#the x-men were far more comfortable with the idea of killing her than the avengers were | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

widow-maximov · 3 years

Text

It’s You

Pairing: Wanda x Fem Reader

Warning: Language, some fluff and angst, sexual suggestion.

Summary: Y/n thinks she has met the one until she joins the Avengers..

Word Count: 6.8K

Part 1, Part 2

Before being an Avenger, you were practically nothing but some part time vigilante whilst working full time to earn enough that would last you a whole week, you saved a few people from robbers and muggings which made you feel a little bit better about yourself, I mean not that you ever doubted yourself but knowing that you could help others whilst never having that protection during your youth times was rewarding in a way.

That’s how you have met your girlfriend, you saved her from couple of guys trying to rob her when she was working, it was also the time you discovered you had powers, you are able to control peoples minds and rewind time just enough to avoid any injuries.

It feels like it happened yesterday, you went to buy yourself a coffee from a new café that just opened up recently when suddenly there was a gun shot and a lot of screams along with some shouting telling people to get on the ground, you did that and watched the whole event unfold before your eyes.

At first it was them waving their weapons to scare people around them and demand money but as soon as they got what they wanted, they planned to at least kill someone and that was the girl behind the counter, who was scared shitless, she tried not to show it but when he pointed his gun at her and had the most disturbing smirk across his face, how could she not be, he pulled the trigger and you jumped out reaching out to the girl when everything stopped and time went back that’s when you ended up in the same place couple minutes before the men arrive.

You looked around to see if you were dreaming but before you could practically be amazed at your new ability, you jumped into action, running to the front door as the girl behind the counter looked at you funny, trying to stop you but you didn’t listen. You held the door and told her to call the police, you saw those men standing outside looking at you as they pointed a gun at you, you knew they would shoot so you ducked but held the door like your life depended on it.

For your luck the girl called the police and just when you were about to let go of the door and have them shoot you right there and then, the police surrounded all of the men with guns in their hands and with a huge sigh you let go of the door and fell back onto the floor to rest.

They were arrested and after giving your statement to the police, of course you had to lie mostly about how you knew it was going to happen, you said you had a bad feeling and figured something would happen, they were just happy they didn’t have any runners to extend their time on a case that would end up being forgotten.

The girl approached you with a small smile across her face “Hey.. I just wanted to thank you for doing that.. You saved not only me but a lot of people inside too.”

You smiled at her “It’s really not a problem, I’m just glad no one was hurt”

You reached your hand towards her “I’m Y/n” she shook your hand and replied “Olivia”

And that’s how it all started, you came by the café more often just to see her and she was happy to see you either way, she knew your order by heart and always had it ready for you. She liked your company so you stayed until you finished your coffee and was on your way, you gathered the courage and finally asked her out which she eagerly agree to. The first date wasn’t fancy but it was perfect, it was short which wasn’t a big deal and following that you had a few more dates before starting dating, eventually couple years in things started to be more than good, that’s when you decided you wanted to move in with her.

It was all perfect, you felt like nothing could go wrong but that was until you was caught trying to do your part time vigilante work by Iron Man, he dragged you to the Avenger tower to Nick Fury and he offered you a place within the team as he saw potential within you. You was taken back but agreed to join, you rushed back home as you weren’t needed until the team was back since they went off on a mission, and waited for your girlfriend to get back from work, she was an assistant for some big company so she was mostly busy but she always loved listening to your day to take the stress off her mind.

Even though you wanted to tell her everything, she didn’t know you was the vigilante, she knew you helped people out with your powers but you knew her opinion on hero'svigilantes, she hated it but was grateful for them as she felt safer within the city. You knew her intentions were pure but you had a different opinion.

You waited anxiously for her on the couch, bouncing your leg up and down from the nerves, you know her reaction will be something you wont like but this is huge for you. You will finally be able to help without hiding behind the whole vigilante ‘Time Breaker’ nickname the public made for you.

As soon as she walked in, she noticed your anxiousness “What’s wrong” She looked worried but you jumped up with a smile.

“I have news” Joy was practically dripping from you.

“I’m going to be on the team with the Avengers” You exclaimed with so much joy in your tone that you thought this somehow will make her be happy for you.

She dropped her bags and her face wasn’t like yours but with shock “What?”

“Well I helped someone out and Tony Stark caught me and dragged me to the Avenger tower and then I was offered a place in the team and I just took it”

“What?” She repeated herself as if you wasn’t talking in a language she would understand.

You looked at her confused and she finally spoke up from her shock state “You didn’t even think about considering this? You just took it without even consulting with me?”

You wanted to look confuse at her but you knew this would be her reaction “Olivia, come on you know how huge this will be-”

She interrupted you “You should’ve spoke to me about it as well.. We are a couple after all”

She took her bag and walked off towards your room as she closed the door behind her, usually when you have arguments you try to just listen each other out but when she shut the door you knew she didn’t want to listen to you so you just took your keys and walked out to give her some time to think about it and you made your way towards the tower again to meet the whole team.

The whole team was actually very welcoming when they heard about you joining, they all said that they have been watching you do your vigilante work and they were all pretty impressed. They gave me a room which you said you wont need but apparently its for long missions where you would have to be here for.

Everyone was excited to have a new member on their team and they all tried to show off their skills and abilities except this one redhead. You spoke with everyone and they all were chatting amongst each other so you took the opportunity to walk up to the redhead that was not far from yous.

She was sat at the bar, just paying attention to her drink, not really expecting anyone to approach her “Hello” you spoke up which made her jump a little.

She faced you and looked at the group of people who were just having usual banter “Shouldn’t you be over there with them?”

You leaned on the bar as you observed her “Probably but they are too busy with each other to even notice I am here”

She had a small smile across her lips as she traced the edge of the glass with her finger “Why are you here?”

“Well you are the only one who didn’t show what you can do”

She laughed “If I did that, I’m pretty sure the whole room would be upside down”

Something about this girl made you want to stick around, she was interesting and closed off a little which you didn’t mind. She was insanely beautiful and she was around your age which made you feel a little bit at ease to know that you aren’t the only young person there.

The only reason you didn’t know her was because she was new as well, she recently joined as well and felt a little bit left out as everyone in here already knew each other well enough to feel comfortable around them.

An idea popped in your head as you smiled “Pick a person and I will show you something”

She narrowed her eyes as she tried to figure out what you are trying to do “Okay? Steve Rogers”

You looked at him and called out “Steve!” His attention was now on you and you spoke up again “Do a chicken dance”

He looked confused and refused to do that, which you just shrugged your shoulders at and closed your eyes when you opened them they turned white and his too and suddenly he was dancing just like you wanted. The redhead had a smile across her face as she was amazed to what you could do, and so was everyone else in the room. You broke the trance and Steve stood there completely clueless as everyone around him laughed.

You looked at her “Okay now it’s your turn”

She just smirked as she blurted out couple seconds in “Bruce is disappointed as he wanted someone to join them with the same level of knowledge as him so he can have a partner”

You narrowed your eyes at her “How do I know you’re not making that up?”

She turned towards the group and spoke up “Bruce I can’t believe you are disappointed in our recent recruitment”

He looked so shocked “How did you- Get out of my head!” and you both just laughed.

“I’m Y/n Y/l/n” You reached your hand towards her so she could shake it.

“Wanda Maximoff” She shook your hand with a small smile.

━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Couple hours later

You came back home, it was late and you expected Olivia to be fast asleep but your unresolved argument kept her up. You walked through the door and that’s when Olivia came out from the bedroom worried about you.

“Y/n?” She called out as you walked further into the house and saw her with something in hand.

“Olivia? What are you doing?” You eyed the weapon she had in hand and she sighed with relief.

She shook her head “I didn’t think you would come back today so I thought someone was breaking in”

You knew she still had some PTSD from that café incident so you didn’t think much of it “Of course I was going to come back home.. Why are you up?”

You placed your keys down in your usual spot and walked over to her after she placed the object down near her “I couldn’t sleep”

You reached for her hand and held it tight “It’s okay, I’m here, just let me go toilet and we can just lay in bed until you fall asleep”

Even if you were upset with how she reacted, you loved her and wanted her to feel safe.

She nodded and you did just that, you went toilet and then you both laid in bed after you changed into something more comfortable to sleep in, she was laying on your chest cuddled tightly into your body as if you was going to disappear.

She looked up at you, you could see in her eyes something was eating her inside out “What’s wrong?”

She sighed and sat up, you mimicked her actions and turned on the little night lamp you had so you could see better “I wanted to talk about the disagreement we had earlier”

You nodded and she continued “I know my reaction to what you told me was upsetting but you know how worried I am already when you put your life at risk helping people out a little, I just don’t want to lose you”

She cupped your face with both of her hands “I love you and I don’t want you to think I won’t support you but I’m just worried”

“I know and I’m sorry I didn’t ask for time and told you about it before taking the place. I was just so excited I just don’t want to hide” You played with your ring on your thumb to calm your nerves down.

“I know and now, you can finally be more than just the ‘Time Breaker’ vigilante”

You looked up at her from your hands and she had a small smirk across her face “You knew?”

She nodded “Of course, I knew you would never pass the chance to do anything that could save peoples lives and just so you know I am proud of you”

You hugged her as she giggled from the sudden attack, she hugged you back and you both fell back to your original position and fell asleep couple minutes after.

━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

3 months later

During this time, you and your girlfriend were on good terms but with missions getting in the way you never had time for each other, even if she said she was proud of you for doing what you always wanted, you knew she is still upset about it which caused some arguments and you would usually just spend your days in your room at the Avenger tower watching anything to take your mind off Olivia.

Today was one of those days, you wanted to spend your 4 year anniversary with her before you had to travel to the compound for the mission but she had other plans for that day with her friends so you ended up walking out whilst she was getting dressed and ended up here.

Did she bother to call you? No, were you waiting for her to? Yes, you wanted her to say she’s sorry and that she actually had something planned for you but she was actually at a party because you saw her friends posting stuff on their social media.

You held the phone in your hand, staring at it waiting for it to light up and display an apologetic message from her but there was no luck, even though you was watching something, it just didn’t take your mind of her.

“Are you just going to stare at your phone all day?” A voice appeared from the door way which made you look.

You saw Wanda standing with her arms crossed and she gave you a smile as she walked over to you when you didn’t say anything “What’s wrong?”

You shrugged, you placed the phone on the night stand and sat up, not saying anything which Wanda took as an invitation to sit down near you.

Over the course of 2 months, you two were close friends but were still learning a lot about each other. For example during the team movie night, they all wanted to watch horror movies but you hated them. Of course you were teased for that but Wanda made sure they would choose something else. She wasn’t the only one who stuck by your side.

Natasha Romanoff did as well, she was quick to become your favourite person here, she was hilarious and could easily beat anyone here except Hulk because.. Well that dude is just not her size, though you could argue if it did come down to it. She loved playing pranks on the team and you soon become her partner in crime when it came to that, with your ability to control people’s minds you helped her do a lot of things like make people spill things or add too much spices to their food and watch them choke.

“It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it but I can’t let you look this depressing. Come join me in the kitchen, I’m cooking dinner this time”

You raised your eyebrows at her to tease her “You cook?”

She chuckled and rolled her eyes “Of course I do. Now come on” She grabbed your hand, you took your phone with you and you two walked hand in hand towards the kitchen.

You help the Sokovian out a lot actually, even if you didn’t really had time to cook before but you always knew how to. When you would finish your part, you would just lean and watch her with admiration at how concentrate she was but you would snap out of it, reminding yourself that you were in a relationship.

She brought the spoon up to your face so your attention isn’t turned towards your phone “Here, taste it” which you did and your face lit up at the different taste.

“Good? Am I missing something?” She asked a little worried but you shook your head still trying to process how good her food is.

“No! Its perfect, not only you’re dead ass gorgeous but also an amazing cook” You were too memorized by the food to even think twice what you were saying.

She blushed and before you had time to even correct yourself she quickly changed the subject “So will you tell me what’s wrong?” She looked up from what she was doing at you.

You sighed and looked down at your phone to see nothing and decided to open up “Today is mine and Olivia’s 4 year anniversary but she decided to spend it with her friends instead”

“At least you’re not alone today..” She said with a small smile on her face, trying to light up the mood.

You nodded and she questioned “So what are you going to do?”

You shrugged “I’m not sure but I know one thing”

She looked confused to why you stopped and suddenly, your eyes turned white when Tony barged in with his eyes white, she looked at both of you and within seconds Tony got ahold of flour as he dumped it over the Sokovian witch.

You broke the trance and looked at Wanda who was covered in white from head to toe and Tony who was lost at how he even got here as he held an empty bag of flour in his hand.

You laughed as she used her powers to throw some of the flour on you but you went back in time and avoided the attack which made her chase you around the kitchen “I teach you how to cook a good meal and that’s how you repay me Y/n. You wait”

You knew she was going to do something and you were right, she made you freeze in place and had an egg held in her hand, you knew what she was going to do, she walked towards you with a smirk across her face.

“You have no way out, you can’t rewind or control anyone. The only fate here is the egg to be cracked on your head” The red mist entangled with her fingers controlling your captivity.

Tony was going to just walk out without protesting but she held him as well which made him speak up “What did I do?” He basically whined but Wanda didn’t care.

“For all I know you could get someone to help Y/n, so you’re staying here” She stated which made Tony shake his head “Actually I don’t care-”

She used her powers to stick a cloth inside his mouth so he would shut up, you was laughing at the whole thing but suddenly the egg turned into 10 which were floating in the air and were ready to be thrown at you but she was waiting.

“Come on Wands.. You don’t want to do this..” You tried your luck but she shook her head “Oh but I really do” and with that all those eggs aimed at you, covering you with the egg goo, she walked up closer as she held the last egg

“That’s for the flour” and she just cracked the egg on your head making it slowly run down your head which made her laugh and she let you go.

That was a mistake

What she didn’t notice was that you were planning to give it back to her, and suddenly your body collide with hers, holding her tight making sure she has some of that egg too. That’s when her eyes widen at how close yous are, making yous both blush and you let go off her, that’s when the rest of the team walks into the kitchen that’s covered in flour and egg shells.

“What in the world happened here” Someone exclaimed from the team, whilst Natasha laughed.

━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

The next day

You ended up in Wanda’s room after the dinner, Nat did join yous for a while to watch some sitcoms but she wasn’t really into that, so she left later on when Wanda was drifting to sleep.

Somehow you ended up falling asleep along with Wanda, yous must’ve shifted in your sleep as now Wanda is cuddled into you with her head resting on your chest.

She has been awake for some time but she didn’t want to move, risking waking you up and parting away from her. She enjoyed your company a little too much, she always wanted to be around you, you made her days better, especially when she is having a rough day, she always knows she can count on you and that’s what caused her to fall for you.

When you joined the Avengers, that night you met them all, she was a little sceptic rather than welcoming, she sat away to avoid any interaction with anyone from the team, she was still a lot more closed off than she is now and when you approached her she knew she could trust you, it was a gut feeling.

Finding out you were in a relationship kind of bothered Wanda but she brushed it off, especially since there was nothing she could do about it. The more she got to know you the more she liked you, you were like a golden retriever; Happy, beautiful, smart but if someone pissed you off you was like Natasha which was why Natasha found herself hanging out more with you than the rest of the team.

Wanda looked up from where she was, staring at your relaxed featured, just taking in how calm you looked, her heart melting at the sight of you.

“Watching me sleep creepy lady?” You asked still with your eyes closed.

She tensed when you suddenly spoke up but relaxed within seconds when she rolled her eyes at you “No?” She had a blush across her cheeks for being caught.

You smiled as your hand reached to your face to rub your eyes and stretch out “Mhm sure”

Your raspy voice in the morning will be Wanda’s favourite thing from now on. The only girl you ever had in bed (besides your ex girlfriends), was Olivia and now that Wanda is here with you is.. different. You would be lying if you said that you didn’t like it but you did, her embrace was comforting.

Yous decided it was best to get up and cook breakfast before the whole team wakes up. Well Wanda cooked breakfast whilst you quietly stare at her, drinking your coffee at the same time.

Natasha was the first one up from the rest of the team and ate Wanda’s breakfast, she wanted to spar with you so you agreed, it was a good idea to just get fired up before the mission. She was good and you needed some hand to hand combat skills in case your powers refuse you.

━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Couple hours later

Travelling to a Hydra base wasn’t something everyone was thrilled about, the whole team was needed for no reason, you and Wanda could just take the whole place down with your powers but this mission was tricky, yous didn’t need to just beat them up but you needed their data and blow their base up, S.H.E.I.L.D. intel wasn’t the best, they barely gathered anything apart that this base had some dangerous weapons that’s why you were needed.

As soon as the whole team along with you jumped out of the Quinjet, you expected agents to be flooding the field but there was nothing. You was instructed to go near the base just in case they flooded out since you could rewind time, so just like that you started to approach the base.

You walked inside and there was no one there, you expected it to be heavily guarded but no one was seen, so you went further inside as you reached to your ear to inform the team, that’s when the guards made their way out and spotted you.

You pressed your ear so the team can hear you whilst you talk down the guards, just in case your powers failed so the team would be informed to help you “Look fellas, I’m here.. you are here. Can we not be buddies?”

You tried but they launched at you and you simply went back in time, just enough before they spotted you. You reached to your ear and spoke quietly “This must be a set up, the guards know we are here they are waiting for us to approach the base, I can sneak inside and just do the work quickly. Just wait for my signal”

The team agreed that you should do it but Wanda protested “No Y/n! Come back and let’s do this together”

“Maximoff, Everything will be fine besides I can rewind if anything goes wrong. It’s okay.” You spoke and started to make your way towards the guards, you hid behind them and controlled one of their minds as you made them fight each other, knocking them out, you pulled their bodies to where you were so other were not alerted. You took their weapons and attached it near the bomb that you was suppose to plant.

You made your way to the core of the base and there was no one but you knew better, you closed your eyes and searched for any soul near you which you did find, you forced them to the centre and pushed them as their body was shot multiple times.

You reached to your ear to let know the team that you made it “Okay, I’m at the core of the base, I have the pen drive, I’ll plant the bomb as soon as the data starts to transfer.”

The team sighed in relief that you were still alive but they were pretty much surprised that the amount of guards. Wanda and Natasha knew something was wrong but they couldn’t go against orders, even if they were your orders they were approved by everyone.

You plugged the pen drive inside the slot and placed the bomb near the weapons, the timer will start as soon as you let Tony know to start it, you started at the huge screen as the percentage increased. You knew it was too good to be true to just leave without being detected.

A sharp sting in your shoulder and thigh occurred that muted the gunshots from behind you as you turned around to see the guard with a gun in his hand and little smoke coming from it, making you aware that you have been shot twice, you looked back you at the screen which was closer to finishing, as you controlled his mind and made him shoot his leg himself and knock himself out.

The focus for the mission was keeping you busy from the pain but as soon as you moved your leg, the pain was stronger which made you groan and limp towards the computer, as soon as it hit 100%, you snatched the drive and slowly made your way towards the exit where you saw about 5-10 guards standing with their guns pointing at you.

You laughed a little and took the weapon attached to your belt as you started to shoot at them, they were shooting at you but they missed as you went back in time but each time you did the less energy you had, it was mainly because you was losing blood and was hit couple more times, you didn’t even notice until you moved from your place to hide behind something.

You reached to your ear, taking a deep breath and speaking “Tony start the timer.”

“On it” He spoke to your ear and soon enough his voice spoke up again “Okay, you have 3 minutes before the whole place blows up, can you make it?” He asked the question he didn’t want to, which he earned a shocking glare from Wanda and Natasha, they weren’t expecting that.

“Yeah, I’m on my way out” As you spoke, gunshots slipped through which made the team be more worried.

“Y/n do you need back up?” Natasha asked and there was no reply, they were about to run inside from the Quinjet but Tony started to fly above. You and him had a plan which the team wasn’t inform off, this way you wouldn’t be stopped, they thought they will be joining you but you was suppose to go alone.

“Tony what the fuck are you doing?” Natasha harshly spoke as she stared at him from behind but he didn’t answer.

Wanda worried stood up “We need to help Y/n!” But she was ignored as well.

You knew you didn’t have time but you hoped this will work out, the reason to why the team wasn’t needed was because that could cause a lot of problems like compromising the mission but they were there in case things went south.

You took a deep breath and with everything you had, started to run towards the exit, with the pain becoming more stronger, which had some guards there but you manged to knock them out with your mind control, you failed to notice that one of them pretended to be knocked out so when you approached the exit, you was shot again, this time nearer to your heart which punctured your lung, you knew this is bad but you went on.. At least tried to, right as you reached the end, you were close to dropping to the ground but that’s when the bomb went off, sending you flying into the air, several feet away from the base and where the Quinjet was.

You was barely breathing and barely conscious to what was happening around you, but one redhead made it towards you. You smiled at whoever was there and started to close your eyelids since they become so heavy.

“Oh my god, Y/n” A shaky voice spoke up, you could tell it was Wanda.

You tried to wave your hand to dismiss it but the pain was too much so you spoke up “It’s fine..”

She covered your mouth with her hand “Shut up and save your energy! You can’t die now”

You was trying hard to stay awake but it wasn’t working and the darkness was much closer than you really wanted, you passed out the second the Sokovian redhead lifted you with her powers.

━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Long couple hours later

The medical wing wasn’t keen on giving anyone any information about your condition which only worried everyone. Wanda barely left the waiting room in hopes that they will crack and tell her about you but nothing.

She wanted to barge in there and demand answers but she knew better than to delay your way to recovery. Wanda was more than worried, she was terrified, at the thought of your body going limb when she picked you up really scared her.

At the loss of her parents and her brother, she thought she would never open up to anyone but when you waltzed into her life, you instantly melted her walls with just one look, you made it easier to breath when she was around you, that’s why she can’t lose you.

Tony along with Natasha and Steve made their way towards Wanda, they knew she was upset.

she looked up, her blood boiling at the sight of Tony, she stood up with her eyes turning red “What do you think you’re doing here?” the question was laced with venom.

“Are there any news?” Natasha asked knowing that anything could trigger Wanda.

She shook her head but her glare didn’t leave Tony which angered her more, she wanted him out of this hallway, she wanted to see you smile and laugh.. Just be alive but you are in there with no updates.

“Look Witch, me and her had a plan before we went on the mission, she was suppose get out there before the bomb went off but obviously the plan didn’t work out exactly like we wanted, she was suppose to be on the Quinjet before it exploded, she knew it was a set up but she went anyways, we needed that data and now we are able to create better weapons because of it.” He tried to explain the best he could to Wanda, he felt guilty he didn’t let someone else come with you but they both knew it would be dangerous.

“Why didn’t you just let me or Natasha come with her!” She screamed, it made some lights flicker as her powers slowly emitted from her.

Tony took a deep breath “She didn’t want anyone, I tried to convince her to take someone but she said that would rather die than let anyone else suffer”

With his words, Wanda’s eyes turned back to normal as it filled with tears, she was so mad at you for doing such a reckless thing without even talking to her about it. Natasha approached her and gently wrapped her arms around Wanda, she was trying her best to keep her tears in but that was slightly impossible.

Doctor Helen Cho walked out to the scene, she made herself known by clearing her throat, immediately Wanda turned and stared at her, she was dreading this moment but put a brave face.

“This might be hard to hear but Y/n flatlined three times before going into a stable condition. Some of the bullets made their way towards further into her body, especially into her lung, it was difficult to even take it out but we did it and she should be okay, she lost a lot of blood so we put her into a medically induced coma to record quicker but she can easily slip into her own coma from so much trauma so we will be monitoring her for now” She spoke, explaining everything that went on inside that small room.

The only two things that stuck with Wanda was that you flatlined three times but you’re alright. She closed her eyes, trying her best to keep calm, as she sat back down in the chair, they all looked at the Sokovian, it was kind of scary to see her like this.

Natasha took it as an opportunity to ask if anyone can go in and visit you “Is visiting possible?”

Helen nodded “Yes but one at a time, too much people might disturb her”

Wanda stood up with the most dull face you could witness “How many times?”

Helen took a deep breath “She was shot 7 times”

Wanda nodded and just walked inside the room leaving the 3 behind, she needed to be there when you wake up, she knew how much you hated bright white rooms, she never knew the exact reason but she never asked, she wanted you to tell her.

━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Two weeks later

The air in the compound was thick with tense, especially since Wanda never wanted to leave your side but she was needed in some small missions, now that you was gone she was needed twice as much, you and her made missions seem so much easier but now that you are still in the coma, she was forced to leave you.

Wanda was currently after her mission, she was exhausted but she rushed to your side to be there when you wake up, she had a feeling you would wake up. She was there for hours but still no luck, that’s when there was a knock on the door which her head followed, she saw Vision.

She relaxed and walked outside to see him, he tried to convince her to go shower and rest but she didn’t want any of that, she just wanted to be here, you woke up during that time, your eyes scanned the room that’s when it landed outside the window to Vision and Wanda, you were so high on painkillers that you didn’t even notice any pain.

He was extremely close to her, his hand on her cheek and looked at her so lovingly, she looked sad and his other hand was on her hip holding her close. You wasn’t sure how long you have been out but it must’ve been long since Vision and Wanda are now together (Obviously they weren’t), at the sight of them that close, your heart broke. You had feelings for Wanda for sometime now but Olivia was your girlfriend and you knew you had to bury those feelings, especially now that Wanda is with someone else.

You hated bright rooms so your breathing increased, slowly having a little panic attack when you came to your senses, the heart monitor started to beep faster which caught Wanda’s attention.

She ran inside leaving Vision, to which he just walked away a little disappointed, she held your hand “It’s okay Y/n, I’m here sweetie”

You relaxed at her touch but your breathing didn’t steady “Y/n look at me and follow my breathing”

She started to breathe slowly in and out which you mimicked, you was relaxing, she always had that effect on you, tears started to run down your face which Wanda carefully wiped with her thumb.

You leaned into her touch as you blurted out “Take me home please..”

Your pleading broke Wanda’s heart, she knows how much you hate these rooms “Y/n..”

“Please Wan.. I can’t stay here, its too cold and lonely” You begged her and her grip tighten around your other hand.

“I’m here Детка (baby), and I’m not going anywhere” She spoke as she stared into your eyes.

“I can’t stay here” Another tear slipped down your face, Wanda nodded with a sad smile “Okay.. I will talk to the doctor but for now rest, I will be here моя любовь (My love)”

You didn’t understand what she was saying, for all you know she could call you an idiot but the way she said it, just made you want to listen to her talk all the time.

You nodded and a thought struck you “Wanda…” She hummed as an answer to which you continued “Could you lay with me here until I fall asleep?”

Wanda wanted to just stay in your arms forever but to be asked to cuddle you till you fall asleep because you are terrified of this hospital room, made her even happier, she nodded and climbed next to you as you carefully hugged into her, with her scent filling your nose and her heartbeat you felt safe.

“Do you want to know why I don’t like bright white rooms?” you asked and she nodded.

You wasn’t sure if you should look at her because if you broke down it would be harder to stop but taking a deep breath you looked up and stared into her green eyes, they held this reassurance, she didn’t need to use her words, her eyes said it all

“When I was young, my mother and father decided they didn’t want me so they gave me up for some experiments..” You paused as a flashback of the white room appeared before your eyes, you exhaled shakenly “ All I really remember is the multiple white rooms and the cold empty feeling whilst they did whatever they did”

“So please.. Get me home, I don’t want to be here” Another tear escaped your eyes.

Her free hand cupped your cheek as she wiped the tear and nodded with a smile “You’ll go home, just rest”

It pained her listening to your past, as a little girl to be put through something like that, it must’ve been really scary. Wanda’s hand traced circles on your back, relaxing you, making you fall asleep with her. The red power coursing through her hand near your head as she gave you pleasant dreams.

“Sweet dreams Солнечный свет (Sunshine)”

#wanda x reader #wanda maximoff #the avengers #scarlet witch #scarlet witch x reader #wanda maximoff fluff #wanda #maximoff #avengers x reader #avengers x you

140 notes · View notes

upat4amwiththemoon · 3 years

Text

The Villain

Summary: Wanda is an Avenger, a hero. Wanda’s girlfriend’s father is a villain, though Wanda doesn’t know that. What happens when Tony Stark successfully kills him?

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader

Warnings: angst, some descriptions of violence, me not knowing how guns work (please tell me if I missed any!)

Word count: 1859

Prompts (taken from thecharactercomma.com): ‘A character finds out their best friend is destined to be the next villain’ and “You’re so convinced that I’ll hurt them that you haven’t considered that’s the last thing I’d ever want to do.”

a/n: If you want to, you can send me a request for a fanfic! I can write to any MCU, GOT, OUAT and TVD/TO characters. If you have some other show/movie in mind, request it and I’ll see if I have seen it! I’m not 100% sure how requesting works, so if someone would like to tell me I’d really appreciate it! But for now, I’ll just tell you all here. Feedback is greatly appreciated :)

Y/D/N = your dad’s name

A knock on the door awakens Y/N from her slumber. She grumbles, looking at her surroundings for a moment. A blue hue hits coming from the TV hits her face gently. She fell asleep to her couch while watching Wanda’s favorite sitcoms to understand the references she threw around their conversations. Knocking comes from the front door again. Y/N stands up and quietly walks to the door, looking through the peephole to see who could be at her door at this time of the night. She sees Wanda’s ragged face.

Y/N opens the door. “Wanda, what are you doing her?” She pulls her girlfriend into a tight hug. “Are you okay?”

Wanda nods, breathing in Y/N’s comforting scent. “I am now. Can I come in?”

“Of course, come on. I’ll make you something to eat and you can take a shower if you want to, okay?” Y/N starts walking around the apartment after sitting Wanda down to the couch. She starts going through the kitchen cabinets, looking for something to make for her. Deciding a sandwich would do for now, she starts taking out the ingredients.

“Bewitched.” Wanda comments from the couch.

“Huh?”

“You’re watching Bewitched.” Wanda smiles widely, her heart fluttering. She knew sitcoms were never Y/N’s favorite genre of TV shows, but the fact she was watching them for Wanda, made her feel warm inside. “How do you like it.”

Y/N giggles. “It’s actually better than I thought. I see why you like it so much.” She comes to sit next to Wanda, giving her the sandwich she made. “Do you want to tell me what happened?” She asks, nodding at the dirt and small bruises on her face.

“A mission.” Wanda sighs. “It was a rough one, but still successful I suppose. We almost had him, but people would’ve died if Tony hadn’t killed him.” She takes a pause, taking a piece of the sandwich and swallowing before talking again. “It would’ve been better if we got him alive, but this is a victory nonetheless.”

“Who? A big bad villain?” Y/N smirks playfully.

Wanda giggles, shaking her head. “One of the baddest, Y/D/N.”

Y/N freezes on her place. Her eyes turn wide and her breathing shallows. Wanda doesn’t notice the change in her posture right away, instead, she continues talking about the mission. How he had kidnapped bunch of people and murdered two men, who were most likely ex business partners. Y/N knew that already, her dad had told her very early on that he hurts bad men. That some people might call him a bad man, and her was okay with that, because there were even worse men in the world. He never killed innocent people, he did hurt them for his own advantage, to distract the heroes from stopping him doing his main goals. The two men he killed today were in fact previous business partners, but they did horrible things for fun. Shot endangered animals, drugged and did bad things for women, there were even rumors they hung around in pedophilic rings. When Y/D/N found out about these allegations, he stopped working with them and killed them. Just like that. Killing was never a problem.

“Love?” Wanda touches Y/N’s shoulder, bringing her out of her head. “Are you okay?”

Y/N nods, looking straight ahead. “I need to do something.” She stands up, brushing Wanda’s hand off of her. “You can stay here and do whatever, I’ll be back before morning.” She starts changing her clothes into more decent ones than her oversized t-shirt and sweats.

“Where are you going at this time?” Wanda stands up, following her around, the sandwich now forgotten.

“I just need to go, don’t worry about it.” She gives Wanda a quick kiss. “I’ll be back before you know it.” She walks out of the door, leaving Wanda to stand in front of it all alone.

Y/N sobs inside Stefan’s, who is her father’s right hand man, arms. He is holding her tightly, also feeling devastated from the loss of his best friend. Three other men stand around them, hanging their heads down, sad and ashamed they couldn’t save him. Other people liked to call them a gang or a mafia, but they didn’t see themselves like that. To them, they were just a big family that happened to kill bad people. Of course, others wouldn’t see it like that.

“You know what happens now, right?” One of the men ask as Y/N’s tears subside.

She backs away from Stefan. “No, I don’t.”

“Your father left you a list of names, you have to continue his legacy.”

Y/N stays quiet. She had to wear his mask and become a new him. It was always meant to be hers, just not this soon. She picks up the slightly broken and dirtied mask from the ground, turning it around in her hands. It feels heavy. The mask is originally black, though now it’s coated in blood red paint. That’s what they did, made the mask redder after every kill. Now it had to be cleaned back to its original color. The cycle begins from the start after the mask passes to the next generation.

“I don’t think I’m ready.”

Stefan sets his hand on her shoulder, rubbing it in a comforting manner. “I know this is sooner than we thought, but you have to be ready. It’s your job now.” He digs a paper from his pocket, giving it to her.

The paper is full of names, some of them crossed off. Every name on the lost had done something horrible to get a place on the list. What was considered horrible, was up to the maker. All of the leaders made a list, it was their life goal. Unless they died, then the next person had to cross off the rest of the names. Only after it they could build their own.

“You have to finish it. Kill them for your father.”

“And Stark.” Another man comments, his voice full of venom when he spits out Tony Stark’s name.

“I’m not going to kill Stark.”

They don’t know she is friends with him and the rest of the Avengers, or that she is dating the Wanda Maximoff. Even her father was in the dark about this. It’s not like Wanda knows about her father either. She just couldn’t get the words out of her mouth.

“What? He killed your father! He deserves to die.”

“He is not on the list. I’m not killing him and that’s final.” Y/N commands, her voice rough. She didn’t recognize it. It wasn’t like her to yell or to be cold. Now, she had no other choice.

The man nods, silencing himself.

Y/N glances at the list. Sighing, she stands up straighter and gives the mask to Stefan. “Clean it up, we have work to do.”

After a week, four names have been crossed off the list. The Avengers never got close to catching Y/N, because she knew them. She knew their priorities when it came to missions. Get every civilian out of danger. It was easy to cause a distraction that included innocent people without actually hurting them. Just like her father did.

Y/N punches the man. She is at a bank vault with the owner while the rest of the men are holding the workers and customers hostage in the main area of the bank. It was working flawlessly, at least so far.

“Do you know what you’ve done?” The man whimpers and shakes his head. “No? You have no idea what these pictures were doing in your computer?” Y/N shows him a few pictures she printed out. The man is looking away, not wanting to show any reaction to the photos. “You’re disgusting.” She holds up a gun to his forehead, clicking the safety off.

“No, no! Please, please let me go! I was forced to take them! I didn’t want to, please.” He starts pleading.

Pathetic.

“So, you did take the pictures?” The man nods, his whole body is shaking in fear. “I need you to say it.”

“I took the pictures!”

Y/N hums and shoots him straight through his brains. Spitting on the man’s dead body, she starts walking away from the vault. “I’m done down here, we’re ready to leave.” She communicates to her men through an ear piece. When she hears confirmation from Stefan, she starts jogging to the back door, ready to leave everything behind.

But life wasn’t on her side today.

A familiar with descends in front of her, stopping her to her tracks. “You aren’t going anywhere.” She growls, her eyes gleaming red.

Y/N stares at her. She raises her hands over her head slowly, dropping her ear piece and smashing it under her foot. Her men knew what to do, they didn’t need her guidance anymore.

Wanda frowns slightly, but covers it up quickly. She didn’t expect her to give up so easily. Y/N rips off her mask and throws it to Wanda, showing herself. Wanda gasps. Her stance falters. “Y/N?”

“Hey, you.” She gives her a weak smile.

“Wh-What are you doing here? Why are you wearing that mask?”

“He was my father, Wanda.” She nods towards the mask. Wanda’s eyes widen even more if that’s physically possible. “I had to continue what he left behind.”

“Killing people?”

“Bad people.”

“What are you talking about? Those people up there aren’t bad people!” Wanda glances at the gun in Y/N’s hand. “Drop your gun.”

“You’re so convinced that I’ll hurt them that you haven’t considered that’s the last thing I’d ever want to do.” Y/N ignores Wanda’s command. “My intention was never to hurt them, they were merely a distraction.”

“A distraction?” Wanda scoffs. “They are people, Y/N, not distractions.” Her stance changes again, it goes back to the hero Wanda. “Did you do everything that happened this week?” Y/N nods. “Drop the gun.”

“I’m not killing innocent people, only those who deserve it. So did my father.”

“Your father killed the previous president!”

“He was a rapist and a liar!” Y/N yells, making Wanda waken her magic. “He was a bad person and he deserved to die.” She says, now more calmly.

“No one deserves to die.”

“What about Hydra? Thanos and the chitauri? Ultron? My father? They are all dead. Did they not deserve it?”

“We had no other choice.”

“Neither do I.”

The two are staring at each other, quietly, both wondering what was going to happen now.

“I’m not going to come with you.” Y/N whispers. “I have a job to do.” When Wanda doesn’t answer, she picks up her mask and puts it back on. It covers her whole face. “I still love you.”

“I know.” Something takes Wanda’s attention away from Y/N, most likely someone talking to her through comms.

Y/N uses the moment to her advantage and runs away. Wanda could’ve stopped her, easily, but she didn’t. She chose not to.

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff #mcu #marvel #marvel fanfiction #fanfic #angst

377 notes · View notes

lovelybarnes · 3 years

Text

god- l. laufeyson

pairings: loki laufeyson x reader, mentions of other avengers x reader

warnings: mentions of blood and injuries, veryyy little angst

about: requested! loki gets captured by avengers and healer!reader watches him

a/n: thank you so so much for requesting! i am so sorry it took me this long to finish it, and it came out so much longer than i planned, but i didn’t want loki to be ooc, i hope this was good!!

part two

the words you’ve been reading over and over again are beginning to blur. you can’t find it in yourself to care too much, instead choosing to shut the book and stare at the door. your fingers are tapping on the hard plastic protecting the thin cot underneath you, and you try to concentrate on the noise rather than the worry you can’t seem to shake.

they were supposed to be back by now, you think, teeth finding your bottom lip. you weren’t allowed on this mission. while they said the reason you were staying was because they didn’t need everyone, the blatant absence of every single avenger and extended hero said the opposite. you knew the reality was that the threat you weren’t even informed about was greater than usual, and while you had powers, they weren’t as helpful as others when it came to fighting.

so you were stuck waiting for the teammates you hadn’t heard from for nearly ten hours, only able to stand by until they inevitably came back with cuts and bruises for you to fix. halting the thought of if before you could think more of it, you stood, beginning to set up all the medical equipment you usually use for when they arrive. you’re distracting yourself with pointlessly organizing popsicle sticks that you won’t need when you hear the unmistakable sound of footsteps on the hallway. you immediately look out your open door, expecting to see the avengers, bringing the smell of blood and exhaustion, not… loki.

you can’t seem to stop how your lips part and your eyes follow him as he nears, suddenly catching his eyes through the movement of the agents surrounding him. your face heats when his lips quirk up in a small smile, sending you a flirty wink before he’s passed and you are left staring at the trace of him. you’re in a trance, and as much as you’d like to blame it on the god’s magic, you know it’s simply how attracted you are to him, even when you know you shouldn’t be.

you’ve never had a conversation with the god, barely been in the same vicinity as him, and your mind seems to be flooded with him. the avengers rarely talk about him, and on the occasion they do, it’s never remotely kind. you understand why- you saw the damage he’d caused in new york, but the more you read on him, the more you can somewhat understand why he did it, as inappropriate as it is. you’d asked thor to bring you books from asgard that loki has read and asked him to tell you about loki.

you can’t help it- the god is intriguing; it’s so magnificent how powerful he is that it nears terrifying, and he’s so stunning you’re concerned you’d make a fool of yourself in front of him, or cut your fingers on his cheekbones (although how the hell would your fingers get there? you prefer to not think too much into your impossible fantasies).

you’re not even completely certain that what just happened actually happened- because there is no way loki laufeyson looked at a puny mortal like you and didn’t gag.

a hand dropping on your shoulder is what snaps you out of it, turning around to see sam and bucky, “you good?” sam asks, and you nod, scanning the men for the injuries they came to you for. sam has a large gash along his thigh that you can see through a slash on his uniform, and forming bruises along the rest of his body, tiny cuts scattered on his face. bucky is considerably better, his speed healing is helping. there is dried blood that you’ll clean later on his face, small and slightly more serious cuts all over him but already healing, and a clearly dislocated shoulder that he set.

“alright, sam, you know the drill. bucky, please don’t grab any medical supplies and stitch anything like last time and just let me do my thing,” you request, lowering the stretcher so sam doesn’t stress any of his injuries when he sits. “lay down so i can get to work on that cut on your leg, sam.”

you help him on the bed and let him settle down by himself while you soak gauze in antiseptic for bucky. sam’s shirt is off when you turn back, holding back a wince at the darkening bruise splayed on his abdomen. you cut away his pants, wiping away all the blood surrounding the wound and cleaning it with water. “clean,” you mutter, lightly dragging your fingers along the wound, a warm pink sparkling where your touch had been, disappearing with the slice in his skin.

sam sighs when it’s all healed, looking down at his leg, “i am never getting used to that,” you hum a laugh when you move to some of the smaller cuts on his face, all of them healing with a simple move of your fingers. the yellowing that was beginning to form along his abdomen fades back into his normal skin color when your hands drift past them, and he smiles in satisfaction.

“well no broken bones this time,” you point out, patting his leg proudly. he grins, sitting up, “you proud of me?”

“very,” you respond, pressing a kiss to his cheek that relaxes all of his sore muscles, “you’re a gift to this world,” he thanks. you smile in response, sitting bucky down where sam was. sam picks up the clothing you always leave out, moving into your small bathroom to change while you work on bucky.

“how did it go?” you ask him, cleaning away the blood on his face. “not yours,” you comment on it, “i guess that’s good.”

“it went… as well as fighting a god can go,” he answers, you nod, “you fought a god?” you ask nonchalantly, as if you didn’t just have a strange encounter with said god. bucky nods, “loki. you saw him, y/n.”

your hands move in front of his face, warmth settling into the open wounds and closing them. “i was just making sure you’d tell me the truth. no one told me anything about this mission.” you pat at his arms, random injuries healing with a gentle pink. “no serious ones, right?” you ask, squinting at him as he shakes his head. “all of them healed down into small ones that you just healed.”

“okay, then,” you kiss his forehead, making his tense muscles loosen like sam’s. “do you know how much we appreciate it when you do that?” he asks, and you laugh. “making sure none of you are sore is a small thing, and i like doing it.” besides, thanks to that, you got natasha to warm up to your affection- she is now comfortable receiving hugs, and you consider that a win.

“so where’s loki going now?” you question, not noticing the three avengers behind you until tony answers, steve and natasha behind him. “one of the high security cells, you’re going to take turns babysitting him so he doesn’t try to kill everyone again.”

“i am?” you ask, motioning for the three to sit while sam and bucky leave. “not you, i don’t want anything to happen to you, but everyone else,” tony says, sitting in front of you. you roll your eyes in reply, “i’m not defenseless, tony. i’m an avenger for a reason. and it isn’t only because i can heal people.”

“why would you want to watch over him? rock of ages isn’t very interesting,” tony asks, you hold back the fact you think the opposite, continuing to pat at his cheek with a wet cotton swab. “it’s just sitting around and watching a man with an overgrown ego rant about evil plans,” natasha adds, making you shrug, “more than i usually do. most of the time, i have to sit around doing nothing until you guys come back, since steve won’t put me on missions,” you try to ignore how you’re defending someone who most of the people in this room consider a villain.

“we need to have you safe and intact in case anything happens,” steve defends. you sigh, having heard the same excuse multiple times before. “i know. doesn’t make feeling useless for most of the day any better.”

the topic is switched for the rest of the time they’re with you.

three days later, you haven’t even heard the god’s name. you can tell your conversation with tony ticked him off, and you’re worried he might have an idea of what runs through your mind when you think of loki, which explains the absence of anything loki-related. you’re disappointed, to say the least. the god you’ve been thinking about is in the same building as you, only a few floors below, locked inside a cell you know the code and have complete access to, and you can’t even think about him without the concern that tony might somehow find out. he’s been truthful about the babysitting; so far, each of the avengers have sat in with him, steve twice- you’re sure the second time was supposed to be you, but tony is infuriating and true to his word.

every avenger but you and natasha are gone today, though, and from the looks of the folder nick fury’s holding, walking down to loki’s cell where natasha is, it’ll be down to just you.

a few minutes later, you’re reading “the night manager,” when fury knocks on your door, making you look up. “you busy, l/n?” he asks, you shake your head, “have a mission for me?”

“yes. supervising loki laufeyson for the rest of the day, and preferably the night, too,” he instructs, an eyebrow raising when you haven’t moved from your seat, so you stand immediately, shutting your book with your finger bookmarking your page. “oh- yes, of course, sir. uh, i’ll get down there now, then,” you stammer, awkwardly squeezing past him in the doorway and heading to the elevator, “have a nice day, sir,” you wave, nearly bumping into a plant.

you always embarrass yourself in front of the man, which probably explains your limited interactions.

you try not to think about it during the elevator ride, foot tapping on the floor as the numbers lower until it dings. natasha is standing on the other side when the doors part, eyes meeting yours the moment they do. you smile at her, squeezing her arm when she passes to replace the kiss you’d usually place on her forehead to soothe the tense muscles you’re certain she has. she tells you to be careful in a whisper, unwilling to show anything to the god who is curiously examining you. the elevator hums as it closes, and you sit in the chair before the glass prison. “hello,” you greet with a small smile, slightly bowing your head before opening your book and flipping to the page you left off on.

it’s utterly useless, though. the words on the page are impossible to understand when you can feel his eyes on you, examining you in such a way, you’re sure he already knows more about you than you do about yourself. “it’s the night manager,” you say softly after a few excruciating seconds, setting the book down on your lap as you meet his eyes. “it’s a good book so far.”

your tone is light, and you think it’s part of the reason loki answers, “i have read it before. it’s… not completely terrible.”

“no way, i just got the god seal of approval on one of my books,” you say playfully, smiling at him before going back to reading.

“i have not seen you here before,” loki points out after a silent minute, and you nod in response, “that’s right, i haven’t gone down here since you came.”

there’s a dangerous smirk playing at loki’s lips, walking closer to you, “is it because you’re scared of me?” he asks, and you scoff softly. “you don’t scare me. you are… interesting. dangerous, of course, and i don’t agree with your actions, but i don’t think you lash out for no good reason.”

there’s a heavy quiet that follows your words, your gentle stare combatting loki’s suspicious one. you nearly pick up your book to resume until he speaks again. “you haven’t expressed your hate for me yet,” he observes, and you frown, “is that what they do? that’s not very nice.”

“neither am i, darling.” loki replies smoothly, making you shake your head, cheeks warming against your will at the pet name. “well, i don’t hate you. so i don’t see a reason to do that,” you point out.

loki actually looks… surprised for a split second, before his gaze sets on you, “and why is that?” he questions. you pause; you don’t actually know why. surely, you should- he attempted to take over your planet and hurt your friends, but you can’t bring yourself to hold any ill feeling towards him, not after hearing his brother talk so fondly of him even after all he’s put him through.

“i don’t know. i probably should, but i just don’t,” you respond in finality, trying to leave no room for the argument loki will surely bring. he quirks an eyebrow, watching as you stifle a yawn.

he surprisingly doesn’t elaborate, but you’re sure it was already on his tongue. your mind goes back to one of the previous things he’d said, and your frown returns, examining the god. you only realize it completely looks like you’re checking him out when he smirks, cocking his head, “would you like me to do a turn?” he asks, making you flush. “no, i- i was just-”

you let out a small puff of air, attempting to convert your thoughts into one coherent sentence, “are they feeding you correctly? i know shield is supposed to be humane or whatever, but some of the agents pick and choose, and-”

“do you always ramble like this?” loki cuts you off, and you shake your head, bashful, “not usually. but i’m not usually in the presence of a god.” loki smirks at that, “they haven’t. but as you pointed out, i am a god. thus i need very little food.”

the voice in your head that sounds strangely like tony is yelling at you to not care, because the person in front of you is evil- supposedly- and it would be highly inappropriate of you to care, but, like you usually do with tony, you ignore it, reaching into your pocket to get your phone. you type out that you’re hungry to maria, doubling your usual order of food with no questions from her but full of suspicion, you’re sure.

“what are you doing?” loki asks. “getting food. i’m not exactly sure what gods are supposed to eat, and it’s not like i can order a whole ham or whatever, but i don’t find myself loving the idea of starving prisoners.”

“why?” he asks, eyes slanted and head tilted like he tends to do. contemplating his question, you shrug, “because i can’t see why i shouldn’t.”

loki decides you’re bearable.

264 notes · View notes

midgardianweasley · 3 years

Text

I’ve got you, I promise

Loki x fem!Avenger!reader

Summary: Y/N has a nightmare about her mum’s death, her being murdered by HYDRA because of her powers when Y/N was a child years ago, her daughter hearing everything. Haunted by the memories, comfort is found in a certain God of Mischief.

Warnings: very angsty but fluffy/soft ending, Readers Mother Death

Word Count: 1662

Message/ask if you want to be added to the taglist <33

Requests are open loves :)

“Stay here, do not move, okay?” I could faintly hear her mumbling, hiding me under coats and blankets in the storage cupboard, I could feel her hands shaking, matching the scared expression she held. She was trying to put on a brave face for me, despite knowing that I could hear the booming explosions outside and the banging on the door. I didn’t want her to leave, I knew what would happen if she set foot outside that door.

“Please don’t go” I spoke, only to be hushed quickly, her thumbs caressing my face and wiping away the tears that refused to stop flowing. My grip on the end of her sleeves felt deadly, silently begging her to stay, hoping that if I hold her tightly enough, she’ll hide in here with me. Her lips were the last I felt of her, the gentle kiss full of love pressed against my forehead, her tears falling onto my cheek and mixing with mine.

“I love you, sweetheart” She smiled, her eyes beginning to glow purple. It was time to go.

“I love-”

Darkness. One turn of a key and she was gone. The sounds weren’t though. I heard the gunshots. The explosions. The men’s screams. I’m sure if the coats weren’t on top of me, I’d be able to hear the punches, it was that loud. I thought once the noise stopped, I'd feel relief. It was over, surely? She was coming back for me. She has to be. It was only when the door was opened, well, kicked in, that i’d realised. She wasn’t coming home.

I sat bolt upright, sweat pouring off of me as I tried to catch my breath. This was the third time I'd had the same nightmare this month. I put it down to it being my mothers birthday in the upcoming weeks, my subconscious must be taunting me. As I began to ground myself, reminding myself to take deep breaths, I noticed how dry my throat was. Water. I need water. Before I knew it, I was shuffling quietly towards the kitchen in the Avengers compound, trying to not wake anyone as I filled a glass and went to look out at the city. It was so quiet outside. So peaceful. I felt a pang of jealousy, ‘The city is getting more rest than I am’. The city that never sleeps. The irony.

It felt as though I stood for hours, watching cars drive the streets of New York and the occasional bystander pass their flat window, realistically it was only a couple of minutes before I heard someone clear their throat behind me.

“Can’t sleep?” Loki.

I turned slightly, smiling at the God standing behind me, holding up my glass.

“Thirsty.” I murmured before turning back towards the window, silently hoping he’ll return back to his room.

I had no problem with Loki, ever since the New York incident, we all agreed to be civil, besides the occasional bicker between him and Stark, but generally we all tried our best to co-exist. Loki and I often found ourselves in discussions, I’d tell him about how I became an Avenger and the different missions I'd been on and he’d tell me about his life back in Asgard. I usually love hearing about his tales, especially about his mother. It’s obvious in the way he talks about her that he adores her. However, I don’t think I could handle it tonight.

“Now now, I like to think that I know you slightly better than that my dear. You seem troubled.”

“Reading my mind there, Loki?” I questioned, receiving a chuckle and a faint smile as he walked to stand beside me. As I looked out the window again, I could feel his gaze burn the side of my head.

“Not so much as reading your facial expressions. Your eyebrows furrow a certain way when you’re troubled. May I?” He asked, holding his hand out towards my face. Despite not knowing what exactly he was asking, I nodded in response. His thumb gently pressed against my forehead, smoothing out what I assume to be lines of anxiety found there. It didn’t last long before I flinched backwards, trying to avoid his touch. Not there. Upon seeing his slightly concerned glance, I spoke again, still not meeting his eyes.

“I’m- I’m sorry. It’s not you.”

“No, no don’t be sorry. I shouldn’t have invaded your personal space. I must ask though, are you okay?”

“Yes”

He raised his eyebrow, nonverbally questioning my answer.

“No.”

“Would you like to talk about it?”

It was a strange question to me. I’d always kept this part of my life to myself. The rest of the team had no idea about this part of my past, sure, they knew my parents were out of the picture, but I hadn’t explained any further than that. This loss, I’d never shared it, never spoke a word about the nightmares or why I lock myself away on the same day every year. I don’t think they thought to question it. We all had our past, our memories, our losses. As Steve would so kindly put it, we walk it off. But here Loki was, God of mischief, standing before me and offering to listen to it. Something about the way he was looking at me, patiently awaiting for me to make the next move, I don’t really know what happened, I heard myself before my mind had processed it.

“It’s my mum’s birthday in two weeks.”

“I’ve never heard you speak of your mum” He spoke, appearing to look relieved that I had started to talk to him, however, still being patient with me and letting me decide how far I let this conversation go and what I say. The next sentence, I’ve never said aloud.

“She died.” My voice cracked. With arms crossed at my stomach, the glass of water long forgotten on a side table, my eyes finally met his. I could see the sadness floating in them, I’m sure he could say the same about me.

“I’m so sorry, love.”

“I was young at the time.”

“That can’t make it any easier”

“No, it doesn’t” I mumbled, tears now starting to fall again. I gave him a small smile, barely noticeable i’m sure, nonetheless, he returned a sympathetic one. His silence felt like a cue to continue, I breathed deeply as I started to talk again.

“It was HYDRA. They killed her. I never really knew the reason for sure, I assume it was because she wouldn’t join them and they saw her powers as a threat on the opposite side. She locked me away. Kept me hidden as she went to fight them off. She never returned.” The last sentence leaves my mouth as a slight whisper, my gaze returning to the city again.

“That’s terrible. I’m incredibly sorry for your loss, my dear. Is this why you’re up?” He asked, stepping slightly closer towards me, but still giving me my space. I nodded, hesitant to share more, but the look in his eyes and feeling him stood so close gave me a sense of comfort. Like I could trust him. He’s told me personal things about his life on Asgard, I can trust him with this.

“I can still hear everything. I can’t imagine how many men there were outside attacking us, but I could hear their pain. Their screams and the darkness haunts me. Not once did I hear my mum scream, I assumed that was a good sign, I still remember the spark of hope upon hearing the silence. But when S.H.I.E.L.D agents appeared in front of me, I remember feeling it fizzle out twice as fast. I thought it was her coming back. I didn’t think that her kiss and her ‘I love you’s’ would be the last I had of her.” My breaths started to shake again, remembering everything as I was saying it out loud.

“I didn’t- I thought”

“Shh shh, hey, hey, Y/N, Look at me, hey” The God spoke, crouching down slightly, his hands on my shoulders grounding me a little. His messy black hair and green pyjamas all looked like a blur through the tears pooling in my eyes.

“Deep breaths for me, in for 6, hold for 2 and then out. Do it with me” He spoke slowly and clearly, starting to demonstrate his breathing, trying to encourage me to follow. I started to slowly follow his lead, gradually feeling more air reaching my lungs with every breath we took. After a few minutes, he gently took my hand, and placed it on his chest, where his heart was

“Feel that?”

“Mhm”

He took my other hand and placed it at the same spot, but on my chest instead.

“Focus on the beats, okay?”

I nodded, still not relying on my voice to communicate for me. It helped a lot, following his breathing and feeling our heartbeats begin to settle down and fall in line with each other.

“Loki?” My voice sounded small, like a child.

“Yes?”

“Can I have a hug? Please?”

“Of course you can darling. C’mere” He stood up, opening his arms and beckoning me into them. Soon, his heartbeat could be felt right at my temple, it was more soothing than I had expected. We’d stayed like that for a while, tiredness had started to take over, something the man above me noticed.

“Would you like to stay with me tonight? You don’t have to, I can return you to your-”

“I wanna stay with you. Please.” I mumbled, barely audible mainly due to tiredness.

“Alright, let’s go. I’ll protect you from any nightmares. I promise.”

Loki may be the God of Mischief, known for his lies and tricks, but he kept to his promise as he held me through the night, using his seidr to settle my mind and anxieties. I’ve never slept so well, all thanks to him.

Taglist: @horrorxweasley

293 notes · View notes

plus-size-reader · 4 years

Text

Those Eyes

Bucky Barnes x Plus size!reader

Word Count: 1605 words

Warnings: A bit of an AU so keep that in mind

Summary: You knew there was something familiar about the man

——————————————————————————————————

You still had nightmares about the day your parents were murdered.

At the time, you had been a kid, no more than six years old, but you still couldn't get the memory out of your head. You were supposed to go with them, while your older brother Tony stayed behind but they never made it to the Bahamas.

When the car crashed, you had been asleep though you woke rather quickly when the car jolted to a stop.

The events that followed were a blur now, but there was one thing you remembered. There was a man there, a man who you had never been able to forget. When the car slammed into the hill, you slipped down behind your mother's seat, just as your father whispered for you to do.

Looking back, it was clear to you that he knew they were going to die, but he thought perhaps in trying to hide you, you may be spared.

You heard your mother shriek your father's name once or twice as he was struck, then she was killed shortly after. At that age, experiencing a car crash and a double homicide was too much to handle, which resulted in several developmental struggles growing up.

All you remembered was looking up and coming face to face with the man who killed your parents, though most of his face was covered with a dark mask. At this point in your life, you only remembered one thing

...Those blue eyes.

No matter what you did, you couldn't get that image out of your head.

For some reason, you had made it your personal business, even at that time to recall that one thing to memory. It was as if you thought a pair of eyes would be able to help you identify the person who murdered your parents.

Still, as foolish as it seemed, you couldn't help but see them everywhere. When you dreamed, you tried to recall any other details, but all that was left were those eyes.

For the life of you, you couldn't recall anything other than that. Maybe that was the reason you kept it to yourself, when you finally did realize what happened that night, many years later. After you were sure that man had left, you got out of the car and started walking down the road.

It wasn't long before a nice older couple picked you up and drove you to the hospital where you were positively identified and they called your brother, seventeen at the time.

Several people visited for the next few days, asking you questions about what had happened, but you had no idea. Eventually, they concluded it was an fatal car accident and the trauma had just affected you more than anything else.

For a long time after that, you didn't talk to anybody other than Tony at all, and while you'd come a long way since then, the nightmares had yet to stop.

In fact, you managed to do really well for yourself as an adult, using your above average I.Q and inheritance that you inherited to get several degrees in microbiology and chemical science.

He had always had much more of that dramatic flair, while you chose to focus more on the physical mediums and functionality of it all. However, as busy as you were being a creative genius, Tony was quick to bring you in on the Avenger's initiative.

It was just something that seemed so obvious to him.

S.H.I.E.L.D and more specifically, everything that the Avengers stood for had been your father's pet project and was in many ways, his legacy. There was no way he was going to be able to partake in that without his Brainiac little sister.

In general, you kept to yourself, helping out remotely or technically but something like a threat to national security was the kind of thing you had to get in on. There was no way that you were going to be there through facetime and scattered texts.

So, you got a flight.

That was how you met the rest of the Avengers, and in turn, The Winter Soldier.

The first person who greeted you at the door was Pepper, who you had begun to regard as a friend as well as the sister you'd never had. "Hey, you made it" she smiled, reaching you in a huge hug.

You only smiled, setting down your bags to envelop her fully, greeted fully by the smell of her lilac perfume that she wore almost every day. It was the same as every other time you'd been around her, but it felt like home in a lot of ways.

In your life, few things brought you that comfort of home so you took it where you could get it. It was the same feeling you had when you hugged Tony and smelled the mix of expensive cologne and bourbon on him.

That reminded you of your father.

"It was a bit of a flight but I'm glad I got in before midnight" you grinned, separating from her after a few seconds and turning toward the small crowd that had gathered behind her in your greeting.

"Look what the cat dragged in!" you heard, only getting a few seconds warning before your older brother tackled you in an equally huge hug, not even bothering to keep from nearly knocking you off your feet.

He hadn't seen you in months and for the two of you, that was far too long. Growing up, you had been nearly inseparable, even with the age gap between you with Tony practically raising you. In a lot of ways, it felt right to be here again, even with all that had changed.

...Even with that huge group of strangers right behind you.

"Tony, are you going to introduce me to all your friends?" you asked, doing the socially acceptable thing, even though you had read all there was to read about every single person here.

The only complete and total strange was the dark haired man in the back, leaning against the wall. You had no clue who he was, but you thought it best to just wait until he was introduced to you to admit that.

"Everyone, this is my sister. Sister, this is everyone" he winked, earning an eyeroll from you. Of course he wasn't just going to react normally to this sort of situation. He had to make everything so much more difficult than it had to be.

You smiled, an awkward little wave all you could come up with now that the pressure was on. It made you want to crawl into a hole and never leave, but luckily, everyone seemed to be just as gentle as possible.

If nothing else, they respected you.

"You've been studying my DNA, isn't that right?" Steve piped up, thinking back to when Tony had asked him for a blood sample, citing something about his nerdy little sister trying to figure out what made him the way he was.

You nodded, doing your very best to ignore the strangeness of the sentence. It was true that Howard had raised you with a bit of a super soldier obsession and you'd been determined to crack the code to the serum since you were fourteen.

"Yeah, it's a slow process but I'm making progress nonetheless" you allowed, smiling as a way to somehow convey how thankful you were that he allowed such a strange request with minimal judgement.

Someone had come up with a successful serum all those years ago, when the technology was far less advanced, so there was no reason you shouldn't be able to reverse engineer it with your current skill.

It was just going to take time.

"Well, maybe you could take a look at Bucky under a microscope. A second trial couldn't hurt, right?" the blonde suggested then, and as much as you didn't really want to talk to the mystery man in the corner, Steve was right.

More data was always a good thing, and these two men where the only living specimen for your project. If you had a chance to survey him, it would be in your best interest to do so.

"There you go. We'll just keep you busy while you're here so you can't leave" Tony chuckled, leaning down to press a soft kiss to your cheek before heading to the other side of the room, down a long hallway.

At first, you didn't venture to follow him, assuming he was just going to go get something but that changed rather quickly when he turned back to you.

"Come on, I've been working on a surprise for you"

...And a surprise it was.

You followed your brother down the long hallway to the final door on the end, where you found a huge lab. It was beautiful, and with the mounting promise of more data just on the horizon, you couldn't wait to get to work.

"I'll leave you to it. Love you kid" he hummed, leaving without so much more to you, which left you with the dark haired man. You had yet to get a good look at him yet, intimidated by his hulking, musclebound frame.

It wasn't until you spun around to ask him if he actually wanted to give you a blood sample that you stopped in your tracks, dropping the test tubes you'd been fiddling with to the floor. The glass shattered at your feet immediately but you hardly noticed.

As soon as you turned toward him, you once again came face to face with those blue eyes that haunted you.

357 notes · View notes

ayybtch · 3 years

Text

The One

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x f!Reader

Summary: Things are going up and down for you as you try to navigate life after your breakup with Bucky. Everything leads to an accidental run-in with him at a coffee shop that leaves you and Bucky wondering if things could have been different. Based on the song The 1 by Taylor Swift.

Warnings: This is an angsty fic. The reader is actively struggling with mental illness and a breakup. There are mentions of being on antidepressants and symptoms such as anxiety, insomnia, and sometimes not having the energy for personal care, but nothing in-depth.

Word Count: 11,261

A/N: I owe a very special thank you to @borkingbarnes, who has supportively been screaming at me for writing this ever since I told her this idea and gave me some brilliant suggestions during her beta read. The dividers were made by the lovely @whimsicalrogers.

“So, how have the new meds been treating you? Are they still making you nauseous after you first take them?”

You looked across the room at your therapist and shook your head, “No, they’re not making me nauseous anymore. I’ve been making sure that I’ve got food in my stomach first and not just a cup of coffee. I’ve also been better about taking them at the same time each day,” you said.

She smiled at you. “Do you feel like they’ve been helping?”

You shrugged and offered a half-smile back. Not satisfied with your answer, she continued probing. “Well, do you feel like you have more energy than on the other meds? Are you sleeping more….?” She trailed off at the end, voice hopeful.

“Oh. Yeah, I have been sleeping a little better. I’ve been sleeping closer to 5 hours each night, though it’s still taking a really long time for me to fall asleep. I’ve had more energy but I don’t know if that’s because of the meds or the sleep?” You trailed off a bit at the end, unsure of if that truly answered her question.

“It could be a mix of both. I’m glad to hear you’re sleeping more though, you weren’t getting very much when you first started seeing me.” She offered you another smile before adjusting herself in her seat and continuing, “Now, what have you been doing with this extra energy? Any new hobbies, catching up with friends, going on dates, anything like that?”

You shook your head no. “I don’t have much of a friend group anymore, not since…” your voice faded before the sentence finished. You closed your eyes and shook your head slightly. Pull yourself together. “I am meeting Natasha after this, actually. She and I were friends before everything and she’s the only one that’s really stuck around since. It’s been about a month since I last saw her so I’m looking forward to seeing her.” The therapist nodded and offered a sympathetic smile that made your stomach turn. You decided to continue before she chimed in.

“I’m running again too. I used to go on a nightly run before things got bad. It’s not for as long or as far as I used to but it’s better than sitting on the couch, I guess.”

She nodded and began writing on her notepad, “That’s wonderful. What do you enjoy about your runs?”

Her question was unexpected and it took you a minute to answer. “It’s peaceful. It’s one of the few times I can shut my brain off and zone out. Though, if it’s a bad day it doesn't always work.”

She nodded and paused, as if trying to carefully choose her next words. “One thing I’ve noticed whenever stuff comes up is that you always talk about ‘before’, but what about the ‘after’? Have you thought about trying to get back out there and start your ‘after’?” An uncomfortable knot formed in your stomach as she spoke.

“I don’t think I’m ready for that yet,” you whispered.

She pursed her lips but didn’t say anything. Eventually, she nodded and continued to make notes.

***

The session continued for another half hour before it ended with a smile and a brief conversation with her secretary, confirming your appointment for the same time next week.

As you stepped out the door, you let out a sigh of relief. Therapy sessions were hard. Even though today’s session had been relatively mild, the process was still draining and left you feeling exhausted most days. It really helped though and making the decision to go was one of the best decisions you could have made for yourself. A smile settled on your face as you pulled your jacket tighter across your chest before beginning your walk to meet Natasha.

You had discovered soon after starting therapy that walking to and from the appointment gave you the time you needed to prepare yourself for the session and unwind after. The hustle and bustle of New York created the perfect background noise for you to organize your thoughts. Most days it helped you process the questions the therapist asked. Often, you answered them a little deeper than what you had in the session knowing that nobody would know the real answer except for you.

Guilt gnawed at you as you thought about it. Wasn’t the whole point of therapy to be honest? Were you still getting as much out of it as you could if you were completely honest? You shook your head and sighed. Sometimes there were things better left unsaid.

One of the many things that had been left unsaid had to do with what you missed most about being with him. You had shrugged it off when she asked, saying it was nice having a person around because it was less lonely. While true, the full answer was more painful than you felt comfortable admitting out loud. He had understood you in ways nobody else ever had and nobody else ever would again. It gave you the freedom to be unapologetically you every second of the day. The thought of not being known like that again and having to put on a facade felt like the loneliest existence the universe had to offer. It made your chest ache.

Today though, it gave you the chance to collect your thoughts before Natasha had the opportunity to interrogate you. To be fair, it wasn’t really an interrogation. She was far too gentle when she asked you questions, though you’re sure that’s one of the many techniques she chose from. Interrogation or not though, she would be watching you like a hawk the entire meal to make sure you were actually doing as well as you were claiming.

It wasn’t long before you were standing outside Natasha’s favorite Italian restaurant. She always recommended meeting up here purely because of the breadsticks. She swore they were the best in New York and ate at least three full baskets by herself each visit. You paused before entering, suddenly nervous about how it would go. There’s nothing to worry about, Natasha isn’t going to bring him up and isn’t going to push me past my boundaries. You weren’t quite as convinced as you would have liked to be, but you couldn’t delay it any longer as you stepped inside.

A blast of warm air surrounded you as you were greeted by the hostess. It didn’t take for her to lead you back to where Natasha was sitting, a glass of wine already in her hand. A second sat waiting on the table for you.

You walked over, bending down to give her a side hug and a peck on the cheek.

“You’re late,” she said reproachfully, eyes zeroed in on yours.

“I know, I’m sorry. My session went a little over today.” You pulled out your chair and sat down before continuing, “How are you? It’s good to see you.”

Natasha smiled brightly. “I’ve been good. I’ve been really looking forward to this, I was so happy when you said yes. It feels like it’s been years since I’ve seen you.” You grinned slightly and she continued. “I’m sorry that it’s been so long since we’ve had a chance to catch up. Work has been keeping me even busier than usual. Stark has been working on all sorts of new tech developments and has somehow recruited me for testing.”

You nodded as you took a sip of your wine, “Nothing he’s made has killed you yet. That’s impressive.”

She snorted, “He’s lucky I didn’t flat out say no. His last update to the Falcon wings sent Wilson through the ceiling and landed him in the medbay for three days with a concussion.” Natasha noticed the look of concern on your face and waved her hand as she sipped on her wine. “He’s fine, don’t worry. All of the Avengers men have skulls harder than concrete.” The two of you burst into laughter at the thought.

A waiter arrived as your laughter died down to take your orders and to refill Natasha’s wine glass. You both thanked him as he turned to walk away. A quiet settled over the table and Natasha’s gaze landed firmly on you.

“So how have you been?” she asked softly, voice far gentler than anyone would expect from a former assassin. You shrugged and avoided eye contact.

“Some days are better than others,” you said, “Overall things are better than they’ve been for a while now though. My shrink has me on some new meds that seem to be helping and I’ve been working harder on doing little things to take care of myself every day, not just the good days.”

Natasha nodded, eyes still fixed on you. Slowly, she reached a hand out across the table and placed it on top of yours. “You know I’m always here for you, right? You can call me any time of day and as long as I’m not on a mission, I can be at your apartment within the hour.”

You felt a lump form in your throat at her words. You nodded quickly, eyes blinking fast to try and keep the tears that were welling up from falling. She gave your hand a quick squeeze before pulling back.

“Now where the hell are our breadsticks? This is going to be a failed meal if I have less than twelve in me before the main dish arrives.” Her words made you burst out laughing once again and succeeded in putting a smile on your face for the remainder of the meal.

***

“Are you sure I can’t drive you back to your apartment?” Natasha asked, wrapping her scarf around her neck as the two of you stepped out of the restaurant. You nodded at her and smiled.

“I enjoy walking, it clears my mind,” you said. She let out a disapproving hum but didn’t argue further. She pulled you into a bone-crushing hug before turning and walking towards where her car was parked. You watched as she stepped in and waved as she pulled out of the parking lot. You stood and watched until her car was out of sight before turning to start the walk home.

As it was on the walk to the restaurant, the busy streets provided the perfect background noise needed for you to quiet your mind. You focused on your breathing, allowing yourself to try and channel any residual nervous energy outward. With each breath, the faces passing by began to blur. Neon signs hanging in the windows of the shops you passed by became nothing more than a gentle glow in your peripheral. With each step you took, the background seamlessly blended together more and your focus on yourself heightened. A sense of calm settled itself in your chest. The feeling grew stronger with each block you passed until a small smile made its way onto your face. That feeling ended abruptly as you turned around the next block.

There was a large crowd waiting at the bus stop, but your eyes focused on one man. You stared at his silhouette, panic building with each second. It felt like the wind had been knocked out of you and your feet had magically turned into cinder blocks. Is that...? No, it couldn’t be…

Almost as if he heard your thoughts, the man turned slightly so you could see his face, and a sigh of relief left you. You stood there a moment longer to examine his side profile. It wasn’t him; he just happened to look like him. He was about the same height and weight, with similar chocolate waves. Your eyes landed on his light brown leather jacket and a lump formed in your throat. He had worn a similar jacket the day you met. It felt like being thrown back in time as you continued to stare at the man in front of you.

Natasha drug you through a hallway, not caring about your protests to slow down. “I have someone I want you to meet.” She smirked as she spoke, leaving you to wonder what she was plotting.

A group of choices greeted the two of you as you entered the room. You waved at Steve and Sharon sitting on the couch as Natasha continued to pull you across the room to where two men were standing. One of the men was Sam, whom you had met the last time Natasha brought you to the compound. The other was Bucky Barnes. You hadn’t met him before but you knew who he was. It was impossible not to given how public everything about Hydra had become.

“Barnes, I have someone I’d like you to meet,” Natasha said, turning slightly towards you.

Bucky turned to look at you, offering a charming smile as he held out his hand. “Nice to meet you, ma’am. I’m Bucky.”

You shook his hand and introduced yourself, hoping to god you didn’t look as flustered as you felt. The pictures of him floating around on the news did not do him justice. Bucky was absolutely breathtaking. His smile lit up his eyes in a way no camera could ever hope to capture. His hair was cropped just above his shoulders, falling into a beautiful wavy pattern. You realized you were staring and felt your face get hot.

“Uh, I like your jacket,” you mumbled, hoping he hadn’t realized you were staring. The leather jacket was a beautiful light brown. It looked old, but well loved at the same time.

He smiled widely at you, “Thanks! Leather jackets are kind of my thing. Sam here thinks I have too many but there’s no such thing as too many leather jackets, wouldn’t you agree?”

As the memory floated away, you couldn’t help but think how Bucky probably would’ve gone up to the man to ask about his jacket. You chuckled at the thought. As soon as he walked away, he would’ve immediately started looking up where he could find one for his own closet. It didn’t matter how many leather jackets he had. He always wanted more.

The chuckle died on your lips and was replaced by an uncomfortable knot settling in your stomach. A heavy weight fell on your chest and you forced yourself to find the energy to trudge forward.

The remainder of the walk was a blur, but not in the same way it had been before. This wasn’t the good kind of blur that helped you to focus. It was the kind that left you feeling suffocated and as if everything would come crashing down all at once. That had been the first happy thought about Bucky since the two of you broke up. His presence in your thoughts was so strong, he might as well have been walking right next to you. You could practically feel his knuckles brushing against yours with each step you took. If you closed your eyes, you swore you could smell his cologne.

The harsh reality of how alone you were hit you as the greeting from your apartment’s doorman pulled you from your thoughts. You shot him a small smile before rushing inside and all but sprinting up the stairs. Your hands shook as you unlocked the door to your apartment, though you couldn't tell if it was from your thoughts of Bucky or from the sudden burst of energy that left you slightly winded.

Once inside, you rushed to your bedroom and changed into the first sports bra and pair of leggings you saw. You needed to get Bucky off your mind and the only way you knew how was to run. It was going to be a long run tonight.

The doorman waved at you again as you exited the building, surprised to see you again so soon. “Someone is feeling motivated today I see,” he joked. You shrugged and slowly began to jog.

***

It took a while to get into your groove, but once you were there you felt good. The movement helped settle the anxious energy that had been building since you had seen the man at the bus stop, while the steady breathing brought your focus back to the here and now just like it had before. That’s something else to mention if she asks about my runs again, you thought. These runs bring my focus to this exact moment in time.

That thought was lost as you passed a small, hole in the wall theater. Small groups were exiting the building, each talking excitedly amongst themselves about the movie that had just finished. The nauseous feeling from earlier came back as memories resurfaced. That was Bucky’s favorite movie theater. Every Sunday they played movies from the 1920s and 1930s. He used to drag you along with him whenever he saw one he remembered from his childhood. Each time he swore up and down that you were about to experience a cinematic masterpiece like no other and that it would change the way you looked at movies. You always rolled your eyes as he said it, but the magic you felt in that theater with him was like no other.

Movies made back then were so different from the movies made now. The characters felt so much more real. They were allowed to be people. Their faults and flaws didn’t take away from the good things about them. These films never failed to make you feel all of the emotions you were meant to feel and each time you exited the theater, you couldn’t help but wish you could’ve remained in that little bubble just a few minutes longer. Those bittersweet feelings about the ending never lasted long though, as Bucky would wrap his arm around your shoulder and proceed to talk your ear off about the movie until you made it home.

“You know Doll, the greatest films of all time were never made,” he said, smiling down at you.

You just laughed and shook your head.“Bucky that makes absolutely no sense.”

Bucky rolled his eyes dramatically, making you laugh again. “Think about it though, how many movies haven’t been made because someone decided they weren’t good enough for the big screen? How many stories have been brought into existence but never been told to another living soul?”

A car horn brought you back into reality. Bitterness crept into your chest as you processed the memory that had just played out picture-perfect in your mind. Those afternoons with him in the theater had been some of the best afternoons of your life. Even if you weren’t crazy about the movie, Bucky’s sheer excitement about it was enough to convince you of how wonderful it truly was. If only he had felt that same amount of joy in other areas of your relationship.

Your bitterness slowly began to turn to anger as you thought about the last few months of being with Bucky. Sunday matinees had stopped being a regular thing as Bucky’s work schedule picked up until they stopped happening entirely. His new position training new SHIELD agents and prospective new members to the Avenger ate away at his time. All of his time. It got to the point Bucky never stopped working. Even at home, his thoughts were on paperwork to be filed, training to be planned, or meetings to be run. You’d be sitting on the couch next to him trying to talk only to receive disinterested “hmms” or the occasional “That’s nice honey.”

You tried bringing it up to no avail. He always brushed it off and said things would calm down eventually and that he just needed you to hold out a bit longer. He never outright said his work was more important to him but the implication was there and you felt the weight of it every single day. You bit your tongue and played along for a while, but after several months of hearing the same excuses, you finally snapped. Unfortunately, so did Bucky.

“All you ever do is work. I can’t remember the last time we went and did something together. Hell, I can’t even remember the last time you cared enough to even ask me about my day. It’s like you don’t even want me around anymore,” you hissed, glaring at Bucky.

“Excuse me for caring about my fucking job. One of us has to if we’re going to continue affording this place,” he scoffed.

Ice filled your veins as you stared at him, fist clenched at your side. “And what is that supposed to mean?”

“Oh come on, we both know you’re barely getting your work done on time. You lay here on the couch all day watching TV. You’re lucky you’re allowed to work from home because you look like a walking disaster half the time. You’ve stopped wearing clean clothes, you hardly shower, you hardly eat, and you hardly sleep. Face it, you’re depressed.” His voice was flat as he spoke.

You furiously blinked back tears that were trying to well up as you processed his words. “First of all, I am not depressed,” you muttered, “Second, if I’m such a walking disaster then what are you even still doing here?”

“I am still here because I care about you. I have lost track of how many times I have asked you to get help. I’ve been where you are, I know what you’re going through and I know what it takes to come back from it. If you never bleed, you’re never going to grow. If you can’t move past this, then we -” he paused to motion between the two of you “- can’t move past this.” His eyes never left yours as he spoke. There was no malice in them, but there was also none of the kindness or warmth you wished for. His gaze just felt indifferent.

You remained silent as you tried to find words. Bucky continued watching you, waiting expectantly for a response. A response never came, however, and he let out a loud sigh.

“If you don’t have anything to say to that, then I think we’re done here. I can’t keep doing this anymore. I love you, but neither of us is happy. I can’t give you what you want and you can’t give me what I need,” Without another word, Bucky grabbed his coat and walked out the front door of the apartment.

That was the last time that you saw Bucky. He had sent you a text a few days later asking when a good time to come pick up his stuff would be. You responded begrudgingly, telling yourself that the sooner his stuff was gone the sooner your life could get back to normal. When the day came, you forced yourself to get out of the apartment. The thought of seeing him after what went down between you left you seeing red. When you finally went back after he left, you felt none of the happy emotions you had convinced yourself you would feel.

Instead, you felt the empty spots in the room. Every missing item you noticed felt like a blow to the stomach and caused fresh tears to well up in your eyes. Pictures were no longer hanging from the walls; random gaps were in the bookshelves; his leather jacket was no longer slung across the back of the chair he loved in the living room. You stumbled back to your room with your eyes closed, refusing to see what other memories had been ripped from their rightful homes. Once there, you collapsed on the bed and laid there for two days. It wasn’t until Natasha broke into your apartment to check on you after countless missed calls and ignored texts that you finally moved from that spot.

For the millionth time that day, your stomach twisted as thoughts of Bucky floated around in your head. Despite it all, you regretted not being there when he came to get his things. There was never a proper goodbye between you and the thought drove you mad sometimes. Maybe if I had been there, we could’ve worked this out. You scoffed at the thought, but couldn’t deny the heaviness lingering in your chest.

At times you considered reaching out to him, wondering if he would be willing to give you the closure you so desperately needed. Even if it was just over text, it might be better than the nothing you currently had. You still had his number. The two of you even still followed each other on social media. He liked what few posts you made, but you had never been able to bring yourself to look at the stuff he posted. The lines of communication were there, you just had to use them. But communication is a two-way street; if he wanted to talk to you, he’d reach out. Right? That thought had kept you from texting him more times than you could possibly count.

Questions about what could have happened that day swirled throughout your head as your feet pounded against the pavement. Could you have fixed things, or would it still have ended in breaking up? Could you have agreed to still be friends? Would you have at least been able to say goodbye, or would he have walked silently out the door again?

The thoughts continued to plague you until the ache in your legs was too strong to take another step. Out of breath, you looked around at where you stopped trying to figure out how far you had run. It wasn’t until you noticed the fountain about a dozen feet behind you that you realized where you were.

Tony had once rented out a plaza nearby for a 1920s themed fundraiser gala the first year you and Bucky were dating. The gala was the first public event you ever attended with him, though it certainly hadn’t been your last. Natasha had taken you shopping and helped you find a flapper-style dress leading up to it. The two of you did your hair and makeup together, giggling about how you felt like you were getting ready for a high school dance. When you stepped out of the room with Natasha, Bucky wasn’t able to speak. He spent the whole night staring at you like a lovestruck teenager, only to turn bright red whenever someone mentioned it.

Towards the end of the night, you and Bucky had drunkenly stumbled out of the plaza to escape the crowd and found your way over to this fountain. Rather, you had stumbled out drunkenly. Bucky wasn’t affected by human alcohol and hardly had any of the Asgardian mead Thor had so generously brought. While he was a little more cheery than usual, he wasn’t intoxicated enough to even pretend like he was tipsy.

A giggle left your lips as you stumbled forward. “Bucky, I need to find somewhere to sit down. I need to take off my heels.”

Bucky laughed at you and picked you up, carrying you bridal style. He spun around slowly as he searched for somewhere he could set you down. His eyes eventually settled on the fountain and began walking towards it. He carefully set you down before sitting down next to you. His eyes were fixed on you as you took off your shoes, a sigh of relief leaving your mouth as you did. You smiled over at him, before turning around to stare at the fountain in wonder. A giggle left your lips as you pulled up your dress and began walking around in the fountain.

You laughed any time you went through a jet of water. The temperature difference was soothing against your skin and almost left a tickling sensation as you passed. Eventually, you arrived back at where he was sitting and the smile on his face filled your stomach with butterflies. You bent down slightly to press your lips against his, your hands making their way through his hair. His hands landed on your hips and pulled you closer to him. You felt dizzy as he held you, though you weren’t sure if it was him or the glasses of champagne. You pulled away abruptly as an idea struck you, leading to Bucky’s eyes opening in confusion. His gaze fell upon the mischievous look you wore and he opened his mouth to speak. Before he managed to make a sound, your hands left his hair and were reaching down to splash water onto him.

He tried to catch your hands to stop you, but you stepped back just out of reach, but not far enough you couldn’t keep splashing him. Without a word, he reached down to take off his shoes and socks. A gasp left you as he stepped into the fountain and you rushed to hide behind the fountain’s centerpiece. He chased after you, hands eventually catching your waist and spinning you around to face him. He stared down at you, wonder and adoration written on his face. He slowly leaned forward to press his lips against yours.

The dizzy feeling from before came back, though this time you could say with absolute certainty it was because of the man standing in front of you. His lips were so soft against yours, yet still carried such a force they left you breathless. Fireworks had nothing on how he made you feel. No words could ever hope to describe the love and adoration bursting in your chest.

This time, he was the one to pull back first. He moved his lips up slightly, pressing a kiss to your nose and your forehead before leaning his head against yours. “Would you like to dance?”

You nodded and the two of you began to slow dance in the fountain. You don’t know how long you were in the fountain dancing; it felt like eternity paused to give you and your love all the time the universe had to give so you could enjoy this moment a little longer. The only sensations tying you to reality were Bucky’s warmth and the cool water moving at your feet as Bucky spun you around. You pulled away slightly and smiled at him. “We should make a wish,” you said.

Bucky looked at you with confusion. “A wish?”

You nodded, a small smile filling your face, “You know, toss some coins into the fountain and make a wish as we do.”

The laugh that left his lips made your heart flutter. “I don’t think this is a wishing-well. Although -” he paused to laugh again, “-I hardly think they meant for anyone to dance around in it either, so why not.” One of his hands left yours and reached into his pocket, looking for his wallet. He opened it and pulled out two pennies and handed one to you. “It looks like we only get one wish each tonight, so we’d better make it a good one.”

You stared down at the penny in your hand, wondering what wish could possibly be better than the night you were currently having with Bucky. The wish hit you suddenly, a smile breaking out on your face. You pressed your lips to the penny and wished with all your might, ‘I wish for us to have more moments like this together, from now through the rest of our days”. You opened your eyes and tossed the penny outward. Bucky’s coin was soon nestled safely at the bottom of the fountain with yours.

“What did you wish for?” he asked, pulling you back into his arms to continue dancing.

“I can’t tell you or it won’t come true,” you teased, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek as he spun you. “And let me tell you, I really want this wish to come true.”

Bucky chuckled, “Me too honey, me too.”

Your eyes came back into focus and a quiet sob left you. You stood in front of the fountain and cried into your hands, cursing all of the emotions you felt. That night had left you convinced that Bucky Barnes was the one. You had fallen asleep dreaming of dancing like that with him at your wedding. But now? Now all you wanted to do was scream. You wanted to scream at him, at yourself, and at the universe for being cruel enough to lead you back to this fountain without him at your side.

As the tears began to slow, a new kind of weight settled in your chest. He really could have been the one. He could have been everything you dreamed of and more, but there was nothing you could do to go back in time to change things. He decided to walk out that door and leave you with nothing more than an empty space in your heart, one to match the empty spaces he left in your apartment.

The questions the therapist had asked you started ringing through your ears as you continued to stare blankly at the fountain. What about the ‘after’? Maybe she had a point bringing it up today. You were still stuck in the ‘before’. Maybe it was finally time to start moving on. Missing items could be replaced; missing love could be given by someone else. All you had to do was make the decision to take your first steps into the ‘after’.

Your feet remained glued in place as you tried to make sense of it all.

You were confused as to where you were. Looking around, nothing seemed familiar. It wasn’t until a familiar silhouette caught your attention that you realized where you were. Bucky stood at the top of the mountain, staring down at the canyon below. Green trees and bushes lined the ground and the air was filled with the sound of birds chirping. The view was beautiful, but you couldn’t stop staring at Bucky. He looked the same, yet something felt different. Bucky seemed calmer than you had seen him in years, almost as if all of his stress had faded away. His body language was relaxed and he seemed to be in no rush to leave where he was.

Suddenly, the once green mountain top was now covered in a blanket of snow. Bucky was now wearing a thick winter coat and was strapping his feet onto a snowboard. He soon had his helmet and goggles on and began his descent down the mountain. It felt like you were flying along with him as you watched him expertly weave his way through the trees. The ease at which he moved confused you. Since when did Bucky know how to snowboard? He expressed wanting to try but never had while you were together. Confusion clouded your mind until Bucky reached the bottom of the mountain and came to a halt. He removed his helmet and a look of pure exhilaration filled his face. His excitement made your heart burst. As you reached out to try and touch him, the scene changed once again.

This time you were in the middle of the ocean. The vast expanse of blue was the only visible thing in sight other than Bucky. He was in full scuba gear, just floating there waiting. He was so still that if it weren't for the stream of bubbles that came with each exhale, you wouldn’t have been able to tell if he was breathing. Out of nowhere, a shape appeared in the distance. As it got closer, you felt your stomach drop. A large shark swam slowly towards Bucky. You rolled your eyes at the realization. Of course, he would go swimming with sharks with no safety cage. That idiot had no respect for your nerves or your -

You were woken up abruptly by the sound of your phone ringing. You groaned and cursed yourself for it somehow not being on silent. In your confused state, you reached out and slowly felt around on the top of your nightstand trying to find your phone. Once you found it, you tilted the screen so you could see who was calling. A beautiful picture of Natasha filled your screen and you sighed. Only Natasha could call randomly and happen to wake you up from a dream about Bucky. You pressed the answer button and begrudgingly brought the phone to your ear.

“Morning, you better have a good reason for waking me up,” you mumbled, letting out a yawn as you finished speaking.

“It’s past noon, you know. Most decent people are already up by now,” You could hear the smile in her voice as she spoke.

“Shut up. It’s still morning if I haven’t gotten out of bed yet. What do you want? I was having a nice dream.”

Your gruff response got a laugh from Natasha. “Well I was calling to see how your Tinder date went last night, but now I’m wondering if I should be asking what you were dreaming about that has you being this testy,” she teased.

You rubbed your eyes and groaned, “The dream was nothing special, I’m just mad you woke me up. The Tinder date was also nothing to write home about. The guy was awful. He started off super charming like they always do, but he got snappy with our waitress and then tried to get snappy with me when I called him out on it. I paid for my half of the bill and left as quickly as I could.”

“Ugh, gross. Men are actually the worst,” Natasha said. You hummed in agreement and she continued, “So are you ready for me to start setting you up, or are you going to keep giving these Tinder people a try?”

You sighed and paused for a moment to think. “Nat, I know you’re trying to help but the only people you have that you can set me up with are all SHIELD employees. I don’t see it ending well if I go down that path given my prior dating history.”

A scoff came through the phone. “He’s dating again too, so he has no right to be pissy about anything if that’s what you’re worried about. Besides, he was also the one who ended it so he doubly has no right to be upset.”

You sat up straight as she spoke, your stomach dropping at the thought. “He’s dating again?” Your voice sounded small, smaller than it had in ages.

This time it was Natasha’s turn to pause before responding. “Yes. He’s taken a few of the receptionists here out on coffee dates, but nothing seems to be sticking. If Wilson is to be believed, he’s also on Tinder. I can’t imagine that’s working out very well for him either though.”

You felt nauseous, but you forced yourself to pause to recenter your thoughts. Of course he would be dating again. It’s been almost a year since you broke up. If you’re dating again, it only makes sense that he is as well. He deserves to be happy too. A heavy sigh left you, “Well, I hope he’s having better luck than I am.”

***

You were on the phone with Natasha for another twenty minutes before she had to go. It felt nice catching up with her, and the two of you made plans for another lunch get together later in the week. The conversation had quickly transitioned away from dating, but the fact Bucky was dating again lingered in the back of your mind for the entirety of the call.

You had been on Tinder for a while now, but somehow it never occurred to you that he might be too. How does a superhero just casually join the worst dating app in existence? Do people actually believe it’s him when they come across his profile? You couldn’t help but snort at the thought. Conversations on dating apps sucked enough as it is, but having to try and prove you’re who you say you are the way Bucky must have to certainly would make it that much less enjoyable.

Almost as if it knew you were thinking about it, a Tinder notification popped up on your lock screen. You opened up the app and saw two new messages from someone you had matched with. You typed out a response and then proceeded to scroll through the list of other potential matches. Most of the profiles you looked at were immediate no’s, but there were a few you swiped right on. It never ceased to amaze you how bad the men on this app were at smiling in pictures. Most of them had only a slight grin in one or two pictures. Any profile with a man properly smiling almost always got a swipe right. The only other type of picture that had that sort of response was for cute cats and dogs.

You continued to swipe, pausing occasionally to respond to a message. Out of nowhere, a familiar pair of blue eyes started staring up at you, causing you to nearly drop your phone in surprise. Of course the day you find out Bucky is on Tinder is the day you come across his profile. You quickly took a screenshot before swiping left and exiting out of the app. You sent the screenshot to Natasha. She responded almost immediately, Guess Wilson was telling the truth 🙄

You laughed at her response as you got out of bed, ready to finally start your day.

***

A sigh of relief left you as you collapsed on your couch after spending most of the afternoon running errands. It hadn’t been anything too bad, but that didn’t stop you from being thankful it was over. You laid there for a few minutes, just enjoying the stillness and the comfort of being on your couch. Once settled, you reached over to the coffee table and grabbed the glass of wine you had poured, and opened up your phone.

You opened up Snapchat and responded to the few snaps you had from Natasha and other friends before opening up Instagram. You mindlessly watched people’s stories, skipping through any of the ones that didn’t interest you. You paused however on Bucky’s.

He was standing next to a beautiful woman, each of them holding a painting in one hand and a glass of wine in the other. Both of them had smiles that filled their faces. You stared at the picture, unsure of what you should be feeling. On one hand, it was nice seeing him so relaxed and happy. His posture reminded you eerily of how he looked in your dream. On the other hand, you couldn’t help but feel a touch of bitterness. You had practically begged him to go with you to a wine and paint night while you were together. He always used work as an excuse, either he was too tired from work or he had too much work left to do. You stared at the picture for a minute longer, wondering if they’d be going home together or parting ways for the night. You sighed, shaking your head at your own stupidity before continuing to scroll.

The wind blew violently around you as you struggled to make your way up the street. The weather turned unexpectedly as you were out on your run, so you rushed towards the closest coffee shop hoping to wait out the weather and avoid having to pay for a cab back home. The barista greeted you as you stepped inside and you offered her a smile.

“What can I get for you?” she asked.

You stared up at the menu, considering your options. “One large hazelnut latte and a cinnamon roll, please.”

She entered everything into the computer and you held out your card for her. Once your payment was processed, you turned to find a seat. The coffee shop was crowded, no doubt due to the bad weather driving people indoors. You looked around unsuccessfully and had almost resigned yourself to standing when a familiar voice called out.

You jumped at the sound. You turned around and made eye contact with Bucky Barnes for the first time since he walked out your front door. He was sitting there grinning ear to ear, almost as if he was genuinely happy to see you. The thought made your heart burst and it was impossible to hold back an equally big smile.

“Hey Bucky, how’s it going?”

“It’s going really well! Thanks for asking,” he paused and looked around before continuing, “Do you want to sit down? There’s not a lot of seating left and it’s just me here.” His hand gestured towards the empty seat across from him as he spoke.

You paused, unsure of if you should take it or continue to look elsewhere. You looked around the room for an empty seat but didn’t see any. Well, I guess we’re doing this. You stepped forward and mumbled out a thanks as you sat down.

“I’m kind of surprised to see you here if I’m honest. I didn’t think you came to this part of the city very often,” he said, taking a sip of his coffee. You couldn’t help but laugh.

“I generally don’t. The weather took a bit of a nasty turn while I was out on my run. I stepped in hoping that by the time I’m ready to leave it’ll have calmed down.”

Another smile broke out across his face as you spoke. “You’re running again? That’s awesome.” He sounded sincere as he spoke which made you smile back.

You nodded, but before you could respond the barista arrived with your coffee and cinnamon roll. You thanked her and took a long sip of your coffee, enjoying the warmth you felt as you did. An awkward silence filled the air as both of you tried to size the other up. You decided to break the silence.

“So, what’s new with you?”

***

An hour later, the two of you were still chatting away happily at the table. Once the conversation started, it didn’t stop. Everything felt like it had at the start of your relationship: easy, comfortable, and filled with excitement. The only pauses that occurred were when the barista refilled both of your coffees and brought Bucky a cinnamon roll, which he ordered after you spent five minutes going on about how incredible it was.

One of the things you had forgotten about being around Bucky was the warmth he exuded. Even on his worst days, he had the unwavering ability to make the room feel safe. You couldn’t ever quite pin down whether it had to do with his cologne being a comforting smell or if that’s just who he was. All you knew is that he always left you aching to lean into his chest and stay there until you absolutely couldn’t. Needless to say, today it left you feeling quite confused given everything that had happened between you.

The thoughts you had several months ago about getting closure were brought back to the forefront of your mind. How had things gotten so bad between you? How had both of you let this wonderful thing fall to pieces without even one final attempt at holding it together? Each little pause in the conversation as you transitioned between topics left you aching to ask all of the questions you had. Everything was so easy and so smooth between you today that you almost felt hope that things were salvageable between you. Maybe, just maybe, your fountain wish could still come true. As you were finally working up the courage to ask, his next sentence knocked all other thoughts out of your head.

“Did you hear that Steve and Sharon are finally engaged? Took that meathead long enough to ask.”

A gasp left your mouth, “No way! It’s about freaking time. Have they picked a date yet?”

He nodded. “First weekend in June. Sharon’s already picked their wedding colors too; sage green and rose gold. She explicitly said she picked rose gold because she wants to serve that rosé champagne you introduced her to. It’s still her favorite to this day.”

A bittersweet smile made its way onto your face as you thought about what he said. You had brought two bottles of that sparking rosé to a dinner Sharon hosted once, back when she and Steve were still circling around their feelings for each other. Sharon had barely taken her first sip before asking you for details on where you bought it. Ever since, Sharon always had a bottle in her fridge. Her friendship was the one you missed the most after the breakup. There had been a few half-hearted attempts from both of you to reach out, but each time her responses felt forced. Eventually you stopped trying.

“Well, I’m sure it’ll be a beautiful wedding. They deserve it,” you said. A chuckle left your lips as a new thought entered your head. “How on Earth is Steve going to choose between you and Sam for best man?”

Bucky joined in on your laughter, making your stomach do summersault after summersault. “Sam and I were actually wondering the same thing, but apparently they’ve decided to not do a bridal party. That makes things easy for me though. I get to kick back and enjoy the wedding knowing I have no responsibilities.”

The idea of Bucky having a blast at a wedding made you smile. The smile faded slightly as you realized this meant Bucky was now going to need a date for this wedding. Images of him in a fancy suit, twirling another woman around the way he had in the fountain with you flashed before your eyes. You felt your heart breaking all over again at the thought of how it could’ve been you if you hadn’t fucked it all up. How stupid could you have been thinking the two of you could talk things out after all this time. He’s probably already planning on asking that girl from the wine and paint night to go with him. She had appeared on his social media several times since that night and each time it made your chest ache a little more. Bucky’s voice broke you from your thoughts.

“Hey, you okay?”

You swallowed thickly and nodded. You tried smiling but felt yourself falter and knew he noticed it too. “Yeah, just caught up in my thoughts.” You needed to get out of here and fast. Conveniently, your phone screen lit up and you were able to fake gasp at the time. “Oh my god, look how late it is. I really should get going.”

Bucky stared at you, unsure of how to respond to the sudden change in the atmosphere. You stood and rushed to collect your things.

“It was really nice seeing you again Bucky,” you said, offering him a half-smile as you take your first steps away from the table. He nodded, still looking unconvinced.

“It really was. Maybe we could do this again sometime?” He asked, trying his hardest to keep too much optimism from creeping into his voice.

Your eyes went wide with surprise, but you slowly nodded. “Yeah, maybe.”

The same awkward silence from before filled the air, only this time neither of you seemed to know how to break it. You offered a small wave and made your way out the door, refusing to turn around and hug him despite how strongly your body was screaming at you to do so.

Bucky stood there staring after you until you were out of sight. A sigh left him after you rounded a corner and he began to collect his things.

***

Bucky had made his way back to the Avengers compound with relative ease, though his mind was still stuck back at the coffee shop with you. He had nearly choked on his coffee when he saw you walk in and hardly realized what he was doing when he called out to you. His mind had started screaming at him from the second he offered you a seat and apparently had yet to find a good enough reason to stop. Talking to you had been magical. He had forgotten how well the two of you meshed once a conversation was started. Nobody else had ever been able to keep up with his constant jumping between topics, not even Sam and Steve. You never made him feel bad for his quick transitions; you just understood and accepted that was the way his mind worked. Even after all that time, you took it all in stride.

An unexpected slam of a cabinet door caught his attention as he made his way through the communal kitchen. Sam was standing there, unloading dishes from the dishwasher. Bucky greeted the man with a gentle nod of the head as he pulled out one of the barstools to sit.

“That was a long coffee shop visit, you run into a cute girl there?” Sam teased, smirk playing across his face.

“I ran into her.”

Sam’s motions paused as he processed Bucky’s words. He looked up at his friend, who was conveniently not meeting his gaze, unsure of how to respond. “Her as in…?”

Bucky nodded and Sam let out a slow puff of air. “How are you feeling?” Sam asked cautiously.

It took a few minutes for Bucky to find the words. “You know Sammy, I actually don’t know. There are too many contradictory feelings in my head to pinpoint just one.” He finally looked up and met Sam’s eyes.

Sam motioned for him to continue.

“It was so nice to see her again and talk to her. It made me feel like things were back when we were both still head over heels in love with each other. She’s doing so well. She’s made huge progress mentally, she’s been given a promotion at work, she’s just out there living her life. It made me so happy to see...

“But the happier I got sitting there talking to her, the angrier I got with myself for being such an ass while I was with her. Who has a woman like that in their life and chooses to ignore her for work? What kind of jerk does that?” He paused for a moment, staring down at his feet before continuing.

“There was a moment where she looked at me and I looked at her and I just knew we were both wondering where the hell we went so wrong. She looked like she wanted to say something so badly, but decided against it and just...got up and left. I kinda deserved it though-” he let out a dark chuckle, “- it’s what I did to her after all.”

Sam had continued unloading the dishes as Bucky spoke, trying to keep things casual while he got everything off his chest. Once Sam knew Bucky was done, he paused and rested both hands on the counter to give his friend his full attention.

“Yeah, you were an ass who put work first. She was a great girl who loved you unconditionally. You let her down and yourself down too. But she also had her issues that contributed to what happened. It’s not all on you.” Sam shot a reassuring smile at Bucky.

Bucky nodded, knowing Sam was right. He couldn’t help but sigh and put his head in his hands though as more thoughts swirled around in his head. “I can’t help but think about how my actions probably worsened things for her though, you know? She was depressed for a while before I started acting that way, but I certainly didn’t help the situation. And just...I walked out on her. I walked out and didn’t even give her a proper goodbye.”

Sam stood still and nodded along. “You did, but what you’re forgetting is that you also did because it was also the best thing for you at the time. Both of you were unhappy with who the other was becoming at that time. Sometimes breaking up is the best route to take and they don’t always end with a clear-cut goodbye. You guys may have missed out on some closure, but if today went as well as you said it did, maybe you’ve got a different kind of closure coming down the pipe.”

Bucky’s eyebrows furrowed and he looked up at his friend. “What do you mean?”

Sam rolled his eyes and laughed softly, “Man, what did your dumb ass do with girls before I came along?” He continued laughing for a moment before resuming, “What I’m getting at is that if today went as well as you think before the awkward ending, what if there’s a possibility of reconciling? Even if it’s not in a romantic sense, you could always try and be friends.”

For a moment, Bucky’s heart surged. Maybe Sam was right, maybe things could be fixed. He knew things were going well before you got up to leave, maybe he could try and make things right.

Then, the memory of how uneasy and uncomfortable you looked at the end of the conversation replayed in his mind. He felt his throat tighten and tears well up in his eyes. You didn’t want him back. He had his chance today and he blew it.

He shook his head slowly and whispered, “I don’t think that’s going to happen, Sammy.”

***

Sam eventually let the topic drop and Bucky was free to make his way back to his rooms. A familiar meow rang out from across the room and was soon followed by the sound of excited footsteps rushing towards him. Alpine rubbed himself against Bucky’s legs, meowing expectantly. He chuckled and crouched down to rub Alpine’s ears.

“Hey there buddy, did you miss me?”

Alpine meowed, almost as if to say yes. Bucky smiled and picked up the cat before standing up. He made his way to his bedroom and let Alpine jump down onto the bed once they were close enough. His boots were kicked off haphazardly at the foot of the bed before he climbed into bed. Alpine came and curled up under one of his arms, purring slightly as he did. A sigh left him as he mindlessly pet the cat and adjusted his position until he was comfortable.

Bucky’s thoughts turned back to you almost immediately. His heart ached as he began to relive the night he knew he had fallen in love with you. How he wished he could go back in time and experience it all over again.

“So, Stark is holding a fundraiser in about three weeks. I was wondering if you’d like to come with me?” Bucky asked.

The smile on your face made his heart flutter. “Of course! What’s the dress code?” you asked. “I’m not sure if I have anything fancy enough to wear to a Stark gala.”

“It’s a 1920s theme. I’m not entirely sure what he means by that though, considering I was barely old enough to remember the first half of the decade.”

A teasing smile broke out across your face as he spoke. “So what you're telling me is the oldest man in the room somehow still isn’t old enough to remember the roaring twenties? Tsk tsk,” Your teasing tone made him laugh and lean over to kiss you.

“I’ll have you know young lady -” he paused to place kisses all over your face “- this is a completely unacceptable thing to say. Don’t you know you should respect your elders?” You continued to giggle as he continued to kiss you.

***

On the day of the gala, you were whisked away early in the day by Natasha. She claimed the whole day was needed to properly prepare, which left Bucky standing there rolling his eyes. But when you finally stepped out of the elevator into the lobby of the compound, Bucky felt his heart stop. You looked ethereal. The flapper style dress you were wearing fit you perfectly, your hair was elegantly framing your face, and your lips were painted the most perfect shade of red he had ever seen. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you the entire night.

By the end of the night, the champagne finally had gone to your head and you were desperate to leave. You grabbed his hand giggling, rushing as quickly as you could out of the reserved plaza. You stumbled a few times over the uneven cobblestones, so he kept a hand on your waist just in case.

“Bucky, I need to find somewhere to sit down. I need to take off my heels.” you giggled as you spoke, making his heart flutter for the millionth time that night. Without a word, he picked you up bridal style and slowly spun around as he searched for somewhere you could sit.

His eyes landed on a large fountain a short distance away and he began walking towards it. You settled comfortably into his arms, with one hand sneaking under his tux jacket and gripping gently onto his shirt just over his heart. Bucky wondered if you could tell it was about ready to beat out of his chest as he leaned slightly to set you down on the fountain’s edge. He had hardly sat down next to you before your heels were kicked off. It was amazing how much more relaxed you looked just from doing that.

He was so focused on how beautiful you looked he almost didn’t hear you giggle or realize what you were about to do. His jaw dropped slightly as you stood in front of him in the fountain, dress pulled up slightly as you waded in.

Bucky’s eyes never left you as you walked around, letting out the cutest laughs with each stream of water that you walked under. When you arrived back at where he was sitting and his whole world stopped as you bent forward to press your sweet lips against his. Your hands found their way to his hair as his made their way to your hips. With every ounce of his being, he wished his hands could make their home. They belonged there, allowing him to hold you so tightly against him it was almost impossible to tell where his body stopped and yours began.

It startled him when you pulled away suddenly, but the confusion didn’t last long as he was met with a handful of water and mischievous laughter. The splashing was relentless. You refused to stop despite him begging for you to quit it. He rushed to remove his shoes and socks so he could jump into the fountain with you. The excited squeal that left your mouth as you started rushing through the water trying to escape him made him grin. He was going to catch you and you knew it. That didn’t stop you from trying to delay the inevitable though. You tried to hide behind the fountain's centerpiece and to fake which direction you were going to run. When you decided to leave the safety of the centerpiece, he had you back in his arms facing him within seconds.

As he watched your face, the overwhelming urge to confess the extent of his feelings filled his chest. He loved you. He had known for weeks now, but staring at your beautiful face reaffirmed it so deeply in his soul that it felt like an integral part of who he was now. Bucky opened his mouth to speak, but the words failed him. Instead, he leaned forward and he channeled everything he had into a kiss. He wanted this to be the kind of kiss written about in fairytales; one that leaves audiences tearing up over and longing for. He hoped you felt everything he didn’t have the courage to say tonight and the small voice in his head hoped you felt the same.

He felt you smile into the kiss, making his heart swell. He pulled away gently after a moment, staying close enough to press kisses across your face. You had told him once how special you felt when he did it; now he couldn't stop doing it. He needed you to know how special you were to him, how loved you were in his arms. When he was satisfied, he rested his forehead against yours. An idea struck him and he smiled at you, “Would you like to dance?”

You nodded and he began to lead you in a slow dance throughout the fountain. He had never felt more grateful for the dancing experience he gained in his youth and that it was a skill he somehow kept throughout the years of brainwashing and torture. The feeling of your body against his calmed his mind and kept his focus from wandering back to the past. The only thing he wanted to think about right now was how beautiful you were and how lucky he was to have you.

After a few minutes of him leading you aimlessly around the fountain, you pulled away gently and looked up at him with a smile. “We should make a wish.”

His face twisted with confusion. “A wish?”

You smiled as you nodded at him, “You know, toss some coins into the fountain and make a wish as we do.”

Bucky laughed as he thought about how much like a fairytale this night was turning into. Apparently his kiss had done the trick. “I don’t think this is a wishing-well. Although -” he chuckled again, “-I hardly think they meant for anyone to dance around in it either, so why not.”

Reluctantly, he let go of your hand and fished around in his pocket until he found his wallet. He’d never felt more relieved to see pennies in his life as he pulled out the only two coins he had. He pressed one into your hand as he leaned in to kiss your forehead. “It looks like we only get one wish each tonight, so we’d better make it a good one.”

He watched as you stared down at the penny, wondering what wish you were going to make. Your face was serious as you thought but broke out into the most beautiful smile. You stood there, coin pressed to your lips, before tossing it out into the fountain. You stared up at him expectantly, waiting for him to make his wish.

He didn’t need to stop and think about his wish. He knew what his wish was from the day he met you. Following your motions, he pressed the penny to his lips and wished, ‘I wish for a life filled with more wonderful nights like this, with this beautiful woman in my arms’. He tossed the coin in and his hand found its way back into yours.

Without a word, he pulled you back in close to him and resumed leading you around the fountain. After a few moments of peaceful silence, he spoke.

“What did you wish for?”

“I can’t tell you or it won’t come true,” you said, voice teasing as you pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. “And let me tell you, I really want this wish to come true.”

“Me too honey, me too.”

As the memory faded, Bucky couldn’t help but let the tears that had been building fall. That night had been so wonderful. You deserve someone who could give you nothing but nights like that, not the heartache he put you through. He closed his eyes and whispered to no one but himself, “You could’ve been the one. You should’ve been the one...”

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel fanfiction

134 notes · View notes

amerrierworld · 3 years

Text

Babysitter (pt 8)

Thor (Ragnarok) - fanfiction

Pt 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

Characters: Hela x fem!reader, Tony, Nat, Thor

Word Count: 1,474

Warning: angst angst angst angst

You don't know how long you stood at your shattered window for. Your fingers were numb from gripping the windowsill and it had begun to rain.

A warm hand covered your own and pulled you gently away before you caught a cold. Natasha sat you down in the living room and Tony set to work on your window. Thor handed you a cup of tea, and you could taste a shot of something had been added, but you welcomed it warmly.

“Should be fixed in no time, Y/N,” Tony was the first to speak up. Natasha sat next to you on the couch, staying quiet. Thor was pacing back and forth, impatiently.

“We have to find her,” he growled.

“No, we don’t,” Nat retorted. “Wherever she is, it’ll be a waste of time tracking her down.”

“She may know something about Thanos!”

“I doubt that, big boy,” Tony sighed. “If she knew something about Thanos, you really think she would’ve waited here with Y/N until we all came looking for her? If I’d been her, I would’ve fled ages ago.”

“You don’t know my sister, Stark.”

“Well, clearly you don’t either.”

“If you knew what Hela was capable of-,”

“Please, be quiet,” you said, softly. The two men ceased their bickering and looked at you. Tony crossed his arms and sighed.

“Wanna tell us what happened?”

“I- I don’t know, okay? She.. we became close, that’s all. I liked her. I think she liked me too.”

“Y/N, she’s a merciless killing machine,” Thor spat. “She cannot be trusted!”

“She didn’t kill me, did she? She had plenty of chances, but never killed me. Nor did she ever run away even after she was free.”

“And why exactly did you free her?” Natasha asked.

“Because I trusted her. I trust her still. She didn’t hurt any of you, nor me. She’s just protecting herself.”

“And then she ran off and left you alone. Very trustworthy.”

“It’s not that simple!” You slammed the cup on the coffee table, angry tears streaming down your face now. “It’s not fair. You guys can’t just come in here and- and fuck everything up!”

Startled, the three looked at you, quiet for once.

“She- she was wonderful. Better than anyone I’d ever met! And then you fucked it up. And now I’m alone, again, because you guys refuse to ever talk to anyone!”

You were gasping for breath as you cried, and Nat hesitantly drew your into a hug. You slumped in her hold.

“Instead, you just come in here with weapons ablaze, and scare the shit out of both of us. I thought.. this time, I really thought...”

You blinked more prickly tears away.

“We’re sorry, Y/N. But it’s over now, and she’s not coming back,” Natasha said. “You think she’ll come back after what’s happened?”

“She wouldn’t just... leave. She has no where to go.”

“I doubt that,” Thor interrupted. “She has plenty of places around here she can fit right into. Maybe a goth band.”

Natasha threw a pillow at him.

“Y/N, come with us. Your place needs to get cleaned up. We’ll get you sorted out, and it’ll get better, okay?” Natasha cooed you quietly. “But you can’t think about her right now, nor can you trust her.”

“She killed thousands of people without a second thought, and almost killed me, too,” Thor said. “If it came down to it, she would kill you too.”

You felt numb. Part of you screamed outrage at what they were saying, but you felt like you had no other choice. You had no idea what was going to happen next, and now you were alone again, unsafe and vulnerable. At least the Avengers stuck around, right? Maybe Hela really was just waiting for a wait out.

You heart ached and you felt tears welling up again, but you quietly nodded. Natasha helped you pack a bag and Tony set the security locks for your place before you shut everything off and locked the door behind you.

Hela’s lungs were on fire from gasping for so long. Not because she was out of breath from running, but she was out of breath from crying. Cold tears stung her cheeks as she finally came to a halt somewhere deep in the city. Car horns and chatter sounded all around her.

She paced on a stretch of sidewalk for a few moments, trying to gather her thoughts, trying to keep your scream out of her head. The way you pleaded, cried out, struggled to help, was burned into her memory. It hurt more than all the memories of people she’d killed, all the blood she had spilled, and her heart broke over and over again.

Her eyes shifted to glance behind her every few moments, expecting a hammer-wielding God or a man in armour to come charging at her at any moment. The idea of being blamed for Thanos’ work or having to face him or the grief of your friends terrified her. Thanos was not something she could face, at least not in the state she was in now.

Her body ached from the sudden exercise and adrenaline coursing through her veins. She wanted to eat something, Hela decided. Not that she needed to, but she wanted to.

Snatching a hotdog off of a lonely vendor, the man shouted at her at first, but one glare shut him up. There was a kid with a hotdog staring at her as she devoured it, mustard dripping on his shirt that depicted a star surrounded by white and red rings.

“Are you an Avenger?” he asked, gawking. She looked at him, incredulous, wondering if you would’ve been mad if she killed this kid on the spot just out of spite. Instead, she raised her foot and nudged him until he stumbled and dropped his hotdog. Amid his sniffly cries, Hela grabbed another hotdog and marched away, fuming.

She could no longer feel the impending doom of the past few days, and she realized it really had been a sign of Thanos’ incoming attack. Her mind ached with worry, something she wasn’t used to. She was worried about you and your loved ones, and even the Avengers. Even her asshole of a brother who tried to kill her multiple times.

She’d become soft and caring, Hela realized. She snorted despicably at the sensation, but it ached with a need for comfort as well. Your comfort. She wanted to be back in your home, with cozy heating and food for days. But if it meant you being in danger, she’d have to hang out here in the slumps of the city, in secret, until she could figure out how to protect you and what to do next.

Hela passed an ice cream shop. She had learned what shops were here, how they worked, and what to do, but she con’t be arsed at the moment to follow any of the etiquette you had advised her on.

Stomping inside, she demanded the largest portion of green tea ice cream they had. Their diner TV was on, news of the ‘Blip’ keeping all their attention.

“Unusual flavour!” the worker at the cash register commented, clearly flustered by a customer acting normally for once. “Extra large then?”

“Give me the whole tub,” she ordered, eyeing the container that a co-worker was scooping ice cream out of.

“Sorry, ma’am, we can’t do that, you’ll have to order a size-,”

Hela lifted her leg and smashed the cash register, bills fluttering in the air. “Now.”

Trembling, they did as she asked, and she took the ice cream scoop that came with it as well. On the way out, she kicked the door hard enough that the glass in it shattered too.

You had once told her, humorously, how many people your age would binge-eat ice cream and other sweets when heart-broken. Now, Hela understood why.

She wasn’t worried about the Avengers fighting her. Clearly, they were more concerned with you and half their population disappearing than with tracking her down.

People took no notice of her, they seemed accustomed to people walking down their streets with horns coming from their heads and carrying a freezing cold tub of ice cream.

Hela walked far enough until she reached the supermarket you had taken her on her first trip out in New York. She bunkered down next to a homeless fellow sitting by the front door. He had a little cap on the ground with a few meagre coins tossed in it, and he was clearly startled by the angry goth woman coming to sit next to him, chomping ice cream.

She offered him some, he refused, and so she kept eating in silence, glued to the spot, despite the cold weather and stares.

And that was how Loki found her.

A/N: cliffhanger teehee !

taglist: @midnight-lestrange @cheerfullyvenomous @germansarechill @gaylorrds @amii-nyc @waitingfortheendtocome @novakitten0901 @marvels-writings (pls let me know if I’ve missed you or want to be added to the tag list!)

150 notes · View notes

luninosity · 3 years

Text

Okay, so, some Falcon and the Winter Soldier thoughts (will have some spoilers) for episodes two and three. General non-spoilery comment first: I feel like these were both *okay* episodes - neither as good as the first, but I didn’t dislike them, either. I’m still really curious to see how we’re going to wrap this all up in three more episodes; it doesn’t feel like we’re halfway done yet!

Okay, more spoiler-y notes below the Read More, not in any real order, just as I think and type. I’ll probably forget some things, but for now, here’re some thoughts...

--I like ep 3 slightly more than ep 2, mostly because of Zemo!

--I actually really love Zemo here (I liked him in Civil War, too): complex, sardonic, enjoying poking at people, a villain we do feel sympathy for even as he’s still sharp enough to remind us that he is a villain. Daniel Bruhl has always done a fantastic job flipping between calculated cruelty, wry humor - the whole “I am a Baron” moment was great - and pain that for him is still raw, about the loss of his family. (Some things’re awfully cliche - look, the supervillain’s playing chess and reading Machiavelli in his cell? really? - but, y’know...sure. Why not. We expect some cliches in the superhero genre, and this is an inoffensive one.)

--also Zemo dancing. That’s it. That’s everything.

--moving on from that: I’m also really liking how they’re writing John Walker. He does have charm, and there’s a certain amount of sympathy - especially as we see him worrying about filling the Captain America shoes, in ep 2 - but we’re also getting this really subtle sense of wrongness about him. He’s clearly vindictive and angry when things (and people) don’t act according to his mental script for them, and he’s willing to use his name and power to do things like get Bucky released...which in context and given our sympathies for Bucky is a good thing, but...it’s also an indicator of his willingness to do what he wants, because he can. (To be fair, Steve Rogers also often did that! - but Steve earned our trust, both in narrative and character. From his first introduction to WWII leadership experience to all the Avengers stuff, Steve consistently acts to protect people, and he’ll also listen if someone else has a good idea or if someone needs to talk, like with Wanda.) So I’m really liking this slow-fuse character development.

--mixed feelings about Sharon. I love that the show’s acknowledging how much she sacrificed for our main heroes, with no reward. On the other hand, she also clearly knew the consequences that could happen; she said as much at the time. The level of bitterness seems like a lot. But I’m also interested in everything we still don’t know about her - if she’s not the Power Broker herself, she’s obviously Up To Something. So that should be fun.

--hey, look at that X-Men location, with Majipoor! Also a nod to Wolverine’s favorite bar there, I think?

--I love heist and disguise plots!

--I also really like Bucky’s having to revert to the Winter Soldier - Sebastian Stan does it so brilliantly, with so many layers of emotion: not wanting to, loathing it, recognizing the necessity, shutting off all emotion and just coldly doing it, hurting but covering it up...just fantastic, and you know I love some hurt/comfort, and this seems like such a great set-up for emotional hurt

--but! this also seems like...a weird plot hole, kind of? Bucky’s pretty famous at this point, right? I imagine the criminal underworld knows he’s been pardoned and deprogrammed, right? or do they assume Zemo, with his knowledge of Hydra, still has some special control over him?

--along the same “this seems like someone didn’t think this through” path, Sam, you’re a professional, turn off your phone on a mission. Oh my god. Face-palmingly stupid - and I think somewhat lazy writing, as the writers plainly needed a giveaway, and went for the first idea they had. Even if it made a main character look incompetent.

--the Flag Smashers and Karli are...fine. They feel very Generic Marvel Villain - not the big space alien type, but the other type, the “I have a personal loss and motivating pain so I’m a little sympathetic but also Clearly Evil, watch me kill civilians so the audience won’t ever find me TOO sympathetic” type. Meh. Fine. Zemo’s more interesting, but...fine.

--Anthony Mackie is such a fantastic actor - every bit of his reaction to the Isaiah Bradley reveal is so good. The anger, pain, frustration, ferocity...heartbreaking. Actually that whole scene is so good - his emotions at discovering this secret history are palpable, and it’s so painful, because we also understand why Bucky would keep the secret - as someone who knows about pain and trauma and being experimented on, and knowing Isaiah wants to be left alone - we feel really deeply for both characters here, and it’s great.

--I actually liked the abrupt swing from the Isaiah Bradley encounter to the casual everyday racism of the cops on the street - is it subtle, no. But it’s not meant to be: it’s meant to be standing up and shouting about how not that much has really changed, and about how pervasive racism is. I know some reviews were all, “this was just too much!” or “too forced!” but...look, it needs to be shouted sometimes for people to hear.

--Bucky’s notebook being Steve’s, oh, ouch, my feelings. If I had the time and energy to write fic...

--(also, if I had the time and energy to write dark!fic: where’re my fics in which Zemo’s implication about the Winter Soldier “doing anything you want” gets played with? what or who does Bucky have to do to keep the undercover charade going? so many Bad Wrong Kinky power dynamics and explorations of consent and what this would do to Bucky’s head, here, and honestly I’d totally read them all, just saying.)

--Sam and Bucky together...I don’t know. This is one of the elements that I’m not actually a huge fan of, but I think it’s partly a personal genre / sense of humor thing that’s not clicking for me, personally, again. Like...

--I don’t find people shouting aggrievedly at each other to be funny? I’m not sure why it is.

--I mean, I get that they’re doing, like, eighties buddy cop movies, but...it got old really fast then, and it’s not something we needed to bring back. It’s not clever, and it’s...well, shouty and annoying.

--(I say this as someone who genuinely likes the first two Lethal Weapon movies...but the significant difference is, I think, we’re also shown in both those movies that Riggs and Murtaugh care about each other. They don’t want to be partners initially, and they don’t get along initially, and they do argue over tactics**...but they immediately feel responsible for each other and act to protect each other even as they argue, because it’s the right thing to do and we’re shown moments of them awkwardly trying to connect, because they both have that deep sense of...protectiveness...that makes them Good People - like, if they learn something that the other person needs to know, they tell each other. They protect each other’s families / love interests. So by the end of the second movie, with that fabulous character death fake-out, Murtaugh’s initial shock and grief is real and powerful and painful, and so is his genuine relief when the worst isn’t true - and it’s all earned.) (**however, they tend to argue tactics *before* jumping in - “is it 1, 2, 3, go on 3? or 3, then go?” And then once that’s established, they go ahead. That makes a difference as far as...well...competence and teamwork!)

--(Sam and Bucky, as far as I can tell, don’t do the above, and just...maybe shouldn’t be working together?)

--I also don’t find grown men acting like my youngest nephew, when he’s having a temper tantrum, to be funny. Staring contests? Random insults? Sulking in silence? Oh, grow up.

--(Also, yes, writers, we see you with the “couples therapy” and “get closer and make your legs touch” and “landing on top of each other as they hit the ground” moments. I, at least, personally, am very tired of...I don’t know that I’d call it queerbaiting exactly, but this idea that we’re supposed to find these moments funny...because why? Because, ooh, they’re two men getting close to each other, physically or emotionally? Why is this a thing we need to draw attention to? Do you think you’re doing some sort of fan service? Please either make Sam/Bucky happen or stop doing this.)

--both Sam and Bucky are highly competent and professional agents, or they should be. They should know how to work in the field - even with people they may not like - and adapt to shifting strategy, make best use of available assets, include people in the plan, etc. I can’t help but compare this to something like, say, Leverage, which also has a team who mocks each other and makes jokes but clearly absolutely respects each other’s capabilities, has a plan going in and tells everyone what the plan is, and adapts (and trusts each other to adapt) on the fly as necessary, and does it all without random insults about someone’s (PTSD-related) staring and “robot brain”.

--one of the very specific moments that bothers me a lot is the ending of the therapy scene (yay for showing heroes in therapy! but also I’m pretty sure she’s...not a great therapist?). Bucky finally opens up and says something real, about his own self-doubt and wondering whether Steve was wrong about him....and Sam just...brushes it off and goes, “we’re done here,” basically. Not only does that feel wildly out of character for former counselor Sam, it feels cruel. I really deeply dislike that moment the more I think about it. Makes me want to scream.

--Sam insults Bucky way more than the other way around. It’s starting to feel very one-sided (it’d be better if more clearly reciprocal, though it’s still not a dynamic that’s my favorite), and again, feels out of character - maybe this is Anthony Mackie’s sense of humor, but Sam isn’t Mackie, and Bucky isn’t Seb, and it reads as...a weird unbalanced power-trip thing to me. And also out of character for Sam, who can be sarcastic (”If you guys eat that sort of thing,” about breakfast, when Steve and Nat have randomly shown up at his door) but that’s not the same as just throwing unprovoked insults at a person who’s trying to recover from trauma, and a lot of those insults seem to center on things that were done to Bucky, that he had no choice in (the staring, the arm, etc), and that feels....it just feels mean, to me. Make fun of things he’s had a choice in / can do something about, if you have to - hair, clothes, liking “old people’s games” like gin rummy or pinochle, not knowing who Beyonce is, I don’t know, there are so many options that aren’t cruel! Do that instead. Let Bucky have a good comeback for once, too!

--the action scenes are action scenes. Also fine.

--Sam might be right about destroying the shield, and the show may even be (unintentionally?) setting that up as the best outcome, but that’s a problem for the future, Sam; get it back first. Also it’s a problem you caused by giving the shield up - did you really trust the government to leave it unused in a museum? You’re not that naive.

--overall, it’s...a perfectly fine show, so far, I think? Solid, and interesting, but not great. I think some of what doesn’t work for me is because it doesn’t work for me personally, as far as the shouty insult-heavy action “comedy” bits that I’m not enjoying, but I think they’re doing what they aimed for with it, so in that sense, I guess it’s working? There’s a lot of really cool stuff around the edges - John Walker, Isaiah Bradley, that Dora Milaje stinger, the bigger world of a history interwoven with racism and superpowers, the chillingly effective use of Bucky’s past - but I wish I liked the central Sam-Bucky relationship more. Individually they’re wonderful - they’ve both had such powerful scenes dealing with family, trauma, and consequences - but I feel like, in the effort to do the buddy comedy dynamic, the writing has just made me really sure that they actually genuinely don’t like each other? To such an extent that if they show any affection / caring / interest in each other in the last three episodes, it won’t be believable. (I mean Sam and Bucky, not Mackie and Seb. Mackie and Seb’re adorable.)

--I just want to think about Zemo dancing some more.

#the falcon and the winter soldier #tfatws spoilers #spoilers #fatws spoilers #thoughts

36 notes · View notes

idorkish · 3 years

Text

4 AM Cuddles Part 2

A/n: this is the second part. Again, , this is something I wrote back in 2016 on my original idorkish blog. I couldn't find it in the mess of posts from that, so I'm posting from scratch.

Part 1 Here

Tagged: @agustdowney

It had been a week since your departure from the Avengers’ Tower. You had told Natasha you were just going to visit some family for a while - which wasn’t a complete lie. That night you left, you had called Hank, and as predicted, he had offered you space at the mansion. You knew seeing your old team would be good for you. There were many times over the past years that you almost went back to them, but you knew you couldn't. You hadn’t wanted to use your powers anymore and no one in SHIELD knew, or at least they pretended not to know. Despite this, home was with the X-men and the students.

You knew you didn’t have much time left before having to return to the Avengers, it was your job. The past week was spent reconnecting with your friends. You spent time with Piotr - drawing and painting together and helping the students in his classes. Other moments were spent with the girls - Jean & Ororo- shopping and gossiping. You also helped around with chores and classes, as needed. Charles insisted you use the time to rest but you loved helping with the children and they seemed to like you back. Most nights you spent in the lab with Hank. It was the most comforting place for you and you felt as if you had never left this space. Despite being close to other X-Men, everyone knew you and Hank were each other’s favorites.

The past week had been filled with nothing but joy and happiness. A few people questioned your real motives for returning but you dismissed them immediately. Charles and Jean were sure to know your real reasons but both kept their old promises of never invading your mind to poke around. Jean knew that with time, you would open up and tell what happened. Otherwise, she was glad to have one of her best friends back.

You had at least another full week left before you would be forced to return. Knowing you would have to leave your family and friends again was hard and began to weigh on you. Late Thursday, you found your way to the roof of the mansion, your feet hanging over the sides. When younger, and still a student here, you would often find yourself up on the roof to get away from everyone. The quiet that came from being alone gave you time to think. You had taken off and immediately threw yourself into keeping yourself busy, that you never once gave yourself the time to think of what had happened and your next steps. Would you actually go back to the Avengers? You'd be forced to work with Tony and pretend that you never had an issue with him. You knew that if you went back, Natasha would figure everything out. The team wouldn't be the same. You could go back to being a normal agent, perhaps change office locations. But you loved being out in the field, fighting with the team was something you couldn't go back from.

Your other choice was to leave and stay at the Mansion. Charles would be more than willing to let you stay. You could work with the students in class or you could help Charles with admin things. Heck, you were sure Hank would be willing to make you his assistant if it meant you staying. The thought that disturbed you the most was that of running away from both and never returning. You knew you could leave in the middle of the night and they'd have a hard time finding you. Even with cerebro, it would take Charles time to find you and you'd be gone by the time they got there.

“Bad day?” A voice called out making you scream and jump.

You flailed about as you started to fall from the ledge back into the roof. The voice started laughing.

“You ass,” you sighed when you realized the voice belonged to your blue ball of fuzz. “Damnit Fuzz, why do you enjoy sneaking up on me?”

“Why do you insist on calling me Fuzz?”

“I asked first, Hank.”

Hank walked toward you and helped you to your get before pulling you close and placing his hands on your waist.

“Because, my dear, it is far too amusing and adorable to see you so lost in thought that you don't realize the amount of noise I do make to get your attention, yet you still get scared. So again, bad day?”

Resting your forehead on his chest, all you could do was sigh and shrug.

“Come on. You have to give me more than that.”

You pulled away from your best friend and ran your hands down your face.

“Just a lot to think about. I’ve made some bad choices lately and I’m not sure what to do anymore.”

Hank stepped toward you and wrapped his arms around your shoulders, pulling you back to his chest. Instinctively your arms wrapped around his waist and you snuggled against him. He looked down at the woman in his arms and sighed as he rubbed your back.

“I got an idea. What about an ice cream and movie night? Like we used to do. I’ll grab the ice cream and spoons, you pick the corniest movie you can find, then you can vent to your dear ol’ Fuzz.”

You let out a smile and nodded your head against his chest. “That sounds perfect. Meet in your room?”

“Meet you there in 20 ok?”

-------------------

-Back at the Tower-

Natasha flopped down on the couch next to Clint and sighed. It had been a week since she had last seen her best friend and despite the messages that she was ok, Natasha couldn’t help but worry.

“Ya know, if she says she’s ok, then you know she’s ok right?” Clint’s voice broke Natasha out of her thoughts and she nodded slowly.

“I know, but it doesn’t feel right. She’s never talked about her family to me and we talk about everything. She would have told me something before taking off in the middle of the night while we’re all away. Do you think she’s in some sort of trouble?”

It was not often that Natasha would show her worry. It was even rarer for Natasha to visibly be anxious. Clint sighed and grabbed her legs, pulling them onto his lap and massaging her calves slowly.

“Tasha, calm down. Y/n is ok. She has another week before she’s back here. And we’ll probably see her at the party this weekend.” Throwing her head back against the sofa’s cushions, she let out a groan.

“I forgot about that party! And we’ll be having ‘important people’, as Stark refers to them, there as well.” Clint let out a laugh and pushed her legs off his lap.

“It’ll be fine. I got to go, training and all.”

Natasha half-heartedly waved at Clint. Pulling her phone, she shot off some quick messages.

Tasha: y/n!!!! See you at the party right?! Miss you babe! :*

y/n: Tasha! <3 <3 Fingers crossed! Miss ya right back my baby spider!

Tasha: Even if you aren’t here, help me pick out something, k? Skype? Pics? HELP! <3

y/n: Send me pics and I’ll help. I’m 90% sure I’ll make it to the party. Pinky promise!

Tasha: Ugg, you’re killing me! I’m taking Wanda shopping tomorrow, we’ll send plenty of pics so be near your phone! OR ELSE

Y/n: lol I promise! I gotta get going. Need to help with dinner. LOVE YOU MI AMOR!

Natasha sighed and tossed her phone on the coffee table. She normally wouldn’t be this anxious but she knew something was off. Y/n would never keep things from her. Sighing, she shook her head. It would only be a few more days before the big party. She’d see Y/n there, for sure. Jumping to her feet, she made her way to the twins’ apartment area, “WANDA! We need to start planning for Saturday!”

------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- ------- -------

After an hour of binging on ice cream and corny 80s movies, you had finally vented to Hank about everything that happened, although you decided not to mention names. You knew that Hank wasn’t the biggest fan of Tony Stark, and you didn’t want him to look at you differently.

“So, you slept with a co-worker behind everyone’s back and behind his partner’s back? You know you’re my best friend, and I won’t judge you, but that was a mistake,” Hank pointed his spoon at you before grabbing another spoonful of ice cream.

“I know Fuzz! That’s why I broke it off! I couldn’t do it anymore and I didn’t want it to be awkward, but then it became awkward! I really thought I was in love with him ya know? Then I realized I was just being used and I pulled away from him. But then he started getting all weird,” pausing you shoveled a spoonful of ice cream into your mouth and sighed.

“...and? Cmon, I’ve let you go the whole week without me asking anything. You were pretty anxious on the phone when you called. I’m worried about you Boo.”

You smiled and chuckled at the nickname. You had called him Fuzz from day one of being friends, it was a name only you could call him. It wasn’t until you forced him to watch Monster’s Inc that he started calling you Boo. Scooting closer, you rested your head on Hank’s arm and sighed.

“Hank, I was falling in love with a man who was already taken. I convinced myself that he would leave her because he obviously wasn’t happy with her. I kept telling myself that it would all work out. It wasn’t until he proposed to her that it all came crumbling down, but he still kept coming to me,” you sniffled and wiped at your nose.

Hank shook his head and pulled you to sit between his legs and his arms wrapped around you. There were no words he could say to make your heart heal and it was in moments like these that he felt helpless. “Boo...Y/n, despite what happened. Maybe it’s for the best,” he took a moment to think of his next words carefully, unsure as to how you would react, “What if you just came back here? With me..Well with us. It wasn’t that bad was it? I-I-we all miss you!”

You sat between his legs, your head resting on his chest. You had sat like this so many times over the time of your friendship and it had been the most safe spot you could ever find. You moved your hand to his arm and slowly stroked at the blue fur.

“I’ve been thinking about that ya know. About staying. I was going to talk to Charles and see if I could just work at the school. I’m sure I could do the most good here. I wouldn’t need to use my powers as much here…” your voice drifted. You closed your eyes and felt Hank shift behind you. He moved you both so you were now laying on the bed, you laid on him and nuzzled your cheek to his chest as his arms wrapped around your waist.

“Y/n, we would all love you to come back home. Let’s be honest, Charles would let you do nothing all day if it meant you came back. But it has to be because you want to be here and not because you’re running from your problems. It didn’t work well last time, it won’t work well this time. You’re my best friend, and you should know I love you more than anybody else. So when you’re sure about what you want, I will support you.”

You wiped at the tears threatening to spill and nodded at his words. You knew what you had to do. Before you could come back to your family, you had to face your team. You couldn’t just abandon them.

“Hank, there’s a party at work coming up. WIll you go with me? Pretty please? With cherries and sprinkles on top?”

Hank gave a toothy grin and nodded, “Of course I will. We’ll make everyone jealous. I mean, cmon, Just look at me!”

You looked up at his smirking face and both of you started laughing.

“Let’s get some sleep, we’ll talk more in the morning,” Hank pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead and pulled you tightly against him. Giving him a nod, you relax in his arms. This was how you often found yourself falling asleep after missions. Being in his arms again was comforting, it was safe and felt like home.

“I love you Fuzz.”

“I love you too my little Boo.”

#4am cuddles #hank mccoy x reader #marvel imagine #xmen imagine #avengers imagine #tony stark x reader

70 notes · View notes

innocent-chris-evans-slut · 4 years

Text

Don’t Stop

My Masterlist ✨

Wanda Maximoff x Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count: 3.307 (I got carried away, sorry)

Type: Smut

Summary: Tony’s throwing the biggest party for his birthday. You and Wanda take the spotlight, but the Captain isn’t very happy about it.

Warning(s): oral sex (male receving), rough sex, hair pulling, dom!Steve, threesome, overstimulating, voyerurism

IF YOU’RE NOT COMFORTABLE WITH ANY OF THESE, DON’T READ!

For his birthday, Tony Stark had decided to throw one of the biggest parties you had ever been at. In only two days he transformed the living room of fourth floor of the Avengers Compound into the biggest party room on the planet.

You were the latest addition to the Avengers. You had a power that anybody had seen before, an ultrasonic scream that Tony Stark, as well as Bruce Banner, found fascinating -especially because you didn’t use any kind of technological device. No, your power was entirely natural. For this reason, you had been paired with Wanda. In the last few months you and Wanda had become great friends, given that you were almost the same age and that your life experiences -even if extreme- were almost the same. Also, you were the youngest Avengers at the compound and your friendship was becoming stronger each day passed.

“Tell me why do we have to attend the party”, you said as you sat down on the edge of your bed, soon followed by Wanda. You both laid down on the mattress and sigh at the idea of that evening. Undoubtedly there were members of the team that loved that kind of events, but you and Wanda weren’t among those.

“Because…” the red-haired one started, “…it is Tony’s birthday, who technically is our boss. And because the Captain will wear a suit and we love him wearing a suit”.

A particular common interest you had Steve Rogers. Since day one both of you made it clear to each other about the massive crush on the Captain and both accepted it. Being it only a dream, sometimes you found yourselves fantasizing about sharing a night with the soldier. “Imagine him wearing a light-blue-linen shirt put inside of pair of dark blue pair of pants. The ones in which his ass stands out”, while telling it, you found yourself shivering.

The same was happening to the Witch, who didn’t hide it, “Hopefully with his sleeves rolled-up on his arms”.

“I think we should have a cold shower”, you stated, getting up; you stretched out a hand to help your friend doing the same, “See you later?”

“For sure. I’m still not able to apply eyeliner alone.”

“Have you seen the twins?” Nat placed the flute she had between her hands on the table, then she took the seat next to Steve. She fixed the close-fitting black sheath dress on her uncovered knees and lowered its sleeves.

Twins was how everybody addressed to Wanda and you, considered your age and the quite special bond you shared. Yet, everybody learnt not to call the two of you like that when you were around.

“Not yet”, the soldier had a quick look around the room and confirmed his answer to his friend’s question. Once he went back staring at the golden liquid in his glass, on the table, he was suddenly hit on his chest by Natasha. He looked up and followed her gaze.

All the guests’ eyes laid on Wanda and you as both entered the room. For that particular event, the two friends decided wearing the same dress, but in two different colors. It was a knee-long sheath dress with no sleeves, yet high-necked; as you turned to reach the counter everybody became aware that behind, the dress, left the upper half of their backs uncovered.

“Good evening, girls”, Sam Wilson appeared behind your backs and asked for a drink at the bartender, “What are your plans? Kill everyone in this room?”

You shared a look with Wanda and both giggled, before turning to your friend, “Probably” your friend said.

“Or probably just one”, you added having a quick look around and lying your eyes over the Captain, now busy talking with a bunch of apparently-wealth men, behind them stood their wives and girlfriends.

Sam burst out laughing when he acknowledged what, or better who, the two of you were aiming for, “Good luck then”, and he left. Your best friend couldn’t help but search for Steve’s gaze once more. As a matter of fact, Wanda and you had never lost him for more than ten seconds; as if he was your target that night.

In fact, he was.

And he acknowledged your eyes on him as he walked across the room and sat down on the nearest couch he’d found. Legs slightly spread and head folded on his left side, an amused smirk coming up. If he was surprised by the twins’ outfits, he managed not to show it to anyone. That night he drew all women’s attention -married, engaged, in a relationship-, yet he acted like he hadn’t noticed it. Steve Rogers hated acknowledging it, but his attention was all on Wanda and you, who chose to wear the same dress, still in two colors. Steve refused to believe they chose blue and red because they were the only colors available, instead he thought you wore them for him.

His colors.

The Captain switched his eyes between Wanda and Y/N, who were dancing at the center of the dancefloor. For the couch he was sat on, he had a clear view of the two of you moving your hips and letting your hair free to be. He didn’t hold it back when two young boys came behind your backs and laid their hands on the girls’ waists.

Enough was enough.

“Girls, a word”, Steve didn’t wait for the two of you to agree with him, or simply consciously follow him, he grabbed your wrists and dragged you into his office -not far away from the place the party was going on. He pulled you in the room and forced you to sit down on two chairs, “What was that?”

Between the two, you were the most stubborn -you hated being scolded. Especially from the man you loved -the one you dreamt about at night, “We were just having fun. That’s what people do at parties”, you said trying to get up, but Steve put his hand on your shoulder and applied enough pressure to make you sit again.

“Enough parting for you two tonight.”

“What did I do?” Wanda spoke up, irritated by the Captain’s voice tone, “Can I-“

“No, we’re not going to ask to go back there”, you got up -this time making sure you were out of Steve’s look-, “C’mon”, you took Wanda’s hand and together you began approaching the door.

Little did you two know the Captain had locked the three of you inside the office, “Guess you can’t go anywhere without these”. Steve was leaning against the desk, shaking the keys in his hand.

“So, what? Are we staying here the whole night and wait for all the guests to be gone?”

“I have a better idea”, you said with her unique naughty smirk on, suddenly coming up with an idea. You approached Wanda and whispered to her ear your plan, knowing that she would be more than concordant with you.

Rogers couldn’t hear what the two were talking about but, by the look you two shared, he knew something was going to happen to him, “I’m not going to fight you”.

“Oh, we’re not”, your smirk never came off of your face, and slowly starts walking towards him.

The same did Wanda, next to you, “Not at all”.

Steve didn’t know what to do; he clearly didn’t know what was going on. Better, he had a vague idea, yet he refused to believe so, “Girls…” the soldier backed off until he hit the wall.

There was no way to escape.

“Not so bossy now, aren’t you?” your voice voice echoed in the empty room, with one last step you were now facing the blonde man, “Captain?”

He didn’t lose his control; he stood still and straight against the cold door. The closest the two girls got, the breathless he became. You were a few inches away from the Captain’s face when the smirk on your face disappeared and you turned to Wanda. And you kissed her. You literally made your lips crush against Wanda’s and cupped her head. At that sight Steve swallowed hard, not able to say anything to stop you two. He couldn’t. He wouldn’t. The built man stared at the girl’s lips on each other’s face; the Witch’s tongue in your mouth. He felt his pants and underwear getting tighter and tighter, his jaw and his fists clenching as he watched you two being so intimate and provocative. He just couldn’t take his eyes off of you.

“Girls, don’t play with fire”, the Captain warned you, closing his eyes and hoping you would have listened to him.

Yet, you and Wanda didn’t.

Instead, your friend broke the kiss and turned to the Super Soldier standing in front of them. She can’t say if he was shocked or excited -or both-, but she found the answer when she let her eyes wander on his body. “Looks like we’ve made the Captain hard”, she stated, switching her eyes between the bulge in his pants and you.

“I’m sure we can do something to make you feel better”, you slowly kneeled down and, with a rapid movement, unbuckled his belt and undid his pants, lowering them up to his ankles. You couldn’t help but look at him while her hand slipped into his underwear and grasped his already hard cock. She pulled it out and stared at it, her mouth watery, before licking the pre-cum on the tip. All of a sudden you felt a strong hand on your hair and looked up; Steve was holding your hair with one hand and Wanda’s with the other, his lips on the Witch’s.

“Suck it”, those words were capable of make you shiver.

You licked the entire length, while your hand gently massaged his balls; when the grip among your hair tightened, you smirked and eventually put your lips on Steve’s pulsating pinkish cock. You started slowly, letting your tongue wander on his evident veins; the pace gradually increased.

Steve liked it; or, at least, that’s what you could state, given the moans coming from his mouth -currently on Wanda’s neck. Again, he put his hand among your hair and buried his cock in you mouth. Entirely. You widened your eyes but managed to take it in and not throw up. His manners, the possession he was showing, it was anything he had shown before. Perhaps none of the Avengers knew that part of him.

That’s why Y/N and Wanda weren’t expect Steve to be like that under the sheets.

He suddenly removed his cock from your mouth and, with a tug in your hair, forced you to look up at him, “Want me to cum in your mouth? Or over that pretty face of yours?”

You and Wanda were completely shocked by his behavior. You exchanged an ashen look, yet Steve caught them, “Maybe I should just wait”. Having said that, the super soldier grabbed the both of them by their waists and lifted them up, effortlessly.

Both caught by surprise, both the girls let out a gasp when he opened the door and walked down the hall, careless if anyone was there; once in front of his bedroom, Steve kicked the door open.

“On the bed”, he ordered in a tone which didn’t allow any kind of reply. Neither a discord.

You were already more than wet, only waiting for him to let you reach your climax over and over again. Yet your plans weren’t Steve’s.

“Clothes off”, he gave another order and sat down on the armchair in front of the bed. His eyes fixed on his colleagues, kneeled on his bed and about to strip for him. As you unzipped Wanda’s dress, Steve felt his boner was becoming harder and harder. He brought his right hand down to his clothed crotch and softly rubbed it -not wanting to cum in his pants.

The Witch was wearing a see-through black underwear. You had a similar underwear on, though it was dark red.

“Kiss”, a smirk came up onto his face, while he unbuttoned his pants and let his hard cock spring free. Steve slowly stroked it, his eyes-full of lust- still on the two girls, as you cupped Wanda’s face and gently trapped the Witch’s lips into yours. Your tongues danced together; a stream of saliva dripped from both of your chins. “Wanda, unclasp Y/N’s bra”.

Without even opening her eyes, Wanda’s hands reached your back and her fingers quickly unfastened the opening of your bra, leaving your breasts free. Unconsciously your left hand reached the slip you were wearing, and your fingers slipped in.

In a matter of seconds Steve got up and approached the two, though he didn’t climb on the bed. He grabbed your arm and put it at the base of your back, “Have I told you to do it?”, as your answer was late, Steve said: “Answer me!”

“N-no.”

He tightened the grasp around your arm, “What was that?”

“No, Captain”, you soon corrected yourself, batting your eyes, “I’m sorry, Captain”, you added in a lustful tone.

The way you pronounced it, the way you were looking at him through you long eyelashes, did nothing but turn him on even more, “Since you’ve been a naughty girl, you’ll be watching”. He made Wanda stop and dragged you off the bed, then he forced you on the chair he was sat before and said: “Enjoy the show”. He went back to Wanda, he quickly made her face the sheets and tied her hands behind her back and gently caressed her ass, “Are you ready?”

The girl nodded without taking her eyes off of Steve’s face, even when he put the tip of his cock to her entrance, “So wet for me, aren’t you?”, he rubbed his index and middle fingers on her folds, her juices all over his fingers, “Here, taste yourself”.

As soon as Wanda had opened her mouth, Roger’s fingers slipped into it, leaving behind them a sweet trace. Tasting herself aroused her even more; somehow, she was becoming wetter and the knot in her stomach tightened.

She was about to cum.

And she wasn’t the only one; on the chair you clenched your tights, trying to ease the pain coming from your pulsating clit -horny because of what was going on not far away from you. Steve had buried Wanda’s face into the mattress, her ass in the air, and was about to make his way into her -but, before, he glanced over you with a smirk on his face.

Without a warning, the Captain thrusted himself into Wanda, making her scream against the sheets.

“We don’t want anybody to hear us, do we?” the girl under him nodded as she made her best not to scream while Steve increased his pace. It was an unhuman speed. Something Wanda had never experienced before. And it was breathtaking.

Steve grasped Wanda’s throat, pulling her up until her back hit his chest, he grabbed her chin and turned her towards you -clearly in pain on the chair. Your chest raised up and down and your breath was heavy; the Captain didn’t allow you to touch herself, but you soon discovered it wasn’t necessary. You were about to come only by seeing them having sex.

“Bring her closer.”

Wanda followed his order and used her mgaic to pull your chair closer to them. A second after you were looking at Steve quickly thrusting in and out from your best friend. Some drops of Wanda’s juices squirted over your face and you licked it, pleased with yourself.

“Look at our bad girl, wanting to taste you”, Steve noticed it and it did nothing but let his smirk grow over his face, “Wanda, do you want her to taste you?”

Wanda was on edge, really close to cum over the Captain’s cock, and it made it difficult to answer his question. She raised her head and looked over her shoulder to see the built man looking at her and you, ready to jump on the bed at Steve’s command.

He had two girls in the palm of his hand.

“Y-yes, Captain”, Wanda whispered, feeling the knot in her stomach tightening more and more. She felt the mattress caving in as her best friend put her knee onto it.

“Face here, baby girl”, he gestured you to lay down right under Wanda’s entrance, where he’s thrusting deep in her up to her climax. Steve roughly grabbed your hair and buried your face into Wanda’s folds, “How does it feel, sweetheart?”

“G-great”, Wanda was almost unable to speak, as her climax approached, and her moans filled the room. She closed her eyes and pressed her face onto the pillows, releasing her screams. The Witch felt her legs shaking, then a strong grip on both her tights; she lowered her gaze and saw her best friend, smiling at her and licking her completely opened folds. The view of her juices, mixed with Steve’s cum, dripping from another girl’s chin was enough for her to come again.

“Now, what should I do with you and your bouncing tits?” as he ended covering your face with his cum, he lowered himself, “I should punish you”, he giggled and stand up, stretching a hand for you to get up as well. He looked into your eyes, sparkling and full of lust, and he came up with the perfect punishment for his naughty girl. Steve tossed you on the bed and wide-opened your legs, a moment after his full length was inside you.

You were breathless and when you understood he wouldn’t move, you moaned: “Fuck”, desperately trying not to let out one of her screams, “Please…move”, you said, feeling his cock still almost in her stomach.

“Gladly”, he thrusted into you once, with all his force and your moans pleased him, “Sweetheart, come here”, he brushed Wanda’s cheek and grabbed her chin, putting her mouth down on your clit, “Lick”. He began pushing his cock deeper inside of you, amazed by the fact that you could take all of that. The only noises in the room were your suppressed moans and Steve’s balls roughly banging onto your ass.

The man of your dreams was fucking you, really hard and roughly, and you weren’t the only one. You would have lied if you said having a threesome didn’t turned you on even more. Watching your best friend bend over you, sucking on your clit and shamelessly staring at you, made you cum in less than four minutes -absolutely a record time for you.

“Don't stop.”

When you heard it, coming for Steve, you couldn’t help but let out your moans and struggle, trying to resist the overstimulation. You looked as Steve kept Wanda’s head on her clit, not allowing her to move. “Please…” it was nothing more than a whisper, but the other two clearly heard it, “Cap-“, you voice broke when you reached your second climax.

“What a champ”, Steve said chuckling and made Wanda lifted her head and his eyes soon found hers, “On your knees, sweetheart”. Then he grabbed you by her throat and pushed you down on the floor. Both of you looking at him as if you were puppies made his cock grow in his hand. “Don’t open your mouths”, having said that, he stroked his hard a cock and in a matter of seconds he cum all over your faces -on your mouths, your cheeks and your closed eyes. With his hands he spread his hot cum more and looked at you, pleased with himself.

“Dress up. We have twenty minutes before the cake is out”, he opened his bathroom’s door and turned to you, still kneeled, and found you licking his cum from each other’s face, “Good girls. Now clean yourselves up”.

Tag List (open):

@sinner-as-saint

#chris evans #chris evans imagine #elizabeth olsen #steve rogers #captain america #chris evans x y/n #chris evans x reader #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x wanda maximoff #elizabeth olsen x reader #smut #imagine #marvel #marvel smut #dark steve rogers #dark steve x reader #oneshots

433 notes · View notes

squishneedsahero · 3 years

Text

The Crash

Trust and Emotions

Part 1 of 2

Word Count: 3487

I'm on both a starwars and marvel kick so like.... Peter Parker x Reader

So... things weren't going very well. There were many reasons for this but the largest was probably the fact that you were in a malfunctioning escape pod, hurtling across space at close to light speed. How you were going so fast, you had not a single clue though.

Lower on your list of problems, but not much lower, was the fact that you had kind of sort of just run away from the clones. They were your friends, hell you'd practically grown up with them. The war was won and the next moment you and your master were being shot at by the clones you had thought to be friends.

The final of the big three problems on your list was the one that was causing you the most grief. Your master, the one person in the galaxy you were closest too, the closest thing you had to a parent was now dead. They had sacrificed themselves to shove you into this escape pod and make sure you got out alive.

Okay, maybe those weren't your biggest problems, though they were all related. Your biggest problem was that you had no idea how many rotations you'd been stuck in this pod with very little food and water, but even more limited air. It had to have been at least 7 rotations at this point, you'd spend a ton of time trying to fix the pod. More time sleeping and even more crying over your lost master.

You were probably going to die stuck here in this pod, which was an alright way to go you supposed but honestly it's probably more painful than being shot in the face by your friends. At this point most of the air was gone, leaving you fading in and out of sleep as you struggled to survive. Hopefully you'd be asleep when the air finally ran out but with your luck probably not. This was your plan, to die in your sleep as peacefully as possible, but as a Jedi since when did things go to plan?

The pod around you shuddered, a sensation you'd felt a million times, you were entering an atmosphere. The pod slowed significantly from how fast it had been traveling, causing you to slide off the seat and across the floor, into the opposite wall. You struggled to keep yourself awake, but ended up passing out again before you could hit the planet's surface. It was probably good that you did, so you wouldn't have to face your death as you crashed into the ground at terminal velocity.

Once again things don't go as planned. You wake up in what has to be a med bay, attached to machines beeping and making a million other various sounds. You're familiar with med bays, you had ended up in one many a time, you aren't worried until you try to sit up and find yourself strapped to the bed.

The restraints cause instant panic to swell up inside you. Where were you and why did they need to keep you there- In your panic you struggle to free yourself, trying to get a hand free to be able to get out without alerting anyone or anything thing.

"Ma'am," your thoughts are interrupted, not by a medical droid as you had thought but by a person, a tall man with an eyepatch. "I'm afraid you're going to have to stay there until you explain yourself and how you crashed on our planet."

You can only stare at him in shock. What did he mean explain yourself- you couldn't do that, you'd just be killed if they knew you were a Jedi- SHIT- your lightsaber where was it, in your panic you feel for your hip- nothing.

The man notices, "I assume you're looking for this," he holds up your lightsaber, "don't worry we'll give it back to you- we just need to know you aren't a threat first."

He was holding your lightsaber and had no idea what it was or who you are. This calmed your nerves some, but you still couldn't bring yourself to tell him everything, so you start with a name, "my name is y/n l/n. What's yours?" You ask, possibly using the force to get him to answer easier.

"Nicholas Fury, you can just call me Fury." He pauses before continuing, "so, y/n why are you here?"

You pause, staring at him confused, how dense was this guy- "I crashed here, wherever here is," you answer shortly, trying to keep your patience with his questioning. You needed to know where you were before you tried to get out of here.

"This is earth, in the case you really do not know. How is it you crashed here?"

"I..." you pause deciding how much of the truth to tell.

"I suggest you tell the truth. Things will go much smoother for all of us that way."

"I was in a malfunctioning escape pod. Couldn't control it. In fact I was about to die from lack of air when I entered earth's atmosphere." The man stares at you, judging what you had shared, then he just- leaves the room the door closing behind him and he doesn't even say goodbye.

Once again you felt anger racing through you and you forced yourself to relax. Strong emotions were not the way of the Jedi. You let your head flop back onto the pillow and you close your eyes. You didn't need to rush, you'd figure out how to get out eventually, you weren't in any immediate danger.

You must have fallen asleep yet again as you lay there because you jump awake at the sound of your door opening and people entering. "She says her name is y/n l/n, female, human and about 17 years old. As far as we can tell she is not a threat but feel it would be best if you all kept an eye on her while she finished recovering from her injuries received in the crash."

You sit your head up and look to the voices. It was that Fury man once again, but this time he had three other people with him, two men and one woman. That's when he turns back to face you, "ah, you're awake very good. This is Steve, Tony and Natasha, they will be keeping an eye on you while you recover along with some others."

You wanted to protest you were fine, but somehow you thought that would be fruitless so you just nod and look at the three. They were strong, probably hard to escape from, but you'd escaped worse. Granted those were all with the aid of your master, this time you were on your own. That was fine, you'd take your time with it unless there was any sign of real danger from them.

"Do I have to stay restrained on this bed or can I be let go?" At their suspicious looks you come up with an excuse, "I was nearly dead when I crashed, that was before the impact. I have no idea how long I've been here, but I'd like to stretch my legs before they disappear."

Fury looks at the three and they seem to shrug, though Steve nods, "she hasn't done anything for you to be suspicious of has she? I mean besides being an unknown who crashed on earth."

"Not yet," Fury says begrudgingly before moving over to loosen the restraints an let you up.

You ignore the hand offered in help, sliding off the bed and carefully steadying yourself. Your legs were weak, but you could manage to hold yourself up. You look once again at the adults, feeling as though you were surrounded by the Jedi council. "So, what were you talking about? With them watching me while I recover?"

"They have a large secure place you can stay as you finish recovering. You have yet to do anything to prove that you need to be kept in a cell, but you also have yet to prove you aren't a danger so you'll be watched," Fury explains.

You nod, you could live with that. "One thing- could I have," you pause, unsure what to call it, "the thing you showed me the last time you came in that you took from me?"

Fury nods, but hands your lightsaber over to Tony, "we've yet to figure out what this is but it's obviously important to her. You take a look at it, and you decide when she gets it back."

Later that rotation you arrive on the landing platform of a tall building. "This is Avengers tower," the one named Tony says, "you'll be staying in here with us until Fury decides otherwise."

"Alright," you purse your lips and shrug your shoulders. This was fine, the place was similar to many places in Coruscant, though this also seemed to be the high tech place on this planet. That was fine, it was similar enough to the temple that you were comfortable in the room that you were shown too.

"We will have dinner in an hour and you can meet the others then," you can only nod as the door closes behind you. How long an hour is and what dinner was eluded you but you would try and be there on time.

It seemed you finally had a moment to yourself so you found a comfortable spot on the floor to meditate. You get settled and begin to get in the zone when there is a knock on your door. "Come in," you call as you stand and go to open the door for the visitor.

To your surprise it's a young man close to your own age, "uh- hi," he offers a smile, "I'm Peter, Mr.Stark said you'd be staying here and that you were close to my age... so he thought I could help you adjust a bit since I'm his intern and am here a lot."

You look at him, quietly and using the force to poke and prod, figuring out that he had no ill intentions even if he had some sort of secret. "Very well," you say and move aside so he can enter your room.

He comes in and hesitates before taking a seat on the edge of your bed. "So, where are you from? All they told me was they you were from out of town."

You go and take a seat on the bed near him, deciding it would be harmless to answer his questions even if he's reporting back to Fury. You tell him the name of the planet you were born on and he tries to figure out where that is until you finally just have to explain that it's another planet all together.

"Wait- so you're an alien?! That's awesome! How's you get here? Are you like the Asgardians where you look human but have super strength and magical powers?"

You're bombarded with questions and you only answer some of them, "I suppose you could call me an alien." "What is an Asgardian?" And so forth.

Despite him asking most of the questions you're able to learn quite a bit from him. And even though you don't really trust anyone here you feel that Peter is the most trustworthy, freely offering you information in exchange for information. Your conversation is interrupted sooner than you'd like with a knock on the door and Steve sticking his head in to let you both know it's time for dinner.

Your brow furrowed in confusion for the millionth time but you get up and follow Steve and Peter to whatever this dinner was. It was food. And good food at that, not the normal military rations you'd get stuck with on missions or the simple food they served at the temple.

You take the seat next to Peter's and look at the other adults you hadn't met yet. They were all wary of you but that was fine. They introduce themselves, Thor, Clint, Bruce, Wanda and Vision. Six men, and three women including yourself.

This was everyone, Clint, Natasha, Steve and Thor posed the most obvious threat to you. Wanda seemed to just be a normal civilian who was here for some reason, as did Tony and Bruce. But Tony had to be a threat of some sort considering he was one of the three sent to get you. Bruce on the other hand if anything seemed scared of you and that was alright.

"Hey Mr.Stark, is y/n going to school while she stays with you guys?" Peter speaks up.

"No kid, y/n will just be staying here. I'm assuming that you've figured out that we don't know who she is or where she's from considering that Steve found you in her room just now," Tony says.

Peter's face reddens and he stutters for a response, "you're the- the one who told me to go talk to her!"

Clint joins in, "wow, Pete, you're already sneaking into her room? Tsk tsk I expected more of you."

Whatever the hell they're on about eludes you so you continue eating as they banter. "So- y/n," Natasha interrupts, "seeing as you don't have any clothes with you, Wanda, Vision and I will be taking you shopping tomorrow to get you something to wear other than that ill fitting SHIELD uniform they gave you."

You looked down realizing for the first time what it was you were wearing. All black just a long sleeve shirt and pants, it wasn't bad but it wasn't what you liked. "Okay," you respond, it would be nice to get a better look around this place called earth.

The next day goes smoothly, the three help you find clothes that will allow you to blend in, jeans and tshirts and shorts. They were all brightly colored, hardly any greys and nothing brown, and just a few black items. When you had spotted a robe in one of the stores and grabbed it they let you, saying something about Tony paying for it and if it'll help them get on your good side.

That light grey robe becomes your constant companion. They are surprised when you wear it absolutely everywhere and over any of your outfits, you had a strange sense of style but it was fine it wasn't like you left the tower.

When what they call a month passes you realize that you had only gotten closer to Peter, not any closer to escaping this place. But overall it wasn't bad, no clones had shown up to hunt you down and the others living there seemed to be the protectors of this planet, similar to the Jedi over the galaxy. So you were actually kind of content, despite being restless after exploring every inch of the tower with Peter.

Sure they had tons of books and other scripts to read, but you were used to always going never stopping. Now you were stuck, not even able to train thanks to Tony still holding your lightsaber hostage somewhere.

Other than that it was fine though, Peter had asked if you wanted to watch a movie with him, some form of entertainment. Seeing as you had nothing better to do you accepted. As he showed you how to make popcorn and got to the television room he was blabbering on and on about what was apparently his favorite movie series. It was something called Starwars and he was so excited to show it to you sure that you would love it.

A New Hope is the first that you start with and it held your attention from the moment it started. Peter doesn't think anything of your fixated silence, thinking you to just be enjoying the movie. At least until you stand up when something familiar comes on screen. "What is this?!" You demand almost angrily.

"What's what?" Peter asks, nearly terrified as you glowered at him.

"That!" You point once again at the screen, more specifically the lightsaber.

"It's a lightsaber-"

A million things rush through your mind and you grasp the sides of your head, "how do you know about lightsabers?! We are no where near Coruscant and only the Jedi can have them! How do you have record of them here- here on earth?"

Peter is flabbergasted by your outburst, normally quiet, almost stoic, here you were shouting at him over a movie. A movie you claimed to have never seen before and yet here you were knowing stuff about the prequels when he'd started you on Episode 4.

"I- I- I don't know what you're talking about y/n it's just a movie! I thought you hadn't seen them before?!"

It's at this long you relax enough to realize how scared he truly is and you calm yourself down. You look at him and he truly is clueless as to what you're on about. You take a breath and calm yourself before taking his hand, "we need to talk, somewhere private-"

He grabs onto that, you calming down and just talking it out with him, "follow me," he says taking you along by the hand to a closet, one of the few spaces in the tower without a camera. Once the two of you are in there you're standing nearly nose to nose and Peter's face reddens yet again at being close to you, why he did that you didn't know and right now you didn't care. "What are you talking about y/n?"

You take a breath, "those movies- how do you have them? All that information about the Jedi and the Sith- Tatooine and R2 droids-"

You could keep going but he cuts you off, "it's all made up y/n, a guy named George Lucas, he made up those stories they aren't real. He went and made some movies for fun, that's all those are, stories, made up stories."

You throw your hands up in the air, you'd gone backwards in your progress of not showing emotion since being here, "Peter- no, you don't understand- those things, they aren't made up." You pause and grab his shoulders, looking in his eyes, "I'm a Jedi- I'm a padawan. That's why I haven't told any of you anything about me. The clones killed my master while they saved me. They shoved me into an escape pod and launched it- it malfunctioned and I crashed here then I've been here ever sense. But somehow you know about the Jedi and lightsabers and think it's all made up-"

You finally let go of him and let yourself fall to the floor, grasping your head. This was madness. What in all the known systems is a movie and how is there one having all the secrets of the Jedi on a planet that doesn't know you even truly exist.

You're snapped out of it when Peter kneels in front of you and takes your hands so you stop pulling at your hair. "Okay, okay- we can figure this out y/n, we'll go and talk to Tony, figure out why you think all of this is real."

As soon as he mentions Tony you're crawling away from him, muttering, "no no no no no no no no," as you struggle to get the door open.

"Y/n, it's okay I promise, trust me- no one here wants to hurt you, let's figure this out together-" he tries to stop you in your panic. But nothing he says helps, it's only when he does something, something that shocks you out of it that you stop to listen to him.

His hands cup your cheeks and his lips crash against yours. You don't respond for a moment, until you pull away and look at him in shock. What was that? You think but no, you can't get distracted by strange earth customs.

You relax and close your eyes, when Peter tries to remove his hands from your cheeks you hold them there with your own. It's a minute before you open your eyes and look at Peter again, "okay... we can figure this out..." you say gently, "I just- not the others- not yet. I'm still not sure I can trust them... but you- I feel safe with you," you admit.

Peter's face reddens again but he nods, slowly removing his hands from your cheeks to wrap you in a hug. You can't help but lean into it, putting your arms around him in return, "we'll figure it out. Just us, no Tony, no one else, promise."

For as long as you don't let go of him he doesn't let go of you. But eventually you do move, you don't know what it is but there's something different about Peter, something different from any other life form you had met. The two of you move together, getting up from the floor of the storage closet, then go back to your room.

19 notes · View notes

notallthosewho-wanderarelost · 3 years

Text

Real quick scattering of thoughts on Loki 1x02 and x03 before I watch the newest episode. I watched them pretty much at the same time so it’s a two-for-one post. Here be spoilers for episode 3! On mobile so no cut again, sorry.

Spoilers ahead. You’ve been warned.

Okay. In no particular order but attempting to start with ep 2 first:

Loki trying to get info on the Timekeepers and the TVA in ep 2 and being blocked by the most bored archive librarian ever was hilarious. The whole sequence of him trying to get her attention only for her to completely ignore him until he rang the bell was creepy but so funny.

Loki’s reaction to getting the details on Ragnarok made me so sad. :( Same, Loki. SAME. I’m also still gutted Asgard was destroyed and I refuse to even watch the movie ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ But him going to look at that in the first place made me wonder if maybe in the back of his mind Loki’s coming up with a plan to save Asgard? (Or at least, one version of Asgard in the multiverse.) I would love that. I want Asgard back in general and was hoping for Thor 4, but having Loki be the one to save Asgard would be SO fitting. He may be adopted but he’s still an Asgardian at heart, truly. Having Loki be the one to save Asgard would be a great way to show him finally acknowledging that and have all the Asgardians acknowledge it too.

We have an official population for MCU Asgard! 9719 people. That fits. It’s about twice the size of a pretty small suburban town. Asgard is SMALL. It just doesn’t have the space for a lot of people. It’s still a city, but Asgard the Realm has other things on it besides just the city, so it can’t have a huge population.

I wonder what the official population of New Asgard is when we see it in Endgame? And how many Asgardians come back post-Blip? This would really all depend on how many people made it through Hela’s rule and onto the ship during Ragnarok- and then half of them would’ve been killed by Thanos in the beginning of Infinity War. Would half of the remainder have been Snapped away at the end of IW, or would Thanos leave them out since he already halved their population? File under questions Marvel will probably never answer. Also file under “Thanos continues to be really bad at math.” (Should probably go look at the New Asgard sign again to check, but I don’t think it listed population.)

Loki annoying Mobius by messing with his salad was great. Loki annoying Mobius in general was great.

Loki letting the goats free in Pompeii made me think he might have a liking for goats, which means I now have a headcanon that Loki was friends with Thor’s goats as a kid and would sometimes let them loose to get their assistance with pranks. Thank you show, for cute kid Loki headcanons.

Tom Hiddleston probably had a BLAST yelling at people in Latin in character as Loki, and good for him!

Sylvie’s entrance sequence at the beginning of the episode with the fight scene vs the TVA set to “I Need a Hero” was amazing. I haven’t seen Shrek in a while but this might just reach the same levels of A+ “I Need A Hero” song usage as the Shrek sequence.

Speaking of the beginning of the episode, the Ren Faire setting was SO good. Great way to get laughs, and it made me want to go to a Ren Faire again.

The Roxxcart setting for the big encounter later in the episode made me flash back on all the times Roxxon’s appeared in the MCU. Two main thoughts: 1. I so want a Jane!Thor movie where the main villain is Dario Agger, evil Roxxon CEO and Minotaur. Preferably working with a better version of Malekith (from another universe probably) like in comics, because as much as I love Thor 2 my one complaint is that their version of Malekith was SO LAME. Especially compared to comics!Malekith. Plus an Agger + Malekith teamup would mean both the Nine Realms AND Earth are in danger, by definition. Thor 5 please, Marvel. 2. I really, really miss Cloak and Dagger and that show deserved so much better.

(Our) Loki’s perpetual insistence that he’s better and that the plot (pun intended) is about him is both funny and also a little sad- because he knows, or at least thinks, that if he stops insisting those things, everyone will stop paying any attention to him whatsoever. And he needs attention.

Poor Mobius probably felt so betrayed at the end of this episode. :(

Onward to episode 3!

This was by far my favorite episode so far. I LOVE Sylvie. I love her and Loki’s dynamic. I love that we get Loki talking to someone he considers an equal about some very personal things, and that Sylvie does the same thing with him. They understand each other in a way nobody else has. Because they’re the same person, sort of. I’ve taken to calling them “alternate reality twins” and that’s what I’ll keep calling them unless told otherwise.

They also annoy each other in a way nobody else can. And it’s hilarious. They look equally annoyed at the other not falling for their tricks and equally annoyed at needing the other’s help before they really start to bond and I LOVE ALL OF IT. I also feel like they adopt each other a lot quicker than either would be willing to admit, and then they’re annoyed at that! Loki yelling “you’re so weird!” at Sylvie made me go “OH they’re bickering like siblings!!!” and that was pretty early on! I’m an only child but that had peak sibling energy to me. Even them trying to trick and outdo each other had sibling energy most of the time.

Their earlier fight when they first get to Lamentis, before they realize where they are, had some VERY quality quips and also really had me wondering who would win in a fight between the two of them. Sylvie seems to have more physical strength, and she’s got a sword instead of daggers so longer reach, but Loki has skill and he has tricks. I think with his skill at magic (he can TELEPORT?! Probably only a few feet and probably limited by where he can see but that’s SO COOL!!! I don’t think we knew he could do that?!) Loki would likely run rings around Sylvie IF there were no people around for her to enchant. And assuming that she wasn’t able to set any traps beforehand, because Sylvie has proven well able to set traps to take down people who should be at a major advantage against her. Otherwise, I think Sylvie would win. She seems to have better physical training than our Loki, and if there were any people around for her to enchant he’d have to contend with them too. And if Sylvie could lay traps ahead of time, then it could go either way (you never can tell with a Loki, much less two) but I think Loki would probably lose. Loki is just as tricky as she is but that seems to be something she’s had a lot of practice in. Loki is more about confusing opponents with illusions and duplicates and talking his way around people. Sylvie sets traps instead, and is more comfortable/better at using brute physical force.

Speaking of enchanting, me while watching episode 2: “Hey, these mind controlling powers remind me of Enchantress’ powers!”

Sylvie in episode 3: calls her powers “enchanting”

Me: “OH.”

So Sylvie seems to be a composite of 3 characters. 1. Lady Loki, as in Loki when identifying as female. (There’s also that time from before they said Loki was genderfluid and a shapeshifter and back when Loki was still evil when he possessed Sif’s body and went by Lady Loki, but we don’t talk about that.) 2. Amora the Enchantress, a major Thor character/villain who uses magic to “enchant” people into doing what she wants-yes this is definitely a cringey “magically enchants people into loving her, consent-issues-out-the-wazoo” evil seductress stereotype in old comics, but it’s gotten better recently. And 3. Sylvie Lushton, the much lesser-known second Enchantress, who was a regular teenage human girl when after a Ragnarok (don’t remember which one, there have been multiple but this would’ve been early 2000s) Loki for shits and giggles decided to make her think she was Amora and give her the powers to match. She was on the Dark Reign-era (aka when Norman Osborn was in charge of SHIELD and the Avengers) version of the Young Avengers, the Young Masters of Evil, and that’s where I know her from. She’s a great character- she genuinely wants to do good and help people, but her brain is a bit messed up by the number Loki did on it, so she gets confused. I believe she’s currently in comic book limbo after Amora found out about her a while back, got pissed at her for stealing her name and her whole Thing, and tossed her somewhere dangerous on the World Tree while saying something about how if she can survive it then she’ll prove she deserves the name Enchantress. She sadly hasn’t been seen since as far as I know.

So each of those characters have similar characteristics with Loki’s Sylvie. Sylvie 1. Is a Loki who is female (Lady Loki), 2. Was presumably raised on Asgard and uses her magic to “enchant” people via a form of mind control into doing what she wants (Amora the Enchantress), 3. Is named Sylvie (Sylvie Lushton, Encanhtress II). Also worth noting that both Amora and Sylvie Lushton have blond hair, and so does the MCU’s Sylvie. All three characters also have green colored magic!

May turn the above bullets into their own post just for informational purposes. Also, when we said we wanted Enchantress in the MCU, this is not what we meant. Stop with the Monkey’s Paw-style wish granting, Marvel! (Looking at you, X-Men comics’ response to us wanting more Wanda.)

Anyway. Will round off with my favorite thing: everything on the train. Everything on the train was WONDERFUL.

Loki telling Sylvie about Frigga and how she taught him magic and then demonstrating the fireworks made me tear up. 🥺 Right in the feels. I miss Frigga a lot. I miss Asgard/the old Thor franchise in general a lot, but this is about Frigga. She was AMAZING and I miss her. Forever love the detail that Tom and Rene came up with the idea on the set of Thor 1 that Frigga is the one who taught Loki magic and fighting and how that informed their characters’ dynamic to the point of it being canonically discussed later. There’s a great Thor 2 deleted scene where Frigga talks to Thor about this exact thing. Frigga is such a fave of mine.

Sylvie telling Loki about her own past in turn made me very curious what her life was like and what the differences are. She seemed to have had a really hard time of it as a kid and I just want to hug her. (I also want to hug Loki, but that isn’t news.) Loki has had a very tough time, but really only after finding out he was adopted. He doesn’t appear to have had many friends on Asgard before (though I headcanon that he was friends with Lorelai before her exile, and since it’s my headcanon I imagine a similar situation with Amora, if not quite as close a friendship because comics Loki gets along better with Lorelai than her sister) but he at least had a family who loved him and who he loved, and a status as a prince that would’ve given him a good life and protection. Sylvie doesn’t seem to have had any of that as a kid. :(

“Surely there were some would-be princesses? Or perhaps a prince?” CANONICALLY BISEXUAL LOKI YES! YES.

Comics Loki is canonically both bisexual and genderfluid! Explicitly discussed on page, multiple times, and expounded on by writers too. (One of the most heartwarming Odin moments for me- yes, Odin does have heartwarming moments!- is when he’s telling his kids he loves them and he says something to the effect of “my son, my daughter, my child who is both.” The latter is Loki, the former are Thor and Angela. I might still be bitter over MCU Hela taking Angela’s place in the family sorry not sorry. This was in Original Sin: Thor and Loki, for anyone wondering.) I tend to default to he/him pronouns when talking about Loki because Loki tends to be male more in appearances, and also partly because it’s what I’m used to, but when Loki is clearly female I’ll of course switch to she/her. I have seen people use they/them pronouns for Loki too. I don’t think Marvel has ever said what pronouns Loki prefers though.

Speaking of which: I realize the “Sex: fluid” on Loki’s info card in episode 1 was probably foreshadowing Sylvie, but I kind of want to also read it as a nod to Loki being genderfluid. (Loki is also a shapeshifter, so gender would = sex in this case.) Whether it would be a nod to specifically comics Loki or also to MCU Loki is anyone’s guess as of now. We’ll find out I guess, or if it turns out to be strictly headcanon than it’s whatever floats your boat. :)

Back to the train scene!! Sylvie loudly protesting that she can’t sleep near people she doesn’t trust and then promptly falling asleep across from Loki a few minutes later made me emotional. ALTERNATE REALITY TWINS. Also VERY much a parallel to Loki falling asleep across from Mobius last episode.

Loki realizing that Asgard was really his home and his family really was his family only to also realize that he’ll never see either again and deciding to handle this by getting ABSOLUTELY DRUNK is SO ASGARDIAN OF HIM. I cannot. He even did the “Another!” *smashes glass* thing just to bring the point home.

Oh gosh, LOKI SINGING IN ASGARDIAN. FEEEEEEELS. I know, it’s actually Norwegian. I wonder a bit why they didn’t use Icelandic instead? Anyway, this was lovely and I love that going by the translation it’s a song of longing to go home, and it mentions Idunn’s apples of immortality. Apparently the full version of the song is going to be on the soundtrack and I’m so excited for that.

Loki’s metaphor of “love is a dagger” was actually quite good, he and Sylvie just lost the thread of it right at the end there. I wrote about this in tags somewhere, I’ll copy it in here later.

Edit: here’s an edited version of what I wrote on this post: This was a great metaphor until it got away from him. So close to the point (heh) and then they veered right away. Let me finish this for them: “Love is a dagger. It’s a weapon for far away and up close. You can see yourself in it. It’s beautiful. You have to give it to the right person.” So what this scene tells us about Loki is that he’s been hurt by love because it hasn’t been real. Or hasn’t felt real to him. Maybe he’s given it to the wrong people, or maybe he couldn’t tell who the right people were. (And if this is in reference to his family then I think he’s still too close to the revelation of his identity to be able to think clearly about the situation. Because his family DID love him! Even Odin. He just lost sight of that with everything happening.) Love is also about trust. And Loki doesn’t trust easily.

I really love this quote and this scene. Kinda want to do a “Love is a dagger” graphic of i ever have time.

I also wouldn’t be surprised if Loki and Sylvie come back to this conversation and come to a more satisfying conclusion. I hope that happens actually.

Sylvie using her headpiece against an opponent in the train fight instantly made me think of Wonder Woman. A+. Also, I haven’t mentioned yet but I love the fact that Sylvie’s headpiece looks exactly like God(dess) of Stories Loki’s from Agent of Asgard. Loki’s Ragnarok headpiece definitely had big AoA Loki vibes, but Sylvie’s headpiece is much closer- mostly it’s smaller, which is very Agent of Asgard Loki in general, but the one horn being cut off is specifically a God(dess) of Stories Loki thing and I love that they pulled from that.

Loki throwing the dagger and missing because he’s drunk was hilarious. Not good for Sylvie, but hilarious to watch. Don’t fight while drunk, Loki. Also, he threw “love” at Sylvie and I laughed when I realized that.

I didn’t realize until I saw a parallel gifset of it why Loki carefully going up to Sylvie after her scream felt so familiar- it’s just like how he went up to Thor after Thor overturned the table in Thor 1. The CONTINUINTY!! Absolutely amazing.

While trying to save the Ark Loki was probably thinking a lot about what he saw in the TVA clips of his own people trying to escape Asgard during Ragnarok and that hits kind of hard.

Loki apparently using telekinesis to stop the column from falling on him and Sylvie threw me off a lot until I saw another gifset that included the moment in Thor 2 (trailers only, I think) when he finds out Frigga is dead and all the furniture close to him breaks and flies away from him. The pose was even the same as when he stopped the column. I think he can sort of... push things away from him? (Almost like a Force Push 🤔) He seems to need to stop and tense up his arms while he does it though. And it doesn’t have the green effect the rest of his magic does, which is odd.

Speaking of Loki’s powers, I’ve said this in tags for sure but I’m so happy they’re FINALLY letting Loki hit people with green magic bolts. He does tend to prefer more subtle uses of magic, but I still can’t believe it took over 4 movies for that to happen. It’s kind of a no-brainer magic attack- probably exactly why Loki prefers other things- but you’d think he would’ve done it at least once after 4 movies.

I saw a post point out that by the end of the episode, Sylvie has lost both her headpiece and her cloak/robe thing, which makes me wonder if she’s going to get a new outfit by the end of the show. Or at least different accessories. I’m also curious if she’s going to take up the Enchantress moniker by the end of the show.

Finishing this with theme analysis and theory time:

The revelation that TVA agents used to be variants and were somehow reprogrammed makes so much sense. There’s something immediately shifty about the idea of 3 Time Keepers dictating the fate of everyone in infinite multiverses, and this just solidifies the hint that the Time Keepers are going to be the overall Big Bads. Which makes sense, narratively! But this shifts the TVA agents from villains to victims. Mobius gets to stay sympathetic and so does Sylvie, AND once the TVA agents find out about their origins it puts the same choice onto them that Loki has. They all have a choice now about who they’re going to be. They’re not who they thought they were, but are they going to let themselves be defined by what other people (here, the Time Keepers) think they should be, or are they going to be who they want to be.

This is exactly what Loki: Agent of Asgard is about, by the way. And I know I said in the last post that Loki’s greatest villain is himself, but I’m going to amend that because I didn’t say it quite right. Loki’s greatest villain is his evil self. Loki the god of evil, the Loki that is the villain. Loki (and all the other Asgardians) in Agent of Asgard is genuinely a god, and AoA tells us that gods are defined by belief- they are what people believe them to be. That’s how they exist. So because so many people believe Loki is an evil villain, the universe tries to twist him to fit that role. The plot of AoA is Loki trying to avoid that fate, to be better, be who he wants to be. It’s a meta story. It’s Loki trying to break free of the narrative he’s been part of up until that point. And eventually he manages to break the fourth wall itself and take control of his own narrative by becoming the god of stories. He controls his own story and it no longer matters what other people think he is, only what he thinks of himself. Nobody else gets to change or define him.

AoA’s villain is a future version of Loki that does go back to being evil. He’s basically the cosmic force- destiny, the narrative itself, etc- that’s trying to fit Loki into the “evil” box personified. Loki is seemingly taking that idea and subbing in a different personification for that same idea of lack of choice: the Time Keepers. We know from the Miss Minutes short in episode 1 that the Time Keepers want one timeline. We don’t know if that’s actually to prevent a multiversal war like the short suggests or if that’s just propaganda. When Loki tries to find out more about the war or about the beginning or end of time in episode 2, he can’t access those documents. Something doesn’t seem right there.

Edit: Also, in episode 2 Loki compares the TVA to Asgard by saying both the TVA agents and Asgardians are equally stupid. The reveal of who the TVA agents are adds a new dimension to that comparison. They both see themselves as guardians of the world around them, special, but really they’re no more special than the people they’re fighting to protect. Or in other words, they’re only as “special” (“heroic,” really) as they make themselves.

Also an edit: damn I just realized the continued stupidity of R*gnarok having Fenris and Odin in the same movie and Odin dies but get killed by Fenris. Asgardians have a saying about watching for wolves’ teeth.

I’ve seen the theory around that Sylvie might be a former TVA agent (which seems to be backed up by the midseason trailer I very belatedly saw, oh my GOD TINY SYLVIE!!!!! But also oh no tiny Sylvie at the TVA :() and I really like that. It makes sense. Maybe she went rogue because she realized the TVA is preventing people from choosing for themselves. Maybe she even knows what it is the Time Keepers actually want. Or maybe she’s doing this just for herself because she didn’t enjoy being brainwashed by the TVA and she doesn’t like being told who to be! That is after all part of “what makes a Loki a Loki,” even if she doesn’t use that name anymore.

I’m also wondering (hoping?) if maybe her being a former TVA agent could explain why she’s a mashup of different characters, instead of it just being Marvel mashing characters together because they can. This is mostly wild speculation, but could the TVA possibly have put multiple people’s timelines/memories inside her head? What if she’s in universe an amalgamation of a Loki, an Amora, and/or a Sylvie?

We’ve had some clips of what looks like a Thor 1 era Loki in front of the throne on Asgard- which looks different to me; maybe Loki redecorated? We’ve also gotten a shot of Loki in front of a ruined NYC skyline, including Avengers Tower. Maybe we’ll get an episode where Loki wins and we’ll see different timelines where he wins in different ways, until he realizes that this isn’t actually what he wants?

Whoops this got long??? Thanks for reading if you read this far!

#long post #loki spoilers #loki 1x03 #loki 1x02 #loki series #meta #a rare text post appears #my stuff

5 notes · View notes

the-awkward-outlaw · 3 years

Text

Red Dead Cupid: Friends in Arms

Hello @katerix I’m your Red Dead cupid! I chose your request for Landon Ricketts x f!Reader being best friends, passing time\chilling together, when not busy maintaining an order around. I hope you like it! @rdr-secret-cupid

I also chose a bit of a different writing POV, just trying something a little different.

I lean back in my chair, the heat washing over me. It isn’t really much of a bother anymore, I’m long used to the unforgiving sun. It’s a requirement when you live down in Mexico. I take one last drag from my cigarette and then throw it down, pressing it out with my boot. On my left is the small table with my shot glass of whiskey, the chair on the other side empty but expectant for its usual occupant.

After a moment of watching a hawk lazily circle on the air currents, the chair creaks. I look over and see my most trusted companion and lifelong friend. Landon Ricketts. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking, and yes it is the famed Landon Ricketts, the fastest draw in the West and famed gunslinger.

He sighs heavily and drinks his shot of whiskey, grimacing at the burn. He looks worn out, but he always looks that way. After all, he hasn’t had a quiet life until recently, if you can really call his life now quiet. I do though, but that may be because I was with him a decent amount of the time he was living wild in the deserts of America.

“Them Gutierrez boys giving you trouble again?” I ask as he leans back, pulling out a cigarette.

“When aren’t they?” he says in his gruff voice.

“I’m surprised you’ve been as patient with them as you have been,” I comment.

“I’m tired of those days, y/n. And I’ve told you, I wanna give that nonsense up, try for something different. But, guess even in a different country, I can’t escape my past.”

I sigh, knowing what he means. As a teenager, Landon found me as a wild orphan, threatening anyone and challenging absolutely everyone to a gunfight. It was a dark time for me. I’d lost my family and through the anger that rose from my grief, I tried taking it out on everyone around me. Landon came through town, and how could I not challenge him? The most famous gunslinger.

I still remember the way he looked at me when I threatened him. He just laughed and turned his back to me, so I shot him. Or tried to. I was a real bad shot and my bullet whizzed right past him. But he turned back to me. Guess I made some kind of impression on him, because after that, he took me in. Taught me how to shoot and fight.

We ran together for a few years after that, became just as close as two gunslingers could. It wasn’t unusual for people back then to confuse him as my father, which sometimes we played along with if we were robbing someone. But the truth was it bothered me. Landon was never a father figure to me, but he was my friend. He was the only person who recognized my anger in my youth as a plea for help. I trusted him more than anyone.

In my late twenties, I ended up drifting off from Landon. Not on purpose, but he was always on the move. He had to be with his notoriety. At one point, I didn’t see him for so long I just sort of made my own way and fell into a gang of outlaws. Having a dirty history myself, I fit right in. The leader, Dutch, was a good man at first, but he ended up going crazy when the gang fell apart through a series of tragedies. By that point though, I’d already fallen in love and married his right hand man Arthur Morgan.

I loved Arthur, more than anything. He was one of the few members in that gang who knew my past with Landon, but he kept my secret. I didn’t tell anyone about Landon because I didn’t always appreciate his fame. Whenever anyone found out I ran with him, they’d bombard me with questions about him. It was always about him. Arthur understood, and he didn’t talk or ask about him much.

But then, Arthur died in 1899 of tuberculosis. His death crushed me. Dutch was so far gone in his madness that I just ended up leaving. Besides, the gang was finished by that point anyways, sometimes I’m amazed I didn’t end up getting killed in the process. I was so lost though when Arthur passed, I don’t remember much from after that period. I buried him and then I remember I stayed near his grave for a long time.

A couple of months passed after Arthur’s passing. I was still lost in my grief, living near his grave. One day, Landon showed up in the cabin I was living in. He said nothing but he threw down a newspaper at my feet. The top article was about my gang that fell apart.

“How did you know?” I asked.

“Because I know you,” Landon said. “I may not have been around much, but I know you. You think I didn’t know about your marriage to Arthur? When I read about him, I knew I needed to find you. I’m very sorry for your loss, y/n.”

Landon was the first person to comfort you about Arthur. I didn’t want to live like this anymore, in my solitude and kept company by nothing aside from my grief. Although I was still shattered, I considered going with Landon, but I told him I didn’t want to live the wild life of an outlaw anymore.

“I’ve done that already,” I said, “I don’t wanna do it anymore. It leads to nothing but pain.”

Landon agreed and said he wanted to do the same. He was also tired of the life, of any man who had even a sliver of confidence challenging him to a duel. He wanted to help people, to make some peace out of the violence he’d sewn.

So after that, I went with him down southwest. At first, we tried settling in places like Armadillo and Tumbleweed. But Landon’s fame followed him and he couldn’t escape the life he was trying to leave behind. That was when I decided that maybe it would be better to go down to Mexico. After all, everywhere I went reminded me of my husband. I just wanted to escape the memories, not because I regretted my marriage, but because I just wanted relief from my pain.

Landon agreed to the idea of Mexico, so a few years ago we settled down in the town of Chuparosa. It was a fairly wild town, overrun with gangs and troublemakers. It took some time, but we got it tamed. It was Landon’s idea to sort of make ourselves the equivalent of sheriffs, as the town lacked any real form of law. I half-heartedly agreed, even though being a peacekeeper was the opposite of what I used to do and the kind of person I used to run from.

But even down here, Landon was chased by his past. Sometimes a vigilante would come, having heard of Landon’s presence and would try to take him on. Luckily those types of men were few and far between. Every once in a while, one of the gangs we’d chased out would come back and try to cause trouble. But we were more than a match for them. The Gutierrez brothers were the last to not get the hint, until today.

Landon puts out his cigarette. Just as I’m about to say something, a young woman comes running up to him. I recognize her of course, Luisa Fortuna. A fiery member, and an enthusiastic member of the rebellion going on in Mexico. She’s breathing excitedly.

“Ricketts! The Guiterrez brothers. They’re back!”

Landon sighs and leans forward. He checks his pistol before reholstering it. “How long before I end up having to shoot these fools?” he says and stands up. I follow him, telling myself I can help if things get out of hand. Truth is though I just want to see these idiots get what they're owed. They’ve been a problem for too long and getting far too confident.

Just as we’re rounding the corner to the main street, I hear a familiar voice, taunting someone. That voice… it brings the dull pain I’ve sat on for ten years. I jog past Landon and find on the main street one of the Gutierrez brothers facing someone I haven’t seen since my gang fell apart. He’s grown older and he looks far more serious than I’ve ever seen him, but there’s no denying who he is: John Marston.

As Landon joins your side, John and the Gutierrez brother suddenly draw their weapons and shoot. John’s bullet finds its mark, but the other Gutierrez brothers pull out their guns to avenge their fallen brother. However they’re no match for John. Not that I’m surprised. He learned from some of the best gunslingers. I think the only person who had a better education in shooting is myself thanks to Landon.

When the last brother falls, Landon saunters forward as John holsters his gun. “I must admit, I’m impressed. Not many men would take on all the Gutierrez brothers and even fewer who could have taken them all down.”

“Who are you?” John asks, his eyes mean. It’s a bit strange, he always had a light in his eyes. Then again, I haven’t seen him since Arthur died after he sacrificed himself to the Pinkertons to save me and John. I guess it’s really no surprise that he’s changed too since then.

“Landon Ricketts. This is my town, I been trying to keep these boys under control, obviously not well. But now I’m curious. A fella like you who can take all of them down without hardly blinking an eye, I gotta ask. What you doin’ all the way down here?”

“I’m lookin’ for… some old friends of mine. One of ‘em came running down here and I think he’s met up with the other.”

This strikes me. He must be looking for me, but how did he hear I was down here? I walk out of the shadows of the building and look hard at him. John’s eyes widen.

“Y/n? What you doin’ down here?”

“Thought you said you was lookin’ for some old friends. I assumed you meant me.”

He shuffles his feet a bit. “No, I wasn’t. I didn’t even know you were down here.”

Landon turns to me. “You know this man?”

I nod. “Yes. He was my husband’s brother. I thought you were dead, John.”

Over the next few hours, the three of us sit at the saloon and talk. I tell John about my relationship to Landon and why I came down here with him after that whole mess with the gang. John then discloses his past, how he tried to come clean of his outlaw days. He and Abigail ran a ranch outside of Blackwater, but then the Pinkertons, in their determination to get Dutch, took his family hostage in order to get John to hunt down his former gang members.

When John tells me this, I feel a plummet in my stomach. I lean forward and look at him, daring him. “So these Pinkertons want you to kill your old gang members. That mean you’re gonna kill me?”

John looks at you, his brows furrowed. “I don’t know, y/n. I’m not sure the Pinkertons even know you’re down here. I assumed you died shortly after Arthur…”

Landon looks between the two of us but doesn’t interrupt. He knows I need to settle this myself. Landon has never been a man to fight my battles for me. It’s proven a frustration in the past, but at this moment, it’s appreciated.

“Then John, I don’t know how much I can be of help to you. I ain’t giving those bastards a reason to kill me. If they’re going after Javier and Bill just for their associations with Dutch, they’ll definitely want me dead too. I was married to Dutch’s right hand man, after all.”

Landon turns to me. “I think you’re making a mistake, y/n.”

I turn to refute him, but he cuts me off. “You’ve been wasting away with me these past ten years. I haven’t wanted to say it, but whatever happened with that gang broke you. I don’t know what this Arthur Morgan was like, but I’m guessing he didn’t give his life up for you and his brother to see you live like this.”

“He also hated revenge. Always said it was a fool’s game. I’m not killing Bill and Javier.”

“You don’t have to,” John says. “I’ll do the killing, but it would sure be helpful if I had you by my side.”

I sigh. Landon’s right, Arthur wouldn’t want me to let John go alone. Not after everything he gave up for us both to live. However I’m sure that the end of this journey will end in one way: my death. Perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad though. After all, Landon’s right. I’ve been wasting away in liquor and grief down here. I stopped living a long time ago.

I throw back my shot of tequila. “Alright, John. I’ll help you find Javier and Bill.”

I glance over at Landon and see he’s smiling. Now that I think about it, he’s never wanted this life for me. He used to say I had a fire that could not be doused. He must have known that this life, sitting in this hot, boring town and watching my life go on without me was never for me. That’s why he never searched for me while I was with the gang. I was doing what made me happy.

As I think about it, I realize now how much I’ve missed that life. Running wild and free. No it was never easy, but it was me. Living in this town as a sheriff is not what I want to do. I’m not cut out for it. I realize that John is giving me an opportunity to do what I’m meant to do. Sure, it won’t bring back the glory days from the gang, but it’s the next best thing. And if I die doing it, it’d be better than dying here, old and wishing I could have done things differently.

Finally resolved, I stand up. “Okay, John. Let’s go find these bastards and get your family back.”

#rdr secret cupid 2021 #red dead fanfic #landon ricketts #rdr fanfic #i'm awkward

15 notes · View notes