#the opposite of loneliness

[twicedailyquotes]

We don't have a word for the opposite of loneliness, but if we did, I could say that's what I want in life [...] It's not quite love and it's not quite community; it's just this feeling that there are people, an abundance of people, who are in this together. Who are on your team. When the check is paid and you stay at the table. When it's 4am and no one goes to bed. That night with the guitar. That night we can't remember. That time we did, we went, we saw, we laughed, we felt.

Marina Keegan

The Opposite of Loneliness

#quote #quotes #marina keegan #the opposite of loneliness #book quote

[books-in-media]

Emma Watson, (Twitter, February 08, 2015)

—The Opposite of Loneliness: Essays and Stories, Marina Keegan (2014)

#Emma Watson #the opposite of loneliness #The Opposite of Loneliness: Essays and Stories #Marina Keegan #books #celebrities

[ecoamerica]

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[aq2003]

ten

#i have series 4 on my computer now. but i have not started it. i am scared of it. #tenth doctor #dr who #ten is so he is soooooo. god. the doctor is so very defined by his loneliness. how he outlived everyone he cared abt #and what i love so much about nine is that you see him growing closer to rose. letting himself be happy #and post-timewar and losing all of his people (and blaming himself/being responsible for it?) that's so important for him to have #ten is like the opposite of this. he was created out of nine's love and sacrifice for rose. his personhood is basically defined by it #so you have his memories of losing his people in the timewar clashing with his inherent need to Be Next To Someone. #so losing people just breaks him. even after nine (ten? does timewar doctor count?) previous lifetimes of seeing death #when i saw ten's wiki blurb w him being described as one of the most human doctors. after watching christmas invasion i was like. 'what' #But Now I Know. they were talking about how he feels grief and pain so acutely. in a way a human might and not a 900y/o near immortal alien #10 era

[bumblingbabooshka]

[Tuvok & Janeway: Control, Distance, Duty & Connection.] Sources: St Voyager Transcripts / Mitski 'First Love Late Spring' / Disco Elysium

#web weaving #star trek web weaving #st voyager #Kathryn Janeway #Tuvok #be the change you want to see in the world - make a long post about Tuvok & Janeway's similarities <- angel on my shoulder #I feel like a lot of people see them as 'opposites attract' sort of friends where Janeway is unhinged & Tuvok reigns her in #but in reality I think that while there is that element in there (exacerbated HEAVILY by their delta quad circumstances) #what I see most in their relationship is how they both value loyalty and duty above all and are extremely rigid with themselves #and the people around them. How they both have to maintain distance from others bc of their positions as captain & vulcan #I hate when people dismiss Tuvok as not being remotely interested in Maryana or Noss - it erases an interesting struggle that he and Janewa #both share - their desire to stay loyal to their spouses vs the 70 years of loneliness that that loyalty demands of them #But they BOTH triumph and they BOTH remain loyal (Tuvok until he returns to T'Pel and Janeway until Mark informs her that it's over) #and for both of them it's a little bit insane for them to do that. #Isn't it more interesting that Janeway and Tuvok both have feelings for people other than their spouses but don't give in #to that temptation? #They're both people who live very fastidiously by codes. Either written codes or moral codes - they very rarely if ever do things because #it's what THEY want to do. I'd say they're the least emotion-driven members of the crew and yes I'm including Seven because Seven #has a very...how to describe? It's a blunt and insular selfishness. She does what SHE wants to do and doesn't really care about others. #To me that's emotion-driven. Or...personal desire-driven? Not a bad thing at all but very different from Janeway & Tuvok who #are always more 'this is logical' or 'this is for the crew' rarely do they think 'this is what I want' bc they can't afford to #for different reasons (captain & vulcan) #they both also are in the most 'caretaking' positions on the ship from my POV. Security and Captain - both are directly in charge of #ship and crew safety. #Janeway & Tuvok #star trek voyager #st voy #when I say caretaking I'm NOT saying they're everyone's mom and dad or whatever - I'm saying they're in positions where they always #have to think about the greater good and the crew as a whole and how much danger is acceptable etc etc. #Janeway is always killing herself for the crew but Tuvok is right there beside her

[h3llgurlie]

I always wonder how ppl with no prior dating experience “casually” date other ppl after turning 18, I literally can’t go on a date without fighting off a panic attack or overthinking into insanity. It fucking sucks.

#female loneliness #female hysteria #fear of intimacy #all encompassing loneliness #i need a hug #i need clinical help #female rage #autism #fear of abandonment #my tism wont let me interact normally with the opposite sex #fear of commitment

[anthropoetics]

hello! i was wondering if you know any books/essays on fear of intimacy (both physical and emotional). i know this is so specific but i get the feeling you might have some good recs! i hope you had a lovely birthday :))

hello, thank you for seeing me in this light, i'm definitely not suited to give you many recommendations, as i realized that's not something i generally read about, but! these are a few things i've read that might go along the lines of intimacy; (and thank you so much 🥺💌)

lockdown and physical intimacy among friends

on the intimacy of the mundane

loneliness: coping with the gap where friends used to be

ask polly: i want people to know the real me but it just won't come out

tell the people you love that you love them

i really recommend wong kar wai's the hand, which is both the fear of emotional and physical intimacy. and aloners where the protagonist has a very avoidant type of personality.

#if anyone has any recommendation. please!!! #some of them are the opposite of being afraid of it gkjhlg #and some of them are more related to loneliness #but i guess it can hold hands with the fear of intimacy sometimes #replies

[yuridovewing]

I'm making the RiverClan Trio (Minnowtail, Rippletail, and Beetlewhisker) antagonist-adjacent in my AU, for petty stuff in Po3 and for actual horrors in OotS, and while talking to Vio I got the cursed idea that they're like those anti rivals you see in kids superhero shows that parallel the protags in power and personality and maybe appearance (think the Rowdyruff Boys from PPG) and now I wanna lean into that. Make Po3 basically just an episodic superhero kids show parody. Go all out with it's ridiculous premise

#and its kinda shallow on the surface parallels at first that get further fleshed out in oots as the kids become adults #like. beetlepaw and lionpaw are the brawn. the tough guys. ripplepaw and jaypaw are the sarcastic mean guys #hollypaw and minnowpaw are the smart and calculated Girls. actually wanna make minnowpaw a mean girl #mousewhisker and his evil supervillain riverclan gf (hes just a guy) #and in oots again its more fleshed out. like hollyleaf is vigilant about the code and has a mental breakdown over it #while minnowtail thinks shes above all of the rules and starclan itself so her being halfclan doesnt matter to her #but she does go through a redemption as her family is picked off. by the end of oots its just her and her mom icewing. :( #idk what she'll do past that yet but she and hollyleaf end up in opposite spots where hollyleaf left a hole in her family #while minnow got better but was the last one standing. she has nothing now #except her mom but she cant understand her loneliness. #razorverse

[daily-hanamura]

#persona 4 golden #p4g #hanamura yosuke #yosuke hanamura #i think a lot about the depth of yosuke's loneliness - away from th distractions of the city and losing even the superficial r/s that he ha #of course he would hate inaba #the moment he arrived in the town he was treated as an enemy for reasons he couldn't control #junes did destroy local businesses and the townspeople's fear of big chain capitalism is justified #BUT their treatment of him was not. i wanna say that the people in inaba were awful but actually theyre just... people. #they couldnt fight Junes or engender systemic change so they take it out on him instead and ostracize him with names and tacks in his shoes #and to add to that all of his already existing self doubt and identity issues #and the problems of growing up as a teenage boy in the early 2010s figuring out his place in society #i think yosuke is very similar to kanji in that both of them have that same struggle of their self being misaligned with social expectation #so they play up this exaggerated caricature or image based on who they think they are supposed to be #in kanji's case it's an image that lets him control his rejection - he looks like a scary gang member so ofc no one wants to be near him #in yosuke's case he goes in the opposite direction of desperately wanting to fit the mould or image of a typical teenage boy #except there isnt such a thing as an “average” teenage boy so hes just such a mess sometimes #but masking so that hes accepted by others as just a teenage boy and not the prince of junes or anything? yeah. #haha my heart #he's good with his queue

[jewishdainix]

Im going to a sci-fi fantasy con tommorow!

#and im so excited bevause. i saw that theres gonna be a panel about the cosmere #and im probably not going to get a ticket for it since there arnet many left but it + other stuff from there made me realise that its going #to be a place for my kind of people. my community both in queerness and interests together #im going to meet people like me irl in an event for people like me irl #and it is making me very emotional in a good way #because like. so much of my life has been defined by loneliness. by sometimes meeting the odd person that understands but always having to #test the waters before opening my inner world or talking about queerness #thisll be the opposite. in this ill get to assume people want to excitedly talk about nerdy stuff #in this i wont have to be afraid or test the waters befor etalking aboht queerness

[heliianth]

im so fucking emo abt totk zelink i havent even gotten to the sad place in the story and i have no idea what the cutscene is like but sometimes i think abt what it might be and i want to. collapse like a dying star

#it was already really easy to project my loneliness onto link in botw what the everliving fuck do you mean they made it easier in totk #like logically the media analyst in me knows that the message and resolution are the exact opposite of that #that totk has far more community and togetherness than botw which was mainly about mourning and moving on #but like. ok. this zelink makes me insane in ways i cannot describe #i truly feel deranged abt them IMAGINE BEING IN HIS SHOESSS do u think he thinks he failed again #that hes supposed to be the chosen one and hes never enough when it counts. all zelda does is end up waiting for him to catch up #KILLS BITES BITES BITES TEARS MAIMS KILLS #heliichats

[orchideae]

I have so very much to catch up on, my sincerest apologies, seriously— there's been mental madness going on behind the scenes, including this weekend. Please, let December be the month where normality starts and stays.

And on a more IC note, I often talk about solitude and isolation (and its origins in a very specific kind of loneliness) that is chosen and accepted, but I don't know if I ever talk about what that looks like exactly, and why, quite frankly, it's a little... for lack of a better word, concerning. Do me a favor, if you're in Genshin, turn your clock to nighttime, then go out into any of the cities, villages, camps, footholds and look up, no matter the nation you're in. How many characters are able to do that, and see a night sky that is nothing but void of any and all bounds and limitations? How many of them see that endless array of stars that illuminate it, and how many feel the cool fresh air that tickles their skin? For many, they can leave the four walls that house them, and experience that sight and sensation, because all of us to an extent, crave that. And honestly, so can Yelan— but she also, if not more often so, chooses to see something else. And the unusual concept of choosing that, is a driving force to my decisions for her and why I deem them so incredibly important: it's about the state of mind, it's about the mental that drives her.

On many days and nights especially, this is what she sees, and this is only if she doesn't descend further into the Chasm (which we know that she does), closer to the Abyss and to the Celestial nail itself that rests at its heart. And yes, it is beautiful in its own way, a pathway illuminated by the light of the moon and the nail, but it's also a cruel reminder of just how far the surface, and humans that live there (that she is by all accounts a part of, of course), are. But then, when she returns her gaze to the ground, her surroundings are void of light and dare I say, void of hope. The Chasm isn't just one of the places where you can get the closest to the Abyss, but it also consists of ruins of more than just one civilization. We see glimpses of Khaenri'ah (which we explore more closely through Dain's quest), but we know there is 'fauna' down there, even deeper, that is referenced as belonging to an even more ancient civilization that predated it. The Chasm is surrounded by reminders of death, ruin, and in that, it feels as if it's the direct foil of the world above it. The Chasm was almost the end of Liyue five-hundred years ago during the fall of Khaenri'ah, just as it had, apparently, once been to a civilization before it (please remember, the impact of the meteorite/fallen star that created the Chasm occurred roughly 6000 years ago), and its creatures wouldn't have stopped at its borders. The Chasm is the engulfing darkness in direct opposition to the light of life overhead, and the hope that humanity holds in the palms of its hands. It's dark, it's grim, and it's cold in more ways than one (See one, two, three, four).

And this place is a choice that Yelan makes to venture to and stay in, yes, yet calling it a choice is where it gets so interesting. Once upon a time, long before she got her vision, she was part of a team that surveyed the surroundings of the Chasm, and like many others before them that have descended into it, all members of this team, excluding her, died. The circumstances aren't clear, but following Yelan's line to Ning, I'm lead to believe that the Chasm's surroundings, which are all rather clearly threats to non-vision holders in specific (which Yelan also was at the time), were directly responsible for their demise. I'll note my hypothesis on what could have happened to them in a different post in the future, as I don't want to go far off-topic, but despite having likely witnessed what occurred to them, seeing the ruins of the Chasm, the threat of the Abyss and barely understanding what the Abyss even is, she continues to venture down there because the possibility of what could happen to the people of Liyue, is more important than her own existence and/or survival. And this bears even more weight following the events of Perilous Trail part 2, where she witnessed just how much the Chasm is capable of. Is this walking engima of a woman also drawn to equal or greater mystery than herself, much like a moth to a flame? I think that's part of it, but I definitely think it's infinitely more multi-layered.

Mostly, I think that this plays into the heart of what Fontaine has shown us that 'hydro' seems to represent: it's not merely a sense of responsibility (and/or justice) or selflessness, but a semblance of self-sacrifice either during the duration of one's life or at its end, either literally or figuratively. But keeping that in mind, what I really want to shine a spotlight on, is what kind of self-sacrifice seems to be the case with Yelan, and the way in which she seems to not just be at peace with it, but has truly accepted it almost as something akin to normality. And more importantly, note how this isn't normal behavior. An acceptance of solitude in such depressing surroundings is incredibly saddening, because it's not something that we ever crave by any means or should ever come to crave. Any regular individual, even most vision-holders surely, would find what she does insane to some extent. And yet, she walks the depths of the Chasm, of all places, with a similar routine as a Millelith guard patrols the outskirts of the harbor. Regardless of her clear reason for it— god, I have difficulty explaining what I'm trying to say; how does someone get to a point where they no longer do something so depressing out of necessity, but because it's... normal? That's her. The Chasm isn't... as eerie to her as it is to others, even if she knows better than most what these surroundings are; the Chasm it isn't as dangerous, even if she knows that it is and it's why she's there in the first place, to her as it is to others. Perhaps it's simply an acceptance that regardless of its dangers, that her fate lies in those depths as it did for her ancestors, that the Chasm's ruins will include her own legacy one day. But again, how does one come to terms with that? How do you come to make the decision that you will sacrifice yourself for others, especially when it means resigning yourself to a place like the Chasm, a place that is home to a pathway to the Abyss, which inherently holds the power to drive mortals to madness and death. Many wouldn't do this, or rather, many couldn't do this, not until they had no other choice and even then, think of Boyang, and even Bosacius, granted the latter had lost his mind by then. And that's where I think she's unique, because she technically has a choice, unlike individuals like Xiao whose... direct 'responsibility' and contract it is to do what he does. She could walk away tomorrow if she willed it, but she doesn't. Yes, responsibility plays into it, but the Chasm really hits differently when you tie it into that.

Now, I do need to note that I firmly stand against any believe that she a death wish or is thoroughly depressed. She isn't going down there over and over because she seeks an end to her life in some way or because she believes her life to be worthless. Quite the contrary, actually, and one could argue that the reasoning for that lies with her survivor's guilt. But all in all, before I get sidetracked again: Yelan embraces solitude to a rather extreme extent, and yet she doesn't seem to harbor a dissociation from the rest of humanity or dislike of it, but she does seem to place a firm line between non-allogenes and herself (and others who hold a vision). But what I mean with embracing solitude, is that while she is social, and she understands the laws and diplomacy of social behavior, she isn't one to always engage in it, simply because many don't seem to quite... share her headspace.

#[ meta. ] the chances are if i open this door; there can be no witnesses left alive. is that a sufficient reason for you? #[ honestly this is the biggest mess; but i've wanted to touch on this for a while even while this is a mess. ] #[ it's just the concept of-- there's a difference between dynamics where this on surface-level doesn't matter so much. ] #[ but it does explain the differences beween /some/ dynamics and most. xiao and yelan is one of them-- ] #[ but with xiao there's arguably the concept of karmic debt and how dangerous it is to non-allogenes. ] #[ and this sense of solitude is inherently ingrained in him in vastly different ways. but there /are/ some similarities. ] #[ but all in all-- this for example also plays into why i can only ship yelan at present with wriothesley. ] #[ and it's mostly because of the way his life seems to have led him to make a similar decision of likely staying in the meropide... ] #[ for the rest of his life. that's a specific type of decision to make that i think many couldn't make as easily. ] #[ not saying he made it as easily-- but it's this concept of... i think the only ones who really would understand are the ones... ] #[ who are able to make a similar decision or have already. i don't think every characer's 'loneliness' should be supplemented... ] #[ or 'fixed' by another's or someone who's the opposite. it needs to hit right; it needs to click just right for me. ] #[ and this one does. ] #[ it's the similarities with /just/ enough differences that you create a balance in which there's a semblance of peace. ] #[ but a peace that isn't constant. ] #[ i don't know how to word-- i just. 😭 one day you guys will get a proper meta from me on this. ]

[twicedailyquotes]

There's a really good chance I'll never do anything. It's selfish and self-centered to consider, but it scares me.

Marina Keegan

The Opposite of Loneliness

#quote #quotes #marina keegan #the opposite of loneliness #book quote

[pinkopalina]

as a huge batjokes shipper i want batman and joker to hate each other in the sense they dont really hate each other, they just have really different goals and see their own version of potential in the other and right now hate is the best word for their situationship. they both love the other for what they could be but neither of them wants to be what the other one wants, and that's equally as frustrating as it is necessary for them to keep existing in their current roles. they're deadlocked and that fate surrounding each other is kind of the point -- we both have to be like this, the opposite of what the other wants, for us to keep existing at all, and for giving me that gift i both love and hate you. it's an agreement. i think the hate that's there now is born from an intense underlying love.

i think batman "hates" joker for being so amazing and smart and cunning, for being able to create grand gestures and schemes, to pull people together under his charisma and make them all believe in something, for being as extraordinary as he is but batman hates that he uses it to hurt people. he hates that joker can't channel his energy into doing something good for the world, that he hurts himself and others just because he wants to be batman's greatest enemy. i think batman wants to help joker but also hates him at this point for joker exhausting him, constantly getting hurt both emotionally and physically by him, joker never trying to improve his situation, throwing away other people's lives, showing batman he loves him by lashing out and hurting him. batman hates joker because he loves his rogues, he wants to help them, and he knows they can do better. he wants to live in a gotham that doesn't need batman but he still needs to be needed, because when there's no batman, what is bruce going to be? without joker, he will continue being batman, but it's an empty crusade. some of my favorite interactions between harvey and bruce are the ones where harvey thanks bruce for "always being there for me, never giving up on me, my very best friend." even with someone like harvey, bruce can still hold onto that hope for his rogues, never give up on them, keep going for them, even if it puts them through the cycle one more time.

i think joker hates batman in the most toxic way possible, but it's still love. i just think he's selfish and doesn't want batman to think about anyone else but him, the same way he operates for batman, but if he must think about other people then joker will make it as amazing as possible! i think he hates batman for wasting his time on ordinary people, people who are so boring that batman claims he has to protect and serve and love them but joker thinks it's all surface-level. batman won't kill joker but he'll leave room for people dying in his crusade. it's a choice he allows, and even if joker knows that's a morally fucked up way to put someone in a box, he doesn't care. batman is the type of person to train himself mentally and physically for decades and dress up in a half-silly-half-menacing costume so that everyone can have an idea about him. batman himself is not normal, and joker knows that and loves that! why is he wasting his time trying to save people that use him, abuse him, don't want him to be the best he can be? i think joker's motivations for loving batman and lashing out as if he hates him lie somewhere in between extreme admiration -- like i truly believe in your cause and that you're the right person to do it, but i'm so angry at you for wasting your time on other people and i'm so hurt and jealous that you choose them over me, just so you can be a hypocrite and let them die if i want them to anyways -- and anger at his hypocrisy -- like it's easy for joker to dedicate himself to chaos and just being in batman's life by putting batman in situations that force him to be a better and better hero, but how can batman sit there and choose and pick what morals he'll uphold and who gets to live and who gets to die?

i want to be your greatest enemy because you are the greatest hero ever, and the only way you and i can keep being the best at what we do is if we do it together, because of what we both believe in.

#does this make sense. they love each other because theyre perfect for each other #but in order to create that perfection they have to do things that build resentment #and in order to ebb that resentment they have to be in constant flux. back and forth. ebb and flow. good and evil. chaos and order. #obsession and indifference.... the two themes i think we miss out on the most bc it hurts when indifference is the opposite of love #and obviously these two cannot be indifferent toward the otther #but when they have plots that do they really fucking hurt! #like when lex luthor comes into the picture and helps joker and joker starts to make batman a little jealous #like okay maybe i dont need you to obsess over maybe any strong ideals can overtake me if u lnow what i mean #and then suddenly batmans gotta prove how well he knows joker and has to be on top of him at all times #um anyways i hope these kind of! made sense!!!!!!!!! djhdkjghijsdfhksdfh #like ideally i think joker just wishes he had batman all to himself but knows he has to share #and hes such a jealous baby that he makes it hard for batman bc of it #and batman is like yes joker jesus fucking christ i love you too but you have to let me have friends #and u have to stop killing people #and jokers like why are you friends with murderers and liars and thieves but IM BAD? #and batmans like bc i actually love everyone and want to help you all and that includes u #and jokers like jo fuck you hypocrtie hahaha see at least in my loneliness i have no laurels to rest on #and bruce is like i may struggle with my morals often but that is only because im always figuring out the best way to keep helping everyone #and if i lose sight of that ill go blind and be like you and then u wont have me anymore #lol sometimes funny tag convos get the dynamic better than the meaty posts #long post #anyways sorry i just havee 2937973957273 thoughts about them and so does everyone and i wanna throw my hat in

[tyrannuspitch]

everyone wants to call spring the season of Hope but seriously do long evenings and blank skies and bright white light not make you feel even a LITTLE bit hollow. like not even the SLIGHTEST bit dead inside?

#fighting back against the winter depression lobby with some summer hater posting #if we're assigning emotions to seasons then summer can be stagnation guilt and loneliness 😁👍 #yeah i should stop entrenching this association and take each day as it comes blah blah blah #but everyone else is entrenching their associations on social media 24/7 and it doesn't make having the opposite ones easy

[geometricfractal]

living alone is weirdly inspiring. laundry? guess I'll go do it, no one else will. dishes? they'll just sit there unless I personally wash them. dinner? well. okay that one is still a problem actually

#there's also the slowly creeping loneliness #which is the opposite of inspiring #but hey you win some you lose some i guess

[starpros-sunshine]

I think my main problem with minimalist architecture isn't even that I find it ugly and loveless (which is a separate thing I'll try not to go into) but that it just feels unfinished to me?

Like, I know this is a finished building but it just kinda looks like there's something missing and it irks me on a level that goes beyond if I think it's aesthetically pleasing because I can get that. Not personally but I can see why someone would be into the sleek and stylish cube look because of the "modern" appeal or whatever I can see how someone would explain their like of minimalism in architectural design.

But on a personal level it just feels to me like you started something and then you just. Stopped. Minimalist buildings to me feel like a work in progress that's just been abandoned and given up on. Like when I sketch something and then abandon that to sketch another idea I just had and that goes on and on and on and on so there's this abundance of unfinished sketches that have just been left to themselves but I tell myself that they're finished because "You can see what it's supposed to be. Mission accomplished." And they just make me a little sad to be honest because it looks like someone started something and then they just. left.

#nobody asked nobody cares ikik but I've been looking at buildings and i realised minimalism is the exact opposite of 'it sparks joy' #it sparks sadness #it sparks a feeling of loneliness even #like you'll forever be alone in a hellscape of white #or rather in a hellscape of sleek monochromatic edges and cubic forms #idk it just. #this goes beyond me jusz thinking it's ugly #I think expressionistic sculptures are ugly #but they don't make me feel like I will die alone you know? #they just make me think 'okay this isn't for me. you can like it you can not like it but it's really not my cup of tea.' #minimalistic architecture makes me think 'ah...i see...' <- with the underlying feelings of someone that just realised everyone left them #and they'll be alone until they die #and their only companions will be machines #but there's nothing to be done about it so you just resign yourself to your fate of neverending quiet in this cold space #lacking of any personality or warmth or personal touch or anything that makes a ''home'' per-se #and you start to wonder if you'll ever have a place to call home because this isn't it #at least expressionism has personality right? at least it looks like it had something put into it #minimalism just looks empty #and feels empty and unfinished and abandoned #okay that concludes my little rant #if you could call it that #minimalism feels like the architect didn't even care about their building