Tumgik
#they think he keeps getting duped and he needs to be less gullible
eats-the-stars · 3 years
Text
so i’ve decided to write a naruto fanfic. well, a lot of them. and in the process i’ve been making OCs and...i forgot how much i love making OCs and going wild w/my original plots. especially for a world like naruto where you can get away w/basically anything. like right now my fav OC is a little girl from shimogakure. i gave that kid a feisty little talking nin-goat for a bff. why? because i could. they both exist to get escorted back to Shimo but i still put a lot of work into them. they’re not interested in making anyone’s life easier and it’s beautiful. iruka, kotetsu, and izumo are all children of refugees from Uzushio (they were on the same genin team bc i love them. also i made an OC jounin-sensei for them and she’s just...perfect. trap master. summons ninja weasels. expected her genin to die in like week 1. likes to ditch them randomly. doesn’t show up to mandatory events and ppl are like ‘did they even give u a jounin-sensei or?’ sometimes she sends a weasel w/them instead. half of konoha thinks their jounin-sensei is an actual weasel. might throw in some confusion where they’re like “...Itachi? The Uchiha? isn’t he...too young? and not a kunoichi?” (because his name means weasel lol) iruka’s grandma left a nin-cat behind and she (the nin-cat) decides to teach iruka and his pals the art of fuuinjutsu. iruka/izumo/kotetsu get more instruction from random ninja animals than actual people. izumo can see ghosts and they pitch in. nobody in konoha knows who/what their jounin-sensei is. w/the exception of Anko and Hayate. Ibiki is done. he keeps walking in on things and walking right back out). i made a whole plot about ppl from Konoha treating refugees n their kids like shit. Kotetsu gets a cool uncle. Izumo gets shitty parents. there’s an Uzushio district in Konoha. iruka’s grandma was a dragon. he adopts naruto. the peeps from Uzushio are more chill about the jinchuuriki thing. naruto gets lots of stories about his kickass mom. iruka teaches him how to summon seagulls and immediately regrets it. plot things happen and the uchiha massacre doesn’t go down. instead madara ends up getting his ass kicked by iruka’s grandma (the dragon one). itachi doesn’t defect. sasuke is just like...a teenager with a helicopter bro. still got dead parents tho. danzo’s plans keep going to shit. no breaks for him. team 7 is semi-functional since sasuke isn’t as messed up and naruto has tons of support and doesn’t need to go so hard to prove himself. i mean he still goes hard and he wants to be hokage but sasuke’s not a massive dick to him and there’s a good chunk of the village rooting for him already. plus sakura isn’t crushing on sasuke. since he’s not ‘the last uchiha’ there’s no girl craze over him. i just realized that a ton of my OCs are like...ninja animals. also relatives of characters + jounin-sensei for characters that never got those fleshed out in canon. but yeah this fic/AU is slowly spiraling out of control but i’m just gonna let it at this point. 
#naruto#fanfiction#i swear i just keep thinking of 'oh wouldn't it be sweet if?' and then running w/it#since we know basically nothing in canon about iruka and kotetsu and izumo as genin#i basically just went wild#and now in my AU nobody knows exactly what happened w/them as genin#the biggest mystery after 'how did iruka get his scar?' is 'who was their jounin-sensei?'#the scar theories are all absolutely wild (but i do have the answer in my fic and it involves his early rivalry w/Anko)#and jounin-sensei theories include: a weasel / a nin-cat / the ghost of various shinobi / one of their future selves / a spy /nobody#ppl who guess spy think that it must've been a cover-up and for security reasons#T&I sealed all the info and erased everybody's memories or had them replaced w/ridiculous ones#Anko loves coming up w/increasingly improbable explanations for things#Hayate knows all the secrets and bluntly tells ppl the truth but nobody believes him#they think he keeps getting duped and he needs to be less gullible#like 'hayate you gotta think critically my dude. you can't just believe anything ppl say'#and he's just like 'no but iruka's grandma really is a dragon and her cat taught him fuuinjutsu and izumo can see ghosts–'#and they're just like 'hayate. it's sweet that you believe all of that's true but...you're being duped. this is another mind game.'#and i know in canon Ibiki and Hayate were on the same genin team...so he'd hear all the truths#but then be like 'mmm. no. that's ridiculous buddy. lol. like really? he couldn't come bc his grandma's cat was teaching him fuuinjutsu?#and then like ten years later he's just walking along minding his own business#and he sees Iruka and Naruto at Ichiraku and he can hear them talking to somebody but there's nobody else there#and there's a gruff voice saying 'your sensei here took a whole month to master that seal.'#and ibiki pulls back the flap#and sitting on the 3rd stool w/its own bowl of ramen is a literal cat#it makes eye contact w/him#he drops the flap. walks silently all the way back to T&I and promptly has a minor mental breakdown#he spends the next 3 days flashing through every crazy think hayate ever told him
6 notes · View notes
tessatechaitea · 4 years
Text
The Green Lantern #12
Tumblr media
I don't know why I'm writing a review of this comic book when I know I won't understand it at all.
Tumblr media
Spoken like a ring that has been shoved up Hal's ass as punishment for talking back previously.
That's all you need to know about Hal Jordan's characterization: nobody tells Hal Jordan what to do! Oh wait! Maybe you need a little bit more: sometimes somebody does tell Hal Jordan what to do and then they get punched in the face. Then Hal's ring probably says, "Nobody tells Hal Jordan what to do!" Hal Jordan's anti-matter universe counterpart (who is the Qwa-man, right? No? Maybe?) has been beating the shit out of some second-rate Green Lanterns. One of them can't feel emotions so he's all, "I am dying but super coolly and logically. This is a real matter-of-fact death here. Don't care because I can't. Are these good last words? I can't tell because nothing moves my emotional meter." But Hal Jordan descends on the fight to save the day and not be thanked if he saves the unemotional Green Lantern. "I guess I'm still living. Who cares? I see the world through cold eyes which reveal none of the majesty nor the mystery of the multiverse. It is a compliment when my people yawn in your presence because it means we feel about you the same as we feel about every mote of dust disturbed into motion by every other mote of dust in the universe. In our eyes, you are equal to the most majestic star. Because we couldn't give two fucks about either of you."
Tumblr media
More Green Lanterns that don't matter being dispatched to save the other Green Lanterns that don't matter.
I do recognize one of those Green Lanterns as Medphyl although I know nothing about him except he's plant-like. The Guardians of the Universe are discussing the plan to save the universe from Controller Mu and his Qwa-matter Man. That plan is this: "For the first time in your life, we need you to do exactly as you are told. The rest, Lantern Jordan, the rest will be up to you." Based on what Hal's ring said earlier, I think I sense a flaw in their plan! Sinestro arrives to help Jordan defeat the Qwa-man. Being that I have no idea where in DC Continuity this story takes place, I don't know the specifics of Hal and Sinestro's current relationship. I guess they're reluctant allies? Or Hal is reluctant and Sinestro just gets off on making Hal Jordan need him. It turns out this Sinestro is from the anti-matter universe which means he's the Ace Rimmer of the Sinestro set. And the Qwa-man is the negative Hal Jordan. Everybody tells him what to do and he's pissed. Anti-Sinestro gets wounded giving Hal enough time to get a plan together: punch the Qwa-man in the face over and over and over again. It's the old Hal Jordan special! Before Hal's shield runs out and he and his opposite explode due to anti-matter/matter contact, the Green Lantern cavalry arrives. The Superwatch cavalry also arrives. Plus some creature from the anti-matter universe who's supposed to take the Qwa-man back. But Hal Jordan is as sufficiently confused as I am about how everything is coming together. Maybe he's less confused because he hasn't read dozens of other comic books between each issue of this story, obfuscating the plot because my brain can't keep all the separate threads of all the different comic books separate. Whatever is about to go down, Hal Jordan finds it suspicious. Nobody is getting punched in the face to end the story so something must be wrong! It's totally a trap! But before Hal can save everybody with a bunch of punches, he's caught in a zeta-beam taking him back to Blackstar headquarters. I think that means Grant Morrison was confused by his own story as well and wasn't sure how to end it. Whatever else happened up until this point, it was mostly a scavenger hunt. Hal Jordan helped the Blackstars and Controller Mu collect a bunch of items to create the Miracle Machine. By inserting Hal Jordan into it, he just needs to make one wish to change the universe. And he's supposed to make Controller Mu's wish. I don't remember what that wish was, if it was even ever said. But whatever it is, Hal needs to make it soon or he'll die from injuries sustained battling the Qwa-man. Maybe he's wishing the Green Lanterns away so that the Blackstars can rule the universe? I don't know! Will I continue to read this story in Blackstars #1? Fuck it. Probably. The epilogue shows that the Qwa-man leads a corps of Weaponeers that are the opposite of the Green Lanterns in the anti-matter universe. They're gearing up for war. I guess that's supposed to make me excited for the next chapter of Hal Jordan. It might but I'm a lot like that Green Lantern from earlier that can't feel emotion. I just want to read comic books to pass the time. It's not like I get emotionally invested in them! Unless they star elves and wolves. The Green Lantern #12: If I could sacrifice some extra time I don't really have, I'd reread this entire series until it made sense. Because if I had to bet money on it, I'm sure it makes sense. If my opinion doesn't cost me anything except maybe my reputation, I'd say it doesn't make sense and Grant Morrison is a fucking hack and because of this series, I now believe everything he's ever written was complete nonsense and I fucking fell for it! I'm so fucking gullible and stupid! I bet Alan Moore's writing was just verbal vomit too! And Ellis! Heck, why limit my newfound understanding of the nihilism of writers to just comic books? I bet Danielewski's work has been utter nonsense garbed in profundity! And fucking Steinbeck, that clown! If I read things merely to pass the time and don't give a shit if I get anything out of it, I bet writers write the exact same way! I've been duped my entire life into believing shit mattered! Ugh! I'm such a jerk.
2 notes · View notes
nickgerlich · 5 years
Text
Pay More At Palessi
For many years I have taught my students that price is often used as a surrogate indicator of product quality. The thinking is that the two go hand-in-hand, that if it costs more, it just has to be better.
Of course, there are exceptions, and I always remember to toss in that the law of diminishing returns usually sets in at some point, that consumers begin paying disproportionately more for disproportionately less consumer benefit at the margin.
It is these truths that prompted beleaguered shoe retailer Payless to deploy an epic prank in Santa Monica. Known for its inexpensive shoes, Payless opened a shop called Palessi (Paylessey...Get it? No? OK, never mind) stocked with the same shoes it sells for $20-$40 down the street, but instead jacked the prices up 10-15 times. Voila! Fabulous footwear!
And the customers loved it.
Tumblr media
Shoppers were interviewed and quoted as saying they thought the shoes were of exceptional quality, admiring the styling and other attributes that suddenly became bragging points at those price levels. When you pay $600 for shoes, you expect to be able to wear them not just to protect your feet or look fashionable, but also as a badge reflecting your good taste and wealth. “Oh, my favorite Italian cobbler just got in a small shipment of these beauties. I think he’s all out now. So sorry.”
And when you get those same shoes for $40, you keep your mouth shut.
While Payless came clean after the stunt, and refunded customer money, it shows that customers can be very gullible, and in particular, those who can afford extravagances. That Payless was able to pull this off so easily demonstrates there may something about the insecurities of the rich and their perceived need to buy praise and admiration.
Which is another way of saying that maybe Payless should ditch the old brand, and just come out as Palessi with both guns blazing. Forget the lower-income crowd who need cheap shoes; there’s gold in them thar rich people’s pockets.
I have seen similar tactics used in restaurants, where price and serving portion are typically inverse in relation. It’s all about the presentation of the food on a plate, and the fancy name given to it. Make it look artsy, season with a few foreign words, drizzle some balsamic, then spread lofty terms like “artisanal,” “organic,” and “vegan,” and you can easily charge double for half the portion. Or, you can get a ton of plain Jane comfort food for next to nothing at a big chain.
Don’t believe me? See how much comfort food you can get for $10 at Cracker Barrel or Chili’s, and get back to me.
Although some people, notably some who had been duped, were rather miffed about it all, everyone else seems to think it is rather funny, if not also kind of revealing into the psyche of American consumerism. I’m also betting that some of the folks who normally shop at Payless found it hysterical. Poetic justice was served, but...thankfully...recalled in the end.
Just don’t always assume that a high price means it’s going to be good. Because what you are buying is often just going to your head.
Dr “If The Shoe Fits“ Gerlich
Audio: https://soundcloud.com/nickgerlich/pay-more-at-palessi
18 notes · View notes
LAW # 27 : PLAY ON PEOPLE’S NEED TO BELIEVE TO CREATE A CULTLIKE FOLLOWING
JUDGEMENT
People have an overwhelming desire to believe in something. Become the focal point of such desire by offering them a cause, a new faith to follow. Keep your words vague but full of promise ; emphasize enthusiasm over rationality and clear thinking. Give your new disciples rituals to perform, ask them to make sacrifices on your behalf. In the absence of organized religion and grand causes, your new belief system will bring you untold power.
THE SCIENCE OF CHARLATANISM, OR HOW TO CREATE A CULT IN FIVE EASY STEPS
In searching, as you must, for the methods that will gain you the most power for the least effort, you will find the creation of a cultlike following one of the most effective. Having a large following opens up all sorts of possibilities for deception; not only will your followers worship you, they will defend you from your enemies and will voluntarily take on the work of enticing others to join your fledgling cult. This kind of power will lift you to another realm: You will no longer have to struggle or use subterfuge to enforce your will. You are adored and can do no wrong.
You might think it a gargantuan task to create such a following, but in fact it is fairly simple. As humans, we have a desperate need to believe in something, anything. This makes us eminently gullible: We simply cannot endure long periods of doubt, or of the emptiness that comes from a lack of something to believe in. Dangle in front of us some new cause, elixir, get-rich-quick scheme, or the latest technological trend or art movement and we leap from the water as one to take the bait. Look at history: The chronicles of the new trends and cults that have made a mass following for themselves could fill a library. After a few centuries, a few decades, a few years, a few months, they generally look ridiculous, but at the time they seem so attractive, so transcendental, so divine.
Always in a rush to believe in something, we will manufacture saints and faiths out of nothing. Do not let this gullibility go to waste: Make yourself the object of worship. Make people form a cult around you.
The great European charlatans of the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries mastered the art of cultmaking. They lived, as we do now, in a time of transformation: Organized religion was on the wane, science on the rise. People were desperate to rally around a new cause or faith. The charlatans had begun by peddling health elixirs and alchemic shortcuts to wealth. Moving quickly from town to town, they originally focused on small groups—until, by accident, they stumbled on a truth of human nature: The larger the group they gathered around themselves, the easier it was to deceive.
The charlatan would station himself on a high wooden platform (hence the term “mountebank”) and crowds would swarm around him. In a group setting, people were more emotional, less able to reason. Had the charlatan spoken to them individually, they might have found him ridiculous, but lost in a crowd they got caught up in a communal mood of rapt attention. It became impossible for them to find the distance to be skeptical. Any deficiencies in the charlatan’s ideas were hidden by the zeal of the mass. Passion and enthusiasm swept through the crowd like a contagion, and they reacted violently to anyone who dared to spread a seed of doubt. Both consciously studying this dynamic over decades of experiment and spontaneously adapting to these situations as they happened, the charlatans perfected the science of attracting and holding a crowd, molding the crowd into followers and the followers into a cult.
It was to the charlatan’s advantage that the individuals predisposed to credulity should multiply, that the groups of his adherents should enlarge to mass proportions, guaranteeing an ever greater scope for his triumphs. And this was in fact to occur, as science was popularized, from the Renaissance on down through succeeding centuries. With the immense growth of knowledge and its spread through printing in modern times, the mass of the half educated, the eagerly gullible prey of the quack, also increased, became indeed a majority; real power could be based on their wishes, opinions, preferences, and rejections. The charlatan’s empire accordingly widened with the modern dissemination of knowledge; since he operated on the basis of science, however much he perverted it, producing gold with a technique borrowed from chemistry and his wonderful balsams with the apparatus of medicine, he could not appeal to an entirely ignorant folk. The illiterate would be protected against his absurdities by their healthy common sense. His choicest audience would be composed of the semiliterate, those who had exchanged their common sense for a little distorted information and had encountered science and education at some time, though briefly and unsuccessfully.... The great mass of mankind has always been predisposed to marvel at mysteries, and this was especially true at certain historic periods when the secure foundations of life seemed shaken and old values, economic or spiritual, long accepted as certainties, could no longer be relied upon. Then the numbers of the charlatan’s dupes multiplied—the “self killers,” as a seventeenth-century Englishman called them.
THE POWER OF THE CHARLATAN, GRETE DE FRANCESCO, 1939
The gimmicks of the charlatans may seem quaint today, but there are thousands of charlatans among us still, using the same tried-and-true methods their predecessors refined centuries ago, only changing the names of their elixirs and modernizing the look of their cults. We find these latter-day charlatans in all arenas of life—business, fashion, politics, art. Many of them, perhaps, are following in the charlatan tradition without having any knowledge of its history, but you can be more systematic and deliberate. Simply follow the five steps of cultmaking that our charlatan ancestors perfected over the years.
Step 1: Keep It Vague; Keep It Simple. To create a cult you must first attract attention. This you should do not through actions, which are too clear and readable, but through words, which are hazy and deceptive. Your initial speeches, conversations, and interviews must include two elements: on the one hand the promise of something great and transformative, and on the other a total vagueness. This combination will stimulate all kinds of hazy dreams in your listeners, who will make their own connections and see what they want to see.
To make your vagueness attractive, use words of great resonance but cloudy meaning, words full of heat and enthusiasm. Fancy titles for simple things are helpful, as are the use of numbers and the creation of new words for vague concepts. All of these create the impression of specialized knowledge, giving you a veneer of profundity. By the same token, try to make the subject of your cult new and fresh, so that few will understand it. Done right, the combination of vague promises, cloudy but alluring concepts, and fiery enthusiasm will stir people’s souls and a group will form around you.
Talk too vaguely and you have no credibility. But it is more dangerous to be specific. If you explain in detail the benefits people will gain by following your cult, you will be expected to satisfy them.
As a corollary to its vagueness your appeal should also be simple. Most people’s problems have complex causes: deep-rooted neurosis, interconnected social factors, roots that go way back in time and are exceedingly hard to unravel. Few, however, have the patience to deal with this; most people want to hear that a simple solution will cure their problems. The ability to offer this kind of solution will give you great power and build you a following. Instead of the complicated explanations of real life, return to the primitive solutions of our ancestors, to good old country remedies, to mysterious panaceas.
Step 2: Emphasize the Visual and the Sensual over the Intellectual. Once people have begun to gather around you, two dangers will present themselves: boredom and skepticism. Boredom will make people go elsewhere ; skepticism will allow them the distance to think rationally about whatever it is you are offering, blowing away the mist you have artfully created and revealing your ideas for what they are. You need to amuse the bored, then, and ward off the cynics.
THE OWL WHO WAS GOD
Once upon a starless midnight there was an owl who sat on the branch of an oak tree. Two ground moles tried to slip quietly by, unnoticed. “You!” said the owl. “Who?” they quavered, in fear and astonishment, for they could not believe it was possible for anyone to see them in that thick darkness. “You two!” said the owl. The moles hurried away and told the other creatures of the field and forest that the owl was the greatest and wisest of all animals because he could see in the dark and because he could answer any question. “I’ll see about that,” said a secretary bird, and he called on the owl one night when it was again very dark. “How many claws am I holding up?” said the secretary bird. “Two,” said the owl, and that was right. “Can you give me another expression for ‘that is to say’ or ‘namely?’ ” asked the secretary bird. “To wit,” said the owl. “Why does a lover call on his love?” asked the secretary bird. “To woo,” said the owl. The secretary bird hastened back to the other creatures and reported that the owl was indeed the greatest and wisest animal in the world because he could see in the dark and because he could answer any question.
“Can he see in the daytime, too?” asked a red fox. “Yes,” echoed a dormouse and a French poodle. “Can he see in the daytime, too?” All the other creatures laughed loudly at this silly question, and they set upon the red fox and his friends and drove them out of the region. Then they sent a messenger to the owl and asked him to be their leader. When the owl appeared among the animals it was high noon and the sun was shining brightly. He walked very slowly, which gave him an appearance of great dignity, and he peered about him with large, staring eyes, which gave him an air of tremendous importance. “He’s God!” screamed a Plymouth Rock hen. And the others took up the cry “He’s God!” So they followed him wherever he went and when he began to bump into things they began to bump into things. too. Finally he came to a concrete highway and he started up the middle of it and all the other creatures followed him. Presently a hawk, who was acting as outrider, observed a truck coming toward them at fifty miles an hour, and he reported to the secretary bird and the secretary bird reported to the owl. “There’s danger ahead, ” said the secretary bird. “To wit?” said the owl. The secretary bird told him. “Aren’t you afraid?” He asked. “Who?” said the owl calmly, for he could not see the truck. “He’s God!” cried all the creatures again, and they were still crying “He’s God!” when the truck hit them and ran them down. Some of the animals were merely injured, but most of them, including the owl, were killed. Moral: You can fool too many of the people too much of the time.
THE THURBER CARNIVAL, JAMES THURBER , 1894-1961
The best way to do this is through theater, or other devices of its kind. Surround yourself with luxury, dazzle your followers with visual splendor, fill their eyes with spectacle. Not only will this keep them from seeing the ridiculousness of your ideas, the holes in your belief system, it will also attract more attention, more followers. Appeal to all the senses: Use incense for scent, soothing music for hearing, colorful charts and graphs for the eye. You might even tickle the mind, perhaps by using new technological gadgets to give your cult a pseudo-scientific veneer—as long as you do not make anyone really think. Use the exotic—distant cultures, strange customs—to create theatrical effects, and to make the most banal and ordinary affairs seem signs of something extraordinary.
Step 3: Borrow the Forms of Organized Religion to Structure the Group. Your cultlike following is growing; it is time to organize it. Find a way both elevating and comforting. Organized religions have long held unquestioned authority for large numbers of people, and continue to do so in our supposedly secular age. And even if the religion itself has faded some, its forms still resonate with power. The lofty and holy associations of organized religion can be endlessly exploited. Create rituals for your followers; organize them into a hierarchy, ranking them in grades of sanctity, and giving them names and titles that resound with religious overtones; ask them for sacrifices that will fill your coffers and increase your power. To emphasize your gathering’s quasi-religious nature, talk and act like a prophet. You are not a dictator, after all; you are a priest, a guru, a sage, a shaman, or any other word that hides your real power in the mist of religion.
Step 4: Disguise Your Source of Income. Your group has grown, and you have structured it in a churchlike form. Your coffers are beginning to fill with your followers’ money. Yet you must never be seen as hungry for money and the power it brings. It is at this moment that you must disguise the source of your income.
Your followers want to believe that if they follow you all sorts of good things will fall into their lap. By surrounding yourself with luxury you become living proof of the soundness of your belief system. Never reveal that your wealth actually comes from your followers’ pockets; instead, make it seem to come from the truth of your methods. Followers will copy your each and every move in the belief that it will bring them the same results, and their imitative enthusiasm will blind them to the charlatan nature of your wealth.
Step 5: Set Up an Us-Versus-Them Dynamic. The group is now large and thriving, a magnet attracting more and more particles. If you are not careful, though, inertia will set in, and time and boredom will demagnetize the group. To keep your followers united, you must now do what all religions and belief systems have done: create an us-versus-them dynamic.
First, make sure your followers believe they are part of an exclusive club, unified by a bond of common goals. Then, to strengthen this bond, manufacture the notion of a devious enemy out to ruin you. There is a force of nonbelievers that will do anything to stop you. Any outsider who tries to reveal the charlatan nature of your belief system can now be described as a member of this devious force.
If you have no enemies, invent one. Given a straw man to react against, your followers will tighten and cohere. They have your cause to believe in and infidels to destroy.
OBSERVANCES OF THE LAW
Observance I
In the year 1653, a twenty-seven-year-old Milan man named Francesco Giuseppe Borri claimed to have had a vision. He went around town telling one and all that the archangel Michael had appeared to him and announced that he had been chosen to be the capitano generale of the Army of the New Pope, an army that would seize and revitalize the world. The archangel had further revealed that Borri now had the power to see people’s souls, and that he would soon discover the philosopher’s stone—a long-sought-after substance that could change base metals into gold. Friends and acquaintances who heard Borri explain the vision, and who witnessed the change that had come over him, were impressed, for Borri had previously devoted himself to a life of wine, women, and gambling. Now he gave all that up, plunging himself into the study of alchemy and talking only of mysticism and the occult.
The transformation was so sudden and miraculous, and Borri’s words were so filled with enthusiasm, that he began to create a following. Unfortunately the Italian Inquisition began to notice him as well—they prosecuted anyone who delved into the occult—so he left Italy and began to wander Europe, from Austria to Holland, telling one and all that “to those who follow me all joy shall be granted.” Wherever Borri stayed he attracted followers. His method was simple: He spoke of his vision, which had grown more and more elaborate, and offered to “look into” the soul of anyone who believed him (and they were many). Seemingly in a trance, he would stare at this new follower for several minutes, then claim to have seen the person’s soul, degree of enlightenment, and potential for spiritual greatness. If what he saw showed promise, he would add the person to his growing order of disciples, an honor indeed.
The cult had six degrees, into which the disciples were assigned according to what Borri had glimpsed in their souls. With work and total devotion to the cult they could graduate to a higher degree. Borri—whom they called “His Excellency,” and “Universal Doctor”—demanded from them the strictest vows of poverty. All the goods and moneys they possessed had to be turned over to him. But they did not mind handing over their property, for Borri had told them, “I shall soon bring my chemical studies to a happy conclusion by the discovery of the philosopher’s stone, and by this means we shall all have as much gold as we desire.”
Given his growing wealth, Borri began to change his style of living. Renting the most splendid apartment in the city into which he had temporarily settled, he would furnish it with fabulous furniture and accessories, which he had begun to collect. He would drive through the city in a coach studded with jewels, with six magnificent black horses at its head. He never stayed too long in one place, and when he disappeared, saying he had more souls to gather into his flock, his reputation only grew in his absence. He became famous, although in fact he had never done a single concrete thing.
To become the founder of a new religion one must be psychologically infallible in one’s knowledge of a certain average type of souls who have not yet recognized that they belong together.
FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE, 1844-1900
Men are so simple of mind, and so much dominated by their immediate needs, that a deceitful man will always find plenty who are ready to be deceived.
NICCOLO MACHIAVELLI, 1469-1527
From all over Europe, the blind, the crippled, and the desperate came to visit Borri, for word had spread that he had healing powers. He asked no fee for his services, which only made him seem more marvelous, and indeed some claimed that in this or that city he had performed a miracle cure. By only hinting at his accomplishments, he encouraged people’s imaginations to blow them up to fantastic proportions. His wealth, for example, actually came from the vast sums he was collecting from his increasingly select group of rich disciples; yet it was presumed that he had in fact perfected the philosopher’s stone. The Church continued to pursue him, denouncing him for heresy and witchcraft, and Borri’s response to these charges was a dignified silence; this only enhanced his reputation and made his followers more passionate. Only the great are persecuted, after all; how many understood Jesus Christ in his own time? Borri did not have to say a word—his followers now called the Pope the Antichrist.
And so Borri’s power grew and grew, until one day he left the city of Amsterdam (where he had settled for a while), absconding with huge sums of borrowed money and diamonds that had been entrusted to him. (He claimed to be able to remove the flaws from diamonds through the power of his gifted mind.) Now he was on the run. The Inquisition eventually caught up with him, and for the last twenty years of his life he was imprisoned in Rome. But so great was the belief in his occult powers that to his dying day he was visited by wealthy believers, including Queen Christina of Sweden. Supplying him with money and materials, these visitors allowed him to continue his search for the elusive philosopher’s stone. Interpretation
THE TEMPLE OF HEALTH
[In the late 1780s] the Scottish quack James Graham... was winning a large following and great riches in London.... [Graham] maintained a show of great scientific technique. In 1772 ... he had visited Philadelphia, where he met Benjamin Franklin and became interested in the latter’s experiments with electricity. These appear to have inspired the apparatus in the “Temple of Health,”
the fabulous establishment he opened in London for the sale of his elixirs.... In the chief room, where he received patients, stood “the largest air pump in the world” to assist him in his “philosophical investigations” into disease, and also a “stupendous metallic conductor,” a richly gilded pedestal surrounded with retorts and vials of “etherial and other essences.” ... According to J. Ennemoser, who published a history of magic in 1844 at Leipzig, Graham’s “house... united the useful with the pleasurable. Everywhere the utmost magnificence was displayed. Even in the outer court, averred an eye-witness, it seemed as though art, invention, and riches had been exhausted. On the side walls in the chambers an arc-shaped glow was provided by artificial electric light; star rays darted forth; transparent glasses of all colors were placed with clever selection and much taste. All this, the same eyewitness assures us, was ravishing and exalted the imagination to the highest degree.” Visitors were given a printed sheet of rules for healthy living. In the Great Apollo Apartment they might join in mysterious rituals, accompanied by chants : “Hail, Vital Air, aethereal ! Magnetic Magic, hail !” And while they hailed the magic of magnetism, the windows were darkened, revealing a ceiling studded with electric stars and a young and lovely “Rosy Goddess of Health” in a niche.... Every evening this Temple of Health was crowded with guests; it had become the fashion to visit it and try the great twelve-foot bed of state, the “Grand Celestial Bed,” said to cure any disease.... This bed, according to Ennemoser, “stood in a splendid room, into which a cylinder led from an adjoining chamber to conduct the healing currents... at the same time all sorts of pleasing scents of strengthening herbs and Oriental incense were also brought in through glass tubes. The heavenly bed itself rested upon six solid transparent pillars; the bedclothes were of purple and sky-blue Atlas silk, spread over a mattress saturated with Arabian perfumed waters to suit the tastes of the Persian court. The chamber in which it was placed he called the Sanctum Sanctorum.... To add to all this, there were the melodious notes of the harmonica, soft flutes, agreeable voices, and a great organ.”
THE POWER OF THE CHARLATAN, GRETE DE FRANCESCO, 1939
Before he formed his cult, Borri seems to have stumbled on a critical discovery. Tiring of his life of debauchery, he had decided to give it up and to devote himself to the occult, a genuine interest of his. He must have noticed, however, that when he alluded to a mystical experience (rather than physical exhaustion) as the source of his conversion, people of all classes wanted to hear more. Realizing the power he could gain by ascribing the change to something external and mysterious, he went further with his manufactured visions. The grander the vision, and the more sacrifices he asked for, the more appealing and believable his story seemed to become.
Remember: People are not interested in the truth about change. They do not want to hear that it has come from hard work, or from anything as banal as exhaustion, boredom, or depression; they are dying to believe in something romantic, otherworldly. They want to hear of angels and out-of-body experiences. Indulge them. Hint at the mystical source of some personal change, wrap it in ethereal colors, and a cultlike following will form around you. Adapt to people’s needs: The messiah must mirror the desires of his followers. And always aim high. The bigger and bolder your illusion, the better.
Observance II
In the mid-1700s, word spread in Europe’s fashionable society of a Swiss country doctor named Michael Schüppach who practiced a different kind of medicine: He used the healing powers of nature to perform miraculous cures. Soon well-to-do people from all over the Continent, their ailments both serious and mild, were making the trek to the alpine village of Langnau, where Schüppach lived and worked. Trudging through the mountains, these visitors witnessed the most dramatic natural landscapes that Europe has to offer. By the time they reached Langnau, they were already feeling transformed and on their way to health.
Schüppach, who had become known as simply the “Mountain Doctor,” had a small pharmacy in town. This place became quite a scene: Crowds of people from many different countries would cram the small room, its walls lined with colorful bottles filled with herbal cures. Where most doctors of the time prescribed foul-tasting concoctions that bore incomprehensible Latin titles (as medicines often do still), Schüppach’s cures had names such as “The Oil of Joy,” “Little Flower’s Heart,” or “Against the Monster,” and they tasted sweet and pleasing.
Visitors to Langnau would have to wait patiently for a visit with the Mountain Doctor, because every day some eighty messengers would arrive at the pharmacy bearing flasks of urine from all over Europe. Schüppach claimed he could diagnose what ailed you simply by looking at a sample of your urine and reading a written description of your ailment. (Naturally he read the description very carefully before prescribing a cure.) When he finally had a spare minute (the urine samples took up much of his time), he would call the visitor into his office in the pharmacy. He would then examine this person’s urine sample, explaining that its appearance would tell him everything he needed to know. Country people had a sense for these things, he would say—their wisdom came from living a simple, godly life with none of the complications of urban living. This personal consultation would also include a discussion as to how one might bring one’s soul more into harmony with nature.
Schüppach had devised many forms of treatment, each profoundly unlike the usual medical practices of the time. He was a believer, for instance, in electric shock therapy. To those who wondered whether this was in keeping with his belief in the healing power of nature, he would explain that electricity is a natural phenomenon; he was merely imitating the power of lightning. One of his patients claimed to be inhabited by seven devils. The doctor cured him with electrical shocks, and as he administered these he exclaimed that he could see the devils flying out of the man’s body, one by one. Another man claimed to have swallowed a hay wagon and its driver, which were causing him massive pains in the chest. The Mountain Doctor listened patiently, claimed to be able to hear the crack of a whip in the man’s belly, promised to cure him, and gave him a sedative and a purgative. The man fell asleep on a chair outside the pharmacy. As soon as he awoke he vomited, and as he vomited a hay wagon sped past him (the Mountain Doctor had hired it for the occasion), the crack of its whip making him feel that somehow he had indeed expelled it under the doctor’s care.
Over the years, the Mountain Doctor’s fame grew. He was consulted by the powerful—even the writer Goethe made the trek to his village—and he became the center of a cult of nature in which everything natural was considered worthy of worship. Schüppach was careful to create effects that would entertain and inspire his patients. A professor who visited him once wrote, “One stands or sits in company, one plays cards, sometimes with a young woman; now a concert is given, now a lunch or supper, and now a little ballet is presented. With a very happy effect, the freedom of nature is everywhere united with the pleasures of the beau monde, and if the doctor is not able to heal any diseases, he can at least cure hypochondria and the vapors.”
Interpretation
Schüppach had begun his career as an ordinary village doctor. He would sometimes use in his practice some of the village remedies he had grown up with, and apparently he noticed some results, for soon these herbal tinctures and natural forms of healing became his specialty. And in fact his natural form of healing did have profound psychological effects on his patients. Where the normal drugs of the time created fear and pain, Schüppach’s treatments were comfortable and soothing. The resulting improvement in the patient’s mood was a critical element in the cures he brought about. His patients believed so deeply in his skills that they willed themselves into health. Instead of scoffing at their irrational explanations for their ailments, Schüppach used their hypochondria to make it seem that he had effected a great cure.
The case of the Mountain Doctor teaches us valuable lessons in the creation of a cultlike following. First, you must find a way to engage people’s will, to make their belief in your powers strong enough that they imagine all sorts of benefits. Their belief will have a self-fulfilling quality, but you must make sure that it is you, rather than their own will, who is seen as the agent of transformation. Find the belief, cause, or fantasy that will make them believe with a passion and they will imagine the rest, worshipping you as healer, prophet, genius, whatever you like.
Second, Schüppach teaches us the everlasting power of belief in nature, and in simplicity. Nature, in reality, is full of much that is terrifying—poisonous plants, fierce animals, sudden disasters, plagues. Belief in the healing, comforting quality of nature is really a constructed myth, a romanticism. But the appeal to nature can bring you great power, especially in complicated and stressful times.
This appeal, however, must be handled right. Devise a kind of theater of nature in which you, as the director, pick and choose the qualities that fit the romanticism of the times. The Mountain Doctor played the part to perfection, playing up his homespun wisdom and wit, and staging his cures as dramatic pieces. He did not make himself one with nature; instead he molded nature into a cult, an artificial construction. To create a “natural” effect you actually have to work hard, making nature theatrical and delightfully pagan. Otherwise no one will notice. Nature too must follow trends and be progressive.
Observance III
In 1788, at the age of fifty-five, the doctor and scientist Franz Mesmer was at a crossroads. He was a pioneer in the study of animal magnetism—the belief that animals contain magnetic matter, and that a doctor or specialist can effect miraculous cures by working on this charged substance—but in Vienna, where he lived, his theories had met with scorn and ridicule from the medical establishment. In treating women for convulsions, Mesmer claimed to have worked a number of cures, his proudest achievement being the restoration of sight to a blind girl. But another doctor who examined the young girl said she was as blind as ever, an assessment with which she herself agreed. Mesmer countered that his enemies were out to slander him by winning her over to their side. This claim only elicited more ridicule. Clearly the sober-minded Viennese were the wrong audience for his theories, and so he decided to move to Paris and start again.
Renting a splendid apartment in his new city, Mesmer decorated it appropriately. Stained glass in most of the windows created a religious feeling, and mirrors on all the walls produced an hypnotic effect. The doctor advertised that in his apartment he would give demonstrations of the powers of animal magnetism, inviting the diseased and melancholic to feel its powers. Soon Parisians of all classes (but mostly women, who seemed more attracted to the idea than men did) were paying for entry to witness the miracles that Mesmer promised.
Inside the apartment, the scents of orange blossom and exotic incense wafted through special vents. As the initiates filtered into the salon where the demonstrations took place, they heard harp music and the lulling sounds of a female vocalist coming from another room. In the center of the salon was a long oval container filled with water that Mesmer claimed had been magnetized. From holes in the container’s metal lid protruded long movable iron rods. The visitors were instructed to sit around the container, place these magnetized rods on the body part that gave them pains or problems, and then hold hands with their neighbors, sitting as close as possible to one another to help the magnetic force pass between their bodies. Sometimes, too, they were attached to each other by cords.
THE POWER OF A LIE
In the town of Tarnopol lived a man by the name of Reb Feivel. One day, as he sat in his house deeply-absorbed in his Talmud, he heard a loud noise outside. When he went to the window he saw a lot of little pranksters. “Up to some new piece of mischief, no doubt.” he thought. “Children, run quickly to the synagogue,” he cried, leaning out and improvising the first story that occurred to him. “You’ll see there a sea monster, and what a monster ! It’s a creature with five feet, three eyes, and a beard like that of a goat, only it’s green !”
And sure enough the children scampered off and Reb Feivel returned to his studies. He smiled into his beard as he thought of the trick he had played on those little rascals. It wasn’t long before his studies were interrupted again, this time by running footsteps. When he went to the window he saw several Jews running. “Where are you running ?” he called out.
“To the synagogue !” answered the Jews. “Haven’t you heard? There’s a sea monster, there’s a creature with five legs, three eyes, and a beard like that of a goat, only it’s green !” Reb Feivel laughed with glee, thinking of the trick he had played, and sat down again to his Talmud. But no sooner had he begun to concentrate when suddenly he heard a dinning tumult outside. And what did he see? A great crowd of men, women and children, all running toward the synagogue. “What’s up?” he cried, sticking his head out of the window.
“What a question! Why, don’t you know?” they answered. “Right in front of the synagogue there’s a sea monster. It’s a creature with five legs, three eyes, and a beard like that of a goat, only it’s green!”
And as the crowd hurried by, Reb Feivel suddenly noticed that the rabbi himself was among them.
“Lord of the world!” he exclaimed. “If the rabbi himself is running with them surely there must be something happening. Where there’s smoke there’s fire!” Without further thought Reb Feivel grabbed his hat, left his house, and also began running. “Who can tell?” he muttered to himself as he ran, all out of breath, toward the synagogue.
A TREASURY OF JEWISH FOLKLORE, NATHAN AUSUBEL, ED., 1948
Mesmer would leave the room, and “assistant magnetizers”—all handsome and strapping young men—would enter with jars of magnetized water that they would sprinkle on the patients, rubbing the healing fluid on their bodies, massaging it into their skin, moving them toward a trancelike state. And after a few minutes a kind of delirium would overcome the women. Some would sob, some would shriek and tear their hair, others would laugh hysterically. At the height of the delirium Mesmer would reenter the salon, dressed in a flowing silk robe embroidered with golden flowers and carrying a white magnetic rod. Moving around the container, he would stroke and soothe the patients until calm was restored. Many women would later attribute the strange power he had on them to his piercing look, which, they thought, was exciting or quieting the magnetic fluids in their bodies.
Within months of his arrival in Paris, Mesmer became the rage. His supporters included Marie-Antoinette herself, the queen of France, wife of Louis XVI. As in Vienna, he was condemned by the official faculty of medicine, but it did not matter. His growing following of pupils and patients paid him handsomely.
Mesmer expanded his theories to proclaim that all humanity could be brought into harmony through the power of magnetism, a concept with much appeal during the French Revolution. A cult of Mesmerism spread across the country; in many towns, “Societies of Harmony” sprang up to experiment with magnetism. These societies eventually became notorious: They tended to be led by libertines who would turn their sessions into a kind of group orgy.
At the height of Mesmer’s popularity, a French commission published a report based on years of testing the theory of animal magnetism. The conclusion: Magnetism’s effects on the body actually came from a kind of group hysteria and autosuggestion. The report was well documented, and ruined Mesmer’s reputation in France. He left the country and went into retirement. Only a few years later, however, imitators sprang up all over Europe and the cult of Mesmerism spread once again, its believers more numerous than ever.
Interpretation
Mesmer’s career can be broken into two parts. When still in Vienna, he clearly believed in the validity of his theory, and did all he could to prove it. But his growing frustration and the disapproval of his colleagues made him adopt another strategy. First he moved to Paris, where no one knew him, and where his extravagant theories found a more fruitful soil. Then he appealed to the French love of theater and spectacle, making his apartment into a kind of magical world in which a sensory overload of smells, sights, and sounds entranced his customers. Most important, from now on he practiced his magnetism only on a group. The group provided the setting in which the magnetism would have its proper effect, one believer infecting the other, overwhelming any individual doubter.
Mesmer thus passed from being a confirmed advocate of magnetism to the role of a charlatan using every trick in the book to captivate the public. The biggest trick of all was to play on the repressed sexuality that bubbles under the surface of any group setting. In a group, a longing for social unity, a longing older than civilization, cries out to be awakened. This desire may be subsumed under a unifying cause, but beneath it is a repressed sexuality that the charlatan knows how to exploit and manipulate for his own purposes.
This is the lesson that Mesmer teaches us: Our tendency to doubt, the distance that allows us to reason, is broken down when we join a group. The warmth and infectiousness of the group overwhelm the skeptical individual. This is the power you gain by creating a cult. Also, by playing on people’s repressed sexuality, you lead them into mistaking their excited feelings for signs of your mystical strength. You gain untold power by working on people’s unrealized desire for a kind of promiscuous and pagan unity.
Remember too that the most effective cults mix religion with science. Take the latest technological trend or fad and blend it with a noble cause, a mystical faith, a new form of healing. People’s interpretations of your hybrid cult will run rampant, and they will attribute powers to you that you had never even thought to claim.
Image: The Magnet. An unseen force draws objects to it, which in turn become magnetized themselves, drawing other pieces to them, the magnetic power of the whole constantly increasing. But take away the original magnet and it all falls apart. Become the magnet, the invisible force that attracts people’s imaginations and holds them together. Once they have clustered around you, no power can wrest them away.
Authority: The charlatan achieves his great power by simply opening a possibility for men to believe what they already want to believe.... The credulous cannot keep at a distance; they crowd around the wonder worker, entering his personal aura, surrendering themselves to illusion with a heavy solemnity, like cattle. (Grete de Francesco)
REVERSAL
One reason to create a following is that a group is often easier to deceive than an individual, and turns over to you that much more power. This comes, however, with a danger: If at any moment the group sees through you, you will find yourself facing not one deceived soul but an angry crowd that will tear you to pieces as avidly as it once followed you. The charlatans constantly faced this danger, and were always ready to move out of town as it inevitably became clear that their elixirs did not work and their ideas were sham. Too slow and they paid with their lives. In playing with the crowd, you are playing with fire, and must constantly keep an eye out for any sparks of doubt, any enemies who will turn the crowd against you. When you play with the emotions of a crowd, you have to know how to adapt, attuning yourself instantaneously to all of the moods and desires that a group will produce. Use spies, be on top of everything, and keep your bags packed.
For this reason you may often prefer to deal with people one by one. Isolating them from their normal milieu can have the same effect as putting them in a group—it makes them more prone to suggestion and intimidation. Choose the right sucker and if he eventually sees through you he may prove easier to escape than a crowd.
8 notes · View notes
lunakinesis · 7 years
Text
Fathoms Below
Tumblr media
Seafarers have been telling each other stories of monsters of the deep for as long as humanity has been crossing the waves.
Many of these tales can be written off as simply the wondrous work of the human imagination, failing that they could be the eyes of a tired sailor deceiving him or her, perhaps still just mistaken identity. Lord knows humans have coined some truly odd creatures due to mis-remembering appearance in the days before cameras.
Some, however, are true.
Outside of monstrous sea-serpents lurking in the depths of the ocean, the most prominent of all tales is that of mermaids. Merfolk if you want to be general and inclusive, but the majority of stories revolve around the female members of the various species. Humanity seems to have been always fixated on their potential watery cousins.
Tales of Merrow, Selkies, Sirens – though not actually merfolk they often get grouped in with them – and the others have always amused me. Mostly because it shows the gullibility of humans when confronted with something that looks and sounds attractive. Humans pride themselves on being such an intelligent species, so far above and more evolved than others on the planet. Yet they are easily duped by a pretty face and sweet words.
The sea is calm today, too much so in fact. There is barely a breeze and the surface waters are hardly stirring beyond the usual tidal pull. I suppose it's harder to imagine monsters in the fathoms below on a day like this now. In days gone by such weather would have been equally disastrous as a heavy storm as it would've left ships stranded far from land with their sails useless. Some were fortunate enough to possess oars for rowing, others not. If the eerily calm weather persisted for too long, those ships may not have been found until it was too late for the crew. Some still remain lost, and may do so forever.
For the ships and other vessels of today, such stillness is not even an inconvenience with their powerful motors and engines. They no longer rely on the winds and currents to get them to their destination.
Most of them, at least.
Yachts and other sailing boats need those elements. Without them, well... The coastguard doesn't always arrive in time to prevent a tragedy. Sometimes this baffles them, the media, the public... all because they weren't that far from rescue and the weather was fine.
How do crews vanish in calm waters less than two hours after they radioed in for help? How do heavily supplied vessels end up adrift, abandoned, with no sign of structural damage to the boat or other distress visible? These cases often go unexplained forever. Unless you talk to the jaded, old seafolk. They have seen and heard things those who spend their lives on land will never accept as truth, yet they know in their hearts and minds there is something out there in the oceans. MANY somethings, just waiting for the next foolish human to come along.
Why am I telling you all of this?
I can hear the approach of another ship, that's why. No doubt it's the coastguard here to do their job. I always did hate the sound of motorised boats. The sound travels for miles across open water. Dreadful things that so often leave dead sea creatures in their wake. It's not like they care if they hit a dolphin or sea lion. Or in the case of bigger ships, they don't care if all matter of sea life is pulled into their propellers and chopped to bits. They don't even notice. I have always found such casually disregard for life distasteful, but typical of humanity.
Which is why I take the ones I can, like all my brothers and sisters do. You pollute our home, spill your oil and waste into it, leave stretches of our waters barren from your fishing, and leave countless beautiful beasts tangled in your nets and decimated by your boats.
A few centuries ago, you weren't such a problem to deal with. Many of us occasionally walked on land amongst you, fascinated by our curious, inventive land-locked cousin. But now with all your technology and growth, you are a parasite upon this planet, draining everything from it to further sustain yourselves. Damning every other living thing and yourselves in the process.
We were content to toy with you all those years ago, take only those that directly threatened or crossed us to keep our people safe.
No longer.
These waters are ours, and we are taking them back.
Perhaps this man had never committed any great wrong against us, but he exists within a society self-destructing its home and the glass bottle he threw over his vessel's edge sunk down in the murk as I swam by. Another thing to litter our home, another pollutant. Another disregard for the lives o oceanbound creatures.
He was easy enough to lure. You humans don't think clearly when in shock. All he saw was a woman screaming for help. It didn't matter that it made no sense for her to be out here with no other boats for miles. He saw a distressed, naked woman struggling to keep her head above the water and saw a chance to be a hero.
Foolish.
He should never have left his boat.
The cold of the water was a shock to his alcohol-filled system. No doubt the sight of my gilled throat, scaled tail and sharp-toothed grin were too. He tried to swim away, but you humans are not made for the water. So slow and cumbersome. Clothed legs do not make for a good swimmer and he was easily within my grasp in a second.
He struggle and thrashed, attracting both sharks and more of my kind from the blue murk. The sharks would bide their time, circling below, waiting for him to succumb. He tried to pry himself from my grasp, but we're far stronger than you are. Our bodies are made to survive the frigid temperatures and high pressures of the deep. A jellyfish attempting to resist a turtle would've had more luck.
I pulled him under just as I heard that distant rumble. Sound travels so far once under the water, you see. My arms clutched him tightly against my chest, head pressed against my breast. A deadly embrace. Bubbles streamed up from him, his eyes wide with fear and mouth gaping, only enabling more water to flood into him.
It was not long before he was motionless in my arms. We were far enough below to go unseen but still make out the shadows of his rescue vessel above. I released him, letting him sink down as the sharks began to close in. He would not go to waste, what they did not eat other scavengers would.
My siblings began to rise to the surface. We know these humans. They are like the jaded captains and fishers who know the sea holds horrors and mysteries, and would not be so easily fooled.
As I closed in on the surface myself, I heard human shouts give way to a beautiful chorus from my kindred. A serenade for the drowned. Our voices have always been our best defence against your kind.
Entranced by the singing of my siblings, one by one my victim's rescuers took hold of my siblings hands and were pulled under until the sole female crew member remained. My brother approached the boat, closer than most of us dared, his webbed hand reaching up towards the glazed-eyed female as her own calloused fingers reached out to him. That enchanting voice whispering the last thing many of you who cross us hear.
"Come away to the water with me."
96 notes · View notes
Text
bulk
~~mod~~ OK here’s the bulk. ill add to the comments.  Before anyone asks my opinion on it or how i feel about it ill just say it.. I don’t care and Im not bothered by it,  I haven’t liked her for a very long time due to how she treated a close friend of mine, them together doesn’t change my fan-ness of him.   I know that there are others that don’t care some that are happy for him and i know that there are a large number of people out there you are angry , hurt and devastated. I get it and i want you all to be able to express that, but do me a favor and respects each others feelings and opinions and keep it medium.
Anon: I am devastated Mod. He lied to us. Blatantly and I will never forgive him for that. I can’t even look at anything he is in ever again. I just can’t believe I trusted him as much as I did. I believed his words when he spoke. Now I don’t know him at all. He is NOTHING like what he says he is. I hope they are ripped apart by media because he deserves everything now. It hurts me so much to say that because I used to defend everything about him. I don’t even know what to say about him now.
Brandi:Let’s tease this NR DK thing out a little. Anon:First off, good for Norman. She’s age appropriate and has some understanding of the entertainment industry and the pitfalls of it. AnonThat said, Norman works eight months out of the year in rural Georgia and works a ton outside of TWD. DK works predominantly in Europe. (I believe) When the heck are these two actually going to see each other? Anon:If her bad behaviour toward her fans/coworkers is to be believed, Norman may have trouble with this. Reedus is incredibly kind to people/fans, if she is rude to them, it might not go well for her, in Norman’s eyes. Anon:The earlier denial of his romance with DK is similar to what happened with CS. Did he not deny they where more than friends for ages?! I can’t blame him, I think he was protecting her, people where really hard on that girl. Anon:Just my two cents. Shine on you crazy diamonds.
Anon::My friend got it on good authority that Daryl will DIE in S8 because of all the negative publicity caused by NR sneaking around w/ DK. 😢 That he “came out” with their relationship per those photos taken in NYC last night to try to make himself look honorable. But AMC had already decided to kill him off bcause of the bad fan reaction to his affair with DK–denying it and such. AMC just now informed NR that Daryl will die in a battle w/ Negan. Totally crying right now. This cannot be true!?!?! 😭
Anon:He’s drunk in those pictures. He doesn’t look happy only drunk and nasty. It’s disgusting marching down the street being something he always claimed to hate. I’m done with him. Anon:Norman is completely full of bullshit.
normieslittletwign :  Well, I guess they’re official. The only thing that disappoints me is how it was handled. They should have “come out” as a couple right at the beginning and let the chips fall where they may. She could have said that her relationship with JJ was on the rocks for some time, that they’d been leading separate lives for awhile… whatever…. make shit up!! They’re only human and shit happens, the heart wants what the heart wants. IDK   But now Norman is (or may be) seen as a homewrecker. She may be seen as a cheater all because no one knows when this relationship started.   To be caught mere weeks after releasing an “official statement” that they are “just friends”… SMH. The pics are *not* of people who are “just friends”.   I also feel for fans who have put Norman up on such a high pedestal… they must be devastated!!   For the record, I’m still a fan of and still like Norman. He has a very unique personality, I quite like his acting and a number of his movies, not to mention TWD. But then again, I never put him on a pedestal and read too much into his interviews. I most likely will never meet the guy and I’m OK with that. And if I did, I’d just be another fan who wants a pic or an autograph.   To be honest, I’ve never wanted to meet *any* celebrity. I’m one of the biggest Iron Maiden fans around (36 years and counting… am I aging myself? lol) and if I go to my grave having never met any of the members of Iron Maiden (or any other band or actor I admire) it won’t bother me a bit. But that’s probably just me.   You know, God himself could hand pick a lovely woman for Norman and she still wouldn’t be seen as being good enough for him by the “lunatic-fringe” fans.  Now to sit back and watch the shit-storm. I’ve noticed on Norman’s Instagram he’s already feeling the heat… sadly.
dixonimagines:On the DK thing: Are they f*cking 13 years olds, making out in a street corner like they can’t rent a hotel room? I enjoyed meeting him this year but I will never again pay another cent to meet him. Not only is he a liar but also freaking dumb one. Why lie when he knew he would be outed sooner or later? I do not feel betrayed but I cannot continue being a fan of someone who is dumb enough to put his fandom at risk for a fling with some woman. He is no better than most of us.
Anon:i don’t particularly like DK, but I also don’t think she’s the evil bitch that some make her out to be. Whatever their relationship is, it’s theirs to explore and pursue. N looks happy in the pics and that’s good enough for me. I’m actually more concerned about Mod being bombarded with the Insanity 😰Sending you 🥃🥃🥃🥃🥃, Mod, stay gold!
Anon:I feel like this has been explained ad nauseum (though ppl choose not to listen) but *some* fans are upset this couple began by breaking up Diane’s 10+ yr relationship. So it was cheating then 2+ years lying, with fans defending him against cheating rumors. Is it really that hard to understand that some may take it personally because they defended him, or because they’ve experienced relationships broken by cheating? “As long as the cheaters are happy who cares” is a rather ignorant response.
Anon:Can I just point out how happy Norman looks in the pics with DK? Anyone who can make Norman’s smile that wide is good with me. I wish them so much happiness ❤
Anon:Did pR’s reps genuinely not know he was seeing DK? The just friends comment is making less and less sense 🙈
Anon:To all those defending Norman saying he is entitled to a private life YES he is. But these shots were staged for the paps, he has chosen to forgo his privacy, and expect more like this to come. Everyone in the industry knows these types of relationships are biz deals, he couldn’t give a fuc what anyone thinks, he is as hollywood, elite and privileged as they come. He does not deserve defending. So many of his fans so naive and gullible.
Anon:for people that are saying ‘oh get over it’ or 'why taking this so personally’ its not that the question. Norman lied since day one when it came to all this mess. He lied that he didnt cheat JJ with her. He lied when said they were just friends 3 weeks ago. he lied when he said he loves honest people. he lied when he said he doesnt understand cheating…i mean this is years and years of lies and people believing he was one thing when he was other. its too many lies
Anon:Lol honestly I’m not even his fan and i feel like i could cut a bitch now because i was here trying to prove that he was better than the rumors that were always circling around. I saw on him a good guy trying to break bad habits and i feel fucking offended with this! lol i mean he is a 48 year old men why lie? he didnt need all of this…unless he had another thing going (which we all know its rumored to have) and someone dropped someone and he went on the easy root. sad excuse of a man sorry.
Anon:Now i get why he is friend with Balthazar Getty, which in my opinion, is the ultimate douchebag of Hollywood….Norman is exactly the same. Nobody cant deny people..he is a  sleezy liar. Hope he likes to see his daily life on daily mail from now on.
Anon:the fact that norman played the game of the 'honest'person and he hates liars makes me sick. He lied to everyone. No he doesnt owns us anything but he denied any romantic link with her 3 weeks ago. this to me is beyond ridiculous. I guess she got what she wanted and he once again is going along because its comfortable to him and guarantee he have his dick wet at least once a week…but the rest?? i feel sorry for the fans that always believed how good guy and true to himself he was.
Anon:I guess I have mixed feelings about the whole DK relationship. He does look really happy and I personally don’t care who he is with. But why all the sneaking around and lying? I can only think of one reason they would do that. They wanted to make the cheating rumors look untrue. To me the cheating rumors now look true. I am still a fan of his but I don’t think I will spend the money to see him if he comes to the Walker Stalker near me.
Anon:They are both scum. Anon:Up till now I always gave him the benefit of the doubt, but I feel like the biggest fool alive now. He really is a LIAR!! Yuck, so disappointed in him 😳.
Anon:I just feel sorry for the people that believed in him. They have been duped/snowed/hoodwinked by a professional liar and all around horrible person.
Anon:Let’s Please try to not make Norman and DK’s relationship about us. It has nothing to do with lying to fans, manipulating fans, or laughing at fans. There’s no personal insult to his fans here. It’s just them letting the world know on their terms, not ours. In other news, I’m so glad he looks happy. His kid is growing up, his job has got to be ending in the next few years (sorry but that’s just reality), and he deserves some joy as he figures out what to do next.
Anon:I truly don’t get all the DK hate. And w/ those pics coming out today, I’m sure it will only get worse. How about everyone just be glad he’s in an age appropriate relationship this time? I mean, I can’t be the only one who was completely grossed out by the 18 year old, right?
Anon:I am completely done with him. I gave him the benefit of the doubt for so long and I am mostly an optimistic person…But this is just disgusting. IDC who he dates tbh…But this snake???? And the cheating??? Breaks my heart. It’s awesome that he gives his all to his fans but I think it feeds his narcissistic ways. Sorry Norman…You will live your life whatever you want to…You’re a grown man (sometimes)
Anon:Sending you tons of nachos and lots of alcohol for the incoming shitstorm. If you need anything else let me know.
Anon:I just did a google searched on the latest on NR, and there is a picture of what appears to be N kissing DK right in plain view of a pap. Rather this is the real deal or simply a PR move on behalf of DK herself, N and D are together. Love it or hate it, we don’t have a say in who he dates and I personally wouldn’t want to because I wouldn’t want people to do the same to me.
Anon:Sorry something is not right , your people denied the rumours 3 weeks ago and then you come out hand in hand with her , plus it doesnt look kissing to me but ok , im dissapointed in him , but i will still be a daryl fan !
meags672:This night out was obviously their 'coming out’. They both look very happy to me! Good for them. Its about time!
Anon::Ohhhh mod. ALL OF THE WHISKEY AND NACHOS FOR YOU!!!! Anon:It’s official. Norman is a cheater and liar. They are both gross and deserve each other. They deserve every ounce of hate they get. #shittypeople Anon:its confirmed, they are a couple. bye bye norman. i don’t support lying little cheating sneaks
superleeleehipster:I am sending two bottles of whiskey your way and some nachos… followed by chocolate cause this is gonna get crazy for another week :p
Anon:So umm… how are Norman’s reps gonna say they’re “just friends” again when there are pics of them holding hands and making out? Anon:Those “just friends” look very very happy. I think you all should be happy for him.
Anon:she went to paris to support her friend, just friends, that what friends do, right. but not the show in spain bc why. tho she goes out so ppl see her there. no pap or fan shots of her in fr or ger. why none in ny until some of him show up. guess they r friends who dont hang out in public. btw why never any fan pics of her any where, does she not have fans. just pap shots around him
Anon:Bye bye Norman. You’re canceled. It’s official, they are together. Eonline posted pics of them kissing and holding hands while smiling and walking around in NYC yesterday. They really made it official after denying everything just three weeks ago. It makes me so sick to see DK all happy. Disgusting ain’t even a damn word about what I feel
Anon:Norman died for me. Did you see the eonline pics? He’s holding hands and kissing DK in PUBLIC. They walked around and had the biggest smiles on their faces. What an incredible disgusting piece of trash Norman is. Disappointment is not even a word how I feel right now. Sorry if I’m going to unfollow you but I don’t want to see anything about him anymore.
Anon:Seriously not a fan any longer. You can date who you want, but why lie about it 3 weeks before going public? That makes you shady in my book and I don’t support shady people.
197 notes · View notes
Text
Aug. 12 letters to the editor, Part 1
New Post has been published on http://funnythingshere.xyz/aug-12-letters-to-the-editor-part-1/
Aug. 12 letters to the editor, Part 1
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Peter Principle at work
By what convoluted logic do Trump and his misguided misogynistic Reeperbub cronies justify the continuation of the macho practice of denying equal pay to qualified women being paid less than their no more qualified male counterparts in the workforce?
Is this another application of the Peter Principle? (If you got one, you qualify for more pay; if you don’t got one, you are SOL.)
Marco Munez
Trump’s ‘fake news’ is really just his own lies
I think I figured something out this week. This came about while I was watching the television news playing numerous, and I mean numerous, segments about how much President Donald Trump lies, which I personally find sad, since I have the greatest respect for the office of the Presidency.
Now, of course, the president’s official “explainers” … were hard at work trying to take the edge off of the lies, but the problem is the press is getting smarter and they are finding the lies. …
Since so many of these lies were said in public, where they were heard and recorded by numerous human beings, it is a bit hard to deny them. Nonetheless, the president continues to do so, evidently depending on what he thinks is the gullibility of the American public.
Anyway, I said I figured out something and that is that we must have been misinterpreting the term “fake news” this whole time. Listening to all of the president’s lies, I conclude that, when he carries on about “fake news,” he must be referring to his own statements, and the “fake news” is the plethora of lies he keeps spewing out.
… The president doesn’t have to lie all of the time. Once in a while, he needs to just be humble enough to admit that he made a mistake. I know that is an idea which is stunning in its simplicity, but think about it. It would be a breath of fresh air.
Danny Radakovich
Imposing fear on the weak-minded
In regard to the letter of July 19 by Keith Lunders titled “Getting conned.”
He related a bad experience from his past military life when he was duped out of money by Mexicans who hung around the barracks door. I also underwent basic training at Lackland Air Force Bace just a few years before Keith was there, and I don’t remember any “mob of Mexican kids” hanging around any of the barracks.
But assuming that Keith was relating a truthful account from his early life, I find it interesting that Keith would use this one incident that happened many years ago to infer that “all” Mexicans and “all” people from Central America are a bunch of shysters and crimminals.
One time I was treated badly by a policeman when I was 8 years old. Without any evidence to back him up, he came down hard on me, accusing me of doing something that I didn’t do. The policeman was white and I was white. Does this mean that “all” white policemen are cruel and prejudiced just because one of them mistreated me many years ago? Now, as a Christian, I believe that Christ died for that policeman just as much as he died for me, though his response to that sacrifice evidently was not the same as mine.
Keith Lunders and many other bigoted, prejudiced people like him are simply trying to impose fear on weak-minded, susceptible white people in order to exclude suffering, emigrant people from American society.
Jim Holsinger
Grangeville
Just turn the other cheek, Vaughn
Vaughn Jasper — just stop it, right now!
So, you got criticized. Well, professional writers get that, too. Do you think they want to just quit — tuck tail and hide the funny side of their talent because for once it wasn’t funny? No. They accept — and learn from the criticism.
So, why do I compare you to professional writers? Because I think you’re that good. You have the talent, but you run with it without thinking it through. I’m sure your feelings were hurt and in that particular instance you did deserve it.
If you don’t agree, read the offending parts of your letter again and apologize if you must, but with humor. However do not “stop trying to be funny,” because it seems like a penalty imposed on your fans by your bruised ego.
Judith R. Lougee
Source: https://lmtribune.com/opinion/letters/aug-letters-to-the-editor-part/article_63554c6d-9fa1-5cbc-af30-da27a0d86243.html
0 notes
aruneshgoyal · 4 years
Text
I
Tumblr media
India N Indian Topics Exclusively
  WE start with the goods and evils of the education system followed in India before moving on to an interesting debate specifically in eight parts and finally the rather controversial domain of inter-caste love marriages!
Indian education system good or bad 
The education system in India suffers from some serious lacunae. These include preference for good marks/grades over being knowledgeable, lack of encouragement for thinking out of the box (asking questions in the class is considered rude and seldom encouraged; almost non-existent practice of extra reading; education restricted to prescribed textbook and help/guide books, and that too limited to 24 hrs. before the examination day!), rigid and outdated syllabi/curriculum, heavily underpaid professors/teachers (bright minds stay away from this career; professors don’t show much zeal for teaching, they just “go through” the motions),  only a few colleges with good quality of education where you have to be in the top elite to gain admission besides there being a lack of passion for education in the real sense (most students go for engineering/medicine on the advice of “elders”!).
Now, for some serious facts and stats regarding Indian education system vindicating the aforementioned lacunae (note that these stats are based on those provided by the government of India itself freely on the web): In India, just 11% of the children finishing school joins a college whereas in the US, this figure amounts to a whopping 83%. As per the eleventh plan, to increase this enrolment level to 15%, India needs to invest approx. Rs. 22.5 billion but it has allotted only a fourth of the total needed. 
According to a study by the National Assessment and Accreditation Council, 90% of the colleges and 70% of the universities that the council graded were of middling or poor quality. The standard of school education has stagnated too.  In rural India, there is no teaching activity on about 50% of the working days in the primary schools. 
There is an endemic shortage of teachers with even the IITs reporting a 20% to 30% shortfall in faculty. Indian universities, if one goes by average, revise their curricula only once in 5 to 10 years but by then they get defeated in both letter and spirit. 
Corruption is the by-word in higher education having become rampant and institutionalized due to over-regulation by the government and multiplicity of education agencies leading to what else but stagnation in this very vital sector of education. 
The lack of good institutions has seen cutoff percentages for entry into good colleges soar to almost impossible levels (at Delhi’s SRCC college, this percentage was as high as 98.75). There is an undue pressure to do well in the secondary board exams because of which the suicidal tendency has grown alarmingly. 
Owing to poor quality of education at home, Indian students now spend no less than $7000 million to go abroad and study in foreign universities. Still the government is adamant over its peculiar stance of not permitting foreign universities to set up shop in India.
We have almost done with the bad points of the Indian education system. And, to end on a bright note, almost 50% of the country’s population is below 25 years. Almost 10% of them or 120 million are between the ages of 18 and 23. Let them have both knowledge and skills; they could surely drive India’s competitive and entrepreneurial spirit and transform it into a major global power. Isn’t it a good ending to the bad side of Indian education scenario? 
________________________________________________________________
Now, we move on to the 8-part OPEN Debate!
Saturday 4th February, Two Thousand Seventeen, 01:19 hrs IST Cordial Invite to COME, One n ALL:   An OPEN Debate [1]
Openly Looting the Public 24x365
  - In the name of religion 
- In the name of providing customer care n ostensible help 
- In the name of modernity n debatable consumerism - In the name of All leftover jargon n paraphernalia
In the current era, one witnesses a plethora of crimes of all types but none comes close to the most sinful act of looting the most gullible general public at large openly in front of their own eyes by whatever means or names you put it – religion, customer care, consumerism and all that is left over in this rather long but undesirable list of swindling and cheating!
What to speak of the general society, even in temples, we see people worshipping and performing rituals just for the sake of trifling and material things. Nobody is prepared to make efforts for the real fruit of devotion, the peace that passes all understanding, self-realization, an answer to the eternal query of human life – “WHO am I?”.  And, in most of the shrines, the so-called ‘pujaris’ (in essence, they are only pandas like in the Kalkaji temple, to mention one) take full advantage of this lackadaisical attitude fomenting it further for their own selfish ends. They encourage and exhort the gullible devotees to donate more and more in order that their narrow worldly wishes are fulfilled. But, what is to be understood is the fact that you go to a temple only to meet GOD, your Best Friend and ally; Rest is all superficial. But neither do you know this fact nor do the so-called learned pundits tell you or make you know that. All that is left is the hallo bulla of rituals, noise, pushing and jostling with no or little ‘peace of mind’! The so-called customer care department in most of the big private sector names (such as Vodafone, for instance) and MNCs is there to ostensibly provide help to harried customers and clients of the company in question but what is to be understood is the fact that the customer care ‘agent’ has only got a single minded objective of helping his company first by way of increasing its revenues in whatever way possible, by hook or by crook! 
   I don’t have to elaborate much on how people are getting looted in the name of modernity or modern consumerism, if I may put it that way. The simplest example is the 1+1 free schemes floated in the market to dupe the gullible customers of their hard earned valuable money. Similar in nature are most of the other ‘free’ consumer schemes! I may also add here the part played by aggressive advertising of the modern day products most of which is misleading at hindsight. But the pumped up euphoria created weighs heavily on the nerves and minds of the unsuspecting people who are thereby taken for a ride by the modern consumer companies.
There are many more things left in this long but rather indescribable list of rather ‘subtle’ swindling and cheating which you may count for yourself! 
________________________________________________________________
Saturday 11th February, Two Thousand Seventeen, 19:27 hrs IST Cordial Invite to COME, One n ALL:   An OPEN Debate [2]
Parking Nuisance N Road Mayhem 
- Traffic on the increase 
- Lack of adequate public transport 
- Lack of coordination between civic authorities, that be, such as MCD, NDMC etc. etc. 
- No ‘parking sense’ and lack of sensitivity towards others (case example: an ambulance carrying an emergency heart patient ‘obstructed’ due to road blockage) 
- No rules / regulations at all, literally N virtually, being adhered to; rules / regulations if, at all, exist only on paper!! 
- Utterly disdainful selfishness on the part of each one of the commuters, or, for that matter, on the part of each one of us forming the social fabric, the so-called members of the modern ‘civil’ society!
Nobody can deny the fact that traffic on our roads is ever increasing day by day what with the Indian population growing at a phenomenal rate and touching a whopping 1.25 billion as per the year 2013 data. Be it a senior pro, a young executive or a middle aged person, each one wants to ride his own bandwagon / vehicle. Even more alarming is the fact that each one is in a tremendous hurry to get to his respective destination. If somebody has to reach half an hour early, he would start half an hour late rather than an hour early. This is the story of each one of us, whether you like it or not! 
Added to it is the factor of inadequate public transport. YES, the Metro has “arrived” but a little too ‘late’ and achieved a little too ‘less’ than desirable. One point to understand is that the metro cannot solve all the transport problems on its own. It needs adequate support from other sectors such as state run buses, autos, taxis and other vehicles, wherever and in whatever way they can prove helpful. In fact, a carefully crafted ‘public transport network’ is the need of the hour. One thing is clear. The public won’t mind paying and shelling out a reasonable amount to travel in convenience and in good time too. It is now up to the civic authorities, that be, to rise to the occasion and deliver!! 
On the contrary, what one finds is the complete lack of coordination between the various civic authority channels N agencies such as the MCD, the NDMC, and so on and so forth. What one does is undone by the other and what is done by the latter is undone by the former. The classic case is the digging up of roads by the various agencies such as the Delhi Jal Board, i.e. DJB (for laying the sewer lines, for instance), the Gas Authority of India Ltd., i.e. GAIL (for supplying PNG directly to homes, for instance), etc. etc. They simply keep coming at you, one after the other, and the roads virtually remain dug up for most of the time. 
About our ‘parking or road sense’, the less said, the better! It is just as if we want the complete road for ourselves leaving the others to fend by themselves. The only sensitivity we have is for ourselves only. If we want to park our car / vehicle, we would do it simply without a thought for others. If we want to put up a ‘temporary tent (shamiana, as it is referred to as in Hindi)’, we would do it right in the centre of the road, as if the whole and complete road belongs to us only with the others being mere ordinary onlookers or spectators, who have come to watch our show of ego N strength. This inevitably leads to traffic snarls / jams! But, who cares for an emergency hospital case losing vital N crucial time, in the process!
In modern day India, the law of the jungle rules the roost!!  Even in a jungle, the animals follow some simple rules by way of their natural instinct!! But, in our modern society, rules N regulations exist only for namesake! They exist only on paper! And, I really don’t blame the general public for this. Who would like to follow rules N regulations when an honest person is unfairly penalized for no reason even as trespassers go scot free for every reason? It’s for our senior leaders to show and pave the way for others to follow!!! 
    Last, but not the least, we must understand the simple fact that as good users of the roads, we must be totally unselfish in our approach. WE must understand the simple fact that to be actual humans, we must discard the animalism in us and be completely humanitarian in our approach to use of the roads. Then, and only then, we can build a truly good ‘civil’ society for the common good of each one of us!!!! 
________________________________________________________________
Cordial Invite to COME, One n ALL:   An OPEN Debate [3] 
(Lack of Proper) Places / Spaces for Social Events N Public Toilets 
The Civic authorities, that be, charge the populace by way of various taxes like income tax, property tax, road tax, sales tax, and so on and so forth. As such, they are obliged to provide proper N adequate public places for social events lack of which leads to people putting up ‘shamianas’ N temporary tents on the road itself, which, in turn, leads to traffic snarls / jams and causes inconvenience, in general, to general commuters. In case of an emergency like a hospital case, this could even prove fatal N catastrophic! 
The Civic authorities would do well to remedy the situation and work for the welfare of the general public at large rather than serving their own narrow ends N indulging in petty political games N gimmicks!!
  I may add here that providing N maintaining neat N clean public toilets (as also garbage waste boxes) is another bounden duty of the Authorities and that too free of cost, preferably. This point is to be understood even more significantly in the wake of our Honorable PM, Mr. Narendra Modi’s hugely pumped up bandwagon N clarion call of “Swachh Bharat” Andolan N ‘Abhiyan’, as Mr. Modi likes to put it!!!    
________________________________________________________________
Sunday 12th February, Two Thousand Seventeen, 09:54 hrs IST Cordial Invite to COME, One n ALL:   An OPEN Debate [4] 
Corruption N its Ramifications
  I really don’t need to introduce you to “corruption”! It’s rampant and ever on the increase in India!! 
While everybody talks of ‘Ram-Rajya’, nobody has the guts to make any sort of painstaking efforts in the right direction, that is, self effacement N thinking about the welfare of the “W-H-O-L-E” rather than just the “p=a=r=t=s”! 
Whichever and whatever political party comes to power, the fate of the general populace never changes and remains, more or less, the same. Of course, to gain power, our cunning politicians, Mr. Arvind Kejriwal, the Delhi CM and the main / front face of AAP (Aam Aadmi Party), being no exception , make big promises only to back out later on, as per their own suitability N convenience. And, even if the government allocates some funds for emancipation of the poor and the downtrodden, they seldom reach the latter and remain virtual paper concepts N pipedreams to be consigned to the bin at the earliest available N convenient opportunity. 
Our bureaucracy, and for that matter, the w-h-o-le system, from the top rungs down to the lowermost channels, has become totally inept, defunct, and is affected with serious plague and if I may put it that way, with Dengue N Malaria as well to boot. 
You need a job! First of all, none is available thanks to our elephantine growth of population. Second, if there is any, you need some sort of a link to gain it. It could be a bribe; it could be a call from the higher ups; or, even brute force! So, what do you do? Either, act against your conscience and get the job, by hook or by crook, or sit quietly at home, feeling thoroughly frustrated inside out!! 
Gandhiji has been reported to advise the dismantling of the Indian National Congress after we had gained independence from the autocratic N anarchical British Rulers but there were suave leaders like Pt. Jawaharlal Nehru, who had their own axe to grind and didn’t heed to Gandhi’s noble N wise suggestion. The result is there to see for all of us. The Congress has ruled India for almost sixty years but the lot of the common man has not improved even six per cent! 
Martyrs like Saheed Bhagat Singh, who were actually responsible for instilling fear into the British regimen leading to our consequent independence, had sounded a word of caution to their fellow brethren N Countrymen – “Don’t get complacent and become a slave of your own leaders! They will be even more dangerous N notorious than the Englishmen!” 
  Just, reflect for a minute and peep unto your selves!! How prophetic N true these words / gems N pearls of wisdom have proved to be!!  
________________________________________________________________
Sunday 12th February, Two Thousand Seventeen, 10:08 hrs IST Cordial Invite to COME, One n ALL:   An OPEN Debate [5]
  OUR Unreserved ‘Reservation Policy’ 
Continuing from where I left my last piece, a word about our ‘reservation policy’.   At the time of our independence (1947), it was rightly felt by the Dr. B.R. Ambedkar led Constituent Committee that some sections of our society were in an inferior position (although Gandhiji called them ‘Harijans’) relative to others and needed to be compensated for it. As such, they allowed reservations to be made for such unjustly treated sections for 10 years. But, what is appalling is the fact that they have continued till date for more than 60 years now and even other communities are demanding N vying for reservations.
  This is primarily due to the fact that our leaders, for their own vested interests and to eke out vote banks for themselves, have allowed this practice to continue and even grow by leaps And bounds! 
I, for one, would like to phase out reservations slowly but steadily. Let me illustrate, by a live example, my viewpoint.   Suppose, somebody has made it to the IAS or the Indian Civil Services, for that matter, by way of reservations! Now, he is an (IAS) officer in his own right, enjoying all the privileges that go along with this tag N plum post. He, along with his family, has slowly but surely moved up to the upper rungs of society and he is now no longer discriminated against. So, how can you continue to provide reservations for him in his service or for his children, for that matter, who should now be allowed to compete with others solely on merit N nothing else!
________________________________________________________________
Monday 20th February, Two Thousand Seventeen, 11:08 hrs IST Cordial Invite to COME, One n ALL:   An OPEN Debate [6] 
  DEFILING the Very Places WE Worship
Yesterday, I was passing by a nearby SHIV temple N PEEPAL tree and I could make out some devotees offering their prayers and worship at the PEEPAL tree. It was all going very well when suddenly I happened to see a pile of garbage N rubbish near the very place of worship, literally at the feet of THE TREE to my utter disbelief, shock N amazement!!! 
I just couldn’t understand and was at a total loss at this sort OR mode of worship!
  First of all, can IT really be called WORSHIP or worthy of being designated as ‘True’ OR “Real” WORSHIP at all?? In the second pace, if we can DEFILE God, ‘Defiling’ ourselves becomes and is even easier! Finally, what sort of legacy OR message are we conveying to our progeny or leaving for the future OR coming generations???   
________________________________________________________________
Monday 20th February, Two Thousand Seventeen, 11:46 hrs IST Cordial Invite to COME, One n ALL:   An OPEN Debate [7] 
LOOKING WITHIN rather than WITHOUT
Continuing from where I left my last piece, a word about Introspecting N Looking IN than OUT! 
  It’s a commonplace habit to find fault with others even when the entire mistake is ours!! As SHRI KABIR DAS JI put it so befittingly – “I went from street to street, place to place, to find evil, but couldn’t find any; when I introspected within, I found the real culprit!!”
        This indeed is the real Truth! WE search for mistakes all around us; but, we forget to search within ourselves; the day we start looking within, our search will surely be over N out!!! 
In the same vein, we look for GOD all around us except ourselves. WE look for without rather than WITHIN. The day we start searching for HIM within, WE are sure to ‘Find’ GOD..!  
________________________________________________________________
Friday 24th February, Two Thousand Seventeen, 12:12 hrs IST Cordial Invite to COME, One n ALL:   An OPEN Debate [8]
  Public Dealing APATHY n Lackadaisical ATTITUDE
There is no gainsaying the fact that in India, public dealing is largely apathetic, lackadaisical and devoid of any human values whatsoever! It is just ‘going thru the motions’ with no real intent of helping the public at large, who on their part, also try to gain, at times, undue advantage of any vantage feelings shown to them.
But, largely, it’s our bankrupt bureaucracy and official machinery at fault. They almost behave as if they are not carrying on with their “bounden duty” but doing a ‘huge favor’ to the general public. May be, the tradition has carried on from the British times. But, it’s now time to change it for the better!
It must be made accountable for its actions with some penalty imposed on the erring official along with speedy justice being meted out to the person relating to whom the action was carried out. Else, this buck will run amok eating everything n everyone with such instances beginning to find their way even into the private sector, albeit, not to that extent, as of now. 
But, if unchecked, this menace will outgrow each n every one!!
________________________________________________________________
Now, we move on to the final discussion in this exclusive Indian section, viz. Inter-Caste Love Marriages. ________________________________________
Inter Caste Love Marriages -   
Problems & Solutions
  Prologue Since times immemorial, people have fallen in love irrespective of caste, religion or territorial boundaries. They might have had to pay a heavy price for this but in the process they have made love immortal. Love is such a sweet and nice feeling, truly nectarine and divine! 
More recently, the inter caste love marriage trend in India has been on the increase.  Widespread education along with the “proliferation of professions through the castes” has rendered the Caste System less relevant than before. And, this increasing trend is likely to continue in spite of the multifarious problems involved. Such problems include custom & belief systems, culture & language differences, contrasting living styles, matters of faith, even dietary contrasts. Not to forget the disapproval of parents and elders from both sides. 
Mutual Adjustment and Sacrifice However, if the couple involved truly love each other, they can easily tackle all these problems. Each of the concerned partners must learn to adjust for the sake of the other. Then, all these differences of cultures, traditions, living styles and diet etc., which look big on paper, actually become negligible. And, this is what successful marriage is all about – mutual adjustment and sacrifice for the sake of the other partner. 
They must put forward their case convincingly and strongly, maturely bringing forth the good points of their partner. Marriage is, after all, not only a mutual amalgamation of two persons, but a marriage of the two concerned families as well. The couple could do with the full support of their families for a pleasant and fructifying matrimonial alliance. 
External Help   In case they need some external help, they can call upon a versatile inter caste love marriage specialist Baba. Or, an expert inter caste love marriage specialist astrologer. To help them in their cause of inter caste love marriage problem solution. Of course, they must first make sure that such a Baba or astrologer is really genuine. He could well be trying to make some easy money at their cost! There are many a inter caste love marriage specialist Baba and inter caste love marriage specialist astrologer willing to help. By various means, they attempt for an inter caste love marriage problem solution. An inter caste love marriage specialist Baba claims to help by positive “vashikaran” mantras, 'yagnas', hymns and other rituals. But, we have yet to verify these scientifically. 
Astrology can help by way of numerology,’ vastu shastra’ and the like. Such methods are much more scientific as compared to those advocated by an inter caste love marriage specialist Baba. However, only a few inter caste love marriage specialist astrologers, who are a master of their art and craft, can really help. But then, they may charge extravagantly for their virtuoso advice and services. You have to find out and convince yourself first than anybody else. 
Dating With the large-scale extensive globalisation and modern-day computerization, not to forget the ubiquitous mobile cell phones, the world has shrunk. It has brought in its wake people belonging to diverse avenues, fields and regions together. Under such circumstances, it’s not very surprising that in India, dating has become very common. Especially of late, even among inter castes. 
And, when people belonging to different castes date and spend time together, they gradually tend to come closer. They might even wish to settle down in life as real partners as well. It’s only natural then that their parents or elders disapprove of them. This is particularly true in view of the fact that dating in India is still relatively a new phenomenon and concept. 
  It’s really here that the inter caste love marriage specialist Baba and the inter caste love marriage specialist astrologer come into play. They can foresee and foretell if you will make a good match or pair. And if so, they can play a vital part and role in bringing around your families to your viewpoint. 
Arranged Marriages Looking at it another way, love marriages are sometimes themselves out of favour in India as compared to arranged marriages. In the latter case, the duo has all the backing and support of all the family members from both sides. In stark contrast is the former case, wherein the couple may have to fend for themselves on their own. On top of it, inter caste love marriages offer just the icing on the cake. Making your family members, parents and elders scream wildly at you.
  The only way out for you is not to yell back; rather, convince them strongly with reasonable arguments. You must meet each of their viewpoints with proper counter arguments. The elders are generally concerned that love marriages usually end in divorce. You can counter this with suitable and proper examples from practical life. Similarly, you can counter and address their other concerns. Like your partner’s weak financial position, his/her cultural beliefs or non-vegetarian diet etc. 
Progeny There is at least one solid scientific reason that goes in favour of inter caste love marriages. Or, for that matter, any inter caste marriage, in general! It is the genetic refinement and improvement in hereditary features of the progeny or the coming generation. As inter caste marriages become more widespread, the very menace of Caste System in India will meet its doom.  It will, by itself, just evaporate into thin air.
Epilogue So, are you planning an inter caste love marriage? With or without an able inter caste love marriage specialist Baba or inter caste love marriage specialist astrologer to guide you?  Remember, both of them can guide by way of their expert k/w in inter caste love marriage solution! 
  You need not worry at all if you are first yourself convinced about your decision. In fact, you can then try to convince your families that you will make a happy pair. And, that your matrimonial alliance will be for the good of one and all. After this, there can be no stopping you. In fact, you can just go ahead and zoom right away into matrimony confidently and tenaciously. 
And, you’ll have the added satisfaction of having done India a world of good with your loving action!! 
________________________________________ ***************************** 
0 notes
newsmanmdgn · 3 years
Text
Fed Selling a Global Minimum Tax for the Biden Infrastructure Plan
I'm giving away a free 30-day subscription to the Washington Post (value $10). Enter to win here.
1
The Fed's Janet Yellen is helping sell President Joe Biden's infrastructure plan by getting the G20 to impose a global minimum corporate tax rate.
Together we can use a global minimum tax to make sure the global economy thrives based on a more level playing field in the taxation of multinational corporations, and spurs innovation, growth, and prosperity.
Janet Yellen in a prepared statement
Read the Axios story here.
The idea here is to disincentivize domestic companies from moving off shore to enjoy lower tax rates. For example, if the US imposes a 7 percent increase, from 21 percent to 28 percent, and China, say, only has a 14 percent corporate tax rate, then US-based companies have an incentive to move their operations to China.
If, however, the minimum tax rate is, say, 31 percent, there is no “tax reason” to move to China.
Of course, it's not this easy. It never is. There are many factors that would make moving and setting up shop in another country more appealing. Things like wages, rents, regulations, etc.
But it looks good on paper and isn't a bad idea, generally speaking. It does remove one factor from consideration. And if it keeps several mega corporations located in the US, the country will reap the tax revenue from it.
Thus, this could be a way to raise more revenue to pay for the infrastructure legislation the Biden administration is seeking.
This is far more than the GOP did with Trump's tax cut for the wealthy. They didn't even try to pay for it.
Amazon's Jeff Bezos is all in.
At the end of the day, I think the vast majority of countries won't budge much, if at all.
2
Trump is the Undisputed King of Grift
There is no disputing this: Ex-President Trump is a bigly grifter. Here's further proof.
In the run up to the 2020 election, Team Trump sent out hundreds of emails and texts, sending potential contributors to his campaign website (still live but I won't give it oxygen).
There, gullible contributors (aka, “dummies”) were encouraged to make a donation. In fact, they were default signed up for recurring weekly contributions!
So if you contributed $100, your credit card or bank account got squeezed for $100 EVERY WEEK until you or the Trump campaign stopped it. That's crazy.
Of course, they didn't stop it when the election was over. They kept debiting accounts all the way up until December 14, when the electoral college votes were counted. Between November 3, 2020 and December 14, 2020, the Trump campaign was heavily invested in the “Stop the Steal” BIG LIE. And you guessed it – if you had contributed and didn't see that little checkbox about the recurring weekly contributions, you were heavily invested in Stop the Steal, too! LOL
The NY Times broke the story here. Trump has had to give back millions of dollars to duped donators.
Here's an excerpt from the Times:
Stacy Blatt was in hospice care last September listening to Rush Limbaugh’s dire warnings about how badly Donald J. Trump’s campaign needed money when he went online and chipped in everything he could: $500.
It was a big sum for a 63-year-old battling cancer and living in Kansas City on less than $1,000 per month. But that single contribution — federal records show it was his first ever — quickly multiplied. Another $500 was withdrawn the next day, then $500 the next week and every week through mid-October, without his knowledge — until Mr. Blatt’s bank account had been depleted and frozen. When his utility and rent payments bounced, he called his brother, Russell, for help.
What the Blatts soon discovered was $3,000 in withdrawals by the Trump campaign in less than 30 days. They called their bank and said they thought they were victims of fraud.
“It felt,” Russell said, “like it was a scam.”
But what the Blatts believed was duplicity was actually an intentional scheme to boost revenues by the Trump campaign and the for-profit company that processed its online donations, WinRed. Facing a cash crunch and getting badly outspent by the Democrats, the campaign had begun last September to set up recurring donations by default for online donors, for every week until the election.
Contributors had to wade through a fine-print disclaimer and manually uncheck a box to opt out.
As the election neared, the Trump team made that disclaimer increasingly opaque, an investigation by The New York Times showed. It introduced a second prechecked box, known internally as a “money bomb,” that doubled a person’s contribution. Eventually its solicitations featured lines of text in bold and capital letters that overwhelmed the opt-out language.
What a bunch of thieves. They should be ashamed, but they have no shame. And just so ya know, they're still doing it. Again, I won't give you think link but here's a pretty picture:
3
Toast is for breakfast, lunch, and dinner
In prison movies, they always talk about “three squares and a warm bed.”
I hope that's where former Minneapolis Police officer Derek Chauvin winds up. It's not looking good for him. Many of his former colleagues, including his Chief of Police, have testified against him (brought as witnesses by the prosecution).
And they have done him no favors.
It is apparent (and always has been to “normal” people) that Chauvin used excessive force when kneeling on George Floyd's neck for nine minutes and twenty-nine seconds, causing him to die.
But this trial is not over. In fact, it's not even half over. The defense hasn't yet made their case, with their witnesses. You can bet it's going to get ugly. George Floyd will be painted a criminal, high on drugs, and with a pre-existing heart condition.
“How could the fine officer Chauvin have known Floyd had a weak heart and was high on Fentanyl?”
That's the case they'll make. And they'll point to “the throng of angry bystanders.”
Note how they don't call them witnesses. Here's that “throng,” in case you were wondering.
The “angry mob” present at the arrest and murder of George Floyd
4
Arkansas lawmakers override GOP governor's veto of bill restricting transgender health care.
I wonder how much of this was political theatrics?
A timeline:
Arkansas legislature put together a bill that would restrict health care to transgender people.
Arkansas Governor Asa Hutchinson vetoed the bill.
Arkansas legislature overrode his veto, making it law.
The Governor said of the bill: “(It is a) “vast government overreach” and “a product of the cultural war in America.” 
Now the ACLU is involved. You can contribute here. They will win.
Full story here.
5
New, made-for-TV movie “Meet the Grifters” airs all over the internet today, tomorrow, and for all of eternity
The Matt Gaetz saga turned another couple pages in the past few days. Here are the highlights:
Gaetz has been under investigation for sex trafficking.
Gaetz claims his family was extorted for $25 million dollars “to make the case go away.”
Guy Gaetz claimed extorted his family (Bob Kent) came forward to say, “Yeah, I asked the Gaetz family for $25 million. But it was for an American hostage I've been trying to get freed for years. I never said anything about the case, except that the family could use some good will right about now and helping me find an American held hostage in a foreign country would certainly do that.” (I paraphrased.)
Gaetz' buddy, Joel Greenberg, former Seminole County tax collector, who's under indictment and in jail awaiting trial, is reportedly “turning on” Gaetze, dishing the dirt in order to get a reduced sentence.
Gaetz asked the Trump administration last year for a “blanket pardon.” He didn't get it.
Gaetz is fucked.
More Matt Gaetz hilarity here.
6
Whew! We're almost done. This has been a Morning Sixpack-and-a-half.
Mitch McConnell says companies should stay out of politics — unless they’re donating money.
Is there anything else to say? Nope. Except that old Turtle Neck needs to STFU. When will Kentucky fire that old geezer?
Quick Poll:
What state has the worst pair of senators? I'll start: Kentucky.
***
The End.
The article was originally published here! Fed Selling a Global Minimum Tax for the Biden Infrastructure Plan
0 notes