a white streak in his hair (a side effect of the lazarus pit) which is one of my FAVORITE looks for him <33 and he's a regular contender for my icon because he's my blorbo bingus blob boy <3333

BUT ANYWAY <333 ON TO KYLE <333

disclaimer: I haven't been reading kyle's comics as long as I have jason's (jason was my gateway character who first got me into comics in the first place so I had a lot more time to really dig into his comics and characterization) and there's a lot of info about each character that's kind of...absorbed over time. because there's so many different stories and comics about each character, it's hard to find everything they appear in, and since I haven't been reading kyle for as long, I don't consider myself an expert on him in any way but I'll do my best to talk about him because he's my favorite green lantern <3

(playlist) in order to explain kyle, first I need to explain hal jordan. he's the Original green lantern (meaning when you think of the dc superhero green lantern, he's probably the one who comes to mind despite there being more lanterns than I can count. he's the most well-known by FAR) but basically, the green lanterns are an intergalactic military/police force led by the guardians (a bunch of really tiny blue guys). they use green power rings that are fueled by willpower, and so only someone with a lot of willpower (specifically, the will to "overcome great fear") can be a green lantern. (there's a ring for every color on the spectrum, but that's another ramble for another day). hal jordan had been losing faith in the lantern corps for a long time, but the last straw was when his hometown, coast city, was destroyed. hal basically went into a massive grief spiral and tried to bring back the entire city and didn't have enough power to do that, so he took on the name parallax and murdered pretty much the entire corps, and most of the guardians to absorb the main green power source to get enough power to Resurrect The City. but one guardian managed to escape to earth, where he found kyle rayner and gave him the last green power ring.

being practically the only green lantern left, kyle had to defeat parallax and restore the corps practically by himself. and the thing about kyle is that he's the GOOFIEST guy on the planet (affectionate). upon finding out that he's now a superhero he proceeds to immediately go tell his ex-girlfriend about it (alex <333) and they have a photoshoot of him in his suit. I fucking love them <333

but alas!!! happy days don't last <3 kyle leaves alex alone for literally only a few minutes to go be a hero, and while he's gone, one of green lantern's biggest enemies breaks into her apartment and murders her. kyle comes back to find her dead body stuffed inside the fridge (fun fact: that's actually where the term "fridging" came from <3) and he proceeds to. torture and almost kill the guy who did it. we love an unhinged icon <3

(green lantern #55)

it's been a while since I've read his origin comic, but kyle eventually defeats parallax. further down the line, he becomes a white lantern (mega-powerful because it has the powers of all the colors in the spectrum, not just green) and in my personal favorite comic, also becomes ion (basically the living embodiment of green lantern power. also basically a god) and tbh it's his BEST look of all time

(ion: guardian of the universe)

like I said, I don't really have as clear of an idea of kyle's timeline since there's a few gaps in my reading, but the essentials is that he literally can't keep a girlfriend because they keep dying, and he continuously gets the power of a literal god and is so humble and heroic about it that it never goes to his head. but he also consistently tortures and kills without really showing any remorse whatsoever <33 he has the range <33

BUT. AT LAST. WE GET TO JAYKYLE. THE THING YOU ASKED ABOUT IN THE FIRST PLACE. there's only ONE comic that I know of where they actually interact on-panel, and that's countdown presents: the search for ray palmer. it's tied in with countdown to final crisis, which is one of the biggest dc events of all time, and I haven't read it and probably never will because the big crises always give me SUCH a headache to try and understand </3 but I HAVE read search for ray palmer because <3 of them <3

essentially it's a story where the atom (ray palmer) gets lost in the multiverse and so 3 people who are already kind of...Outside the Mainstream Timeline embark on a multiverse journey to find him. those 3 people? jason todd, kyle rayner, and donna troy. jason is only alive because the timeline shattered, kyle was literally a time-and-reality-altering god not just once, but multiple times, and donna troy has also died and come back and like. is the only comics character with Self Awareness (remember when I said every comic book character has a gazillion different origins and reboots? donna remembers ALL of them <3) and so all three of them are affectionately referred to as "cosmic mistakes" because. they're literally irregularities in the cosmic timestream. and I love them for it <3

the reason I'm a jaykyle truther is because. they're so fucking funny in that comic. they argue in pretty much every single panel they share, but their internal monologues are....very, very homoeretic.

(kyle, about jason) (countdown: search for ray palmer: wildstorm)

(jason, about kyle) (countdown to final crisis #33)

and honestly, it's about how fucked up they would be together. they would tear each other apart and also tear apart everyone else and it would be a horrible time for everyone involved <3 there are ships for cute cuddles and then there are ships for fucking killing each other and jaykyle is the second one <3333

#i kind of. ran out of steam by the time it came to talk about jaykyle which is. funny. given that it's what you Asked about #but listen. they're so so messed up. it compels me <3 #i wrote a lot of fic for them and tbh i didnt really lean into the fucked up-ness of their relationship as i could have <3 #but like. they do care about each other in their own ways but they're both so headstrong and almost...Too different that it wouldn't last #like. jason is Very repressed. my mans is batman's kid he's learned from the best when it comes to Not Feeling Emotions #and kyle has literally mastered the entire emotional spectrum to the extent that he could wield the white ring. #you have one guy who's ruled by his emotions because he can't express/truly feel them on one end #and you have a guy who's ruled by his emotions because he wears his heart on his sleeve and follows his heart with everything he does #and factor in how they're both so stubborn? and how they're both so damaged and traumatized in their own ways?? #they're a disaster <3 #anyway. i lomve them <3 #tysm for asking this literally took me hours to write but it was the BEST few hours of my life #typing with the biggest goofiest look on my face <3 #jaykyle #leo 🌻 #jason todd #kyle rayner #fun fact! for a while i was one of the top jaykyle blogs <33 #probably not anymore since my 911 blogging has kinda taken over my dc blogging for the moment #but still. for a while there i was winning <3 #there are also quite a few mutuals of mine who definitely could have explained this better but alas. #very very glad you came to me with this it made my day <3333333

[urproblematicfav-arsonk]

im gonna explode, im waiting so patiently for that radiohusk roofie fic

thnk u bby. I worry that I'm going to lose whatever momentum I have going rn and not actually finish it all the way through(like I almost always have done lol) Probably gonna post the drunk/coercion bit as chapter 1 and eventually get wild with the roofie/somno shit after, still gotta research that stuff also. Anyway

here's a snippy of the garbage I got so far, *tips hat* for ur troubles

#alastor: *physically incapable of apologizing* alright i guess we have no choice but to settle this with rape #husk: why the absolute fuck would that be a way to solve anything #alastor: idk cuz we're in hell?? if u don't wanna we don't have to- #husk: i didn't say that #text distorter is fun #no idea if i should like be using it from a technical standpoint but whos gonna stop me #husk is russian because russian is a fun sounding language #i think this fic is gonna end up being like 3-4k?? is that a lot no not really but im doing my best #i literally haven't written anything in 4 years cuz i got too sad over accidentally deleted a multichap thing i worked rlly hard on #radiohusk #fic wip #my writing #anon

[infinite-orangepeel]

@eddywoww’s ‘secrets, secrets’ fic has me on my knees 🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️bitchy rich boy steve who can only be put in his place by eddie munson is just ???? literally my favorite steddie trope of all time and every chapter has me SWEATING

#eddywow you are so famous to me you don’t understand #the most recent chapter has me so fucked up in the best way #thank u <333 #eddywow supremacy #steddie #steddie brainrot #steddie fics #steddie fic recs #steddie ao3 #steddie ao3 fics #ao3 steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #fruity four #steve x eddie #steve harrington/eddie munson