#therapy thoughts

[alicerader]

#humor #relatable memes #memes #lol memes #lol #funny because it's true #iykyk lol #funny meme haha #funny post #therapy thoughts #mental health memes #mental health things #trust issues #glass half empty #we survived

[bpdarlingx]

It's not as simple as 'reaching out'

I HATE when people state that people with mental illness have to reach out for help and can't expect people to deal with them until they heal, as if it's as simple as calling a helpline and then we're miraculously cured.

For the past 10 years I have been 'reaching out'. I have seen psychologists, counsellors, psychiatrists, social workers, peer support workers. I've been hospitalised 9 times (3 of which I was involuntarily sectioned). I've tried 15 different psychotropic medications including anti-depressants, mood stabilisers & anti-psychotics. I've tried countless forms of therapy - DBT, ACT, CBT, Art/ music therapy, schema, cognitive analytical therapy etc.

I have reached out and was met with: 18 month waiting lists for specialist help Dismissive & gaslighting doctors who don't listen or even want to help Therapists who refuse to work with me because of my BPD diagnosis Being told I'm 'too complex' and my conditions are never going to get better Being completely sedated by medication because doctors would rather me not be an issue to others instead of actually helping me

Blamed for the abuse I sustained as a child and traumatising things that have happened to me and being completely re-traumatised

All this and then I get the honour of paying $200p/h for these 'professionals' to 'help' me.

I have been dehumanised and vilified by almost every doctor/ psych I have seen over the past 10 years. Not listened to , over medicated and left hollowed out, worse off and hopeless; so no... it's not as simple as 'reaching out' and mentally ill people deserve healthy relationships even if we aren't in therapy.

#actually mentally ill #ed not ed sheeran #bpd problems #bipolar disorder #actually bipolar #actually borderline #actually adhd #mentally fucked #mental health #therapy thoughts #dbt therapy #bipolar 1

[andivmg]

another feelings post

sorry in advance for how long it is

had a therapy appointment yesterday and i bawled my eyes out the entire time just feeling angry and sad and confused with myself. because of this whole conversation around abuse and toxic relationships, i’ve been feeling all kinds of weird recently and talked about it with her and i wanted to share some of the things we said in case anybody needs to hear it

so i’ve been really beating myself up over the fact that i’m still upset at things that happened over two years ago and i was feeling really confused as to why. my life has improved infinitely since then, i no longer have any of these people in my life. i am so much happier. so why am i still so angry? why can’t i seem to let go? i was feeling like a little kid, one of the things i said was quote “it’s just not fair! we were together for only a year! how is it fair that it’s taken me two years and counting to get over shit he did in half the time? why does he get to be fine while i’m still in therapy fixing what he broke? like what is wrong with me? why can’t i just let go of shit that happened so long ago? why did i even have to go through that in the first place? it’s just not fair!”

clearly, i was unwell. but yeah i was feeling really angry at myself and as we kept talking we came to the conclusion that it’s okay to be angry. because it’s true. it’s not fair. that’s what happens with abuse, it ends up falling on the person who was on the receiving end of it to pick up the pieces while the perpetrator doesn’t think they did anything wrong in the first place. that is just an unfortunate fact of life. so how do you move on knowing that? you’re just supposed to be okay with it? no. again, it’s okay to be angry and to cry and be upset about it because you’re feeling your emotions and letting it all out. it’s perfectly normal to be upset about what you went through. it does not mean you are still hung up on the person or that you haven’t moved on. it just means that person was really shitty to you and you’re angry about it. it’s okay to be upset. we are human, we are not above feeling any emotion. as long as you are not taking those feelings out on people who love and care about you and want the best for you, be upset. scream into your pillow, cry, break shit (preferably in a rage room). if it’s what you have to do to release that anger, do that. it’s okay.

now then, why do we have to go through that pain in the first place? because it’s part of being human. ik that’s not what anybody wants to hear. it sucks. what do you mean that’s just a part of being human? that’s so unfair. true. it’s not. however, it being a part of life doesn’t make it okay for the other person to have treated you like they did. that does not justify what they said and did. but, what we choose to do afterwards is what defines us, and what will become of us.

the analogy we used was this:

it’s like going to the gym. when you work out, you create microtears in your muscles, that’s why you’re so sore the next day. but when those muscles heal, they become bigger, stronger. and when you do that exercise again, it doesn’t hurt as much and you can handle more. but, if you say “fuck this i’m not going to the gym again because i’m sore the next day and it hurts” then your muscles will become weak again and you’re right back to where you started.

like i said before, it sucks that the responsibility of moving on and becoming stronger or a better person falls onto us. but you still have to face that shit. you have to truly come to terms with the fact that you were emotionally or physically abused and decide what you will do about it now. will you accept this behavior going forward from them or anyone else? how will you react if someone tries to do the same thing this person did? will you fall back into the victim pattern or will you gather your strength to never let this happen to you again?

clearly, this process takes a really long time. it could take, years, months, even decades in some cases. and it’s hard. it’s so difficult to be strong. it is an active choice we have to make every day. and it’s okay if you’re not feeling strong some days. it’s okay to have moments of weakness. but those moments of weakness cannot overshadow all the strength it has taken to come as far as you have. sometimes it will feel like you’re going backwards, but you are not. healing is not linear and that is okay.

much love to anyone who read this whole thing. if even one person reads this and feels understood, then this post has served its purpose.

#therapy thoughts

[path3ticp0tat0]

Literally just wanna get high and horny and stupid, cock warm someone while they alternate playing with my nipples and my clit until I cum on their cock. But no I gotta go to therapy....

#therapy thoughts #i think im getting more comfy at therapy #still would rather get railed

[therapythoughtstogether]

Everything is so calm that it scares me...

I'm so used to chaos. I'm afraid this is the calm before the storm.

I don't know how to be happy without being constantly afraid...

#therapy thoughts #bpd #actually bpd #bpd thoughts #afraid of the calmness #afraid to be happy

[haleyrose19]

Charlie: it’s funny in movies how they portray sad people. Like, oh my, they’re sitting around in their pyjamas all day, living on the couch, never showering, never fixing their hair. “They have really let themselves go. This must be horrible” Like, that’s just a normal week?? That’s been me every day since I was 4. It’s no big deal. It’s normal.

Nick: ...Char, the light of my life. You are very fucked up. Let’s go get you some therapy, yeah?

#heartstopper #nick x charlie #therapy thoughts #charlie spring #nick nelson

[crowneprince]

So easy!

#scribble kibble #comic #marriage #therapy thoughts

[a-j-s-the-only]

therapy

it’s like that feeling when you are by yourself and can finally just let a tear slip behind the closed door of your room. When you can finally just drop your shoulders and release your breath.

Something people don’t say about therapy, is you learn to hold your breath. The whole week it just piles up, till you are in the safe place with your person. Then you can just unload.

But some weeks you don’t get to unload everything. So you continue to haul that load of bricks on your back till the next session.

#life #poetry #poems on tumblr #poemsbyme #poets corner #my art #poets on tumblr #poem #poetsclub #poets cafe #Therapy #therapy thoughts #therapy session #therapy stuff

[butchesanddykesandqueersohmy]

Unironically though your guilt and shame will kill even the most beautiful, healing and tender of things for you if you don't heal them first.

#its me <3 #my words #therapy thoughts

[siecobaina]

saw a post that was like "nowadays its all red flags and did you go to therapy what about real love" and all the replies were like "terrible take" but i think the truth behind what they were saying is that love shouldn't be "the right person needs to find me and fight for me and fundamentally be without problem" but "how can i love others. how can i show affection. how can i solve problems with another person because i want to love them and i am choosing to love them." we focus so much on being desirable and being worthy of love. when did love become such a selfish act?

#sisyphus 55 and olisunvia have good videos about this on yt #but don’t stream on mon dec 11 bc of gaza strike #also id recommend simone de beauvoir for a fresh perspective on love and marriage #love #thoughts about love #philosophy #writing #relationships #relationship advice #mental health #therapy thoughts #dating #dating advice #thoughts about dating

[hrhmiat]

Thoughts on Mia's blow-up at Michael in book 8

After a conversation with my friend, whose preference for being tagged here is uncertain, so I'll just keep her anonymous, but I have to give her major kudos!! (you know who you are ;)) I've just realized why Mia reacts so spastastic to the whole Judith Gershner situation.

But before diving into that, let me share my initial thoughts before coming to the realization and understanding of Mia's outburst: When I reached that part in the book, I couldn't comprehend why she reacted so strongly. I mean, I knew sex and losing her virginity was a big deal to her, but the thought never crossed my mind of the reverse. If Michael had had sex with anyone else. I mean, I honestly didn't think Michael had it in him, tbh. lol. (but then again, he's a hot nerd so who can blame him) Was I just as shocked as Mia? YES!!!! YES, I WAS!!! Also, I don't think Michael even handled it well. He was just so not sensitive in parts of their conversation. but then again, Mia was freaking out, and that, in turn, threw him off. (Also, he's what, 19?) Though, he did keep his cool for the most part .... till the very end where he lost his cool for a second. In fairness, Mia was going crazy.... with crazy eyes, as he pointed out. He was worried about her; he had never seen her so upset before. I think Michael *knew* this would happen, that THIS would upset Mia. That's why he didn't come right out and tell her. And like he said, it's not like Mia asked about it. I think if Mia asked, he would have been upfront with her. He's not a liar. How was Michael supposed to know that Mia treasured her "precious gift" of virginity? She never talked about it with him. I don't think they talked a whole lot about sex because she was uncomfortable with it, and Michael wasn't going to push her (only push the boundaries with his hands when they wandered in their makeout sessions.) Sure, they had their three-month "talk," religiously but that was more or less like... Mia:"I'm not ready" Michael: "Fine. We'll reconvene in three months." It's not like Helen goes around preaching abstinence. I get not wanting your daughter to have sex at 14 and telling her she should wait, but that isn't the same as what Mia was reading in Tina's books about purity, and you're only worth is your virginity crap. Like I think if Helen knew what Mia was reading she'd have a serious sit down heart-to-heart with her daughter and tell her she's worthy no matter what. Those books did so much damage to Mia!!!! I think when Michael was fooling around with Judith, he was upset that Mia liked Kenny, not him. He was upset at himself that he didn't make his move at the movies and ultimately upset that he fell for his little sister's best friend, a girl who should more or less be like a sister to him, but he's gone and fallen hard for her. I think he was at a very low point when he and Judith were studying. Did he make the first move? Did Judith? I honestly think Judith did since she had a boyfriend. Did Michael regret being with Judith after? Abso-fucking-lutely! Why else would he try and forget about it? "It was before you and I even started going out...." (I didn't want to think about how stupid I was for being so upset you didn't like me) "I didn't think- I mean, it was so long ago-" (yeah... I didn't think you liked me.... so I slept with her.... and now I'm trying to block it out of my memory, Mia) Another thing is, I think Michael honestly forgot as time went on... like in his mind, it was just a fact that he slept with Judith and thought at some point he had told Mia since Michael said with a straight face and no hesitation, "No, of course not. You know that" after Mia asked him, "are you not a virgin?" Then, when Mia was like, "NOOOOO, I DID NOT KNOW THAT!" He got VERY aware, VERY quickly, that they had NOT talked about his past because he knew she was jealous of that person and didn't want to upset her. I think if they were THAT serious about having sex in the past, I think Michael would have told her, but he knew she was never serious, so why bring it up if she didn't want to discuss it with him?

Anyway... I've always sided with Michael and Lilly on this one—why the heck did Mia explode the way she did?

Well, the discovery dawned on me that while Mia was struggling to process Michael's surprise news about him leaving for Japan for a year OR MORE, the discovery that he's not a virgin, a detail he's kept hidden from her throughout their relationship, triggered her beyond her capacity. I truly think it took her back to when the other people she trusted in the whole world (Her mom and dad) had betrayed her trust when they told her she was a princess. Not saying this is as shocking as her parents lying about her being a princess all her life, but she trusted Michael and he betrayed her trust by not telling her one of THE most important thing she cares about. This is why she said he lied (even though he didn't). Omitting the truth is the same thing to her. Anyway, let me know your thoughts if you disagree or agree or want to add anything else that I missed! Loved to hear everyone else's thoughts!

#the princess diaries #mia thermopolis #princess diaries #books #snowflakenecklace #michael moscovitz #therapy thoughts #deep dive

[hugs4neth]

My therapist: Does your mother take any meds?

Me: No?

Therapist: *taking notes* uhhuh uhhuh uhuh

#What’s that supposed to mean #Quotes #therapy #therapy thoughts #therapy quotes

[dykonradish]

I highly recommend getting the normiest woman therapist you can find. You can be like “i spent 9 days on womyn’s land and it was a beautiful freeing experience” and explain how you didn’t have to police your thoughts or words in the same way you usually do, and she’ll just talk to you like it’s a fun cool summer camp that she wishes she could go and tell you you’re one of her favorite clients

#therapy thoughts

[therapythoughtstogether]

Splitting is exhausting

I splitted on my best friend (who is also my fp). We were arguing and they raised their voice, which is a trigger for me, because I've experienced so much abuse and violence.

In that moment I lost my mind. I was screaming and yelling at the top of my lungs, saying things that were actually true but in the most hurtful way I could. And I didn't have time to stop myself... It was an immediate reaction to a trigger.

Then we made up and I was all calm again, as if nothing had happened. But I was feeling exhausted, my throat was sore and all my body was aching, as if I had been thrown around by a tornado, like a rag doll.

It is exhausting, and at this point I can hardly control it. I don't want to be this way...

#therapy thoughts #bpd #actually bpd #bpd splitting splitting is exhausting #bpd fp #I don't want to be this way #yet for now I cannot help it #abuse survivor #bpd triggers #mental health #awareness #bpd awareness

[divyachamaria]

My therapist told me about cognitive diffusion - when you first notice yourself having a thought driven by your anxiety, you write it down on a piece of paper, and notice the thought rather than getting caught up or buying into it − letting thoughts come and go rather than holding onto it. So then I started practicing saying it in a number of funny voices in my head. It took away the power from the thought and I realised that I don't necessarily have to believe it.

That’s when I realised it is what the spell Riddikulus would have worked like - to take your biggest fear and concentrate on thinking of something funny while casting the spell. I don’t know why I keep going back to Harry Potter at my lowest points but the more I do, I realise that it was written by a middle aged woman who was probably experiencing the same issues and learning to deal with them.

#dark academia #spilled ink #harry potter #jk rowling #light academia #anxi4ty #spellbook #midnight ramblings #therapy thoughts #expecto patronum #chaotic academia #marauders #remus lupin

[alicerader]

#relatable memes #mental health #lol #therapy thoughts #penne pasta #emotional eating