#the engineer's spy: thread
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"Don't spy on a privacy lab" (and other career advice for university provosts)
This is a wild and hopeful story: grad students at Northeastern successfully pushed back against invasive digital surveillance in their workplace, through solidarity, fearlessness, and the bright light of publicity. It’s a tale of hand-to-hand, victorious combat with the “shitty technology adoption curve.”
What’s the “shitty tech adoption curve?” It’s the process by which oppressive technologies are normalized and spread. If you want to do something awful with tech — say, spy on people with a camera 24/7 — you need to start with the people who have the least social capital, the people whose objections are easily silenced or overridden.
That’s why all our worst technologies are first imposed on refugees -> prisoners -> kids -> mental patients -> poor people, etc. Then, these technologies climb the privilege gradient: blue collar workers -> white collar workers -> everyone. Following this pathway lets shitty tech peddlers knock the rough edges off their wares, inuring us all to their shock and offense.
https://pluralistic.net/2022/08/21/great-taylors-ghost/#solidarity-or-bust
20 years ago, if you ate dinner under the unblinking eye of a CCTV, it was because you were housed in a supermax prison. Today, it’s because you were unwise enough to pay hundreds or thousands of dollars for “home automation” from Google, Apple, Amazon or another “luxury surveillance” vendor.
Northeastern’s Interdisciplinary Science and Engineering Complex (ISEC) is home to the “Cybersecurity and Privacy Institute,” where grad students study the harms of surveillance and the means by which they may be reversed. If there’s one group of people who are prepared to stand athwart the shitty tech adoption curve, it is the CPI grad students.
Which makes it genuinely baffling that Northeastern’s Senior Vice Provost for Research decided to install under-desk heat sensors throughout ISEC, overnight, without notice or consultation. The provost signed the paperwork that brought the privacy institute into being.
Students throughout ISEC were alarmed by this move, but especially students on the sixth floor, home to the Privacy Institute. When they demanded an explanation, they were told that the university was conducting a study on “desk usage.” This rang hollow: students at the Privacy Institute have assigned desks, and they badge into each room when they enter it.
As Privacy Institute PhD candidate Max von Hippel wrote, “Reader, we have assigned desks, and we use a key-card to get into the room, so, they already know how and when we use our desks.”
https://twitter.com/maxvonhippel/status/1578048837746204672
So why was the university suddenly so interested in gathering fine-grained data on desk usage? I asked von Hippel and he told me: “They are proposing that grad students share desks, taking turns with a scheduling web-app, so administrators can take over some of the space currently used by grad students. Because as you know, research always works best when you have to schedule your thinking time.”
That’s von Hippel’s theory, and I’m going to go with it, because the provost didn’t offer a better one in the flurry of memos and “listening sessions” that took place after the ISEC students arrived at work one morning to discover sensors under their desks.
This is documented in often hilarious detail in von Hippel’s thread on the scandal, in which the university administrators commit a series of unforced errors and the grad students run circles around them, in a comedy of errors straight out of “Animal House.”
https://twitter.com/maxvonhippel/status/1578048652215431168
After the sensors were discovered, the students wrote to the administrators demanding their removal, on the grounds that there was no scientific purpose for them, that they intimidated students, that they were unnecessary, and that the university had failed to follow its own rules and ask the Institutional Review Board (IRB) to review the move as a human-subjects experiment.
The letter was delivered to the provost, who offered “an impromptu listening session” in which he alienated students by saying that if they trusted the university to “give” them a degree, they should trust it to surveil them. The students bristled at this characterization, noting that students deliver research (and grant money) to “make it tick.”
[Image ID: Sensors arrayed around a kitchen table at ISEC]
The students, believing the provost was not taking them seriously, unilaterally removed all the sensors, and stuck them to their kitchen table, annotating and decorating them with Sharpie. This prompted a second, scheduled “listening session” with the provost, but this session, while open to all students, was only announced to their professors (“Beware of the leopard”).
The students got wind of this, printed up fliers and made sure everyone knew about it. The meeting was packed. The provost explained to students that he didn’t need IRB approval for his sensors because they weren’t “monitoring people.” A student countered, what was being monitored, “if not people?” The provost replied that he was monitoring “heat sources.”
https://github.com/maxvonhippel/isec-sensors-scandal/blob/main/Oct_6_2022_Luzzi_town_hall.pdf
Remember, these are grad students. They asked the obvious question: which heat sources are under desks, if not humans (von Hippel: “rats or kangaroos?”). The provost fumbled for a while (“a service animal or something”) before admitting, “I guess, yeah, it’s a human.”
Having yielded the point, the provost pivoted, insisting that there was no privacy interest in the data, because “no individual data goes back to the server.” But these aren’t just grad students — they’re grad students who specialize in digital privacy. Few people on earth are better equipped to understand re-identification and de-aggregation attacks.
[Image ID: A window with a phrase written in marker, ‘We are not doing science here’ -Luzzi.]
A student told the provost, “This doesn’t matter. You are monitoring us, and collecting data for science.” The provost shot back, “we are not doing science here.” This ill-considered remark turned into an on-campus meme. I’m sure it was just blurted in the heat of the moment, but wow, was that the wrong thing to tell a bunch of angry scientists.
From the transcript, it’s clear that this is where the provost lost the crowd. He accused the students of “feeling emotion” and explaining that the data would be used for “different kinds of research. We want to see how students move around the lab.”
Now, as it happens, ISEC has an IoT lab where they take these kinds of measurements. When they do those experiments, students are required to go through IRB, get informed consent, all the stuff that the provost had bypassed. When this is pointed out, the provost says that they had been given an IRB waiver by the university’s Human Research Protection Program (HRPP).
Now a prof gets in on the action, asking, pointedly: “Is the only reason it doesn’t fall under IRB is that the data will not be published?” A student followed up by asking how the university could justify blowing $50,000 on surveillance gear when that money would have paid for a whole grad student stipend with money left over.
The provost’s answers veer into the surreal here. He points out that if he had to hire someone to monitor the students’ use of their desks, it would cost more than $50k, implying that the bill for the sensors represents a cost-savings. A student replies with the obvious rejoinder — just don’t monitor desk usage, then.
Finally, the provost started to hint at the underlying rationale for the sensors, discussing the cost of the facility to the university and dangling the possibility of improving utilization of “research assets.” A student replies, “If you want to understand how research is done, don’t piss off everyone in this building.”
Now that they have at least a vague explanation for what research question the provost is trying to answer, the students tear into his study design, explaining why he won’t learn what he’s hoping to learn. It’s really quite a good experimental design critique — these are good students! Within a few volleys, they’re pointing out how these sensors could be used to stalk researchers and put them in physical danger.
The provost turns the session over to an outside expert via a buggy Zoom connection that didn’t work. Finally, a student asks whether it’s possible that this meeting could lead to them having a desk without a sensor under it. The provost points out that their desk currently doesn’t have a sensor (remember, the students ripped them out). The student says, “I assume you’ll put one back.”
[Image ID: A ‘public art piece’ in the ISEC lobby — a table covered in sensors spelling out ‘NO!,’ surrounded by Sharpie annotations decrying the program.]
They run out of time and the meeting breaks up. Following this, the students arrange the sensors into a “public art piece” in the lobby — a table covered in sensors spelling out “NO!,” surrounded by Sharpie annotations decrying the program.
Meanwhile, students are still furious. It’s not just that the sensors are invasive, nor that they are scientifically incoherent, nor that they cost more than a year’s salary — they also emit lots of RF noise that interferes with the students’ own research. The discussion spills onto Reddit:
https://www.reddit.com/r/NEU/comments/xx7d7p/northeastern_graduate_students_privacy_is_being/
Yesterday, the provost capitulated, circulating a memo saying they would pull “all the desk occupancy sensors from the building,” due to “concerns voiced by a population of graduate students.”
https://twitter.com/maxvonhippel/status/1578101964960776192
The shitty technology adoption curve is relentless, but you can’t skip a step! Jumping straight to grad students (in a privacy lab) without first normalizing them by sticking them on the desks of poor kids in underfunded schools (perhaps after first laying off a computer science teacher to free up the budget!) was a huge tactical error.
A more tactically sound version of this is currently unfolding at CMU Computer Science, where grad students have found their offices bugged with sensors that detect movement and collect sound:
https://twitter.com/davidthewid/status/1387909329710366721
The CMU administration has wisely blamed the presence of these devices on the need to discipline low-waged cleaning staff by checking whether they’re really vacuuming the offices.
https://twitter.com/davidthewid/status/1387426812972646403
While it’s easier to put cleaners under digital surveillance than computer scientists, trying to do both at once is definitely a boss-level challenge. You might run into a scholar like David Gray Widder, who, observing that “this seems like algorithmic management of lowly paid employees to me,” unplugged the sensor in his office.
https://twitter.com/davidthewid/status/1387909329710366721
This is the kind of full-stack Luddism this present moment needs. These researchers aren’t opposed to sensors — they’re challenging the social relations of sensors, who gets sensed and who does the sensing.
https://locusmag.com/2022/01/cory-doctorow-science-fiction-is-a-luddite-literature/
[Image ID: A flier inviting ISEC grad students to attend an unadvertised 'listening session' with the vice-provost. It is surmounted with a sensor that has been removed from beneath a desk and annotated in Sharpie to read: 'If found by David Luzzi suck it.']
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Hi Neil! We were talking about Puck of Pook's Hill in one of my seminars, and we were wondering if your Puck in The Sandman was inspired by that book?
Yes and no. Puck of Pook's Hill is hugely influential on me and the way I think about the land and Sussex, and I'm sure it was an influence on Sandman #19.
But my wild Puck is closer to the Robin Goodfellow of the ballad:
From Oberon, in fairy land,
The king of ghosts and shadows there,
Mad Robin I, at his command,
Am sent to view the night-sports here.
What revel rout
Is kept about,
In every corner where I go,
I will o'ersee,
And merry be,
And make good sport, with ho, ho, ho
More swift than lightning can I fly
About this airy welkin soon,
And, in a minute's space, descry
Each thing that's done below the moon.
There's not a hag
Or ghost shall wag,
Or cry, 'ware goblins! where I go;
But Robin I
Their feats will spy,
And send them home with ho, ho, ho!
Whene'er such wanderers I meet,
As from their night-sports they trudge home,
With counterfeiting voice I greet,
And call them on with me to roam:
Through woods, through lakes;
Through bogs, through brakes;
Or else, unseen, with them I go,
All in the nick,
To play some trick,
And frolic it, with ho, ho, ho!
Sometimes I meet them like a man,
Sometimes an ox, sometimes a hound;
And to a horse I turn me can,
To trip and trot about them round.
But if to ride
My back they stride,
More swift than wind away I go,
O'er hedge and lands,
Through pools and ponds,
I hurry, laughing, ho, ho, ho!
When lads and lasses merry be,
With possets and with junkets fine;
Unseen of all the company,
I eat their cakes and sip their wine!
And, to make sport,
I puff and snort:
And out the candles I do blow:
The maids I kiss,
They shriek—Who's this?
I answer nought but ho, ho, ho!
Yet now and then, the maids to please,
At midnight I card up their wool;
And, while they sleep and take their ease,
With wheel to threads their flax I pull.
I grind at mill
Their malt up still;
I dress their hemp; I spin their tow;
If any wake,
And would me take,
I wend me, laughing, ho, ho, ho!
When any need to borrow aught,
We lend them what they do require:
And, for the use demand we nought;
Our own is all we do desire.
If to repay
They do delay,
Abroad amongst them then I go,
And night by night,
I them affright,
With pinchings, dreams, and ho, ho, ho!
When lazy queans have nought to do,
But study how to cog and lie:
To make debate and mischief too,
'Twixt one another secretly:
I mark their gloze,
And it disclose
To them whom they have wronged so:
When I have done,
I get me gone,
And leave them scolding, ho, ho, ho!
When men do traps and engines set
In loop-holes, where the vermin creep,
Who from their folds and houses get
Their ducks and geese, and lambs and sheep;
I spy the gin,
And enter in,
And seem a vermin taken so;
But when they there
Approach me near,
I leap out laughing, ho, ho, ho!
By wells and rills, in meadows green,
We nightly dance our heyday guise;
And to our fairy king and queen,
We chant our moonlight minstrelsies.
When larks 'gin sing,
Away we fling;
And babes new born steal as we go;
And elf in bed
We leave in stead,
And wend us laughing, ho, ho, ho!
From hag-bred Merlin's time, have I
Thus nightly revelled to and fro;
And for my pranks men call me by
The name of Robin Good-fellow.
Fiends, ghosts, and sprites,
Who haunt the nights,
The hags and goblins do me know;
And beldames old
My feats have told,
So vale, vale; ho, ho, ho!
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Quick list of things I particularly loved from NATLA Episode 3 - Omashu before my in-depth overview
The whole rebellion inside the Fire Nation - love seeing EVERYONE fighting back
"I think that's what they said - I never listened." ^_^
"What makes you think we're outsiders?"
"We ARE Fire Nation, even out here"
"Irrigation, am I right?" :D
Aang darting through a crowd messing up everyone's day - just straight from the animated!
And the first tease of the cabbage merchant!!!
Our Gaang wasting NO time after the explosion to run in and help
Bloodthirsty Teo ready to recruit Aang to carpet bombing the Fire Nation - yet another example of children's morals and sense of self being warped by this war
How proud Teo is of his father!!
Sokka being able to show his interest in tinkering and engineering!!!
And did I spy some ECLIPSE glasses????
Aang's "no, I'm not going to just leave people in trouble, I'm going to stay and help them any way I can" moment
"He's done the impossible" in the most mocking voice imaginable! XD Adore that Azula isn't afraid to mock her father
And Mai and Tylee cameos!!!!
And the Yuyan archers! So many hints to the future here
Katara practicing her waterbending forms even in the background - really showing that she's taking every opportunity to hone her skills - she's not just perfect immediately
JEEEEETTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!
Honestly first thought cart-boy might have been Haru, but once he caught the Mechanist meeting with the spy, my Jet senses started tingling
Jet's combat - perfect! Katara's skills - growing!!
LOVE how there's such a marked upgrade in Katara's control from her single ball of water and big splash of last episode to her controlled twin water ball attacks
Jet's bird-whistle signal
I started giggling maniacally, knowing what was coming!!
And that DAMN piece of straw XD
Sokka saying 'No, my role is to be a warrior and protect the village' with the most heartbreaking look on his face as he sees the skills he truly loves being devalued (or the perception that their devalued) and then Sai reassuring him and his frown turning into a hopeful look on the verge of a smile. Seriously, my heart, guys
Chills every time Smellerbee throws up her hand and shouts "Freedom Fighters!" and the whole camp cheers - really you see how they're a family, a community, healing together the best way they know how
Honestly, everything with Jet is great - him actually giving GOOD advice to Katara, making him a real person rather than someone who only cares about himself - I believe this Jet actually cares about Katara the person, not just Katara the weapon
Also the fact that there's only the small hand-brush as a romantic gesture, the rest of Katara and Jet's interactions keep strictly platonic - nowhere near as charged as all Sokka's interactions with Suki and Yue
Katara's mom smiling in the sunrise D;
Zuko's annoyance at Iroh loving the city XD
And Lotus tile reference!!
Sokka's paper bird!!!
And oooohhh here comes the fighting!
Such a great choice to pit the Mechanist (Sokka) against Jet (Katara) where they're BOTH bad! This isn't a one sibling is right scenario - both their new allies are doing bad stuff! Very juicy and great plot thread/theme weaving
"To prove you're a jerk!" "Oh yeah, well I don't need proof of that!!"
Cabbage merchant tease #2!!
SSCCAARRRFF ZUUUTTAARRRAAAAAAAAAAA
"This guy - again?" *rolly eyes*
Sokka's first mad plan!! Riding the crates to the palace!!
The Zuko/Aang fight - beautiful, stunning, stylized, classic
Zuko being beaten by a woman furious that he's hitting a child
"YOU READ MY DIARY!!!!!!!!" sorry, "YOU HAVE MY NOTEBOOK!!"
MY CABBAGEEEEESSSSSS!!!!!!!
Water HAWHIP!!!!
Iroh's first firebending in the show is him using it to draw attention to him so Zuko can escape :( not to harm anyone, but to protect
Aang's little "Uh oh o.o"
This was the first episode where it ended and I thought "I HAVE to watch the next one RIGHT NOW"
Damn you cliffhangers
[Masterlist of my NATLA thoughts]
#natla#avatar the last airbender#netflix avatar#atla#natla spoilers#sokka#katara#aang#jet#the mechanist#omashu
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kpop masterlist
🍓 = fluff themes
❄️ = angst themes
🚧 = smut themes
🤸♀️ = slice of life / bish idek what theme this is
🚀 = crack fic themes
🎩 = dark and/or violent themes
🏩 = genre fic, i.e. mystery, horror, fantasy, etc
🍳 = slow burn
🦕 = personal favorite
back to main masterlist
A.C.E.
Memory | 🍓❄️🦕 Kim Byeongkwan x Reader + Park Junhee x Reader (University AU) [Blurb]
Ateez
Only One | 🍓❄️❄️❄️🍳🦕 CEO!Choi San x Reader
BigBang
It’s An Act [WBU I] | ❄️ Choi Seunghyun (TOP) x Reader
Smoke | 🍓🤸♀️ Choi Seunghyun (TOP) x Reader
BTS
Runaway | 🍓❄️🏩 Mafia!Kim Seokjin (Jin) x Reader (Mafia AU) Preview 1 2 3 4 x
Mah Boyfriend | 🍓🍓🤸♀️🦕 Jung Jungkook x Idol!Reader
BTOB
Hidden Heart | 🍓🍓🍓🤸♀️🚀🍳 Lee Minhyuk (HUTA) x Idol!Reader [Headcanon]
Day6
A University Dilemma | 🤸♀️ Kang Younghyun (Young-K) x Reader (Univeristy AU)
What A Joke | ❄️ Kang Younghyun (Young K) x Reader + Park Jaehyung x Reader (University AU) [Blurb]
So... Haha... I Like You | 🍓🦕 Park Jaehyung x Reader (Fake Dating AU)
EXO
Wheel Of Fortune | 🍓🍳🚀 Park Chanyeol x Reader [Headcanon]
Welcome To The Jungle | 🚀🚀🚀🏩 Park Chanyeol & Oh Sehun (Jungle AU)
Maybe We Still Have A Shot [WBU III] | 🍓🍓🏩 CatHybid!Oh Sehun x Reader (University AU)
Unrequited Attraction | 🚧🏩🍳🦕 Mafia!Kim Jongdae (Chen) x Retail Worker!Reader
Color Palette | 🍓 Byun Baekhyun x Reader [Blurb]
Brown Leaves | 🍓 Kim Jongin (Kai) x Reader (University AU)
GOT7
One Million In One Day | 🍓🍓❄️❄️🍳 Sugar Daddy!Jackson Wang x Reader
Preview ~ Alternate Moodboard ~ Moodboard Teaser
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Car Rides | 🍓 Jackson Wang x Reader [Blurb]
Juice Box | 🍓🚀🏩🦕 Kunpimook Bhuwakul Bambam x Reader [Blurb] (Pre-Schooler AU)
Somewhere In Between | ❄️❄️Civil Engineer!Park Jinyoung x Reader + Architect!Henry Lau x Reader
Trading Secrets | 🍓🍓 Kim Yugyeom x WangSis!Reader
JYJ
Winning Losses | ❄️ Kim Jaejoong x Idol!Reader
Monsta X
Introspect | 🍓🤸♀️ Lee Jooheon x Reader [Blurb]
Letting Off Steam | 🤸♀️ Lee Hoseok (Wonho) x ArtStudent!Reader (University AU)
NCT
Seventeen
December Dates | 🍓🚀 bf!Seventeen x Reader [Headcanon]
The Stroke Of Midnight | 🍓❄️🏩🦕 Mafia!Kwon Soonyoung (Hoshi) x Reader
Here's My Problem: I Can't Get You Out Of My Head | ❄️❄️❄️🎩🎩🎩🏩🍳🦕 Detective!Jeon Wonwoo x Actress!Reader
10 Ways To Get Over Gyu | 🍓❄️❄️❄️🍳🍳🦕 Kim Mingyu x Reader + others (Childhood AU)
Half Of My Heart | 🍓❄️🤸♀️🍳 Kim Mingyu x Reader + Jeon Wonwoo x Reader (CEO AU)
On A Thread | ❄️❄️ CEO!Joshua Hong (Hong Jisoo) x Nurse!Reader
SF9
A Final Offering | 🍓🍓❄️🏩🦕 Deity!Kim Inseong & Child!Reader + Baek Juho (Zuho) x Mom
What Does It Mean? | 🍓❄️🤸♀️ Kim Inseong x Reader + Lee Jaeyoon x Reader (University AU)
16th Floor | 🍓🤸♀️ Kim Seokwoo (Rowoon) x Reader (Office AU)
SHINee
Understand This |❄️ Choi Minho x Reader I Don’t Understand [Understand This II] | ❄️ Choi Minho x Reader
It’s All A Big Joke [WBU II] | ❄️ Lee Taemin x Reader
Th-that’s Not | ❄️❄️🚧🦕 Lee Taemin x Reader Regrets [Th-that’s Not II] | ❄️ Lee Taemin x Reader
Angel Bride | ❄️🚧🏩🦕 Pirate!Lee Taemin x Reader
Noona, You're So Pretty | 🍓 Lee Taemin x Noona!Reader
Stray Kids
Professional Boundaries | 🍓❄️🚧🦕 CEO!Bang Chan x Pre-School Teacher!Reader + CEO!Hwang Hyunjin x Pre-School Teacher!Reader
1 2 3 4
Bootylicious | 🍓🚀 Bang Chan x Idol!Reader
Super Junior
The Soup | 🍓🍓🚀🚀 SuJu x SuJu Maknae!Reader [Headcanon]
Secrets Of A Maknae | 🍓🚀🚀 Kim Heechul x SuJuMaknae!Reader
The Boyz
Gentle With Me | 🍓🍓🤸♀️ Lee Sangyeon x Reader
TVXQ!
Pitter-Patter | 🍓 Jung Yunho (U-Know) x Reader (Pre-School Teacher AU)
The Art Of Deception | ❄️🎩🏩 Shim Changmin x Reader (Secret Agent/Spy AU)
TXT
Forget About It | 🍓❄️🤸♀️🍳🦕 Choi Soobin x Reader (University AU)
WINNER
I’m Not Playing | 🍓❄️❄️ Gangster!Song Minho (Mino) x Reader 1 2 3
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spy headcanon thread! just some of my personal thoughts and musings about his character :-) enjoy!
starting off by saying that spy is Absolutely Everything to me.. i've put his thread off for so long because i have SO much to say and im afraid i'll leave stuff out BUT we're going to take a Stab at it (😏) and i guess i'll just add more stuff later if i need! As Usual this is just pasted from my twitter so i'm sorry for any wonky formatting issues!
the most important thing to me about spy's character is that it is Varied and can be Contradictory. i say this about all of the mercs tbh but spy is among the Most important given his role/occupation as a spy. he IS A Spy, but he's also Just Some Guy (gender neutral).
spy is a bit dry; very sarcastic, a bit stoic, but he's definitely not heartless. i think he's very "emotionally in-tune" to those around him and prides himself on being able to read a room exceptionally well!
... but just because he knows what people might be thinking doesn't mean he's going to do anything about it! he likes being in the know but seldom ever enjoys interfering; it's best if he keeps out of the fray, or so he tells himself!
that being said, i Do think spy makes exceptions to this rule (which To Me is what makes his character Interesting!).... as we see in expiration date! he spends his "last living days" helping scout become a worthy date for miss pauling!
if he sees someone Floundering or really stuck in some kind of emotional squander, he'll pass by with a hand on the shoulder and a concise, discreet, kind word of advice in their ear and move on. no need for thanks, he's just Sharing an Observation! if you try to thank him, he'll give you a coy look and be like "for what?" but he knows. he's just letting you know you don't need to thank him <3
loves breaking balls. he'll help you if you ask him, but not before he gives you a LOT of shit for it. he'll volunteer himself to help you (even if you tell him you need his Stinking Help!) and he'll roll his eyes and say "ha! you are So helpless! i know you're glad i'm here to see this through with you uUu" LOL
but he will give you genuine insight and Surprisingly Good advice. huh, you didn't know he knew you so well! despite his job as a spy, he'll tell you to be authentic and will encourage you to listen to your instincts.
is an Observer First and an Action-taker second. prioritizes being in the know and likes being in the background (despite how good he is at being in the spotlight!). always thinks before he speaks, very calculated in everything he does!
got wiser with age. when he was younger i think he was quick to save his own skin and thought only about himself. among his first "selfless" acts were running out on scout and his mom to "protect" them, but with the wisdom of hindsight, that wasn't the smartest idea!
firmly believes in the power of respect. seems to have a positive relationship with all of his teammates (yes, even sniper, engineer and pyro lol) and scout's mom, too (regardless of how u see their relationship). tells scout that he has to earn pauling's respect to be worthy of her!
won't hesitate to stick his neck out for/work with people he appreciates. in the comics, he works with (and even prioritizes the safety of) miss pauling, helps sniper, and obviously comforts scout when he's dying in the way that Scout would want to be comforted. good job pops!
which brings me to dadspy... how i love you... i could make an entire other thread about my dadspy thoughts BUT i'll keep it "brief" here. i don't think he ever "treated scout like shit" nor do i think he was abusive to scout's mom or scout. he's just the world's most mediocre absent father to me... KDSKF
i think scout's mom knew What Spy Was and knew that at some point, he'd have to leave her. i think she's a perfectly capable woman who spy is genuinely still in love with (they have an open, long-distance relationship!) and is quite the deadly catch herself! perhaps i'll make a thread on her if that's something people would want....
i don't think she resents spy for running out and i think spy has complicated feelings about running out. he's convinced himself he did it for everyone involved's safety but in hindsight he Does feel a Bit (emphasis on Bit. it's not Earth Shatteringly Dramatic, just a little demon that sneaks up on him now and then...) guilty and tries to "make up for it" by Trying to get along with scout even if it's... not easy LOL. him turning into tom jones when scout died was to comfort scout the way Scout would want, which i think says a lot about spy's character.
however, once scout finds out the truth, i think he tells spy that he shouldn't have lied to him about it ("what kind of dumbass lies to their son on his deathbed! 🧍") and spy's like "ah... i suppose that... was also a mistake." and they smirk/smile at each other.. Road To Forgiveness begins..
also i personally love the running gag that everyone knows that spy is scout's dad (except for scout), not because i think spy would tell all/even some of the mercs but because it's SO obvious that all of them are like "i mean yeah.. doy". extra points if their knowledge Also surprises spy. "WHO TOLD YOU? HOW DID YOU KNOW?!" and the mercs are like ??? "erm... we have eyes...?" LOL
DESPITE being Stoic and Unknowable and Mysterious, he is also Quite the Doofus. one of my favorite and most important thoughts on his character. i think his authentic laugh is his snort laugh and i think that's what made scout's mom fall in love with him... :') has a great sense of humor.
loves playing pranks, causing mischief and being a Smug Cunt. will hide behind his Carefully Crafted Facade, but those who really know him (heavy, scout's mom) can see right through it! teaches scout some of his "best ones" (though not before pranking HIM with them first! it's okay though. scout's a good sport and gives him props LMAO)
a short list of spy's "best ones":
cleaning a glass door REALLY well and tricking the mercs to run into it at full force
oil on the kitchen floor so that anyone who comes running in will slam into the oven that engineer Just Fixed God Dammit! and destroy it
mentos in soda
scout and spy have the "same laugh" when they REALLY start howling. snorting, wheezing.... they sound almost identical. usually if they're laughing THAT hard, the rest of the mercs are looking at them like this >__> (covered in soda, can't get up from the ground because oil, etc)
obviously enjoys literature! language is one of his favorite things, though. loves learning about different dialects, slang, accents and learning the intricacies of grammar, too! likes studying the other mercs for this reason. the base is a fun, mixed bag for him!
the best secret keeper. contrary to popular belief, spy will NOT air your business if it's Serious. he might "let it slip" to medic that sniper sleeps with a stuffed animal, but he won't let anyone know that heavy has ptsd. he likes giving people shit, but not genuinely causing harm!
ah.. breaking balls as a love language.. this is something that i think is shared between spy, scout, and scout's mom. they LOOOOVE to give you shit, but it comes from a loving place. i think a lot of scout and spy's banter in exp date is like this:
it's not actually Insulting to either of them (spy calling scout a failure, scout telling spy to go to hell, etc) and is in fact more like a thing of Endearment. if you know people like this then you know what i'm talking about. idk how else to describe it KSDFKS
he is very girlfailure that thinks he's a girlboss but is actually a girlfailure and is coming to terms with his girlfailing. as i've said, spy isn't heartless. he knows he's made mistakes and knows his job has costed him a lot and now he's trying to reconcile with it. sometimes it's funny, sometimes its angsty!
is a total foodie and has a LOT of opinions about all kinds of cuisine! loves cooking with engineer and pyro (YES i think pyro is an INCREDIBLE chef. they only burn things because it's fun/funny! for the bit. you understand), and heavy has a perfect palette (just a personal hc of mine heh) so he always gets to tag along and taste test! <3
if spy is involved with any of the other mercs, scout's mom knows about it. they're in an open relationship and spy values her just like he'd value any of the mercs in a romantic relationship. she knows all of them and they're all very polite to her (ala like they are with miss pauling), but she quickly surprises them by being snarky and playful like spy and scout! she also doesn't hesitate to begin telling the mercs the most Humiliating Dirt on spy AND scout! HEHEHE
i don't think he'd cheat on her nor do i think he'd bother cheating on any of his partners. he's very open with communication when it comes to his interpersonal relationships (this is ironic to everyone but him because his relationship with his son is currently in shambles). he's good at it when it comes to romantic relationships though!
his love languages are, well, any and all of them! he loves being in love, he's a huge romantic and is not shy about showing it. will absolutely DROWN his partner in gifts and pretty words (that he really does mean!) and so on... perhaps to the point of it being a little overwhelming! at his partner's request, he'll dial it back... but he still loves to spoil his lovers, and THAT is something he WON'T apologize for! >:)
as i touched on earlier, has a good rapport with all of the mercs and pauling. he's patient with soldier and the other mercs hear him out about the bucket list idea (and are all Quietly Amused by how scout promptly ruins that for him. team dynamic ykwim). i think he's the closest with heavy (i'm a spoovy enjoyer), engineer, pyro, and sniper (BUT in kind of a "unique" way. perhaps i'll elaborate) but he enjoys the company of all of the other mercs as well!
is Informed about engineer's, demoman's and medic's research (though not on the levels they are of course) and likes being in the know about things going on around the base. he mostly shares enemy intelligence with these three over anyone else. they talk frequently and Love to gossip (engineer SWEARS its not gossiping but demo and medic are like "no. its gossip!" SKDFKSDF)!
will absolutely always enable you to treat yourself. scout, spy, medic and demo are the KINGS of "go on!! treat yourself!! :D" no matter what it is. if spy sees you really struggling about whether to get something, he'll slip it in with his own purchases and gift it to you later. "this one is from me, so you don't need to worry about compromise. <3"
in battle, he's a bit more sadistic than his teammates; likes making people squirm and is more than capable of getting under your skin. information extraction is part of his job and he treats it as such: Part Of The Job. he doesn't get a LOT of pleasure from hurting others, but he Does enjoy starring in a good revenge tale!
no, i do NOT think the world's most absent father cares about his 30 year old son's sex life nor do i think he's even "fiercely overprotective" of scout just in general. i think he knows scout is a grown man who has to make (and account for) any failures and fumbles he makes in his life. he'll be there with a kind word (and a few snarky ones!) when shit hits the fan, but he's not running around fighting scout's battles for him. scout loves battling too much to let him anyway! LOL
he teaches him things that Spy Himself values (like respect) because he... values it and since spy IS trying to be a bit more of a Dad to scout, it's also a reflection on him (to spy. scout doesn't care or think of it that way). insists on the value of self improvement! (something he himself didn't learn until he was Much Older... but scout doesn't need to know that!)
#ok FINE this is good enough for now...#-_-#hit tweet limit three times <3 i have things to SAY#dutchfoolery#dutchiehcs#mercthreads#<- yeas i have other mercs in there.. take a look if u want... heh#tf2#spy#rrgghhh sorry for the tags... grrhhh
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The Runaway Distance Life Of A Little Stark chapter 33: The Warehouse
Pairing: Tony Stark & daughter!Reader, Maria hill & Tony stark, Maria Hill & Reader, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanoff, Thor odinson & Bruce banner, Steve rogers & Tony Stark, Maria Hill & Avengers, JARVIS & Tony stark, FRIDAY & Tony stark
Summary: flashback, Avengers arrives in the warehouse, tony meets someone for the first time
Warning: Flashback
Co author with: callikc
Tag: @venomsvl @geeksareunique
You were exhausted.
It was a few weeks after The Mandarin destroyed your childhood home, and you had spent hours attempting to fix up something you'd retrieved from the rubble.
A stuffed bear.
It was your lunch break and you were huddled behind a desk on the SHIELD helicarrier with an empty coffee cup, a very messy lab, and a tablet playing a YouTube video on how to sew. You'd think that being one of the top engineers at the top spy agency in the world would grant knowledge on basic sewing ability.
Nope.
You were hunched over the table with a tiny needle in one hand and the tiny thread in the other. Your eyes were narrowed and your hands were trembling as you tried desperately to thread it correctly.
"All I want..." You muttered, attempting it again. "Is to fix... This damn ear!"
You sighed in exasperation as you yet again missed the eye of the needle.
As you dropped everything out of frustration, the door to the lab opened with a ping and Hill walked in. She had a cafeteria tray in her hands which consisted of an apple, a bottle of water, a main meal, and a side of cake.
She knew you well enough to know that you wouldn't eat unless reminded, and the fact that the only wrappers in the room were instant coffee ones, her worries were justified. Not to mention she was certain that Fury wouldn't approve if his star engineer wound up starving to death.
"Hi." You mumbled.
She couldn't resist a smile. "Rough day?"
"The roughest."
She walked over and set the tray down on the only vacant bit of table left over. As she caught sight of your tablet playing the sewing video, she arched a brow.
"The Director really wasn't kidding."
You lifted your head slightly to glance at her. "Hmm?"
"Sewing For Dummies." She read aloud.
"Oh." You dropped your head again. "I can make an AI, I can solve the most complex sums and equations, and I can maintain any kind of engine, but I can't thread a goddamn needle."
"Nobody's perfect."
"But how hard can it be? I mean, sewing is sewing!"
"Yeah, it is kinda embarrassing." She teased. "You're a genius and you're beaten by a thread."
You playfully glared. "Shut up."
"Hey, it's fine. Let me."
"What, you think you can do it?"
"I know I can."
You scoffed. "Bit cocky there, Agent."
Hill teased you with a smile once more before shooing you out of the chair. You grumbled about it but pulled up another chair from one of the other desks anyway.
"Eat." Your friend told you, motioning to the tray she'd brought in.
You sat down with a huff. "Yes, Mom."
She ignored the mumble and picked up the thread you were trying to tame. She licked her thumb and index finger before gently placing them over the end to ensure that no stray bits stuck out. You watched intently the entire time, munching on the cake.
"This the bear you mentioned to Director Fury?" She asked.
You nodded.
"What's the story?"
You held up a finger and swallowed your current mouthful before explaining.
"It belonged to Pepper. She loved it, and she's probably heartbroken. I found it in the rubble a couple weeks back."
Hill picked up the needle next, bringing it to her eye level. "Heartbroken is a strong word for a teddy bear."
"It's the only suitable one." You shrugged. "It's only a bear but it's been everywhere. Pepper's had it since she was little and kept it in Malibu with us."
"I see. Sorry about Malibu, by the way. It can't be easy."
"No, it's... It's not." You slouched in your chair as memories started filling your head again. "Even though it didn't feel like home, it still meant more to me than I realized. There were ups and downs and fights and laughs and I experienced all my firsts in that place. I even discovered SHIELD there."
"Yeah? How'd that happen? Stark?"
"Nah, Dad didn't tell me. I found my grandpa's old journals, though. Howard. He talked about being recruited for the SSR and founding SHIELD and marrying my grandma having my dad. I never met him, but I felt like I knew him. Actually found the warehouse files in that hidden box, too."
Hill paused what she was doing. "The warehouse? I thought you just found it?"
You stopped eating, realizing the slip up.
You could attempt a lie. You did a lot of it growing up and you seemed to have a knack for it. Still, this was Maria. She was probably the only person from work that you considered a genuine friend. She would probably detect a lie instantly anyway.
"Sorry." You apologized. "Might have bent the truth a little."
She didn't seem mad or anything. Just curious.
"Howard had a file on the warehouse then." She stated.
"Yeah, sorry. Apparently it's a Stark thing, hoarding secrets."
"I had noticed."
"Again, sorry."
"What was it for? The warehouse?"
"Just storage, I think. But there was something else."
You moved the food tray to grab a remote and tilted it towards the ceiling, hitting a button and watching as a screen slid down.
"Movie night?" Hill joked. "What's next, a romantic dinner?"
You smiled and rolled your eyes. "Next week, sweetheart."
You waited until the screen was fully down.
"FRIDAY." You called. "Turn off the lights and bring up Project U.N.Y.S.B."
-
Tony sat quietly in the quintet.
He was focused solely on the ground as his thoughts were consumed with your last words. Even though he had only heard it once, the entire will seemed to be stuck in his head. He didn't have anything better to do on the flight other than analyze it.
The Avengers were each doing their own thing as music played through the speakers. While Tony was thinking, Natasha was co-piloting the jet with Hill as Steve talked to them about where they were going, Bruce had his own music and was listening intently to his headphones, Clint was apparently passed out on the other bench, and Thor was watching the clouds roll by without a care in the world.
Tony gradually tried to move his mind away from your words and attempted to look at a photo nearby. It was the photo of you posing like him that he had found a few days ago. It was resting on top of your SHIELD uniform right beside the medals they had awarded you.
It was hard to imagine you that happy. All he'd ever known was your anger and resentment. Sixteen years of frowns and tantrums. The only genuine smile he could vividly remember was the one you gave him on the day you died.
"Hey, Tony?"
He tore his eyes away from the picture and found Steve now sitting next to him. He nodded to acknowledge the captain.
"We've got an ETA of three minutes." Steve told him. "Agent Hill said we'd be there in no time."
As he said this, Natasha switched off the music. Clint shot up immediately.
"I was listening to that!" He whined.
She smirked. "Sorry, princess."
"Come on, that was a good song."
"Were you really listening?" Tony questioned with both an amused and genuinely curious tone. "You looked dead."
Clint pouted. "It's called beauty sleep."
"Ah. Right. You might want to clock in another decade, Aurora."
After the comment, he slouched back against the wall of the jet, glancing over at the picture again. Steve noticed and followed his gaze, a sympathetic expression on his features.
"You doing okay?" He asked.
The other man simply shrugged.
"It's still hard to believe." Steve confessed. "Ellen was just... Sorry, I mean (Y/n). She was so... Normal."
Tony scoffed in amusement. "What did you expect?"
"I don't know. She's your kid so I guess I expected... A lot."
"Gee, thanks, Cap."
"No offense. When I met her as Ellen she was kind. And generous. She made it a mission to help me feel at home when I woke up. I guess I just didn't expect that. From anyone, really."
"What'd she do?"
"She improved the suit. Made it modern but kept to the original design. She got me one of those tablet things for drawing, too. She always stopped to talk to me when we passed in hallways."
"So that's where it came from." Tony mused, having wondered about the suit for quite some time now. "She was right there the whole time."
"Yeah... She was amazing."
The other man eyed his friend. "You didn't have a thing for her, did you?"
"No!" Steve sat even straighter, his eyes wide. "I wouldn't, Tony."
Although he spoke the truth, it wasn't the whole truth. After running into you several times and having lengthy conversations about many different things, there had been a moment or two when Steve couldn't help but wonder what would happen if he had built up the courage to ask you out for dinner or a drink. Luckily he hadn't, especially since Tony probably would have killed him for it.
"Just making sure." Tony said. "How are you doing, by the way? Improved much?"
Knowing he meant the injuries from the Triskelion, Steve nodded. "Good as new."
"Great. Sorry to hear about Barnes. I guess HYDRA really gets off on ruining lives, huh?"
"Yeah, sure seems like it."
"You gonna go out and find him?"
"I've got to. He's my best friend and he's... He's lost. I gotta help him."
"No, I get it. Good luck."
"Thanks."
Just then, Hill stood from her seat. She turned to address them all.
"We're almost there." She said. "(Y/n)'s place should be visible through the window."
Tony was the first to stand.
Through the dissipating clouds he could spot what appeared to be a very old warehouse building sitting next to a gorgeous lake. There were even more buildings among it, three main ones and several smaller ones dotted around.
All of these structures were bordering a luscious clearing of towering grass and a driveway system. Furthermore, behind all of this was what appeared to be a thick forest decorated with hundreds of trees.
There were murmurs from all of the Avengers as they each took in the place.
Thor was particularly amazed by all the greenery. "Lady (Y/n) left such a majestic place?"
"Majestic isn't the word I'd use." Clint commented, eyeing the wild lawn especially.
"Looks pretty good for abandoned." Bruce argued. "It's quiet."
"Peaceful." Steve agreed. "What do you think, Tony?"
Tony was subconsciously smiling a little as he observed the grounds and the lake. True, it was overgrown, but it was actually a nice place from an aerial view.
"It's nice." Was all he managed to say.
It was a simple review, but the others could hear the emotion behind it.
"I bet it was a SHIELD base." Clint guessed. "Abandoned, obviously."
Natasha took a moment to consider the warehouse as well. "Some rich guy's place."
"Hospital." Bruce said. "It's big enough."
"Some kind of training ground?" Steve also guessed.
Tony didn't put in an answer, he continued to just watch as the buildings drew closer.
It was hard to believe that after half a decade of searching, you could have just been Upstate the entire time. It was actually a big knock down to him. Years of looking all over the country and you were a matter of miles away.
How didn't he notice something?
"You're both right." Hill said, looking to both Clint and Natasha. "Agent Romanoff, care to take over?"
"Got it." Natasha nodded, taking control over the jet.
"There's another clearing just past the stacks."
With the landing being taken care of, Hill moved to a different spot, typing in a code on a keypad. After taking confirmation, a blue outline appeared in the wall which soon revealed a hidden compartment. From inside this she took out a tablet of some kind.
"Stark." She called, getting the man's attention. "Take a look at this."
Tony walked over as she projected the tablet screen into a hologram. Everyone watched curiously as the title 'Project U.N.Y.S.B.' appeared.
"What's this?" Tony questioned. "A new design? A mission? SHIELD sex tape?"
She gave him a look. "No. U.N.Y.S.B. goes with the warehouse. Upstate New York Stark Warehouse Base. It's got everything about this place inside."
"So what's the story?"
"The warehouse was being renovated decades back by Howard Stark before it was abandoned when he died."
Various reactions were shown.
Nastasha victoriously punched Clint's shoulder and he in turn muttered something about owing twenty bucks on a technicality, Steve was genuinely surprised to find out that his old friend owned the place, Thor of course didn't know the significance of the name so couldn't have much of a reaction, and Bruce was pleasantly surprised too. Tony, on the other hand, found himself both bewildered and shocked.
His dad owned it? How? For how long? Why this place? How could you have just happened to stumble upon it?
"Did (Y/n) know?" He asked. "Is that why she came here?"
"All I know is what she told me." Hill shrugged. "She was thirteen, found a box in your library from Howard's stuff."
"Why didn't she tell me?"
"Apparently you were busy with... Other things. It was one the few things she took when she disappeared."
Tony went silent. He knew that 'busy' meant he had simply just neglected you. Looking back he hated himself even more. He wished he could tell his past self to just put away all the damn inventions and listen to you for once. He wasn't his dad's biggest fan either, but nowadays he wouldn't have minded looking through it all with you.
Before he could ask anything else, Nastaha successfully landed the jet.
It felt like an age before the door finally opened onto a grassy clearing.
It was slightly more trimmed in this part of the warehouse estate. The trees were more scarce and they could only just see the sparkle of the lake from over the tips of the small mounds of greenery. The smell of the outdoors was actually very appealing, too.
"Follow me." Hill instructed, leading already.
The Avengers - for once - did as they were told, and promptly followed her towards the largest of the buildings. As they made their way across the clearing, she also pointed out the smaller structures, labeling them as storage and advising them to not mix up the buildings.
Finally, they reached the main entrance.
"Ready?" She asked, the question mostly directed at Tony.
He took in a sharp breath and shrugged. "Do we get a choice?"
With that confirmation, Hill revealed a key from inside her bag and slotted it into the door.
"So, my old man owned this place?" Tony clarified.
"Yeah."
"And now (Y/n) wants us to have it?"
"It's what she put in the will. She thought you could make better use out of it than an old storage compound."
He nodded and remained silent, simply watched as the door finally opened. He couldn't help but wonder what your life was like here. Did you enjoy it? Were you ever scared? How long exactly did you stay there? What was it like for you going constantly between here and Queens? Why did his father build this place?
The first room was dark.
Too dark.
As the slither of light expanded to reveal more of the cream walls and rough floor, something small emerged from the darkness, glowing and making the sound of a low groan as it approached.
Thor immediately went on the defensive, Mjölnir grasped tightly in his hand. Without warning he threw the mighty hammer in the direction of the glowing and groaning and a loud shatter followed suit, many of the other individuals jumping at the crash. With a slight thruming sound, the hammer returned.
Now with the door fully open, the source of the noise was revealed. In a pile of rubble - bits and pieces still sparking - looked what appeared to be a tiny robot.
"The oppressor has been defeated." Thor declared.
Hill turned to him with a deadpan look. "That's a cleaning bot."
He frowned. "A cleaning... Bot?"
"(Y/n) made a few to keep the place in check when she was away."
Clint smirked. "Impressive, big guy. The oppressive cleaner has been defeated."
Natasha smirked. "Really saved us there, Thor."
Thor didn't care about their teasing, but he instead looked to Tony. "My apologies, Stark. Allow me to clean the mess."
"No need." Hill told him. "Like I said, (Y/n) made a dozen different models."
True enough, four more cleaning bots appeared from slots in the wall. Each one was a different color - blue, red, orange, and pink - and made their way over to the mess of their predecessor. They simply formed a circle around the mess and all at once vacuumed it up as if nothing happened.
"Cute." Bruce commented.
"You knew about these." Tony stated, looking at Hill. "Have you been here before?"
The woman shrugged. "After (Y/n) told me about it. She showed me around a few times."
"Any tourist activities you recommend?"
"Just take it all in. As much time as you need."
Hill knew FRIDAY was around somewhere but she didn't want to tell him about that just yet. She thought it would be better for him to discover it himself.
-
The group had split up shortly after arriving at the compound.
Natasha had found her way into what appeared to be an old gym of sorts. It was well lit due to the wall-high windows on one side of the room and a lot of the equipment looked like it had been used recently, by Hill or by you she didn't know exactly.
The room itself seemed split into rows, each one with a different kind of equipment such as legs, arms, weights, and gymnastics etc. Natasha passed these rows curiously until she came to a door. Opening this, she was pleasantly surprised to find a shooting range.
She wondered why you would have one to yourself if you worked for SHIELD. Agents were of course required to use the SHIELD ranges for their training, but it was an elective for the engineers and scientists also. It was still useful, though, and she could already see herself spending some time there to brush up on her skills.
She moved towards a further back room and found the weapon storage. Among this was also a set of suits.
For her.
There was a white one labeled 'The Winter Widow', and a black one just like her usual suit named 'The Spare.'
Natasha couldn't help but smirk.
-
Steve had wound up on the other side of the main building, crossing some red tape that blocked the area off.
It was a large space covered by dust and grime, most likely part of the warehouse that you hadn't touched. It was extremely spacious, too. Perhaps it could be renovated into a series of bedrooms or offices, perhaps even a debriefing room for their missions.
-
Bruce had found a lounge, or at least the potential for one.
You hadn't done much to the original space, but a few red couches and coffee tables had been dragged into the area and made up to look like a living room. However, it wasn't this arrangement that intrigued him, it was a framed picture beside the television that had been set up.
After moving closer and putting on his glasses he realized that it was himself and you in the picture. He gently lifted it up and caught sight of his own signature glinting in the dim light. You had asked for it during your first meeting if he remembered correctly.
He also noted objects from later interactions that had also been signed such as a 'besties 4 life' mug and a copy of his very first dissertation on gamma radiation.
Bruce found himself smiling as he set the picture back down. Even if it had been a while, he was still grateful that you spoke to him about science instead of The Hulk like everyone else wanted to.
"Pop Tarts!" A sudden shout exclaimed.
Bruce, startled, turned around to see that Thor had joined him in the lounge area and was now looking through the kitchen side of the room.
"These Midgardian kitchens are a wonder!" The god continued to exclaim, shaking the box vigorously. "Lady (Y/n) has excellent taste!"
He quickly proceeded to rip open the box and take out the first packet, his eyes alight with excitement. During this little moment, he locked eyes with Bruce who was still watching in silence.
"Are they not free?" He questioned.
Bruce raised a brow. "I mean... (Y/n) said the place was ours."
Soon enough, more of the cleaning bots from before had shown up to hastily sweep away the crumbs at Thor's feet.
-
Clint, contrary to the rest of his team, had strayed from the central buildings.
He headed over to the place he imagined to be a hangar. There was no particular reason why, he was just intrigued to see if you'd made use of the space. From the outside it looked like an abandoned pool house or another storage unit. Hill hadn't mentioned it, probably another reason he was interested in seeing inside.
The entrance was a pair of sliding doors. He pulled them both aside and let the light stream in. Other than the parts the outside illuminated, it was pitch black.
"Should've paid your bills, Little Stark." He remarked, stepping inside.
He used the flashlight from his cell phone to light the place up and look for a switch. Thankfully, there was one. Once it was flipped, blinds covering all the windows began to flip and lift up slowly.
Clint winced a little from the direct light. However, once his eyes adjusted, he was stunned by what had now appeared in the room.
"Holy... Shit." He grinned.
-
Tony had found Howard's journals.
It was the very same box that you had stumbled upon over a decade beforehand. While the rest of the team explored, he had spent the hour reading entry after entry until finally he was at the last one.
December 2nd, 1991
Electricity is a work in progress.
The warehouse compound is still under construction while Maria and I look for the new interiors.
The medical wing needs more gurneys.
Perhaps we could turn the west wing building into a library or pool. Might be nice.
It's a nice place to retire.
H.S
Tony could tell that from the date alone that it was the last entry. Exactly two weeks later, Howard and Maria Stark would die in a car accident.
Tony missed his mother just as much as he missed you. His dad, on the other hand, was a very complicated situation. He didn't know much love growing up but even after all of that, Howard was still the man who raised him. Of course a part of Tony would always mourn.
Still, he also knew that his rough upbringing was also his own fault. He was a difficult son, he was aware, and he wished he could change it. Perhaps in another life things were different and he had both parents and his little girl back.
"Mr. Stark?" JARVIS spoke up.
Tony quickly closed the journal, putting it back with the other ones.
"What's up?" He asked aloud.
"Forgive me for the intrusion, but I detect a familiar presence nearby." The AI explained.
"Oh?"
"I believe the source to be the room named 'Laboratory - Lair of Genius', approximately two minutes walk away."
"How fun. We love ominous presences."
Tony pushed the box to the side as he got to his feet and started walking. The corridor was dark, but just bright enough to navigate.
"What's that familiar presence exactly?" He asked.
"Another artificial intelligence, I believe." JARVIS told him.
Before long, Tony stopped at the door his friend had mentioned and saw a plague stuck to it with the name and your initials inside. Was it your vacation room? A hobby house?
With his heart pounding, he pushed open the door.
Inside was a room that was both messy yet organized, much like his own rooms back home. In one corner was an area dedicated to plans and prints. It had a couple of tables pushed together and the surface was dotted with blueprints and rough sketches of potential projects or inventions.
In another corner was a laundry basket overflowing with clothes. Some were also scattered on the floor among shoes and different kinds of cloth. Hidden among all of this litter was a certain file labeled 'ULTRON' that he hadn't noticed yet.
A tall mannequin stood beside the couch/bed as well. It was dressed in a white suit, much like Natasha's black one. There was a chest of drawers by that too which contained headphones, weapons that looked magnet-operated (like when Steve's shield returned to him during the fight), stationary that was probably a little more lethal than it looked, and a dozen bullet casings.
Tony only glanced at this, however, as his attention was instead drawn to a notebook that lay open in the lab area of the room. It was a calendar with schedules and dates marked down for various projects you had been working on, as well as parts of the compound that needed fixing or improving.
Tony had mixed feelings about it all, both in awe of your workload and dedication but also concerned since it looked like a hell of a lot packed into one. Your sleep schedule couldn't have been healthy.
He observed the rest of the lab area and noticed a switched off computer blinking red.
Tony put it aside for that moment and turned on the computer. Instead of just the power light, the entire screen flashed brightly. A form of scanning technology seemed to assess the entire room - and himself - before it turned green and disappeared. The next thing he knew, a hologram resembling a sound bar filled the room.
"Hello, Mr. Stark." It greeted in a female automated voice
Tony raised a brow, intrigued. "Hey..."
"My name is FRIDAY. I'm the artificial intelligence created by Miss (Y/n) Stark. It's a pleasure to finally meet you."
#tony stark#ironman#tony stark x daughter!reader#stark! daughter#steve rogers#captain america#maria hill#bruce bannner#hulk#thor odinson#natasha romanoff#black widow#clint barton#hawekeye#mcu#marvel#avengers
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Lower Decks 4x10 (season finale)
I liked this a lot! All the threads from earlier in the season tied together neatly (but not obnoxiously neatly), and I very much liked that Mariner's situation felt like one she'd been in and made different choices in before (e.g., going with Petra), but was now reacting differently as a result of her growth this season. It was nice to hear her say "I still believe in the mission," since she so often has tried to hide that but it's so, so obvious that she does. It worked well with her conversation with Ma'ah in the last episode.
Something I feel has been overlooked a bit in the fandom is Captain Freeman's tremendous character development this season. We really got to see how much of a smart, determined, thinking-outside-the-boxish rebel-for-a-good-cause she is, and how she absolutely influenced her daughter, holy hell, they are two peas in a pod. I really liked that she got to either engineer the solution to the problem of the week or be a key part of it in almost every episode. It's so easy in something focused on characters lower down in the hierarchy to make the higher ranking characters idiots so the main characters can shine. Lower Decks has deftly avoided that this year, not only with Carol but also Ransom and Shax, who each have things to teach our lower deckers. It's nice to see the lower decks crew still needing to learn things from their superiors.
It seems obvious next season is going to focus on Tendi, which I am not mad about, as the kids say. Leaning into her Orion-ness made her a vastly more interesting character, so I'm looking forward to more of that. Her "You've got this" at the end was probably just psyching herself up for something she didn't want to do, but a small part of me wonders if Starfleet took the opportunity to turn her into a double agent/spy. Would be a nice counterpoint to the narrative's renewed belief in the Starfleet mission here. More like, "We still believe in the mission, but damn, you guys fuck up sometimes," which is a very Lower Decks sentiment.
The Locarno/Paris conversation between Rutherford and Boimler was hilarious. "Um, the Maquis would like a word" was even more hilarious. Locarno maybe should have studied up how non-hierarchical organizations work rather than trying recreate Starfleet, but with him as Admiral-in-Chief.
There were other fun bits here and there, but I think those are the highlights for me.
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more random tf2 headcannons :) (modern addition!)
Engineer likes Lego’s. He LOVES the fact that there’s a toy out there that empowers kids to create, he loves the Lego typewriter and is obsessed with the Lego creators sets. (Bonsai tree, sky wars mask, etc.) if you ask him about it he’ll be like “I think it’s great kids are learnin’ to build such things.” But he will never admit he actually wants the legos. Give him legos? So happy. In general, he likes puzzles. He loves games that have puzzles like Portal.
Pyro loves video games. Any game he’s up for it. I can see him as a MAJOR Kirby fan. He’d probably play Kirby games all day long if he got the chance to. Sometimes when he notices Engie working a little too much, he will drag him to their room and play Mario kart together. Sometimes he asks others, like scout!
Heavy doesn’t play many video games, but wanna know what he likes? Chess. He loves strategy and often plays with Medic, Spy, and Engineer. Snipers quite good at it, but he likes to watch instead so he can see how much each player struggle against each other. He finds it funny, yet insanely interesting.
Demoman and Soldier shop a lot. for the most random bullshit they can find. On some nights when everyone is asleep, they’ll sneak out to like a target and pick out the most random bullshit they can find. If anyone catches them while they try to sneak out, they ask them to come along. One time Scout and heavy came along and heavy ended up having a migraine over the three men wearing the most ridiculously stupid looking yet expensive clothing anyone has ever bought. He thinks it’s funny but is also questioning the amount of money they’ve spent in one night. He’s never coming with ever again.
Scout is really good at ALL the arcade games. But one thing he’s super good at? Claw machines and fucking DDR. He thinks of it as fun legwork and loves the competitive aspect of it. Trust me when I say he’s full combod all the fucking hard songs. Sometimes he’d just play to let out the stress tho. He’d play songs like Love Is Orange, A, and of course a CLASSIC fucking Butterfly (if u don’t know any of these songs I understand because barely nobody knows these, I just play a shit ton of ddr)
Medic has a twitter account where he just spams about how annoying the other mercs are at the medbay, if they’re treating him badly expect a whole thread on it. It’s private, everyone is on there and miss Pauling likes to reply and absolutely cackles at his tweets.
“These imbeciles get on my fucking nerves sometimes mein gott.” -medic
“I’m guessing you had a rough day?” -missp
“Yes. Scout screams like a final girl from a horror movie and demoman spilled his booze all over my table. If this job doesn’t kill them I will I swear.” -medic
“Wow…uh. I’m so sorry.” -missp
“No need to feel sorry, they might boss me around but I still have the pregnancy pen. If anyone gets out of line I’ll make them go through the worst pain of all, motherhood.” -medic
“OH.” -missp
“wtf” -scout
Spy is one of those competitive sports fans, but not in terms of sport, in terms of music. I can see him talking about his favorite jazz artist then go crazy that a pop artist who’s “nothing like *insert his fav artist*” is at the top of the billboard charts.
“HE IS MUCH MORE TALENTED THAN ANY OF THESE IDIOTIC POPSTARS. HOW THEY MAKE THESE VILE SONGS…ITS NOT ART! Nothing will compare to him, his music is like heaven to one’s ear…*rambles*”
Sniper goes to pet adoption centers to play around with the pets. He has this dog he plays with a lot, her name is Molly and he adores her.
“Your a cheeky girl aren’t cha? Your so cute…yes you are, yes you are.” He says as he’s petting Molly in his arms.
Nobody knows this except Pauling, who caught him while she was in the area. He walked in with a frown but walked out with the happiest grin shes ever seen on any man.
#tf2#tf2 headcanons#tf2 engineer#tf2 scout#tf2 pyro#tf2 heavy#tf2 medic#tf2 demoman#tf2 spy#tf2 sniper#tf2 soldier#tf2 pauling
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hiii!!
first of all, i want to say that I LOVE YOUR HCS SO MUCH!!! in fact, they're so good that every single time i read what you post i get the most dopey smile on my face 💝 you never fail to make my day so much better :///) (also, if you have a lot going on right now please don't feel pressured to answer this!)
secondly, as someone who has a quite impressive (if i do say so myself!) silly sock collection, im really curious: what socks would each merc wear? ive got these really cute fuzzy pink unicorn socks that remind me of pyro, and thats what inspired me asking this!
—🧦 sock anon (can i be called that? if so, he/she! (#^.^#) )
you can absolutely be Sock!
Scout: traditional baseball socks. he wears nothing else, no matter what the weather or the occasion or what else he's wearing. he does own several pairs of socks with obvious misprints on them but he doesn't wear them
Soldier: plain, white-and-gray socks. the catch is he likes to draw faces on them with marker that'll be washed off when he does laundry so then he can draw new ones on after. it's the only way he can make sure they stayed paired up
Pyro: doesn't matter. they'll mix and match and wear all different kinds. all of their socks are just in one drawer and whatever first two they grab is what they wear that day
Demoman: whatever's comfortable. he doesn't like wearing socks and will only tolerate it as long as they cushioned on the bottom and not made of any sort of itchy material. it's hard finding socks he likes, so he tends to wear his socks down to the threads
Heavy: plain, single-color socks. he only keeps one pair of a color at any given time to make sure they don't get mixed up. most may think it's boring but he likes the organization in his sock drawer
Engineer: very thick socks, color or design doesn't matter. he's dropped one too many wrenches on his feet and the added cushion helps. his feet are always unbearably hot but it's a small price to pay
Medic: plaid patterened socks. they look tacky as hell and he loves it. no one ever sees them but he knows they're there. he also has a pair of socks with bird faces on the top that he wears only in his off time. sometimes Archimedes still tries attacking them and he things it's hysterical
Sniper: he has one pair of thick socks he wears around the base because his feet get cold real easy. other than that, he doesn't care. he buys whatever is cheapest but has the most and sure they end up falling apart really fast but he'll probably still wear them
Spy: black socks, various materials and thickness so he is able to wear them year-round. but he always wears sock garters to keep them up. and they're also equipped with an arsenal of miniature knives and guns
it also makes me really, really happy to hear that! I'm glad people still really love this blog, I know it's lost a lot of traction as of late and so seeing people still check in and find this and even still wanna see my takes on the Mercs (outside of my sideblog ofc) still just makes me really happy
#tf2#team fortress 2#tf2 headcanons#tf2 scout#tf2 soldier#tf2 pyro#tf2 demoman#tf2 heavy#tf2 engineer#tf2 medic#tf2 sniper#tf2 spy#sharing one braincell#//Sock Anon
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(little spy is precious:) )
little!spy panicking over a first time accident, and cg engineer helping him?
This was not his greatest idea. Spy didn't think his teammates would treat him the same if they learned that he regressed, even if Sniper showed the opposite, so instead of telling anyone that he was regressed, he pretended he wasn't. It somewhat worked, Engineer seemed suspicious about him, until he had an accident. He knew it was possible, he was regressed quite young and only hanging onto his adult headspace by a thread, but he didn't expect it to actually happen, and in his expensive suit nonetheless! Now he sat on the floor of the hallway crying with his thumb in his mouth.
"What in sam hell is goin- spy?" Engineer found him. Spy whined and refused to even look at him.
"Hey. Come here little guy. Let's get you cleaned up." Engineer picked him up. Spy whined.
"It's alright, I ain't gonna hurt you. I won't even do anything you don't want me to." Engineer carried Spy to his bedroom. Considering how everything in there was very expensive looking, Engineer sat Spy down on the floor. Little spy might not care about getting things dirty but big spy certainly did. Looking in his closet, Engineer quickly realized that Spy did not have any little clothes and all of his pajamas were expensive. Engineer sighed and carried him to his own bedroom instead. He found some soft pajamas that would probably fit Spy and laid them out. Engineer was glad that his room was one of the ones with an attached bathroom.
"Alright. Do you want me to help ya out of that suit or can you do it on your own?" Engineer asked. Spy made grabby hands at Engineer and whined. Engineer helped him undressed, washed him, then helped him get dressed.
"There's a clean baby!" Spy giggled and put his thumb back in his mouth.
"You shouldn't suck on your thumb kiddo. Let's get your pacifier." Spy looked away.
"Do you not have a pacifier?" Engineer asked. Spy nodded. It never occurred to Engineer that Spy might be new to regressing.
"That's alright. Hey, I have a pacifier I don't use anymore. You can have it!" Spy looked up at him. Engineer fetched the pacifier and cleaned it off before giving it to him. It was plain and matched the team color. Spy seemed to like having a pacifier but not one that was so...boring. Engineer got an idea.
"Hey. Let's go see if Pyro's got anything we can decorate it with!" Spy clapped. Engineer laughed and picked him up. He was glad he got Spy from crying to happy.
#age regression#agere#fandom agere#tf2#tf2 engineer#tf2 spy#accident#the big adventures of little spy
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Delegating trust is really, really, really hard (infosec edition)
CORRECTION: A previous version of this thread reported that Trustcor has the same officers as Packet Forensics; they do not; they have the same officers as Measurement Systems. I regret the error.
I’ve got trust issues. We all do. Some infosec pros go so far as to say “trust no one,” a philosophy more formally known as “Zero Trust,” that holds that certain elements of your security should never be delegated to any third party.
The problem is, it’s trust all the way down. Say you maintain your own cryptographic keys on your own device. How do you know the software you use to store those keys is trustworthy? Well, maybe you audit the source-code and compile it yourself.
But how do you know your compiler is trustworthy? When Unix/C co-creator Ken Thompson received the Turing Prize, he either admitted or joked that he had hidden back doors in the compiler he’d written, which was used to compile all of the other compilers:
https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/11/rene-descartes-was-a-drunken-fart/#trusting-trust
OK, say you whittle your own compiler out of a whole log that you felled yourself in an old growth forest that no human had set foot in for a thousand years. How about your hardware? Back in 2018, Bloomberg published a blockbuster story claiming that the server infrastructure of the biggest cloud companies had been compromised with tiny hardware interception devices:
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/features/2018-10-04/the-big-hack-how-china-used-a-tiny-chip-to-infiltrate-america-s-top-companies
The authors claimed to have verified their story in every conceivable way. The companies whose servers were said to have been compromised rejected the entire story. Four years later, we still don’t know who was right.
How do we trust the Bloomberg reporters? How do we trust Apple? If we ask a regulator to investigate their claims, how do we trust the regulator? Hell, how do we trust our senses? And even if we trust our senses, how do we trust our reason? I had a lurid, bizarre nightmare last night where the most surreal events seemed perfectly reasonable (tldr: I was mugged by invisible monsters while trying to order a paloma at the DNA Lounge, who stole my phone and then a bicycle I had rented from the bartender).
If you can’t trust your senses, your reason, the authorities, your hardware, your software, your compiler, or third-party service-providers, well, shit, that’s pretty frightening, isn’t it (paging R. Descartes to a white courtesy phone)?
There’s a joke about physicists, that all of their reasoning begins with something they know isn’t true: “Assume a perfectly spherical cow of uniform density on a frictionless surface…” The world of information security has a lot of these assumptions, and they get us into trouble.
Take internet data privacy and integrity — that is, ensuring that when you send some data to someone else, the data arrives unchanged and no one except that person can read that data. In the earliest days of the internet, we operated on the assumption that the major threat here was technical: our routers and wires might corrupt or lose the data on the way.
The solution was the ingenious system of packet-switching error-correction, a complex system that allowed the sender to verify that the recipient had gotten all the parts of their transmission and resend the parts that disappeared en route.
This took care of integrity, but not privacy. We mostly just pretended that sysadmins, sysops, network engineers, and other people who could peek at our data “on the wire” wouldn’t, even though we knew that, at least some of the time, this was going on. The fact that the people who provided communications infrastructure had a sense of duty and mission didn’t mean they wouldn’t spy on us — sometimes, that was why they peeked, just to be sure that we weren’t planning to mess up “their” network.
The internet always carried “sensitive” information — love letters, private discussions of health issues, political plans — but it wasn’t until investors set their sights on commerce that the issue of data privacy came to the fore. The rise of online financial transactions goosed the fringe world of cryptography into the mainstream of internet development.
This gave rise to an epic, three-sided battle, between civil libertarians, spies, and business-people. For years, the civil liberties people had battled the spy agencies over “strong encryption” (more properly called “working encryption” or just “encryption”).
The spy agencies insisted that civilization would collapse if they couldn’t wiretap any and every message traversing the internet, and maintained that they would neither abuse this facility, nor would they screw up and let someone else do so (“trust us,” they said).
The business world wanted to be able to secure their customers’ data, at least to the extent that an insurer would bail them out if they leaked it; and they wanted to actually secure their own data from rivals and insider threats.
Businesses lacked the technological sophistication to evaluate the spy agencies’ claims that there was such a thing as encryption that would keep their data secure from “bad guys” but would fail completely whenever a “good guy” wanted to peek at it.
In a bid to educate them on this score, EFF co-founder John Gilmore built a $250,000 computer that could break the (already broken) cryptography the NSA and other spy agencies claimed businesses could rely on, in just a couple hours. The message of this DES Cracker was that anyone with $250,000 will be able to break into the communications of any American business:
https://cryptome.org/jya/des-cracker.htm
Fun fact: John got tired of the bar-fridge-sized DES Cracker cluttering up his garage and he sent it to my house for safekeeping; it’s in my office next to my desk in LA. If I ever move to the UK, I’ll have to leave it behind because it’s (probably) still illegal to export.
The deadlock might have never been broken but for a key lawsuit: Cindy Cohn (now EFF’s executive director) won the Bernstein case, which established that publishing cryptographic source-code was protected by the First Amendment:
https://www.eff.org/cases/bernstein-v-us-dept-justice
With cryptography legalized, browser vendors set about securing the data-layer in earnest, expanding and formalizing the “public key infrastructure” (PKI) in browsers. Here’s how that works: your browser ships with a list of cryptographic keys from trusted “certificate authorities.” These are entities that are trusted to issue “certificates” to web-hosts, which are used to wrap up their messages to you.
When you open a connection to “https://foo.com," Foo sends you a stream of data that is encrypted with a key identified as belonging to “foo.com” (this key is Foo’s “certificate” — it certifies that the user of this key is Foo, Inc). That certificate is, in turn, signed by a “Certificate Authority.”
Any Certificate Authority can sign any certificate — your browser ships with a long list of these CAs, and if any one of them certifies that the bearer is “Foo.com,” that server can send your browser “secure” traffic and it will dutifully display the data with all assurances that it arrived from one of Foo, Inc’s servers.
This means that you are trusting all of the Certificate Authorities that come with your browser, and you’re also trusting the company that made your browser to choose good Certificate Authorities. This is a lot of trust. If any of those CAs betrays your trust and issues a bad cert, it can be used to reveal, copy, and alter the data you send and receive from a server that presents that certificate.
You’d hope that certificate authorities would be very prudent, cautious and transparent — and that browser vendors would go to great lengths to verify that they were. There are PKI models for this: for example, the “DNS root keys” that control the internet’s domain-name service are updated via a formal, livestreamed ceremony:
https://www.cloudflare.com/dns/dnssec/root-signing-ceremony/
There are 14 people entrusted to perform this ceremony, and at least three must be present at each performance. The keys are stored at two facilities, and the attendees need to show government ID to enter them (is the government that issued the ID trustworthy? Do you trust the guards to verify it? Ugh, my head hurts).
Further access to the facility is controlled by biometric locks (do you trust the lock maker? How about the person who registers the permitted handprints?). Everyone puts a wet signature in a logbook. A staffer has their retina scanned and presents a smartcard.
Then the staffer opens a safe that has a “tamper proof” (read: “tamper resistant”) hardware module whose manufacturer is trusted (why?) not to have made mistakes or inserted a back-door. A special laptop (also trusted) is needed to activate the safe’s hardware module. The laptop “has no battery, hard disk, or even a clock backup battery, and thus can’t store state once it’s unplugged.” Or, at least, the people in charge of it claim that it doesn’t and can’t.
The ceremony continues: the safe yields a USB stick and a DVD. Each of the trusted officials hands over a smart card that they trust and keep in a safe deposit box in a tamper-evident bag. The special laptop is booted from the trusted DVD and mounts the trusted USB stick. The trusted cards are used to sign three months worth of keys, and these are the basis for the next quarter’s worth of secure DNS queries.
All of this is published, videoed, livestreamed, etc. It’s a real “defense in depth” situation where you’d need a very big conspiracy to subvert all the parts of the system that need to work in order to steal underlying secrets. Yes, bottom line, you’re still trusting people, but in part you’re trusting them not to be able to all keep a secret from the rest of us.
The process for determining which CAs are trusted by your browser is a lot less transparent and, judging from experience, a lot less thorough. Many of these CAs have proven to be manifestly untrustworthy over the years. There was Diginotar, a Dutch CA whose bad security practices left it vulnerable to a hack-attack:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DigiNotar
Some people say it was Iranian government hackers, who used its signing keys to forge certificates and spy on Iranian dissidents, who are liable to arrest, torture and execution. Other people say it was the NSA pretending to be Iranian government hackers:
https://www.schneier.com/blog/archives/2013/09/new_nsa_leak_sh.html
In 2015, the China Internet Network Information Center was used to issue fake Google certificates, which gave hackers the power to intercept and take over Google accounts and devices linked to them (e.g. Android devices):
https://thenextweb.com/news/google-to-drop-chinas-cnnic-root-certificate-authority-after-trust-breach
In 2019, the UAE cyber-arms dealer Darkmatter — an aggressive recruiter of American ex-spies — applied to become a trusted Certificate Authority, but was denied:
https://www.reuters.com/investigates/special-report/usa-spying-raven/
Browser PKI is very brittle. By design, any of the trusted CAs can compromise every site on the internet. An early attempt to address this was “certificate pinning,” whereby browsers shipped with a database of which CAs were authorized to issue certificates for major internet companies. That meant that even though your browser trusted Crazy Joe’s Discount House of Certification to issue certs for any site online, it also knew that Google didn’t use Crazy Joe, and any google.com certs that Crazy Joe issued would be rejected.
But pinning has a scale problem: there are billions of websites and many of them change CAs from time to time, which means that every browser now needs a massive database of CA-site pin-pairs, and a means to trust the updates that site owners submit to browsers with new information about which CAs can issue their certificates.
Pinning was a stopgap. It was succeeded by a radically different approach: surveillance, not prevention. That surveillance tool is Certificate Transparency (CT), a system designed to quickly and publicly catch untrustworthy CAs that issue bad certificates:
https://www.nature.com/articles/491325a
Here’s how Certificate Transparency works: every time your browser receives a certificate, it makes and signs a tiny fingerprint of that certificate, recording the date, time, and issuing CA, as well as proof that the CA signed the certificate with its private key. Every few minutes, your browser packages up all these little fingerprints and fires them off to one or more of about a dozen public logs:
https://certificate.transparency.dev/logs/
These logs use a cool cryptographic technology called Merkle trees that make them tamper-evident: that means that if some alters the log (say, to remove or forge evidence of a bad cert), everyone who’s got a copy of any of the log’s previous entries can tell that the alteration took place.
Merkle Trees are super efficient. A modest server can easily host the eight billion or so CT records that exist to date. Anyone can monitor any of these public logs, checking to see whether a CA they don’t recognize has issued a certificate for their own domain, and then prove that the CA has betrayed its mission.
CT works. It’s how we learned that Symantec engaged in incredibly reckless behavior: as part of their test-suite for verifying a new certificate-issuing server, they would issue fake Google certificates. These were supposed to be destroyed after creation, but at least one leaked and showed up in the CT log:
https://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2017/03/google-takes-symantec-to-the-woodshed-for-mis-issuing-30000-https-certs/
It wasn’t just Google — Symantec had issued tens of thousands of bad certs. Worse: Symantec was responsible for more than a third of the web’s certificates. We had operated on the blithe assumption that Symantec was a trustworthy entity — a perfectly spherical cow of uniform density — but on inspection it was proved to be a sloppy, reckless mess.
After the Symantec scandal, browser vendors cleaned house — they ditched Symantec from browsers’ roots of trust. A lot of us assumed that this scandal would also trigger a re-evaluation of how CAs demonstrated that they were worth of inclusion in a browser’s default list of trusted entities.
If that happened, it wasn’t enough.
Yesterday, the Washington Post’s Joseph Menn published an in-depth investigation into Trustcor, a certificate authority that is trusted by default by Safari, Chrome and Firefox:
https://www.washingtonpost.com/technology/2022/11/08/trustcor-internet-addresses-government-connections/
Menn’s report is alarming. Working from reports from University of Calgary privacy researcher Joel Reardon and UC Berkeley security researcher Serge Egelman, Menn presented a laundry list of profoundly disturbing problems with Trustcor:
https://groups.google.com/a/mozilla.org/g/dev-security-policy/c/oxX69KFvsm4/m/etbBho-VBQAJ
First, there’s an apparent connection to Packet Forensics, a high-tech arms dealer that sells surveillance equipment to the US government. One of Trustcor’s partners is a holding company managed by Packet Forensics spokesman Raymond Saulino.
If Trustcor is working with (or part of) Packet Forensics, it could issue fake certificates for any internet site that Packet Forensics could use to capture, read and modify traffic between that site and any browser. One of Menn’s sources claimed that Packet Forensics “used TrustCor’s certificate process and its email service, MsgSafe, to intercept communications and help the U.S. government.”
Trustcor denies this, as did the general counsel for Packet Forensics.
Should we trust either of them? It’s hard to understand why we would. Take Trustcor: as mentioned, it has a “private” email service called “Msgsafe,” that claims to offer end-to-end encrypted email. But it is not encrypted end-to-end — it sends copies of its users’ private keys to Trustcor, allowing the company (or anyone who hacks the company) to intercept its email.
It’s hard to avoid the conclusion that Trustcor is making an intentionally deceptive statement about how its security products work, or it lacks the basic technical capacity to understand how those products should work. You’d hope that either of those would disqualify Trustcor from being trusted by default by billions of browsers.
It’s worse than that, though: there are so many red flags about Trustcor beyond the defects in Msgsafe. Menn found that that company’s website identified two named personnel, both supposed founders. One of those men was dead. The other one’s Linkedin profile has him departing the company in 2019.
The company lists two phone numbers. One is out of service. The other goes to unmonitored voicemail. The company’s address is a UPS Store in Toronto. Trustcor’s security audits are performed by the “Princeton Audit Group” whose address is a private residence in Princeton, NJ.
A company spokesperson named Rachel McPherson publicly responded to Menn’s article and Reardon and Egelman’s report with a bizarre, rambling message:
https://groups.google.com/a/mozilla.org/g/dev-security-policy/c/oxX69KFvsm4/m/X_6OFLGfBQAJ
In it, McPherson insinuates that Reardon and Egelman are just trying to drum up business for a small security research business they run called Appsecure. She says that Msgsafe’s defects aren’t germane to Trustcor’s Certificate Authority business, instead exhorting the researchers to make “positive suggestions for improving that product suite.”
As to the company’s registration, she makes a difficult-to-follow claim that the irregularities are due to using the same Panamanian law-firm as Packet Forensics, says that she needs to investigate some missing paperwork, and makes vague claims about “insurance impersonation” and “potential for foul play.”
Certificate Authorities have one job: to be very, very, very careful. The parts of Menn’s story and Reardon and Egelman’s report that aren’t disputed are, to my mind, enough to disqualify them from inclusion in browsers’ root of trust.
But the disputed parts — which I personally believe, based on my trust in Menn, which comes from his decades of careful and excellent reporting — are even worse.
For example, Menn makes an excellent case that Packet Forensics is not credible. In 2007, a company called Vostrom Holdings applied for permission for Packet Forensics to do business in Virginia as “Measurement Systems.” Measurement Systems, in turn, tricked app vendors into bundling spyware into their apps, which gathered location data that Measurement Systems sold to private and government customers. Measurement Systems’ data included the identities of 10,000,000 users of Muslim prayer apps.
Packet Forensics denies that it owns Measurement Systems, which doesn’t explain why Vostrom Holdings asked the state of Virginia to let it do business as Measurement Systems. Vostrom also owns the domain “Trustcor.co,” which directed to Trustcor’s main site. Trustcor’s “president, agents and holding-company partners” are identical to those of Measurement Systems.
One of the holding companies listed in both Trustcor and Measurement Systems’ ownership structures is Frigate Bay Holdings. This March, Raymond Saulino — the one-time Packet Forensics spokesman — filed papers in Wyoming identifying himself as manager of Frigate Bay Holdings.
Neither Menn nor Reardon and Egelman claim that Packet Forensics has obtained fake certificates from Trustcor to help its customers spy on their targets, something that McPherson stresses in her reply. However, Menn’s source claims that this is happening.
These companies are so opaque and obscure that it might be impossible to ever find out what’s really going on, and that’s the point. For the web to have privacy, the Certificate Authorities that hold the (literal) keys to that privacy must be totally transparent. We can’t assume that they are perfectly spherical cows of uniform density.
In a reply to Reardon and Egelman’s report, Mozilla’s Kathleen Wilson asked a series of excellent, probing followup questions for Trustcor, with the promise that if Trustcor failed to respond quickly and satisfactorily, it would be purged from Firefox’s root of trust:
https://groups.google.com/a/mozilla.org/g/dev-security-policy/c/oxX69KFvsm4/m/WJXUELicBQAJ
Which is exactly what you’d hope a browser vendor would do when one of its default Certificate Authorities was credibly called into question. But that still leaves an important question: how did Trustcor, who marketed a defective security product, whose corporate ownership is irregular and opaque with a seeming connection to a cyber-arms-dealer, end up in our browsers’ root of trust to begin with?
Formally, the process for inclusion in the root of trust is quite good. It’s a two-year vetting process that includes an external audit:
https://wiki.mozilla.org/CA/Application_Process
But Daniel Schwalbe, CISO of Domain Tools, told Menn that this process was not closely watched, claiming “With enough money, you or I could become a trusted root certificate authority.” Menn’s unnamed Packet Forensics source claimed that most of the vetting process was self-certified — that is, would-be CAs merely had to promise they were doing the right thing.
Remember, Trustcor isn’t just in Firefox’s root of trust — it’s in the roots of trust for Chrome (Google) and Safari (Apple). All the major browser vendors were supposed to investigate this company and none of them disqualified it, despite all the vivid red flags.
Worse, Reardon and Egelman say they notified all three companies about the problems with Trustcor seven months ago, but didn’t hear back until they published their findings publicly on Tuesday.
There are 169 root certificate authorities in Firefox, and comparable numbers in the other major browsers. It’s inconceivable that you could personally investigate each of these and determine whether you want to trust it. We rely on the big browser vendors to do that work for us. We start with: “Assume the browser vendors are careful and diligent when it comes to trusting companies on our behalf.” We assume that these messy, irregular companies are perfectly spherical cows of uniform density on a frictionless surface.
The problem of trust is everywhere. Vaccine deniers say they don’t trust the pharma companies not to kill them for money, and don’t trust the FDA to hold them to account. Unless you have a PhD in virology, cell biology and epidemiology, you can’t verify the claims of vaccine safety. Even if you have those qualifications, you’re trusting that the study data in journals isn’t forged.
I trust vaccines — I’ve been jabbed five times now — but I don’t think it’s unreasonable to doubt either Big Pharma or its regulators. A decade ago, my chronic pain specialist told me I should take regular doses of powerful opioids, and pooh-poohed my safety and addiction concerns. He told me that pharma companies like Purdue and regulators like the FDA had re-evaluated the safety of opioids and now deemed them far safer.
I “did my own research” and concluded that this was wrong. I concluded that the FDA had been captured by a monopolistic and rapacious pharma sector that was complicit in waves of mass-death that produced billions in profits for the Sackler family and other opioid crime-bosses.
I was an “opioid denier.” I was right. The failure of the pharma companies to act in good faith, and the failure of the regulator to hold them to account is a disaster that has consequences beyond the mountain of overdose deaths. There’s a direct line from that failure to vaccine denial, and another to the subsequent cruel denial of pain meds to people who desperately need them.
Today, learning that the CA-vetting process I’d blithely assumed was careful and sober-sided is so slapdash that a company without a working phone or a valid physical address could be trusted by billions of browsers, I feel like I did when I decided not to fill my opioid prescription.
I feel like I’m on the precipice of a great, epistemological void. I can’t “do my own research” for everything. I have to delegate my trust. But when the companies and institutions I rely on to be prudent (not infallible, mind, just prudent) fail this way, it makes me want to delete all the certificates in my browser.
Which would, of course, make the web wildly insecure.
Unless it’s already that insecure.
Ugh.
Image:
Curt Smith (modified)
https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Sand_castle,_Cannon_Beach.jpg
CC BY 2.0:
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/deed.en
[Image ID: An animated gif of a sand-castle that is melting into the rising tide; through the course of the animation, the castle gradually fills up with a Matrix-style 'code waterfall' effect.]
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[MANN CO. WEBSITE FORUM THREAD #137 - POSTED BY SPY AT 3 PM TODAY]
Spy: Does anyone know why opening the official website app causes any and all background music to stop playing? It’s frustrating.
REPLIES -
Engineer: I think it’s because Saxton Hale really wants people to watch those livestreams he’s been doing. The website stops background music to stop playing so the livestreams will auto play.
Scout: well that’s fucked
Sniper: the last time I tuned into one of those livestreams it was just him crying in a dark room by himself
Demoman: wAIT EH!?!
Pyro: 😔💀
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Endgame (Chapter Two)
Summary: Armed with coordinates and a solid battle plan, the Avengers hunt Thanos down in the hopes of retrieving all six Infinity Stones to bring the Vanished back, but are quickly met with a shocking discovery.
Pairing: Steve Rogers X Reader
Word Count: 2.1k
Warnings/Disclaimers: None
A/N: This chapter’s on the shorter side but if you know what’s about to happen then you already know why (obligatory heads-up for sadness and angst in this one lol) Thank you for reading, I hope you all enjoy!
Chapter Two (Previous Chapter)
“Looks like you’re one of the ones with an added leg-up on this mission, hot-shot,” Natasha commented, casting a wary glance over at the towering Benatar while they waited for Rocket and Nebula to finish up their last-minute repairs to the spacecraft. “I’ve done a whole lot of things as a Black Widow, a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent and an Avenger, but I can’t say that I’ve ever traveled through space before.”
(Y/N) cracked a small smile as she fastened the last of her Asgardian armor over her new tactical suit. “Well, imagine you’re on the world’s fastest roller-coaster in the middle of a kaleidoscope and that kaleidoscope is trapped in a 9.5 magnitude earthquake, and that’s sort of what it’s like. Oh, and there’s a slight chance that you might pass out; that’s what happened to us after we escaped Sakaar and traveled to-” As she spoke, Natasha shuddered and Steve’s face paled, so she thought it best to quickly backtrack her words. “That’s only when you’re traveling through a jump-point, though! Normal space travel’s just like flying in a Quinjet or a helicopter, only the view is much prettier than anything you might see here on Earth and spaceships are a hell of a lot safer than a damn helicopter.”
“When I was a little kid, I always used to daydream about going to space…” The super-soldier sighed as he tugged his finger-less gloves on, the sorrow filling his features telling her that he was thinking about Carina. “Never thought that something like this would finally get me there.”
“Ship’s ready, humies!” Rocket announced across the manicured lawn of the Avengers Facility. “We just gonna stand around staring at each other all day or what?”
(Y/N) rolled her eyes at the raccoon’s attitude but followed Natasha and Steve as they boarded the Benatar for the first time. The trio took their seats in the second row of the spacecraft’s roomy flight deck, sitting in front of Rhodes and Thor and behind Rocket and Carol while Bruce and Nebula were seated on the lower level; for the first time in three weeks, the Asgardian didn’t look away when (Y/N)’s gaze met his and judging by the hint of a smile he gave her, he was feeling confident in their plan to acquire the Infinity Stones from Thanos and bring the Vanished back.
The spacecraft’s engines roared to life and once all of them fastened themselves into their seat harnesses, Rocket piloted them off the ground and up through the skies towards the planet’s upper atmosphere. Noticing how both Steve and Natasha were tensing up in nervous anticipation, (Y/N) nudged their shoulders and rested her hands palms-up on their shared armrests in an open invitation; the spy immediately latched onto her hand without taking her eyes off the flight deck’s viewport ahead but Steve was slower, tightly threading their fingers together and bringing their joined hands up to kiss the exposed skin above her engagement ring. They shared a knowing look before glancing over at Carol as she remarked with a reassuring smile, “Trust me, you get used to it.”
“Easy for you to say, Danvers, you glow and fly around shooting plasma bolts out of your fists for a living…” Natasha grumbled under her breath and (Y/N) bit back a smirk of amusement.
When Earth began to grow smaller through the flight deck’s viewports, Rocket turned around in his seat to address all of them. “Okay, who here hasn’t been to space?” Steve, Natasha and Rhodes all raised their hands. “You better not throw up on my ship.”
“Approaching jump in three…” Nebula called out as Steve’s hand gripped (Y/N)’s with a bruising force. “…two…” Natasha held her breath and braced herself against the back of her seat. “…one!”
The Benatar shot through the jump-point at breakneck speed and they were encased in swirling shades of blue and purple, speeding through space so quickly that all the stars around them appeared as fleeting streaks of white light. (Y/N) glanced over at Steve in time to watch his azure eyes widen in awe and despite the seriousness of their situation, she felt herself smile at the endearing sight. The moment they exited the jump-point at their final destination, however, her smile fell; the spacecraft hovered in orbit before the orange-colored planet where Thanos intended on living out the rest of his days, happy and satisfied in the knowledge that his plan to balance the universe had succeeded. He won’t be happy for very much longer, she thought as her jaw clenched tight, not if we have anything to say about it.
“That’s my cue.” Carol unclasped her seat harness and disappeared into the bowels of the Benatar; moments later, she appeared outside of the spacecraft and her voice spoke through their comm links. “I’ll head down for recon.” The captain flew off towards the tranquil planet while the rest of them finished planning and preparing for their impending fight with the Mad Titan.
(Y/N) had gotten up to help Natasha reboot the newly-repaired Hulkbuster armor for Bruce and was in the middle of adjusting her worn golden-yellow cloak when she saw Steve staring down at the familiar faded photograph of Peggy Carter pasted into the lid of his old compass; several years ago, she would’ve felt a pang of jealousy at the sight but now that she was older and their relationship had matured, she understood Steve’s connection to the remarkable woman and that there was nothing to feel insecure about. Throughout her groundbreaking life, Peggy Carter always seemed to know just what to do and if (Y/N) were being honest, she’d give just about anything to hear Peggy’s advice if it meant they’d win against Thanos and succeed in bringing everyone they’d lost back.
Natasha, who also noticed Steve and the weathered compass clutched tight in his hand, pursed her lips as her green eyes filled with sympathy. “This is gonna work, Steve.”
“I know it will.” After a moment, Steve closed the compass lid and looked up at the spy, the barest hint of fear in his gaze and a wavering edge to his voice as he continued. “Because I don’t know what I’m gonna do if it doesn’t.”
(Y/N) crossed over to where her fiancé sat and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pressing a kiss onto his jaw before nuzzling into his neck and listening to his steady heartbeat. “I promise that whatever happens down there, sweetheart, you won’t have to face it alone.” She tightened her hold on him as he leaned into her embrace. “I love you.”
Steve sighed and maneuvered his head so he could kiss her lips. “I love you too, sunshine.”
“No satellites, no ships, no armies…” Carol’s voice announced through their comms and they all turned toward the spacecraft’s viewport to see her fly up to it. “No ground defenses of any kind. It’s just him.”
(Y/N) and Steve exchanged a look as Nebula’s raspy voice filled the flight deck. “And that’s enough.”
The Benatar’s thrusters activated and Rocket piloted the spacecraft down through the planet’s upper atmosphere and into its clear blue sky littered with snow-white clouds; it was a tranquil planet, covered in trees and grass and peppered with stunning waterfalls of crystal-clear water, and (Y/N)’s blood boiled in rage at the thought of Thanos retiring to somewhere so beautiful after committing such heinous atrocities throughout the entire universe. The raccoon landed the spacecraft behind a dense forest of trees, out of sight of Thanos’ small hillside farm but close enough to journey there on foot, and they wasted no time, gathering their weapons and making their way through the trees towards their destination.
“Nice retirement project.” Once their group stopped by the trees bordering Thanos’ crops, Carol squared her shoulders and turned to face them as her body began to glow with cosmic energy. “Let’s pay this loser a visit, shall we?”
Carol shot off into the sky and blasted her way into the Mad Titan’s spacious farmhouse while Rhodes and Bruce followed in their respective armored suits; the sounds of battle echoed throughout the once-silent farm as all three heroes worked to restrain Thanos, and the rest of them began making their way up the path to the farmhouse. Once Rhodes gave him the signal through the comms, Thor burst into the farmhouse and Thanos bellowed in pain as the Asgardian severed his gauntlet-clad arm off with Stormbreaker.
(Y/N) exchanged an anxious look with Natasha and gripped her blaster’s shoulder strap as they followed Steve up the steps and into the farmhouse; inside, Thanos was kneeling on the floor and being restrained by Carol and Rhodes, while Bruce held him at repulsor-point and Thor brandished his blood-soaked battle axe. Rocket was the first to reach the severed arm but froze in shock when he flipped the heavy limb over to reveal six empty settings where the Infinity Stones once rested. “Oh, no.”
(Y/N)’s heart jolted in her chest and she glanced up to meet Steve’s eyes, an unsettling feeling beginning to form in the pit of her stomach; her emotions were reflected in her fiancé’s face but he did his best to bury them as he turned to face Thanos. “Where are they?”
When Thanos didn’t immediately answer, Carol’s glowing arm tightened around his neck. “Answer the question.”
“The universe required correction. After that, the stones served no purpose beyond temptation.”
“You murdered trillions!”
Bruce shoved the Mad Titan across the room, where he landed hard on the ground and spat out, “You should be grateful!” The Hulkbuster’s metal fist slammed into his charred purple face and stopped him from saying anything more.
Natasha’s green eyes shone with unshed tears and her voice shook as she took a step closer to Thanos and repeated Steve’s question. “Where are the stones?”
“Gone. Reduced to atoms.”
With her panic steadily rising, (Y/N) impulsively slung her blaster’s strap off her shoulder and aimed the weapon directly at Thanos’ smirking face, unbothered by the sudden threat of violence she found herself displaying. “We know you used the stones two days ago, so tell us where they are. Now.”
“I used the stones to destroy the stones. It nearly killed me, but the work is done…it always will be.” Her blood ran cold as the Mad Titan’s self-satisfied smirk widened, obviously relishing in their growing dread as they realized what had happened. “I am…inevitable.”
Hot tears formed in (Y/N)’s eyes as he repeated the same words he spoke to her back in Wakanda and she forced herself to look away, her knuckles tightening painfully around her blaster and her breath coming out in uneven puffs while all around her, the others were struggling to grapple with the seriousness of their situation. “W-We have to tear this place apart, he has to be lying-”
“My father is many things,” Nebula interrupted Rhodes’ rambling, her gaze trained on Thanos as a grim expression overtook her features. “A liar is not one of them.”
There was a subtle shift in Thanos’ demeanor and he looked up at his adoptive daughter with an emotion akin to pride written across his face. “Thank you, daughter. Perhaps I treated you too harshly.”
The sudden sound of Stormbreaker slicing through the air barely made (Y/N) flinch, her body entirely numb as she watched the Mad Titan’s decapitated head roll across the farmhouse’s floor. The others were in various states of shock, with a horrified Rocket being the only one to break the heavy silence engulfing the room. “What did you do?”
“I went for the head…” Thor replied, his voice shaking with grief and his eyes filling with tears. Without looking at any of them, the defeated Asgardian turned and walked out into the field of crops, his bloody battle axe still clutched tight in his hand.
Nebula, with the blood of her adoptive father speckled across her face, knelt down beside his severed head and closed his vacant eyes. Natasha and Rhodes were crying silent tears while Rocket sat on the farmhouse’s steps and buried his face in his hands, and both Carol and Bruce were at a loss for words as they stood and stared at Thanos’ body. (Y/N) hadn’t realized that her blaster was still raised until Steve’s hands came into view and gently pulled the weapon out of her bruising grip; her own hands were trembling as she covered her mouth and her shoulders shook with suppressed sobs, the feel of the super-soldier’s arms wrapping around her waist from behind proving to be the final straw. (Y/N) spun around and buried her face into Steve’s chest, her muffled cries echoing throughout the farmhouse as his own tears dampened her hair.
Steve held her against him even when her legs lost their strength but no matter how tight his grip on her was, there was nothing he could do to prevent her heart from shattering as she grappled with the knowledge that they’d lost. Their friends – some of the only family that either of them had – and their own daughter were truly gone forever, all because of Thanos.
“I am…inevitable.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: I mean...you know I had to do it, right?? Lol at least we all know that things will eventually get happier for them both! Thank you all so much for reading and commenting! I’ve created a Spotify playlist inspired by this series, and I’ll be updating it every time I upload a new chapter. Enjoy!
Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5L6MERx3PIydW3FyNPqYvl?si=6e6119bc3e8b49d0
Chapter Three
“Endgame” Masterlist
Tagging: @mrs-obrien @lahoete @awkward117 @cminr @natdrunk @momc95 @savedbystyle @miraculouscloud @awkwardnesshabitat @marinettepotterandplagg @mangosandmimosas @supersouthy @benakenalove @brooke0297 @hufflepeople @becausewelie @outoftheregular @junipermurdock @ladydmalfoy @mads-weasley @username23345 @crist1216 @capswife @lilmschild @avngrsinitiative @crowleysqueenofhell @y-napotat @mary1raven @groovy-lady @ljej95 @innersublimefury
#stumblin' in#steve rogers x reader#captain america x reader#steve rogers#captain america#natasha romanoff#black widow#carol danvers#captain marvel#thor odinson#james rhodes#war machine#nebula#rocket raccoon#bruce banner#hulk#tony stark#iron man#pepper potts#thanos#marvel cinematic universe
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Honestly though between AI discourse, fearmongering about basically every TOS change on every website ever, people noticing how alarming various levels of datamining are but not realizing how widespread it is and blaming all those things on singular websites, and so much more...holy fucking shit the level of computer and internet illiteracy in a population that is now so dependent on the internet is absolutely unconscionable and needs to be recognized as a MASSIVE societal failing.
"Did you know this website's TOS says they can use images you upload for ANY commercial purpose FOREVER? omg take all your stuff down NOW and stay safe!" They NEED to claim that right to display your work on a commercial website that intends to build new features over time in the first place. Fortunately for you, they know they'd lose a LOT of consumer trust if they suddenly opened up a marketplace that gave no money back to creators or otherwise started selling it and claiming all the money for themselves, because yeah, in this corporate hellscape, they probably WOULD if they could!
"I didn't consent to you scraping my image data for the 'more like this' function!" Yes you did, that's in the TOS that you didn't read, and even if you didn't Google would be doing it anyway as long as it's publicly available because legally no one can stop them.
"I can't believe they're not letting us block search engines from indexing our profiles now, only letting us discourage them, what an evil thing of this website to do!" That's all you were able to do in the first place. If it is publicly available, there is no way to block it from being indexed. Most search engines respect do-not-index requests - in fact, it's in their own best interest to do so for both consumer trust AND saving computing power - but legally and technologically there is no way to stop a webcrawler from just looking at those flags and going "how about I do anyway?" short of login-walling it or otherwise making it unavailable to the general public.
"Oh wow these geoguessr guys are impressive!" And terrifying. They should serve as a very valuable reminder to be extremely careful with what shows up in the backgrounds of your photos. You don't want to get doxxed just because someone thought it'd be cool to show off their nifty skills, especially if you're a marginalized person in any way.
"This website's TOS says they'll turn you over to the cops, never work with these evil bootlickers!" They are actually required to comply with warrants and subpoenas or else face the consequences for what YOU do themselves, and they don't know you from Adam, so why would they??? Don't use public commercial websites to talk about doing illegal shit if you don't want to get caught??? Some platforms can protect themselves by not keeping logs TO turn over in the first place (many of the better VPNs, for instance, have this as a selling point), but those have their own unique risks and it STILL doesn't protect you from people recognizing your photos or cross-platform username or other info and tracing it to platforms that DO keep logs. Yes, there are some companies that are worse than others - Facebook, for example, is notorious for volunteering info to the cops even when no one asked and the crime committed was to save a life, because they're fucking awful - but this is something you should EXPECT.
"Look at all these permissions that this platform demands! What are they doing with that!?" Yeah, it IS horrifying, now realize that none of that is unique to that platform. No, none of it is unique to Twitter, or Threads, or Bluesky, or TikTok - and the latter of which is ESPECIALLY not an excuse to pull out some racist conspiracy theories about Evil Chinamen Spying On Us Through Our Poor Innocent Youths. It is the result of 20+ years of boiling the frog when it comes to end user data protection. It's why the word "spyware" went from being a description of something we widely knew was bad to a word that old farts (like me I fucking GUESS) yell at clouds because it describes the majority of the modern internet and hardly anyone fucking notices or cares. It's only likely to get worse if shit like KOSA passes. You SHOULD be mad - but not at any one specific platform...except maybe Facebook. Arguably. Not necessarily because they're worse than any other (though they are worse than average), but because they are the one that normalized this shit.
Genuinely, I want to take this moment to call for anyone who has been disturbed by something like this to please, PLEASE, take a brief break from Posting until you take a moment to read up just a LITTLE bit on internet safety and infosec, because this entire situation with these kinds of expectations being so widespread is...not good.
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thread of some of my scout hcs, thoughts on his personality and little miscellaneous tidbits!
starting off strong by saying that i think he's very emotionally intelligent. knows when his loved ones are upset and will set about doing whatever he can to cheer them up. he defaults to trying to make you laugh since that's what he thinks he's best at, though!
cant always offer the Sagely Advice that one might get from spy, but he'll tell you whats on his mind and what he thinks of the situation. won't mince words; if he disagrees with you, he'll tell you Directly... but Gently. "Uhhh, dunno if i agree with that. think of it this way.."
maybe the last person you'd think to have a heart to heart with, but he might surprise you! he's a good listener and while he prefers to do things while talking (throwing a ball against a wall, pacing, etc), you've got 150% of his attention if the subject matter is serious!
competitive, but more likely to let others win than he is to Rub It In when He wins. battlefield smacktalk to the enemy is one thing, but Some People (not naming names) are VERY sore losers (sniper) so scout's content to botch a few billiards shots if it means that his friend is having fun! :)
cries. only when hes alone! feels like he has to have a good cry now and then to get everything out and to "emotionally reset". doesn't think crying is Girly/Weak or w/e, but he still doesn't like doing it around others. "okay, needed that. shake it off, scout, you're all good!"
VERY scrappy. resourceful through street smarts/intuition as opposed to technical know-how. tenacious and a total wildcard! that said, he won't be argumentative for no reason; he'll listen to any orders that engie or solly put down, but not without giving his input, asked for or not!
part of being a good scrapper is knowing when to fight and when to take a walk. when scout's truly mad, he prefers being alone, drawing or going on a run to get his thoughts clear. not afraid to ask for help and is always ready to "repay" friends for their kindnesses towards him.
growing up, he never wanted to trouble his mom with anything. scout was always the reliable one (although a complete hellion), often putting his own priorities to the side for his mom. places a lot of weight on his own shoulders to be good, or better, for her, and to be a son she can be proud of!
cannot drive. engineer has tried to teach him, sniper has tried, spy has tried, heavy has tried... but he just can't do it LOL. crashes into something every time and is always like CRAP!! SORRYSORRYSORRYSORRYSORRY!! it's not a big deal, though. plenty of the mercs enjoy driving after all!
he was always taught to share, even though he kind of hates it! always hated being forced to share with his brothers as a kid. in his adult life, he doesn't Mind, but he prefers being able to choose when he does share. if he's splitting something with you, its a BIG deal!!
easily hands out apologies and doesn't like long-standing conflict. "lets just hash this crap out and move on already!" good at putting you on ice, but only if he needs time to think or gather his thoughts. the longest grudge he'd ever held was against his Absent Father...... spy! but their relationship begins to get better after the events of the comics. i could sincerely write a whole thread on Just their dynamics together!
ultimately i think scout hated His Absent Father for so long because it was just "Easier" to. but now that spy is There and Trying, well, scout can't really Hate Him. theres still a lot of "repairing" to do, and they aren't the Perfect Father And Son, but scout appreciates spy's effort and the sincerity of his explanation (once he hears it from spy and not tom jones)!
will always value the truth over lies. he'd rather you tell him something Horrible if it was the truth than sugarcoat it with a lie. i think spy wanted to give scout what he wanted when he was dying (being comforted by his "dad"), but in retrospect when scout learns the truth, he wished spy would have just been honest with him, even if it did suck to know that his dad was someone like spy and not actually tom jones. regardless, he understood that spy just wanted to give scout what he thought scout wanted, but understands/respects scout's wishes going forward and promises to be a little more honest :) this is when they can really start repairing and Building on their relationship as father and son, in the ways that work for both spy and scout!
i don't think Dad Issues is the only facet of scout's personality nor do i think it even Dominates a lot of his thoughts BUT i just happen to have a lot of thoughts on it lmao
i don't think any of the other mercs Baby him (he's literally a Grown Man and imo being babied would piss him off), and i don't think any of them think he is "inferior" or "childish". i think all of the mercs are at least a little immature!
However i will say that i think a very interesting dynamic between scout and sniper is their views on their fathers and how it shaped them as people. while "jealousy" sounds a bit dramatic, i think they Lightly Envy one another; wouldn't ever take it out on each other but if they think about it for too long they kind of get Bummed Out. scout loves his family but sometimes wishes he'd been an only child with a Mom and a Dad that were around all the time. he doesnt know the Extent of snipers Complicated Feelings about his own family!
sniper loves his family too but sometimes thinks about how even though his own father was Present in his life, he'd been Very Hard on him and Basically rejected him. sniper was present while spy was comforting Dying Scout and took notice of how spy treated scout the way that he thought scout would want, disregarding his own feelings. sniper's dad, on the other hand, only told him he was proud of him after he'd technically died... ouch!
and No i Don't Think sniper wants spy to be his dad nor does he see/want to see spy as a/his own father figure in any capacity lol. i think this is just something that crosses both sniper and scout's minds every now and then and they're like "Huh. Wish I Had What He'd Had!"
i don't see scout struggling with internalized homphobia or anything like that, either. i think his mom, like scout (and spy!), says what they mean and mean what they say and when scout's mom says "i love you no matter what", she means it! scout never gives that kind of stuff a second thought; if he brings a Fella home for the holidays, it doesn't matter! scout's mom is still going to show his Date Of Choice all of the most embarrassing photos of scout she can find! x)
holds his liquor well; he came from a big cathoIic family after all! x) gets a little more Snarky and a little more Hostile if he gets Truly Drunk, but doesn't like to make himself go that far Often. he can always brawl with the mercs when he's sober! prefers to have some beers with demo, engie and sniper and play darts or billiards with them. doesn't like mixed drinks. freakin gross!
will break your balls over anything and everything (like spy and scout's mom!). you tripped on the field? hell tease you for a week! nothing ever mean-spirited and not about anything that he thinks would Upset you! if you ask him to stop, he will, and he'll apologize and mean it!
#dutchfoolery#mercthreads#<- if u wanna see my other Merc Thoughts go here.. hehe#dutchiehcs#tf2#scout
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Two Threads, One Stitch
read it on the AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/54716167
by B0N3D
The Sniper was young, awkward, and didn't know exactly what he was getting into even as he took the next train to a sleepy little farm town called Harvest. He couldn't go back home by this point and, frankly, didn't want to. The job he applied for gave him more opportunity than most in getting paid well off, and he'd stick firmly by it so long as it stayed that way to support his folks back home.
Unbeknownst to the Sniper, however, more problems than the simpler ones he encountered back in Australia would arise after his arrival. Problems that would domino, crash, and echo throughout the longevity of his future with Mann Co. until its very end...
**(Due to my shared universe with Hajime Haga, mentions of their characters from Severed & Splintered will be made in this fic)
Words: 4549, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English
Fandoms: Team Fortress 2
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Categories: M/M, Other
Characters: Spy (Team Fortress 2), Sniper (Team Fortress 2), Engineer (Team Fortress 2), Medic (Team Fortress 2)
Relationships: Sniper/Spy (Team Fortress 2), Engineer/Medic (Team Fortress 2)
Additional Tags: not canon characters, Respawn Mechanics (Team Fortress 2), Trans Spy (Team Fortress 2), Angst and Feels, Complicated Relationships, Questioning Sniper, Bisexual Spy (Team Fortress 2), Gay Medic, Gay Engineer, Explicit Language, Canon-Typical Violence, Betrayal, Drama, Plot heavy with twists and turns, Mann Co. (Team Fortress 2), Slow Burn, Severed & Splintered (Team Fortress 2), Shared Universe, Manipulation, Severed & Splintered
read it on the AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/54716167
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