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honourablejester · 3 years

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Ideas for Sorcerers (D&D)

I do love a bit of innate, chaotic magic, the forces of the world writing themselves onto people. Whether said people wanted them to or not. Heh. I will admit I’m a bit more attached to the ‘touched by cosmic forces’ angle for the sorcerer, it’s really great for backstories, but the bloodlines are also fascinating for the ‘family lore’ and ‘really adventurous ancestors’ ideas. So!

I’m mostly focused on the classic sorcerers and then the horror-adjacent sorcerers, because I’m me, and we know what I like. Apologies to fans of the Divine, Storm or new Clockwork sorcerers!

Draconic

Because dragons (and dragon ancestors) are the best. There’s a lot of fun and aesthetic with choosing your dragon ancestor too. The little scales you get with draconic resilience just make for some really cool-looking characters.

I love the idea of mixing ancestries with a draconic sorcerer. Compare and contrast. For example, a tiefling draconic sorcerer with gold dragon ancestry! Combining a ‘tainted’ bloodline with a respected one. Maybe the clan lean heavily into the lawful reputation of gold dragons, as well as a sort of internalised racism against their own darker ancestry as well. They view the fact that they were once favoured by a divine dragon as proof that their bloodline can redeem themselves of their demonic pact/ancestry, and they lean towards lawful occupations, city watch, soldiers, clergy, etc. So your sorcerer has a bit of internal conflict going on. (Also, a red tiefling with gold scales is an awesome look – tiefling skin colours with dragon scale colours is a really fun combination)

Other cool-sounding ancestry combinations: high elf & white/silver ancestry, for that ethereal immortal feeling (also fun to add stereotypical dragon traits with the white dragons, in that you’re an ethereal immortal who really holds a grudge and does not do ‘forgive and forget’), half-elf & green ancestry, for a strongly outcast, political bent, halfling/gnome & copper ancestry, because if you’re going to go for a tiny trickster you might as well go all out …

Or we have my old favourite, a tortle sorcerer with (somehow) a dragon turtle ancestor, because great-grandpa Uhok never met an older and (significantly) larger lady he didn’t want to pursue, and great-grandma Korthalok was honestly rather flattered. (Yes, I am aware that dragon turtles are not high dragons, but they are intelligent, and they’re probably innately magical/elemental enough to put a bit of magic in the bloodline)

Shadow Magic

The sorcerer’s gothic option! I do love it. Your magic comes from a strange, grim shadow realm, either because you were touched by said realm, or one of your ancestors was an entity from said realm. You get a demonic shadow hound, teleportation from shadow to shadow, and later an actual shadow form. Lots to work with there.

I feel like there’s a lot of Lovecraftian, Dreamlands, William Hope Hodgson sort of feeling here. The dark touch of a strange realm. Emphasis on isolation, desolation, alienation. Loneliness. This is also the subclass where I really, really like a later-life coming into your powers, a traumatic event causing a normal person to suddenly develop horrifying magic.

So. Any of your gothic/cosmic horror backstories. You were kidnapped and subjected to a horrific ritual. You were created in a horrific ritual (hi Warforged!). You suffered a severe, inexplicable illness as a child, and remained pale, half-dead, and possessed of strange powers for the rest of your life (I love the shadow sorcerer quirks list). An insane ancestor entered the Negative Plane and your line was almost annihilated by the resulting Nightwalker, but you somehow survived. Your parent was an extremely powerful magic user studying the Shadowfell, and you only realised much later on in your life that your childhood ‘imaginary friends’ were actually Sorrowsworn (Lost and Lonely?) that haunted your ancestral home and that your parent was somehow keeping from killing you. You tried to steal from a powerful, vindictive wizard, who flung you into the Shadowfell for your temerity, and you don’t fully remember how you survived. You slept in a barrow as a dare when you were younger, and an allip whispered secrets to you that lead you to dream of a dark realm, dreams that seemed to gradually change you as you ‘recovered’ …

This entire subclass is just very much ‘go nuts on the horror tropes and have fun’. I love it dearly.

Aberrant Mind

A new one from Tasha’s, but the other Lovecraftian/horror themed sorcerer subclass now. Which is perfectly fine, because I can always roll with more Lovecraftian horror! If shadow magic was themed strongly towards undead, Aberrant Mind seems strongly themed towards aberrations. Body horror and psychic powers! Boo yeah!

I do like the suggested origins. Particularly the parasitic twin and the imaginary friend ones. I think there’s a lot of fun to be had with those. Aberrant mind does feel more … on the science fiction end of horror, more than the fantasy? There’s a different flavour compared to shadow magic. We’re talking alien abduction and Carrie-esque childhood trauma here. Particularly when you get to the higher level actual physical transformation elements. Bit of Akira in there, bit of Innsmouth. So.

I’m liking characters who are a bit ‘aberrant’ on their own merits, even before their powers kick in as well. The outcasts from the get-go. The albino half-orc abandoned by the tribe as a child and befriended/kept safe by their possibly-imaginary flumph friend. The fallen aasimar whose blessings allowed them to survive where their stillborn twin did not, but who still feels the touch of a ghostly hand in theirs (I’m not sure how well it fully gels, but I feel like an Atropal is a very interesting concept to lay alongside this – stillborn gods and blessed, aberrant champions – celestial guides and the whisperings of parasitic twins … not sure how well it fits, but there’s a lot of crunchy concepts there)

Also, there’s your chance to have some fun with the Underdark races. Duergar, Deep Gnomes and Drow. Or sea races, when we have fun with Aboleths. Or non-sea races who still had a bit of fun with Aboleths, if we want to fully embrace the Innsmouth vibes and have normal land-based elves/humans/halflings who come over all Deep-One in the end. You come from a quaint little village on the coast, where the coming-of-age ceremony involved something of an opening of the mind. Nothing to worry about, everyone does it where you come from. Yes indeed! Heh.

And then, to bring us back to the less-horrifying end of sorcerers, and to revisit my childhood in a big way, we have:

Wild Magic

Schmendrick the Magician! Sorry, I grew up on The Last Unicorn, you’ll have to forgive me this. (Is Schmendrick actually part of the inspiration here, I’m wondering?)

But honestly, wild magic really lends itself to down-on-their-luck characters, running ahead of their own chaos, or striving to learn to control their powers. Or, on the flipside, incredibly laissez-faire types who decided to just roll with and eventually enjoy or perpetuate a little chaos. So. Tricksters, shysters and earnest young things trying to do their best.

So. You could do a straight Schmendrick. A down-on-their-luck kid who really, really wants to be a real wizard, a great magician, but their magic just will not cooperate. It has a mind of its own, and their struggle is learning to either minimise or lean into the chaos and power of it. (I like a background as a tailor/seamstress for this, partly because of animated Schmendrick’s memorable patchwork robes, but also as a little practical detail in that, if you can’t trust your magical mending not to do a ‘Sorcerer’s Apprentice’ on it every damn time, you probably would learn to darn your socks the old fashioned way)

For a variation, you could do a bit of a snake-oil salesperson sort of deal. A down-on-their-luck sorcerer turned shyster/criminal to make ends meet. Wild magic works very well as a sort of bloodline curse, bad luck and chaos following a family. A woman of the Witchbottle clan pissed off an archfey way back when, and so every girl born to the line since has struggled with wild magic. So the clan tends to move around a lot, both individually and as a whole, and individual members of it tend to work around their inevitable getting run out of town for magical mishaps in their own ways. The clan has a lot of travelling entertainers, salespeople, criminals, etc, and tend to be very loyal to each other, even if they don’t see each other all that often (concentrations of wild magic in a single area tend to be bad for said area, so family gatherings are discouraged near civilisation).

And then there are your straight trickster characters. Ones with a more philosophical approach to chaos, a belief that you should be able to deal with the unexpected, and that maybe other people should be helped along in experiencing and dealing with it too. I like bards for tricksters, but wild magic sorcerers work very well too. Heh.

I know Wild Magic might not be the most functional of the subclasses, but it’s got a direct line to my childhood, and I feel like it’s still a really fun idea.

In summary? I like the squishy spindly magic people. They’re fun.

#d&d #dnd #sorcerers #character concepts #long post #fantasy #dark fantasy #horror #lovecraftian #i do love d&d's more horror-leaning elements

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a-deadly-serenade · 3 years

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overall this season was pretty decent. i have some thots whats new so im gonna share them below the cut if anyone’s interested :)

so!! first off i’ll say that there were a lot of things i did really enjoy from season 4!

the action was super fun as always!! i loved all the crazy enemies and callbacks! the skeleton fight and all those little goblins they kept killing throughout were a nice touch ;) sypha’s use of her powers is INSANE her ice-chainsaw?? her WALL of fire?? electric balls?? come on. and the animation was NICE. i really wanna know who did most of the fight scenes bcuz the style is so different and it just POPS but in a really good way?

my favorite fight has to be ofc when everyone is REUNITED yes im basic. but the THEME song going off and well, im a whore for sotn references and i CAME when i saw the leap stone ref w the winged cape or when alucard turned into a hoard of batss AND THEN HIS WOLF FORM OOOOHH BABY!!! actually episode 9 is just a straight banger.

STRIGAAA. STRIGA. oh mama i was sweating during that fight. mad kudos to her va for them growlsss

carmilla vs isaac was a lot of fun and i loved the visuals but my hype was instantly ruined when i saw her kill herself 😭but thats smth i’ll complain about later.

not all the lines were bangers, some of sypha’s swearing seemed even a bit too much at times, and it was especially jarring to be having a face-to-face death-math with literal Death and hes acting like a naughty little 5 year old thats just learnt to swear. maybe cut back on the fuck-isms? just a bit? BUT when they hit they did GOOD. “the fuck what now?” yes

ISAAC. you weren’t in this season as much but man do u still shine through. i loved his introduction back in the town where he has his night creatures digging graves and rebuilding the city 😭 and then the conversation he shares w his flyman?? obsessed.

Hector chopping his finger off and giving lenore and carmilla a good ol FUCK YOU!! as he helps isaac. we love to see it

Trevor and Sypha’s “I love you!” “I know.” <3

DEATHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

oh! alucard actually having a story & purpose in the plot? :) luv it love to see it. that being said... the Plot.

its... ok? it’s kind of split up into 3/4 parts, as the story progresses, one eventually merges with several of the others kind of? cohesively? while leaving the other to sort itself out.

now, i didnt have too many qualms with it, it was pretty straight forward. dracula is going to be resurrected and we have sypha and trevor looking in on it, while alucard helps the nearby village and hector and isaac go on about bringing on their inevitable showdown. however, the way the story was paced and some of the decisions they made... werent so great.

st. germain for example, brought the ENTIRE momentum from the last few episodes to a halt. you have sypha and trevor fighting through heaps and heaps of monsters only to find themselves back in Targoviste where they meet the mysterious Zamfir!! and Alucard!! he’s been asked to help save this village!! all jam-packed with crazy action and animation that leaves you fired up!! and then episode 5 comes to a screeching halt and we spend nearly the entire thing on st. germain’s backstory and explaining his motives for the rest of the season

like. imma be real with you chief: he didnt need to be here lol. you could have just left varney as the main vamp in charge of bringing back big daddy drac and he could reveal to his.. idk henchmen or something that he’s death. but u gotta fill them ten 20 minute slots somehow!! he just fell so flat and unfortunately, a lot of the side-characters suffer from this this season.

i enjoyed great and zamfir, i love their desgins esp, but they really could have been fleshed out more. zamfir is shown as nothing but a spoiled brat the majority of the time she’s on screen but they wait till she’s about to die to try and turn her character around? huh? greta is given a bit more screentime but this sudden confession of feelings in the last episode felt so... huh?? why couldnt she just be dedicated to her people and show that u can love someone w/out necessarily being their partnr? i thot that was her whole thing; taking care of her people. it’s like. where did this come from. they cant have known each other more than a week at most dog 😭

it sucks they dedicated to much time to scenes that didnt really need to be there where we could have gotten this proper development, like maybe have a scene zamfir and sypha connect over struggles they’ve dealt with in the past and that has her open up about how traumatizing dracula’s attack on her city was. u could have expanded upon her role in the court and WHY she worshipped the monarchy so much instead of making it a throwaway gag about her being “crazy”. but why have that when we could instead spend the first 5 minutes of said episode watching a monotonous back-and-forth b/w varney and that big burly russian vampire who’s name im sure mor than 98% of the audience cant even remember?

just a lot of fat that needed to be trimmed so that the actual MEAT of the story could be slow cooked to perfection. people really arent kidding when they say less is more.

another big problem i had was there... i dont even know what to call it, re-humanization? redemption? of Lenore. like lmk if im wrong but she manipulated hector, yeah? coerced sex to slip on that ring that binds him to her?? orr whatever weird shit warren’s into. but the way they interacted, ESPECIALLY in their first major scene together was sooo uncomfortable to watch lol at first i thought perhaps hector was only playing along because well. hes enslaved to do her and carmilla’s bidding. but no, he actually LIKES her. he spares her when isaac comes around, he says that he wants to keep her as his own. and in the meantime, lenore finds time to complain to a man that’s been beaten and enslaved how upset it makes her that carmilla got angry at her 😭 or says thats she tired of isaac keeping tabs on her and wants to escape this ‘cage’. to aman thats literally been imprisoned since youve known him 😭her death is seen as peaceful, calm, they even try and tug at ur heartstrings by swelling this sad, dramatic music as the sun rises. really? LENORE?

and carmilla’s death happened WAYY too early imo. she was the villain for practically 3 seasons and this is how she goes? isaac couldnt get more than a stab at her? his night creatures couldnt take a nibble? HECTOR couldnt even be given a chance to do somethng like come on

the resolution was... strange? it was cute!! and happy!! but i dunno if they really needed to have lisa and vlad coming back, but, like i said; it was cute! definitely not the ending i was expecting.

i’m glad that they put their focus back on what made the show so much fun and that was the FIGHTS. they definitely helped add some much needed spice to things when scenes started to drag, but im a gal that really luvs a good story and even though reviews were raving that this season helped closed the lid on all the themes theyd been exploring, i just didnt really see that. which isnt necessarily a BAD thing, i knew i wasnt gonna find some deep introspective themes in this hack n slash horror-fantasy, its just what can turn somethng like this from an ok show to a GREAT one.

in the end, im glad they stopped at this one and im curious to see if they really DO go ahead on making spin-offs. bcuz unfortunately, i will always be down for som new castlevania content

#cv4 #this is REALLY long #and BRIMMING with spoilers #so read at ur own discretion #otherwise ty for spending ur valuable time to hear what a random sob like me has to say <3

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howwnowbrowncoww · 3 years

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10 Characters, 10 Fandoms

thanks for the tag @vidramon! I’m going to refrain from picking Malroth since it’s a total given for me lol and since you already wrote some pretty great stuff about him. These aren’t really in any order and I picked off the top of my head so I’m sure I’m missing a few I’d really be able to chat your ears off about, but this was fun anyway!

Oops, editing this to say anyone can try it out! Not tagging anyone specific this time, but if you want to talk about 10 characters you love, please add on an share or make your own post and tag me because I’d love to see!

1. Bado (Rune Factory 4)

Honestly, I love all the characters from 4, but this loser holds a special place in my heart. His half-hearted passion for getting rich quick but lack of follow through when it comes to negatively impacting people around him with his schemes is oddly endearing. I equally want to wring his neck and be his best friend. I also will die mad that he wasn’t a marriage candidate>:T

2. Tamaki Amajiki (BNHA)

It was a toss up between him and Shinsou, but I picked Tamaki because I can relate more to him. I love seeing him fight with determination and courage despite how much anxiety he has. He works hard despite all his perceived faults, and his supportive friend group makes me so happy for him! I left off mid season 4 of the anime but I want to pick it up again just for him and Shinsou lol

3. Ghirahim (Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword)

Okay, I know, major leap from anxious Tamaki, but Ghirahim is a fave on the complete opposite side of the scale. This guy is obviously an asshole. A total jerk. Dickhead supreme. But he’s a very fun and interesting villain (in the worst way) imo. I’m also a huge fan of WindWaker Ganondorf because of his drive as a villain, but I picked Ghirahim since SS is getting remade soon. Idk, his design is eye-catching, every time I got to meet him in the game, he always had interesting dialouge (putting it lightly), and his personality uh...leaves much to be improved upon, but he HAS ONE! I’m tired of boring villains with lackluster motivations. Okay, his motivations were kinda expectable too, but his overwhelming desire to kill me in an extremely over-the-top dramatic fashion at all times was refreshing.

4. Sophie (Howl’s Moving Castle)

I know a lot of people have a favorite Sophie (either the book or movie version), but I like both equally for really different reasons. I related to movie Sophie a lot as a kid (still kinda do), so I have nostalgia going for me there, but book Sophie is a wild card. I lover her. She’s nuts, she won’t hesitate to throw acid, she can and will do whatever the hell she wants. I really want to be her.

5. Fenris (Dragon Age 2)

It was SO HARD to pick between him, Bull, and Dorian, because I haven’t played any of the games, but I want to meet them all so damn bad lol. I OWN all the games, I just haven’t played them yet /cries/. Ironically, I took a quiz the other day and it said I’d be Fenris, and I honestly was just more concerned than anything considering his backstory lmao. Anyway, I love an elf who can wield a greatsword and rip people’s hearts from their bodies while avoiding his emotionally traumatic past:>

6. Galo Thymos (Promare)

Look, I absolutely ADORE everyone in this entire movie, but this moron just hits all the best character traits for me. He’s passionate, he’s stupider than all get out, and he’s constantly shirtless while almost dying and saving the day through sheer god-defying luck and a refusal to lay down and die. There’s just something about himbos that gets me, ya know?

7. Kurapika Kurta (Hunter X Hunter)

Kurapika has what Sasuke could NEVER. Literally, Kurapika has such a more satisfying revenge/redemption ark than anything I’ve ever seen. I love his interaction with Melody and the main group, the red eyes thing is so BADASS (again, still cooler than Sasuke’s), the chains are both aesthetic as HELL and insanely, terrifyingly effective. Never seen a cooler anime character in my entire life. I also just really, really want to give him a fucking hug, like wow he really needs one.

8. Apollo Justice (Ace Attorney games)

Apollo is a new love of mine (also from a game I haven’t played yet) as well as another character for me to eventually project onto;) He’s anxious, he yells a lot, he’s oblivious as fuck, but he has the passion I love in all my characters. This boy is in for a world of hurt (from the many spoilers I have run into by browsing the game tags prematurely lol), but I know he’ll pull through! He has his family by his side!;-;

9. Sakura Haruno (Naruto)

Don’t even get me started on Sakura>:O I love her so much. I did not appreciate her near enough as a kid (maybe understandably since she was written for shit). Instead of going back and rewatching the show to face inevitable disappointment, I just read fics that fix all of the crappy things the show did to her:) This girl could crush me like a bug and I am looking respectfully!!

10. Tadashi Hamada (Big Hero 6)

Saving the most underloved one for last;-; Tadashi I miss you. I rewatch this goddamn movie just for you (and sometimes Baymax). I have the only shirt I could ever find with him on it and I also have his hat because once I latch onto a character, I apparently never let go. It’s a shame Disney had to kill him off to further the plot. I was so desperate for more content of this character that I found myself falling down theory spirals about how he may come back as Sunfire (that name may be wrong, it’s been a few years lol). Ultimate big brother, great best friend, everyone loved him and knew he was creating good things for the world, super goofy: literally I think I just aspired to be more like him when I first saw the movie. Mad respect for this dude.

#long post #tag tag #my post #not really but i want to be able to find it later

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imitorisus-a · 5 years

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Shinya should be friendlier...

if you believe that at any point in the story Shinya has ever given off the impression he is genuinely friendly towards other people, you’ve completely misunderstood the significant trait of his character and what makes him so intriguing and heartbreakingly captivating.

please put yourself in his shoes for a moment; at the age of five, Shinya was sold by his own parents to the Hiragi family where he was forced to participate and train for a battle royale among other CHILDREN his age, the reward being guaranteed survival and the chance to live a life that was no longer his own to control. in other words, winner would be adopted into the Hiragi family as Mahiru’s betrothed, all for the purpose of breeding so that the family clan could maintain a strong bloodline. the way i see it, Shinya’s unhappiness was inevitable and he was destined to live a life in a prisoner’s shackles. the children were mistreated there; they were beaten into shape and basically brainwashed into obtaining the mindset of a weapon. so much abuse had been inflicted onto Shinya, and all at the age of FIVE.

the smile you see on his face? and the seemingly inviting and charming personality to him? that’s a facade. during his time training as a child, he found the easiest way to cope through the fear and sadness was to smile - as crying was not permitted nor tolerated. he had also learned that a smile worked to his advantaged; no one fears a cute smiling kid after all, right? the other kids underestimated him because of this and, therefore, made them easier kill for Shinya. you see, he wanted to win. he needed to. he was scared of dying and honestly, no one can blame him. imagine being ten years old and knowing that if you don’t kill every other person in the room, you’ll be killed. the entire experience traumatized and damaged him emotionally, but the smile he wears even as an adult hides it so well, much like it had when he was a child.

now as for the friendly part… Shinya actually hates the idea of making friends. the thought of making friends hurts him so much that he even kept his distance from the other students while attending shibuya high school. this was because he had a best friend that he’d known since elementary, both of them having been sold by their guardians to the Hiragi family. Shinya had been forced to kill him in order to survive; this was his best friend. his brother. the only person who made every day in that slaughter house bearable. the only reason ( and people either forget this or don’t know this because they never read the novels ) that shinya even approached Guren in the first place was because Mahiru would talk about him nonstop. Mahiru was his fiancee and while Shinya never had any sort of romantic feelings for her, he was competitive and this never left him, even as a teenager. he wanted to see who this Guren guy was that had won her heart. their encounter ( which was shinya beating the crap out of guren ) was really out of genuine curiosity and once Shinya assessed the situation he was able to see the opportunity and advantage that could come of being “friends” with Guren. Shinya’s plan was to take out the Hiragi clan but knew he couldn’t do it alone so decided that by using Guren’s help, he could get closer to reaching his objective. any friends that Shinya ever made, it was to manipulate them in order to achieve his revenge. of course, he did come to care for Guren once he started relating more to him but it took time for Shinya to really open up to Guren and honestly, Guren is really his only true friend, Kureto following after. but let it not be forgotten, shinya was always willing to play dirty if it meant getting what he wanted.

what i love about Shinya’s character, anon, is that despite the adversities in his life, he grew up to find strength through them. he now wants to save more lives than he’d taken as a child and does show better morals but this does not mean he’s changed completely. he’s still very much carrying the scars of the past and we see this throughout the manga ( the anime doesn’t do justice and probably never will ). Shinya has shown time and time again that he’ll choose who he decides to care for and is actually pretty indifferent toward many other characters in the series. if you think Shinya is the good guy in the series, you’re only seeing what you want to see and not the bigger picture.

so no, i disagree. Shinya shouldn’t be portrayed as “friendlier” toward everyone. and if he is, it’s because he’s acting the part to gain something. he can be a good person trying to change his ways but that doesn’t mean it’s okay to dismiss his entire backstory and character because people choose to label him under the “cinnamon roll” trope. i’m playing him realistically and not as the fandom has romanticized him to be. if he was just the friendly, cute, cinnamon roll type of male character, i’d have never taken him on as a muse nor have loved him as much. he’s soooo much more, anon. so complex. deep. insightful. tragic. intriguing. intense. he just conceals all that beneath the veil of his smile, which is what makes him one of the more scarier characters of the series. you never know what he’s thinking, his eyes still cold and piercing. his smile, devilish and cunning. but i guess, if many readers are in fact fooled by the act of his character, that’s probably the point they’re trying to get across.

I RAMBLED BUT I’M SORRY, I GET SO PASSIONATE ABOUT SHINYA’S CHARACTER.

#♚ ──── ❝ inbox / answered. ） anon ❞#♚ ──── ❝ inbox / answered. ） ooc ❞#♚ ──── ❝ ooc. ） i love one ( 1 ) sniper boi ❞#( no one is obligated to follow me if you feel i'm portraying him wrong or not to your liking )#( i hate hate hateeee that the fandom makes him out to be the weak little angel that needs to be saved by guren )#( shinya is a decent person NOW. but he's still fighting with his demons and he'll still make mistakes and bad decisions )#( when he sees injustice he'll speak up depending on the situation but )#( he also knows life isn't fair sometimes )#( remember: shinya told yoichi the harsh realities of being a sniper )#( that if need be snipers will have to take down their own comrades )#( in order to stop intel from being leaked to the vampires or any other enemies )#( his sense of justice can be argued where it's a little more twisted than your average hero )#( please please don't reduce MY shinya to that gross cinnamon roll trope )#( don't assume he'll be nice to your muse )#( or that he'll tolerate being disrespected )#( catch him on a bad day and he'll make you regret it )

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metalandmagi · 5 years

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February Media Madness!

Hello and welcome to “see how I wasted my time” the post where I keep track of all the media I consume in a month. If you’re new here, this is mainly just my excuse to shout into the void about my feelings on things I’ve watched or read in a month. And it’s almost been a year!

Movies!

Ocean’s 8: Sandra Bullock assembles a team of ladies to steal a super fancy diamond necklace. As someone who has never seen an Ocean’s movie before, I thought this was fun. I like heists, and I LOVE jewel heists. The characters are all great, not particularly deep, but they don’t have to be. And Anne Hathaway steals the show. However, there’s a glaring problem with this movie, and it’s the fact that everything seems ridiculously easy for them, taking away any sense of tension. There’s a lot of points where things should cause significant problems but...don’t. So if you stop asking questions and just go with it, it’s a good time. 7/10

Boku no Hero Academia- Two Heroes: It’s the BNHA version of Die Hard. Seriously, All Might and a bunch of other heroes and citizens are taken hostage by villains in a skyscraper, and the most popular characters from the UA class have to save them. And it’s good. Just like the show. I’ve never gotten hyped up for this series as much as everyone else seems to, but it’s enjoyable and the movie has more of the good action and fun characters! I did feel like it went on a little long, and I wish we had gotten more of the characters doing stuff on the island instead of mainly just the villain plot. I think it’s because it reminded me a lot of the vacation arc in Assassination Classroom. But whatever, it’s still fun and worth watching. 7/10

Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them: Awkward magizoologist Newt Scamander accidentally releases a bunch of magical creatures into 1920s New York and must round them all up with the help of lovable muggle/no-maj Jacob Kowalski. And there’s some horror movie type stuff going on with a creepy kid and Grindelwald in disguise. It’s the spin-off/prequel to Harry Potter that we all know and...love? I know some people resent this movie just for existing, but I like it. I like the creatures. I like going to new places in the wizarding world. I like Newt. I like Tina. I LOVE Queenie and Jacob, both separately and together. The plot is a little...stretched, but I don’t mind that much. And no one had the good sense to keep Colin Farrell as Grindelwald. However, I haven’t seen the second movie yet, so I should probably have my Harry Potter super fan card revoked. I honestly think that this could have been a fine stand alone movie or maybe a duology, where the second movie focuses on the backstory between Dumbledore and Grindelwald, and Grindelwald’s rise to power. I certainly don’t need five movies of this though, and I think everyone would rather see a prequel of Harry Potter’s parents in the marauders era instead. Oh well, I still like this movie for what it is. I just don’t need five of them. 7.5/10

How to Train Your Dragon 2: Five years after the viking village of Berk has accepted dragons instead of fighting them, a mysterious villain with a dragon army wants to...idk take over the world or something, so naturally it’s up to a wiry 20 year old Hiccup to stop the seemingly inevitable war. I love this movie, both as a sequel and a solid story in a trilogy. It has its issues, mainly the fact that it glorifies/glosses over absentee parents and its final act seems like it was hastily rewritten as a merchandising opportunity...but dang other than that I can’t really say anything bad about it. I’m even one of the few people who like the side characters. The time jump feels natural, and I liked seeing everything come together after watching the TV series. It also of course has great music, stunning animation, and a lot of heart and effort put into every minute. I alsothink this sequel has an interesting message about how different people view peace and war and whether or not people are capable of change. So yeah, this is one of those series that I think has something for everyone. 9/10

The Lego Movie 2- The Second Part: Five years after the first Lego movie ends with “aliens” invading, the Lego universe has become a post-apocalyptic society where everything is not awesome. And after another invasion, all the important characters except Emmet get kidnapped, and he has to save everyone from an...evil(?) queen. But really it’s a story about getting along and seeing things from other people’s perspectives. It’s fun, and it has incredibly creative music (and please for the sake of all that is good, watch the credits song). But there are times when I wished it wouldn’t lean so heavily on the...fourth wall breaking from the first movie. I felt like I would have completely understood what must be happening outside the Lego world to drive the plot, and then they would just cut to the human characters to explain everything. But it’s still a great time and hilarious as expected. 8/10

Books!

(To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before) P.S I Still Love You by Jenny Han: The second book in the To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before trilogy. It serves to give you a glimpse into Lara Jean and Peter’s life as a couple. It’s like a sweet slice of life anime where some notable things occur, like the hot tub video plot that was in the movie happens AND JOHN AMBROSE MCCLAREN SHOWS UP..but there’s no real plot. And that’s fine! This was a super fun read, just like the first one, and John Mcclaren is amazing. There’s really only one major problem I have with this book, and it’s Gen’s and Lara Jean’s relationship. Throughout the book LJ knows something bad is happening with Gen’s family. We know that Peter is still Gen’s friend and promised her he wouldn’t say anything, which is justifiable as something friends do! I wish we could have seen Peter trying to convince Gen to apologize or explain the situation to LJ, but it is what it is. However, we also know Gen did something truly terrible in posting the hot tub video, and literally nothing going on in her personal life or her past justifies her being a life ruining bitch just because she feels bad. So what I really wanted to see was LJ marching up to her and saying “I know you’re going through something, but you ruined my fucking life for no apparent reason, so I demand an apology and an explanation” like the boss she is. And, as anyone who watched the movie knows, Gen tries to be the martyr and gain sympathy by placing the blame on LJ because of something that happened in FREAKING MIDDLE SCHOOL! I cannot stress enough how out of line Gen’s character is, and no amount of hastily garnered sympathy or backstory reveals will make her better. But yeah other than that, it was very enjoyable. And if Lara Jean doesn’t want John Ambrose Mcclaren, then I’ll take him. 8/10

King of Scars by Leigh Bardugo: It’s the start of a new series in Bardugo’s “Grishaverse”. And yes you absolutely need to read both the Grisha Trilogy and the Six of Crows duology to read this. KoS centers around the now King Nikolai Lanstov who has been possessed by a monster created by the Darkling. Also Ravka is once again on the brink of war, Nikolai must think about getting married, and there’s a cult that wants the Darkling to made a saint. But actually, this book is split into three different stories: one following Nikolai and Zoya trying to get rid of the monster, one following Nina on a secret mission in Fjerda, and one following what's happening in Ravka while Nikolai is away. So basically, one part Nina being a badass, one part eldritch horror story, and one part The Prince and The Pauper. And it was pretty good...except for the fact that I understood almost none of Nikolai and Zoya’s story after the second half of the book. I wasn’t into the...saint business because it seemed so out of place for this series. I also feel like she missed out on some great characters meeting each other. Oh well, it’s still a great study in world building and character interactions, the ending is buck wild, and Nina continues to be a bisexual disaster...so it’s worth it. 8/10

The Magician’s Nephew by C.S. Lewis: Several decades before the Pevensies stepped through the wardrobe, young Digory Kirke (aka the Professor) and Polly Plummer are roped into a traumatizing adventure of their own. Only instead of saving Narnia, they accidentally release a younger but just as intimidating Jadis from her own dying world into London, and in an attempt to get her out of Earth, end up letting her loose in the newly created Narnia. This is probably the book with the most similarities to TLTWATW, with a truly terrifying villain, a winding but whimsical plot, and a lot of humor. Digory and Polly are the most well written children so far. They are both hilarious great characters in their own ways, and I love seeing them fight and make up like actual kids who are friends. While Digory has to go through his own redemption arc similarly to Edmund, Polly is always there as the voice of the audience telling him to not be a dumbass. Not to mention whenever he tries to get away with saying something sexist, she’s shuts him down like a badass. And there’s also a London cabby who literally tells Aslan that he’ll be king of Narnia if his awesome wife gets to come too...and there’s a horse named Strawberry that turns into a Pegasus. So what’s not to like? People may complain about all the religious metaphors and creationism, but come on lighten up. At least it’s not horribly racist, and you’ll long for the simple biblical similarities when you’re faced with the layers of religious offense in The Last Battle. 9/10

The Last Battle by C.S. Lewis (mild spoilers): The final book in the Chronicles of Narnia series, in which the world ends because a talking ape convinces a donkey to dress up as Aslan to trick all the Narnians into giving them stuff. There’s a lot more to this plot, but those are the basics. There is a TON of stuff to unpack in this epic conclusion, and this isn’t even the half of it.

This book seems like the Last Jedi for this series, in that some people are incredibly moved by it and are very happy with the conclusion our main characters have been given, and some people think it’s a pile of crap. I think there is good in this book. But, putting aside my good feelings for a second, THE LAST BATTLE IS ONE OF THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLY RACIST THINGS I’VE EVER READ...voluntarily anyway. Seriously, if you thought The Horse and His Boy was bad, you ain't seen nothing yet. There are many layers of why this particular plot in the series is so offensive I could write essays on why this book should be thrown out the window. Not to mention the Susan problem. So I'll say, that even though there were good things in this book, it doesn't excuse...everything else. Also Eustace isn’t as snarky in this one...I miss my sarcastic sass boy.

HOWEVER, unlike some people, I think it was exactly the conclusion that the series has been leading up to since the beginning. I think the plot of an imposter Aslan and the effect it would have on Narnians is cool. And much like the book of Revelation, the end of the world is weird, confusing, and dark as fuck considering this is a children’s book. He invokes an amazing sense of fear and sadness, considering we just saw the birth of Narnia in the last book. And I am one of the people who loved the last few pages. It was an interesting take on heaven, theology, and the questions of “is Aslan also Tash? Is one religion better? Are all gods the same?” are dealt with very well considering that was one of the most problematic aspects of the book. I love literally all the characters you can think of reuniting in the end...except for Susan. I will say, Susan no longer being a friend of Narnia was led up to throughout the other books, and I think what Polly says about her wanting to be grown up rings true...in a sense. What we really need is a new series for Susan where she becomes a friend of Narnia again and gets her happy ending, rather than just “oh look makeup, guess I can’t be in Narnia anymore.” AND YET Lewis finally abandoned the idea of “girls shouldn’t be fighting” and made Jill a super secret ninja spy/badass archer warrior woman. So...I can’t even say it’s as sexist as the other books. There’s also a male talking unicorn who is best friends with the current king...and it kind of seems like they have a thing for each other...so there’s that.

Some people are angry that it is so religiously based and the allegories are so in your face, but at this point if you're reading the Chronicles of Narnia and are upset that there's religion in it, I don't know what to tell you. Truthfully, I thought he did the allegory for the church controlling the population very well, and the idea judgement based on whether you actively hate Aslan instead of being about how you’re either a good or bad person was so cool and different. But honestly, I just don't know what to feel. I'm happy for the characters in the end...I liked the overall idea of this final book...but man it can be super uncomfortable to the point that I don’t even want to rate it.

TV Shows!

Kitten Rescuers: Why yes, it is the incredibly wholesome British TV show about the RSPCA going around and rescuing cats from bizarre and/or dangerous situations, like being stuck up chimneys or drain pipes. And yes, it is the purest thing you will ever watch, even with My Roommate is a Cat in the running as the best cat themed show of the year. I don’t care if it seems like a big commercial for the RSPCA sometimes, I just want to see some cute kittens get their happy endings. My only complaint is that there’s only 8 episodes on Netflix, and I’m desperate for more. 100 adorable feline friends/10

Re: Zero Starting Life in Another World: You know, the anime everyone lost their shit over in 2016? The isekai where the main protagonist keeps re-spawning every time he dies in the fantasy world he is magically transported to and does nothing but suffer? But hey it has those two twin maids with the pink and blue hair in it so it’s all fine? That one. The English dub finally released the second half of the show, so I finished it. AND YES THE DUB IS ACTUALLY GOOD! And the show is fine too. But I feel like I sort of...lost the gist of why everything was happening in those last 12 episodes. However, there was a lot to like about this series overall, and yes Rem truly is best girl. I was just more invested in the first half of the series. 8/10

Honorable Mentions

I watched Christopher Robin again...and I still love it.

I read the first volume of the Tsurune light novel. It’s fine, but I liked the anime better.

Shadowhunters is back for its final...half season?

I’m currently watching The Umbrella Academy, and it’s AMAZING! I can’t wait to finish it!

The Masked Singer (U.S version) has finally ended. And now there’s a trashy hole in my heart.

#long post #media madness #oceans 8 #bnha #boku no hero academia #fantastic beasts and where to find them #httyd #lego movie 2 #kitten rescuers #re zero #the chronicles of narnia #the magician's nephew #the last battle #ps i still love you #king of scars #grishaverse #how to train your dragon 2

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