If it’s not fine it’s not the end
Chapter: 6/7; (previous chapter), (first chapter);
Pairing: Jakexfem!Mc;
Warnings: Spoilers from episode 10, Suicide mention, Spicy🌶️🔥 (NOT NSFW!)
Words: 10 k; (I know...)
Author’s note: This is a story that will follow what happens immediately after episode 10′s ending. I’m not a native English speaker, so any mistakes are due to that. Sorry for being late, again. I kept rewriting this chapter and to this day I’m still not entirely satisfied, but I couldn’t drag myself any longer. I still hope you’ll like this chapter and that you won’t find it cringe. Thank again! :)
For the first time since Hannah was found, you woke up with no swollen eyes and no headache. It was a welcoming surprise, and even just for an instant, you bathed in that unusual sensation- you had forgotten how much you liked to sleep, as the night only brought vivid and morbid fears into play. But for once, complete darkness had engulfed your conscious, allowing you a nice and refreshing peace of mind. A timid moan escaped from your mouth just by thinking about it.
While trying to steer your sore legs, you found yourself trapped in a cage of human flesh. Eyes wide open, you quickly remembered the reason why you had such a pleasant sleep: Jake was pressed against your body, one hand on your lower back, the other on your available shoulder. It almost felt like a sin, watching him being vulnerable and defenseless right next to you without him knowing- but it wasn't like you had much of a choice, anyway.
During your brief time spent together, you had noticed how his movements were perfectly controlled, mechanic, even. He clearly calculated with the upmost precision his actions, down to his speech and mannerism, not leaving space for sudden needs or impulses. To someone's else, he would have seemed robotic or "fake", but you knew that it was all a by-product of his past- he needed to act a certain way if he wanted to survive.
So it was especially rewarding to have the privilege of admiring him so up close, his protective walls crumbled at your presence.
Simply put, he looked angelic: his hair fell neatly on his forehead, soft and clean and from this distance you could smell your shampoo on his locks, your favorite fragrance; it was heartwarming, knowing a piece of you would have followed him, even for just a day.
His rosy lips were slightly parted, and his breath was tickling gently your nose-oddly enough, it wasn't a bad odor either.
His big eyes, always so focused and unrepentant, were resting, beautiful eyelashes adorning them. They were long and thick, as if he was wearing extension- but they were all natural. You almost felt jealous.
His skin was illuminated by the few sun rays that had managed to infiltrate through out the blinders, gifting him a cherubic and solemn aura.
You sighed in awe of his beauty.
He really did resemble a romantic painting, you couldn't help but notice- every inch of him deserving praise.
Once again, you blushed at his mere existence. Going trough all this pain, perhaps, was worth it, if it meant having the love of your life laid by your side.
You nestled your head on his chest and relished on Jake's warmth: if only you could stay like this forever, you thought, as Jake intuitively squeezed you harder against him; if only you could disappear in his embrace.
But the bliss didn't last long.
A hard knock on the door spooked the both of you, bringing you to the harsh present. As you tried to guess who could it have been, you felt Jake's body looming over your entire figure, his arms pushing you behind him. A quick glance to his facial expression and you realized he was caught off guard, and not just that: he was scared.
Your hands rapidly cradled his chin to ground him to reality.
"Jake, it's fine!-We are fine." You hurriedly said, locking gazes with him. His eyes weren't showing any kind of emotion, but his limbs were stiff and unmovable, a clear sign of worry. Albeit on edge, he was listening to what you had to say.
"I-it's probably Hannah. Remember? I told her to come by" your thumb caressed gently his cheek. He seemed to relax a bit more, exhaling all the build up tension.
You wondered if the reason why Jake didn't sleep that often (aside from "work") was that he was scared his persecutors would have found him while he was completely powerless. The bare thought made your heart clench tight in your chest: how afraid he must have been feeling all these years, knowing he wasn't allowed to lower his guard; how much stress he must have been enduring. Maybe the night before was the first time he indulged in one of his desires. And all because of you.
A second knock.
"Guys open the door, it's just Lilly and I!" Hannah yelled, growing impatient. She probably was eager to see Jake, just like you were.
Hearing his sister's voice, Jake released you from his grasp and helped you standing up.
"Y-you're right." He mumbled, fixing his clothes to look more presentable. Judging from his expression, he was feeling ashamed for jumping straight to conclusions- his gaze low, his fingers still twitching.
You grazed the back of his hand in a clumsy attempt to soothe him, to which he replied by a stern smile on his lips.
While Jake stood behind your frame, you unlocked the door to greet the sister duo. They both appeared extremely nervous, Lilly in particular- she was biting her lip a bit too hard, almost drawing blood from it. Hannah, by contrast, sprinted immediately towards Jake to trap him.
"You're okay!" She exclaimed, her arms connecting behind his back. Although still hazy, he returned the gesture.
"I am." Jake insisted, hugging her tighter, "And so are you."
"It's all thanks to you," the girl muttered, hiding her face under her long hair.
"To you both"
She was shaking uncontrollably, but her voice sounded relieved if anything. Jake comforted her with the same gentleness he used with you, not putting too much pressure in his hug- ever so kind. You glanced over Lilly, biting her nail anxiously, and you thought that, considering her indecisiveness, it would be wise to offer her some help.
Settling your hand on her shoulder, you guided the blonde girl to her siblings.
"I know you want it, too" you mumbled to her ear, noticing her surprise.
Lilly was about comment but she didn't have the time for it, because Hannah, sensing her sister coming closer, smirked and grabbed her sister's arm so that she could join in the hug, too.
"H-Hannah!" Lilly said hastily, glaring at her in a menacing way.
"Come on, don't be so uptight! I know deep down you have a heart!" Hannah teased, ruffling her sister's locks.
Lilly huffed not so quietly in her sister's face, but she dropped the act once Jake brought her closer to him. In all of this, he remained silent, but his eyes were telling all there was to know about his current mood: he was happy.
"At last, we have finally met." He sighed, watching what remained of his family fight for the best position in the group hug.
As you observed them from afar, you couldn't help but smile wide, a wave of warmness washing you over. They were so cute, truly united for the first time in their lives: the past month had been hard for all of them for different reasons, but alas, they were able to find reconciliation- they knew the truth, and they were together.
Perhaps, that was your real accomplishment in all of this story- rifting a bond that was never meant to be broken.
After a good while Jake let the girls loose and cleared his voice, still hoarse and guttural from sleeping. "I think I owe you an explanation."
"You sure do! I have many questions," Hannah said, sitting on one of the armchairs. Jake locked gazed with you and signaled to participate in the conversation as well, which you obliged to, laying down next to him. Without the sisters noticing, you lovingly brushed his good shoulder to remind him you were there for him and that he could count on you, whenever he needed. He shivered under your touch but looked otherwise unfazed.
"There is one thing I would like to know," Hannah blurted out, her nails tapping gently on the wood of the surface.
"What is it?" Jake said, curious.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
Jake's expression changed drastically in a span of 2 seconds.
"Hannah..."
"I-I know it's hard to tell the truth. Me more than anyone should know." she reflected, her tone wavering a bit.
"But why did you think I wouldn't be able to handle it?"
"I never thought you were unable to overcome the truth, Hannah. I know how strong you really are." He reasoned, avoiding his sister's glacial stare.
Under the table, you grabbed his callous hand and squeezed it hard. He exhaled quietly and squeezed your hand back.
"I just- I just didn't want to ruin your family."
"You could never." She retorted, her eyes sparkling with emotion. Lilly wasn't an active part of the conversation, but you could see from her reaction that she was feeling the same as her sister.
"You don't know that, Hannah. I wasn't going to risk your happiness over it."
A tear slipped away and fell on her cheek. She tried to catch it quick, but she wasn't fast enough: it ceremoniously splashed onto the table, as a mocking reminder.
"I'm sorry." Jake mumbled, ashamed of himself. You grazed the back of his hand in circle patterns hoping that could soothe him, but you doubted you could singlehandedly resolve his internal turmoil.
"I t-think" Hannah tried to explain, but her voice broke in a sob. Lilly instantly got closer and patted her back, now becoming emotional just like her big sister. It was nice seeing her this affectionate instead of her usual reserved demeanor.
"I think I would have preferred the truth instead of being ghosted"
Jake physically stirred, his hands sweating cold now- you could clearly see he was putting all of his might into finding the right words. This situation would have been hard for anyone, but you also knew how much he struggled with being out in the open-sure, he was capable of being sensitive and honest with you, but that didn't mean he was like that with other people. If you could, you would have gladly took his place- but you recognized that it was important for him to tell his side of the story.
"You can imagine why I did that." He simply responded, but the grip on your hand was harsher, betraying his real mental state.
"Of course I can imagine it. But this doesn't mean I wasn't hurt by it...and it would have spared me a-an heartbreak."
Lilly cornered her, offering a stable shoulder to cry on. Jake was showing signs of remorse, and yet didn't dare to correct himself. Your fingers were starting to hurt but you kept holding it tight. In that moment, he needed you the most.
On the other hand, you also sympathized with Hannah. Poor, unfortunate Hannah: haunted by her past mistake, how alone must she have been all these years, knowing she couldn't confess her crime to any living soul- doomed for seemingly an eternal solitude. She had felt a real, strong connection with Jake, only to be abandoned for reasons she couldn't possibly fathom. Hannah was right, you thought- she could have handled the real reason behind Jake's rejection years ago. Maybe if Jake had stayed with her instead of running away from the responsibility she wouldn't have been fallen prey to Richy.
In hindsight, everything seemed all so evident-but you knew all too well that was not how life worked. You cleared your voice.
"Guys, you all went trough so much in some way or another-and this lead you far apart for different reasons. We can't change the past, unfortunately, but the important thing is that you are here now, and you are together! I bet you both know that you need each other in your lives." You said, setting yourself up as the mediator in this dynamic.
"I think you can acknowledge the pain you caused Hannah," Jake's eyes flickered up, "while you can put yourself in his shoes." You indicated the girl in front of you with your index finger.
"Sometimes life forces us to act in ways we don't always like. Not that we don't have a choice! Just that we are influenced by our surroundings, our loved ones and our past actions...anything really, and this often prevents us to know what's the best for us." You elaborated, hoping your speech could make some sense.
"But we can learn to be better. To choose better. To ask the others' opinion.
And I-I think you are already doing it. It can only be better from this point forward."
You concluded, bowing your head in embarrassment. They were all watching you, and their intensity was truly unmatched- you felt a bit overwhelmed, so much so that you started second guessing yourself. Were you a bit too cheesy just now? Were they going to take you seriously?
Then Jake caressed your palm with his thumb, and that was all you needed to return vigilant.
"You are right. We've become better people-I know I did." He confirmed, softly.
"If it wasn't for you I don't think I would be here today."
"Well, me either!" Hannah joked, to which you all chuckled.
"But I get what you mean...We have to be more open to communication." She continued, nodding to your way.
"For example, Hannah and I know your identity. But we don't know if you want to tell our father, too. Would you like to meet him?" Lilly proposed to her brother, returning to her seat.
Jake suddenly left your hand.
"I..."
Since you had met him (which, to be fair, it wasn't that long, but still) you had never seen him being so bewildered.
His eyeballs were vacant, not focused on anything in particular; his upper limbs were resting awkwardly in the air.
He evidently didn't expect this question, and even more so, he hadn't occurred to him that this could have been considered a valid request. Your heart throbbed painfully, the image of that cursed man flashing in your head: his terrible humor, his sexism, his annoying way of speaking… you felt the excruciating need to punch Nathan Donfort in the face.
"I don't think that would be a good idea." He expressed, his knuckles white from clenching his fists so hard.
The sister duo simultaneously frowned.
"Is there a reason for it?" Hannah asked, cautiously.
"I would rather have him stay in the dark. I don't think...I don't want him to be a part of my life." He responded, his voice barely audible.
"Okay, we won't tell him." Lilly promised quickly, catching up Jake's uneasiness.
Then, out of the blue, the smile on her face turned to a mischievous grin.
"You know, it's funny" she pointed out, crossing her arms to her chest. For some reason, you just knew she up to no good.
"It is?" Jake asked, still on edge after his sister's proposition.
"It's very funny, actually. MC fought hard so that we wouldn't tell our parents about you, and she said the same things as you are now."
"Ah!-" you blurted out, surprised Lilly was dragging you into this conversation. You blushed by just thinking about that day, when you so aggressively attacked Hannah for almost confessing to their parents the truth about Jake. Thinking it rationally, you should have approached the subject matter in a different way, instead of ganging up on her; you didn't regret your choice per se, but the execution left to be desired.
"...Really?" Jake questioned you directly, but you were too much of a coward to confront him about it. You felt his fingertips hovering over your thigh and that made you even more bashful than before.
"T-that's-"
"Yes, really, and not just about this topic, you know? She keeps nagging us about you all the time!" Lilly doubled, unable to contain her smirk.
"Please don't say this, please don't tell them that! Jake wouldn't approve! Ugh, it was a lot." She complained lightheartedly, to which Hannah replied: "That's true! She never missed the opportunity to defend you. You may have been absent, but you weren't forgotten."
"It was very romantic, but also kinda too cheesy for my taste"
"Girls-" you clumsily stuttered, as you were too overwhelmed to explain yourself. Lilly was satisfied about your flustered state, grinning like a cartoon villain- was this an elaborate scheme to ridicule you in front of Jake?! Either way, it was really embarrassing!
"That's... that's very nice of you." You felt Jake moving towards your figure, only to have his arm encircle your waist.
Suddenly redder, you faced him, and quietly gasped when you realized how much love was contained in his eyes.
"Thank you, MC. I'm immensely grateful for your care in everything you do."
His smile was making your head spin and your heartbeat accelerate. He really was too handsome, too suave for your own good. You wished you could respond in some meaningful way, something profound and staggering like he deserved, but nothing came to mind. Words seemed to fail, but maybe...
You rapidly kissed his cheek. It lasted no more than a second and your skin barely touched his’, but that didn't matter, as long as the intention was set.
Jake didn't even have the time to react.
"I knew it!" Lilly erupted, standing up.
"You are together!"
"We-I mean, ehm-" you blabbered, realizing that technically, you and Jake didn't really talk about your roles in the relationship. Sure, you both confessed your love for one another, but was that enough? Should you have discussed it before? Your heart knew what you wanted to say, but was too scared to assume.
Luckily for you, after a moment of confusion, Jake took action, bringing your hand to his mouth to kiss your fingers softly, his eyes closed- and in response you squirmed in your chair, flabbergasted. Last thing you would have ever guessed was Jake being bold and openly affectionate in front of people.
His lips pecked you gently, light as a feather, and yet they sent you a burning jolt down your spine. Behind your fingers, you could distinguish a hint of a grin: you kept challenging each other to see who could break down first, and it was all fun and games when you were the one in control, but to be on the receiving end was simply unbearable. If Hannah and Lilly hadn't been there, you wouldn't have hesitated to strike back.
"I would say we are." Jake agreed, intertwining his fingers with yours.
"Finally!" Lilly had to say.
"Took you long enough! You should have seen them while they were searching for you, Hannah! They kept drooling over each other."
"W-we were very professional!" You yelled, gritting your teeth.
"Whatever you say, lovebird"
Hannah elbowed her sister's stomach to shut her up for good. She crawled inward in pain, but kept her insults to herself.
"I'm so glad you found someone for you, Jake. I just know you and MC are a perfect match" Hannah expressed, her vision fixated on your clasped hands.
You watched them yourself in disbelief: just a day prior, you would have never suspected you could ever be in this fortunate position. His hand, bigger and rougher, clashed harmoniously with yours and even like this, you felt safe and sheltered; you knew he wouldn't have allowed anything bad to happen to you.
Never in your life someone had sworn to protect you, never in your life someone had actually done it. Just this notion was driving you nuts, but it was real.
It was all real.
"I'm glad too. I've never been so happy in my life, Hannah. Thank you for leading her to me." "It was all accidental, but I'll claim it anyway!" She chirped.
"I can't wait to hang out more, even though you'll probably be the most annoying, lovey-dovey couple of all time" she bantered, faking disgust towards you two.
"I'm afraid it won't happen any time soon." Jake lamented, regaining his cold and emotionless tone.
"Is the FBI still tracking you down?" Lilly dared to guess.
"It's complicated." Jake stated.
"I can't say for sure that they all have fallen in my trap, but at least I know most of the FBI agents aren't in Duskwood anymore."
"How so?" Lilly inquired, genuinely concerned.
"Yeah, how so?" You insisted, picking up Lilly's preoccupied mood. The last thing you wanted was for Jake to be caught just because he refused to leave you now that you had bumped into each other.
Jake noticed your emotional shift.
"None of you has to worry. I watched carefully the swats leave the city and only then I returned to this place. Of course, I don't really know if they all got out, but I can safely confirm that the most troublesome agents did." Your mind drifted to the day before, and to be more precise, when you had asked Alan if he had any news regarding Jake: he didn't know where he was, but you did recall him mentioning the FBI leaving Duskwood. In a moment of panic you had forgotten about this key detail.
"Okay, but how were you able to elude them?" Lilly probed.
"It wasn't easy." He admitted, "But, long story short, I've paid someone to hide traceable devices I've previously used in two different locations, and to turn them on every once in a while, in slightly different places. One of this devices is in a train right now to Colville, while the other is an another city altogether." Jake explicated, and you knew he was attempting to find the easiest words so that even tech-savvy ignorants like you three could understand.
“Devices like…?” Hannah pondered. “Old phones I don’t use anymore.” He replied, “I have many of them, they make it harder to track me.” Hannah seemed a bit confused, but nodded anyway.
"Basically, my plan is to mislead them. I want them to think that I'm already outside of Duskwood, so that escaping from here isn't such a threatening prospect anymore."
"Why do you need two devices?" Hannah questioned.
"Isn't one enough?"
"Not necessarily. If there's one thing I've learned from my life on the run, is that the FBI tends to be arrogant. Once they think they have seen trough a trick they don't suspect there to be another one." He analyzed.
"I've made sure the device located near Colville seem like a decoy rig by turning it on for more time, while the second device appears like a fatal "accident" on my part by turning it on just once and not for more than 5-10 minutes. This way most agents are following this second track, while also splitting some of their forces on the Colville's device."
"...that's very smart." Your only comment, and Jake delightfully chuckled.
"I told you they wouldn't separate me from you."
"So for how long will you stay here?" Hannah asked.
Jake suddenly looked extremely guilty.
"I should have left the city already."
"Oh..."
Deep down you knew the illusion couldn't last forever.
Yesterday Jake wasn't rushing to his Motel room because he couldn't wait to sleep on a comfortable bed for once, but because he finally had the occasion to escape from Duskwood while retrieving all his personal belongings and he would have done so, if it wasn't for you.
You had tried to ignore this uneasy feeling the day before, and until now you had managed to suppress it: may it be because Jake felt like a blessing from above, you had almost forgotten he was still a wanted man.
Almost.
The Donfort sisters weren't able to conceal their disappointment as well as you did, but regardless, they promised they weren't going to lose contact for a second time. They wanted to have Jake in their lives, no matter how little involvement he could factually have- even just chatting was enough, and Jake was ready to oblige.
After some boring small talk, Hannah and Lilly decided to leave your room- they hugged you one last time and then Jake guided them towards the exit.
You both stayed silent for some time elaborating what had just happen- Jake seemed to expect you to take the lead, but your head was still stuck to that shameful sentiment pervading your soul. As you left the living room to change your clothes, you thought deeply about the current situation: you didn't want to pressure Jake into staying with you, even if he really desired to remain by your side, even if you hadn’t asked him to: his safety was your priority.
Once you got out of the bathroom, you noticed Jake on the top of the bed, typing some elaborate code you couldn't really identify on his laptop. You approached him.
"Hey, what are you up to?"
He fixed his glasses on the tip of his nose.
"I'm instructing my collaborators to move my devices farther away. I'm trying to buy myself extra time." You bit your lip.
"Jake...If you staying here puts you in danger then you should go. I understand."
For a moment you could only hear the sound of the keyboard clicking frenetically. It was pleasant, in a way; it reminded you of those asmr videos.
"I don't want to leave you alone right now."
Jake uttered, his focus on the screen.
"Why not? I can manage, you know. You would have to anyway."
"Yesterday you had a breakdown." You were left speechless. He was right, of course, but he couldn't just put his safety into jeopardy because of that.
"Well I mean-"
"You shouldn't be left alone to deal with this. I know you have your friends, but I fear you are not being totally honest with them. Even during our investigation, you kept your burden just between us. " he spoke, closing his laptop.
"Also, I’ve deduced that I personally put you trough a lot of pain by going to the mine."
You gulped audibly.
"I know you wanted to protect me, which you did, but...b-but yeah, it was an emotional rollercoaster." Just by thinking about that day your eyes were becoming watery.
"I know. Although I don't regret my choices, I'm incredibly sorry I keep being a source of torment."
You didn't respond. After all, even if you would have never personally defined Jake as a source of torment, he did make you go trough hell by going to Grimrock. Life wasn't a movie, romantic gestures like sacrificing your own life for your loved one wasn't really a wholesome experience to go trough. It would possibly take a lot more than one night to forget this traumatic incident, but for now, you could fill the void with something good.
"I would like to take you out this night." Jake broke the silence, offering you a tender smile. "Really?!" You yelled, excited for this unexpected turn of events.
"Yes. I cannot afford anything too grandiose right now, but I still hope you are gonna like it." He cutely hid his face in his hood, probably hiding his pinkish cheeks. You jumped on your feet.
"I don't care about grandiose! I know It will be special because you will be with me" not thinking rationally, you launched yourself in his arms, euphoric. He wasn't prepared, but he was able to catch you on time.
"-Agh!"
"Sorry, sorry! I'm just..." it was true, he needed to depart soon-but he still thought about your needs and desires. You weren't going to take his decision for granted.
"I'm happy"
Jake nuzzled his nose against your neck.
"I am too, MC. I'll have to leave by tonight, but until then, I wish our first encounter to be memorable."
Your arms rested on his back and, careful to not hurt the injured shoulder, you let wander your digits. For a moment, all was well.
"Until then it is."
---------‐-----------------------------------
Promising Jake you would have returned to the Motel by 8 pm, you took off and reached Jessy's place, just like you had originally intended. She was waiting for you in her cute pink pajama, her hair resembling a bramble patch and her eye bags prominent- you immediately felt remorseful for abandoning her, especially now that you could witness her poor conditions.
She greeted you on her doorstep with a plastered, fake smile and invited you in. Her house reflected Jessy's state of mind: littered, junk food scattered across the floor, and a big pile of dirty clothes laying around. You gulped.
"I'm sorry for not coming sooner" you apologized, removing with your feet a cardboard pizza box "I knew you were struggling, and yet..."
She waved off your self-pitiful party.
"I told you I was fine" Jessy blocked you when you started picking up the trash from the floor. "You don't really look fine"
"I wouldn't have looked fine regardless of your presence. it's okay." You disposed the trash in the bin and followed her steps.
She sat on her sofa, and you did the same. It was pretty comfy, probably even better than the Motel's bed: if only you had known, you would have asked Jessy to sleep at her house on the get go, considering she also didn't want to be alone in this trying times. Not that you really regretted how the last night went...
Now sitting closer to Jessy, you studied her: she seemed tired, even though she had slept the entire morning, judging by her appearance-she didn't even bother dressing up for you (not that it mattered, to be frank. You just hoped she wasn't letting herself go). Her eyes were puffy, mascara staining her pale skin; she still managed to look beautiful, but her joyful spirit was amiss- and you were scared it wasn't coming back.
"So...how was the night?"
"It was...it was a lot" she rambled, covering herself with a patchwork blanket.
"I didn't expect Paul to be at the precinct..."
"Me either," you cooed "Tough luck."
"Yeah...Makes you guess what I did in my previous life to deserve this."
Jessy threw the cover over your legs to distract you from her upcoming tears.
"We didn't deserve this. None of us did. It just...happened." you verbalized, timidly.
Jessy dried her eyes vigorously in a bland attempt to stop her from crying.
"I honestly don't know, MC. Do you know why Paul was at the police?" She didn't give you the time to respond "He went to ask when they were going to give his son's body to the funeral home."
You kept your mouth shut, unable to say anything. Somehow acknowledging that Richy, the mechanic boy who liked to make everybody laugh, was resting lifeless in a mortuary refrigerator, was a wild concept to grasp. It didn't feel legit.
But it was to Jessy, who had to clutch tight the fabric of the cover to even pronounce these words to you.
"When will the funeral...?"
"Tomorrow, actually" She showed you the official message on the company's website. You knitted your eyebrows.
"Should I even go?"
"Of course! You deserve to mourn, too."
Words were struggling to come by. Did you really deserve to mourn him? Did he even see you as a friend, despite your very presence leading him to his doom? You didn't know. Maybe you didn't even want to know.
Jake had reminded you that, in the end, you were just doing what was best for the circumstance. You couldn't have known the half of Hannah's and Richy's backstory, or the man's troubled mental health.
You just knew that he didn't want to come to this conclusion.
And perhaps, it meant that in another life, he would have been a good friend to you. It didn't matter that you couldn't prove it, nor that it was just a theory: you chose to believe it.
Tired of talking about only Richy, Jessy opted for a more frivolous matter.
"Is Jake okay?" Your lips quirked up.
"He is certainly doing better, yes"
Jessy stared at you with a strange sparkle in her eyes. For a moment, you were reminded of another girl, a blond, spunky girl with mischievous intentions.
"Really?" You sneakily remarked, punching gently her arm.
"Did you have a fun night?" Jessy asked, feigning innocence by hiding her mouth with her palm. "We didn't even kiss Jessy, chill!"
The redhead faked offence upon hearing your words.
"What? Are you seriously saying that you ditched me for nothing?"
"We talked about ourselves-"
"MC, please. I know you both can't wait to get in each other pants! As if it wasn't painfully obvious in the chats already."
You drifted to the prior evening, to the many times you thought you were about to get physical only for distractions to take over. The impellent urge to be intimate with him was slowly but surely growing stronger every second, and you doubted you could keep resisting at this pace.
Pictures of Jake's hands on your body pervaded your brain to the point you could almost feel the arousal forming between your legs: his strong arms around your waist lowering towards your core, his chest pressed against yours, his legs trapping you underneath... what kind of sounds could you poke out of him, you pondered. Would he be gentle, like he always treated you, or would he be rougher while in the mood? Did he even find you attractive the same way you found him?
"....And you are thinking about him" Jessy giggled, waking you up from your little trance. "I wasn't-I was just-" you quickly gave up, your excuse visibly weak.
"Okay, fine, you didn't get laid" if you could have disappeared in your seat you would have done so, "But like...are you officially a couple now?"
You sighed, relieved the conversation was switching to a more vanilla subject.
"We are. He's my boyfriend."
It was weird saying it out loud, but so satisfying at the same time. Through out the investigation you weren't so sure the relationship was going to work out: after all, Jake tended to be reclusive and distant, he kept specifying he couldn't be what you wanted him to be and well, for a while you had accepted that. However, the more time you spent talking, the more you were drawn closer; by the end of the journey, you weren't able to see your future without him-and the same went for Jake.
"I'm so happy for you, MC." Jessy beamed, sincerely.
"You know, you are the only good thing that came out of this mess. Not just for me, but for everybody. We were able to put our differences aside and fight for the cause" she credited you.
"I don't even want to imagine what we would have done without you. Heck, we probably would still be at the beginning. You truly saved us. Thank you, MC."
What an idiot you had been, for thinking that the group would have been mad at you. All those guilty feelings didn't even have a reason to exist! How could you have doubted them so much? They were the ones who had fought for your safety. They were the ones who didn't want to see you in danger, even though everybody at the time had been a victim of a potential aggression: they didn't harbor any hatred towards you. You were their savior and most of all, you were their friend. No one regretted meeting you. They loved you- and you loved them.
"Quit being so sappy, you'll make me cry" you whined, picking up the TV remote.
"Do you want to watch a movie? We can watch a horror movie, I know you like those." You said, opening her Netflix account.
"I've had enough of horrors. Why not a comedy?"
The afternoon flew by, the sounds of your laughter echoing in the living room, and with pop corn's crumbs all over the couch's pillows. While Jessy wasn't paying attention you tided up her place little by little, but every once in a while she caught you with the trash can, throwing away tin foil boxes and empty bottles. She pretended to be annoyed, but you could glance her faint smile under her red locks, so you knew she was secretly grateful for your behavior.
You had forgotten how nice it was to hang out with a friend: the past month you only focused on finding Hannah, disregarding any social hang out, your priority set straight.
Looking back, you wished you did spend some quality time with your people without the pressure of failing, or the government agents hacking your phone, or a masked man threatening to kill you.
Tomorrow you were attending a funeral, but today you had chosen to be pursue your happiness.
‐------------------------------------------
At 7:55 pm you rushed over the Motel's entrance, your breathing ragged and with aching feet. You had so much fun with Jessy that you had completely lost track of time, which was good, but also a total disaster from your part: knowing Jake was taking you out, you had mentally prepared a more proper attire- nothing too special, just an outfit that suited your body shape and a little retouch in your makeup, but alas, you hadn't checked your phone enough to realize you weren't going to make it.
Pushing the door open, you quickly spotted Jake standing in front of the counter, juggling with his backpack-now full to the brim with his equipment. Miss Walter was scolding him about an issue that only became coherent once you stepped closer:
"Listen boy, you can't just disappear without telling us! I thought something bad happened! You know how much trouble I would have gone trough if that was the case?!"
Jake was pathetically trying to find some excuse, but kept stammering, possibly thrown off by the lady's expansive personality.
"Miss Walter, forgive him, he is not good with words" You meddled, stealing the spotlight. The woman's face lightened up upon recognizing you. She guffawed, misinterpreting your real intention.
"I see! You are back together! Aww, I'm so glad for you dear! " Jake shared a confused look on his face, but he preferred to stay silent to not ruin your rescue mission.
"I'm still sorry for yesterday, it was, uhm, what can I say...insensitive of me" Miss Walter regretted, reminiscing your little outburst- you felt tempted to reveal it was just an innocent white lie, but complicating your version wasn't a smart choice.
"No hard feelings, curiosity must have taken over” the woman sympathetically smiled.
"Then I guess I'll leave you be, my dears!"
Placing your hand on his arm, you dragged Jake out of the scene, but he decided to speak only after you left the building.
"I fear I'm missing some context."
You huffed playfully, gripping his arm a tad harder.
"Nothing too important, don't worry." You huffed for real now, "I'm sorry, I'm late..." He looked at you with a puzzled expression.
"You're punctual."
"I mean, yeah, I am, but I had planned to come a little early. I didn't want to go out dressed like this."
His piercing stare scanned your frame, searching for something to address; there wasn't an ounce of lust in his eyes and yet you felt your cheeks warming up, and not for the summer temperature.
"I don't see the problem."
"There isn't, just...I don't know, I wanted to dress a little nicer, make myself prettier. Girl stuff, you know."
He lifted your hand from his forearm to hold it tightly, his thumb caressing softly the back in a circle pattern.
"But you're already so beautiful."
Taken aback, you ugly chortled- the date had just started, and Jake was immediately on the attack line with flatteries- he had sworn the day before that he would have loved to give you more compliments, and he sure wasn't backing down.
"You are the handsome one between the two of us," you counter attacked, gleefully. "Me?" Jake questioned, surprised. You eye rolled to the sky.
"Please, don't play dumb now. I'm not saying you are handsome because I like you. Well, I am, but also because you are objectively gorgeous. It's not up to debate."
Jake hid his head inside the hood like a ostrich in the sand.
"You're the first person telling me that."
Your eyebrow would have reached the clouds if it could-you weren't buying any of that bullshit (not that no one ever told him, after all, he rarely talked to anyone- just that no one in his life had found him at least pretty), although for all you knew, he could've had a major glow up in his twenties that no living soul had the pleasure to witness. Also, he didn't seem the type to care about his looks, anyway.
"And I'll say it until you have it engrained in your head!"
"Okay." He chuckled.
Jake explained that crowded, tourist's roads were best to be avoided, as he wasn’t to sure if the FBI was still monitoring the security cameras. The agents didn't have a complete hold of his physical appearance, he reassured you, but they could have recognized him regardless because of his clothes and bag. For a good 5 minutes you insisted on buying him substitutes, but he was stubborn and kept refusing your help. "I don't want to be a weight. ", he repeated like a broken record, "I can take care of it myself"; he simply dismissed the issue, and no matter how many times you protested, he hold his ground. In the end, you had to give up.
As a small victory for yourself, you paid his dinner, twice in a row: while crossing the road, you happened to see a hot dog vendor grilling his meat, humming happily a tune you had never heard of. Jake tentatively looked for some spared coins in his pants, but you were quicker- you bought the whole meal, French fries and beverages.
The hot dog was average, but surprisingly the potatoes were delicious- perfectly oiled and crunchy and Jake was pleased as well, after his initial reluctance.
After walking for a good while, you found yourself in a familiar place, a place you already visited…sort of.
“I know where we are!” you screamed, scaring the poor birds resting on the branches. Jake appeared delighted by your surprise.
“Yes, Jessica showed you the Swarzwasser lake not long ago.” He recalled, examining the area.
Among everything you had seen in Duskwood, this corner of paradise had to take the cake: it was quiet, peaceful, uncontaminated. The sun was setting just above the water's surface, gifting the lake an other worldly aura similar to fantasy books' illustrations. Jake sat on a tree trunk near the river bank and for a moment, it was almost like he belonged in the scenery. A beautiful man for a beautiful view.
He gestured you to lay next to him.
"This has been one of my hiding spots." He broke the silence, "No one seems to come here, not even Duskwood residents."
"It's probably due to the lack of a marked trail," you theorized, "At first I thought we were going to get lost" He shook his head in disagreement.
"I wouldn't take you somewhere I don't know." Jake mumbled, kicking the pebbles into the lake.
"I remember thinking about you a lot that day. I wanted to contact you the second I got out of the mine, but it was too dangerous. The night I didn't even manage to sleep, I was too worried about you."
"About me?" You asked, incredulous. Flickering images of that fateful day poisoned you, triggering your already frail heart.
"Yes. I wondered if you were going to be okay. If the culprit was being arrested. If you still wanted to stay by my side."
"Is that even a question?" Your head fell on his shoulder. "I love you. I can't imagine my life without you anymore." Jake's arm wrapped around your waist, just like in the morning with Hannah and Lilly. It felt reassuring, it felt like home.
"I'm sorry, MC. I'm not doubting you, not after everything we went trough. I'm used of being alone, and it's hard dealing with these emotions."
Anticipation grew in your chest, like it always did when Jake talked about his past. You couldn't help it, even if you knew how hard it was for him to speak up about his upbringing, you still longed to know more. The crumbs he provided weren't fulfilling your thirst of knowledge.
Swallowing your insecurity, you begged.
"Have you always been alone?"
Jake didn't have to answer for you were already apologizing.
"Sorry, forget what I said! You don't have to tell me anything you don't want- I don't know why I-" "I can tell you."
He wasn't looking at you, his gaze concentrated on the horizon. From outside, it seemed that it was taking him all of his willpower to remain stoic and unbothered- but a trained eye could spot all the subtle signes: his clenched jaw, his wobbly posture, the sweat on his hands...it all indicated his pent-up anxiety.
"You don't have to-"
"I want to tell you. It's safer in real life."
He justified himself, his limb dragging you closer.
"I...I grew up with my mother."
Oh.
"She was hard-working, and passionate, and kind. She had two different jobs to pay the rent and to take care of me."
His voice seeped love, you promptly took notice: it was rare for Jake to be visibly and emotionally engaged, but for once, when he talked about his mom, he was just like everybody else. If anything, it resembled when he was talking about you.
"She did the best she could to assure me a good life. She bought me toys instead of something nice for herself, she made sure I could go to decent and respectable schools, and she always encouraged my passions. At my eleventh birthday she gifted me my first computer, and I remember being furious at her." He smiled, bitterly.
"We've always struggled with money, but my mother would have rather risked her financial stability for me. No matter how many times I was mad at her, she would just pretend that everything was fine and she persevered with her reckless behavior. She kept drumming in my ears how intelligent I was, and that if I were born in a ‘normal’, stable family I would have been able to live an extraordinary life. But I never wished to have an extraordinary life, I just wished my mom would stop dragging herself down."
Your hand caressed softly his back. He was sharing more than you thought he was willing to offer, which made you wonder how much he repressed his feelings. It was gut wrenching.
"I was never good at socializing, but you probably guessed that already. Even at school I had a hard time. I...I didn't know how to read other people, I still don't. This was always apparent to anyone around me."
"Were you bullied for this?..." you vocalized, your heart beating in your throat.
"I wouldn't define it as bullying. I was left out, but in their defense, I wasn't eager to participate in their activities as well. I preferred enjoying my free time alone. Although I did miss the pleasure of a companion, occasionally."
He sighed, while his fingers brushed the skin your shirt wasn't able to cover.
"At 15 I joined an hacktivist group. I was always political involved due to my mother and our background, and I desperately wanted to help her in any way possible. I was promised that with our actions it was also possible to earn some money, money I would gave to her in secret."
His expression changed, and the grip on your shirt was so vigorous that you feared he could tear the fabric apart. Alas, you said nothing.
"In the end, it proved to be useless. My mother...she was strong, but the life in her was drained from the moment she birthed me. It was only a matter of time until she couldn't bear it anymore."
You feared where this was going.
"One day I woke up and...she didn't. I was barely an adult and I didn't expect this to happen. I never received any kind of help, just like my mother didn't receive any when she had me, and worse, for the world it was better if the scum got rid by itself. From that point forward, I only focused on my work. I was angry for what society did to my mother and I wanted someone to pay."
He let go your shirt once he realized he was about to broke it. He whispered a feeble "sorry" and continued to narrate his trauma.
"Years passed, but my hatred didn't. I had managed to befriend other hackers in the community thanks to our similar environment-I had told them a bit about my past, and they opened up to me, too. They were the closest thing to a friend I've ever had, and together we often attacked whoever wronged us commoners: the police, politicians, companies."
To distract himself from the painful memories he toyed with the pebbles on the river bank, but his reflection on the water allowed you to see his hollow, dazed stare: if he wasn't so intent on describing his story, you would have hopped in his arms so that he could have known he wasn't alone anymore. That he had a girlfriend ready to love him, cherish him, worship him. But Jake wasn't over explaining.
"4 years ago, we uncovered something huge: something that would have put the FBI in a tight spot, a scandal so big that the whole country would have been in shambles.
I was determined to shed light on the truth publicly, but, apparently, my "friends" had other plans. The FBI was able to reach out to them offering a conspicuous amount of cash in exchange of the hacker who was able to breach into the governmental protective walls."
He remained silent, and you did too.
"In just one night, I've lost my house, my identity, my friends...Since then I've been on the run and I don't think that's going to end soon."
Truthfully, you didn't know how to proceed. Jake had been so brave, telling you all these private, heartbreaking anecdotes- you weren't even sure if you were processing all these informations correctly, but you recognized that by confessing his past, he was putting his trust into your hands. He had been betrayed by life, and yet he still decided to love and to be loved once more.
"It must have been so hard" it was a bit banal to say, but you felt too overwhelmed to elaborate further.
"Not so much once you get used to it." He turned to face you, tenderly. His eyes met yours to find the haven he longed to be in.
"But it will be different now, thanks to you. I didn't realize how miserable I felt before meeting you. For years I thought that it didn't matter that I wasn't happy as long as I could do what was right."
Your vision was becoming hazy, but you fought hard to prevent the tears from escaping. This moment wasn't about you, and yet metabolizing Jake's experiences was proving to be challenging: how could he just stand there, seemingly detached, while regurgitating the foulest details from his past. Why did he, among all people, had to endure such tragedies. It wasn't right. It wasn't fair.
"You deserve to be happy, Jake. It makes me so mad that you had to suffer so much, that you were left alone." You said, wavering.
"That's also partially my own fault, MC. I stranded away from people on purpose"
Why was he so ready to shift the blame onto himself?! It was a pervasive pattern of his. He blamed himself for the FBI hacking you, for leaving you after Lilly had endangered you both, and now this.
"Now don't say that." You spewed, nearly hissing.
"I may not know everything about your life, but still, what you gave me is enough to paint a picture, okay? You couldn't rely on anyone because when you did you got b-burned"
Your voice broke, as you weren't able to conceal your emotions no more. Your eyeballs were prickling far too much but you gritted your teeth, and tightened your fists.
"So, well, what I'm trying to say is-stop blaming yourself."
"MC."
Jake slouched in your direction, a pained expression colored his visage.
"Yeah?"
"You're getting worked up."
"Yeah."
"Why?"
Your hands found their way on top of his', and you held them like you'd hold an abandoned bird with a broken wing: gently, fearing that with every touch you could hurt it. Stroking his bruised fingers, you cleared your mind and voiced your thoughts.
"Because It angers me that no one did it for you before. It angers me that the man I love was treated so cruelly by life. And it doesn't help that you keep sacrificing yourself as if you didn't care about your own life, but I do. I-it's unbearable to watch! You have to realize that you can't just put yourself in mortal peril as if it didn't matter! You matter, and you matter to me! You are all that I desire and all I ever want"
You grouped all four hands in a praying position.
"I promise I'll do my best to make you happy, Jake. I want to give you all my love and even more. You deserve it."
You looked up, unsure if your little speech was even remotely acceptable- only to be confronted with a reaction you truly didn't expect. Jake was teary-eyed, his mouth partly opened but even so, he didn't emit a single sound. Among his many unfortunate occurrences, it was very telling that his last straw was someone declaring her undying love for him. You climbed in his lap, longing for contact, while your thumb operated to sweep away the single tear rolling on his skin.
"Hey...I didn't want to make you cry"
He twisted his head to press his mouth to your fingers.
"I'm not upset."
Hesitantly, you drew closer. Jake had to make space to accommodate you, his legs becoming a nice and comforting seatback. The tremor beneath you tickled your interest momentarily (the trunk wasn't so stable, you discovered), but you were too concentrated on the man in front of you.
"When was the last time you cried?"
"I can't recall."
"You can cry with me. Not long ago I said I wanted to help you when you were going trough stuff. I meant it"
"I told you, MC. I'm not upset." Jake said, piling up excuses.
"Well I get you are not upset, but you're still feeling a lot, clearly." You highlighted, then threw your hypothesis.
"Are you not used to kind words?"
He cackled, removing a strand of hair from your face.
"Not so much."
"Then this will change, okay? I want to compliment you as much as I can, everyday."
Without warning, he hugged you tight against him, his forehead flopping against your shoulder. For once, you felt like his anchor, an unmovable force he could rely on.
"Thank you, MC. Thank you so much." His voice sounded desperate and relieved at the same time. "Don't thank me for this, Jake. As your girlfriend, that's the least I can do"
Suddenly, the mood shifted. Jake grew stiffer, his arms squeezing your waist pleasantly and seductively and his nose, buried on your neck, sparkled your desire to touch him, taste him, please him. Between yesterday and today, you kept teasing each other to see who would have been the first to fall prey on their instincts, too prideful to give in, and yet so tormented by the craving. You pondered: Who was going to surrender? Who was going to take the initial bite? This game of catch was near the end. He moved your hair to the side, and whispered in your ear:
"I still can't believe it. I can't believe you want me to be yours."
His husky voice was irresistible, but you had to reiterate.
"But It's real, Jake. I want you, and only you."
Finally, there was a winner. Jake abruptly separated himself from you, only to return stronger and fervent: his lips smacked against yours.
It was a passionate kiss that contained all the unsaid, all the love that couldn't be communicated with words. It was electrifying, bold, sensual; you had never felt more alive.
His hands ventured around your body, hitting all the sensitive spots with the right amount of pressure while your fingers were busy in his raven hair, pulling the locks to let him know whenever you particularly liked some of his moves. Every time you parted to breathe was excruciating, as if the only air you needed was each other.
You were so focused on the other that you ignored all the signs of the trunk breaking- but you didn't miss the subsequent fall into the lake.
After a moment of confusion, you burst out laughing.
"We should have-Mhp!" You didn't get to finish that Jake was already onto you, lifting you up so that you were at the same height. He resumed his antics by kissing your neck, unconcerned about the frigid water.
You moaned, still out of breath, which prompted him to target the specific sweet spot. "I should have kissed you sooner." He confided, cleaning your face from the leaves.
"Now this will be the only thing I'll think about."
He kissed you once more, this time introducing his tongue to the ring. He licked your lips to gain permission to enter, which you granted, allowing your tongue to play as well. He used it parsimoniously, to your joy, but, most of all, he used it well, causing you to moan again.
"I mean-ah, It's not bad, isn't it?"
His teeth grazed your mouth
"No, but-uhm, I wish it could last longer."
Sensing his discomfort, you stopped.
"M-me too, but...but this isn't over forever. We are gonna see each other again, and we'll do all kinds of stuff. We'll go to more dates, we'll travel, we'll cook, we'll do, well, anything we want!"
You didn't know that. You didn't know what life was going to provide for you. Jake was a wanted man on the run, you were a nobody who got entangled in a mess bigger than yourself.
There were so many ways where this story could go terribly wrong.
"Right?"
Jake kissed you again, but unlike the other times, he was gentle, kind and caring. The typical kiss you see in a Disney movie, after the protagonists triumph against evil and win their happily ever after.
"Of course. I can't evade you, remember?" He said, nonchalantly.
Maybe you could make the story go the right way.
You returned the kiss, your lips smiling just like his'.
You were soaked, and cold, and a bit scared about the future.
But with Jake, even the impossible looked possible.
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Cal Kestis x Kyra Yarmot
'Revenge and Redemption:
In the Name of Love'
Pt.7
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Ayo. It is smut. Yes it is. Like, mostly smut, barely much else. And YES it includes the kinks I talked about at the very start of this journey, much more than the first time too, I think so myself. So thanks for the patience and no questions why both Smut-Parts ended up on chapter 7. I don't know why that happens either.
Uh, also, some fresh "anatomy plotting" for Kaluk coming up, it's a mildly inappropriate feature I gave their females. Okay it's very inappropriate, technically just natural (just not possible for us humans) ...it’s a kink on its own.
Enjoy the porn! :)
Word Count: approx. 4.324 Words Moans
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When you came back, BD almost immediately steered towards the charging pad Cal had fixed up for him on his nightstand, only sharing some trivial words with the two of you as he jumped onto the mattress to shorten his path, leaving you once more virtually all alone with the Ginger Inquisitor and your constant, inappropriate thoughts about him.
"Constantly thinking inappropriately about me, huh?" He asks rather smugly in return as he tilts his head and his body language screamed dominance all of the sudden, caging you against the back of the dark gray couch as he swiftly caught your wrists in his hands. He had a much more dominant aura to himself now against his old self on the Mantis, smirking into your visible surprise.
"Well, how can I not? You always tell me how beautiful I am…but I forget to remind you of how incredibly handsome you are, my love." Your dearest mate, your only mate.
A warm but dark chuckle leaves his chest as he kisses you, a sweet one, surprisingly being not what you expected. You expected him to turn even more smug with you feeling so small under him, it always ended that way, him in control whenever you two became aroused.
"Not smug enough?" He quickly butts in, tilting his head again when now some of his red locks of hair fall to the side. Kark, you loved his hair…
"Tell me what you love about it then, don't make me wait either." Cal requested as he lifted you off the floor, away from the back of the couch and around it, "I love how it looks when you're all disheveled, especially after you ran and the cold wind swept through them." Instinctively, your clawed hands – now much more careful again, with them freshly sharpened – rake through the mentioned full head of hair, feeling the increased softness they now had thanks to much more commonly available care products on Nur than on the Mantis, "and what I love even more is to be able to feel it between my fingers, such a difference to before, like silk…"
He does it in a mix of gentleness and roughness as he lets you fall onto the cushions of the couch, not wasting even a second to join you on them with his legs spread to either side of your thick scaly thighs, caging them in. He knew the privilege he had with you having him as his mate, no other man or woman would ever get this far without getting beaten to a bloody pulp, "You forget though, that's my job. To worship. Your job to look beautiful, quick-witted and dangerous all at once, no struggle ever to convey your rank."
He works on your new uniform's buttons and zippers, the belt that would now hold your Lightsaber flying somewhere into the middle of the room first before he began peeling the black clothing off of your body, careful when he got to the unique design they created for your wings. He needed to make sure you didn't hurt your still healing wing again...
You remember the first time of you two – it being ingrainedto your memory till you died – on Tatooine and how both of your heads were partially so preoccupied with doing everything right that these thoughts nearly overshadowed the incredible, unbound excitement you could read from each other. Not anymore though.
The fear of mistakes stripped as bare as you yourself and soon Cal as well, leaving nothing to the imagination of you two as you could feel and smell the arousal of each other sweeping you off your feet, thank the makers you were already on your ass.
"I also love your…freckles…" you moan, caught off guard when his thoughts still weren’t able to or perhaps didn't want to warn you ahead of time when he began to give much needed attention to your chest, nibbling and biting at them with his not exactly gentle – but still more blunt – teeth. He made sure you didn't want him to be more gentle before continuing though, just barely holding back from his wish to just…ravish your body. "My freckles? They're nothing speci-"
"Each and…every one of them is…unique! Like a personal little…galaxy!" He wasn't making it easy for you to tell him what you thought made him look good- no, breathtaking to you, barely letting up on you as his mouth moved up to your neck. Meamwhile his eager hands resumed what his teeth started, not a second wasted to feel your needy body buckle up against his, his feet clearly not strong enough to weigh down your extremely animated tail as it patted and swiped across the couch, the floor and everywhere it reached – throwing a few water bottles on the coffee table to floor as they stood in its not so clear cut path – as it was a great indicator of your feelings as always.
"You're such a good girl, aren't you? But whose good girl are you, hmm?" He asks with a seductive tone, hovering over you while keeping himself lifted up by his arms, planted steadily next to your shoulders. The couch was far more spacious than it looked, you barely registered such boring facts as you were hardwired to fall in love with him all over again and again when you stared into his golden eyes, shadows falling over them. "Yours, Cal. I'm your good girl…" And it was only him and his one-of-a-kind aura that was able to tame this reckless, wild beast inside of you, he was the only one that would be able to both calm you down and bring you to heights foreign to others, heights even unable for you alone to climb.
"In that case, show don't tell. Show me that you are and get on your knees for me, my obedient little Dragonfly!" He commands, getting off of you with a short push of his arms, beginning to take care of his own uniform as you didn't even question his order. And why the hell would you? Cal was the most trusted person in your small – yet way too big to understand – world, if he had asked you to take a naked swan dive into Nur's Ocean even with that creature out there, you would do it.
"You can't fathom how much your unwavering trust means to me, I haven't seen all of your past and yet I know it has to be an honor…and I trust you as well. With my very life."
Would he command you to jump into this cursed Ocean…
…he wouldn't waste a single moment to also jump in after you.
He truly is your soul – ...force? – mate…
You haven't been long in a comfortable position when you already feel his digits dip into your sensitive folds, a quiver running through your body from your intruded core as you hold your moans back. It was so embarrassing to you that even the slightest touch of his fingers could turn you on so badly…wait.
"Too bad that I can hear these naughty oh so naughty words, sometimes my dragonfly forgets to keep her thoughts to herself, doesn't she?" You're not sure how to react when you suddenly feel one of his hands – with the other deeply preoccupied with tapping into your sweet spot – wrap tightly around one of the two long primary horns on your head, pulling your head back towards him roughly.
"Ah-ahhh! C-cal, wai-"
He stops in his tracks, hearing him gasp at your own elevated reaction as you fail to hold back this time, a long, slightly high-pitched moan fell from your lips, your lower lips squeezing tightly around his intruding middle finger. Cal's months of never-ending intrigue for your horns had overflown today, acting on impulse to go for your horns instead of your hair like last time in your now shared Bedroom.
"...You…you weren't lying back then when you said they're sensitive…karking hell." He curses under his breath when his fingers were basically sucked into your cunt now and his grip showed no sign of loosening up.
But he was still more hesitant than you expected, thoughts of doubt edging themselves into him.
"Should I let go? If you're uncomfortable wit‐" "N-no! Oh my makers, please…please don't!" He couldn't know, not even you had known much about it, only having found the bare minimum. But basically, from what you read…only a Kaluk's mate should be allowed to touch their horns, especially in such a way. It's a deeply personal and affectionate act between mates, reserved to the two that bonded together, "So that's why you stopped me back then?"
Yes, because back then you hadn't yet been aware who Cal would become for you. The highly important spot in your beastly, partially driven by animalistic instincts heart he would take forever, something he would never lose, no matter what happened between you two.
Even if he would someday break your heart…it would mend, time and time again... no matter what the right or sane choice would've been to a person that had their head and heart on straight. It would continue aching for him, even if his human one would one day no longer feel the same for you.
Abandonment had once almost ruined your trust in life.
Now it would drive you mad, the three months apart from him had nearly gotten you to that point, every day your thoughts drifting to how you wished you could just eviscerate every single one of the assholes that manned the Mantis. It got worse every night, rivaling your sadness and sorrow.
"That won't happen, love. Look at us, we will go through everything together, the good and especially the bad. I promised that. Now, let me make my mate feel so good she forgets how to walk..." He…Cal used the word mate? Not girlfriend or lover. Mate.
He is your mate.
You're his mate.
For the first time, he had the chance to touch and feel the unfamiliar, strange texture of your horns, the various layers that grew thicker and stronger over the years the further he got to the base of them, forming them the way they are today. Every Kaluk's horns had been unique in growth and size. And just like your claws, they were…highly sought after, after all, "Dragon People" are carried as nothing but myth today. Just like those of other horned animals, but much worse. His unforgiving pull towards his body forced your cunt to sink automatically onto his now two fingers, a lewd mewl in your throat as he scratched an itch you didn't even know you had.
It wasn't an actual itch of course, it was your burning, primal desire to be touched by him like no other would ever be allowed to. To dishevel your body, ease the bright flame inside of your body, leave you filled to the brim with his-
"You're going to make me cum early with those depraved thoughts of yours, hmmm…you want me to paint your tight, fertile insides or not, Dragonfly?" He threatened, whispering into your ear before leaning back straight, "Tell me how much you want it, come on!"
Kark, you needed him now! Need to feel his-
"Use your karking mouth, I want to hear your voice ring out!" And you realized his next move too late when his now slicked up fingers left your aching cunt, too late to see what he was about to do, the full force impact on your full ass cheek so surprising you couldn't hold back your yelp mixed with a desperate whimper. That felt so karking good…more…
And he gave you exactly what he heard you ask for this time, quick to follow up with another equally harsh slap, sharply echoing through the open living room and kitchen, paired along with your inhuman shrieks of arousal, no human woman can make these sweet sounds, he thought, reveling in them. "Dragonfl-" He began with a tone you hadn't heard before, he never sounded more…threatening, his voice deep as he began to draw out his favorite nickname for you. But he wouldn't have to finish it.
"Please, yes Cal! I need you, I need your hard cock inside of me, kark, I need you to…to…I need you to breed me! Mate with me, Cal!" The ginger inhaled sharply at you finally finding your words – 'and my what for words!' – just a few inches shy of bruising your right ass cheek a slight bit more, even though you most definitely wouldn't have said no to more of that either.
Oh it turned him on even more, hearing these dirty, inappropriate words slip from your beautiful, plump pink lips, so…kissable. He grunts at his thoughts drifting off, using your left horn to force you into following his lead, backing you up against his burning hot crotch…or more, against the twitching, eagerly waiting head of his precum-leaking cock.
"Feel what your words alone do to me!?" He asks, steadying himself with a hand as he rubbed his tip against your inviting folds, slipping through them with ease.
You two both had something in common when it was about sexual experience, you had both only been able to learn from Porn on the HoloNet. And Cal had seen…quite the arrangement of cunts since that phase began on Bracca, when he reached that age, only increasing when his teenager-imagination of what you looked like under your clothes didn't let him sleep right until he got it out of his system, having ruined more boxershorts and thin blankets than he could count anymore.
But none of these ideas that once got him off so well could compete with what you actually served him, his past fantasies clearly underdeveloped in creativity. The softer, larger "scales" went from your neck…all the way down… connecting to your tail's under-scales of similar texture.
And this rare, primal looking view turned him on so much more than any of these boring normal ones on the HoloNet. Because everyone could have those, technically, but this one…all his, unique, monstrous and yet so so much more inviting to his body push into – glistening with your equally inhuman slick – to give you his very best and all until he was spent to the last drop, depositing his cum deep within that near artifact-level cunt.
Cal did exactly that, pushing you heavy, misbehaving tail away for now to get more leverage as he urges you to crawl even more towards him, grinning at the irresistible sounds you came up with just from his hand around your horn. "I'll make sure to make you feel so very full by the end of this, to give you what you desire so…badly!!" On his last word, he enters you with one shift of his hips. But it didn't feel like he hit the end of you today, your cervix. Something slightly began to give way…
Cal though, in his rush to give both of you this one of a kind high, didn't immediately notice. Instead, he repositioned himself behind you while not stopping to vigorously pump inside of you, his right hand gripping your so beautifully wide hip for now...perfect for bearing your children, he noticed for a while now. From behind, Cal is able to admire all of your Kaluk traits, all of which turned him on insanely for some freakish reason. He wasn't inside just any woman, he wasn't dating just any woman. You're a Kaluk, a formerly feared sentient half-dragon species…
You're the last – sane of mind – of your kind, no one else would be able to feel what he could feel with you, the staggering difference to a normal woman your age.
And it wasn't just his desire, it was his job as your mate…his mission…to start changing that number for good, today, tomorrow...whenever your body would feel ready for him and his seed.
A low growl in his throat, he feels your ribbed walls tighten and just barely relax again at his open thoughts, a sign that you also liked what he thought when he saw your body weaving and heaving under his. So…so much that you...you came?
"The idea of you, Cal Kestis…my mate breeding me like…this. Today? It's like I can barely…think of anything else anymore, all i...all i want is to become round with...ahh! our child now!" You continue to confess, voice strained and whiny as your ginger lover didn't stop even a second while listening to you, riding in your first orgasm of the day. With a mischievous smirk, he used his right hand to now also grab your other horn mid-confession. Another small moan fell from you, mouth kept agape by now as there wasn't a moment you weren't engulfed in the arousal of his searing hot touch. "In that case, you better be ready for my seed today, I won't let you waste a karking precious drop!"
His seed. You wouldn't, you would take everything from him and honor it. To be the one chosen to continue your kinds' legacy with your beloved Cal.
You could feel the stretch of your walls as he swiftly and not a bit gently now pistoned into your cunt, the wet slaps of your bodies whenever he nearly fully bottoms out inside of you. But there was a bit missing, something you felt every time his cock's head pounded against the extremly sensitive muscle of your womb's opening. Tears began to river down your face when you started losing count of the times you felt your own orgasms ripple through you from the sensation, the idea behind it wreaking primal chaos in your heads, chanting his name like an ritualistic incantation as Cal didn't even think about slowing down when he also felt your shaking body under him. It was like a fresh orgasm after every last as your body lost all restrictions over itself...
You're so karking aroused and blissed out of your mind already, he thought, was there even one clear thought in your head left if he already lost himself so much? He had to focus too much on his own endurance to be able to just see what was going on in that head of yours.
So he just tested for them instead, "Hey my Love, what…what are you thinking about, hmm? Or do you need some mental encouragement, my little breeding slut?"
A small moan of protest at his crude – ...but seemingly very welcomed... – nickname later, the echo of his hand harshly, ruthlessly slapping your reddening partially scaly cheek once more, you edge yourself closer to him before looking over your shoulder to the best of your ability.
"I really need you to fuck a child into me, to breed me like we're supposed to! Please, fill my womb with your fertile seed- Mhh- AH!" And it really was everything left in your thoughts, he knew that without being able to read them right now, rewarding your ability to still somehow communicate verbally with a smothering, needy kiss – pouring all his affection into it at that moment – the softest act coming from him right now as your words spurred him on even more, near inhumanly. He would give you exactly what your fertile body craved, he's going to pump you full to your limit today! Using the grip on your horns, he pulls you up flush against his chest, relentless as he continues abusing your small hole...stretching like this for nobody but him. It was that knowledge that kept him going, to his best efforts. He cannot ever disappoint you, he is the best at the job of pleasing you!
You're ALL his!
"You're going to look…so perfect, carrying…our child!" He hums seductively into your ear, kissing the fresh tears of overstimulation and excitement away as he listens to your loving, deep moans and whines like they were the song that kept him going. That he would someday be in this position – on the straight path of creating a real family with someone at this very moment, in the living quarters on a base of the Empire – he would've never expected that, but you coming into his life had spun everything around already. Positively. The light in his live, even before you bonded.
He never had felt more alive than when he was around you, more hopeful, more at ease.
Neither of you had been plagued by your usual nightmares or night terrors anymore since you finally had been able to share one mattress, the warm, all engulfing, ensuring feeling of being able to keep each other safe, even from your own demons.
And now you even wanted to give him something you both never really had, you still more – due to that Mandalorian, the weird, green Child and the Clones – than him: a family. His own, real Family to watch as it grew, prospered and hopefully didn't have to deal with the things you both had to as kids. He wanted them to have a peaceful childhood...something taken from him and you.
"I love you, Kyra. I do! I really do!" He promised under currently uncharacteristic whimpering, hands slowly leaving your horns now as he slowly lost his need to control, simply wanting to feel the bliss of his cock sheathed in your cunt, but not slowing down his current speed as he felt his own high coming closer. "So do I… Cal. And I will…never stop…loving you!" Though choppy for obvious reasons, it fully reached his ears as he hugged you close, caught a bit off guard when he once more didn't feel the same resistance as the last two times. Every time he pushed deeper, it gave way more, albeit a bit tightly either way. So incredibly tight, that he couldn't make sense of his behavior, he probably would've stopped normally, but like a spell cast on him…he didn't stop there.
Like it sucked him in, calling...begging him to continue.
With a bit of force in his last push, he felt the tight muscle finally give way fully as he slipped in much further now. And the sensation he was receiving now that he was truly bottomed out totally, this pulsing and snug feeling, like a vibrating, wet and warm sleeve, it felt out of this galaxy. As he groans and hissed out deeply, it was him for once to sink his nails into the soft skinned parts of your hips, losing the endurance fight he had to deal with to not immediately cum in streams into your cunt.
You also felt the sudden, unfamiliar yet in no way uncomfortable intrusion, your body reacting to the feeling almost immediately with your hopefully last climax when you felt the exhaustion and soreness creep up as he pulsed deep deep inside of you. Unlike him, you knew what border he just crossed but you also were unaware of how it was even possible, the impossibility of that very intrusion and the heavenly high it gave you pushed that thought to the back of your cloudy head for now.
He pushed through your cervix…he was right…right in your womb, continuing to rut into you fully unaware of where his cock was right now, now more slowly though, the tightness restricting him from fully ruining your sensitive, precious insides. Not that you had to worry about that, he was careful. Your silent gasps and shouts of pleasure, his own airy groans at the unexplainable feeling of his cock so deeply inside of you cut off as he grabbed onto you, the slight pain – more of a tickle, really – of his nails in your hips and he himself produced some weird form of a dominant growl through his clenched teeth, kissing your neck afterwards instinctively as he finally stilled, panting.
And this time you knew you weren't imagining it, you felt his seed spew into your womb, nothing able to hold it from its goal anymore, coating the very walls that shouldn't be able to be touched by another person, not even yourself. Not a drop would be escaping it again either, his cock blocking the exit.
Your walls were gripping him fiercely, convulsing, relaxing and tightening with your own climax which was still in full force as Cal let you both lower back towards the more comfy couch, but not able to budge even an inch. He had some room, but not to pull out, only to go deeper and to turn your bodies for a better resting position.
This was it, he really bred you like he promised, even though this probably wasn't what he expected or especially what he had planned, not even you did and it was your karking body!
"You're…I…kark, I can't move, Kyra." And he tried, but it only created fresh friction for your sore flesh as your body held him tightly, keeping you plugged up. Something, was it once long lost instincts perhaps, told you though that you would be fine after a few minutes...or hours. Depends?
So, to relax him, or at least attempt to, you gently pull him in for a kiss, catching him a bit off guard as you smile into it exhausted but incredibly pleased with you both. "We'll be alright, I know it. Give…give it a moment." You whisper against his slightly agape lips, placing loving pecks onto them and the corners as he feels his thoughts clear up little by little. What kind of animal did he just become because of...you?
He just came so deep inside of you, it wasn't even dripping out of you yet. Would it even once he is back out of you?
"I trust you, you know your body, i hope. Kark, I love you, Kyra…" He mutters, body – having reassurance from you – relaxing a bit into the cushions as he let his hands stroke over your heated skin and scales – admiring them once more – you were both flushed from the new experience, but you were definitely hotter to the touch right now. And you got touchy. Not sexually but...lovingly.
The high ebbed away to a general feeling of pleasant bliss as you already nearly forget about what caused Cal's initial worry, the only thing keeping a bit of your thoughts on it was the small, internal twitches of him. Had you not been this exhausted from this one round, it would've been more than enough to rile you back up, to encourage him into giving you more of his cum. To make love to you once more, just like a few moments before.
"We gotta ask Dr. Puloria about this, I guess…" you instead hum against his chest, blowing against the few red hairs growing on him that weren't sticking to him because of his sweat to – as stupid as it sounded – pass the time until you could move freely again. Though you really weren't against just sleeping on the couch, until you're back on your feet again and you can continue your day.
Looking at the wall clock, you had to realize with a grimace that it wasn't even 12PM yet, knowing you had to go to Infirmary today anyways. You wished you had a reason to dodge today's scheduled meeting.
"You think she'll know that much about the Kaluk?"
Well, you haven't gotten to checking said Research Papers yet, so there is a slim chance that she does. But until now you could only theorize yourself, having a pretty solid one already targeted in your eyes, "Tell me then…don't just tease it." Cal jokes with a yawn interrupting himself before elevating his head with one of his arms. Thankfully he left the awkwardness of this situation out of the picture, that he could return to your casual after-sex talk just as easily like you. Otherwise you would hang yourself up at this subject till it was even worse than before. "I wouldn't, Kyra. I can wrap my head around it somewhat that it's probably because you're a Kaluk, not a human. Don't worry about me with that…"
What a lerfect ginger bastard this boy, well, more of a man now, was. Your slightly problematic firecrot-
"No nicknames, theory, now." He commands, pulling you away from your praise for him, though mildly inappropriate in the words you decided to choose.
"Well, it could be that…that Kaluk Women had…"wider" or...softer, more stretchy...Cervix? To ensure higher mating potential. The only thing I once read about regarding the anatomy mating of Kaluk though, aside from the 'Only one Mate' thing, which is actually more than mental stuff apparently, is that they had no trouble with reproducing "in high rates" and birthing their "young ones" – though no explanation for that reason was given – causing some questions under unaware Species Experts why the Kaluk suddenly disappeared like that…"
Though the last part was now unfortunately very clear to you – why they were wiped away from nearly everything, their own planet, books and history from long ago, protected Galaxy Heritage! – it didn't help with a lot for you back then. Especially when you one day entered puberty…which must've been a whole lot more difficult to deal with than a normal human teen, and you desired to know more about that... subject.
"That's really not a whole lot left…plus that we can’t know if these books were all still telling the truth as well."
One way or another, it would all come out at some point, you knew that, but it wasn't easy to wait for that day or that specific time. You would have to wait until it's potentially already important or pushing to become important because the Infirmary isn't exactly well equipped for your kind. So then, in case of a…a pregnancy, you would have to hope to the makers they somehow make the right decisions from sheer damn luck.
"We will see in near time, won't we, sweet dragonfly? I…I got a pretty good feeling about today." He jokes, gently kneading your soft stomach and its scales – where your child would potentially grow someday – on top of him, his thoughts somehow still returning to the moment it felt like destiny was settled, his young, fertile cum shot so deeply into your equally fertile womb it wouldn't see the light of day once more.
"We will…" you yawn softly, feeling weirdly whole with the dirty, inappropriate act of him lodged into your most sensitive place, hugging your shorter frame against his paler, freckled one, kissing his chest slowly when sleep begins to take over. "We definitely will, and I hope we will find out at each other's side." "Of course my beloved…everything we will fight together, conquer everything together. Survive…together." He hums, voice deep with sleep as well as he now could actually relax, now that you managed to talk about some of it all and sunk down into the pillows further, encouraging your need for closure by also hugging you closer. Not long after, wrapped into each others arms, you had fallen into a dreamless state of sleep, a blanket haphazardly pulled over you two in the last conscious moments by Cal's use of the force.
. . .
'Cal? Kyra? Are you still up?' The small Droid beeps quietly, slowly – having ducked his frame even smaller – stalking back into the living room when he had heard something odd from the same direction, it having woken him up mid-charge. He knew they wouldn't just get ambushed here anymore, the Base is supposedly the safest place as of now, from what Cal and Kyra told him while they ate at the Canteen. But he could help but worry. For Cal. For Kyra. For his best friends.
So he was quite relieved when nothing seemed out of order in the bigger, open room and he managed to see them on the couch from his spot on the floor, hopping onto the gray cushioning to get a better look at his friends. Their breathing was calm. Now. It was much higher just a few minutes ago, he took from a basic scan of their pulses…
Of course...dirty kids...
With a low, disapproving whistle at their unconscious bodies, he carefully walked around them to find a good spot beside them, the warmth radiating from their naked bodies comforting even a Droid in some moments as he lowered himself back down. He would simply continue charging next to them until either of them woke up again to continue the day, they still had to explain so much of what he had missed.
'I'm so glad I didn't lose you two…'
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