#then there are the posts that awaken a maternal instinct in me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

brazenautomaton · 3 years

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Given that you are literally the perfect candidate for this, I request your assistance. In light of recent animu viewings, and upon stumbling across the TVTropes page for Princess the Hopeful, I was inspired to run a few sessions for my boys. However, digging back through your blog, I found a post indicating you had some fairly negative feelings on the system. As I trust your judgment, I would like your input on How To Make Princess Work, whether these suggestions are thematic and/or mechanical.

well I can't be as helpful as you would think because after a certain point the instinctive shame was too much and I can't even bear to read the current version of it so I don't know what to say "don't do this" other than "don't do anything that was Earthscorpion's idea". I asked someone to read it and summarize for me but then they just didn't do that.

and some of it was mechanical stuff you can't change, and probably the most important one was the post about nightmares as the primary environment, which I can't find now because of course I can't and now I am thinking maaaaaybe I never actually detailed it outside of PM?

the primary environment and source of low-level threat is a Nightmare, which is a little sub-reality bubble created by one person's fear and misery, operating under dream logic, where spirit creatures that are manifestations of that person's fears and flaws dwell, and the person is both the prisoner and monarch, exalted and tormented. the nightmare creatures go out into the world and hurt people and try to bring them back in, so that's the first source of monsters of the week. to put a stop to them you need to find the source, the Nightmare itself, and free whoever is trapped inside. the Nightmare reflects their fear and trauma and etc and you need to at least somewhat understand it to free the person, because you need to convince them they can and should leave. also because the nightmare creatures aren't self-aware it's a situation where starting a fight doesn't mean the end of social interaction; some challenges have to be talked through and some have to be fought and maybe you're doing both at once because the talky creatures don't notice or care you're fighting the gibbering monster creatures and you need to get past both to get to the core

yes, there's a lot of Madoka in that, but when Princess was first conceived Madoka didn't exist so it gets to catch up

higher level antagonists use and exploit these Nightmares. Princesses of Tears drive people to this point on purpose because like Kyubey harvests magical girl despair, the energy released by awakening a Nightmare is what keeps the lights on in Alhambra for a little while longer. evil warlocks use them as a source of disposable minions.

things are bad, it is a World of Darkness, because everything is tainted by Darkness. the taint of the Darkness is not Blizzard fel corruption or sinister black mind control oil -- the taint of the Darkness is fear. people do bad things because they are afraid. if an antagonist isn't cackling and unapologetically evil and clearly Okay To Kill, their actions are motivated at some basic level by fear. set them up so they can be redeemed and helped because a Princess is about fighting fear and balming misery. but also that redeeming them will take away most of their evil powers so that the group doesn't just accumulate a larger and larger posse of warlocks to stomp everything.

Dark Magical Girls should always be able to be redeemed. Ignore whatever stupid fucking subsystem EarthScorpion put into Princesses of Storms that kills them if they turn good, whether it's still the stupid organ implants or he changed it to something else. Basically anything that is a unique subsystem just for them was probably EarthScorpion's idea, he was obsessed with them for some reason

give players lots of opportunities to interact with higher-level antagonists before they are in a situation where one of them has to die, so they can get to know the antagonist better.

never imperil a character's civilian-life relationships unless they have fucked up super hard or you have given them ample, ample chances to prevent it from becoming a problem -- you cannot make it so the best idea is to cut yourself off from your friends so they won't be in danger, that's what lonely and isolated and terrified Dark Magical Girls do

the Queens are maternal figures who cannot give advice relevant to the situation on the ground (can't solve problems for you) but help you work them out yourself (they would love to do more but the dream-state they are in makes it hard to operate on anything but dream-logic)

Princesses are not evil, Queens are not evil, there is no "oh no you're so morally grey maybe you're the bad guys" because that is covered by every other WoD game. the darkness level of the game is keyed off of "how much does it matter that you're truly and righteously good guys? will that help you change things?"

this does not preclude them from getting into conflict with other forces who believe themselves to be or truly are motivated by goodness, but play up how that's a tragic thing that people who want to help the world have to fight

I also had a thing where Princesses basically gambled Belief the way Hunters gambled Willpower, to represent getting extremely emotionally invested in what you were doing and the possibility of being spiritually crushed if you try your hardest and fail. this was a way to get fucking super amped up EX modes on your Charms but not knowing how their system works I can't say how to adapt it

one other mechanical thing I wanted was "a Princess is basically invincible if she's devoting all her juice to keep herself safe, but has very little capacity to actually do anything else; the more effective you want to be at actively doing things to the world, the more you have to put yourself out there and risk being harmed" but again don't know how to integrate that into whatever mechanics they have

if I think of anything else I will let you know

#princess the hopeful

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olivish · 3 years

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Some thoughts about Melanie Cavill and her beautiful mind.

I agree with others that Mel is neurodivergent/ autistic. I think this helps explain her passion and focus, and also why, in S1, she was so adept at “putting on a mask” and pretending to be someone else. Basically, I think she had been masking in some way or another her entire life, so when the time came to create the “Hospitality Melanie” persona, it was already second nature.

I think this also explains why it took Melanie so long to see Wilford for the monster he is, and why he was able to control/ manipulate her for most of her life, despite her superior intelligence. On that note, here are some of my MC HCs (I hope it goes without saying, I don’t mean to imply that anything described below is necessarily an “autistic” trait. This is simply how I imagine Melanie the person, who also happens to have autism.)

1. Before meeting Wilford, Melanie struggled to find her place in the world. She dropped out of high school because she was bored with the lessons and couldn’t be bothered to complete assignments. She had no friends, and most adults wrote her off as a trouble-maker.

Her family was poor, so she “borrowed” things they needed for the farm (some of them rather LARGE things), which earned her a juvenile record for theft.

2. Because of this, Melanie believed she’d never go to college. That was fine, she thought, she wouldn’t fit in there. She didn’t fit in anywhere. The only person who didn’t make her feel like a misfit was her father, John Cavill, who was a patient man who loved farming, and who taught his daughter everything he knew about the trade.

It wasn’t long, however, before John ran out of knowledge to share. Melanie was 8 when her father took her to the local library. “So,” he said. “What do you want to know?”

“Everything.”

From that moment on, John watched his daughter surpass him in every subject, every field of study. It was hard, not because he was prideful, but because it felt like he was losing her. But not completely. At least, not yet.

Because for years after that, Melanie would seek her father out, and she’d talk at length about the topics that interested her, and he listened, enjoying her company, even after he ceased to understand a single word that came out of her mouth.

I mean that literally.

“Certains nématodes posent problème en agriculture parce qu'ils parasites des plantes ou des animaux d'élevage, mais la plupart stimulent la croissance en améliorant le cycle des nutriments.” “Mellie.” “Oui, papa?” “You’re speaking French again.” “Oh. Sorry.”

3. Melanie’s mother was a different story. Shanon Cavill, nee Shanon O’Connell, was stern, intelligent and, due to an undiagnosed mood disorder, emotionally unstable. She’d lose her temper at the drop of a hat, and although she loved her daughter, she didn’t understand her. Shanon didn’t understand why someone so brilliant was throwing her life away. Dropping out of school, getting arrested, fooling around with boys, and girls, who didn’t care about her, and who only got her into trouble.

Shanon said many words in the heat of many moments that she could never take back. Foolish. Reckless. Lazy. Quitter.

The day Joseph Wilford showed up at the farm looking for Melanie, Shanon peered at him through the porch screen door. “Did she steal something from you?” she asked. “Because whatever it is, we can’t pay you back, so you’d best just leave before I let the dogs out.”

Looking back, Wilford deeply regrets not heeding the lady Cavill’s advice.

4. Melanie saw Wilford as her missing piece. Melanie always knew she was “bad with people”. To her, human beings were confounding black boxes. INPUT > [???] > UNEXPECTED RESULT, USUALLY BAD.

But Wilford. Joseph Wilford was a social magician! She watched in awe. Everyone adored him. He’d tell a joke and everyone laughed. Anything they needed for their work - funding, IP rights, permits, materials, labor - he procured through sheer force of charisma.

He was just like her, except he had that one missing piece.

It was the apparent gap in their interpersonal skills that led Melanie to conclude that she could never be a leader like him. That’s why she allowed Wilford to take credit for her work, why she believed him when he said it was better for all involved if she remained a ‘silent partner.’

That’s also why she never tried to run Snowpiercer as herself. Despite having all the skills, Melanie couldn’t imagine anyone would follow her leadership.

(I think she was wrong about that...)

5. It was Wilford who sent Melanie to college, and it was Wilford who coached her on how to “mask.” As a sociopath, nearly all of Wilford’s social interactions are theatre. They have to be. So when he met Melanie, he immediately saw what her problem was - the silly girl wasn’t acting!

So he sat her down one day and gave her a gift. “A chess game?” she said.

“Not a game. This box contains the secret to the universe.”

She smiled, but he was serious. As Wilford set up the pieces he explained, “This is the whole world. Every type of person you’ll ever meet is here. Pawns, knights, bishops. They all have their rules, their own little scripts. The trick is, figure them out, while revealing nothing about yourself.”

She didn’t understand, but in time, she would. Wilford taught her how to survive, but not as herself. He taught her to hide, to blend in, and to trust nobody but him.

And it worked, to a certain extent. Melanie earned degrees from MIT and Yale, graduating with the highest honors, lauded as a prodigy. A recruiter from NASA asked if she’d be interested in applying for the astronaut program. Elon Musk asked the same thing, but he offered more money.

Melanie could have worked anywhere. Done anything. But she went back to Wilford, partly out of loyalty, and partly because she believed he was the only person in the world who truly knew her, and saw her, and valued her for who she was.

They weren’t lovers, but Melanie considered him just as close. For many years, he was her one partner and closest friend.

6. When Melanie got pregnant with Alex, she was afraid she’d be a bad mother. She worried that she wouldn’t have that mysterious ‘maternal instinct’ that seemed to come naturally to other women. She thought maybe she was “broken” in a very particular way and shouldn’t be a parent.

Those worries disappeared once Alex was born. More than that, Melanie’s deep connection with Alex made her consider that maybe she’d underestimated herself. In motherhood, Melanie found courage. She built stronger friendships with Ben & Jinju, and she began to interact with Wilford on a more equal footing.

She started speaking up about things she never dared interfere with before. She didn’t like the company’s environmental practices. Their anti-union stances. Their parental leave policies were atrocious. Wilford was beside himself. He didn’t recognize her. He couldn’t wrap his mind around what happened.

At a loss, Wilford blamed his catch-all word for human behavior that fell outside his bounds of understanding.

“Sentimentality.”

7. When Melanie lost Alex, she lost faith in herself. It wasn’t just the grief, or the guilt, though those were enormous. Melanie understood now: Alex was her missing piece. Alex was the one thing that made Melanie feel like she could do anything.

It cannot be overstated what a colossal blunder it was for Wilford to return Melanie’s superpower to her. He thought he was being clever in saving Alex, but from the moment Melanie blew up Big Alice’s connector and Alex gave her that grudging look of respect, all bets were off.

Melanie remembered who she was. The awakening started with Layton, but it ended with Alex.

Final thoughts: Melanie’s particular neurology has been a hot-button issue in the past, so I’m a little nervous posting this. Please reach out to me with any comments or concerns. Everything here is written with an open heart in good faith, and while I’m allergic to argument, I am addicted to discussion. <3

#Snowpiercer #fanfiction #hc

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yurochka-kun · 7 years

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me: [wakes up]

me: holy shit i love yuri plisetsky so much oh my god what the fukc

#i love him.......so much #he awakened all the maternal instincts i had somewhere in me #yuri plisetsky #yurio #yoi #text post

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romana73 · 5 years

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KYLO REN AND DARTH VADER: PARALLEL AND DIFFERENCES

Post written by ME. The animated gifs shown AREN’T MINE and DON’T BELONG TO ME IN ANY WAY

“[…] Show me again the power of the darkness, and I’ll let nothing stand in our way. Show me, grandfather, and I will finish what you started”

(Ben Solo/Kylo Ren at the Darth Vader mask, from “Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens” movie)

“You’re afraid… that you will never be a strong as Darth Vader”

(Rey to Kylo Ren, from “Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens” movie)

WHAT has to complete Kylo Ren that Vader has started? One thing could be killing all Jedi, begun by Vader with Order 66 execution, implanted in clones themselves. Let’s not forget Kylo Ren nicknamed is “Jedi Killer” and Anakin, who became Darth Vader, KILLS ALL CHILDREN OF JEDI’S TEMPLE. UNDERLINED, CHILDREN who knew him and had TRUST in him:

Kylo Ren also kills children, he does this immediately, on his debut in “Star Wars. Episode VII. The Force Awakens” when, after capturing Poe, he gives order to kill ALL villagers and this means WOMEN, CHILDREN and ELDERLY INCLUDED. The reason Kylo gives this order is easy to understand: simply, it isn’t about leaving witnesses in life, who can speak. Pure military tactic. Here there is a small difference: Kylo IMPROVES order PERFORMED, concretely, by Phasma and her soldiers. Anakin/Darth Vader kills CHILDREN WITH HIS SAME HANDS. The FUNDAMENTAL difference between Anakin/Vader, Ben Solo/Kylo Ren and Rey is ANAKIN was LOVED, while to Ben/Kylo and Rey family love was deliberately DENIED. Until 10 age, Anakin lived with his mother Shmi Skywalker, who loved him so much he was free to fulfill his destiny as Jedi:

Obi - Wan Kenobi loved Anakin like a brother and, after years, Anakin was able to fulfill his love dream with Padmè, who completely returned his feelings… what didn’t work? To drop Anakin, redeeming him blind and manipulated by Palpatine was FEAR of losing LOVE. Yoda always repeats it: FEAR leads to DARK SIDE:

“[…] The fear of loss is a path to the dark side.” (Yoda to Anakin Skywalker, from “Star Wars Episode III: The Revenge of the Sith” movie)

Perdity fear crept into Anakin with Shmi’s death, who broke his heart, allowing to enter into him guilt, FURY and… HATE. Anakin saw, in fact, in Obi - Wan Kenobi SCAPEGOAT…

“It’s all Obi-Wan’s fault. He’s jealous. He’s holding me back”

(Anakin Skywalker at Padmé Admidala, from “Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones” movie)

Shmi’s death is breaking point between Anakin and Obi - Wan. Before tragedy happened, Anakin had recurrent nightmares about his mother. Dreams he told Obi - Wan, but master had minimized, reducing everything to Anakin’s homesickness. I’m convinced realization if he had listened to his instinct and not rationality, represented by Obi - Wan, he would arrive in time to save his mother, split Anakin: boy will have given first and foremost, blame to himself and, then, at Obi - Wan. The repetition of a situation and similar dreams with Padmè, will have resurrected in Anakin that resentment, in fact, asks for help to Yoda, from which unfortunately he doesn’t receive desired response. Only Palpatine seems to give Anakin what he wants, chance to become so powerful, although, price is high, Anakin SELLS HIS SOUL TO PALPATINE and does it for LOVE…

My opinion is, however, already on that occasion, Anakin has shown his nature tended strongly towards Dark Side … during picnic with Padmè, young Jedi expresses a political idea, Padmé’s word, it looks MUCH like a DICTATION:

“We need a system where the politicians sit down and discuss the problems, agree what’s in the best interests of all the people, and then do it.”

“That is exactly what we do. The trouble is that people don’t wlways agree. In fact, they hardly ever do”

“Then they should be made to” […]

“That sounds an awful lot like a dictatorship to me”

“Well, if it works…”

(Anakin Skywalker and Padmé Admidala, from "Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones” movie)

Following Shmi’s death, then, Anakin kills NOT only her captors and torturers, but also WOMEN and CHILDREN belonging to that people:

“ I… I killed them. I killed them all. They’re dead… every single one of them. And not just the men. But the women… and the children, too. They’re like animals, and I slaughtered them like animals! I HATE THEM!”

(Anakin Skywalker and Padmé Amidala, from “Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones” movie)

Ben Solo/Kylo Ren’s path to Dark Side stems from OPPOSITE assumption: Anakin feared to lose love he had. At one point, to Ben/Kylo, that love is MISSED. The boy was denied same MATERNAL, FAMILY LOVE Anakin/Vader had know. Without disturbing novels arising from movies, it’s enough to listen to dialogue between Leia and Han Solo in “Star Wars. Episode VII. The Force Awakens” to understand Ben Solo was ABANDONED BY HIS PARENTS, who were AFRAID OF DARK SIDE in him. In short, Ben Solo was seen to REFUSE OPENLY by two people who gave him life and, more than anyone else, they should have helped him, supported him and struggled for him. Fear of Dark Side prevailed, instead, in Leia and Han who preferred to REMOVE their own child, under pretext of entrusting HIM to Uncle Luke, great Jedi…

“THERE’S NOTHING MORE WE COULD HAVE DONE. There’s too much Vader in him”

“That’s why I wanted him to train with Luke. I JUST NEVER SHOULD HAVE SENT HIM AWAY. That’s when I lost him. That’s when I lost you both”

“We both had to deal with it in our own way. I went back to the only thing I was ever any good at”

“We both did”

(Han Solo and Leia Organa about Ben Solo/Kylo Ren, from “Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens” movie)

The fact wound is still open in Ben/Kylo’s heart is proves his affirmation of Han, which he made during interrogation with Rey:

“[…] I see the island… and Han Solo… You feel like he’s the father you never had. He would have disappointed you”

(Ben Solo/Kylo Ren to Rey, from “Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens” movie)

LOST, ABANDONED, REJECTED BY THE FAMILY, for Kylo it was almost an logical choice and only surrender to Dark Side, addressing only beings and people who accepted him and offered him A PLACE TO BELONG: Snoke taking Kylo as his apprentice and head of Star Killer Base and Knights of Ren, of which Kylo is a Master. However, after killing Han, when Rey asks him why he hated him, Kylo says he DIDN’T HATE him and this also confirms Kylo’s EMOTION, (suitably NOT HANDLED by anyone), while performing infamous gesture:

The same TEARS streak his face when, entering Resitance’s empty refuge, Kylo finds Han’s famous dice:

Nevertheless, until a few seconds ago, Kylo was determined to kill ALL, including Rey and Leia. Unlike Kylo, lost duel on Mustafar, Anakin/Vader SHOUT ALL HATE to Obi - Wan:

“Why did you hate your father? […]”

“I didn’t hate him”

(Rey and Kylo Ren, from “Star Wars, Episode VIII, The Last Jedi” movie)

This is a second big difference between Anakin/Vader and Ben Solo/Kylo Ren. Vader hates and blames others, especially Obi Wan ‘cause what happened to his mother and Padmé’s faté, seeing betrayal where there isn’t:

“You turned her against me!”

“You have done that yourself!”

“YOU WILL NOT TAKE HER FROM ME!!!”

“Your anger and your lust for power have already done that”

(Anakin/Vader and Obi - Wan Kenobi about Padmé Amidala, from “Star Wars Episode III: The Revenge of the Sith” movie)

Kylo Ren has suffered, however, TRUE BETRAYALS and ABANDON, of which one who broke him was attempt of Uncle Luke Skywalker, famous Jedi, hero of galaxies, wanted to kill him in his sleep… nevertheless, except for Luke , Kylo doesn’t hate his parents. He killed Han, his father, NOT to please Snoke, as he makes believe when he says he gave everything to Dark Side, but to “kill the past” and become what he’s destined to become… in this “kill the past” you hear distant echo of a well-known Jedi teaching, which Kylo distorts and leads to extreme: ATTACHMENT IS PROHIBITED to a Jedi:

“[…] Attachment leads to jealousy, the shadow of greed, that is"

“What must I do, Master Yoda?”

“Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose”

(Yoda and Anakin Skywalker, from “Star Wars Episode III: The Revenge of the Sith” movie)

in this twisted way, Kylo EXCEED Anakin/Vader… Kylo Ren gets to kill all those to whom he can feel attachment. Not surprisingly, having received Finn and Poe escape’s news, Kylo says dryly he said it was better to take CLONES as troops. This is ‘cause Clones are FREE of unnecessary feelings and emotions. In a moment of exaltation, then, Anakin/Vader confides Padmé to feel more powerful than Palpatine and to plan to kill him, to reign with her:

“[…] I am more powerful than the Chancellor, I can overthrow him. And together you and I can rule the galaxy. Make things the way we want them to be […]”

(Anakin Vader in Padmé, from “Star Wars Episode III: The Revenge of the Sith” movie)

A few minutes later Anakin kills Padmé and finds himself mutilated and burned… his wife’s loss attacks him and, instead, rebels against Palpatine, Vader submits himself to him completely. On contrary, Kylo never says he wants to kill Snoke, except when he rebels fed up with being humiliated by him:

Unlike famous grandfather, Ben/Kylo finds STRENGTH and WAY of KILLING SNOKE, in his relationship with Rey and in desire to save him from his cruel master. Rey ignored Ben/Kylo’s plans and these seem more genuine and instinctive than those of his grandfather. We can conclude, yes, Ben/Kylo has succeeded where Anakin/Vader had failed, and yet… most tragic moment, but also that which demonstrated Vader’s MAXIMUM POWER, entrance to Jedi Temple, coincides with Kylo Ren entry into Resistance’s refuge, which represents his maximum DEFEAT:

At that moment, Vader is at height of his power and he easily succeeds in all tasks Palpatine has ordered him… Kylo Ren sees, however, everything WASTE in his hands: he didn’t kill Luke, the last Jedi, ‘cause he was just an astral projection:

The moment he enters, Resistance’s refuge is empty. All the Rebels, including Rey and Leia are safe on Falcon. Escaped from him, Rey closes connection and every relationship with Kylo, slamming Falcon’s door in his face:

Finally, even Han Solo dice turns out to be a mere illusion, which fades into Kylo’s hands, leaving him alone and DESOLATE:

#anakin skywalker #ben solo #darth vader #han solo #kylo ren #leia organa #palpatine #parallels #rey #reylo #star wars #supreme leader snoke

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annalyticall · 3 years

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My tagging system is actually very complex it's just that no one can make sense of it but me

#most of my favorite characters have a specialized tag if there's a theme about them #rhys has 'this loser'#hawks has 'bastard bird man whom i love'#clem has 'oh my darling'#ones that double as dads usually have two #aizawa has 'dadzawa' and 'i love one (1) hobo teacher'#reigen has 'disaster dad' and 'i love one (1) sweaty con man'#nanamin has 'nanadad' and 'i love one (1) tired salaryman'#iida somehow achieved two without dad status with 'square son' and 'iida is so underrated'#then there are non-ship group tags of which there are many #the caravan crew from tftbl is 'loser squad'#aizawa and shinso is 'like father figure like son figure'#reigen and the kids are 'reigen and his pack of middle schoolers'#deku iida and todoroki are 'my BOYS' while deku iida and uraraka are 'the kids'#fiona and sasha is 'sisters!'#aizawa and deku is 'problem child'#then there are the posts that awaken a maternal instinct in me #tagged as either 'baby boy. baby' or 'baby girl. baby'#that's all on top of actual character name tags #oh god it's a mess but it's MY mess #makes it easy for me to go through a bunch of posts of say... rhys being a loser if a mood strikes

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sueboohscorner · 6 years

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The 100 Ep 510 Recap "The Warriors Will" #The100

This episode was thrilling, and I didn't see the twists coming at all, but like any good twist, everything that happened made perfect sense and derived from the characters. I went into the episode expecting to see Gaia fall in the arena and probably Indra too, just hoping desperately that something would happen to save Indra at the last minute. I could never have seen it coming that Monty would be the hero Wonkru deserved. I also didn't see it coming that Octavia would go full Roman emperor and decide that it's okay to become the villain if your people no longer treat you as a hero!

And no lie, I miss Octavia. Blodreina is a nightmare of a person, and I loved Octavia, for all her faults, for four+ seasons (her ascent to Blodreina was the last we saw of her). I see a lot of fans bitching online, and I suspect that what it comes down to is that they loved Octavia too much to accept this version of her, so they're angry at the show. I've been there, where a direction the creators took a character made them so fundamentally different from the person I thought they were, I disconnected from the overall experience. The 100 is beyond that for me; I am fully invested in the world of the show, and I believe the changes they make have always been explicable and internally consistent.

Just as you could see the seeds of Finn's instability long before he gunned down a village, and the clues that Bellamy didn't trust Grounders as much as his loved ones did long before he joined forces with Pike, and the signs of Jasper's fragility long before he started acting overtly suicidal, Octavia's rage, insecurity, and need for unconditional approval have been laid in as fundamental character traits from the beginning. What we're seeing now is the end result of someone whose worst instincts and basest needs were not merely indulged but encouraged for a very long time, and now suddenly. The same people who eagerly followed her are turning their backs, triggering all the fears of abandonment and rejection she has nurtured throughout her life, and her reaction is proportional to how long and how fully her needs had been met till now.

So with the reaction out of the way, let's cover the action!

Clarke and Madi have gotten well away from Polis while Madi continued to sleep off her post-Ascension hangover. When Madi awakens, she's royally pissed that Clarke has spirited her away from her people, because the spirit of the Commander has increasingly taken hold--that will continue throughout the episode, and it's good to watch Clarke lose her confident certainty that she's in charge here, much as we watched Abby experience in Season 2. Madi is also experiencing the memories of past Commanders in her dreams, and the revelation that Becca was burned at the stake possibly tells us why the chip is called the Flame in the first place, as it was presumably all that remained of her after.

Clarke also dumps out the worm eggs from the Rover, for some reason leaving them in a wriggling pile rather than setting them on fire or something...seriously, I would have found some way to destroy them rather than leaving them there to grow into nightmare creatures, but Clarke isn't great on long-term planning these days.

The closer Clarke and Madi get to the valley, the more heated their discord becomes over what to do with the Flame. Clarke keeps making moves to take it out in Madi's sleep, and Madi ultimately promises Clarke that in order to keep her from ascending all over again, Clarke would have to destroy the Flame. Because that means killing what's left of Lexa, that's a no-go for Clarke...but I fully believe that if she didn't have a personal connection to an element of the Flame. She wouldn't hesitate, any more than Abby hesitated when demolishing the radiation test chamber or interfering in Clarke's attempt at ascending, because Clarke is an overbearing mother from hell. It's a coincidence of competing for self-interest that stands in the way of her maternal instinct to stand in the way of her "daughter's" growth and power.

When they reach the valley, Madi gets another demonstration of Clarke's limited range of concern: McCreary and his goons are killing a bunch of Wonkru defectors, and Madi feels the Commander's impulse to rush in and save her people, but Clarke holds her back. Madi knowingly reminds Clarke that Abby is a defector, too.

Major badassery points to Madi for slitting the throat of a McCreary underling rather than letting him talk or possibly find a way to escape while promising to be useful.

They sneak further into the village and find Abby passed out on the floor by her pill bottle. But how she got these pills? That's a fantastic scene!

This season's MVP guest star, Mike Dopud, delivers another stunningly creepy performance this week, as Abby summons him via neck collar shock (his underlying tone of menace as he implicitly threatens her never to do that again is chilling) to beg him for help getting a fix. McCreary cut her off, and she's in such withdrawal that she insists she will literally die without more pills...who knows how true that is, but her need is evident regardless.

Vinson returns later with a plentiful supply, and he brightly says he knows what's it like to need things as he indulges his own need--the desire to rip a couple of dudes' throats out with his damn teeth!

Abby's subsequent overdose may be partially a result of taking too much after waiting so long to have any, partially the response of emotional horror after what she's just witnessed.

But that's it for the valley, so let's move on to Polis! We came into the week with the knowledge that one or even two major characters would die in the area. The deadpool greatly favored Bellamy to be last man standing, but no one was ready to lose Indra. No one except Octavia, who chooses Bellamy.

Octavia first goes to Indra, begging for help to find a solution that will allow her to maintain absolute control over Wonkru without carrying out the sentence according to Wonkru tradition. Indra points out there's no other way, it's Octavia's own fault, and by the way, I'm going to kill your brother first, so my daughter is certain to survive, so the hell with you.

So Octavia goes to Monty and asks him to convey a message to Bellamy about Indra's weaknesses, and he's like, Nope, this is your fault and your problem, and anyway, you can choose to change your entire plan because of my dope botany skills that will save Wonkru without having to go to war!

Then Octavia gives in and talks to Bellamy herself, and it's one of the greatest scenes of the series. She reminisces about one of the many times he put her safety above all other concerns back on the Ark, and she begs him to kill Indra and Gaia so he can survive. The emotional weight of their relationship is so powerful, so beautifully carried by these two brilliant actors who have built their connection over the past five years.

Rebuffed by Bellamy, the final rejection, Octavia goes away, slices open her arm in the exact place Bellamy once cut himself to protect her and uses the blood as her warpaint.

It's arena time, and Bellamy holds out as long as he can, trying to be a conscientious objector, but survival instinct kicks in, compelling him to fight back. The battle is intense, and Indra is getting a number of good slashes in, but Gaia changes the game!

Gaia picks up a spear and prays to the spirit of the Commander as she hurls it straight at Octavia! Bellamy's instinct to protect his sister is ever-powerful, and he knocks Gaia off balance, causing her aim to go foul.

In this moment, Octavia has the opportunity to end the fight, execute Gaia for attempted regicide, and pardon Bellamy for his act of saving her life, then exile Indra because she'd definitely never forgive Gaia's death...but of course, that's not what happens. Octavia just pretends not to be rattled by this near-death moment, tosses the spear back into the arena, and commands the fight to continue.

But here comes Monty, the hero we needed, the hero we deserve! He bursts into the arena with proof of his success growing new plants, and he announces to Wonkru that Octavia is lying to them! They don't have to go to war--it's not their only chance at survival, and she knows it because he's shown her how he's revived the hydrofarm! They could stay and survive and use the same technique to recultivate the land outside over time.

This revelation is all Wonkru needed to turn against their Red Queen (many of them were at the tipping point anyway, because they wanted their new true Commander to take her place!). Monty and Bellamy are heady with the joy of stopping this nightmare, but they quickly grow worried when no one knows where Octavia has disappeared to.

Their search is short-lived because a fire alarm tells them exactly where she is and what she's done. She's set the hydrofarm ablaze, destroying any hope for the future that didn't involve following her into war. Even Miller looks disillusioned with her now.

But hey, it worked...for her selfish purposes. She has deprived them of any other option besides carrying out her initial plan. The rations they have now are the last food they will ever have unless they can take the valley.

A dispirited, morose army marches out of Polis, and there's only one thing keeping them from murdering Octavia at this point: She's an incredibly strong warrior, and they can't afford to sacrifice an asset like that. Which brings us back to the heart of the series in a neat little way--The 100 has always valued people based on one thing: Are you helping your people survive, or bringing them closer to death?

10/10 (I'd give it an 11 if I could. Can I?)

#The 100 #The CW #Mike Dopud

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zoilathemom-blog · 6 years

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stuff i wish i knew

Dakota was not planned. In fact, Zach and me were very much mending ourselves back together when we found out I was pregnant. We intended to have a baby at some point, but Winter 2018 was not penciled into our agenda. When we got the news there was no question. We were doing this, we’d made it 10 years at that point and had survived a 6 month separation, we could handle anything. And let me tell you, we really can handle anything.

Thank goodness we trusted our path because we are so in love with our little human. Dakota is a blessing, the perfect combination of us both and I am so excited for our life as Dakota’s parents. BUT I’d be a lying fool and a faker if I pretended my pregnancy wasn’t riddled with what ifs, doubts and confusion. Even more so, being a mother is terrifying - I’m constantly wondering if I’m fucking up. And the truth is, I probably am. But also, that’s OK.

My time as a pregnant woman was quite isolating. You see, we moved to LA in November of 2015 and hadn’t quite solidified a community here. I always imagined this time in my life would be filled with family and my best girl friends. It wasn’t. So I did what women do best, I adapted. With constant check-ins on my “Mothers.” chat - a group chat of 3 amazing girlfriends who are moms, advice from my mother and a lot of reading, I made it to motherhood. But that was just the beginning, there is still so much for me to learn. Motherhood is like getting to the top of a 5 mile high mountain only to find that the peak is still 15 miles up. Or like that scene in Titanic when they discover the iceberg has a side that juts out and the sailor screams “it’s got a head!” That’s motherhood. Always another step on a constant learning curve. BUT, the reward, the reward is so damn good. The first time Koda smiled a non gas triggered smile? I DIED!!!! Dying just thinking about him. Hold up, now I need to run into his nursery and check that he’s breathing....

OK, back now :)

So, in the spirit of sisterhood and the belief that real talk is the only talk that should exist, I’ve asked for advice. I asked for advice from some of the most amazing moms I know (please take or leave what you’d like - none of this is fact!). I asked them to share what they wish they had known or anything they feel is relevant for first time moms. This will be an ongoing document that I hope mothers will use and share, far and wide. Being a mom is hard. It is scary. It is also incredibly exciting & fulfilling. It is all the damn things and you don’t have to go through it alone. But if you are feeling alone (been there!!), I am here and so is this mama tribe.

On Support:

“Find plenty of moms who have been through it already and cry on their shoulders.” - Marti Cuevas; Mama to Martin Carle, 39 and me :)

“My advice is to reach out to other moms, either friends w kids or try to make some. Talking out weird questions or just being able to relate is so key.” -Kristina; Mama to Isabel, 8 Months

“Ask for what you need. Your partner or anyone around you for that matter cannot read your mind. Be vocal and direct.” - Zoila; Mama to Dakota, 3 Months

On Post Partum Bodies:

“I wanted to lose the baby weight right away, in my head, but it wasn’t until my son was 18 months that I felt my post-C-section body was ready and able. Everyone said breast feeding will make the weight drop on it’s own; well not for my P.C.O.S.-ridden reproductive system. My advice to first-time moms is to not succumb to the pressure of obsessing over baby weight loss. Follow your heart, mind and body on your post-partum journey back to your pre-pregnancy jeans.” - Rachel Muniz-Strauss; Mama to Donovan, 3 + one on the way.

On Self-Care:

“Don’t put undue pressure on yourself! We do that so much and it serves no one. You are a fabulous mama.” - Sadye; Mama to Rafi, 2

“New moms should do ONE thing a day. Like if it’s going to the store or a doctors appointment or whatever. One thing! Healing after labor and delivery or a cesarean birth takes time emotionally, physically, and spiritually! Over exertion is no bueno when dealing with a baby and a partner who is also struggling to find his or her place in the new family unit as well as probably recovering from the birth!” - Scotlan; Mama to Clementine, 11 Months

“BREATHE: things are going to get super hectic and really noisy. You will get hit with a poop explosion, loud crying and screaming, dinner burning on the stove, phone ringing, your partner asking "hey did you do the laundry yet?", while you have been holding your pee in for the last 3 hours cause you've been running around the house like a chicken without a head trying to do it all...You start to panic...but DON'T! JUST BREATHE and don't cram it all in at once...this is a recipe for ANXIETY. Yes you are a super hero and a bionic woman but you can't do everything at once. So stop for a minute and breathe, even if you have to lock yourself in the bathroom for 10 minutes...let the baby cry, let hubby figure it out and BREATHE...in through your nose and out through your mouth and tell yourself "I GOT THIS"..then go out there and conquer each thing one by one with a huge smile on your face... I know it's so simple but trust me it will save you a world of anxiety” - Byata; Mama to Luca, 6, London, 5 & Lucky, 11 Months

ACCEPT HELP. While being a new mom is certainly a sensory awakener, and a super cool and interesting experience that you wanna soak up all to yourself, you MUST accept help, especially from those with some wisdom and experience, and if someone whom you trust offers to watch the baby while you shower or nap, ACCEPT! - Cashley; Mama to Jacob 14, Nicky 11, Sophia 2

“SLEEP: every mom I have ever received advice from tried to sell me this little bit of information and guess what...I did not buy it! A sleep deprived mama is an unhappy, unhealthy, and uncomfortable mama. When that baby is sleeping, lay your ass down and close your eyes. Being rested allows you to be productive and allows you to be happy and healthy. When you are sleep deprived you make poor food choices (typically lots of sugar to keep you awake) which lead to a poor mood...and when mama is in a bad mood, everyone suffers! So try and sleep...the laundry will wait, the dishes will wait, the dinner will wait, your partner will wait, the whole world will wait for you to wake up!” - Byata; Mama to Luca, 6, London, 5 & Lucky, 11 Months

On “The Way Things Are Done:”

“I would advise not to share with others the name choice for your child. I feel that it should be between you and your partner (if there is one) as you are the parents, and deserve 100% creative control, if I may, in naming your child. I’ve found that when sharing my top name choices, the opinions of others really Jaded me (since when?!) BUT, while I love the names I gave my kids, I wish I had been more private on that aspect.” - Cashley; Mama to Jacob 14, Nicky 11, Sophia 2

“Breastfeeding is INCREDIBLY hard. If it does not come naturally to you, rest easy knowing you are not a mutant who can’t provide for their child. Almost every woman struggles with some aspect of breastfeeding. It doesn’t really start to feel normal until after the 3rd month. Don’t beat yourself up. Also, if you don’t want to breastfeed, that is your choice too and NO ONE has the right to shame you for it.” - Zoila; Mama to Dakota, 3 Months

“Your choice for Feeding source.. I 100% think should be kept as personal as possible. We all go into this mom thing with an idea of what we want to do, or not, but often times as I now know, things don’t go according to plan with regards to really anything, but especially nursing... lactation issues, latching or lack thereof, allergies, your schedule…. , or formula feeding may just be your personal preference... so regarding nursing vs formula, I found it best to keep mum. Everyone has an opinion, but do what your maternal instinct tells you.” - Cashley; Mama to Jacob 14, Nicky 11, Sophia 2

“Be patient with trial and error. Things that might work for your best friend might not work with your family. Flexibility and letting go of the idea that parenting should “look” a certain way” - Scotlan; Mama to Clementine, 11 Months

“SOMETIME'S LET THE BABY CRY: babies are designed to cry! It actually helps strengthen their vocal chords. I remember with baby # 1 I would be on the toilet while he was napping and I would hear him wake up and cry his little heart out and I would get up without finishing my business; run, trip, fall just to get to him as quickly as possible and help stop him from crying! No need for all that...take care of your shit mama! (NO PUN INTENDED) That baby won't brake. That baby will be fine! A few extra bouts of crying won't change anything. Yes it sounds painful and you want nothing more than to nurture your baby and protect it...but a little crying is OK...I promise.” - Byata; Mama to Luca, 6, London, 5 & Lucky, 11 Months

Tricks & Products That Save Lives:

“BABY WEARING: is a game changer! I can't begin to tell you how much this practice works. Especially for my super busy super moms who like to multi task...when you wear that baby in an Ergo or a MOBY Wrap (two of my faves), you can do anything you need to around the house, at the store, or outside...that baby is happy to be snuggled up against you, and you're happy that you can knock out a few birds with one stone. Your hands are free to type, clean dishes, make dinner, talk on the phone, fold laundry, speed walk, etc...(all in standing posItion - which is great for your back anyways!) I literally pull a 4 hour work shift out of the house just by wearing my baby. He's happy and I am getting shit done!!! - Byata; Mama to Luca, 6, London, 5 & Lucky, 11 Months

#motherhood #advice #momlife #moms #newmoms #newborn #mothers #mom life

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clenenart · 4 years

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STUDIO work: CARE series

Unique to this semester’s artwork has been the growing crisis of the Coronavirus pandemic. Even before lockdown I was starting to respond to internal fears of illness which seemed to awaken basic maternal instinct to want to protect my family; these feelings, combined with the rational knowledge that so much is out of my individual control, fed into my practice and the evolution of my CARE series.

Again, a found object was part of the genesis – in this case a domestic First-Aid kit which I have had at home for years; the irony of its uselessness in such a pandemic seemed to symbolise my feelings of impotency and therefore I appropriated the contents of this kit as the key material in CARE. Other key materials chosen for their connotative meaning include a standing screen and plain material adapted to suggest a baby/child’s garment.

The choice of cling-film as a supportive textile was partly practical but mainly an aesthetic choice: the translucency allowed for the delicacy of the medical materials to be more prominent as well as making the screen more of an ambiguous liminal barrier.

Susie Freeman’s work which I have been familiar with for several years (see blog post) probably unconsciously influenced this piece of work.

In CARE (iii) above, I was trying to create a symbolically protective hygienic environment; it then evolved into something more uncomfortably enclosed, sterile and even sinister as it took on the zeitgeist of viral Pandemic.

Another artistic Influence, thanks to my tutor for introducing me to Mary Kelly...

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bollywoodtales · 4 years

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New Post has been published on https://bollywoodtales.com/vidya-balan-paa-awakened-maternal-instinct-in-me/

Vidya Balan: 'Paa' awakened maternal instinct in me

News Vidya Balan: ‘Paa’ awakened maternal instinct in me By TellychakkarTeam 08 Dec 2019 02:00 PM Actress Vidya Balan could not believe that her film “Paa” has completed 10 years since release. Noting how time flies, Vidya got nostalgic and shared what the National Award-winning film meant to her. Directed by R. Balki, “Paa” narrated the story of a 12-year-old boy named Auro (played by Amitabh Bachchan), who suffers from a rare genetic disorder called progeria. In the movie, Abhishek Bachchan played the role of Big B’s father while Vidya Balan was seen as his mother. Revealing how the film

#Bollywood Songs Lyrics

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shielduniversityapps · 5 years

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Scarlet Witch application

OOC INFORMATION:

Name/ Pseudonym: Maddie Age: 23 Preferred Pronouns: she/her

Timezone: GMT

Triggers: Besides the usual (nsfw, gore etc), nothing really. Activity: I try and get on every other day but because of the season and retail, I can get a little busy though I do try to check in.

IC INFORMATION:

Character you’re applying for: Wanda Maximoff Age: 18 FaceClaim: Kaya Scodelario Secondary FaceClaim: Naomi Scott Traits: +Compassionate +Maternal -Uncertain -Hesitant Reformation Stance: Pro Is their Identity known?: Only to SHIELD officials. Identity protected by SHIELD. Class Standing (junior, senior, TA or professor, etc): Senior

Why do you want to play this character?: I have only played Wanda a handful of times so I really want to try my hand at her again. I’ve been a fan since X-Men Evolution and have read a lot of Wanda related stuff. (I’m a sucker for the old Avengers stuff with Wanda in). I just think she can be like a wild card for the group and I like the way I get to write with other characters. Other characters you’d like to play (feel free to leave this blank. we are just curious about what you are interested in): Felicia Hardy, Amora the Enchantress Bio: Wanda’s origin is something that is shrouded with mystery, even to herself. What she does know is that she has her twin brother, Pietro and her adoptive parents, Marya and Django Maximoff and lived in Sokovia. Rumors often circulated the twins, some saying they were children used for testing while others believed them to be the children of a powerful mutant. Either way, Wanda and Pietro lived relatively normal until a mortar shell from Stark Industries imploded into the apartment they lived in, killing their parents. A second shell hit that did not detonate but trapped the twins for two days.

It was then in their time of distress that Wanda’s powers activated, releasing them from the rubble. Both weak and without a home, the two began to travel place to place by foot, living on the move and petty theft to get by. Though they tried to settle, they were often under suspicion for being outsiders where they traveled with Wanda often being persecuted as a witch. For the downfall in their lives, Wanda developed a hatred for Stark Industries and eventually the Avengers, taking part in protests against them.

Wanda managed to make it over to the United States by stowing away on a ship and ended up joining the Brotherhood of Mutants with Pietro. She took part in their activities but swiftly became disillusioned with their purpose and the life they were living. Wanda and Pietro were then captured by SHIELD where Wanda confessed. She was offered a deal; Wanda and Pietro would be pardoned if they joined SHIELD University.

Wanda has been with the program for two years, having resolved her conflicting feelings about America and the Avengers. Still, whether she wants to try and attempt the path of heroism remains to be seen.

Writing Sample: Please make sure all your writing samples are at least 400 words ( two paragraphs), we’ll never turn you away for more, in third person and either past or present tense. Be creative with these and don’t feel limited to just the prompts!! We admins just want to see your handling of the character and your writing style. If you need help with what to write feel to ask for some prompts or guidance, we’re here to help as best we can or choose from the topics here: ( This is something I wrote Post Infinity War for a group )

Had you ever had your heart broken once before by the decisions you made? Ever had it happen twice? Wanda had and, to put it so briefly and simply, she carried that guilt with her none stop. She believed that her doubts and inaction were what had gotten both her brother and lover killed and it broke her heart. So much so, she wasn’t sure how to go on in that moment.

Her hands held the lifeless body of her lover, mourning him as she had an out pour of emotion. She began to feel something beyond that. Wanda’s mysticism attuned her to the forces of the universe not many could understand. Not even she was sure what they were. It was similar to how she could tap into the molecules and properties of the world around her except it was if it was tapping into herself. Feel herself breaking apart on a cellular level, being pulled away from Vision. Her touch no longer mattered as everything faded away.

It was like a sharp shock as she felt herself awaken from what seemed liked floating in a void. “Vision?!” She called out almost instantly as she sat up, as if by instinct, she expected him to be there. She rubbed her head. This world felt different. It looked like Earth but she could, well, ‘feel’ it. Maybe it was her abilities or maybe it was her natural instincts. She looked down to see she was still in costume.

Hearing a crunch of the ground behind her, she flexed her fingers as they glowed with her signature red energy in the direction she heard. “You frightened me.” Wanda finally breathed, her hands dropping back to her sides.

Extra Bits and Bobs: Just some stuff I have on the blog previously like wardrobe choices and aesthetics; [x] [x] [x]

#hero #submission

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