#the fact that he is NOT blindly optimistic in seeing only the best or what he wants to see | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

aspoonofsugar · 3 years

Text

Ironwood and Cinder: The Final Word

Cinder: And that’s… checkmate.

The Final Word of the volume is Cinder’s and it is meaningful she says it to Ironwood.

As a matter of fact Ironwood and Cinder are two sides of the same coin on many levels. This is conveyed also structurally.

Volume 7 is mostly about Ironwood’s tragic spiral. We are shown him struggle with his flaw throughout the whole volume, but in the end he loses to it and becomes just as dangerous as Salem:

Oscar: Then you're as dangerous as she is, James.

Not only does volume 8 close with Cinder instead, but it also opens with her:

And it even gives us her backstory:

Why does it happen? And why is Cinder’s final line so important when it comes to her foiling with Ironwood?

GRAVITY

It is not by chance that Watts calls both Ironwood and Cinder out before the climax of respectively volume 7 (Ironwood) and volume 8 (Cinder). This is because, as stated above, volume 7 is Ironwood’s volume, while volume 8 is Cinder’s. So they both are confronted with a truth about themselves and their reaction to it influences their stories in the Atlas arc.

In a sense, even if Watts is the one dangerously hanging over an abyss... it is actually Ironwood and Cinder who are on the brink. They are deciding Watts’s survival, but they are also deciding their own destiny.

They are choosing if to fall because of gravity or if to fly in the sky victorious.

At the same time, the two scenes with Watts show how Cinder and Ironwood are both similar and opposites.

AS ABOVE, SO BELOW

Ironwood and Cinder are nothing, but two products of Atlas’s society.

Ironwood was born at the very top:

Watts: You just stood atop it and called yourself a giant!

Cinder existed at the very bottom:

Watts: You think you're entitled to everything just because you've suffered, but suffering isn't enough! You can't just be strong, you have to be smart! You can't just be deserving, you have to be worthy! But all you have ever been, is a BLOODY MIGRAINE!

Watts is in the middle and he represents the worst traits of both.

He wants everything, just like Cinder:

Ironwood: I gave you everything you could have wanted!

But differently from Cinder it was no true he had nothing. He was successful, had food, clothes and respect. Still, he was never satisfied and ended up disgracing himself in the search of something more.

He also disregards feelings in favor of rationality, just like Ironwood:

Watts: Our tin soldier’s heart has cost him his mind.

And he sees people under him as inherently inferior:

Watts: Yes, yes, please keep your posse in check.

This is why his death is fitting:

Cinder: I merely added more flames to the fires of Atlas.

He burns with Atlas aka the city he wants to destroy, but also a symbol of who he is deep down.

What is more, his death happens specifically because he blindly follows his wishes:

Watts: Oh, believe me, this is everything I've ever wanted.

And because he is outsmarted and manipulated by Cinder:

Cinder: You deserve this, Arthur. We'll be back.

He is proud of his genius and rationality, but in the end he dies because of his feelings of pettiness.

In short, Watts, Cinder and Ironwood represent three social classes of Atlas and how the system corrupts people at every level. In general, all three want to be at the very top, but disreguard and mistreat the ones below.

-This is why Ironwood seeks control even in situations where he is not in charge, like the Vytal Festival. He also challenges Ozpin’s authority and leadership because he is not used not to be the one deciding. At the same time, he is shown ready to discard Mantle in multiple occasions.

-This is why Watts can call out Ironwood’s arrogance without seeing he is exactly the same as him.

-Finally, this is why Cinder lashes out at people she sees as Atlas elites (the Schnees, Ironwood, Watts), but treats those below her just like she was treated:

Emerald: We don't need him! Everything was going fine! (a slap is heard, and she cries out in pain)

Cinder: Do not mistake your place.

Mercury: Oh yeah? Tell that to--

Cinder: Quiet.

THE ENEMIES OF TRUST

Both Ironwood and Cinder’s left arms are artificial. Ironwood’s is mechanical, while Cinder’s is Grimm.

Their respective arms convey opposite approaches to things.

On a more general level, they are respectively linked to Creation (Ironwood’s mechanical arm) and to Destruction (Cinder’s Grimm arm). As a matter of fact a robotic arm is a human creation, while Grimms are nothing, but the symbol of destruction.

On a personal level, their arms hint at the two characters’ opposite personalities.

Ironwood’s arm can’t feel pain.

Cinder’s is instead linked to pain and feelings in different ways:

Raven: Aura can't protect your arm, it's Grimm.

Salem: You chose to disobey my specific instructions just to fail again.

Cinder: She’s back…

Cinder feels great pain whenever her Shadow Hand is cut because she can’t protect it with aura. At the same time, it is used by Salem to torture her. Finally, it links her to Salem to the point that she knows when her Master is back.

In other words, Cinder’s arm lets her feel more, while Ironwood’s lets him feel less.

This difference is mirrored by both the ways Ironwood and Cinder respectively attack Watts and by their semblances:

Ironwood’s Mettle lets Ironwood suppress his own feelings, so that he can pursue any objective, no matter how cruel or immoral it is. It makes him “superhuman”, but in a very negative sense.

Cinder’s Scorching Caress represents Cinder’s explosive emotions. It is a form of self-expression, which is both destructive and self-destructive.

Ironwood’s semblance is about repression, while Cinder’s is about lashing out.

Similarly, Ironwood goes after Watts at the cost of his arm and he ignores the pain he feels:

Watts: I wouldn't do that if I were you. I mean, unless you're hoping to add more metal to that body of yours.

Cinder instead goes after Watts to vent her anger:

Cinder: What do you mean, she'll destroy herself? How am I supposed to take her power if she's dead?!

Both are extremes and both are wrong, as Winter explains:

Winter: But yes Penny, we must still acknowledge our personal feelings, wrestle with them. It ensures us that we’re on the right path. It’s what makes us human.

Ironwood and Cinder should aknowledge their own feelings not to be consumed by them. It is also the only way for them to truly be humans, not machines or monsters, but simply people.

Both characters almost succeed just before the climax of their respective volumes.

Ironwood tries to open up to others:

And Cinder shows vulnerability:

However, none of them is able to capitalize on this chance for development. This is ironically because of each other:

Cinder messes with Ironwood’s insecurities, while Ironwood’s ultimatum gives Cinder the perfect chance to ignore hers.

The result is that Ironwood goes back to control, while Cinder goes back to manipulation. Both do so because they are unable to trust.

Interestingly, they take after their respective mentors in this.

Ironwood takes after Ozpin:

Ironwood: Did you really think you were the only one who got to work on a new plan after Beacon? WIth Ozpin gone, I needed my own team of people I could trust.

Oscar: General? Earlier, you asked for my advice.

Ironwood: I wanted Ozpin's advice.

Oscar: And his advice probably would've been to keep your secrets.

Cinder takes after Salem:

Salem: When I chose you as my vessel for the Maidens, I put my trust in you. So, I trust that you wouldn’t possibly return to me empty-handed.

Ironwood’s whole struggle in volume 7 is his search for a “new approach”. He wants to be like Ozpin, but better. This is why he founds his own group, but wants to trust the world with the truth about Salem. However, he confuses trust with control.

Cinder instead wants to become just like Salem and suffers when she sees she is not. This is why she collects assets, just like her master. This is also why she does not trust anyone, but manipulates others.

That said, what is the difference between Ironwood’s control and Cinder’s manipulation? It has once again to do with feelings.

Ironwood’s attempt to manipulate others is about suppressing feelings. He uses Atlas’s military hierarchy and social structures to ask for his subordinates’ blind loyalty.

Cinder’s method to control people lies instead in making use of others’ feelings. She uses both wishes and fears to her advantage.

In short, control and manipulation are nothing, but the same inability to trust declined in opposite ways. They are both “enemies of trust”.

This is why both Ironwood and Cinder find a strong enemy and a foil in the character, who embodies friendship in these volumes:

Deep down, Ironwood and Cinder not trusting others is because they fear betrayal:

Cinder: I won’t have to run now.

Rhodes: That’s all you’ll ever do.

Ironwood: I've chased a lot of shadows over the years, always expecting betrayal. But never once did I think it would ever come from you.

However, Penny too is betrayed and mistreated by others:

Penny: I do not like it when friends fight.

Ruby: I know. Yang and I may not agree on how best to save Mantle but-

Penny: No. I mean Winter. The general. They were our friends. But then the Ace Ops attacked you. And the general, he said people were going to die, because of me.

However, she does not give up on the ideal of a genuine bond:

Attached but not By strings

Still, if Penny is a positive foil to both Ironwood and Cinder, why does she die?

RISK

Weiss: Trust is a risk.

Yang: Ruby, they’re not called sure things, they’re called risks.

These two lines taken together are why at the end of volume 8 Penny dies, our heroes fall and the manipulative Cinder wins.

It happens to show the main theme of the two Atlas volumes. Trust is not a “sure thing”. It is a risk and it does not always work. Still, it is necessary to trust as it is necessary to take risks:

Yang: You were being optimistic. Look, blind optimism isn’t great, but no optimism means we already lost. We need hope. We need to take risks.

Giving up on trust and risks means giving up on hope. It means to give in to fear.

Still, this does not mean your trust will always be paid back. And it does not mean that the risks you take will always work, even if you come up with a wonderful plan:

Cinder: I knew your plan would be bold, but I never could have predicted all of this...

Sometimes people will betray you:

Sometimes your risk will end up in a fall:

However, it is still worth to trust, even when you have no guarantee it will work:

And sometimes It is even worth to risk the fall because it may lead to people being saved:

This same idea is conveyed also through Penny’s final choice:

Penny: Trust me.

Winter: Thank you for trusting me with this.

Penny dies tragically, but she still manages to pass the Maiden’s power to a person she trusts.

This is especially meaningful because the Winter Maiden power, just like Penny herself, has been subjected to both control and manipulation.

Ironwood does all he can to make sure the power ends up to Winter. At the same time, he is the one most responsible for Penny feeling as nothing, but a robot:

Ironwood: As the official report stated, that footage was doctored. Penny is completely under my control.

Cinder tries to steal the power three times. She also manipulates Penny’s feelings towards her friends:

Cinder: I was hoping your friends would be here. But it looks like they left you to do all the work. You’re just a tool to be used!

In the end, Ironwood treating Penny as a machine (control) and Cinder using Penny’s love for her friends against her (manipulation) are among the psychological factors that lead Penny to be mortally wounded by Cinder.

Still, while dying Penny negates both Ironwood and Cinder and frees the power and herself from both control and manipulation.

The fact she chooses Winter works well to illustrate this.

Winter is the person Ironwood wants as the next Maiden. However, Winter becomes a Maiden not because of Ironwood’s control, but because of Penny’s trust:

Ironwood: So… the destiny I chose for you has arrived.

Winter: You chose nothing. This...was a gift.

Winter is a Schnee, so she represents both what Cinder hates and what she herself wants to be:

Cinder to Winter: You Atlas elites are all the same! You think hoarding power means you’ll have it forever, but it just makes the rest of us hungrier.

Winter is a symbol of Atlas and so she is a reminder to Cinder that Atlas is not really destroyed:

Robyn: What do you think a kingdom is? The people, or just the chunk of land they live on?

Just like Cinder’s past isn’t.

WORTHY

Cinder wants to be worthy. Ironwood wants to be a hero.

Deep down, Ironwood and Cinder want the same thing. They want to be above others. They want to be more than humans.

However, they go at it in opposite ways:

Ironwood: I have sacrificed everything!

Cinder: I want it all...

Ironwood thinks that victory lies in sacrificing everything, while Cinder sees it as taking it all.

These opposite viewpoints mirror their respective social stances.

Ironwood can say he wants to sacrifice everything because he has everything.

Cinder thinks happiness lies in everything because she has nothing:

Cinder: You’re right. Without you I am nothing. But because of you, I am everything.

In the end, Ironwood and Cinder are each other’s true enemies, but they fail to see it and lash out against the wrong people:

Ironwood and Cinder’s respective fight against Winter and Weiss is exactly this.

Ironwood fights a Maiden he sees as an enemy of Atlas, while another Maiden is attacking the people he swore to protect.

Cinder lashes out at Weiss because of her origins, while Weiss has decided to leave her status and money behind to make the right thing.

Still, Ironwood and Cinder are too hypocritical to see the truth. This is why they attack people, who could have helped them, if they were given the chance.

This is also why they receive a warning:

Winter: No, you have sacrificed everyone else!

Winter: You… are going to pay… for everything you’ve done!

Ironwood claims he is ready to sacrifice everything. However, he never sacrifices himself:

In the end, he is unable to sacrifice his life to fight Salem.

Let’s highlight he has nothing to lose by this point. He is falling with Atlas anyway. In his final moments, he is given the chance to prove true to his words:

I would die Without regret, I’d offer up my life With zero reservations I would fly Into the sun If that would keep our dream alive

Instead, he gives up. He has been shooting his allies until the very end, but freezes in front of his enemy.

Cinder thinks she is closer to her final victory, but in the end she has accomplished nothing of what she truly wants.

She wants to kill RWBY, but they are alive. She wants the Maiden powers, but she fails.

At the same time, Cinder is still far away from what she truly needs:

Cinder: You have everything you need?

Watts: Oh, believe me, this is everything I've ever wanted.

She is given a perfect mirror of herself in Watts. Still, instead of seeing it, Cinder uses his flaw, which is her same flaw, to kill him. Watts’ wants lead to his death and the same thing might happen to Cinder if she does not stop herself in time.

Finally, there is this:

Salem: This game is not yours to win, Cinder, it’s mine. Just because you’re more valuable to me than a pawn, does not make you a player. Everything is already in motion. All you need concern yourself with is your ability to act when I tell you to.

Ironwood and Cinder share a chess motif.

Ironwood thinks of himself as a player and specifically as Salem’s opponent.

Cinder is instead told she is no player.

However, in the end, Ironwood becomes a mere pawn to the point that all Watts has to do is to open his cell to be sure he is going to unwillingly aid in Cinder’s plan.

What is more, he is so fixated on Salem that he fails to aknowledge the people below him. This is why his true opponent is a slave that Atlas exploited.

Cinder frames herself as a player instead. She is the one who truly makes the first move against Ironwood and ultimately she is the one who defeats both him and our protagonists. Finally, she is the one who calls checkmate.

Still, is she really playing her own game?

In the end, the one who gets what she wants is not Cinder, but Salem:

And all she has to do to obtain it is one small move:

Salem: And I’ve realized, it’s all my fault. You’ve fought your whole life unwaveringly for what you want and here I am holding you back instead of lifting you up.

While Cinder is once again letting her talent be exploited by those above her. She is choosing to be Salem’s Queen instead than a player of her own life.

She is the Black Queen defeating the White King, but nothing more.

#rwby #rwby meta #rwby vol8 #rwby vol7 #cinder fall #james ironwood #my meta

253 notes · View notes

bbq-hawks-wings · 3 years

Text

Chapter 316: BBQ is capable of critiquing BNHA and… Oh boy.

Let's start this off properly, Horikoshi's typical quality of writing has been diminishing in recent chapters, but this week it was so different that it didn't even feel like Horikoshi was the one who wrote it.

To be clear, I'm not blaming Horikoshi for the issues I'm about to bring up. The man is criminally overworked, usually doesn't even get the final say in what makes it in the final drafts, and even in his other rough patches he's still produced decent chapters that hold up amongst the grand scheme of things. This feels like something else is going on behind the scenes, and while I have my suspicions on who/what might be the culprit behind it, I choose not to share it at this time because if I name names some people might go off on a crusade, and that's not what I want.

I just want to be clear that I'm not blindly firing off shots in the dark, but despite my frustrations I want to wait to see if this gets resolved down the line, and while I do I can complain about the specific reasons this chapter left such a bitter taste in my mouth.

Buckle up, buttercups, because we got a lot of points to cover.

Where's the Gun?

Not a literal gun, but I mean Chekhov's Gun. It has always been a staple of Horikoshi's writing and the reason so many of his long-standing plot lines have paid off so well.

Chekhov's Gun is a writing principal that if you see a gun on the table in the first act of a play, it will be used in the murder that happens in act 2. Basically, the author should include details that are relevant to the story and not betray the audience by leading them in one direction and at the last minute pull the rug out from underneath them to go in another direction.

Horikoshi has done this to phenomenal success in the past. Just as one example, he dropped hints about Nomu being human experiments early in the series but held off explicitly stating it for a while. He hinted at the loss of Shirakumo in the main narrative and that he was important to Aizawa and Mic as well as approved it for Vigilantes so when it was revealed that Kurogiri was Shirakumo's body, not only did it narratively make sense but it also pulled in Eraserhead and Present Mic's emotional stakes into the battle with the Doctor, and then when Ujiko reveals he was after Aizawa's quirk the whole time it made the payoff for Mic punching him in the face all that much better and brings the weight of his crimes and the impact they have on the victims full circle.

That's 3 different guns paying off in the long run: the Nomu, Shirakumo, and both Mic and Eraserheads' personal arcs past the loss of their childhood friend and that they could finally finish processing their grief and avenge him in full righteous fury instead of chalking it all up to cruel chance.

He has left details, some particularly innocuously, in plot lines like the Touya Todoroki reveal, Hawks' backstory, Shigaraki's blood connection to Nana Shimura, even with Mr. Compress's backstory, and more. When re-read, these details become more obvious and usually leaves us with a greater sense of satisfaction in the plot knowing that twists and turns were not only planned, but built up to and hinted at for us to find so the payoff is that much better and it feels purposeful instead of just shock factor.

None of that happened this chapter.

Lady Nagant has zero business being in this plotline. She was never hinted about before this arc, and her existence does nothing to tell us about the plot moving forward or the world that they're trying to change. Nothing her existence provides actually has any bearing on the universe or tells us anything we don't already know. But that's not how she was presented.

In the beginning we're given a glimpse of her helping Overhaul escape from Tartarus. The focus on her was odd enough to begin with as a new character, and the fact that she didn't look like she fit the profile of someone who belonged in Tartarus was like a flashing neon sign saying, "Pay attention! This new character is important!!!" She then shows up later with Overhaul in hand to attack Deku out of the blue. We get her talking about how she thought Overhaul might be useful and her disillusions with Hero Society. We catch her mannerisms with eery similarity to Hawks only to find out immediately after she was a senior colleague in the HPSC. Never once to my knowledge has Hawks referred to any of his senior colleagues as a "senpai" - not even his fellow heroes - and when he catches her in midair, he uses the words, "Don't die on me, senpai!" as if she's near and dear to his heart.

The entire character arc is set up for her to have known about Hawks and grapple with her desire to help people and her fear of re-creating what she hated, and this also set up Hawks to be the successor who succeeded where she failed and helped bring her to a place where she could be a hero without guilt again. What actually happened?

They're strangers.

They have never actually met before, and while he seems to know a lot about her, she doesn't even seem to have any idea of who he was - at least as far as being another hero under the thumb of the HPSC. So ALLLL that setup, all that gesturing, and all of the potential themes that would be right at home in an arc like this goes completely out the window.

Her story doesn't tell us anything new. The HPSC bad. We knew that. They're not above throwing innocents under the bus to achieve that goal. We knew that. They preyed upon young hopefuls with powerful quirks with the intent to maintain the status quo. We knew that even if the fact that Hawks isn't the only one now makes more questions than answers. We know that these young heroes can never say no under threat of steep, life-shattering consequences. We knew that already.

So what does Lady Nagant even bring to the table?! The entire "you're just a puppet doing what you've been told" angle is a little tired and out of place in this point and time with actual anarchy in the streets (not to mention hypocritical considering she was a blind puppet following orders and offers zero actual solutions that supposedly fall in line with her heroic nature), and it could have been left to any number of other villain characters who could have executed on the theme better - you know, like Shigaraki who's justification this entire time has been, "hero society doesn't make people safe, it just makes them feel safe" from the moment of his inception.

So from that angle she's unnecessary.

Her presence messes with the continuity of the series as well. If Hawks is supposed to explicitly replace her, that would mean that he wasn't just a fluke find on the commission's part and grabbed to mold into their own special superweapon; and that also would mean that her killing of the former president was before he was discovered which should put her at least in her forties. If this isn't the case, and he was meant to simply replace her in a "special agent" case, that still begs the question of how many more gifted children the commission preyed upon and are still out there.

And maybe the worst kicker for me is that something stinks. The way the art in this chapter is presented, if you completely blanked out the speech bubbles, is the same setup I had before - Hawks reaches out to his former mentor and pulls her from the brink of despair with a moving message about why he never gave up hope in being a hero who could actually make a difference.

Again, this is not what we got. He claims he knows her, and it's implied to have been a deep, personal character witness; but at best he only knows about her from secondhand sources. Even his reasoning as to how he never lost hope doesn't vibe with his character.

We have gotten so many cool one-liners for Hawks, but there has always been a consistent tone and imagery with them.

"Those who can fly, should."

"I don't belong in a cage."

"I'm free of my shackles."

"Can I be a shining light, just like him?"

What we got was, "I'm an optimist to a fault" which was the wording the official release went with and was by far the best iteration I have seen, but even this falls short of being truly in character for him and answering her question properly.

@mikeana made an edit of the titular panels for us Hawks stans this week with dialogue we and a few other friends felt was more fitting not only with the imagery of the chapter itself but internally consistent with the specific expressions Hawks uses in his heartfelt, personal dialogue. I just tweaked it a little bit more to fit what I was going for in our original conversation.

Which brings me to another concern.

2. What's the point?

There was no use for Nagant in the series as she's been presented so far. But more than that, Hawks has no business in this fight to begin with. He literally did nothing to earn this emotional moment, and this should have been Deku's moment.

We were teased in an interview with Horikoshi that Hawks was going to get a special moment as an important end-game character as a "shining light" of hope for others to follow as well as promises for Ochako to have another moment in the spotlight to make a difference.

If this was Hawks' shining light moment, it wasn't necessary, and it does nothing to move the plot forward or develop characters in any true or believable way. It just happened because plot. This should have been Deku's victory through and through, and even he is the reason BOTH Hawks and Nagant made it out alive instead of painting the street below them.

Deku's victory was stolen from him, too. It sours the other promises made to us about other characters moving forward, as well, if this really was Hawks' "Shining Light" moment.

By the way, did you forget about Overhaul? Me too!!! What was the point of getting our hopes up about reintroducing this beloved character with the implications this was a major arc setup to have him scream about pops and then get detained with no clues about what's going to happen to him besides, "Say you're sorry to Eri, and you get to see pops"?!

All this posturing and clumsy narrative flailing only actually succeeded in getting Deku in front of AFO again for plot when we already know Mr. Potato Head could summon, show himself to, or find Deku at any time he wanted. But instead we get this time skip with a bunch of heroes completely mended walking into a big, spooky mansion for AFO to evil monologue at Deku for… *counts*

FOUR PAGES!!!

Only to then give him the "I want YOU!" point over a pre-recorded message and the final nail in the coffin to me that something is off.

3. Ex-pu-LOOOO-SHUN!

It's become almost a game among friends to count how many explosions have happened since the end of the war arc - and specifically fake-out explosions. In the end of 311 we get All Might's car attacked via explosion and Deku cornered by Nagant only for All Might to be fine in the next chapter. In 315 Lady Nagant herself explodes in a blaze of glory to once again not be dead.

Gee! I wOnDeR if aLl the heroes were AcTuAlLy cornered and KiLlEd in that explosion in the mansion!

None of us do. They're fine. We're going to see it first thing next week. The shock has worn off, and it's repetitive and annoying at this point. There is no cliffhanger despite how the framing might try to tell you otherwise.

It's BAD WRITING.

The writing has been moving far too quickly and clumsily with no explanation in sight, and even character interactions are being cut short to the point of them being meaningless and empty.

This doesn't even feel like Horikoshi's bad writing. It feels like someone else is trying to call the shots and rushing him through these final bits of the series, and he's run out of things he's previously set up for months and months to reappear so someone is trying to get Dabi-reveal levels of attention with arcs and storylines that don't have the build-up to result in a satisfactory payoff.

4. At least it can get better... I hope.

Maybe those who share my suspicions or know what particular suspicions I have are with me in believing that this is a temporary disappointment and we haven't seen the last of the writing that's captivated me for years. I don't blame Horikoshi for these glaring faults that all came to a head in this chapter.

It CAN get better later, and I think it WILL- we just probably are going to have to wait for it. Until then, I'm going to enjoy the Hawks panels we got, maybe edit the last few chapters to be more in line with something more like the BNHA I know in a "fix it fic" fashion so I don't groan in anticipation of how long it might take us to get there.

See you all next week, hopefully on a much brighter note.

#she speaks #chapter review #bnha 316 #bnha chapter 316 #bnha manga spoilers

133 notes · View notes

angelicmichael · 3 years

Text

renegade

Andy Dolan x reader

Summary: After another night where Hedwig abandons Andy; reader is left with no other choice but to try and help console him the best she can.

Words: 3.6k+

Warnings: vague mentions of drugs and being intoxicated, some jealous! reader, lotsss of angst, brief fluff, mainly hurt/comfort fic tbh hehe, major Hedwig slander oops, maybe a bit of unhealthy relationships (??), slowburn, some conflict/arguing

A\N: hey y’all, hope u enjoy this hehe. I was mostly going for a angst and fluff vibe when I wrote this but it just turned into hurt/comfort so.. hopefully it’s still enjoyable !! :) this takes place sometime in episode three probably lol. ALSO fic is named after the song Taylor swift has recently been featured in 👉🏻👈🏻

The town, Eden; regardless of its beauty was a force to be reckoned with.

Being practically forced to live in a town that was so.. particular was never something you envisioned for your future in the past, but now you wouldn’t want to be anywhere else; even given the choice.

After all how could you exactly complain?

If you were to ask any person- (or any sane person that didn’t know of Eden that well) they would say that living here would sound like complete fucking heaven. A small coastal town, a tight knit community that was overly abundant with beautiful people and drugs seemed beyond euphoric.. and it was. Atleast for the first week or two.

Looking back; you were purely fucking naïve, and far too much of a optimist to assume shit wouldn’t crash or burn eventually.

Your first red flag was Hedwig.

She was one of the first people you met, and you two quickly hit it off and became close but.. things never exactly felt right with her, per say. Maybe it was because of how guarded she was, or because of the drugs she dealt.. it was hard to tell. However; Hedwig was completely fucking harmless compared to the man she introduced you too.

Andy Dolan.

Just like everyone in Eden; he was drop dead gorgeous but.. oddly hostile. At first you only saw him at parties, ones that you tried your best to avoid him at since you knew he had a notorious temper but, Hedwig being the great friend she is introduced you to him.. and that’s all it took.

You two quickly hit it off after that night (mostly because you were tired of Hedwig being your only friend and branching out never hurt anyone.. right?). Your attraction towards each other at first was strictly platonic, that was clear in how he treated you and how careful you were around him. It was almost stupid to try and not think about how pretty he was but letting your gaze linger on him for even more than two seconds felt erroneous.

You saw almost daily (or atleast every other day) how quick he was to anger and how cold he was to nearly everyone he met.. The only exception at this point was you and Hedwig but your sure if you were to even show a sign that you had romantic interest in him, he would drop you without a second thought. That thought alone was beyond fucking torturous but it wasn’t enough to stop you from daydreaming about how soft his hair or lips probably were. Ones that you doubt you would ever get the pleasure of touching but- atleast it was a nice distraction from how fucking weird Eden truly was.

Sure, it was beyond beautiful and the weather was fairly nice most days but that didn’t make up for peoples attitudes; and you weren’t referring to Andy’s. It wasn’t hard to tell that people were strangely secretive and cliquey, which only really left you with Hedwig and Andy for your friends. No matter how pretty she was, Hedwig was really only surface level friendly so you never particularly trusted her. That only left Andy (which wasn’t exactly any better when it came to being friendly but you knew he cherished your company, which was way more you could say about Hedwig).

However; it didn’t take too long for you and Andy to form a routine. Every weekend he would throw a party and you would stay with him after. The first time it happened, it was purely because you were far too fucked up to go anywhere else (which perhaps is also why Andy finally started being nice to you..) but after that, it was a question you never had the heart to say no too.

How could you? It’s not like he exactly had anyone else which made the possibility of saying no, close to impossible. Just because everyone else who lived in Eden were assholes didn’t mean you were going to be one, which is what lead you to your current predicament.

Five calls you had made that had all been unanswered is what currently lit up your phone screen, as well as your room. It was far past midnight and instead of sleeping like any other sane person would be doing - you were calling Andy or trying too anyway but he wasn’t fucking answering.. naturally.

You weren’t calling for any particular reason, but that wasn’t the point anymore. The fact that Andy wasn’t answering was a huge warning that something was wrong, after all it was a weekday and you knew he wasn’t sleeping or exactly busy.

Unless.. He was with Hedwig?

The thought automatically made your blood run hot under your skin. The feeling seething and utterly consuming until you quickly found yourself going out to your car. Doing the only thing that you knew would make your sudden paranoia go away.

As you drove through the roads that were completely vacant of any other cars and drove past houses and neighborhoods that also looked vacant of any life - you couldn’t help but to think why you even cared.

Andy never really showed interest in you, so what if Hedwig and Andy were actually doing anything?? Unless you caught them in the act, it’s not like either of them would admit to doing shit anyway but that didn’t stop you from still feeling irrationally angry and a bit betrayed.

You didn’t realize how tight you were gripping the steering wheel until you stopped the car and had to let go of it. Your fingers unnecessarily clenched and stiff to the point where they physically ached. Not to mention, you were shaking with the possibility that you could really find them here together, but now that you were actually here- you quickly realized that there was no other car here.

Odd.

You quickly (and quietly) stepped out of the car and paced up to Andy’s house. Not bothering to knock as you let yourself in, knowing that Andy wouldn’t necessarily mind that you did so.. well, you knew if he wasn’t with Hedwig anyway.

The only thing you heard were your footsteps as you took a few steps into the house. Looking cautiously for any signs of life.. any sounds or anything that could indicate anyone was in the house at all but you found nothing.

It took your eyes a minute to adjust to the near pitch darkness that omitted from the large windows that sat on the vast majority of the living room walls. The only light came dimly from the kitchen but even that was too sparse to truly allow you to see anything.

You slid your shoes off and left them by the door, not wanting your steps to allude to your presence before you could see him first and say something. Your steps far more quiet and easier to control now that you only had socks covering your feet.

You made it about halfway up the stairs, originally trying to make a beeline to Andy’s room but quickly freezing once you heard something.

It was shallow and soft but, with the contrast of pure stark silence it was nearly fucking deafening. It was a whimper at first, and it was coming from downstairs on the couch.

Your heart sank once you realized what exactly you were listening too. The first sniffle you heard nearly making you jump from how off guard you suddenly felt; that was the last thing you were expecting to hear..

You looked down from the staircase at the couch; making out a very dim outline of someone slumped over and sitting on the edge with their head in their hands. Their chest and back heaving from how deep they were crying..

You stood idle for a moment, not knowing whether to continue standing or to leave silently but you felt as if you didn’t exactly have a option. Even without asking or being able to necessarily see; you knew who it was but even knowing this- you knew getting him to talk was a good first step.

“Andy?”

Your voice automatically cut off his sobs - almost stopping instantaneously.

You saw his hands move down from his face and drop down to his lap, his head turning up to look at you. Your eyes finally adjusting to the near pitch black atmosphere.

The silence only permeated the room for about three seconds but that was nearly far too long to withstand. Knowing how unpredictable Andy was, you didn’t know if the words that were going to come out of his mouth were going to be kind or purely vile.

You started to speak fast without a second thought, the silence driving you to immediately apologize and try to fix the damage before Andy completely went off on you.

“I’m really sorry. I just got worried because you weren’t answering my calls and I wanted to make sure you were okay, but.. obviously your not,” You said. Swallowing harshly after realizing that Andy was still diligently listening and not cutting you off or telling you to leave.. That had to be a good sign, right? “What happened?” You pressed on.

“What do you think happened?” Andy answered quickly. His voice rough and rugged from sobbing, as well as probably from previously yelling.

You slowly walked down the stairs, choosing to not shy away from his sudden outburst of anger. You weren’t exactly certain which direction you would go in once you were finished descending.. but atleast you knew Andy wasn’t fucking Hedwig. Not right now at the very least.

“Was it Hedwig?” you blindly guessed. Wanting to affirm what you were so desperately hoping wasn’t true and that you could finally relax a bit. That’s if Andy wasn’t mad that you practically broke into his house.. but he didn’t seem to be. Not right now anyway.

You heard him softly laugh in response which made you smile for a second. You could tell by how he was previously crying and in the tone of his voice that he was still hurt. His laugh wasn’t genuine in the slightest; but it showed that he was done crying for the moment which was worth a smile.

“Why does it matter to you if it was her?”

“So it was,” you affirmed.

Your feet stepped off of the final step, and you found yourself approaching Andy. The choice came naturally. The closer you got to him the more apparent it was how broken he truly looked. He stopped crying but his eyes and cheeks were still glossy and wet with tears. His lips red and trembling; among looking entirely and utterly broken there was a hint of agitation present as well. You started to wonder if Hedwig truly did something or if Andy once again was blowing things out of proportion.

“Will you tell me what happened?” You asked cautiously. Your voice was soft, not wanting to unintentionally come off as too strong or hostile.

He studied you hesitantly and with a gleam of uncertainty in his eye - but nonetheless he patted the seat next to him on the couch he was sitting on. Silently urging you to sit next to him and letting you know that he would probably tell you what happened.

At first he remained quiet. Awkwardly avoiding what he knew you wanted to talk about but he still remained silent.. but his voice suddenly broke through. Making you jump at the unexpected sound that suddenly sounded so loud, even though in reality his voice was still low in tone.

“She left me.”

You stared at him numbly for a second, not feeling necessarily surprised at his words (After all, since when was Hedwig not a flight risk?) but instead feeling weirdly a bit frustrated and sad for Andy.

You knew exactly how he felt; it wasn’t like this was the first time this ever happened but hopefully it would be the last. Seeing Andy this sad and broken over someone who in reality, didn’t give two fucks about him was beyond heartbreaking. It hurt even worse for you to keep witnessing him coming back to her though.

Just when you finally opened your mouth to speak he cut you off.

“You don’t have to say anything. I know it’s my fault and I’m such a fucking idiot-“

“Andy, stop!” You said a bit too loudly. You tried your best to hold eye contact with him when he finally turned to meet your gaze as he reluctantly looked at you. You fought the impulse to apologize for raising your voice but there was no need because you didn’t truly feel sorry. He needed to hear you out. “You need to stop blaming yourself. Hedwig’s actions aren’t your fault.. she’s like that with everyone, Andy. She’s always been-“

“I don’t give a fuck what she’s like with other people y/n! She should’ve acted differently with me, she was supposed to care about me and stay..” his words cut off with a deep inhale.

He was trying not to sob and failing miserably.

Andy quickly left the couch, taking a few steps away from you with his back turned. Trying to compose himself as you sat and.. felt entirely guilty.

Even though he had practically blown up at you; you weren’t leaving but you knew approaching him wasn’t the answer either, so you stayed seated at the couch. Hoping he would atleast sit back down next to you.

“I can’t control Hedwig or what she does, Andy but I know solely saying that I’m sorry isn’t enough either,” you started and then paused. The words you wanted to say next.. words that you knew were true but barely had the courage to say were heavy on your tongue. You knew this wasn’t exactly the time to even be thinking about how you truly felt for Andy but you couldn’t help it.

You wanted nothing more than for it to stop. His tears, his words and pleading with Hedwig, your feelings.. it wasn’t enough to just submit to it anymore and to be a witness to how you truly felt. If anything, it was slowly but surely driving you mad and you knew unless you atleast hinted at the fact that it was making you upset; Andy wouldn’t change his behavior.

You knew he payed for sex from Hedwig, it was the one thing that always kept her coming back no matter how he acted and well.. Even if his time was being bought, he liked the attention. He craved it.

It felt weird to admit to yourself that he was taking you for granted.. because he wasn’t really but, compared to how he treated Hedwig - you were definitely on the back burner. You didn’t blame him; why would he ever notice you when he could have someone like Hedwig?

You slowly looked back at Andy, noticing he was staring at you once again with glossy blue eyes which appeared dark in the lighting. A dark, almost midnight blue that would surely match the ocean waves that you could faintly hear from inside the house since the back door was open. He looked a bit annoyed but mostly intrigued. He was waiting for you to continue.

“But you deserve better, Andrew. You shouldn’t allow her to repeatedly do this to you because I know she knows how upset it makes you. She doesn’t care-“

“How do you know how Hedwig feels about me y/n?! You need to keep her name out of your fucking mouth. You don’t know her like I do,” Andy spoke roughly.

You stared at him blankly for a moment. Purely appalled that he was saying this to you in total seriousness; but you knew in reality that it was foolish to be surprised.. to not expect that he would talk to you like this eventually. After all; he blew up at everyone else, why wouldn’t he do the same to you?

You knew nothing made you inherently different and well.. this was just proving that assumption. Andy never viewed you differently from anyone else; that was now crystal clear.

Your hands started to gently tremble in your lap; and it didn’t take long for the rest of your body to follow suit. The sadness and self pity quickly washed away in what was quicker and more rapid than waves. Anger surged through your veins, forcing you to stand up suddenly. You could barely stand to make eye contact as you spoke, barely able to bear to witness how your words made him feel.

“Don’t talk to me like that. You don’t get to talk to me like that. If I didn’t randomly decide to come and check on you because I guess I’m the only one who actually gives a fuck about you, then you would’ve been alone again with no one to yell at. And maybe that would’ve been for the best,” You turned around on your heels. Walking fast and headed for the door, trying to quickly slip your shoes on before you heard Andy’s voice solemnly.

“Y/n wait.”

You stood still at first, weirdly feeling numb and waiting for the metaphorical shoe to drop. Andy’s voice was soft this time as he spoke, the roughness that was present earlier was long gone but.. you didn’t trust it.

You waited for him to catch his breath and to raise his voice and just say more words he would apologize for later; your throat tightened as you felt your body react almost instinctively. You slipped the other shoe you previously put on back off. Turning around just enough so that you could make eye contact, or attempt too with the horribly dim lighting.

“Yeah? Wait for what?”

Andy swallowed in response to your words. Almost bashfully looking down briefly to avoid saying anything or having to look at you any longer. You could see tears staining his cheeks, continuing to run down and nearly slid down his neck. He looked pathetic; and it would’ve almost been funny to see a grown man fully sob in front of you with no shame if it wasn’t your best friend and well.. the person you loved.

“Never mind. You were right; it’s probably best if you just go,” Andy’s voice cracked.

You wanted to believe that the best option for you was to turn around and leave but your judgment felt entirely skewed. Was it really the right thing to turn around and leave when he needed you? Probably not.

You knew if the roles were changed and you were the one who was upset that Andy would probably stay.. but that also depended on other circumstances as well, of course.

Stepping away from your shoes and the entrance of Andy’s house; you approached him. You tried to do so as quickly as possible before he could try to stop you or protest, but by the time he looked up you were barely a foot away.

You reached up, and with a shaky hand (that you hoped desperately he didn’t notice or wouldn’t swat away) you gently placed your fingertips on his cheek. Your thumb softly pressing against his skin, dragging your finger up as to wipe away his tears as the rest of your fingers lie under his jaw.

You tried to ignore how unsettled he looked at you doing this, and how he almost looked uncomfortable or as if he was on the brink of telling you off.. but he didn’t. He watched you diligently as you continued to brush away his tears.

“I’m sorry.. But I couldn’t stand to see you like that,” you said. Trying to give some rational explanation for your behavior even though, Andy didn’t look like he particularly cared why you were doing it. It was the fact you were doing it at all that seemed to have his interest piqued.

You tried to pull your hand back since his cheeks were dry, but he stopped you. His hand softly grabbed your wrist before his hand slid into yours.. your fingers slowly lacing together before you turned your gaze from your laced hands up to his eyes.

“Will you stay?” He asked. His voice was still rough and gravelly but this time, it was starting to sound a bit genuine.

You studied him for a second longer - your mouth dry but you knew the answer before you even spoke.

“Yeah. I’m not going to leave you Andy. I’m not Hedwig,” you spoke as if it were more of a promise rather than a statement.

You felt your stomach churn for a split second as you remembered how he scolded you earlier for talking down on Hedwig, but you smiled instead. The laughter you heard quickly subsiding your previous emotions.

“Okay,” He spoke almost uncertainly.

You could see the outline of him walking away before you felt him gently pull on your hand; making you follow him into the dark hallway which would eventually lead too, you could only guess, what would be his room.

Holding his hand like this almost felt weird but you couldn’t deny how almost.. right it felt too. Even perfect, you would dare say.

There was no way to guess what the rest of the night would entail but you didn’t exactly mind guessing; after all, how could you complain if you were to spend it with Andy?

You couldn’t. There was no way you could.

Whether it was platonic or not, spending the rest of the night right next to Andy, most likely in his clothes since you didn’t bother to bring any more of your own, sounded like heaven.

And since when did you ever complain about spending a night with someone that you had craved so bad?

Taglist: @michaellangdonstanaccount @langdonsexual @jimmason @blakescoven @dark-mei-rose @9layerdevilfoodcake @prophecy-is-inevitable @matildaofoz @beautyiswithinchaos @frenchlangdon @king-with-no-crovvn @melodylangdon @littledemondani @celestialrequiem @sojournmichael @ritualmichael @twilightzone24

Let me know if you would like to be added or removed to the taglist :)

#Andy Dolan x reader #Andy x reader #Andy Dolan fanfic #andy dolan fanfiction #Andy Dolan #my fic #will crosspost to ao3 shortly #not 100% happy w this but oh well lol

89 notes · View notes

iwaisuke · 3 years

Text

i like you so much, you'll know it

ft. kageyama tobio, semi eita, iwaizumi hajime x fem!reader

genre: fluff (prompts are based off lines of the song)

masterlist

a/n: from the c-drama a love so beautiful :) i wrote this at like 4am so sorry if its crap haha. not proof read either. also, sorry in advance if they're too ooc lol im a mess rn.

» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

i like your eyes, you look away when you pretend not to care i like the dimples on the corners of the smile that you wear. i like you more the world may know but dont be scared cause im falling deeper baby be prepared.

» today was your first day at karasuno highschool. honestly, you were so scared. that was up until you found out kageyama was going too.

» the two of you had been childhood friends due to each others grandparents knowing the others. you had been with him through his ups and downs. his victories and defeats. almost everything kageyama did, you were there with him.

» actually, you didnt know kageyama was going to karasuno until you walked outside your door to find the raven haired boy in the same school uniform as you

» "tobi? you never told me you were going to karasuno?" giving him a side eyed grin. "i thought you were planning on going to aoba johsai like oikawa senpai and iwaizumi senpai"

» you viewed kageyama as someone who expected others to reach his level in order to be a good match for him. he had a strong head on his shoulders. naturally gifted in volleyball, like everything was given to him on a gold platter. of course, he wasnt perfect and thats where you come in and keep him level headed. helping him understand his faults and weaknesses as well. doing your best to encourage the setter

» he let out a sigh. a slight frown forming on his face. "i didnt get in.." he quietly said. "karasuno has a good volleyball team though and i can feel myself growing here" he stated bodly

» and boy was he right. something about kageyama did changd that day. he usually was so bitter and angry. a very pessimistic look on life if he and others weren't at the top. maybe it was the orange haired boy, hinata, that the setter and you became friends with. and maybe it was his great senpai's who were patient with him and gave him the opportunity to grow

» kageyama started smiling more often. his small unnoticeable dimples showing. he became kinder. softer. and more carefree. he was a growing boy both mentally and physically.

» what you didnt realize was that not only was kageyama changing, you as well, had something changing and growing in your heart.

» but kageyama noticed. oh boy did he really notice, the way you seemed to become happier and livelier by the day. how the stars sparkled in your eyes when you talked about something you enjoyed. the kind of perfume you would wear and how you would tie your hair differently each day. the weird trinkets you just seemed to love that decorated your bag. but most importantly, how much bigger your heart has become, loving everyone and their faults. always encouraging and motivating him and his team.

» was she always like this? he would constantly think to himself. all of a sudden being hyperaware about you... but he would NEVER let you know that, let alone his senpai's. it was just too embarrassing. just thinking about the never ending teasing he'd get from tanaka and noya senpai made him shiver.

» all of these things he felt about you hit kageyama like a truck the day everyone started to wear their winter uniforms.

» picking you up to walk to school together was a normal thing since the two of you lived close, but how was kageyama suppose to do this now when you're standing in front of him. thigh high socks to keep your legs warm, an oversized jacket that you had borrowed from him a while back you forgot to return. white mittens to cover your cold hands and the slight blush on your face from the wind chill.

» "does it look weird?" you shyly asked. kageyama was silent. "ah.. give me a second. I'll go back in and change real qui-"

» kageyama tugged on your hand. "its fine. lets just go to school or we'll be late." refusing to look you in the eyes. heat rising to your cheeks as tobio dragged you along with him.

» your feelings for the setter had blossomed over the past few months. falling deeper and deeper into him, and at this point you felt like you couldnt hide it anymore. you just had to tell him. tell him all the wonderful things he's done. the way he's grown and how much he means to you.

» "tobi..." your soft voice spilling out. eyes closed, the fog of your breath coming out as you exhaled. "i lik-"

» you felt something wrap around your neck. "wait y/n..." kageyama spoke, interrupting what you were about to say. not gonna lie, you felt like your heart was about to be shattered like ice eventhough kageyama continued to wrap his scarf around your neck.

» "dont say it..." he quietly said as he began to walk forward without you.

» ah... is this what rejection feels like? i didnt even get to say it properly... your hands felt colder now that kageyama wasnt holding them anymore.

» he took a quick glance back at you. blush on his cheeks. "be prepared because i want to be the one to tell you first."

i like the way you try so hard when you play ball with your friends. i like the way you hit the notes in every song you're shinnin' i love the little things like when you're unaware, i catch you steal a glance and smile so perfectly

» semi eita, your 3 year heart throb from the moment he first spoke to you.

» at first, you had suppressed these feelings, telling yourself he would never look at you the same way. but something about the blonde tsundere struck a chord in your heart that you just couldn't forget.

» the two of you ended up becoming friends. closer than you had actually imagined within these past 3 years. doing everyday life with you. waking up and saving you a spot at breakfast. helping you with your studies in exchange for being his workout buddy and motivator.

» semi kept his tabs on you. your likes and dislikes. the things that made you smile and the things that made you groan in disgust, but he would never let you know that.

» to semi, you were his breath of fresh air. the song he has on repeat everyday. the kind of person who would keep him on his toes. in a good way of course

» "oi what are you daydreaming of this time?" semi asked as you zoned out while drinking your carton of strawberry milk. "hm? oh nothin. just thinkin about whats in store for us today!" reaching your arms above your head letting out a stretch. "i just know for a fact. today is gonna be a good day." semi chuckled at your optimistic claim. "how do you know for sure?" "i dont know how. i just do" you replied with a smile on your face.

» today, shiratorizawa had a practice match with aoba johsai and today, eita was picked to be in the starting line up. the pure joy that radiated from his body. maybe today was a really good day just like how you had said.

» semi took a quick glance up into the stands, you gave him a thumbs up and wished him good luck. his smile was brighter than you had ever seen it and his eyes shined like stars. he always told you that whatever chance he got on the court, he would be sure to not let his team down no matter what. he was in his zone. playing his best and sure enough, they had won all 3 matches.

» after practice, semi and you would hang out at his dorm afterwards. he liked to show you all the new songs he was working on. whether it was a cover or a song or a song he was writing on his own.

» the two of you leaned against the wall as you sat on semi's bed. his sheet music all sprawled out before him on his bed sheets. guitar in his arms and you beside him.

» "what are you working on semi?" "a song" "well obviously dum dum" you laughed, reaching out for a paper in front.

» "so who's the special lady?" you teased him as you read the lyrics. deep down inside you could only wish these words were meant for you. a blush formed on eita's face. "just... shut up about it... its not ready yet"

» it was getting late and falling asleep at semi's place was a normal occurrence at this point. your eyes became heavy and your head started bobbing.

» "sleepy?" eita asked as he noticed your eyes drooping. "mhm. sing for me semi? please?" his voice was so soft like a mothers touch yet somehow had the power to pierce through your soul sometimes. although, it never failed to help you fall asleep when you needed it.

» hesitantly, semi started humming. softly speaking some lyrics here and there. you didnt know where the tune was from so you listened the best you could.

» "... till the last of snow dissapears ... till a rainy day, becomes clear. never knew a love like this, now i can't let go..."

» your eyes had closed. slumber taking over you as you fell onto semi's shoulder.

» "im in love with you... and now you know..."

» yeah. today was a good day. just like you said it was going to be.

in a world devoid of life, you bring color. in your eyes i see the light, my future. always and forever i know i cant let you go. im in love with you and now you know

» to iwaizumi, unlike volleyball, oikawa, maki, mattsun, school, anything life threw at him; you were the thing in his life that was constant yet at the same time a whirlwind of new beginnings. not in a bad way though.

» ever since you were kids, you showed iwaizumi the beauty in things he would have never guessed had. he was bold and tended to look over things without giving them much thought. his eyes straight ahead to the trials before him. you on the other hand, stopped him and slowed him down from rushing into them blindly.

» "every moment is precious. you should learn to cherish it because you never know when it's gonna be your last" you always said

» your views of the world were beautiful compared to how cruel it actually was. naivety maybe? or maybe it was just because you were blessed with a kind soul.

» iwaizumi always knew he had feelings for you. you had been with him through thick and thin. he could depend on you and you could depend on him. in his eyes, you were the most beautiful person on earth. deep down he had hoped the two of you could stay like that forever. nothing could ever change that.

» or so he thought...

» "iwa chan~ you owe me a meat bun" oikawa whined as the group of friends were walking to the gym for volleyball practice. "shut up crappykawa. i already bought you one last week" "oi isn't that y/n over there?" maki said, shaking iwaizumi's shoulder.

» sure enough it was you. apparently you had told iwaizumi to go ahead of you today because you had something to take care of in the afternoon. telling him you'd meet up with him after practice was over. not thinking much of it, he bid you a farewell and went on in his day.

» "oooou by the looks of it, this is the perfect confession scene" mattsun teased. "oi stop messing around" iwaizumi's voice hoarse. not gonna lie, iwaizumi felt his heart drop when mattsun said that

» the 4 boys crept closer to see what was going on.

» there you were, standing in the middle of a classroom with a black haired boy. "mhm. definitely a confession." oikawa stated. "shut up tooru we cant hear" maki retorted.

» you weren't considered popular in school but that didnt mean people didnt know who you were. iwaizumi knew you were gorgeous and on top of that, smart, kind and one of the sweetest girls, so it was only natural that people would be drawn to you.

» they watched as the boy got closer and closer to you. voices barely being audible to the 4 boys outside. iwaizumi's heart could bear to see this right before his eyes.

» without even thinking, his feet moving on his own, iwaizumi barged into the room. all eyes towards him.

» "iwa what are you-" without letting you finish, iwa dragged you out of the classroom. "iwa where are you taking me" asking him as he took you to who knows where, leading you up the stairs of the school.

» up on the roof, he finally let go. "sorry..." he mumbled.

» "sorry for what iwa?" "for ruining that confession... i just-"

» "you just...-?"

» "i just love you ok?!"

» your heart shook at the resonance of his voice. iwa liked you? he liked you back?! wait no- he loved you.

» you had loved iwaizumi from the moment you met him and as the two of you grew up, your love for him only grew deeper. he was the only one you'd ever look at. the only one who would ever cross your mind. you had hoped he felt the same about you but he was always so busy with other things you only felt like you would be able to support him on the sidelines as he faced the world head on like he always does.

» just being in iwaizumi's presence was enough for you. no need to be greedier, you thought. its good to be content with what you have, but just knowing that he shares the same feelings... its ok to be a little greedy right?

» your silence being louder than it should have been, iwaizumi took it the wrong way. "look I know this isn't the greatest confession. heck it's not even the way I wanted to confess to you, and get it if you like that other guy, you don't have to-"

» shuting him up with a kiss, you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him in closer. needless to say, he was shocked, but embraced you as well.

» "you're overthinking too much iwa. that's so unlike you" you chuckled. his face bright red at the previous actions.

» "i love you. I've loved you for a long time actually. every single second. every moment we've shared. i cant picture myself with anyone but you hajime."

» iwa let out a sigh of relief. a smile being brought back onto his face. "good because all I know is that i cant let you go. in the past, present and even in the future...."

» the blue sky slowly changing into shades of coral warmed your heart even more on top of his sweet words that you've always longed to hear.

» "im in love with you, and now you know"

-» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

enjoy your order! have a great day!

#haikyuu x reader #hq fluff #kageyama tobio #kageyama x reader #kageyama fluff #semi eita #semi x reader #semi eita fluff #iwaizumi hajime #iwaizumi fluff #iwaizumi x reader #haikyuu fluff #yinny!drabbles

159 notes · View notes

my-writings-and-musings · 3 years

Note

Hello! I absolutely loved the feelings for the young liaison team kids, may I request some more of those please? With Megs, Roddy and Drift? (Maybe Cyclonus, if you don't mind as well?) thank you very much!

I love how so many asks want the bots to more or less adopt children who adopt them in turn, because that kind of softness is what our bots DESERVE. Rodimus, Drift (and Rung!) have their post here, the original is here, and below I'll have dear Megs and Cyclonus getting their dad vibes.

Megatron

·When the liaison program was decided upon, his presence on the ship had required some... additional precautions be taken, in order to convince the humans that any visitors to the Lost Light would be safe. Said measures had consisted mostly of him being warned repeatedly, both in and out of official correspondence, that he was to never be alone with the humans. Doing so or taking any other actions that made the humans feel even moderately unsafe would result in swift punishment. He'd understood every bit of the security measures, annoying as they were repetitive, and endeavored to follow them. Seeing young members of a species he'd attempted to exterminate wasn't something he wanted to seek out anyway. Thus, he'd been quite purposefully unavailable when the group came onboard.

·Massive as the ship is, however, he'd been unable to elude the liaisons forever. On one fateful day he'd encountered all of them by chance, and thankfully there had been other bots around to ensure Ultra Magnus wouldn't throw him in the brig for breaking any promises. The humans had looked just as surprised as he had to see the former Decepticon leader staring down at them. To their credit though, and his shock, they hadn't fled screaming in an instant. Rather, they'd cautiously approached him as a unit. The boldness had been so unexpected he'd actually felt quite like fleeing himself once they'd started asking questions. With the other Autobots around he'd been forced to stand his ground, and thankfully the humans hadn't been nearly as aggressive as he'd been expecting, keeping most of their questions in the realm of polite but naive curiosity. Perhaps the Fools Energon was simply getting in his head, but he'd walked away from the encounter believing it to have been... pleasant.

·At the next chance meeting, made possible by everyone on the ship relaxing his restrictions, he's admittedly a little happy to see the liaisons. It happens in Swerve's bar, and they're actually able to converse with minimal oversight. The opportunity to get to know humans in depth is one he explores with caution though. Despite his current goal of righting past wrongs, he can't simply undo what he attempted to carry out on this species, as friendly as the young humans are to him. Knowing that fact is what makes him ache despite the pleasant conversation. They talk of their dreams, and ask him about innocent things in return, with particular fascination for his size and strength. Such bright and vivid souls, that he was once utterly indifferent to... How many brilliant lives like them did he snuff out without a care?

·Yet he keeps talking to the little ones whenever the opportunity presents itself. They might be some of the first beings to speak so casually to him in eons, and once they start asking about politics... Well, he can't resist sharing the beliefs he'd once thought too optimistic. As always, each liaison proves a spirited debate expert, despite being small enough to fit comfortably in his palm. Ignoring the rules, they often end up doing just that, though it's more for convenience as he doesn't want them to strain themselves shouting to be heard. Inevitably the restrictions on him loosen to the point he actually begins sitting with them gathered across his massive frame like birds on an oversized but comfortable tree, and through them he gets little samples of earth life in the form of stories and videos on their communication devices.

·It's the happiest he's ever been, and that's probably why he inevitably caves to his self loathing, the joy these little ones bring him forcing back memories of his many crimes against their kind. Even seeing them is a right he shouldn't feel so entitled to. For their sake, he decides to avoid them going forward, to protect them from himself and his legacy in addition to the weight of his conscience. Of course, the liaisons very quickly notice that they aren't seeing him around and one day decide to seek out answers. To his surprise, he fails to simply explain himself through a gentle lie when they eventually find him, as if their faces compel him to speak truthfully. He breaks and reminds them of what he is and what he's done, and that staying away is for their own good, especially considering he can hardly be trusted. As always, they surprise him.

·In total agreement, they all reassure him of a few things. First is that they're all well aware of who he is and what he's done. Second is that they knew that when they decided to approach him, and that his efforts to redeem himself have not gone unnoticed, which is why they've bonded with him as they have. They made the choice to get to know him, and while they can't speak for the many factors of the Cybertronian conflict beyond their understanding, they are allowed to decide they like who he is here and now. Had he a less hardened spark, their words would have made him weep. Instead, he quietly thanks them and promises to think on what they've said. In the end, he honors their decision by returning to the locations they expect him, and they continue as they did before. This time, however, he's more than just gentle while they clamber over him. He's protective as only a bot of his size can be to beings he truly appreciates as his found family.

Cyclonus

·The emotion he felt upon learning of the incoming liaisons was best summarized as "mild curiosity" at best. Not that he looked down upon the incoming crewmembers, but he just didn't think them worthy of much fuss, and only intended to learn enough to effectively avoid them going forward. A not so subtle warning not to intimidate them with his appearance cemented the emotion. On the day of their arrival, he met the whole group quite by chance during their introductory tour, and to his chagrin each one was fascinated by him in particular. Unable to even tell them apart at first, he'd been somewhat placated by their curiosity for things his own kind often overlooks. For the sake of cultural preservation, he decides that answering their questions won't be too much of a burden if done from time to time.

·Now reasonably well settled amongst the crew, he doesn't find it too hard to handle the socialization with multiple humans at once, though admittedly he's a little concerned when he learns of their age. Allowing what are essentially slow developing protoforms to explore on an alien vessel seems... irresponsible. Yet their youth does explain their energy, especially as they ask him many questions about topics he enjoys speaking of, starting with his accent leading to a grand recounting of Tetrahexian history. Unlike so many bots, they gladly listen to him go on about the glory days. Their little eyes go wide as he recounts technological wonders long gone. Had he less control it would have brought a smile to his face, especially when he lets slip his knowledge of the Old Cybertronian language and soon has a whole group begging to learn it.

·While he's hardly gone soft, he does allow the humans a touch more... freedom, in how they interact with him compared to others. They even enjoy the privilege of resting atop his shoulders or in his arms, though that's purely to save his back the strain of constantly bending down to their height. Any bot that says otherwise is swiftly reminded of his combat prowess. He begins to learn each human's unique personality and quirks in time, especially how some are better with history and others excelled at language. Learning bits about their own culture was surprisingly interesting as well, with pictures and videos of long gone human civilizations proving that some of Earth's occupants had decent aesthetic taste.

·Without knowing it, he more or less avoided discussing his own past with the little group, gently steering the conversation each time it ventured too close to the personal. The reason became blindly apparent when they learned of his former affiliation and the crimes he'd committed while sworn to it. Though not present for the revelation, he's certain of their reaction being one of fear and disgust, and immediately withdraws from the crew to hole himself up. Emotions too powerful to stifle force him to isolate for the sake of what remains of his pride. Not even knowing how exactly the humans found out, he's not particularly inclined to discover the manner, as the damage has been done. Admittedly, he was foolish to assume it wouldn't happen sooner.... Regardless, he knows he can never face them again.

·Unbeknownst to him, the revelation was a mistake, and one not met with any particular judgement. The liaisons were only concerned when he failed to appear at standard places of meeting, and as a unit agreed to check up on the bot they'd all come to admire. It had taken all of them knocking to get a coherent response through the door, and Cyclonus had cursed himself for being unable to simply tell them to leave, his spark indeed proving too soft at the sight of them all together. When he'd allowed the group inside, the last thing he'd been expecting was a coordinated embrace between the lot of them, but that had proven to be their tactic straight away. It had proven cunning and effective. A plurality of reasons for his shame had melted in the face of open hearted acceptance, with the entire group promising that who he had been mattered little compared to who he was now. To prevent a humiliating display of tears he'd accepted their assurance without fuss, but had indeed been convinced by the sheer strength of their conviction to continue meeting them for their little talks. Despite himself, he'd actually smiled the first time reuniting with them afterwards, his demeanor growing warmer in their presence from then on as he promised to himself no harm would ever befall them. They had accepted him, and he would do the same in return. Nothing in his past had ever compared to the treasure of simply knowing them.

#transformers #maccadam #mtmte #more than meets the eye #lostlight #lost light #ll #idw #tf #my writing #my asks #anon #requests #liaisons #human reader #self insert #megatron #cyclonus

148 notes · View notes

romantichopelessly · 3 years

Text

Peppermint, Ginger, Lemongrass and Truth

This is part of the @sanderssidesgiftxchange for @randomfactscenteral based on their wishes for LAMP and a fantasy AU! I had a lot of fun writing this and I hope that you enjoy it! <3

Synopsis: Patton Bellerose is a witch. This wouldn't be a problem, if he didn't have to find out a way to tell his three boyfriends, Logan, Virgil and Roman before sunset on his birthday.

Words: 2.6k

----

Orange peel for blessings and luck, nettle leaves for courage, and plain old chamomile for encouraging him to finally stop overthinking and get to sleep. Patton let the tea steep for four minutes before pulling his kitty cat mug off the bottom shelf and pouring himself a steaming mug.

Patton paused, staring into the amber swirls of the tea. He deliberated a moment, remembering his older brother’s ever common reminders to Patton to take his magic seriously, before he promptly ignored said reminders and added two heaping spoonfuls of honey.

Across the room, the digital clock on his microwave read 11:27. Patton huffed. There was nothing more frustrating than being unable to fall asleep. Patton had always hated restlessness, especially when he was alone in his tiny apartment.

As if on cue, there was a tiny croak from beside Patton’s elbow. Patton lifted his head from where he had let it drop into his arms and looked to his left. He squinted--it was hard to see in the dim kitchen lights without his glasses, which he had stupidly left on his bedside table in the next room--and made a little face.

“What are you croaking at?” Duchess, the frog that was sitting on Patton’s kitchen bar like she owned the place managed to look completely unimpressed. Patton almost smiled. Were he not so worried about tomorrow, he would have.

Duchess croaked again.

Patton sighed, pulling his mug closer and taking a long sip of his tea. “By this time tomorrow, you’ll be able to speak to me, Chessy. There’s no use lecturing me now. You’ll have the rest of my life to do that.”

And it was true. Despite the usual lifespan of Duchess’s type of frog, as Patton’s familiar, she was cursed (gifted? Patton would have to ask her how she felt about that when he could tomorrow) to live just as long as Patton himself did.

Tomorrow, which began in less than half an hour now, January 15th, was Patton Bellerose’s 21st birthday. And like every other member of the Bellerose family on their 21st birthdays, Patton would be gaining his full powers as soon as the sun set tomorrow.

Which meant that he would have to tell his boyfriends that he was a witch before then.

Patton hadn’t meant to put it off so long. Really, he had planned to tell them weeks ago, things had just… never fallen into place.

It wasn’t that he thought that they would react badly. Patton had been slowly showing them little displays of his powers for months now and they hadn’t shown any sign of fear or outrage yet. Of course, Logan often explained away Patton’s impeccable luck or way with plants as probability and experience, and if Patton wasn’t so unbelievably fond of him, he would have been frustrated at his hardheadedness.

If Logan had figured it out on his own, Patton would never have to deal with telling them at all. Rather unfair of him to be so picky with where he employed his massive intelligence.

To make matters worse, Patton couldn’t tell even partially how the conversation would go down, because he had never had a talent for prophecy. Not like his brother did, at least, and Patton had already exhausted that route. J refused to perform a reading for Patton’s birthday and whether or not his boyfriends would react well to the knowledge of magic existing. So, Patton would have to approach this like any other human, completely in the dark. The uncertainty of telling the three men that he loved more than anything about his biggest secret was… well… keeping Patton up at night.

He couldn’t stop himself from envisioning their reactions. Patton was usually an optimist. He dealt well with luck magic and hopeful manifestation, which more often than not kept his mind away from anxious spirals.

Virgil would have known what to do in this moment. Or, at the very least, he would have kept Patton company while he worried, and oftentimes that was more than enough. Patton smiled softly at the thought.

Then of course, thinking of Virgil pulled his thoughts right back to what Virgil would say tomorrow when Patton told him who--or, rather, what--he was.

He could see it clearly. Virgil was very superstitious. He feared the unknown like no one Patton had ever met before. If--When--Patton were to tell him about magic, Virgil would surely fall into a spiral, questioning all that he knew. He did that at least twice a week as it was!

Patton groaned, burying his face in his hands. His tea was cooling, forgotten on the counter beside him.

Maybe he should start by telling Roman or Logan, then. They would be able to help him break the news to Virgil.

Patton peaked his eyes out between his fingers and looked up at the ceiling.

He could see it now. Roman was a firm believer in fate and romance. He adored fairytales and princess movies, so would it really be such a reach for him if Patton told him that he was a witch? He would be excited about it, right?

Except… Except Patton had been over this route of thinking before.

Roman, above all else, valued honesty. The foundation for all good relationships was truth, after all. His hopeless romanticism was one of his best qualities, in Patton’s humble opinion, but it would also be Patton’s downfall. After dating for nearly two years, to come out with a truth bomb like “Hey RoRo! Did you know that magic is actually real, and I’ve been lying to you about who I am ever since we met? I’m a witch and I do magic! So, would you like to meet my familiar?”

Even if Roman didn’t take Patton’s confession as a breach of trust, there was only one other feasible response that Patton could envision.

What if Roman expected Patton to do magic for him?

Patton shook that thought away. He should be ashamed of himself, thinking so lowly of his own boyfriend. Roman had never given Patton any reason to think that he would do such a thing. They loved each other. And that love extended past anything. Even magic.

Right?

Patton reached blindly out, fumbling for the cup of now lukewarm tea on the counter in front of him. He took a bracing sip.

His boyfriends loved him. Virgil loved him. Roman loved him. Logan loved him.

Logan would not take the news well at all, though. Patton knew this for a fact. Logan based most of his opinions and world views on concrete facts. What would he say once Patton told him that the things he once knew to be fact--that magic did not exist, for instance--were actually incorrect? It would shake the foundation of his entire world view.

Patton could easily envision the look on Logan’s face. The bewildered furrow of his brow. The slight gape of his mouth. The shock and disbelief in his beautiful blue eyes. The betrayal that would mask his face.

Patton’s heart ached.

He was almost thankful that he did not have a gift for premonition. The only way that he was going to make it through tomorrow was knowing that there was a chance--even though it was slim. Very slim. So gosh darn slim, in Patton’s huckleberry humbled opinion--that that expression of earth shattering betrayal would never cross Logan’s face. No amount of nose kisses could erase that--or the imagined fear in Virgil’s eyes, or the disillusioned disappointment in Roman’s.

Patton didn’t sleep that night.

----

“Patton? Darling?”

A hand settled on the small of Patton’s back, startling him out of his own mind. He blinked, smiling reflexively at Logan’s concerned expression. “Yes, honey?”

There was a small furrow in between Logan’s perfectly sculpted brows. Patton wanted to rub it away with the pad of his thumb. He wanted to crack a joke that would make Logan wince, but bring that sparkle that he liked to pretend didn’t exist to his eyes.

“You were distracted again.” It was Roman who spoke this time. He was sitting on the other end of the picnic blanket that the four of them had laid out in the clearing that day. Virgil was sitting in his lap, leaning back against his chest. One of Roman’s hands was in his hair, gently combing through it.

The sight made Patton’s heart flutter for a moment.

His three, beautiful, wonderful, thoughtful boyfriends had surprised him with a picnic for his birthday. And what a lovely day it had been. Just the four of them, enjoying one another’s company…

But now it was almost sunset. And Patton still had not spilled the beans.

How could he, when Virgil was perfectly relaxed, soaking up the sun, and Roman was laughing loudly, his eyes shining, and Logan was humming softly, taking in this perfect moment? Patton bit the inside of his cheek. He knew that he was just stalling, but the idea of possibly shattering this perfect moment was making something in his stomach curdle. Out of the corner of his eye he could see the grass underneath his palm start to wither.

“Sorry.” His voice was small, almost squeaky, but it was all he could hope to get out. He moved his hand.

Virgil opened his eyes. As soon as they met Patton’s, he knew that he was done for. Concern and knowing filled Virgil’s hazel eyes. Patton would have to say something quickly--before his boyfriend jumped to the worst possible conclusion.

He must have hesitated just too long, however, the words stuck in his throat like a wad of chewing gum, because Virgil spoke before he could. “What’s wrong, Pat?” Virgil’s voice was gruff. Patton closed his eyes, shame and guilt for causing his boyfriends to worry burning in his chest. He knew that voice of Virgil’s. It was the exact one that he had feared. Virgil was anxious.

“Nothing.” It was a feeble attempt, and they all knew it. Patton felt like he was going to be sick. He wished that he had cast a calming spell on himself that morning.

By now, all three of his boyfriends had their eyes trained on him, with varying degrees of worry on their faces. “Patton-” Logan started, but Virgil stopped him.

“No. It isn’t nothing. Patton, what is going on? You’ve been acting off, like, all week.” Patton gulped. Virgil’s voice softened a bit. “You can tell us. Please. What are you so worried about, babe?”

Patton opened his mouth. And closed it again. As if he could sense the conflict going on inside of Patton, Roman shifted forward, careful not to move Virgil off of his lap and grasped Patton’s free hand. Logan’s hand, which was still on the small of Patton’s back, began to move in small, soothing circles.

“I’m a witch.” He blurted, his eyes squeezed shut once again. “I mean- my whole family is. I’ve been meaning to tell you for a while now, but I just- I couldn’t- and now it’s my birthday and in a few minutes, when the sun sets, my full powers are going to come in, and I knew that I wouldn’t be able to hide it when that happened, so I’ve been trying to tell you, but you were all so happy and I didn’t want to ruin the mood, but I’ve been lying and- I just- I’m sorry.”

He opened one eye. Just a crack. Just enough to see his boyfriend’s faces in the dimming afternoon light.

Logan looked shocked, to say the least. Patton could practically see the gears turning in his mind, turning over Patton’s words and examining them from every angle. His hand had paused in its comforting movements on Patton’s back, but he didn’t dare complain. It felt like there was a little chip in his heart.

Roman looked surprised, his gentle smile frozen on his face and his lips parted slightly, as if paused in the middle of an intake of breath. His expression was borderline unreadable. Patton suppressed a wince.

Patton’s gaze slipped over to his third boyfriend, his heart heavy in his chest. But Virgil wasn’t frozen like Logan or Roman. He didn’t even look surprised.

He didn’t look afraid.

Patton did not allow himself to feel hopeful for what that could mean.

Virgil looked almost… calmer than he had before Patton had said what was on his mind. His shoulders were more relaxed, and he was leaning back against Roman once again. He didn’t look at all like Patton had feared. There was no terror. No alarm. It was as if… as if this wasn’t a shock at all.

“V-Virgil?” Patton’s voice was almost inaudible. Out of the corner of his eyes, he could see Logan and Roman beginning to move, as if they had just returned to their bodies.

Virgil slid forward, off of Roman’s lap. Roman made a small noise of disagreement, and Patton felt a delirious urge to smile. He didn’t. Virgil wrapped his hands around both of Patton’s, bringing his attention away from the cataclysm in his mind. Patton noticed right then that Roman must have dropped his hands somewhere in the middle of his rambling confession.

“It’s okay, Patton.” Patton blinked, startled. He glanced back at Roman and Logan, who looked just as confused as he was. Virgil rubbed his thumbs across Patton’s knuckles, and he turned his attention forward again. “I… sort of already guessed.”

Patton’s mouth dropped open.

“What?” Roman shrieked. “You- You guessed that-”

Virgil shrugged, but there was a tension in his shoulders again as he looked defensively back at Roman. “Yes. It was sort of obvious.”

“I do not believe that obvious is the word that you are looking for, Virgil.” Logan responded. “How could you have guessed-”

“Please.” Virgil rolled his eyes, cutting Logan off. “Have you known anyone who is as good with plants as Patton?” Logan blinked, but did not respond. “Or what about how good he is with animals? Or how the weather is always perfect when all four of us go out?” Logan blinked. It looked as if something was dawning on him. Virgil continued. “And how Patton’s tea always cures our headaches? Has that ever happened before you met Patton? It had to be something like this. It’s-”

“Magic!” Roman gasped, his hand on his chest and a sparkle returning to him. He looked at Patton with wonder in his eyes. “It’s magic! You- Really-”

“Duh.” Virgil answered for him. Patton couldn’t stop himself from the incredulous laugh that burst from him.

There was a pause. Logan, who had been very obviously mulling over the information that Patton and Virgil had just placed before him, spoke next. “How much… exactly-”

Patton’s heart skipped a beat, tendrils of fear creeping back into his chest. However, once again, Virgil saved him by answering first.

“Not now, Logan.” Logan looked a bit put out by this response, but Virgil nudged him jovially with his elbow. “Later. Right now-” Patton looked up. The sky was a burning orange. “The sun is setting. Patton?”

Patton took a deep breath. “Yes?” He wished that his worry wasn’t so obvious.

This time Roman leaned forward and placed a hand on his shoulder. “You know we love you, right? This could never change anything about how we feel about you.” A lump grew in Patton’s throat. “You’re our person, our love! And we will be here for you.”

Logan cleared his throat and tried for a smile. It made something in Patton’s chest fill up like a balloon. “Yes. We will have plenty of time to discuss, but our love for you is never up for debate.”

Three faces looked back at Patton, pride and love glowing from them as the bright golden light of the sun haloed them like the angels they were. The sun set behind them, and they held him the whole time. Evening set upon the park and the four men in it, and tears welled in Patton’s eyes as they began to glow a brilliant silvery blue.

#sanders sides #LAMP #CALM #patton sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #Logan sanders #ts patton #ts virgil #ts logan #ts roman #ts lamp #ts calm

91 notes · View notes

ernestpembroke · 2 years

Text

MBTI → ENTP-T (The Debater) Enneagram → 7 Alignment → Chaotic Good Love Language → Words of Affirmation

MBTI: ENTP-T / The Debater

Quick-witted and audacious, Debaters aren’t afraid to disagree with the status quo. In fact, they’re not afraid to disagree with pretty much anything or anyone. Few things light up people with this personality type more than a bit of verbal sparring – and if the conversation veers into controversial terrain, so much the better.

It would be a mistake, though, to think of Debaters as disagreeable or mean-spirited. Instead, people with this personality type are knowledgeable and curious, with a playful sense of humor, and they can be incredibly entertaining. They simply have an offbeat, contrarian idea of fun – one that involves a healthy dose of spirited debate.

Debaters are known for their rebellious streak. For this personality type, no belief is too sacred to be questioned, no idea is too fundamental to be scrutinized, and no rule is too important to be broken, or at least thoroughly tested. Sometimes Debaters even rebel against their own beliefs by arguing the opposing viewpoint – just to see how the world looks from the other side.

As Debaters see it, most people are too ready to do as they’re told and blindly conform to social norms, pressures, and standards. Debaters enjoy the mental exercise of questioning the prevailing mode of thought, and they take a certain pleasure in uncovering the value of underdogs and outliers. Their active minds can’t help but rethink the things that everyone else takes for granted and push them in clever new directions.

While Debater personalities love to brainstorm and think big, they tend to avoid getting caught doing the “grunt work” of implementing their ideas. To some extent, this makes sense – Debaters have far too many thoughts and suggestions to keep track of them all, let alone turn them into reality. But unless Debaters develop the willingness to identify and actually follow through on their priorities, they may struggle to harness their full potential.

Not every occasion calls for this personality type’s default contrarianism, and most people can only stand to have their beliefs questioned and their feelings brushed aside for so long. As a result, Debaters may find that their quarrelsome fun burns many bridges, often inadvertently. Debaters are respected for their vision, confidence, knowledge, and keen sense of humor – but unless they cultivate a bit of sensitivity, they may struggle to maintain deeper relationships or even to achieve their professional goals.

Enneagram: 7 / The Enthusiast

Sevens are extroverted, optimistic, versatile, and spontaneous. Playful, high-spirited, and practical, they can also misapply their many talents, becoming over-extended, scattered, and undisciplined. They constantly seek new and exciting experiences, but can become distracted and exhausted by staying on the go. They typically have problems with impatience and impulsiveness. At their Best: they focus their talents on worthwhile goals, becoming appreciative, joyous, and satisfied.

As Sevens speed up their pursuit of whatever seems to offer freedom and satisfaction, they tend to make worse choices, and they are less able to be satisfied because everything is experienced indirectly, through the dense filter of their fast-paced mental activity. The result is that Sevens end up anxious, frustrated, and enraged, with fewer resources available to them physically, emotionally, or financially. They may end up ruining their health, their relationships, and their finances in their search for happiness.

Key Motivations: Want to maintain their freedom and happiness, to avoid missing out on worthwhile experiences, to keep themselves excited and occupied, to avoid and discharge pain.

Alignment: Chaotic Good

A chaotic good character acts as his conscience directs him with little regard for what others expect of him. He makes his own way, but he's kind and benevolent. He believes in goodness and right but has little use for laws and regulations. He hates it when people try to intimidate others and tell them what to do. He follows his own moral compass, which, although good, may not agree with that of society.

Love Language: Words of Affirmation

Words of affirmation are words that communicate your love, appreciation, and respect for another person. They're positive words and phrases used to uplift someone. What's more, these compliments and words of encouragement don't have to be said directly to the person.

#theseason;task

4 notes · View notes

tsukkisbean · 4 years

Note

Congratulations on 500! Can I get A3 with Kuroo, please?

beep beep...a3 detected...thunk!

your item has arrived, thank you for using tsukkibean’s vending machine! we hope to see you again in the future!

pairing: kuroo x gn!reader

genre: angst, rich kid!au

warnings: sad kuroo

word count:1181

prompt: a3. “i don’t need you to succeed”

a/n: (1) i’m sorry this was an angst please don’t hate me I FELT SO HORRIBLE AFTER YOU SENT AN ASK TELLING ME HOW YOU HOPED KUROO WASN’T ANGST 😭 (2) there’s a hamilton reference in there so if y’all catch that ily. (3) the hecatoncheires is a creature from greek mythology with 100 hands, don’t ask me how to pronounce it (4) THANK YOU KAT FOR BETA READING <3

kuroo wasn’t afraid of much, yet something about the dark chilled him to the bone. until now he’d been able to convince himself that his fears probably stemmed from some sort of childhood trauma. maybe it was because of that old oak tree outside his window that looked eerily similar to the hecatoncheires. or the fact that he’d watched one too many horror movies past sundown. though plausible options, both were very much incorrect.

blindly he searches for his phone hidden among the sea of pillows. once in his grasp, the sickeningly bright screen tells him it’s 2:30am. right on time.

today marks the 365th night in which his slumber had become plagued with nightmares. each dream was always different, yet they all ended the exact same way, waking him at the exact same time. it was the cruel way his mind reminded him of his past mistakes.

removing himself from the warmth of his blankets, he makes his way through the empty halls towards his study. it’s become a sort of routine for him, writing down each nightmare just as he remembered them. he hoped that maybe by compartmentalizing his feelings, he’d be able to understand what triggered the onset of nightmares.

but tonight he decides to try something different. once seated at his desk, pen in hand, his hand begins to race across the page.

to my dearest, y/n

did you notice where i placed the comma? i’m sure you would. after all, you were always the one that said the placement of a comma can change the entire meaning of a sentence.

it feels unsettling, writing to you like this. i guess it’s because i haven’t really gotten over the fact that you’re no longer with me. but if i remember correctly (who am i trying to kid, i would never forget this), you were always a sucker for these type of things - sappy love letters that is.

so that’s what this is i guess. my last love letter to you.

where do i begin? “from the beginning” you’d probably say. i miss your sarcasm.

if i’m being honest, i wasn’t too fond of the idea of meeting you, but i’m sure you felt the same. after all, who wants to get stuck in a business marriage, especially in this day and age? plus meeting your future partner in the spring, how cliché.

thank god my friends were at that dinner though, right? youth these days really know how to lighten up the atmosphere. at least them being there gave me the chance to tell you my nifty chemistry joke. do you remember how it went? i’ll tell you again anyways: why did carbon marry hydrogen? they bonded well from the minute they met. don’t think i didn’t see you try not to choke on your water.

i consider our second meeting our first date. i went in with the expectation that it would be purely business talk and it’d be over within the hour. but then you showed up all out of breath in a casual outfit, hair stuck to your sweaty forehead from the summer heat. from a ways away i could see your caretakers, in a panic trying to catch up to you. you pointed into the distance, trying to distract my bodyguard and despite being a trained professional, they fell for it. how thrilling it was to run through the busy streets of tokyo with you, escaping our obligations even if it was only for a few hours.

even to this day i’m not sure if you meant to drag me along because you didn’t want to hurt my feelings or because you wanted me by your side. whatever the reason, i’m glad you did because that was probably the most fun i had in awhile. i missed feeling like i had the freedom to do anything i wanted. it can get tiresome, you know? acting like the perfect child. who am i kidding, you know that better than anyone.

our relationship only spiraled from then on, and soon enough the leaves began to change colour. everyday you showed me a new way to live my life, and so it didn’t take me long to figure out that i’d fallen for you. i can’t tell you how happy i was when you agreed to marry me on your own accord. i’ll admit the way i asked you was kind of cheesy, but can you blame a guy? you were the hydrogen to my carbon. a relationship formed out of obligation, only to become something so much more meaningful. we were made to last.

you know, i’ve been having nightmares since you left. i’ve tried to tell myself it’s just a phase, that eventually things will go back to normal. but after 365 days i think i can finally admit that i hate the night not because i’m afraid of the dark but because it leaves me vulnerable and exposed to my own demons.

my nightmares start out different but they always end in the same way. all i can see is your figure, walking into the distance. no matter how hard i run, how loud i scream, you never look back. but today was different. i wanted to wake up so bad, i couldn’t live through this scene. not again.

this time you did turn back, the words you spoke held so much resentment and anger, “i don’t need you to succeed”. your eyes burned with so much hatred, it was probably enough to melt the snow. my heart is still aching as i write this. it was exactly like the day you left me.

i’m sorry i lashed out at you when you said you wanted to be a writer. you were always the more optimistic one between us, and i was always jealous of you for that. when you suggested we pack up and leave - that we start anew and do the things we really wanted to do, i wanted to. i swear.

you were right to call me a coward. i was scared of leaving the life that was so meticulously planned out for me. i thought i owed it to my parents to inherit their company, to carry on the family legacy. i thought i could provide you with the best life possible if i did everything they told me. i was afraid that if i took that leap of faith only to fall flat on my face, you’d leave me. funny how things work out. truth is, all i needed was you by my side.

you know i attended your book signing yesterday. you looked so happy, chatting with your fans about your newest release. i don’t think you saw me, and even if you did, you probably pretended not to recognize me. after seeing you yesterday, i realized something.

y/n, you were wrong to say you didn’t need me. i like to think that i created that fire within you by calling your dreams childish.

and it’s going to haunt me forever.

forever yours, kuroo

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu scenarios #kuroo x reader #haikyuu angst #haikyuu x you #hq x you #hq angst #kuroo angst #kuroo testurou angst #kuroo tetsurou #haikyuu imagines #mystery bean 🔍

89 notes · View notes

tundrainafrica · 3 years

Text

Title: Division of Labor (1/?)

Summary:

"The past years, we have noticed a lot of our fresh high school graduates knew nothing about responsibilities the that awaited them outside high school and even college. Many students do not master budgeting, taxes, household planning, loans and we hope to raise a generation who can navigate the adult world without the consequences of bad decisions they are bound to make going in blindly..."

Paradis High school starts a program incorporating adulting into their curriculum and Hange and Levi are paired together.

Note: From request of @a-golden-hearted-snk-fan. See this link for the request

Other Chapters: 2 3 4

Link to cross-postings: AO3

"Homemaking is strategy. It's like going to war but you are going to war every single day in your household. Yes, the difficult battles come and go! But you always need to be ready! You need to consider time! Resources! The division of labor!"

The division of labor.

Years of school had jaded Levi enough to know that although all groupworks were a division of labor, they were never really a fair one.

Levi was looking forward to a homemaking class, completely aware that his passions lay there. The realization that he had to cooperate with someone and entrust half his grade on that person, almost completely destroyed the excitement he initially held for the subject.

He looked around him to see his classmates were as confused about the new project Mr. Shadis was prattling on about. Home Economics had a solid reputation as the most useless class offered. Most people in their school had plans of going to college in his school and no one really asked in college entrance exams what the difference of baking soda and baking flour is.

They were in their 3rd year of high school though and their homeroom teacher Keith Shadis dropped a bomb, a very important yet painful fact in front of them. That year, their home economics class was going to be incorporated into every subject and their performance was going to play a huge part in determining their grade average at the end of the year.

Levi had no problem having his cleaning skills or cooking skills tested. In fact, he was sure his school performance would get a great pick up from whatever they were going to be doing in that class.

But really? I need to do it with a partner?

A small bag was being passed around the class. Levi looked around him to see that everyone had pulled a piece of paper from the bag. He dug deep into it (for good luck) and pulled out the first one he could grab at the bottom.

Levi opened the paper to see the number seven messily scrawled on the paper. What does this mean? Levi couldn't help but note that seven was a lucky number, and a superstitious side within him was optimistic for a moment.

“Who got number seven?”

Suddenly the room was in chaos as people stood from their seats and said their names out loud. Levi stayed frozen on his seat. He had recognized the owner of the other number seven from the other side of the room.

Her voice was too loud, piercing and distinct. Of course it would be distinct, he had been her classmate for years and had been a victim of her tirades always in class, about taxonomies, photosynthesis and research projects. Everyone else had found her amazing, had called her a genius if not eccentric. Levi on the other hand had been unimpressed, too unimpressed that avoiding her seemed like the best option.

Levi had tried to keep himself a fair distance away from her since with the impression she gave most people at first glance, Levi had concluded a long time ago that they would just not get along as close friends. Would he have preferred any other partner? Most likely.

“Here…” Levi muttered, as he raised his hand half way up.

“Levi! So I guess it’s going to be you and me the whole year huh?”

Levi choked. “The whole year?”

“Didn’t you hear Mr. Shadis, this is a year long project." Hange grinned. "Well, at least we’re both working with a friend.”

At the least, Levi had tried to keep himself a fair distance away. He and Hange had known each other for years, having gone to the same grade school, middle school and high school. It was unavoidable that he had had to work together with her multiple times. They had a long and unavoidable history. Oddly though, that was enough for Hange to assume that they were friends.

Levi was quick to dismiss her rapid assumptions on her closeness with people based on history, as his thoughts flew to what could be the start of a professional relationship between them. They were going to work together for a whole year after all.

Hange was not a bad groupmate. In fact, she was studious and grade conscious enough to produce quality outputs. That was the only point that Levi could bring to the table as he felt that itch of what could have been dread inside him as Hange settled on the seat next to him.

Shadis only confirmed Hange’s statement and the fear within Levi. “Be friendly, or at the least civil. You will be working with your partner for the whole school year.”

Levi briefly side glanced to the empty seat next to him. For a second he held on to a glimmer of hope that his actual partner was sitting next to him and the interaction with Hange had been a misunderstanding on his end or a bad dream, maybe the groupmate she referred to as a friend was someone else. Within a few seconds, he had ended up looking back at Hange in defeat and he had started to accept the bleak situation set up in front of him.

Shadis narrowed his eyes. “Mind you, this project holds a huge chunk of your grade for every single subject. Don’t take this project for granted if you want to graduate.

Division of Labor

“We started this project to help you juniors prepare for the real world. The past years, we have noticed a lot of our fresh high school graduates knew nothing about responsibilities that awaited them outside high school and even college. Many students do not master budgeting, taxes, household planning, loans and we hope to raise a generation who can navigate the adult world without the consequences of bad decisions you are bound to make going in blindly....”

It was their academics coordinator Erwin who had explained the whole project to them, an adult simulation project which required them to make decisions in a simulated setting on top of school work.

And the first topic that came into question was occupation. There was not much to decide upon though, the teachers had used the results of their career test to determine the occupations they would be taking up. The results were written out on papers distributed to everyone in the class with the mean wage which they were to be planning their lives around.

"Computer programmer?" Levi raised his eyebrows at the paper in front of him.

“You have the option to work with the two incomes as a couple or you can choose to have one person work while the other stays at home. Note, both options will have consequences.”

There were murmurs among their classmates. The only conversation Levi could pick up was that between Eren and MIkasa.

"Mikasa… you got doctor. What else would you want?" To her right, Eren looked nervous as if the fate of their project was on the line with Mikasa's question. It probably was.

"I just think someone should stay at home and manage the house. I'll work freelance," Mikasa said.

"I'll manage the house!”

Mikasa shook her head. "I don't want you to have to give up your dreams for this." Her expression was so serious, for a second Levi had forgotten that this was a school project.

Erwin smiled. "That's a good way to look at things Mikasa." He turned to the class. "You have the option to build on a one income household if you feel that's best."

"What do you think Levi?" Hange asked.

Working with two incomes seemed like the logical option. Note, both options will have consequences. The way Erwin had said it made it seem like both decisions were going to be bad either way. Levi shrugged. If he was going to make potentially bad decisions, might as well do what he would have done in real life. "I'll stay at home." He didn't like the idea of working as a computer programmer anyway.

"That works,” Hange said, her eyes fixed on the paper in front of her.

From his angle, Levi could see Hange fiddling with her phone under the table. “You seem confident about us working with just your income. What job did you get?”

Hange slid the paper towards Levi face up. Freelance Researcher: $3,788/month.

Levi had know idea how much his own uncle made but $3,788 a month seemed like a decent amount to make a month. He looked to Hange who had already started doing her own research under the table and taking notes.

Erwin had started writing on the board the next few steps. Buy a house. Design the house. Have a kid...

“Wait, do we have to have a kid?” It was Connie who had popped the question a majority of the class had wanted to ask.

Erwin looked back at them and smiled. “That’s a good question.”

Levi could not help but notice a glimpse of sadism in that smile.

#levihan #levi ackerman #hange zoe #levi x hange

63 notes · View notes

navyhyuck · 4 years

Text

zero | previous | masterlist | next

𝐒𝐈𝐆𝐍𝐄𝐃, 𝐉𝐀𝐘.

↳ a love letter a week, and it has you wondering who’s your secret admirer. you have nine weeks, eight candidates, and one story to live. will you find out who your ‘jay’ is?

a/n :: hi guys it’s finally here!! this is an introduction sorta prologue type chapter here, and i, uh, apologize for the length but anyway, please enjoy and stay tuned for more! :) update :: repost because tumblr hates me

wc :: 1.6k

taglist: @childofthecycle @takoyakkun @the8luvr @staywrites

let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist!

“That’s the new kid? Shit—he’s kind of hot.”

You’re caught off guard by Ryujin’s confession, the usual slam of her locker faltering as you lean back on your heels, giving her a raised eyebrow. She’s not looking your way, however, her usually bored eyes watching an unfamiliar face stroll down the hallway; your best friend’s gaze isn’t the only one he’s getting. It wasn’t, especially eyeing him from the button-down shirt he has lazily tucked into his jeans to the clack on his dark shoes on the tiles—he had your mouth practically dropping open at the sight.

You’re absolutely sure, you realize as he walks out of sight—the only thing marking his past presence being the cling to his neck jewelry, that you’ve never seen someone walk through those halls with a fashion sense as exceptional as his. Though you’re shaken out of your trance by the girl next to you, a low chuckle leaves her as you blink back into the present.

“What’d I say?” She tests, wiggling her eyebrows in a way that makes you roll your eyes, turning towards your locker to open it. “He’s hot, right? Like not a jock sort of hot but more like a, oh! Like one of those anime guys that loves the girl but sort of wants to kill her, that kinda hot. You know?”

“...Right.”

“And he’s got a nice face too, don’t you think?” Ryujin adds slyly, a smirk spreading across her lips as you wince at her choice of words. “Plus he’s on the swim team apparently, at least from what I heard this morning. It’s kinda hard to believe it too, that you know, someone with better fashion sense than Han Jisung’s entered the school. And well, anyone other than Jisung is the one for me.” She ends off dramatically, leaning against the lockers with her eyes staring up at the ceiling as if they had the answers to the next calculus test on it.

The boy’s swim team, well, you could possibly call them the pride and joy of the school; from the way every bleacher is filled with a packed audience, they make a more entertaining group than the football team (which we don’t talk about, not ever since Lee Taeyong’s senior rebellion against the sophomore class for sabotaging the homecoming game). It would be a lie if you were to say you’d never gone to one of their many meets and watched them take every lap as if it was nothing on their shoulders—if anything, you give them the credit they deserve. Though it’s common for everyone to have a favorite from the team as well—from the current top (and most popular) seven—you never personally decided on one. If you had to pick, you’d be conflicted till your last day on the earth.

First, is Lee Minho, the captain of the swim team. It’s easy to tell why he’s a school favorite, considering the athletic drive he’s had since his days in elementary school and the contributions he’s made since his freshman year, but most importantly because of his spirit. The previous year, he single handedly took the team to the county championships with his skills in freestyle and backstroke—though he won first prize for freestyle—and earned the highest title yet. Because of that, the annual argument on the team captain had even been unofficially cancelled this year because of the coach’s final (and best) choice; no one had dared to say Minho didn’t deserve the role.

Next, is Bang Chan, the team’s best diver. You don’t know too much about swimming, the only facts being the ones you derived from watching countless meets beside your friends, but you’re certain you’ve never seen a diver better than him. The only other thing about him is that he has the hearts of everyone melting at any given time, the dimpled smiles he gives with every loss or win being the one that somehow channels energy each time. He’s also seen as the most optimistic, mainly for his cheesy cheers before meets actually start, and as the one with the most charisma.

After that, is Seo Changbin. If there’s one thing about him that the entire population comments on, it’s that resting bitch face he holds throughout the school day and practically anytime he’s not swimming. It seems like it changes completely when his skin touches the water, maybe it’s as magical as a mermaid, but it’s also how he manages to speed through 500 yards without a few pants of exhaust at the end. He’s always one to keep going, until past the breaking point.

Next, is Han Jisung, the team’s designated popular member. He’s Ryujin’s favorite (and it’s ridiculously obvious, regardless of how hard she attempts to hide it) as well as many others, clearly being yet another contributing factor to his popularity. But he’s not just popular for the sake of it, he’s also quite famous for his sleek backstroke. Being a dream it is to some to see Jisung swimming competitively in the evening on Friday, you’ve even seen some take advantage of the situation by taking snapshots. You don’t like to think what he might think of strangers taking pictures of him in a bathing suit, however.

After him, is Kim Seungmin. Maybe you could call him another school favorite, but he isn’t nearly as ‘famous’ as his counterpart, though you might be one to advocate for his backstroke over Jisung’s. He’s also known for his impeccable grades, rocketing higher than most of the students in the school and even placing him in the top 5% of the school. Not only is he a stellar athlete, but he’s got the A’s as well. (You can expect him to be a teacher’s favorite, too.)

Next, is Lee Felix, the team’s best individual medley swimmer. Out of everyone on the team, he’s known as the one and only to exhibit some of the best technique (he was even complimented on the local news, and your heart had almost stopped just seeing the pretty boy on your TV). He’s also on the dance team, the captain too, though he’s more well known for his skills in the water. You can guess that there are a handful that come to watch him dance as well.

Lastly, is Yang Jeongin. A junior, actually, but with a skill set much farther than of his age. He’s a bit cute as well, with a shy sort of persona that usually had people awing for him through his sophomore year, and it still hasn’t gotten out of your mind even after a year. He is, after all, a fantastic 200 yard racer, being able to snatch a medal at almost every meet.

Adding another swimmer to the team is common, but something tells you that the case of this boy walking through the halls of your school might make him a bit more than just another person joining the team. The aura he gave off, startling everyone in his way with nothing more than a simple walk down the hallway—it’s nothing, but it seems like much more than that. Perhaps, you’d even get to learn his name one day.

You snap out of your daydream with a smack from Ryujin, the girl nagging at you to hurry up; your hand grazes past the lock on your locker, filling in the combination before tugging violently at the metal until it gives away. Instinctively, you reach your hand in blindly for your books, but there’s a fluttering feeling on your arm as you glance back, confused. A neat envelope had fallen from above, probably having been stuffed into the top not too long ago, and a questioning hum leaves you.

“What’s this?” You say to yourself, mumbling underneath your breath as you turn it over in your hand, your finger tracing over the colorful washi tape placed on the borders. It’s decorated with stickers, all the way until your name is written in a bright blue. The last letter of your name branches off into a flower, one that leads all the way to the back, where there’s a stick over the flap that reads ‘open here’ in small font.

Might as well read it now.

dear y/n love,

i hope you’ve received this safely, and if you haven’t, i genuinely apologize! i’d say it’s not my wrongdoing, which of course it is, but you also have no clue who i am! hopefully. unless you saw me put this in your locker, but i really hope you didn’t. i’d be quite embarrassed if you did, so please just maybe, don’t tell anyone if you did? yeah, thank you in advance.

anyway, hi! i’ll call myself jay for the time being. hmm, just so i can stay anonymous! i wouldn’t want to reveal myself to you just yet. or hopefully, not at all, but i think i’ll eventually open up to the idea of confessing. oh, yeah, sorry i didn’t mention. i’m jay and i’m in love with you.

okay, that sounds pretty aggressive and a little arrogant but i promise i’m not!!! i just don’t have any extra letter paper to write on or else i wouldn’t even be writing the rest of this. okay, okay, i’m sorry. back to the main point. so, i guess you can call me your secret admirer or whatever, but anyway, i like you. like more than a friend, like you, but i’m too scared to tell you so therefore, here we are. expect to hear from me in the near future ;)

signed, jay

101 notes · View notes

calliecat93 · 3 years

Text

Callie’s Disney Princess Retrospective: Beauty and the Beast

(Snow White) (Cinderella) (Sleeping Beauty) (The Little Mermaid)

The Little Mermaid was a huge success for Disney. It was such a big success that it began the Renaissance Era of Disney Animation and returned Disney to the top animation studio. While many people such as John Musker, Ron Clements, and Glen Keane can be credited for the film's success, the biggest player by far was lyricist Howard Ashman. He put his heart and soul into the film, and not just with song lyrics. He wanted the characters to connect to the audience. He wanted to play a part in the story. He wanted this film to be something special, and he succeeded. But he was also frustrated, could be argumentative when others didn't like his vision, and unknown to everyone, he was dying. After winning two Oscars for The Little Mermaid's music, Howard revealed to composer Alan Menken that he had AIDS, and he didn't have much longer to live.

However, Ashman wasn't going down before completing one more film. Though he had been writing music for Aladdin, he ultimately ended up as the lyricist of another film. A film that had been through many different iterations and was handed off to newbie directors. Little did anyone know just how impactful this film would be for Disney, and for the industry as a whole. Well, except for Ashman himself. The film that we are discussing today is the first animated film to ever, ever be nominated for Best Feature. That film is 1991''s Beauty and the Beast.

Overview

Belle is a beautiful young woman, but is seen as an oddity in her village due to her love of books and her utter disinterest in local heartthrob Gaston. When her father, an inventor named Maurice, leaves for a science fair, he ends up taking refuge in an old, abandoned castle. But the castle is actually enchanted and acts as the home to dozens of talking inanimate objects... and a fearsome beast. When Belle goes looking for her father, she offers to take his place as the Beast’s prisoner. But during her time in the castle, Belle discovers that this Beast may not be as much of a monster as he appears, and this may lead to both discovering true love...

Review

undefined

youtube

I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that this is by far one of Disney’s most beloved films. It got praise form both critics and movie-goers when it came out, and it’s only become more beloved in the nearly 20 years since. Belle is praised as a feminist's icon and the film for it’s themes of toxic masculinity, judging a book by it’s cover, and some of the darker aspects of society like those we blindly praise. I... like the film, but I never loved it to the extent as others. Not because it’s bad, that is a ridiculous notion. I just liked other films more and Belle just didn’t interest me as others like Cinderella or Mulan or Ariel. But seeing it again as an adult who has seen the darker aspects of society since I was a kid, it REALLY rings more deeply than it did back then.

One aspect that no one can argue about is the animation. The film is beautiful. It has some of Disney’s best animators at the time such as Glen Keene, Mark Henn, Andreas Deja, and so much more. There was so much life put into the film and it is a true visual spectacle.I meant hey managed to take inaminate objects, and bring them to life. Sure they have faces to help humanize them, but to make us believe that these are talking, moving objects that were once human is still a VERY difficult task. But they have so much personality like the suave, passionate candlesick Lumiere or the stuffy, orderly Cogsworth. The backgrounds andf settings are also great fromt he Sleepy Hollow-esque village to the gothic castle of The Beast, to the creedy woods that look even more terrifying when it snows. There’s so much color and lighting that is used so well, especially with the castle eminating so much mystery and intrigue compared tot he plain village that Belle is from.

But the setting we all remember most of all is the ballroom. While Disney has been using CGI some before, such as Big Ben in The Great Mouse Detective (yes,t hat WHOLE setting was computer graphics), this is probably the biggest use to date. The ballroom is a gorgeous golden color and looks so big and vast. It takes you’re breath away. There’s a reason why this is the most well-remembered part of the film. The animaiton for this film was very straining, especially due to conditios to accomodate Ashman that we’ll get to later. It was stressful, but they absoluteley put their all into it. When you watcht he ballroom sequence, added to the dance and Angela Lansbury’s lovely vocals, you forget that you’re even watching a movie. It feels like... well, love. It’s by far one of Disney’s best looking features.

As I said in the intro, the film ultimately fell into the laps of two relatively rookie animators; Kirk Wise and Gary Trousdale. This was after several various attempts to adapt the film, with none successful. Wise and Trousdale’s biggest claim to fame at the time was doing animaiton for EPCOT’s now defunct Cranium Command attraction (look up Who Stole Buzzy, boy is THAT a story) and while they had worked on other features, they had never been in the director seats. To make it more difficult, due to Ashman’s health continuing to gradually decline, Katzenburg decided to move produciton over to New York to spare him from having to travel. Which is a VERY noble effort and it’s sweet that they were willing to do so to keep working with Ashman, but as you can imagine this was quite a strain on the production team and as before, they would sometimes clash with Ashman and his vision. Still, they along with Menken returning as composer and writer Linda Woolverton, they reworked the then-script into something that they were happy with.

The setting is very reminiscent of another Disney work, The Legend of Sleepy Hollow. One of two segments from the Package Film Era feature The Adventure of Ichabod and Mr. Toad. We all know the story of Ichabod and his infamous ride where he encountered the Headless Horseman. Here we have a similar quaint village where people seem rather simple-minded. Like in Sleepy Hollow where everyone took notice tot he rather strange looking Ichabod Crane, we see a similar notice of Belle who is an anomaly to them. Though unlike Ichabod, who had pretty much everyone under his thumb and is kind of a gold diging jerk, Belle is ostracized and is a FAR better person. Gaston bears a striking resemblance to Brom Bones in both looks and social status (tough Brom isn’t as bad in comparison or even compared to Ichabod, though still a Jerk Jock) and the Bimbettes bear a bit of similarity to Katrina. I wouldn’t be surprised if the crew used Sleepy Hollow as inspiration for setting and character design. Only thing missing is the Headless Horseman, which that would have been interesting XD

The film deals with several topics. There’s the standard ‘don’t judge a book by it’s cover’ and ‘true love conquers all’ messages. Both of which are handled very well. But there are also some that IDT Disney had ever really tackled to this point. There’s encouraging women to make their own choices, which Disney HAS tackled but this one does it differently with Belle rejecting the standard good-looking man and falling for the monstrous looking one. In fact there is really a strong theme tearing down toxic masculinity and male entitlement. It says that no, men are not obligated to a woman and that women have the freedom to reject them no matter the societal pressure. Especially if they act as despicable as Gaston. With how much more aware we’ve become of how horrible some men in power can be and how they use that power on vulnerable women, this remains a relevant message to todays audience. It let’s women be empowered, confident, and enjoy things like reading as well as have the hope of finding those who will be accepting. These are all important things, and the film does an excellent job in showing it and what actual love should be like. The Beast especially starts as a jerk, but once he decides to become better and wants to be better for no ulterior reasons, he proves worthy of Belle’s love. That’s how love should be and how a person should change themselves. Again, very well done.

Despite his health and being downcast about not completing Aladdin, Ashman still put his all into the film. As I said, they outright shifted production to another state at a time when social media and things like Skype and Zoom were a distant dream. Still, Ashman along with Menken put their all into the soundtrack, and it paid off big time. This film, along with The Little Mermaid, really set up the precedent for Broadway-style animaed films and considering that they continue to be successful, I’d say that that says a lot. There are a lot of memorable songs int his fimlm, and there’s even some that didn’t make it in. One in particular, Human Again, actualy got animated and added back for the film’s IMAX release and various home media releases (sadly it’s not in the Disney+ version). The score is also very well done, especially at the end. Just listen to the music when the Beast finally turns human again. It added to the outright magical animation will leave you in awe as much as Belle was.

But what about the vocal tracks? Good question. Let’s go over them:

Belle/Belle Reprise: Our first song which as the name suggests, is about our leading lady. It does a lovely job establishing her character as a book-loving, intelligent young woman feeling that there was be more than this life ans village that she remains stuck in. It also establishes the village’s rather simple-mindedness and socital expectatons, finding Belle a beautiful but very strange girl because of her loving reading more than getting married. It also establishes Gaston’s smugness, entitlement, and holding the entire village’s admiration, The music is optimistic, but there’s a lot here that’s gonna take a dark turn a the film goes on. The reprise is short and more somber, but let’s Belle express her unwillignness to marry a man like Gaston, wanting to find love on her own terms. Little does she know what’s awating her right after.

Gaston: No one can have a song named after Gaston like Gaston! Yeah, this inspired plenty of meme’s, didn’t it? Even Disney itself has gotten in on the fun haha! But seriously, this is a fun villain song. I gotta give Gaston this, he’s a smug, horrible person but he shows that he can back up many of his boasts. I don’t doubt that he can eat dozens of eggs a day or is as strong as an ox. The song also further shows the town’s utter blind devotion to this brute, not being concerned about his entitlement to a girl who clearly isnt interest and more because of how handsome and grand he is. Isn’t society fun kids?! But then at the end, after Maurice is kicked out, it takes a darker turn as Gaston makes his plans to essentially blackmail Belle with her father’s safety... and right back to blind praise! I feel zero sympathy for any of the villagers in this film. But yeah, a song with a lot of dark implications, but still a very enjoyable villain song.

Be Our Guest: This is a true show-stopper, and I’m not just saying that. Lumiere wanted to create a show, and BOY did he succeed. The song is the most like a Broadway number in it’s composition and grand feeling. The fact that we have a huge number full fo singing, dancing, stuntwork, etc is being done by a bunch of dishes and pretty freakin’ impressive. Yet the animators gave it all so much life and Jerry Orback sings with so much passion and energy and it is just SO much fun to watch! Especially with poor Cogsworth at first trying to get everyone to calm down, but by the end he gets real into it... well until Lumiere knocks him to the side. The only negative is that for being a song about serving Belle dinner, aside form a bit of The Grey Stuff she didn’t even eat dinner. For shame! So 1 out fo 10 of food servive, but the show was worthy of two thumbs up!

Something More: This was the song that replaced Human Again. It’s a sweet song about Belle and Beast beginning to realize their feelings the more that they spend aroudn each other. Belle sees that Beast may not be very well-mannered or much of a looker, but he does have a good heart and the more they interact, the more it begins to show. Belle’s kindness, intellience, and willingness to look beyond the surface has Beast falling in love with her, yet his fear of being a monster is still holding him back. Still as we see the two do things like have dinner, play in the snow, or even Beast letting Belle read to him, the more we see that spark of love slowly grow, even if they haven’t fully grasped it. It helps advance the romance, and it’s just really sweet.

Beauty and the Beast: The song that won Menken and Ashman another Oscar. It’s not hard to see why either. The song is beautiful. It’s performed by Angela Lansbury, and her gentle vocals accompanies by the gentle orchestra is just lovely. The woman outright did the song in one take. One take. That is insane, yet it happened. And I can see why because the song is just beautiful. It adds to much to the already majestic ballroom scene, being about two unlikely individuals finding love and ultimately making the other a better person. It’s just a work of beauty. There’s also the pop version by Celine Dion and Peabo Bryson, which I also really love. It’s more commerical, but still very pretty especially with Celine’s gorgeous singing voice. Both versions are beautiful, and the first thing I think of when I think of this film... and no, not just beause of the name.

The Mob Song: This is exactly as you would expect with a song with that title. It’s dark, angry, and scary. Gaston rallies the troops to kill The Beast, convincing them that he is a danger to them all. They grab their torches, weapons, and there’s just this tense atmosphere throughout. This is the culminaiton of al the socital expectations and blind devotion to a person who doesn’t at all deserve it. It’s also a very accurate protrayal of the mob mentality, where you become a part of this hivemind following the rest of the crowd no matter how wrong it may be and despite your own senebilities. The only ones who don’t fall into it, Belle and Maurice, get tossed into a basement for their trouble. What makes this song sad though? In Disney+’s documentary Howard, produced by Don Hahn who also produced this film, it was explained how in the eyes of several of his colleagues, it seemed like Ashman was venting about the AIDS epidemic. That was a VERY dark time where the gay community was especially under fire, persecuted, hated, and so many other horrible things because the world chose to blame them for it. Ashman was a gay man. He had an ex partner die of AIDS, and had another partner at the time who talked about him in the documentary. Imagine being scapegoated just because of your sexuality, even though you never caused any harm, and society hated on you and others fell into he mob mentality, and they went as far as to either demand you to die or do the job themselves. All because you were different. Really adds a new perspecive to the song, doesn’t it? This can be applied to so many groups too, which makes the song even scarier, but also emphasize even more how dangerous the mob mentality is. Very effective song.

undefined

youtube

Sadly, Howard wouldn’t live to see all of his numbers to completion. With his health declining rapidly, Menken and various others went back and forth between Burbank and New York in order to work with him. Ashman worked until he psycially couldn’t anymore. He was even giving notes to performers like Paige O’Hara despite barely being able to talk. He managed to complete his work, at least to my knowledge, before his passing on March 14th, 1991, just a few months before the film’s release. After a screentest, which proved very successful, Don Hahn and some other colleagues went to see Ashman in the hospital to say their goodbyes. Hahn told him of the reception, and jokingly asked who would ahve expected that the film would have turned out so great? Ashman’s response? “I did.” The work he managed to do for Aladdin would be included in the film, which we’ll discuss when we get to that one. The soundtrack won the Oscar which was awarded to Ashman (as well as Menken) posthumously and a dedication to him was including at the end of the film. It’s always sad to see such a talented individual leave us far too soon, but his work truly brought new life to Disney and is beloved even all these years later. That is a legacy that will never fade.

Now we get to characters, and we have quite a good number of them. We have of course the village that Belle is from. On the surface, they seem like pretty plain people, satisfied with their way of life. But this also causes them to at least not think highly of those who break from that way of life. The men work, the women care for the children. If men don’t work, they’re jerk slobs. They all especially fall into blind admiration for the strong, handsome Gaston who is hailed as a local hero. So much so that no one gives ANY of his terrible actions an ounce of consideraiton. Selling Maurcie tot he looney bin? Well he’s alreafy viewed as crazy, so ah well. Belle trying to tell them that The Beast isn’t a monster? While their first imprression of him is defeniteley a bad one, the fact that they listen to Gaston and not the woman who actually interacted with The Beast says a lot about how simple minded they all are. I hope they learned their lesson after all was said and done, but even if not Belle doesn’t have to pay them any mind anyways.

The only person who is accepting of Belle is her father, Maurice. He’s viewed as a crackpot, but Maurice is a good-hearted, smart, and perfectly sensible man. He’s a bit of a goof with how his inventions can go haywire, but otherwise is no diferent from any other person. But like his daughter, his interests have him judged instead of what he’s like as a person. It’s especially sad when he tries to get help to save Belle, and he is merely laughed at and thrown out because of his status. Maurice is a loving father, accepting of Belle and of her interests and choices. She isn’t interested in Gaston? Fine with him. People view her as odd? That’s utterly ridiculous. It’s really nice to have a parent who is supportive and involved int heir kids life, especally compared to Triton last time who may be caring, but is utterly against everything that matters to Ariel. In fact it’s the firs ttime we’ve had this since Snow White and Cinderlla’s parents are dead and their stepmothers are horrible, Aurora grew up away from her otherwise caring parents, and Ariel... it’s complicated. Maurice is a good guy and it is good that Belle has someone who accepts her unconditionaly. She loves him so much that she sacrificed her happiness for him twice to protect him, which really shows how strong their bond is.

That brings us to our villain, Gaston. He is a hunter who is muscular, handsome, and has physical skills that he can back up. However he is also entitled, egotistical, sefish, and just a horrible person. He wants to marry Belle only because of her beauty and instead of trying to get to know her or shifitng atteniton to any of the girls who would gladly grovel before him, he pursues her despite her not liking him. It’s especially bad when he goes to her house, sets up a huge engagement party, and gets into her personal space in his attempts to charm her. She not only rejects him, but promptly humiliates him. Yet instead of thinking that he had tried far too hard and jumped the gun, he blames Belle for daring to reject him. He reflects exactly how society can view someone like him. No one thinks about the woman, they only see a good-looking man get rejected despite us not knowing anything about ther perosn or their relaitonship. Especially if that man is essentially a celebrity, which makes people look past anyhing.

But none of these things are indicitive of an evil perosn. An arrogant jerk yes, but not evil. That all changes when, after Maurice tries to get help, Gaston comes up with a new plan. He decides to have Maurice admitted to an asylum for being crazy, and to use this to force Belle to marry him. This is what shifts Gaston from a jerk to a true villain. This is how far his entitlement and selfishness goes. He is willing to take Belle’s own elderly father and use him and his freedom as blackmail to force her to marry him. Even compared to the four villainesses before him who committed horrible acts such as attempted murder, mental/emotional abuse, and even attempting world domination, this is utterly despicable. Then there's him deciding to kill The Beast. Despite what he says, it's not because of the potential risk to the town, it's solely because he sees that Belle loves him and can't stand it. He outright calls her crazy AND locks her and Maurice up out of pure entitlement and selfishness. He doesn't give a damn about Belle or her though and well-being. Only about his own.

Gaston is entertaining, but very much evil. As I said above he bears a lot of similarity to Brom Bones from Disney's The Legend of Sleepy Hollow. A muscular jock-like figure often the most beautifiul girl in town. Only while Brom was a jerk, he was arguably less bad than Ichabod Crane depending how you looked at it. Gaston essentially has Brom's muscles an Ichabod's selfishness. He cares only for himself and his own pride. Admittedly he put up a decent fight against The Beast, but that's only because Beast wasn’t fighting back until he saw Belle. When he did, Gaston whimpered and begged like the pathetic man that he is. Then he stabbed him despite being spared out of pure spite. An act that cost him his life. Fun fact, originally he survived the fall and was truly killed via the wolves. They ended up saving that for Scar's death in The Lion King. But yeah, Gaston died in the undignifiedmanner that he deserved. A despicable but memorable villain who was perfect for this film.

Then we have the castle characters. You’d think that it would be difficult to give life to a bunch of furniture and appliances... and it probably was. But this movie makes it look easy. They do give most of them humanoid features, like eyes and a mouth, but not all of them and even then it would be so easy to make it look creepy. But the castle staff is just os much fun and beaming with personality. We’re gonna discuss the main four: Lumiere, Cogsworth, Mrs. Potts, and Chip.

Lumiere is a candlestick, which matches his passionate characterization. He’s a showman. A romantic. A more daring, out-going character compared to his frequent frenemy Cogsworth. Cogsworth is a clock and I think he’s implied to be the Beast’s butler or some other kind of advisor. He’s stuffy, nervous, and the most lawful of the characters. Though he CAN get into the fun of things with a little provoking as demonstrated in Be Our Guest and the big battle during the climax. Hoenstly, Be Our Guest is a great number to demonstrate the two’s contrasitng perosnalities. Belle has been banned from eating and Cogsworth doens’t want to both break the Beast’s orders nor cause a bunch of noise that would anger him. Lumiere however? He’s dead set on getting Belle to fall for the Beast, so she should be treated as their guest, not a prisoner. Plus he and the other staff are tired after ten years of being stuck as they are and all alone, so cue the extravagant show number. Lumiere is having the time of his life while Cogsworth tries to convince everyone to stop... but by the end gets caught up in it and joins in ont he fun. Too bad that Lumiere knocks him off the center stage at the end haha. But yeah, their constant banter is amusing but they are clealry friends, especially in the fight where Cogsworth saves Lumiere. They’re both also performed wonderfully by their VA’s, Jerry Orbach and David Odgen Stiers, the latter of whom would appear in several more Disney films, including one for this series that we’ll get to fairly soon.

Mrs. Potts is a teapot and her son Chip is a tea cup. I guess that Chip ended up that way to match his mother, which her being a teapot matches her mothelry persona. She’s very kind and consoling towards Belle and seems the most understanding about The Beast and why he acts ike he does. Which since I think that she was essentially the house caretaker, makes sense since she’d have likely been the one looking out for him. Plus she herself is a mother, and since Beast has the emotion coping skills of a child, she’d know how to deal with it. Chip is the token child character, though not a bad one. He’s a nice kid with a huge curiosity. It’s really cute how hen allt he adults are seeing the bloomign romance between Belle and Beast, he’s uttelry confused like any kid would be haha! He takes a liking to Belle quickly, though more like he sees her as if she were an older sister than any kind fo crush or the like. He’s also smart, figuring out how to use Maurice’s inveniton to free Belle and Maurice quickly...and him wanitng to do it again got a good laugh out of me haha! Mrs. Potts is a nurturing mother and her with Chip is so sweet,e specially when they’re truly human again. Plus her advice of how things will turn out alright in the end is advice that I look back on sometimes. it’s really comforitng.

So... as I’ve mentioned in these reviews, a big issue is how underdeveloped that the prince has been. The first two were plot devices only. Phillip and Eric were better int hat they were active int he plot and Eric had some more perosnality and motivation than the other three did. But it just didn’t feel like the male elads were... quite at their full potential yet. They generally didn’t recieve any character development and were mainly there for the sake of being a lov einterest to the heroine. That all changed in this film with our hero, The Beast.

Beast is one of the most well-developed male leads in a Disney Princess film. A few like Aladdin, Naveen, and Eugene rival him for overall best (though tbf the former IS the lead of his movie so that may not count) but Beast helped make the princes more equal to their princess without overshadowing her. Beast is the co-protagonist to Belle and the character that recieves the bulk of the character development. The opening tells us all that we need to know: Beast was once Prince Adam, a spoiled brat. When he turned away an elderly begger, it turned out that she was an Enchantress and she cursed him into his monsturous form. Since he looks like a monster, he subsequently acts like a monster... or more accurately, like the child that he never truly grew out of emotionally. He’s angry, lashes out constantly, and roars at the top of his lungs when at his limit. Like how a child screams and throws a tantrum when things don’t go their way because they lack the social and emotional coping skills to handle their feelings properly. Becoming a beast left Beast isolated and ashamed to face reality, and thus he didn’t learnt he proper coping skills. He accepted that he would forever be a monster, and succumb to acting like one.

That is, until the day that Belle arrived. When she offers herself to free her father, it’s the opportunity that Beast never beleived that he would get. If he can win her love before the rose petals all fall, he’ll be human again. He’ll be free. While he begins still acitng agressive and even bordeirng on emotionally abusive, e isn’t heartless. When Belle is crying about not getting to say goodbye to her father, Beast seems to legit feel bad for hurting her. It doens’t change his behavior, but it’s still a small moment that shows some humanization. It’s important to add moments like this and his despair when using the mirror to hear Belle talk about him. She’s justified in disliking him at that point, but it’s his reactions that matter. It shows his insecurity, his fear, his utter despair that he’ll be cursed for the rest of eternity. He’s already succumbed to acting the part of a monster and is already struggling to act more polite. As amusing as the scene of him yelling at Belle through the door is, it demonstrates just how hard this is for him but if he can’t improve his behavior, then he has no chance. He knows it, and views it as hopeless. It helps humanize The Beast, showing that despite his appearance there IS a human soul in there somewhere. Someone who on some level does want to be better, but he doesn’t know how. If not for these moments, Beast would have been utterly unsympathetic, but they pulled it off.

The turning point comes after Beast rescues Belle from the wolves. Remember, he’d already pretty much given up on winning Belle over and being human again and the confrontation on the third floor certainly didn’t help matters. He could have just let Belle to her own devices... but instead he went to save her. I sincerely do not believe it was because she was a prisoner or because he needed her. He had given up. He had succumbed. But he did it anyways, showing that he isn’t a bad person. It’s something that Belle sees and she gets him back to the castle to treat him. She called him out on his temper, but is sincerely grateful and Beast is stunned by this genuine act of kindness. She didn’t fear him. She wasn’t disgusted by him. She didn’t even leave him to die despite having pretty good reason to leave him and go. Belle still chose to save his life as he did her’s, showing Beast probably the first true act of love that he ever experienced in his life. We know nothing of his family and while I’m sure that staff members like Ms. Potts certainly cared for him, clearly they didn’t do much to quell his spoiled behavior. Belle was kind because she’s a kind person, and Beast finds that he wants to be kind to her in return.

From that point, we see Beast in a new light. He calms down significantly. He’s happier. He carries himself less like a wild animal and more like a person. He’s outright excited when he prepares the library to surprise Belle with. He’s still awkward as shown with his table manners and interacting with birds durign Something There, but he is trying. He’s trying for Belle. He activly enjoys her company. He sees how beautiful she is physically, but that’s not why he likes her. She’s kind, intelligent, independant, and she makes him feel in a way that he never has. He still feels that she can’t love him because of what he is, but the change that she has caused is so evident. He’s fallen in love and the ballroom scene only strengthens that with himt he happiest that he’s been all film. But the crowner that truly demonstrates htis? When Belle expresses missing her father, he lets her use the mirror. Not only does he seem legit concerned when they see Maurice freezing to death but when he sees Belle’s clear distress, he decides to let her go. He’s sad when he does so, knowing that she may very well never return. But Belle’s father needs her. he can’t force her to say and be miserable. He loves her so much that he decided to let her go. But it does mean that he gav up his final chance at being human after feeling more human than he had in ten years, and he is left in despair.

His despair is so strong that when Gaston and the mob arrives, he doesn’t even try to fight back. He just waits and is prepared to let whatever happens to him happen. Fortunately Belle coming back restores his will to live and he fights back. When Gaston grovels for his life, what does Beast do? He grants it, simply growling at him to leave. It is that moment hat shows how much of a better person that Beast is compared to Gaston. He was an angry man bordering on abusive, but he changed. He met someone who wasn’t willing to take his behavior, but was also willing to see the good that was in him. He changed for her, and it made him a kinder, more selfless person. The only thing that remains is his self-loathing, even saying that maybe him dying is for the best after Gaston has stabbed him. Fortunately Belle confesses her love, and it not only saves his life, but breaks the curse just in time. Beast is restored to Adam, having earned the right to having his humanity back. It was a lovely way to cap off his development, and allowed him to earn his happily ever after.

Beast was very much Belle’s equal. Even nowadays they’re both promoted and marketed pretty equally. One’s story would have been incomplete without the other. They gave each other what they each wanted and needed. I’ll go into specifics for Belle when I get to her below, but in the Beast’s case he needed someone kind, but also independent. Someone who wouldn’t tolerate his behavior and push him to change himself, but still kind-hearted enough to see that there is something there and be willing to help. Belle treated him in a way that no one else had. She was defiant, but also caring. She pushed him to rediscover his humanity. She got him to want to be kind. She got him to want to be a better person, and he not only treated her better but he was kinder to his staff as well. He finally grew up from the spoiled brat that he was before. He had found a reason to, and his love was so genuine that he let Belle go to be with her father again. It’s a beautiful story of growth and did enough to make Beast’s issues clear and not excusable, but sympathetic enough that we wanted him to be better and feel happy when he does so. He’s the best developed male lead in a Disney Princess film up to this point and helped pave the way for equally well done male leads. Ones not there just to fill out a plot beat and be the princesses’ reward, but to stand at her side as her equal.

Boy did THAT one get long. there’s other minor characters. Le Fou, The Bimbettes, the psyche ward keeper voiced by the late, great Tony Jay, various other castle characters, etc. all of them are entertaining, I just don’t have much to say about them. So then... we have one more to go.

Belle Analysis

https://youtu.be/M4ne1A1aNrI

Belle is one of the most praised and beloved Disney Princesses of all time. She is smart, playful, independent, and kind-hearted. I feel like she gets overly praised at times, mainly because some like to use her to bash her four predecessors since she didn’t have the goal of falling in love. I won’t repeat what I said about the four, you can read the reviews, but it’s a VERY unfair argument not just to them, but to Belle as well. She’s used as a tool to bash other female characters instead of being loved for herself. Then agains he also gets bashed for the Stolkholm Syndrome argument, which we’ll get to that aspect here soon. But for now, let’s just discuss Belle piece by piece and see where the path leads us.

Belle’s intro establishes everything right off the bat. So much so that the intro sing is literally titled Belle. She’s bookish and cheerful, but it’s clear from her interactions witht he villagers and their own gossip that she’s seen as weird. The only people who seem to like her as she is is the bookshop owner and her own father. The women are jealous of her beauty, the men only see her for her beauty, and both sides are confused at her lack of conformity. Belle lives in a town that clearly has very old-fashioned views regarding gender roles. The men work, the women get married and have babies. They all seem content with this... except for Belle. She enjoys books and adventure, musing about wanting more than the provincial life that she has. She strolls through the village with her nose stuck in a book, but has no trouble navigating at all depsite the distraction. Books provide her a source of adventure and thrill that her limited life does not. She breaks those old-fashioned norms and he village is uttelry baffled at to how she can be this way. But what truly makes her a bafflement to everyone? Her utter rejection of Gaston. While just about every other women swoons at his feet, Belle couldn’t be less impressed if she tried. She’s familiar with how he is and if she had’t recieved his advances before their first scene, she’s probably seen it enough times to know that she doesn’t like him. Him dismisisng her passion for books and insulting her father did him no favors.

On the surface, Belle does’t seem bothered by these things. But when home, she does express some hurt about ti to her father, the one perosn who loves her for her unconditionally. She knows that she doesn’t fit in. She knows that she’s not happy with her life. She wants someone to understand her besides her father. She wants more to life where she can be herself. She wants to find love on her own terms and not have to deal with the advances of men like Gaston. None of this stops her form being able to handle herself, as demonstrated when Gaston goes to her house to force a proposal. She handles kicking him out with utter grace and her “I don’t deserve you” line is icing on the cake. But none of that changes how she feels. If anything, it enforces it. The village is all on Gaston’s side and at that point, her father has left for the science fair. He won’t be there forever, hence why she wants to find someone who will love her for her. To control her own destiny. To those who feel forced into their gender roles or being forced into a relationship that they don’t want whether by an agressive person or by peer pressure, Belle’s struggle is very relatable. Her independant spirit is also admirable as while she is dismayed with where she’s at, she still is able to smile and live her life as she wants. She’ defiant. She makes do with what she has and is able to handle what’s thrown at her with pure wit and ingenuity. Gaston nor anyone else can bring her down... at least, not until her wish for adventure ends up unexpectedly granted.

Before we progress forward, let’s pause to discuss Belle’s VA, Paige O’Hara. When Beauty and the Beast was beginning casting, O’Hara was already a rising Broadway actress and Disney happened to be seeking Broadway talent specifically. After several call-backs, she finally earned the part. She’s credited Howard Ashman as a huge help in guiding her to finding her voice as Belle, and she performs the role beautifully. She captures Belle’s independence yet playfulness very well, as well as her defiance and heartbreak in certain scenes. And her singing? Beautiful. Maybe not on par with Jodi Benson, but you can tell why she was a rising Broadway star. Today, O’Hara works mainly as a painter with Belle very much being one of her main muses. Sadly due to how much her voice has aged, she rarely plays Belle herself anymore, the role nowadays being primarialy done by VA Julie Nathanson. While she also does a lovely job at the part, O’Hara will always be the first to bring the character to life. Fortunteley she still shows a lot of love for the role and has attended multiple events and even got to reprise Belle at least one more time during Ralph Breaks the Internet. She had reprised Belle multiple times between various DTV films, TV appearances, and other events. So even if she is limited nowadays, her large body of work will live on forever.

Back to the film, Belle discovers that her father is in danger and ends up at the castle. We all know what happens at this point. Belle offers to take her dad’s place, Beast agrees, and Maurice is kicked out before Belle can so much as say goodbye. She’s distraught at this, and who can blame her? In a matter of hours, her life as she knew it was ripped away from her. Now instead of her old provincial life, she’s a prisoner in an enchanted castle ruled by an angry beast. Even when given the nicer room, she doesn’t feel that much better. She’s never going to get to see her father again or even know if he’s safely back home. She has no reason to believe that a rescue is coming. Some may say that she should try and get out, but isn’t she allowed this? To be upset and at a loss of what to do? It’s not like she just cries the whole time, she calms down enough to refuse to go to dinner despite the others insisting that she does. Even when Beast yells at her to do so, she refuses. She may be a prisoner, but she’s not going to play the victim. She’s going to be as she normally is; however she wants to be.

Soon, Belle’s able to calm down enough that she decides to go explore the castle. She is ultimateley a curious, adventurous spirit. Regardless of the circumstances, she can’t help but want to learn more about this new, strange place and these new figures that she’s encountered. You can tellt hat she’s warming up reatly during Be Our Guest where despite not actually getitng to eat anything, she is just havng far too much fun to care. It gets her spirits back up and now she can’t resist exploring more. Even if it risks The Beast’s wrath, one her curiosity has peaked, she can’t resist it. It’s a great strength, but also probably her biggest flaw. Despite having been told not to and knowing by now how Beast will react, she slips away from Cogsworth and Lumiere to go explore the West Wing. This ends with her seeing the trashed area, finding the Enchanted Rose, and getting yelled at by an enraged Beast. That is the last push needed to make Belle decide to escape.

So now that we’re at this point, we have to talk about one of the big topics that comes up when discussing this film: Stockholm Syndrome. To put it simply, Stockholm Syndrome is when the victim becomes emotionally attached to their aggressor and doesn’t want to leave them and tries to justify their actions. So when the vicitm is rescued, they may react negativly or even aggressively towards the rescuers in favor of the agressor. it’s a psychological response. This is actually a case where I was able to go to a professional to ask about it,: my own mother. My mom is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and currently works as a therapist. I’m fairly sure that she’s never treated anyone with Stockholm, but it is something that she knows of. I did ask her about if the film did glorify Stockholm Syndrome as some accuse it of. The gist of what she told me is... well, there’s enough in-film that either side can use it to prove their case. After all she DOES develop positive feelings towards Beast while a prisoner, so one can take the context and use it as an example, and same for the side who don’t agree. Ultimately Belle is a ficitonal character. We can’t sit her down and give her a psychoanalysis because she’s not real, and most of us doing these analysis’ aren’t therapists, psyologists, or mental health experts anyways. I’ll leave some sources below if you’d like further reading on the topic, but doing research isn’t the same as being a professional trained to go over these kinds of things. My mom said at most, Beast can be viewed as emotionally abusive, though it is because of his own trauma and he did ultimately improve to be a better person.

I fully agree that yes, if someone wants to make the arguent that the film promotes Stockholm Syndrome, they can. It’s their opinion, this came out in a diferent time than now where we take things like emotional abuse in cinema far more seriously, and in the end it’s a piece of fiction and people are free to view it however they wish. But the same also applies to me and in my opinion, no. Belle does NOT suffer from Stockholm Syndrome nor does the film glorify it. Now I am not an expert by any stretch of the imagination. This is strictly my opinion going off my understanding of it. I may be wrong and if that’s the case, I apologize. But from what I know and understand, the case in the film is not a straight forward situation like the various case studies in the real world. Plus I think we see enough of Belle being defiant and not feeling positivly towards Beast to see that she certainly hasn’t developed any psychological attachment towards him to cope with her situation. We’ll be seeing her feelings towards him change, but I’ll explain why I don’t feel that it counts down below. But again, I’m not an expert. This is just my understanding of it.

So... why the long tangent there? Well we’re now at the wolf attack scene. The turning point in the relationship. Belle’s effort to escape ends with her cornered by a pack of vicious wolves. Fortunateley, The Beast rescues her and drives the wolves away... but he is inured in the process and passes out. As I said in Beast’s character breakdown, he didn’t have to do it at that point since he’d given up, but he did so anyways. It showed that he isn’t a bad person. Something that Belle also saw. The Beast had been aggressive and rude to her throughout, and she had every good reason to continue on her way now that the path was clear. But Belle didn’t. She got Beast onto her horse and took him back to the castle, the closest shelter, to treat his wounds. Is this because she feels compelled to do so after forming a psychological dependency or attachment to him? No. We see as she treats his wounds that she still isn’t going to tolerate his temper and rudeness towards her. She stands up for herself and talks back at him until he calms down. She very much retains her independence. So then... why did she save him? Because Belle is a good-hearted person who just saw this seemingly hateful beast save her life when he didn’t have to. She isn’t the kind of person to leave an injured person to die. She did it out of kindness and gratitude as we see when she genuinely thanks Beast for saving her life. She’s seen a new side to him now, and it’s made her reconsider her earlier stance. Thus Belle remains at the castle.

The characteristics of Stockholm Syndrome include positive feelings towards the captor and belief of goodness in the captor, no real effort in escaping, learned helplessness, and feelings of pity to the captor. You can read the list and learn more here, and the link will also be with the sources. So you’re probably looking at that and going ‘...uuuggghhhh’ at the movie right now. Which fair enough. However let’s also look at where we are now. This is the part of the film where Beast makes an honest effort to improve himself. He’s nicer, trying to be more polite, and treats Belle as a person. She’s really not a prisoner anymore at this point and while mybe theposisbility of being human again is motivating Beast, for the most part I think it’s because he genuinely grows to like Belle. As for Belle, I think that she likes the castle. It’s enchanted and full of intrigue and mystery, just like in her books. It’s the escape form that provincial life in the village that she’s been longing for. It’s a temptation that she just can’t resist. The staff all like her and treat her kindly and no one tries to force her to be something that she isn’t. Beast especially loves Belle’s love of books, even giving her the huge library to repay her earlier kindness. Belle is able to be who she is and be around those who are accepting of her. Even fi for the staff it’s for ulterior motives, IDT that they’re faking liking having her around and Beast certainly isn’t. This isn’t really a straight-forward captive or abuse situaiton that Stockholm Syndrome would apply to in my opinion, especially since Belle never once succumbs to the Beast’s terms. She only respects and acts friendly with him when he does so towards her, and they are both clearly benefiting positivly from it. We know that Beast has no malicious intenitons regarding Belle and it’s Lumiere and co. insisting on the relaitonship happening moreso, and that’s because they want their humanity back so it adds a bit of complexity. It’s just not a straight forward case where we can easily apply Stockholm Syndrome to and get an accurate reading, at least in my opinion. She certainly is FAR from helpless.

undefined

youtube

So then let’s discuss Belle’s feelings for The Beast. We know how much Belle’s influence changed The Beast. But what about Belle? She really doens’t change during the movie, nor did she realy need to. She’s already confident about herself, likes herself, and she knows what she wants with her life. Sure her curiosity can get her into trouble, but otherwise she didn’t realy need a character arc like Beast did. What Belle needed was acceptance. To find someone who would like her for who she is and not see her as weird for it. Beast doesn’t at all view her that way. He enjoys being around her because she’s smart and independant and even gets her to read to him. It’s that kind of acceptance that Belle hasn’t recieved from anyone outside her father. The more that she sees Beast try to be better, the more that she sees how sweet and endeairng that he really is and she’s more than happy to help him. I think that seeing this kinder side bloom and that acceptance and even enjoyment of her is what makes Belle fall in love with him. It’s what helps make the ballroom scene so magical. Two people considered outsiders coming together and dancing the night way happily together. It’s beautiful, magical, and the perfect culminaiton in everything prior. They brought out the best in each other. Made each other happier in a way that no one else had ever done. They’re better now because of the other, and it’s just lovely to see.

But of course, we know what comes next. While happy with Beast and being at the castle, Belle still misses her father. When she sees him in the snow and horirbly sick, she’s distressed. Seing this, Beast allows he to go. Honestly I think that Belle could have left whenever she wanted at that point and Beast wouldn’thave fought it, but she was staying willingly at that point because she was happy. But her father needed her now. If she truly had Stockholm Syndorme, I don’t think that she would have done so. But she doesn’t really give it any kind of thought here. While sad to leave The Beast, she has alreayd mad eup her mind when told that she could go. She leaves to save her father, The Beast giving her the mirror and unbeknownst to her Chip tagging along. Belle fortunateley gets Maurice home safely... and just in time for Gaston to initiate his plan to have Maurice locked away. Belle is of course shocked and outraged and in a panic, uses the mirror to confirm The Beast’s existence. Despite her insistence that he isn’t a bad person, it’s too late. Gaston realizes that she’s in love with the ‘monster’ and we get the iconic line: “He’s no monster Gaston, you are.” Beast treated her like a person and improved himself from his more toxic behavior. Gaston treated her like the prey that he seeks during his hunts, refusing to let up until he’s won. Beast had even kept his word about letting Maurcie go and returned him to the village safely, and of course let Belle go to help him and even seemed to feel guilty for what he had done previously. Gaston though? He shows no guilt over trying to use Maurice to blackmail Belle. He continues his horrible behavior not only by forming the mob, but locking Belle and Maurice in their own cellar for simply speaking against it. Belle didn’t call Gaston a monster because she’s been conditioned or due to a coping reflex. It’s because Gaston is a genuinely despicable person while Beast grew to become a good person. She saw this and stood her ground as she always has, but this time at the point where she won’t tolerate it anymore. Which if it was your parent being shipped off to the insane asylum by some jerk just because they want to marry you, woudln’t you call them a monster in comparison?

So we reach the climax. Belle and Maurice arrive after Chip frees them with Belle rushing to get to Beast. She makes it and seeing her reignites Beast’s will to live... but he’s stabbed by Gaston. Belle saves Beast from falling over the roof, but there’s nothing that she can do to stop him from dying. She’s devestated, blaming herself for it. Beast’s final words to her are that at least he got to see Belle one last time, and if she hadn’t figured it out before, I think that this was when Belle realized that Beast loved her... and that she loved him. We knew that Beast certianly loved her but we needed it confirmed from Belle as the curse was still intact. As Beast lay motionless, Belle cries and at last confesses that yes, she does love him... just as the last rose petal falls. With that confession, the curse breaks and Beast is ressurected/becomes human again. Belle is shocked as she sees not The Beast standing before her, but Prince Adam. You can tell how confused she is. is this reallyt he same person that she loved? Adam confirms it and Belle looks into his eyes... and that’s all it takes for her to finally smile. yes, it is the same man that she had fallen in love with. They kiss,a nd the curse is truly broken. Everyone becomes human again,t he castle is restored to it’s original state, and Belle and Adam dance happily, free to live happily ever after.

Belle is a role model character. She’s there for girls to look up to, and I think that the amount of fans that she has proves that she succeeded. She encourages girls to be themselves. To be independant and not bend to social norms or pressure. To find love for themselves and not succumb tot he pressure of unwanted admirers or the pressure to marry them. Something that happens far too much in reality. She doesn’t change, but there was no reason for her to. As I said, Belle’s not one of my favorites. Not because I dislike her by any means. if anythign I like her much more now as an adult now that I have a stronger understanding of the film. I just have princesses that I like more, and that’s really it. I also don’t like how some insist that she’s the best Dsney Princess compared to her predecessors because as I hope I made clear in those reviews, the previous four pricnesses are NOT badly done. If anything, I think it’s more anti-femenist to use a woman to bash other women without just cause. Saying that belle is better because she didn’t fall in love witht he guy at first sight or didn’t sell her soul for a guy without caring to analyze those characters isn’t empowering, it’s saying that if you don’t act a certain way as a woman, you’re anti-feminist. Which is a terrible stance. No woman is the same and women shouldn’t be used against women in this kind of way. Regardless, that’s an issue with certain ‘critics’, not Belle herself. She’s a great character and someone that I can admire. Maybe not as much as others, but I can certainly see why she’s left such an impact on so many and not even just little girls. To many people of all kinds. Who could be upset about that?

Final Thoughts

Beauty and the Beast is a lovely film. Is it my favorite? No. I didn’t watch it all that much as a kid. As an adult I have a greater appreciation for it. It’s beautfully animated, it’s themes are well-protrayed and still relevant, the characters are memorable and fun, and it’s music is phenomenal. I can absoluteley see why this as the first animated film to ever be niminated for Best Picture. It’s a tragedy that it lost, but it still proved that animation very much had staying power as Walt proved all those years ago. And of course the film is the final testament of Howard Ashman. He may not have been part of the Disney Renaissance for long, but his contributions single-handedly changed the company and their films for the better. Even today this style of musical films is very much going strong even over 30 years since it began with The Little Mermaid. We lost Ashman far too soon, and who knows what amaizng things he could have one if he were still alive. We can never know the what ifs, but we can always appreciate what came during his lifetime. He, Kirk Wise, Gary Trousdale, Alan Menken, Don Hahn, various animators, and so many more did so much to bring this film to life, and it will forever stand as a true Disney Masterpiece.

The film was a giant success, and Disney wasn’t slowing down one bit. The very next year, another animated feature would come out. A film about a dashing street rat who found a magic lamp and unleashed a magical genie who would make all his dreams come true. But wait you may ask, isn’t this a Disney Princess retrospective? Yep. So why am I talking about a dashing hero? Well there is a princess in it, but she occupies a bit of a unique place in the line-up. She is the first and so far only Princess to not be the main charater in her film. But she still left a huge impact and i included in the main lineup so we are NOT leaving her out. So next time, come along as we enter a whole new world to discuss 1992’s Aladdin, and in particular Princess Jasmine.

Image Source: Animation Screencaps

Further Reading on Stockholm Syndrome: Healthline, Medical News Today, GoodTherapy, WebMD,

#callie reviews #disney princess reviews #beauty and the beast

15 notes · View notes

ericsonclan · 3 years

Text

It’s Saturday

Summary: Clementine and Violet open up to each other about their pasts and come up with a new idea to make Ericson feel more like home.

Word Count: 3789

Read on AO3:

Clementine looked out from her perch on the watchtower. It had taken a lot of convincing to get Louis to stop freaking out at the thought of her up there. But after some words, many promises and an elaborate talk about the prosthetic with Willy, the others had let her go up to take a shift on lookout duty. Clementine’s gaze moved out past the walls and studied the few walkers roaming the area. One was currently trying to reach for something in a hole of a large tree. Leaves and animal dropping were all that the walker found though. Another was busy running into different trees and rocks repeatedly while one further away was simply staring up blankly at the sky.

Clementine took a deep breath, a small smile appearing on her lips. It was nice to finally have a different chore to do around Ericson. Though she did wish that the prosthetic wouldn’t bother her leg so much. She’d have to talk about that with Willy. Clementine felt bad whenever she added to the young teen’s list of things to work on but Willy always smiled and promised her that he would make the next prototype even better than the last one. She wouldn’t bother him about it till later though. For now she wanted to enjoy this newfound freedom of being on lookout duty. Clementine was suddenly pulled out her thoughts, however, when she heard the creaking of the rickety ladder. Turning around she saw the top of Violet’s head as she blindly climbed up the ladder.

“Violet, grab my hand,” Clementine moved forward and held out her hand. The blonde glanced up and squinted due to the harsh sunlight before grasping out towards where she assumed Clementine’s hand to be. With a small grunt Clementine lifted up her friend the rest of the way.

“Thanks,” Violet muttered and walked forward, her hand brushing against the few wooden boards that covered the watchtower’s side.

“What are you doing up here?’ Clementine looked towards her friend who had finally found a spot she felt secure on.

Violet glanced up then out beyond the walls. “Thought I’d join in. People won’t be as pissy at me if both of us are on the watchtower,” Violet crossed her arms and leaned against the wooden boards. She remained silent for a few seconds, her eyes searching out towards the outside world. “I just wanted a break too.”

Clementine understood where Violet was coming from. Life could get monotonous at points, especially when you were one of the two who were adjusting to permanent injuries. Injuries that made people hover over you and that limited what you could and couldn’t do within Ericson’s walls.

“Okay, but you won’t be getting a break from the worried looks,” Clementine crossed her arms as well and looked back at the courtyard. Violet studied Clementine for a moment and tried her best to follow her gaze. She noticed that Clementine was staring at Louis who was busy carrying some firewood for Omar. His dreadlocks bounced a little with his movement as he tried to sneakily look over to check on Clementine. The worry was clear in his eyes when he glanced up her way, only growing stronger when he noticed Violet up there too. He was so distracted by this that he didn’t pay attention to where he was heading and quickly ran into the side of one of the picnic tables. Louis yelped in pain and dropped a few pieces of firewood.

“Are you okay, Louis?” Clementine called out to her boyfriend who gave a thumbs up.

“Who, me? Yeah, I’m totally fine. Just doing my part around Ericson in style,” He gave a playful smile over towards his girlfriend and leaned aesthetically against the picnic table. Clementine laughed softly at Louis while Violet rolled her eyes. It didn’t matter that she couldn't’ see clearly - she knew the two of them well enough to know what was happening.

“Are you sure it's safe for you two up there?” Louis asked while he placed down the firewood and rubbed his hip.

“We’re fine, Lou. Just be careful not to run into any more tables,” Clementine’s words seemed to do little to calm down the concern in Louis’ eyes but he nodded regardless.

“If you need anything, either of you, just shout and I’ll be there,” Louis waved to the pair then picked up the firewood and walked over to where Omar was setting up the fire pit. Clementine and Violet watched him for a minute before they returned their sights to the outside world. Neither of them talked for a little while. Both of them were enjoying the peaceful silence and the small freedom they had gained.

“It's nice that we can finally do this,” Clementine’s voice made Violet look over her way. She gave a small smile then gazed out towards the woods once more. Something about the sight of the green and brown blurs along with the slowly moving greyish ones was comforting to Violet. Maybe due to the fact that she rarely saw anything outside of what was inside Ericson’s walls.

“Yeah, it took fucking forever but it is nice,” Violet’s smile soon faded and her eyes turned sadder. Her mind slowly turned back to the events of that night. A night that had taken so much from her and the others.

Clementine could feel the mood shift and studied her friend for a minute.

Violet hunched over and stared off into the distance as her eyes continued to get lost in their emotions. “Jesus. Everything is so different now. Me,” Violet glanced over at Clementine and down at her prosthetic. “Us, the school.” She took a shaky breath and turned around to look at the courtyard. Her eyes focused on the flagpole where the black Death Murder t-shirt flew lazily in the wind. “I remember how Marlon described it, what we were gonna turn Ericson into. It’s not the way any of us pictured it.” Violet’s eyes wandered around the courtyard, trying to pick up on all the different tasks that were being done.

Clementine moved closer to her friend and stood beside her. “How did you picture it?”

Her words broke Violet’s focus away from the courtyard and back to her. She gave a small shrug and sighed as she looked at the floorboards of the watchtower. “I guess I couldn’t. I just listened to what Marlon said. How it would be a home, a real one. But I couldn’t wrap my head around it.” Violet’s eyes held a deep sadness to them as her eyebrows knit together.

She never really knew what a home was to begin with. Not with the one she had when she grew up. Violet was silent for a few moments before she spoke up again. “My family lived in a trailer.” Her pale eyes wandered over to Clementine’s golden brown ones. Curiosity flickered in Violet’s eyes. “What about you? Where’d you live?”

Clementine leaned against the wall and looked up at the sky. “I lived in a house with my mom and dad. Fence around it. Big backyard.” She smiled nostalgically at the fond memories. Her eyes looked back at Violet and noticed the soft smile on her lips. She seemed genuinely happy at Clementine’s nostalgia.

“What was your favorite part of the house?”

Violet's question surprised Clementine for a second. She thought deeply about her response. “The kitchen.”

Violet looked surprised by the answer. Her eyes danced with confusion and curiosity at the choice. “Really? Why?”

“On Saturdays my dad got up early to make us all pancakes. I’d come downstairs and run to the kitchen so I could help.” Clementine smiled warmly at the memories. “Seeing my mom’s face when she took a seat at the table, all laid out with pancakes, syrup and orange juice...” Clementine’s smile faltered for a moment, sorrow overtaking her eyes as she looked off into the middle distance. “She was so happy. We all were.” Her voice wavered slightly and she took a moment before looking at her friend once more. “Y’know, Ericson can still be the home Marlon promised. It’s taking some time but we are starting to rebuild.” Clementine’s words struck a chord within Violet whose eyes grew large before softening. She let out a sigh then locked eyes with Clementine.

“It’s a lot of work but I know it will be worth it,” Violet’s faint smile grew when she saw the joy on her friend’s face. She leaned back further and looked over at the steam that was rising up from the pot Omar was stirring. “The kitchen’s a mess, but we could find some old pans and start a Saturday pancakes routine.”

“Sounds great, but I’m not sure when Saturday is,” Clementine smiled playfully at her friend. Ever since the world ended calendars had become non-existent.

Violet laughed softly, a gentle smile resting on her lips. “How about this: it’s whenever we want pancakes. When we’re having a bad day or life is being too shitty, we’ll make it Saturday and start cooking pancakes.”

Violet’s suggestion made Clementine smile grow and her eyes danced with excitement. “Perfect. It will be our pancake pact.” Clementine held out her hand and Violet grabbed it, shaking it firmly. The two shared a smile.

“So, how soon do you think we’ll declare it to be Saturday?” Clementine asked with a playful grin.

“I don’t know. Life can turn to shit pretty quickly. I give it four days.” Violet answered and kicked off the wall to turn and look past the walls again.

“That’s generous of you. I thought you would say a day or two,” Clementine’s gaze looked out past the walls and at the walkers once more.

“What can I say, I guess I’ve become more optimistic,” Violet smiled and the two continued to watch the world in silence, both of them happy with this new pact they had made.

Violet felt like shit. She hadn’t been able to sleep at all last night due to the same nightmares that always plagued her mind. It didn’t help that for some reason the skin around her eyes was beginning to irritate her too. Ruby said she would make some more ointment to help with irritation but until then she would just have to deal with it. Slowly Violet walked through the halls of Ericson, ready to face yet another boring day of chores. Knowing the group they wouldn’t let her do anything remotely dangerous still and so she would be spending the day picking herbs and cutting vegetables or maybe making rabbit pelts. The blonde grumbled and grumpily pushed open the doors to the courtyard. Her eyes were focused on the ground as she kicked a pebble.

“Damn it all!” Prisha’s angry voice made Violet look up to see her girlfriend angrily hunched over a contraption and scattered notes. Prisha pushed back a few wisps of hair before she began to look over her notes again. She lifted up her right hand and tried to fix the contraption but it seemed impossible with just one working hand. Prisha huffed and swung her body, causing her non-working arm to sway out into the air before whacking against her side. She groaned and let her head fall onto the table.

Violet redirected her path and walked over towards Prisha. She silently sat down beside her and looked at her for a moment. “Shitty day?”

Violet’s voice made Prisha turn her head and look up at her love with sad eyes. “Yes, it just feels like nothing I do today works out,” Prisha gave a tired sigh.

Violet thought for a moment and leaned over, kissing Prisha’s face. The blonde then noticed that Willy had come over to check on Prisha. Violet knew that Prisha was too wound up to focus. She wasn’t doing much better herself. So Violet made a decision and took a deep breath. “It’s Saturday!”

Willy let out an excited gasp and scampered off. He spotted Garbage who was staring off blankly into the distance and munching on some crunchy leaves. The lanky teen picked up the possum and spun her around. “Garbage, it’s Saturday!” Willy laughed as the possum hissed, annoyed by the interruption.

“Holy shit, it’s Saturday?!?!” Louis had just come back from hunting with Clementine, their hands swayed lazily as they walked forward. He beamed over at his girlfriend who looked just as excited as he did.

“It hasn’t been Saturday for a while. I’ll go help Ruby with the ingredients. Can you help with the pans?” Clementine looked over at Louis who smiled widely.

“Leave it to me, my darling!” Louis’ eyes grew wide when Clementine kissed his cheek softly. She gave his hand a quick squeeze then went off to find Ruby.

Prisha watched in confusion. She had no idea why everyone was freaking out about a certain day of the week. Willy had spotted AJ and was excitedly telling him the news. His hands and arms swung around animatedly as he spoke. AJ’s eyes grew large and sparkled with joy.

“It’s Saturday!” AJ did an excited little dance and quickly ran off with Willy who mentioned the oil press and acorn grinder for some reason. Garbage bounced on top of Willy’s head, hissing wildy as the pair ran off laughing and high fiving.

“I’m confused.” Prisha spoke up and looked over at her girlfriend who also seemed ecstatic about this for some reason. “What’s so special about Saturdays?”

“A long time ago, Clem and I made this pact. Whenever someone was having a really shitty day or life was being way too much of an asshole they could declare that it's Saturday. Once they did, everyone knew that it was code for pancakes and we would use pancakes to make the day less shitty,” Violet smiled brightly.

Prisha was surprised by this news. She never could tell what secrets she would discover about her new home. Ericson seemed to be a treasure trove of secrets and hidden joys that those living here had worked hard to obtain and hold onto.

“I heard it’s Saturday,” Omar smiled warmly over at the couple as he fed the fire some more logs to reignite the flames.

“Yeah, it will be Prisha’s first Saturday too,” Violet gently took her love’s hand and smiled.

“Actually, it’s not Saturday.” Aasim spoke up as walked forward with a mason jar full of honey. “According to my internal calendar, it should be Tuesday.”

Violet frowned at Aasim and his know-it all-attitude. Suddenly Ruby appeared and intertwined her fingers with Aasim before tenderly kissing his cheek.

“Pookie, stop being a stick in the mud and enjoy the pancakes.” Ruby’s words seemed to soften Aasim’s expression.

“Yeah, take that stick out of your ass and have fun,” Violet crossed her arms. Aasim was about to speak up when Louis appeared from the admin building with two busted up pans.

“People, people, please. Let us not fight on this cherished pancake day!” He smiled as he walked forward and handed over the pans to Omar. “We wouldn't want to ruin Prisha’s first experience of these end of the world delicacies.” Louis pulled on the sides of his coat with a warm expression.

“Ruby!” Clementine called out. “I need help with Milky Way!”

“I’ll be there in two shakes of a lamb’s tail!” Ruby yelled back at her friend before stealing another kiss from Aasim and bustling off.

“Is there any way I can help?” Prisha offered as Willy and AJ scampered forward with the oil press and acorn grinder.

“Prisha! Prisha! You gotta help with the acorns! It’s the best part!” Willy lifted up a bag of acorns and shook it around. “Alright,” Prisha got up and joined the two youngest members of Ericson. WIlly and AJ took turns animatedly displaying how to use the acorn grinder. Prisha nodded and smiled, listening thoughtfully even though she had used it before in the past.

Once the explanation was done she placed her hand on the crank. With a deep breath, Prisha began to grind the acorns while AJ and Willy excitedly cheered her on. Omar laughed and grabbed a bowl to take the dry ingredients they were making. Meanwhile Louis and Violet were arguing about how the oil press even worked. Louis tried to figure it out but just ended pinching his pinky. While he was blowing on his pinky and rubbing it Violet began to try her best at getting the oil press to work.

“You got this, Vi! Show that oil press who’s boss!” Louis cheered for his friend who wasn’t doing the best job showing the oil press who’s boss. By the time they had figured it out, Ruby and Clementine were back with the goat milk. Prisha let out a shaky breath and used her right hand to wipe off some sweat. She had gotten so caught up in the boys’ cheering that she had used up a lot of strength to make the acorn flour.

“That was so cool !” Willy exclaimed. His words made Prisha’s heart warm and she lifted up a hand, ruffling his hair fondly.

“Thanks. I suppose we’ll have to wait until next time to see if you can beat me, Squirt.” Prisha had a competitive expression on her face.

Willy’s eyes shone with the same competitiveness. “I totally can! Just wait until next Saturday!”

Willy and Prisha shared a smile before looking over to see AJ helping out Louis and Violet with the oil press. The youngest of the three was somehow the best at the device and both Violet and Louis watched in awe as AJ helped make oil. Both of them ruffled his hair and praised his skills once he had finished up.

Omar and Aasim worked together to mix the wet ingredients of honey and goat milk with the dry while Clementine went over with Ruby to place the pans on the low flames of the fire pit. Both of them were happily talking about the anticipation of pancakes.

Soon the batter was complete and the group took turns cooking pancakes. Clementine and Louis giggled and laughed as they hovered over their pan. Louis continued to give Clementine’s cheeks tons of kisses as her eyes focused on making the best pancakes. Prisha glanced over their way before she heard the sizzle of the pan as Violet placed down some batter.

“Y’know our first few pancake days were pretty bad. Our pancakes were all chalky and tasted like dirt.” Violet had a small smile on her face.

“Those pancakes were good though!” Willy jumped in as he helped set the picnic table with Ruby and Aasim.

“They were god awful,” Ruby corrected him. “Thank the Lord we have Milky Way and Comet now.”

“It also helps that we have the oil press and acorn grinder up to the standard we need them now.” Aasim added with a smile.

“The pancakes are really good now,” Omar added as he nodded towards the pan.

Prisha’s eyes followed his gaze and she swore under her breath. Her pancakes had nearly burned.

Soon Prisha and Violet’s turn was done and so was Clementine and Louis’. Ruby and Omar took a turn at one of the pans, the pair working in perfect harmony as they discussed what type of tea they would pair with the pancakes. Both of them spoke happily and ended up making the best pancakes out of the group. Willy and AJ on the other hand had made the worst. They were lumpy, off-looking and somehow ended up both undercooked and burnt at the same time. Neither of them seemed to mind though as they high fived and beamed proudly at their pancakes.

After a while everyone was at the picnic table eating happily. Willy continually snuck bites of pancake to Rosie who seemed ecstatic for pancake day. Her stubby tail wagged joyfully as she moseyed around getting more treats from Louis and Clementine alike. Ruby was busy feeding Aasim a bite of her pancakes while Violet judged them silently for it. Everyone laughed and smiled until they saw that Prisha was taking her first bite of her pancakes. Her eyes lit up as she chewed the food and a joyful smile pulled on the corners of her lips.

“Woooo! Pancakes were a success!” Willy crowed happily and tossed over a piece of pancake to Garbage. The possum sniffed it suspiciously before licking up the pancake crumb. Her beady black eyes sparkled as she hissed happily.

“I’m glad,” Violet smiled over at her love then continued to eat. Everyone congratulated themselves on a job well done.

“Here’s to the first of many more Saturdays with Prisha!” Louis held up his cracked mug that held his tea. The others all cheered with him.

“So, I’m curious why this is attached to Saturdays,” Prisha spoke up and the group looked over at her.

“It was an old family tradition of mine.” Clementine leaned forward and looked at her friend. “One that I really loved. So it’s really nice to share it with my new family.”

Prisha felt her heart grow warm at those words. To find a group like this one that treated her not only as an equal but as family was something she never expected to gain.

“There is nothing like the joys of pancakes and family,” Louis kissed Clementine’s hand softly.

“Clem used to always talk about pancakes before we came to Ericson,” AJ spoke up.

“Goofball over here used to think I was talking about some secret weapon,” Clementine teased and some members of the table laughed as AJ frowned.

“It made sense to me,” AJ huffed and munched on his pancakes. Ruby gave his hair a quick ruffle and smiled which seemed to brighten up his mood. Everyone quickly went back to talking happily as they enjoyed the pancakes.

Soon the food was consumed and Aasim and Ruby helped Omar with the dishes. Prisha watched them for a moment when suddenly she felt something warm wrap around her hand. Looking down she saw that it was Violet’s hand. She glanced up and noticed the calm, gentle expression on her girlfriend’s face.

“I hope that helped make your day less shitty,”

Violet’s words made Prisha smile softly. She lifted up Violet’s hand and pressed a few gentle kisses to it. “It did, thank you.”

“I’m glad,” Violet smiled at Prisha before looking up at the sky. It had made her day feel better too. Her eyes soon wandered around the courtyard and took in the positive energy that the others were radiating. Saturdays always made life a little bit better.

12 notes · View notes