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#they project themselves into the character
dollypopup · 17 hours
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I think it's interesting to look at the 'Mr. Bridgerton' scene as a backdrop for the eventual mirror scene. Firstly, in the fact that I think we've kind of misinterpreted it.
So many people are of the mind that scene's purpose to 'drag' Colin, but really, that scene has 3 primary functions. The first is to inform Colin that Penelope is aware of what he said of her, thus opening the door to clearing the air between them and providing an avenue for which Colin can apologize. The second is to establish the ground that they are currently on: Penelope has given up on the dream of Colin Bridgerton, in particular the perfect prince that can do no wrong, and has made it clear to him. It also creates distance between them that they will bridge.
But the third, and to me the most wrapped up in the mirror and the inner workings of their relationship is that it reveals how Penelope feels about *herself*. It's not necessarily an echo of what the ton considers her as, after all, we have a lot of evidence indicating that, for all intents and purpose, people aren't *unkind* about her, but rather that they ignore her. Audience members recognize this as Penelope's own shyness being the cause, she is often sitting off on the sidelines or not really talking to much of anyone, in the books she's referred to as the 'one who doesn't speak', and her LW business takes her away from being a character in the action of the ton to a bystander, kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts that perpetuates itself. Pen felt unseen so she became LW to have some power, but then LW herself must remain unseen and Penelope continues to be by design of her own making.
No, I think what it really reveals is that Penelope has incredibly low personal self esteem. We as a fandom has lauded that scene as her dragging Colin, saying that he's cruel and calling him Mr. Bridgerton is absolutely meant to create distance between them, but I don't think she's dragging him.
Because the person she is *actually* dragging here. . .is herself. And it is a general theme in her life. In Whistledown. Aloud. Even with Marina, when she complimented her, she assumes that she's lying. When Edwina says she's wearing a pretty dress, Penelope puts herself down and doesn't believe her, even when the compliment is genuine. In truth, Portia is not seen as being particularly unkind to Penelope. At least, speaking as someone who's mum was *awful* about my size and weight and outfits, Portia is. . .overall rather mild. She's not KIND and loving, not by a long shot, but she's also not targeting Penelope only. She's plenty mean and critical to Prudence, too, even to the point where she foists her off to her own cousin as a pawn piece. Penelope has low self esteem because of a lot of reasons, she's bullied by Cressida (I think a lot of girls are, she was pretty mean even to Daphne in S1) and her family isn't very tender to her, and she's not being pursued at every turn, but part of it is also her own perpetuation.
Listen to what she says "Of course you would never court me" "I embarrass you" "I am the laughingstock of the the ton". She sees *herself* as an embarrassment. She puts *herself* down. Arguably, more so than the ton does. She's meaner to herself than anyone else is, aside from Cressida. And honestly? Looking at Colin's face there. . .he is HURT that she considers herself this way. That she's projecting that onto him. Yes, he's hurt that he hurt her, of course he is, he never wants to hurt her. And yes, he's ashamed that he said he wouldn't court her the way he did and that in doing so, he validated her fears that she is unloved and unwanted, but also because. . .she already feels that way about herself. She's felt that way for years. And it's painful to care about someone, to see them as wonderful, and realize. . .they don't feel the same about themselves at all. I don't think Colin is out here feeling so wounded over the fact that she called him cruel and won't refer to him by first name anymore, but that he's most hurt by what she says about herself.
Because he *doesn't* see her the way she accuses. She says she never expected him of all people to be so cruel, but he feels the same way. He never expected her to be so cruel to *herself*. He wants to go somewhere private, not because she is an embarrassment, but because he wants to have a private conversation with her. Maybe assure her. Maybe explain himself. Maybe hash it out. But god Luke Newton's acting. . .he is *aching* for her. And it feels like he's going to do those lessons not in atonement for what he said (thank god) but to genuinely help his friend who thinks badly of herself. To lift her up. It's not about him at all, not about earning forgiveness, but about elevating Penelope. And that's. . .fuck, I just find that's just so heart stoppingly beautiful.
You can see, in that scene, how much he cares about her. How deeply and genuinely he adores her as a person. And just how painful it is for him to know he has validated, whether on purpose or otherwise, how poorly she feels about herself. How low her self-confidence really is. She is giving him a glimpse into the cracks of her heart, and when he sees them, he wants to reach out with both hands and make it feel better. Make her feel better.
After she says 'even when I change my entire wardrobe', he looks so fucking crushed. So 'don't say that'. So 'you really believe that?'. So 'God, I hate that you think that way'.
Because regardless of it all, he does love her. It's not romantic yet. It's not sexual yet. But he genuinely, truly, from the bottom of his heart, thinks she's wonderful. That was evident even in the 'purpose' scene. Every time Penelope opens up and reveals a facet of herself, he likes it. He likes her barbs and her dreams, he likes talking to her. He likes her. And he feels awful that he hurt her. And he feels awful that she's hurting herself. He loves her. He wants her to love herself.
And that's where the mirror scene comes in. Because the mirror scene isn't about sex, not really. Not entirely, at least. The mirror scene is about *intimacy*. The mirror scene is about being seen. Not just her seeing him, or him seeing her, but for Penelope to see *herself*. In a way, through his eyes. Because hers are biased rather negatively toward herself, which is evidenced in the 'Goodnight Mr. Bridgerton' scene, and in so many little moments we've already gotten where she's literally looking down on herself, feeling down. She doesn't necessarily *like* what's in the mirror, but he does. Because he likes *her*. And he wants to show her that he does. Show her that he finds her beautiful and have her recognize that in herself.
The 'Goodnight Mr. Bridgerton' scene is about Penelope revealing how she sees herself. The mirror scene is about Colin showing her how *he* sees her. The Goodnight scene is about Penelope thinking she means nothing to him, that he thinks of her the way she thinks of herself, that this is how everyone thinks of her, and the mirror scene is a direct response to that: No, he doesn't. No, he doesn't think she's embarrassing. No, he doesn't think she's a laughingstock. No, he doesn't think she's unappealing. And he doesn't think she should, either.
And he's going to show her that. Not just tell her, but show her. The mirror scene is so often a focus on Penelope, so much of Polin is in Penelope's focus, but approaching it from Colin's perspective and his motivations is so fulfilling, too. It's a glimpse into them in conversation, and a demonstrate of how Colin loves her. How Colin loves in general, openly and earnestly and altruistically. How he encourages her to be braver and more confident in herself, bolstering her because he just likes her *that much*. How he finds the most fulfillment and satisfaction in caring aloud. The mirror scene is a demonstration of his heart in reflection.
When Luke Newton said the first word that came to mind with the word 'Mirror' was 'Exposed', he doesn't just mean physically. He means emotionally, too.
God this couple is so fucking good.
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Why Bumbleby Matters
Yesterday was the first anniversary of one of the biggest kisses in queer media. Blake Belladonna and Yang Xiao Long, of the cult hit web show RWBY, confessed their love and smooched on March 25, 2023, and I was totally normal about it. I don't have all the manga and figures and a tattoo and half a million words of fanfic; that would be *crazy*, especially compared to socially-acceprable normal fixations like season tickets to sportsball games or thousand-dollar concert tickets. 
A lot of things make RWBY an important show. It's an animated action story that puts its four heroines unambiguously front and center, with arcs that are about *them*, and not as set dressing or motivation for make protagonists. It's increasingly represented sapphic, trans, and nonbinary characters across its nine seasons, and its won awards for taking its silly, cheesy origins and developing a complex story about broken heroes and traumatized villains finding themselves and struggling with love, loss, disability, abuse, and a whole spectrum of human experiences, with the fate of the world hanging in the balance. 
But what's important about Blake and Yang was that they got a real romance that, across nine seasons, they had to fight for. In an era where queer representation is largely still a diversity checkbox for most media (see: Disney crowing about having background characters looking at each other a little gayly while passing on movies like Nimona that actually revolve around queer relationships), or struggle to be more than titillation (Saltburn) and are swatted down by corporate censors (Legend of Korra and She-Ra were years ago, and this year's blockbuster Witch from Mercury was still officially "open to interpretation"), getting an actually romance cooked for nine seasons across ten years... y'know, like you'd expect from a straight slowburn... is huge. 
RWBY's studio was just shut down by Warner Bros, infamous for shelving projects for the tax writeoffs, so who knows if we'll ever get a conclusion to the story. But one year ago, we got a beautiful conclusion to Blake & Yang's love story, one that mattered to queer people around the world. 
cross posted from Patreon
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idocarealot · 17 hours
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Enchanted - Part 1/7
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Pairing: Enzo Vogrincic x Actress!Reader
Synopsis: Bored at an event as a brand ambassador, you lock eyes with a man across the room and your evening takes a turn. Based on this request
Wordcount: 3.1k
Warnings: fluff, tension, minor angst (if you squint), flirting, reader has a backstory, mentions of alcohol, brief use of Y/N
A/N: additional warning: cringy dialogue? This is mostly a prologue for the series. A little bit based on the song Enchanted by Taylor Swift. And as always, just pretend they're speaking Spanish.
Series Masterlist & Masterlist
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As the pulsating beat of the music filled the air, you navigated through the crowded room with practiced ease, a glass of champagne in hand. The sparkling lights and chatter of the guests created a vibrant atmosphere, but deep down, you couldn't shake off a sense of unease. This wasn't where you wanted to be tonight. 
It was another glamorous event, one of many that filled your calendar as an ambassador for a prestigious beauty brand. Normally, you'd have your sister by your side, her infectious laughter and unwavering support serving as a comforting presence in these bustling gatherings. But tonight, she was bedridden with illness, leaving you to navigate the soirée solo.
You couldn't help but notice the familiar patterns that seemed to repeat themselves at every event. New products were unveiled, celebrities graced magazine covers, and champagne flowed freely—all under the guise of celebration.
You engaged in polite small talk with the attendees, effortlessly slipping into the role of the charming socialite. Yet, behind the facade of smiles and laughter, you couldn't shake the feeling of detachment. These people knew you only as the glamorous persona you projected in public—a facade meticulously crafted by years in the spotlight.
Your mind drifted back to the beginnings of your journey in the entertainment industry. It had been a whirlwind journey from your first gig at eleven years old as a child actor to the seasoned professional you had become, fifteen years later. Acting was more than just a career; it was your passion, your raison d'être.
Despite the glitz and glamour that often accompanied your profession, you had managed to steer clear of scandal, maintaining a pristine reputation in an industry known for its pitfalls. Your films had garnered critical acclaim, and your portrayal of diverse characters had earned you a devoted fan base.
Being an ambassador for this beauty brand had added another layer of prestige to your already illustrious career. For nearly five years, you had been the face of their campaigns, gracing magazine covers and social media platforms with your radiant presence. It was a symbiotic relationship—you promoted their products, and they rewarded you handsomely in return.
Yet, beneath the veneer of success, there lurked a sense of disillusionment. The industry often felt hollow, leaving you longing for something more substantial. Tonight was one of those moments, as you navigated the familiar landscape of superficiality and pretense that often defined these events.
Despite the occasional monotony of these events, you had learned to navigate them with grace and composure. You remembered the time you had made a hasty exit from a particularly dull affair, much to the dismay of your publicist. Since then, you had adhered to her strict rule of staying for at least two hours—an obligation that often tested your patience.
As you engaged in small talk with an influencer, your mind wandered, the minutes ticking by at an excruciatingly slow pace. You glanced at your phone, hoping to find that more time had passed than you realized, only to discover that a mere 45 minutes had gone by. One hour and 15 minutes left to endure. You yearned for the comfort of your sister's presence.
Taking a sip of your champagne, you scanned the room, searching for a distraction from the dullness. That's when you felt a pair of eyes boring into you, a subtle change in energy that drew your attention like a magnet. Turning slightly, you found yourself locking eyes with a man across the room, though he quickly averted his eyes. There was something oddly familiar about him, a nagging feeling that tugged at the recesses of your memory.
He was undeniably handsome, his features chiseled and his demeanor exuding an air of quiet confidence. Yet, despite his striking appearance, he appeared just as out of place in this sea of superficiality as you felt. And then it clicked—recognition dawned upon you like a sudden burst of clarity. You knew where you had seen him before.
His eyes met yours once more, and you felt a flush of warmth spread across your cheeks, realizing you had been caught staring. Feeling bold and excited about the prospect of conversing with someone new, you excused yourself from your current conversation and made your way through the crowd towards him.
With each step closer to him, your heart quickened, a mixture of nerves and excitement coursing through you. You couldn't deny the flutter of anticipation as you closed the distance between you, determined to strike up a conversation with this intriguing man.
As you reached him, he looked at you, a subtle shift in his demeanor betraying his surprise at your approach, though he greeted you with a polite smile.
With a friendly grin, you introduced yourself, the words tumbling effortlessly from your lips. "Hi, I'm Y/N."
"Oh, I know. I'm— I'm Enzo," he responded, his words accented with a hint of nervousness, spoken in English with a charming accent.
Your smile widened at his response. "Oh, I know," you replied, switching to Spanish, a language that seemed to bridge the gap between you. "I saw your movie. It was incredible."
A look of relief washed over Enzo's features at the sound of his native language, his eyes lighting up with a spark of surprise and gratitude as he registered your words.
"Wow, thank you. That means a lot coming from you. I'm a big fan of all your work," he expressed, his hand resting on his chest in a gesture of gratitude.
"Thank you," you replied, feeling a surge of warmth at his compliment.
"I didn't know you speak Spanish. I've spoken bad English the whole evening," he quipped.
You chuckled softly, enjoying the easy banter between you. "Yeah, my father is from Mexico, so I grew up with both languages. Although I don't speak it now as often as I would like."
Enzo's presence had a way of putting you at ease, and you found yourself opening up to him more than you had anticipated. Whether it was the shared language or an inexplicable connection, you couldn't deny the magnetic pull drawing you closer to him with each passing moment.
Enzo nodded in agreement, his eyes scanning the room once more as if seeking an escape route from the stifling atmosphere of the party. "So, what's the appropriate time to ditch these kinds of events?" he asked, a hint of uncertainty lacing his words. Lost in the sea of unfamiliar faces and foreign conversations, he seemed to look to you for guidance.
You couldn't help but empathize with his predicament. Navigating through such social gatherings could indeed be daunting, especially for someone new to the scene and grappling with a language barrier. Yet, there was a certain charm in his candid vulnerability, a quality that drew you to him even more.
But rather than dwell on the situation, you decided to lighten the mood with a playful suggestion. "Let's play a game," you proposed, a mischievous glimmer dancing in your eyes.
"A game?" Enzo echoed, his curiosity piqued.
You nodded eagerly. "It's called people-watching. My sister came up with it."
Enzo's brow furrowed in confusion. "Aren't people usually watching you?"
You couldn't contain a chuckle at his puzzled expression. "Exactly! But this way, we can be on the opposite side for once." 
Enzo still looked slightly bemused, but there was a spark of intrigue in his eyes as he awaited your instructions. “Alright. How do I play it?”
"It's simple," you replied, a mischievous glint dancing in your eyes as you scanned the room, searching for a suitable target. "I pick out someone in the room, and then you have to make up a story about them. And vice versa. Something wild and completely absurd. The funnier answer wins."
"And what do I get if I win?"
You turned to face him fully, only to find him already gazing at you with an intensity that sent a subtle shiver down your spine. The sudden acceleration of your heart rate caught you off guard, leaving you momentarily breathless. What was it about this man that had you feeling so off-kilter, so inexplicably drawn to him?
"How about my phone number?" you suggested with a playful tilt of your head, a mischievous smile tugging at the corners of your lips. The words slipped out before you could fully process them, but there was no turning back now.
As the realization of your own flirtatiousness dawned on you, a thrill coursed through you, mingling with the nervous excitement that bubbled in the pit of your stomach. 
Enzo's response was a raised eyebrow, his smirk deepening as he held out his hand in agreement. “Deal.”
You swallowed hard, the weight of the moment settling over you as you met his gaze, feeling a surge of anticipation coursing through your veins. With trembling fingers, you reached out to grasp his hand, the touch sending a shiver of electricity racing up your arm. It was a simple gesture, yet it felt charged with a palpable energy that left you breathless.
Enzo's grip was firm yet oddly comforting, his touch igniting a warmth that spread from your fingertips to your core. As you withdrew your hand, you couldn't help but notice the subtle shift in Enzo's expression, a flicker of something unreadable dancing in his eyes. It was as if he, too, felt the charged atmosphere hanging between you.
You blinked, willing your thoughts to clear as you focused on the task at hand. "How about you pick someone and I go first?" you suggested, eager to divert your attention from the lingering sensation of his touch.
Enzo nodded in agreement, his gaze scanning the room before settling on a figure in a blue suit. "Her," he declared, tipping his chin in the direction of an elegant older lady who stood at the edge of the crowd.
You studied her for a moment, taking in her poised demeanor and the air of sophistication that seemed to radiate from her. With a thoughtful expression, you searched your mental catalog for a suitable name, your brows furrowing slightly in concentration.
"Her name is Mrs. Eleanor Pemberton," you declared with a hint of theatricality, a playful twinkle dancing in your eyes as you invented a persona for the unsuspecting stranger. "She's a retired spy, covert operations specialist turned etiquette coach. Trained in the art of espionage, but now she spends her days teaching the elite how to navigate high society."
Enzo raised an eyebrow, his lips quirking up in amusement at your imaginative tale. "That's … Wow, a retired spy?" he chuckled, clearly entertained by your creativity.
You nodded emphatically, unable to suppress a grin. "Absolutely. Just look at the way she surveys the room, assessing every detail with a trained eye. It's all part of her covert training," you insisted, weaving an elaborate backstory for Mrs. Pemberton on the fly.
Enzo's laughter subsided into a warm smile, though his gaze lingered on you for a moment longer, a subtle warmth in his hazel eyes that made your heart flutter involuntarily. There was something undeniably captivating about the way he looked at you, as if he possessed the ability to unravel the layers of your persona with just a single gaze.
Shaking off the unexpected wave of shyness, you redirected your focus to the task at hand, scanning the room for your chosen subject.
“Your turn, Enzo,” you prompted, nodding towards a man with a full beard who stood behind a group of women. “Him. What’s his story?”
Enzo followed your gaze, his eyes narrowing slightly as he focused on the man you had indicated. His lips curved into a mischievous smile, a glint of amusement dancing in his hazel eyes as he considered his response.
"Him? Oh, that's... let's see," Enzo mused, his tone thoughtful as he leaned in closer, as if sharing a secret. "That's Luis Morales. He was a circus performer once but now he's a chef."
You couldn't help but chuckle at his unexpected choice, raising an eyebrow in mock skepticism. "From circus to food?"
Enzo nodded, his expression deadpan. "Luis has a gift. He's known for incorporating circus tricks into his cooking routines. Rumor has it he once cooked a five-course meal while balancing on a tightrope."
You laughed, amused by Enzo's storytelling. "Sounds like quite the character. I'll have to keep an eye out for him at the next dinner party," you teased, relishing in the lighthearted banter between you.
Engaging in conversation with Enzo felt effortless and light-hearted, as if you had been friends for years rather than meeting him for the first time. There was a natural chemistry between you, a comfortable rhythm that flowed seamlessly from one topic to the next.
"Give me your phone," you requested, holding out your hand expectantly.
Enzo arched an eyebrow, a playful glint dancing in his eyes. "I won?" he inquired, retrieving his phone from his pocket.
"Extra points for your first time playing," you countered with a playful smirk, masking the fact that you had just invented that rule on the spot, solely for his benefit.
He handed you his phone, and you quickly entered your number into his contacts. As you returned it to him, your fingers brushed lightly, leaving a tingling sensation in its wake. Enzo accepted his phone with a smile and he tapped away on the screen.
Meanwhile, your own phone vibrated discreetly in your purse, drawing your attention. Curious, you retrieved your phone and discovered a message from an unknown number. 
You're beautiful, it read, causing a rush of warmth to flood your cheeks at the unexpected compliment. Glancing up, you found Enzo's gaze fixed on you, his smile tender and genuine. 
"Thank you," you murmured softly, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips.
The warmth that flooded your chest upon receiving Enzo's swift reply was unexpected yet undeniably welcome. With his number now stored in your phone, you couldn't help but feel a sense of anticipation for the conversations that lay ahead.
There was something about Enzo's quiet confidence that drew you to him like a magnet. In his presence, you felt a sense of ease and comfort that you hadn't experienced in a long time. It was as if the two of you existed in your own little bubble. The hours slipped away unnoticed as you lost yourselves in each other's company.
As you made your way home, you couldn't help but marvel at the feeling of nervous excitement that bubbled within you when you thought of him. It was rare for you to feel such a strong connection with someone, especially someone you had only just met. 
The memory of the hug he had given you before parting lingered in your mind, filling you with a warmth that matched the flush of your cheeks. Enzo was undeniably charming, with a quick wit and an infectious sense of humor that had you hanging on his every word.
And then there was his undeniable attractiveness, a fact that hadn't escaped your notice from the moment you laid eyes on him. The thought of his hazel eyes and the way his smile seemed to light up his entire face brought a fresh wave of heat to your cheeks, and you couldn't help but smile to yourself at the memory.
By the time you arrived home, you couldn't shake the feeling of gratitude for having met Enzo. He had injected a spark of excitement into an otherwise ordinary evening.
Lying in bed, bathed in the soft glow of your bedside lamp, you found yourself unable to shake thoughts of Enzo from your mind. The events of the evening replayed in your head like a looped film reel, each moment etched into your memory with a clarity that surprised you. 
You should have been trying to get some sleep, especially with an audition looming on the horizon. But here you were, lost in a sea of thoughts, your mind refusing to quiet down.
With a sigh, you reached for your phone, fingers dancing over the screen as you navigated to your chat with Enzo. Only one message stared back at you, a silent reminder of the connection you had forged earlier in the evening.
Should you text him now, or wait until after your audition? The question lingered in your mind, uncertainty tugging at the edges of your thoughts. Perhaps it was too late, and he was already fast asleep, lost in dreams that had nothing to do with you. Or maybe he was lying awake, just like you, his mind consumed by thoughts of the woman he had met at the party.
Shaking your head, you scolded yourself for getting ahead of yourself. There was no way of knowing what Enzo was doing at this very moment. After all, you barely knew the man. 
Yet, even as you entertained the possibility of reaching out to him, a nagging doubt crept into your mind. What if he was already seeing someone? What if the connection you felt was nothing more than a fleeting moment in time, destined to be forgotten amidst the chaos of everyday life?
Curious, you opened Instagram and searched for his name. Enzo's profile popped up, and you immediately saw the "Follow back" button. He was already following you. The realization sent a flutter through your chest, a rush of excitement mingled with uncertainty. 
Chiding yourself for getting so worked up over a simple social media interaction, you reminded yourself to keep your composure. But try as you might, you knew that Enzo had already left an indelible mark on your thoughts.
Scrolling through his feed, you searched for any signs of a girlfriend, a pang of relief washing over you when you found none. Perhaps it was selfish of you to feel relieved, but you couldn't deny the surge of hope that blossomed within you. 
Reflecting on the evening, you couldn't help but wonder if you should have lingered a little longer at the event, savored the conversation with Enzo a while longer. But dwelling on what could have been served no purpose now. All you could do was hope that this was just the beginning, that fate would conspire to bring you together again soon.
Turning your phone off, you set it aside and settled back against the pillows, the memory of Enzo's smile lingering in your mind. Until the next time you crossed paths, you were certain that he would remain a constant presence in your thoughts, a gentle reminder of the unexpected connection you shared.
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A/N: Part 2 will be posted in two days. Let me know what you think!
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acapelladitty · 3 days
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I truly don't understand where this attitude that I'm somehow this massive bitch who's ungrateful for the limitless popularity and success that I "get" is stemming from? Do people think I just dropped outta the fucking sky and was instantly handed the meagre accomplishments that I've actually worked my hole off to earn and develop?
In terms of success? I have two fics that have over 1k notes. After SEVEN consistent years of writing and posting fanfic on this site, those remain my most decorated achievements. And even they only got that because they were written for a character I loved at the height of their popularity.
The way some of you talk to me, you would think I was King Shit of Fuck Mountain resting on my infinite pile of inclusions on fic rec lists and fanart gifts and comments and adorations. Maybe it's the confidence I fight to show but I shouldn't be punished for being one of those people who refuses to undermine themselves to score pity points.
And in terms of popularity? Fuck me for making actual friends I suppose? God forbid I form relationships with people based on shared interests and compatible vibes. Just because some of you are so miserable that you suck the colour and life outta those around you like that one clown from the Powerpuff Girls? Try being kinder.
Some of y'all are so bitter towards me for something I have no control over and it's a mixture of sad and truly weird. I cannot comprehend why I'm the enemy when the enemy should be your fucking grasp on reality and projecting onto other people.
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Marauders With Palestine Project FAQ
Can volunteers open themselves up to more prompts if availability changes/can people change the number of prompts they’ve marked themselves available for at a later time?
Absolutely! It will all depend on how many prompts we get, though.
Will there be a social way to contact other participants in the project?
Yes, they’ll all be added to a discord server shortly.
Where can people send proof of donation?
We’ll post the link to a form where the contributors will be able to send proof of donation as well as their prompt(s).
What is the deadline for art/fics/edits?
They may be posted all throughout June, so the hard deadline is June 30, 2024.
Do I have to post the art/fic/edits on my account when completed? (particularly for nsfw)
Preferably, yes. NSFW art can also be posted to ao3.
Will we be able to contact the person that submitted the prompt we're given, if we have any questions?
Yes, that will be possible. (Applies to art, fics, and edits)
Is it ok if participants don’t use discord/are only available for contact via email?
That’s perfectly fine, we can contact the participants via email, tumblr, or twitter, though discord is preferred.
How long will prompts be?
No longer than 100 words.
Are there any word count expectations for fics?
None at all, but we encourage writers to make their fics longer than 1.5k words.
Should the fics be tagged any specific way on ao3 to make it clear they’re for the project?
The fics need to be tagged with MWPProject 2024 Fandom Initiative, and they’ll also be added to a collection. 
Will prompts be filtered/checked for inappropriate/hateful content before they are given out?
Yes, any and all prompts will be checked and approved by the mods.
Can volunteers reject a prompt assigned to them if they are not comfortable with it?
Yes, the volunteers can contact the mods if they wish to change their prompts. 
How long do volunteers have to complete their contributions?
Prompts will be assigned between April 23-30th, and posting begins June 1. They can, however, post their works all throughout the month of June. 
If a volunteer doesn’t have any public socials, do they have to post their art/fic/edits?
They may create an ao3 account, there’s plenty of time for them to request one.
Do artists need to attach their names to the art?
If they want to remain anonymous, they may post their work to ao3 and we’ll keep it anonymous within the collection.
Are simple prompt requests ok?
The prompts can’t be longer than 100 words, so simple prompt requests are ok.
Would I need to donate the equivalent of 5USD or am I okay donating 5 dollars in my currency? (non US based donations)
It has to be the equivalent of 5USD in whichever currency you use.
Can someone donate on the behalf of another person who is unable to do so? 
Yes, they only need to let us know about it. 
May I post anonymously to the collection?
Yes.
Do volunteers have to be a part of the discord server?
It’s not required but it is highly recommended.
Can you keep my email private/make sure it’s not shared outside of the mods?
Only the mods have access to the emails, you don’t need to worry about that.
Are there any preferences in terms of characterizations/appearances of characters?
No, but it is recommended to not be too specific so that the volunteers can work with their prompt as best as they can.
If donors have specific requests for how characters are drawn/written, will they be in contact with the volunteers assigned to their prompts? 
Yes, but at the end of the day, this isn’t commissioned fanwork, so the end result will be entirely up to the volunteer in question. Micromanaging will not be allowed.
If a volunteer is filling multiple prompts, can they decide how long each one is?
Yes they may.
Will prompts include tropes?
That is up to the donor, but being too specific with the prompt may make it hard for the assigned volunteer to fulfill it satisfactorily.
What will the prompts look like?
We will provide a form where the donors will be able to specify the pairing and their prompt. Please note: when listing pairings, use the Character Name x Character Name format (i.e. Remus x Sirius), versus ship names (i.e. Wolfstar), as some ship names aren’t well known, or vary across the fandom.
Does sketch mean actual sketch, or should there be a more polished final product?
Up to the artist, as styles and practices vary person to person. 
Can volunteers post their contributions on any social platforms?
Yes, they can.
Should writers characterize based on their own headcanons, or based off the wishes of the prompter?
The priority is fulfilling the prompt as it’s been given, but the volunteers can find a middle ground if they’re not entirely comfortable with something.
Where/who can I contact if later questions arise?
You can send an ask to the MWPP blog, or you can send an email to [email protected]. All mods tumblr urls are listed on the MWPP blog, and all mods will be available to answer questions in the discord server as well. 
How will we navigate if a volunteer is assigned a prompt they are uncomfortable with?
You may contact the mods and we’ll change it, bit please only do so if the prompt is genuinely something you cannot work with, as reassigning prompts may be troublesome for the mods.
Will I have to explicitly state in the final product that it was created for the project?
Yes.
Do I have to post the fic/art/edit, or can I just send it to the prompter?
It needs to be posted, but it may be posted anonymously via ao3.
Can I participate as an artist with a collage rather than a drawing?
We won’t be accepting collages, as that is technically not original work and it wouldn’t be fair for the prompter.
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bengiyo · 2 days
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Cherry Magic Anime Ep 12 (Finale) Stray Thoughts
Last week, the boys made a right mess of themselves. Adachi went to visit Nagasaki to scout out the new position, and send a letter to Kurosawa while he was there. Thankfully, Kurosawa is a simp, and the letter accomplished its job. Kurosawa went to Nagasaki to see Adachi, and finally got to hear Adachi express clearly how much Kurosawa means to him. We left the two of them in bed, and Adachi likely no longer has his powers. Meanwhile, Tsuge tried to support Minato from a distance, but Minato chased after him and the two properly connected.
Thank you, Cherry Magic Anime, for confirming that Adachi could hear Kurosawa’s thoughts during their first encounter.
I like that this version dwelled in the loss of Adachi’s power, and what it meant for Adachi. I especially like that he asserts that it has little to do with the definition of a virgin and the physical realities of sex, and instead has to do with Adachi’s willingness to be open and vulnerable with Kurosawa.
My man Kurosawa is crying because he knows he’s loved and it’s what he deserves.
Okay, Adachi saying that Kurosawa’s warmth and scent are stronger now that he’s not hearing his thoughts is such an excellent detail. Good job, Cherry Magic Anime.
Hell yeah, Adachi! You should take on this new project that excites you, and also accept the inherent promotion! So happy that he’s serious about trusting Kurosawa and speaking openly about how excited he is about this opportunity. I like that he recognizes that his relationship with Kurosawa has made him braver.
Very funny that Adachi forgot about the power and that’s how Tsuge found out. I also like seeing Tsuge be impressed with Adachi taking a major step forward before him.
I have missed Fujisaki. I’m glad we got a little bit of her.
Oh boy. Adachi is being worn out from all of the difficulties that come with his new responsibilities.
I love Adachi going back to Tokyo to talk with Kurosawa about his anxieties. Recognizing that something bad could happen to either of them and no one would know about them is actually so frightening, and a genuine gay reality.
Adachi saying they should live together and Kurosawa putting a ring on it feels like the right balance for them.
Look at that splash of domesticity for both couples at the end as a treat.
They got married!! Fujisaki won!
What a lovely stinger at the end.
Final Verdict: 9, Highly Recommended. I really like this version of the entire cast. They’re far more flawed in a way that makes them a little less likable, but it also makes me empathize with all of them a lot more. I like that Rokkaku was such a dick early on to Adachi, so it lands when he finally starts to respect him properly and remember his name. I love how mundane Cherry Magic as a story is, despite the magic power. I absolutely loved this version, and it and the Thai version will stay on my recommendations list for a really long time. The Thai version may be the best show of the Cherry Magic stories, but this one has my favorite versions of the characters.
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a-d-nox · 3 days
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can you please make more synastry observations and asteroid ones too pleaseee? i miss you they were soo entertaining to read
working well together in synastry and composite
i'm going to work off of what i already have posted (no asteroids discussed after this post will be included or added after the fact). finally, i would like to state that NO TWO CHARTS ARE THE SAME. what i am about to list out does not mean you will for sure need these exact things (or all of these things) to be shy, nervous, and/or anxious around one another. if you don't understand my thought process, feel free to dm me with questions!
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libra (7°, 19°) or aquarius (11°, 23°) venus/mars and/or 7h libra (7°, 19°) or aquarius (11°, 23°)
these two can be partners in crime and great colleagues; very little gets in the way of them accomplishing a task. they have a sort of dance they do when working together - they don't need to communicate to get the work done.
7h venus
this is great if you guys work together long term - it is like having a co-ownership at a business or partnership at the same firm. venus person loves 7h person and 7h person looks at venus person as if they are their true equal.
11h libra (7°, 19°) or aquarius (11°, 23°)
this is just very easy alliance and partnership. these two cooperate well with one another.
11h venus
these are allies - it is a ride-or-die connection that these two have it is very rare that either person will turn against each other. venus person will treat 11h person as their only friend, while 11h person will be extremely loyal and wishes to help the venus person to be the best version of themselves possible.
11h neptune
this is one of those unlikely alliances that just end up working well together. neptune person sees 11h person's vision and wants to help them come true, while 11h person sees the beauty in idealist and optimistic neptune person.
11h uranus
these people are unstoppable; they will do whatever it takes to make it happen. 11h person see eye to eye with innovative uranus person. uranus person likes that 11h person is great at having the connections it takes to move their projects forward.
armstrong (asteroid 6469) positively aspecting aldrin (asteroid 6470)
these two can go where no one has before - they are willing to do what people have never attempted before. armstrong person relies on aldrin person to be the brains of the operation, while aldrin person relies on the armstrong person to do the heavily lifting. together they are comfortable trying new and improbable things.
donar (2176) / thora (299) positively aspecting loke (4862)
these two will attempt to fool the world around them. donor/thora person is often talked into something silly/foolish by loke person. loke person is the mastermind of the project, while donor/thora person is the muscle power to make it happen.
prometheus (1809) positively aspecting athene (881) / pallas (2)
together these two can create something amazing. prometheus person creates the bare bones of their project, while athene/pallas person breaths life into it and gives it character.
vergilius (asteroid 2798) positively aspecting dante (asteroid 2999)
vergilius person will protect dante person at all costs. vergilius person is a sort of guide, confidant, and sage for dante person. dante person looks up to and greatly appreciates vergilius person. together they can traverse even the most difficult terrains.
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like what you read? leave a tip and state what post it is for! please use my "suggest a post topic" button if you want to see a specific post or mythical asteroid next!
click here for the masterlist
click here for more composite & synastry observations regarding the luminary and planetary
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greenerteacups · 3 days
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🍬🔪
For the ask game if you wish
🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character
Ooh. Okay. Fuck it: Canon Hermione Granger would make a terrible Healer, and she gets shoehorned into playing as a cleric when she's obviously a glass cannon.
To be clear, there are a lot of Healer!Hermiones that I've read and liked, and I don't hate it as a headcanon. It's entirely possible to develop her into someone for whom that career would make sense, and that's the fic writer's prerogative to do. But the only times we see her canonically healing people is when (a) Harry or Ron are injured and (b) there are no competent healers, wizards, or adults on hand to help. That's all. She doesn't show any special interest in Potions or Herbology, or other subjects aligned with medicine; if anything, she's really into history and politics, since that's what she seems to read outside of her studies. She also gets freaked out when Harry or Ron injure themselves, which is completely fair, but probably not a great quality for a career where seeing horribly injured people comes in the job description. All in all, I just don't think she has the patience or the stomach for it; for what it's worth, I think she'd sooner be an Auror than she'd be a Healer (and she'd sooner be an Auror than Harry would, but that's a different conversation).
🔪 ⇢ what’s the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?
In order to write Herbology and Potions classes, I've read a probably unusual amount about poisonous plants that are native to the British aisles. I also did a deep dive into late nineteenth-century British art to figure out how Grimmauld Place probably would have been decorated, and which hot Europe-based portrait artists would have been hired to do the Blacks.
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skunkox · 1 day
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Sweetheart and Darlin' Knew Eachother As Kids
I have 2 headcanons for this. I would, however, like to preface this by saying that Darlin had done things ballet and / or figure skating before moving to Dahlia. Where it was enjoyed but still mostly forced upon Darlin, It was very much a choice for Sweetheart. This would be enjoyed in eachothers company.
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They first is that they met at a cotillion. They weren't supposed to dance together. Designated to sit at separate tables, but their chairs were back to back. In such close quarters and both having only recently awakend their cores, could feel the others aura. It only took a moment of eye contact for mistivouse smirks to down their faces.
They didn't have much time between the ending of meets and being picked up, but the two concocted a plan to have at least a little fun.
They hijacked the ball. At least, the closing dance portion of it. Smash Mouths' "All Star" blared on the computer. After fained confusion fron the both of then, Sweetheart having pretended to have just come back from the restroom, began dancing. It was only a matter of seconds before the other children joined.
Disappointed parents began grabbing their children off of the dance floor. The two were both yanked off by their respective parents. Sweetheart in trouble for having used their powers around the unempowered. Darlin' for embarrassing their parents. They only had enough time to wave to each other one last time.
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The second Headcanon is that they were in a larger friend group as kids (5). The only empowered in the group. Sweetheart rode a bike while Darlin' a skateboard. Outside of the group, Darlin and Sweetheart spent the most time together at their practice. Often partnered up together because Darlin' would become too awkward and stiff to work with anyone else.
Their free time was spent at the skatepark. Sweetheart used to carry a camcorder. Catching fails and the kids being general punks. Sometimes, the group would pass the camera around and share their hopes and dreams.
What are those hopes and dreams? I'm not telling yet.
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Regardless of the situation the two lost touch. When Sweetheart could make it to pack meetings, Darlin avoided and dodged them like the plauge. They didn't want them to see the husk of who they once were. Nor to feel they'd have to open up more to their pack. Mentions felt high enough already, and the last thing they wanted to see was for an old friend to turn away from them in favor of a mate. So Darlin turned away first.
Sweetheart couldn't understand why they never wanted to talk. And it hurt. Maybe that's how growing pains were. But did it have to be? They connected so easily before. They felt close before, regardless of the physical time spent together. Milo asked about the situation, but they were always vague about it.
"They just seemed familiar. " is what they'd usually say. If Milo were to ask Darlin themselves, they'd play dumb. This also would become a strain on Darlin's relationship with the pack.
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I am very much so projecting my version of Darlin' and Sweetheart. I always see stuff for Angel and Babe being close. And for obvious reasons. I'm not big on Milo's videos for the simple fact I absolutely hate horror. My imagination is a little too vivid for it. But I do enjoy his main story and would like to do more with Sweetheart as a character.
This is probably a part one. The second or maybe third installment should be a fic if there is one. Which version of the story do you like better? I'm leaning towards thr larger friendgroup story but it's funny thinking of these two pre-teens absolutely reaking havoc at a fancy party.
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wraithee · 7 months
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Imagine if Aziraphale runs heaven like the bookshop and he’s just hanging out doing absolutely nothing but shuffling papers around to look busy while keeping inconsistent office hours and tracking Crowley back on earth all day long and stress snacking, and that’s what ends up ruining heavens plans for the second coming.
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remember this? well. let's go!
both ena and an have pretty famous fathers, and it was always somewhat expected of them to be worthy of their legacy, in some way. both of them were told, "of course you're good at art - you're shinei's daughter!" and "of course you're good at singing - you're ken's daughter!" respectively.
they were always perceived via their fathers, not allowed to step outside their shadow and be seen for themselves. they couldn't be ena or an.
and, you know, for a time, they went along with it. i mean, they were good at what they were doing.
but then... all comes crashing down.
for ena, there's the obvious bullshit that's going on with shinei. completely destroying her. because she admired her father, because he was the reason she wanted to do art to begin with, and he told her to her face that she would never be good enough.
her entire world fell apart, that day.
because no matter what she says, ena wants the approval of her father more than anything else. she wants him to tell her that she's worthy of being his daughter, that all her hard work amounts to something; anything.
but then, there's the eventual revelation that she wasn't anything, actually. she wasn't special.
everyone was better than her.
before, ena was a fish in a small pond, and of course, she was among the best. but now she's been dropped in a vast ocean, and she's small, and insignificant.
devoured by all the other fish.
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one of them - and admittedly, the most important of them all - being futaba. she joined after ena, but she proved herself in much less time than her. and, even succeeded where ena failed - she never gave up, even when she was harshly criticised. never regressing artistically. never running away from art.
and there's something else, somewhere deep down - a fear. a fear that nightcord will abandon her when they realise she can't keep up with them. that she's not as good as they thought she was.
what will happen of her, then? she'll be all alone. unloved.
an goes through something similar.
she meets kohane, and she decides that this person is going to be her partner. that they're going to surpass THE rad weekend together, that no one could be better for this task but her.
but when she starts that relationship, it's with the assumption that she'll always be the teacher and that kohane will always be the student.
not in a mean, or pretentious way, no, not at all. simply, an was always told there was no way she couldn't surpass rad weekend, since she was ken's daughter. in her small pond, she was also among the very best.
but then, an realises something, too.
kohane is much better at everything than she is.
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very similarly to ena's situation with futaba, kohane made much more progress in barely a year than an has in years. taiga - one of the old RADers, and somewhat of an uncle for an - recognised her potential, and asked to train her. not an, but kohane.
and of course, an is happy to know that! because that's her partner and friend, and an is happy to see her grow more confident and get better every day. because she cares. because she loves her.
but there's something in her chest - something that hurts and aches. she has to face the fact that she's not as good as she thought she was, that she isn't worthy of her father's legacy. that she isn't worthy of being kohane's partner, that she might be holding her back.
that she might be abandoned. left behind to rot.
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what will happen of her, then? she'll be all alone. unloved.
to me - ena and an are two kids suffering under the weight of a legacy that's too heavy for them to carry, but that they can't let go of. they're also struggling with seeing their peers succeed where they repeatedly fail. they're all about being terrified of being abandoned because they're not good enough.
they're both confronted by this fact.
and it terrorises them.
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wi5teria · 11 days
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I dip my hands into locks of gold, like sunlight dripping from your crown...
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The aftermath of it all. . .
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What can I say? They're my favorite.
#twdg#twdg clouis#clouis#twdg clementine#twdg louis#sometimes they creep back into my mind and i'm like 'ah yes' like a crow admiring a pretty stone they found years ago and kept#also thank you pi for the screenshots. i used to have a whole folder full of them but that was when i was doing themed nights#the source for these is me i just have a random document full of dynamics and ship things i enjoy because.....i dunno i like keeping track#and so many of them apply to clouis but there's also an overlap of with clouis and rose/alistair [my warden from origins and alistair] like#alistair's romance route is like an evolved matured and extended version of clouis sksksks gee i wonder if i have a type#look you present me with a character who deflects with humor and isn't taken seriously by the rest of the group and the longer you know the#the more you realize how high they've built a wall around themselves and how *unwell* they really are and how they're not as sunshine#as they present themselves and also they avoid leadership and responsibility until they grow closer with someone who pushes them#and they end stronger and more balanced as a person while finding the affection they've craved#and also there's the daddy issues#present me with that character as a romantic option and i'm in no questions asked okay i don't want the mean broody one that's meh to me#i want the one that has every reason to be broody but chooses not to be because they have a completely different defense mechanism#and a warped sense of themselves and self-esteem issues they leave unaddressed until forced to face them#i'm just saying i'm aware that i have a type i'm always going to gravitate toward clouis nearly checks all the boxes#also the lack of clouis these days? my crops are thirsty and i have too many ongoing projects to do anything about it other than this sksks#so until i make time to finish my long ass louis/clouis analysis this is the best i can provide for now
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run-of-the-milf · 10 months
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Gonna say something that'll piss off a lot of the tua fandom.
Klave is not going to be endgame. Dave is not magically coming back. His story was sad and their love was beautiful but the character's purpose was served and now he's gone. He taught Klaus so much and Klaus has grown and grieved and carries his memory always. But Klaus knows he's never going to have that again.
Klaus is different from Viktor and Allison - he isn't trying to change the world to get what he wants back. He already tried to get him back and it only made things worse. His whole character development and grief process has been lightyears ahead of his siblings. He knows death and he's learned too much to think he can play god.
It would be lovely for Klaus to have another romance in s4, but I don't think he really needs one.
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sunlit-haruka · 2 months
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I don't know if this still happens cause I'm not too involved with the Fuuta side of the community, but when I was first getting into Milgram I remember being somewhat annoyed at how much I saw Fuuta's murder being watered down to just "Haha twitter user was twittering". And I still feel that way, not because I think Fuuta should be specially punished for his murder, but because in a series full of murders that anyone could commit when placed into their shoes, Fuuta is the character that I think exemplifies the fact that any of these prisoners could be you if you were placed into different circumstances.
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sankatsuka · 2 months
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Backlit Lens Flare and CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY Discussion - Reigniting The Passion Lost to Peer Pressure
Everyone wants to have a place to belong, where the hard work we pour into the things we love will be seen and appreciated by people. But what happens when you decide you will never find this place and resign yourself to a life of solitude, only to be proven wrong by a group of people who insist on your wholehearted hard work? And it only later dawns on you that you will someday have to part ways and you will lose the miraculous place you finally found.
This is what I like to think Rui Kamishiro encapsulates - the battle between being yourself and wanting a place to belong. How easy it is to get swayed from what you love when you think you've found this place and start to subconsciously dedicate your passion to this place instead, to the point that if you're not aware enough, you can forget the feelings in your original passion (resulting in the hesitation and doubt in Curtain Call). After all, nobody is the same, and if you focus too much of your passion on them, that passion becomes about them and not yourself. Ultimately, it is how not acknowledging a healthy boundary with people who are different from you can affect your passion (Shiho as a character is very integral to this).
Warnings:
I believe the entire WxS plot is meant to be misdirection.
Personal interpretation of Rui and several characters by inferring from text.
I believe Rui is a flawed person with no bad intentions, so there will be criticism of his character here. I really suggest turning away if it upsets you.
Spoilers for all WxS unit stories up till Backlit Lens Flare (as well as for Saki, Shiho, Akito, Mafuyu and Mizuki's characters up to their most recent stories)
Edit (11/2/2024): Made multiple edits as always, but biggest change is talking more about the foils in CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY and Kitty's message. Edit (12/2/2024): Compulsory mention of Rui's mom and how he was set up for failure from way back then. Edit (12/2/2024): Expansion on the parallels between Rui and Mafuyu - what it is that makes them the CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY and Jackpot Sad Girl. And a summary on how three commission parallels supports this interpretation of CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY about Rui's characters. Edit (13/2/2024): Lets add a bit more about how Resonate with You criticizes Rui's actions in Curtain Call. AND MANJI ALSO BEING A SLANG MEANING EXCITEMENT, STILL APPLIES TO TSUKASA IDC!!
Rui's character in the story starts off as someone who has thrown the part of himself who wants to have fun making things with people after being repeatedly let down by them. The early times with Wonderlands x Showtime helped him remember that desire from childhood to find a place that accepts that desire, that he criticizes Tsukasa for not appreciating WxS - for not realizing the best shows can't be accomplished without friends.
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"--The best shows can't be done alone."
Following the fallout, Tsukasa and WxS' continued insistence and appreciation of him makes him start to see them as a place he can finally belong to. The place he's searched for for so long since childhood. That when he saw Tsukasa get hurt, he became swayed from doing the things he wanted to do for the first time and he hadn't even noticed it - because Tsukasa might leave him like his classmates had, so he has to hold back so as to not disappoint him further. This resulted in Tsukasa and Ruis second argument, with Tsukasa being angry at Rui for lying and holding back - which I later argue is the exact same feelings in his FUZAKERUNA in CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY.
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"This is surprising. I didn't think I'd ever feel this way." "Being afraid of losing your place, and then being unable to face the actors who seriously respond to you - this is a failing as a director."
However, this entire ordeal ended in Rui acknowledging his weakness, putting the whole deal behind them and moving on with the show, as KAITO advised. (Spoiler: it isn't weird at all to say that this happens again, with how he deals with it so indifferently like this.)
And then in Curtain Call, he becomes painfully aware that everyone may leave someday for their dreams--
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"Someday, the day we will have to depart will come... For both me, and everyone."
Doesn't this just seem like a repeat of Halloween in a different way? He's scared they'll all leave him alone. One can say that Curtain Call ignited the exact same fear of being left alone and losing your place that Rui felt in Halloween - and his reaction feels exactly the same too: acknowledge it, put it behind you and move on to doing what is best for the best shows. After all, Rui lives for the best shows, because it is what makes him most happy - albeit Backlit Lens Flare suggests how he doesn't actually fully remember the joy and passion for shows he had as a child (discussed later). The best way to put it is - Rui feels like a walking corpse of his childhood.
Normally, when you realize this possibility of parting in the future, you talk to your friends about this (see: Saki Focus 3, Get Over It). But Rui refrains from talking to the people he should be talking to (WxS) and proceeds to go for the most obvious decision for his dream by joining Arklands. Only after Asahi turns him away does he go for the next obvious option he sees - the reckless decision that he would do everything in his power to achieve everyone's dreams together. And he can so confidently chase it because he's smart, only to be put down in Backlit Lens Flare lol.
Rui has really just been powering his way through the things he finds unpleasant, as KAITO had told him to in Halloween, ignoring the bad parts and doing everything for the sake for the best shows. You can really, really argue that KAITO's advice in Halloween seems very, very morally ambiguous now lol. He doesn't think ahead of what is the best choice and what would make him happiest - it's as if he's avoiding the very line of thought of how he would do post-WxS. Compared to Shiho in Focus 1, 'Resonate With You', who shows how she has thought it through and is happy enough just spending time with Leo/need for leisure - Rui doesn't even reach this line of thought of what happens next.
I think that he avoids thinking properly about these stuff because he wouldn't have a proper answer to it. Can he really trust Asahi when many other people have disappointed him after showing some interest before this? On the other hand, he's argued with Tsukasa twice and everyone is still enthusiastic - WxS is the only place he's ever felt secure.
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"There were a few people who saw my ideas and said, 'it would be interesting if we could do it'." "But even those people gradually became reluctant with the more new ideas I brought to them."
It may generally be underestimated in the story just how much Rui doesn't inherently trust people and actors.
Even CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY begins with 'Nobody's listening anyway. Music's all just fashion, players leaving the field after devouring dead sounds one night.' which can be interpreted as people who became reluctant after they spent too long around Rui as he says to KAITO above, innit.
And then, Backlit Lens Flare happens and Rui encounters ??? (Sakaki). Sakaki immediately identifies the problem with Bakuno's acting, pinpointing it to the directors instead of the actor. Rui was not able to.
Remember, the freelance option isn't permanent - there's the possibility someone may be recruited away (It's a story for another day that he is only really worried about Tsukasa instead of the whole WxS but doesn't realize this). Rui paying attention to their growths first of all before his own is testament to how he's trying to make sure they quickly grow so they can achieve their dreams together:
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"...It seems it became good stimulation for both of them right away." "...I also need to more proactively study from this opportunity."
So even now, Rui is more worried about WxS over himself. He prioritizes making sure they are getting something out of the freelancing gig over himself. Only after watching them was he stimulated to do his best too - and here comes the question, where did his drive to be proactive for his own passion go to?
Sakaki's ingenuity finally pops this question to Rui's mind. Had Rui's brain not been filled with the worry of losing his place, he may have been able to think more clearly and just as quickly reach the same conclusion as Sakaki. If he had been filled with thoughts of what was satisfying for himself instead of how he could stay with everyone, he may have been able to create a much better film (see: Shiho Focus 3, Stick to Your Faith). In fact, why is he even so bothered about falling behind Sakaki, when Rui isn't even an adult or a professional director himself?
It's not normal to be bothered about that: Nene was never hard on herself for not being as good as Kazamatsuri, because it's a given she's far away. But she does get upset with herself when she realizes she had looked down on Sakurako and naively seen her as an equal. You only react that way with people you see as equals if you're secure.
Perhaps, the passionate person Rui used to be would have admired Sakaki and want to learn from him out of a pure love for shows instead. And not be so bothered about how he was falling behind professionals.
We see Rui fail twice in the story: not figuring out the problem with the scene, and not thinking ahead of personalizing the script like Ohara had. (There is a third time too: how Tsukasa and WxS seem so moved by Bakuno's performance that Rui played no part in - meaning there are others who could easily replace him - if the emotions in this discussion hold true). And it's no wonder it would have him start questioning and blaming his obsession with WxS for it - if he had not been preoccupied with them, he may have avoided his failures altogether, and even if he did, he wouldn't have been this upset.
It's like a hit to his ego. Is how he's acting and behaving really the same boy who loved shows and would do anything for a show that would satisfy him?
Right now, it's as if Rui is trying hard to protect his position as a talented genius that surpasses everyone so WxS will need him for their dreams and want him around. No one can replace him; only he can achieve their dreams for them.
But Sakaki and Ohara prove him wrong.
The closing lines of Backlit Lens Flare, where he focuses on his own feelings towards directing instead of anything WxS learned, implies this self-realization of how he had been behaving. Rui is finally focused on himself.
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"I'm disappointed that I didnt come up with this method, but strangely enough, I feel refreshed." "Directing... really is interesting."
FIRST UP. WHY DID YOU NEED TO COME UP WITH THE METHOD. SECONDLY, WHY ARE YOU REFRESHED. It makes sense to me as someone who's been carried away a lot: when you realize you lost sight of your original intentions and began worrying more about so many unnecessary things, you feel bitter at your mistake but relieved and refreshed you've finally been woken up.
To me, all of these feel like they're pointing to Rui being afraid of losing his place in WxS. So he has to be capable of solving everything, achieving everyone's dreams, so they will need him for it and they can keep staying this way. Before this, it seemed like a normal human emotion he had just never experienced before, but now, it's starting to show it's actually detrimenting his passion.
This is what I believe the theme of trends are playing into in CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY - doing anything you can to make sure there will be people to hear and appreciate your music, and the spite in realizing you've lost yourself in that pursuit. Money is the artificial love you receive by catering to people so they would stay and listen to you. It's heartless, but following his character, it seems the crowd he's referring to is WxS. Because they have their strong individualistic dreams and just won't simply stay with him as he wants them to, he has to keep worrying about keeping up with them (Tsukasa mainly):
But still, here, there, everywhere, loners, manji, Gen Z, even monkeys want it.
Loners=Rui Manji (a sign of good things to come)=Tsukasa (being surrounded by good luck charms; kanji 天 being associated with heaven; inviting Rui to WxS) (edit: manji is also a slang for excitement, which Tsukasa literally is for Rui) Gen Z=Nene (digital age, playing video games) Monkey=Emu (in Rui's picnic card and Emu in Sky's Edge)
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(In NY2, Emu ended up drawing tons of big luck omikuji, and Tsukasa is surrounded by monkeys in Island Panic - so you can suggest their roles are reversed. But the robot monkey Tsukasa in picnic suggests Tsukasa isn't a real monkey.)
Curtain Call and Backlit Lens Flare together show how not addressing and expressing fears properly and simply moving on changes nothing. Self-awareness and powering through is useless advice - anyone who's had troubles with lovers, friends and family know you need to talk and accomodate each other. Or not, is it even feeling loved and cared anymore, isn't it just about control then?
In Resonate with You, Shiho makes Leo/need think through their choice to join her into becoming a professional, rather than accepting them right off the bat. She knows from her prior experience working with people that half-hearted musicians would only fail, suffer and drop out. It is only by Leo/need wholeheartedly declaring their intentions of facing music sincerely and seriously that Shiho is convinced that they can all do it together for sure. This is such a contrast to Rui in Curtain Call where he decides on his own that he will find a way for WxS to achieve their dream together, while barely thinking at all. And he winds up focusing so much on making sure WxS stays together. You need to think it through, face the future seriously and talk properly. NOT JUST LEAVE IT THERE!!
Or else you'll lose sight of your original motivation from focusing too much on things that don't really matter as much to you: you'll just end up half-hearted.
Further proof that Backlit Lens Flare is Rui's realization of his half-heartedness since Curtain Call, is that Tsukasa gets angry at him in CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY like he does in Halloween. It isn't even a desperate shout to save someone - it's like a look of pure judgmental disappointment, as if they've been through this already. Stop lying.
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He already shouted in anger in Halloween. If that didn't reach Rui, then there was no point in being all angry anymore.
Rui was repeating Halloween, trying so hard to protect the place he belongs to and forgot what he himself truly wants. From there, the lyrics in the entire CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY are self-explanatory: what happened to the things you wanted to sing? (I was so happy with the lyrics because it was exactly what I was thinking in Curtain Call but no one seemed to care).
One thing you can never take away from Rui is that he is a very, very passionate guy. He loves what he does that he would spend every waking hour of his day working on it. Even if he's become a shell of his former self, his body is still naturally drawn to shows (Samsa Kanade reference heh). And Rui himself believes himself to be purely passionate too. So when he realizes that passion has been thoroughly dirtied, it makes sense he's as angry as he is in CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY.
In Anni 2, Rui says he didn't know what he wanted to do like Mafuyu, but then he corrects himself to say he THOUGHT he knew.
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"Actually, in the past, I didn't know what I wanted to do." "No... I should say that I thought I knew, but I actually didn't know at all."
For a brief moment, Rui thought he was just like Mafuyu with nothing to call his own. Until he quickly remembers that he did indeed have something he wanted to do, but claims to have been mistaken.
Why did you briefly relate to a girl who felt like she had nothing she wanted to do like everyone else, if that isn't a sign of his current state of mind - feeling like he has no dreams like WxS, and having to keep up with them so that he can feel like he belongs (discussed later in the parallels with Cinema). His lost passion became more evident at this point of the story.
If you 'thought you knew', then that means it was once a genuine feeling too. Even if you're alone, doing what you love is still fun - Shiho in her Focus 3, 'That Day, The Sky Was Far Away' demonstrates this. Although she had been let down by the bandmates, she was still fine alone because music made her feel better. And she even inspired Mihane because of her enthusiasm. After all, what you love to do should make you happy to some extent.
In comparison, Rui seems to have forgotten that shows were actually fun in middle school (probably because Stick to Your Faith never happened for him). When he approached Mizuki, he was standoffish and didn't think to introduce Mizuki to the fun of shows even when they expressed some interest in it. Probably because he couldn't even remember it himself. But being able to make that decision suggests he did still have some semblance of emotions that felt like shows were fun. Once again, a walking corpse of his chiildhood.
In the end, it's like he already lost this original joy for shows since middle school, and then grew even more confused about what made him happiest with the new joy he experienced after finding a place in WxS. He hasn't been able to wholeheartedly enjoy his passion because he's been continuously rejected, and he thought he was having fun when WxS accepted him - but in the end, that fun was from finally finding a place.
Update: Tetrad gives more implications of how Rui had gone astray post-Curtain Call. Tsukasa and Rui sing together, "We're facing the same direction", but Rui appears troubled. It's like Rui can't declare that he is chasing his dreams as confidently as the rest of WxS. Deep down, a part of him probably knew this even before Backlit Lens Flare happened but was afraid of facing it.
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I would further go on to associate CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY to both Kitty and Cinema which its imagery resembles. The card set takes place in Shibuya where Kitty takes place in, and Cinema uses the same director's cut + Tsukasa's trained card directly mentions Cinema on the billboard.
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There's also the naming that is clearly based on Jackpot Sad Girl - which I think just goes to highlight how both Rui and Mafuyu have the power through it mindset that it lands them dead and sad respectively: people need to reconcile their differences with others to truly love and feel alive (Rui) and people can't endure stress for too long without getting depressed (Mafuyu). Both ignored their human needs and thus this is where they wound up.
The parallel with Kitty feels like it's also within the overall messaging - how facing things can lead to losing yourself even more when you aren't mentally prepared and have no clear-cut answer (sounds similar to what Rui carelessly did in Curtain Call, doesn't it?). In Mafuyu's case, she seemed about ready to change herself again to please her mother, and in Mizuki's case, opening up to Niigo would make them more sensitive to what they say and probably even change themselves so as to not be left alone. Mizuki has even expressed this sentiment once by dressing as a boy in middle school, when they already knew they loved cute things since childhood and was even reaffirmed by their sister.
In Our Survival and Escape, the point is made that it's BECAUSE Mizuki never opened up to Niigo that they were able to protect their heart. Compare this to Rui, who bore everything about himself to WxS by not holding back with his performances and past and thus gained their unconditional acceptance. As a result, he becomes swayed by them when he realizes that things would come to an end and becomes preoccupied with stopping it even at the cost of himself - his passion. If Mizuki had similarly put their utmost trust in Niigo like this, it wouldn't be surprising either if they quickly get swayed to stop expressing themselves too if one of them ever expressed dismay (hinting that they would leave).
Thus, in order to find the answer to real love, you have to protect your heart first, even if it means running away and distancing yourself from others (Kitty). But unlike Mizuki, Rui was taught from childhood to simply not care about what people say, so he has never been aware of just how much words can affect you (compare the advice Mizuki's sister and Rui's mom gave them: completely different). This winds him up in CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY, where he's unknowingly adjusting himself for WxS to not leave him.
As for Cinema, both songs capture how Akito and Rui's struggles and fears at the time feel like the exact same - being left behind and losing your place because you weren't enough, to the point of losing who you really are (Akito pushing himself to be passionate to match everyone else, Rui falling into the trap of peer pressure to match everyone else. What they envy in 'everyone else' is how they want things that Akito and Rui don't feel like they really care about and view as meaningless. But in truth, they don't care about it only because they're more concerned about belonging - they've always had it deep down in them.).
But in Akito's case, VIVID BAD SQUAD directly reaches out for him when he pushes himself far too much and forces himself to suffer to make up for his lack of talent. That's why Akito is reassured that even at his weakest and most pathetic, there will be people there who refuse to leave him alone. So Cinema feels like Akito freely lamenting on how he's different from the people, that he can't keep up with them, but with VBS by his side, he feels like it's fine to find and pursue who he truly is.
On the other hand, CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY feels like Rui's suppressed spite from having to keep up with WxS in order to not be left alone. Because everyone else will betray him, it has to be and can only be WxS who've endured him until now. It's the first time he found people who would stay, so he's desperate not to lose them that he would subconsciously change himself so he can keep matching their needs. And the realization makes him spiteful, because he's lost what was fun for him from that need to change for others to stay. And he's left to stay lost to the very end, because the only way right now for him to be himself and stop worrying is by others matching him instead, but there is no way to 100% control people - compared to Akito who found his answer by coming to terms with the impossibility to control yourself to be someone else. Because VBS was there to accept him as he was when he was trying so hard to be someone else.
Rui will probably eventually realize he has to just accept he's lost his passion from the fear of being alone and stop lamenting controlling everything around him, once he gets tired of it and reaches his limit like Akito in Stray Bad Dogs.
Suddenly everyone started up onto a nonsense scenario (Whatever you do, wherever you look, there's a traffic of influencers.)
It's just like a movie, exactly like a movie. (But still, here, there, everywhere, loners, manji, Gen Z, even monkeys want it.)
No matter where you go, there's a story. (Just give me a punchline, its meaning can be whatever.)
Cinema and CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY are like the perspectives of two boys who feel like outsiders to the world, but one is actively trying change himself to belong somewhere and the other finds himself suddenly facing peer pressure when he used to not care about belonging somewhere. It's even contrasted in Akito's customer service front and Rui's indifference to school terrorism that they are foils of one another in a society. And probably why Akito hates Rui too - for taking any means necessary to achieve what he wants without a care for people, when Akito has spent his life working hard to be equals to people in order to belong.
[More similarities in lyrics, in no particular order (CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY in brackets):
Traffic’s already jammed up now. Oh well, nothing I can do about that anyway (Whatever you do, wherever you look, there's a traffic of influencers.)
“It wasn’t supposed to be like this.” "What was it supposed to be like then?" (What happened to things you wanted to sing about?)
Back then I'm sure it was there. The thing that I envisioned was there. When was it that I... (There must have been something you wanted to sing about.)
What are you playing at? Who are you trying to be? There's no way you could be that, right? (At this rate this will never end. What you want definitely isn't money.)]
Maybe it's coincidence, but the lyrics in Cinema also reference Curtain Call very early on:
Someday it'll be bye-bye when the end comes, so Smile for the curtain call and applause.
Cinema is accepting of it and faces it head-on. Rui still avoids it.
And Cinema also captured what happened in Backlit Lens Flare with Bakuno. Something Rui couldn't figure out on his own without Sakaki and Emu:
If you're not suited for the role, Then just rewrite the script!
This is as if implying Akito realizes early on that people are all different, and there may come a time you have to part because of your differences. So you don't have to keep worrying about fitting in - try your best to be yourself instead and smile when it all ends.
This is something that Rui hasn't faced at all, so it's pretty meta that he hadn't thought of matching the actor's individualities. It seems he's lived with the belief that directors have to adjust themselves according to the level they believe the actors are on and actors have to work their hardest to live up to the director's wishes at all times - because the director knows best. Instead of truly understanding their actors for who they are as individuals and what they individually need.
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"I always try to cast actors in a way that brings out their strengths." "That's why I always get you to play the role of a type that is easiest for you to match."
And this becomes a regret for Rui in the same story - realizing that he hadn't thought enough about what Tsukasa really wanted and needed.
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"...I feel a little regretful that I hadn't thought that far."
Nene's surprise at Rui's words further imply that this isn't how he normally is. That he wouldn't be thinking so much about people and their personal needs.
It isn't therefore surprising that he agrees with and commits to the mindset that he has to power through his emotions without speaking to anyone. He expects that from his actors, and applying it to real life, it means that your role and scenario have already been decided from birth and what was left was living up to it. It's frighteningly similar to the lyrics in Engeki, which I wasn't even thinking about. Except it wasn't forced on him but rather something Rui decided on his own, with no harmful intent from the people who fed that mindset. Even before KAITO - it was his mother who unknowingly instilled this in him:
"People are people, I am myself. If you take care of what you like, someday you'll be able to make friends too. Like how I met your dad." (i.e. don't bother with the painful things around you, just keep doing what you do and keep going until you get there.)
And hence why this commission is full of firey anger. The story tramples on the way Rui has lived until now, proving him wrong when he thought he finally found his answer by powering through his fear of losing WxS. How it made him realize that he had at some point been driven by something petty like being with friends forever and lost the passionate part of him, the one who would do anything to satisfy himself. He's realized he's no longer having fun like the child he used to be, evident from the lyrics that start off with how he no longer has anything he wants to convey.
"Now let's all laugh. Aren't views more important than art? A terrible price for the virus. So what will you do? Is that really fine?" The lyrics are as if Rui is finally realizing that everything he's been doing, making people smile up until now, has been just for views (for WxS to stay around), and it finally makes him question, is this what he really wants??? Where did all the passion, fun and self-satisfaction that he thought he was making shows for went to???
(This is a more literal translation, the popular TL translates it as Then what do we do? Was that how it was supposed to go?)
I don't know if it's clear now - but in conclusion, CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY feels very much like Rui realizing how he was more focused on protecting his place over enjoying what he does. The first lines of the song do seem to be screaming a spitefulness in not being able to just do what you enjoy: "No one wants to listen (...), I don't have anything I want to convey (...)"
That's why CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY is an ironic name, appearing on the director's cut to imply they're filming a movie of Rui's life. How Rui had been living dead against his own self - falling victim to peer pressure (trends) to protect his place in WxS. Until Sakaki reminds him of the heights his true self wanted to reach and reignites the passionate fire for theatre inside him.
In summary, to simplify it, CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY's parallels come together to tell a complete story about Rui Kamishiro (biased but idc): 1) Jackpot Sad Girl: The unhealthiness of Rui and Mafuyu's mindset of powering through what they think they want without properly talking to people. 2) Kitty: How putting your trust in people can sway your heart and steer you away from what you truly want, something Mizuki knows and thus avoids but not Rui. 3) Cinema: A combination of Jackpot Sad Girl and Kitty - how a person with Rui's mindset is left feeling angry and confused when realizing he has lost himself from having his heart unexpectedly swayed by people. This is foiled by a complete opposite like Akito who has lived a life with no reason to truly call his own and is bitterly aware of how it is all because his life has always been completely defined by other people.
(Man, I LOVE the Cinema foils so much. Akito and Rui are such perfect opposites I LOVE THEM.)
And finally, from the end of CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY:
Devoid of soul, music remains silent Unheard lyrics conceal their essence; without playback, music loses its meaning. Thus, modern music is pronounced deceased.
YES. YES. DEVOID OF SOUL AS I SAID, HOW RUI KAMISHIRO FEELS LIKE A WALKING CORPSE OF HIS CHILDHOOD. PLAYBACK!!! LOOK BACK AT YOUR PAST AND FIND YOURSELF!!! REMEMBER THE JOY AND PASSION YOU CAN'T GIVE UP RUI-KUN!!! Stop trying to keep people around, face solitude and be brave: what's most important is to be yourself!
Backlit Lens Flare felt like a reawakening for Rui, and it's why it's one of the best stories alongside Pandemonium for me. If Tsukasa is completely avoidant, then Rui is full of blatant lies. But of course because the writers will never clearly describe the emotions in WxS stories, I can't confirm this is the intended interpretation. It's just my own personal interpretation that I enjoy best and makes most emotional sense to my personal experiences.
But my opinions are bound to change because there are soooo many ways of seeing things. For now, this is what I think of Rui Kamishiro in Backlit Lens Flare and CYBERPUNK DEAD BOY.
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