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hughhowey · 2 years

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Writing Insights -- Part One

I started writing my first novel when I was twelve years old. I was thirty-three when I completed my first rough draft. That’s twenty years of wanting to do something and not knowing how. Twenty years of failure and frustrations and giving up.

A big part of the problem is that I didn’t know what I didn’t know. I didn’t know which questions to ask, much less who might have the answers.

These days, people write to me as if I know what I’m doing. Or like I have a shortcut to success. I’m not sure either is true. One thing I’ve learned is that luck plays a massive role. But what I do have are some insights today that I wish I’d had twenty years ago, tips and pointers that might’ve saved me a lot of headache and heartache if I’d known them sooner. Maybe it’ll help some aspiring writer out there if I jot them all down now.

I’m going to share what insights I have in four parts. The first part is a list of all the things I wish I’d known about becoming a writer before I set out. The second part is tips and tricks for completing that first rough draft. In the third part, I discuss the important art of turning a rough draft into something worth reading. And finally, I share some tips on how to get your story out into the world.

These are my insights now that I’ve written over a dozen novels, sold a few million books, been published in over forty languages, and have seen all angles of this complex industry as a reader, bookseller, writer, editor, and publisher. My first novel was published traditionally through a small press; I’ve self-published many on my own; others are with some of the biggest publishers in the world. I give this advice knowing how much it would’ve been worth to me while understanding that it all might be worthless to you. I only have my own experiences and observations. I wish you all the best of luck.

Insight #1: Anyone can become a successful writer; the only person who can stop you is you.

I spent twenty years stopping myself from becoming a successful writer. The biggest obstacle I faced is thinking success meant selling a ton of books, which meant writing something that millions of readers would enjoy. As I began writing my first attempts at a novel, watching the sentences form on the screen, I knew the words weren’t good enough, and so I stopped in order to spare all those readers from what I was writing.

The problem is that I had the definition of “successful writer” all wrong. A successful writer is one who finishes what they start while striving to improve their craft. It’s as simple as that. And the only one who can stop you from doing this is you.

Imagine if NBA all-star Steph Curry attempted to learn to play basketball with a million people watching. Or if the first pickup game he ever played was his only chance to land an agent and get signed to an NBA team. This is the pressure writers put on themselves, and it makes no sense. Basketball players will put all the hustle and energy into a thousand practice games before they ever get a shot at turning pro. Most will spend a dozen years playing almost every day of their lives before they make it onto a high school or college team. Writers should have the same expectations. Perhaps you write a dozen novels before you write one that blows you away or becomes a bestseller. The point is to finish them all. Play all four quarters. Steph Curry played a thousand games to the end before he turned pro. Every game he finished was a success. He didn’t stop himself, and neither should you.

Insight #2: You can’t compare your rough draft to any of the books you’ve read.

If you’re just starting out as a writer, there’s a good chance that you’ve never read a rough draft in your life. So don’t compare what you’re working on to what you’ve read from your favorite authors. Their rough drafts were nowhere near as wonderful and polished as the final product that you loved as a reader and that made you want to become a writer. Just like you, they had to get the words down on the page first. And then they had to go back and rewrite much of what they wrote, several times. At this point, they probably gave it to their spouse or a friend to read, and that person saw lots of room for improvement. Which meant another revision. The same process took place again with their agent. And then their editor. Each time, the rough draft got better and better. So will yours.

The books that made you want to become a writer were rewritten and revised as much as a dozen times, with the input of several other people. You don’t get to see all of the mistakes and boring bits – all of that has been cut away. It’s just like when you take a thousand photos on an epic vacation and only share the thirty or forty very best ones. This is what it takes to be a successful writer: You have to learn how to write the good and the bad all the way until the finish. Trust the revision process. No one will have to see your rough draft but you. And you can’t revise a work to perfection until it already exists. So make it exist.

Insight #3: There is no special qualification required.

I used to think writers belonged to a special club that had all sorts of requirements for admittance. You had to graduate from a special school, or live in the right city, or own a turtleneck. Nothing could be further from the truth. The best writers have the most diverse backgrounds. They come in all ages, all genders, all races, all sexual persuasions. They all have unique things to say. Anyone can be a writer, if they put in the work. Like most things in life, it takes lots of practice. How much practice you get is entirely up to you.

I first started dreaming of being a writer after reading Ender’s Game. I was around twelve years old. This novel blew me away, because the heroes of the story were children my age. It made me think there were no limits to what I could do. At the end of the novel, there was a brief biography of the author, Orson Scott Card. I was shocked to read that he lived in my home state, North Carolina. I always thought writers lived far away in little shacks in the woods or tall glass towers. I always thought kids had to wait to be adults to do amazing things. This book got me thinking that both assumptions might be wrong.

Related to this insight is the idea that there are too many novels out there in the world. This is rubbish. There are always readers agonizing that they can’t find something great to read. Maybe your next book will fill that void for a reader. Or it’ll be the book that leads to the book that fills that void in many other readers. Either way, there should be joy in the act of creation. My mother started knitting for the pure joy, then grew her talents until she was giving away works, then having people pay for them, and then owning and running her own yarn shop. The lady at the farmers’ market you buy tomatoes from started gardening to see if she could. Steph Curry enjoyed shooting hoops with his dad and grew hooked on the sound a perfect swish makes. There is nothing wrong with starting something as a hobbyist and asking for compensation for your art. We can all turn pro whenever we like.

Let the readers decide if you’re worth supporting with their time and money, not the cycicism of other writers who don’t want you playing ball with them.

Insight #4: The best writers are the best readers.

There aren’t any shortcuts around this. Successful writers read. They read a lot. And the best writers read a wide variety of books. It’s impossible to stress the importance of this insight. When aspiring authors ask my advice on making it as a writer, this is my most common first response: Read.

Writing is a lot like singing. There’s a musicality to good writing, and I don’t mean florid writing like you might encounter in a literature course. I mean the simple flow and cadence of sentences, how they run together, how long paragraphs should be, how much dialog to sprinkle among the action (or action among the dialog). Every sentence in this blog post is an example. I listen for the rise and fall of stresses, the iambic pentameter, mixing short punchy sentences with long comma-filled breezy ones. It should come naturally. You don’t want to even be aware that you’re doing it. Eventually you won’t.

Of course, your style will be different than my style. This is called “voice,” and we’ll talk more about voice and constructing sentences in the next part of this series. For now, it’s important to know that you’ll have a very difficult time creating pleasant prose without absorbing years’ worth of it first. Books are like tuning forks. We hear the pleasant ring of words on key, and it helps us recognize when our own pitch is a little off. The avid reader will know when a sentence needs more tinkering.

It would be convenient if we could dismiss this advice and say, “I’m going to write my own way, rules and tuning forks be damned.” But it doesn’t work that way. There are millions of effective voices and styles, but all share a common framework. Just as there are an infinite number of songs in a single guitar, but that guitar needs to be properly tuned. The way we tune our writing instruments is to read, and to read as writers. Recognize sentences that make you smile, or think, or laugh, or cry. Pore over them. Ask yourself how this writer made you care about the protagonist, or feel revulsion for the antagonist, with so few words. Where is the conflict in the story? How are the characters different at the end of the novel? This is the craft that we’ll discuss in the next part of this series, and it’s what we should look for as readers.

It’s never too late to start. And it’s impossible to do too much of it. Above all, branch out. I wrote my first novel after months of reading and reviewing detective and crime fiction for a friend’s website. These were not my preferred genres, but I was reading and reviewing a book a day. I learned so much about intricate plotting, misdirection, tension, danger, and the crafting of horror. These elements now appear in my young adult novels, my science fiction, my romance. Every type of story has many elements of all other types of story. Study all the genres deeply. You may even uncover a new passion or write a completely different kind of novel.

It also helps to not be too deeply immersed in the types of stories you want to write. If you only read within your writing genre, one of two things will happen: You’ll write something derivative and unoriginal, or you’ll be so terrified of doing this that you’ll be closed off to exploring themes that your colleagues are also delving into. Both are terrible risks.

As a science fiction author, I’ve found it better to read non-fiction. Many of my story ideas come from newspaper articles and the latest works of science and philosophy. History books are a great inspiration, because they reveal the cultural patterns that forewarn the future. Satire is impossible without a deep understanding of history.

Romance novels benefit from books on psychology. A thriller featuring a tortured couple gets new layers by reading self-help books meant for those going through a divorce. Even fiction authors have to do research. Certainly read enough in your genre to understand what readers expect (even if your goal is to defy expectations). But don’t get trapped. The more adventurous you are with your reading, and the more avidly you read, the stronger your writing will become. There is no better writing advice than this. All writing advice, in fact, presupposes the truth of this: that we must be readers first and foremost.

Insight #5: This is a marathon, not a sprint.

Despite what appears to be exceptions to this rule, writing is not a get-rich-quick scheme. You don’t sit down, bang out a rough draft, and watch the money flow in. Your first novel will quite likely not be your best. When I was starting out, I gave myself ten years to see if I could make this work. Ten years! The plan was to write two novels a year, twenty novels in total, hoping that eventually one of them would be decent.

I get emails all the time from writers who have heard this advice from me and credit it for the success they eventually found. It helped them to not give up. It’s exactly what this philosophy did for me. It also allowed me to concentrate on the writing and not the promoting. Promotion is a waste of time until you have enough material out there for each one to feed on the other. It’s not like those books are going away or growing stale. Wait until you have five or six novels published before you start to spread the word. Pour every spare minute and every ounce of energy into the writing while you can.

This is one of those bits of advice you simply must trust and believe in. I was lucky to stumble upon the truth of this early on in my career. These last two insights truly distill what a writing career is all about, and the simplicity can blind us to the quality of the advice: Read and write. Just keep doing this and you will surprise yourself.

Insight #6: Whoever works the hardest will get ahead.

This insight is for those who measure their success as a writer by readership, sales, and the ability to make a full-time living from their craft. The biggest, most daunting, terrible, awful truth working against this type of success is this: There are only so many readers. It really is as simple as that. If there were twice as many books being consumed, there would be a lot more seats on the bus to successville. Ten times as much reading would be even better. You’d have ten times the chance of making it as a writer. There’s a lot we could do as a society to increase the number of readers, but that’s a blog post for a different time.

Because of the limited number of readers, and the ever-growing number of distractions and hobbies that aren’t reading, only a limited number of people can find an appreciable audience and make a living with their writing. But there’s good news as well: A larger share of the readers’ dollars are now going to writers, which means more writers today can make a living than at any time in the past. The other bit of good news is this: Not many writers are willing to do what it takes to make that living. Which opens the door for you.

I know a lot of people who make a living with their writing. Many of my close personal friends are among those who do. And this isn’t a self-selected sample, where I end up meeting other writers at writing conventions, so all my friends are successful writers. What I’ve seen happen over and over is people who want to know how to get this done, and then go out and do it. What they all have in common, bar none, is a work ethic that borders on obsession.

This is true of all careers with more dreamers than open slots. Going back to sports, imagine the number of times Lionel Messi kicked a soccer ball off a brick wall, passing back and forth to himself, while his friends played Nintendo or watched TV. Successful people find a joy in the thing they do that allows them to do more of it than their peers. I guarantee I’ve read more books than 99.9% of aspiring writers. For many years of my life, I had a goal of reading a book a day. I did this throughout college and most of high school. And when I started writing, I carried the same obsession into my craft. I joined a writing group, read writing theory and advice, and wrote two to three novels a year, plus many shorter works.

This meant getting up at four in the morning to write before work. I wrote over my lunch break. I wrote all weekend. I revised my rough drafts a dozen times. I hired, traded, and begged for editing advice. And I’m not even a good example of proper work ethic. I have friends who write, revise, edit, and publish a novel a month. Year after year. I have friends who have published over fifty novels in their first handful of years of writing. Both of my friends who publish a book a month make millions of dollars a year, and they are among the best writers I know when it comes to craft. I can’t put their books down. They pass like Messi.

When I hear writers brag about how little they publish, or how long it takes them to finish a novel, I hear Steph Curry brag about how little he shoots hoops, or how he only practices once a year. I turn on the TV to watch athletes who obsess over their craft. I admire writers who have the same level of obsession. This is what anyone who wants to make a career at writing should expect from themselves. Stop listening to anyone who brags about how little they write and how much they procrastinate. Surround yourself with the Messis and Currys of the writing world.

Please note here again that making a career at writing is very different from being a successful writer. They’re two different goals. Successful writers are out there completing works and making those works available to readers. These writers might dream of making a living one day, but unless they are outworking everyone they know, their chances are slim. A dream is not a plan. There’s nothing wrong with writing for the pure joy of creation. There’s nothing wrong with shooting hoops with friends, or playing in a community basketball league and wanting to win every game without ever being paid one dime. Know your goals, and know what it takes to achieve them.

Insight #7: Competition is complicated

It might be true that there are a limited number of readers, and that you have to outwork your peers to turn writing into a career, but that doesn’t mean we’re all in competition with each other. We’re only competing to a certain degree, and then we’re in cahoots. Believe it or not, this is a team game.

Steph Curry played for Davidson College, not far from where I grew up. I watched him play college ball. Steph was competing with every player on his team, and every player in his division, for a spot in the NBA. But once he made it to the NBA, he was now reliant on not just his teammates but on his opposition to advance his career. The better Lebron James played, the more spectators and the more money Steph Curry enjoyed. And vice versa. Every NBA superstar grows the pool of viewers, hence advertising dollars, and so all NBA pros benefit.

I see a lot of writers get this wrong, claiming it’s a zero-sum game and we’re all competing with each other. This is nonsense. None of us can write fast enough, or a wide enough variety of material, to please all readers. We rely on our fellow pros to keep interest in the hobby high. JK Rowling did so much for all writers when she increased the number of young avid readers. I rely on my colleagues to keep people reading while I’m working on the next book. Just as Steph and Lebron both work to keep ratings high, advertising dollars flowing, and salary caps increasing.

The biggest fear NBA players, team owners, and executives should have is that viewers might change the channel. The real competition at this level is the NFL, MMA, CNN, the great outdoors, and so on. The paradox is this: You compete up to a point, and then you rely on each other. This means it’s never too early to foster great relationships with fellow writers. Which leads me to the next insight…

Insight #8: Be helpful and engaged

If there’s a shortcut to writing success, it’s here. Be helpful to other writers, and you’ll find your generosity will pay dividends. It’s not the reason you should try to be helpful, but it doesn’t hurt to know that being a good person will be rewarding. I’ve seen it over and over in this industry.

One author I know was a brilliant illustrator. While still working on his first novel, he started helping indie authors with their cover art. He did much of this work for free, and then for much cheaper than he should, all because something most of us find difficult came very easily for him. His generosity and kindness made him incredibly popular. When Jason Gurley finished his novel Eleanor, there was a long line of people eager to give it a read, offer blurbs, and promote the hell out of it. Your novel still has to be good, of course. But you won’t believe how difficult it is to get even family and friends to read your work. Writing good material is a necessity, but it isn’t enough.

Another friend of mine got her start by being a beta reader for other writers and later an editor. You could learn how to format ebooks and offer this service. Or start a blog reviewing and promoting new releases (I’ve watched several bloggers move into writing; it was my path as well). You could join a few writing forums and contribute as much as you can to the helpful discourse among writers. Be yourself. Be kind. Form relationships. Share your journey. Soon you’ll meet and get to know those who want this as badly as you do. And if you’re lucky, you’ll find yourselves on opposing teams one day, realizing that you are now both colleague and competitor, but that you only go as far as you can lift each other up.

Insight #9: Know your readers

My first reader was my cousin Lisa. Other people had read my rough drafts and manuscripts before her, but Lisa was the first person who – under no obligation to read my work – sought it out, loved it, and started asking for more. She also – crucially – began telling all her friends how much she loved my debut novel and asked me if she could send copies to them. At the time, my book was just a Word document. I told her to feel free to send it to anyone. By the time I received a book deal and had the novel ready for pre-order, Lisa had dozens of friends and family excited about the release and securing their copies.

When Lisa talked about what she loved in the book, I listened. As readers began leaving Amazon reviews, I read them closely. I started a Facebook page primarily to connect with readers. I’ll never forget the day I friended my 1,000th reader and realized I was reaching well beyond friends-of-friends. Now I was connecting with strangers from all over the globe. Cultivating these relationships, and giving back every ounce of the love and passion that was streaming toward me and my works, was profoundly satisfying and paid enormous personal and professional dividends.

Connecting and getting to know your readers is critical. Set up platforms that allow this as early on as you can. The important thing is to make it easy for readers to find and connect with you. Don’t waste time trying to win over new readers by spamming social media; this does not work in a sustainable manner. Instead, spend your creative energies writing more works. And use your downtime to connect with the readers you already have. Other readers will come. It all starts with one, like my cousin Lisa.

Insight #10: Know your industry

My last insight is a peek ahead at the final part of this series, but it’s one of the things I wish more aspiring writers thought about before they began honing their craft. The writing industry is a business. Whatever your goals and aspirations, you should learn as much as you can about how books are made, distributed, sold, published, edited, translated, purchased, read, shared, and recycled. Working as a bookseller gave me an advantage that I didn’t appreciate until many years later. When I realized how little most writers knew about their industry, I was shocked at first and then later dismayed. Dismayed, because I saw how many writers were taken advantage of or disappointed simply by not knowing very much about the field they’d devoted their creative lives to.

Most students who go into medicine have at least some idea of the work that will be involved, the hours, the expected pay, the time it will take to get through their residency, the fact that they’ll be working graveyard shifts before they ever catch a whiff of their own practice. Before they take on several hundred thousand dollars in student loans, they look into what an anesthesiologist might expect to make in the state of Indiana upon graduation.

Very few aspiring authors know how much they’ll earn from every paperback sale. Or that most works of fiction are now purchased as ebooks. Or that most physical books are now purchased online. If the goal is to sell enough books to raise a family, the dream should be to have a great online presence for one’s books, and to concentrate on ebooks. However, if the goal is to place books into bookstores and submit for awards in particular genres, the plan should be very different. Understanding these choices and managing expectations will be the subject of the fourth part of this series. For now, my advice is to start learning as much as possible. Read Publishers Weekly, The Passive Voice, Kristine Rusch, JA Konrath. Spend time in bookstores. Follow authors who blog about their experiences. Know what you’re getting yourself into.

Those are the top ten things I wish I’d known before I got started. Next up, I discuss what I wish I’d known about finishing my first rough draft. Maybe it’ll help you, however far along your own writing path you happen to find yourself.

Bonus Insight:

Many of the challenges and frustrations you’ll encounter along the way are the exact same as those felt by every other writer. The exact same. Writing requires long stretches of uninterrupted concentration. This sort of time has always been difficult to carve out. We have children, pets, and spouses who require our attention. We have day jobs to work around. We have the stress of bills, mortgages, student loans, rent, empty gas tanks, empty stomachs. We berate ourselves for not writing more. We judge ourselves when our works don’t sell. We watch as other writers get ahead, as markets change, as retailers come and go.

Every generation of writer thinks that their challenges are unique, and that every other cohort of writer had it easier in the past or will have it easier in the future. That’s because the past highlights those who succeeded there, and their success seems to have come all at once, without the failures, frustrations, and challenges that all writers feel in the moment. The present for a struggling writer is certainly suffering, but this never stops being true. It’s always been true.

The only thing that truly changes over time is the stories and rationalizations that we tell ourselves when we feel these universal pangs of self-doubt, envy, and exhaustion. We tell ourselves it’s because Barnes and Noble is killing indie bookstores. Or that it’s Amazon destroying B&N. Or that it’s Amazon introducing a new program. Or the Nook not doing enough to compete. Or James Patterson and his stable of co-authors. And so on and so on and so on.

The excuses and the stories we make up vary. The challenges don’t.

The fact is that the writing landscape today is as vibrant and viable as it’s ever been in the history of mankind. Authors have more power and control over their careers than ever before. They have more access to readers, to each other, to foreign markets, to the tools of publication, and to the infinite manufacture of goods at almost zero cost. Ten years ago, it was almost impossible to reach readers. Ten years from now is a complete unknown. Seize the day, my friends.

#writing #writing advice #amwriting #books #books and literature

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perryavenue · 6 months

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rainjoy Has A New Post. It's Personal

rainjoy is one of my favorite Klaine fanfic authors. Their first Klaine fanfic was published on LiveJournal in 2011, their last in 2021. Health issues have become more intense over time. Their most famous works, All The Other Ghosts and Grey, were published in 2012 and 2013. So those who've joined the fandom fairly recently may not even know about their other fics, the most recent one being from 2021. rainjoy has written Klaine in every genre: high school!Klaine, college!Klaine, married!Klaine, supernatural!Klaine, fantasy!Klaine, and even superhero!Klaine.

Here is a link to rainjoy's works on Live Journal

Here's a link for Dreamwidth

I hope that you'll help boost it by re-blogging. Thanks in advance, @klaineccfanficlibrary and @todaydreambelieversfic

This is rainjoy's post from today (October 27, 2023).

"Hello, I’m still alive.

Hello, I do mean it, hello anybody around to see this, I really hope you’ve been well, I’m sorry I haven’t been around, I *haven’t* been well. But I have, over a course of fucking months, actually written something, so I’m writing *this* here so I don’t need to leave a novel-length author’s note on it, as some kind of explanation of where I’ve been.

Largely, I’ve been in bed, I’m likely going there again after posting this, they need to invent new words for how tired I am so much of the time, my upgraded wheelchair is worth about as much as my *laptop*, my life revolves around Can I? Probably not. and lots and lots and lots of ‘resting’. I’ve not been well, but please don’t worry, I’ve not been unhappy. This is the golden age of being ill, the sheer quantity of stuff out there to amuse the bedbound – I have books and podcasts, all of Netflix, I practically live on Sky: Children of the Light, when I’m too dopey even for that I have Animal Crossing, when I am genuinely such a puddle of not-human lethargy that all I need is for time to pass until I feel just slightly better again I have videos of other people playing video games on YouTube and I’m sorry my darling baby moths I will pick you up and help you every single time but it will never not be funny watching someone go through Eden for the first time on YouTube, it just never will not make me laugh, oh my gods I’m so *sorry* my loves <3

So anyway, there’s all that, that’s where I’ve been, life really does not work out the way you planned it to, huh? Because outside of my bed, I know I have messages and emails and someone got a tattoo?? You got a tattoo and I’m just really sorry I haven’t been in touch, my energy has to be paid out like a miser, if I want to wash my hair then wow the world is really not getting anything else out of me, you know? But I am still here, and I do still love the things I love. I still think all of it is worth it. I think the world is a *lot* of fun, though I bear in mind that still, and always, we live through very frightening and distressing times. Which actually makes me think we need to cling to the things we love *more*, not less, love makes better people of us, when we let it.

So I did watch the new season of Good Omens when it came out, and safe to say I was not impressed, but it did jog in me the memory that didn’t I write a sequel to it? Yes I did, and it involved *all* that blood. But I reread it – it’s like reading a stranger’s writing after so long – and that jogged the memory: Didn’t you start a sequel to *this*?

Yes I did! Two thirds written, actually, hurrah for my past self. The last third took, I don’t know, when did the new season come out, it took that long. I used to sneeze out this sort of thing. This, now, is getting at my arms, it’ll be another lie down soon. But anyway, the point of all this: I live yet. In the next few days I *hope* I will be formatting and posting a sequel to But Thou Readst Black because of course everyone wants *that* back in their heads again, my gods. And I hope hope hope you’ve been well, I do think of people while I’m stuck doing nothing but pooling my brain out of my ears on YouTube. Look after yourselves, take care of each other, my gods you tattooed yourself I mean more power to you but it alarms me when things I make turn out to be *permanent*, you know? It feels like I barely touch the world anymore, my circumference has become so small, but it makes the world seem only more precious. Take good care of it, and of yourself as part of it. And very, very much love, to anyone remaining to see this, much love <3"

#rainjoy #klaine fanfic #rainjoys writing

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trollprincess · 1 year

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So my hometown is building a community center, and some people are livid there’s going to be an LGBTQ+ presence. Since I’m not sure I trust my hometown newspaper to publish the letter to the editor I just wrote, I’m going to post it here with some names and whatnot redacted.

Dear Editor,

I am writing this letter in regards to the proposed community center, and the response which appeared in your newspaper.

My name is Jennifer. Many of you know me well. You went to school with me, you’ve worked with me, you know my parents or my brother. You know me as the bookworm who learned to cross the street just to get to the library, the bundled-up woman walking her barky beagle mix down Main Street, the friendly girl with the colorful hair who tries to smile at everyone she meets.

I grew up here. I remember buying penny candy and comic books in a store which burned down years ago, picking up groceries for my grandmother in another store which is now just a public eyesore, and writing my self-published novel in a cafe which changes hands only to fail every oher year. I have spent the vast majority of my life living in [this town].

I’m also bisexual.

The proper term may be more like pansexual. As described by a character on a certain sitcom, “I like the wine and not the label.” It’s the person I love, not the body parts. And in part, that might make me demisexual as well, meaning that I am only attracted to people after I get to know them well.

That last paragraph might be confusing to some of you. It’s not hard. I don’t like everybody, but I keep my options open. Better?

I questioned for years whether or not I was bisexual or pansexual or straight, but I was never - not once in my entire life - afraid that if I told my parents I was not straight they would hate me or reject me. I’ve got great parents. My mom and dad love me more than any words I could summon up can describe. And what’s upsetting for me right now is how many people in this town I thought felt the same about me, or about their own children, don’t.

I don’t remember when the people here became so cruel. Am I just seeing the past through rose-colored glasses? Probably. I don’t think I remember anyone here being so cruel and filled with hate, and then I recall my high school years in the 90s, when “gay” was the worst slur you could call someone. I don’t want to think that people I’ve known since I was in kindergarten have been bigoted all this time, but then a memory will slip through of some racist comment or grumbled slur someone I thought was a nice person I could trust said.

Now, sometimes, I’m afraid in my own hometown.

I shouldn’t have to be. No one should have to be. Hence, the community center.

Putting aside the LGBTQ+ community, this town needs somewhere where kids and teens can go. I grew up here and every time we came close to having somewhere to go, it would be snatched away in a heartbeat, only for the adults to wonder why teens were out kicking out the slats in the gazebo or burning the playground equipment. Go outside and play! Just don’t hang out here, or there, and definitely not downtown, and nowhere around people. And God forbid, not in groups.

A community center is something this town has desperately needed for decades. Decades. A place where we can go in the rain, where kids can go to hang out safely with our friends, and where we can learn about each other’s differences.

I’m sick of the cruelty I’ve seen in this town - from older folks, from people with inflammatory bumper stickers on their car, even from members of the town council. I’m sick of that cruelty not being called out by others around them because those people “grew up in a different time” or “are my friends, I can’t tell them not to say that.” I’m sick of living in fear of the cruelty of my own neighbors. I’m sure I’m not the only one.

Why is it important that LGBTQ+ people be included in the community center? For the same reason non-Christians should be included, and people of color, and others who are different. Because some of you are so ill-informed you think gay people are recruiting (we’re really not, although we appreciate you think we can agree on a grocery list, much less an agenda), that we’re grooming children to molest them (oh, if anything cut down the possibility kids in this town would get molested, it was tearing down most of the churches), and that transgender people are going to go around forcing people to be a different gender and cutting off people’s genitals (please stop thinking about other people’s genitals, it’s rude and gross).

Talk to us. Listen to us. We’re actually pretty nice. And not just us, but other people who have different life experiences than you. That’s the whole point of a community center - to learn, and to grow, and to become a better person by correcting the harmful beliefs you carry with you.

I’m going to close my letter with a quote from Waymond Wang, a character from “Everything Everywhere All At Once.” He said, "The only thing I do know is that we have to be kind. Please, be kind. Especially when we don't know what's going on.”

Thank you.

[Yours truly, fuckos.]

#lgbtqia #lgbtqia+

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smackthedevilwrites · 4 months

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As the year comes to a close, almost, I just wanted to take some time out to say thank you to everyone who reblogged, bookmarked, shared, liked, read, left kudos and comments on my fics. I’m very lucky to have found myself as a writer within a community of really nice, genuine people from all over the world.

I love writing. I really should be spending time on my novel, which is unrelated to J2 but here I am, publishing a fic a month about these two yahoos who have really gotten under my skin. What can I say, I love them. There is just something unending about J2, no matter what other people say or do, J2 are eternal. As ships go, the aesthetics are heavenly and the chemistry of an almost 20 year friendship are the gifts that keep on giving. And with that, my brain will not stop until every trope, every occupation, every situation has been explored with J2 at the helm.

This year, Jared has been a lighthouse keeper, a multi-media management employee, a ghost, a Christmas tree-topper, a vampire, a hooker and a porn star in training amongst other things. Jensen has been a vampire too, a Greek soldier, a book-store owner, an ice seller from the 1920’s and a virtual reality coder. I keep them busy, is all I can say.

There is just something magical about creating worlds centered around the two most beautiful men on earth. I have a new fic lined up for the new year but I am going be (reluctantly) taking a break which is good because Christmas is fun but bad because I write literally every day of my life. I’m sure I’ll survive it.

I wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year!

Here below is the complete list of every J2 fic of 2023 – 666,130 words – make of that word count what you will. 😦

Very long list under the cut -

THE LOVE LOCKER

Jensen Ackles buys storage units for a living, it's a lucrative business which has made him a comfortable amount of money. One thing he learned on the job is that one man's junk is another man's treasure. People leave all manner of things in abandoned lockers; money, comics, designer clothes, sports equipment, antiques, books and sometimes (maybe just the once), people.

THE PURPLE IRIS

In 1926 Louisiana, twenty year old Jared Padalecki has been forever searching for something to fulfil him. The youngest of four sons born into a rich and privileged family, Jared is ignored by his mother, father and brothers who think him wild and believe him to be of no use to them. In a desperate bid to inject excitement into his life, Jared spends his formative years seeking thrills but finds nothing that suits his character, until he comes of age. Jared is a late bloomer, lonely and questioning his sexuality. Through self-discovery, Jared opens himself up to the world in the most intimate way possible, attracting the attention of the mysterious 'iceman' and a rich older friend of his father's who takes advantage of Jared's vulnerability and loneliness.

FOREVER SEVENTEEN

Jared Padalecki was well-traveled for a sixteen year old and had lived in many different countries around the world. His passion was history and joining his parents on archaeological digs, standing on the sidelines and watching as the past was slowly revealed. When Mr. and Mrs. Padalecki decided to take on regular jobs and settle down in Santa Cruz, it gave Jared his first taste of high school in the US. With only two weeks until summer break, he had little time to settle in and even less time to make friends to keep him busy during the summer. However, on his very first day, Jared was taken under the wing of the very mysterious but shockingly handsome Jensen Ackles. At seventeen, Jensen had a worldy air about him and an intelligence to match Jared's. Soon, they became insperable and during that crazy hot summer, they became eternal together too.

GLOW IN THE DARK STARS

Have you ever met a terrible person and wondered why they did the things they did? What happened to them that turned them into a bad person? Were they born like it? What kind of trauma led them to become such an a-hole? None of those questions are answered here. Instead, what you will find is what happens to terrible people when they realize that they’re terrible. Jared Padalecki is young, not particularly dumb (actually pretty smart, eventually) and definitely full of come. He’s also full of himself too. When his car-crash of a mother announces her marriage to Jensen Ackles (lol), Jared actually couldn’t care less but Jensen is harboring a secret. Mmm, I wonder what it could be?

BERRY PIE

1969 - the summer of love for young people all over the world, the moon landings and the last year of the swinging sixties. In Jared Padalecki's small world, none of that figured as he battles to make sense of himself and a girl called 'Juliet' in an unloving home. The Padalecki farmstead had always given the impression of a happy home; it was beautiful, the heart of the community and the family were well-respected. Jared had always felt a little different to what was expected of him and most of the time, his life and future felt hopeless and carved out for him. But there was something about him that said determination as he quietly and privately tried to bring 'Juliet' to life, the other part of him, the girl he so very often needed to be.

EROTAS

When Jensen was fifteen, he was selected by the Gods and the elders of the Sacred Army temple in Thebes to one day fight alongside a same sex lover as part of the three-hundred strong company of the most beautiful men in all of Ancient Greece. His looks, strength and sexuality was noticed by Zeus but the Theban council elders were hesitant to enlist him, worried that his peasant upbringing would not be the right fit for the army. At twenty-two, Jensen finally left his modest home to join the army, four years later than he should have. His beauty was much admired by his superiors who urged him to form a union of love and strength with the rich and equally beautiful Jared, who was plagued by prejudices of status encouraged by his biased mother. Jensen was loathe to chase after a man who did not want him despite Jared’s obvious beauty and soon Jensen’s eyes were eventually drawn elsewhere; love came swiftly to him in the arms another, leaving Jared seething with jealousy and the council left with no other choice but to take the matter into their own hands.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE

Jared Padalecki is the most popular of all the boys at The Cactus Club, an all-male brothel in the state of Nevada. He’s good at his job because he needs the money and has big plans for his future, just like all the other young men in the club. At twenty-two, Jared is a veteran of sorts, the ‘mother hen’ of the brothel. Independent and quite strong-willed, Jared’s life is turned upside down after a tragedy rocks The Cactus Club but he soon learns that there is a much nicer world outside of Jared’s sex oriented existence and Detective Jensen Ackles is the reluctant cop who teaches him the ways of kinder way of life.

PRET A AIMER (READY TO LOVE)

Jensen Ackles is the most powerful man in the fashion industry, editor-in-chief of ‘Sync’ magazine and an all round uncompromising hard-ass. In the weeks leading up to Christmas, Jensen notices a leggy young man propping up the ‘Power House’ building where the ‘Sync’ headquarters are housed. Eventually, curiosity gets the better of him and after finding himself displeased with the models whom had been sent his way, he sends his assistant to drag the young man off the streets, a young man who turns Jensen’s world and the world of fashion upside down.

THIRTY YEARS IN AUGUST

After finding himself alone in a city he had always hated, amateur photographer and almost college student, Jared Padalecki takes himself off to Coney Island for the day in search of much needed adventure which he finds in the shape of one of America’s finest.

MIAMI & YOU

Miami based Jensen Ackles is a veteran porn star with a new venture on his mind and no plans to quit his career. After finding the perfect young man for his dubious project with the help of his manager Matt, Jensen’s unprepared body and mind are sent into turmoil.

WHOA, WE’RE GOING TO IBIZA

Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles had been together for four years but life decided to throw one pile of crap after another at them which led to a sad and bitter break-up. A few months previously, Jared had booked a vacation for himself, Jensen and eight of their best friends to Ibiza. Not wanting to let the side down, Jared and Jensen agreed to allow the trip to continue despite their messy relationship. It turned out to be just as awkward as everyone had expected and fraught with drama none of the friends saw coming.

A TOWN CALLED KISMET

It was 1994 and Jensen Ackles was doing his best impersonation of someone who didn’t constantly have thoughts about other men on the brain. It had never sat right with him, being gay. He had never said it out loud, even to himself and then spent the rest of his time, burying it all under a false life which he hated with a passion. At thirty-two Jensen was seen by the people of Kismet, Iowa as successful. He had a good job, his own home, his own car and kept himself in favor within the community by lying about being a good little Christian too. His ‘friends’ and neighbors had taken to the version of Jensen he had created to hide himself away from the world and for seven long years, he had just about managed to keep it all neatly tucked away. But then, life has a funny way of throwing boys off buses in the middle of ‘Bumfuck Nowhere’ and into the path of closeted gay men.

THE BOYS WHO USED TO BE US

Jensen Ackles had moved on and so had his very private high school crush, Jared Padalecki. Jensen hadn’t gone quite as far as the star student he quietly wanted and for years, Jensen had always wondered what had become of the boy he once adored. We all leave echoes behind us wherever we go; discarded family and friends, legacies of achievements and memories left behind in the minds of everyone important who peopled our youth.

Jared Padalecki may have gone but for Jensen, there was something of a whisper of that boy wherever he went, a blanket of memories wrapped around him for all of his adult life. Little did he know, that soon, he would be making new memories with the boy who finally came home.

GOOD MORNING LOVELY

Jared Padalecki is a writer of ‘smut’. He gets paid for it but it’s not all that fulfilling. After being given a new project from his demanding publisher, Jared decides to go and research what it was really like, living in a small picture perfect town during Fall. He soon finds out that it’s much more meta than he was expecting.

IT’S ONLY A PAPER MOON

Jensen Ackles doesn’t believe in ghosts but then who does in the real world? When he returns home after a disastrous night out dressed as the ‘Leather Man’ from The Village People, Jensen discovers that he’s not alone in his apartment and hasn’t been, for a very long time.

PUMPKIN WARS

Jensen and Jared are newbies in a neighborhood they had no business being a part of but after a Hallowe’en themed run-in with the bossy leader of the Home Owners Association, they soon bring the community together by scaring everyone’s kids shitless.

THE LIGHTHOUSE

Jared Padalecki had shifted his life from city chaos to small town comfort because even at twenty-six he decided he needed a quiet life. Rockfort, Maine was precisely what he needed. The place came with views, beauty, endless seas, an unlikely friend and the peace and quiet Jared had been craving for a long time. The towns most prominent feature, the old but majestic 1800’s lighthouse which had been guiding and keeping people safe for almost two centuries became one of Jared’s many places of work and his favourite thing about Rockfort and he didn’t realize at the time, just how significant the lighthouse would become in shaping his future.

JARED WITH A HEART

Jensen Ackles had never been a lover of social media. He just couldn’t see the appeal of posting every detail about his life online for a bunch of strangers to see. Didn’t care what that bunch of strangers were doing either. Jensen lived in the real world and he liked it there. However, during his nephews birthday party, Jensen found himself in possession of his sisters phone, a self-proclaimed social media addict herself. Leanne had only meant to show him something but that small gesture led to Jensen finding love exactly how he always hoped he would.

VIRTUAL INSANITY

The year is 2073 and Cherry Computers have taken over that other fruit-based tech giant. A largely ethical company, Cherry know how to look after the employees who work in ‘Earth X’, the world’s first virtual reality world. The perks are great and endless and working inside a beta VR means that employees can be whoever they want and create their own worlds. However, living in a fantasy-land can lose its shine when human beings forget to live in the real world.

ANGEL FACE

Jared Padalecki had a problem but it only appeared to a problem for everyone else. Jared was a professional sugar baby and cam boy and he embraced it. After breaking up with his long-term sugar daddy, Jared is ‘head-hunted’ and offered a dubious job by a mysterious yet gorgeous man who had been watching him from the shadows.

NUTS ABOUT YOU

The town of Chestnut Hollow famously held a Christmas Carol Contest every year to coincide with their wholesome Christmas Market. Bookstore owner, Jensen Ackles who loved his hometown to pieces wasn’t always that enthralled by the influx of visitors to the sleepy, picturesque town he called home but after a frosty encounter with enthusiastic choir conductor, Jared Padalecki, Jensen is forced to find himself thoroughly and festively enthralled!

THE BOX OF DELIGHTS

Recently single and not by choice, Jensen Ackles also found himself stranded alone in New York after a bitter break-up. Being alone and away from family was the worst at any time of the year but the holiday season hit harder. After a talk with his mother, Jensen is encouraged to inject a little Christmas spirit into his life and so finds himself one Sunday morning at a flea market with Christmas decorations on his mind. Everything is old and tatty but an intriguing box takes his fancy which turns out to contain more ‘delights’ than he could have ever dreamed of.

HOT SANTA

Jared Padalecki was used to having everything fall into his lap. But he had never been lazy and had proved that by excelling at the life he had been handed. No one was ever truly one hundred percent happy though, even the privileged. Money could solve a lot of problems but not all of them. With only his therapist and endless hook-ups aware of his secret, Jared lived his life around his family firmly in the closet and money really couldn’t fix that problem. At the annual Padalecki Christmas party, Jared had always been in charge of supplying the visiting Santa Claus to keep his nieces and nephews happy and festive. With work being crazy that year, Jared forgot and found himself on page two of Google, desperately trying to find a last-minute Santa. As luck would have it, he found one and he wasn’t ideal, at least not as far as the kids were concerned.

LET’S FALL IN LOVE AND DO NOTHING

Self-proclaimed ‘North America’s Laziest Man’, Jensen Ackles has just quit his latest job. At the age of thirty-six, he suddenly realizes that it’s about time he made some changes to his life. After applying for a new position suggested by a friend, Jensen gets a job working as a house boy in Aspen over the Christmas holidays. All he has to do is cook the family meals, serve at the dinner table and not, under any circumstances, diddle the boss’s son.

STRANGERS IN THE NIGHT

It was Christmas Eve and trucker Jensen Ackles had found himself at his familiar truck stop in snowy Minnesota. Not wanting to spend the holidays alone, he expects to find the boy he often paid for sex to keep him company on Christmas Day but when he arrives the boy is nowhere to be found. To console himself, Jensen sits down to eat at the truck stop diner but is interrupted in his solitude by a disarming French fry thief who winds up changing the course of both of their lives.

BATTLE OF THE BALLS

After the chaos of Hallowe’en, new ‘gaybors’ Jensen and Jared have sunk perfectly into their blossoming relationship and successfully ousted evil Wendy as their HOA ‘dictator-in-chief’, almost. With the holiday season on the horizon, Jared is determined to take their festive decorations to another insane level. During that time they clash with Wendy once again and wind up as reluctant therapists after another neighbor seeks their advice.

FROM LONDON WITH LOVE

After moving to London, England for work and on the cusp of regretting his decision, Jared Padalecki finds himself alone at Christmas in a city with no friends. With work colleagues occupied for the duration of the holiday season and his family overseas, Jared can do little else but keep himself busy by exploring the city. On a rainy evening a few days before Christmas, Jared stumbles across a market and decides to try some warm spiced to cheer (and warm) himself up. While taking in the view of the River Thames, Jared is approached by a devastatingly handsome man who has a familiar cadence to his voice and within only minutes of meeting him, offers Jared a very festive but decent proposal.

#j2 #j2 fan fiction #j2 fanfic #j2 alternative universe #j2 au #j2 fic rec #j2 fan fic #j2 au fan fiction #jared x jensen #jared padalecki #jensen ackles #smack the devil #smackthedevil

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tarysande · 9 months

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Can I ask, how does one go about becoming an editor? Like, where do you apply for jobs?? What kinda training do you do?? Are there companies that hire out editors to writers? Im just so confused about it. Ive always been interested in editing, and am considering doing it as a job

Editing is a weird career.

Really, I started as a writer. Like, when I was eleven. In jr. high and high school, I was in a writing critique group and I wrote a lot. I graduated from university with a degree in theatre, film, and creative writing. I was often the person my friends came to when they needed help with a paper (or the correct placement of a semicolon). I've been involved in fandom since I was about 17, and I was very fortunate to fall in with a group of excellent writers who were also excellent betas and editors. I learned a TON from them without realizing how much I was learning.

I started editing by accident, really. Sometimes, that's how it happens. I mostly got gigs here and there through friends or word of mouth. About ten years ago, I got more serious about it. I worked for companies that paid horribly. Then I did an editing test for a company that paid less horribly, and they hired me. After a couple of years editing countless academic papers, ESL academic papers, novels, emails, business documents, etc., I decided to branch out on my own (mostly so I could work on more fiction; I was burned out on academic papers).

I joined Editors Canada, started volunteering with them, got a lot more experience, and took a few continuing ed courses to gauge where my skills were at and to determine if I needed to upgrade my education. I decided I didn't need to do that, because I already knew the things I was being taught.

I read a lot of books on editing, writing, and craft. I familiarized myself with the Chicago Manual of Style, APA, MLA, and a couple of other style guides. I learned the differences in spelling, punctuation, and style between US, UK, and Canadian English. I went to webinars, conferences, and courses (all the major editing associations offer these, usually cheaper or free for members; they are a great way to determine what kinds of editing you actually LIKE). I learned the difference between rules and preferences, and when to apply them to a text.

I work freelance, which means I have my own business as a sole proprietor. I'm a contractor with a couple of companies who sometimes send work my way, but most of my clients are individual writers planning to either self-publish or polish their work before seeking traditional publication via the agent/tradpub route.

Freelancing has many perks but is not particularly secure. Especially if you're American and need an employer to provide health insurance, or if you're single and don't have another income to lean on when contracts are scarce. These days, most of my work comes via referrals, my website, or the listing I have in the Editors Canada directory. I follow a couple of editing-related Facebook groups; I've learned a lot there, and I've also picked up the occasional client. A couple of people have found me through LinkedIn. A couple of people have found me through here!

I've never worked in-house for a publisher--mostly because having control over how many hours I work and when I work them is my top priority. In-house is a whole different ballgame; I know a bit about it from my peers, but I don't have firsthand experience to pass on. These jobs are supposedly more secure--and they tend to be salaried, with benefits, etc.

"Editing" is a GIANT umbrella term. There are SO many types of editing out there. People tend to think of book publishing first, but that's only one avenue. There are also different kinds of editors who tackle different types of problems. I've done enough of everything to recognize that I am much happier when I'm working on big picture stuff--coaching, developmental editing, manuscript critique. Others specialize in the nitty gritty mechanical details that make proofreading or copy editing a better fit.

Right now, the bulk of my work life is actually spent ghostwriting. The client's business-materials editor posted that his client was looking for someone to help with characterization in a novel. I ended up winning that contract. He came to me with one monster book. I helped him realize it needed to be at least a trilogy, and now he has plans for a ten-book series--and I'm helping write it. But I got the job because of the work I've done on the development side of editing--and because I've spent SO MUCH TIME learning about characterization (via acting, fandom/writing fanfic, reading, etc.). So. It all feeds into the same place.

The tl;dr is that my experience has been a bizarre mix of being in the right place at the right time, ongoing professional development, and learning the value of volunteering with an association. If I were starting down this career path right now, I'd probably do an editing certificate (there are many out there, depending on country). I'd definitely join an association sooner (even as a student member) and volunteer.

Actually, the ultimate tl;dr is ... this industry IS CONFUSING. So, don't feel bad about being confused. It's actually probably about eight different kinds of job wearing a trench-coat and pretending it's something called "Editing."

#on editing #editing #on ghostwriting #publishing #on publishing

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rescue-ram · 2 years

Text

HAVE YOU READ THIS BOOK??

Saw a post about "formative gay books from your youth" which set off my third fruitless quest for a YA novel I read once when I was like 12 and has lived rent free in my head ever since. Objectively, as an adult, when I reflect on the scenes it burned into my neurons, I acknowledge it was probably not that great. But it made 12 year old me have insanely complicated feelings and it's MADDENING I can find no trace of this novel.

I've searched several times over the years, and just tonight spent an hour going through Amazon, WorldCat, Google Books, Goodreads, and like three other book search databases to no avail. My last hope is that someone on Tumblr has also read this novel and recognizes it.

If any of the below ring a bell, PLEASE let me know!

Young adult novel published prior to 2008

Set in a Houston art school. I might be having false memories that it was specifically the High School for the Performing and Visual Arts.

Centered around two boys- an extremely shy visual artist and a very confident but secretly depressed writer.

Very shy boy might've had selective mutism? Definitely had a strained relationship with his family

At the beginning of the novel, shy boy has to submit a portrait for admission to school. He initially draws a caricature of himself wearing art like armor, but his mom laughs at him and tells him he misunderstood the instructions and he was supposed to write a personal essay. Shy boy struggles with this.

There was a weirdly vivid metaphor about social anxiety being like being eaten by wolves? There was also a very vivid description of being a puppet or marionette.

There was a conflict over shy boy wanting to do cartooning but having to learn painting instead?

He was initially intimidated by confident boy, but confident boy sees his cartoons and really likes them

As they get closer confident boy opens up about feeling crushed by pressure and expectations of others, conflict with his family as well? He may have been self-harming?

They keep their friendship a secret and it's either extremely homoerotic or confident boy was explicitly gay. I do not remember clearly. It gets very intense and shy boy is conflicted and uncomfortable about the secrets he's keeping.

At the end of the book, confident boy kills himself in a way that looks like a tragic accident. He intentionally overdoses on medication that induces a heart attack, but injects into a healing injury on his arm so there's no puncture marks. He leaves a suicide note for shy boy, encouraging him to be himself and be a great artist, but to tell no one confident boy killed himself because he doesn't want his family to be upset?

Shy boy is traumatized and initially keeps the secret, but at the end of the book opens up to... Someone. One of the teachers? It ends on a bittersweet but hopeful note that now shy boy is opening up and is forming healthier relationships.

As an adult, this summary sounds rather maudlin, but I remember being really struck by the writing style as a kid, especially the imagery and descriptions. I just feel crazy that this book really affected middle school me and then seemingly disappeared into the ether. If you have any idea what I'm talking about, PLEASE let me know!

#book search #bookblr #looking for a book #readblr #help finding a book #litblr #please god someone help this has been driving me nuts for years

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terezis · 5 months

Note

thank you so much for translating solving queen ophelia's mysterious death (plus your other projects ofc, you have impeccable taste)! it was a lovely read—so rare to find a complete short story with a satisfying ending nowadays.

already missing our literal ✨ queen ✨ and i surprisingly (unfortunately?? i think i have issues HAHA) grew to be rather fond of her dynamic with david adsfgh

if you happen to have any recommendations for other manga or novels or whatever (doesn't have to be similar to this, as long as it's good lmao), i'm all ears o7

anyway, thanks for your hard work! hope you're taking care of yourself and staying warm and all of that jazz. cheers!

thank you!!! i'm glad you enjoyed :o)

and LOL no you're so real for that… i also love david. like he's the worst but he and ophelia do kinda have mad chemistry with both their masks off. u kno. i liked when ophelia was like "lol wouldn't it be funny if he woke up next to my dead body tomorrow morning. lol"

as for recommendations… you're in luck because i keep a google spreadsheet of all the otome isekai i've ever read, ranked s tier through f tier and then ordered alphabetically within those rankings <3 this is normal <3

SO OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD

holy grail of eris; what if you were possessed by the ghost of an infamous villainess and then you and that ghost teamed up to solve her murder. i think this would be most similar in tone to ophelia if that's what you're interested in! much longer story though.

the one within the villainess; a girl named emi wakes up in the body of the villainess remilia from a video game, but remilia is still trapped within and comes to love emi for her earnestness and desire to make people happy. when emi's efforts fail, remilia regains control of her body and vows revenge on everyone who hurt emi.

concubine walkthrough; a high school girl from korea gets trapped in the "body" of an npc villain, the empress, in a vr game called concubine walkthrough. SO GOOD, one of my faves in the genre

death is the only ending for the villainess (also known as villains are destined to die); another girl from korea finds herself trapped in the body of the villainess of an otome game she was playing, and now in order to avoid the bad end (death) she must make one of the love interests fall for her before the "real" protagonist arrives.

i stan the prince; a girl's fanfiction about the country's prince accidentally gets published and becomes a best-selling hit, improving the prince's reputation… so the prince and princess hire her to write a sequel in the hopes that it'll help them save his/ their family's reputation. sounds cringey but is actually so funny and charming.

surviving romance; a girl from korea wakes up in a romance novel :) but uh oh :) what's that :) the genre is not actually romance :)

fiance's observation log of a self-proclaimed villainess; much sillier but so good… otome isekai from the pov of the non-isekai'd crown prince LOL

#anyways if ur looking for something more specific or like book recs or something i can do that too just lmk. LOL #Anonymous #scanlation

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mx-lamour · 5 months

Text

~ᎶᎧᎧᎴ ᏋᏉᏋᏁᎥᏁᎶ~

Here ye shall find:

RPGs & Writing Projects

Curse of Strahd

I am deep in the muck of planning a Curse of Strahd campaign, having recently been through it as a player. So far, my concept has been mostly based on a few of the Ravenloft novels, plus the absolutely heinous 5e module (many details of which I have been attempting to rewrite), and a deep unrelenting desire to reintroduce Alek Gwilym to the world (so far working with the idea that he will be some kind of ghoul). Bookish ramblings, 5e headaches, and creative solutions are under #Lamour DMs CoS.

Also: Costuming Barovia

Jewelry | Strahd: Part 1 | Strahd: Art Addendum

Alek Gwilym

It has come to my attention that this blog has become one of the top recommended for #Alek Gwilym. When I first read I, Strahd—which was given to us ver batim as the Tome in the campaign I played—I knew in my heart that this man's death was the true crux of the Barovian tragedy. I became obsessed with solving the mystery of what else had become of him and working to bring him back, because I could conceive of no better way to break a curse which had been sealed with his demise.

I continue to strive to do Alek as much justice as possible.

He deserved better. It can and will be helped.

Strahd/Alek Fanfiction

#Stralek my beloved.

The piece de resistance of my work in this realm—my portfolio, if you will—has been the Vampentine's 2024 Collection which came about through this prompt list. It contains vignettes from several universe concepts (indexed), as well as a fully self-contained 6,693-word idea under the heading "It's all right."

Other (in-progress) works include:

Immortality - In 398 BC, after finally wiping his hands of Leo Dilisnya, Strahd discovers a painter in Vallaki who looks a lot like Alek Gwilym.

Despite Fear - Alek thwarts Strahd's deal with "Death" and the OG team go on campaign to destroy the dark entity once and for all.

Ezra Sunstar

Ezra was the character I played in Curse of Strahd. He was a self-conscious fire genasi roaming Faerûn in disguise before he and a couple of adventurers stumbled into Barovia. He knew very little about his own race or lineage, and hadn't even known his own surname until Madam Eva called him by it. He was enamored with the Vistani, accidentally fell for Ireena, and remained stalwartly determined to prove that Strahd was not a monster but a man under a curse who needed help.

Slowly working through my notes to create a cohesive narrative of Ezra's experiences, which were very therapeutic for me and ultimately went very well, all things considered.

The Tome of Ezra (Anno Viatoris)

A few campaign snippets, art, and other things can be found under #Ezra Sunstar. Currently in the midst of Descent into Avernus as an epilogue/sequel to our CoS campaign, so Ezra's not done yet!

Original/Related Works

Someday...

A retelling of Cinderella, featuring Dracula as the prince, rife with influences from Slavic folklore.

Post-Dracula, Lord Godalming funds the asylum run by his husband Dr. Seward, where they investigate the paranormal influences underlying many of their wards' issues. A young man admits his college friend, Victor Frankenstein, who raves about a creature he created from the dead.

I write personal essays and suchthelike, too: #Lamour Stories

Creative Writing Advice

In college, I studied both creative writing and technical writing, with an emphasis in editing and the publishing industry. I learned enough to know that it's a tough industry to get into commercially, but some of the tricks I've learned have nonetheless been helpful in my private life and hobbies, too.

Creative writing tips will be hosted exclusively on my ko-fi page, but I'll post previews here to let you know when a new one drops. They're over there to encourage you to "take a penny, leave a penny" as it were, but at least the first several advice articles of this nature will be entirely free to read.

About Me

Creative Process

I studied studio arts in high school, and writing in college. Self-taught costume historian. I'm gearing up for the possibility of going back to school for an MFA. I think it would be pretty cool to be a creative writing professor.

I love when people make things. I love craft and story and folklore. I think people should make things they love. I'll reblog things that resonate.

Publications

Check out Wishbone Words, a magazine made by and for disabled creatives. My original short story "Skull Cave" is part of Issue 12!

Coming Soon! - Enchanted Living magazine's Summer 2024 issue will feature another original short story, "Flowers for Hannedy".

Demographics

I'm 29, married, and was only recently diagnosed autistic. Genderqueer (they/them to creatures of authority, but my fellow plebians are invited make it up as you go). I very much enjoy thou/thee/thy/thine second-person singular pronouns.

My middle name is love, and I am an icorrigible romantic.

♡ Lamour

#intro post #constantly evolving post #lamour stories #lamour dms cos #stralek #alek gwilym #ezra sunstar #this seems relevant #lamour's asylum wip

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hbyrde36 · 8 months

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Self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 🖤

oh! so fun, thanks anon!

In no particular order because they are all precious to me:

Steve Harrington: Vampire Hunter

Vampire Eddie Munson, Vampire Hunter Steve Harrington, P.I. Robin Buckley, bad-ass gun toting Nancy Wheeler, VAMPIRE DUSTIN!, Stripper Chrissy Cunningham, and so much more.

My ‘steddie as Anita and Jean-Claude from the Anita Blake novels’ fic. I fucking love this thing. It’s SO FUN. The book series it’s pulled from start out in the 90’s (yes I’m old and I read them when they were originally published🙈) and as much as I love the idea of Vampire Hunter Steve having a beeper, I decided to bring things up to present day (along with quite a few other changes to make it my own, and to fit the steddie vibe). It’s weird and a little challenging writing a fic intermingling two different pieces of media, but I love weaving in and combing elements of each universe's lore, while still maintaining the main beats of the story. If nothing else, read this one for the dream sequences!

2. Caught in the Undertow

Post season 4, Canon Divergent – Eddie lives and Vecna has been defeated.

AKA the sad Eddie fic, or, as i used to call it in my head, 'the passively suicidal Eddie fic'. This was my first foray into the ‘giving my own issues to my blorbos’ thing, although it still seems to be in character for them, I think. Don’t worry, I spread it out between both Eddie and Steve, so they’re both a little fucked up. I loved and hated writing every word of this fic. It was so hard sometimes and I made myself cry more than once, but it was incredibly cathartic. This is the fic I go back to and read parts of more than anything else I’ve written.

3. Times Like These

Time loop, Eddie POV

TLT was my first brain worm, my first ever fanfic, and the first thing I’d written period in a very long time. I had no idea what I was doing, but I was so intrigued by the idea and there weren’t many (any?) Eddie POV time loops on ao3 at that point so it was definitely a little bit of a “fine I’ll do it myself” moment. I was just so curious how it would play out if Eddie, the new guy who knew so little about the upside down, who got thrown into the mix and died all within a single week, were to be the one stuck in a loop. What would he think was happening to him? Would he trust the party enough to tell them? What would he do or change to try and fix things? I think I’ve improved quite a bit as a writer since I finished this, just through sheer practice, but I’m still so very proud of my first baby and think about it often.

4. Life is a Game (and True Love is a Trophy)

Canon was just a crazy homebrew D&D game, sort of.

My second brain worm, this fic lived in my head for 8 months before I had written a single word of it. It all started with the idea that, 'what if all of the events from the show had just been a D&D game played by the boys in Mike’s basement?', and then I ran with it from there. It’s a work in progress and we have still have a ways to go (I’m not sure we’re even at the halfway point yet) but I love how it’s turning out. The response from readers, in comments on ao3 and tumblr, to this one has been very kind and encouraging. It makes it SO easy to work on knowing others love it as much as I do.

5. Thank God we didn’t peak in High School

Friends-with-Benefits to Lovers, Modern Au, life after high school au, no upside down

I wrote this series at the last minute for Steddie Week. Last minute, as in I didn’t even start until several days into the event. I’ve never put out so many words so fast. This fic is loosely based on my own marriage’s origin story, although our beginnings were even more dramatic than this (I felt like I had to tone it down to make it believable). This is the first project that made me realize how fun writing from prompts could be! It’s definitely not my best writing, but the story is fun and cute, a little dramatic and angsty, and as always the boys get their happy ending!

#asks #my fics <3 #steddie fanfic #self rec #stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steve x eddie #steve harrington/eddie munson #steddie #time loops and AUs and trauma - oh my!

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authoralexharvey · 1 year

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INTERVIEW WITH A WRITEBLR — @lauryn-janae

Who You Are:

Lauryn || she/her

I am a chaotic Leo with big dreams and a penchant for causing trouble. I have dreamed of becoming a published author since grade school, and I have experience as a freelance writer. I'm currently working on my first independent novel!

What You Write:

What genres do you write in? What age ranges do you write for?

Adventure, fantasy, romance, sci-fi, and thriller. Middle grade, young adult, new adult, and adult.

What genre would you write in for the rest of your life, if you could? What about that genre appeals to you?

If I could only write one genre for the rest of my life, it would be fantasy. I love to create worlds in my head and build stories around them. There's so many possibilities, from fantasy-adjacent magical realism to high fantasy.

What genre/s will you not write unless you HAVE to? What about that genre turns you off?

I am not a fan of tragedies! I'm a big crybaby, and I hate to see people suffer. It's okay if they have to go through a lot to earn their happy ending, just as long as there IS a happy ending.

Who is your target audience? Do you think anyone outside of that would get anything out of your works?

My target audience are members of the LGBTQ+ community. I hope that even if someone is not a member of the queer community, or is an ally, they will enjoy my works and understand us a bit better.

What kind of themes do you tend to focus on? What kinds of tropes? What about them appeals to you?

I like to focus on themes of self-acceptance, and am fond of flawed characters. My favorite tropes are enemies-to-lovers and found family. The tension between enemies melding into a soft romance is so exciting. As for the found family trope, I love the idea of lonely or independent characters finding a place where they belong.

What themes or tropes can you not stand? What about them turn you off?

I do not like love triangles. Most of the time, the main character will end up picking the abusive, annoying character that they have more chemistry with over the kinder, more stable love interest.

What are you currently working on? How long have you been working on it?

I'm currently working on my first novel. It's been rolling around in my head for five years, but I only started working on it in earnest last year. I'm about 75% of the way done. Please wish me luck!

Why do you write? What keeps you writing?

I write because I have so many ideas floating around that I cannot contain them.

How long have you been writing? What do you think first drew you to it?

I started writing when I was ten. I've always been a bookworm, so it just seemed natural to write.

Where do you get your inspiration from? Is that how you got your inspiration for your current project? If not, where did the inspiration come from?

I get my inspiration from other forms of media. Books, movies, video games--sometimes I'll read or see a small detail, and it will spark a whole new story inside my head.

What work of yours are you most proud of? Why?

I am most proud of my current novel. It's messy, but all of the characters came straight from my heart. They're the most realistic characters I have ever written.

Have you published anything? Do you want to?

I self-published a book once when I was about fourteen, though I wish I could erase that from my past. I do want to publish a book traditionally one day. It's my life's dream.

What part of the publishing process most appeals to you? What part least appeals to you? Why?

I'm most excited about getting ARCs. Whenever I imagine being a published author, the moment that springs to mind is holding an advanced copy of my novel. The part that least appeals to me is querying. I hate rejection, though I know it's a normal part of publishing.

What part of the writing process most appeals to you? What part is least appealing?

My favorite part of the writing process is getting those first words down. The possibilities seem endless in that moment. I don't like editing though. I like to read, but when I'm reading my own works, I become overly-critical.

Do you have a writing process? Do you have an ideal setup? Do you write in pure chaos? Talk about your process a bit.

I write random major scenes first, then go back and add intermediary scenes. My works are like patchwork quilts; I cut and paste and stitch things together until it's finished.

Your Thoughts on Writeblr:

How long have you been a writeblr? What inspired you to join the community?

I've only been on writeblr for a few days. I decided to join it to find other writers, and gain motivation to finally complete my novel.

Shout out some of your favorite writeblrs. How did you find them and what made you want to follow them?

@nightlylaments @the-only-drama-llama @thirteenducklings @mr-writes @lyralit These were some of the first blogs I found, and I just felt like they give off cool vibes.

What is your favorite part about writeblr?

I like seeing people share memes about their characters, like the Valentine's Day cards. I think it's a really creative way to interact

What do you think writeblr could improve on? How do you think we can go about doing so?

I haven't been in this community long, so I don't know much about potential problems!

How do you contribute to the writeblr community? Do you think you could be doing more?

I like to write flash fiction and give advice. I wish I could be an alpha reader for other writers, but I don't have the wherewithal.

What kinds of posts do you most like to interact with?

I like to interact the most with polls. I'm so glad they finally added them to Tumblr!

What kind of posts do you most like to make?

I like to make opinion posts. I really like to know how other writers think!

Finally, anywhere else online we may be able to find you?

On Twitter

#writeblr event #writeblr celebration #writing community #writeblr #iwaw

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phoebenpiperx · 6 months

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9 favourite most reread books

Thanks to @retrieve-the-kraken for the tag. It's hard for me to list my fave books, so instead I'm listing my most reread books. Here's the list (which is a really eclectic collection); my comments on each book are below the cut:

1. INTO THE DREAM by William Sleator

2. LORETTA MASON POTTS by Mary Chase

3. THE ALL-OF-A-KIND FAMILY series by Sydney Taylor

4. ABOUT THE B'NAI BAGELS by E.L. Konigsberg

5. GAUDY NIGHT by Dorothy L. Sayers

6. DIED ON A RAINY SUNDAY by Joan Aiken

7. LONESOME DOVE by Larry McMurtry

8. MAURICE by E.M Forster

9. All 4 DRAMA! books by Paul Ruditis

1. INTO THE DREAM by William Sleator = It involves prescient dreams, telekinesis, UFOs, and the most terrifying of all things: ferris wheels! (Yes, I've had weird nightmares about ferris wheels my whole life, which is probably why I was first attracted to this book!) I got this book in 5th or 6th grade, and I reread it every few years when I need some shivers down my spine!

2. LORETTA MASON POTTS by Mary Chase = This creepy book, once again with a smart, quiet boy as viewpoint character, involves a long-lost unremembered sister, a secret passage in a closet, a palace, and an enchanted bridge (and has great illustrations like the one on this cover.) I loved this book and reread the library's copy over and over as a kid (and finally got my own copy!)

3. THE ALL-OF-A-KIND FAMILY series by Sydney Taylor = The series is about a Jewish family of 5 girls (thus all-of-a-kind, though at the end of the first book a baby boy is born) living in NYC in the 1910s. Although my personality is probably more like Ella or Sarah, my fave was always Henny, who was rambunctious and got in lots of trouble. I loved all the details of old-time New York AND all the Jewish holidays that were celebrated.

4. ABOUT THE B'NAI BAGELS by E.L. Konigsberg = It’s a fun book about a boy studying for his Bar Mitzvah while dealing with his mom managing his Little League baseball team, but at its core it’s about the heartbreak of losing a best friend. “Great pains make great heroes, but toothaches just make lousy batting averages.”

5. GAUDY NIGHT by Dorothy L. Sayers = This is a mystery novel set in Oxford in the 1930s; it's the 3rd in a series of 4 novels involving the romance between detective Lord Peter Wimsey and author Harriet Vane (though this one is primarily from Harriet's pov). I just reread this last week, having just got back from Oxford so I wanted to read it while the city layout was still fresh in my mind.

6. DIED ON A RAINY SUNDAY by Joan Aiken is a British thriller about a young mother dealing with creepy household help and lots of chilling rain. After checking it out from my school library, I left it lying around the house and came back to find my mom reading it and unwilling to put it down! We ended up sitting side by side on our floor heater, reading the page-turning finale together, and I’ve reread it many times since.

7. LONESOME DOVE by Larry McMurtry = My mom tried to get me to watch this Western miniseries but I simply couldn’t get into it. A few years later I stumbled upon the middle of the series and got totally addicted. I got the book and ended up reading its 945 pages three times back to back...while living in London! I remember riding the tube home, sobbing as I read the final pages, and then flipping to the front and starting it again, something I’ve never done with any other book.

8. MAURICE by E.M Forster = This story about homosexual love during Edwardian times wasn’t published until after Forster’s death, and the book demonstrates the pain of having to hide one’s true self from the world. “For during the long struggle he had forgotten what Love is, and sought not happiness...but repose.”

9. All 4 DRAMA! books by Paul Ruditis = The high school narrator in this series is gay, “But don’t worry. This isn’t one of those angst-filled books where I’m struggling to come to terms with what it all means. I’ve long since accepted it. I’m gay. I’m over it.” These books are a fun, snarky take on musical theatre, with a play as the title for every chapter and lots of musical references. These are the books I read when I’m doing a show and need a reminder that there’s always chaos backstage in every theatrical production (though I've never done a quadruple-cast show where the leads keep getting taken out!) A large portion of the 4th book takes place at the Ren Faire (and the narrator spends most of his time in the stocks because he keeps using anachronistic devices like a cell phone!) Just a warning, though--the end of the 4th book sets it up for an awesome 5th book, but the series was canceled, so don't go looking for it! But there's closure for the important stuff so you're fine! 😁

And I'll tag @kaysonthejackal, @prettyinsoulpunk, and anyone else who may want to make their own list of faves, etc.

#books #most reread books

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nanowrimo · 1 year

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“My World is Going to be a Beacon for Joy and Happiness”: Interview with Daphne Ashling Purpus

NaNoWriMo is inviting our community members to become monthly donors and help nourish our creative community! This week, long-time NaNo writer and monthly donor Daphne Ashling Purpus shares her story of creativity and community care across all the areas of her magical, colorful life. Tell us about your first NaNoWriMo. What drew you to tell your story with us?

I first heard about NaNoWriMo on a blog I was following in 2011, and while I’d never written creatively before then, I really needed a new challenge. The feeling of writing my first novel was euphoric beyond belief. To think that I’m nearly ready to publish my 14th novel and already started on my 15th (15,697 words so far this Camp session) just boggles my mind!!! I really don’t have words for what this means to me personally.

How have you participated since then?

I have won NaNoWriMo every year for 11 years and counting. According to the NaNoWriMo website, I’ve now written 1,217,353 words in all sessions. I have done both Camp and NaNoWriMo events every year since April of 2012 (some of those records got lost when the site got upgraded, but I’ve never missed a Camp session). So that makes 11 NaNoWriMos and 21 Camps, for a whopping total of 32 events! I can’t believe it!

You've told me that you write your novels with a purpose in mind. Can you tell us more about the purpose of your writing and why you self-publish?

I write fantasy because I like it, and so do many of my students (I’m a volunteer tutor for students at our alternative high school). I’m LGBTQIA+, as are many of my students, so I try to write novels showing the importance of diversity, the importance of kindness and community, and the importance of all life.

I self-publish because I want total control over my stories and because, at least in the beginning, I was too inexperienced to be chosen by the traditional publishers. But after all the work I put into my stories, I wanted to see them in print for both me and my students.

You're one of the most colorful people I know—literally! What draws you to bright colors and the use of bold colors in your house (and on your cat walks)?

I'm a flaming queer, and I also can only see bright colors. I think there’s way too much beige/neutral in our world, but my world is going to be a beacon for joy and happiness, I hope. My home and my own pink hair make people smile, and that’s a very good thing.

You're a writing tutor in addition to writing. Why do you tutor kids, and what have you learned from them?

Actually, I don’t tutor writing, I’m a volunteer tutor in math—all levels from 4th grade through pre-calc. I have over the years discovered that there are many ways to learn. Many of my students have been told they are stupid and can’t do math. I work with them to discover how they learn and to prove to them that they certainly aren’t stupid.

Why do you give to NaNoWriMo?

NaNoWriMo has given so much to me, showing me that there are millions of people all around the world also telling their stories. I need NaNoWriMo, probably more than it needs me, but I give to help ensure that it will continue always. NaNoWriMo helps more stories survive, especially in these troubling times.

One of the things that's important to NaNoWriMo is how stories connect people—how a sense of belonging is built through our stories. How do you feel that writing or reading stories has given you a sense of belonging?

Just knowing that I’m not alone in my quest to tell my stories gives me a sense of connection with others.

Top row depicts Stella and Wilson. Bottom row depicts Ghost and Emmett.

You’re a lover of animals, I know. What role have your pets played in your writing?

Oh, yes, my pets through the years have definitely helped me (and also walked on keyboards, etc). And when I’ve lost a pet, I have honored them by naming a character in my next book after them. Since I write series, those pets get mentioned in many books.

Check out Daphne’s books here! As encouragement to all her fellow Wrimos, Daphne has pledged a one-time USD $5,000 matching gift for all monthly and one-time donations made during the month of April. To date, we have more than 600 Wrimos providing year-round care through their monthly gifts. Join your fellow Wrimos and start a monthly donation today!

#writing #interview #nanowrimo #monthly donor #by nano guest #Daphne Ashling Purpus #nanowrimo experience

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fran-in-the-deep · 8 months

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Okay so, I need to get this out somewhere eventually and since this has turned out to be my writing blog, I'll just leave it here.

Clickbait Title: How I defeated my inner self doubt and have now written over 430.000 words in a year | extreme edition

Actual Summary: Me whining about how writing made me miserable, then I started writing fanfic, now have a very healthy and joy-filled relationship to writing. That writing can be fun and meaningful and I wish more people got to this point, whatever they enjoy writing, because it makes me genuinely sad to see so many writers beating themselves up over something that can be so fulfilling. And I don't mean the struggles of the writing and editing process but the constant existential justification that writers seem to have to perform. It's okay to just exist for a while.

I am one of those people who have been writing all their life and their life goal was writing a novel, publishing, becoming an author and all that. Make art, make something meaningful. I wanted to study creative writing, become an editor, the whole package.

I was also a dinosaur kind and wanted to become an Archaeologist, because nobody told me that it's actually Palaeontologists who research dinosaurs. Looking back I wish I would have stuck to this so it wouldn't take me however many years to figure out I now want to go back to it, though in a different capacity.

That is because writing was a chore, it was painful, it made me incredibly miserable. Yet it was the only thing I was good at, big fish in a small pond, small schools in rural area style. But it was always this constant perfectionism, so much pressure, so much disappointment. I have more bad memories of writing than good ones when I admit the crumbs of euphoria it sometimes caused kept me going.

Like, I hated it. The constant self doubt, knowing that I would never be good enough, that I couldn't write anything meaningful, that I just couldn't stop. I didn't even enjoy the stories I wrote myself or the feedback that I got, because as long as I wasn't publish, had really made an impact, it didn't matter anyways.

So where does this lead? That exactly a year ago I said fuck it, I don't care anymore. Fuck everyone and their high art and aspirations and having meaning and perfectionism and self doubt, just leave me alone. And I stopped writing.

For a month. And then I picked up AoT again, despite all the controversies and with no expectations and I ended up getting really invested. I started writing fanfic for it because I felt like it. I wrote by myself, for myself, no pressure and somehow ended up writing literally every free minute. You know, like Terry Pratchett did. Because it was just so, so much fun. I didn't know that writing could be so much fun.

So I wrote over 430.000 words of "bad fanfic" in a year. It was supposed to be bad, and stylistically it very much is, but even then I have fun re-reading it, because for once I'm the target audience. Because it only matters to me and that's what makes it great. And while I'm low key prouf of that number, it's not about productivity here. I haven't produced anything of merit for anyone else, and due to hospital stays and my life screeching to a halt I've had an awful lot of time to write.

Since then I've stayed out of most writing related forums because they remind me too much of how miserable I was and I just want to tell everyone in there, that they're allowed to have fun. That you can write literally whatever you want and that publishing, be it traditional or self-publishing isn't the thing that gives it meaning. You don't have to be read by a million people or make an cultural impact for your work to have meaning. I've hosted writing groups when I was in the hospital with some other patients a lot of the time now, and nothing of that will ever "matter" in the grand scheme of things but it mattered that we had a good couple hours together and they have something to remind them of that. The random funny short stories I come up for my friends with matter. My own enjoyment matters.

And it's not that I don't get it, I very much do and people are different, some kinds of writing are just not for me and that's okay. But it makes me somewhat sad seeing so many people beating themselves up about something that can be so much fun because of the mental image they have of what they have to do, of having to reach some form of grandeur so their pain was worth it, to justify their existence on this world. And for some people that works, but I'm not one of them and I hate seeing people sad, so I just want to wrap everyone in a blanket and tell them that it's okay to just exist for a while. Indulge in what you made, what you can do.

After that year I'm at the point where I felt like actually sharing what I write now, because I am petty and there isn't enough Hange fluff out there that's solely focused on them, and I can write, so I'm gonna be the change I want to see and fill that niche. (To all the other Hange writers, see you and appreciate you). And if I want to write about Levi, I just do that. Because I can, because it's fun, because I'm not owing anyone a product you pay money for. I still try my best to write a decent story, but I don't despair over it.

I don't mean to shame or blame anyone who thinks differently, if you told me that a year ago I wouldn't have taken it seriously. And there have just been many life incidents that changed my general outlook on life and whatever. Being in your early twenties is an absolute mess and things get simultaneously better and worse all the time. I've been hitting rock bottom so often all the time, especially the past half year, and writing fanfic has gotten me through it. My life might be objectively bad a lot of the time, but at least I have a good relationship to writing now. I can have fun. So that means a lot to me.

#getting all deep and philosophical at 1am #maybe i start figuring out how being on tumblr works #yes it's another it's my blog and i can decide what i put on here thing #still very fascinated that i can go here and take up space with my silly little stories and stuff #and getting positive reactions from it or at least neutral #the fascination of the web

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rescue-ram · 2 months

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6, 11, 18 for the writer asks

6. First fic/pairing you wrote for? (If no pairing, describe the plot)

Kdjfjd. Don't remember the first real proper fic that I wrote, but I think the very first fic I ever posted to the Internet was like. "What if Pippin had a Yokomon." And it immediately got deleted by the mods on FF.net for being ""spam"" kfkdk.

11. Weirdest thing you’ve ever written/thought about writing/etc.?

I got pretty wild with Kinktober this year- I think the wildest thing I published was the Hawnk voodoo doll fic kfkdkd, though Trapper Jesus is probably a v close runner up in terms of deranged premises. I- and I am genuinely mortified about this kvkkfd- almost wrote a vore fantasy fic (aka character fantasizing about vore/cannibalism, not enacted.) I half-started it and then realized no- no matter how convinced I am this character could plausibly do that- I absolutely can't publish that kdkdjkf.

ACTUALLY 18. How old were you when you started writing fanfiction

Like 10 or 11 kfkck

EDIT I'M AN IDIOT AND COPIED THE WRONG QUESTION FROM THE ASK MEME BUT I SPENT TOO LONG ON THIS LVKDKXJCM

18. Favorite Fic By Another Author

I COULDN'T PICK JUST ONE Links and squeeing below the cut.

Your Cowboy Days Are Over by Sam Donne is one of those fics I read a little too young but is so good- it's exploration of memory and trauma and parental love and the trolley problem is woven in with this great sci-fi setting and a resistance story. Absolutely phenomenal. Another fic by Sam Donne- Nebraska, an Iron Man fic- is a fic I read once a year every year for over a decade and made me weep uncontrollably at multiple points every time. It's one of the most intensely psychological fics I've ever read and dealt phenomenally with depression and autism and the nature of consciousness, and it fundamentally shaped my language of grief. It also currently only exists as a print out in a fire proof bag next to my social security card. The thought of losing that fic forever genuinely makes me gnaw on things!

One other SGA shout out: A Farm in Iowa by sheafrotherdon. My best friend and I were completely obsessed with this series in high school. Sweet wholesome AU fluff, absolutely bucolic.

In adjacent Stargate fandom, cleanwhiteroom recently posted a revised version of Force Over Distance to AO3 and is working revising on my personal fave of her stories Mathematique! Incredibly compelling slow-burn of a plot with deliciously ambiguous relationships and consciousness blending that questions the nature of self and other. Extremely concept rich story.

The Heart's Obligations by schemingreader I THOUGHT was lost media but it is found!!!! Augh. The ULTIMATE transformative fic to me- so wildly AU from its source material, Harry Potter, it's practically an original novel and yet the knowledge that this ISN'T original and IS informed by outside context changes the way you read it. Really well written and well researched historical novel with lines that have stuck with me for well over a decade.

For Man from UNCLE, couldn't decide between Wonderland and Partners, both by Pat Foley. Really interesting and realistic take on the canon material and makes great use of the Cold War setting.

Force of Nature by Jenna Hilary Sinclair for Brokeback Mountain is an ABSOLUTELY TRANSCENDENT "What if Jack didn't die" fic that is so so realistic and well written and touching. Not a happily ever after fic, but also not needlessly cruel, but a very compelling story of Jack and Ennis making a real relationship work while staying closeted in rural New Mexico. Incredible characterization, good OCs, plotty and long enough to lose yourself in, incredibly influential on my writing in ways I can't even express, you WOULD NOT BELIEVE MY SQUEE when I saw she was writing a sequel after a ten year hiatus!!!!

Graduation by bat400 takes some of the dark storylines from Star Trek Enterprise and plays them out without giving them a neat resolution an episodic TV show demands. Fully explores the depths of tragedy but still pulls it back up to that Star Trek optimism at the end without undermining what came before at all. There are some annoying formatting issues in the AO3 copy from when it was imported, but the story itself still shines. A really well written story about grief, moral injury, and recovery.

Okay we've officially exhausted my "off the top of my head" all time favorites and I'm now mentally gibbering to myself about what else I should mention because clearly I have many favorites that rotate in the back of my mind the way normal people think about scenes and quotes from real books or poems jfkdn.

We will close with Sins and Virtues by Quordle, because I VIVIDLY REMEMBER the experience of reading this I think in high school. I remember pawing thorough livejournal for TrapHawk fic recs, absolutely QwQ at the dearth, and there was like. A single line in a review for another fic, "inspired by the excellent Hawkeye/Mulcahy fic Sins and Virtues by Jane Carnall" and I was SO COMPLETELY GOBSMACKED by the concept of shipping Mulcahy with anyone but especially Hawkeye, I just had to track down this fic. I eventually found her personal archive and started reading the series like "Okay... Okay... Augh. AAAAAAAUGHHHHHHH." I was seriously getting up to pace multiple times during Such as We. Something that really made the series stand out to me was how DIFFERENT it felt. It didn't follow the usual rhythm of tension and release in shippy fics, used none of the usual tropes or short hands- it felt very original, and I loved how historically grounded it was. Like I'm sure you've already read it but if anyone else reading this hasn't, highly highly recommend!!!

#thank you for the ask #and an excuse to gibber wildly about my favorite fics QwQ

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