#the blurbs jar

[ubejamjar]

☆ Common Ground ☆

A little interaction I imagined between my WoL who loves dead civilizations a little too much and a literal fossil living, breathing primary source. Word Count: 311

By the time Ajisai finishes copying the murals in her journal, her friends are long gone. It's an obsession really. Ever since her first visit to the floating ruins of Nym, she’s had a hunger for ancient civilizations that will never be satisfied. Nym, Amdapor, Mhach, the Allagan Empire— all of it fascinates her. Mostly it’s the stories of a people long gone she loves. How did they live? What did they eat? Was floating in the sky a matter of security or aesthetic? She refuses to admit she craves their knowledge, their power. “The hero has an affinity for the arts, I see,” Emet-Selch says. She forces herself to stay perfectly still, determined to not give him the satisfaction of startling her. “History, actually.” “And what is art, if not a reflection of history? A mirror to the soul of a civilization, capturing its highest highs and lowest lows?” Ajisai rolls her eyes; she isn't in the mood to debate philosophy.

It’s been a long day. After only a few seconds of silence, the Ascian sighs, “It was my hope that, bereft of your companions' interjections, we might engage in a more… fruitful exchange. Alas, it appears I afforded them too little credit.” Surely an eternal existence would teach a person patience. She hears his footsteps moving away. “Wait,” she says. The footsteps stop. Ajisai looks over her shoulder to make sure he’s still there. “Oh? Have another task you won't bother to thank me for completing?” His every word drips with sarcasm, "Well? Out with it then." She considers whether or not she actually wants this. I don’t want this, she decides, I need it. He knows a world I never will. I have to know. And though she will not say it out loud, she pities the man who lost everything. He just seems so… sad. “Tell me more about your world. Please.”

#I haven't shared writing much #it's fine #writingjar #ajisaijar #i feel like i should have a jar for these blurbs #i'll think about it later #ffxiv #ffxiv writing #feeling the urge to burn myself at the stake #ok i hit “post” now before I lose the nerve to do it #shb spoilers #spoilers

[jupitercomet]

also i can’t stop thinking about the scene where he was holding her while she was hysterically crying after hitting her head 😭

okay, excuse me while I—

warnings: blood, language, injury, mentions of a panic attack

Spending a large part of his adult life with three male roommates meant that Jake was used to injuries. Whether it was Javy’s various muscle pulls, or the time Mickey’s head went through the drywall, or the time Bradley got run over by a cyclist, Jake was used to the bleeding, screaming, and panicking that usually followed. In fact, Jake liked to think he was even desensitized to the whole thing. 

He was not. He decidedly was not.

Because your head hit the corner of his dresser with a sickening thunk and Jake felt his heart drop into his stomach. And he learned quickly that he was not at all used to the bleeding, screaming, and panicking that followed.

“Shit, peach!” He scrambled to squat in front of you, surveying the blood dripping down from your temple. From this distance, he couldn’t tell if you needed stitches or not.

Jake formulated a game plan in his head: get you out of his room, kick Caroline out, get you to a hospital. And he didn't allow himself to focus on anything else, because if he focused on anything else, then he'd be panicking too. Jake felt physically ill when you flinched away from his outreached hand.

“Hey,” he retracted it quickly, softening his voice in attempts to hide his own stress. “You’re okay. It’s just me, yeah? Jake.”

Your breaths were still quick, shallow intakes of air.

Jake managed a small smile, “I know, not Chris Evans. Sorry about that, peach.”

He reached for you again — much slower — and this time you let him. You were still bleeding profusely, worrying Jake further as it showed no real signs of stopping. Not that he could get much of a good look at it with your face buried in the crook of his neck and his focus set on grabbing his phone and entering the living room.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry! I was just wondering where you kept your forks.”

Jake had always thought he hated Caroline, but this, whatever he was feeling, this was worse. Far worse. Jake gritted his teeth, shifting to support you with one hand as he unlocked his phone and found Mickey’s contact in his favorites. He had other things to focus on than Caroline and her ability to give the writers of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend a run for their money. It took a creak of the floorboards for him finally to lose it.

“For the love of God, stay right there Caroline!” He sucked in a frustrated breath, the dial ring of Mickey not yet answering his phone stressing him further. “Just— Don’t fucking move, okay?”

Surprisingly, she listened and it seemed as though, for once, the universe did too, because Mickey answered his phone and was already in the car before Jake could finish explaining what happened, lifting one less pressure off of his shoulders. Bradley was a different story, but from his call he didn’t sound too lovesick — which meant he wasn’t too far gone yet. He did throw a curve ball in Jake’s plan though, because Jake knew he couldn’t take you to the hospital if it meant leaving Bradley alone with Caroline.

You were still crying and Jake couldn’t tell if it was from pain or shock. He was guessing a mix of both. It reminded him of the time his youngest sister had sprained her wrist roller skating. She'd cried for hours like her body couldn’t decide what emotion was more overwhelming so it just decided to combine them both.

Jake set you down on the couch carefully, crouching down in front of you. His thumb was tender on your skin as he held you in place and finally inspected your injury.

“I’m gonna be honest,” Jake looked at you solemnly. “I don’t think you’re gonna make it.”

Your lips quirked up slightly.

“I hope you’re okay looking like Frankenstein from now on,” Jake couldn’t stop his own smile from growing. “But I’m sure you'll pull it off, peach.”

“Frankenstein's Monster.”

Your quiet voice caused Jake to furrow his brows. “What?”

“It’s Frankenstein’s Monster. Frankenstein’s the scientist.”

Jake snorted incredulously, gently wiping a tear from your cheek. “How could you possibly still be a nerd at a time like this?”

You smiled again, before the expression erased itself with a wince and more tears began pooling in your eyes. “My head really hurts.”

“I know,” Jake frowned. “Mickey’ll be here soon to take you to the hospital.”

His words triggered another bout of shallow breaths. “You aren’t gonna come?”

Jake wanted to throw up at the broken waver in your voice and the look of anguish in your eyes. Maybe he could just take you to the hospital. Sure one night of Caroline would cause Bradley a shit ton of damage, but he’d taken care of that before, he could just do it later. No— He didn’t want her around you ever again.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I gotta deal with this before it gets worse.”

You seemed to nod in understanding, but any mood lifting Jake had accomplished had officially been squandered and you spent the rest of the time until Mickey arrived trying — and failing — to cry quietly into his chest.

Even Jake could admit that he threw away Caroline’s lasagna with far more force than necessary.

#tdbj— asks #the douche bag jar blurb #the douche bag jar

[hungry-m0th]

Updated jar of kinks!

#jar of kinks #i might turn this into a pinned post if i can think of a decent introduction blurb

[amoosarte]

𝐂𝐑𝐔𝐄𝐋 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐄𝐑 𝜗𝜚 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓

━━━ in which going to puerto rico to visit your girlfriends parents while her birthday week might lead to something exciting !

Mason was rather in love with his girlfriend—loving the fact she was way different from him made him feel like the most luckiest man in the world. She would make him try very new things and made him experience new feelings.

Carolina was definitely something he needed, and he absolutely adored her. She was in the UK because she was studying architect. When she first meet Mason, she knew right there she wanted to give it a try.

It was a month before March when Carolina’s parents called her on facetime and told her to come over for spring break, to celebrate her birthday.

At that moment Mason had walked into their shared bedroom and her parents saw. Her parent absolutely adored Mason, they loved him trying to embrace their culture and to bring their customs in to his home.

They talked, they brought the topic up and invited him, making him nod in excitement. Carolina looked at her boyfriend with no hope, he was rich and the only time he was in water was when he hung out on his yacht.

"mason, are you sure about this?" Carolina said packing her suitcase, she for the past hour watched Mason push swimming short into this suitcase, along with shirts, shorts, flip flops and other 'beach' necessary items.

"Lina! love, we agreed to do this!" Mason looked at her in disbelief, making her laugh. "Baby i just don't want you feel uncomfortable to the sudden change." Carolina pushed her feet up and pecked his lips, making him sigh and wrap his arms around her hips.

"Love I'm trying to make your family accept me, I wanna know everything about you, you already know everything about me, it's my turn now." He kissed her plum lips and made her smile.

"I will get to know every inch of you if i'm planning on putting a ring on your finger." Mason teased as Carolina laughed, feeling his tall body lean her in into the bed, kissing her neck.

he would survive, right?

Holy fuck, it was just barely Nine, in the morning and the sun was beaming hot on the tropical island, Mason applied some sunscreen and put his ray bans on, putting their luggage into a car.

The couple was finally on the beautiful childhood island where Caroline was born. "We are going to my home!" Carolina got behind the steering wheel and looked at her already cherry red boyfriend that was smiling at her.

Carolina laughed and applied some more sunscreen on Mason while pecking his lips, he smiled and kissed her back. "Let's go! I wanna see your mum!" He said laughing as Carolina started the tiny car. As they made their way into the little towns, Mason couldn't help but admire the fruit markets that were already crammed, the wild life that surrounded the car, then it was connected to the beach.

"Ugh I can't wait until my feet touch the water!" Carolina chipped happy, making Mason nod slowly, eyes not parting from the beach. They neared the house and Mason looked out his window as he saw the ocean waves go high then low.

He felt the waves make him relax, he sighed. He told her that she knew everything about him, yet he couldn’t tell her the most important thing about him. “You okay baby?” Carolina tapped his thigh as he flinched, looking at her.

No matter how long he would stare at her, he could never accept the fact he managed to be with someone as pretty as her. Her coconut color skin that provided the warmth he needed, making him melt when they touched. He just gave her a hearty smile and nodded “just happy.” He said making her smile.

It didn’t take long to arrive at her home, it was a pleasant two story house with the sides covered with greens and tropical plants. The small pathway was busy with a small car and a motorcycle, there was a beautiful iron double french door at the entrance. A cute little porch filled with some iron chairs that had flower designs, and a sun on the side of the door.

Very homey, making Carolina sighed in contentedness. "It didn't look like this when I was little, but after me and my brothers got jobs, we gave our parents some money to have it renovated." Carolina helped Mason get their suitcases to the front door. "It's like their retirement home." She pressed on the doorbell, making a little sound.

She heard a dog barking on the other side and it made her smile, Mason just watched her, admiring her. "Ya esta coco aqui!" Her mother's warm voice made her smile so much, she was squeezing Mason's hand.

The door opened and a lady with straight black hair and glasses came into view. Mason smiled because he had recognized her, it was Carolina's mother. "Hola mamita!" Carolina lead Mason inside, his eyes wandered admiring the swatch of colors around the house.

"Maíson!" This caught his attention, Mason smiled at the elder lady and gave her warm smile. "Hola!" His accent was wonky but it made the elder lady smile and laugh. "Let me get a good look of you." She stepped back and looked at the boy who stood very close to Carolina.

"You have very pretty eyes." She complimented him, making his face cherry red again. "y papa?" Carolina said, then her mother said something in spanish, leaving Mason clueless.

"You ready to meet my dad?" Carolina looked at Mason who had just focused his attention on her. "Your dad? do I look okay?" He said getting nervous, and she nodded. "You look handsome." She said making him laugh.

As they walked to the backyard, the stair were to right and there was a thin hallway that connected the dining room to kitchen. Mason saw many photos of Carolina as she grew up, many awards of many things, even a soccer one? They made it outside and it was a large porch, had a grill and to the side a glass table, around it was a white railing and stair that lead to a rock path to the beach.

Then a shed that had many pieces of wood scatters all over the places. "Papa makes surf boards, then sells them to tourist and people." Carolina whispered to Mason who just nodded.

"Javi, coco esta aqui!" Her mother yelled into the quiet shed making the man inside yell back. "Lali para de gritar me!" Her father yelled back, walking out to the sight of Mason holding his daughter's hand.

"Maison!" The man came off sweet, pulling him into a string hug. "How was the travel here?" Her father's accent was strong, his english was very good. "very tiring" he laughed a bit.

A very tiring 21 hour flight almost killed the couple, but ahead of time Mason got first class seats making them have a easy flight. "Well, Lali cleaned the room you'll be staying at, Coco can show you the way." He said as his wife gave them a heartwarming smile.

That's what Carolina did, leading Mason to the renovated second floor. "My room." Carolina sighed and flop on her bed making the boy look around her room, being in the room where his girlfriend grew up in was a different feeling.

"Mama, is going to make dinner soon, do you want to take a quick nap?" Carolina patted the empty side to her bed in which he quickly filled. "I thought you'd never ask." Mason opened her arms and shoved his way into her arms.

Soon the couple completed their first day.

Mason thought he could avoid it, avoid the ocean, but how can you avoid it when it's the main thing surrounding you?

Mason woke up to birds chirping right next to their window and Carolina's head on his chest. He melted to this feeling, it felt perfect, soon after he heard chatter of things downstairs and he felt the house become alive again.

"Morning." Carolina littered a ton of kisses on his chin as he sighed back into his pillow, rubbing his head on her hair. "I've never felt so relaxed until now." He muttered as they both stayed quiet on their bed.

"wanna shower together?" Carolina whispered to him as if it was a sin, making his pearly whites show. "You're making this morning even better." He said dragging her out of bed.

Her mother served him, a breakfast sandwich that a variety of fruits on the side. The atmosphere was on you see in beach movies, the nice sunlight slipping in, as the swatch of yellow, blue and whites all over the house.

After the hearty breakfast, Carolina took him to the markets, a whole stand full of fresh fruits, stand filled with snacks and things tourist would buy, Mason was acting like a kid, buying everything that catches his eye.

"This would look stunning on you!" He said grabbing a nice sundress he found at a store. "You can wear it on your birthday!" He said putting it in front of her, she looked at the dress then at Mason.

"I never knew you had this sense of fashion!" Carolina smiled and looked at the dress, it was a white sundress that had white buttons going down the middle. Simple but pretty.

They wander over to the swin area, Carolina wanted to look at the bathing suits, she was in desperate need of one. Over in the London weather was horrific, always gloomy and cold and there is barely any sun.

So you couldn't really go out for a swim, so she needed swimwear for today. "Mason, we will be swimming today! Brandon and Luis and their wives are coming today, papa is making bbq!" She looked over at her boyfriend that was rather quiet.

She thought nothing of it and continued to browse the section. Mason saw how lovely she looked, so he would have to suck it up and smile just for her.

As the evening got more calmer, the sun was also going down, creating some shade. "How do I look baby?" Carolina gave Mason a twirl of her cute little two set bathing suit.

A very thin see through white robe, covering her lightly. "wonderful, should i take it off of you?" Mason smiled and tugged her over towards him as she laughed.

"How flattering baby." Carolina applied sunscreen on him, not wanting him to get sunburned. "I don't wanna swim today.." Mason muttered as she rubbed it down to his shoulders. "why?" Carolina stopped and looked at his face.

It held an expression she knew so very well, his face was a 'i wanna say but it's embarrassing' expression. "Mason, what's up baby?" Carolina dropped everything and sat right next to him. He looked over at her and lied. "I just feel nasty today."

"Mason." Her voice was stern and held a warning tone, he groaned. His leg bounced up and down, he didn't want to be made fun off, especially in front of her family. "Mason, please tell me, I won't make fun of you, just talk to me about it?" Carolina said, making him sigh.

"I can't swim." Mason whispered making Carolina have a double take. "You can't what?" "I can't swim!" Mason said louder making her flinch. Mason looked away, out of embarrassment. She could see his ear get red and she knew he was embarrassed.

"Mason that's okay baby." Carolina said getting up and taking something out of her suitcase. Mason looked at her, she was holding an inflatable, it was an inflatable donut. "I bought this in london, now I can teach you to swim." She said.

So that's what they did, when the rest of her family came to get the beach site prepared, they were meet with the scene of Mason in the donut inflatable and holding Carolina's hands, kicking his feet. It looked like he was having the time of his life, letting the waves just push him up and down.

"That's it baby, keep kicking" Carolina was being patient with him, his continuous whining of fear of being drown coming up in every encouraging phrase. "Mason, have some confidence!"

"If you drown, I can save you!" Carolina laughed as he groaned and just let the water carry him away. This is the most he'd seen her laugh in a week, he could just feel her radiate her love towards him, and he loved it.

"Mason I love how cute you are." Carolina said holding onto the floaty, looking at Mason's hazel eyes. Mason looked like a fool in love, seeing Carolina as a god sent.

That's how he knew he was ready.

"Happy birthday dear Carolina! happy birthday to you!" Everyone in the restaurant sang as she blew out her candles, her brothers smashing some frosting on her nose.

Mason laughed as he wiped her nose clean, and he nodded over at her parents indicating it was time to show her his gift. Mason quickly stood up and went towards her. "What's up Mason?" He smiled and got down on one knee.

"Carolina Valenz Martinez, I am in love with you, everyday when I wake up with you by my side makes me feel grateful to live another day, you don't understand when I say, without you I wouldn't be someone new, you bring joy in my life, you bring feelings in that i've never felt before." Mason's eyes pricked with tears as he saw Carolina gasp.

The atmosphere got blurry and her eyes only focused on him, his face became the main thing she could focus. She could see the tears that pricked his eyes and felt them bubble in her eyes in well.

"- With you, my life becomes whole, with you my days become bright. In your hands I would love to lay, want to wake up in, want to die in. I can't imagine a future without you by my side, Carolina will you marry me?" Carolina looked into his hazel eyes she loved so very much and nodded.

"Yes, I will!" She jumped out of her seat the moment Mason put the ring on her finger and kissed him. Everyone clapped as they witness love blossom. Mason lifted her up and let a tear slip out, he finally had the thing he wanted most in his life.

masonmount ✓

❤︎ liked by cmpulisc, kaihaverts29, joaofelix79, debbiemount and 803,188 others...

masonmount✓ Carolina my love, I will cherish you until I grow old, and hopefully grow old with you. 🤍

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✉⋆ ˚｡ mentions ⋆୨୧˚ : @landitolover, @ch3rryknots , @moneygramhaas , @d6za1 !!

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#୧⋆｡🕯my stories!! #✉⋆ ˚｡mason mount!! ⋆୨୧˚ #꒰｡ › ·̮ ‹ ｡꒱mason jar!! #ᰔ mason + carolina #ᰔ love the english men #mason mount blurb #mason mount imagine #mason mount fluff #masin imagines #mason mount #man united #champions league #manchester united

[jamminvroomvroom]

hi babe i’m here from the dms but. speaking of brain rot, thinking abt fwb lando again where u stay the night after and wake up in the morning expecting him to be gone already for smth work related or what not but he’s still in bed absolutely clinging to u. and then more soft sleepy morning sex 🫠🫠

play pretend.

ln x fem!reader

in which it’s time to stop pretending…

just a little blurb to say…. HAPPY BIRTHDAY @lavenderlando !! sorry i made you wait like 6 months for this lmfao i love u girl, u mean the world to me and i hope this hits the spot 💖💖 lemme know what y’all think, more 4k requests will be worked on asap (it’s exam szn ew)

songs to set the mood: denial by james marriott, real love baby by father john misty, can i call you rose? by thee sacred souls

warnings: 18+!! minors go away! smut, morning sex, friends to lovers, best friend!reader, friends with benefits type relationship, fluff, unprotected sex (don’t be silly…)

1k words

cool air casts goosebumps over your bare skin, the open window letting in the morning breeze. you tug at the grey bedsheets, dragging them higher over your frame where you lay. you eyes are cracked open, hazily taking in the sight before you.

he’s still here.

you often expect lando to be gone when you wake up. sometimes it’s because of work, sometimes it’s because you’d promised not to do this again but alcohol had then rendered the both of you irresistible to the other, and it was too awkward to have yet another jarring conversation about how you’re such good friends.

but he’s there. and he’s looking at you.

“hi.” he croaks, soft and low. you revel in his morning voice on the rare occasions you get to hear it.

“hey.” you mumble, leaning in closer to him.

he pushes the duvet up and away, inviting you into his arms, and you wriggle towards him. he’s a human heater, and you’re cold, that’s the only reason you snuggle up, tucked between his arms.

“you’re still here.” you whisper into his chest, purposefully quiet, almost as if you don’t actually want him to hear you.

“couldn’t leave you.” he mutters quietly.

you crane your head to look up at him, eyes blown wide at the admission.

“why?”

“i hate leaving after.”

the ‘after’ hangs heavy in the air between you for a second. he’s eyeing up your lips and you’re returning the gesture, sleepy eyes flitting between his and his plush lips.

this never happens. usually, the night starts with too many drinks too quickly, progresses to his hands dropping dangerously low on your waist, leads to the pair of you mentally scarring an innocent taxi driver, and ends with you underneath him. or, on top of him. and then, he’s gone.

“for the record, i hate it when you go.” you reply, and the space between you dissipates. there are so many unsaid words being traded between you, an intense charge of energy. you’re anxiously sliding your hands up his sides, itching to feel impossibly closer.

“maybe i should stop going then, hm?” two of lando’s fingers grasp your chin, tilting it up to bump his.

“yeah.” you breathe.

it’s like he’s tugged an invisible string, and you’re melting into him, his lips slotting immaculately over yours, as if they were sculpted by god to rest against yours. he tastes familiar, it’s rare you get to kiss him sober and in the light of day. you bask in it, finding the messy, loose curls tickling the back of his neck, threading your fingers through the thick, brown strands. he groans, parting his mouth just enough for you to slide your tongue over his.

“want you. now.” you gasp urgently into the space where your lips part, your body rolling hungrily against his.

“i always want you, drives me crazy.” lando grunts, grabbing a handful of your ass and pulling you even closer.

lando slots his thigh between your legs, and you search for friction, rutting against him. you’re both naked from the blurry night before so you can feel everything, each part of him so ready for you. you’re slick for him already, can feel the way it’s painting your inner thighs. you hate how easy it is to lose yourself in him.

“take me then.” you whine, your forehead collapsing against his shoulder.

lando smirks, flipping you over so that your back is to his chest, like you’re nothing. he hooks your top leg over his, sliding himself closer to where you’re aching for him.

“can’t keep pretending.” lando whispers against the shell of your ear.

he slides deep, then, filling you to the hilt. it knocks the air out of you, your back arching at the sensation of him hitting every single spot that mattered.

“then let’s not pretend anymore.” you choke out, your head rolling back against his shoulder.

“yeah, baby? wanna be all mine?” he teases, thrusting deep and slow, the slide of him shooting pleasure over your body like the slow, satisfying drip of warm honey.

“already am, all yours.” you sigh, totally and utterly content as your nerve endings pulsed with pleasure.

“good girl.” lando praises, his voice fucked out and lovestruck.

as if he’s rewarding you for your admission, the pad of his finger slips down your navel, finding your clit. you’re soaked for him, wet and warm, and he traces circles into the bundle of nerves, each touch sending you keening back into him.

“so close.” you sound like you’re begging, pleading for him to let you finish all over him.

“gotta say please.” he nips the skin of your shoulder and you squirm, toes curling.

“please, lando.” you writhe, canting your hips back against him.

“sound so pretty for me.” he coos, peppering kisses down your neck.

his fingers speed up against your folds, working you perfectly to a sweet release. everything is still blurred by sleep, your body overly sensitive from the cool air pouring in through the window and the slumber still lodged in your bones.

“cum with me.” you slur, your eyes squeezing shut. you almost turn into him, convulsing in his arms to the point where you’d be staring into his stormy eyes if you could manage to pry yours open.

“let me see those eyes.” he commands, your entire body shuddering. you blink, staring up at him, and you both fold, meeting your ends. he looks fierce, starved, completely enamoured with every single way your face moves.

your jaw hangs agape, a choked cry stifled in the back of your throat. it’s all too much, and just about enough, huge, calloused hands roaming your body as your shake, spilling all over him.

“god.” you breathe, flopping limply against him. he stays buried inside of you, his face lost to the damp skin of the crook of your neck.

“i never would of left all those mornings if i knew this is the good morning i’d get.” lando laughs, the sound deep and wholesome. you cosy yourself up even closer to him.

“not letting you leave from now on.” you murmur, smiling to yourself when you feel his lips press against the back of your head.

“you couldn’t get rid of me if you tried.”

-

sorry this is soooo bad lmao i felt the urge to write something short n sweet xoxo

-

taglist

@boysthatgovroomvroom @welld0nebaku @thegirlinthefandoms @mcmuppet @japanesekel @vinvantae @ggaslyp1 @dr3lover @smiithys  @rachstash @infinitebells @fizzpopsnap101 @gaily19 @icecoldtires @mysticalnightenthusiast @thatchickwiththecamera @oyesmendes @disneydaydreameralways @canyouseethesainz @ferrarifwendvale @fcbformulaeri @tony-stank3 @maih23 @soleilgrec @carolineworld @anthonykatebridgerton @allywthsr @iamasimpingh0e @ophcelia @lovelynikol16 @coffeehurricanes @jennx03 @blueflorals @lqvesoph @sidcrosbyspuck @better-dead-than-smeg @buendiabebeta @pjofics @kovalcin @wintergilmore3 @for-writing-shit @youdontknowmeshh @im-an-overthinker @jule239 @darleneslane @jazzy722 @weasleyswizarding-wheezes @therealone4r @pleasecallmeunhinged @theonlyadrienne @spideylovin @formulaal

#lando norris #lando norris smut #lando norris x reader #lando norris x you #lando norris blurb #lando norris fic #lando norris imagine #lando norris fluff #f1 fic #f1 blurb #f1 smut #f1 driver x reader #f1 driver x you #formula 1 fic #formula 1 smut #formula 1 driver x you #lando norris oneshot #f1 oneshot

[2hightocare]

SNOW IMPRINTS ✷

“I’m grown, I’m not dipping my dick in the snow to compare dick sizes.”

Synopsis: What was supposed to be a family reunion, ends in comparing dick sizes.

Genre: established relationship! married au!

Pairings: DILF!Jungkook x fem!reader

Warnings: Jungkook being whipped as fuck, Jungkook being a girl dad! (Cute.) a lot of cussing, mentions of sex, mentions of consumption of alcohol, found family.. Jungkook is just such a cutesy dramatic baby!

a/n: hai… I disappeared for a bit but happy new year!! I read “unravel me” and it inspired me to write this super short blurb so enjoy Jungkook being a golden retriever husband. (Ignore all mistakes, wrote this while high) 🤍 Word count: 1.4k

“I’m literally the biggest DILF,” your husband starts again. Jungkook points to himself while Iseul giggles in his arms.

“If you don’t shut the fuc—“ Yoongi irks.

“No cussing!” You and all the wives jump in. A heavy sigh leaves your mouth because this is like the hundredth time you have told all the boys not to cuss when the kids are around. Not since what happened when you decided to babysit Ye joon.

“Jeon, get your ass in here!” You shout from the kitchen, hoping your husband can hear you from upstairs. You stare at the empty cookie jar you had refilled yesterday, and there was only one reason why they were gone.

“What, baby?! What’s wrong?” Jungkook runs down the stairs with Iseul in one hand and Ye joon in the other. The two babies laugh at the bouncing. “Did you eat all the cookies!?” You glare at Jungkook, your hands on your hips as your husband looks everywhere but your eyes.

“Actually… Taehyung stole some when he left Ye joon.” He explains as if that would change anything. Knowing Jungkook for ten years, you know damn well Taehyung maybe took three cookies and the other fifty Jungkook ate them.

“No more cookies.” You announce with a shrug not wasting any time and move closer to your daughter who’s in your husband's arms, who stands there with mouth agape.

“No mowe cookies dada!” Iseul giggles as she makes grabby hands for you to pick her up, wiggling out of Jungkook's arms as you grab her.

“Now what do you mean no more cookies?” Jungkook switches Ye joon to his other arm, mouth hanging open dramatically. “There were like three packs in there, and you ate them in a few hours, so no more cookies.” You dance around the kitchen with Iseul in your arms, her chubby arms wrap around your neck as she laughs non-stop. Contrast from Jungkook on the other side of the white counter.

“What the fuck, baby?” Jungkook literally whines as Ye joon giggles, his little hands in his mouth, drool dripping down his chubby cheeks. “Come here, baby, come with your aunt.” You make your way to Ye joon only to stop in your tracks.

“Fuck!” Ye joon beams, clapping his hands, smiling up at you with all his baby teeth showing, as you stare at him dumbfounded.

“No, no, no, don’t say that.” You quickly interfere as Jungkook is staring at you with wide eyes. “Fuck! Fuck!” Ye joon laughs as Iseul joins in.

“Fuck!” Another giggle.

“This is so your fault!” You point to your husband who is trying so hard not to laugh. “Don’t laugh!” You put a hand over your mouth, trying to hide your amusement.

“I’m not— fuck!” Jungkook slaps a hand over his mouth.

“How the fuck are we going to explain this to Taehyung and Ari?” you sigh with a slight laughter in your tone.

“Fuck!”

“We couldn’t get Ye joon to stop saying the f word for like two weeks straight; daycare was seriously about to kick him out,” Taehyung sighs dramatically as Yoongi stares at Eunbi, his wife who stares down at her tiny belly. Wondering if that’s going to be his case in the future.

“Let’s pray for the new baby to not come out like this little beast,” Jimin squeezes Ye joon’s cheeks, making him squirm in Taehyung’s arms.

Ye joon, three years old, Taehyung and Ari’s child, the second-born from the group and the most mischievous, he really doesn’t listen to anyone but his parents, besides Jungkook and you. His godparents. Jiho, first-born, Seokjin’s and Lora’s child. He’s about to turn ten in January. Iseul, third-born, Jungkook's and your child, two years old and the only girl at the moment.

Besides Eunbi, who’s three months pregnant, no one else is going to have kids anytime soon, well, that’s what they say.

“It’s cold; let's go inside, girls.” You suggest as you pick up Iseul from her dad's arms, as the girls stand up following your movements inside the house through the glass door.

“Give Ye joon to Ari!” Hoseok hushes as he swats Taehyung on the shoulder. “Babe! Take Ye joon!” Taehyung shouts. Ari laughs at how her husband has Ye joon up in the air like the Lion King waiting to be taken.

“Come with mama.” Ari picks up the boy in a puffer jacket, making him look like a big marshmallow before skipping inside, joining all the girls inside.

“So sad Seokjin and Namjoon couldn’t come... they really decided on that cabin instead of us, crazy.” Jimin whines as he takes a sip of his beer before placing it in the hole he made in the snow before snuggling into his sweater.

“Honestly, I would take being in a cabin with my wife a hundred times more than being here,” Jungkook playfully jokes, “imagine the bomb-ass sex in the woods,” He smirks with the rim of his bottle on his lips, making the rest of the boys roll their eyes.

“Crazy how y/n has you wrapped around her finger,” Yoongi chimes in, blowing into his hands as if it would make them non-cold.

“Not even.” Jungkook playfully rolls his eyes.

“Dude, you’re so whipped, like it’s so fucking crazy,” Taehyung joins in, as he laughs when the boys hum in agreement.

“Dude, you tried to wrap her in bubble wrap when she was pregnant because you swore she would fall and hurt herself,” Hoseok recalls two years ago. “She could’ve fallen down the stairs; I needed to take precautions,” Jungkook tries to defend himself but fails miserably.

“What the fuck is that for?” You question your husband who enters the main door with a giant bubble wrap roll.

“This is for your safety, baby, can’t have you falling and hurting yourself, so I’m wrapping the whole house like it’s a Christmas present.”

You stare at your husband who is speaking literally, “Jeon, you are not wrapping anything,” you warn him.

“It’s either wrapping this house up or I’m wrapping you in bubble wrap for nine months... your choice baby,” Jungkook shrugs, looking down at your laying body on the couch, hands rubbing down your two-month pregnant belly.

“Be extremely for real.” Your mouth drops open dramatically.

“Even Iseul in her two years of life has you pining after her; imagine when she gets a boyfriend.” Jimin brings up, almost sending Jungkook into a cardiac attack right there and there.

“Fuck no! No boys till she’s forty!” Jungkook points his finger to Jimin. “Or girls either!” He finishes with a pout, making the boys howl in laughter.

“Excuse the fuck outta me!” Jungkook shoots up from his chair.

Somehow the conversation steered with a lighthearted joke about who was the biggest, and suddenly everyone ganged up on Jungkook, talking about he had the smallest dick of all of them.

“We all know that Taehyung has the biggest dick here, let's be honest,” Jimin shrugs, which only makes Jungkook's jaw drop lower.

“Say less, only one way to find out.” Jungkook reaches for his zipper.

“Ayo, what the fuck! There are children here,” Hoseok rushes out, “we are not about to whip our dicks out to compare sizes,” he finishes.

“Of course not.” Jungkook makes his way to the snow, his back facing the boys as his zipper gets pulled down, and before everyone knows it, he spreads his arms wide, face planting in the white snow.

“Shit, fuck, cold!” He scrambles to his feet, tucking himself in as he shivers from the cold. Then, he chuckles with a grin plastered on his face as he points to the snow angel on the snow… and a perfectly shaped imprint of his cock.

“So who’s next?” Jungkook asks.

“I’m grown, I’m not dipping my dick in the snow to compare dick sizes.” Yoongi shakes his head, crossing his arms.

They all dipped their dicks in the snow to compare dick sizes.

“What the fuck! I swear it shrunk cause it’s cold, I swear,” Taehyung begs to the boys who stare at all the lined imprints.

“Motherfuckers, I told y'all I was the biggest,” Jungkook smiles proudly as he sees he is the biggest out of all of them.

“I can’t believe this, we just boosted his ego more,” Jimin sighs as he stares at his own imprint and then to Jungkook's.

The glass door slides open, making the five men abruptly turn around. Five women come marching towards them, “what are you guys doing?” Ari asks, with a big smile on her face.

“Nothing,” Taehyung answers a little too fast.

You stare at your husband, raising your eyebrow at him, and that makes him fold like a lawn chair. “We were comparing dick sizes in the snow,” Jungkook blurts out, “I won though!” He cheers, pointing to his snow angel happily.

“Fucking shit, y/n how are you upright?” Eunbi gasps as she stares at Jungkook's imprint. “Now we know why you are always so damn happy,” Yoongi chimes in with a grin.

#jungkook #bts jungkook #bts fanfic #jjk #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fluff #jungkook x reader #fluff #bangtan #established relationship #married au #dilf jungkook #oneshot #blurb #jeon jungkook #jungkook smut #jeon jungguk #jeongguk #jeon jk #bts jk #bts x reader #bangtan fanfic #jjk fanfic #jjk smut #smut #bts #jjk fluff #jjk x reader #bts smut

[vanteguccir]

Matt x pregnant!reader who is craving katchup. Just how he would react to her wanting to eat it with everything and his way to deal with it, considering he hates it. (Not sure if this makes a full story, so if you want to just talk about it, it’s okay).

I LOVE YOUR IDEA!!! dad!Matt always gets me 😭🥺

And yes, since it would end in a super little short fic, I made a quick blurb! I hope you like it 🩷

༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

Matt Sturniolo x pregnant!reader

Y/N's senses came back with force on the Tuesday morning, a strange urge in her stomach bombarding her from every side of her body. She looked at the clock beside the bed with sleepy eyes and frowned when she saw that it was only six o'clock in the morning.

"Ketchup." She muttered to herself in a low tone. "I need ketchup."

Matt, her husband, was lying next to her, still sleeping peacefully, his right arm wrapped protectively around her 8-month belly. The woman hesitated for a moment, looking at him with a mixture of guilt and curiosity. Should she wake him up to satisfy her bizarre ketchup craving? She shook her head, deciding to let him rest.

Carefully sliding out of bed, Y/N put on her light pink robe - which was draped over Matt's gaming chair - and headed downstairs towards the kitchen. The smell of fresh coffee wafted through the air, having been made automatically by the coffee machine on the counter, but all she could think about was the taste of ketchup.

Y/N opened the fridge and found a bottle hidden behind some jars of jelly. With a satisfied smile, she leaned over and picked it up, clutching it as if it were the most precious item in the world, before opening one of the drawers on the counter next to the stove and taking out a spoon, opening the lid of the industrialized product and starting to devour it pure.

While she was there, deep in her strange morning desire, Matt appeared in the kitchen doorway, his hands rubbing his sleepy eyes and his clothes rumpled, showing that he had just gotten up. He looked at her with a confused expression, his blue eyes running over her figure leaning against the gray refrigerator.

"What the hell are you doing, sweetheart?" He asked, yawning loudly.

Y/N shrugged, embarrassed.

"I don't know. I just... need ketchup, I guess."

Matt raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued, but deciding not to say anything else, if there was anything he had learned during those 8 months, it was that you shouldn't question a pregnant woman. Instead, he simply approached her and wrapped his arms around her body, kissing the top of her head lovingly.

"I'll make breakfast." He said softly. "With... ketchup, if you want." His voice came out reluctantly, remnants of his feeling of disgust for the product dripping into his sentence.

Y/N smiled brightly, feeling grateful for her husband's silent support, nodding her head quickly. Together, they prepared a full breakfast of eggs, bacon, and toast, her dishes all covered generously with ketchup.

Throughout the day, Y/N continued to have strange cravings for ketchup. She put it on her salad, her turkey sandwich, and even her pizza. Matt looked at his wife with a mixture of disgust and horror, but he didn't say a word of protest, swallowing hard as the nausea rose in his throat each time the smell of the sauce rose to his nostrils.

Late in the afternoon, as Y/N devoured a burger covered in ketchup, she finally felt satisfied. The woman looked at Matt with a tired smile, feeling grateful for his unwavering support.

"Thanks for letting me eat all that ketchup today." She joked shyly, wiping her mouth with a napkin.

"It's not my favorite, but if it makes you happy, then I'm happy too." Matt shrugged, smiling back at her, glancing from the corner of his eye at the red bottle still on the table.

Y/N leaned her body slightly towards him, making a small pout, expecting a kiss, but all she received was Matt's palm pressing against her lips gently.

"Go brush your teeth first, honey. Everything has a limit."

#vante asks #matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo x reader #matt sturniolo fic #matt sturniolo x you #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo x reader fluff #fluff #pregnant!reader #husband!matt #matthew sturniolo x reader

[norrisleclercf1]

a blurb about the the reader accidentally appears on a stream and ends up revealing their relationship which was a secret (the reader didn't want to become famous so she asked lando not to talk about the relationship)

Thank u

A/n: Straight to my heart this one, you've got it.

You're a normal person, but the person you have chosen to fall in love with is far from normal.

He's a world wide, famous athlete that has girls and guys throwing themselves at him. It's overwhelming for you, someone who liked quiet and keeping to yourself.

So when you started to date Lando, you told him straight out you didn't want to have your relationship out in the open. People knew Lando was dating, they just didn't know who.

Whoever it was, is making their driver happier, lighter, just changed him for the better. Lando was currently streaming and the occasional question about his relationship would appear on his screen.

Lando just smiles, saying that he's very happy and to respect yours and his privacy.

You on the other hand, stood in the kitchen wearing one of his shirts and some shorts, trying to open a jar. Cursing under your breathe you whine, just wanting to open the damn jar so you could finish making yours and Lando's lunch.

It didn't even occur to you that Lando was streaming, forgotten completely. Walking to the closed door, jar in hand you open the door. Lando jumps, surprised by the sudden intrusion.

"Lando....I can't open the stupid jar, help." You whine, annoyed with the lid. Lando giggles, spinning in the chair to look at you. "Come here." Stomping over you hand him the jar, hearing the pop as Lando opens it with no issues.

"There you go, bug." You lean down, kissing him gently and leave. Both of you oblivious to the fact you just threw a grenade at the fans. Spinning back around, Lando has a goofy smile on his lips, freezing when he see that the stream just saw everything.

"Oh fuck." Dropping his head, just waiting for the other shoe to drop. "LANDO!" You scream, his head snaps up he waves bye rushing out some words and turning off the stream.

The fans fell in love with you after that.

#f1 #formula 1 #f1 fandom #f1 x reader #f1 x y/n #formula one #f1 imagine #f1 scenario #lando norris #f1 fluff #f1 blurb #f1 one shot #f1 x you #lando norris x you #lando x you #lando norris x reader #lando x reader #lando norris fluff #lando norris imagine #lando norris blurb

[finalgirllx]

thought you hated me | mattheo riddle entry 1 of a little anthology series i am starting with mattheo. as a way to practice writing without committing to a long series, i'll be writing a few blurbs for him based on the 'enemies to lovers' trope. 1.1k words | nsfw | minors dni | f!reader this is also a thank you for 2000 followers, like holy cow. that's insane. thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has supported my nonsense.

"Hey, hey! Watch it! The recipe calls for a scoop of rose petals, not the entire bloody jar," you scold the curly-haired prick. He abided by your warning, much to your surprise, but not without tilting the jar above the cauldron a few extra times just to savor your irritation. You can't help but wonder what past mistakes led you to be doomed by fate to be partnered with Mattheo Riddle for potions class.

The whole school was aware of your mutual hatred, and neither of you made any effort to conceal it. It had been this way for so long that you couldn't even pinpoint why you hated him. Well, besides his utterly insufferable personality and a pisspoor attitude that not even his stellar good looks could redeem.

"He's an arrogant prick." "What a wretched tart." "A hotheaded muppet." "An absolute menace to civil society."

These were just a few recent jabs exchanged between you, either spoken directly or whispered through the grapevine. As long as everyone knows how much you despise each other, it suffices.

After your taunt over the rose petals, Mattheo's gaze bore into you beneath impossibly full eyelashes before he released a huff of pure disdain at your rigidity.

"You can piss off with that attitude. I say the one of us who didn't cause an explosion in class last week gets the bigger say over our potion-making," Mattheo countered, to which you promptly stood at attention and turned to face him, hands planted firmly on your hips.

"If that's the qualification, then I've had the upper hand practically every week this entire term! I cause one explosion, and you think you're all that," you argued back, to which Mattheo responded with a tired eye roll before he fixed his spiteful gaze fully on you.

"Well, I do have the right. Especially when you caused the explosion by staring at Cormac fucking McLaggen while biting your lip like an idiot," he grumbled, his voice lowered but the intensity still sending a shiver down your spine. You knew the implications of his words and that the facade could crumble under the man's temper in moments if you didn't tread forward lightly.

"Yeah, well, I don't see why you'd care, but I'll keep my eyes off of him," you begrudgingly relented with a shrug. You would have given him an earful with just about any other provocation, but what he could risk revealing over this wasn't worth continuing to bicker over.

"Good girl," Mattheo purrs the next time he leans closer to grab an ingredient, quiet enough so only you could hear, causing the heat rising between you to stay put. "Guess I'll need to find another reason to cave the bloke's face in," he adds, much to your dismay. You wanted to say something then, but the professor's perfectly timed interjection to order you both to focus on your work momentarily set the matter aside. -----------------

"Are you really going to make an arse of yourself and beat up Cormac if he and I so much as exchange a glance?" You questioned Mattheo incredulously as he hastily pulled you into a nearby empty broom closet with little resistance from yourself. The door had barely clicked shut before he tore off his robe and moved on to remove yours.

"You want to fucking try something? See how that works out for you, I'll make your ass red for weeks," Mattheo growled into your ear as his hands roamed your still-clothed torso, finding purchase on your breasts as he began to knead them, growing desperate for skin-to-skin contact. Your insolence had gotten him painfully turned on, urging him to handle your attitude with touches he knew would render you pliant. The whimpers his groping solicited from you had become the answer to his prayers.

This little arrangement had become second nature to you by now. You give Mattheo lip, which gets him riled up, so you both seek a release for your pent-up frustrations by way of you taking his dick. Each time, without fail, you two agree that this would be the last time. But having 'hated' each other for so long, you know just how to test the other's patience, him becoming as weak to your taunts as you are to his touch.

"Care so much about who I'm looking at, huh?" you mocked Mattheo as he attempted to undo the buttons on your top, his thought capacity overridden by lust. "I thought you hated me," you continued to bait him with a hint of amusement to mask the genuine curiosity for what he might say. A gasp escaped you when Mattheo removed one hand from your chest to take your chin in between two fingers, lifting your head to meet his eyes that were already ruining you in his mind. He pressed his body against yours, letting you feel his hardness through his trousers.

"You know I fucking hate you," Mattheo replied through gritted teeth, his ferocity laced with arousal. "Doesn't mean anyone gets a glimpse of what's mine."

Your lips pulled into a smirk contentedly in response, not the least bit intimidated by him. In fact, you were pretty proud to have evoked such a reaction out of him. Sure, maybe you felt afraid for Cormac, but after witnessing Mattheo Riddle get on his knees to beg for your pussy, it had become difficult to take his threats seriously. The man was down bad, and you relished in the way you could reduce him to a needy mess, though he probably felt similar when you turned into a babbling slut every time he made you cum on his cock. If anything, the rage made you just as greedy for him as he was for you.

You took the lead in removing the rest of your top, freeing Mattheo so he could bury his face in your neck, latching on and sucking the skin to leave noticeable, possessive marks. He proceeded to cover you with hot kisses that trailed further down your chest, with each unclasped button giving him more space to work with until your top was fully removed and strewn on the floor with abandon. He sunk to his knees before you, letting you ensnare one hand in his hair to brace yourself as he took the peak of one of your breasts in his mouth, which brought a moan from your lips. Forgetting the animosity and allowing pleasure to take over, you've all but given up on believing that this time would be the last.

#mattheo riddle #mattheo riddle x reader #mattheo riddle smut #mattheo riddle x you #slytherin #slytherin boys

[3lli3l0v3r]

how soon is now? | part one

READ THIS FIRST 🇵🇸

teasers: one. two. series masterlist. next part here!!

♡: hallway crush!ellie x uni student!reader

☆: listen, i know this timeline is kind of ridiculous, but i’ve organized it all best as i can! this is the expanded story based on those first little blurbs introducing the au (reads fine on its own though), and this part specifically was originally going to be one huge fic, but i've ultimately decided to split it up and drop the first part now, because i feel like it ends in a convenient enough space where i can make a separation not so jarring. so that means this will have a direct continuation (how soon is now? 2 ? lol this is so stupid-), and that will be posted soon enough once i finish it! but yes that means after so much waiting, it's finally here for y’all. i literally thought up this silly idea right before i passed out on new years, and never expected y’all to love it so much…but i keep my promises, so here. also love the smiths and felt the title sort of fit. i feel like not too much happens but eh anyway, thank you for waiting, thank you for reading, and please enjoy!

♧:4.6k word count

◇:suggestive but not explicit - horny descriptions and tension, however no smut (for now?….BUT DON'T HOLD ME TO THAT.) no descriptions of reader’s physical appearance, no use of “y/n”, slow-burn construction and loooooads of pining, a lot of build up but stay with me, attempts at occasional foreshadowing, smau elements(text messages lmao), savage starlight is a plot point lol, hallwaycrush!ellie is sort of a mix of loser/modern/university au/dorky-ish ellie I DON'T EVEN KNOW. abby is your bestie, girl what else do i put here- this is just kinda plot, plot, and more plot progression about the whole ordeal, and me indulging my obsession with modern!ellie. (lmk if there's anything to be added!)

“Abbyyyyyyyyyy.” 

You rolled around your lifelong best friend’s bed, babbling her ear off while she studied away at her desk, or tried to at least. This situation has been a daily occurrence for weeks at this point.

Laying on your stomach facing away from her, you could hear her scoff in annoyance. “What?” “Please give me some advice..I don't know what I'm even supposed to do. She's driving me up the wall." This crush was the sole thing occupying your poor mind, so naturally, you had to drown your bestie with your troubles as well. That's what friends do. Abby spun around on her chair to face you, with a clearly fed up expression on her face, and leaning forward, resting her elbows on her knees. 

“Well I don’t fucking know man, I’ve already given you my best advice, and that's either introduce yourself, or suffer.” She said coolly. You sat up and groaned. Wasn't there an easier way? One that didn't involve actually taking initiative and doing something? Maybe, hypothetically, you ace a test, and the professor announces it in front of everyone as he emotionally congratulates his star student, and she bounds over, beaming. Then tearfully confesses her love and admiration for you- hold on, where the fuck is this going?

“Oh come on, you know I can’t do that..” You gulped a burning bundle of anxiety down as you replayed the scenarios with your obsession for the thousandth time that day, the mere crumbs you were forced to fixate on until you saw her next, the first sighting that started this whole fiasco,  and shook your head to clear it and listen to what your best friend had to say. She sighed and rubbed her eyes, slamming her textbook shut and making her way over to sit next to you.

“Listen babe, I love you, but you really gotta get ahold of yourself, alright?” She spoke sternly, looking you straight in the eyes to make sure you understood and absorbed every last word she said. “Listen, here's what you're gonna do. when you pass her in the hall, smile, it's simple but it's a classic, okay? And then you listen to the lecturer as normal, right? I have no idea what you nerds do in astrophysics, but that's besides my point. Make sure to pay attention and not stare only at her like a stalker or something, I cannot stress enough how normal you gotta be. But here's where it gets good, you still with me?” 

You're listening to her for sure, and nod vigorously. Crystal clear. She continues, “Okay you said you sit as far as possible from her? Sheesh, why'd you do that? When the class is over I want you to go over to her, and introduce yourself. Catch her on her way out, tap her on the shoulder if you're feeling bold. Ask for some of her contact details, play it cool. Just don't shit yourself, got it? All you gotta do." 

Abby finishes her speech, smirking and looking smug. She's positive she got through to you this time. On the surface you're totally chill, confident even, ready to snatch this ethereal being for yourself, however underneath all that you knew you didn't have an ounce of the courage that was required for this seemingly impossible task. 

Breathing deeply to calm yourself and try to take in her helpful words as best as possible, you give Abby a hug. “Thank you Abs, really. I'll do my best. Oh, but what if I freak out and start stuttering- or what if I trip and fall on her…I can't do this what the hell.” Swarmed with worry, you start doubting yourself yet again. Burying your face in your palms, you feel two strong hands on either side of your upper arms and you look back at Abby, who's really not playing around anymore. 

She was so serious about this it almost scared you. Either she cared about you more than anything, or she wanted to hear the end of these pathetic, lovestruck rambles. You prayed it was the former. 

“Suck it up. You can do this. You've had crushes before haven't you? This should be a piece of cake c’mon, I believe in you. Make sure to keep me updated every step of the way! I need to hear every last detail.” She lightens up at the end and releases you from her grip once she sees you've relaxed. 

Unsurprisingly, your best friend always knew what to say to snap you out of your spirals. Maybe most would disagree with her methods, say she was being rough, but they worked for you. Heart rate returning to a normal pace, you reply genuinely. 

“Okay, okay I got this. Yeah, it'll be fine.” She was getting through to you, this time you felt sure of it. “Good, good. Now will you let me finish this stupid assignment? Then we can watch something or do whatever." Abby chatted as she got up and sat back at her desk, resuming her studious endeavor as she left you with your thoughts. 

Immediately you heard her mutter, “All this and you don't even know her goddamn name…good grief.” For the sake of preserving the peace you chose to graciously ignore that one. She said she wanted some quiet, didn't she? 

Drifting away into a sea of daydreams, your thoughts inevitably returned to being clouded by this cryptic figure. It was like she'd cast a love spell on you. Did she even know who you were? Or did she shoot everyone those insufferably charming looks of hers. Was she even aware of how fucking cool she was? 

Dressed in that deliciously grungy style, you yearned to know what floated behind her greener-than-grass eyes. Her hair looked so smooth and soft, the wispy auburnette strands framing her refined features, intriguing fern tattoo decorating her lean forearm…. You felt your cheeks begin to heat up as a portrait of her materialized in your mind's eye. Nestling into the comfortable atmosphere of your best friend's room, you sunk deeper into your thoughts.

Like Abby had mentioned, it certainly wasn't as if you've never had crushes before, you've certainly had your fair share of them, like most people. But that was a sort of flaky, surface level interest, whether it be for their looks, their little quirks, or ways they treated you. Maybe it has been a while since you'd had a proper crush, but you couldn't recall a time when the infatuation, the pure limerence, had hit you this hard before. You almost felt helpless, just besotted by her.

You simply needed to act on this. Right then and there you steeled yourself, and decided you were going to follow Abby's advice after all, and go after this hallway crush. Worst comes to worst, she turns you down, you get over it eventually, bla bla end of story. It wasn't going to be too complicated, right?

You and Abby had stayed up all night, dusk till dawn, gossiping about things other than your hallway crush, shocking, and you were greatly regretting that decision the very moment it was time to gather your books and get to class.

You really did not feel like stunning everyone around you with a gorgeous outfit today, you were just trying to make it through the day in one piece to be honest with yourself. 

With a pounding headache you threw on some mismatched sweats, and ran out the door to be on time. Your bag felt unreasonably heavy as you made your way down your apartment stairs, and you cursed your past self for choosing a building without an elevator. Sure, exercise is healthy, but it can’t be when you’re feeling like a zombie, and wish for nothing more than a good, long nap.

Luckily the lecture hall was a comfortable distance away from your place, not far enough to make it a pain, but enough so you could get a much needed breath of fresh air. The tiredness had pushed all plans of action you and Abby had discussed the previous night to the back of your head, and you weren't thinking of your crush at all. At least for now. 

Walking slowly with your gaze pointed downward, you eventually made it to the hall. Completely dazed and zoned out, you made a mental note to never pull an all nighter again, gross, who’s idea was that- thump. 

Out of nowhere you're rudely jolted from your silent sulking by colliding with something, or someone? It takes a moment to register what happened, and you quickly look up from staring at the ground to sort the situation out. “Oh my gosh I am so sorry..” 

Profusely apologizing while simultaneously being smacked across the face with the realization of who this was. Her. Your words trail off as you’re suddenly winded, and you feel your blood run cold. You’re transfixed by the intense eye contact, and it feels like time has stopped. Goodness, this is dramatic. 

In the time it takes for you to briefly die and come back to life, the young woman has lowered her chunky headphones so they rest around her neck, Morissey’s vocals faintly floating out of them, and is looking at your stunned state with an indiscernible sneer playing on her face. Was this actually happening? Holy shit you and Abby did not discuss this scenario…you weren’t looking where you were going and had collided with an actual Earth angel. Great.

Still gawking at her like an absolute buffoon, akin to a deer in headlights, she breaks the tension first, with a smooth voice that you would obey virtually any command for. 

“Nah, you’re good.” And a wink. Your heart skipped a beat, or four, when you witnessed her wink at you. Did you imagine it? Was she being suave on purpose or did she have an eyelash in her eye…Was your life a literal rom-com or what? 

“Um..” Your mouth opens and closes in an attempt to form a coherent sentence, but your brain is much too fried to do so because, well, you had just made physical contact with the literal girl of your dreams. And gods did she smell good…while you’re unable to tear your eyes away from hers, she keeps talking as if nothing happened.

“I think the prof had an emergency or fuckin’, I dunno.” She stops to gesture around the two of you at the crowd that had formed in front of the auditorium’s double doors with elegant, ring adorned fingers..holy fuck you needed those inside you right fucking now- WHAT. 

Briskly shoving those thoughts down to the deepest depths of your subconscious back to where they belong, you turned your attention back to her, and put on a brave front. Hyper aware of how searing hot your face felt, her pretty self didn't show a hint of caring that you were making a fool of yourself. They say that any situation is always worse in your head than it was in actuality, well you hoped so. 

“So, what are we supposed to do now?” Clearing your throat you managed a sentence back, hooray. You were doing this. Good job. Although, of course, before the gorgeous nymph before you had a chance to respond with her own assumptions, a substitute lecturer you had never seen before pushes his way through the crowd and unlocks the door while people file in, separating you from her. You felt like Rose, viciously torn away from Jack from Titanic, what a cruel, cruel world this was.

And once again you didn't get to ask her name. Re-slinging her bag with one arm, she looks back at you one final time and throws you a “cya around.” Before disappearing into the auditorium with everyone else. You meekly nod at her and force a lopsided smile, before leaning against the wall to steady yourself after that fiasco in the now empty hallway.

Wasting virtually not a moment of time, you pulled your phone out and began furiously texting Abby with a recount of the events at a speed faster than the speed of light. 

Once that excruciatingly torturous class was over, you applauded yourself for containing the stares in her direction and keeping your eyes fixated on the professor. Whether you actually retained any information, now that was a different story. Picking up your bags and laptop, you stay behind for a moment as everyone else files out, no need to crowd and suffocate amongst the other students, and you had nowhere to be except catch up on your favorite shows and relax all by yourself. 

Filing out the auditorium with everyone else, you see a familiar face pass by you, and vaguely hear Abby’s voice in your head urging you to seize the moment. Now’s your chance, go! And so you gather every little bit of strength you possess to do just that. 

After a couple deep breaths you jog up to her. “Uh, hey.” She turns around and gives you a warm smile, making your legs instantly turn to jelly. You subtly checked her out and took in her outfit, another bulky jacket and lightly distressed jeans. Fingers studded with layered silver rings, and those big ole headphones seemed to be magnetically attached to her, she always had them on her. Note to self: ask for some music recommendations.

She was even hotter up close…with a beautiful galaxy of freckles scattered across her fair skin, you wanted to place a kiss on every single of them. “I, um, never caught your name.” “It's Ellie.” She sticks out her hand for a handshake and you accepted it, you finally had a name to the face you've been pining over so intensely for so long. Abby was going to lose it once you tell her about this. You steady your voice and hide the glee that was likely evident from this interaction going so smoothly, and introduce yourself to her as well.

After some time of idle chit chat and standing there, neither one of you knowing really what to say, Ellie pipes up, facepalming, tsking, and furrowing her brows. “Oh yeah, I don’t mean to spring this on you outta nowhere, but would you wanna study sometime?” She flushes a dusty pink, “I don't know anyone else taking this course and am having kind of a hard time with it...when I chose it, I expected it to be more about space and the planets, and less about numbers and math, my head hurts.”

Her demeanor was making you feel rather comfortable with her, even though the two of you had just formally met a few minutes prior. “I would love to, yeah!” Maybe you were being a little too enthusiastic, but at this point you were operating on pure instinct and not thinking critically of what was coming out of your mouth. “I actually don't have any plans now, or today at all, so if you want to, we can get a head start before the next class?” Well that just slipped out. Go you, blurting things out. 

You had no idea why you'd said that because your place was an absolute mess, clothes strewn everywhere, trash can still full, you'd been too preoccupied with your studies, and well her, to do much about it. To your horror, Ellie exclaims, “Hey, that's perfect! I don't have anything to do right now either, and it would be good to act on it while it's still fresh in my mind, y’know?” Her face morphs into an adorable toothy grin as she taps on her skull comically, you were becoming more obsessed by the second, if that was even possible.

Every little sliver of her personality you got to see under the stoic one you had assumed she had just grasped at your heartstrings. You smiled back at her so hard you almost pulled a muscle in your cheeks, “Awesome! Follow me, then, my dorm isn't far.”

The walk there was mostly fine as the two of you made it to your place, Ellie occasionally making comments about how she hates the class even though she adores outer space and learning about it on her own time, and you were nodding and acting as if you're listening, agreeing with her robotically while she rambled away and you daydreamed about what her lush lips would feel like on yours. You wondered if she was gentle with it, or if she’d kiss you hungrily, devour you like her very last meal….gulp.

Leading her to your place was an automatic task, not much navigation needed, and when the journey was done you had to legitimately stop short for a moment in an attempt to soothe the pounding in your chest. 

The crush that has plagued your mind for ages, who you've just met formally today, was about to be in your room. The two of you were about to be alone. That was totally fine, yeah, she can't be a murderer…..right?

“You good?” She asked sweetly, why did she have to be so nice, “Those stairs were killer, I totally get it, phew.” “Oh for sure, gets me every time.” Covering up your panic smoothly, you unlocked the door and went inside with her. When she walked inside, Ellie took a glance around your room and set herself down at the edge of your bed, immediately making herself comfortable, while you still lingered in the doorway, awkwardly swaying and staring at her, unsure of what to do with yourself. 

Suddenly you had completely forgotten why she was here in the first place. “No way, you read Savage Starlight too???” She spotted the figurine on your desk and snatched it up in her hands to inspect it thoroughly, with a childlike wonder in her eyes. “Wow, this one was a limited edition and it sold out in like an hour, I'm so jealous you got this!! How much you want for it, I'm serious.” She was so excited, and you couldn't believe it. Savage Starlight has always been one of your favorite comics ever, you've loved it since you were a young teen, and now this seemingly perfect human before you, who you're hopelessly obsessed with says she loves it too? Could she get any more flawless, is all you could wonder.

Her happiness because of this little thing you two bonded over was infectious, and some of your nerves slowly began to go away.  Grinning genuinely, you sheepishly said, “I've never met anyone else who likes it, that story has helped me through lots of phases in my life, and Daniela was my gay awakening.” Ellie gaped at you for a beat, making you almost doubt revealing that information.

“No. Fuckin’. Way. Mine too! Her suit was just- damn. And those action scenes in the third volume had my thirteen year old self’s brain just mush for, I don't even know for how long. This is crazy, I can already see we’re gonna get along so well.”

You wanted to talk to her about everything and anything forever, and her glee made you want to squish her, but there was unfortunately work to be done first. “There’s so much we have to discuss, but we gotta get some studying done first if we wanna make it out of this course alive.”

You were sitting at your desk, hunched over the sprawled out textbooks and messy notes, as you drew the graphs and talked to her about the concepts she was struggling with. Your desk was so small and you only had one chair, and you were the one using it, so Ellie was forced to hover over you to see all you were doing.

Focusing solely on the subject before you was proving to be more difficult as studying time went by, because you were a little too aware of the way she had caged you in against the desk to watch, her oversized shirt grazing your upper back. You gripped your pen ever so tightly to minimize any trembling, and kept a steady voice as best you could while explaining it all.

She was so, so close, the tension in the tiny room was palpable, she didn't seem to notice your nervous tremors or the proximity she’d created, and the low murmurs of, “ohhh, mhm, yeah,” as you embarrassingly stammered over your explanations made you flushed and to be frank, needy. You could feel her warmth radiating off of her, could faintly hear her breathing just above you. You didn't dare move a muscle. Was she feeling this too?

At this point you swore the delicious gravelly vibrations from her voice this close to you would be plenty enough to make you cream your pants. The air in the enclosed space was getting hotter and thicker by every passing moment, it took everything you had to keep yourself from losing your mind right now. If you moved back a petty few inches, you’d be pressed flush with her front. What would that be like, you wondered. Oh, no. Your throat felt drier than the desert when you swallowed, the thought of that making you weak.

Since your focus on the work was lapsing, you were beginning to make some little mistakes and blunders, compelling her to take the pen right from your hand and fix them herself. “No, no, this one’s supposed to be like this instead, see? Then you're able to get the right answer which is…” She stretches over you further, you nearly whined, someone save you, and grabs the textbook to review the solution. “Like this, yeah, I was right. Honest mistake though, don’t worry about it.”

You nod your head and make a pathetic murmur of approval, ignoring the fiery tingles spreading all the way up your arm when her hand bumps yours to return the writing utensil, and the blistering coil of want forming in your stomach. This all had to be deliberate, right? She couldn't lack that much spatial awareness, could she? Well, it wasn’t that you minded, she could get as close as she damn wanted to, you'd let her throw you around like a ragdoll even- you were just afraid your heart was going to give out if she kept it up. “Could you show me this work you guys did? Of course the one day I'm late, the prof talks about something new and I miss it.” 

What feels like an eternity later, you hear her groan above you and she returns to her earlier spot on your bed. You can finally breathe properly. Glancing at the clock, your own headache begins to set in. Crap it was late, how time flies. 

“We’ve been studying for so long, it’s getting late.” “Shit, you’re right, I’ve definitely overstayed my welcome. Sorry about that, and hey, thanks for this. I understand it all a lot better now, see you tomorrow.”

She stands up abruptly and ushers herself out of your door in a flash, to which you clumsily stand up, knock your chair over, and hastily run after her, not wanting her to go just yet. “Wait, Ellie!” “What's up, did I forget something?”

She pats her pockets and looks at you with concern. Round puppy dog eyes, and lips in a miniscule pout, so cute. You were in front of her now, but did not process what you actually wanted to say. Just ran after her like the smitten nincompoop you are. Upon feeling your face go hot, you look at the ground to mutter, “Uh- nothing. See you later.” Realistically, what were you planning on saying, or doing?

After stumbling over your words you two finally part ways and you slump down against your door, missing her presence already. You simultaneously wanted to jump around or open your bedside table drawer to release the energy you'd accumulated, and wanted to fall into the deepest sleep of your life to recuperate from the experience. This was just, a lot. You wanted to scream and screech like there's no tomorrow, but did not want to deal with noise complaints from the others living on your floor. Gosh she was so close, she shares your niche interest, your hands touched, albeit accidentally, lo and behold you were in love with her.

Maybe it was early to call it that, but you were going to plan out your future together. Preferably a quaint, peaceful farmhouse, the one you two lovebirds renovated together exactly how you envisioned, where you could ogle her doing the farmwork. Ugh. Cook all her favorite meals, make sweet, sweet love under the moonlight. Take strolls through the flower gardens you two planted, receive her curated bouquets as gifts, you two are going to have such a tender, domestic life. 

You had to mull it over some more, and didn’t dare wish to forget how close she was to you, you were still buzzing from her essence. You were pointlessly pacing around your room now, unable to stop looping the study session's events in your head. The simplicity, the eroticism of the encounter. One-sided or not, you had yet to find out more about her, the impatience was going to take over. The day almost seemed too good to be true, but for now you had to force yourself to relax and think about something other than her. Time to browse Pinterest with striking kitchen ideas for your beautiful future. 

What were you going to say to her the next time you see her? You were eager to know how, or if at all, this new friendship was going to progress. Part of you was dying of impatience, but the rest of you wanted to take it all as slow as possible, savoring every little moment and making the most of it. 

You sighed, this was going to be a long, long, year.

lovely taggies: @amiorca @mostlyhornyandsad @lasting-lover @radioheadfan699 @sophie-thefrog8 @machetegirl109 @ellieschair @aouiaa @wavesgocrash @tangerinngi @elliesbitchvenus @dinaissoprettyoml @rxreaqia @camicocom1a @elliesexual @ellslvr @boobdrug @writing-on-a-bathroom-stall @bready101 @yourelliewillms

.......really hoping this doesn't flop because it isn't smutty, yall wanted more fics that are plot soooo

#pluto + their pen ☆ #hallway crush!ellie #ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie x reader #ellie tlou #lesbian #the last of us 2 #ellie the last of us 2 #tlou #ellie the last of us #tlou ellie #ellie williams fanfiction #ellie williams fanfic #ellie williams smut #ellie williams headcanons #ellie williams x you #ellie williams tlou #ellie williams x y/n #ellie williams x female reader #ellie x fem reader #ellie x you #ellie x y/n #modern!ellie williams #modern!ellie #tlou fanfiction #tlou 2 x reader #tlou part 2 #tlou fic #tlou2

[bobluvbot]

late night cravings

pairing: sirius black x afab!reader summary: you sneak off the night for a cheeky midnight snack, hoping sirius won’t notice (spoiler alert: he does, and he’s sulky about it)  wc: 4k cw: pregnancy & baby talk, descriptions of food and eating, brief allusions to sex (not directly stated), no physical traits of reader specified but sirius can hold things out of reader’s reach  a/n: so i had a lengthy angst fic for sirius’s debut on my blog and im halfway done on it but i cant seem to finish it bc it sends me to a depressing spiral each time <33333 so pls enjoy a very self-indulgent domestic excessively fluffy blurb with my beloved <33333 p.s this is not proofread so plz ignore mistakes ty <3

opening the tomato salsa jar turned out to be the hardest part. 

back in bed, you thought the trickiest part of your late night escapade from sirius black was his long limbs wound up tight with yours, even in low light of the small nightlight in the corner, you could still make out the intricate script and designs following the curves and dips of his strong arms, holding you close to his chest. 

you had it committed to memory by now, having explored sirius’s body well enough to memorize the way his skin feels against yours, with heartbeats and breaths falling in sync without much effort. 

judging by the way his breathing gets heavy after every exhale and the little snores that escape in between, you knew he was beyond knackered. it was day five of sirius’s new job as an deputy director at the auror office. the day he learned about the promotion was pure unadulterated happiness. after letting you know through an express owl, you mustered up enough vigor available to your seven months pregnant self to get out of the house and go to the local shops to get party supplies and food to celebrate sirius’s achievement. 

Coming in third out of the list of things he genuinely loved in this life, after you and his luscious locks of course, was his job as an auror. young sirius had never thought in his wildest dreams that he’d work at the ministry, much less actually enjoy it. can’t really blame sixteen year old sirius, starting an underground rock band with the marauders seemed like the perfect thing to do after gruelling hours of studying at hogwarts. 

defense against the dark arts came to him naturally, with some counterspells like second nature to him as being exposed with use of dark magic young gave him no choice but to grow up quickly and defend himself from the excruciating pain or the mind control that was from his own family’s doing. Winning the first wizarding war alongside his friends and found family has solidified sirius’s calling in eradicating the use of dark magic and making sure the next generation can have a safe and normal life without the looming threat of a megalomaniac sorting people with their blood status and taking over the wizarding world. 

that night, sirius walked into a dark and eerily quiet home that had his senses on overdrive. but when the lights turned on and he saw familiar faces of his loved ones all beaming with pride, and there you were in the center, looking ethereal and round and all his, with his favorite red velvet cake on hand and a ridiculously big balloon that says “congratulations” tied to the candle, he could have melted in a syrupy mess of gooey happiness right then and there if he hadn’t caught himself together last minute.

Sirius had thought– that after you agreeing to go on one date with him to hogsmeade, winning the quidditch cup and seeing the proud look on minerva’s face, going home for christmas break and euphemia welcoming him with a kiss on the cheek and a warm hug, remus teaching at the very same classroom you all were in years back, james and lily’s first kiss at the altar, holding little baby harry in his arms, you walking down the aisle with a bouquet of peonies in the most beautiful dress, and when you held his hand that one night and told him that you were expecting—- that he knew of love. but you do something extraordinary that has him scrambling to add to the endless list of why you’re the love of his life. he was so focused on you that he wasn’t prepared to catch pure muscle of james’s body as he flung himself to tackle his best friend in a hug. luckily, remus with a party hat was aptly standing between a toppling sirius and the living room wall, and he singlehandedly saved the two from creating a huge hole in the drywall. 

this was the life, sirius had thought after many hours of partying celebrating and eating, when he laid beside you in bed, limbs tangled, sated and dizzy and warm as you both came down from your highs. and he gets to spend it with you.

but as fun and exciting sirius’s new job is, it entailed an increased amount of responsibility as he was assisting the head auror. his least favorite part of the job was the boatloads of paperwork he has to deal with. An express owl almost dropped a howler letter into the soup you were making for dinner earlier that day and you opened it up panicking thinking it was an emergency. But no, it was just sirius whining that his hand hurt and is about to fall off and that he needs you to kiss it better. 

You did eventually, and one thing led to another and here you were, tucked in your husband’s warm embrace. you could stay here forever, only separating to drink water and bathroom trips, but the gnawing urge to eat something savory, sweet, tangy, and crunchy has possessed your entire being, the only way to quell it was to get up and go to the kitchen. the baby doesn’t seem to have a semblance of time yet, a fact you both envied and despised, because the clock on your nightstand said it was 3:48am in bold red numbers. A few months ago, you’d never be caught dead awake at this time, taking your precious sleep time seriously. The man himself would poke fun at you and say you’d gladly sleep through an earthquake or a housefire just as long as you get your seven to eight hours of sleep per day, and despite of your assumed role of contradicting and arguing with spontaneous and stubborn sirius, you had to agree.

But this was not about you anymore, or at least not quite yet for a good seventeen years, so you untangle yourself from sirius and your perfectly warm and cool side of the bed and waddle down the carpeted stairs, careful not to set foot on the creaky step that might risk waking sirius up. You need your secrets too, and you’re not in the mood to share food.

Grateful for the heavens that you and sirius stocked up on groceries two days ago, you had a wide selection of random items to munch on. A few days ago, you were introduced to the idea of a fluffernutter sandwich while scrolling through the short videos on your feed. Peanut butter and marshmallow fluff as spreads on their own was something you didn’t mind eating, but both together in a sandwich? You were enthralled, and the only way to quell the curiosity was to make it. So you did. 

You shovel and slather more than enough spread on each slice of bread, though you might have used the same spoon on both jars.. but who’s to tell you off otherwise, your snoozing husband upstairs? pfft. 

Smiling happily as if committing a particularly naughty crime, you place the spoon in your mouth, licking off the gooey mixture as you place the sandwich on a piece of paper towel (yes, you take the no dishwashing tonight seriously) on the table. humming, you mull over what to prepare next.

The baby needs something savory and tangy, but you’re not particularly keen on going through all the effort of heating up the soup from dinner, not to mention the amount of cutlery and dishes you’ll use for that, so you zero in on the tostada shells you chose rather than tortilla chips because its much more crispier. 

Opening the fridge, you see the laughing cow on a round packaging and decide its the one, so you grab two cheese wedges from it. 

Sirius had argued that the next aisle had actual, real blocks of cheese with a variety on display and that there was no point in getting artificially flavored ones. But you’ve gotten really good at giving him the stank face, which inadvertently ends 75 percent of nonsense bickering before it even starts; and since you’ve started showing more and more, sirius has admittedly gone softer on you, not that he was ever more but a pushover your entire relationship. Merely widening of eyes and a jut of your lower lip, even adding a slight tremble or two during times where you did actually fuck up, sirius can’t hold his stance longer than a minute before sighing and taking you in his arms. he might call you out for being a brat at times, but there’s no denying he loves it. And so the artificial wheel of cheese wedges got purchased and bagged home, and you’re meticulously spreading it over the golden shells, leaving little to no gaps of it bare. 

Laying it on another paper towel, your heart gets giddy on your chest knowing you’re in for a treat tonight. But not quite time to start munching, the baby reminds you that you still need something tangy to complete the meal. So comes your big predicament, should you get dill pickles or tomato salsa? 

It took you ten seconds too long of weighing down the pros-and-cons of choosing one and feeling like you made the wrong choice if you end up not liking it. It doesn’t help that the pregnancy hormones make you more anxious and tend to put you always on the verge of tears. So when the not-so-groundbreaking idea of just eating them both hits you, you feel the weight slide off your shoulders as you sigh. Because again, who’s gonna tell you that eating pickles this late at night can give you bad acid reflux, your snoozing husband? Pfft.

Snacking on some, you do manage to pick out the juiciest looking pickle chips and lay them atop of your tostadas. You and the little one are beyond excited to dive in. It’s looking like a mini upside-down pizza with the cheese spread first then the pickle as toppings. Only thing left now was the the tomato salsa slathered on top to seal the deal. 

Opening tight lids wasn’t an issue for you before, in fact, you took pride when friends hand you a jar or bottle to open because you could do it in a breeze. Chances were, the lid wasn’t even screwed on that tight, you were just built different, you’d say with a shrug once you give the items back. So when the tomato jar doesn’t budge after two attempts, you get puzzled.

Maybe your hands were slippery? You wipe them down with a tea towel and try again. No.

You weren’t holding it tight enough? Fingers held taut against the lid, you try three times. Still no.

Determined, you try different positions before letting the jar go, shooting it glares as if it’d get intimidated and just open up for you. You were also getting lightheaded, and passing out on the kitchen floor due to excessive stimulation of your vagal reflex because you were too stubborn to use magic or wake your husband up to open it for you doesn’t seem like the best way to spend the early Tuesday morning hours.

Magic was even out of the option (well, in your brain it was), because your wand’s tucked beside sirius’s on your nightstand, and frankly, you don’t have the patience to drag yourself upstairs just to flick a utility spell to open the wretched thing. So you do the next best option: lose hope. 

The disappointment was mutual between you and your baby. And the acid reflux did start to kick in, making your stomach grumble in both hunger and pain. This was all going so well until it isn’t, tears began to make its way up to your eyes.

“See, this is what you get for being greedy and eating all snacks by yourself,” sirius huffs behind you, deep voice still raspy with sleep. You didn’t even hear him getting out of bed and coming down the stairs, that’s how preoccupied you were with opening the jar.

He grabs the container away from you to open it, but not without throwing a scowl at your direction, handsome face contorted with furrowed eyebrows and downturned mouth, enough to express that he felt betrayed by this whole ordeal. If you were in a better mood, you’d poke his sides and tackle him playfully, teasing him for being sulky. But for now, you need the jar opened so you could eat in peace. You’ll deal with the sharing food issue later.

“t wasn’t supposed to take long,” you mumble, caught off guard and refusing to make eye contact, pretending the fridge magnets beside sirius’s head is ten times more interesting than his face. You don’t miss his raised eyebrow and snort at your response. 

The second attempt comes and he opens it with a satisfying pop. your mouth falls agape, eyeing the *now accessible* tomato salsa dip in disbelief. What the hell? 

And you couldn’t even take the smug grin spreading across sirius’s face by the millisecond. Refuse to. You try to snatch the open container away from him but he holds it higher and out of reach, making a show of puffing his chest, flexing his biceps, even giving it a kiss. This is all James’s doing, you need to have a talk with Lily soon about keeping these two separated.

“Sirius!” you try to plead your way out. the trademark innocent, pouty expression settles on your face like a second mask, hoping he’d go down this easy. 

It doesn’t work. He just chuckles, mocking your pleas and face while his free hand sneaks up and pinches your unsuspecting cheek to tease you further.

You yelp in mock outrage and swat his hand away, trying your best to keep your displeasure firm on your face, but you feel the giggles coming up. “This is why I sneak out alone to eat, you’re such a bully,” you huff, but take a seat in front of your makeshift spread. 

Sirius places the jar near you, but not without poking your exposed sides, armed with the knowledge that the easiest way to get you laughing (and eventually conceding in an argument) is knowing where your tickle zones are. “Oh yeah,” he drawls, plopping himself beside you. “That’s also why you’re the only one waking up with an upset stomach, stinking up our bathroom so early in the morning.”

Now this one got you appalled, embarrassed, disturbed, basically hit with all the feelings. You’ve been living together long before you got married, and he never brought up this issue until today. “That’s it. I’m leaving.” He makes a move to snatch the sandwich away but the embarrassment on your cheeks made you more agile, swatting his hand away and shielding the sandwich with your hands. “After I finish my meal,” you continue, shooting him a glare.

But see, one of the things that drove you nuts even way back at Hogwarts, was how Sirius Black mostly managed to outsmart you or be one step ahead of you in everything. After you turned him down without much thought whatsoever despite his grand declaration of interest, Sirius took it upon himself to show you (1) that you made a mistake for rejecting him, (2) that his ego won’t let you embarrass him like that again, (3) and that you won’t get rid of him that easily. Once he set his eyes on you, you were face to face with him in everything: grades, OWLs/NEWTs scores, Quidditch plays and bets, wins at the duelling club, even with the fucking gobstones tournament. He never let you catch a break.

Things were surely different now, since you vowed to be with him in sickness and health and untill death parts you both– hell, you’re carrying his child. So you figured maybe, maybe, he’ll let you catch a break this time. Let you eat in peace as you mull over his bathroom comment and how you’re going to get him back. 

But again, no. Unlike you, Sirius remembered to grab his wand from the nightstand. Not even batting an eye, he says nonchalantly, “Accio sandwich.” And the fluffernutter you protected with all your physical might managed to escape your watch, and land gracefully on his waiting palm. 

What irritated you more from this whole ordeal? The prodigal auror that climbed his way up the ranks and became the youngest deputy director, fully capable of complex spells and wielding different kinds of magic, felt the need to do a verbal Accio spell just to make a point to you.

Out of words, you just stare at him blankly. Too stunned to even cry in frustration because you knew you made a conscious, willing choice to be with this man. 

Maybe your best guilt-tripping expression comes best when you’re not trying. Color drains from his face when you remained silent and he scrambles to take a bite off the sandwich before handing it back to you, or rather placing it on your limp hand as you refuse to acknowledge it, still too hurt to budge. “‘m sorry, baby. Just wanted to eat with you since we didn’t get to earlier.”

He did arrive later than usual, deciding to finish the stack of case files and paperwork so he won’t have to sift through them again the next day. There were plans to wait for him before eating, but when the jitteriness and slightly nausea started to kick in, you had no choice in the matter. Sirius had been sulky and clingy the moment he got home, and as compromise, you stayed to watch him eat; listening and reacting animatedly as he ranted about his stressful day.

So you cut him off some slack, also exhausted from all the emotional stimulation sirius brought since he woke up. As a silent peace offering (also because you’re not ready to say sorry to his face), you slide the tostadas within his reach and finally take your bite of the goddamn sandwich. It was good, tasted as expected, sweet peanut butter. You’d probably have it again as a drunk at 3am meal.

Sirius also went and got snacks of his own: microwaved popcorn, pickles, toasted bread slathered with butter, and grapes. Together, you munched on the little spread of random food you could find in your kitchen at 4am in comfortable silence, which is surprising after the earlier bickering. No matter how cheesy it sounded in your head, sirius was the only person that can drive you to the brink of insanity and right back. You were in for a hell of a ride for the foreseeable future; and while there’s a lot of uncertainty right now and changes to be made when the little one gets here, you’re beyond happy that you get to do all this with him. 

Sleep was beginning to creep up on you. Of course he notices this right when you do, so a warm arm wrapped across your back urges you to settle on his lap, bodies melding into the familiar crevices like puzzle pieces, though you both had to adjust certain angles to accommodate your growing belly. You sit like this for a while; your head tucked securely in the crook of his neck, steady breaths lulling you to sleep, while sirius’s hands instinctively finds its way under your sleep shirt and on the natural curve of your belly, lithe fingers stroking and drawing soothing circles anywhere he could reach. 

you wish you could stay like this forever– cozy and soft and safe– but alas, you were carrying sirius black’s offspring. the baby decides to reward you with a round of kicks, probably giddy after feeling their father’s touch. Sirius chuckles and coos at your bump, while a muffled groan leaves your lips from the sudden onslaught of movement, but still refusing to move from this comfortable position.

Smooth cold lips touch the side of your forehead and you relish in the feeling. “Does it ever hurt, love? All that kicking and wiggling?” 

“Not really,” a content sigh leaves your lips. “Feels strange at times, seeing your belly move on its own.” 

To prove your point, two tiny bulges make a split second appearance just above where Sirius’s hand lay. His thumb soothes the area lovingly.

“Definitely getting stronger though; Lily told me during the later months, harry for some reason loved to kick downwards, making bathroom trips more frequent than it already is. Not excited for that.”

He presses kisses on your forehead, temple, hairline, anywhere he could reach without moving too much. “Things that you do and endure for this ‘lil troublemaker,” sirius murmurs. He doesn’t need to say it out loud, you could feel his body reverberating with awe and fondness. You try to bask in it for as long as you could, but a passing thought makes its presence known to you again.

“Do i really make the bathroom stink?” it comes out whinier than you intended it to be but you just had to know for peace of mind. 

Sirius’s whole frame vibrates as he tries to stifle his laughter, taking you with him. He’s laughing at your expense but you feel your own giggles brewing in your belly. You try to hold it in for longer, preserving some self respect. “A little bit,” he says solemnly. You groan, earlier mortified feeling returning in full swing. It triggers another round of chuckles.

“But dove, it’s nothing that my deep love and adoration for my lovely strong hot and sexy wife can’t handle.” He says assuredly, and you curse yourself for being so down bad for this man as blood rushes to your cheeks from his words. Good thing it’s dim and your face is still tucked in the crook of his neck. 

You do pinch his arm in response, and both your laughters compliment the comfortable silence. 

“Although,” he says after a while. “The betrayal of you eating without me still hurts.” 

“Siri.. i’m sorry,” you mumble. “‘y looked so tired, Didn’t wanna wake you up.”

He tuts and doesn’t say much after that. In sirius dictionary, this means he just wants some affection from you— for you to dote on him and coax out his forgiveness, even if you both know he’s not really mad; judging by his arms still wrapped securely around your frame and steady breaths that tickle and fan on your bare skin. 

So you mimic his actions from earlier, planting tiny kisses on his neck, collarbones, jawline, anywhere your lips could reach. Kissing his cheek seem to do the trick, his fake scowl quickly coming undone as a bashful smile breaks through the frown, and his tiny dimple you love so much making an appearance. The muggle maternity books did say dimples are genetic, so an image of a little Sirius running around and smiling up at you with those dimpled cheeks is a warming thought. 

“I am charming all the lids to be stuck at night as soon as i wake up tomorrow for work.” You poke a sensitive spot on his side, making him jolt, but you couldn’t resist laughter as it bubbles out of the surface. “You’re insufferable, I can’t believe I married a psychopath.”

“And you let him knock you up too. I’d say it takes one to know one, hm?” 

#siriusblack #sirius black one shot #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black imagine #sirius black blurb #sirius black fluff #sirius black drabble #sirius black fic #sirius black x black!reader #sirius black x reader #sirius black x yn #sirius black x y/n #sirius black x you #dad!sirius black #dad!sirius #mom!reader #sirius x reader #marauders era #marauders fluff #dad!marauders #marauders au #marauders fanfiction

[jarofstyles]

Can we have another breeding blurb miss jars? Please please pleaseeee

Hm. Yes you may because you asked nicely 😚

Patreon

Fair warning this is pure filth! straight up.. idk what just possessed me

——-

“Just lay there.” He grunted, watching in awe as his cock stretched the puffy lips of her slick cunt open, the thickness of him making her shiver slightly. “And let me fuck my cum into you.”

He had already given her his load, but that wasn’t enough. No, he had to make sure it stayed there. “Let Daddy help it stick. Let me get it deep.” He was so deep Y/N could feel it in her stomach, but she wasn’t about to complain.” Such a cute, messy little pussy…” he cooed, thumb brushing the swollen clit that buzzed with sensitivity. At her whine, her hips bucked up and pushed his cock further in making the pair inhale sharply. “Oh, she’s sensitive, hm? Only came one time f’me.” He clicked his tongue. “Still achy from last night?”

Harry was a man on a mission when it came to getting Y/N pregnant. Every day, he was following the tips from books and online forums, obsessed with getting her as slick and filthy and full of his spunk as often as he could. As soon as she had uttered the sentence about ‘being ready to try for a little one’, he had been on her. Mounting her like he was in heat, insistent on trying every possible thing.

Including this. The filthy, erotic, nasty act of fucking his cum into her. Pumping his hips and burying his prick all the way inside, the slick squelch of their wet skin filling the air. Something about it made him a man possessed. His body was thrumming, balls emptied inside of her but still rearing to go.

And his love, she was so good. His best girl, laying there and whining as her watery eyes looked up at him. Almost dumb, as she always seemed to be in awe every time he filled her up, brain reduced to ash as soon as she could feel the creamy cum being worked back inside of her. All she could focus on was being good for him, helping him get her pregnant.

“D’you think it’s catching?” She slurred, messy halo of hair tangled around her head as he held her legs up against his shoulders. He sat on his knees, watching his creamy length slip back inside of her methodically. “I want a baby. I really want a baby, Daddy.” She pleaded, tightening up around him as he filled her back to the brim.

“M’working on it, sweetheart.” He crooned, eyes dark and hot as he glanced at her face before going back to his objective. “Just shut up and let me work. Tryin’ to make you a mama, and I can’t do that if y’keep running that pretty mouth.” He scolded. The tight heat of her cunt was milking every single drop of cum into her, the daily occurrence never getting old for him. He was obsessed with it, watching the mess he made and the slight froth from how wet she got and the mix of their cum. She was a bit of a cumslut and would want to keep it in her for a bit. “Should get you a proper plug to keep you full. Hm? Think M’gonna do it.” He mumbled. “My pussy anyways, isn’t it? I can do whatever I want to it and you’ll just cry for my cum. My sweet little baby.” Harry loved her so much, but there was a special type of love that came when they got dirty like this. Intimate.

She was a good girl, deciding to stay quiet but nodding insistently. Of course she would do it. His Love did anything he asked if it led to this- just like he did for her. He could feel the messy mix start to drip down his balls, the sac wet and slightly sticky as it lazily thumped against her ass. The pulsing slowed, but he was using her hole to empty every drop. “Don’t worry, baby. As soon as you’re pregnant, I’ll let you swallow it again. Know how much you love it, but I can’t waste a single drop when m’trying to get you full of our baby.” He smoothed her hair back, looking at her sweaty face with tenderness. “My perfect girl.”

#jarofstyles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles fanfic #harry styles smut #harry writing #harry styles imagine #harry drabble #harry styles blurb #harry styles writing #harry styles au #harry blurb #harry blurbs #harry styles oneshots #harry styles breeding #harry styles breeding kink #harry styles flufff #harry styles angst #harry styles fanfictions

[jupitercomet]

Bugs~

I have an exam and a presentation today and another presentation tomorrow. I'm losing my mind right now. Please, wish me luck. 😭

I will try to do you one better

Whoever decided that all classes in college should make everything due at exactly the same time was a horrible, terrible person and you hoped they would spend the rest of eternity paying for it. This feeling also wasn't helped by the fact that you felt like the only one of your friends actually struggling.

(That wasn’t necessarily true, you knew that everyone was having a hard time with finals week. But you hadn’t really seen any of your friends since break and the texts you shared with Jake only proved how little he had to study to pass everything.)

It had all gotten to the point that, most nights, you were openly sobbing in your dorm’s communal bathroom — that had been an awkward check in with your RA — and finally Natasha forced you out of your dorm with a packed drawstring and a stern look.

“You need to relax,” she handed you your phone. “Go to Jake's— And no studying.”

Then the door of your dorm was shut in your face and you knew your best friend well enough to know that she had no intention of opening it again. You sighed.

Shifting your bag to your other hand, you knocked loudly, moving from foot to foot in impatience. You could hear steps moving closer to the door — though even then it was taking too long. The doorknob finally twisted and you didn’t even let him open it fully before you had your arms wrapped around him.

“Hi,” you whispered from where you were buried in the crook of his neck.

You felt his body relax and soon his arms were tight around your waist. You stayed wrapped up in his doorway for a moment, not able to hold back your smile as he slowly rocked you side to side. Much to your dismay, he pulled away much too quickly, scooping up your bag with ease and ushering you inside.

“How was break?”

“Good, I definitely should have studied more though, but everything just crept up so fast. I—” You stopped yourself when you took in his appearance, damp hair and that certain gleam in his eyes. “Wait, wasn’t your last final today? Do you think you passed?”

He merely shrugged, a sheepish look on his face as you jumped up and down excitedly. 

“Oh my god, you totally did! We need to celebrate!” You moved to put your shoes back on from where you’d kicked them off by his door.

“Hey, hey, hey,” he stopped you from moving any farther, wrapping his arms around you again and physically holding you to him. “We're already celebrating, this is how I wanted to celebrate. Besides you texted me yesterday that you haven’t had more than, like, 12 hours of sleep in the past four days, how are you not exhausted?”

It was then that you took in his dorm. His coffee table was littered with snacks and the bed was piled with blankets and other pillows. And it was empty. You turned back to Jake, who was already trying to move you both from the doorway.

“So Bradley—”

“I kicked him out, yeah.” He smiled, leading you closer to the movie night he set up. “It’s just us.”

“And you’re sure you don’t want to go out and celebrate?” You looked at him skeptically.

“I told you, I am celebrating. Now, will you stop arguing, peach? I told you I’d wait for you to rewatch Mighty Ducks together and I think I’ve waited long enough.” He tugged your hand lightly to get you to sit on the bed with him.

You rolled your eyes playfully, stretching out next to him as he started the first movie. You both watched the small television quietly, his hand rubbing soft patterns from where it was draped over your side, a feeling that was almost foreign because of how long it had been since you’d been in each other’s company. Jake was right about your abysmal sleep schedule catching up to you, your eyelids growing heavy before the first act was even over and you didn’t have the energy to fight them. Turning to curl into Jake’s chest so the lights of the television wouldn’t bother you, you let out a soft hum. You were vaguely aware of the feeling of his lips on your forehead.

“Dude, what part ‘don’t come back tonight’ did you not get?”

Jake’s voice pulled you from your dream. You were still a little groggy, opting to keep your eyes closed as you tried to piece together your surroundings.

“The part where you expected me to stay out all night,” a voice, Bradley maybe, spoke significantly louder than Jake had.

“She’s sleeping,” Jake hissed and you tried to suppress a smile. “Why didn’t you just stay with Mickey?”

You heard a scoff, it was definitely Bradley. “Where do you think I would sleep? The floor?”

Clearly, you were not as stealthy as you thought you were as it took a second for Jake to reply.

“Great, look what you did.”

“What did I—”

You felt Jake reach for a pillow and peaked one of your eyes open to watch him chuck it at his friend.

“There. Now go to Mickey’s.”

Quickly you shut your eyes again before Jake could turn back and heard the sound of a door shutting — though you noted it was quieter than Bradley had been when he first entered.

“I know you’re awake, peach.”

Jake’s words had you fluttering your eyes open.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you pressed a soft kiss to his lips.

“I’m sorry about him,” Jake ignored your teasing words with a guilty expression. “I seriously didn’t think he was gonna come.”

“It’s okay,” you assured him, running a hand through his hair. “I’d rather be awake with you anyway.

“Still…” He trailed off.

“Hey, who’s arguing with who now?”

Your words brought a small smile to his face and he moved up one of his hands to cup your cheek, stroking the skin with his thumb. 

“I’m really glad you’re here,” he whispered.

You broke out into a grin, his words lifting a large weight off your shoulders. Though you knew that Jake would never fault you for it, finals had made you feel so behind in all aspects of your life. It felt like you hardly had time for one of your classes, let alone all of them, and the feeling was only drenched in guilt when that meant you also didn’t really have time for your boyfriend anymore either.

“I’m really happy you said that.”

His face crinkled in confusion. “Why would I not say that?”

“I don’t know, I guess I thought that maybe things would be off with us,” you shrugged timidly. “Like, because we haven’t spent a whole lot of time together lately.”

He studied your words thoughtfully, looking up at his ceiling briefly before looking back at you. “Well you know what they say, absence makes that heart grow fonder.”

He said the phrase in such an odd way that you couldn’t help but giggle.

“Do you even know what that means?” You teased him.

“Not really,” he admitted. “But I do know that being with you after not being with you for so long makes me love it even more.”

And you concluded he knew exactly what it meant. Placing one last lingering kiss on his lips, you flipped around in his hold and reached for a Starburst.

“Are you ready to start the next movie? I promise I’ll stay awake this time.”

There was an unusual silence behind you.

“You watched all three of them without me,” you stated, knowing to not even bother forming your words into a question.

Jake pressed a kiss to your pulse point. “I plead the 5th.”

good luck with finals, bb!! I'm wishing you the best of luck <3

#acatwriteshere #the douche bag jar blurb #the douche bag jar

[sonnet-ten]

reading 2 book at the same time yall wish you were me

#im reading boy parts i was mean tot get a physcial copy but my dad has orded it yet HOPING HE DOEST LOOK AT THE BLURB #and im reading the bell jar i could've finished it ages ago but im silly

[buckyysdoll]

joel miller blurb — PUSSY DRUNK; 18+ MDNI; cw: p in v sex !! ft. feral joel loving on his girl 🤭 sorry this is short but it was written during drunk, horny, joel-loving hours 🫣🧎🏻‍♀️— j.m x fem!reader

MAIN MASTERLIST

No thoughts just absolutely pussy drunk joel getting closer and closer to climax, fucking so deep into you that each thrust has the bed frame jutting out and hitting the wall. Neither one of you are speaking, are too far gone for it; there’s only the wet sounds of skin against skin. That, and your heavy breaths, soft moans falling from your mouth and Joel’s groans as his thrusts lose their rhythm.

His skin’s hot and flushed and sweaty and you taste it in your mouth as his lips find yours, knowing full well that he’s coming apart, undone, only seconds away from spilling into your warmth. Joel knows this too, and brings his arm up to band around the curve of your shoulder so that you’re tucked into him, the new angle jarring as he pins you in place; moving, moving.

He’s so goddamn close.

And with his eyes shuttered closed his whole body’s shuddering, teeth gritted hard against near release. And when he comes in a groan he bites down at your shoulder so hard it sends you off that same edge.

#fanfic #tlou fic #joel fic #joel miller #joel miller tlou #joel miller smut #joel smut #tlou joel #joel tlou #joel miller x you #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x reader #joel x female reader #joel x y/n #joel x reader #joel x you #the last of us joel miller #the last of us joel #joel #tlou joel miller #tlou fandom #tlou fanfic #tlou #tlou fanfiction #tlou hbo #joel miller pedro pascal #pedro pascal tlou #pedro pascal joel miller

[muddyorbsblr]

ill-intentioned "compliments"

Drabbles Masterlist See my full list of works here!

Summary: Loki steps in when a man subjects you to his tasteless opinion on your outfit

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Word Count: 955 (issa blurb)

Warnings: creepy men being creepy; the tiniest dose of violence (let me know if I missed anything!)

Things to be aware of: a bit of mutual pining

"I haven't the slightest idea why we have even been tasked with this," Loki muttered, walking alongside you holding a paper with a list of errands for the two of you to run this weekend. Every other week, two names from the team were picked from a hat, and this week, your names popped up.

"Well Pepper said something about it helping the team seem more approachable, 'human', if the public sees us doing 'normal people' things. So getting groceries, getting the cars cleaned and gassed up, picking up pizza…little things."

He grumbled even worse; if he wasn't such a stickler for his princely stature, he'd probably be slouching and dragging his feet right about now. "I suppose it could be worse," he said softly. "I could have been partnered with less tolerable company."

"Why Mischief, are you saying you like having me around?" you quipped, playfully batting your eyes at the god. "High praise coming from you."

"Do not make me regret saying that, little mortal." He rolled his eyes at you, failing to hold back the twitching of the corner of his mouth and hide the amusement. As he often did when he was around you.

"Well if it makes you feel any better, I like having you around, too."

Your words took him aback. "Truly?"

"Of course." You pointed at the next item on your list, before motioning toward the top shelf. "You're the most tolerable tall person I could've been partnered with. Last time I got partnered with your brother I had to push around two carts on my own."

You had to look away while he reached up for the carton of pickle jars, resisting against every urge to ogle at the way his midnight black jeans stretched over his inhumanly perfectly shaped ass. "Well for what it's worth, darling, I would never let you do any of this on your own--"

"We-he-heeeelll, Agent Y/L/N," a voice drawled out, coming from a man who was no less than two decades your senior, eyes filled with such prurient thoughts that he didn't even bother to hide as he leered at you. The way he said your name, along with the way he looked at you, felt like you were being blanketed in slime.

Made you want nothing more than to kick his ass. Or even rack up a debt to the god you were partnered with and ask for his help.

"Don't you look mighty fine today, in that cute little skirt…" The unwelcome lecherous admirer was reaching his hand out toward you, letting out a yowl of pain when Loki stormed over, grabbed the man's wrist in his significantly larger hand, and squeezed.

"I think not," he said through gritted teeth. "You're undeserving to be sharing the same breath as her and you believe yourself entitled to a touch?"

"What? I was just paying her a compliment!" the man whined. "It's a free country, you fucking alien. What? I can't tell a woman she's pretty anymore? Is that what--"

"You know damn well you were doing more than that. You were putting her in a situation to give a clear message, that despite her stature and place in society, because you have deemed it so, she is still subject to your lecherous thoughts. You were going to touch her without her consent because you wished for her to know that you can, and whatever happens in the aftermath will not nullify how she was already subjected to being groped by your grimy unworthy hands." The god squeezed a touch tighter, a near sadistic smile stretched across his face when he began to hear bones creaking and threatening to crack.

"Fucking psycho you're breaking my hand!"

"Oh I haven't even begun to get psychotic," Loki spat out, squeezing just a touch harder and hearing the first fracture finally give in. He begun to speak lower, and you were too far away to decipher what he said next. "You know not the lengths I would go for her, you impotent, tiny, inconsequential insectile excuse for a man. Anyone who sullies her mood will have me to answer to, am I being clear?"

Another squeeze. More fractures. And the once supercilious man was reduced to a whimpering mess, pleading for mercy. "P-Please I'm sorry, just let me go I won't do it again."

"See to it that you don't." The god's eyes glowed a vibrant green for a moment, casting an enchantment that would replicate the sensation of his hand fracturing whenever he would so much as feel the urge to touch another unfortunate unwitting woman moving forward. When he was certain that the spell had taken, he released the lech's hand with a derisive sneer, not even bothering to watch him scamper away, choosing instead to turn and cross the few steps back to you.

"You know I could've kicked his ass no problem."

"I have no doubts, little mortal, but that would also mean you would have given him the satisfaction of touching him." He broke out into a smile when you scrunched up your face at his response, fighting against the urge to reach for your hand. Or tuck that stray lock of hair behind your ear.

Or kiss you.

"Thank you," you said softly as you both started walking toward the register. "The guys back at the Compound got it so wrong about you. You're not so bad." Loki's heart stumbled at your words, only to start pounding in his chest as you continued. "I'm starting to wonder if you're bad at all."

For the first time in ages, the god found himself unable to form words, a warmth blooming in both his gut and his chest. "Anytime, darling."

A/N: Made this for @glitchquake because we should be allowed to wear cute workout clothes without worry about creepy fckers that 100% deserve stabbies when they try to bust out their creep factor 😤

'everything' taglist: @simplyholl @loopsisloops @imalovernotahater @coldnique @loz-3 @huntress-artemiss @salempoe @vickie5446 @athalialaufeyson @lokiprompts @kats72 @kikster606 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @lokixryss @thomase1 @mischief2sarawr @lovingchoices14 @lunarnights95 @goblingirlsarah @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @creationsbyme @maple-seed @mjsthrillernp @ladyofthestayingpower @mygfloki @sititran @glitterylokislut @ozymdias @fictive-sl0th  @lokidbadguy @mochie85 @silverfire475 @joyful-enchantress @elizabethmidnight2017 @holdmytesseract @smolvenger @gigglingtiggerv2 @lokidokieokie @lunarnights95 @superficialdomina @kmc1989 @november-rayne @goddessofwonderland @buttercupcookies-blog @peaky-marvel @lokiified @tom-hlover @dryyoursaltyoceantears @herdetectivetheorist

#loki x reader #loki x female reader #loki fanfiction #loki fanfic #marvel fanfiction #marvel fanfic #mcu fanfiction #muddyorbs writes