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hegoeshardasfuck · 1 month

Text

just follow my lead (you're in charge)

wordcount: 3.5K

tags: couch sex, loss of virginity, mild science/research kink, handjob, hermaphroditic qualities, thighs, a lil bit of body worship if you squint

synopsis: Epic realizes that sex can be good despite some bad past experiences, although, he's glad that Cross is the one in control instead of his boyfriend

note: i've been shipping epiccross since before it was cool folks, so glad to see it's starting to get some recognition. the tumblr girlies deserve some epiccross smut your honor. hope ya'll enjoy and if you did consider dropping a like or checking the Ao3 port.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/46693945

"So, you've never had sex before," the question is proposed as more of a generalized statement.

"I've had plenty of exams, and some experiments went wrong, but I don't know if tentacles really cue into a good first time bruh," he can't help the nickname that slips out, the monochromatic skeleton beside him looks appalled at the notions of the sentence, "so yeah, I've been on the receiving end of sex before," he sounds so confident in saying that sex is distinctly split up like that, one person gets pleasure and the other doesn't- it makes his friend want to scream.

He makes a small noise before speaking, "Epic, that's not actual sex, not the good sex at least, have you ever had sex after that?" Epic shrugged his shoulders.

"If I'm always gonna be on the receiving end it ain't much fun bruh," Epic explained, he could hear his friend give a groan, but the pause of his friend holding his skull in his hands gave him a chance to realize he was plotting, "Cross whatever you're planning, stop," Cross doesn't stop.

"What if I were to show you that sex can be fun?" Cross offered, "just me and you, in an entirely safe, judgement free environment, and you could leave at anytime you wanted if it got uncomfy- I think you would enjoy sex if it wasn't from a tentacle monster," theres almost a tinge of humor to what he says, Epic is hesitant to answer.

"Entirely safe, and judgement free?" He asked, the answer solidifying whether or not he says yes or no, his gaze is locked on Crosses.

Cross puts out a hand, "obviously dude, it'll be like, your first time, I won't ruin it," his voice is genuine, there's a sweetness to it that no one could resist; Epic sighs before shaking his hand.

"Alright bruh," he's smiling a bit as he speaks, "whenever you wanna do this shit feel free to spring it on me," the notion of 'whenever' makes Crosses soul pulse a little faster, but he beats down whatever blush is coming to his face to focus on the task at hand instead.

"Alright, cool," Cross said, voice shaky, he hovers his thumb over the pause button, "ready to continue our round of smash?"

Epics usual grin returns tenfold, "you know it! Get ready to lose bruh!" His enthusiasm would make Nightmare vomit on the spot, it makes Cross smile as he plays.

Epic is laying on the couch, one leg draped over the edge while the other is hitched, he has both of his hands behind his skull, so calm that he might as well be sleeping. He has his eyes closed, and there isn't really anything for him to do until Cross arrives. He already contemplated starting up smash bros, or season two of Mew Mew: Kissy Cutie, but, neither of those feel correct for today.

He hears the door open, Cross, footsteps get closer until they stop and Epic opens his eyes, lazily smirking.

"Sup bruh," the words come out smoothly, "you feeling ready to teach?" His question caught Cross off guard, but, his monochromatic friend still sits at the opposite end of the couch, looking a little bit shaky with purple peppering his cheeks.

"That depends dude, are you ready to learn?" Crosses question comes across almost a little bit playful, but Epic gives a nod.

"Of course bruh," Epic speaks like the answer should already be known, but he still tenses when Cross shifts himself over to be resting between his legs, one hand resting on his femur- Cross noticed.

"You promise me that you'll tell me stop if you really want me to?" Cross asked, Epic nodded, his joints still continued to lock up when Cross moved his hand further up the fabric till it rested at his pelvis, comfortably sliding between fabric; magic started to gather, but it was forced, he shoved phalanges between sacral holes to cut off the flow and Epic cried out, "don't you dare force an ecto for my pleasure, this is about you," his tone comes out much more demanding than he expected it to.

Epic nodded, dropping his hands from behind his hooded skull, "you could've told me earlier bruh," the phrase comes out as an undignified mutter, "it's not like there's any other way to form it," Cross quirked a brow.

"Trust me, if someone wants you to form they can force you," Cross said calmly, raising his hand from Epics pelvis and swiftly swiping it along vertebrae, Epic shuddered.

"I know that bruh, I'm not an idiot, I meant like, just having it happen," Epic tried to explain, hoping his point came across clear, he couldn't bring his explanation much further with Crosses spare hand circling his sacrum, a phalange drifting across the edges of one of the holes, it felt too good to be real putting all things into consideration.

Cross nearly laughed at the concept, "it happens a lot more often than you think dude," Epic refused to believe him, not until he's gotten proof on the matter at least, "of course, we can fuck bareboning it if you so desire," the shift in Epics expression is apparent.

"Naw, I'd like to see you try and test out your 'theory' I've yet to hear about bruh," the statement comes off as a challenge and Cross gladly accepts, he runs a phalange across the inner edge of Epics ribs, back to front and so close to his soul he can feel the intrusion inside his chest. He squirms a little bit, refraining from releasing any noise, phalanges dig into the couch upholstery and it gives away his current state.

"Okay dude," he says it almost chidingly, bringing the hand he used to circle Epics sacrum to the crest of his hips, he caught Epics shudder as he applied slight pressure to the bone, "you don't have to be quiet, it's just you and me, judgement free and all that," he squeezes one of Epics ribs while speaking and it draws a squeak from the purple skeleton.

Epic feels like he's being taunted, "alright bruh," he shakily pushes himself up a bit, meeting Crosses gaze with a fierce one, "make me cry out for ya if you wanna hear it so badly," he smirks as he speaks, but he has to bite back the sounds bubbling up as Cross pinches the tip of his rib.

Cross smirks all the same, "by the end of it all, I can almost assure you that you'll be in nirvana dude."

Epic gives of a hum of amusement even as magic starts to spark up when Cross runs a phalange across the edge of his ischium. He tries to force it down but fails miserably, he drops back down to the couch, the faintest sounds still escaping him. He bites his tongue when Cross drags phalanges through the coalesced purple magic webbing itself between the gaps, it's thick and sticks to bone naturally. Cross brings his hands to Epics spinal cord, running magic smeared fingers along the individual bones, the highly sensitive individual bones- Epics twisting and shuddering and trying to force down his own voice because he refuses to lose the challenge. He feels slimy with his own magic clinging to his vertebrae, and with the way its gathering, the pace of his soul starts to pick up.

"Stop, please," Epic blurts out, Cross backs away near instantly, raising his gaze to meet Epics as he holds up his hands.

"Yeah dude?" Cross asked gently.

There was a brief pause of hesitance, "I'm not really proud of how it looks bruh, Nightmare said it looked kinda ugly," Cross feels a pang of searing hate tear across him for a second but he shoots it down, "not sure you'd like it much."

"Don't listen to what that prick says, even if he is your boyfriend, he's my boss and trust me, he's hard on everyone, he probably meant well, and remember, judgement free," Cross said trying to reassure Epic on the matter, there was a shaky nod.

"Alright, feel free to continue," Epic said, raising a hand to give a thumbs up, Cross took it, their phalanges stuck together with the magic acting as adhesive, Cross gave a small 'fuck' in response to doing so.

Still, he returned his good hand back to the crest of Epics pelvic bone, dragging it down past the acetabulum where magic gathered heavily in pools, swiping it over the pubic arch briefly (Epic yelped in response and squeezed Crosses hand). Magic starts to form a little thicker, a little more swiftly, shooting down his femurs at that, but Cross keeps sliding his phalanges along Epics pelvis; following the ischial spine to the pelvic brim. A web of magic is intertwined between the sacrum and latching onto the pelvic brim. Cross trails a phalange along the inside of each individual sacral hole and he relishes in the reactions he got through all of it. From soft little pants to spasms, Epics range of reaction was impossibly broad and seemingly positive, but, he couldn't keep his eyes open easily.

When his ecto starts to fully fill out, shooting down his femurs in a plush purple and forming intricate anatomy at the same time from the ground up. Cross tried not to stare, he really did, but he had a hard time not letting his gaze latch onto the scars on Epics hips- jagged claw marks that gouged so far down they must've hit bone at one point. He ran phalanges across them, they were a more opaque shade than the rest, a lighter, foggier tone of purple. He barely caught the way Epic tensed at the touch and he retracted his hand, yanking Epics pants down a little further, there was hints of smaller scars that gripped his thighs.

When Cross doesn't do anything Epic starts to become worried, he gives a heavy sigh and Cross looks up. Epic dispels the magic keeping their hands stuck together and pulls his away, "told ya bruh, I knew you wouldn't like it."

"Hold it right there dude, I never fucking said I didn't like how it looked, did I?" Cross asked, his tone almost accusatory, Epic shook his head, "exactly, I was just taking a moment to take it all in, have some patience, you look amazing," he's hesitant to bring a hand to cup Epics cheek, but his friend leans into the promise of touch so he does, "the scars only make you stronger, tells people not to fuck with you," he smiles a bit as he speaks, so does Epic.

Epic brings a finger up to run along the edge of the tear in his eyes, "no doubt that this bad boy has scared off some fuckers," there's an air of humor to his voice but its snuffed out when Crosses fingers hover over his amethyst ecto, phalanges ghosting between lavender hued scars.

"Wanna continue?" Cross asked, he would be fine if Epic didn't, although a part of him wanted to simply take hold and ravish his friend, but, that would break their deal- he wouldn't break their deal.

Epic shrugs, "I mean, if we're this far in bruh, stepping back would be a waste of time," his tone is casual and his smirk is genuine, Cross returns it before firmly planting one of his hands on Epics thigh, he feels the tense and eases up his grip.

He slides his hand across the expanse of purple, he's never seen Epics ecto before, he's seen Dusts and Killers, even snuck a peak at Nightmares- but everything he's seeing right now is new to him. The contours of flesh, the pulse of Epics ley lines, the faint glow, it's all something he's never seen before despite the fact Epics seen his. He's wound up in this living room watching a movie with Epic when all of a sudden he's hard as a rock or wet as a river more times than he can count- so Epics used to it, even offered a hand. Cross doesn't know Epics pleasure points, Cross doesn't know what'll garner a heavy reaction, its like he only knows what they wrote in the textbook for skeleton sex, and that isn't much. He simply hopes that Epic can't tell he's starting to get worried he won't be able to hold up on showing him that it can be fun.

His phalanges squeeze where magic is laid on thinly, right at Epics hips, he makes sure to lay his fingers between the scars instead of directly overtop; Epic shivers and nearly moans. One hand stays planted at his hip, digging into the flesh ever so subtly, the other slowly makes its way ever closer to Epics cock. Now, Cross isn't one to compare, but damn, he could break himself with that thing if he wanted to (he's thought that about all of his partners). Epics tenses become closer in interval as Crosses cooling touch edges ever closer to the base of his cock, his breathing picking up pace and he freezes all together when Cross drags his palm flat along the underside. He pulls it off and purple pre sticks to white bone, Cross refrains from tasting it, he can save that for later.

He goes to do it again but Epics reaction, or lack thereof, is a concern, "dude whats wrong?" His voice is sickeningly sweet despite their current situation and Epic starts to breath again so he can speak clearly.

"I don't know if I can pull through bruh, I'm sorry," Epic apologized, he didn't move from his spot or dispel his magic, "it feels great! It really does, I just, I'm going to drown in anxiety before pleasure takes hold bruh," his explanation gives Cross an idea, he mulls it over in his head first before speaking.

"Think of it as research," Cross proposed, Epic quirked a metaphorical brow, "take note in your head, this feels, this smells, hell, maybe even this tastes- feel free to distract yourself if it dulls the anxiety dude," Epic doesn't respond right away, "and if you wanna just stop that's also fine, we can go hit the showers and get some ice cream instead dude."

"That's not a bad idea bruh, but I don't think I'll be able to keep note," Epic said, he perched himself at an awkward angle to be closer to eye level with Cross, "of course, we may have to end up conducting research at a further date if results come out looking bare," he says it like its a promise, smirking a bit as he did so, he drops down again and gives a thumbs up.

"Heres hoping," Cross said it so quietly Epic barely caught it, but he gave a weak chuckle when he did, "say how it feels if you want to, might make it easier to remember for future papers."

Cross places his palm against the base of Epics cock, he pauses for a second sliding down a phalanx until he reaches Epics slit instead. Teasingly he lets his thumb rest a hair width away from Epics clit, bring the hand on his thigh down to stroke his cock- Epics hips involuntarily jerk up with the first stroke and Cross smirks in amusement. Epics grip returns to the couch, phalanges nearly digging tears into pleather when Cross presses down on Epics clit, a ragged moan escapes his throat.

"That feels good, akin to fire," Epic managed to choke out as Cross slid a finger in, there's a clench, "and, and that feels right," the formal tone Epic is taking all of a sudden catches Cross off guard, "bruh do it again."

Cross has the guts to give a wink as he swipes the arch between thumb and forefinger across Epics clit, "at your service," he gives a weak tug at Epics cock and there's a spurt of pre.

He fully pulls his hand along the length this time and despite his better judgement goes in for a taste, curiosity kills the cat, but satisfaction brings it back. It tastes how he imagined it to for a guy like Epic, almost sweet, sweet like cookies with an aftertaste of plums, it's all faint though- the look Epic gives him is priceless. But the expression doesn't last for long, not when Epics already talking Cross down from his high and mighty pedestal of knowing what to expect.

"Bruh lemme try some of that," he sounds so confident it throws Cross off guard entirely, still he holds out his hand to Epic who hesitantly sniffs, "that is definitely produced by me," that throws Cross for a loop, but when he catches Epics tongue slipping between his phalanges it makes his stomach flip and his face heat up, "and the flavor, once again, definitely produced by me despite how weak it is," there's a pause, "damn bruh I taste fine."

Cross gives a hum, "yeah no shit dude," he slides a second digit in beside the first and drinks up the reaction Epic gives him, another choked moan.

Cross keeps at it, twisting and thrusting his digits, he has to press into Epics thigh with his side to keep them both in place, he doesn't have enough hands to go around. He drums his fingers along Epics cock between strokes that illicit hips bucking, making it harder for him to pinpoint the spot resting somewhere inside of Epic. Still, no matter how hard it is to find exactly what it is that's making Epic melt, he's in love with the reactions he's getting.

Hips bucking and phalanges grasping it's all a treat, especially the sounds spilling forth. From the small little whimpers and gasps for air to the lustful moans that are torn from his ribs each and every one of them he's earned. And he takes it as a sign that he's doing a good job on holding up his end of the deal. Epics climax hits him hard, he's quivering as he cums and his voice is a shaking decree of Crosses name as violet hues stain his hand. Cross still doesn't stop with Epic cunt, instead he goes even harder, and Epics shaking, he distantly hears the sound of the couches fabric tearing but he doesn't care. This time it's a scream of Crosses name as those same violet hues spill over his hand in copious amounts, he brings both to his mouth to catch a taste.

Epics panting, his soul is racing in his chest, and his eyes are frantically darting back and forth. His bones feel brittle and his soul feels spent, it's amazing and he wants to chase the feeling as it starts to fade and he just feels beat. His ecto doesn't go away yet, instead Cross hesitantly holds his hands out and Epic remembers that he's documenting this.

He heaves a breath before tasting whats on Crosses left hand, "is that fucking cookies? Heh, you are what you eat I guess," Epic said, the taste lingered for a second, he gently took hold of Crosses right hand, the contrast of their shakiness was insane, "and this one tastes more like fruit, but the cookie overtone is insane," he releases Crosses hand, "and to reiterate, damn bruh, I taste fine," Cross gives a bit of a chuckle.

"You wanna go shower down dude?" Cross offered gently, Epic shook his head, shifting his legs around as his magic dispelled, he yanked his pants back up.

"I think I'll collapse if I try to stand bruh," Epic said with a bit of a forced laugh, "I'd take a bath for sure, but once again, I'm shaking like a baby deer."

Cross leans against him, he can feel the thrum of his soul and its rapid, it starts to try and sync up with his own, "you don't need to shower right away then, we can just sit here for a bit."

There's a brief pause of comfortable silence as Epics pupils shrink down to normal again, and his breathing evens out.

"Wanna watch some Iron Chef?" Epic asked, the question caught Cross off guard, but, that's what Epics good at.

"Hell yeah dude," Cross answered with, tossing the remote to Epic who took the sleeve of his jacket to wipe of the purple smudges

He flicks on the TV, "we're so doing that shit again, next time it'll be me on top though," Epic states it so boldly it makes Cross smile.

"Okay, I'm not sure if you can bring me as far as I brought you though," Cross challenged, Epic quirked a brow.

"Please, I'm a scientist, I got my methods, I assure you that within five times I'll have you begging me to stop because you can't take it," Epic challenged back, he held out a hand, "do have a wager bruh?"

Cross gripped Epics hand, "yes, yes we do dude."

#undertale multiverse #epiccross #cross x epic #epic x cross #they make go crazee ur honor #smutfic #smut fanfiction #lemon #writing #fanfic #fanfiction

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gegewrites · 2 years

Text

mr.whites daughter 2- 18 months

There is a major plot fuck up in this chapter and I’m too lazy and unmotivated to fix it, it’s italicized for now.

Jesses pov-

It's been about a month since Mr.white and I cooked for the first time.

To say the least The next few days after the whole...phosphine gas thing didn't end well, first I went and stayed at the "crystal palace" for a few nights after (y/n) left because her dad came in and tried to start shit with me and o wasn't staying there. I soon went back home, krazy was gone and so was Mr.white

Your pov

I haven't been to jesses in a month? But currently I was at a cookout at my parents house and my aunt and uncle were over.

I was sitting by my mom and uncle hank. Dad was telling the story about how him and mom met. She was a waitress, and crossword puzzles, talking about it for my brother.

It was going fine till I noticed my mom start crying.

"Mom?" I put mh hand on her shoulder as my aunt pushed her chair back and came over, kneeling down.

"What's wrong? Skylar what's wrong?" My mom shook her head and let out a sob as she stood up.

"Ask him." She pointed at my dad and she left. I watched her walk back into the house and looked at my dad.

"Walter?" Marie asked,"what is that about?"

"Dad?" I asked and he fidgeted with his napkin before admitting what it was.

"I have cancer." He said and I stopped breathing,"lung cancer."

"Are you serious?" I whispered and I felt my aunts hand on my shoulder,"are you fucking serious?"

"(y/n)." Hank scolded lightly. I looked at my dad, biting the inside of my lip.

"That-that's why you've been coughing like that, huh?" I pointed out and he nodded. My body went into auto pilot and I got up from my seat,"and you didn't think to tell anyone? Not ur wife-"

"Skyler knows." He said.

"When did she find out? Cause obviously it was recent."

"The other day."

"Jesus fuckin Christ." I scoffed.

"(y/n) let's just-" my aunt Marie said and I cut her off.

"Sit down? Talk? I think we're past that to be honest." I laughed and looked at junior who wiped his eyes with his napkin and the he stood up, grabbing his crutches.

"Junior." My dad said and he continued to walk away and go back into the house.

"You know, your children and your wife, wouldn't be acting like this if you had maybe just...I don't know, told us." I shook my head.

"Let's all just...go inside and talk about this?" My aunt suggested.

"I agree." Hank nodded.

"Sure why don't we? If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna comfort my mother and little brother." I pushed my chair in and grabbed my beer and walked to the door, sliding it open and closing it behind me.

We ended up all talking, and halfway through I had to leave. I just had to. If I didn't, I would've punched him. How the hell coukd he keep that from someone? Huh? How?!

Jesses pov-

I went and stayed at parents for a bit, and then ended up getting kicked out because the cleaning lady found my brothers pot and I got blamed for. Earlier I went to mr.whites house and gave him his money and he flipped thinking k was wired or some shit.

This whole...thing. Had me fucked up. I looked in the news paper listings and tried to get a job at the bank. Ended up running into badger, in a dollar bill costume, spinning s sign.

We went to the ally and smoked a joint.

"Think you coukd hook me up with a little crystal man?" He asked.

"Uh, nah i don't do that anymore." I shook my head.

"Why? Man shit was the bomb!"

"I had this partner...it just didn't work well, and sudo is so hard to fine these days..." I tried to brush him off and it didn't work.

"Yo I could hook you up with mad sudo man! I got my channels bro!" He said in a energetic yet quiet voice,"we could partner up!" He looked at his watch,"oh shit, o gotta get back." He waddled away and Pat my shoulder and I followed him and went to my car.

This shit just ain't working. Can't get a normal job or Fuckin anything. I looked back over at Badg and his offer came to my head, I couldn't resist it, so I got out and went to talked to him.

That didn't end well.

Your pov-

I parked in jesses driveway and saw my dad and him standing my the rv.

"Hey." I greeted them as I got out closing the door and walking over.

"Yo." Jesse smiled.

"You actually came, for a second I didn't think you were." My pointed out.

"Ya I came." I smiled lightly, I still didn't forgive him for not telling me about his cancer earlier.

"Listen, we need to cook." My dad said.

"Alright." I nodded.

"Ya, sounds good."

Lucky to say, tye next day we headed out to the boonies. I checking the flame on the boiler when my dad started coughing a bit as he poured the red liquid into it. I stood up as his coughing got worse and he put the glass down and quickly stumbled out of the rv. Coughing hard as he tore his mask off.

"Yo man!" I rushed out of the rv as Jesse got up from his seat and my dad rushed to sit down, Jesse leaned forward,"you have cancer."

"What?" My dad coughed out.

"That red dot,"I walked over lifting my mask up as he spoke,"to target the radiation, it's in your lungs right?"

"Yeah." I said crossing my arms.

"Why did you tell me? I'm your partner man!" Jesses yelled in a soft and disappointment tone. I still wasn't ready to talk or even hear about his cancer, so I pulled my mask down and went back into the RV, letting them talk.

Jesse and I left sometime later to go sell as much as we could before the morning, we had a pound each. He went to the dog house and some places around town and I went to my bar, know a couple of guys there who are always willing to buy crystal, hear them talking to others guys about it, and before I got clean, I use to buy from them.

I ended up walking out of there with 65k, offered to pay a lot more cause it's glass grade they, bought the pound I had.

Went back tye next morning with it split 21k each, Jesse sold two ounces and got 26k, split three was 8.6 k each.

"8 thousand each?" My dad said.

"I only sold two ounces, she sold the whole one." Jesse pointed at me,"so ya, 8 k each."

"How'd you sell the whole pound?" My dad asked.

"I know some distributors." I smiled.

"I don't know them, but I mean, you need to be vouched for and shit, it's not that easy." My dad nodded.

"Then get someone who's knows someone, and have the vouch." My dad shrugged.

Next thing I know, I'm getting a call from skinny Pete that Jesse is the hospital because of Tuco.

The secretary said room 34 and I rushed right toward it, down the hall and to the room.

I pushed the door open and I saw skinny and my dad. Jesse was in the bed, his face bruised to hell from whatever that guy did.

"Oh my fucking god." I whispered as I closed the door.

"Tuco went crazy." Pete said and I nodded.

"I can tell." I didnt blink, or even move. My body felt cold, I was...angry? Scared? I couldn't tell between the two. But one thing I knew...this Tuco was going to regret it.

"Where is Tuco?" My dad asked and took me out of head.

"Outside the side of the bar, corner of Alamo." Tuco said,"gotta ask for him."

"I know where that is." I nodded,"ya, I use to know some guys who went there."

"So you know where it is?" My dad asked.

"Ya." I glanced at him.

"Alright, we need to go to the camper, now." He stood up and grabbed my shoulder.

"Right now? I just got here." I said and he raised his brow and mouthed the word 'mercury'

I didn't go to the RV. He was going to tucos to "talk" and was bring an explosive mercury to trick him and really use to explode him. Here's my thing, I use to be known in the meth scene, my name is known, I helped distribute some for people around. Ive heard about Tuco, I'm not Fuckin around with him. So I went home, for the next few weeks, my dad never called me, was dodging my calls, ao I just stopped trying. Jesse was moved into his RV I guess? I've been taking a lot of shifts at work, and he also told me to not come because he didn't want me to see what he looked like so I respected him and never went over.

I actually didn't hear from them for awhile.

I saw my dad at the baby shower, I bought some clothes and stuff for Holly, but my dad and I...we didn't really talk. He gave me a hello and a hug, and a jiw have you been doing? And normal things, but he didn't even pull me aside or come to my car and talk when I left. I had no clue what they were doing.So I called jesse.

"Yo, wassup?" I heard some talking behind him.

"What are you and my dad doing?" I asked leaning against the back of the couch in my apartment.

"Getting supplies? We're gonna cook in my basement? Did he not tell you?" He spoke slowly and confused.

"No, he hasn't told me anything." I said, taken back at that fact.

"Ya, we gotta make Tuco like 4 pounds a week now Yo."he tone was low, I guess he was out getting the supplies,"He told me he would tell you when we left the wreck yard, I guess he didn't. Said you were busy with something."

"Ya no he didn't." I shook my head.

"We'll we're gonna cook this weekend." I heard him place something into a cart,"gonna bring all this stuff into the basement when I get home. "

"Alright." I nodded.

"Hey um..." I leaned forward and I rested my head on my hand,"I don't...I don't want you involved with Tuco."

"I don't wanna get involved. I've heard about him, he's insane."

"Good, good."

"You wanna come over after?"

"Ya sure." He chuckled,"look I gotta get this supplies so imma call you later, aight?"

"Sounds good." I hung up. I put my phone down on the table and scoffed,"what the fuck?"

A few weeks later...

Jesses pov-

It's been a....eventful few weeks.

Welll...(y/n) was currently sitting in the back seat with Tuco as i pulled up by Mr.whites driveway. I looked back at (y/n) in the rear view mirror and saw here starling blankly our the window to the front door. Mr.white came out shortly after, walking uo to the car and leaning into the window.

"What are you two doing here?" He looked at (y/n) and back at me as I looked into the backseat as tuco sat up and pointed his gun at him.

"Get in." He said,"get.In." Mr.white got in reluctantly and I felt the tip of the gun flick my ear,"drive."

Every second I could I'd look back in the rear view and look at (y/n). Stuck in the black stare, and occasionally I'll find her glancing at Tuco or towards me.

"Real quiet ese." Tuco said to Walter,"what happened to that mouth of yours?"

"Why is (y/n) here?" He asked and I glanced over at him.

"Pretty thing was at jesses house, Ese." I looked kk the mirror and saw the tip of the gun under (y/n) chin,"why not have something pretty to look at for the ride, huh?"

"Don't touch her." I said, as calmly as I could.

"Why? Whatchu gonna do?" I kept silent, I didn't wanna say the wrong thing and have to later be cleaning her blood up,"that's what I thought Puta."

"Take the gun away from her." I said and he pushed the gun harder into her chin dragging it to jaw.

"I don't think I will. Seems to be keeping you two tamed." I heard (y/n) hum out a chuckle as the road changed from asphalt to red dessert dirt.

"Fuck you." She looked over at him, my eyes darting from the road to the rear view mirror, the gun was now under her lip as she faced him,"fuck. You."

"Just tell me when Perra." He let out a laugh and she looked away,"hard to get huh? I like em hard to get, I like the fight."

He was making my blood boil, and I can only imagine how Mr.white felt about it.

"And I like when I can see their dick size through their jeans, seems we like we're both out of luck huh?" She spit snd he whacked her with pistol and I slammed on the break.

"KeeP drivin!" He yelled, I saw blood drop down (y/n)s temple as she blinked rapidly. I picked up the speed, mr.white sharply exhaled and shook his head.

I wanted to kill this motherfucker.

The sun was up and all three of us were sitting on a bench by his wheelchair bound uncle. (y/n) was sitting in between us and she had drives blood running down the side of her face stopping at her jaw.

"I'm gonna Fuckin kill him." (y/n) whispered.

"We're trying to." Mr.white whispered back.

"Alright." Tuco said walking back from the kitchen,"empty your pockets, now!" We all stood up. I dug in my pockets for my phone and my wallet and tossed them in the table. Mr.white pulled multiple things out including his phone, wallet, and medicine. (y/n) tossed her phone and her wallet down.

He picked up mr.whites wallet and looked at his license.

"I thought it name was Heisenbergc Walter hartwell white." Tuco looked at him.

"It's more of a business name." He nodded and Tuco took out two pictures.

"I like working with a family man." He showed us the pictures, it was him, his wife, (y/n), and her little brother,"lots of collateral."

He dropped them down and picked up mine, opening it and shaking it out to find nothing hit a condom.

He laughed out loud and tossed it onto the table.

"That's Fuckin sad." He shook his head.

"Only in there cause I don't have to use one." He looked at (y/n).

"Why is it, Every 10 minutes you seem to get even hotter, Perra?" He asked her grabbing her wallet.

"Because you don't seem like you've gotten pussy since your twenties." (y/n) retorted as he pulled out a dime bag , of what I could only assume is Coke and a NA chip.

"Hmm, you lines huh?" He asked walking around the table and grabbed her, pulling her away from us. I didn't take my eyes if her as he gripped her shirt collar, grabbing the chain she wore around her neck as well. He shook the baggie in front of her and spoke,"why don't you snort one off my Dick?"

"Come back to me when you find it." She spit in his face and he shoved her into the wall.

"Don't you two Fuckin move!" He yelled at us and we didn't. I watched as he walked towards her and pushed her against the wall, his forearm up Against her neck. (y/n) was tough, no she really was, i remember in high school how she's get into fights with all the douchebags at the skatepark who would taunt her for being there with me, skinny, and badger. She never backs down, right now, I was hoping she would.

"You don't scare me asshole." He got really close to her face.

"I bet I could. Only actin tough cause ur daddy's here huh?" He pressed his forearm harder against her neck.

"Which one?" I heard her whisper, I don't think mr.white heard it and I really hope he didn't cause I didn't wanna explain that,"no response? eres un marica."

"I've had enough of you!" He threw her off the wall and onto the floor where she landed on her ass.

"No! No no!" I yelled,"yo look don't, okay? She didn't mean it yo!"

"Tuco, we can do this without the assault." Mr.white said,"just leave her alone."

I could see (y/n) shaking a bit, mainly in her arms, and by her staggered breathing. But she stayed stone cold, matching the energy he was delivering.

"Leave her alone? After she comes to ny house and disrespects me?" He pulled her off the floor and she grabbed his wrist,"let me show you what happens when you disrespect me in my house. You two, sit!"

We did just that as he pushed (y/n) away somewhere into the house.

"Fuck, fuck man!" I rubbed my face with my hands, they were shaking like hell right now,"we gotta do something."

"What did he grab out of her wallet?" He asked me.

"Man I don't-"

"Was that Coke?" He asked.

"And a NA chip." I said,"fuck man, what is he doin with her?"

I heard that door slam and I flinched.

"Yo fuck you!" I heard (y/n) yell.

"He's gonna Fuckin kill her." I bit onto my knuckles.

"No he's not." Mr.white said,"he's stupid but he's smart."

"How can you say that?! That's your daughter man!" I kept my voice low so Tuco couldn't hear.

"If he kills her, he's just gonna men everything worse, that's not his plan, she's not that important." I looked at him like he had three head,"you know what I mean."

It felt like an hour till Tuco brought (y/n) back out. She had a bloody lip. He pushed her onto the bench next to me and she wiped her nose.

"You three, stay right Fuckin there. Don't move." Tuco walked away to the kitchen.

I looked over at (y/n) as she scrunched her nose and Sniffed. (y/n) was sober for a year, and he just ruined that.

"I'm gonna kill him." She said between her teeth,"I'm really gonna Fuckin kill him."

"Not now." Mr.white said,"are you okay?"

"I'm fine." She hissed, her jaw was tense, her eyes had tears in them that she blinked away, I could tell she wanted to break down, but she didn't. I grabbed her hand and held it tightly, her hand was trembling in mine and she leaned on her elbow, resting her chin on her fist.

Your pov-

My nose, my tongue, and my throat were numb. A year I've been sober, I carry that bag in my wallet with every new chip I get to remind myself that it's not that hard, yes it hard but I've came along way...and now my dad knows.

"Eat." Tuco put two plates down on the table as he went and sat another two down. We walked over as he sat the last plate down. I sat at the end of the table by Jesse, and dad sat where Tuco was sitting. Tuco rolled his uncle over and out him next to me at the left end corner of the table. Before he came over my dad our the ricin laced meth into his burrito. Coke made me feel calm but also have energy. Probably why I didn't freak when The old man pressed his bell or when he slammed the plate to the floor.

"What did you do that fooor!!?" Tuco yelled,"old people, you bring them to a nice house in the country, you out food in their bellies, and yet they still treat you like...shit!"

"Can't blame him."

I can't exactly remember what happened after that. I remember Jesse getting pushed up against a pallet wall outside and having a assault rifle pressed against the back of his head, and then Jesse hit him with a rock a shot him, and next thing I know Jesse and I are walking down the desert road and my dad got picked up by some guys in a truck.

"Yo You good?" Jesse asked and I looked at him and nodded,"you sure? Seem pretty spacey."

"I'm fine." I assured him,"I'm-im fine."

"Ya, okay, sure." He nodded.

"I was bound to relapse at some point." I looked to my right into the desert. I felt my arm be grabbed and I was pulled back. Jesse kept a firm grip on my arm.

"Don't. Say that." He said firmly,"you were a year clean, don't say that."

"A year clean with a gram of coke in my wallet." I scoffed.

"How long has that been sitting in there though? Huh? A year right?" He didn't let go of me, he instead stepped closer,"I remember when you texted me, when you called me in a panic because you did too much, I drove you to the hospital. I sat in the waiting room for hours until they said I could go in." He let go of me and poked my chest,"so never say that, because you're not that type of person."

I stood still, paralyzed in my place as Jesse started to walk away, he only for a few steps before he grabbed my hand and started leading me down the road. He got his phone out and called someone.

"Yo badge, think you could do me a solid?" He asked,"(y/n) and I are like 15 minutes from the Sandia firework stand, think you could pick us up?...get in ur car, and start Fuckin driving."

He shoved his phone back in his pocket after he hung up. I followed him aimlessly, he looked back every few minutes until he stop walking.

"Sit down." He said, i opened my mouth to protest,"sit down (y/n)."

I sighed and sat down on the diet road, knowing my blue jeans woukd be stained a tint of orange, he got down on one knee and gently wiped my temple, and down my cheek to my jaw.

"What?" I asked trying to move his hand away but he grabbed my wrist with his Other one and stopped me.

"You're sweating and opening up the gash on ur temple." He wiped my jaw and cheek once more begire dabbing the gash again.

"When the fuck did that happen?" I asked.

"In the car on the way to that assholes place." He said as he held the sleeve to my temple, he grabbed his phone out of his pocket and called badger again,"man hurry yo ass up, (y/n) is bleeding bad right now...I'll explain once you get ur ass to the firework stand." He stood up and put his phone in his pocket,"come on, keep that pressed on it, I'll get something at the stand."

Jesse and badger dropped me off at my place, my car was here.

"Yo clean that shit when you get inside." Jesse leaned over badger,"and drink some fuckin water."

"What are you? My mom?" I walked over and leaned into the drivers side window.

"No, im your concerned boyfriend who just watched you-" he stopped talking and took a breath,"just do what I say, please."

"Okay." I said and badger smiled at me,"can I help you?"

"Nah, we'll see you later." I pushed his head lightly as i for out of the window and walked away.

"Wah-ter!" Jesse yelled.

"Fuck off biatch!" I yelled as badger drove away. I walked up the pathway to the 2 person apartment, and took a right to mine. I grabbed the spare key from under the cactus pot and unlocked the door and went inside. I've been gone for three days, well we all have.

I ran into the hospital and to the desk.

"(y/n) white, my-my father was admitted, my mom and brother are here with him. Skylar and Walter junior." I said and she checked the database

"Level 3, go left of the elevator to B hallway, and he's in room 23." She said, i nodded and rushed away.

I made it the third floor and went left down the hall checking each room number till I reached it. I opened the door and saw my Dad, brother, and mom.

"What happened?" I asked closing the door, getting a hug from my mother,"you found him?"

"The hospital called me." She kissed my cheek and brushed over the bandaid on my temple,"what happened? Your lip is busted."

"I slipped in the kitchen after I mopped. I'm fine, don't worry about me, okay?" I felt my brother head on my shoulder so I turned and hugged him, looking at my dad.

"Did-do you get ur head che-checked out?" Junior asked.

"One of my coworkers did a simple concussion test, I'm fine, don't worry." I smiled as junior let me go, I walked over and gave dad a hug, he Pat my back and kissed my cheek,"how you feelin?"

"Im feeling better, I just got...confused." He smiled and gave my hand a squeeze, i raised my brow at him a bit and he winked at me,"I'm okay, don't worry."

I nodded and looked over at my mom who was sat in one of the chairs and my phone rang, I actually grabbed my phone before I left tucos, atleast I remembered that. I checked the number.

"I'll be right back." I flipped my phone opened and open and closed the door and spoke,"hey."

"Yo." Jesse said,"how you feelin?"

"I'm fine." I said,"my dads in the hospital."

"Shit,why?" He asked.

"Cause he's been, quote unquote missing for three days." I said,"apparently he doesn't remember much."

"Damn." He hissed,"guess what?"

"What?"

"I said to guess, so you have to guess."

"You want me to come over?" I heard him chuckle.

"No, well yes, but no. The Fuckin cops were at my house today, and then I got pulled in for questioning by some bald ass DEA agent, Askin me where I've been for three day, then he brought up you and Mr.white, Askin me if I knew where you guys were, told him I had no clue." My brows furrowed,"apparently he knows about us, well highschool us."

"Hank Schrader?" I asked.

"Ya that's his name."

"That's my uncle." I nodded,"Fuckin A." I rubbed my face and heard the room door open behind me,"what are you doin now?"

"Just got done with badgers cousin who's stowing the RV away." He said and I nodded.

"Alright."

"I'm also out of 80 grand because your dickhead uncle found the duffel in my Ride. So the DEA Fuckin took it." He groaned.

"Are you serious?"

"As a Fuckin heart attack (y/n)!"

"(Y-(y/n)?" I heard my brother speak.

"Shit." I groaned,,"we'll figure out something okay? I-I gotta go."

"Aight, fine, whatever." He groaned,"I love you."

"Love you too, I'll talk to you later." I hung up and turned around mad faced my brother.

"I love you?" He smiled.

"My boyfriend, Shh." I put my index over my lips and he laughed,"wanna go and get a snack?"

"Ya sure." He nodded and we walked down the hallway,"I-I haven't seen you in a-awhile."

"I've been busy with work." I apologized.

"We're were looking for you-you and dad for the last few d-days." I nodded.

"I got ur calls." I lied,"I listened to the voicemails, I just got super busy helping my boyfriend and taking extra shifts."

"Oh-oh okay." He stopped when we got to a vending machine. I grabbed my wallet out and handed him some cash as my phone rang again. I answered it and bent down to grab the chips he got from the opening.

"Hey uncle hank." I smiled.

"Hey kiddo, how you uh, you been?" He asked.

"I'm good, currently at the hospital, we got Walter back." I shook my hand at junior, I gave him a five and let him keep the change, I didn't need it.

"We were worried about you kid." I walked back towards the room with junior.

"Ya I've told, I got super busy with work and personal things. I read all the voicemails, but you're not allowed to make calls in the office." I laughed.

"Ya ya don't worry about it. Look, I hate to bring this up but You're ex-boyfriends car was found at a cartel members house, wondering if you knew anything by chance?" I felt my body go cold.

"Who Jesse?" I asked.

"Ya pinkman."

"I haven't talked to that bitch since I left for college. So no, I know nothing. Sorry." I heard him click his tongue.

"It's good, it's good. I'll talk to you soon alright?"

"Alright, talk to you soon." With that I hung up and opened the door for junior,"hey look, I've gotta go. I'm helping Andy with some papers and such in the morning."

"Alright." My mom came over and gave me a right hug, I hugged her back and he stayed like this for a few seconds,"I'll see you later then."

"Ya, cmere kid." I gave junior a side hug and kissed the top of his head and then gave dad a hug.

"Stay safe." He said.

"You too old man."

Jesses pov-

A few weeks later-

I blew the smoke out of my mouth as I watched (y/n) car pull up to the RV sight. Last time we cooked was a few weeks ago, Jane invited me to a art museum in Santa Fe and instead I came here because mr.white said we needed to cook from todays till Tuesday because the methlamine was going to spoil

"You're late." Walter said as she got out.

"Ya ya I know." She locked the car, I coukdnt see the Bruise on her bottom lip and the ot bruise surrounding the gash on her temple. Her lip was healed but thst gash seemed like it was refusing to, still looked only a few days old. she walked towards me and stole the almost dead cigarette out of my hand.

"Since when have you smoked?" Mr.white asked her.

"Since I started college." She blew out and I caught glimpse of her pink toned eyes,"are we cooking or what?"

"Yo We better be cause I just had to buy an apartment because my greedy ass parents kicked me out." I said as she dropped the cig and stomped it out.

"The fuck?" She said and I nodded,"damn."

"Fuckin assholes." I groaned.

"If you wanna cook, then let's get in and start."

Mr.white and I ended up getting into a argument about who's job was whose. I sell, he and (y/n) cook, that was the agreement and the he just, look the man gets in my damn nerves. Then he said some shit about me and (y/n), she wasn't in the RV when he said it and it was honestly fuckin disrespectful. Some shit about how she's only with me because she feels sorry for me, and how I shouldn't even let her near me because I'll just corrupt her. (y/n) and I haven't really spoken since I moved.

Oh and the RV died, and the generator blew up, so we got stranded here for a few days. Oh and (y/n) car was to hot to run so the overheating practically killed her engine, she was able to get it started though.

The last time I saw (y/n) was when I was getting my crew together, taht was after Tuco, when we needed to expand and shit...

Badger, skinny pete, and combo were all in my apartment, I was telling them about our new gig, about how we gotta sell as much as we can tomorrow.

"Badger," I caught his attention,"what is this?"

"Uh..a business opportunity." I nodded and there was a knock in the door.

"Bitches already pulling up man!" Skinny Pete exclaimed as I unlocked and opened the door, it was (y/n).

"Your third." She handed me a brown paper Bag,"20 thousand, all there."

"Yo how much?!" Badger asked.

"None of your damn business Badg." (y/n) smiled.

"Wanna come in?" I asked.

"I-I can't." That when I noticed her eyes were bloodshot,"I really should just get home." I closed the door behind me.

"Whats wrong?"

"Nothing." She shook her head.

"So like your eyes are just bloodshot from nothing?" She looked away towards her car.

"Look you for your third, I gotta go." She didn't wanna talk.

"Tell me what's up." I pressed,"come on."

"It's nothing, really Jess." She denied, I looked at her car, I saw a CD on the Dash, covered in dust.

"(y/n)."

"I have to go."

"Ur high." I looked at her,"you're fuckin high."

"Not like ur not all the time." She shrugged it off.

"How much?" She looked away so I grabbed her shoulder,"how much?"

"Half a teenth." She whispered and my hand dropped from her shoulder.

"Are you fuckin serious?" I was more confused then mad, I mean I was mad, (y/n)s had her problems and shit and now she's just...I don't know givin up?

"I'm not gonna stand here and he berated by Jesse fuckin pinkman for smoking some okay?" She walked away.

"What's the spose' to mean?!" I yelled as she for in her car. I looked at the bag of cash and shook my head as she drove away and went inside,"20 grand already."

#jesse pinkman #jesse pinkman x reader #Jesse pinkman smut #breaking bad #breaking bad smut #breaking bad fanfiction

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emerals · 8 months

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the lads but it’s cards against humanity

some of these are funny most aren’t lmao

prompts are bolded!!

OZZY - - Seeing my father cry; kid-tested, mother-approved. - Step 1: A sorry excuse for a father. Step 2: Vehicular manslaughter. Step 3: Profit. - What's my secret power? Fucking all my dad's friends. - What's that smell? Poor life choices.

JUNIPER - - Excuse me, straight man, but all the different kinds of lesbians isn't for you, STRAIGHT MAN. - Mr. and Mrs. Diaz, we called you because we're concerned about Cynthia. Are you aware that your daughter is throwing grapes at a man until he loses touch with reality? - Girls. High five, bro. - A romantic candlelit dinner would be incomplete without getting serial killed.

XIMENA - - I never truly understood hot people until I encountered your mom. - But before I kill you, Mr. Bond, I must show you vigorous jazz hands. - That's right, I killed heteronormativity. How, you ask? Bees? - For my next trick, I will pull science out of a Bop It.

WHITTANY - - I drink to forget being rich. - Uh, hey guys, I know this was my idea, but I'm having serious doubts about breaking into song and dance. - I got 99 problems but crumbs all over the god damn carpet ain't one. - Hey guys, welcome to Chili's! Would you like to start the night off right with kissing grandma on the forehead and turning off her life support?

ASH - - Arby's We Have completely unwarranted confidence. - When I am President, I will create the Department of a bitch slap. - Hey Reddit! I'm judging everyone. Ask me anything. - I'm LeBron James, and when I'm not slamming dunks, I love two Xanax and a bottle of wine.

VIVIAN - - YAAAAAAS! You are serving me daddy issues realness! - Dude, do not go in that bathroom. There's men in there. - What's the best metaphor for our political system? 30 shirtless bears emerging from the fog. - 50% of all marriages end in listening to her problems without trying to solve them.

EVERETT - - In the new Disney Channel Original Movie, Hannah Montana struggles with the patriarchy for the first time. - What are my parents hiding from me? Saying "I love you". - As the mom of five rambunctious boys, I'm no stranger to a little boy who won't shut the fuck up about dinosaurs. - If you can't love yourself, how the hell you gonna love committing treason?

KIWI - - Mamma Mia. Here I go again. My! My! How can I resist giggling like an anime girl? - Kids, I don't need drugs to get high. I'm high on sunshine an rainbows. - TSA guidelines now prohibits wizard music on airplanes. - My fellow Americans: Before this decade we will have Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson on the moon!

DEAN - - I get by with a little help from self-loathing. - I'm no doctor, but I'm pretty sure what you're suffering from is called "being fucking pathetic". - Your dreams are one click away! Learn more at Hope.com. - What's the most emo? A lifetime of sadness.

NIX - - Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's menstrual rage. - The class field trip was completely ruined by whatever straight people do for fun. - It's a pity that kids these days are all getting involved with unfathomable stupidity. - Old MacDonald had dark and mysterious forces beyond our control. E-I-E-I-O.

HUNTER - - Howdy neighbor! I couldn't help but notice you struggling with getting into a pretty bad car accident. Need a hand? - Why can't I sleep at night? Dead parents. - When I was tripping on acid, BATMAN! turned into therapy. - I'm Tony Robbins, and over the next sixty minutes I'm going to teach you how to harness the power of the Kool-Aid Man!

DOTTIE - - What's there a ton of in heaven? Some god damn peace and quiet. - What's a girl's best friend? Solving problems with violence. - I'm going on a cleanse this week. Nothing but kale juice and silence. - IF you like sipping kombucha like a smug piece of shit, YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK.

ADEN - - Check me out, yo! I call this dance move "establishing dominance." - White people like drinking gasoline to see what it tastes like. - Just saw this upsetting video! Please retweet!! #stopmyinnerdemons - Why do I hurt all over? A mistake.

SYLVIA - - Designers! For this week's challenge, you must make a dress designed for telling Heather she can't pull off that top. - Daddy, why is mommy crying? Toxic masculinity. - And the Academy Award for complaining goes to the careless cunt who left a water ring on my credenza. - Why am I sticky? Soup that is too hot.

LOUIE - - Instead of coal, Santa now gives the bad children PTSD. - We're here! We're doing crimes! Get used to it! - Today on Maury: "Help! My son is being a motherfucking sorcerer!" - Premiering tonight: NBC's new heartfelt family drama, This Is an old guy who's almost dead.

MARSHALL - - I'm sorry Professor, but I couldn't complete my homework because of some guy. - What never fails to liven up the party? Being on fire. - Well if you'll excuse me, gentlemen, I have a date with kayaking with my sluts. - Here is the church. Here is the steeple. Open the doors and there is a messy bitch who lives for drama.

#nix rodentia #aden fang #dean rodentia #ash fliwig #dottie angels #everett mustelidante #hunter gundog #juniper passerine #kiwi purrborne #marshall snowshoe #ozzy swan #ximena avianta #louie duck #whittany lop #sylvia honeyberg #vivian pyroar #cards against humanity

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wisefoxluminary · 10 months

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Just a Good Old Boys

Synopsis | Joel and Tommy have a boys night out at the bar. Title is inspired by Good Ol' Boys (Dukes of Hazzard theme) by Waylon Jennings. Set pre-outbreak.

Warnings: fluff, karaoke, strong language, Tommy being a little shit, Joel being a respectable father, bad jokes, brothers bonding.

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This ficlit is just a short exploration of Joel and Tommy's relationship and their brotherly bond, with a little bit of fluff and karaoke. The karaoke scene was heavily inspired by this scene from Supernatural. Their voices here just reminded me so much of Joel and Tommy. Just a good old boys, never meaning no harm lol. I had originally posted this awhile back as part of my Joel centric one shots on ao3 titled My History Will Be the Death of Me.

---

The carpeting was really starting to become tedious as Joel and Tommy had worked their asses off to get paid. They had signed up for this job to support one another, to make ends meet for Sarah and the family they'd built. Joel loved his little brother more than anything and would stand by his side at any fault or turn. Tommy had been a soldier, serving his division during the Gulf War. When he left the military, he had no one to turn to but Joel. This job was the only thing that kept his sanity intact. He wanted to keep an eye on him, as his older brother, he wanted to take full responsibility in helping him adjust back to society. Since then, Tommy had helped him raise Sarah, becoming an integral part of their family. He regularly drove her to school or to soccer practice. Though Joel had to berate him whenever he smoked around Sarah. He wasn't a fan of smoking and was trying to protect his daughter's wellbeing.

After work, Tommy had organised a boys night out for him and Joel to slack off after all the work they'd endured. He was planning to drag him along to a bar, to pick up some steam. Joel felt it was the best for both of them, to let off steam and have fun for once. It felt like it would give Tommy the night he needed after all of the responsibility he needed to carry. He thought it was the best for the both of them. A brotherly bonding session if you will. Joel left Sarah with the Adlers and set off to the bar where Tommy was waiting. When he arrived, he noticed the bar was quite busy for the night. A place where the drunks waste away or partygoers find the thrill. Joel wasn't all too crazy about bars, he had no reason to waste his sorrows on a drink. He tried to be a good example to Sarah, so all of this wasn't his thing. He saw Tommy sitting at one of the dinner tables, waving for him to come over. Joel exhaled sharply, preparing himself for a wild night. He helped himself to a seat as Tommy smiled at him energetically, glad he'd make it. "Hey Joel, I knew you wouldn't resist a night out with your little brother!" Tommy muttered as he pulled Joel into a bear hug, trying to smile as the two sat at their table.

"So are you holding up okay?" Tommy asked, a proud grin on his face. Joel sat there, arms folded. He clearly needed time to adjust to this bar. "Yeah, yeah...I'm great. I never knew a night in the bar would be so crowded. Not on a winding night like this. I expected Austin, Texas to feel less nocturnal" Joel joked as Tommy laughed heartily at his brother's words. "I don't know where you get this sense of humour, man. It's probably being too much of a family man" Tommy snarled back, welcomed to warm laughter from his older brother. "Hey, you seriously think I'm gonna grow a dad bod by the time I turn 32. I've got a long life ahead of me....and I'm sure Sarah ain't gonna stand for my dad jokes" Joel joked. "Don't tell me you're pulling out dad jokes. There full of shit" Tommy admitted, embarrassed. "Maybe....she thinks I'm unfunny. Like I'm pulling jokes out my ass. I ain't no comedian. She's spending time with the Adlers, so maybe she'll learn something" Joel joked as the two brothers laughed off his words. Joel had no doubt it would be a fun night.

The brothers had ordered drinks from the bar as they joked around and spent the most time together. Joel realised that they never got the time to breath during work to be brothers, to enjoy life as it was. After a few sips of their beer, Tommy turned to Joel, a solution in mind. "Hey, I've gotta a plan if you wanna get out of work early with a inch of your life. I think we should pressuade the big leagues to give us extra pay. It could support Sarah and your rent greatly...but we'll have to take up on nightshifts if you want it" Tommy explained as Joel's face went stern, conflicted about this. "Tommy....you know I don't do nightshifts. I get the pay I need and that's for supporting Sarah" Joel muttered as he took a sip of his beer, Tommy trying to reassure him. "I know it's extra hours and it's not your thing...but imagine the money you'll bring home for Sarah. So whatta say?" Tommy asked as Joel took time to think about. He knew Tommy's words were true and that this extra pay they'll receive will support them greatly. "A deal's a deal, Tommy. You get us the extra pay. We'll get the income" Joel muttered as Tommy shook his hand. "Looks like a deal" Tommy chuckled as the two brothers were even. They were gonna get the pay they deserved, Joel just knew it.

Tommy's eyes were eventually caught on the empty karaoke stand, decorated like a cowboy rodeo, with the model of a horse taking up the room. "Karaoke's available, wanna give it a shot?" Tommy asked as Joel sat there in embarrassment, shaking his head as he tried to hold in his laughter. "No, you go on ahead. Make a fool of yourself Tommy!" Joel chuckled as Tommy went to tinker with the karaoke machine, picking up an attached microphone as he grinned at Joel lively. "Come on older brother, are you gonna be a country singer or a law abiding citizen? Welcome to the best fucking night of your life!!" Tommy bellowed, almost drunk as Joel wasn't looking forward to this moment. Karaoke was something he hated and dreaded to stay clear from. Seeing his brother relish in it was enough to make him want to shut his mind off. He braced himself for this train wreck. There is no way he is going to embarrass himself in front of the entire bar and sing. He couldn't do that. He sat there as Tommy began to sing.

Just a good old boys

Never meanin' no harm

Beats all you never saw

Been in trouble with the law since the day they was born

Joel watched in disbelief, hand over his face to hide his growing embarrassment. He had a jolt of nostalgia in his mind. He used to watch Dukes of Hazzard with Tommy when they were kids, so it was a pleasant suprise to see him sing the theme song. Tommy sarcastically winked at him, trying to encourage his brother to share the stage with him. Joel reluctantly shuffled to the stage, trying to smile his awkwardness away. Tommy was aware of Joel's past dreams of becoming a singer and was trying to exploit through this karaoke. The microphone screeched in his hands like it hated his guts. Joel hated being in the spotlight so he had no choice but to play along.

Straightening the curves

Flattenin' the hills

Someday the mountain might get 'em, but the law never will

Joel's voice was smoky and powerful, garnering a crowd of people. The two brothers traded a smile, beginning to sing their hearts out.

Makin' their way the only way they know how

That's just a little bit more than the law will allow

Makin' their way the only way they know how (yeah)

That's just a little bit more than the law will allow

The crowd began to gather, cheering on the brothers as they sang karaoke like they owned the stage. Joel would have ran head over heels off the stage by now, but he had his brother at his side so it didn't make him anymore fearful. Tommy and Joel's voice interwined to sing the next verse.

I'm a good old boy

You know my mama loves me

But she don't understand

They keep a-showing my hands and not my face on TV, haha

Makin' their way the only way they know how

That's just a little bit more than the law will allow...

The Miller brothers concluded their duet as they were welcomed to applause from those who attended the bar. Joel forced himself to wave to the crowd, smiling joyfully. He was glad to have shared this moment with Tommy, even if it was just for one night. From now on, there were going to become law abiding citizens and do to what needed to be done for their family. This was probably the only fun night they'll have together, but Joel don't care. Having his brother at his side was enough to keep him happy...

#the last of us #joel miller #tommy miller #sarah miller #joel and tommy #joel and sarah #short ficlet #one shot #pure fluff #karaoke #pre outbreak!joel #brothers being brothers #inspired by supernatural #posted on ao3 #the last of us fanfiction #this is how I headcanon their singing voices #Youtube

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urutaguja · 1 year

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Boy what you can do is collect any butter clearly and utterly to be bothered if you're at oliver again back to drawn murphy you out of the wheat scratch you are smart and intelligent and i expect to be smart intelligentIn adult you know i'd like it you'll be one you are 1 thought using the brain cells guy gave you start it all over

Second of all i didn't ask a peanut gallery or a basket case we stayed in your own behind me background blow it blushing at blow shit third pretty commentary pulse of hotter and bless me yourMy initial original opinion stands in my initial original opinion will continue to stand now along after gone it's a receives overturns and overall yours mine is the dominant one yours is resistible one close that

Third on the list you cannot be doing that you are having to seize doing what you doing immediately no kisses if sam's butt sir accepts about it you will see is doing it when you are doing immediatelyNo are blood moposts no postmaposts no reposement hosts no being near my internet visited earnimbler and no follow me or bullshit on the contraryYour if you wanted to tea doing what you doing you gonna have to adhere self do some self terms and get issues eye of self that are of he at all times no excuses if sand's budser exceptions about itYou are all in or all out or anything black or white there is no shades great here no she weariness no being bothered if like at one moment and not being bothered if you look at influence choose a science stick with it

Last of all I have an absolute 0 tolerance policy for teenagers like you games and I mean that therefore you won't do with me you are all in or allGood, earns great, and dad, earns bad, what to go as your outcomes around what comes around goes around there far eagerly wage your plot

Bro, what is wrong with you? Are you high? Or are you trying to say something that should be viewed by someone? What is your target? What is your reasoning to even like my art and then send me this weird ass message and replies?

Listen, I am not even sure if you are also having a damn stroke, go check yourself to a doctor.

For one, I am not even a full on teen? I am literally an adult on his 20s who has Autism Spectrum Disorder, PTSD, Anxiety Stress Disorder and your message here ain't it, pal.

Go check yourself better than I can, then. Since you wanna make it a competition for better health and shit.

Did I ask for this whole ass psychology paragraph of yours? No, but I was expecting you to answer like a normal person, not a wannabe doctorate of psychology and analyzing everything that many have no will to do.

Idk what you want, idk what you look for, but here you are not getting no idiocy of a teen who wants to post p*rn illegally.

Again, go to a doctor or call 911 or whatever your country's emergemcy line is cuz, I got myself a fucking stroke reading you shit man. Fix your grammar better for another -probably wasteful, timetaking paragraph to give and no one, much less I, will fight you for whatever reason you are trying to worthlessly point out.

Leave the narcotics, the psychidelics and shit cuz you made me hate reading too.

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the-slasher-madame · 2 years

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Ok I’m sorry If I’m annoying you, I have a horrible memory and I don’t know if I’ve been like sending a lot of messages today but I have to say this. My mind stops functioning the moment I see a hot guy. Like I was scrolling on pinterest, minding my business when that damn picture of Bo holding Carly’s jaw and blowing on her lips showed up and I just like paused and sat looking at my wall for a good few minutes. Now this happened a few years ago but when I was watching this movie with characters I don’t want to admit to liking with a friend and I like go so uncomfortable when these characters came on screen. Like bro idk what about hot men does this to me but I just can’t handle myself around them

pssssss there's the squirt bottle 💦Y'all don't make me get on phone calls AND y'all drool over slashers with me, you physically can not annoy me

Same Ziggy, same. I see these men pop up on my social medias and it's game over. I was on call with my closest friend earlier and we were playing DBD and gotdamn, I got killed and started reading some...fanfiction... and I was so distracted lol. It's always a struggle to be quiet when I'm reading fanfiction around my family (this week at the beach was...trying in some parts).

Hell it extends to IRL people too, I will start blurting weird shit. I don't see a lot of men that I find attractive, because they all look like they don't wash their asses because they think it's 'gay'. But damn, pretty women? I will give like a compliment and stare because otherwise I will start saying weird shit. But god, men are so pretty. I can't choose, and I won't choose. All tiddies are equal in my eyes. Ghkasdfhksjhfds this whole ask has me grinning like an idiot, thinking of how pretty men are

(Also yea, watching Bo do that gets me feeling a type of way. I've always been like the local weirdo, so I was less resistant to the slasher fuckerism coming to infect my body. It was kinda weird though, weird feeling like that about anyone at all. But hell I ain't complainin, especially when it's these men. I will die on the hill that Vincent is the sweetest man possible and that very few men could treat me better.)

#men #pretty men #pretty slasher men #slashers #slasher fucker

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rejectedbad · 7 months

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Rejected Bad: Puddle

The following is a rejected script from an early season of Breaking Bad.

INT. JESSE'S RV - DAY

Jesse, Skinny Pete, and Badger walk down the street in Albuquerque, New Mexico. They come across a large puddle, staring at it in fear and awe.

JESSE: (eyes wide): Yo, that thing is massive! It's like a damn portal to hell or somethin', man!

SKINNY PETE: (nervously scratching his head) Dude, what if something comes out? Like, I ain't tryin' to deal with demons and whatnot today.

BADGER: (holding a bag of cheesy puffs) Hey, guys, you think the portal has some, like, cosmic Cheetos? I'd brave it for that, maybe.

Jesse, Skinny Pete, and Badger stare at one another, clearly paralyzed by irrational fear. Just then, a weary Walter White cruises by in his RV.

WALTER: (irritated) Oh, for the love of... Get in, you imbeciles!

INT. JESSE'S RV - CONTINUOUS

Jesse, Skinny Pete, and Badger scramble into the RV, relieved to escape the horrors of the possibly impending demonic invasion.

JESSE: (thankful) Mr. White to the rescue!

INT. JESSE'S RV - MOMENTS LATER

Inside the RV, the three men slump down on the worn-out couches, finally calming their nerves.

WALTER: (glares at them) What in the hell were you three doing, scared shit by a puddle?

SKINNY PETE: (defensive) Bro, it's like a supernatural puddle or somethin'. No way are we messin' with that portal stuff, especially to Hell, man!

BADGER: (nods adamantly) Yeah, you know, demons and fire and eternal damnation? Not my thing, dude.

JESSE: (snickers) I mean, there ain't no way you'd go through that puddle either, right?

Walter raises an eyebrow, contemplating his response for a moment before sighing.

WALTER: (resigned) Oh, I've dealt with far worse than just a puddle, believe me. But fine, I'll humour you all.

Walter starts the engine, getting ready to navigate around the fearsome portal to hell.

JESSE: (smiling) Yo, Mr. White, what would you do if you really found a portal to Hell?

Walter smirks, his confidence returning.

WALTER: (make-believe sinister tone) I'd cook the purest blue meth Hell has ever seen. Demons and the Devil couldn't resist the taste.

They all laugh, the tension dissipating as the RV drives off into the distance, leaving the "portal" behind, just a regular puddle now.

FADE OUT.

#breaking bad #rejected bad #jesse pinkman #walter white #badger #skinny pete #puddle

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tabsterfm · 1 year

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So, since I have been getting back into the Pokemon TCG and just Pokemon in general now that a new game is out, I wondered to myself "what would be the most "me" team I could do within certain limitations?" And so, I did just that!

As you can see above, each 'mon has a title under it which signify why it is important to be in my party. To explain them in brief:

-The Bro For Life: The "starter" Pokemon on the lot that I could NEVER do without -The Surfer: A 'mon that is used as means of ocean travel. Plus I EXTREMELY love marine creatures- I think my favorite typing in Pokemon has to be water because of that -The Flyer: A 'mon that is used as means of air travel -The Avian: The bird of the group. I fucking love me a good bird, flying or not -The Insect/Arachnid: I also love me some bugs and spiders -The Fossil: I also love me some ancient shit -The Dragon: Love me dragons -The Magician: I absolutely love everything about magic, so having a 'mon I can have some magic fun with would be great! -The Singer and The Dancer: While I am shy about it, I love doing both, so having 'mons I can do this with would also be great (addmitively these were added last minute when I made certain connections about what 'mons I've picked)

As you can see, that is way more than just 6 titles, so some 'mons have more than one- genius, I know.

Anyways, about time I talked about why I picked who I picked, yeah?

Galarian Slowbro: Ever since I played Heartgold as my first ever Pokemon game and went through the Slowpoke Well, the Slowpoke line instantly won my heart and it doesn't seem like they're ever letting go anytime soon.

I don't know if anything in my childhood subconsciously influenced Slowbro specifically being my favorite of the two evolutions, but it all worked out in the end because it gets a lot of good shit, mainly talking about the mega and the Galarian form.

Now, one might ask "why the Galarian version specifically? Are you a Megaman fan or something?" Well, yes, but that doesn't have anything to do with it. The way I see it, if Pokemon were real and the events of this timeline still happened (mainly America splitting from Britain), I feel like I would more than likely have a Galarian Slowpoke than a normal one if that makes sense. Besides that, there is more to love. I love that it is purple, one of my favorite colors, and I love that it is associated with spices. I am sad that we live in the timeline where only normal Slowbro got a Mega evolution, but I have the perfect idea for my own Mega Galarian Slowbro.

Lapras: As I mentioned before, I am a SUCKER for marine creatures. I am even more of a sucker for Plesiosaurs in particular. They are some of my favorite sea AND ancient creatures of all time- fuck, Plesiomon is my favorite Digimon, after all. I also really love its singing aspect to it- I love the idea of humming a little tune with it as we sailed the seven seas together. I will forever be sad that Lapras got a gigantamax instead of a mega (can you tell what my favorite gimmick was?), but ooooh weeeell.

Delphox: When I was making this list, I put a straight BAN on starters from making any sort of appearance- otherwise it woulda just been every bird starter, Feraligatr, and Torterra or something like that. Here's the thing, though: to my knowledge, there just AIN'T a magic rep out there like Delphox: the design making it look like it's wearing a magic robe, the fact that it uses a literal WAND, LIKE, HELLO??? It is just so me-core that I just, could no resist.

Oricorio: Good lord the Alolan region had some absolute bangers, and these birds are one of them. I just LOVE the idea of a bird 'mon having it's theme be around dancing, something a lot of them do to find a mate. Not only that, but I love that they come in many different flavors of dance and the fact that they can form-change based on what pollen they eat from, something that would encourage me to plant specific plants in a garden or something like that. Another thing I like is that they are small lil buggers, like a cockatoo or a pigeon, so it would be more "realistic" to have them around as a house pet/companion as opposed to those really massive, badass birds that would need their own space to thrive in. Like, I could build a little stage for my Oricorio out of cardboard or something and have them peform on it for fun, and, with Lapras on the team, have her sing for the Oricorio to dance to! A perfect pairing, really.

Araquanid: Yet another Alolan banger! I love me bugs and spiders, as I mentioned above. What I also love is when they are IN THE FUCKING WATEEEERRRRR YEAH BAYBEEEEE!!! Listen, even if Araquanid wasn't a water spider, it would still probably be my favorite spider 'mon next to Galvantula due to how badass it looks, but the aquatic elements of it IS why it's my favorite spider 'mon as of now. Like, I fucking love the idea of my Araquanid hitching a ride under my lapras as we go on some treasure hunt or something, like that idea just fucking rocks.

Admittedly, I REALLY wanted to give this slot to Volcarona because holy fuck is that one amazing design, but I already had two other fire types (counting Oricorio's ) already, and the only type I'd wanna have more than three of is either water or flying. You're still near and dear to my heart, Volcarona, but this spider beat you out by a hair.

Dragapult: Holy. Fucking. Shit. Never in my LIFE would I have EVER expected a 'mon to ever surpass Kommo-o or Garchomp. Everything about this 'mon is fucking amazing- for starters, it is based on an extinct group of amphibians with a unique sort of skull- you already know how I feel about those sorts of creatures. Thee COOLEST part about this design is that, due to the amphibians' tail bones never being found, the tail of Dragapult is transparent. Like, holy fuck!!! I also just love it's stealth-bomber design motif and how the holes on it's head is a two-way reference: one to just simple missile-launchers on planes and one to how certain amphibians have holes in them where they keep their young. I can go on and on about the little details that I love, but I think I've said enough

And that's why I love the 'mons I have strapped into my team! Hopefully y'all enjoyed me rambling on for THAT LONG about something I like- it feels really nice to be able to do something like this. Until next time!

P.S. I just realized that my Pokemon team could be sorted by color and almost make a perfect rainbow, so I've decided to call my crew "The Rainbow Line" based on Ressha Sentai ToQger because I love trains and traveling in general and two of my 'mons help with traveling. I guess if I were a champion or a gym leader with no type theming, this would be the order I use my mons, which is perfect since it means my ace will always be the last one I use as a final horah to my party. I love when things just work out like that.

#tabster says #pokemon #galarian slowbro #lapras #delphox #oricorio #araquanid #dragapult #team-building is so much fun y'all #can't wait to do this for digimon and monster rancher lmao

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fantasmagoriam · 3 years

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Some people on here really act like cd//pr is singlehandedly fighting against homophobia in poland just because they have some queer characters in their game huh

#I wasnt supposed to make a post about this but the more I think about it the more angry I get so here we goooooooo #don't get me wrong I don't mind giving them credit where credits due #they really did quite well with writing their queer characters #and thank gods didn't make 'being gay' their only personality trait #but let's be real they really HAD TO include queer rep if they want to be taken serously as an international company #because fortunately the rest of the world isn't such a shit show when it comes to lgbtq+ rights #calling it 'resistance against real life homophobia and transphobia' is just laughable #they ain't resisting shit bro #it's not like polish government would harm them in any way because they put queer peope in their games #and as far as I know the peak of their 'pro lgbt activism' was changing the icon on their fb profile to a rainbow one #so really #please #lets just not try to look for corporate support of queer rights wher it isnt there #there really isn't anything to praise them for on that field #and before someone recognizes which post I'm refering to and comes at me #I do agree with the main point it makes #but the lasy part just doesn't sit right with me #[white noise]

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hearteyes-for-killmonger · 4 years

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Part 6

Never had Erik thought he'd be in a room with four non-related bad females watching tv and eating fried chicken.. fully clothed.. but here he was choking down biscuits with jug tea and enjoying himself.

"Y'all should come to the party we puttin on Saturday it's finna be lit. People gone get fucked up, watch."

"We heard," Ashleigh scoffed. "Just ghetto.... I'll be there," she saluted with two fingers.

"Yeah, I'm going," a voice yelled from the bathroom.

"So Erik. What made you pledge with the Ques," Tania asked while painting her own toenails blue. He looked back at the tv. They'd just finished an entertaining group discussion about men vs. women: Who cheats more. Erik said women and they said Ques. He had to defend the honor of the bruhs.

"It was the only real decision. Purple and gold till I die."

"Thot till you die," Ashleigh added. He knew each of their names now having deemed them all as legit. His lip twisted at the comment, knowing they were right but not wanting them to BE right.

"Black men don't cheat," he said soberly, laughing in his head as they grunted and tuh'd their disagreement. He had to rep for the fellas. Holding to his position, he playfully argued with them just for them to dismiss his bullshit.

"Aight so Brit..," he smiled making direct eye contact. He wanted her to hold it with him so he could flirt with her some more. "Why Delta?"

"Because I'm an intelligent, illustrious sista and my torch will forever burn," she fired without thought. Her stare never faultered as he eye-fucked her openly. He rubbed his beard with a look that said 'not bad'.

"Also. My mother was a Delta..," she added and his eyes went to her robe hiding the sleeve tattoo on her arm dedicated to her mother's memory. Charmayne. He had the tattoo memorized. "I would've gotten her endorsement but.. you know..." she sighed, shoulders raising. "What made you a poodle," she asked Tania, quick to change the subject. Tania moved her own braids off her shoulder.

"Honestly?" Her face went serious and everyone in the room quieted to hear. "Well, I don't talk about this a lot because it's really personal... but.."

Erik hung on waiting for the spill.

"But," she sighed pausing with her polish. "I... honestly... I just liked the colors..."

"GIRL!" Brit shook her head.

"It's the truth," Tania snickered. "Shit I messed up my toe."

Erik blew out through his nose.

"What you laughing at Stevens," Tania grinned.

"YOU," he smirked looking back to her. The fuck it sound like he was laughing at? He'd have to come around more. These girls were comical. After two hours hanging out he decided to head on out. Standing to stretch, he looked at Brit in the eye for a good second as she stared back then he smiled, rolled his eyes, and looked away.

"Which one of y'all is the witch.. what y'all do to me," he asked like he was serious. "I can't believe I'm in a room of fine ass women and we ain't fucked."

"One out of four ain't bad," Brit fired causing the others including him to look at her with raised brows. It ain't like they ain't know but they ain't expect her to say it like that.

"Okay Brit!" His chest jumped in a laugh.

"Hey," she shrugged watching him and on his way out he couldn't resist thinking how he'd definitely come over to smash again.. as soon as they both had time on their schedules.

In the meantime, he had shit to attend to with classes, his workout, tutoring classmates, tutoring high school kids part time for cash, completing his assignments early to stay on top of his GPA, training Pete, getting sleep. Then he had to take the liquor money and go get the alcohol and juice for the party since he was one of the few who had a car. Other ques had different responsibilities so he ain't have an issue getting the alcohol. He wasn't paying for it.

When Saturday rolled around, Erik was high as fuck at 2 PM getting ratchet with the crew at Waffle House, his arms stretched over the back of his bench as he sat uncomfortable like he had to burp.. He had to bark! He had to. He started a chorus of loud deep barking as his bros backed him up.

"YOU READY FOR THE PARTY," Coogi amped clapping his baseball mit hands as the other niggas wilded taking over the Waffle House. Everyone in that bitch was from the same school and would probably be at the party.

"HELL YEA..," they all barked in pack unison, greeks along with the randoms in the joint. This was an Omega sanctuary, everyone knew that.

"Eh shiiidd," Erik grinned, goofy with his gold kutout fronts flashing on his top row. He was too high for that shit as they stomped and stepped doing a chant ending with them all doing their donkey kicks. Erik was jumping in spirit but getting his fatboy on physically. He paused his fork long enough to join when they all yelled "SHIIIIID."

"Get ya ass up," Grayson tugged on Erik's arm and Erik snatched it back, lunging like a rottweiler and showing his grill as he barked at him to back him the fuck up. The barks came in around him again and Grayson leaped, rubbing Erik's head and shaking his shoulders, cheering as Erik hopped up and started jumping, strolling with the group through the Waffle House as they cranked the music. Erik's head shook like he was tryna make his whole jaw shake with it and as he stuck his tongue out with his hand at an angle next to his head, bitches sitting around would grin and giggle with their friends. It felt so good to be an omega.

The night of the party, the venue was packed with hella niggas and hella females and the music was loud just like Erik liked it. It was hot as hell with everyone on top of each other, people sweating and fucked up off the omega oil. Erik was one of them. He was surrounded by people as he bounced a girl he'd lifted around his waist, daggering and dry-humpin her like a jamaican as onlookers cheered them on.

A scan through the party would show twerking, girls poppin ass half naked on the floor, niggas losing their cafeteria dinner in the most random of places, girls slipping in their heels they ain't have no business wearing, niggas jigging like they sweet for attention and throwin up their frat symbols like gang signs. And that was just the main area. Not to mention the people off fuckin in the cut. Erik felt at home finding another two girls to freak dance on and even makeout with at the same time all in the open before slapping hands with Coogi who squeezed by and called him "the nigga." Erik felt very much like that nigga and put his hands under one of the girls' crop top to grab a handful because she had big titties. Removing one hand, he boldly slipped it into the band of the other girl's bootyshorts grabbing a handful of that pussy too. She looked shocked but ain't pull his hand out. "Kiss me," he smirked and she did with a lot of tongue. "FUCK," he yelled speed fingering her as she held tight to his arm. He yanked the other girl closer and pulled her crop top but she quickly pulled it back down, giggling nervously so he focused on the girl who he was currently fingerfucking in the open with people watching. He hadn't seen her before to his knowledge but now that didn't matter. She was moaning crazily and cumming on his fingers, his hand was wet.

When he pulled it out, he used the same hand to grab her head and push her down to her knees, pressing her face to his zipper. He ain't have to tell her what to do, cameras flashed as she unzipped him and pulled out his bigass dick. It was painted half eggplant purple and half gold.

She gaped, her mouth dropped wide like she wanted to die laughing and he sniggered as he pulled her back up to her feet not wanting her to mess up the paint job as he heard the hype barking signaling him to join the line strolling through the party. He kicked his pants and briefs off leaving them with the random girl as he strolled with his painted dick out swangin as people laughed, barked, oooo'd, whistled, and cheered his crazy ass on. He ain't have nothing to hide.

The que line slid and danced through the party flirting with all the girls in their path as they chanted.

"WE SLIIIDEE!... WE SLIIIDEEE!"

Erik threw up his hand at an angle beside his head and wagged his long tongue as he danced side to side staring when he made eye contact with Brit who was smiling with her eyes again. He rolled his hips and stripped his shirt off throwing it in her direction causing her eyes to go huge as she laughed to her friend, Tania.

Tania was staring at his dick like it was a marvel of science and Brit was licking her lips giving him the look like he wouldn't go over there and fuck her on the spot with a crowd of wild ass witnesses. Now butt naked in his gold sprayed boots with nothing but his gold necklace and grills, he raised his fingers in a V and flicked his tongue between looking dead in her eyes. He wanted to do it to her right then and didn't care who saw. She pursed her lips playfully daring him to come over with her 'fuck me' eyes and his ass almost did, but he wagged his finger no with a smirk as he shook and rolled his head like the nasty dog he was.

"WE SLIIIDEE!... WE SLIIIDEE!... THROUGH THE CLUB!.. WE TAAAKE!... THAT PUSSAYYY!... WE KIIILLL!... THAT PUSSAYYY!"

Erik was entertained watching girls swoon over his frat brothers like they were celebrities and when the stroll ended, he found Brit in the crowd. She was dancing but not shaking her ass. Her hair was up in one of those top knots and she wore all black. A fitted black jumpsuit and some some low black heels. He snuck up behind her, gripping her waist and laughed, doubling over when she flinched. Her face said murder when she looked back, fist balled ready to swing, but her whole body relaxed, fist dropping as she realized it was him.

"NIGGA, DONT DO THAT!"

"MY BAD," he chuckled, not sorry at all.

"HERE TAKE YO SHIRT!" She tossed it at his chest and he caught it grabbing her waist again to pull her in close to his body.

"ERIK! WHERE YO DAMN.. OH MY GOD," she smiled looking at her friends who were dying and folding over in giggles. One even snorted and Erik's nose jokingly turned up in judgement.

"AYE HOLD UP DON'T GO NOWHERE!" Erik left her standing there to walk around in search of that girl with his pants and boxers. In the meantime, about two bold girls reached out to stroke his bicep and one girl who thought she was slick touched his dick. Before she could remove her fingers, he gripped her arm and pulled her, snatching her red solo cup to guzzle the omega oil in it and kiss her in the mouth. "YOU WANNA SUCK IT," he asked over the noise and she nodded.

Temporarily, he abandoned the search for his pants in favor of getting a blowjob a couple feet away and she wasn't bad. She was into it, but he was so drunk he couldn't nut. Pulling his dick back, he noticed she'd sucked it with the paint on it but he couldn't worry about that. He kept moving through the party until he found that girl holding his shit as she threw that ass in a circle of his frat brothers. Swaggin up, he snatched his shit and put it on, pushing her hand away as she tried to pull him onto her.

With his pants sagging over his briefs, he wandered through the party looking for Brit and finding Ashleigh. She wasn't drunk enough for his liking so he offered to get her a cup, draping his heavy and thick glistening arm over her shoulder. She said she was fine and chuckled. It looked like she was just people-watching.

The music switched and he decided to ask her since she was there, "You know where Brit went?"

"Actually," she blinked adjusting her glasses as she looked up at him, "I was just looking for her."

So now the both of them walked through the party together in search of Brit, finding Tania. Tania pointed them back where they'd come from and there was Brit... kissing some nigga on the mouth with a red solo cup raised high in her hand.

Pushing random niggas in his path aside, he walked up with Ashleigh on his trail and used his hand to karate chop between their lips, separating them as Brit's eyes popped open side-eyeing him.

"MM-MM!! WHAT YOU DOING," she squinted confused as she wiped her lips with the back of her hand. The nigga looked just as confused until Erik grabbed Brit's face with both hands and kissed her hard, his hands sliding down her body as he pulled her body flush against hers. Her tongue tasted like the liquor and she smelled like it too. He kept pulling her in tighter and her arms wrapped around his neck, her leg raising like she wanted to climb him.

Grabbing her thigh, he bent to grab the other and before he could think she was up in the air, big legs around his tapered waist as he held her up by the ass with just his hands. His feet were moving and he didn't realize until he was outside and far away from the party that he'd actually left the party and was carrying her. Where? He didn't know. She gripped his face hard like he didn't have bones in it, forcing him to focus on her and to become fully absorbed in her lips and her touch.. and he just kept walking..

#black panther killmonger #killmonger #erik killmonger x oc #erik killmonger smut #killmonger smut #original

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collegehillfanfic · 4 years

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Season 1 Episode 5

Just as Bad As You

Previously on College Hill:

“No sign of Panda, can’t say I found a fuck to give” Cece laughed as Tae playfully slapped Cece’s thigh as they laughed. “Damn who are y’all the mean girls?” Drake asked as Russ and him popped up on them. They laughed and threw back their flavored shots. “Come and dance with me short ass” Russ said pulling Cece up from the chair. Tae playfully side eyed Cece as they left to dance. “Your beautiful ass ain't exempt either, get up” Drake said as Tae received chills on her body.

Drake smirked and instead sat down, pulling Tae down into his lap as she grind on his lap. Drake leaned back and gripped her waist as Tae worked every single muscle in her body. “Why you tryna tease a nigga though” Drake whispered in Tae’s ear as he body moved to the beat of the music. “Sweetie LaShonte Heckard doesn't tease” Tae said as she got up and straddled his lap. “Is that right? Well It looks like to me your teasing the fuck out of me” Drake said matter-o-factually.

“Maybe I am because you want it just as bad as I do” Tae whispered in Drake’s ear as she rubbed up and down on his chest. Drake wasn't even planning on going to that level with Tae without really getting to know her, but what man wouldn't turn down a woman like Tae.

Don’t Hide It Say it to My Face.

~~~

Back at the College Hill House

Everybody was tired and on the verge of passing out from all the liquor in their systems. The only ones that were still up were Drake and Tae, they stumbled into the confessional as they swapped saliva from their lips. "Aubrey I'm so fucked up though" Tae said then bust up in laughter. Drake nodded and chuckled at the obvious, he just knew if she threw the pussy at him he wasn't going to deny it.

"C'mon sit your drunk ass down" He said as she plopped down in his lap and slowly closed her eyes. "Aye open them eyes up" Drake said as Tae tried fighting the urge to close her tired eyes. "But..Dri..Drizzy I'm sooo tired" She whined poking her bottom lip out. He couldn't resist the cuteness she was throwing at him. "Alright c'mon big baby" He teased as Tae attempted to stand up but slowing falling. "Shit! I got you" Drake mumbled as her ear brushed against his scruffy face. Drake smiled to himself knowing he was enjoying the current situation at hand, nothing really could interrupt this moment. "You gonna tuck me in?" Tae sheepishly asked struggling to look up at him. Drake shoot her his classic smile and nodded, something in him knew he couldn't just have her just yet. There's levels to this game.

~~~

The Next Morning

"Turn that shit down!" Panda mumbled through her pillow as the sounds of Hip Hop music blasted throughout the house. "Girl it's 10, don't you have class in 20 minutes?" LaTonya asked while smirking towards her. Panda immediately shot up from her bed, running out to the hallway. LaTonya quickly fell out as she flipped her hair and checked out her outfit. Pleased with herself, she grabbed her bag and notepad. As she stepped into the hall she was met by Trey and the girls, "Morning beautiful ladies". The three girls blushed and smiled at the handsome chocolate man in front of them. Tonya could feel Cece and Tae's eyes burning on her, all Tonya could do was blush. "You look nice today Tee" Trey complimented as Tonya smiled harder than before. "Ya'll done eye raping each other? We tryna go to class" Cece said teasing and arcing her eyebrows high. "What's stopping you though?" Tonya teased backed as her accent drawl came out and teased Trey's ears. Trey smiled and licked his lips. "Alright we're leaving, see ya'll later" Tae yelled as she dragged Cece towards the stairs. "Bye Heffa!" Tonya yelled after Cece. "So I was wondering if you wanted to come to a showcase I'm performing at?" Trey asked Tonya as her smile got bigger. "Sure" She simply said looking up towards Trey. The thing Tonya didn't know, Trey wasn't that open about he's feelings; like the females on campus portrait him as. He was slowly catching feelings for Tonya and wasn't sure if that was a good thing. Tonya quickly shook herself of this tiny moment that was surfacing between them, "Anyways let me know what's up, I gotta go to class" She said flashing Trey a smile.

"Alright T, I'll see ya later ma" He said hugging her. "Bye Trey" She said hugging him back and proceeding to the staircase. With that confirmation that Tonya could be feeling Trey he was feeling this morning's start. "Okay bro! I see you" Laith smirked peeking his head out the boy's room. "It's nothing man" Trey simply stated even though he knew it was turning into more. "Whatever man, I feel you though" Laith said he noticed steam coming from the bathroom door. "Who's in there man? It better not be one of those girls, I have class in an hour and I need to shower and piss like a bitch" Laith complained as he was gonna bang on the door but stopped in his tracks. A highly irritated Panda swung the door open with a pissed off expression grazed on her face. "Finally-" Laith was fixing to complain but Trey graciously stopped him. "Bruh" Trey said motioning to him in a way to make him realize he could possibly be in a danger zone. "Never mind, are you finished?" Laith asked as Panda rolled her eyes and pushed her way towards her room. Both of the boys just shook their heads in unison, "Man I ain't even gonna say shit" Trey said throwing his hands up in defeat.

~~~

On Campus, In The Mighty Bills Arena

"Hustle men! Hustle!" Coach Rogers yelled out to his team as he blew his whistle for the different drills. "Damn coach is on some shit" one of the boys complained as the team did back to back suicides drills. "Man one of the locker room assistance got caught messing with Reggie" Russell breathed as they jogged back and forth, up and down the court. "Word?" Russell's teammate asked as his sweaty brows ruffled. "Word" Russell confirmed. The whistle sounded once again, "Great practice, hit the showers" Assistant Coach Brown yelled. All the players stopped running and attempted to catch their breaths. "Man, I bet it was that new girl with the colored yes bruh" Russ' team said as Russ was already picturing it was Panda. "Man, I hope coach gets a handle on this shit, we got a game coming up. I don't need this drama man" Russ said unfazed that his teammates were worried about some girl stirring up shit. "Great job on the floor guys!" A familiar voice spoke out as all the guys we're whistling and causing a big noise as their towels were being passed out. "Why yall niggas getting all hyped off Suzy?" Russell asked as his questions was soon answered when his eyes met up with Panda. "Bruh! She's hella bad, ain't that one of your roommates yo?" Drew asked as Russell shook his head out of disbelief. "Man I guess it is her" Russ simply said as he tried not to make any type of eye contact with her. "Russell!" Panda's voice called out as he dreaded this conversation that was bound to take place. "My nigga, I know you hear her fine ass" Drew said as he visually scanned her body. "What's up" Russ said nonchalantly. "Nothing, just in training currently. I'm the one taking Suzy's place!" She beamed smiling extra hard.

"That's coo, congrats man" Russ said lightly taking the towel and heading into the locker room with his other teammates. "Oh Russell, I hope you don't mind but I invited the team over for a party I'm throwing in my honor of landing this job" Panda said as Russell's irritation grew. "I guess, I don't care" Russ simply said and walked passed her. In Panda's mind, she knew she made improvement with Russell. Panda happily collected all the dirty towels the players left her to pick up after. Tonight was the night where she was going to tell Russ how she felt.

#fanfiction #fan fic #CollegeHill #backtoschool

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r3b3lgrrrrrrrl · 5 years

Text

A LunaTic and her Gunn (Part 1)

"The Girl in the Cheetah Print Coat"

"OH!! KELLS!!"

Ashley yells from across the living room.

"I forgot to tell you, I invited my girl Luna out with us tonight. She's a bad ass chick whose an artist too. She shoots the most intimate pictures. You'll love her mus...."

Colson is sitting at the large dining room table rolling up joints for his birthday party tonight. He's listening but honestly he doesn't care who's gonna be there. His main objective is to get fuuuucked up tonight. Last year before The Big One.

"You mean Luna Smith, That Brooklyn Bitch!?!" Pete interrupts Ashley excitetedly. "I FUCKING LOVE HER!!! Dude, she's like one of my greatest friends. We go back to before I was doing stand up. She's one of the first people to push and shoot me."

"ME TOOOO!!!" laughs Ashley "I didn't know you knew her, that's crazy!"

In unison, "You ain't shit, until you've been shot by a Lunatic!!" they shout, laughing.

Colson fires up a joint as he vaguely listens to Pete and Ashley swap stories about this Luna chick. Running around Brooklyn, late night missions, this show here, that show there, .... all basic punk, riot gurl shit.... But wait.....? Talking her way outta a B&E AND resisting arrest charges!? Colson's ears perk up. He's just about to join the conversation when he's distracted by Dom, Ashley's boyfriend, plunking down beside him.

"Happy Fooking Birthday, Mate!!" he says as he helps out rolling and shots begin to flow. Colson's mind loses any thoughts of Luna.

---------------------------------

An hour or so passes. The rest of the band shows up and a few close friends too. They're all over to pregame before dinner and the killer house party planned for afterwards. Over the bump of the music Colson hears the door bell. Needing a break and wondering who the fuck is at his door, he yells "I've got it."

He opens the door to find the back of a tiny body in a black leather jacket with long golden blonde hair cascading down it. There's a short, flowing red dress under it, booty popping out, tattooed legs and chunky heeled combat boots.

"My kinda style..." he thinks to himself, looking her up and down.

She turns around revealing bright, blue eyes. "HI!!!" She says, a wide smile spreading acrossed her face, making her eyes dance. "I'm Luna, Ashley's friend. You must be Colson." She continues, sticking her hand out to shake his. "Uh, yeah..." He stumbles, running his hand through his blonde hair subconsciously after he shakes her hand. "C'mon on in...." He steps back to allow her inside.

"Fuck Dude. Where have I seen her before??? He wonders to himself. "GOD, I KNOW I FUCKING KNOW HER. FUCK, FUCK, FUUUCK. God she's beautiful. I hope I wasn't an asshole. Fuck."

As Luna follows Colson inside she gently grabs his wrist. When he turns to her, she says "Ash told me it was your birthday. I hope you don't mind but I made you a gift."

"Wow. Thank you." Colson says, caught even more off gaurd.

"Wanna see it?" She asks.

"FUCK YEAH!" he replies with a huge grin.

"Cool." She says with a smile. "I need a table."

"Oh, it's like that???"

"It's like that." She shrugs.

Colson guides Luna to the dining table which now is littered with liquor bottles, cans of monster, rolling papers, joints and jars of bud. He clears off a space for the black leather portfolio case he just notices that she has been carrying.

"I hope you like it." She says, looking up into his sparkling blue eyes with a tiny smile.

She unzips the leather case exposing a canvas with the logo from his Lace Up album painted as the background. In the middle is a black and white photo of a young Colson looking directly at the camera from side stage. It's safety pinned on top of a peice of studded leather. Scattered through out the canvas are cut outs displaying little negatives. The top showcases his stage name MGK and under the picture is a ripped ticket stub. Luna steps aside, watching Colson's eyes light up in excitement and disbelief.

"HOLY. FUUCK." He says, looking over at her. "This is fucking amazing. Thank you".

He reaches to hug her but she ducks out of his grasp.

"Wait, wait, wait..." She says, lifting the art peice out. She touches the bottom of the canvas, making all the negatives light up bright to be clearly seen. They are of him performing during the same show.

"WHAT THE FUCK!!" He yells bouncing around the room, geeking for a second. "THAT IS FUCKING BAD ASS!" he exclaims. Without thinking Colson grabs Luna tightly around the waist, lifting her up and spinning her around. She laughs loudly, pleased with his happiness. "Thank you." He softly says again, kissing her lightly on the forehead as he puts her down, blushing. She can't help but notice how delicious he smells, with his long arm draped around her shoulder and his 6'4 body towering over her 5'2 frame. He engulfs her as he leans in to take a closer look. He recognizes that night immediately. Leaning back and staring so deeply into her eyes he can see the ring of yellow around her irises for the first time.

"Two things. Your eyes are fucking insane. And who took these?" He asks directly.

"Uhm... Thank you? And I did, at The Gramercy, I believe. It's on the stub on the bottom." She replies.

As Colson looks at the ticket stub his heart is racing. It confirms what he knows. "It's her. It's her. It's her." His mind keeps repeating. "Holy Fuck, she's The Girl in Cheetah Print Coat!!!" his brain can't help but scream. "Fuck it" he thinks "Shoot your shot."

"You gotta boyfriend?" Colson asks Luna ducking down closer to her face, mustering all his bravery, while his left arm is still around her.

"No." She says quietly, lightly shaking her head with a look of intrigue.

With that he craddles the side of her face with his whole right hand, kissing her deeply.

Luna's body had been warm since he first scooped her up but it immediately sets on fire the moment his mouth presses upon hers. She feels a wave wash over her, making her nipples hard and vagina plump. "WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING?? I haven't since Just..." She thinks with a flash of pain in her heart before she allows herself to give into Colson completely and the electricity he sends pulsing through her body.

She kisses him back fully. Tongues dancing and exploring each other's warm mouths. Ending it with a long, intimate kiss on the lips, Colson stares at her deeply again.

"Be my birthday date?" He asks

"Yes." She answers without hesitation.

---------------------------------

From across the room Ashley and Pete stand side by side watching their friends interact. "Well, THAT was unexpected." Ashley says. "Yeah." Pete replies. He and Ashley know both Luna and Colson very well. As good friends do. "They're either gonna soar or crash and burn. Either way, it's gonna be one hell of a ride." Ashley goes on. Pete stands with his hands in his pockets. "Yep.....and I blame it all on you." He jokes, lightly jabbing her in the ribs. She shoots him a 'bitch please' look. "They've both been through a lot." Ashley says. Pete sighs. "I know." As they make their way over to their newly acquainted friends.

--------------------------------------------------

"LOOOOOONS!!!!!!!!!" Pete and Ashley both scream.

"What she make you, Kells? Ashley asks while grabbing a laughing Luna for a tight hug.

"Yeah, she makes the best presents..." Pete chimes in, waiting his turn to hug and greet his friend.

"DUDES. Check this shit out." Colson says. Picking up the canvas and displaying it proudly in front of him.

"Damn, Loons!! You really out did yourself with this one!" exclaims Ashley. "How'd you do the lights???"

Luna beams. "Thanks, Ash. I just cut the canvas and ran a little watch battery powered strand of lights around the inside of the frame to put behind the negatives. It really wasn't that hard."

"It's fucking bad ass art is what it is. Thank you again." Colson says leaning in to kiss her directly in front of their friends. Luna blushes when she catches Ashley's eye afterwards. Ashley smiles back, happy for her friend.

"NOW WHO'S READY TO GET THIS FUCKING NIGHT STARTED!!!!" Colson yells as he carefully puts his gift back into its case. "Yo, Bro" he says turning to Pete. "You mind running this up to my room so it doesn't get fucked up? Thanks, Man." He finishes as Pete agrees and takes the case.

Colson turns to Luna. "You are something else, aren't you?" He half asks, half declares to her, while holding her face with both of his huge hands. She smiles as he slides his warm tongue back into her willing mouth.

"I could kiss her all night." He thinks.

Pete interrupts them when he returns. Colson kisses Luna hard before breaking away and declaring "AND WE OUT!!". He grabs Luna's hand tightly and leads her into the night.

-----------------------------------

At TAO everyone is laughing, eating and drinking. Luna is set between Colson and Ashley. Across from Pete and Rook, whom she just met but immediately decides she likes when he brings his drumsticks to dinner.

"Why do they call you That Brooklyn Bitch?" Rook asks.

Pete laughs "Because Loons over here is the ultimate underground scene queen. She knows you're hot before YOU know you're hot. Plus, her grandparents are Patti Smith and Robert Mapplethorpe. AND, she'll fuck you up, no questions asked. You don't get anymore Brooklyn than that." Pete continues laughing.

Luna rolls her eyes and smiles. "Thanks, Bud. You describe me so well. Fuck that I'm an artist. I make people cooool" Luna smiles, giving Pete the finger. "And of course you just gotta fit my lineage in there, hunh? Fucking Ass." She says laughing, throwing a peice of bread at him. "No," she continues, still smiling, turning to look at Rook. "I've had that nickname since I was a kid. It started because I was never afraid to throw down. No matter where you or I are. If you are my friend and there is a problem, you can count on that bitch from Brooklyn to be there."

"TRUTH!!" Shouts Ashley next to her. The girls laugh, as Ashley raises her glass to Luna's, cheersing all the shit they have experienced together through out the years.

Luna turns back to Rook "Ultimately it morphed and took on a life of it's own. I eventually began using it as my pen name when I first started putting my work out because I wanted to succeed on my merit, not my name. None of my art... visual, audio, none of it, is signed with my real name. It's all That Brooklyn Bitch."

Rook nods his head in acceptance. "Scraper trying to make it on her own name. I can dig it."

"Hold up. You're Patti Smith's granddaughter. Like THE Patti Smith?" Colson chimes in.

Even though his hand was on her thigh, Luna didn't realize he was listening. "Mhm." She replies.

"That's crazy. I'm reading Just Kids right now. I didn't know they had a kid. I thought he was gay????"

Luna chuckles at his confusion. Smiling she says "Yes, yes he was gay. But yes, they did have a baby. My mom's not in the book upon my request. They had put her up for adoption and only reconnected when I was young, shortly before she died. That's how I ended up with my Mom-mom's last name. She adopted and raised me afterwards."

"Damn Babe, I'm sorry." Colson says putting his arm around her shoulder.

"No need, I'm ok.... As long as you don't ever call me Babe again, you're much more creative than that." She says with a smirk, leaning up to kiss him on the cheek.

"Word. We'll come up with something special." He says with a smile kissing her on the lips. "You ready to party?" he asks as he stands up lifting one of the dozens of shots of Patron that have magically appeared on the table. "To a great night. Great friends, and to an upcoming great year!! Let's get FUCKED up! The only thing I wanna remember from tonight..." he continues, looking down at Luna "is that tonight was the night I finally met Luna Smith, That Brooklyn Fucking Bitch!!!"

Laughing everyone cheers and slams the celebratory shot.

-----------------------------------

To be continued.... Because after dinner is the ride to the birthday party and after the birthday party is the after party.... And exactly what is up with The Girl in the Cheetah Print Coat????

🎉😈 🎉

#mgk fanfic #mgk #colson baker #machine gun kelly #est4life #fangirl #lovestory #mgk imagine #mgk smut #not safe for minors #not safe for tumblr #lunatic #series #long reads #mgk x reader #marijuana #drugs #drinking

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