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thatweeboverthereisthirsty · 3 years

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OK so I got this idea. S/o (who's this time has to be female) is also an octo mermaid but still from another world. So s/o gets into one of the pools and they discover she's a blanket octopus (if you haven't seen a female blanket octopus they're one of the most beautiful octopus out there with their gradient colors) and they get popular af like everyone is like "wow she's such a beautiful meroctopus" Yada yada. And Azul it's mad. Part 1

Part 2. And both Jade and Floyd notice it and decide to tell s/o who is shocked and sad because they have a HUGE crush so they decided to give him a gift. Since they know he doesn't have a octopus pot they decide to make him one. After months they give it to him and confess and he's shocked and ask for their forgiveness as it isn't their fault. At the end he and s/o cuddle inside of the octo pot in their mer forms.

OMG THIS TOOK ME FOREVER!!!! I probably got this ask before thanksgiving so I am very sorry that it took me this long, HOWEVER, it is the longest oneshot I have ever written so that’s quite an accomplishment. There are photo references that go with this story as well so check those out before you read.

Warnings: Slight language, insecurities, fluff, very very minor angst, fem!s/o

Word count: 4,710

Azul x Reader: Cuddle Pot

The above images are references for the s/o’s octopus species and the octopus pot. I don’t know who the original artist is for the second so if you know please let me know so I can give credit where due.

“Wait seriously? You’re a mermaid!” Ace practically shrieks and you giggle. Placing a finger to your lips, you shush him as Deuce slaps the back of your over energetic friend’s head.

“Yes. I am a mermaid, but you can’t tell anyone yet.”

“Why not?” Jack questions. His tail flicks in confusion.

You sigh and think back to the last time anyone found out about your true form. Most of the people back in your world found merpeople to be odd and cursed. It was considered a disability and a disease. Human society often shunned what they didn’t understand. And that lack of understanding led to fear.

A boy in your old school had been your middle school sweetheart for approximately 7 months before you decided to tell him your secret. He had seemed so eager to finally go swimming with you that you had naively believed that it was all going to be fine. However when he stared at your flowey, shimmering form you felt yourself grow worried that he would no longer like you.

“Babe,” you started, leaning closer to try and grasp his face with your smooth, webbed fingers. “It’s alright. It’s just my merform. It’s going to-” He quickly slapped your hand away and stumbled back.

“F-freak, monster, disgusting. Stay away from me you animal! We’re over you deceiving B*tch!” He quickly ran away from the side of the lake where you had brought him. As dawns lovely lights sprayed your body with pinks, and soft oranges, tears slid down your cheeks and into the water below. He hated you. Oh what a fool you had been to think that he would be different, that he would love you anyway.

School had become increasingly difficult after that. Word spread fast and you were quickly isolated by everyone you had called a friend. Eventually you moved to a new place and decided that you would never love again.

This wasn’t the case however in Twisted Wonderland. You were so pleasantly surprised to find people like you, and they weren’t considered freaks because of it. It had been a shock and you quickly found yourself yearning to tell others about what you truly were. Fear had you back though. At least up until that point.

“I had a bad experience with someone I cared about back in my home world.” You stated softly. The boys looked at each other and smiled.

“Well this isn’t that world. You're good to go here since I can’t imagine anyone judging you for what you look like in this place.” Ace’s words reassured you.

“He’s right. At NRC it’s highly unlikely that you’ll be bullied because of something like this. But what are you anyway?” Deuce questioned.

You giggled and leaned in closer to the 4 people sitting at the lunch table, (5 if you included Grimm, but he already knew). “I’m an octopus.” You said with excitement and slight nervousness.

“Really? That sounds so cool!” Epel was quiet but excited when he spoke up for the first time since the conversation started. You smiled to yourself and mentally sighed in relief that the people you had next trusted with your secret didn’t view you any differently.

“Wait hold the phone. Octopus? Like Azul?” Ace pressed close enough that you could reach across with a napkin and wipe the side of his cheek that had been smeared with BBQ sauce when he scarfed his lunch.

“Yes and no, Azul is a Common Octopus, which means that he is the standard octopus you mostly see around the ocean or in pictures. Basically what you imagine when someone says Octopus. I’m a different type of octopus, one that is more rare.” You pulled out your phone while talking to bring up an image. You held the phone so everyone at the table could see.

“This is a female Blanket Octopus. We’re pretty rare but we are also one of the most beautiful kinds.”

Everyone went wide eyed and watched the screen as you scrolled through images of your fellow eight legged friends. Epel turned to you and grabbed your shoulder.

“You absolutely have to show us your merform.” Ace, Deuce, and Jack all nodded in agreement. You flushed and fiddled with the hem of your shirt.

“I don’t know guys. It would be a hassle to find a place where we could do it and I’m not sure I want anyone else seeing me. What if someone shows up and freaks out?” This time it was Jack’s turn to speak when he leaned back before smiling slightly.

“Not that I care but I personally would show up to support you if you needed it. Besides, the school pool is closed after dark. However I’m pretty sure Ruggie has snatched a copy of every key to every lock in the building.”

“Of course he has.” Deuce says rolling his eyes. “That hyena couldn’t keep his paws to himself even if his life depended on it.” You giggled but ignored the comment in favor of asking Jack if he could get the key. The wolf nodded and you told everyone to meet you by the pool at 9:30. Your friends nodded in agreement just as the bell rang.

----------

The air was humid and warm, it was perfect for a late night swim, although your clothes would likely stick to your body when you changed back. Still you shifted uncomfortably at the idea of getting in the water with what you are wearing. A pair of leggings was slipped on underneath a waterproof skirt. You had a jacket over your bikini top but per usual you were unable to wear bottoms unless you wanted them to tear. You would have to be very careful not to let the skirt go up before you shifted.

A sigh left your lips and Grimm, sensing your nervousness, rubbed up against your leg in silent comfort. Your friends were unlikely to freak out but it was still nerve wracking to think about exposing your true form to other non-merpeople. Hundreds of scenarios where something went wrong filtered through your head and promised that your anxiety wouldn’t leave anytime soon.

“BOO!” Half a shriek pierced the night before a hand clasped over your mouth.

“Shishishishishi.” You turned around in surprise and pulled the fingers away from your face.

“Ruggie! What are you doing here?” You whisper shouted. The hyena snickered again and held up one finger. He made a circular motion and a key ring twirled around in response.

“Jack said you needed to get in here. Thought I’d tag along.” The smirk on his face irritated you but you couldn’t be surprised. You should have known that having Jack of all people ask for keys to break into the pool after hours was going to raise some eyebrows. Honestly you should have just asked him to invite Ruggie along anyways. Key or no key the hyena was likely to want to know what was going on.

“Alright fine, but if you tell anyone what you saw here today, and I mean anyone, then I will hide your piggy bank from you.” Ruggie’s eyes went wide before they narrowed.

“You have my word.” You smiled knowing that you had convinced him to keep your secret despite the fact that if he really had told someone you wouldn’t have actually done more than try and punch him. Of all people you knew how precious money was in this world, considering the fact that you had none.

Footsteps alerted you to the approaching presence of your other friends. You turn

around and find Jack, Epel, Ace and Deuce walking over to you. They wave and Jack frowns when he spots Ruggie.

“What are you doing here? I thought you already gave me the key.” The hyena snickers and points towards the key Jack was holding.

“I gave you the one to the janitors closet, which I’m gonna need back by the way. I wanted to see what was going on for myself so I hung out here till Y/n came over, and then I figured it had to be interesting if she was involved. I didn’t know there was gonna be a crowd though.” He looked at you, “This must be one hell of a surprise if you got all the first years here.”

Deuce pointed out that Sebek was a first year as well but the hyena shrugged it off saying “he doesn’t count as a student since he’s basically just a guard.” You figured that was Leona’s opinion and Ruggie agreed.

“Guys it’s already late and I don’t wanna get caught so let's go in already.” Everyone nodded and Ruggie opened the gate.

Carefully you unzipped your jacket as you walked over to the bench. The water appeared calm and undisturbed, allowing a clear view of the illuminated bottom which was surprisingly clean considering teenage boys flung about in the water all day.

You sighed and shrugged the jacket off before stepping out of your shoes. Setting down the bag with your extra clothes you mentally prepared yourself for what was about to happen.

Ruggie leaned closer to Jack and whispered something you didn’t catch but Jack’s response of “You’ll see.” was enough to tell you what had happened. Pushing your anxiety out of the way you lowered yourself into the pool, sighing as the cool water licked your skin. Giving yourself a moment to relax you let your worries leak into the water around you. You had always felt better in the water. It’s a merfolk thing.

“Are you guys positive you won’t freak out?” You called to the edge of the pool where your friends were standing.

“Not unless you grow 10 heads.” Ace sniggered until Epel elbowed him. You rolled your eyes and looked suspiciously over to Ruggie who still had no idea what was going on.

“No promises.” You sighed, but smiled when Jack nodded at you, signaling that it would be alright. Who were you kidding Ruggie was a hyena man who grew up in the slums. What did he care? Feelings of worry taken care of, you sunk deeper into the water and closed your eyes.

The feeling that comes with shifting is always a little strange. It’s almost like your skin has been turned to putty and it is remolding itself and when it reaches the desired outcome it snaps back into place and holds like it has been that way the whole time.

Once you felt the transformation had completed you righted yourself in the water and peeked an eye open to look at your friends. Ace and Epel had their mouths wide open in a gasp. One that quickly turned into a smile. Jack looked as though he had just witnessed a miracle and Deuce was still in shock. Ruggie’s reaction was by far the most extravagant. His eyes were wide and his mouth was curved into a questioning gape. He had taken several steps back and his ears lay flat on his head. Behind him his tail bristled and stood fairly straight, pushing up the too large shirt.

You bit your lip and examined their faces trying to come up with a conclusion to what they were feeling.

“That… Is so cool!” Ace blurted out excitedly and ran over to the pool's edge to get a closer look. Deuce and Epel followed him and Jack trotted over as well, but not before snorting at Ruggie. The hyena man looked your form up and down and took in the swirling shades of color that decorated your now sea creature bottom half. He made a small noise before shaking himself and casually patting down the fur on his tail, which was still tense but not as much.

“Ok, of all the things I’ve seen. That, I was not expecting.” You giggled at Ruggie’s flustered reaction and felt yourself relax now that you knew pitchforks and torches weren’t coming out.

The hyena moved closer to the pool and joined your other friends who were staring at you in awe. You blushed uncontrollably as you felt their gazes roam your colorful body. Decorative markings that spread up to your collarbone changed to a darker shade with your blush.

“So like can I touch you?” Deuce smacks his hand against Ace’s chest and gives him this look that says “dude you can’t just say that''. You giggle and glide closer to them before lifting your arm which was for the most part pretty human, but had a lavender shade to it and a long silky strip of webbing that shimmered as it moved. The longest tentacle on your body rose out of the water as well and you shivered as the webbing stuck together in an uncomfortable manner.

Ace leaned forwards and stroked your arm and tentacle. His eyes were filled with curiosity and wonder. Deuce looked a little more unsure but Epel had no problem reaching out and gently caressing your webbing. Ruggie joined him and Deuce eventually stuck his hand out to stroke your arm, but Jack held back and decided that ultimately he only wanted to look.

“Wow! This stuff is so soft!” Epel said excitedly. He was generally pretty quiet so you were glad he was comfortable enough to speak out.

“It’s so colorful. If we had silks this pretty in the savannah then we’d have lots of money. Say, where could I find more of your kind.” Ruggie’s smirk told you that he was just joking but you glared at him anyways and flicked water his way.

The hyena flinched and shook his head before laying his ears back and moving away from the water. Jack and Ace laughed at the antics before Ruggie growled playfully and distracted them from what had happened moments before.

It was then that Ace leaned a bit too far forwards and fell straight into the pool. You jumped and swung your tentacles back, instinctively spreading them out to make yourself look bigger.

You willed your body to relax as you recovered from the little panic attack and laughed when Ace’s head bobbed to the surface. He sputtered and swam over to the edge and climbed out of the pool. He lay on the concrete and breathed heavily while the boys around him cackled. Ace glared and stood up.

“You jerks I’ll show you how you like it.” Deuce shrieked as Ace shoved him into the water. You laughed with everyone else as Deuce came up for air. Sensing a sudden threat of being pushed into the water Ruggie backed up against the gate and watched as Jack pushed Epel in before diving in himself. The five of you giggled and splashed as Ruggie snickered at your antics.

You were so glad your new friends didn’t mind your merform. Even better, they really liked it. It felt like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders as you dived down to swim with your friends. As the five of you splashed and played with Ruggie distracted with your antics, none of you noticed a dark form smirk in the bushes. Nor the click of the camera that he had with him.

----------

The next day was a nightmare. Apparently someone had spied on you and your friends and photographed you in your merform. People swarmed you asking you all sorts of questions. It was difficult to just get through the halls. Luckily none of the people who stopped and talked to you had anything unkind to say and the stares you received were more curious than malicious but it was still an uncomfortable situation to be in.

For the most part people who knew you were pretty considerate about your space and privacy. Cater seemed absolutely thrilled to know that you were an octopus but only asked if you were alright with everything going on, instead of bombarding you with questions.

Kalim was a little more enthusiastic about the whole situation. Jamil ended up apologizing for him and pulling him away. Vil and Rook subtly commented on your merforms beauty before moving on. Diasomnia rarely came near you but Lilia gave you a sympathetic smile. Trey offered you a few baked sweets as he sensed that you were overwhelmed and as for everyone else you had yet to see them.

The person you were most worried about seeing though was Azul. He was an octopus merman like you, yet you had never seen his merform. Unless you counted his overblot the only time you had seen him in full shift was in the picture you had borrowed from the museum.

He and the Leech twins will probably have an absolute field day over the fact that you’re also a mertype. You worried what Azul was going to think of you hiding it. Over the past few months you had developed a crush on him. You had a plan to confess and everything, but now that the secret was out you were worried that he wasn’t going to like you for keeping it from him. In truth you planned on telling him first, but figured there was no harm in letting your other friends know. Turns out there was and the whole school knew.

Trapped in your thoughts, you failed to notice the two approaching twins and bumped into them as you turned around a corner.

“Hiii~ Shrimpy-chan~!” Floyd’s ever changing mood seemed to pleasant as he greeted you with a smile and not a squeeze.

“Hello, Y/n. How are you today?” Jade's gentleman persona greeted you but failed to hide the questions and mischief in his eyes.

“Just say it already. I know you two already know.” You sighed and watched their faces light up with excitement. Floyd grabbed your arm and took off, dragging you behind him. “Wait!” Soon the three of you arrived at an empty classroom which you were promptly shoved in before the tweels followed, shutting the door behind them.

“Y/n, my apologies for Floyd’s exuberant behavior, but we have been meaning to speak with you in private since the most recent exposure of your true nature.” Jade was calm and collected as always when he spoke and gently fixed your crumpled uniform which had been shifted while running.

“Shrimpy-chan! We have something to tell you!~” Floyd sing-songed before sitting on a desk.

“What? Wait what is it? And where’s Azul? Wouldn’t he want to speak with me too? If this is about a deal the answer is no.” You folded your arms in front of you and put distance between yourself and the seemingly respectful brother. The twins looked at eachother and you caught a glimpse of something passing through their eyes before Floyd pouted.

“Aww, what’s wrong with making deals with us? We promise to be real nice this time and not leave you homeless. You could stay with us at Octavinelle!” You rolled your eyes as Floyd giggled and swung his long legs despite the fact that they could easily reach the floor from his seat.

“The truth is, Azul is jealous.”

“What!” You turned and exclaimed at Jade’s statement. The tall mage nodded and continued with a strange look on his face like he wasn’t bothered by this at all.

“You are far more beautiful than him in your merform and he is bothered by it. Everyone has always shunned him for his octopus body and now you present yourself as one and everyone goes wild with excitement over your gorgeousness. Something he believes to never have possessed.”

You were stunned. Azul was jealous of you. He was upset because you were more beautiful than him. No. You wanted him to love you, not be bothered by you. Why hadn’t you thought of Azul’s insecurities. He just wanted to be an attractive merman and here you were, the same mertype as him and you were advertising your beauty to the world where he had to hide his away due to the fact that he was insecure.

Not bothering to say a word you quickly left the room and raced down the hall. You needed to fix this as soon as possible. Otherwise Azul might not like you ever again. Two pairs of mismatched eyes watched your retreat and shone with anticipation.

“How long do you think it will take?”

“Not long Floyd. Luckily she was already prepared before we released the picture.”

----------

Azul was so over this whole thing. He had rewatched the video and looked at the pictures about 20 times. You were so gorgeous and graceful in your merform; it just made him frustrated that he couldn have been admired for his tentacles. They were simple and slimy so most people hated them yet you were swathed in colorful silks that attracted every creature in the ocean. While most would swim by him or threaten to eat him, any sea animal that came across you would be hypnotised by your beauty.

The worst thing about you being an octopus is that it gave him one more reason to tell himself that you will never love him. He was so drab and you were well amazing. Of all the creatures in the sea you had to be a blanket octopus. If you had been a simple mermaid or even better a common octopus like him then surely he would have a chance with you at least.

A sudden knock on the door startled the mage and he stood quickly to make sure he looked alright before answering the door. You stood anxiously as he opened the door and grabbed his wrist before he had the chance to shut it. Surprisingly, Azul offered no resistance as you dragged him to the entrance of the aquarium.

Octavinelle’s aquarium had two sections, one was for regular fish and the other sea creatures that were on display from the mostro lounge. The other was for the residents. Any and all merfolk could use the aquarium if they felt homesick or separated from their true forms. This was where you chose to place the gift you had made.

Coming to a stop you turned and looked at Azul. He looked confused and excited at the same time. You took this as a good sign.

“Azul. Will you swim with me?” The merman’s eyes widened and he stood there processing your request for nearly a minute before responding.

“Sure.”

Giddy with glee you quickly leapt into the water and shed your clothes before transforming. Rising to the surface you looked up at him from just underneath the surface and he peered back at you.

Strange. He thought for sure he would feel angry again when he saw you but the darling flush on your face and how you were genuinely happy to swim with him gave him another feeling all together. It bubbled inside of him and made him blush as he slowly lowered himself into the cool water beside you.

It had been a while since Azul had consciously shifted so he was a bit worried that he would do it too fast or slow and something would go wrong. Fortunately he was able to shift without incident. Once shifted he suddenly felt very self conscious. As a common octopus he was far more simple and plain compared to your swirling and colorful body.

You didn’t seem to mind however as you twirled and circled around Azul excitedly.

“Come on I have something to show you.” Azul frowned in confusion but followed you regardless. You led him to a sort of grove area that he had never seen before. It was very well hidden but gorgeous as well.

You looked back at him excitedly and pushed through the sea vines to an open area where a ray of sunlight fell across and illuminated the gift you had spent months on. Azul’s jaw dropped when he laid eyes on the octopus pot that sat in the middle of the small room.

The base was grey and made of some type of stone. Around it sat lavender pillars and corals that surrounded the base except for the entrance. The round opening was smoothed and carved in a delicate design that resembled sea coral. Behind it sat a dark velvet cloth that was tied back with a golden rope.Azul assumed that was to block the entrance or allow for privacy.

The inside was decorated with lavish pillows in all sorts of cool shades. They were illuminated by a small yet classy lamp that hung off to the side. The outside of the pot was for the most part smooth and grey with a few purple undertones, but off to one side there sat a carving that resembled the waves and water foam, on top off which held a large pearl that glinted in the sunlight. On the other side a darker grey octopus clung to the top portion of the pot and spread its tentacles out in an elegant manner. Azul took note that the few that rose off the pot appeared to be for hanging things and one looked suspiciously like it was meant to support a staff.

You floated in place for what felt like hours as you waited for Azul to react. You reminded yourself to stay patient as he might not respond to it immediately. When he finally did react he did so without words. He simply pointed to himself and raised his eyebrows. You nodded excitedly before bowing your head bashfully.

“I’m so sorry that I upset you Azul. I never meant for it to get out in the first place. I was actually planning on telling you first and then giving this octopus pot to you since I know you don’t have one. Then things got messed up and everything and I’m so sorry. I think you’re beautiful in your merform and I hope you’ll accept my apology.” Your face burned when you spoke and you swished your tentacles nervously.

“What?” You looked up when Azul spoke and saw confusion on his face. “I’m not upset at you. It’s not your fault you’re beautiful. Besides I could never be upset at you, octopus or not. I was distraught because I thought you were so amazing and I’m so plain and that there was no chance that you’d like me back.” You gasped and watched as his face slowly turned pink.

He dove into the pot and curled up, mentally berating himself for letting that slip. Shocked you glided over to the entrance of the pot and leaned your head in.

“Azul. Do you mean that? Do you really like me?” He didn’t respond, you took a deep breath and admitted your own feelings. “Well I like you so…” His head snapped up and he let his expression grow into an ecstatic smile before coughing into his fist and composing himself.

“Well in that case, do you want to come in and lay with me?” Azul ignored the fact that his face felt like it was on fire and waited as you giggled and moved in beside him.

“I’d love to. What do you think of the pot?” The merman smiled gently at you and spoke as he curled his tentacles around you and yours, him.

“It’s exquisite. I couldn’t love it more. Where did you get it?”

“I made it.” You muttered and flushed at the surprised and impressed look on his face. He shifted closer to you and gripped your hand with his.

“You did an excellent job. Thank you.” Your fingers intertwined with his and you pressed your forehead against his.

“I love you Azul.” You mumbled sleepily.

“I love you Y/n.” He spoke before shutting his eyes and enjoying the warmth that spread through the pot. You’re silky webbing fell across the two of you like a blanket and after a stressful morning Azul allowed himself to slip into a comfortable sleep.

----------

Two pairs of heterochromatic eyes watched the two octopus merpeople sleep soundly inside the pot and smirked with wicked teeth.

“How did you know she was an octopus as well?”

“Floyd, surely you must have noticed. They both smell like takoyaki.” The eels laughed and quietly zipped away, leaving the octopus pot behind.

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nahimjustfeelingit-writes · 4 years

Text

Imagine 😈

Erik getting caught fucking a sex doll and plus sized Reader catches him in the act/ Fic inspired by Tanerélle- Mama Saturn.

Warnings: Straight up SMUT. Nothing but smut.

Y/N.

A sinful treat that Erik wanted to devour every single time he saw her. Sexy bitch. He likes a girl that’s a bit of a challenge to get into his bed. She didn’t wear her pussy power on her sleeve. Not a church girl exactly but one who’ll play mouse to his sharp-clawed cat. Y/N was exactly that challenge. She’s a plus sized model from Washington DC that Erik had the pleasure of meeting during a block party/ fundraiser in Oakland CA for the Wakandan Outreach Center.

She volunteered for one of the booths there and Erik couldn’t help but to talk to her. She compelled him. Erik found himself enjoying her east coast accent and how much she loved being a model. It was the only thing she’d ever wanted to do, and she was in it for the long haul. She was turned down plenty of times; denied opportunities because of her “shape”. Bullshit. Complete bullshit. Her shape, her overall beauty...Erik’s thoughts lingered on her pretty face and equally beautiful body even after he went home from the office, picturing her standing behind him while he showered, arms wrapped around his waist, her face nuzzled into the small of his back.

Okay...that wasn’t all he pictured. He’d pictured bending her over his California King Bed, her hands fisting the 800 thread count sheets while he plunged his fat dick deep inside of her throbbing pussy, making her cum almost instantly. He pictured her losing some of the calm control she exerted over every other aspect of her being, trusting him to be there to catch her as she trembled her way to ecstasy. From simple meet ups whenever she came around the Outreach, Y/N wasn’t the girl who threw her pussy around like a Frisbee. Fucking perfect. He liked inexperienced puss.

Good, Erik wants that. He wanted nothing more than to break that puss in hot and raw with his sizable appendage. A pretty puss that he could turn out. She’ll remember him in that pretty kitty. He’d never taken the time to actually become friends with a women without sex being involved. Y/N was just that. She would come over at times to chill with Erik, watching movies or chatting it up. Even though Erik wanted to fuck her, he still appreciates the times where they would just link up and bond. It got so crazy that Erik gave her a spare key whenever she needed a place to escape to when he was out of town with his cousin; the King of Wakanda. Every time he would come back home, her smell...nutmeg and vanilla bean would still be there. In his sheets. In his kitchen. On his couch. Ugh. He was half tempted to let her move in since she couldn’t stand living with her roommate.

“Have you ever had your big, juicy ass properly worshipped?”

That’s what he wanted to ask her while staring at her proud, thick, curves before him, imaging the luscious mocha color of her booty straining as she bounced gently up and down his big, fat dick. Her heavy bottom was the perfect roundness, a reward for Erik’s months without sex, of yearning to kneel down in front of her, to taste her sweet pussy and touch her beautiful voluptuous body.

This is all your fault, Y/N

Erik found himself doing something he hasn’t done in a long time. It was a late Thursday evening, he drove past a Sex Shop he’s been meaning to explore. Succulent was the name of it, one of the C’s blinking in and out from the faulty light bulbs. Big, read cursive letters over top of a sleazy adult toy shop in the heart of Oakland on a rainy Thursday evening. He needed a release. He hadn’t seen Y/N for a couple of days since she went to visit family in Atlantic City. She teased him with a few sexy pics in skimpy dresses and bikinis and Erik shamelessly beat his hefty dick to the images.

Parking his car, paying the meter to avoid a ticket, Erik pulled his windbreaker hood over his head to shield the rain drops, slamming his door shut before checking that the coast was clear to cross over. Once his left foot hit the cracked and wet pavement, Erik stood in front of the sex shop, rain hitting his lashes and the tip of his nose, his face illuminated by the LED lights that warmed his russet skin and sparked his nerves. In the display window, there are a few tall boxes with a picture of a very very titillating black women that looked like a cosmic beauty with an Afro and eyes that sparkles like diamonds. Her naked body glistened like some supernova sex goddess, skin like midnight. On the outside of the boxes there are big, bubble gum pink letters surrounding it.

Mama Saturn Kan Make U Kream!

Erik opens the door, a soft bell dinging above his head. The shop smelled like scented candles. The rug was a plush royal purple and the lights were dimmed to set the mood. Rows and rows filled with any and everything SEX. Occupying the register is a young black girl with long passion twists in her hair pulled up into a bun, a matching legging set colored peach with gold gladiator sandals on her feet. She’s currently standing on a step ladder, putting up the same sign in the window above a display behind the register.

Mama Saturn Kan Make u Kream!

“Hi!!!”

She was upbeat and good-humored with a pretty smile and hazel eyes. Erik returned a half smirk, the dimple in his right cheek creating a deep hollow. He removed his hood before taking his right hand to shake out his tapered dreads.

“My name is Shay, if you need any help at all, let me know,” she looked Erik over with appreciative eyes.

“I’ll let you know if I need anything Shay,” Erik says before walking further into the store, his eyes moving from left to right as he took in the scenery. Smaller shelves filled with DVD’s and porn magazines were situated in the front. Erik picked up a few to look over. Ebony Lust, XXX Cocoa, Busty Mochas, Ghetto Booty Queens...

This store must be owned by a black male or female. Erik really liked that. He could see a few white men flipping through pages, eyes as big as saucers staring at all that chocolate, divine booty and pussy on those pages, the visuals popping out at them like 3D pictures. Erik bobbed his head to Megan Thee Stallion’s- Sex Talk while peeking down a few aisles to explore. What Erik hadn’t noticed until now is that there are booths in the back with a black velvet curtain as the only concealment. Curious, gait so smooth, Erik made his way down an aisle filled with male sex toys to see what was behind those curtains.

Finally there, standing before one of them, Erik pulled the curtain back. The booth was small and cramped. It was one of those booths where you put a quarter in a slot to watch a quick porn scene. The booth and walls were nice and clean, painted black like the curtains, but Erik could only imagine how it looked before. Cum stains on the floor and on the booths, women watching the thirty second flick while rubbing themselves down. Men slipping their dicks past the velvet curtains like a glory hole so they could provide something for the women to suck and slurp on.

“You can go in if you like. It’s only a quarter.”

Erik was alarmed when he felt a small hand rub the tension from his muscles. Turning to look over his broad shoulder, Erik’s whiskey-colored eyes fell on a 5’5, caramel skinned baddie. It was Shay, the store clerk.

“Just make sure you wipe up when you’re finished, okay?”

Erik chuckles, releasing the curtain so that it can close, “Damn...it gets that messy, huh?”

“Oh, yeah,” Shay shakes her head with a grin, “I can’t even begin to tell you what goes on beyond these curtains...some of the shit I’ve seen...”

“Wild,” Erik licks his lips.

“Like I said, you can go inside, the flicks are only thirty seconds but it’s worth it,” She says with a honeyed tone.

“Yeah...I need more than thirty seconds to bust a nut, ma. That’s not nearly good enough.”

“Oh?” Shay folds her arms across her small cleavage, “See...I can tell you’re no amateur. You’ve probably tried a lot of the toys in here with women.”

Erik’s lips twisted in thought, eyes heavenward, “I’ve tried a lot of things...I guess you can say I’m an expert...what? You got something that will spark my interest?”

“Just the thing,” Shay walks closer, making her voice smaller, “ Mama Saturn can make you cream.”

“Mama Saturn?” Erik blinks his eyes down at Shay before pointing towards the front of the store, “You mean the sex doll in the display window? Nah, that’s not my type of thing, baby girl.”

“You’d be surprised. Ten have already been sold and they came in today. They’re selling out in other sex shops too. Thanks to one of Tony Stark’s ex-employees that worked in his artificial intelligence department.”

Erik’s eyes squinted as he elevated a single brow down at Shay. If one of Tony Stark’s ex-employees created Mama Saturn it must be an impressive design, almost like the real thing. He knew it had to cost an arm, leg, and head. Erik wasn’t going to lie, he is curious about the sex doll. He remembers laughing about men fucking sex dolls. Who would want to stick their dick in a plastic blow up doll to bust a nut? The shit was comical.

“Well, I’ll leave you to it,” Shay gently squeezes Erik’s bicep, “if you change your mind about Mama Saturn, you know where to find me, handsome.”

Erik regarded Shay as she sashayed away down one of the rows filled with erotica before disappearing completely. It was midnight and he was standing in a sex shop. He came here to buy something he probably already has packed away in one of his heavy duty suitcases at the back of his closet. Toys he hasn’t used in FOREVER since he laid his eyes on Y/N. He’s been courting Y/N for months. Yes, Erik “the pussy monster” Stevens. He didn’t earn that nickname just for the fun of it.

He could only imagine the women he used to sleep with seeing him again. They wouldn’t hesitate to give him the finger or an evil scowl and for the most part he didn’t blame them. He was selfish, greedy and horny in his younger years, too full of himself to appreciate the true joy a woman could bring him on all levels. Erik has never been in a situation where he wasn’t in a hurry to get a girl out of her clothes, to figure out who she was by the way she writhed, the way she moaned his name into the pillow or his ear, the way she came on his dick or his tongue.

Deciding to get something quick; some new BDSM toys, Erik grabs a basket, filling it up with handcuffs, edible lube, vibrating tongue covers, candles for hot wax play, nipple clamps, floggers, anything so he could get home for the evening. An evening he could be spending sitting up on the phone with Y/N, her sweet voice keeping him company while he was in bed. Erik trailed to the front of the shop, standing behind a few men. One of them he noticed carried a box with the sex doll inside; the long box in front of him.

“That will be…$105.86,” Shay watches the customer insert his chip into the card machine, his transaction completed.

“I can help you!” Shay called to the man with the sex doll. She began ringing him up, Erik’s eyes looking at one of the boxes in the window.

Tell me all your names, baby

Tell me all your names, I need to know

Then I'll tell you mine, baby

Then I’ll tell you mine and we can go

To past the time

Shift paradigms

Align our bodies with the sky

'Til I am yours and you are mine…

The song began to play with the surround sound of the sex shop. The sultry voice called for him, tickling his ears and making the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

I'd do anything for you

Yeah, I’d do anything for you

Baby, just say the word

And we make perfect sense

God could not resist no

I can feel the urge

To drop defense

At my expense

Allow my body to ascend

Along with yours

Let love commence…

“That’s all for you today?”

Erik was the only one left in line now.

“Shit, it’s late as hell,” Erik spoke in his defense, “Long ass day.”

“No problem, handsome,” Shay rings in his items, “Candles?”

“You never know,” Erik chuckles with his signature half smirk.

Close my eyes, embrace my matter

Swing my hips as if they bear the rings of Mama Saturn

Stretch my vertebrae so we can climb it like a ladder

And step into our world…

“Who is this?” Erik asks with fondness in his voice.

Mama Saturn,” Shay says with a coy smile, “Well, she’s who inspired the design of this sex doll.

Erik couldn’t keep his eyes off of the boxes in the windows. What was it that made this sex doll so compelling? Maybe it was because he was aching for a sexual release. Maybe because he wanted to know why this sex doll was so popular. Did it do tricks? Did it talk to you? Was it designed to feel like the real thing? A really pussy?

“...how much for one of those sex dolls?”

Shay tried to fight a smile but the corners of her lips couldn’t help but to turn up.

“2,000.” Shay says flat out.

“Makes sense,” Erik didn’t flinch at the price, he expected it to be that much especially since it was created by an ex-coworker of Tony Stark.

“Last chance,” Shay teases, all of his other items priced at $78.86.”

“Shit, why not, add one to the total.”

—————————-

Friday Evening

“hmmm what can you do?” Erik paced his bedroom in a pair of grey sweats and a plain white T-shirt. The manual for Mama Saturn rested between his fingers, the doll itself sitting in a recliner chair in his bedroom. The doll was indeed impressive. The skin felt so real, the face just as mind blowing. Erik honestly felt that 2,000 was a snag compared to what it should be retailed for. He had it charging since this morning since he planned on testing it out tonight.

“Mama Saturn can make you cream...I act out live fantasies for you...charge me up and take me for a ride...you won’t even tell the difference between the real thing and me...”

Erik shakes his head before folding up the instructions. He looked over at Mama Saturn sitting in the chair, the eyes on that doll feeling more and more realistic the longer Erik gazed. Tearing his eyes away, Erik reached for his glass tumbler filled with cognac, taking a long sip. Was he really going to fuck a sex doll? The thought of it has him laughing into his glass. Wiping liquor from his chin, Erik’s phone began to vibrate in his pocket. Erik pulls it out to find Y/N calling him. Placing his drink down, Erik answers the call, resting on the edge of his bed.

“Hello?”

“Erik?”

He felt warmth creep up his belly.

“Hey,” He says with a soft spoken voice.

“I missed you,” She sighs, “I had to cut my vacation short.”

“I missed you too,” He really wanted to tell her to come see him since her trip ended so quickly, “Wasn’t even there for 48 hours.”

“Well...my family is pretty broken. I was hoping to make amends but that didn’t work out. I was not going to be there for two more nights and deal with it.”

Erik lays back against his bed, sliding the instructions to Mama Saturn to the side, “If i were there to keep you company the trip would have been better...am I lying?”

She giggles, “No. you would have made it even better.”

Y/N grew silent on the other end, the sound of her turn signal blaring through the phone.

“Where are you?” Erik asks.

“I’m on my way home from the airport. I’m tired, I need some sleep. I have a lingerie shoot in the AM.”

“Jet lagged, huh?” Erik runs his fingers through his dreads, “Once you get in that house you’re ass is gonna be passed out on the couch.”

“I know! I was thinking damn it’s a Friday night and I’m usually eating Chinese with Erik intstead of by myself on his couch but yessss I am entirely too tired to stay up late. Rain check?”

Erik hopes he didn’t have disappointment in his voice when he responded, “Yeah, of course. If you’re free tomorrow you can come over.”

“I’ll hold you to that, Erik...let me get off of this phone, I’m almost home. Night, Erik!”

“Night, ma,” Erik ends the call, resting his phone against his chest, “Damn…”

Erik looks up and over his head at the sex doll. Lifting up, stretching his arms above his head, Erik exhales before removing his sweats and his T-shirt, sitting on the edge of the bed completely naked now minus the gold chain around his neck and his Nike socks. His dick was semi erect between his legs, resting against his inner thigh. The minute he went to grab his smooth, brown dick it thrummed against the palm of his hand. Erik rolls his tongue along the inside of his left cheek.

Standing, Erik walks over to his closet, opening it and grabbing one of his suitcases filled with sex toys. Opening the suitcase, Erik grabs a bottle of lube before closing it back up. Erik shook the bottle, the contents inside sloshing around. Erik with his lube in hand walked over to Mama Saturn seated on his recliner chair. He stood before the sex doll, his eyes dancing over it, wrapping his mind around the fact that he was about to fuck the shit out of this doll. Grabbing the remote control that came with it, Erik admires the different vibration and pulse settings.

Erik grabs the sex doll, bringing it to his bed before resting it in the middle of it. Even caressing the thighs was bizarre. Eyebrows disappearing behind the curtain of tapered dreads resting over his forehead, Erik pulls the legs apart on Mama Saturn, eyes growing wider the more he stares at her “pussy”.

“No fucking way,” Erik was stunned.

Before him is a pussy molded for him to deep-dive into. The ULTRASKYN material is smooth. He was going to need A LOT of lube to help his fat dick glide inside of Mama Saturn’s soft, fully detailed vagina. Erik takes his finger tips to stroke the outer lips of her mound. Erik cracked a smile when he used his finger to insert inside of the realistic sex doll. Flexible, walls covered with countless ridges to create a realistic sensation.

“Shit,” Erik says barely above a whisper, “they weren't playing when they made you…”

Erik removes his finger, grabbing up his lube to cover his dick and balls generously before doing the same thing to Mama Saturn’s vagina and...how impressive, her asshole. Three holes to explore including her life-like mouth with lips so full. Mama Saturn is amazingly detailed from the smooth texture of her skin to her brown eyes with luxurious lashes, curly fro, and plump lips. Erik decided to try out the mouth first. His dick hasn’t been in a woman’s mouth for months. This will have to do for now until he finally gets a chance with Y/N.

Using his fingers, Erik opens her mouth, amazed to see a smooth pink tongue and a deep throat. It’s a sex doll so he knew it would be never ending. His pipe would be able to go deep in all three of her holes without a barrier. Grabbing his dick at the base, jerking it, Erik lines his dick up with the mouth on Mama Saturn before pushing himself fully inside.

“Ooh?” Erik shuttered, his gluteal muscles tight, “fuck...fuckk.”

Shocked, confounded, dazed, Erik stared down at the doll like it came to life and slapped him across his pretty face. What else can you do, he thought before grabbing the remote, pressing a random button. His body almost fell on top of the sex doll. Erik just knew that there was some man out there, lonely and undesired who would marry this fucking doll. Mama Saturn’s mouth and throat are lined with stimulators to make Erik bust strong and hard. The squishy, ribbed texture along with the way it pulsates and vibrates had Erik grabbing a fist full of the doll's hair that felt so silky smooth to the touch, the curls coiling around his thick fingers.

“Goddamn,” He whispered shallowly from his lungs, “ahhhHHH, fuck this fucking doll ain’t no joke!” He spoke through clenched teeth.

Who knew a damn sex doll would make his balls tight and heavy with cum and his dick so damn hard he could bench press a barbell. His thrusts became even more sloppy, hips smashing into the realistic face of Mama Saturn. So much room for him to swivel his hips, ram his dick in hard and fast, and yank and pull her hair. No teeth, just straight slippery ridges giving him an ultimate sensation.

“Unh, shit,” Erik felt the muscles in his back flex, “Shit is so deep.”

Deeper than the real thing. Nothing compared to the real thing, NOT AT ALL but Erik could understand in that moment while his dick went in and out with a gluttony to cum why this toy sold as much as it did. One thing for him to check off his list of sexual exploration. The sheen of sweat on his back trickled down over his ass and the muscles in his arms trembled the more he lowered that doll's mouth over his dick.

“SHIT- oh my fucking God-“

Erik pulls his dick out, stroking it a good two times before his thick, tasty cum landed on the doll's face. It was the vibrations and the pulses. He’d never cum that quick from oral.

“Mmmm,” He moans, before rubbing the last bit of his nut on the doll’s face, “This is so wild.”

Dick still poked out and nowhere near softening up, Erik pries Mama Saturn’s legs apart, staring down at the realistic vagina with horny curiosity. Once again, Erik slips his fingers inside, closing his eyes and imagining that it was Y/N’s pussy he was fingering. She had to have the fattest pussy ever, not to mention the wettest pussy ever. She would probably cover his entire hand with her slick juices. Biting his lip, Erik lines his sensitive, wide tip up with the tight opening on that damn doll. With a slight shake of his head, Erik’s dick slipped past the flesh-like labia before fully burying inside.

“Ugh! Shit!” Erik’s head flew back, eyelids flickering, “Shit don’t make no sense…”

He was frustrated with himself for fucking a sex doll when he could be ten inches deep in Y/N’s pussy with his balls slapping her ass. Hips pistoning in and out of Mama Saturn while his sweat dropped from the tip of his nose, Erik kept his eyes closed as he imagined this doll being Y/N, staring up at him with her innocent brown eyes, confused and moaning. He imagined that he was with her, sliding hot and nasty against her sweaty body, watching her arch and stretch as he pulled his dick almost all the way out of her gorgeous, slick pussy, then slamming it back in and making her scream.

“Y/N...damn...your pussy feels so good Y/N...I knew that puss would be nice and tight for daddy’s fat dick, baby...I just wanna make you cum, girl...fuck...I just wanna feel that sticky cum all over this big-fucking-dick-

“Erik?”

“Yeah? I’m in that pussy baby? Daddy fucking that pussy?”

“Erik…”

“Yeah, call daddy’s name like that, Unh fuck, girl...pussy is so damn good-

“Erik!”

His eyes popped open almost instantly when he heard Y/N’s voice elevate. The vibration from Mama Saturn shot straight to his heavy sack before Bam!!!! His cum filled that toy to the hilt. Erik pulled his body away from the doll, staring at it with bewildered eyes while his dick bobbed up and down between his legs. Did it just speak? Now his mind was really playing tricks on him…

“Erik-Erik I’m, I’m so sorry.”

A jarring expression on his sweaty face, Erik turns towards the entrance to his room to find Y/N standing there in a fabletics outfit with a Nike cap covering her braided hair, white Nike huarache on her feet, and a take out bag in her left hand. She was frozen, her eyes dancing between the doll covered in his cum and his naked body glistening and still very much hardened.

“Y/N-

“I’m really fucking sorry Erik, oh, fuck, I’m so fucking sorry I feel so bad for walking in on you like this, Erik shit, I’m sorry-

“I...I thought you were going home?”

“I...was...but...I…” she instantly stopped speaking. Y/N’s eyes could not stop looking at the doll and Erik’s body. She was half-tempted to drop the food and scurry away but the scene in front of her eyes…

“Y/N? How long have you been standing there?”

Longer than she would like to admit. When Erik hung up she decided last minute to surprise him with food. Y/N wanted badly to see Erik, hoping that tonight would finally be the night that he would take advantage of her but instead he’s taking advantage of a sex doll that he envisioned was herself taking his big ass dick. All that dick that he was giving to a sex doll…

“I’m just...I think...Erik I’m sorry,” Y/N turned on her heels, taking wide strides to his kitchen to drop off the food and rush out of his luxury apartment. She didn’t know that having his key would lead to her walking in on him having a blast with a sex doll. She felt embarrassed. Erik looked abashed for a second but then his body seemed to relax, his nudity and the sex doll with its legs wide open before him just another thing in his room.

“Y/N! Wait!” She could hear Erik getting up from his bed. Looking over her shoulder, she could see Erik walking towards her, still naked, dick swaying, eyes soft and pleading for her to stay.

“Erik, I’m sorry,” She couldn’t stop apologizing. She was at his door, twisting the knob when his hand grasped her shoulder. Y/N didn’t turn, she couldn’t bring herself to face him while his amazingly-built body and that beautiful, fat dick stares back at her, inviting her.

“Stop apologizing,” He used force, turning Y/N completely, her back pressing against the door hard. She turned her head away from him, looking over his sweaty shoulder.

“It’s nothing for you to feel sorry about, Y/N...I just wasn’t expecting to see you tonight…”

She could smell his sweat...it was an intensely masculine scent. The spiced nuances burned her nose, she could even smell a hint of cocoa. His entire atmosphere warmed her and electrified her body in ways she hadn’t felt since forever. Why was he doing this? Standing before her, looking down at her with his blazing eyes, fully naked and still as stiff as concrete.

“Last minute decision,” she stuck her hand in a small pocket on the side of her athletic leggings, “Here...your key back-

“Nah,” Erik folded his hand over hers, “Keep it...I like it when you use it...makes me think you live here with me…”

She looked at him then. Their eyes matched the same compulsion.

“What?” He asks with a whisper.

“...Erik, I should go,” Y/N went back to twisting the knob but her eyes stayed glued to his, “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He closed his eyes before raising a single brow, “I really wish it was you instead, Y/N...I really wish it was you, girl.”

His eyes opened and THAT'S when things really turned up. His body pressed into hers, the flesh of his girthy dick resting against her stomach from their height difference. He was still sticky down there from using lube to fuck that doll. She swallowed spit, lower lip trembling as she watched his face get dangerously close to hers.

“You don’t know how bad I need you,” He mumbles, “Stay, please? here,” Erik reaches for her hand, Y/N’s fingertips touching the swollen, wide tip of his dick. She gasped, eyes glossy. Erik made her wrap her hand around his dick, her fingertips barely touching.

“Please?” His eyes swam with lust as he studied her face.

The urgency in his voice made her quiver. This was too much to unfold at the moment. The doll was still on his bed. Could she really have sex with him right now after he just ejaculated inside of a fake vagina? His fingers lightly touched her hips and Y/N’s lower lip rested between her teeth. While she nibbled nervously, Erik’s warm breath tickled her cheek. His lips were so close.

“I wanna fuck you,” He whispered, “I wanna fuck you so bad, Y/N.”

“Not now, Erik,” Y/N pushed herself away from him gently, quickly opening the door, “I’m sorry.”

She didn’t look back, her mind was swirling with tremendous confusion. She did have an early shoot in the AM and she was indeed jet lagged. As he called her name, his voice desperate, Y/N decided to take the staircase so he wouldn’t follow her, or worse, pick her up and carry her back into his apartment, MAKING HER STAY. She stopped on the next level to catch her breath before deciding to take the elevators the rest of the way down. How was she going to face him the next day after what she just witnessed? She had to sleep it off.

—————————

Y/N sat down on a fluffy white sofa after shooting her last few pictures with her personal photographer. Dressed in a black leather lingerie set with matching leather gloves and a choker that spelled out Baby Girl in silver lettering, Y/N thought about what happened just six hours prior.

She didn’t call or text Erik. She couldn’t bring herself to do it yet. He gave her space even though a part of her missed his silly texts. He liked to send her voice messages instead of typing. She didn’t complain, his husky voice was ear porn for her.

“We did good today,” Her photographer, Bruce, a good friend and talented artist says while looking at her pictures on his camera, “You just get sexier and sexier every time I see you.”

She blushed, “Thanks, Bruce. When are you going to show me those sexy polaroids of your fiancé and all her thickness?”

“I’ll bring them next week, I promise,” Bruce walks away to put his camera in its designated bag.

“Let me get dressed,” Y/N stood up from the sofa, “I’ll lock up, Bruce, you don’t have to worry about it. Go home and take your fiancé to brunch.”

“You’re sure? Ain’t no rush for me.”

“I’m positive, go on,” Y/N waved him away while grabbing a robe from her vanity to put on, “Treat her to some food and have a good time.”

“Thanks, Y/N, I’ll see you next week, Aight? I got Jayla hooking you up with a sexy set of dresses. I’ll see you at 8 AM, next Saturday.”

“Can’t wait! Bye Bruce!”

Y/N gave him a final wave as she watched him leave the studio. She was just about to gather her things and get dressed when a knock came to the studio door. Y/N sat her things back down, walking towards the front of the studio and finding a man standing at the door, his head downcast as he typed on his phone. She couldn’t make out his face because it was shielded behind a hood. He wore a denim jacket over his hood with a pair of black cargo pants and black and white Jordan 13’s on his feet.

Her phone rang. Reaching into her robe pocket, Y/N pulls out her phone.

Erik.

Her eyes shot up towards the door, his eyes staring back at her through the glass. There was no use in ignoring him, he could see her through the glass, wrapped in a robe. With an irregular breath, Y/N walked to the door, unlocking it before stepping away. Erik opened the door, pulling his hood off of his head before allowing the door to swing shut behind him. He turned, locking the door before facing her again with searching eyes.

“How was the shoot?” He asks while placing his hands in the pockets of his denim jacket.

“It was great, always great,” Y/N’s eyes darted around the studio, “What are you doing here?”

“Figured I would try to show up and see you work but I’m too late,” Erik’s eyes burned into hers, “Then I figured we could get something to eat and talk about what went down last night before you ran away from me.”

She wasn’t getting out of this. Y/N motioned for Erik to follow her towards the back of the studio where Bruce’s backdrops and furniture were. Erik took a seat on the white sofa, Y/N right next to him, folding her shiny, chocolate legs. Erik couldn’t help but to glimpse a peek of her smooth legs and the little bit of cleavage that teased him through the small opening at the top of the robe. Beneath that thick robe was a body he wanted so deeply he shivered. There was so much to see and taste and touch. If he pulled that robe from her body he wouldn’t know where to start or finish.

“I ain’t expect for you to see all of that,” Erik spoke with his hands, eyes glancing over at her from time to time, “how did you feel when you saw me fucking the doll?”

“Uhm…” Y/N adjusted her hips on the sofa, “It was shocking...I guess I was a little turned on by it…” she couldn’t bring herself to look at him.

“If you were turned on...why didn’t you stay?”

Y/N batted her lashes as she gave him a once-over, “Because it was too much to deal with. The doll...your body…”

“Hm,” Erik observed her with his whiskey eyes, “I really wish you would have stayed with me…”

“I will tonight...I am right now,” She gave him a soft, timid smile.

“Yeah...you are right now,” Erik bites his lower lip, “I’ve been wanting you for months now, Y/N...you heard what I said last night while I was fucking the doll?”

She nibbled on the corner of her bottom lip before shaking her head, “I don’t remember.”

Erik scoots closer, grabbing one of Y/N’s hands, “I said that I wanna make you cum.”

With a shivering inhale, Y/N’s hand in Erik’s became sweaty.

“I’m tired of playing games when I know you’re feeling me too...I know you want me just as much as I want you. I waited for months, I’m tired of fucking around, Y/N.”

“I do want you, I just didn’t want to rush into things. I didn’t want to get my hopes up about you so damn fast but I just couldn’t help myself...Seeing you like that last night I…”

Her brown eyes blazed into Erik’s. Y/N scoots closer, her hand nervously reaching out to tug on the collar of his denim jacket, “How long have you wanted to fuck me, Erik?”

“Since the first time I laid eyes on you,” Erik stared down at her hand pulling harder, the fabric applying pressure against his neck. His smile was that of a predator spotting its prey, victory assured. Pure, dumb-founded lust was painted on her beautiful, round face.

“Same,” She says barely above a whisper, “Oh, Erik.”

That was an invitation to pull her on his lap. Erik wrapped his arms around her plump body, his left hand coming up to palm the back of her head so that he could hold her steady while his thick tongue slipped past her lips and into her warm mouth. Y/N reached up to grasp his shoulders, her breath halting each time Erik’s tongue would graze hers.

“Take this off,” He spoke against her lips, “I need to see all of you…”

Without hesitation, lips still pressed against his, Y/N opened her robe before shimmying it off her shoulders, letting it fall on the floor.

“Damn...this is exactly what I pictured.”

All her curves...all that chocolate skin...everything for him to bite and lick on.

“You looking sexy as fuck in my lap, ma,” Erik’s hands couldn’t resist reaching behind her and rubbing her sizable cheeks.

“All this ass…” He wanted nothing more than to pull all of her weight down on his dick, “You don’t know how bad I want to fuck you right now-

“Please?” She begged.

“You remember how I put this dick in that doll? I was fucking that doll like crazy wasn’t I? with all this big dick you sitting on?”

Visions of him screwing that sex doll with all of his fat dick has her more than prepared to take him right there on that couch no matter how many times it needed to be. She’d fuck him and let him put her body in different positions. Anything he wanted, anything he imagined himself doing, he can do that shit.

“Stand up,” Erik instructed with his hands resting on Y/N’s hips.

She stood from his lap, the sexy lingerie making his mouth water. Erik rose from his seat, taking off his denim jacket and his hoodie. With a white beater stretched across his vigorously ripped body, Erik wraps his toned, bulging biceps around Y/N’s waist, kisses long and hot-blooded while he backs her against a nearby wall. Y/N fought for oxygen between kisses, releasing her lips to inhale but it only lasted a millisecond because Erik’s hungry lips were back on hers.

As sexy as the lingerie was on her beautiful body Erik needed to see all of her before him. Reluctantly releasing his lips from hers, Erik presses his forehead against Y/N’s, his hands trailing over the patent leather of the bra and panties she wore. The set barely covered her breasts or her ass. Heavily breathing against her cheek, Erik reached around to unclamp the bra that was struggling to hold up her DD’s. She didn’t stop him, she didn’t tell him no, she simply allowed him to pull the leather from her smooth chocolate skin.

“They are so fucking pretty,” Erik kisses down her neck, “delicious titties baby…” his lower lip poked out when he got closer to her dark brown nipples, “I ain’t even put your titty in my mouth yet and look what you got my dick looking like…”

She heard his zipper, his jagged, labored breath tickling her nipples, “Look what I got for you…”

She took in the sight of his big black dick and at the moment she could already feel her pussy expanding to take all of him. The throbbing deep inside of her itched to feel just how much that fat dick would pound her. Y/N isn’t nowhere near experienced with big black dicks but staring at Erik’s thick pipe made her want to learn with speedy delight. sucking a dick like that she just has to get that mouthful of sperm. She wanted to slow down, take her time and really ENJOY the sheer pleasure of licking, sucking, feeling, smelling and just making him feel the best he’s ever felt before.

“Damn, Erik…” Y/N licks her bottom lip, “that’s a big fella.”

Erik chuckles, “can you take it though? That’s the question,” His hands came up to squeeze one of her breasts, “big ass titties...you are just perfect.” He was amazed by her sheer motherfucking sexiness. Tongue dripping spit Erik lowers his head to suck one of her nipples into his mouth. Face in between her titties Erik felt smothered in the best way the more she squirmed. Staring at them now they looked bigger than what he expected which makes the situation even better.

Y/N stroked his dick with a twist of her wrist while Erik’s hips thrust back and forth into her hand. She took the time to memorize his length and thickness while slowly jerking him into extreme stiffness. Erik has her breasts covered in saliva the more he nibbled and sucked.

Hissing, Erik removes his lips from her hardened nipple, “put your hands up on the wall.”

Y/N turned, her back arched with her hips propelled back against his dick. Erik got down on his knees, her ass hovering about him, and pulled down her patent leather panties. The tight leather was a struggle to get over her big ass. The panties were digging into her thick thighs and she struggled to stay arched against the wall with her titties smashed.

“Erik,” She called to him, trying to look over her shoulder, “What are you about to do to me?”

Her timid voice has Erik’s dick pointed straight up like a skyscraper. The visual before him, her plump pussy lips peeking at him from the back with her large, wide ass...Erik couldn’t resist giving each cheek a solid slap, the sound echoing in the room as the sting reverberated in his palm, “Have you ever had this big, juicy ass properly worshipped?”

“No,” came her muffled reply as Erik spread her open and let his thick, long tongue explore her sweet curves. His hands pressed painfully into her twin globes before spreading them as far as they could go, giving himself room to taste her sensitive pussy.

“Unh, Erik,” she whimpers.

Erik curled his tongue into a point and dove right in while his finger circled her asshole, teasing it. She took in a sharp breath, her ass jiggling from the pressure he applied. Erik could tell that she never took any dick up her ass and he would surely be the first to introduce it to her.

“Spread your thighs, girl,” Erik commanded, “I’m tryna eat…”

“Fuck, Erik,” Y/N felt his thumbs stroke her wet pussy lips before they parted her pussy lips. Awaiting his assault, Y/N clawed the wall with her acrylic nails. Her mouth fell open wide when she felt his tongue dip in and out of her back door. He was tongue-fucking her ass on his knees, madly slurping and getting it nice and wet. She would have never imagined a man doing that to her, EVER.

“Oooh, Erik! Oooh shit!”

Erik worshipped Y/N’s ass like he would never get another chance, his tongue savoring her sweetness while her pussy juices dripped. Her pussy needed attention too so Erik moved his tongue up and down from her ass to her clit while his sturdy thumbs kept her pussy lips open.

“Ugh, Damn, girl,” Erik swallowed spit, his face shiny, “don’t know where I want my tongue first...this big ass or this fat pussy…”

“All over me, please!”

“Let me taste that clit,” Erik’s lips sucked her clit into his mouth. His eyelids fluttered the more he savored her. Her sweet, sweet pussy compelled him to bury three of his fingers inside of her pussy. When she felt the thickness of his fingers enter her, Y/N shouted, reaching back to hold one of her hefty cheeks open.

“Yes, yes, yes!!!” Erik heard her cry, a little louder than before as he pressed his three fingers deep into her tight tunnel. With her hips rocking back on his hand, Erik feasted on her bottom, her strikingly soft mounds against his cheeks massaging him while he coaxed her into an orgasm.

“Yes! Erik yes! Please keep doing that! Oh God! Erik I’m cumming!!!!!!!”

Quickly, Erik’s fingers left her pussy to spread her ass cheeks extensively, his entire mouth wrapped around her pussy as best as he could since she’s so damn fat down there. He could feel her sticky syrup coat his tongue. He could eat her ass and pussy all damn day but now he needed to be inside of her. Slow stuffing, balls deep, make her cream. That was his motto. He wanted to make her cum on his dick so damn bad.

“Come here,” Erik barked out, picking Y/N up and carrying her to the sofa. He lays her down on her back, spreading her legs wide open for him while she leaned back on her elbows watching. Erik couldn’t wait to get his dick inside of her. The second her pussy lips parted and her tight, wet hole winked at him Erik fisted his dick, dipping his hips low before sliding inside of her. Her head fell back against the sofa, braids resting over her eyes and a steady moan escaping her mouth.

While her head twisted from side to side, Erik watched the way his dick went in and out of her pussy. He loved the sounds her pussy made whenever he pulled his dick all the way out to his wide tip before sliding back in. She was the wettest. Each time he pulled out her juices would gush out.

“This pussy is swallowing this big dick, girl...you ain’t tell me it was this deep...ain’t flinch at all when I got up in this fat pussy.”

“No,” She moaned.

“It’s cuz this pussy needed my dick, huh?”

“Yes,” She closed her eyes, savoring the way his curved erection bounced off her walls, “yes...yes...yes.”

“Yes yes what?” Erik asks while pounding into her on the edge of the couch, “you got my balls heavy with this nut, what’s that yes for, huh?”

“Your dick is just so big inside of me...all up in me…”

Erik threw her legs over his shoulders and rocked into her with a force that has her ass lifting off of the couch to meet his thrusts. It was like magic to her the way her body reacted to him. She grasped his biceps, her bouncing breasts hitting her chin the more he picked up speed. He would thrust fast then slow, repeating that, making her tip over the edge.

“Can I cum please?” She pleaded.

“As long as I get to cum in this pussy, girl,” Erik pulled all the way out, his eyes staring down at her stretched hole, “Can I cum in this pretty pussy?”

“Cum in your pussy, Erik.”

That was all he needed to hear. Erik angles his hips so that he could stroke her G spot with his wide tip. Y/N’s toes curled, her thighs squeezing Erik’s neck. She felt her body shaking and convulsing while his pulsating dick reached depths inside of her she didn’t know existed.

“Oooh, I’m gonna cum,” She mumbled, mouth opening and closing with no sound coming out. She hit Erik’s chest with weak blows before her heavenly pussy pulled his dick into a tight embrace. Erik growled as his glutes tensed. He could feel his veiny dick swell inside of her like he was ready to pop. Erik watched his big dick spurt thick load after thick load into her pussy.

“Damn, Y/N, FUCK GIRL, look what you got this dick doing! Let me see all of it.”

Erik pulls out watching his jizz ooze out and on the couch. She rubbed her clit while pushing his cum out and Erik’s eyes rolled shut at the beautiful view.

“Lift that ass up...Turn the fuck around I need some more pussy..waited too long for this...watch how I handle you girl.”

Y/N turned around on the couch, whimpering when Erik’s hands came down on her ass hard to force her to move. As soon as she was on her stomach, Erik yanked her hips hard, pointing her ass into the air before slamming back inside of her pussy. She didn’t throw it back on him, too eager for him to do all of the work inside of her pussy.

“Just lay there and let me take care of this pussy…”

Erik kicked off his pants, his hands slapping her ass before they grabbed hold of her plush hips so that he could bang into her. Erik watched her face, wanting to see every single reaction his fat dick gave her. He had her for sure, especially with the way she drooled on the couch.

“Fuck yeah this pussy is good-

“Oooh-

“Yeah? You feel me digging this pussy out? Huh? This dick about to bust…”

She gasped when she felt Erik’s heavy balls hit her clit. He was pulling all the way out and slamming back inside of her with so much force her body would shake. She spaced out when he arched her back more, his hand reaching around to grab her neck from the front.

“You ain’t going nowhere,” He spoke harshly, “You were doing so good taking my dick, baby...DON'T disappoint me.”

She heard his warning, her arms trembling the more she stayed still for him to use her pussy.

“Think I’m playing with you? Huh?” Y/N moaned sharply, cumming on Erik’s dick again, “There you go… creaming all over this dick baby…”

“Erik,” She felt him swelling inside of her, “Erik I feel your dick! It’s stretching me!”

“That’s because I’m about to nut, stay just like that.”

“Oh, my-“

Her fat pussy lips gripped him tightly while his thick cum coated her walls again. Erik didn’t pull out, He kept thrusting until he was satisfied. She made little noises, her eyes droopy while his thick pipe covered in his white cum slowly left her pussy. His release had him shouting curse words to the ceiling in that studio. Erik’s hands left her hips, stepping away to allow her body to relax.

He was glad he waited to have her. It was even better than what he expected. She laid back on the sofa, staring down at her pussy covered with his cum, all swollen and thoroughly beat up.

“I can’t wait until tonight to see you, Y/N.”

She looked up at him through her lashes with her thighs still wide like she was silently telling him to get up in her some more. Bottom lip pulled tightly between her teeth, Y/N admired Erik’s cum-covered dick.

“I wanna suck your dick,” Y/N asked but she didn’t wait for a response. Y/N was on her knees crawling to him. His glistening dick rested on her lips before she opened wide with her tongue covered in saliva, her lips drawing him in. Breathing through her nose slowly, Y/N took her time sucking more and more of Erik’s dick.

“Shit, baby! Okay,” Erik licks his lips, “you tryna’ make me cum again, huh?”

Y/N didn’t respond to him she was all in: locked and ready to take off. The consistency in the way she sucked him even though she couldn’t take all of him...the crease in her brow and the way her head moved in sync with her warm, wet mouth made Erik moan.

“I NEED THIS...suck daddy like you mean it.”

Y/N tried to go lower but ended up gagging, her lips pulling back so she could breathe comfortably.

“Don't worry if you can’t manage as long as you're kneeling down you will practice until you do...Ooh that’s nasty,” Erik’s mouth fell open when she went down to show his balls some attention, “you better get sloppy on this dick and stop playing.”

“Yes, Daddy,” She knew that would make him growl when she said it.

“Got them brown sugar lips on my big black dick, mmmmm,” Erik started panting, his hands twisted in her braids, “damn...some beautiful sexy lips Unh I’m cumming baby...I’m cumming… Unh, get this nut baby…”

Erik found himself shooting off on her face because his hips jerked so frantically that his dick slipped out of her mouth. His cum hit her eyelids, trailing down to cover her cheek. Erik watched his cum drizzle down her neck, thinking about buying a ring for her after the monster head she just delivered. With an uneven breath, equally shocked by how much nut his balls produced, Y/N cleaned herself off with her fingers before doing the same to his dick.

“Daddy didn’t even have to tell you to clean me up, such a good girl,” Erik pulled Y/N up before grabbing her neck, his fingertips applying just the right amount of pressure before pulling her close so he could taste himself off of her tongue, “You’re coming with me, no need in going back home when you were coming to see me later anyway.”

“True,” She blushed before sucking on his bottom lip, “When we get back to your place...more fucking?”

“You’ve been teasing me all these months...it’s time you make up for that shit...yeah, we’re fucking, girl...still gotta get in this ass.”

“I’d try it with you...I’m a little nervous though-

“You’re gonna enjoy it so much, trust me,” Erik gives her a reassuring smile with his dimples, “get dressed, baby girl.”

Y/N slips away, walking to her vanity to get dressed while watching Erik do the same. Going back to his place this time around knowing that it’s going to involve more sex has beaming and while she rushed to get dressed. As he ties his Jordan’s Y/N thinks about the sex doll. She wouldn’t mind watching him fuck the doll while she sat in his recliner chair and fingered her pussy. She’d wait to ask him about it.

“You’re ready?”

Y/N looked around at the studio. She could come by tomorrow and clean up a little.

“I’m ready,” She says while running her hand through her braids, walking forward to grab Erik’s hand. He lead the way to the front of the studio, both of them inflamed and fighting the urge to fuck again.

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popculturebuffet · 3 years

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Top 20 Animated Episodes of 2020 Part 2 (#10-#1)

And we’re back.. The first part is HERE, which includes the first 10 and my thoughts on this past year in animation, so we can cut the long intro and get right into it. This is the best episodes this year had to offer in animation, and it’s , without meaning to, at least a third bojack horseman. On with the show.

10. I Am My Monster (Steven Universe Future) “We all had Steven when we needed him, but the only person who's never had Steven is Steven. He's always been there for us, so... how can we be there for him now?“ Oddly “The Future”, a finale I did really truly enjoy.. is not on this list. Really good episode, it’s just Future was easily one of Steven Univereses best season, tightining up the pacing without loosing what made the series feel special and really digging into some of more unhealthy aspects of steven’s life. And while the future is good and certanily the needed epilogue.. this episode is the climax, the cumilation of EVERYTHING Steven had done and gone though and something fans sadly saw coming and just had to simply watch, unable to help as Steven slowly lost himself. Previously on this list we saw him hit rock bottom and it only got worse: He went to home world, attacked white diamond due to his pent up trauma and once again ingored attempts to help him, this time from the diamonds and spinle, angrily refusing to listen to his own words she she sang Change at him. This only got worse in the briliant and sadly edged out of the list “Everything’s Fine’ A really damn painful episode where steven tries to assert he’s okay and act normal.. only he cant and he destroys everything around him, and even repeats pearl’s text trick from a single pale rose with a pained voice message to connie saying to help steven. But the pressure of the LONG overdue intervension and the fact it came too late.. means steven confsses his recent sins.. and instead of taking them for twhat they are, spur of the moment acts caused by a toxic influence and a fuckload of ptsd and unreseovled issues with white that while certanly not okay are symptoms of a larger issues takes it to mean “Im a fraud”.. and thus he horriingly corurpts. So here we are as Greg, Connie and the main gems all gap ein horor as Steven has corrputed himself, reduced to a monster whose not even malcious just.. sad.. so full of self loathing he can’t function and at risk of STAYING like that. And the relization hits hard.. and hits everyone who joins in hard. The auxilery crystal gems soon join but attempts from both groups to stop Steven do nothing. The diamonds arrive.. and not only are saddneed by what htey’ve doned but equally powerfless to stop him. Everyone breaks down, blaming themselves for not seeing this sooner and for speding YEARS piling their issue on the kids, everyone ready to give up as they loose the person they care about most.. except one. Connie proves to be the hero of the episode, rallying the others with the above, pointing out Steven would happily help them if he could.. and that’s the problem. He’s spent his whole life fixing other peoples problems and focusing on that.. but never had someone to be HIS Steven. Fighting him’s not going to work.. he needs to know he’s loved... in the end the final battle of the series is not some struggle of life and death.. but of love. What wins the day isn’t a fight, though our heroes various powers do come in hand to restrain steven.. but it’s all of them, one by one telling them they love him in easily the most tearjerking moment of the series, cumilating in connie softly playing a kiss on his nose... and it’s this that FIANLLY frees steven from his self made prison.. finally realizing h’es not alone and that no matter who or what he becomes.. his family loves and forgives him. While we REALLY needed the next episode to wrap things up after this swell of emtitions. this was the climax the series desrved: after spending 6 seasons trying to help everyone ELSE and fix their issues he never should’ve had to.. it’s eveyrone else who gladly pitches in to fix steven’s own issues, to help HIM when he’s at his lowest point like they’ve been, and make it so he can FINALLY heal and finally find himself once and for all. IT’s one of the finest episodes of the series and easily the best of future.

9. The Perfect House (Close Enough) “I’m this close to connecting garfield, TO JESUS” This one’s just really funny, charming and creative. Simple as that.. I could move on but eh i’m a wordy bastard. Once again we’re focused on Emily, this time as we find out an endearing hobby of hers: She likes visiting open houses and fantasizing about affording a better place she likely never will afford, one with trash can nooks, a kitchen and a living room that are fully seperate, and indivudal bins for tea and sugar... and when it’s pointed out she dosen’t drink tea it’s only because she has nowhere to put it. But after Josh and Candace get them thrown out, if adorably so, Emily is forced to face reality... i.e. Alex, in one of the series finest gags, in his underwear with conspiracy boards trying to connect garifled to jesus and having a jug of his urine around for some reason. Did I mention I love this weirdo because I do. Brigette is painting in the ktichen.. using her body as the canvas, though in a bikini because the show wasn’t streaming only yet. You’ll have to wait a season for possible boobs. Naturally this just stresses her out so she goes to visit more houses while Josh vows to buy a family bike, a large circular bike for the whole family, as an activity because of course he does and of COURSE he also has a recurring issue of being mocked by some random kid about not having one.

So she escapes and meets dave and caitlin, a husband whose family life is miserable and a child star who got emanicapted and they quickly form a psuedo family to look at open houses.. only to, as if to remind you what show your watching, instead end up in a tgif sitcom... and trapped in a styigian void, with only Emily desperate to get out. Also she’s been missing three days and Josh has some thoughts on that and goes after her. Naturally given she’s crashing in on her fake sitcom family, this oly has him seen as a plot element, and Emily’s attempt at cursing and everything she can , while hilarious fail.. but the climax is what makes the episode and what inches it slighlty above quack pack.. which itself was fucking awesome. Instead of FIGHTING the format... Emily is forced to play into it, and realizes a cheesy moment of emtional honesty is what’s needed. She apologizes to her fake family, saying their nice but she has to face the world and to josh and much like Donald, seroiusly this episode was made years ago and there’s no way in hell frank knew about it, she just needed an escape but it’s more healthy: instead of wishing for a life she never had Emily just wants a break from the life she does for five minutes. She’s happy where she is, with her loving husband, wonderful daughter, impulsive but still carring best friend.. and well okay maybe not Alex, there’s somethihng really wrong with him, but as much as I love the guy I admit he’s not for everyone. I’m also a borderline feral man covered in hair who wants people to know i’m smart. I get him.

IT’s this that sets her free.. and we get another amazing gag as Dave’s family shows up and Dave chooses the fantasy.. though instead of this being thorughly pogiant it’s just “classic dave”. COmplete with title sequence. And of course it ends on a family bike with Emily getting those tins from Josh. Their relationship.. is REALLY what makes both this show and this episode in paticular work. Here while Emily screws up, it STARTS innocently enough, simply faking being a family and spirals into tgif because while this show isn’t, possibly, in the regular show cinematic universe, it’s defintely in the same multiverse. She just wants some peace of mind from a chaotic life, but dosen’t resent her husband or anything.. he just frustrates her sometimes which is fair. But he’s never portrayed as an abusive asshat which you think would be a low bar to clear but.. you’d be suprised. Point is it’s a wonderfully weird and somehow still unique despite being one of three tgif parodies this year. Seriously that shit is a goldmine. It’s how Dashieel Driscoll got half a season out of full house and a good chunk of a very special epsiode as a whole out of it. Though a certain incident helped.

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Point is good show, jolly good show... and ew’ll be right back with the rest afte the cut

8. Agony of a Witch/Old Bodies, Young Souls (The Owl House) “You always thought you were better than me! That I could never Beat you at anything! “ “I AM Better than you!” “Then WHY WERE YOU SO EASY TO CURSE?!” The Owl House was a show I took WAY too long to catch up on after missing the second half of season 2.. minus Enchanting Grom Fright which I caught first run and we’ll get to that story shortly. Point is my procastnation did me dirty here as this show , which was already fantastic just got better and better, cumulating in this epic, heartdestroying, soul punching, beautifully animated finale that takes everything the show has built up thus far, blows it up in some places and uses it to beautifully end in others, leaving us with a new road for the future. So yeah naturally it’s been a long ride as one of Owl House’s strength.. is that no episode is filler. No really, each one has a purpose great or small in the larger narrative, and every major arc has been expertly paced and crafted, bringing us to this point. The only major arc or plot thread left out is Amity, and that’s honestly for the better. Make NO mistake, she’s a great character.. but like fellow great Donald Duck, she was left out because the episode had a LOT of emotional stuff going on, a lot of plot to fit in, and a lot to do and it’s simply better for her character and for the moment’s she’s bound to have in response to well.. everything happening here, to let it breathe next season rather than try to shove it into an already stuffed two episodes. But this episode is one long string of payoffs, and payoffs creating more setups: So all season Eda, our loveable witch, has been grappling with a curse that turns her into an owl beast, one that’s been getting worse as far back as the mid season finale Escape from the Palisman. She’s been needing more and more elixer to combat it, a harrowing parallel to some real world diseases: Sometimes your meds can only DO so much to combat something actively killing you.. thankfully this time.. not speaking from personal experince. And Luz finds out soon into the episode as Eda makes a cloak of witches wool, which can deflect powerful spells, to protect herself.. only to black out and go owl just as she’s saying she’s fine. Like most parents would Eda hid just how bad things have gotten and it’s gone from needing just one bottle of elixer to needing their entire suply, and even that barely worked. Despite her mentor’s assurances, Luz is now PAINFULLY aware her mentor is on borrowoed time... not helped by the fact the coven attacked earlier that morning and she finds out by finding hooty playing tea party with them, meaning Eda is outgunned, outmanned and while Lilith failed, again.. the emperor can now easily find her himself and send whoever he wnats and however many people he wants to fetch her.. and Eda can’t use too much of her magic or else. So while Eda and King, touched by how much Luz has changed them, decide to throw a suprise party with King making a big cake to jump out of and Eda using witches wool she intended for herself to make her a cape. Meanwhile as you’d expect Luz.. is plotting a dangerous and life threatning mission: with a field trip to the Emperor’s Coven that day, one she was going to sit out because you know they hate her second mom for dogmatic and vile reasons the episode fleshes out, she finds out they have an artifact called the healing hat that can seemingly heal anything. So she does what Luz does and comes up with an impulsive plan to heist the thing.. but for once her impuslivness isn’t played for laughs. Her mother figure is slowly sucumbing to a fate worse than death, for once instead of just acting rashly because Luz.. she’s doing so because she KNOWS, that she has no other choice. Nothing else in sight and she’s smart enough to know that if Eda had a cure she’d of told Luz about it. Even if it was dangerous or required a sacrifice or something Eda would’ve just left that part out. But the trip serves a few other purposes besides getting Luz where she needs to be for the plot that makes it work: it elaborates on just what the emperor’s coven is like and WHY Emperor Belos gets away with everything: He claims to speak for the titan, the giant dead monster whose body makes up the boiling isles and who, as Luz has discovered, is the source of the magic there. So when he bloodily, I mean it’ sa kid show so they dont’ say so but given how violent this one is i’m asssuming bloody, took power, he claimed they were doing magic wrong, killed any hertiics and set up the rigid coven system. It explains just WHY the boiling isles limits themselves, gives the whole thing a creepy dogmatic religion vibe.. something that i’m REALLY suprised disney let them get away with as they had to fight for gays in the series.. but at the same time shouldn’t be because hunchback of notre dame exists and Soul , released the same year, was a big gamble against the bible belt. So their not afriad of religious groups.. but they ARE afraid of homophobic groups.. which have a lot of overlap.

Point is it’s a good storytelling device.. and cathartic given i’ve been playing Fire Emblem: Three Houses as I finally bought it with some christmas money. Good game, probably will talk about it in the future, not the point here.

The point is that the visit gives us some worldbuilding that helps show just how much of a threat the coven is and why their so intent on capturing Eda. We also finally meet belos, god emperor and man tired of Lillith’s shit and giving her till twilight to get Eda.. or presumibly die. I mean he dosen’t say it but he sure is implying it as loud as he can. That’s when things go pear shaped for Luz who finds the hat.. and LIlith who has found her barganing chip to lure Eda to her, which works as well as you’d expect and leads to the best figh tin the series thus far and one of , if not it’s best scene; A duel between edith and lilith. And while they fought back in Covention this time it’s not a petty squabble between siblings masquerading as one trying to capture the other.. it’s fight NEITHER can afford to loose. Eda can’t loose her protege and Lilith will loose everything, dying at best being cast out of the coven at worst, if she fails not to mention loosing what she feels is her only chance at saving her sister. But it’s also VERY clear Lilith is groosly outmatched, and while no slouch herself Eda’s constant bragging about being “the most powerful witch on the boiling isles”.. is entirely backed up. Lilith barely is able to hold herself and only gets ahead by using a child as a shiled, going even lower than her sister. However the stress of this, the build of having been the older sister of someone who constantly outshined her then turned entirely against her, finally causes lilith to snap.. and reveal the curse is her fault. Cissy Jones delivery here.. is jsut perfect, showing a mixture of rage and pain, showing that she’s spent YEARS hiding this, years resenting her sister for constnatly being better desptie working harder and doing the right thigns. Even when she’s trying to HELP Eda, genuinely trying to undo her mistake as we find out and as we’ve seen genuinely sees the emperor as the wise and benevlolent god he portrays himself as.. she can’t let it go. SHe can’t see past her own bitterness to see her sister is right and if she could just let this go and work on Eda’s terms instead of forcing Eda into her world, then maybe it wouldn’t of gotten this bad. Maybe she could’ve told her.

Eda takes it about as well as you’d expect, and Lilith.. uses this to threaten luz’s life and force eda to use up her magic to save her, leading to the series most heartbreaking moment and Wendy Mallick’s best acting so far as she bids her appretnince a tearful farewell. Luz RIGHTFULLY and angrily lashes out at lilith calling her a monster while Lilith takes Eda and urges luz to go home... and after a tearful ending with king realizing something’s deeply wrong.

So thus next episode after a history lesson from king and some suprisinging caution as he KNOWS what Luz is up against.. Luz still decides she dosne’t care. Eda’s sacrificed herself, to Luz it’s her fault she’s in this which while KINDA accurate missues some fine points such as her sister’s stubborness or the fact had lilith not shown up she could’ve taken the hat. And the fact LIlith saying the hat was junk was pretty unreliable. What i’m saying is maybe the child shoudln’t blame herself for being kidnapped while genuinely tring to reach the same goal.

But Lilith soon learns to her horror her sister was right. While Belos restores Eda’ss sentience even fully owled.. he has no intrest in helping her, eveyr intrest in publicly petrifying her, and not even the slightest hint of remorse at betraying lilith this deeply. After all her faith in the man.. Belos spat in her face and told her to like it. Meanwhile Luz goes on the warpath, and we see just how far she’s come.. and WHY Belos is probably so restrictive with magic and put it on such a tight leash: we see that with her natural power and just a handful of spells, the four she’s pciked up over the season, she easily curbstomps the conformotrium staff, gets to Eda fairly easily.. and fines sshe can’t free her and eda wants the door destroyed so whatever Belos wants with it, he can’t have it. Luz heads home, ready to destroy the door.. onlyt of ind two things. her magic dosen’t work there.. and Lilith followed her and grabbed king. After a breif fight and Luz angrily and rightously confroting the asshole, wish she was in Eda’s place.. Lilith admits luz’s right and gives her backstory: That her insecurity was so great that on the day before a duel with Eda to determine who got into the emperoror’s coven, she curfsed her own sister, with no idea it’d last this long or get this bad. And with no idea Eda had lost intrest in it and WILLINGLY gave her sister teh spot.. It’s very clear despite her masssive flaws that will need to be adressed.. lilith never stopped caring about her sister, and it took all this to make her realize that trying to fix the mistake on HER terms without including her sister.. instead has almost cost her it. So Luz and King relucntnatly take her help, though the other two are quickly capatured when theyt ry to get to hte exceution platform and thrown in the cage with Eda.. which dosne’t help the coven’s reputation as gus and willow try to make a case for Eda. Meanwhile we get the SECOND best fight of the series as Luz challenges Bellows.. and it’s UTTERLY chillling and while he’s had scenes before this it’s here we get the true scope of who he is ..and that like eda the god complex is something he can back up. Whlie Luz proves just how strong she’s gotten by keeping up with him it’s barely, and it’s clear from the moment go, and one of the series best shots, with Belos creeply materlizing behind her before announcing “sure, i’ll play” that this is a game. She’s no challenge to him and he simply wants to see waht she can do and is mildly impressed if a tad annoyed at her actually damaging his mask. But with Eda, King and Lilith’s lives in the ballance the only way Luz can save htem.. is to give him waht he wants.

Thing is, just like Lilith, just like everyone has, good an dbad all season.... Belos undereesitmated luz.. who left fire runes on the door, willnig to sacrifice ever seeing her mom again if it meant keeping him away from her. While he has no invasion planned whatever it is CANNOT be good. Luz saves them, and Eda flies them off with Belos saying the titan dismissed them. Also that Belos has a big penis.. super huge, size of a tractor that one. Yeah that’s the ticket.

But we get a happyish ending as LIlith does what she should’ve done a long time ago and apologizes, and Eda starts to fogive her, brought on by King earlier standing up to her as whle he’s not happy with her either, he realizes from her story she’s not a bad person.. just a very messed up one who couldn’t own up to her mistakes. One who belivied in the wrong person to fix her problem and finally takes repsonsiblity and part of the curse into her. So with the sequel hook of Eda having lost her internal magic power but still being able to use glyph’s like luz, we also find out the Emperor has the door and a mysterious masked minon,.. who i’m fairly certain isn’t amity only because it’s too obvious. This is simply how you end a season: It’s engaging, heartbreaking, well animated and pays off EVEYRHTING so far while setting up the season to come. It’s going to be a LONG wait till next time, mid-this year.. but I can wait. The high from this one’s going to last a while.

7. Good Damage (Bojack Horseman) “ That means that all the damage I got isn't good damage. It's just damage. I have gotten nothing out of it and all those years I was miserable was for nothing. I could have been happy this whole time and written books about girl detectives and been cheerful and popular and had good parents, is that what you're saying? What was it all for?! “

Bojack Horseman is one of the best shows of the last decade, and an important one to me. it was the first one I watched when we switched to all streaming. I really related to Bojack and his struggles with depresion and self loathing.. which backfired given he’s a much worse person than me and while I could relate, I also compared myself too much to a character who in retrospect is both far worse and has FAR MORE issues than I do and diffrent ones at that outside of the depression and self hatred. The point i’m framing is that the series and I have a complicated relationship and that coupled with how bad 2020 was meant it took until a few days ago to finally finish it, almost a year later. But I cannot deny how good the show is: it has faults, a bit of reptititon in some character arcs, casting a white woman as a Vietnamize-American woman (something both Ralph Paul Waskerberg and Alison Brie have apologized for to their credit), and .. I can’t think of a last one. They never brought Ralph back? Yeah let’s go with that one what the fuck there. So I felt I owed the show one last round and it payed off as the final stretch, while easily the hardest to get through due to covering the collapse of Bojack’s life, is easily one of it’s best.

But before the fall, we get Good Damage, which instead of focusing on BoJack focuses on Diane, said asian woman voiced by a white lady, neurotic writer and Bojack’s best friend, who has moved to Chicago to be with her boyfriend guy, a chill, charasmatic and likeable buffalo cameraman. Things are going better than they ever have: she’s in a supportive relationship and thanks to her antidipresenants, while still her loveably neurotic self, is now not obessing over shit as much and is solving her problems with applomb. Even the weight gain from her meds, which she dreaded in the previous half of the season.. has insteead only made her look healthier and happier, and more beautiful than ever.

The only problem is she can’t write her long promised Memoir, which Princess Carlolyn, her former boss, agent and loveable pink cat and single mother, has promised to a lot of celebrities. She TRIES, she puts lots of work into it, keeps trying to sit there but nothing comes out. And what makes the episode truly great is how this is presented. Bojack is no stranger to beautiful, visually diverse episodes, Stupid Peace of Shit being a notable example and one similar to this one but uniquely great in it’s own way, but this one is easly the bes,t using a squiggly crude style to show just how chaotic and uncomfortable diane is and how stuck she is. She’s TRYING, but she just can’t make her life’s story into anything GOOD, she can’t get the words out which as someone whose had reams of projects I never startd, even to this day and who has genuine trouble writing fiction.... I related to this like all hell. But even people who have never had an intrest in writng can just get the feeling thanks to the wonderful writing and animation, from cameos by the rest of the cast to Diane’s father showing up as a goblin to the word boxes showing what she’s writtne it’s just a treat. But what centers this amazing visual represtnation is Diane’s internal struggles as an encounter with a rude sales person leads her off on a tangent..and to Ivy Tran, a teen detective whose upbeat, optimstic, and in a great bit outlines who she is in jsut the right amount, and solves mysteries in a food court. It’s a genuinely good idea, one I honestly think could support it’s own series... seriously get on that Ralph-Bob. Get on that. Point is it’s good.. but Diane’s so hung up on what she SHOULD be making, she can’t see what’s right in front of her, despite guy saying the passages are good. Things come to a head when Diane makes a huge mistake and goes off her meds.. which from experince never ends well: for the entire episode she’s been under the impression she can’t write because of them.. only to be proven HORRIFYINGLY wrong. It’s a VERY necessary aseop: that your medication will always be with you and that going off it suddenly, or blaming it for writers block not only isn’t true but is DANGEROUS. Diane spirals, cries and her writing gets dark and full of self hate. It’s then Guy proves just how fucking majestic he is: he figures out what’s going on after she tells him, and helps her get to bed so she can rest, puke whatever she needs and they’ll talk about things after she takes her meds again and gets her head on straight, when she’s in a good place to do so. As someone with mental illness.. ti’s nice to see a character who not only supports someone fully, but knows how to handle it. Instead of a shitty third act breakup like many shows would do guy stands by her. He does however step SLIGHTLY over the line, if iwth good intentions and reason and send Princess Carolyn the Ivy Tran pages, because as he puts it he made an executive decision.. and when Diane is a bit annoyed by that as it does sound a tad douchey, he rightly points out she was in a really bad hole of a place, stuck in a loop doign something that even before going off her meds was clearly hurting her and going nowhere, and needed SOMETHING to snap her out of it, and did so not to hurt her or because he thought he knkew better or , like her ex husband, because he was oblvious to her needs; he did it because it was the hard but necessary thing to get her to seee she had something special and that she dosen’t have to constnatly tear herself up by diving into past traumas because of some internal obligation.

Naturally Diane dosen’t take it despite Princess Carolyn not only being impressed but PREFERRING the ivy pages, as she was genuinely unaware Diane had something so happy and charming in her. While Diane is worried about it when the two end up meeting in person, we soon find out why: If all the damage she went through wasn’t “good” damage, things she could writ eabout and use later.. what was it for? Could she of just been happy this whole time? Did she waste her life. And in a rare moment betwen the two PC helps Diane walk it back, explaning that she can do what she always wanted: write something that makes someone like her feel not alone. That she dosen’t HAVE to make her life story into something complicated, just make what makes her and other people happy. Something PC’s daughter could enjoy one day. So Diane finally accepts that maybe there’s something else for her.. and then we get a segue into the next episode with bojack having a panic attack and pasing out but that episode, good as it was didn’t make it so moving on. We also check in with Penny, the daughter of an old friend of bojacks who he nearly slept with and is stil haunted both by the decision and a drunken later visit to apologize... which isn’t helped remotely when max and page, two reporters inovlved in teh subplot that tears bojack’s life apart, start hounding her. While they have good intentions, exposing Bojack’s connection to Sarah Lynn’s death, the two’s methods still come off as creepy, following a, at this point , 21 year old girl whose been through ENOUGH home. While the two aren’t terrible people their actions.. are.. while getting hte story ismprotant is it truly worth genuinely harming this person. And penny wonders if she SHOULD air her story.. she ends up not.. but only because her mother, while lettiner he decide, poitns out it may not be worth all the pressure and possible trauma it digs up,especially since Bojack is getting what he deserved anyway. IT’s a decent subplot tha tties up a loose end but really makes our journalist characters feel like assholes for again, basically stalking and harassing a young woman who didn’t want to rehash the worst moment of her life. Otherwise top notch stuff.

6. Heart (Parts 1 and 2) (She Ra and the Princesses of Power) “Don't you get it? I love you! I always have! So please, just this once... STAY! Stay. “

Now we get to the gays winning.. and to one of the best series finale in recent memory. And given the other two titanic shows ending, one of which we’ll get to’s ending in a moment, last year, it’s a huge compliment. Heart is how you end a space opera... with big wonderful speeches, great payoff, a huge climax.. and a beautiful cathartic kiss paying off the relationship at the heart of the series that ends up saving the universe. So let’s just go ahead and crack open that pinata: The kiss.. was easily one of the best moments of animation this year and, at a time when the quarantine was starting, misery was spreading, and things looked pretty damn bad, having a major animated show, one of the biggest of the last few years, climax with an emotional moment between two women, one the series had been setting up since day 1... it was a huge step foward for gay representation in children’s animation, and warmed my big bi heart. And it’s not just good because of that: the fact it’s a giant pile of representation is wonderous, but it’s because it’s also well baked into the show. This is the conclusion of both their character arcs: Catra finally realizes Adora will not abandon her and her leaving the Horde was not choosing them over her.. it was simply doing the right thing. So instead of running or trying to escape she’s grown enough to fight for what she wants and fight for a future with Adora. Adora meanwhile finally overcomes her martyer complex, her determination, especially after Angela’s death, to make sure no one else is gone and she’s the only one that suffers and looses. To make sure there’s nothing else. It’s Catra’s confesssion that FINALLY gets it through her thick skull that she dosen’t have to be alone or bear anything alone.. she’ll always have someone with her to do that.. and even before Catra.. she’s always had friends for that. She dosen’t have to be alone. So the two embrace and it’s fucking beautiful..and gives adora the full power of the doomsday device they went to shutdown in the first place, restoring the planet.. and allowing her to destroy horde prime’s fucking soul. I just want to reiterate that because it understandably got lost in the shuffle of the gays winning, but our heroine fucking tears out the main villian’s soul.. and it is SO damn satisfying given what a truly repulsive , irredemible, asshat Prime was. So the two finally get a future together, a chance to build and to stop letting the past define them. It’s wide open. But while that alone would probably net it on this list but it’s damn good otherwise, an epic final struggle between our heroes and the horde for the fate of not just their planet but ALL of htem as Prime prepares to finally wipe everything else out in egomanical genocide. There are just.. tons of awesome moments in this one: Bow and Glimmer’s suprising but welcome love confession, Seahawk annoying mermista into fighting her chip, the people of etheria fighting back.. and the reason they do is easily the second best moment of the episode. With the chips down, not literally, and things looking bleak Bow hyjacks Prime’s egoamnacial hologram.. and broadcasts for everyone to fight, to fight back, and to END THIS. After spending most of the series as the one trying to keep his friends together, the glue of everyone.. it’s bow’s heart, courage, and voice, the one that lead his friends through some rough times and severed as reason when they needed it most wether they listned or not.. that frees the world and with Entrapta turns the tide at long last. It’s just a hell of a moment. And the only other moment equaling it is Hordak freeing himself and deciding he is his own man, he made himself tha tway for better and worst and kills prime, at least before adora finsihes the job with the badass “I am HORDAK and I DEFY your will. “ It’s just a wonderful, epic finale that pays off most of the shows major arcs, gives our heroes a MUCH deserved happy ending after spending their lives at war, and let it be said one last time, gave gay representation in children’s cartoon one hell of a win.

5. Nice While it Lasted (Bojack Horseman)

“ No, I need to tell you... thank you... and... it's going to be okay... and... I'm sorry... and... thank you... “

Back to back finales here and honestly both are REALLY close in quality, both satisfyingly paying off their series. But both take equal and opposite routes: Heart is an epic finale in scope size and impact... while Nice While it Lasted is a very stripped down character piece: there are other characters in the background but after the intro the only voiced characters in each segment are Bojack and one of the main cast, each one both showing how much said relationship has evolved since the show began, and giving Bojack time to reflect on his possible future. I say possible because one of Nice While it Lasted’s best aspects it that there’s no real concrete ending for Bojack. Ther’es still closure: after his life emploded and he nearly died, more on that in a bit, Bojack ended up in prison, offically for breaking and entering but unoffically for all the shitty things he did with him glumly accepting it. So one year later he’s out thanks to Princess Carolyn for her wedding, sober again thanks to prison and even started his own acting class at the prison he’s geninley invested in, inteding to continue it once he gets out. But otherwise.. his future’s in flux. HE’s sober for now, but he’s painfully aware that could change again, his friends while, with one excpetion, still having a place for him in their lives, have moved on, and his career is on the upswing again despite being a pariah a year ago because as I mentioned earlier and as PC brilliantly puts it

So he could become a better man, get his career back, make amends for what he did and stay sober.. or backslide and fall down into the same traps he always has. It plays into an aseop the series has always preached: There are no real endings, life just goes on. Even for the rest of the cast hteir lives aren’t over.. their just in a good place.. maybe bojack will, maybe he won’t. Tha’ts up to the indvidual viewer and I like that. While ambgious endings can be frustrating and I get while some preferred the more concrete if still somewhat ambgious ending of a view from halfway down, I feel this fits the series better: Bojack, like the end of every season is moving on to something new, but this time we don’t know what, and that’s okay. IT’s time for us to move on. Well okay not from this entry as each vingette deserves some praise: Our first has Mr. Peanutbutter pick up Bojack from prison, and even get him a new suit.. and then another one offscreen because predictably for his life BOjack got meatball all over it. He also calms our hero down when he wants to go back to jail, letting him know it’s okay and he’ll be there for him.. unless his friend Erica shows up but what are the odds... 1:1. But what’s nice about it is while Bojack still makes jabs, it’s clear he’s gone from truly hating and resenting PB for being the betterversion of him.. to truly seeing the guy as one of his best friends, his jabs having gone from hurtful and bitter to wry and warranted. I mean they were warranted a lot back then too he’s just a lot softer about them.

At the wedding Todd and Bojack finally reach some form of understanding after years of awkwardness, the two having reconclied but not being really remotely close or in each other’s lives hardly anymore after Todd’s understandable blow up at Bojack in “It’s You”. Here Todd has Bojack rush him to the beach to cary him on his shoulders.. to watch fireworks because he could tell he was overhwelmed, the two having found a rhtym again, with, like with mr peanutbutter, Bojacks jabs being a lot friendler and Todd having a respect for his own needs while actually being present for bojack instead of ignorant of how bad things were like he was at the start. He even helps BOjack see even if he DOES replase.. he can get right back on the horse, couldn’t resist that one sue me, and as the hokey pokey says turn himself around.

After, in one of the best payoffs of the series, finally trying Hondedew and finding it’s not so bad, Bojack dances with PC, admittingh e half hoped he’d have to help her go thorugh with it before the two run through the scenario, and PC expresses some honest fears with bojack helping her showing how the two hav egone from a horribly stiffing relationship.. to two close friends who are probably stuck with one another for life. Sunk costs and all that. And if bojack does want to act again she knwos some people. But for now PC finally really has everything she ever wanted:: A daughter, and a loving husband in judah.

Finally we have the most painful of the group because of course the Bojack finale wouldn’t be all sugar and would have to punch us in the gut. Bojack finds Diane again who hasn’t talked to him.. because he called her the night of his near death/sucidide and due to putting the blame on her due to being high out of his mind, made her feel like it was his fault during the 7 hours she could reach no one and thought he was dead. Diane is hurt, feeling betrayed that bojack promsied he’d be fine then possibly left her with the pain of his death on her concious forever. Thankfully she’s doing fine, as she’s now married guy and Ivy Tran is a huge success and probably a series now.. but it’s abudnantly clear her friendship with Bojack is over.. but even this bittersweet, and necessary, seperation, as Diane has moved past LA and Bojack needs to stop relying on her and stand on his own two hooves, still warms the heart as she thanks him and lets him know i’tll be okay, and endugles him in telling her one last story, a rathe rfunny one about prison movie night bfore the series ends on the melancholy and apporriate song mr blue as the two gaze out and they see each other and we see them for the last time.

4 The Wasteland (Infinity Train)

“I'm as good as dead, and if my last act is to bring you with me, sliver, I can't imagine a better way to go!” “Well, I can! “

So from a bittersweet ending to holy shit that’s depressing, we have our only entry from Infnity Train on the list. That’s not to say the series did bad this year. Season 2 was easily the series finest hour, taking the framework from season 1 and crafting a gripping story of a teenage mirror person who just wanted to live without assholes trying to kill her for what she fundementally IS, and be recognized as a person, with the help of a magical deer and a more optimstic teen grappling with his peer pressure issues. The series was still undoubtly silly with a parasite voiced by Bill Corbett, wonderfully so, and again a magical deer named Alan Dracula, long may he reign, it simply deconstructed the nature of the train and thus opened up the floodgates. By giving us a denzin who, after years of being someone’s reflection in both senses of the word, just wanted to live and how that clashed with the train and the racist assholes she met alnong the way, from the ones who wouldnt’ stop trying to kill her.. to humans who considered her as nothing more than a plaything at best and something to get rid of at worst. While Season 3 was not bad, if a bit way too strcuturally messy and trying to do too much at once, Season 2 still handled the same issues but in a much tighter frame storywise. And that’s why only one episode made it: Most of the episodes, espicially the later ones, are pieces of a large whole, with the show being heavily seralized. Which while a great approach intended for streaming, also means it was hard to find a chapter that worked that well on it’s own, steven universe future had similar issues. But I did and the wasteland is easily the darkest, harshest and most intresting episode out of the batch. The episode opens at MT’s darkest hour: The apex told the mirror police where she is, Jesse is gone, and MT is now running for her life from the sadstic assshole and his spinless partner who want her dead just for existing.. gee can’t imagine why a bunch of assholes refusing ot acknolwedge other peoples opinons, rights or even existance was a big topic last year.. or this year.

So while Mace, the main mirror cop, manages to handcuff her MT manages to throw him under the train. THe result is her trying to escape the train by wondering i’ts vast desert, forced to drag Mace along as he taunts her, bleeding out slowly from you know being bisected by a train. It’s a really moody peace as Mace mock’s mt’s dreams of escape and justify’s his own selling out, while MT pokes holes in that: he was so desperate to not nonexist.. he’s willing to kill others who just want the same. IT’s a damn hard watch but fuck if i’ts not compelling.

And the climax is what makes it. MT finds out she can’t leave the bounds of the wasteland, as it only projects so far and after escaping the ghoms ends up back on the train, with Mace, not long fo rthis world trying to kill her.. so we get a 13-14 year old GRINDING HER HORRIFYING ABUSER UNDER A TRAIN WHEEL. Just jesus.. I mean I kind of get HBO Max’s point that MAYBE this is a bit much for kids. I mean i’ve seen other really dark stuff but holy fuck a man died.. and we see his blood splatter. But it’s this horrible, harsh moment that makes the episode.. as is MT”s reaction.. not one of triumph.. but of exaustion and horror at what she’s done, before steadying herself to prove him wrong. A hard one to write about but damn it was good.

3. Enchanting Grom Fright (The Owl House) “Dear Luz, will you go to Grom with me- Amity” Now we THANKFULLY get to something lighter: the gays winning.. again. Coming out during pride month, phrasing, and only a month after the she ra finale we got this delightful episode. As I said earlier I watched this one first run: while I was super behind, I couldn’t resisit to the point I watched it before that week’s amphibia. I was that curious what was going to happen. See as i’ve given out about quite a lot.. and I mean a LOT, Disney dosen’t have the best track record with gay representation: they don’t do horrible sterotypes or anything.. but they also don’t do much of anything for the most part. Alex Hirsch has outright spoke about how much he had to fight just to get Blubbs and Durland firmly together in the finale, and how the symbols for the love god were widdled down to just male and female. And around the time this episode came Disney was coming out of a REALLY bad batch of pr stunt gay representation: They made a big deal about the first gay x in an x having gay characters in avengers endgame, star wars: Deep Hurting and onward.. but these were cameos AT BEST, with the endgame one being so minor I genuinely didn’t realize the character was talking about dating a man and only found out afterwords. Sure Ducktales had gay dads, which is awesome and always will be.. but none of the major cast was allowed to be openly gay. I mean we know webby and lena are gay but hell if disney would allow that. But miracoulsy.. shockingly and wonderfully.. Disney DID mange to finally just say fuck it and let some big gay rep in, something so obvious it can’t be ignored and that actually features the main character and one of the most major supporting characters. And what do you know, the good press and pats on the back outweighed the bad. It’s almost if giving up homophobic markets in exchange for doing the right thing.. is a GOOD thing while also being profable. Who’d a thunk. Point is via sheer perstiance, Owl House creator Dana Terrance got to not only make her lead bi, which Terrance herself is, but have her love intrest be a girl. And I find it genuinely wonderful that gay, bi, pan and what have you children can watch this and say “tha’ts me and this is okay”. But even minus Owl House saying gay rights.. the episode is just REALLY good and part of it is who it focuses on. Amity easily has the most character devleopment out of the cast going from someone who walls herself off from everyone, revels in her superiority.. to slowly opening up to heroine Luz, realizing Luz is not a bad person and that Amity herself dosen’t have to be, and right before this starting the road to patching things up with her former best friend willow. Allt hrough this said friendship had been prettty, prettyy, prettyyy gay. And that’s wonderful obviously, but part of why I watched this was while I HOPED they’d get to be couple.. I wasn’t convinced since see a fucking bove. But I was happy to realize that oh my god I was wrong, the gays won all along.

So with Amity a better person she’s naturally syampthetic when sh’es put front and center at hexside’s prom equvilent which while having a dance, gromprosals and a disco ball tha’ts also a sentient being, becuase boiling isles, it also has the queen or king forced to fight a horrifying monster that manfiests as your greatest fear. And, as we find out towards the end.. Amity’s is being rejected by Luz, having her love letter, which she fails to deliver due to running into luz.. and co (which is my faviroite gag of the episode and the adorable smiles gus and willow give in response are what make it). And . it makes sense. When you stop and think about it.. Luz is the best thing in her life. She got her to change as a person, genuinely cares about and adores her, just wants to be her friend and thinks the world of her. Given her siblings, while trying to be better, are two disaster bisexuals who just stopped a lifetime of untietonally harsh bullying and her parents are controlling asshats who made her abandon her best friend at a young age and she sees LILITH as a mother figure, just let that sink in given a few entires back.. yeah.. no wonder sh’es utterly terrified of rejection. Poor baby.

Of course WE know Luz wouldn’t. Luz may be many things, including oblvioius to thte freaking obvoius as this story line has revealed, but shes not cruel and even if she said no, which I higlhly doubt she would, she woudln’t be a dick about it. But being surrounded by cruel assholes for some time has made Amity a bit paranoid so Luz volunteers to sub in to both genuinely help her friend.. and to prove to eda she can do this. Eda is also chaperoning. and looks neat in a suit, while King and Gus get a wonderful b plot of mcing the dance with the egotisticl king having issues with stage fright. I will get more into that when I review the episode proper, come back in a month for that. But yeah while Luz does well when the time comes, and while sadly not wearing her otter suit does wear a wonderful tuxedo with a tutu.. she has her own repressed issues to adress as Grom takes the form of her mother, as Luz has been nursing guilt over not telling her the truth about what’s going on. Luz runs, and Amity ends up facing her fear to save her crush and the two get a wonderfully romantic, and desturctive dance together as they face hteir fear, untie as one and kill that motherfucker... well okay i’m not sure grom can die but it’s gone for now. The dance sequence.. is easily one of the best scene’s all year, beauituflly animated and painstakingly planned out, with wonderful music.. it’s just awesome and what takes the episode ove rthe top, with the two perfeclty in synch as they take grom out in less than a minute. Also king become prom king and queen, he is best of both as Luz’s own personal issues put a damper on things. Also someone’s been writing her mom.

Overall just a perfect episoe and a perfectly gay episode of one of the best shows going right now. Speaking of a perfect episode of one of the best shows going right now, tha’ts also on disney.

2. Escape From the Impossibin! (Ducktales) ”We have to keep them safe” “But not like this!” So from some emotinal torment mixed with some lovely shipping, we get a whole buttload of emotional anguish but with a robotic scrooge and the time loop room and the time loop room and the time loop room, and time l...

As I said in part 1, Season 3 is easily Ducktales best so far, having far better pacing, character ballance and bolder and more intresting stories than ever before. While the first two seasons are still excellent, this one has taken everything great and honed it and no episode shows off just how great this season is than this one. This one takes place in the fallout of “Let’s Get Dangerous!”, with the family dealing with finding out FOWL”s not only still alive, but is run by Bradford, head of scrooge’s board of directors former shush agent as we’d find out later, and asshole, who knows all their secrets. And given Scrooge is mildly paranoid on a good day and Beakly is extremley paranoid on her best day, it’s done a number on both as they’ve split the family minus launchpad, who just had a whole episode so fair enough, up: Scrooge has taken Della and Louie, wiht their see all the angels schtick, to test out his new security, while Beakly and Donald are securing the house while Beakly has webby throughly test the boys. Neither side goes well. The bin ends up locking our heroes out due to Scrooge’s password being changed, and forcing them to work past it. Louie rises to the challenge, as does della.. but as they beat a robot versoin of scrooge, because of course the final test would be a robot version of scrooge, Scrooge is instead of triumphant at not being dead, incredibly depressed and furious. Because when told he’s scrooge mcduck he tellingly replies “AND WHAT IF THAT’S NTO ENOUGH’. For once.. Scrooge is SCARED, up against someone who knows his every move and is one step ahead, iti’s how it’s always been, no matter what he’ll do, he’ll always loose and Bradford will always win. I REALLY need to watch spies are forever, point is he’s scared and Bradford PROVING the point by revealing he was behind it and taking over the robot dosen’t help. Our heroes win though in a damn impressive action sequence, but as it turns out.. it was just a distraction.. but we’llg et back to that. The other plot though is whyt his is so high. While the first plot is a fun romp with deep eomtional consequences.. the second plot is decidly far darker.. it still has some good bits as webby terorizes the boys and easily one of the best in the season when she horrifying imitates dewey, but its’ only when she does finally attack she realizes she’s taken it way toof ar. She’s terrorized her brothers, caused huey to break his leg and then turn her away when she tries to help.. all she’s done is turn them AGAINST each other and they can’t win this way. Beakly strongly disagrees and clealry lost in her own paranoia and fear, prepares to attack huey.. and thus Webby steps in... leading to one fo the most heartbreaking and tense fights in the series as grandmother and grandaughter fight one on one but both are outmatched.. but Huey and Dewey, despite everything, refuse not to help their sister and help pull webby up, with Webby panickidly realizing something’s VERY wrong and her granny usually isn’t like this when sparring... and is also chasing them. This leads to the roof, in a rainstorm no less, and Webby relcutnatnly ready to fight even though she clearly knows she both can’t win.. and dosen’t want to anymore. Despite her wilingless to scrap, fight and train.. Webby dosen’t WANT to hurt her granny she just wants to help her. Thankfully, the boys attempt to stop this, while failing horribly, catches donald’s attention as he catches them, ntocies what’s going on and furiously refuses to let this go on. While Beakly tries to ignore it and fight..s he instead slips and despite everything, the rest of the group rescue her, with Webby impressing on her grandmother that they aren’t fowl. They wont’ win acting like them and tearing each other apart.. they need to be the family they are. But if all that wasn’t enough turns out.. yeah, Bradford’s thing was a distraction and with the rest of the group distracted with Beakly, that meant his plan went off without a hitch: all the missing mysteries have been taken by FOWL, in a masterstorke that ties both plots together and brings what seemed like isolated adventures on their own in a tagnetally related plot into the fore. Everything so far has built up to this.. and despite the loss.. the family, having been through a dark night of the soul, is ready to fight back. They want the rest of the mysteries? Their going to have to fight clan mcduck in their elment. And it’s been glorious so far. A tense, well paced, hard hitting episode, this one’s a winner. and almost got #1.. ALMOST. But as much as I tried to not go with the obvious chocie, the one with tons of press and praise and that’s graced tons of best of lists... I had to go with what was honestly the best. So...

1. The View from Halfway Down (BoJack Horseman) “Oh BoJack, there is no other side. This is it. “ This episode was my main reason for catching up with the series and finishing it off once and for all. Awash with praise and hype I was curious about this one.. and my curiosity paid off. This is easily one of if not hte best episodes Bojack put out in it’s storied run: it’s creative, impossible to look away from and devistating: in short it’s the show in a nutshell.. and it’s a hell of a view.

Previously as mentioned before Bojack’s life blew up and he lost just about everything, from his friends, though as the finale bared out only one of them stayed away for good and for good reason, his only family in hollyhock, his house, even horsin around. He had nothing left.. so high on drugs and in his old house he passed out at the end of last episode.. and we wake up here with a recurring dream as Bojack has a dinner party at his mother’s house, another wonderful performance from Wendy Mallick. Everyone there is someone Bojack knew who died: his former best friend he betrayed Herb, Sarah Lynn his former child co start turned washed up 30 something he let die, Courdory, a co star who died trying to get off david caradine style, Crackerjacke, the uncle he never knew who die din the war and his parents, distant mother Beatrice as mentioned and his father, who is in the body of his hero secretariat who comited suiccide in this unvierse due to getting banned from racing, as that’s the kind of weird shit dreams do. Also Zack Braff, who has no real conncetion to bojack but still died during that time Mr Peanutbutters house sunk into the earth and his ex wife Jesscia bIel formed a death cult. The group play a game of best and worst, lay into each ohter and have some really intresting conversations with Bojack confident of when it’ll end: before the show their always mentioing. But this time, it’s diffrent.. Bojack is there for it so we get a trippy and horrifyimng stage show as Bojack watches the various people one by one vo into a black door, allt he while bojack coughts up sludge and is persued by it, unaware where he was before this. Sarah Lynn gives one last song, a reprise of a song from previous in the series, Courdroy does a ribbon dance and zack braff gets on roller skates. And bojack has a frank conversation with his dad, with his dad/secretariat revealing he DID care but was just so filled with loathing he coudlnt’ admit it to his son and thus was an abusive ass.. and then reveals to bojack he’s not waking up and bojack horryfigngly see shimself, drowning ina pool. And while he frantically, heartbreakingly tries to flee... he can’t. There’s no exit for him. As herb tells him, this isn’t the afterlife, this is his brain making sense of his last moments, and ther’es no way of knowing if he’ll get rescued, no way to do anything but watch.. watch as his father secretairat shows suicide in all it’s horror by letting it know he wouldn’t of done it if he knew “the view fro halfway down”, a horrifingly haunting poem that sells just how bad it was. As beatrice and crackerjack also go we’re down to herb who introduces bojack... before going in himself, claming there is no other side. Bojack tries not to go genle and runs, and in a horrfying sequence is surronded by the ooze as he tries his damndest to escape.. but in the end he can’t. As herb said.. he can’t do anything about this. So speaking to his min’ds version of diane he accepts he probbaly won’t be coming back and we hear a monitor as we fade out. While we know it’s not the end now... there’s no way of telling then.

The View from Halfway Down is a haunting, beatuflly animated, masterwork, taking 6 seasons worth of communinity and regret and shoving it in bojack’s face in an intresting way, while bringing back characters we thought we’d never see again for one last go round. It was patcually nice to hear LIn Manuel Miranda and Wendy Mallick again,, and Kristan Schaal is always great. The show ALWAYS had a horrifying habit of having it’s penutlimate episode be an utter gutpunch that broke you, with the finale picking up the peices and offering some hope.. and this was no exception. They literally saved the best for last, and it was worth the wait. The view from halfway down may be gahstly,.. but the view of this episode is hauntingly beautiful.

So that was the list, and it was.. a lot taking 2-3 days to finish all together over both parts. But it was worth it and hopefully we can get back to some regular stuff later today. For now, thank you for reading, and hopefully i’ll see you somewhere in the sunset.

#steven universe future #steven unvierse #the owl house #lumity #catradora #She Ra and the Princesses of Power #bojack horseman #close enough #infnity train #2020 #best of the year #animation #disney #cartoon network #hbo max #netflix #disney channel #lbgtq

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rexcoatlarchive · 3 years

Text

Cancun chaos festival

A/N: Another story in the multi-class series. This one's unique in that it not only serves as a story about Quetz gaining another class, but it's also set up for a fan made event. Decided that it'd be fun to also include @panyum 's Ayako in here for more mastersona fun.

The wandering sea received a transmission of a new singularity happening. This one was detected in Cancun, Mexico. The two masters of chaldea were sent in along with some servants to help deal with it.

When arriving the two masters along with their servants found themselves to be in an airport. As it was summer and they were going to Mexico, they dressed appropriately.

Rex: weird we found ourselves in an airport. Kind of reminds me of the Hawaii incident.

Ayako: ugh, don't remind me. That was hell, having to repeat the same week over and over again.

Rex: hopefully this won't be so bad.

Quetz: si! We'll solve the issue here in no time! And hopefully we can have fun too!

Quetzalcoatl was dressed in bikini with a Mexican flag design on the top. And a white skirt wrap covering the bikini bottom.

Ayako: Quetz you seem different? I can't put my finger as to why tho.

Quetz: I actually had my spirit origin altered to saber class since it was finally my turn to enjoy summer!

Rex was silent, he started dumbfounded at his wife. She looked amazing in her bikini. He couldn't take his eyes off of her.

Ayako: *noticing Rex staring* huh? Oh of course he's staring. Hey! Earth to Rex! *starts snapping her fingers*

Rex: huh! What is it?

Ayako: could you focus for a minute. You don't need to keep staring at her.

Rex: hey it's not my fault she's so breathtaking. Besides don't act like you haven't stared at the count when he's in his summer clothes.

Ayako: hey! Don't try to turn this around on me!

Dantes: are you all talking about me?

The count came in while wearing said summer clothing.

Ayako: it's nothing. Let's just get this over with.

Rex: we still have to wait for one more.

Ayako: oh yeah, your happy accident.

Kuku: hey! Who you calling an accident?!

Kukulkan came in wearing her own summer clothes. A simple black and gold bikini. Her spirit origin was also altered, but for some reason she came out as an assassin

Rex: ok it seems like everyone we came with is here. So now we can get started

Ayako: hey, how's it feel with another version of your wife?

Rex: real interesting I'll say that much. But you know, we might be able to do the same for you

Ayako: what are you talking about?

Rex: well I mean, the count was a very different person pre-impressonment. Maybe a pre Avenger version of him can be summoned.

Dantes: ok, could you cease this foolish discussion.

As the group talked they noticed a familiar looking person about to exit the airport.

Ayako: hey, whose that?

Dantes: it would seem to be black beard.

Ayako: ah. Forget I noticed him, and let's move on.

Rex: hey wait a second let's actually talk to him he might know something about this singularity we're dealing with.

Ayako: but of all servants! Why did it have to be him!

Rex: I'll do the talking so you don't have to. Heyyo Teach!

Black beard heard this and turned to look at the group.

Black beard: oh hey Master! Fancy seeing you here! You guys finally participating in another Servant festival again?

Rex: well actually we were here to deal with a singularity.

Black beard: really? That's odd.

Ayako: yeah, real strange. Can we go now?

Rex: can you chill?

Black beard: anyways I can't talk I'm actually running later then normal, I'll see you all later.

Rex: huh, not like him to be late to this stuff.

Ayako: why'd it have to be servantfes again? Hated the last one.

Rex: I mean I doubt BB is gonna force us into another time loop.

Ayako: you're jinxing us!

Rex: oh you know that's bullshit!

Quetz: can you two please calm down. We'll make sure the situation is handled.

Rex: Quetz is right. We need to thi-

But before Rex could finish that thought they heard a voice yelling

Black beard: What the hell!?

Rex: oh shit, it seems somethings wrong.

The group runs outside only to see chaos. The city of Cancun was being run amok. Criminals were running around causing chaos. Monsters were attacking innocent people.

Ayako: holy crap!

Rex: what happened?!

Black beard: that's what I'd like to know!

As the group witnessed the chaos, the masters' communicators started up

Da Vinci: it seems we've finally started communications.

Ayako: Da Vinci do you have any idea what's going on?

Da Vinci: why yes I do dear Ayako. It seems an Avenger class divine spirit origin has been detected. It's likely they are the cause of all this pandemonium.

Kuku: you have any idea who it might be?

Da Vinci: it seems to match up with the mesoamerican moon goddess Coyolxauhqui.

Quetz: you've got to be kidding me!

Dantes: Another case of family drama it seems.

Ayako: the last time we had to deal with issues in Mexico it related to Quetzalcoatl too. I think it's safe to say this is what we should be expecting from now on.

Quetz: so if my sister is the cause then I guess I'll make sure I'll handle this personally!

Rex: we were going to do that anyways but I guess it is more personal now.

Quetz: this is actually a good opportunity!

Rex: huh?

Quetz: the people are in despair, villains and monsters are causing chaos. They need a hero! And I'll be that hero!

After she said this she changed her Ascension. Now all of a sudden she was clad in what looked to be a Super hero costume. She wore a red leotard with a green feathered serpent emblem on the chest. She had red knee length boots with a green trim, and matching elbow length gloves. She also adorned a red lucha style mask with green trimming near the eye and mouth holes. And to top it all off a flowing red cape.

Rex: Holy Crap!

Quetz: now Quetzal Woman is here!

Ayako: ok, what the hell!? A super hero?

Quetz: si! Me and mi amor were watching super hero films and I decided I wanted to be one myself. I had Da Vinci create this costume and now I can put it to use.

Dantes: seems a bit ridiculous if you ask me.

Rex: don't listen to him Quetz. I think it's perfect!

Quetz: gracias mi amor!

Kuku: so you're going to play hero while fighting sis?

Quetz: si! And you'll be my sidekick!

Kuku: huh!? I never agreed to that!

Quetz: oh come now Kukulkan! At least help out

Kuku: I'll help out but why as your sidekick?

Quetz: oh come on! I even had a costume made for you!

Kuku: seriously!?

Quetzalcoatl held out another costume. A black and gold costume that matched hers.

Kuku: I'm not wearing that! I'll do this my own way!

After she said that she ran off on her own. Much to the frustration of the group.

Quetz: eehh!? What's wrong with the costume?

Rex: well maybe it's not her style?

Quetz: I thought it looked good.

Ayako: man this is annoying.

A/N: there's the story for now. Like I said at the beginning it basically functions as the set up for my own made up event. I will come back to this soon, to expand more on summer Kuku since this mostly focused on summer Quetz. I won't do a whole event's story for now, but I am considering coming back and doing more for this story.

Tag time! @panyum @grievouslyxorvia @hasishtardoneanythingwrong @hasereshdoneanythingwrong @haspaulbunyandoneanythingwrong @hasabbydoneanythingwrong @castlecsejtespeakertechnician @gxymlky

#fate grand order #quetzalcoatl #wife #kukulkan #ayako #edmond dantes #rexcoatl #rex #leonardo da vinci #coyolxauhqui #summer

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spongebob-connoisseur · 2 years

Note

stupid question but who in the cast would be a tumblr sexyman

Sorry this is an old ask, I'm sorry I kept you waiting for so long. I did initially respond but tumblr deleted my original answer for some reason.

Anyways I'm redoing it. I know this is referencing the MildBobbySauce post about who would be tumblr sexymen. I largely agree with that list. So instead of repeating. I'm just gonna explain why.

**this is a joke btw

Mr. Krabs - I've already seen too many people being 📯 for Mr. Krabs. Gruffy dilf who's been in the navy. Y'all are nasty but respect😤

Plankton - both the musical and the tv show, even the voice actor somehow. A lot of people LOVE Plankton. Its the deep voice and rage and charisma paired with a good heaping of tragedy. A good combination. His musical counterpart is good looking. His voice actor has a lot of fangirls amongst the SB fandom. This is all no coincidence.

Squidward - both the musical and the show. If SB came out today I just KNOW Squidward would instantly become a tumblr sexyman. Tall, lanky, nasally voice. I can see his human counterpart being drawn with an oblong face and longer nose. Idk that's usually the stuff you see reoccurring in the most generic male tumbkr sexymen. Squidward's features would instantly be woobified into the most stereotypical sexyman imaginable. Minus the suit.

But that aside, he's snarky and sarcastic. He's aloof and disinterested. He's a snooty artist type. Come on. I know all the signs. Also his musical counterpart was *chefs kiss*

I actually had a bit of a crush on his musical counterpart 👉👈 like waaaay back when I was 16🤢

The Flying Dutchman - he's a ghost pirate. Ghost pirate dilf man. Idk I know some people who really like him, I wish them all good luck. I simply enjoy the chaos he brings along with him into any episode.

Dutchman's sea monster date - I wrote a list about tumblr sexymen so I know what to write here. This one wasn't on the list but I had to add her. Monsterfuckers gonna LOVE this one. She's so powerful she gets to on this list.

Charlton Hawkfish - you cannot google this character without fanart of him shirtless coming up.

Perch Perkins - I'm surprised he doesn't have more fangirls, suit, voice, generally decent looking lolllll. Nah I'm kidding but he's a blank slate. All you need is some insane person to project and create fanart for him and I can see this ball rolling into a cult.

That being said there were mega simps for him when the musical came out. Of course why not?

Spongebob - the musical one had lots of simps because Ethan Slater. but I can see the main series one also having simps. People would go crazy for the squidward/spongebob dynamic if it came out. Goofy optimist and bitter pessimist is a natural combination.

But to be fair, I think he'd be more the tumblr precious bean. Cinnamon roll boy. Too pure for this world UwU.

Larry - I'd say he's a himbo but compared to other residence of bikini bottom, he actually has brain cells. I'm not sure if its because everyone else is just incredibly stupid, it makes Larry seem smarter by comparison. Anyways he still got the strong and sweet part down. Go crazy.

King Neptune - both og and movie. Og version is built like a Greek god. Good luck. Movie version is a dilf.

Squilliam - idk snarky rich boy. Someone's gotta like him.

Master Udon - hehehehehe I added him here because I know someone who would LOVE this dude. I can already imagine. He's built like her favorite type. So he went on the list for that reason. I think she'd hate me if I told her xD but there must be other girlies or dudes or simps who'd be the same.

Manray - there's a lot of simps for Manray already. Sometimes he's a little too detailed physically in some episodes. Like in Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy III and the tickle belt.

Young mermaid man and barnacle boy - nearly forgot these guys. They're jacked. In the comics they get more development and I can imagine it becoming a thing. Now old mermaid man and barnacle boy. Seek help.

The dirty bubble - tbh I've seen someone on here draw the dirty bubble in lingerie. Idk tf was going on there but good luck.

Gale Gobbler - suit, eccentric, insane. He'd use the weather as pickup lines. Someone can roll with that. I'm sure.

Don Grouper - he's gross. Falls into ugly sexyman but if Pearl likes him then I know some nastyass motherfucker here would like him too.

Fred - voiced by Doug Lawrence lolllll also he had his own episode. He's very sweet, loves his big buff nurse gf.

Norton - he's adorable. Especially in the recent seasons where you get to know more about him. He's so likable. He just wants to make friends and he's pretty enthusastic. I know some people were upset how he became nicer in the later seasons because they liked mean he was in the earlier seasons but lol who cares.

Though if someone was truly insane enough, they too can make him into a sexyman.

Incidental 70 - he's got a cult already. Who's to say a good portion of that cult doesn't have fangirls? I'm leaving that out there for ya.

Stanley Squarepants - despite the fact that the Stanley Squarepants episode being not that good. Stanley still remains well liked. I like him too even despite how frustrating the actual episode was. He had potential.

But that's not why he's here. He's here because this dude seems to have a lot of fics and fanart and selfshippers attached to him. I think they like the quiet, timid, shy nature Stanley has. He hasn't much confidence in himself which props up the fan girl/simp mentality "I can fix him"

Slappy - my favorite boy! You know I couldn't forget about him :) he's ugly and weird. But he's got the tumblr sexyman suit and bowtie (can't forget the bowtie! Classic sexyman trait) also if the creepypastas could get fangirls, if SALADFINGERS could get fangirls then why not Slapzo?🥺

Also other peter parodies on here get some love like Yetch and the others. Slappy is the same flavor as them so he deserves some bitches too😌

Though I think I'd die if someone made a human form and completely tumblr sexyfied him. I'd projectile vomit blood. I just know it. He should look like Hans Beckert or bust😤

Anyways here ya go. This shouldn't have taken so long tumblr is just super buggy for me. Everytime this gets deleted I lose motivation to try to answer all over again. With this happening so frequently, you'd think I'd learn to write it out on the notes app then copy and paste it here. But that takes planning 👀 which ruins my flow.

Hope you enjoy because I'm gonna go throw up my dinner now👍

#Ask #This gets deleted so often because its gods way of telling me not to write this stupid shit #Cursing #spongebob #spongebob squarepants #the spongebob connoisseur #sb #spongebon squarepants #spongebob meme

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the-fiction-witch · 3 years

Text

Together P2

REAL LIFE X FALLOUT STYLE WORLD. COUPLE: TBS X READER RATING: SAD AND SWEET

“Poopyhead” she giggled

“Well said Jane” I smile heading down the road towards town, I saw Maggie outside her house on her little sun lounger with her little glass of ice tea

“y/n!” She smiled as she saw me getting up wrapping her robe around her bikini clad body

“Hello Maggie” I sighed

“Awwww look at the chubby little nugget!” she giggled pinching jane’s cheek “You off shopping?”

“Yeah, I have to get somethings for dinner”

“Ummm I don’t envy you darling” she says sitting back on her lounger with her tea “No gardener? No housekeeper? No nanny? No shopper?”

“We manage don’t we Jane” I smiled fixing her little black curls

“You know, I think you should get yourself married again” she says

“I uhh I’m alright. Just me and Jane”

“Really? You must have askings?”

“Not really”

“Ohh you kidder of course you do, I’ve turned down four this week” she smiled “All clambering to be number three”

“I need to get going maggie” I told her starting to push the pram down the street

“Alright, I’ll give them your number darling, Nothing wrong with a little chatting” she giggled as I walked

“Sure Maggie” I sighed hurring along.

When I got into town it was busy, with ladies going back and forth in their beautiful dresses And sweet little heels. ‘Fetchers’ going along there little ways doing shopping for those to lazy or to rich to do it themselves. I shopped for a while, carefully my few notes and coins needing to get me the food I need for a month, making sure that I got the best value for my money. I paid for all my shopping sitting it in the bottom of the stroller I headed out to the street watching people come and go around the place, when suddenly every single phone and device and such went off it was so strange that every single thing went off at the same time everyone checked them and looked confused. The screen in the square came on, it was a man sat at a desk, he was some official I wasn’t sure who exactly

“My dear citizens, I hoped dearly that I would not have to come to you with this news, on this day or any other, but it has seemed it was inevitable, Tensions have been mounting between our distant nations, and it seems that is is the result. There has been an official warning to prevent civilian casualties that now sits at a countdown of thirty minutes, We are at war. And when the countdown ends we launch our attacks and they launch there's, thirty minutes. And the Nuclear war shall begin” He explained everyone was frozen unsure if this was real he seemed to be crying “it was my pleasure to serve and I am sorry” He says putting a gun to his head and with the sound of the gunshot the video cut out.

Everyone was frozen, but a woman screamed and people began running and screaming, breaking windows and looting shops. Everyone panicked. I made sure I had everything and ran home, pulling jane’s little stroller along with me, she was giggling unsure what on earth was happening, everyone was panicking trying to get sorted, I grabbed my suitcases half packed anyway throwing my last few things I couldn’t live without, throwing all of jane’s clothes in a case throwing all her toys and blankets in as fast as I could. Watching my watch nineteen minutes let, I loaded the cases on her stroller and ran as fast as I could the streets starting to empty I ran as fast as I could to the bunker but I saw the man stood there about to shut the door

“NO! Please!” I screamed he stopped a moment

“I’m sorry were overcapacity as it is” He says

“No please, I have a child”

“..... I’m sorry” he says going to shut the door

“No! No please, take her. Take her please” I begged picking her up out her stroller holding her close “Not me, but take her… please.”

He looked at us a moment unsure he sighed and spoke “I’m sorry” He says slamming the door closed

“NOOOO!” I screamed banging on the door, I checked my watch ten minutes left.

I went back to the house as fast as I could in the hope of finding something anything I could give them to let us in, But I saw him the guy across the road. He was locking up his garage with the most heavy duty lock possible I was confused why wasn’t he in the shelter with everyone else, he can’t be seriously thinking his house will- He’s not leaving. He’s got a homedom.

I ran over holding jane in my arms he saw us and ran into his house but I stopped him before he could shut the door “Please, Please they won’t let us into the shelter. You have a homedom don’t you?”

“Maybe I do. Maybe I don’t” He says

“Please, Please I’m begging you we don’t have anywhere else to go. We don’t have anything please” I begged

“...I don’t have the space-”

“Please! Just take her then. Please just take my little girl.”

He looked at us both and my stroller of things, and he opened the door “Downstairs to the left I’ve got some stuff to get then I’ll be down” He says

“Thank you! Thank you so much” I smiled hugging him tightly

“Alright alright go on we’ve only got eight minuets” he says pushing me off him lifting my stroller into the house up the one little step, I took jane and our things down the stairs and into the homedom, I had seen them advertised under home shelters, they were expensive few people had them not even maggie could afford one, they usually could keep one to four people in them this one was clearly a two person one but it was better then out there, I was unsure where to go or what to do in this little place.

I was one large room with a dining table and cooking area, a double bed to the side, a long rail for clothes with some already on it, a small bathroom in the corner with no walls to protect it, he had already brought food and such down here as well as much of his stuff. I put janes’ stroller in the corner where there was some space, and sat on the bed corner bouncing her as she giggled with her rattle having enjoyed all the running around we had done. I checked my watch five minuets left. I heard a noise the door opened, he came down and shut the door locking it and setting for it to airlock, that would take two minutes or so. He came down with the last box of something sitting it on the dinning table.

“I don’t know how I can thank you.”

“You can start but shutting up. I’m thinking”

“..oh, sorry” I said “What uhh are we going to do about a crib? For jane?”

“Oddly enough that's just what, I’m trying! To think about.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay, uhhh can she sleep in her stroller?”

“Yeah I can change it into a sort of crib I just don’t remember how”

“I’ll figure it out” He says just then she started to cry “Give her here”

“Uhh okay” I said handing her over to him she seemed so happy with him, he bounced her and fixed her hair a little

“She’s hungry, you got milk for her right?”

“Yeah, uhh here” I said digging though her bag and getting her bottle handing it to him and he happily fed her “You’re good with her”

“Yeah I always was good with babies” He laughs once she had enough he handed her back to me “I’ll go figure this out” He says going and unpacking my stroller for me

“You didn’t have to do this for us”

“I didn’t”

“Then why did you?” I asked

“... I might be an asshole. But I’m not a monster” He says “I’m not leaving you two out there to die”

“Thank you”

“It’s fine.” he says as he managed to get it all to click in and make her little crib “There, she can sleep here”

“Thank you, I guess we should all get comfortable” I laughed putting jane down for her nap

“You and I’ll share. If that's alright?”

“That's fine” I nodded “Better then out there”

“Exactly” He smiled “Uhh thomas.”

“y/n” I smiled “and that's jane, but she likes janie too”

“Guess we’ve got to get used to each other.”

“I guess so, I uhh I mean it thomas. I don’t know how I’d ever repay you, if there’s anything. You have only to ask”

“I’ll keep it in mind. I’d feel like shit if I left you”

At that moment the very earth rumbled shaking everything in sight and I lost my balance and went right into thomas luckily he caught me so I didn’t fall onto the floor his hands on my waist until it stopped

“Uhh hi” I blushed

“Hi.” He blushed still holding me “did you uhhh… wanna unpack?”

“Right yes” I smiled moving away fixing my dress “sorry,”

“don’t worry about it” He smiled, I went to sort my things out hanging up my dresses mostly “That was a hit. Likely close to the city but outside of the limits.”

“How… how do you know that?”

“You pick up things you know” He shrugs putting the radio on it was nothing but hissing

“Impact. 12. 83. 45.” The robotic voice said, Thomas sat at the table getting a map of the area about twenty to thirty miles square. And a pen

“That’s hazard street. Right down the middle” He says making a note of it Hazard street was only just two maybe four blocks away,

‘Impact. 82. 42. 76.” the voice said

“That’s greenlands.”

“What are they playing battleship?” I giggled

“Essentially yeah” He laughs “I’m just keeping an eye on it. In case we get one close of us.”

“Can this take a direct?”

“Within a five miles well get rad’s but it should block it out. Any closer we get a shake. Ontop of us. I don’t know, but I think if we got one right on the house then… even if we do last the hit we’re fucked”

“Good point” I said as I finished with my things and began to janes toys and clothes “cup of tea?” I asked spotting the teabags in my shopping

“Yeah, that’d be nice Y/n”

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princessplantasaurus · 3 years

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Sponge AU Masterlist (for drabble requests and more!)

Alright so I literally just realized that I’m out here asking people for drabble prompts and vaguely mentioning my AUs but...a lot of newer sponge followers found me after the proshot and therefore weren’t around for these AUs?? So here is a masterlist of my Sponge AUs! I’m currently accepting any and all drabble prompts for any and all of these AUs and I’m also willing to answer questions or give some headcanons about them should anyone be curious! I’m also willing to do AUs of these AUs, such as, say a soulmate AU taking place in one of the AUs listed below, for example. 1. Regular Humanized Musical AU Basically exactly what it says on the tin. Based on the musical, all the characters are/appear human. Wrote quite a bit for this before, can be found here. 2. Regular Humanized Musical AU except Karen’s a robot Same as above, except while everyone else is a human, Karen appears human but is a robot. Sheldon built her originally as an assistant for his (then) new restaurant, and somewhere along the way she developed romantic feelings that she never expected him to return (but obviously, he did). Typically a little more angsty or in the hurt/comfort genre than the regular humanized musical au, often drabbles took place much before the musical, in the early days of Plankton and Karen’s relationship. Wrote quite a few of these, can be found here.

3. College AU Ah yes, the one that started it all. Basically a humanized college AU but this was the main one I wrote for. There was a fic posted on ao3 and also several drabbles. First year student Edward started at college in Bikini Bottom with his high school boyfriend as his roommate. When his roommate cheats on him during frosh week, he eventually works up the nerve to request a move. He ends up rooming with fellow first year students Bobby and Patrick, who were best friends from day one. Bobby works at an on-campus restaurant as fry cook, and eventually gets Edward a job as cashier, replacing Sheldon, the former best friend of their student manager, a fourth year student named Eugene Krabs. Eugene and Sheldon were best friends since elementary school, and went to the same college with the plan of graduating with degrees in business and food science and opening their own restaurant together. When Sheldon stated dating Karen, however, it through a wrench in their friendship. Eugene knocking up his girlfriend and now having to worry about being a father on top of graduating and managing the restaurant has put a lot of stress on him. Meanwhile, Sandy Cheeks, a first year student, just got kicked out of the sorority she only got into since she was the daughter of an alumni. There’s so much more I could say about this AU since this AU is the most “my baby” of all of them but I’ll leave it at this. 3a. Coffee Shop AU An AU of the College AU that featured Bobby as the campus’ resident barista, who deemed himself cafe cupid as he tried to pair up both Sheldon and Karen, and Perch and Edward. Wrote a small handful of things that can be found here. 4. Battle of the Bands AU Team of Tres, 3 twenty something best friends (Bobby, Patrick and Sandy) who have been playing as a pop rock band for a few years, and are finally entering the Bikini Bottom Battle of the Bands, where the winner gets signed to a major label. They think they have it in the bag, until they realize last year’s runners up, Chum Bucket, who toured with the Electric Skates as their opening act, are back to compete again. Chum Bucket is a duo, fronted by leading man vocalist Sheldon Plankton, who considers himself a bisexual sex god rock star and likes to maintain this image, often bringing fans backstage to make out with them. Doing literally everything else for Chum Bucket is the second member, Karen, who writes, produces, and arranges all their songs, while also live mixing and DJing behind Sheldon during sets. What no one knows is Sheldon and Karen have actually been dating for close to 10 years, something they’ve been keeping secret in order for Sheldon to keep up his ‘image’ with the fan base. Feeling the need to add a little extra edge to the band, Bobby recruits Pearl, the teenage daughter of his day job’s manager, after hearing her sing one day and realizing she’s a better lead vocalist than he’d ever be. Pearl’s dad doesn’t exactly KNOW they’re doing this. And why, pray tell, is Bobby’s next door neighbor always complaining about their music? What could Edward possibly know about music, anyway? (When I was initially going to write this as a fic I kept Edward’s role in this a secret and tbh I still kinda want to unless someone requests a drabble prompt that involves his involvement.) I did write a little bit for this au, all of which can be found here. And now onto the stuff I never got around to writing! 5. Monsters and Aliens AU This one’s gonna be vague as hell because this started as a vague pitch of “Spongebob Universal Monsters AU” that me and my friend Bella kept snowballing in DMs (specifically while I was in the stock room at the place I worked at the time one day, I remember this vividly for some reason??). So basically you got Sheldon who’s a vampire, Sandy who’s a weresquirrel, Squidward as a Phantom of the Opera type, and Patrick who’s a Frankenstien’s Monster type. They are all basically being held in a house arrest type situation, free to live in their little house on the outskirts of town but not wanted by Bikini Bottom as a society since they’ve all wreaked havoc on the town before. Spongebob is town’s local hero kid. Ever since he was young, his upbeat unbreakable positivity and unwavering stick-to-it-iveness have been utilized by the town to stop disaster, including sending him to save them from the monsters multiple times. When a race of alien robots invade and threaten to not just destroy and conquer Bikini Bottom, but the world, the town decides it’s best to send the monsters at them like a little monster army. Spongebob, worried for his monster friends, decides to spearhead this process so that he can help them plan and train. (Karen is also involved in this AU, as one of the alien robots who “defects” to the “good side” because Plankton “sucessfully” “secudes” her, but that’s a whole separate side tangent) 6. Girl Group AU I LITERALLY FORGOT THIS EVEN EXISTED UNTIL I WAS GOING THROUGH OLD DMs AND IT CAME FLOODING BACK TO ME. Sandy, Pearl and Karen started as a group of high school friends posting videos of themselves singing on YouTube who eventually got big enough to be signed to a major label. Sandy is the lead vocalist and doesn’t really want to BE a musician anymore. Singing was fun when it was just a side hobby she did with two of her friends, but she hates the fame and doesn’t want to pursue music as a career. She’d really rather dedicate her life to science, but she doesn’t want to ruin things for Pearl and Karen Pearl is the youngest (was 15 when they started making videos as opposed to Sandy and Karen who were almost 17) and feels like she’s constantly stuck in Sandy’s shadow. Wants to prove to the world (and her dad) that she’s more than just Sandy’s back up singer. Karen writes all the songs and mostly stays out of the spotlight. Has highkey been sleeping with their manager since day one, despite Sheldon claiming he treats all of his clients equally and doesn’t play favorites. (should be noted that Karen and Sandy were 19ish by the time they were signed and Sheldon would’ve been 20 or 21 since I picture him as an intern who got to surpass his mentor by finding and signing ‘the next big thing’ so like...the Sheldon/Karen relationship is at a healthy age difference don’t get that twisted) But yeah those are the AUs!! And I may think of more!! But I’m back in Sponge mode and want to write more drabbles so feel free to send literally anything into my inbox!! It can be just a little idea of your own, and I’ll also be reblogging starter prompts a few times a week if you’d rather send something from one of those! Feel free to specify an AU! Or not and I’ll pick the one I’m feeling! But thank you very much to everyone who read this monstrosity of a post I owe you my life.

#spongebob broadway #spongebob musical #the spongebob musical #spongebob squarepants musical #spongebob the musical #spongebob squarepants the musical

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h-e-l-l-b-r-o-k-e · 5 years

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Galapogos [B. Hargrove x you]

Summary: Billy’s temper always causes him problems, but luckily he has Max to talk just a bit of sense into him.

Inspiration: Galapogos by The Smashing Pumpkins & Lost Stars by Adam Levine (Begin Again Soundtrack)

Word Count: 2875 Warnings: profanity, angst, and mentions of abuse.

Written Date: 07/20-22/2019 Posted Date: 7/23/2019

[PART 1]< >[PART 2]

Billy hadn’t meant to push you.

It wasn’t your fault your ex-boyfriend David had started hiding a liquor flask inside of his varsity jacket because he hated the presence of the new girl who clung to his bicep. It wasn’t your fault David the Douche couldn’t hold his alcohol and wanted you back. It wasn’t your fault that he had chosen the school parking lot to stumble into an already irritated Billy who had just minutes to pick up Max and get home because Mr. Hargrove had already gotten on his case the evening before.

You weren’t supposed to be there. Just hours ago in the blue Camaro with a half-eaten sandwich on your lap, you’d told Billy you had plans with your yearbook classmates. Something about a new comedy film down at the theater that everyone’s been psyched to see. Billy’s never been too good at remembering certain details. Either way, after everything he has been through, Billy should have known that plans never go as planned.

He hadn’t meant to push you. Especially not in front of the entire student body.

But, there you had been in your new skirt, now tainted with black stains from the new cement Hawkins had promised with that tax raise, with tears threatening to spill down your doe eyes. The pang in his chest tells him that you’ll never wear that skirt again, not without freshening the sting in your scraped palms or the incessant pounding just beneath your rib cage.

And yet, he couldn’t bare to see the familiarity of hate finally poison the only form of comfort and affection he’s had since his mother left him or keep up his appearance by finishing the fight your stupid ex-boyfriend had started.

Billy cannot remember the space of time between then and the vibrations through the cool leather under his thighs as the Camaro roared out of there. Out of everyone’s accusing eyes—even the piece of shit Tommy H. had nothing to say. And as he sits on his unruly bed with his head in his hands, Billy cannot even tell what’s worst: the fact that he ran away with his tail between his legs or the fact that he left behind the only girl he’d ever taken seriously.

The sound of skateboard wheels aggressively running over cracks and bumps in the pavement go through one ear and out the other—there’s no room in Billy’s loud head for the outside world to settle. Not the creaks from the stubborn doorknob. Not the slamming of the front door nor the stomping of size five Keds as they approach his bedroom.

Everything is dead to him until the thirteen-year-old he barely tolerates stands at his doorway with her hands on her waist and a scowl on her freckled face.

“What?”

Billy’s dirty blond locks hang over his face in the fashion of a veil as his hands act like a mask. He hasn’t looked up from his position on the bed nor has his favorite mirror caught a glimpse of his vanity. He’s avoiding the very face he was gifted, afraid to finally see the monster that had frightened you.

“Do you have brain damage or something?” Max’s voice is too loud compared to the silence that’s embraced him for the past ten minutes. “You were supposed to pick me up, and don’t dare try to say I was late—”

“Leave me alone.” His voice is muffled.

Max’s blue eyes scrutinize Billy’s pathetic form. His hair’s a mess and she can tell he hasn’t lifted a single weight since he got home—the faded jean jacket still hangs off his broad shoulders. Her next set of words are far more gentler, yet still carries the same edge: “Did somebody die?”

“No.” His shoulders slump just a bit lower. “Go play with your stupid dolls. I don’t care.”

“Ew, you know I don’t touch that shit.”

Billy’s hands smooth down his warm face, and she sees it. The sensitive skin around his eyes are tinged red. “Go away,” he waves her away as he digs for a stray cigarette in his pocket.

His trembling fingers manage to grasp the tip of the cigarette he knew he had hid and shoves it between his lips, suckling on the dry stick as if he were dying of thirst. And before he even knows it, he’s patting himself down for a lighter.

As the trusty lighter remains incognito, the feeling of ants crawling over his taut muscles amplifies. Then he remembers, there’s a shitty spare in his bedside drawer under some wrinkled school assignments marked with grades his father wouldn’t approve of. But as he shakes, flicking the flint wheel over and over again hoping for just a spark, he remembers he never went down to the liquor store to refill its fluids.

“Fuck!” Max flinches as the cheap plastic crashes against the wall wisps away from her head. “What the hell?!”

“Shit…” Billy collapses against his bed in tune with the breath in his lungs. “Sorry.”

Max faces her dirty tennis shoes, sucking on her bottom lip as a million scenarios in which how her step-brother could have fucked up past through her mind. Every sweeping thought involved you somehow, and she actually kind of liked you.

“Go find her.”

The ceiling stares down on him, every groove and every indent. Good thing plaster and paint don’t have a conscience to judge him, despite always being the witness of Billy at his worst.

“What?” Billy’s not sure he heard right, especially when Max never meddles in his business.

A Ked nears his bed in a tentative step forward. “Go fix whatever happened.”

The lines embedded in his forehead loosen up like the curls that frame his face. All anyone ever does is automatically point the finger at him. It started with his father until even Billy started to believe that maybe he was the fuck-up his father said he’d always be.

“Prove to her that everyone in this shithole is wrong about you,” Max keeps her gaze settled on him, watching for any sort of cautionary reaction, “or whatever.”

Billy takes a deep breath. “Why should I listen to you?” he scoffs, “You’re thirteen.”

If there’s anything that Max knows about her step-brother is his loose temper. Living under the same roof as him taught her that Neil had long since snapped the leather of Billy’s leash in half, despite the older man pretending it was the fault of the dog’s breed rather than his own treatment of it.

Her legs are ready to run to her room, but her feet have found the courage to stand on the stained carpet. Max swallows some of her insecurities, “Because you’re scared.”

Besides you, Max is the only other person who can read and solve him like a simple math equation. It’s the only thing you two have in common, and it’s irritating as fuck.

Blue eyes snap to her for a moment as his shoulders straighten. “Hey! I’m not scared,” but then his eyes trail to the bikini-chick poster taped to his closet door and the energy keeping his frustration together disintegrates. “I have to babysit you, brat. There’s a difference.”

“You can.” A sigh leaves her chapped lips when Billy gives her a confused look. “I’ll call Neil, tell him I asked you to take me to the arcade. Not a big deal.”

It takes a moment before the lubrication reaches the rusty gears in his brain. He sits up and runs a hand through his locks. It’s not like he’s never gone behind his father’s back. “Where are you actually going?”

Max shrugs, “None of your business.”

The drive there is only possible due to muscle memory, an acquired reflex after driving down this familiar neighborhood so many times while all his senses have been locked on you. Complex guitar-solos screeching through the speakers, yet your sweet-as-honey voice always managing to seep through the noise. His hand reaching out to where it belongs—on the flesh of your thigh. Girly-scented shampoo invading his nostrils as your lips focused on his neck. Half-lidded eyes painting murals across the windshield, of your bedroom, ruffled sheets, and how he wanted to ravage you.

Except now, his sweaty palms cling to the steering wheel as the road ahead looks the same as the school’s parking lot—smooth, with a seal-coat. His favorite metal tunes for the evening is the gasp that left your lips when you hit the ground. The scent of your shampoo is replaced by David’s breath, reeking of cheap whiskey as he purposely bumped shoulders. His artistic eye tries to imagine a chance to win you back, but all he gets is hacked images of your locked front door.

The only thing that isn’t different is the fact that the rules of the road only ever came second to Billy’s mood. Third, after he met you.

When he’d first found out they were moving to buttfuck Indiana, he thought his life was for sure over. Or, at least the beginning of a count-down until his eighteen birthday when he’d be legally free to move back to California. When they’d finally arrived at Hawkins, it was even worse than anything his mind had conjured. It smelled like manure and the girls had nothing on Californian babes.

The town only became a little bit more tolerable once he beat his only competition, Steve Harrington, and was crowned the new king of Hawkins High. But, even then, livestock droppings still wafted in the air and the girls he had one night stands with resembled cows to the point that he was having sex with his eyes closed for the first time in his life.

That is until he bumped into you months into the fall semester.

You had been carrying one of the expensive cameras that belonged to the school, walking as you inspected the piece crafted by Greek gods themselves. In the seconds you had collided with a hard body, you were sure you’d have to kiss goodbye your monthly allowance for the heartbreak that was just about to happen.

The camera never made impact with the linoleum. Instead, it was nestled in the palms of the new kid you had vowed to never interact with. Especially not when the stories you’ve heard around school said that he was just a replica in spirit of your cheating ex-boyfriend. But you had snorted out of disbelief, and the hideous sound out of your bare lips had been enough to capture Billy Hargrove’s interest.

Soon, the promise of never giving another badboy the time of day was snipped with a pair of scissors as you found yourself in his passenger seat, glancing out of the window with a fresh coat of mascara on your virgin eyelashes. Him being new to the town, he had no idea where to take you for your first date together. Benny’s diner had been the destination. Bless his heart.

The standard date had awkward pauses, and even more awkward jokes from Billy’s end. French fries were shared and your fingers kept brushing together like a magnetic pull. You had been sure at the moment that it had to have been the attraction between the rings on his fingers and the ones on yours. It wasn’t the gleam in his bedroom eyes nor the inviting scent of his cologne nor the smooth skin that was revealed by a couple of loose buttons.

When he dropped you off in front of your house, he had admitted that those corny jokes were in hopes to hear that ugly snort one more time. Offense had turned to flattery when he poked his head out the driver’s side window and asked you out on another date for the following day.

You cannot believe you had fallen victim to his charm. A spell the heartbreak over David had taught you to avoid. But, you felt worse knowing that most of the shedding tears are for the death of what was the best you had felt in months. You have had first-hand experience of learning that rollercoasters are not escalators, yet you fooled yourself anyway.

You had thought that expressing loving attention was enough to extinguish a firecracker that’s ready to explode on the Fourth of July. Who knew you’re arrogant enough to think that you possessed that sort of power over anyone, especially a rough-around-the-edges type of boy like Billy. A boy who clearly needs a damn therapist instead of some soft teenage girl with an ugly laugh who’s capable of whispering sweet things into his awaiting ear during sex.

You don’t know how long you’ve been under the comforter with a teddy bear clutched in your arms, staring at your reflection from the floor-mirror in the corner of your room.

Your parents are currently away for their anniversary in some tropical island, sipping on margaritas, while your brother has yet to show his face in this fortress. The telephone has been ringing on and off since Nancy Wheeler had offered you a ride home.

Riding with Nancy was the safest bet. She’s nice, knows when to keep quiet, and doesn’t know you enough to bombard you with questions. Unlike your best friend, who without a doubt always has your best interest in mind, but is too comfortable to give you enough space to mourn. Judilyn talks more than she listens, and you know that half those calls are from her just to tell you about how sorry Billy will be once she gets her hands on him.

You know you should be begging God to turn back time, for another opportunity to change the outcome. You would have been paying attention to where you were going; you wouldn’t have invited him into your little world with your laugh. And you definitely would have kept your arms securely crossed over your chest as the only shield you had against cupid’s arrow.

But, you aren’t. Because despite the shove that sent you sprawling on the cement and the scowl on his face that was so deeply rooted in hate, you’re still madly in love with him. The boy who offers you his jackets when you’re shivering in the howling winds of night. The boy who combs his fingers through your tresses as your naked chests rest as one. The boy who doesn’t care that you don’t try to hide the slight bags beneath your eyes nor any blemishes on your skin you may be battling for the week. The boy who wanted you to express your flawed laugh when, previously, David would have made fun of you for it. The boy who who throughout it all, had been trying his best to show you just how beautiful you, the yearbook girl who hides behind the camera, really are.

You don’t realize you’d fallen asleep until there’s a couple of suspicious sounds outside your window.

The sun casts a golden hue across the sky, seeping into your second-story bedroom and stretching out the shadows of your furniture. You don’t care for the picturesque beauty at the moment; all you want to do is tell Judilyn, who sometimes climbs up your window when you’re ignoring her, to leave you in peace.

The comforter slides off your shoulders as your feet sink into the plush carpet. You’re still in your ruined skirt and the scuffs on your palms haven’t been washed yet, but that has yet to cross your mind from your sleep-roused state.

You slide the window open with every attempt to send your best friend away. “Judy, I thought I made it clear I want to be left a—!”

His mullet shows up first before his glazed cerulean eyes. His cocky voice is nothing but a whisper: “Hey.”

To be continued.

A/N: So, this is the first Stranger Things fic I’ve ever written! I feel pretty accomplished. Let me know what y’all think. I’m down to do more, especially since I’m so mad by what happened to Billy. I can’t promise I’ll be quick because I’m currently balancing a work-heavy summer course, a job, and my own novel.

#Billy Hargrove #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove x you #stranger things #stranger things imagine #billy hargrove imagine #reader insert #st imagine #billy x reader #billy x you #stranger things fanfiction #max mayfield #OCs

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