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amberlynnmurdock · 10 months

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Blind Faith

Chapter 5: Assumption of Risk

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Chapter Summary: There are no terms and conditions when it comes to a secret affair; you only know the risks.

Warnings: 18+ content in this chapter, smut

A/N: I hope you like this chapter! I can't believe I just wrote it this afternoon, lol. I haven't written anything smutty in FOREVER so I hope this passes. Thank you all for reading this story :D

Chapter 4 here

Credit to the gif owner!

Office of Nelson & Murdock

Hell’s Kitchen

4 PM

Assumption of risk: a plaintiff's inability to recover for the tortious actions of a negligent party in scenarios where the plaintiff voluntarily accepted the risk of those actions.

Matt Murdock was normally a very focused person, despite his ability to listen, feel, and sense things that could be distractions. It was easy to tune things out and focus on one thing at hand. Today, he used his Orbit reader to study case law regarding illegal money laundering. His fingers grazed over the braille before him, and his brows were furrowed in concentration. Ever since things with Fisk ended, Nelson & Murdock was able to take on more low-key clients and squash not-so-life-threatening issues. It was nice, to have a break from all of that. It truly felt like they were doing what they were always meant to do: help people using the law.

Of course, old habits never die. Daredevil was a part of who Matt was, whether he wanted it to be or not. He didn’t want to stop his nighttime activities anyway. Despite the city’s biggest threat being behind bars, there were still people who haunted it in his shadow; who wanted to continue to infect the city with their evil actions. Drug cartels, gangs, white-collar crimes—crime didn’t stop at Wilson Fisk.

And yet, after everything he’s endured, Matt thought something like this couldn’t hurt: being with you. Taking all of you in, in his senses. Showing up on your roof like clockwork. Stealing kisses and quiet conversations together, behind the mask. Except, Matt didn’t think he’d grow so attached in such a short amount of time. He had a hand in this fight now. You struck a match and it relit the fire in his heart.

Maybe, he would reveal himself to you. He’s done it before: Claire, Karen,… Elektra. Maybe finally you wouldn’t be the one who got away.

Even studying case law, you still occupied his mind so much. He could hear the way you gasped before he kissed you in his ears. The subtle hint of marshmallows in your fragrance was intoxicating to his senses. The way he had smelt another man on you…he clenched his jaw and took a deep breath. Don’t think of that now. Your steady heartbeat he was beginning to memorize; how it sped up whenever you saw him and how it slowed down when he held you in his arms… he knew it so well, he could almost hear it now.

Wait. Literally.

And he could smell your fragrance growing stronger: that warm smell of marshmallows accompanied by your natural scent, getting closer.

And suddenly, you walked through the door of Nelson & Murdock.

Matt nearly lost his balance in his seat. His own heartbeat pounded in his ears as he gripped his desk in his office. He kept a cool exterior but listened intently to the main room. Did you know who he was? Did you figure it out somehow? Matt began rummaging for every explanation in his head, as lawyers do, and couldn’t come up with a memory of him accidentally revealing himself and what he does in the day to you.

He listened.

“Hi, how can I help you?” Karen spoke lightly as she stood from her desk, greeting you. Matt breathed slowly as he continued to listen.

“Hi, are you Ms. Page? My name is __. I’m here for my interview for the legal assistant position,” your voice, God, it was definitely you, spoke politely—a tone Matt wasn’t used to and for a moment was shocked to hear such a different side of you. If not for the circumstances, he might’ve smiled.

“Oh, yes!” Karen exclaimed in realization, “Yes, you can call me Karen. How are you? It’s so nice to meet you. Why don’t you find a seat in the conference room and I’ll see if Nelson or Murdock can join us,” Karen said. You thanked her and walked to the conference room, taking a seat in the middle of the table. Matt heard you rummage through your bag and pulled out a folder.

“Hey, Foggy? The applicant’s here. You wanna do this interview with me?” Karen asked Foggy who was furiously typing away a summation.

“Ah, can’t. I’m on a roll to pin this fraudulent employer and if I stop now, we might lose,” Foggy said. “Ask Matt. I think his task list is light today.”

No, it’s fucking not, Matt thought to himself. Matt wanted to punch himself. Of course, the applicant had to be you. He knew you were a pre-law student, but there are tons of those in the city—you just happened to be the one who applied to his firm. Matt laughed in spite of himself—fate struck once again, between you two. Why?

“Matt,” Karen peeked her head into his office sounding hurried, “you have to do this interview with me.”

“Oh, no,” Matt argued nervously, “I—you can do it yourself. I have to read up on this case law and—-“

“Case law can wait. Potential employees and the future of this firm, cannot. Please join me, I think she’ll be a good one,” Karen pleaded. Matt sighed, shaking his head. He couldn’t believe what he was getting himself into.

“Okay,” Matt replied, defeated. “But you’re leading the conversation.”

Karen scrunched her brows at him, wondering why he was acting the way he was. She shrugged it off and joined you in the conference room.

Matt prepared himself as he grabbed his cane from his desk, slowly undoing it. He cracked his neck and took a deep breath. He tapped his way to the conference room and slowly opened the door.

He was immediately hit with your qualities again, and if he hadn’t been dressed as Matt Murdock, the lawyer, he would’ve melted right there. Your marshmallow scent warmed his nose. You were in a button-down shirt and black pants. He could tell by the minor sweat that stuck to your skin—it was out hot today. He heard you tense when he walked in. Your heartbeat grew fast—interview nerves, he confirmed. He gave a small smile and sat down next to Karen uncomfortably.

Matt couldn’t blow his cover. He had to act as if he’d never met you in his life before.

Karen cleared her throat, urging Matt to speak. She held papers in her hands—probably from the folder you pulled out.

“Sorry—I’m Matthew Murdock, one of the lawyers here,” Matt held out his hand awkwardly for you to shake. When you took it, it took all his strength to not shiver at your touch. Your hands… the same ones he held at midnight, the same ones he’s felt touch his cheek, the same ones he’s pinned above your head before…

“It’s very nice to meet you, Mr. Murdock,” you answered politely, giving his hand a good shake. Your voice… the same voice he’s heard in whispers. Your mouth, speaking… the same ones he’s kissed, just last night. Focus, Murdock. “I—I didn’t know you were blind. I would have tried to get my resume and transcript translated to braille.”

Matt raised his eyebrows—not many people were forward about his disability. He appreciated your forwardness, and he was surprised at how professional you were. Not that he didn’t think you could be, but it was strange to see a different version of you. It was like meeting you all over again in an alternate universe. He supposed you’re technically seeing a different version of him, but you don't know it.

“That’s all right,” Matt replied after a moment, “that’s why I have Karen. Among other things—she’s more than an office manager, and you’ll learn that soon.”

He didn’t have to see Karen to know she was smiling.

“So, even just glancing at your transcript, it’s very impressive,” Karen stated, flipping through pages. “3.9 GPA, Honor Society—you just graduated? Congratulations!”

“Thank you,” you answered. “Yeah, you know, fresh out the cap and gown.”

“And I see you took some journalism classes, too? Did you want to do that before studying law?”

“I did. I loved journalism and I’m actually familiar with your work at the Bulletin. Your stories on Fisk and pretty much everything you’ve done,” you explained. Matt listened carefully to see if you were lying in this interview—you weren’t.

“Wow,” Karen blushed, “thank you, I appreciate that. So why did you switch to law?”

“I think journalists and lawyers can do a lot of good for people. I also think they can do a lot of damage to people. I know journalism pretty well, but I want to do extra steps and know the law and how to use that to people’s advantage,” you explained. Your heartbeat was still beating fast, but you managed to keep your voice steady.

“You’re studying for the LSAT now?” Karen asked.

“Yes,” you said, “I just began this summer.”

“What do you do in your free time?”

Matt knew you were thinking of an answer.

“I mostly spend my weekends at home,” you lied, Matt knew. He suppressed his smile. “I’m not one for going out, so if you ever need me on a weekend, I’m there.” That was half a lie and half-truth.

“We try not to, but lately we’ve been getting so many cases, we've had to come in on a Saturday. It’s not often,” Karen explained. “What was your favorite pre-law class?”

“Legal research and writing,” you answered, truthfully. “I love writing and creating arguments.” That I know, Matt thought.

“That could definitely be useful around here. Matt and Foggy are always drafting summations,” Karen said. “I don't think I have any questions. Matt, do you?”

Matt cleared his throat. He supposed he should ask one question.

“What do you value in a place of work?” He asked.

After a moment of pondering, you spoke again.

“The truth, I think,” you answered, “if an employer isn’t transparent on one thing, how can you believe anything else? I think it’s important to remember everyone’s on the same side. You’ve got to trust each other.”

Matt nodded in response. He didn’t know what to say.

“Alrighty,” Karen wrapped it up, “thank you so much for coming in. It was a pleasure to speak with you. You’ll be hearing from us very soon.”

The three of you stood up and you shook Karen’s hand, thanking her. Matt uncomfortably took a deep breath and held out his hand for your handshake. It was hard for him to not let his touch linger like he always did with you.

“Thank you again,” You said rather softly. Karen walked you out as Matt stood in the conference room alone, hands on his waist. He sighed and shook his head.

“We are definitely hiring her,” Karen came back in the room. “I think she’ll be really great here.”

“Don’t we have other applicants? We should interview them first,” Matt argued.

“Matt, that posting has been up for weeks now. She was the only one. We are going with her. Were you not impressed with her answers?”

“She lied about something,” he said, grasping at straws. He didn’t worry you’d find another law firm to work out.

Karen crossed her arms, looking at him annoyed. “What did she lie about?”

“That she doesn’t party. I heard her heartbeat,” Matt answered, knowing it was a weak argument. Karen laughed.

“What, and you didn’t party in college? C’mon Matt,” Karen punched his shoulder lightly. “Why are you so against it?”

“I’m not,” Matt chuckled nervously, “I—“

“We’re hiring her. Overruled, whatever it was you were about to say. I’ll let Foggy know and draft her offer letter.”

Before he could answer her, Karen already left him standing there.

Fate wasn’t clever, Matt thought. It was cruel.

Hell’s Kitchen

11 PM

Matt sat at the top of his roof in his black outfit, waiting for someone to scream for help. He waited for any sign of a crime taking place, any cop cars going off, anything. And all that he was met with was silence and his thoughts of you.

He could’ve argued more to not let Karen hire you. He didn’t. He could’ve said you lied about everything. He didn’t.

Just when he was about to reveal himself to you, the interview today ruined it. How could he now, after that? Hey, it’s nice to see you again. By the way, I’m your new boss. He ran every possible scenario in his head and none of them made sense to him. Would you be mad, if you found out it was him? Creeped out? He didn’t want this to affect your career goals. He heard you call your friend, Emily, immediately after the interview. You were so excited. You knew you nailed the interview, and truthfully, you did.

Would it be better to keep this a secret? He was already living a double life—now he had to live it twice as hard with you.

Nothing was going on tonight.

He ripped off his mask and began to walk back to his rooftop access when you crossed his mind. Hell, you didn’t even cross it anymore. The thought of you was always there, Matt thought.

He knew what he was getting himself into, by being two different people with you. Nothing, not even himself, could’ve stopped him from putting his mask back on and finding his way to your rooftop.

He made his decision.

Hell’s Kitchen

11:30 PM

You didn’t know if he’d come, but you always waited at your rooftop in case he did. There wasn’t a set schedule for when you and Mike would see each other, you just did. You snuck out a short while ago when you knew everyone was asleep. You shivered as you waited patiently. You were in your nightdress and an oversized cardigan. You pulled out your phone and re-read the offer of employment letter Karen had sent you hours ago. You often did this when something excited you. You couldn’t wait to start working at Nelson & Murdock.

Maybe Mike was busy tonight. Just as you were about to call it, you heard a familiar thud on your roof. You walked over and there he was, all in black, face covered, as usual. You smiled and locked your phone as you made your way to him.

You were about to greet him, but he pulled you in immediately for an embrace. He buried his head in the crook of your neck and took a deep breath.

“It’s nice to see you too,” You laughed softly, pulling back. He rested his hands at the small of your back. “Rough night?” You asked in concern. Despite all your meetings with him so far, you never really realized the fact he put his life in danger every night, and it wasn't a guarantee he’d make it to your rooftop.

“No,” he answered. “Just wanted to see you.”

Your heart melted when he said. Maybe there was hope after all, for the two of you. Maybe you were more than just his secret.

“You seem off,” you urged politely, “are you okay?”

He was silent. You furrowed your brows.

“Is it the Catholic guilt?” You smirked, which at the very least, made him laugh a little.

“You could say that,” he said.

“I’m no priest, but if you haven’t done anything wrong, then you shouldn’t feel guilty,” you whispered. Mike tilted his head slightly as you spoke. He smiled a little.

“You make it sound easier than any priest I’ve ever heard speak on guilt,” he said.

“This isn’t confession,” you began, “but you know you can tell me anything, right? And I won’t tell.”

He nodded. “I know.”

“I mean, I haven’t told anyone about us.”

“I know.”

“And you probably haven’t either.”

“I haven’t.”

“So what’s wrong?” You urged.

Mike seemed to ignore the question.

“Tell me about your day, instead.”

“Well, I got a job today. At a law firm. I’m really excited.”

“That's good,” he whispered. “What else?”

“I had a low-key day otherwise,” you said, “just waited for tonight. For you.”

“Hmm,” he kissed you. He placed his hand on the back of your neck.

He didn’t stop kissing you.

~~~

Matt threw his thoughts of doubt away. With you in front of him, the anxieties about you disappeared. It was funny, how it worked like that. The thing that brought him the most anxiety is the thing that could calm him down. Being in your presence. It’s like, he’s more himself when he’s behind the mask, with you.

Matt continued kissing you, his kisses turning more urgent, desperate. Now that he wasn’t Matt Murdock, the lawyer… A.K.A., your new boss, could let his thoughts about you run free in his mind. It took everything in him today, at the conference table, to not melt at your touch. To not let his sinful thoughts cloud his mind. To not think of all the nights he’s been with you, kissing you in a dark alley.

Now, he could. It was just the two of you. That’s how he liked it.

You placed your hands on his chest and gripped her shirt, pulling him closer. He walked you to the side of the door of the rooftop access, pushing you against the wall. His tongue teased your bottom lip as if asking permission to enter. You obliged. Your tongues met desperately, and he kissed you harder. So hard, it was as if you’d disappear if he stopped.

You pulled back, breathlessly.

“I’m not drunk,” you told him. He kissed your jaw.

“I know,” he said.

“Last time you said you wouldn’t touch me because I was drunk,” you explained, “I’m not drunk right now.”

Matt smirked. Using his own words against him. He wasn’t going to argue.

“Silk,” he simply stated as he gripped your waist. He felt your silk nightdress under your cardigan. "I love silk.”

“I didn’t wear it for you but I guess that works in my favor,” you smiled.

“It’s soft,” he whispered, his nose grazing your cheek. “But not as soft as you.” Matt swung your left leg around him, so you stood on your right. He held you in place against the wall as you firmly wrapped your leg around his waist. He made a low sound in your ear. He could feel your heart rapidly beat in your chest. You weren’t nervous. You were aroused. And your sex, between your legs, he knew was throbbing, and wet. He could sense it in the air. He took a deep breath as he reached his fingers underneath your silk dress and ran them along your stomach.

You shuddered at his touch, as you felt his hands trace you. He teasingly grabbed the lace of your thong and pulled it so it lightly smacked you. Matt slowly worked his way up to your breasts and felt the soft curves of them. He took one of them in his hand completely as he continued to hold your leg around him.

“So soft,” he whispered, “and mine.”

“All yours,” you said with a shaky breath.

He moved his hand to squeeze the other one in a kneading motion.

“Tell me to stop,” Matt hushed.

“You won’t hear that from me,” you said.

Slowly, he reached his hand down to your wetness. He had to take a deep breath himself as he felt your wetness twitch at his touch. He felt how soft you were and fully put his palm over your sex. He took his pointer finger it moved it up your slit, onto your clit.

“Oh,” you let slip out. You rubbed yourself urgently on him. Matt held you still.

“You like that, don’t you?” He asked. He knew the answer by your soft moan in response. He pushed one finger into your tightness and listened carefully to how you reacted. Breath hitched. Her heart skipped a beat. You spread your legs even more as he kept going in an in-and-out motion, getting faster and curving with each move. He slid a second finger in you and began to rapidly thrust inside your wetness. You held your breath.

“Breathe, sweetheart,” Matt whispered.

Listening to his command, you let out a loud, salacious breath as you held onto his shoulder. Matt kissed your neck as his fingers continued to work on your wetness. He was pounding his fingers inside you, hitting your sweet spot each time. And each time he felt him hit your sweet spot, you moaned, like a chant.

“Oh, God,” you said in a weak voice. “Oh my, God. Oh, oh, oh.”

He felt your sex tighten around his fingers.

“Keep making sounds in my ear,” Matt ordered. Your moans sounded like a prayer in his ears. He closed his eyes, as his fingers swam in your wetness. He wanted you to be louder.

His thumb found your clit, and you shivered against him with a moan.

“Oh, God,” you pleaded, “Yes. Keep going, Mike—oh, my—“

“I want you to come for me, sweetheart. Let me hear you,” Matt urged you as he swiped his thumb gently over your sensitive clit.

At the final swipe, you completely shivered against his body and held onto him so tightly, Matt knew you left scratches on his back. He knew you were riding the waves of pleasure he sent you in as you kept grinding against him, even after your climax. He felt your heart beating against his chest as you collapsed into him, letting your leg fall. Matt immediately held you against him, burying his face in your neck. You finally caught your breath.

“Well,” you began, “let me return the—“

“No,” Matt contended. “Just you.”

“What?”

“That was for me, as much as it was for you,” He whispered. He caught your lips in a kiss. You melted into his touch and shook your head.

"This is bad now,” you said. Matt furrowed his brows.

“What is?”

You laughed ironically and shook your head.

“Not only are you trusting and you make me feel safe, and you’re hot,” you began, “but you’re a total fucking sweetheart.”

Matt laughed.

“No, that’s what I call you.” He kissed you and held you tighter.

“Mike?” You asked him. Matt paused. “I like this. What we have,” you said.

“I know. I do, too,” Matt answered. He tilted his head, wondering your meaning.

“And that’s still not enough for you, to take off your mask?”

He was quiet. He shook his head.

“I will. When it’s safer, and I know my enemies,” Matt explained, which wasn’t an entire lie. When Foggy and Karen found out about his secret, their lives were in danger for a few years. Evil was still out there, and he couldn’t risk you falling victim to what they went through. That part was true.

He knew you didn’t like his answer by the soft breath you huffed.

“Listen,” he spoke softly, “there are people who know who I am, and they almost got killed for it. I—I can’t let that happen to you. Please understand that,” Matt begged, placing his fingers on your jaw.

“I will,” you said, “for now. But you should know that if I know the risks, that’s on me,” you stated. “Not on you.”

“No,” Matt argued, “it is on me. That’s my weight to carry. I’m not arguing this further.”

“Okay,” you digressed.

“I have something for you,” Matt said. He reached into his pocket and found the burner phone he once gave to Claire. He placed it in your hands and wrapped your fingers around it.

“What is this, for booty calls?” You laughed.

“For when you need me,” Matt said.

“What if I always need you?” You purred as you kissed his jaw. Matt smiled.

“For when you need me when you’re in danger,” he corrected, “God forbid.”

“I’ll keep it with me all the time,” you told him. “Thank you.”

He could hear how tired you were, and if he remembered correctly, tomorrow was your first day at Nelson & Murdock.

“Go to sleep,” Matt whispered. “I’ll see you… tomorrow night.”

“Goodnight, my guardian angel,” you whispered.

“I think that’s the first time anyone’s ever called me an angel,” Matt said.

“It’s more fitting, in my opinion.”

When you went down to your room, Matt crunched at the corner of the rooftop and waited for you to crawl into bed. You put the burner phone in the drawer of your nightside table. He heard you scroll through your regular phone for a few minutes until you eventually fell asleep.

Perhaps, the risks of all this would be worth the outcome, whatever that may be.

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mobius-m-mobius · 4 months

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I know I am wildly late to this observation, but I just rewatched Thor for the first time in a very long while, and. I'd genuinely forgotten that at the start Thor is headed down a path at least as dark as Loki's? I mean Loki is making very extremely bad choices, but Thor isn't exactly less horrifying with his whole jumping straight to the 'lets "break the spirit" of an entire realm by murdering as many of them as it takes' shtick. And it's just so clearly laid out that the divergent paths they are on by the end of the first film isn't illustrative of some inherent difference in their natures or predetermined by choices they'd made before the film started. The difference is that Thor gets the opportunity to love and be loved by people outside the skewed and insulated world he grew up in, to be loved without strings attached, and discovers that the friends he had all along loved him more unconditionally, aside from his power and conquests, than he'd realized. While Loki learns that their father attaches all sorts of strings to his love, and 'learns' (somewhat truthfully with regard to Odin I think, though not with Thor or Frigga), that the love he had from them was always conditional, mitigated, based on lies and offered to a version of himself that never existed.

And I just—my point isn't 'you can't blame him for his war crimes 'cause he was sad', just that. Man it really was about love from the very beginning!!!

(P.S. I sent you an inordinately long series of messages about s1 Loki a couple weeks back, and your response was delightful, and added excellent points—just wanted to say that you; that was lovely of you, and I really appreciate how kind you always are on this blog!!)

Hey there anon, lovely to hear from you again! Thank you so much for your own kind words and taking the time to send another message! Your previous ones were a wonderful read as is this and as far as I'm concerned there's no such thing as being late to anything that isn't already scheduled, especially regarding media or fandom when there's a chance to discover someone/something new around every corner 💖💖

(Case in point how unexpected getting this captivated by a Marvel series was for me, which I only bring up because, well... quick disclaimer, I have an understanding of everything that happened in phase 1 but haven't exactly seen any of the Thor movies or until a few weeks into the airing of Loki had any real exposure to anything Marvel/Loki related between the original Avengers movie and then, which ironically I love because the moment S1 kicks off Loki's journey is where my perspective starts as well!)

As Loki mentioned many times previously, Thor truly wasn't ready to rule back then (not that Loki was either, lol) and you're not only exactly right about them both going down dark paths but I see Thor's view as worse considering he grew up surrounded by a level of confidence in companionship Loki never knew. The attack on Jotunheim pretty much says it all when Thor didn't hesitate to use hurt pride as an excuse to kill as many Frost Giants as possible, then after getting an entire war kicked off all Thor's friends were actually angrier with Loki for letting news of their visit get back to Odin despite the fact that they would've all been killed otherwise 🙃

Odin not being the best father to either of them is an understatement but there are unspoken conditions to his interactions with and love for Loki specifically due to his birth that (by nature of what an imposing figure Odin is) would almost subliminally impact everyone within range so I can't even imagine growing up in the midst of that and having no idea of the real cause, though I don't doubt Frigga's love for him or that the Thor of now wants them to be equals. It really does all come back to love from beginning to end, and makes it all the more important that Loki finally found that love and acceptance beyond his wildest dreams in Mobius so here we are now just waiting for them to find their way back to each other :')

#yes i'm aware of the universe audibly laughing at me as i devote my life to a marvel property lol #all bc of silver dilf owen wilson. the mcu knew mine and loki's weakness was a time bureaucrat with a heart of gold before we did 😔🙏#and ty again for the ask!! i might not know quite as much about things outside the loki series but love learning about them in comparison #just previously had little mcu interest and now very limited free time that only goes towards watching owen related media 😂#but i completely agree with all the points you made and have interestingly noticed they're ones not often acknowledged in the fandom #also always appreciate so much when anyone thinks of me when something about the show or anything else is on their mind!!#sending lots of love your way towards an amazing weekend! 💕#ask

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