#there’s no specific context because she said it multiple times

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

am i the asshole for not lending my uncle my copy of zelda tears of the kingdom?

i (17f) have two uncles which are relevant to this story, both maternal. they're the oldest and youngest (not sure exactly how old, one is around 30 and the other is in his late 40s/early 50s.)

last year, the older uncle lent me his copy of zelda breath of the wild. this was after about a year and a half of him having it. during that time he made sure i was well aware how difficult and lengthy it was, which was why he couldn't give it to me to play yet. i don't profess to be a gamer or anything- i just enjoy playing videogames, and i didn't really know what the zelda series was at the time, so i kind of just shrugged it off. when he finally did give it to me, it was after i let his kids borrow my personal copy of animal crossing, and he kind of just stuck the cartridge into my hand while i was leaving and insisted i take it.

i was and still am a student, and just didn't have the time to start casually playing until a few months later in the spring, around may. i really enjoyed it and got 75% of the way through by the time summer vacation rolled around, which was when my cousin (his son) started dropping by to ask when i would be giving zelda back. i told him every day for three consecutive days that i would give it back when i was finished, but he was really anxious to start playing because my uncle only lets them have their nintendo switch in the summer. i offered my cousin his selection of any game we had (as we have done multiple times). he said he'd already played all of our games and that a couple of the newer ones my brother had gotten for his birthday were "trashy" and left.

the fourth time he came over he basically stood in the doorway and demanded the zelda game, said it was his dad's, and that he'd give it back when he finished it. my mom scolded him because of his attitude, saying that my uncle mostly just borrows whatever games they want to play from us for up to a year and a half at a time, and we never complain. she told me to go get the game and give it to him, and he started crying and left before i could. my uncle came over ten minutes later to smooth things over and left with botw. he never gave it back and i never got to finish it.

back in around november, my younger uncle, who is unmarried and has no kids, gifted me zelda botw and totk, specifically because he'd heard about what happened with my older uncle. when my older uncle found out at thanksgiving, he asked me to give totk to him. i told him i was busy with college apps and haven't opened it yet and he said it was fine, and that he would play it and give it back in a few days. i refused, saying that i wanted to open my own game when i wasn't busy, and my mom, who was also there, agreed with me and said that i deserved the experience of opening a present and enjoying it on my own time. he tried a few more times to convince me unsuccessfully and eventually relented.

two months ago i opened botw and am making very slow progress on it because i just don't have the time to finish it as quick as i'd like. totk is still in the plastic on my dresser. a few days ago my uncle messaged me asking for totk, and i ignored it. my mom told me just to tell him i already lent it to someone, but today he turned up on my porch while i was waiting to go to school and asked me for it, and in my exasperation i said, "i haven't even opened it yet." he again told me to let HIM open it and that "he'd give it back in three days after finishing it," and just to let him have it. i told him no. and then i told him no several more times. at one point he got annoyed and said, "fine, be like that," and walked away.

some additional context: my uncle is not broke. he makes six figures and has a very good engineering job. he bought a ps5 almost as soon as it came out. he makes the conscious choice not to purchase his own games, i guess because he feels no need to when he could just borrow them from us instead? my family doesn't make a lot of money but my mom saves up so we can have games, usually as birthday or holiday gifts. i have never borrowed a game from him except botw because he doesn't have any to lend. i also feel like if he really wanted zelda totk that bad he could just buy it himself, because he can definitely afford it. my mom, maternal aunt, and cousins (not his kids) are all on my side, and my aunt says that my younger uncle doesn't like my older uncle and would be pissed if i lent them to him. on the other hand i just feel bad for holding out and being difficult because i want to open it on my own time, and i even though i don't like him as a person i still feel guilty for being rude to and pissing him off because he's my mom's oldest sibling.

so, aita for not lending it to him?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[milkyyawns]

one piece headcanons that mean nothing to most people but everything to me

put in no particular order because organizing my brainwaves would take too much energy today

Usopp is the second best cook of the crew, but has 0 gauge for how spicy his food is. he will smile and say its sweet while your mouth is on fire Sanji is very good at braiding hair

Sanji is secretly jealous that Usopp became a hunk over timeskip. He was really huffy over the change for a second before he found out he could lift Usopp with one hand. Sanuso thought on this; Sanji did not mind the view.

Everyone in the crew is funny but Jinbei is declared the funniest due to his ability to always deliver it in the best way possible.

There is a communal baby sling for Chopper, but Robin also made a really pretty one that she doesn't allow anyone else to use. It's not because Chopper WANTS to be in the baby sling(he likes it, tho), its out of convenience sake. Brook is a swinger

Zoro is chronically unable to grow facial hair, in secret he has asked Chopper and Law if there is any remedy. He doesn't have any body hair either. After timeskip Usopp came back with hair all over him, Zoro thought he did SOMETHING to cause this to happen. You can imagine the mortal shame he felt when he asked and Usopp said he shaved every day, and started to like facial hair on him after he got buffer. One time he tried to make a fake beard for himself, it looked terrible so he tried to wipe it off and it wouldn't budge. He went up to Nami and ended up paying 10k berries to keep her silence. Robin makes a habit of picking the other crew mates brains, especially once she opened her shell and whenever a new member joined. When Law appeared it took him avoiding her like the plague to not open up, and after 5 days he had to give in.

Like Luffy, Robin has the ability to figure out what someone needs to hear. Jinbei didn't know this until one day out of nowhere she walks up to him and invites him to relax with her, and she confessed later on in the day he seemed to be having a Rough Time and she wanted to remind him that he can take it easy when his brain is bothering him, and beyond that he can vocalize the thoughts and get them out of his brain. They have weekly self care nights together because of this and slowly the entire crew ends up joining. Luffy is very very creepy, but only to Sanji specifically. Luffy has decided its a game to try to get into the kitchen so he hides on the ceiling and crawls very slowly. Sanji catches him every time but the first few times it scared the shit out of him (he will never admit that, however.)

Robin is as much of a pervert as Franky, but it's a dialogue you have to unlock with her because she refuses to make people uncomfortable. Once you do, every once in a while a pair of lips appear next to your ear and say the freakiest joke imaginable. Nami will break out laughing in the middle of conversations because of it

Robin says the freakiest shit imaginable. theres no context to this shes just offputting.

every once in a while when Nami is feeling homesick, she intrusts Sanji with a orange based recipe from her mother. Sanji collects all of them and makes them when she thinks shes having a bad day. when she requests it to be made its special and they use HER fresh oranges, which she usually only hands over in small amounts. Nami can only make sweets and fruit based dishes. She usually stole her way into a good meal instead of cooking for herself.

Usopp has gone up to every single member of the crew and made multiple portraits for lost loved ones. It's like an initiations ceremony when he walks up with his sketchbook and sits down a new crew mate and starts asking questions. Everybody was very warmed by this but Brook specifically wrote an entire song because of how moved by this action he was.

Nobody will tell Luffy what vore is. They are scared he will start doing it. Usopp is to blame for him knowing that vore is a thing and nobody will let him live it down. (not sexual, obviously)

instead of what most fics do with Sanji being internally homophobic, my personal opinion is that hes actually terrified of hurting the other person. Its not that he doesnt want to be gay, its that he doesnt know how to show love as a man to another man. (For sanuso fans; Sanji confides in Usopp on this matter, and Usopp says in the most matter of fact way. "I dont know how to date anybody. Isnt the point of dating to figure out how each other love? What does gender have to do with it?" and it absolutely broke his brain, and healed something within himself. i lightly touch this in my sanusoami fic !)

Usopp makes gadgets on any occasion. If he hears you complain about the smallest thing once he will somehow make an item to fix that tiny little issue.

Sanji used to shave his legs until one day he overhears Nami say leghair is sexy, he to this day does not know that the context was her talking about Vivi and her's last night together. turns out the weird irritating feeling he had was him hating bare skin against his pants when fighting, and he never went back "Big Man" is Choppers formal nickname. Zoro calls him little man sometimes too but no one else does. Zoro can't read. (i know im not the only one who thinks this) Robin spies on the crew unless shes asleep when they're on the sunny. only Franky has caught on that she does it. she claims that its for security (which he doesn't deny is part of it) but he's convinced it's to slowly torture everybody in the most passive way possible. exhibit a: if she finds out something embarrassing she will almost talk about it for a week straight

i had an entire mental health thing i wanted to get into but i broke the limit halfway through. will do another post with it soon

#one piece #sanji #usopp #robin #franky #jinbei #brook #chopper #nami #luffy #law #monkey d. luffy #nico robin #headcanon #vivi #vivi nefertari

[lu-is-not-ok]

horrid thought i had: if your theory on k corp hong lu being semi-conscious during stasis is right, does that not mirror carmen during lobotomy corporation?

...

Wait. Hold on. Wait. Wait hold on.

Ok, so here's the thing: For a while now I've already had a suspicion that Hong Lu's deal is like, way more important than he lets on.

This might sound like a conspiracy Game Theory Matpat rant, but here me out.

First of all, Hong Lu has this weird tendency to break patterns in much less obvious ways than the other suspicious Sinners, to the point it's been driving me insane?

Like.

Okay.

First.

Remember those promo PVs of each Sinner? And how each of them ended on a glimpse of their trauma and All of them either directly referenced a potentially traumatic event or had the Sinner sound distraught? Except for Hong Lu, who doesn't sound in any way distressed like the others did, and then after the game logo is revealed he asks if something he said was weird.

Like, sure, it does make sense for him to say that in context of what he says during that video, but isn't it so fucking weird that the one Sinner with a section in his promo that seems slightly off is also the one who asks if anything he said during that section was weird?

Second.

You know those intro segments during the prologue, that are also on the official limbuscompany.com website? The ones that offer managerial instructions for each Sinner?

Pay close attention to those. For every Sinner, these instructions specify how to deal with that specific Sinner's eccentricities.

Don't show Gregor your disgust. Wait for Rodya's bad mood to pass. Give Sinclair positive reinforcement. Wait patiently for Yi Sang to finish thinking. Look Ishmael's way for sound advice, but don't break her trust. Understand Heathcliff is simple-minded and contact HR if he causes problems. Play along with Don's Fixer act. Don't make Ryoshu breed personal resentment towards you. Give clear and concise commands to Meursault. Give Outis short replies of agreement but keep an eye on her. Simply nod and get it over with when conversing with Faust.

...But then there's Hong Lu's. Which says nothing how to deal with his eccentricities, but rather to not let Other Sinners get physical with him over them. It's not about keeping him in line, it's about keeping other people's reactions to him in line.

I want to note this especially because several other Sinners break patterns in their introductions as well. Meursault's is one sentence. Ryoshu and Outis have a warning. Don Quixote's particulars include a [REDACTED] on the website. Faust's directly asks the manager to fuck around and find out. However, the way Hong Lu's intro instructions break the pattern is the most subtle out of all of them, to the point I genuinely did not realize that was the case until I had read all of them over multiple times.

Third.

Hong Lu's Base E.G.O animation. If you watch all of the Base E.G.O animations in a row, you'll notice that for all of them, the Sinners start already in frame... Except for Hong Lu, who visibly jumps into the frame from off-screen.

Now, you could argue that, technically, Don runs into her animation from off-screen as well, however I think there is a bit of a difference here. Don's animation is too quick to see her actually run in. We see she's not there for maybe a frame, before she pops with an animation that implies she had just run in and needs to break her momentum. This is unlike Hong Lu's, whom we Actively See descend from Off-Screen.

Now, I know what some of you may be thinking.

That I am coping. That these are coincidences. That I'm looking too deeply into things.

However. Here's a connection that I just recently realized, that has been Fucking Me Up.

Mild spoilers for Canto IV and like the first two chapters or so of Dream of the Red Chamber, if anyone cares.

You know how Limbus Company has this... fixation on stars? There's the whole thing with Dante following a star, stars granting wishes, people turning into weird beings from wishing to be stars, and there's this general connection to the sky and space because of Demian also doubling as a reference to The Little Prince.

And then something weird hit me.

See, Dream of the Red Chamber starts with a bit of a backstory to the jade that would later be reincarnated into Bao-yu. You see, it was one of the many stones used by a godess to create the sky. However, this one specific jadestone ended up being the only one not used in that creation, which then led to it feeling horrible about itself, which then led to a monk and a taoist deciding to have that stone reincarnate as a human and live through a human life, kickstarting the rest of the novel.

I'm like, heavily simplifying this, but that's the gist of how that whole thing starts.

Which. Made me think. A jadestone that was part of the ones meant to build the sky, but ended up being left unused. The sky. Stars. Hong Lu being seemingly named after the jade rather than Bao-yu directly.

Holy shit there's no way they won't reference this in some way, right? Right?

So, now imagine me, at my fucking wit's end, having the biggest crackpot theory brewing in my mind.

And you send this ask comparing K Corp Hong Lu to Carmen.

I am going insane.

#limbus company #limbus company project moon #hong lu #hong lu lcb #lcb analysis #lcb speculation #lcb canto iv #lcb spoilers #ask #mulberriesandtea #lu speaketh #no i'm not normal thanks for asking

[bookofmirth]

On every character sarah writes having the same personality: why does every main girl have to be this big planner who has multiple plans on backup and never tells people, only to surprise everyone when everything goes right at the end with no prior explanation... idk if I'm putting this right, but it just made me very... annoyed

Like yeah, that worked great with Aelin, sure, but for me it just doesn't fit with Bryce? Especially on how she was just thrown at this and suddenly figured out she was The Chosen One(tm). It really bugged me, idk

Fair warning, this post rips Bryce a new asshole - not as a person, but as a character that sjm created. So I'm putting it under the cut.

Just to start, in context I said that all the hofas characters ended up having the same personality - though you can make a case for her reusing a lot of the same descriptions and such for all of them. ANYWAY...

To me, the issue is not just that Bryce keeps doing things behind the scenes that we never get any hint of, it's a bigger issue that we never get a hint that she even gives a shit.

With Aelin, at least we already knew what she was working towards and why. We already knew what she cared about and how far she was willing to go to get it. Aelin caring about Terrasen and her court and saving the people she loved was never in question. Her trauma from finding her parents dead, her fear at losing the rest of the people she loved, the weight of responsibility that she felt, we knew all of those things pretty much from the get-go. Her tendency to shut people out could be considered a flaw because she didn't trust other people to help her. We don't know about Terrasen right away, and tbh I don't remember what history we get instead and so I need to reread, but I can point to very specific values, goals, and motivations that make Aelin act the way that she does.

But Bryce - the central problem with her as a character is that Bryce doesn't care about anything, and sjm never figured out what she cares about, either.

Characters need to have central things that they care about, that drive them, motivations, things that they fear and things they would go to great lengths to protect. They need flaws, and clear relationships to the world around them. I could make a list of those things for a lot of her characters. Not all, but most.

With Bryce, I have NO IDEA what those things are. That makes it so that when she randomly find Emile, it just seems like she did it to come across like a nice person. She doesn't care about what humans are experiencing, she shits on Vanir/fae all the time, she treats Hunt pretty poorly, she isn't close to Juniper or Fury (see: their near disappearance from hofas), Danika kept so many secrets from her that I seriously doubt the depth of their relationship. Bryce was working in that library museum thing for Jesiba (I'm already erasing the series from my memory oh my god) and going out and partying and that was all well and good, but... was she going to do those things when she's 200, too? I'm not even saying that she needs to like, go get married or whatever, but she literally has no goals in life!

SJM saying that Bryce is the fun, cute party girl who also has a deep, intellectual side, a pretty woman who can also kick ass, okay, but she needs a reason to kick ass. SJM completely forgot to include the second half of that equation, which is ironic since that was a big point of her character - to prove that women can be feminine and strong, wear high heels and be smart. She failed miserably in my opinion, if that really was the goal of Bryce's character.

When Aelin is snarky to people, I know why. When Bryce is a bitch, it comes out of nowhere and is often turned on people who actually deserve her time and attention and empathy (e.g. Sathia). Aelin is an asshole to that one dude whose name starts with a D because he's a man who is underestimating her and wants to refuse to let her lead because he assumes she will be bad at it. When Bryce is an asshole to Sathia, WHY. I mean really, I wanted to throw my book across the fucking page!!!! Because that's a perfect example of how, if Bryce was guided by a set of values (feminism, I guess?) then she would have responded very differently to Sathia, who has experienced literally the exact same thing Bryce has (being betrothed to someone against her will). Instead, Bryce throws that line back in her face about "well I never let that stop me" as if what Sathia has experienced is her own fault for... not trying enough??? PLEASE. ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW.

The whole "girlboss" thing needs.... something driving it. You can't just bulldoze people and call it being empowered. And I think that sjm has really, really simplified gender and sexuality in CC to the point that that's really the only distinction that matters. That's maybe another issue. I just have a lot of thoughts about these things lol.

Anyway. This is what happens when you write a character built on aesthetic and #girlpower, rather than making them a complete person with fears and values and joys and goals and motivations and flaws.

Okay one more point, this is NOT beyond sjm's capabilities. She obviously is much better at writing characters than this. I just think that sometimes, something suffers when you try new things. In CC, sjm was giving actual world building and magic systems a go. And the characters, really, REALLY fucking suffered for it.

#sjm critical #hofas #hofas spoilers #spoilers #house of flame and shadow spoilers #anti bryce #using that tag for the first time ever but oh my god #I don't plan on harping on this topic a lot #it's just... #definitely been on my mind #ask #anon

[project-sekai-facts]

okay i just had a lore meltdown in a reblog so i need chat's opinion

are this-reality vocalops real for project sekai characters? like, could rui be canonically a hitoyama/mothy fan? and most importantly - are the commissions we get actually the same as the ones written during the stories? because it's often implied that they are, especially with leo/need (and made-to-order specifically i guess??) but then what.

sorry but trying to fit jackpot sad girl's lyrics into a context that it's written by kanade keeps me up at night why is this teenage girl beefing with hachi all of the sudden

ALSO if you consider whatever the fuck the evillous collab was does this imply that producers can get their personal sekais. and not be aware of their existence. OR ARE THEY? WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON WITH "SEKAIS BASED ON MEMORIES" AND WHY WAS THIS NEVER BROUGHT UP AGAIN I NEED ANSWERS

^ is painfully aware that there could be a very simple explanation but loves to overcomplicate stupid things

Yes, Vocaloid-Ps exist in-universe! Ichika is sorta one since she owns a Miku voicebank and is learning how to use it. Also I shit you not, it's heavily implied that Rui is a fan of those guys. He mentions liking how Vocaloid can be used to tell stories in KAITO's 1* story.

Any song that the characters write in a story is not the same as the commission for the event. If you play the story with music the songs written are always played at some point and they're just OST. Although it may at first seem like Order Made and Utsuro wo Aogu are the songs written by Ichika and Toya within their respective events, when their songs are played in the story, they're actually Count Your Blessings and Step by Step. Order Made is canon though, since it's performed in virtual lives. As I said, commissioned songs that are performed in virtual lives are canon but were likely created by the SEKAI (since they aren't treated as covers, and it's not like vocaloPs are producing songs for teenagers in a pocket dimension).

Jackpot Sad Girl doesn't exist in-universe (possibly, not sure how canon the connect lives are). The song Kanade wrote in Captive Marionette is actually called Marionette, and is never played during the story.

Remember I wrote that really long post about SEKAI lore and then just slapped on the end that they're a metaphor for worldbuilding in music? That's how I'm explaning the Evillious SEKAI. Hey, if the vocaloid characters can manifest into existence then characters based on those characters can also manifest into existence too I guess.

All the VocaloPs that we know canonically exist are:

EasyPop (Happy Synthesizer is played multiple times)

Giga (Rettou Joutou is played multiple times, and the An/Akito GimmexGimme archive is canon. Also drop pop candy cover)

Orangestar (Vivids Asu no Yozora Shoukaihan archive, Kaisei cover)

Eve (BAD DOGS Dramaturgy archive, Oki ni Mesu mama cover)

Surii (Kohane/Toya Junky Night Town Orchestra archive, Ego Rock cover)

takamatt (BAD DOGS TOKIO FUNKA archive)

noripy (Vivids Migikata no Chou archive)

iroha(sasaki) (Kohane/Akito Roshin Yuukai archive)

n-buna (An/Toya Yoake to Hotaru archive, Umiyuri Kaiteitan cover, Meru cover)

and every producer of a cover song which has a 3DMV and has been performed in a Virtual Live. This includes (with their song(s) in brackets):

MikitoP (ROKI, Shoujorei, Yī Èr Fanclub)

Junky (Sweet Magic)

Sasanomaly (Jishou Mushoku)

Natsushiro Takaaki (Near)

nulut (Fragile)

toa (Tsugihagi Staccato)

Harumaki Gohan (Melty Land Nightmare)

koyori (Hitorinbo Envy)

Omoi (Teo)

Hinata Electric Works (Buriki no Dance)

164 (Time Machine)

40mP (Time Machine)

balloon (Charles)

Kurage-P/Wada Takeaki (Chururira Chururira Daddadda!)

doriko (Romeo to Cinderella)

syudou (Bitter Choco Decoration)

NayutalieN (Dance Robot Dance)

Kitani Tatsuya (Akuma no Odorikata)

Fujiwara Motoo/the band BUMP OF CHICKEN (ray)

Neru (Lost One no Goukoku)

Umetora (Ifuudoudou)

Yunosuke (PaIII.SENSATION)

Teniwoha (Villain)

sasakure.UK (Lost and Found)

DECO*27 (Vampire)

JIN (Children Record)

Pinnochio-P (Non-Breath Oblige)

rerulili (Kami no Manimani)

Kikuo (Aishite Aishite Aishite)

Hachioji-P (Kimagure Mercy)

Hayashi Kei (Hello, Worker)

Hiiragi Kirai (Love ka?)

(Ikanaide, Karakuri Pierrot, Egoist, Okochama Sensou, glow, Totemo Suteki na Rokugatsu Deshita, Nounai Kakumei Girl, Shiroi Yuki no Princess wa, Sukina Koto Dake de Ii Desu, Akuyaku ni Kiss Scene o have not been performed in a vlive yet)

Additionally

All the producers listed here (though, this is debatable since it was handled externally)

Presumably all the producers of the vsinger 3DMVs that aren't already listed above (Livetune, Re:nG, SLAVE.V-V-R, JimmyThumb-P)

And any lyricists/arrangers not listed above (q*left, Rockwell, REOL, etc)

Possibly mothy, Hitoshizuku-P, yama (based on Rui's reference to storytelling with Vocaloid and these being the most famous for doing so thus most likely to be the subject of the reference)

#asks #lore

[taylortruther]

That NYT piece is unhinged, and it will make the Kaylors feel like the New York Times agrees with them. Why can’t they just stan genuinely gay artists, not a woman who has only publicly dated men, and who has said this speculation makes her uncomfortable?

i think it's okay that the ny times wants to post opinion pieces like this - like it or not, taylor's sexual identity is a hot topic and has been one for years now, and the interest around it does speak to our societal concerns!

but i think this article in particular pushes a lot of thoughts that i have to challenge whenever i see them. primarily, that songs about fear or yearning in love are exclusively queer topics, and that a woman couldn't feel specific ways around a man. when it comes to taylor specifically, this article (and many similar ones) neglects to mention that she feels fear and trapped because she's felt hunted (by the media, "hunters with cellphones") every time she leaves the house. she's described men in her life being uncomfortable with her security or being seen with her or associated with her. she explicitly stated multiple times in her music and in miss americana that she found happiness with joe because it was happiness without outside input, and she had to unlearn an entire belief system (that she needed to be good and liked) in order to find security again.

i always understood why queer people saw themselves in her music. because fearing being "found out," needing secrecy, having to hide what you truly mean, is a completely relatable queer experience in a world that is so unfriendly to us. the writer touches on this at the beginning, too, with chely wright saying a huge star would need to come out in order to truly break up the status quo, and by saying that queer readings (even if they're "wrong") are necessary to normalize equality... but i think not diving deeper neglects a critical piece of this discussion. taylor's anxieties about fame and love are necessary to understanding her work, with or without the queer lens.

also, i think it's just glib sexism that makes people think that her tender love songs couldn't be written by a man. i don't know why the author thinks inthaf and hits different can ONLY be about women because nothing in them is gendered. maroon, sure, the line about lips is titillatingly questionable. but some gaylors have also said this about cardigan (men don't dance!), or treacherous (men don't use their hands in sex!), or so it goes (there's definitely not an extremely well-known sex act called a pearl necklace absolutely not) and like... even if taylor was a gold star lesbian, and wrote those songs about women, they still... could easily apply... to one's experiences with men...

idk like i hate this idea that queer people and straight people experience love in completely different ways. YES, societal/historical context changes how we experience the world. but we are still the same species. we still experience heartbreak and yearning and fear and joy and love and peace with people.

#this was rant #hot taykes

[wanderingsorcerer]

How do you find sigils and enns for less known daemons?

W.S. on Demonolatry for Lesser Known Demons 18+

This is a question with multiple answers some simple and some that require years of academic study.

I recommend reading the Complete Book Of Demonolatry by S.Connolly, she goes into depth on the historical aspects of demonolatry and the reconstruction done by modern practitioners. This is 18+ and has many adult themes but is a good book on ceremonial magick to learn from.

Where are all the sigils at?

It is almost impossible to find a sigil for every demon you will read about, that being said, like many of the practitioners from days past. You as the adept have the power to create your own, so long as you have the aptitude for it that is.

People in the past divined the sigils through Scrying mirrors, going into trance like states, allowing the demon to channel energy through the magicians hand and draw the sigil, or through trial and error with summonings.

Are Demons Even "Demons"

A lot of the time the demons that you are looking into have origins inside other cultures, including the Djinn of the middle east, and many of the worshipped gods of the pre christian world.

Even Baphomet a popular "demonic" energy that many modern practitioners work with was actually a misspelling. During the trial of some of the Knights Templars Baphomet was scribed during their hearing, as who the Templars worshipped after their time in the middle east.

However it is now understood that what they were attempting to write was Muhammad , The prophet Muhammad to be exact. The Christian templars went into the middle east and came back, following the religion of Islam.

All that to say, are demons even really demons?

Well yes and no, it stems from personal belief, I'm of the walk of life that states all religions and all gods and demons are real because people believe they are.

So how do I make invocations and sigils and be respectful?

When working with these spirits it is important to note their original historical context as well as their modern connotation associated with the names and energies.

Meaning, the invocations and workings you create should both respect the spirit culturally, and respect their current role in whatever hierarchy society associates them with.

All that being said, so long as you believe in your practice and treat these spirits with respect then you will be able to establish a new sigil for them. Even for well known demons, personalizing the symbols can make the bond grow stronger.

It's what many adepts do to this day, the more personal the sigil is to the magician the more power one can give towards invoking the demon.

So What about Enns?

The first published mention of Enns, at least to my knowledge, stems from S.Connolly herself. The use of invocations and spiritual prayers has been around for thousands of years but specifically the Term Enns has no historical basis outside of what S.Connolly herself states it has.

And many books on Demonolatry after her, use her books as the basis for their works as well, hence the popularity of Enns in modern Demonolatry Circles Today.

Not to say the practice is inherently bad or incorrect, Connolly has had a major impact on demonolatry as a whole since the early 2000s and I personally believe her works are worth the read.

All that being said feel free to create your own Enns or Invocations.

Similar to how the sigils are made more powerful by having a personal connection to you. So will the Enns you create:)

In my opinion as long as it works and you're being respectful then go for it.

Take a step back and read every occult work with a grain of salt, never take any occult works as fact, or as the answer to your prayers. Not all of these books will be everyone's cup of tea, take what resonates with you from these books and leave behind anything you don't like.

☕If You Love My Blog Consider Buying Me A Ko-Fi☕ 😊

Other readings include

Complete Book Of Demonolatry by S.Connolly

The Daemonolater’s Guide To Daemonic Magick by S.Connolly

Daemonolatry Goetia by S.Connolly Kasdeya Rite Of Ba’al by S.Connolly

Honoring Death: The Arte of Daemonolatry Necromancy by S.Connolly

Goetic Demonolatry by Ellen Purswell

Demonolatry Blends by J.Thorp

Walking the Hidden Path:A book on demonic magick by J.Thorp

Demon Stones by J.Thorp

Complete Book of Demonolatry Magic by J.Thorp

Divining & Speaking With Daemons: A Practical Guide by J.Thorp

Demonolatry Rites collected and edited by S.Connoly

Sanctus Quattuordecim by M.Delaney Demonolatry by Nicholas Remy

Daemonic Magick by Seleneicthon

#occult #occultism #occultist #demons #ars goetia #solomonic magick #magick #witchcraft #folklore #folklorist #magi #magus #grimoire #grimoires #witch #witchblr #witches #witchythings #witchlife #pagan witch #WanderingSorcerer #herbalist #plants and herbs #herbology #herbalism #goetia demon #demonolatry #goetia #demonologist #demon

[desceros]

Re: ableism w/Symphony Donnie: Definitely some internalized ableism but I think that’s unfortunately due to not many people knowing what exactly neurodivergence looks like and how people with it processes things differently.

Like, honestly, my biggest gripe was the recording and even that, for the SPECIFIC context of this story and Donnie as a character, it makes sense. Does it make it right? No, but if Donnie never had to think about these things before, for him it’s the same as recording everything to protect his family. Just something he does.

Also, even though my heart broke with Reader’s at her realization, MULTIPLE times reader has said Donnie says what he means and even at the beginning with the “I like you” thing I was like, “Girl, I’m going to need you to define the relationship with him.”

And I think, with Leo, even when writer’s do write him as neurodivergent, what I’ve read always has him as the he better masker whether it’s explicitly said or not. Idk if Symphony Leo is neurodivergent or not but STILL, reader has picked up that he’s good with masking which usually comes off as charming or “easy breezy beautiful cover girl”.

Idk, maybe because I know a lot of people like Donnie irl but if anything I was more frustrated at the obvious miscommunication between both of them than him directly, because as reader said, she projected her feelings on to him when he’s been super direct with his intentions.

Basically, there are sometimes where I wish people would just realize that processing the same thing between two people doesn’t always look the same and that one isn’t necessarily bad.

well-said, anon-chan!

edit: this got SPOILER!! HEAVY!! for chap. 22 and also soooo long so i'm going to tuck it under a cut. but here's some meta on symphony to explore this a bit since it's something that's very important to me and also... pretty critical to the fic itself! i don't typically like explaining myself outside of the text and letting the fic itself speak but. hm. i suppose i shall let it slide for today!

as you all have hopefully noticed by now, as an author, i like to be. hm. more subtle with things. i prefer to tuck things away versus having things be blatant in the text. and this is kind of coming back to bite me a little with donnie and his neurodivergence, i suspect.

i've tried pretty hard to make it contextually obvious that donnie's autistic. i've all but used the word. the way he behaves and communicates is heavily autism-coded.

meanwhile, the story is from viola-chan's pov, and she's neurotypical-coded (well. as much as i, an adhd-riddled autistic cat in a trenchcoat can manage).

as a result, she doesn't... pick up on donnie's problems with communication. not right away. but here, in this chapter, we see where she finally figures out what their issue has been the entire time:

…Oh. Oh god.  He really doesn’t get it. You’d known, of course, that Donnie wasn’t great with people. That he doesn’t communicate well. He doesn’t pick up on cues, or use them himself. No wonder he’s always so frank in his language, you realize. No wonder he’s so comforted by the firm rigidities of science. No wonder he looked so lost. No wonder he was so perplexed.

then, she puts that into practice by being specific and precise with how she talks. and we see that she now knows how to communicate with him in a way that works for both of them. and it works for them:

God; it’s like—a breath of fresh air, you think, staring at him in a little bit of awe. It’s so easy to talk to him, now that you’re just… letting it all out. Being honest. Frank. Infuriating that you hadn’t done this earlier. Feeling your irritation deflate, you nod. “…Okay. You just—need an explanation. Clarification.” “Yes, please,” Donnie gushes, fretting a little.

it's going to take some work. she still takes things he says personally and extrapolates past them (the whole "leo being an important person" thing). but she immediately nips it in the bud and is like. no. we're not doing that anymore. so, going forward, her relationship with donnie is one that's built on learning how to develop this open communication.

of course, it's not perfect, because they're human. donnie twisting her arm into still talking to him by calling in the favor is shitty behavior. a desperate bid to keep someone close that, for some reason, he can't imagine being without. not cool. the recordings of them having sex were shitty behavior to us, people who Know Better. but when violist-chan said 'hey, that's not cool, don't do that' and donnie was given a reason why not to, he just says ok. he might not understand ("but i record everything"). but he acknowledges that there's a concern there, and he agrees to be more conscientious in the future (having a consent sheet).

now then, let's look at leo's behavior in comparison.

donnie's biggest fault was that he didn't know to check in and make sure they were on the same page with everything. leo's fault, on the other hand, is purposeful, manipulative, and cruel. his open admission that he's been manipulating her from the beginning. manipulating donnie. lying to her.

to me, this is much, much worse than what donnie did. even knowing that at some point he starts developing friendly feelings towards her—and some of their interactions were indeed genuine!—i'm with violist-chan here. i'm not going to be digging through every one trying to parse out which ones were real and which ones were him being a dickhead. they're all tainted by the stain of betrayal.

also. because it has come up in a different ask that i will be publishing probably tomorrow bc of spoiler reasons: someone said something to the effect of 'why didn't he just not say anything? he could have taken that to his grave. how selfish'. i will remind you of a conversation between violist-chan and leo that happened in the previous chapter:

“Most of all, he’s honest,” you keep going, tangling your fingers together, staring down at the way they knot at your waist. “If he says something, I can take it at face value. There’s no hidden meaning. Nothing deeper. If he says something feels good, I know it feels good. If he says he likes something, he likes it. If he doesn’t like it, he doesn’t like it. If he asks for something, I don’t need to ask if he’s sure. He asks, so he’s sure. It—It’s a breath of fresh air. If I want to know what he’s thinking, really thinking, all I have to do is ask. And...”  [...] Leo’s still as stone for a few moments longer, looking at you like he’s trying to decide if he wants to say something; but finally he relaxes and comes back to you himself. Reaching out, he flicks your forehead, causing you to wince and rub at it.

i think... leo maybe wouldn't have ever said anything about it. but then you said this. how donnie matters to you because he's honest. there's nothing deeper with him. it's all at face value. you never have to worry about what he's doing, what he's thinking. and that i think... really messed with leo. because he knows he hasn't been honest with you. you can't trust what he says at face value. you do have to worry about what he's doing. and for you to say that that's the main thing you love about donnie—it messed with him. so, even though he knew it would jeapordize the relationship with you, even knowing he wanted to put this off for as long as he could, even though, even though, he decides he has to tell you. he has to come clean.

so even though it feels like shitty, selfish behavior... it's actually him trying to do right by her for a change. to conform to what she looks for in a relationship (both romantic and platonic). it just... didn't go over so well, predictably. most people don't like hearing that not one, but two of their most precious relationships were built on a foundation of misunderstandings or lies.

side note. i do headcanon leo as having adhd that primarily manifests itself as an inattentive form. i don't suspect it has much to do with his behavior here... save perhaps for some possible rsd being triggered when violist-chan is like 'ok actually go fuck yourself i'm out of here.' i don't find it particularly relevant to the discussion of ableism, in this context.

so anyway. long post aside. it's... interesting to me. to see people saying 'actually fuck both donnie and leo equally!!! bleh bleh bleh!!!!' i don't know that it's. hm. active ableism. i'm certainly not accusing anyone of the sort. but it is, at the very least, indicative to me that there are a lot of people who don't read into the text as deeply as perhaps i would like on certain character traits, if i had a magic wand to wave.

....and also perhaps just ableism, haha.

#ask tag #symphony tag #rare desceros meta post #symphony meta

[fiercynn]

former otw board candidate's attempted take-down of a volunteer of color is cruel. and racist!

so if you’ve been following along with the discussions about racism in the organization for transformative works (otw) and everything that’s gone on just this week, you may have seen that @yishaqeni (he/they) - a former otw board candidate who withdrew from the election in late june (not audrey r, the republican) - wrote a post two days ago saying that the actions of dhobikikutti (not sure of pronouns), a volunteer of color who has been calling out racism in the otw, are a large part of what led yishaqeni to withdraw from the election and the organization. you can read yishaqeni’s full post here.

i'm going to go ahead and try to address yishaqeni’s accusations towards kutti here as i understand them. (i'm choosing not to respond to yishaqeni’s follow-up post on this topic because kutti has said that yishaqeni has confused kutti with another volunteer of color in at least one of his accusations in that second post, and i do not know which accusation that is, so i am not engaging with that post for now.)

firstly, some context on my perspective: i am not an otw volunteer, nor do i have any other inside perspective on otw as an organization. i do not personally know dhobikikutti, yishaqeni, alex tischer, azarias, nor any of the other board members or committee chairs who have been in leadership between 2020 and now. all of my understanding of these situations comes from what has been shared publicly by people who do have inside knowledge. 

as an outsider, i have read and reread all of the public posts that kutti has made multiple times. i’ve also read all of the discussions documented by synonymous, including stuff that happened on fail_fandomanon (ffa). i obviously may be missing stuff that happened internally, but going off of what i’ve seen all of these folks say, including yishaqeni, here are my reactions to yishaqeni’s accusations.

yishaqeni's accusation #1: “dhobi ki kutti herself had began posting internal information to her personal dreamwidth and sending this information to other DW users without considering if the people she was posting about were identifiable” and “dhobi ki kutti has made it clear that she does not care about the privacy of other volunteers so long as she can use statements to discuss structural racism in the org”

firstly, let’s be clear: until kutti received their first warning for constructive corrective action procedure (ccap) from the otw tag wrangling chairs and board, what kutti posted publicly were the emails and comments that kutti themselves sent to otw leadership. kutti also notes that the only quotes kutti includes are from official statements made by the board and chairs to all volunteers, nothing from private conversations:

I reject a cultist confidentiality policy that denies volunteers any opportunity to provide citations to back up claims of abusive organisational practises. The only quotes I have publicly posted are from official statements made by the Board and Chairs to all volunteers, and I shared them in response to a post where the official organisation statement was denying an accusation of insufficiently protecting its volunteer base. As a member of said volunteer base, I have the right to provide proof of my own experience. [x]

i'll go even further and say that except for one circumstance that i'll talk about below, kutti’s comments do not include information specific enough to people or events that could identify them or violate people’s privacy. perhaps if you are an otw volunteer who saw these conversations go on internally, they seem like they give identifiable information, but as someone from the outside, they do not.

the one exception is the question that kutti asked in the july 3 board meeting about documented racism by board member alex tischer (pronouns listed as "IDGAF"). i attended that board meeting, and at the time i had already seen discussion of alex on fail_fandomanon, where alex’s racist actions have been documented. this matters because alex has held multiple leadership positions at otw: alex was a board member from 2016-2018 and again from 2020-2023 until their resignation three days ago on july 27, 2023; and as far as we know, alex is still the chair of the webs committee [here's an archived link on july 30, 2023 in case that changes soon].

i'll emphasize kutti’s point here about volunteers needing to be able to provide citations of abusive organizational practices. when people like alex with this level of power have been allowed to get away with blatant racism and anti-blackness over years within the organization, there is often no other recourse than the name them publicly to decry their actions – especially when other information about those people has already been leaked on ffa! targeting kutti for this is ridiculous and racist, especially when yishaqeni themselves admits that volunteers of color who were asking for answers were being stonewalled by the board and leadership.

after kutti received the ccap email, kutti did also post that publicly, because the ccap email itself is such a blatantly racist threat on otw leadership’s part that it, in my opinion, absolutely needed to be shared, for the same reasons as above.

yishaqeni's accusation #2: “dhobi ki kutti began posting her questions a few weeks before i left. these were questions we were already asking - progress on the 2020 pledge, the treatment of azarias, PAC, POCvols and cvols, etc. however, this also included posts that were deliberately inflammatory, where she would refer to actions she disagreed with with provocative descriptors such as  'disgusting'…” 

i, personally, think it’s perfectly legitimate to talk about any of otw’s horrible actions listed here as “disgusting”, including to talk about racism, but kutti has revealed that that’s not actually where kutti even used this term. kutti used it to talk about the way former otw volunteer azarias was treated in the CSEM work azarias had to do: 

And @ board? On a personal level - finding out what you took the responsibility to ask azarias to do, that the board and the Legal advisors of the board told her it was her job to not delete the content that a CSEM distributing user had created, but that she was supposed to comb through it all to only remove the bits that were illegal - that disgusts me. The fact that you all think this is an acceptable thing to ask of anyone disgusts me. What is it going to take to shake you out of your inaction here? [x]

still think it’s provocative to use the word “disgusts” in that context? yishaqeni, you should be ashamed of how you’ve characterized this.

yishaqeni's accusation #3: “[kutti] was deliberately antagonizing and intimidating to others in the internal chat, particularly when she felt other vols weren't engaging with what she was posting”

having been in many, many situations where calling out racism is met by silence, i can’t tell you how frustrating and demoralizing it is to see people continue to engage with “easier” topics in other channels but deliberately choose not to respond about racism, especially when you know that having more allies in the room could potentially help demand answers from leadership. it’s horrible to feel like you’re shouting in to the void about a topic as important as racism and harassment.

so if you’re going to give the volunteers who didn’t respond grace and understanding for not knowing what to say, you should also give that grace and understanding to kutti for being frustrated at having to tackle these topics alone. racism and mistreatment of volunteers are the things that should cause discomfort, not the person calling them out.

yishaqeni's accusation #4: “dhobi ki kutti mocked those who were stressed and uncomfortable by how she was posting in her ccap responsa”

let's take a look at what kutti actually said in that ccap response:

Because, as the CCAP makes a point to reiterate, this is cumulative action being taken for everything I have said over the past month. That my comments have made the atmosphere ‘tense’ and ‘unpleasant’. That I have made multiple volunteers feel ‘stressed,’‘disconcerted and unsafe’, to the extent that I have affected their mental well-being. I am not ‘considerate and respectful’ enough to be welcome as a volunteer. I do not plan to invest the energy in theorising this for you, because abusers who file complaints to silence criticism know fully well what patterns of hierarchy and power they are wielding. And here, I will make it clear that I hold the chairs and Board responsible for this CCAP, not any individual volunteers who chose to complain against me. A healthy organisation would have resources to support volunteers feeling threatened by my challenges of the structural whiteness in this organisation without using their discomfort to browbeat me. [x, emphasis mine]

i've bolded the last part of kutti’s statement because kutti makes it clear that this is an organizational failure. kutti explicitly says that kutti does not blame the individuals who felt threatened or uncomfortable, even those who reported kutti for this, which is far more generous than i would be in that circumstance. so how exactly is that “mocking” people who were stressed and uncomfortable? ridiculous.

now i'm going to make some accusations of my own, based on what i've seen here:

deepa’s accusation #1: yishaqeni choosing to focus on kutti in this post is both targeted and racist.

yishaqeni names that there are many reasons he decided to leave the otw and withdraw as a board candidate, including “the constant leaking of internal discussions and comments to FFA and DW, the lack of response from board on the ongoing trashfire, the inability of the board to address structural racism”, as well as kutti’s alleged behavior. yishaqeni then adds that they choose to focus on kutti’s behavior because they think racism in the org has been “analysed to death” already.

that's kind of a wild statement to make, because even if these issues have been analyzed and discussed, those critiques of otw’s dysfunction have clearly not gained enough traction or power for change to have been made within the organization yet. if that is truly a concern of yishaqeni’s, and one so powerful that it led them to leave the org, surely they can still do work to talk about that? since ultimately that is much more impactful than the actions of a single volunteer?

then there’s the ffa leaks. from what i've seen, those are more likely to have been “privacy violations” than anything that kutti has posted, because they often quote directly from otw chats, and they cover topic even more wide-ranging than the racism that kutti has posted about. but kutti is still the person targeted in this post.

i get that with everything going on right now, it can feel unsafe to be an otw volunteer, and to feel like you can’t speak freely in otw channels. but to ascribe that lack of safety to kutti is ridiculous. and given that the main thing kutti’s been talking about publicly is racism, it is racist to target kutti this way.

yishaqeni could have written a post about how organizational culture at otw – including a lack of transparency and action from otw leadership – have contributed to an atmosphere so toxic that it has both led people to feel like they need to leak stuff (and again, not just stuff related to racism), and that volunteers have been made to feel unsafe because of some of those leaks. that’s a valid critique that covers both sides of why this is all really fucked up. 

but yishaqeni chose instead to focus disproportionately on the actions of a single volunteer of color calling out racism, whose “leaks” did not include identifiable information about individuals except for what had been shared with all board and volunteers. wild.

deepa’s accusation #2: yishaqeni is engaging in tone policing, which is also – surprise! – racist.

firstly, let’s look at the language yishaqeni uses to describe how kutti talks about racism: “intentionally inflammatory”, “provocative”, “antagonizing”, “intimidating”, “aggressive[e]”, “incendiary”, and “outside the bounds of normal discourse”. 

i think i just got bingo on a tone policing bingo card. “aggressive” and “intimidating”, in particular, are words that are frequently used to demonize people of color for their justifiable anger about racism, and to make them out to be threats. (i'll be clear too here that this kind of language is not only racist but anti-black, and that black people face disproportionate levels of tone policing, but non-black people of color can still be targeted with this rhetoric.) 

this is all especially ridiculous because yishaqeni acknowledges that no one who was making these critiques was gaining any traction from otw leadership! and yet, yishaqeni also claims that “this could've been campaigned on without the leaking of internal discussions and making vols feel unsafe and stressed”. how, exactly? kutti has been talking about racism within the otw, including going through the “proper channels”, since 2020. people outside of the organization have been talking about this publicly for even longer. how long do those efforts have to fail for people to understand that those “proper channels” are not getting us there?

people of color are allowed to be angry about racism. in fact, everyone should be angry about racism! and the fact is that there is simply no way to talk about racism that will be “acceptable”, because white supremacist culture puts forward that racism itself is what’s acceptable. so saying “kutti should have talked about this differently” is super fucked up. and racist.

deepa’s accusation #3: in their second post, yishaqeni accuses kutti of actions that were done by another volunteer of color. which is racist.

pretty self-explanatory tbh.

deepa's accusation #4: yishaqeni implies that kutti does not understand the risks for volunteers of being subjected to violence for their work in the otw, while not acknowledging that kutti is at high risk for that kind of violence.

for context, kutti is a volunteer from india, which kutti has said publicly.

to quote yishaqeni in full about this topic: 

“the privacy policy is in place to protect vols and she was being incredibly cavalier with what and how she was posting. it’s to protect vols like me who live in countries with a living memory of sectarian and homophobic violence, it’s to protect cvols who live in a country where they can be prosecuted for accessing certain OTW projects, it’s to protect people who could be at risk of harm for engaging with what is widely perceived as queer explicit content.” [x]

as a queer indian-american, i find this extremely condescending and belittling. india has more than a memory of sectarian and homophobic violence; it is a daily reality for many, many marginalized communities there. india's central government, and many of its states, are run by hindu supremacist political parties that actively promote violence towards minorities, including lgbtqia+ folks, women, muslims, dalits and other caste-oppressed communities, adivasis and indigenous communities, disabled people, black people, kashmiris, bengalis, sikhs, other ethnic and religious minorities, and more. india only de-criminalized homosexuality five years ago. 

then there’s also the fact that simply talking about racism in fandom online as a person of color opens you up to harassment, threats, and potentially more, regardless of where you live! 

since i do not know kutti personally, i do not know what kutti specifically has had to face, and i very much hope kutti has been spared from all of what i've talked about above. but there’s absolutely no guarantee of that. and lecturing kutti – who, again, has not violated anyone’s privacy! – of this while not understanding kutti’s own risk as an otw volunteer is also ridiculous.

deepa’s accusation #5: yishaqeni does not himself seem to do much work publicly to speak up about racism in the otw.

as i mentioned above, yishaqeni's post barely pays lip service to the larger issues of racism in the organization. so i looked to see if yishaqeni has been speaking out more broadly to advance anti-racism on his public platforms.

first, i looked at yishaqeni's otw candidate bio and platform from before they withdrew from the race. it does not include any mention of race or racism. so then i scrolled through yishaqeni’s tumblr posts in the past week, and also went ahead and searched his blog for as many relevant terms relevant to fandom racism as i could think of, including "racism", "race", “antiracism" and "anti racism”, “anti-blackness” and “antiblackness”, “sinophobia”, “otw” and "organization for transformative works", “ao3”, “cvols”, and “weibo”.

apart from the posts about kutti, the only posts related to fandom racism are a few different posts where yishaqeni names the sinophobia that 2022 otw board candidate tiffany g faced. which i absolutely agree with, but is not at all related to the issues of otw’s internal racism and org culture that has been raised in the past few months, which yishaqeni blithely says has already been “analysed to death” - despite yishaqeni not having used the public platform where he's accusing kutti to uplift any of that analysis or critique.

how can you say that you “i stand 100% in solidarity with OTW volunteers, particularly the PAC team, cvols and POC vols who have quite frankly been done dirty by the board” when kutti is one of those people, and when you don’t actually do the hard work (at least publicly) to uplift them and stand by them on the shit that has come out this year? why is one of your few posts on the topic of racism at all your screed against a poc who is combating racism?

to be clear, yishaqeni’s targeting of kutti would be unconscionable even if they had uplifted other people talking about racism, for all the reasons i named in my first four points. but in this context it is even worse.

deepa's accusation #6: by targeting kutti in this post, yishaqeni is harming not only kutti, but also the larger movement to hold otw accountable for racism.

anyone who has actually taken the time to understand issues of racism in fandom should be aware that this kind of unfounded, targeted attack on a fan of color calling out racism won't only impact that fan, but also the larger fight against racism. in fact, targeting individuals like this is a very successful tactic to stymie anti-racism.

i don't know if yishaqeni's attack of kutti is intended to shut kutti up on racism. but even if unintentional, it is clear that yishaqeni either doesn’t understand or doesn’t care about how his words will in fact be used to support the existing culture of whiteness, racism, and organizational abuse at the otw. 

i just can’t get over how irresponsible and cruel it is to target kutti this way, to tone police them, to take the their statements out of context, and to undermine their work fighting racism within the organization. kutti was already under threat before yishaqeni’s post, both from the ccap itself and from their position calling out racism in a hostile organization, but yishaqeni has undoubtedly made it worse.

and this was a choice. a racist choice. yishaqeni did not have to say anything at all. or they could have made the kind of post that i mentioned earlier, once that spent most of its time decrying the culture at otw that led to things being this way rather than singling out a person of color trying to whisteblow. 

even though yishaqeni has quit the otw, others will undoubtedly use his accusations to undercut those who are fighting racism in the organization, whether inside or out. this is just one of myriad ways that racism is allowed to thrive in the otw. and, to use one of the words that yishaqeni finds so disagreeable, i think it’s absolutely disgusting. 

#otw racism #otw #fandom racism #organization for transformative works #otw board #otw elections #ao3 #archive of our own #otw leadership being racist

[nateconnolly]

I made a Patreon lol.

Here's the free sample post:

THE CREATION MYTH OF KILL 6 BILLION DEMONS

INTRODUCTION

I love fantasy religions. I love it when fictional humans try to understand worlds like Brandon Sanderson’s Cosmere and Tolkein’s Middle Earth through a religious lens—especially because in those books and in many others, the fantasy religions are somewhat true, and somewhat false. It’s really fun to look at a fictional universe through the eyes of a character who might not see things objectively. Religion usually plays a role in that. But, if I’m being honest, a lot of fantasy religions are just Christianity wearing a fun hat. Don’t get me wrong, I am fascinated by Chrisitianity, and I really enjoy a lot of fantasy versions of Christianity. But it’s a great special treat when a fantasy story goes the extra mile and portrays another concept of the divine. That’s one of many reasons that I love the webcomic Kill 6 Billion Demons. The webcomic’s fictional religion Atru has parallels to Taoism, Gnosticism, Advaita Vedanta, theothanatology, Biblical divine nomenclature, the list goes on. I just threw a lot of big scary words at you, but I promise, this is a beginner level essay. I’ll break everything down into bite-sized pieces. I just wanted to list out some of K6BD’s religious influences to show that they are complicated, and diverse.

This is specifically a essay about the creation narratives. K6BD is an amazing comic—later on, it tackles questions about time, free will, and optimistic nihilism, but I won’t dig into that stuff here. Those things would require their own essays. Here, I’m going to try to explain how the seven-part world came to be. More specifically, I’ll examine the stories that White Chain, Cio, Michael, and the old devil’s tale tell us; then I’ll look at fictional holy texts found in the Concordance.

I’ll also compare and contrast with a lot of real world religion and philosophy. I want to be clear that the creator Abaddon and I have never spoken. I don’t know where he got most of his inspiration. I’m not revealing any information that wasn’t already available, I’m just compiling it and offering my own thoughts. Unless I specifically quote Abaddon, assume that I’m not even talking about his inspirations. I’m drawing parallels because it’s fun, even though it probably won’t give us new insight into how the text was created.

I promise I’m not trying to convert you! I genuinely don’t want to make other people believe the religion that I believe—or any religion at all. I’m just trying to show you how understanding some real world religious and philosophical concepts can deepen your appreciation of K6BD. Obviously, there will be tons of spoilers, so go read the webcomic if you haven’t already. It’s absolutely genius.

Lastly, I want to say I will discuss suicide and murder.

Ok, let’s get started.

PART ONE: THE FIRST AND GREATEST DIVISION

Let There Be No Genesis

White Chain begins the history of the universe with the words, “Let there be no Genesis,” closely echoing the in-universe fictional Psalm I. “For indeed, there was [no Genesis]. God has always existed and has never existed.” As White Chain tells her story, we are shown the god YISUN. This figure is sometimes described with it/its or she/her pronouns, but for the sake of simplicity, I’m going to follow the example of the fictional Psalm I, and use he/him. I might call him “YISUN” or “God” with a capital G depending on the context.

YISUN was eternal, and the “undisputed master of the entire omniverse.” He predates everything else, and without him, nothing would exist.

YISUN has at least twelve bodies, probably more. Some are smiling, some look mad; some resemble insects or animals; most hold weapons; and all are different colors. The central white body has four arms. Abaddon has said that YISUN’s appearance is directly inspired by the Hindu god Vishvarupa.  Hindu gods are frequently depicted with multiple body parts, an artistic tradition that Doris Srinivasan calls “the multiplicity convention.” She explains some of the religious and artistic reasons that many Indian gods have multiple body parts in her book “Many Heads, Arms, and Eyes: Origin, Meaning, and Form of Multiplicity in Indian Art.” The tradition of Hinduism is long, and diverse, so the multiple limbs in one text can mean something very different from the multiple limbs elsewhere. Srinivasan closely examines a vast expanse of Indian history, and I don’t have time to present all her ideas. I would like to specifically focus on the interpretation that multiple limbs represent the manifestations of a singular godhead.

Srinivasan writes that “Multiple versions of a myth are facilitated by the idea that there exists multiple aspects or manifestations of a godhead.” Think of the difference between Greek and Hindu goddesses. Bruno Snell suggests “that these four women signalize the four aspects of all womanhood,” but Srinivasan qualifies his interpretation. The Olympian women “are not multiple forms of [one] Divine Woman, as is the case in Hinduism.” Artemis and Athena are different people who are both women, plural. Parvati, Sati, and Uma together are Woman, singular. Zeus, Demeter, and Poseidon are gods, plural. Shiva, Vishnu, and Krishna are God, singular. That’s not how all Hindus see things, but it is one Hindu perspective that I find especially comparable to K6BD.

Similarly, the multiple bodies are only manifestations of a single God: YISUN. All of his bodies are a single person. In Hinduism, the plurality of the divine can be seen as empowering and liberating. Multiple body parts signify that the god is a well-rounded entity. But Abaddon makes it look like a curse. He turns the artistic convention around. Using the same symbolism and metaphysics, he tells a radically different story. As White Chain says, “Being was only circular.” “YISUN had no equal… It was a wretched life, without meaning or perception. Imagine infinite stories to tell… and nobody to tell them to.” Perfection is lonely. At this point, YISUN is the only thing that exists, and that can’t be fun. All those arms and heads cannot satisfy YISUN’s need for companionship. It’s fascinating to me that when White Chain says YISUN had no one to whom it could tell its stories, Abaddon chose to illustrate multiple heads right next to each other. Even if those heads told each other stories, the speaker and the listener would still be the same person. Dissatisfaction with isolation is why YISUN created the world.

Although not all Hindus follow the school of Advaita Vedanta, in this case, I think it will be helpful to compare and contrast with Advaita. As Ram Shanker Misra writes in “The Integral Advaitism of Sri Aurobindo,” “Brahman [ is] perfect, absolute, infinite, need[s] nothing, [and] desir[es] nothing…” Brahman is full of all perfections. And to say that Brahman has some purpose in creating the world will mean that [Brahman] wants to attain through the process of creation something which it has not. And that is impossible.”

But that’s exactly why YISUN created this world. He wants to gain something that he does not have: companionship.The universe is God’s escape from himself. There was no Genesis, but there was “the first and greatest division: division of self”: “God committed holy suicide.”

2. The Divine Suicide

White Chain’s story is similar to Friedrich Nietzsche’s famous claim that “God is dead,” but Nietzsche did not mean God was a real entity that had literally died. He meant that intellectually, it was impossible to continue believing in God, and that all intellectual achievements founded on belief in Him had to be abandoned. Nietzsche’s claim is a famous example of a philosophical school of thought called death of God theology, also called “theothanatology,” which means “the study of God’s death” in Greek.

“Death” can mean a lot of different things in this context. Sometimes it’s metaphorical, sometimes it’s literal, and usually, it’s a very confusing mixture of both.

Nietzsche proposed the death of God as a social claim about humans. He’s talking about what we can believe, what we should do, and what we need to accept. God never really existed, but as religion loses followers and influence, even the idea of God has begun to “die” because it no longer has power over the real world.

“Death” can also mean God exists, but in a way radically different from what people usually mean when they say “God.” The Rabbi and philosopher Richard L. Rubenstein thought God exists as a “ground of being,” but not as a supernatural entity that made a covenant with Abraham. Rubenstein proposed the death of God as an intellectual change in what humans think the word “God” means.

And, finally, “death” can just literally mean “death.” The Protestant theologian Thomas J.J. Altizer wrote “we shall understand the death of God as an historical event: God has died in our time, in

our history, in our existence.” This isn’t a social claim about humans—it’s a metaphysical claim about God.

Death of God theologians usually mean more than one thing when they say God is dead. Nietzsche wasn’t just trying to convince Christians to become atheists; he was also trying to convince many atheists that they disbelieved in God in the wrong way. Altizer had radical thoughts about what human beings are able to believe.

White Chain means that God is dead in the literal sense. She is proposing a metaphysical belief that God, as a historical figure, chose to actually kill himself. White Chain is not rejecting or critiquing religion—she’s asserting that her religion, in which God has died, is fact.

You can see slight parallels to Nietzsche, Rubenstein, Altizer, Hegel, Zizek, and Blake in White Chain’s version of the fictional religion Atru. But there is no better comparison than the king of sad philosophers Philipp Mainlander.

Mainlander was an atheist—but not in the sense that people usually mean when they say “atheist.” Mainlander believed that there was a God at some time, but that time is now over. There isn’t a God anymore. Mainlander is pretty unique among death of God theologians because he explicitly describes God’s death as a suicide. Whittaker explains that Mainlander thought “[a]ll things have their origin in what may be called… the ‘will’ of the absolute being… to annihilate itself.” Essentially, the cause of the universe is God’s suicidal desires.

God was a “real unity,” but his death caused a “collective unity”—that’s the universe where we live now. God had been a total and undivided One, but now the universe is made of distinct parts. God cut himself apart into the pieces of the universe. God created the world by becoming it, and he became the world by dying.

Mainlander said “the knowledge that life is worthless is the flower of all human knowledge.” He thought suicide was desirable, and ultimately, he put his money where his mouth was. The biggest difference between Mainlander and White Chain is that she doesn’t seem to think ordinary people such as herself should follow God’s suicidal example. Even beyond the views of a specific character, the story of Kill 6 Billion Demons reads as an affirmation of life’s beauty and value.

But the webcomic clearly argues that making a better world is a bloody project. So it should come as no surprise that making the world itself involved bloodshed. First and foremost, the blood of God. What’s so interesting to me is that both White Chain and Mainlander equate God’s suicide to the creation of the world. Our life comes from God’s death. Creation and destruction aren’t opposites—they’re different ways of looking at the same process. At the end of Book 2, Allison destroys Mottom’s evil tree and a lot of her palace—but this destruction is also part of the creation of a more just and free world.

So, what did God’s destruction create? What came after YISUN?

3. The Duality of Un and Yis

The destruction of the total unity creates duality. I know that’s a little confusing because YISUN had many faces, but remember that behind all of those faces was one God, and only one. Not anymore. “From division was birthed duality. White Un, Lord of empty and still places, master of all that is not. Black Yis, infinite mother of the rampant flame. Master of all that is''

I cannot avoid comparing the White and Black gods to the Yin and Yang—a spinning black and white symbol usually associated with the religion Taoism. Yin and Yang represent a cosmic duality. Yin is associated with femininity, darkness, passivity, and even numbers, among other things. Yang is associated with masculinity, light, activity, and odd numbers, among other things. Mainstream Taoist philosophy asserts that the universe can be understood through duality. So, why are these pairs important? And why do things get paired together in the first place?

As is written in the foundational Taoist text the Tao Te Ching, “Being and non-being create each other. Difficult and easy support each other. Long and short define each other. High and low depend on each other. Before and after follow each other.” What’s so interesting about the pairs is they “create,” “support,” “define,” and “depend on” each other. Black can’t exist without white, and white cannot exist without black.

As the Encyclopedia of Philosophy puts it, “...yinyang is emblematic of valuational equality rooted in the unified, dynamic, and harmonized structure of the cosmos. As such, it has served as a heuristic mechanism for formulating a coherent view of the world…” Essentially, neither of these opposites are “dominant” or “truer.” Choosing one side won’t help you understand the universe because the universe is their partnership. Their equality gives “structure to the cosmos.” That structure is order, not chaos, but it is differentiated. There are two different things: Yin and Yang. They contradict each other, but at the same time, they make the universe. Yin and Yang are a productive paradox.

I’d like to return to the notion that “being and non-being create each other.” At this stage of creation in K6BD, UN and YIS could not exist without each other. Their very existence is the fact that they are not a unity. If there was only one of them, then there wouldn’t have been a division—and they are nothing more than the product of division. Just like how being and non-being create each other, the Master of All That Is and the Master of All That Is Not create each other. YISUN was characterized by his totality—he was the total sum of the omniverse, there was nothing else. After the division, Un and Yis experience otherness. The first otherness in the omniverse. It’s difficult for them to find balance—in fact, they immediately went to war for seven years. At the end of their seven-year war, Un and Yis made love for seven days.

I want to be very clear that this is not a depiction of actual Taoism. Yin and Yang are not gods with faces and minds. Notably, the Tao Te Ching asserts that yin and yang are “older than God.” so make of that what you will. But I think Taoism is thematically relevant to this era. Two opposites have to come into balance with each other. The whole universe is a duality of interconnected forces.

K6BD repeatedly emphasizes the need for community. As Allison says at the end of King of Swords, “I couldn’t have done this without any of you… We make mistakes. We learn from each other. We all still have so much to learn. Once I saw that as a weakness, now I’m certain it’s not. Someone who lives still thinking like that… struggling to do everything themselves… I can’t help but think how alone they must be.”

YISUN had to do everything all by himself, and we saw that Allison was right—isolation was a struggle, even for God. But the struggle is over, and in its place is duality. Partnership. The first community.

These are the first four parts of a fourteen-part critical essay. You can read the rest here.

Bibliography is on the free Patreon post.

#patreon #nate's writing #original post

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for watching a movie as a family without including my dad? Writing it out, I think I know the answer, but this has still been bugging me.

Around Thanksgiving I (30s) visited home. It was also a trip to see for my mom (late 60s) for her birthday, so I was there for a few days longer than a Thanksgiving trip would normally account for. My brother (30s) and his wife (30s) visited for her birthday too. My dad (early 70s) was there as well. They've been married over 30 years. Originally I'd planned to take everybody out to see a movie as a birthday present for my mom...but it turned out there was literally nothing at the theater that my mom was interested in at all. The town is pretty small, and the options were limited. So instead, we started out with a nice dinner, and family board game run-through of a trivia game we all thought we'd have some fun with. My mom ended up winning, which is rare and was not deliberate, and it wrapped the game up way faster than we'd anticipated.

My dad immediately went back into the living room after the game ended, openly a little annoyed that mom had won a trivia game based on something he considers himself the family expert in. He watches old reruns of the show he's seen a million times on a loop every day, and it can be pulling teeth to get him to do anything else. It was just a fluke, but something the rest of us considered a pleasant surprise since none of us had expected she'd win. But he was annoyed. Given that it was still early, Mom suggested we find a movie to watch online, so we could all wind down before bed with something the whole family could enjoy.

Dad said no. Now this feels like important context: I...have a lot of problems with my dad. I love him, but he can be extremely emotionally immature. Downright verbally abusive at times. And very petty. I'm in therapy in no small part due to some of the insecurities he instilled in me over the years. I've worked hard to set basic boundaries with him. He also has multiple medical issues, and I'm pretty sure he has untreated depression and other mental health problems he refuses to acknowledge that contribute to him flying off the handle at a moment's notice. That, combined with the fact that my mom will 100% never, ever leave him, because she was raised in a very specific mindset that she's never been fully able to shake...means my brother and I usually have to grit our teeth when he starts ranting/yelling/complaining during a visit, or we'd just end up ruining the day for our mom. She's done so much for us, and we just wanted her to have a good visit. So, that's what I did for most of the trip. I breathed deep when my dad openly mocked my stutter, and refused to get in a fight about it. I stopped myself from getting visibly upset when he tried to feed my cat table scraps even when I told him the cat needs a special diet. On other days I tried to watch his old shows with him, and ignored the sexist comments he'd make about the female leads, all for the sake of keeping the peace.

But, it was Mom's birthday. And she wanted to watch a movie.

And Dad said no.

He refused to give up his marathon of old westerns from 60 years ago to watch a new movie with his family on the big tv in the living room.

My mom seemed disappointed, so I suggested we watch one on my laptop in the kitchen instead. Without my dad, if he really wanted to watch his show instead. She agreed, and my brother, his wife, my mom and I filed into the kitchen, sat in less-than-comfy chairs, and watched a fantasy heist film that I'd thought they would all enjoy. And they did. My brother was pleasantly surprised at the quality of the movie (I'd already vouched for it being good, none of the others had seen it previously) His wife kept making notes for her dnd campaign. My mom found it hilarious, and liked that some actors from another show she liked were in it.

My dad stayed in the living room, watching his marathon.

Partway through the movie, he came in and asked us what we were watching. We told him, and he passed through the kitchen for something he needed, then said that we were being too loud. More context: the kitchen is right next to the living room, but my dad turns the tv up so loud in there it can get physically painful to be in the room with him. He refuses to get hearing aides, and only recently relented on subtitles. He also has a habit of screaming at anyone who tries to talk for a long time when his shows are on and they're in earshot, even if they're in a different room. We thought he couldn't hear it over his tv, and so when he said something we said sorry and that we'd try to keep it down, but we could already barely hear it through the laptop speakers. We already had subtitles turned on to make sure we didn't miss anything. When we told him that, he got even more annoyed. He asked how we'd like it if he turned the tv up so loud we couldn't understand anything, then proceeded to go into the living room and do just that, just as I was trying to figure out how much more we could lower the volume without losing our whole experience. We called in that we were already turning it down, and he finally turned his volume back down as well. We finished our movie, turning the volume down during action scenes and up during speaking scenes so we could actually hear the dialog. We enjoyed the rest of the film, and then people started getting ready for bed, and my mom went to check on my dad. She told me a few minutes later that he was hurt that we'd watched the movie without him. That he felt left out. I told her that he'd had multiple opportunities to join us, and that is was his choice not to watch with us. And honestly, the fact that he wouldn't give up the real tv for a couple hours so she could have a birthday movie was really upsetting to me.

She still seemed to feel bad that he was left out, and I'm a little worried that he might've sulked for days afterwards, leaving my mom in an even more stressful environment after I left. Am I the asshole for insisting my mom get to watch a movie on her birthday? And would I be the asshole if I told my dad off for what I consider to be extremely selfish behavior?

Also before anyone asks, no, I'm not cutting him off. It's literally impossible to do that without pretty much cutting off my mom as well, and she absolutely doesn't deserve that. And yes, I've offered up my apartment as a place she can stay if she ever needs to. Repeatedly. She hasn't taken me up on it yet.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[real-total-drama-takes]

This took a while because I dug up old emails and rang some people from my childhood for this, including my father who I haven't seen for three years. Here's how the Duncan, Courtney and Gwen saga caused my parents to divorce.

I was like 10 when World Tour came out and I used to watch it with one of my neighbours when each episode aired. We were at that sort of obsessed age where it was all we talked about, so we'd not shut the fuck up about it, I think I still have some Gwen fanart I drew. Anyway, when the greek episode aired, we got way too excited and replayed the the part we recorded a couple of times. By the time we were finished she missed curfew for about 30 minutes and I went to bed.

I woke up, with both parents gone from the home and my grandmother bringing me to her house. For about a week I stayed with her in total confusion not knowing anything, until my mother came and brought me home, my father not there. She said they split up, I was bummed but honestly more bummed that she, for some reason, banned me from ever watching Total Drama again.

It took me about 5 years until I found out what happened that night.

My friend ran home, and tried to get food from her kitchen without alerting her mom. But she was 10, so it didn't work. Her mom was pissed she came home late and without eating, started lecturing her while she made excuses. At one point she said something along the lines of "But mom! Courtney found out Duncan kissed Gwen." And that made her mom stop. Her mom asked again, she replied "Courtney found out he kissed her best friend, and she lost it"

Something happened, between the eating the food and the rushed speech, that her mother only heard "Courtney found out *gibberish* kissed gw*gibberish*"

A little bit of context I should add. My mothers name is Courtney. Well, Kourtney.

Another little bit of context.

My father was having an affair with my neighbours mother, my moms best friend.

Somewhere between the chewing, the speech impediment or just her mothers fear, she thought my mother had found out about the affair.

She sent my friend to her room and banned her from ever speaking to me again.

She called my father who was at work to tell him, so he freaked out and tried to get flowers and gifts to, I guess soften the blow?

So when he walked in to the house, flowers in hand, mistress following behind apologising, my mother didn't have a clue what he was talking about.

I don't know the specifics of what happened next, but I asked my father and he said that my mother attacked him & the mistress, and forced him out of the house. He, in turn, "reprimanded" (read, beat the shit out of) the other woman and got sent to jail. Overnight my mother decided to send me to her mother while she sorted things out around the house and asked my friends mother what the hell went on, and then filed for divorce from my father.

I didn't know this until I contacted my friend again, but there were three other consequences of the Duncan, Courtney Gwen saga (remember this is what was about). 1. My friends mother lost her position in the church due to the affair being revealed. 2. My father called in cps and alleged neglect in the home, sending my friend into foster care for a period of time. And 3. It came out about four years ago that the youngest sibling of my friend was biologically my fathers.

I didn't watch Total Drama again until I was 19. I started at the episode I never got to see, The Ex Files.

When Boyfriend Kisser came out it physically pained me so much I switched off the episode and didn't go back to it for another year.

TLDR- Not only did the Duncan, Courtney and Gwen saga cause my parents to divorce, it caused multiple physical assaults, a woman losing her job and a group of siblings going into foster care.

All for Boyfriend Kisser, the worst song I have ever heard

.

#tw domestic violence mention #total drama #fandom takes

[lutiaslayton]

Random update on the transcription of the Eternal Diva novel, aka probably the one that most people don't even care about that much to begin with

(though you should, I haven't translated it yet but I spotted a few words here and there that caught my attention such as Luke mentioning Misthallery multiple times. Also there is in the introduction a novel-exclusive scene with Janice in it, just fyi.)

To those who didn't know, most of my free time as of lately has been put into the transcription/translation website I have dedicated to the Japan-exclusive Layton content that we never got to see, and more specifically I have been transcribing the Eternal Diva novel. Because yes, now you know, Eternal Diva was adapted into a novel and none of us non-Japanese fans got to read it. And boy this novel is going to drive me insane because I have been working on it for literal weeks by now.

In terms of progress, I have reached the part of the story in which Puzzle 004 is about to start, aka right after the end of the "Layton McGuffinned a helicopter that thinks it's a grasshopper" part. I have transcribed up to page 119 (+ the ending is already transcribed and translated because past me felt like it), and there are now 74 blank pages left for me to fill. And then the translation will come, too. I am totally looking forward to it. Can you feel the enthusiasm in my exciting punctuation.

This is the shortest novel of the list (200 pages if I count the blank ones), and this is the only novel that has furigana everywhere (aka the only one of the four I can actually read somewhat properly). Yippeeeee

Anyway if you want to take a look even though only the beginning and the end are translated for the time being:

You can take a looksie right here!

The reason why I'm going through the entire transcription first and that the full translation will only come afterwards is because, at least in my opinion if I were to view this as a reader instead of as the person uploading the content, this means that you guys get to know the story faster than if I progressed through both the transcription and translation at the same time.

After all, let's see it like this: sure, you can't read Japanese, and for the most part, neither can I. But since it's been transcribed, it means that you can easily copy-paste the Japanese text into DeepL, or Google Translate, or any translator of your choice. Sure, it's more work for you and if you are of the lazy kind you will still have to wait the same amount of time regardless (not saying it in a derogatory way), but at least it gives the choice for the ones who want the whole story to get it somewhat faster.

I don't speak Japanese, and I am not translating things as I go, so I have only a vague understanding of what is going on in the novel (and obviously, the fact that I know the plot of the movie is a huge help). But I can already tell you this much:

We get the lyrics for the ending's song, obviously. This is part of what has been translated so far.

The whole novel is not divided into chapters, but rather into smaller scenes/sections (however you want to call it). Some are narrated by Luke, some others are narrated by Janice (and/or Melina, I guess it depends on the context). Just like the three main novels you may be slightly more familiar with, the narration is in first person.

Since the only narrators who showed up so far are Luke and Janice/Melina, I don't think the scenes from Emmy's POV will be included (aka the one in which she questions Nina's parents, the one in which she is with Schrader, and the one in which she finds and rescues Grosky in the middle of the ocean). Perhaps they are going to appear later in the novel, but I highly doubt it for a number of reasons (number of pages in each section, and titles of said sections).

The novel starts with an exclusive scene under the POV of Janice. It takes place three years after the case, and she is just finished singing for the last rehearsal before the opera she will play in the day after — it is The Eternal Kingdom, which she has not sung in three years, and the next day will be the second time ever this opera will be sung in a theatre with a public. Of course, no eternal life game planned this time. Janice also gets a letter of encouragement from Whistler, which is pretty sweet.

Unless I missed it and it somehow happens in the part I did not yet translate, the intro of the movie in which Luke and Layton solve the case where Don Paolo decided to mess with the bells of Big Ben is not at all mentioned in the novel. Luke in the novel doesn't give the introduction-narration speech that he does in the movie, we jump straight into the scene in which he is shown in Layton's office pretending to be pointing at culprits (and we get a fun little scene showing what led up to him doing it). Go read it, it is translated, and I do not want to spoil for you the opportunity to read Luke being a dork all over again.

We switch to the flashback telling the actual events, and this is the part that has no translation yet. I won't give many details as a result since I don't know the things for sure myself, but as I said earlier, I saw a few words that I recognised here and there: notably, Luke mentions Misthallery on at least two occasions. If memory serves, one of them is when Grosky shows up to "arrest" the puppet, and I think Luke went on a small tangent to give a small summary of the events of Last Specter (aka how he met Grosky), and also mentions Descole (though he does not give his name, since I'm pretty sure that he didn't hear the words "My name is Jean Descole" at the time, and only learned that precisely upon meeting him again in ED). On another time he mentions it, from what I vaguely understood he may be making a reference to Naiya, Janice/Melina's friend who can be found in Misthallery and who is also a singer (she's the NPC who is meant to represent the singer of Paxmaveiti, just like Yuming is meant to represent the singer of Mysterious Flower in Miracle Mask). Pretty inconsequential, but it's always fun to have continuity nods and references to the actual plot of other stories.

Finally, back to three years later, we get an epilogue narrated by Luke which is the exact same scene as the movie: Layton and Luke are listening to Janice's opera, and at some point Janice shows up to say hi. Luke also mentions what happened to the rest of the participants after the case throughout those three years; most are just what we see from the credits, but the novel still gives a few more details in some cases:

By the time of the original trilogy, Amelia is studying abroad at a foreign university, and she recently sent a letter to Layton and Luke, saying that she is grateful even after three years.

Luke is friends with Nina, who comes by at Gressenheller every now and then, and he even considers her a rival of sorts due to Nina having a good memory and studying well. (also what the heck Luke why are you talking about getting to college and how you're worried that she may be admitted to college before you do, you're THIRTEEN)

Celia Raidley and Pierre Starbuck got married "just the other day" (yes, the ship is now officially confirmed beyond just the one image from the movie credits) and the tabloids are going wild over it.

Luke is reading Annie Dretche's latest mystery novel, and he can't put it down. Annie apparently told him that she has been writing faster so that Bargland (the guy who said he did not have much time left due to an illness) can read them at the hospital. Seems like "six months" turned into three years after all, good for him!

Anyway, that's all I have to say for now, I hope you enjoyed the rambling. I hope this will reach some fans of the movie who would be excited to get a few more details!

#professor layton #professor layton and the eternal diva #eternal diva #lutiasgithub #professor layton transcript #eternal diva novel

[girlyholic]

A Needlessly Thorough Counterpost to Cybr.Grl’s Video on Jirai

So this was brought to my attention, as I have been subscribed to cybr.grl on Youtube for about a year. And when I saw the notification for a video on Jirai, I was very intrigued!

And it took very little time for my intrigue to turn into exasperation.

So, so much of this video is misinformed, and is far too charitable about Jirai as a concept, which is reckless and dangerous. I was also informed it seems that any comments disputing or disagreeing with the information in the video are being deleted.

This should be an open discussion, and when it is not allowed to be one is where I start to have a problem. Putting up a video on something that has literally killed people and then tuning out anybody who tries to bring this up is inexcusable, if that is truly what’s going on here.

However, I don’t think that everyone in this video has no idea what they’re talking about and are flat out wrong, rather, they’re going off of personal experiences and information that has some basis in reality. However, the information about Jirai being presented here either has more context to it, or is easily debunkable, and that is what I aim to achieve with this post.

BIG TW for this post, as I will be mentioning the many harms of Jirai, such as self-harm, prostitution, and both of these topics in relation to minors.

This video is entirely built upon the assertion that the Girly style is inherently tied to something negative due to its association with Jirai, which I have debunked multiple times on this blog already. To briefly reiterate why Girly gets conflated with Jirai, a viral dressup challenge about emulating the “landmine girl” stereotype linked the term to the fashion and brands started using it for marketing purposes over the popularity of said challenge. Funny enough, most of them have gone back to referring to the style as Girly again since the hype and intrigue around the term has gone down.

Fact is that Girly is the established name of the fashion, and has been for many, many years. The term Girly as its name can be traced back on the internet as far back as 2001.

In fact, here is a Wayback Machine link to an old blog for the prominent Girly brand Liz Lisa, where the clothes this brand sells are referred to as being Girly,  in the year 2006.

I have made a whole post on this “Jirai for clicks” phenomenon using Lafary as an example, but brands do this as well, for all of the same reasons. Some brands, such as DearMyLove, have only doubled down on their usage of Jirai and Ryousangata, and it unfortunately looks like this specific marketing ploy, which is aimed towards young girls in order for them to buy these products, is here to stay.

All of this indicates that Jirai is not a style on its own, but a fad, which is provable time and time again by brands and influencers going back to using Girly when it’s convenient for them.

Simply put, the truth is that there is only the “landmine” lifestyle, as it is described in the video, and there is Girly fashion. There is nothing inherently negative about the fashion.

The specific substyle of Girly that is associated heavily with landmine girls is called "Dark Girly".

But the specifics of the attitude of “Jirai” as a “style” being presented as something negative in the video is a point that’s worth examining, because it isn’t completely incorrect.

Chiara alludes to the idea that if you were to “wear Jirai” in Shinjuku, you would be more likely to get called out like a prostitute in the street if you were to hang around at night. This is true, and her reasoning behind this is also true, when she mentions the fact the landmine stereotype came from Kabuki-cho.

But the thing that is extremely glossed over in this video is how serious this aspect of the stereotype is and where it specifically came from in the first place.

This next section is where I will be discussing the topics in the trigger warning at the start of this post, so please proceed with caution.

This type of clothing became aligned with the landmine stereotype due to many incidents in Kabuki-cho of primarily underage, self-proclaimed landmine girls who were known to prostitute themselves, publicly self-harm, and sometimes even commit suicide in high numbers. Here are two articles on this exact subject as it relates to the landmine lifestyle that I have posted before.

“Even self-harm is a trend now?” - Discusses a rise in the commodification of self-harm scars as being cute, and the lengths some youths in Kabuki-cho have gone to achieve this “pien”, sickly cute aesthetic.

“An increase of "suicide cases" in Kabuki-cho, in it's background are teens who depend on numbers” - Discusses an increase of public rooftop suicides in 2021 in this area, mostly among youths and prostitutes who feel as though they are not popular or worthy enough to live.

Which brings me to another point that I would like to discuss, as it comes up as a derogatory term in these two articles, is the attitude towards Menhera that is on display from the two guests on this video.

Quite frankly, the assertion that Menhera is the dirty word here, and that Jirai is in any way preferable, is nonsense.

The only thing that’s true here is that Menhera can be abused in a derogatory manner, but it never was the intend behind its creation. Menhera has an extensive history as a positive term that mentally ill individuals came up with for themself that has since been twisted into being a derogatory term by neurotypicals. More on that here, if you are interested in a lengthier explanation of why these two terms are completely different things, and how Menhera is a mental health awareness subculture.

You are not winning by going “Menhera bad” and glossing over all the harmful aspects of Jirai as if they wouldn’t exist or get embraced within the community in Japan. Menhera may have a negative public meaning due to social stigma, but let’s not pretend that suddenly makes Jirai the good one.

Because at least the original intend of Menhera as name of a mental health community is still visible to this very day. Meanwile all we have of Jirai is the usage as an insult as well those who use it in a self-affirming manner for their self-destructive habits.

The main point I wish to end on is that the associated style, Girly, is harmless.

The thing I hate the most about this video is how it is spreading the idea that you might have to worry about a horrifying culture of romanticized self-harm being associated with your frilly clothes, as if that’s just how it is.

Going by the Shinjuku example, this is certainly a real thing that is already being assumed. Which is unfortunate on so many levels.

That doesn’t have to be how Girly is being seen in the public eye, but it sure as hell will be if people keep trying to claim that Jirai is only the name of a fashion and that Girly doesn’t exist.

#j*rai #sexism #ableism #girly discourse

[rotzaprachim]

Fiction doesn’t equal reality obvious disclaimer but one of the weird things about the shadow and bone fandom is it like…. Is to me a kind of record of the dehumanizing moral polarity people had around Jews prior to Oct 7 when everything about Judaism became Bad and Fair game. Like the darkling imho is Jewish coded and he does very bad things in ways that aren’t separated from how he is Jewish coded-not only because there are no guarantees that being a marginalized person will stop you from hurting others, but because of the fact marginalization and pain don’t teach valuable lessons and instead force many people into the idea they need violence and extremism - including against their own people, especially women - to Keep Everyone Safe. Like the darkling’s logic and thought processes are very similar to Jewish nationalists and militarists, not only to Zionism but the most specifically violent and extreme forms and fandom was OK with it because the IRL Jewishness had been scrubbed from the box at the same time they expressed genuine hatred of Jews in real life with ideologies nowhere newer as extreme. But see aleks, a fictional Jewish coded man, Had to be good and alright and cool even as he did (check notes) kill mass numbers of people and almost destroy a comity because what if those people didn’t like grisha? It’s the acceptance of fictional Jewish extremism without serious empathy for the complex politics of real Jews that disturbs me. People like Jewish violence when it’s removed from the context of real life. I’m going to mix metaphors for a second because this is a fantasy series and they mix metaphors. Leigh specifically multiple times said she didn’t model Matthias on Nazis and that he isn’t one and fandom didn’t buy her. I don’t want to let Matthias off the hook - I think he’s a fascinating and profoundly messy character- but I think the refusal to take Leigh at her word flattened the fact that Matthias as a violent religious extremist is an uncomfortably mdoern and global figure. There are evangelical Christians in the us like Matthias, there are Muslims and Hindus like Matthias, and - there are Jews like Matthias. Much of matthias’s logic and violence reflects the ideology of modern right wing religious Jewish men men in Israel, down to the fear of women’s voices or being touched by a woman. Much of Matthias’s ideology and backstory is probably closer to a his family was actually killed, as has been the case with some of the killings of Israeli civilians. So I’m not saying he /is/ a violent right wing Jew but there’s much about him that’s /like/ them in real life. To me the darkling and matthias represent two of the worst modern streaks of Jewish violence - one explicitly Jewish, one universalized but potentially so-, and so it’s wild to see years of fandom refusing to see that Jews /could/ be bad or do and things and then wiping all those things they did away at the same time as many of the same people are genuinely fine with making generalized moral claims that real Jews actually are inherent morally monstrosities of evil now that it’s become politically and culturally acceptable to do so

[cherrixxox]

In Princess Zelda’s defense: Misogyny in the Legend of Zelda (and every fandom really)

(Spoiler Warning for BOTW and TOTK)

One thing I’ve noticed as Tears Of the Kingdom has come out, is this incredibly shameless irritable misogyny in the Legend of Zelda fandom. With fandom and internet culture really boosting in the last decade, I feel as if people are less fearful of what they say, and I’ve noticed it in the fandoms I love, like Legend of Zelda specifically.

What could I possibly mean? Doesn’t everybody love Zelda? You’d be incredibly surprised what people say about her.

I can’t image why. She’s incredibly kind, smart, interesting and an emotionally complicated character, which I personally find endearing and not at all bland. However, I think I’ve finally come to understand *why* she’s so hated in the fandom as of this last couple weeks. I think I finally get it.

Zelda is a complex character. I know this doesn’t fit with some of the fandoms fantasy of her being “boring”, but I challenge that with a question. Why is it that every female character, regardless of personality, backstory and upbringing, actions and speech patterns are all boring to you? Is it because they’re actually boring? Or is it because female characters, no matter how developed, will always take the back seat to male characters even with less complexities?

I think I would be remiss if I didn’t mention shipping culture playing a huge part. It’s unfortunate, because, as a gay person, I do think that a lot of the fujoshi/bl community is misogynistic and hates admitting that: so they turn towards the only thing they can- picking and choosing small scenes and lines out of context to demonize a perfectly fine character.

Let me remind you all that I don’t care about harmless shipping. Mostly everyone in fandom ships characters. It’s normal and as long as you aren’t being weird about it and everything is morally correct: who cares. However, I do think that shipping culture has made is hard for people in fandom to correctly distinguish media in any other way. And that’s unfortunate. But I’ll come back to my shipping point later.

Zelda, for instance, is not fond of Link in the beginning of the TOTK/BOTW/Age of Calamity timeline. That’s very apparent from the very first memory in order from Breath of the Wild. In context, that all makes sense why and it’s explained very well. She very quickly after takes a liking to Link, and the rest is history.

However, you have people saying that she’s awful, hates Link, treats him badly, etc. She’s being treated like she’s helpless, something that, in game, she despises feeling. If you can’t tell from context, many times it’s said out loud and in your face. Take this memory with Urbosa for example:

She feels like a failure and Link being appointed to her just reminds her of that feeling.

Despite feeling this way, she’s proven to be a character that can grow and develop. She takes a liking to Link, as previously mentioned before, shortly after said scene with Urbosa explaining to link why she is the way she is. After her heart crushing memory where she’s sobbing about how she couldn’t save her father, the champions or Hyrule, Link is in danger. He is close to death and still he refuses to give up. At the very moment he is going to die. Zelda *finally* is able to release her power, after many many years, and in turn, his life. Why? Because she loves him.

Mipha hints at this being the way she can release her power. Though she doesn’t outright say it, it’s incredibly obvious she’s trying to get across that Zelda think about love and who she cares for.

I feel like if a man had that same backstory, people would acknowledge how incredibly complex of a character he was. They never do this with female characters, and instead take their emotions at face value, like how Zelda has multiple scenes where her determinations, wants and hopes are explained with heavy emotion and people throw it all away for some screwed up, incorrect perception of a character who is more multifaceted then they can ever comprehend.

And why do I think people refuse to look at the truth when it comes to Zelda? Yep, I’m going back to shipping. Like I mentioned before, specifically the fujoshi shipping community seems to be incredibly misogynistic as a whole. And if you self identify as a fujoshi, please stop. It’s not a good term or a nice term. Obviously this isn’t about people who enjoy gay ships in general as I don’t see any harm in shipping whatever you want as long as it’s not morally wrong. However, as someone who has been heavily engrained in fandom culture for the majority of my life: women are second rate citizens to the vast majority of these people.

With the appearance of Sidon in BOTW came a brand new ship that, though I think it’s a very very weird ship considering that Sidon looks like this when Link first meets him:

I never had anything much to say about it. I didn’t ship it, but to each their own since Sidon is very much an adult in current day BOTW/TOTK.

However, the birth is Sidon as a character has incredibly turned the tide when it comes to how people view Zelda. Every bit of character growth and backstory has been dismantled because they see her as a “home-wrecker” to this very much headcanoned ship. I genuinely think people who do this have very little ability to understand female characters in any piece of media, but Zelda is a great example of this. Now that TOTK has come out and Sidon (reminder from the beginning of this post, that I said there would be spoilers) canonically has a Fiance, I feel like this misunderstanding of female characters has just completely gone off the rails and people are now just saying things completely untrue.

For one: I don’t think arranged marriages are ever the best way to try to convince an audience that two characters are in love, and I give that to the shipping community completely. Arranged marriages are not good 9/10 times. Though, sometimes they work out, it’s often for political reasons, and almost never are these two people in love. It’s not a good trope. *However*

Sidons case is different. Yona, a brand new character in the series, is his fiancé. She’s, in my opinion, is quite pretty and helpful to the Zora community, as she seems to be their main healer in the domain.

A lot of the fandom is taking the fact that he saw her as a sister when he was a CHILD out of context as he quite literally says in the next paragraph that his feelings for her start to change and become “difficult to quantify” which clearly, in this case, means that those feelings are changing. And then, he seems to get to embarrassed to go further as those are for more private thoughts. Not only that, but Sidon very clearly calls her his love multiple times, even when she isn’t around.

And how does this character, the kind and caring Yona get treated?

Badly. Just from the first month of this game being out I’ve heard that she should die, she’s a dumb bitch, she’s ugly, she’s boring (how creative), etc.

I can’t help but notice that these comments are clearly coming from a place of distain that Sidon isn’t a free man, and believe it or not hating a female character because she gets in the way of your ships is misogynistic whether or not you think it is!

Now that Sidon isn’t free for grabs, I feel like that brings considerably more backlash upon Zelda yet again because she’s just not a character that can be ignored in favor of Sidon anymore. I’ve noticed an incredible increase of this hate that just doesn’t make any sense to me.

Hating female characters just because they get in the way of your ships will never be cool, but will always unfortunately be a part of fandom that I will refuse to get behind. It’s not just The Legend of Zelda fandom. I can name multiple female characters who get hate for the same exact thing.

This may have just been a rant that went on too long, maybe a mini essay, I’m not sure, but I genuinely challenge the Zelda community to interact more with the actual game over who belongs with who and stop picking at straws to find faults in characters that ruin your perfect perception of who you want to be with who. And please, judge the female characters the same way you’d judge the male characters.

-Cherri 🍒

#legend of zegend #zelda spoilers #zelda tears of the kingdom #legend of zelda tears of the kingdom #zelda totk #totk link #shipping #link #zelda #legend of zelda botw #a quick legend of zelda rant #loz yona #loz sidon #Sidon #I just think some of the fandom needs to chill #legend of zelda essay #more takes like this are probably coming soon